#major unrequited love btw

[strxwberrychocolate]

my next high&low x oc short fic is going to be a trauma dump just because I can 🥰

summary: fujio and the girl who's been in love with him since middle school

[crescenthistory]

I saw that you wanted to write the girlies into your fics more often, so I wanted to make a request 8) Can I request a reader x Regulus where reader is crushing BAD on Reggie, and the girlies take it upon themselves to try and do a little matchmaking? I love your work, and your recent Barty fic was AMAZING btw!!!

the girlies<333 oh how i love them and their silly little adventures, thank you for giving me an excuse to write them babes! and for being soso sweet omg you're an angel

Summary: Dorcas has had it with two of her best friends walking on eggshells around each other to avoid their feelings. So, she puts her best meddlers on the case to end it once and for all, and make the idiots kiss.

Words: 5.7k (i am unwell)

Warnings: not proofread, mutual pining believed to be unrequited love, use of y/n, slytherin!fem!reader, background girlies, rosekiller and dorlene, teasing, awkwardness, language, confessions of love, really cliche but makes up for it in sweetness?

Note: who wouldn't be down bad crying at the gym for reggie?

Though you believed being humble was virtuous, you did pride yourself with being a particularly kind person.

Most people in the castle got over well with you, and you had been able to float in and out of all the major friend groups in your year. The self-declared Marauders often ran to hide with you when chased by a consequence in one form or another, and the Hufflepuff quidditch team seemingly adopted you after you cheered them up after their first loss of the season. With all the pressures of Hogwarts and the lives you were soon to embark on afterwards, it was the least you could do to spread some joy, and perhaps receive a bit in return.

At the end of the day, you always came back to your friend group, though – a heap of entangled limbs and snickering, usually found in the same trusted corner of the Slytherin common room. Barty was always in some way or another physically on top of Evan, rarely conventional cuddling positions, while Pandora sat cross-legged on the floor by them, preferably braiding someone’s hair. Dorcas would sit on the table or lounge chair, waving her arms emphatically, often hitting either you or her girlfriend Marlene – the one Gryffindor you all collectively accepted – square in the face, multiple times throughout the night.

Oh, how you loved them.

And if their cheers every time you returned to them from your little friendship tours, as Barty called them, were anything to go by – they loved you too.

Then, there was Regulus Black.

The victim of whatever positions Evan and Barty felt like sitting in, as he always sat at the other end of the sofa they inhabited. The calm and collected of the bunch, except for when Dorcas or Barty said something particularly outlandish he just had to argue with. The multitasker, always with a book in hand, whether for personal enjoyment or study-related, somehow devouring them while catching every word around him. The wittiest one, well-timed remarks hitting people – usually Barty – square in the chest.

The object of all your desires.

Because while you were a kind person, and arguably well-liked, Regulus was the one person you never managed to get quite close to. You were in the same little circle of friends, sure, and had been having friendly conversation and banter for the past 7 years. In theory, you know each other like the backs of your hands, but in practice you had never been alone in a room with him for more than a few minutes before he runs off.

It hurt you once upon a time, wondering what was wrong with you to make him seemingly be repelled from you like oil from water. Over the years though, you realised that is just kind of how Regulus operates. There is some reason behind all the mechanics, but they are not for others to know, just him to sulk over, and you have to accept what you’re given until he’s ready to offer more. Though you tried not to dwell on the fact that it was only you he seemed to avoid to that extent. You had to leave it to him to figure it out, you had decided.

You could live with that, but distance unfortunately made your heart grow fonder. Painfully so.

Regulus Black with his gorgeous black curls that have been so soft to the touch every time you have been close to it during your late nights around the fireplace. Regulus Black with his flowy white shirts and silver rings, gleaming in the glow of Hogwarts’s many candles. Regulus Black with his stupidly beautiful laugh whenever one of his friends could withdraw a real one from him, as if fished from the depths of his chest. Regulus Black with his striking grey eyes that you could get lost in, and have embarrassingly so, many a time. Regulus Black with his–

“Y/N would you quit pining for just a second and listen to me!” Dorcas’s exasperated voice cut through your musings, as you looked up at her with a non quizzical hum, only causing her to groan louder.

You were laying on your bed, almost ready for the night, while Dorcas apparently had tried to get through to you from her own bed mere metres from yours. Your best friend was sat on her bedside, hands on her knees as she looked just about ready to tackle you. Lovingly, of course.

“How’d you know I was even thinking about that?” you challenge, but there is no real fight in you as Dorcas’s gaze has already levelled you.

“You think about much else?”

“Rude.”

“Ruder to call him ‘that’. Put some respect on Reggie’s name.” You rolled your eyes, and had to fight the urge to shush her.

“Oh, don’t worry, he can’t hear us all the way from the boys’ dormitories.” 7 years of friendship had taught her almost too much about you.

“Would you stop trying to read my mind?” You climbed over in her bed to give her the attention she so craved. “It’s a bit intense.”

Dorcas flopped down on her back, sighing at nothing in particular. “You love that I know you so well. And someone ought to read your mind, if you’re not going to speak it.”

“Maybe some things are better left unsaid,” you teased her, but she kept giving you a narrow stare.

“I simply refuse to believe that.”

“Hey, where’s Marls?” you ask, not necessarily because you missed the blonde and pink haired menace you had come to view as a sister. Mostly just to shift the topic at hand. “Wasn't she supposed to stay the night?”

“Yeah, but she’s running an errand for me.”

“An errand?” You quirked a brow at her, looking over at a clock you kept by your bedside. “12 minutes before curfew?”

“Yes,” Dorcas said, giving you a duh look. Stupid you.

As if on cue, Marlene all but kicked down your door with a grin plastered on her face. “How ya doin’ ladies? I brought friends.” In behind her came Pandora and Lily, smiling a bit more softly, though there was a mischievous glint in Lily’s eyes that could only be a poor habit picked up from a certain Gryffindor bunch.

You gave enthusiastic greetings in return, happy to see your friends, but your brow still furrowed at the unexpected guests. A quick glance at Dorcas, whose lips curled into a grin so innocent that it immediately raised suspicions, only deepened your confusion.

“What’s this about?” you asked, voice laced with curiosity but also a growing sense of foreboding. A roomful of your closest friends this late at night – this had all the hallmarks of an ambush.

“Oh, nothing,” Dorcas said, too casually. She was still sprawled on her back, her eyes half-closed, but you didn’t miss the smirk playing on her lips. “We just thought it would be super fun to have a little... chat.”

Pandora was already situated on the floor right in front of you, humming some unfamiliar tune as she twisted her locs absentmindedly, while Lily leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, a knowing smile dancing across her face. Marlene, never one for subtlety, was practically bouncing on the spot, barely containing her excitement.

“A chat?” You narrowed your eyes at them, already sensing that you were the centre of whatever this was. “That everyone knows about beforehand except me? I think that's called an intervention.”

Marlene’s grin widened. “You’re smarter than you look.”

“Hey!” You threw a pillow at her, which she easily dodged, cackling. “Okay, seriously girls. What’s going on?”

Lily stepped forward, eyes twinkling with mischief. “We’ve been talking. Well, more like observing.”

“Observing what exactly?” you asked, a sinking feeling creeping into your stomach. You knew these girls, and you knew when they were up to something.

“More like observing who,” Marlene interjected with a wink, as she casually threw herself onto Dorcas’s bed beside you, almost kicking her girlfriend in the face.

Pandora hummed softly, eyes now trained on her chipping purple nailpolish. “It’s just… you’ve been staring at Regulus like a lovesick puppy for years, and he’s been acting all distant and broody in response. Now that we're in our final year, the harmony should be set right before we all leave.”

You sat up straighter. “I have not–”

“Oh, come off it, Y/N.” Dorcas finally sat up, folding her legs beneath her. “You practically melt every time he so much as glances your way, and we’ve all seen the way you fawn over his hair like it’s spun silk. It’s borderline painful.”

Your face flushed, but you tried to play it off with a wave of your hand. “I don’t fawn.”

“You do,” Lily said, with the smallest hint of a smirk. “And Regulus? Merlin, that boy has been pining for you for too long. If you're a lovesick puppy, he's a kicked street dog.”

Your heart stumbled in your chest. “Wait– what?”

Marlene clapped her hands together in delight, as if she had been waiting for this exact moment. “Oh, darling, it’s so obvious. He’s completely smitten. Why do you think he’s always avoiding you? The boy’s terrified he’ll do something stupid like… I don’t know, confess his undying love for you in front of everyone.”

You blinked, completely taken aback. You expected them to give you a get it together speech, not... whatever this is.

“But– but, what, no, he’s always so cold around me. I thought–”

“That’s because he’s a socially inept idiot when it comes to feelings,” Dorcas interjected with a shrug, never one to sugarcoat it, though her voice softened when she took in your confused face. “Look, Regulus has spent his whole life trying to remain in control, but when he's around you he can't. So, if he can’t figure out how to act, he just… doesn’t.”

Lily nodded. “He’s not used to wanting something as much as he wants you.”

"Oh, he would not be happy knowing you're psychoanalysing him like this," you mumbled, mind whirling, to which Marlene and Dorcas just cackled.

Humour at the expense of their friend – what could be better?

You struggled to process this new information. You had left your relationship with Regulus to fate, an open invitation for friendship without pursuing anything more than that. As long as you could admire him from afar, you figured it was enough. The thought that he might have felt the same, but not know how to go about it felt foreign to you. It seemed impossible, and yet, when you thought back, the signs were there. The way his eyes lingered on you just a bit too long when he thought you weren't looking. The way his laughter – rare and beautiful – sounded a little softer, a little more genuine, when you were around. The way he physically ran away from you when you got too close, always some handy excuse ready...

You had chalked it up to his aloofness, to his enigmatic nature. A large part of you, fragile and uncertain, still wanted to.

“I don’t know…” you started, still hesitant. “What if you’re wrong?”

Pandora smiled softly at you, her eyes gentle but firm. “We’re not wrong, Y/N. The stars told me as much. But if your heart needs proof, we’re going to help you get it.”

Your gaze snapped to her, as blood rushed through your head. “Help me… how?”

“That’s the best part!” Marlene all but squealed, bouncing up from the bed and throwing her arm around you. “We’re going to play matchmaker!”

You stared at them, wide-eyed. “What? No! You’re not– no meddling! You’ll make things worse.”

Dorcas just gave you a knowing look, leaning back on her hands. “How can we make things worse if there is nothing at fuck all going on between you right now because you can't get your heads out of your asses?"

"We're friends, Dorcas!"

She sighed, as if you were a child, but gave you a soft look. You think she was trying to be reassuring. "We’re not going to make things worse. We’re going to force you two to face each other, and maybe then you’ll finally stop dancing around your feelings.”

“I don’t–”

“Too late, darling,” Marlene interrupted, her grin wicked. “Plans are already in motion.”

Lily smirked. “We’ve got it all figured out.”

You were about to protest again when Pandora placed a soft hand on your shoulder. “Trust us,” she said, her voice a soothing balm against the rising anxiety in your chest. “This is going to work.”

You sighed, rubbing your temples. There was no stopping them, you knew that much. Once this group had an idea in their heads, there was no turning back. Still, the thought of whatever they had planned made your stomach twist in both excitement and dread.

Marlene clapped her hands together once more. “Right, first things first. Tomorrow, we’re going to get you two alone.”

“And then what?”

Dorcas’s grin widened. “Then, you’re going to talk to him.”

"Talk?" you repeated, your voice squeaking slightly.

"Yep," Lily said with a satisfied nod. "Just talk."

"That's the worst plan I've ever heard in my life. Scratch that, not even really a plan. Just the worst I've ever heard."

"You're lashing out 'cause you're scared." Marlene said in a fake-hurt voice, wiping invisible tears from her eyes as Dorcas shoved her.

You swallowed hard, your mind spinning with a hundred different emotions.

“Don’t worry, love," Lily almost cooed at you. "We’ll make sure everything goes perfectly.”

"How?"

"We'll see where the day takes us."

Your eyes flitted between the four of them, realising then that there was no getting out of this, and that you were not sure any of you even knew what this was yet.

You let out a groan as you flopped ceremoniously down on the bed, hiding your face in your eyes.

All girls cheered as they knew that was your sound of defeat, and thus their green flag to go crazy.

The next day, your nerves were buzzing like a poorly-executed Cheering Charm gone wrong. The plan – their plan – was apparently in full swing, and you had absolutely no control over it. In fact, your only plan was to somehow avoid being alone with Regulus Black at all costs.

Despite Dorcas's little lecture to you this morning about just ripping the fucking bandaid off love, gosh, you were entirely not on board anymore. Not that you ever were.

You had tried pleading with them again at breakfast, but they had brushed you off with reassuring pats and sly grins, as if your rising panic was nothing but a trivial detail. And so, here you were, pacing in the common room while the rest of the girls casually lounged, casting side glances at you and whispering like they weren’t blatantly scheming.

“Stop fussing, would you,” Marlene drawled, draped across one of the armchairs, looking far too pleased with herself. “We’ve got it all handled.”

“You’ve got nothing handled,” you hissed, feeling the dread creep up your spine. “You’re going to ruin everything. I mean, what if he freaks out? Or worse – what if he laughs at me?”

Lily, who was lounging with a book in her lap, raised an eyebrow over the top of it. “Y/N, Regulus Black doesn’t laugh at anything that isn’t Junior falling down the stairs. You’ll be fine.”

“Yeah, and even if he does freak out,” Dorcas added, casually tossing an apple in the air, “it’s because he’s an emotionally stunted mess, not because he doesn’t like you.”

Your face burned. “That’s not exactly comforting.”

“Trust us, Y/N. We wouldn’t be doing this if we weren’t sure," Marlene groans. "He likes you, okay? He’s just too much of a brooding, melodramatic git to do anything about it.”

You opened your mouth to protest again, but before you could, Pandora, ever the quiet voice of reason, gave you a soft smile. “It’ll be okay. Just be honest. You might be surprised by what he says.”

For half a second you dwelled on the fact that Pandora was the one everyone went to as their little therapist, and maybe her reassurance is not just speculation, as with the other girls.

You didn't allow that second to drag out, lest your head explode.

The sincerity in her voice almost made you believe them, though. Yet the idea of being locked in a room with Regulus, of all people, and forced to confront the swirling mess of emotions you had been harbouring for years? That was terrifying.

“I don’t know,” you said, backing toward the door in a desperate attempt to flee. “Maybe we should just–"

Dorcas was quicker than she looked. She slid in front of the exit, blocking your escape route with a triumphant grin. “Nope. You’re staying put.”

Before you could make a break for it, Marlene hopped to her feet, suddenly all business. “Right. It’s time. Pandora, Lily, you ready?”

“Ready,” they both said in unison, as if this were a Quidditch match and not the absolute destruction of your sanity.

“Wait– what’s happening?” you asked, voice rising with panic.

“We’re just going to have a little chat with Regulus,” Lily said with a wink, standing up and smoothing her skirt. “Should only take a minute.”

You watched in horror as the three of them sauntered out of the common room, leaving you in a state of rising dread. Dorcas remained blocking the door, arms crossed and a gleam of determination in her eyes.

“You don’t have to do this,” you said, trying one last desperate appeal to her better nature.

“Oh, I really think I do,” she replied with a grin. “Now, be a good sport. You’ll thank me later.”

Dorcas with her quidditch strength, picked you up and carried you to your dormitory despite your many loud protests. She practically shoved you inside, landing awkwardly on the floor, heart pounding in your chest.

“Just… read something and try to relax,” Dorcas called over her shoulder, slamming the door shut behind you. “We’ll handle everything.”

“Dorcas!” you yelped, but she was already gone.

You groaned, pushing yourself up off the floor and onto one of the beds, grabbing a random book from the bedside table in a futile attempt to calm your racing thoughts. It didn’t help.

Not even five minutes later, you heard the faint sound of footsteps outside the door, accompanied by hushed whispers that made your stomach drop.

“Marlene, what are you up to?” you muttered to yourself, sinking lower into the bed. You barely had time to brace yourself before Marlene’s voice echoed from the hallway, far too chipper for the situation.

“Oh, Reggie!” she called out in a sing-song voice that was dripping with false innocence. "I think I saw the creature run in here!"

Your heart immediately stuttered in your chest. No, no, no–

“In behind this... closed door?” came Regulus’s unmistakable voice, low and suspicious. There was always something about his tone, that subtle roughness to his otherwise smooth words, that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end.

“Ugh, yes, please go fetch it,” Lily chimed in, her tone too casual to be convincing.

There was a beat of silence, and you could practically feel Regulus’s confusion through the door. “In the girls’s dormitory?” His voice was flat, unimpressed. "Can't you guys?"

"No, you're the one who got an Outstanding in Care of Magical Creatures. Please."

They couldn't be serious. What a master plan.

“It's important, Reg,” Pandora added, ever so softly, but with an edge of persistence that could sway anyone who wasn’t keen on questioning her.

There was another pause, and you held your breath. You could picture Regulus now – his sharp, silver eyes narrowing, a flicker of doubt crossing his face, his brain probably piecing together that whatever this was, it wasn’t something he should agree to. Not even Regulus is immune to charm and coercion from his friends though –and he probably couldn’t fathom the idea of Marlene calling for his help if it weren’t truly necessary – and you clearly heard his reluctant sigh through the door.

“Fine,” he muttered, footsteps nearing the door.

You had just enough time to consider how humiliating it would be to try and throw yourself out the window, but alas, Hogwarts windows didn’t accommodate such escapes.

The door creaked open, and there he was.

Standing in the doorway, looking like the very embodiment of a storm in human form, all brooding energy and understated elegance. His black curls were slightly dishevelled, his usual pristine appearance marred just enough by the casual looseness of his shirt collar, which somehow made him look even more effortlessly intimidating.

He looked around the room, eyes landing on you and widening slightly.

"Oh, hey Y/N, have you seen–"

Before you could answer or before he could even finish his sentence – slam. The door shut behind him with a loud click, the lock snapping into place.

Regulus’s head whipped around, his hand immediately going to the doorknob, shaking it lightly. “What the bloody hell?”

You watched in horror as the unmistakable sounds of footsteps retreated down the hallway, followed by Marlene’s faint, gleeful laughter.

“I’ll kill her,” you whispered, more to yourself than anyone.

Regulus sighed deeply, his hand dropping from the door. He turned back to you, jaw tight, a muscle twitching at the corner of his mouth. "That makes two of us," he said, having clearly heard you across the room that felt increasingly smaller.

You laughed lowly, but couldn't quite meet his eyes.

“So… I’m assuming this beast was part of some master plan.”

You nodded, feeling your face heat up. “Yeah, pretty much.”

There was a heavy silence between you, the kind that felt both unbearably awkward and strangely charged. Regulus stayed by the door, leaning against it as though contemplating whether he could somehow break through it with sheer willpower. You, meanwhile, sat on the bed with your heart pounding in your chest like it was trying to escape the mess your friends had created.

Regulus’s eyes flicked to you, his expression guarded but curious. “You don’t… know what this is about, do you?”

You tried to swallow past the sudden lump in your throat, your fingers gripping the edge of the book like it might anchor you to reality. “I have a guess.”

He raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest in that way that made him look even more imposing. “And?”

“And,” you echoed, your voice faltering under the weight of what you were about to say, “they seem to think that locking us in a room together is the perfect opportunity for us to, uh… talk.”

Regulus let out a humourless chuckle, shaking his head as he leaned his back fully against the door. “Talk. Of course. That sounds exactly like something Marlene would come up with.”

There was a pause, and his gaze, which had flickered away momentarily, settled on you again. You could swear his eyes softened ever so slightly as they swept over you – taking in the awkward way you sat on the bed, your hands still gripping the book like it was a lifeline. You noticed the way his shoulders, usually squared with tension, seemed to relax just a fraction, as though being here, with you, wasn’t as unbearable as you had feared.

He cleared his throat, clearly struggling to find something to say. “So… what were you reading?”

“Oh, uh…” You squinted at the title, stifling a laughter as you realised what it was. “It’s, um… Hogwarts, A History.”

Regulus’s lips twitched, amusement flickering in his eyes. “Really? You’re reading that?”

Your face heated even more, and you quickly abandoned the book, tossing it to the side. “Okay, no. I was trying to look busy while panicking over the fact that I was about to be locked in a room with you.”

"You knew?"

"I got a small warning after I was thrown in here."

"By Dorcas or Marlene?" he asked, amusement gleaming in his eyes because he knew you meant it literally.

"Dorcas."

He hummed in approval before his brows furrowed, as if registering your whole conversation, and he took a step closer, his usual guarded exterior slipping just a bit. “Why would that make you panic?”

The one question you didn’t have a safe answer for. You could feel your heart racing again, but there was something about the way he looked at you, something soft and searching in his gaze, that made it impossible to retreat.

You swallowed hard. “Because… I don't know. You’re Regulus Black.”

The words came out in a rush, like they explained everything, and to you, they did. Regulus, though, just stared at you, his expression unreadable.

“I don’t understand,” he said quietly, his voice low but noticeably not cold. “Why would my family matter?”

You laughed nervously, standing up from the bed as if that might help calm the chaotic swirl of emotions in your chest. “Not your family. You. Regulus. You’re just... you. You’re smart and brilliant and intimidatingly beautiful and–” You stopped yourself, suddenly horrified by the direction your rant was going. “And it just didn’t seem like you’d ever want to be stuck in a room with me.”

Regulus blinked, his posture stiffening as if your words had physically hit him. For a moment, the usual cool facade he wore cracked, revealing something vulnerable beneath.

“You think I don’t want to be around you?” His voice was barely above a whisper, but there was an edge of disbelief in it.

You looked away, unable to bear the intensity of his gaze. “I mean, yeah. You always seem so distant when I’m around. Like you can’t wait to get away.”

Regulus was silent for a moment, the air between you growing thick with tension. When he finally spoke, his voice was softer, quieter. “That’s not because I don’t want to be around you.”

You lifted your eyes to meet his, surprised by the raw honesty in his voice.

He stepped closer, his movements slower, more deliberate, like he was unsure of what he was doing for the first time in his life. “I… avoid you because I don’t know how to be around you without making a fool of myself.”

You blinked, completely thrown by his confession. “What?”

Regulus exhaled a shaky breath, running a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated with himself. “I’m not good at this – at feelings. At talking, like the girls wanted. You make me feel things I don’t know how to handle. So, I do the only thing I know how to do. I keep my distance.”

Your heart thudded in your chest, a mix of disbelief and hope rising in your throat. “Regulus…”

He met your gaze, and for the first time in the years you had known him, you felt as if you actually saw him in his eyes. The real him.

“I’ve liked you for longer than I care to admit,” he said, his voice low and steady now. “And it scares the hell out of me.”

You felt your breath catch, his words sinking into your chest and settling there, warm and heavy. It was as if the entire world had shifted in that moment, the tension between you now a living, breathing thing, pulsing with the weight of everything left unsaid.

"L– liked me?"

Regulus couldn't do anything but nod.

Without thinking, you closed the distance between you, stepping closer until you were just a breath away from him. You could see the way his chest rose and fell, his eyes flickering down to your lips for the briefest second before he caught himself, jaw tightening.

“Regulus,” you whispered, the world narrowing to just the space between you. “I’ve liked you too. For so long.”

His breath hitched ever so slightly, eyes wild.

He didn’t respond with words – he didn’t have to. In one swift motion, he closed the remaining gap between you, his hands gently cupping your face as he leaned in and pressed his lips to yours.

The kiss was tentative, as if both of you were still testing the waters of something too fragile to fully comprehend. Regulus’s hands, cool but steady, cradled your face with a gentleness that sent shivers down your spine. The rest of the world faded away – your racing thoughts, your anxieties, the locked door behind you – none of it mattered in that moment.

It was just him. It had always been him.

As the kiss deepened, Regulus’s usual restraint seemed to dissolve, replaced by something raw and urgent. His fingers curled against your skin, one hand suddenly on the small of your back, drawing you closer until there was barely any space left between you. You felt his heart beating against your chest, fast and unsteady, matching the erratic rhythm of your own.

It was everything you had imagined, everything you needed.

You melted into him, lips, body and soul, before you pulled away breathless. The room felt impossibly still around you.

You were both standing there, eyes wide, inches apart, as if neither of you could quite believe what had just happened. Regulus’s lips were still parted, his gaze flickering from your eyes to your lips and back again, as though he was trying to memorise everything about this moment.

"Do you mean it?" he murmured. You felt his lips brush yours as he spoke.

You didn't need to ask what he meant. Instead you whispered a passionate yes before kissing him again, lingering against him. You could feel him begin to smile against you.

"This is not what I expected to come out of this," you whispered, your voice shaky but filled with a quiet, disbelieving laugh.

Regulus let out a breathless chuckle, one that sounded almost surprised, like he couldn’t quite believe it either. “I can't say I did either.” He paused, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek. “But I’m not complaining.”

You smiled, warmth flooding your chest, and for the first time in what felt like forever, there was no uncertainty hanging between you. Just you and Regulus, and the quiet realisation that maybe, just maybe, all those years of longing and misunderstanding had led you exactly where you were meant to be.

You were about to say something – something witty, maybe, to break the tension – but then–

BANG!

The door flew open, slamming against the wall with such force that both you and Regulus jumped apart, your heads whipping toward the entrance just in time to see Marlene, Lily, Dorcas, and Pandora tumble inside, practically tripping over each other in their mad dash to get through the door.

“There they are!” Marlene shouted, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. She pointed dramatically at the two of you, looking like she had just witnessed the Quidditch World Cup. “I told you it would work!”

Lily snorted, pushing past Marlene and raising an eyebrow as she glanced between you and Regulus, both still slightly dishevelled and very much caught in the act. “Honestly, Marlene, you could have given them a few more minutes.”

You groaned, heat rushing to your face as you buried it in your hands. “Were you all just waiting outside the entire time?”

Pandora gave you an apologetic smile, but there was a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. It made her look all the more like Evan. “We were just… keeping an eye on things.”

Regulus, who had taken a deliberate step back when the door burst open, gravitated slightly more towards you again as he ran a hand through his hair. “I can’t believe you lot talked me into this.” For all intents and purposes he looked exasperated – but his lips twitched in amusement.

“Oh, don’t act like you hated it,” Dorcas teased. “You’re welcome for the facilitation by the way.”

“Facilitation?” Regulus repeated, his voice dry as he glanced around the room full of over-enthusiastic matchmakers. “That’s one word for it.”

Marlene was practically bouncing on the balls of her feet. “I have no words for how pleased I am with myself right now.”

"Evidently." You and Dorcas chorused at the same time, causing you both to giggle, though you tried to stifle it.

“You’re all completely insufferable," you said through an ever-growing smile.

“And yet,” Marlene drawled, throwing an arm around Dorcas’s shoulders, “you love us anyway.”

Regulus caught your eye, and despite the absurdity of the situation and the embarrassment of being ambushed by your meddlesome friends, you couldn’t help but laugh. His lips quirked up in that rare, almost-hidden smile he reserved for moments like this.

“Alright, alright,” Lily said, clapping her hands together as if trying to herd a group of first-years. “Now that this mission is accomplished –” she shot a pointed look at you and Regulus, “– we should probably leave them alone.”

Marlene looked like she was about to protest, but Pandora nudged her toward the door. “Give them some space.”

As they filed out, Marlene shot you one last wink over her shoulder. “Don’t worry, I expect all the juicy details later.”

You groaned again, shaking your head as they finally disappeared down the hallway, their laughter echoing faintly behind them. When the door closed with a soft thud, the room seemed impossibly quiet again, save for the soft crackle of the fire in the corner.

You turned back to Regulus, who was watching you with a look that was both amused and affectionate, his usual mask of indifference nowhere to be found. He stepped closer to you, arms circling around your waist.

"Your friends are idiots," he said with no real malice in his tone.

"Yeah, but so are we."

In privacy with you, Regulus's smile widened in a way that made your stomach flip, as he leaned in for another kiss.

[wooahaes]

i can't run away

pairing: non-idol!vernon x fem!reader [ft. changbin + minho skz, youngtaek golden child, among others]

genre: college au. angst. unrequited love (best friends growing apart).

word count: 13.5k~

warnings: angst. two idiots pining for each other and doing nothing about it. reader gets harassed at one point while at a party (off screen, only mentioned). food + alcohol mentions throughout. reader having a disrespectful roommate + mentions of sex (via reader getting repeatedly kicked out of her dorm room by a roommate w no heads up). loss of major friendship. slight health scare within reader's family. reader crying several times throughout. mentions of break-ups. abandonment via ditched plans (multiple times). growing up, growing apart. ask to add additional warnings.

daisy's notes: i've had this planned for a While now. sequel fic with a happy ending to come.

Your college years were meant to be this big step forward in life. Maybe that was why you were panicking so much the night before move-in day.

As you laid in bed, you mentally went back over everything. Your move-in time was early in the morning tomorrow, which meant you needed to get to sleep soon so that you wouldn’t be too much of a hassle for your parents to deal with come morning. Everything had always been packed away nice and neat and, aside from a few last minute things, was completely ready to go. You had checked everything twice before you and your family packed things up, and the bare walls and, well, everything of your room was enough proof for you. It wasn’t like you had the car packed slam full—but you took everything you would need. Some decorations for your side of the room, your clothing, school supplies… You weren’t the kind of person who hoarded things. Therefore everything you had was in that car. Your parents would be driving you to campus and helping you unpack, and then leaving you there to rely on public transportation within the city. Not that you minded: you liked not having to worry about gas prices. Despite the fact you knew everything was taken care of, all you could do was stare up at the faded glow-in-the-dark stars on your ceiling with this ugly pit of dread in your stomach.

Beside your head, your phone buzzed with a text, screen lighting up. Against the background of you and him smushed into the same frame (a selfie from your movie night a few weeks ago), Vernon was asking if you were still awake.

[baja blast 🚀] god you’re insufferable

[baja blast 🚀] what if i WAS asleep rn? huh?

[mr chwe 👽] you’ll live :)

[mr chwe 👽] i’m outside btw

[mr chwe 👽] also not to bribe you but i brought taco bell.

Shoving your blankets off of you, you made your way to your window to see that Vernon was, in fact, standing outside. He squinted up at your window before smiling proudly, holding up the bag triumphantly while not even risking the drinks in the cup holder he was carrying. He looked so, so stupidly proud of himself. Despite how your heart raced a little at the sight of your long-time best friend cheesing at you, you rolled your eyes and fought back a smile. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of making you happy this soon. Snagging your hoodie from your nearby chair, you made your way downstairs and out of the house. Soon enough, you were sitting next to your best friend, watching him carefully dish out your food.

“We’re still getting breakfast tomorrow, right?”

Completely unrelated to your friendship, which had been set in stone since middle school, Vernon just so happened to be going to the same college as you. While you had been excited over your own program, Vernon had caught sight of their film program and practically fell in love with it (although you couldn’t remember all the details he gushed to you about). Plus he guessed the added bonus of having you around did sweeten the deal a little bit. The two of you had decided to get breakfast tomorrow morning after you both moved into your dorms… Although you knew Vernon pretty well at this point. He’d already met two of his roommates. One of them was some education major named Boo Seungkwan, who Vernon had already said he’d introduce you to sometime. The other was Seo… something. You couldn’t recall his given name, but he was ‘chill enough’ according to Vernon. 

You tore open a sauce packet, giving a casual shrug. “If your roommates don’t steal you away first.”

“Hey, no, c’mon,” he lightly kicked you. “If they wanna come, then I’m fine with it if you are. I think you’re really gonna love Seungkwan. He’s super nice.”

Not more than I love you, you know, you had wanted to say. Instead, you shoved the thought back. The two of you had been friends for years at this point and you’d managed to hide your crush pretty damn well, so you didn’t need for it to start getting in the way now. And, sure, said crush had only developed two years ago (something about the sight of your best friend being ready to throw hands with your shitty ex-boyfriend was enough to endear you to him for life), but Vernon was always your best friend first. There was no way you were going to destroy your friendship with him by confessing. College would be different, you were sure of it. Somehow, you would find a way to move on and keep your bond safe.

But what if I want you to myself for another day? What then, Vernon?

You looked back up at him, licking sauce off of your fingers from where it spilled over your food and onto them. “You really haven’t met the other guy yet?” 

He looked up at you, one hand adjusting the band of his beaning. “Who, Chan? Nah. I mean, he emailed me a couple times. Seems pretty nice, though. Apparently he’s this super smart whiz kid who graduated early, so he’s younger than me and Seungkwan. Same age as Changbin, though.”

Changbin. You nodded along, committing the name to memory. Seo Changbin. Lee Chan. Boo Seungkwan. You chewed slowly, acutely aware of how perfectly Vernon knew your order by now. Same way you knew his. “Anything else?”

Vernon shook his head, only to stop dead in his tracks. “Oh, shit, wait—” He reached into his pockets, snagging his phone from it. “Apparently he’s this hot-shot dancer who’s set on joining the guys dance team. I found him on YouTube at some dance competition—he’s good.”

You’d already heard about the dance team. It wasn’t easy to get into, but that was due to the team being pretty damn legendary since several famous choreographers now came from there. Allegedly, the current dance captain of the guy’s team was remarkable strict when it came to performing every since he took over the role last year (something Hoseok—you’d never cared for the team because you couldn’t join, so you never committed the name to memory), but they were thriving nonetheless. Rumor said he was already being offered a job with some huge company to choreograph for idols. He was strict, but definitely not without reason if that were the case. Sure enough, Vernon was true to his word: this Chan guy was talented. 

“What about you?” Vernon asked after he set his phone down. “You’ve only got the one roommate. What’s she like?”

Ah, yes. The pre-med major you knew next to nothing about because she barely responded to your emails—which, truthfully, wasn’t a huge deal. She seemed pretty nice from what you could gather, but you only imagined she’d be busy since she offhandedly said she’d be spending most of her time in the library. Honestly, you didn’t mind it as much. Whereas you’d be staying in a smaller room with a single roommate and a communal bathroom, Vernon would have a suite with a shared bathroom between the two rooms. Maybe if you could trust the four guys to keep it clean (you’d seen Vernon’s room growing up—you just hoped at least one or two of the others were cleaner than him), you’d be fine with sleeping over once or twice for movie nights with Vernon. Something told you that Vernon’s friendship with Seungkwan was going to be different than whatever you had with your roommate. Apparently the two were talking way more than the few messages you’d exchanged with your own roommate. 

Not that you were jealous, of course. (Maybe you were a little of how easily they were getting along.)

“It doesn’t feel real yet, y’know?” You broke the comfortable silence that had grown between the two of you. “College, I mean.”

He nodded along, leaning against one of the posts on your front porch. “I get it,” he said after a long sip from his cup of soda. “It’s weird. Kinda still feels like we just met yesterday.”

Sixth grade science class, the first class you ever took in middle school. Your teacher had decided to randomly generate her seating chart, and the two of you had ended up at that same table. Call it chance or fate, you were glad either way. Vernon had liked spaceships you doodled on your notes, and quietly asked if you believed in aliens. You had looked at him, staring for a little too long and apparently scaring the shit out of him (he confessed that he’d been terrified you were about to chew him out), and confirmed that you definitely did… and the rest was pretty much history. Although you weren’t a hundred percent sure of your stance on aliens anymore (the universe was huge, you weren’t sure if you were entirely alone in it), the two of you had kept the emojis as a reminder of where the two of you began. A rocket by your name in Vernon’s phone with rotating remarks (baja blast was the most recent after you choked on it due to some stupid meme he’d shown you), and he’d always have some variation of his own name (Mr. Chwe after your karaoke night where you dragged him into singing “Mr. Chu” with you) with that little alien emoji right next to it.

“I’m glad you’re in this with me.” The words tumbled out of your mouth before you’d even fully processed them, and you suddenly looked up to figure out what you needed to do next. Apologize? Distract him? Kiss him, if this were a movie? Vernon just sat there, staring at you with slightly parted lips. 

Then he blinked, realizing you were watching him, and threw on that charmer smile he sometimes used when flirting with girls. “Yeah,” he said, a little distant as he started to pack up the trash from your late-night meal. “Same. We’re gonna destroy this campus, y’know?”

You’d just laughed at him, making some jab that you wouldn’t remember in a few weeks before you moved to help him clean up. He’d toss the garbage once he got home as he tucked the other crunchwrap he’d bought (for Sofia, no doubt—even for a meal with you, he was always thinking of her) into the front pocket of his hoodie. You stood on your front porch, watching him walk down to the end of your driveway before turning back. He waved at you, and all you could do was smile and wave back before heading back inside. 

True to his word, Vernon got breakfast with you that following morning after the two of you had moved into your dorms. He brought along Seungkwan (the only roommate who had moved in—Chan and Changbin would be moving into their room later), who seemed to get along with, well, anyone who spoke to him for more than a few seconds. You had listened as Vernon started talking about this record store off campus that he’d apply to work for so he’d have extra spending money (“Y’know, for dates and stuff?”), making your own mental list of the places you applied to work at both on and off campus. 

Weirdly enough, when you watched the animated way Seungkwan and Vernon spoke to one another, you felt this odd sinking feeling in your chest. But instead you decided to wash it down with a coke and rejoin the conversation, Seungkwan all too happy to include you in his music talk.

Freshman year, a few months in, and Vernon had already invited you to an off-campus party.

He’d meshed well with several of the sophomores in his general education courses, and that had been his “in” to this kind of thing. He’d told you a bit about them, and that some guy named Seokmin was the one who invited him along. When Vernon asked if he could invite you along, Seokmin seemed completely on board—the more the merrier, apparently—and said he’d pick the two of you up wherever Vernon told him to. Which, turns out, to be your dorm. The night of the party left Vernon lying on your bed as you looked through your wardrobe, your roommate out for the night, studying yet again. You were just trying to find something nice to wear.

You let out a sigh. “I don’t know about this, dude,” you said, pushing aside your shirts to find a decent one for a party. Whereas Vernon stood on that line between introvert and extrovert, you were a little more introverted and it seemed to show in your wardrobe in that stereotypical way. You preferred comfier clothing to the traditional “party” attire other people sometimes wore whenever they felt like (no shade to them to be fair: they rocked the look). Unfortunately for you, it left you a little out of luck for parties. One of your new friends, Minho, had even pegged you as being more of a bookish introvert from your wardrobe alone. At least it meant you were comfortable in class. “You said this party is gonna be huge.” 

“And I’ll be right there with you the entire time,” he said. “C’mon. How many parties have you gone to already?”

There was this soft, pale blue sweater sitting in front of you that Vernon had bought for your birthday last year. It wasn’t expensive or anything, but… did you want to risk it at a college party? Sure, you could get any stains out if you needed to, even if you had to stay up all night to do it. You sighed. “Zero.”

“And how many have I invited you to?”

“I dunno. Four? Most of the time you run off with your buddies and forget all about me.”

“I don’t forget,” he said, frowning. “I only invite you when I know you aren’t busy. You’re the one who signed up for an extra class during the first week—I don’t wanna bother you when I know you’re studying.”

Of course Vernon was thinking of you. Despite his thoughtfulness, you pouted as you looked over your shoulder at him. “Close your eyes so I can change or I’m gonna change my mind about going.”

Wordlessly, he turned over onto his side, and the mattress groaned underneath him as he did. He settled, and didn’t move any further, giving you the chance to strip your shirt off and drop it into the bottom of your closet, staring at your shirts again. Shit, which one…?

“It’s nothing I haven’t seen before,” he said, quiet enough that you weren’t sure whether you were supposed to hear him or not.

Maybe he had a slight point there. The two of you were close. You had changed in front of him plenty of times before without thinking about it—hell, you didn’t even care when the two of you were in your early teens. You’d go to the pool with him and strip off your cover-up before an adult scolded you for it, saying something about how it wasn’t “proper” for girls to do that kind of thing around boys. Why did Vernon get to pull his shirt off, but you had to go to a changing room? You’d always despised it, but maybe it was for the best now. If people saw you and Vernon like this, they’d ask you what the two of you were. If he was your boyfriend or not. You weren’t exactly ready to confront those feelings and feel the bitter sting of rejection quite yet. Plucking a band t-shirt from a hangar, you stared down at it before looking at Vernon… and then you tossed it at him, pulling on that baby blue sweater instead and deciding to change into a nice pair of jeans quickly. People might give you looks, but you were genuinely the kind of person who got cold easily. You didn’t need to give Vernon an excuse to push his jacket onto you, too, always insisting that you stay warm. 

His phone dinged a moment later. “Oh, shit,” he sat up, “Hao’s outside.”

You looked up from where you were stepping into a pair of black jeans. “Hao?”

“Hao’s one of the guys—” Vernon turned around without thinking, only to immediately whip back around to give you privacy. “There’s Minghao, the philosophy major. Super smart dude. Seokmin’s the theater guy who invited us to this, aaand Mingyu, who’s still stuck between a couple things but he said he’d make up his mind before the end of the semester.”

“Is anyone I know going to be there?”

“Seungkwan’s coming,” Vernon said. “Chan’s busy with a paper. You’ll be stuck in the back with me, though.”

“Gross,” you stuck your tongue out. “You sure I can’t talk Seungkwan into switching?”

He rolled his eyes, throwing your shirt back at you as he hid his smile. “You know you love me.”

You flopped onto the space next to Vernon so that you could pull on one of your boots, and he looked at you with a smile. “So you always say.”

After lacing up your boots, the two of you made your way down to the van that was awaiting the two of you. Introductions happened after you were both squared away in the back. You did notice that Seungkwan gave Mingyu a look when he asked if the two of you were really just friends. Had he been able to do it more secretly, maybe Seungkwan would have kicked him for it. But you were more focused on learning a little more about Vernon’s friends. Minghao was a dancer on that prestigious dance team alongside Chan and a few other guys that Vernon knew, and he’d met Vernon through his philosophy class (he’d once been a literature major, only to switch at the end of freshman year). Seokmin had met him in the dining hall one day, inviting him over when he was about to eat alone since you were in a lecture, and the two seemed to hit it off pretty well—which led to Vernon meeting Mingyu. Seungkwan had already known Mingyu from a class the two had shared, and he’d known Seokmin through the school choir. It made you feel a little self conscious that the only person who really knew you here was Vernon (as you only knew Seungkwan through him). But Vernon’s shoulder had bumped into your own, and it reassured you. Making friends would be easier if you just talked to them a little more. That was why you were coming with him: to meet people.

Unfortunately for you, the party was pretty fucking packed. Vernon had swore on the ride over that if he wasn’t with you, then one of his friends would be watching your back. He knew how shitty people could be to girls at parties, and he seemed intent on staying close to keep you safe. With a hand at the middle of your back, he’d introduced you to a few people he already knew. From across the crowded room, he could hear someone yelling his name (some dude named Seungcheol who he knew from work), and Vernon had excused himself from you to go say hi. Vernon would introduce him to you some other time when Seungcheol was… well, sober. He’d carried off his red solo cup of beer and felt Seungcheol throw an arm around his shoulder the moment he was close enough to, already introducing himself to a couple other seniors—Jeonghan and Joshua. 

Time slipped through his fingers like the beer in his cup, though, and it took several drinks for Vernon to realize… He couldn’t see you anywhere. Fuck. He’d gotten carried away with talking to Joshua (who had been abstaining from drinking that night—he was there to watch Jeonghan and Seungcheol) about the States that at some point, he stopped glancing back to check on you. Seungcheol had already teased him one too many times about “that girl he obviously likes” while giving some tips on how to hook up with you (out of the question: Vernon liked you too much and knew you too well to try and treat you so casually) that he’d stopped looking so often. Somewhere along the way, you’d just disappeared at some point. He excused himself from the conversation, glancing at his phone to realize just how long he’d been talking to them. He avoided the occupied bedrooms, knocking on bathrooms and calling your name, pushing through people-heavy rooms in an attempt to see that baby blue sweater.

“Oh, her?” Seokmin had said when Vernon finally found him and Minghao in the kitchen. “She left. I told you maybe half an hour ago.”

Vernon furrowed his brow. He hadn’t even seen Seokmin… hadn’t he? “What?”

Seokmin glanced around, and guided a little further into the kitchen to get away from the loud music, right next to where an open window was.. The cool night air hit his warmed skin, and Seokmin’s gaze could have sobered him up alone. “She told me she was going to get an Uber and went home,” he repeated. “Weren’t you listening?”

Vernon scrambled for his phone again. “Yeah,” he lied, “totally. Just wanted to make sure you remembered…”

[ mr headphones 👽] did you get back safe?

Seokmin glanced from Vernon’s face to the illuminated screen, not bothering to try and read it. “Right,” he said. “I’m going back inside. She’s probably fine. Mingyu’s been outside—You can ask him if he saw her leave.” 

Vernon barely responded, and Seokmin merely merged back into the conversation with Minghao. He dumped his drink into the sink, and made his way outside instead. Fuck, you’d left early? And you didn’t even tell him anything? If you weren’t having fun, he would have ditched this place to be with you. Wherever you wanted to go, he’d follow. What was the point of bringing you out if you were miserable the entire time? He stared down at his phone, tapping his foot as he waited for something—even the response bubble with those three little dots—to pop up in your texts. He should call you. But his head was still fuzzy from the alcohol in his system. He scratched the back of his neck, moving further away from the doors. Maybe he shouldn’t have drank tonight to begin with. Not when you were with him. He kicked himself for even inviting you out. Parties weren’t your thing—not big ones like this, anyway. You were fine in situations where you knew people, he’d just thrown you to the sharks and then entirely fucked off because Seungcheol called him over.

Maybe he should have just set up a movie night for the two of you like he wanted to. And… if Seungkwan or Chan had wanted to join, they could have. It could be like old times again.

[🚀] 👍

He breathed a sigh of relief as soon as the message popped up. You were fine. Most likely, you’d made it back to campus and gone up to your room, and then taken a shower. Vernon leaned back against the wall, letting his head fall back against the brick as he shut his eyes. There were other parties he could have taken you to, other parties with less people than this one. This place was too cramped, too crowded, and you were probably getting overheated in that stupid cute sweater you loved wearing so much. You were too pretty in it for him to say otherwise, though, even though he felt like it was a bad idea when drunk idiots could spill their shitty beer all over it. 

Minghao had finally found him again outside while he was rounding up the people he was responsible for. How long had he stood outside, bobbing his head to the blasting music he could still hear—albeit muffled—from where he stood? He kept staring down at his phone screen and that singular emoji from you, this nagging feeling in the back of his head. He wasn’t sure how long, but it’d been long enough for Minghao to drag him back to the car where the others were. Seungkwan was silently toying with the paper wrapper of the water bottle someone (Minghao, he’d find out barely a minute later: he carried them with him for the drunk idiots he had to get home) had pressed into his hands. Seokmin was still giggling about something, apparently having drank more since Vernon last saw him. Mingyu kept whispering things to Seokmin that’d send him into further giggles. In the back of that van, Vernon suddenly felt your absence way more. On the drive over, he’d been showing you stupid memes and cat videos he’d been compiling in a playlist for you. He’d heard your laugh, and felt the weight and warmth of your body as it pressed against his. Now all he could smell was the reek of alcohol and Seokmin’s laugh, alongside the feeling of Seungkwan staring at him every so often, lips pressed tight together.

It wasn’t until long after they were back at the dorm that Seungkwan finally spoke up. He’d been standing next to him in the bathroom, cleaning his face while Vernon was brushing his teeth. “Is she okay?”

Vernon looked up with a muffled “hmpfh?” in response. He’d sobered up more since Minghao brought him back, walking the two up to the entrance of their building and making them promise to drink more water once they got to their room. One movie later, and Vernon’s head finally felt a little clearer than it did before.

“Your friend.” Seungkwan paused, and then said your name after a moment. “Someone kept harassing her at the party. He only left her alone once I stepped in, but she left after that happened.” 

Vernon spat hard into the sink, wiping his mouth with his sleeve and whipping around to face Seungkwan. “What?”

“Ew.” Seungkwan wrinkled his nose as he glanced at Vernon’s sleeve, but let whatever he wanted to say next. He turned back to himself in the mirror, “Minghao offered to drive her home, but she turned it down in case one of us needed him. She said she’d get an Uber, and he went outside to wait until he saw her get in. I think he said he got her number and told her to text him as soon as she was home safely.” 

… Why hadn’t you said any of that to him? Fuck, why didn’t you find him when that guy was messing with you? He would have outright told him to go fuck himself and to leave you alone. He looked at the time on his phone again and scowled: it was far too late to call you. If Seungkwan had mentioned it earlier… No. It wasn’t Seungkwan’s fault. Vernon would just text you in the morning and get breakfast with you as an apology for not being there for you when you needed him (and talk to you about what happened, if you were willing).

Sure enough, you’d agreed, and the two of you agreed to meet at this quaint little place off campus. He sat across from you, watching as you tore the paper off of your straw with this content smile. You pushed it into your cup of orange juice and looked up at him with his gleeful look in your eyes, always happy to start a morning like this. Any other time, he’d find it cute and your love of the drink endearing. But now…

“Hey…” He said. “Why didn’t you find me last night?”

“Hm?” You looked up at him, lips wrapped around your straw as you took a long sip. A moment later, you set the cup back down. “I didn’t want to bother you. Did you have fun? You guys looked like you were.”

“That’s not important,” he said. “Seungkwan told me some guy kept harassing you.”

Your smile fell, and you sank back into the cushioned seat. “You… You looked really into the conversation you were having with that guy. I didn’t want to interrupt.” 

He sighed, “That doesn’t matter—” Vernon’s eyes met yours, and he frowned at you. “You’re my best friend. If some asshole is bothering you, you should tell me. We’re supposed to have each other’s backs.”

“I was fine, Vernon,” you said. “I wasn’t having fun, so that’s why I left. You fit into parties like that way better than I do. I don’t even know why you bothered inviting me.”

I asked you to come because I wanted you there, Vernon wanted to say. Deep down, he hoped to maybe show you off a little. To have someone maybe try and ask outright if you were his girlfriend (someone that wasn’t Mingyu, who he could chalk it up as Mingyu teasing him), and maybe use that to break into that conversation. The “are we just friends?” conversation he’d been wanting to have with you, yet kept shying away from because what if he misread all of it? The two of you were close. It’d taken him forever to figure out his feelings for you, and he was sure you felt… something to him. You hadn’t seen anyone else since classes started, at least. And he hadn’t seen anyone either. Maybe…

Maybe he was waiting for you to take that first step. Whether it was you telling him that he wasn’t being stupid and that you liked him back, or you straight up kissing him… He needed that sign in neon lights. He wasn’t going to gamble and fuck this up. 

“Still…” His foot nudged yours underneath the table. “I care about you a lot, y’know? If you aren’t having fun, then we’ll go do something else.” He paused, and extended his pinkie out to you. “We’re a pair.”

There was that pretty smile he loved so much. You rolled your eyes a second later, locking your pinkie around his own. “Yeah,” you said. “We’re a pair… But you’re still paying for our pancakes.”

(Fuck, he loved you too much.)

Vernon stopped inviting you to parties. 

It took you a little longer than it should have to realize it, considering it had been a few months since then. He’d go out, post pictures and status updates on his social media of and about him and his friends and whatever they were up to. That didn’t mean he stopped inviting you places altogether: he just started making different plans for you. Smaller get-togethers with his (and your) friends, things that were more comfortable for you. Seungkwan always treated you kindly whenever you came around, happy to keep you involved in the conversation whenever he noticed it was veering a little too off to one side. Sometimes Chan would join in, and Changbin—the other roommate, who you actually ended up befriending pretty easily—did, too. Sometimes you’d invite Minho along, too. Your little group would either go out on the weekends, finding something fun to do within the city. Other times, you would all curl up in their suite and watch movies together (or play games—Chan had a Switch and the extra controllers so that you could all play alongside him). You’d never forget waking up next to Vernon during finals week. The two of you had been studying for the psychology class that you shared. For a moment, you wondered if this was what your life could look like if you just told him. But you’d seen how feelings could ruin a friendship: two of your friends in high school had broken apart because one confessed their unreciprocated feelings. They’d never been the same. You wouldn’t let that be you and Vernon.

So you shoved your feelings aside again and again. Even now, as you were waiting alone in a fast food place for Vernon. He was standing toward the front, waiting for your order. This was supposed to be some kind of study session, actually: the two of you had a biology lab that you needed to work on that was due a few days from now. It was Vernon’s idea to do it over lunch. Unlike last semester, the two of you shared way more gen ed classes—save for your English one, although he was just in the other section for it.

Despite your confidence in your friendship with Vernon… You couldn’t help but wonder if maybe he pitied you a little more than he did before. You’d been fine with making friends in high school, but college? Aside from Vernon, you had to build things back up entirely. You had Lee Minho—he’d been in one of your gen ed classes last semester, and he was in your English class now—but that was the only real friend you’d made on your own. Then again, you kind-of talked to the guy in your Japanese class, Youngtaek. He’d confided with you during your first class that he could speak Japanese just fine, but the school wouldn’t let him test out of it, so he’d just take it as a boost to his GPA. He didn’t make fun of your confused pronunciations, either, always kindly correcting you before he slid you his number in case you needed his help. But… That was the extent of it. Sure, you knew Minho’s cats’ names, and you kind-of knew about Youngtaek’s other friends… That was it, though. You were still lost, trying to find your footing in this difficult time in life. Most of freshman year had slipped past you before you’d known it, and now you were just there. Still lost in who you were and what you really wanted in life. And now you knew that Vernon would cancel his plans with other people just to hang around you.

When did this all feel so complicated?

The sound of the tray hitting the table pulled you out of your thoughts, and Vernon slid into the other side of the booth. He started to dish out your respective meals, talking about the biology report that you’d honestly stopped caring about as he did so. Sitting next to the window meant you could see how pretty his eyes were when the sunlight hit them. You’d always thought Vernon had beautiful eyes, regardless of where the two of you were… But the way they looked when the sunlight hit them? That was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen in your life. How did you manage to get a best friend who was not only handsome, but funny and sweet and—

“You good?”

Shit. You nodded. “Just thinking.”

He smiled a little, setting your drink in front of you before he put the tray aside. “Don’t worry about it. It’s just one lab report. We’ve got this.” 

Sometimes, you truly admired how confident he could be in your abilities… and the way he accidentally just gave you an out. “I guess I’m just thinking about the next lab,” you shrugged. “Dissection is…”

“Oh. Dude. We could totally ditch.”

You furrowed your brow as you looked up from where you were unwrapping your meal. “You sure? We only get one free pass in this class. Most people save it for the last lab.” 

“I mean… I don’t want to dissect shit. You don’t want to dissect shit. We’re only taking this course for the gen ed,” he shrugged. “I dunno. Maybe we could ditch and go see a movie or something.”

It reminded you of your senior year of high school together. The two of you ended up taking off in the middle of the day after Vernon found you upset, and you’d gone to an arcade instead. There was a polar bear plushie on your bed that you’d always kept from that day. And now he was willing to skip one of your biology labs for you. 

The two of you ended up braving the lab anyway. Even though neither of you were completely fine with dissecting, well, anything, the two of you managed to get through it pretty fine. Other people would have to deal with worse in the future, you were sure, but for two non-biology majors, just getting through it was fine. The two of you ended up going off to the movies afterward anyway as a tiny reward for not being cowards. In the back row of an empty theater, you rested your head on Vernon’s shoulder. A moment later, you felt his lean against yours.

At least you knew Vernon loved you in some way.

Sophomore year marked a slight change in everything. Life began to get in the way for you and Vernon. Whenever he was free, you often weren’t, and you always seemed to be free when he wasn’t. Sure, you could maybe stop by the record shop to talk to him for a few minutes whenever you wanted to see him, but it wasn’t the same as having a movie night at his and Seungkwan’s dorms (which they’d returned to again this year—although it was more communal rather than a suite). And you… You didn’t want Vernon coming to your dorms. 

The reason why? The same reason you were crying in the break room on your floor. The same fucking reason you were locked out of your dorm room for the third time in one week over the past few months. Your roommate was nice enough… when she was alone. Yet you’d heard her moaning when you came back up to get your textbooks, because you had a test coming up on Friday, and it was a major one. As nice as your roommate was, she never listened to you when you tried to set some kind of boundary like “can you give me a heads up before you start fucking your boyfriend in our dorm room?” considering she did this often. All you needed was a heads up so that you could get your shit and go somewhere else. It felt like you were never entirely alone in the dorm room for long: she or her boyfriend were always around. It wasn’t even as though she were studying in the room. They’d always fuck there, and your roommate never gave you any proper warning first despite the fact you’d always make it clear when something major was coming up and you needed to have some access to your study materials. 

Like you said: if she wanted to fuck her boyfriend, fine, but at least let you get your shit first. It wasn’t as if you had anywhere else to keep your books.

You tried to call Vernon for some kind of reassurance. Either he’d calm you down, or he’d bitch about your roommate’s rude behavior with you. He didn’t pick up, though, only texting back that he was busy at the moment. You buried your face in your hands, trying not to sob again. Even if you had your books, the library was always packed around this time. Where else could you study that was nice and quiet? Fuck, you knew your roommate, too: there was no way you’d be getting back in within the next few hours.

So you ended up texting Changbin, who’d grown closer with you over the break. He told you to just come on over to his apartment without any hesitation. You pulled yourself together, stopping in the bathrooms long enough to look yourself over and calm down before you left. Changbin’s apartment was just off campus, and you’d been enough times that you knew the way by heart. It was only a short bus ride and a walk, but it gave you plenty of time to calm down even further (even if you did end up crying again while waiting on the bus). By the time you came up, you’d seen where Changbin was making the couch up for himself. Youngtaek had been standing in the kitchen, making fried rice for himself when you came in. He’d greeted you warmly enough, yet noticed the fact that you only carried your school bag with you. What other clothing would you have? You’d all but collapsed onto the couch, and all it took was Changbin opening his arms to you for you to move into them.

Thank fuck for Changbin’s extensive workouts. Those big buff arms could crush you like a grape, but they meant Changbin was great for hugs. Involuntarily, you let out a groan into his shoulder, and felt the way they shook with a tiny chuckle.

“It’s okay,” he said, amusement lighting up his voice. “Just get it out.”

You squeezed him tight instead, face buried into his shoulder. Changbin might be one of the most huggable men you’d ever met, if you were honest. The other side of the couch dipped as Youngtaek sat down, bowl in his hands.

“Is it really that bad?”

You pulled away from Changbin’s arms to give Youngtaek a look that could kill. He didn’t seem to flinch, continuing to eat his food without much care. “I couldn’t care less if she has sex in our room,” you said. “I just care that she keeps having sex in our room in the middle of fucking week. She doesn’t even go to class some days! And I’ve straight up heard them fucking on the bed behind me when I’m trying to sleep. I called her out and she kept acting like I’m the stupid one for thinking that, and that I’m the pervert even though I woke up one night to hear her giggling about not waking me up. I told her I don’t care if she does it on the weekend or gives me a heads up so I can get my things and leave, but she never does! I always come back and the door’s locked and her boyfriend’s always moaning—”

Changbin just wordlessly pushed Gyu, his Munchlax plush, into your arms. You hugged him tight, and Changbin leaned forward to get a better look at your face. He slowly said your name, making you look back up. “Why don’t you move in with us?”

“Don’t you have another roommate?”

“He’s moving out in a few days,” Youngtaek said. “Something happened with his family. He said things are under control now, but he’s still going to transfer after this semester to somewhere closer to home. It’s not ideal circumstances, but for you… You’d be getting your own room.” He nodded toward the unlabeled door. “It’s small, like our rooms, but it’d be yours. You wouldn’t have to live on campus anymore, or share a room.” 

… Honestly, that didn’t sound bad at all. You hugged Gyu closer to your chest, thinking over it. “I’d have to talk to student housing, and return my key, and find someone who can help me move if I don’t just hire someone—”

“Wooyoung knows someone,” Changbins said. “I’ll ask him to talk to Yunho.”

Something about how quick both of them were to help you made your breath hitch, your heart swelling within your chest. All of a sudden, the frustration seemed to slip away, and you had begun to tear up. The stress had been building for weeks now of dealing with a roommate that never respected you—hell, it wouldn’t surprise you if she was just acting nice to your face. It made you miss your freshman roommate. At least she was nice to you and gave you a heads up when she was bringing friends over, since you always extended the same courtesy to her. The one time you tried to tell your current roommate that the room was yours too, she called you a prude for trying to stop her from having fun.

Hours later, Vernon called you while you were watching a movie with Youngtaek and Changbin. It wasn’t the studying you needed to be doing, but it was a nice alternative since you couldn’t. You’d stepped into Changbin’s room to answer, listening as Vernon mentioned that Seungkwan had seen you crying earlier at the bus stop. Your grip tightened a little around your phone. Shit, so Vernon knew that something was wrong, and you couldn’t dodge the subject easily.

“Roommate kicked me out again—”

“Again?!” He groaned. “Dude—You really need to talk to her. Get the RA involved.” 

“It’s fine,” you said. “I’ve already made plans.”

A pause on his end. “You wanna come over? I just got back from work, but I can maybe find a movie for us to watch—”

“It’s okay.” You leaned against the wall. “I’m at Changbin’s. He’s letting me take his room for the night.” For a moment, you hesitated. “... I think I’m going to move out of the dorms as soon as I can.”

“Wait, for real?”

Despite him being unable to see you, you nodded. “I already emailed student housing about it, so they’ll have to get back to me. I think I’m gonna at least pack a bag and bring some of my stuff over here in case I need an out. Binnie’s already texted one of his friends about helping me move out, since I think he knows someone with a big enough car for all of my stuff…” You let out a sigh. “I don’t think I’ll get my money back for this semester, but they should give me something for next semester since I won’t be living there.”

Vernon was quiet for a while. “You want some help?”

“Maybe,” you said. “I dunno how big the guy’s car is. I’ll keep you updated, alright?”

“You better.” He paused. “Is that all?”

You raised a brow. “Yeah?”

“That’s—I just wanted to know if anything else was wrong. That’s all.” 

“I’m fine, Vernon,” you said. “Thanks for calling. I’ll see you later, alright?”

It was an empty promise, you were sure. But you let him answer back with that casual, “Yeah, for sure,” before ending the call, as though it were something to hold each other to.

The next day, you confronted your roommate. No more sex until you had moved out. If she wanted to fuck her boyfriend while you were getting everything in order, then she could take it to his place. She’d been quiet for the longest time when you broke the news to her, and then apologized to you. It was… weird to see, to be honest. She said something about trying to change if it meant you wouldn’t move out, and that had raised one of the reddest flags you’d ever seen. At first, you couldn’t wrap your head around why she’d drop everything so quickly. The last time, she’d been quick to insult you for asking to have access to your own room, and this time…

Oh. She was hoping you’d break and change your mind. Well, fuck that. You’d pulled out one of your boxes and bought a roll of tape, and started getting your shit in order. Moving would suck, sure, but at least you wouldn’t be stuck in this dorm anymore. A new roommate might tell her outright to fuck off and learn how to share a room with another person instead of treating it like its her room alone. Maybe if you were a little bolder, you would have done it yourself. She was allowed to have sex if she wanted it: but it wasn’t her room alone, and it never had been. 

Within the next week, you were introduced to Wooyoung, who introduced you to Yunho in turn. Changbin hadn’t given either of them the full story past “my friend needs help moving out of her dorm because her roommate doesn’t respect her, can you help?” but that was fine with you. Changbin had been right there with you that day, too, to provide extra muscle in carrying your things. His other roommate had moved out over the weekend, which meant the room was ready for you. Although you tried to say that you didn’t need so many guys helping you move out, Changbin insisted further. That was what a good roommate did, after all: they were considerate.

(And, yes, he did say that while your roommate was curled up on her bed, watching your boxes slowly shrink in number.)

Youngtaek had been the one to suggest drafting up a roommate contract for the three of you once you got settled in. With your dorm room key turned in, and you receiving the key that Changbin and Youngtaek’s former roommate had, things felt a little more finalized. The two had a little housewarming celebration for you the night you moved in, and left you to start unpacking after you’d finished dinner with them. 

This was nice. Things were nice again.

You ended up inviting Vernon over after giving your new housemates the proper heads up, and that, too, was nice. Vernon had barely taken a look at you before he realized just how much happier you seemed to be. Between work and classes and… well, life itself, you guessed, things had finally started to feel a little more normal. Just as soon as he arrived, Seokmin was texting him about some other party that was happening tonight. You just hugged him tight and thanked him for stopping by. It was good to see his face, even for a few minutes.

It took several weeks of ditching you and canceling plans for Vernon to tell you what was going on.

“Well… There’s this girl…”

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck—How were you supposed to respond to that? You reached for your drink, taking a quick sip to hopefully buy you a little more time to think as he kept explaining. There was a really nice girl in one of his film classes, Ji-woo, and they’d been talking a lot lately. Whenever he couldn’t drag you along to a movie he needed to see for class, she invited him into her own little group… and then alone, after the first few times. From the look on his face alone, you were sure that he was crushing. There was this subtle smile that Vernon always had when he talked about people. The lovestruck look in his eyes, so fond of whoever he was talking about. 

“So you’re crushing pretty hard, huh?” was what you settled on after a while, cutting him off mid-conversation. Maybe it was selfish, but hearing him talk so highly about another person made your stomach churn.

He stared at you for a moment, and then kind of shifted into that cheesy, I-might-be-in-love smile, gaze averting from you. “Maybe. I dunno. I’m still getting to know her, and I don’t wanna do anything until I know I like her… I just…”

“Are you asking for my blessing, you dork?”

He snorted, picking up his drink. “I mean—What would you do?” 

Die, maybe, the dramatic part of your brain yelled. Don’t date her. I love you. Please let me prove it. 

“You already know the answer to that,” you said. “You’re my best friend. Of course I’d support you.” 

Vernon stopped chewing at the end of his straw, staring at you for what felt like far too long. “... Right,” he said. “Yeah, of course—What was I thinking?”

(That he’d know. That he’d take one look at you and finally know if you loved him back. Instead you’re looking at him like you always do.)

“Well… Hey. Good luck,” you nudged him with your foot. “Anyone would be lucky to have you, you know. If you want, I can give you a discount at the flower shop.” You rested your head in your hand, “I’ll just use my employee discount. Fuck the rules.” 

He laughed a little at that. “God, I love you.” 

And you loved him, too. He was your best friend, even if the word stopped fitting so well.

Barely a few weeks later, after the start of junior year, Vernon asked Ji-woo out. All you could say after a minute or two of bone-crushing silence was the weakest congratulations you’d ever given him.

(Youngtaek had been the one who held you as you refused to cry that night. He just wordlessly put his arms around you, squeezing you tight while you fought everything inside of you.)

And now, a little over a month, you were feeling the absence of Vernon in your life. It felt naive to think that it was fine at first, and that heartbreak you felt would be the end of feeling like shit. The ugly parts of grief and pain and disappointment in yourself were supposed to be over, right? Except now, you kept getting ditched for dates with Ji-woo. You knew that Vernon would focus on his relationship with her, and you told him that’d be fine. He liked her (at least, he said he thought he did—he was still figuring it out), at least enough to ask her out officially. No flowers, no fancy anything, he just asked her to be his girlfriend after that last date before he immediately told you the next day. You were his best friend, your relationship was set in stone: he was fully allowed to focus on the one that wasn’t.

Except, as you said, for the fact he kept fucking ditching you and it was starting to really hurt. At first, it had been movie nights at the theater where he promised to buy you popcorn to make up for the times before (Ji-woo had wanted to go to the arcade, and Vernon jumped at the opportunity). You had been left standing outside for almost half an hour before he finally remembered you existed. He’d called you that day, apologizing over and over before you asked if it was Ji-woo. When he said it was, you played the best friend as perfectly as you hoped you could and said you understood. Lots of people put their love life over their friendships in the beginning. That was what endless internet research told you at least. There were plenty of threads that said it would work itself out in time, that it was okay for you to take the back burner and just remind your friend you were still there before you’d boiled away to nothing. A healthy relationship involved both time with friends and time with your partner, not just one or the other. 

Yet it kept happening. Movie nights with Vernon would get dropped within seconds because Ji-woo wanted to go out. You were left waiting in a coffee shop more than once with Vernon’s iced coffee melting across from you. The museum trip he’d promised you because it was this anime-themed exhibit (for an anime you two watched together in middle school) fell through and you ditched the idea of going on your own because it was less special that way. He only ever texted you at the last minute or hours later with another apology. It felt like all he ever did was apologize to you nowadays, and it was reaching a frustrating point. You swore you saw his friends more than you ever saw him. The last time you saw Vernon, he was with his girlfriend on campus, walking to class. You saw the way he looked at her (he used to look at you like that, you thought to yourself, whenever he actually looked at you), and you felt a pit of jealousy underneath this draining sense of grief. Seungkwan was still nice to you, though, and Chan would sometimes say hi. Seokmin even greeted you warmly whenever he saw you, happy to catch up since you rarely saw him (and it almost felt like he was your friend despite that). But Vernon…

You simply couldn’t care less. You had studies you needed to focus on instead. Sometimes you would leave Seungkwan’s contact open on your phone, always wanting to ask if Vernon had blown him (or anyone else) off for Ji-woo. There was a way to check. One simple text to send. But you didn’t: you didn’t want to know the answer. Not yet.

Vernon asked you if you wanted to go on a double date with him and Ji-woo. When you asked who you would be seeing, he simply said it’d be Seungkwan. So you stupidly said yes (probably giving Vernon the wrong idea), and the next day you were sitting next to Seungkwan in a diner booth and exchanging looks as he talked endlessly to his girlfriend rather than anyone else at the table. Is this what double dates were supposed to be? One couple talking the entire time? You didn’t think so. You and Seungkwan just looked at each other way too many times in disbelief. This fucking sucked.

Ji-woo excused herself to go to the bathroom, and you debated following her just to avoid whatever Vernon was about to ask next. It was the first time you were meeting her, after all. Ji-woo was nice. Bubbly, and sweet, and pretty, and you… really couldn’t hate her, if you were honest. When Vernon asked you if you wanted to come on this double date, you were expecting to find something to hate about her. Something you could justify being upset with him picking her over and over instead of spending even ten minutes with you. You’d never been like this when you had a boyfriend. Sure, your ex-boyfriend was shitty, but you still made time for both him and your friends. But between how pretty and sweet she was and the stupid loving look in Vernon’s eyes, all you felt was more guilt for being so mad at him. 

“So… What do you guys think?” He asked quietly. “She’s great, right?”

Seungkwan had nodded along. “... I think she’s nice.” 

… Was that reluctance? Before you could answer, your phone started ringing. You tapped Seungkwan’s arm, and he let you out of the booth so you could step outside to answer Changbin.

“Are you out? Minho said he saw you on a double date or something.” 

Immediately, you started looking around for Minho. When the fuck did he see you? “Yeah,” you said after a moment, still trying to see if Minho was within view. You’d (jokingly) go kick his ass for saying something to Changbin. “Vernon wanted us to meet Ji-woo, I guess.”

The pause Changbin took before speaking again told you everything you needed to know. You probably shouldn’t have said that. “Are you okay?”

Changbin and Youngtaek, as your housemates, were the unfortunate witnesses to your disappointed returns to the apartment. Every time Vernon blew you off for his girlfriend, one (or both) of them would see you come home and already know what happened. It’d been Changbin, though, who dragged you out of the apartment after one of those instances. Fuck Vernon, he had said, we’re going out and getting ramen tonight. It was the best fucking ramen you’d had in weeks, but you were starting to think that it was moreso the company than the noodles themselves. 

With a sigh, you sat down on the bench outside. “I’m fine, Binnie.”

“I can lie about breaking the coffee maker again,” he said immediately. 

“You don’t have to—Wait. Again?” 

“Just say the word and I’ll do it,” he quickly said. “Love you!”

With a sigh, you shoved your phone back into your pocket after he hung up on you. You’d confront him and Youngtaek about the coffee maker another time. The bell of the diner door rang behind you, and you almost stood up to use it as your own timer to go back inside and tell your friends that everything was fine—Changbin just wanted to know if you were gonna be home to eat dinner with him and Youngtaek. Except when you turned, Seungkwan was standing there. 

“I’m going to sing karaoke instead. Do you want to come with me?” 

You looked back toward the window. “What about Vernon—”

“He went to the bathroom after Ji-woo came back. I told her you seemed upset so I was going to walk you home.” Seungkwan crossed his arms. “Are you coming with me or not? I’m still mad that Vernon ditched our coffee date last week.”

You furrowed your brow. “He—”

“It was only the one time, but I’m still holding a grudge,” he said, sighing. “He should have texted. I wasted money on him since he said he’d be there.”

Well. That answered one of your questions. You said yes anyway, and Seungkwan immediately smiled, taking your hand and happily guiding you away. By the end of the night, your throat was raw and aching from screaming lyrics alongside Seungkwan, but it was comforting to know you weren’t alone. When he wasn’t entertaining you by yelling alongside you, his voice was genuinely beautiful to listen to. The two of you ended up getting street food together to replace the meal you didn’t have with Vernon and Ji-woo, and Seungkwan seemed a little happy to finally bitch about a couple things. While Vernon only blew him off the one time, it was enough to piss Seungkwan off because no one treated him like that. He’d chewed him out when he came back, saying that real friends called instead of leaving their friend to throw away a melted iced coffee. He later walked you to your bus stop, telling you goodnight as he squeezed your hands. The two of you should talk more (for non-bitching reasons, too). You watched him continue on toward the apartment he now shared with Vernon and Chan, and felt a little better about all of this.

At least you weren’t entirely alone.

A few months later, your grandpa got sick. Despite the insistence that he would be fine, you were terrified. Everything around you seemed to spiral into disaster. Between late assignments and a failed test, it felt like you were going to just… break. Your family told you to finish out your semester and come see him during break, that this wasn’t serious and he’d lived through worse. All you could think about was the fact that the one person you could talk to about this just… wasn’t there for you. He was on a date with Ji-woo. You tried calling him, and he denied it on the second ring. He texted you back to ask if it was important, since he was on that date.

You told him it wasn’t and to have fun on his date. Changbin was busy, and so was Youngtaek, which meant you would turn to the only other person you often hung out with nowadays. Minho answered your text within seconds when you asked if you could come over, and then followed up that ‘yes’ with asking whether it was serious.

[ 🦀 ] it is. family stuff.

[ 🦀 ] is that okay?

[ 🐈 ] just wanted to be ready

[ 🐈 ] see you soon

You shoved your things into your hoodie pocket and made your way to Minho’s apartment. His roommate was out when you got there, and Minho made a comment about how Chris wouldn’t be back until later that night anyway—so it was just the two of you for a while. By the time you’d sat down with him, you were already breaking down crying. He listened as you cried, pushing a box of tissues your way (Minho came prepared for this) as soon as you needed it. 

“You should trust your family on this,” he told you. “If they thought you needed to come home, they would be honest with you. If things suddenly changed and it looked like you might lose him, then they would tell you. Right?”

“Right, but…” Your grandpa wasn’t the only person you felt like you were losing now.

When was the last time you and Vernon hung out, not including the double date you and Seungkwan ditched? Before the semester started? Even then, he’d been ditching you to hang out with Ji-woo. Even now, you wished you could hate her. Or him. He was the one who was ditching you, not Ji-woo. Or maybe even both of them, when you thought about it now. Seungkwan had been the one who lied to her face and told her that you were upset about something, and you never heard a word from Vernon that night. What could Ji-woo have told him…? Fuck being mad at any of them at this point: that was energy you didn’t want to expend. 

If this was how it ended, then so fucking be it. 

Except it wasn’t. That wasn’t how it would end, because Vernon broke up with Ji-woo five months later, long after you went home and saw your grandpa in better health. He posted something on his private Twitter about it, so you decided to text him.

[🚀] hey, i just saw your priv

[🚀] i’m so sorry things didn’t work out for you two. are you alright?

[vernon 👽] yeah just

[vernon 👽] idk it’s a lot to process

[vernon 👽] i don’t think i’ve figured it all out yet

[🚀] you wanna talk about it? i’m here if you need me.

[vernon 👽] idk she just kept blowing me off for stuff

[vernon 👽] i mean. she can have friends, that’s not a problem at all. i’m never gonna stop her from that.

[vernon 👽] but like… she kept canceling out dates at the last second, or she’d forget about our plans because one of her friends wanted to go do something and they got mad at her for spending all her time w me, so she figured she should spend more time w them

[vernon 👽] just started to feel like i wasn’t important to her, y’know? 

[vernon 👽] like. not important enough to say ‘hey babe, suhyun wants to go to the amusement park and i’ve kind of neglected her, won’t make dinner today’ 

Oh. All at once, you were seething. As much as you wanted to feel bad for him, your anger kept building and building toward this ugly peak. Not now, you told yourself. You could be mad at him, but he was going through a tough time. 

(Where was he during YOUR tough times, you mentally shot back.)

[🚀] oh dude… i’m sorry

[🚀] that really sucks. i’m so sorry.

[🚀] i hope you feel better soon.

You turned your phone onto silent before slamming it down onto your bed, too choked up with emotions to say anything else. You had managed to pull it together long enough to say something that was hopefully nice, and now everything was hitting you hard and suffocating you. You wanted to throw something—anything—or scream in frustration. This sucked. You knew it sucked. But, fuck, you just wanted to go and scream at him “you see how fucking bad that feels?! To have someone you care about not fucking care anymore?!” and you didn’t. You couldn’t. It made you realize that neither of you have even addressed the fact you haven’t spoken in several months now.

You stepped out of your room, leaving your phone behind to get a glass of water. Maybe if you kept pushing your feelings down, you could redirect your anger into something better. If push came to shove, then you’d just go out and walk until you felt better. Youngtaek had been standing in the kitchen, preparing snacks.

“Oh, you’re home?” He didn’t look up past the quick glance he’d given you before he went back to arranging snacks. “Yeonjun and Wooyoung are coming over for game night. You don’t have to join us, but Changbin and I know you’re kind of friends with them, so you’re welcome to join us if you—”

The moment you sniffled, he looked up and realized something was wrong. All of a sudden, you couldn’t hold it in anymore. Something about being around other people you trusted made it harder for you to keep your emotions fully under wraps. Vernon once told you that you wore your emotions on your sleeve, and maybe that was still true. Youngtaek pulled you into his arms when you broke, letting you sob into his shoulder as he held you.

“Is it Vernon again?”

Youngtaek knew. Everyone knew, didn’t they? But Youngtaek and Changbin knew the most, next to Minho.

“You can’t keep avoiding this,” he said gently, stroking your hair. “It’s not fair to you.”

“He broke up with her,” you mumbled, “because she kept canceling plans a-and ditching him and…”

Youngtaek drew back, staring at you. “He what.” 

“And–And he didn’t feel like he was important to her at all anymore, a-and she would keep doing it last second or forgetting—”

You’d rarely seen Youngtaek look genuinely angry. He got frustrated, sure, because he was human. But this pissed? You weren’t sure you could even count how many times he was this outwardly angry. He masked it well before you now, though, taking a deep breath before he cut you off.

“One of my friends wants to go on a camping trip in a few weeks,” he told you. His hands rested on your shoulders, fingers slightly digging in. “He told me that some of his friends canceled for other plans, and that I could invite a few people if they wanted to come. You’re coming with me.”

You opened your mouth to speak.

“I mean it,” he said. “If you really don’t want to go, I won’t force you, but I think you need it. I’ll take your phone if you want, and it’ll just be us and a couple friends. We’ll cook together, and hike, and—and we’ll just have fun enjoying nature.”

You shut your mouth, slowly nodding. Maybe he was right and you needed to get away from all of this. It wasn’t going to be too much—camping here wasn’t all that out there as it was in other places—but you’d met some of Youngtaek’s friends before. Maybe you could talk them into a game of mafia. They’re all so genuinely horrible at it (they recorded it once for fun and Youngtaek sent you the YouTube video), it’d probably be fun to watch. 

Seungkwan was the one who reached out to you while you were helping Youngtaek make snacks. You stepped into your room to answer your phone, and learned that it was him and Chan who were cheering Vernon up. 

“I asked if he wanted to invite you over,” Seungkwan said quietly. “He said he didn’t want to burden you.”

You weren’t sure what to say. “Oh.” 

“I don’t know what to do.” Seungkwan went quiet for a moment. “You two used to be so close, and now…”

At least someone else saw it.

“I know you’re hurting, too,” he said. “Vernon said you texted him. I almost told him off because the reason he broke up with her was the same thing he was doing toward you. DId he ever come back?”

He didn’t. Your silence said that for you.

“Ah, really…” Seungkwan sounded annoyed, too. Less pissed than Youngtaek, but Seungkwan hadn’t seen how many times you’d felt rejected by your own ‘best friend.’ “I should tell him off after he feels better—”

“Don’t.” You shut your eyes. “It’s fine, Seungkwan. Just go be there for him.” 

“I will,” he said. “But you don’t have to lie to me. It’s not fine. I would have dropped a friend over this. If you need me, just text me, okay?”

It’s funny. You never really considered Seungkwan a close friend of yours. He was always someone you saw as a person you were on good terms with. The two of you didn’t hang out or do anything more than occasionally talk. There were no coffee dates, no study dates. Not like what you did with Minho and Changbin and Youngtaek—and, sometimes, Yeonjun. You paused, staring down at your friend for a moment as you returned to Youngtaek (and the newly arrived Yeonjun and Wooyoung).

“Hey… Can I invite a friend?” You looked up from your phone to the group. “It’s Minho.” 

They all knew Minho. They told you to go ahead if he wasn’t busy. The more the merrier. Minho texted back a few minutes later, saying he’d stop by the store on his way over, so to let him know if you guys wanted any snacks. People dished out their requests, and you’d merely asked for a melona bar. A few minutes later, you realized what you were craving, and texted him asking if he would get you banana snacks instead. He said he’d already let the store, and you’d made peace with it. You’d get the snacks some other time. 

Yet when he showed up, he passed you a small bag with your ice cream and a bag of banana-flavored snacks before he settled in beside you, hiding a smile.

Vernon was checking his phone again, this gnawing feeling within him to do so. He followed… well, a lot of people on social media. Friends. Friends of friends. He wasn’t exactly sure why, if he was honest. He kind-of liked seeing what other people were up to, since sometimes it’d give him ideas for his own stuff with friends. And then he saw you, and that gnawing feeling suddenly went away.

He’d met Youngtaek before enough to recognize him immediately. You were sandwiched between him and Bae Seungmin (another guy in your year—Vernon had a few classes with him before) in the background of a photo shared by someone else. Did he even know a Jangjun? He wasn’t sure. He’d have to see if he recognized him later. Instead, he just zoomed in on the three of you among hte group.

(Turns out, though, he did recognize Jangjun. He’d met him at a couple parties. He was the loud dude who did a spot-on cicada impression at one of them… and Vernon was actually pretty damn sure that Jangjun was sober that time.)

You looked… happy. Your eyes were sparkling in every picture, so completely filled with joy at being with the people you were with. Some other guy was hugging you tight in another picture. You were laughing in another one, holding a sparkler alongside the people around you. When did you get so close with other people? It felt like just yesterday you were getting lunch with him before you worked on a biology lab report. A few nights later, you had confessed that you felt lonely outside of him and a few other people. But he could see the can of cheap beer in your hand, and he suddenly understood a little better: you were always a little touchier, a little more carefree whenever you drank. He clicked the tag on the photo with the guy hugging you tight, smiling like he was yours: Sungyoon. He didn’t know Sungyoon. Were you two…? Had you…? 

He clicked on your page to find out. There wasn’t much on there (you weren’t active on social media, to be fair) but there was more than the last time he’d checked. The pictures of him were further down your page now. You had pictures of you and Youngtaek, taken in mirrors at a store. Of you and Changbin and a few more of his friends, throwing up peace signs while in a park, street food in hand. Of Minho, crouching inside of a cat cafe, feeding a cat a treat, saying you’d leave him to be with “his kind” since there were other pictures where he was surrounded by cats. Then another picture of you and Seungkwan, dated days after that diner date he had with Ji-woo. Seungkwan had an arm around your shoulder, pulling you in as the two of you beamed at the camera.

When was the last time he saw you smile like that?

You didn’t go home as much as you wanted to. Between school and work and life, it became a little harder to make that trip to see your family often. You’d taken a week long vacation, partially to go camping, and the rest was dedicated to your family. It was nice to eat your dad’s cooking again, and to sleep in your childhood room again. You walked the neighborhood a bit, too, hands tucked into your pockets as you enjoyed being somewhere you wouldn't exactly call home anymore. But that was part of growing up. Home became different places throughout life. This was just one of them, even if you couldn’t actively call it yours anymore. It was nice, except for the part where your mom was giving you shit for being single and lonely and whatever.

“I always thought you and Vernon would have gotten together,” she said while making you breakfast. Unbeknownst to her, that was the one thing that could have made you cry.

You later went out for another walk around the neighborhood. Tomorrow morning, you’d go back to your apartment and get ready for work later that day. The world seemed to be against you, though, because this walk was what made you realize that you weren’t the only one who’d come home to visit family. Vernon was inside, hugging his sister visibly from the window. He must have just come in as a surprise. His house was only a few down from yours. You’d move on in a moment. Instead, you just watched a moment longer, wondering if maybe you should walk up and ring the doorbell. Say hi to the second family you had. You sighed after a moment, and made a move on to get home.

Inside, Sofia was whining at him for hugging her so tight… and because it’d been years since she’d seen you. Vernon could feel his own ache of heartbreak. Sofia hadn’t liked Ji-woo when he brought her around.

She pushed his arms off of her, flopping down onto the couch, “You should just tell her.” 

Maybe one day he would, if he could stop being a coward.

Senior year came and went faster than you knew.

You didn’t talk to Vernon anymore. He didn’t text you. Finally, you think that this was it. One friendship undone and slowly dying for far too fucking long. It almost made you want to hold a funeral, if you were honest. The most you’d heard from him was a birthday text and the invitation to do something that you responded to with an apology, because you’d already made plans with other people. Minho had stayed by your side throughout your birthday, happy to spend the day with you at an amusement park. Youngtaek and Changbin had come with you, too, bringing along Yeonjun and Wooyoung and a few others. You never really liked being the center of attention, but you didn’t mind so much during this last birthday. One of Minho’s friends, Felix, had danced with you happily, fingers intertwined. You’d joked to Minho that he should bring Felix around more often: he seemed like a sweet guy.

At some point, though, you sat down to address your feelings for real. You had been friends with Vernon for years, and all of it seemed to disappear all too quickly. You had cried over it plenty of times, but you were hit with this sense of relief at long last. Not because it was over, because that would always leave this subtle ache in your chest. Relief because you had finally learned how to let go and stop fighting a losing battle. You could finally rest now, and focus on the people that loved you out loud in your life. People like Youngtaek, who laughed beside you when you had movie nights in the apartment. Sometimes it ended with popcorn in your hair, but you’d never hold it against him for too long. Changbin, who was the best gym buddy you could ever ask for. Despite how intense his workouts could be, he was always mindful of you adhering to your own limits. Minho, who gave you quiet understanding whenever you needed it most. Your outings to cat cafes always made you smile, though, especially when he used it as a springboard to talk about how he’d one day move Soonie, Doongie, and Dori into his apartment. These were the people who had found you along the way, and walked alongside you when you needed them. Even Seungkwan, who wasn’t your close friend, had reached out to you every so often to check on you because he cared. 

All good things came to an end. That was what you would tell yourself to feel better. Your friendships would come to an end one day, whether that be with an explosion or a quiet fizzle was something only time would tell. All you needed was to wait for the tide to come in and wash away the reminders of Vernon left along the sand.

Then you could run away.

taglist: @twancingyunhao @wonuziex @synthetickitsune @gyulbabie

[britney-rosberg06]

🐝 send me a fake fic title, and I’ll make up a summary for it! (So I’m giving songs lyrics as titles)

-Angel (you're my darling angel)

-I'm hooked on a feeling (believing that you're in love with me)

For loscar & valewis

gonna do tags btw too

Angel (You’re my darling angel) - Valewis

Hurt no comfort, major character death, hospitals, soulmates, partners in life, terminal illness. Acceptance

Valtteri’s been sick for a while. They both didn’t accept it. They couldn’t accept it. But now it was Christmas Eve and they were in the emergency room with the kids waiting outside. And they knew

I’m hooked on a feeling (believing you’re in love with me) - loscar

High School AU, Fluff, Nerd/Jock, abusive parents, So High School, (Not Actually) Unrequited love, forgotten childhood friend, hurt comfort

Senior Year. This was it. Valedictorian was just nine months from being Oscar. And nothing and no one would be able to stop him. Unless that cute football boy keeps looking so sad when he gets grades handed to him from across their english class and spending lunch hour asking him to tutor.

[aventurineswife]

Can you write me a fanfiction about high school au gay!dom!yandere!catboy! Ratio painting a nude portrait (sfw) (emphasis on the feet) of f!reader who is 6'7 , has major self diagnosed depressive disorder and has a crush on him ? Can you also include hurt hurt/no comfort (because he's gay :( ) and much angst : Also note they're in France because It s my favourite country please , sometimes have recurring dreams about walking i to Target the store with him and finding bionickes Thank you Please remember to make it sfw please because I'm not weirdI will be waiting patiently . I won't bother you again but I would loveto play minecraft together somdtime xx Btw the text is purple because I love him lots and loads 💜💜💜

“You can’t expect to stay in someone’s heart when you were never truly invited”

Summary: In a quiet art studio in Paris, you become the subject of Ratio's final project—a portrait that reveals far more about his detached genius than it does about you. As he paints, your unrequited feelings grow, tangled with dreams of closeness that reality continuously shatters. In the end, you come to understand that loving someone like him means enduring silence, detachment, and an aching loneliness in the shadow of his brilliance.

Tags: Unrequited Love, Angst, High School AU, Modern AU, Yandere Elements, Hurt/No Comfort, Art Student Ratio, Intellectual Obsession, France Setting, Dream Sequences, Bittersweet.

Warnings: Themes of Unrequited Love and Emotional Distance, Hurt/No Comfort, Melancholy and Loneliness, Self-Deprecation.

A/N: THIS IS SO SADD!!! 😪💔 I tried my best in writing this fic, I hope you like!! 🤧 And I would love to play Minecraft with you too but sadly I'm a broke college student with no money :') I'm not good at describing character(s) description so forgive me for most part for not including them 😪💔 but I hope you like it!

For as long as you can remember, art class had been your favorite period, and yet today, it felt different. Ratio, a mysterious, magnetic student with wavy violet hair and the kind of intellect that seemed worlds beyond your own, had chosen you as his subject for the semester’s final project: a portrait in oils.

Ratio was one of the few who had been recruited by the school specifically for his academic achievements, and his choice to paint you, out of all the students, felt like an unexpected spotlight you didn’t want to face. The world had already made it clear, after all, that your presence was unusual—at 6'7", you often felt like you were towering over everyone else in class. You had a secret, lingering crush on Ratio, even if you knew that, in his eyes, you were nothing more than a curiosity.

As you stand in the studio in front of his canvas, you can’t help but feel the weight of his gaze, analyzing every angle, every shadow on your form. He sits with perfect poise, like an artist conjuring life from blankness, while you stand frozen, barefoot on the cold tile, your heart pounding as he captures your every detail—feet and all.

“Stay still.” he murmurs, barely glancing up from his brushwork.

The words are spoken with such cool detachment, yet they send a chill through you. His voice always did that, as though his intellect could pierce through to whatever lingering fragments of hope and warmth you held inside.

The studio around you is empty, save for you and him. It had been this way for a few weeks, each session unraveling a little more of the mystery between you both. Though he kept his distance, Ratio had a presence that seemed to seep through the air itself, lingering in the room like an aroma that stayed long after he’d left.

“Are you comfortable?” he asks suddenly, his eyes fixed on your feet, studying them with the same intensity he’d give a particularly complex theorem.

You swallow, feeling self-conscious. “Yeah… yeah, I guess.”

He tilts his head, a small, unsettling smile playing at the corner of his lips. “Good. It’s important that the subject of my work… endures.”

The word lingers, echoing in your mind with a mix of foreboding and curiosity. For all his intellectual prowess, Ratio had this strange, obsessive quality to him, one that made his attention feel like a spotlight that burned rather than warmed.

You’ve had dreams of him, quiet, simple ones where you both walk the aisles of a Target, stumbling upon a shelf filled with nostalgic toys—Bionicles, the plastic figures you’d both somehow laughed over in passing. In those dreams, he seemed almost approachable, as if the veneer of his brilliance had softened, letting you see the boy beneath. But those were only dreams, fleeting escapes from the reality that Ratio was, in fact, unattainable.

The brushstrokes pause, and he finally looks up. “You seem... preoccupied.” he observes, the ghost of a smirk gracing his face.

You feel a lump rise in your throat. “Just… thinking about things.”

“Ah,” he says, dismissively. “How pedestrian.”

It stings, as his words often do, each one a reminder of the distance between your world and his. And yet, some part of you clings to this hurt, as though the very ache of it brings you closer to him. You’d accepted long ago that Ratio wasn’t meant for you, but the thought of him painting you, studying you, even in his cold, clinical way, was a kind of agony that you welcomed. It was the closest you’d ever come to being seen by him.

Days pass in a cycle of silence and tension, the canvas slowly filling with his painstaking vision of you. You find yourself losing hours at night to thoughts of him, of what it would mean for someone like Ratio to care for you. Perhaps, in another life, you’d sit with him in a park, whispering your secrets under the soft Parisian twilight. But then reality would settle in—he was, after all, himself, and you were just a subject, a fleeting moment captured in paint.

One afternoon, as he works, he breaks the silence. “You’re hiding something.” he says, his tone unreadable.

You blink, unsure how to respond. “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” he begins, a dangerous glint in his eyes, “that you’re harboring thoughts. Sentiments. I can feel them.” His voice drops, a note of something almost sinister lurking beneath. “It disrupts the balance of my work.”

You shift uncomfortably, your heart hammering. “I don’t… I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He leans forward, his face close enough that you can feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. “It’s futile, you know,” he whispers, almost tenderly. “These thoughts of yours. They serve no purpose in the grand scheme of things.”

The words cut through you, sharper than any rejection. You want to ask him how he knows, how he could possibly be aware of the feelings you’d hidden so deeply. But you realize it doesn’t matter. Ratio was as perceptive as he was brilliant, and in his eyes, emotions were nothing more than distractions, mere flaws in the perfect structure of his world.

He leans back, resuming his work as though nothing had happened, his face once again a mask of serene indifference. The silence stretches on, heavy and suffocating, but you endure it, as you always do, standing barefoot and exposed under his gaze.

As the final brushstroke is placed on the canvas, Ratio steps back, studying his work with a sense of satisfaction. “It’s done.” he says, barely sparing you a glance.

You look at the portrait, feeling a strange mix of awe and sadness. He’d captured you perfectly—every detail, every flaw, every inch of the person you were. And yet, there was something missing, a hollowness that reflected not you, but his vision of you: detached, cold, almost lifeless. In his art, you were nothing more than a vessel, an empty form, devoid of the feelings you’d foolishly hoped he might one day see.

“Thank you...” you murmur, feeling the weight of the moment settle over you.

He turns to you, his eyes as cold and unyielding as ever. “You served your purpose.”

The words are simple, yet they resonate within you, a painful reminder that you were nothing more than a momentary fixation, a fleeting presence in the orbit of his genius. Ratio gathers his brushes, the quiet clinking of paint jars filling the room as he begins to pack up, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

As he leaves, you realize that perhaps this is what it means to love someone like him: to endure the ache of unreciprocated feelings, to bear the burden of knowing that you will always be nothing more than a background character in the grand canvas of his life.

And in that realization, a part of you begins to let go, allowing the lingering dream of Ratio to fade into the gray Parisian skies, leaving only the quiet, empty ache behind.

I TRIED MY BEST!! I HOPE U LIKED IT THO!! 🤧😭🫶

[luckyythirteen]

Hi, I hope it's okay to yap about Wesker and Willsker, if you don't like that or you prefer questions I am sorry 😅 but I just came across your account and I liked it :3

I learned about Wesker by Dead by Daylight and I liked his style and voice XD then I started to look up RE lore (only knew of the live Action movies, I never watched them but I knew it's Zombie stuff)

And tbh he's a piece of sh*t but his story, his style, the stuff he sometimes says ("Oh, Chris, little fishy, come see my hook") and his flamboyance are really entertaining

And when I learned that THIS egoistic guy had an actual friend I was pleasantly surprised!! Tbh they are kinda a comfort ship for me... Two evil dudes and lab partners and no one else can stand them XD I would love to see more canon stuff about their relationship... But I am sure RE devs etc will focus on other stuff :( I guess I have to check out A03 (if I were Capcom I would make more Wesker and Birkin centric stuff.. But I do not think it would turn out well but I am often interested in stories the actual writers aren't interested in XD) but Umbrella school or Arklay Labs stories would be great...

Some stuff about them as teenagers :3

(and this Rebecca pic sh*t is really annoying af tbh I try to ignore that, it's stupid unfunny and unnecessary jokes and humor by the devs and it never plays a role in canon, I hope it stays that way, keeping it in the remake was also disgusting and unnecessary🙄 I just stay in my bubble where they do not joke about it and show actual interest in Wesker and his canonically meaningful relationships :))

Feel free to yap about wesker! I 100% second all of this. His flamboyant personality and straight up goofy villainous nature intrigues me. Willsker will be my #1 ship with him I loved doomed toxic unrequited love 🗣🗣🗣 !! I'm disappointed a lot of Wesker stuff within the fandom is just thirsting, which I get it, he's a hot guy and everyone creams their pants over him lmao. But like he genuinely has such an interesting backstory, but Capcom dropped the ball on elaborating anything regarding it. Just "Oh yeah btw Wesker is actually a human trafficking victim who was indoctrinated into a cult and groomed to have these ideals! That's half the reason why he's so fucked up. Oh, you want us to elaborate on that? Fuck you he's dead LOL". which is lame as hell like you can't just drop that major bombshell then never go in depth?? It makes him a tragic character. It changes the whole fucking narrative with him bro, like I 100% think he should die in the end still but it spins him from "Oh look he's the mastermind of Umbrella and caused all this Just Because™️" to "Wesker is another victim of Umbrella and is perpetuating their ideals and never had control in all his life, he desires power and is driving himself mad trying to gain it. He has grown into the very thing he hates by trying to reclaim a semblance of control in his life after realizing he was a manufactured bioweapon." Bruh.

[leastdatablebracket]

ROUND 4, MATCH 2

Propaganda under the cut!

Shuu Iwamine

Propaganda

This damn partridge kills you CONSTANTLY, regardless if you romance him or not. One of them is literally at the START of the school year, he beheads you then uses your head to pilot this grotesque horror movie android thing! Completely unprompted, you can just die immediately! Horrible school doctor material, even worse boyfriend material, but alas, he's my favorite character.

[hatobf spoilers and also gore / violence kind of ?] he literally kills the mc in both of his endings, and in the true route he uses her best friend to kill her . and chops her body up and puts them in boxes to his student . and he puts her brain in a strange scarecrow machine . its insane hes so undateable man <//3

Decapitates protagonist and puts her head in a jar. Kills multiple other characters. Just generally an unpleasant person . My favorite character btw

He hates your species, sees you more as a science experiment than a romantic partner, and also kills you in his ending. Plus he has just, the worst attitude about the whole thing.

Bad End with him the government takes you out. "Good" end with him he cuts off your head, sticks it in a jar, and talks to it while on the run from the government. (Spoilers for hatoful BBL) True End of the whole game that ties up all the characters' stories, he kills you again but this time sends your head to your childhood best friend and takes your brain out to make basically robo-frankenstein. Was also an adult when the MC was a young child, and is the school nurse at MC's high-school. He's also a partridge. 

Literal birderer (bird murderer) 

It also turns out the (unrequited?) love of his life was the father of the MC's childhood friend. AND HE DOESN'T PULL ANY OF THIS SHIT WITH HIM. HE EVEN BECOMES A SLIGHTLY BETTER PERSON FOR HIM IN HOLIDAY STAR. It even turns out that everything thing he did in the true route of Hatoful Boyfriend was to fulfill a promise he made to that man on his deathbed (ALTHOUGHT RYOUTA'S FATHER NEVER ASKS HIM TO COMMIT ANY MURDERS, FATBIRD JUST THINKS MURDERS ARE A GREAT SOLUTION TO MANY PROBLEMS). So like, he's not just a murderous sadistic partridge who is also kind of a dick. He could not be one. Just NOT FOR YOU. OR ANYONE ELSE. JUST THIS ONE SPECIFIC PIGEON.

Solas

Propaganda

He believes all mortal beings deserve to die. He is bald but in a very unsexy way. He exudes zero chemistry and talking to him about romance is like talking to a boiled egg. 

Described by major media as "elf hitler," he dumps you to destroy the world

He is a smelly know it all, and that's before you find out he is a deity in disguise who caused the rift you spend the game trying to fix in the first place and he betrayed you and chopped off your hand

Breaks up with you, disappears without saying anything, plans to destroy the world

Look. I’ll admit I have not personally romanced solas. I am baffled that anyone would WANT to romance solas. I know we all love a waify little elf wizard with questionable motivations but jfc look at him like im trying not to say anything demeaning about bald dudes but he does not wear it well. Also iirc you can only romance him if you’re also an elf and then he’s weirdly rude and dismissive if your character is Into Elf Culture. Look im a huge lesbian but Iron Bull is RIGHT FUCKING THERE why would you do this.

[earl-grey-love]

Everyone in the office thinks that Emmett, my mad m. s/i, is in love with Joan. And that's true, since in S1 he spends all his time blatantly admiring her. (And for the rest of the show too). Including Joan, who does think he's lovely. But the thing is, he'd never fit into her ambitions. Major show spoilers btw.

Joan is chasing the "dream". Her idea of success is to get married to a handsome man who can provide for her, so she can leave the work place forever. This is what she wants more than anything. Emmett isn't able to do that for her. And they both know that, so there's no way she would ever choose him. No matter how much they may like each other.

Joan does go on to marry a man who does fit that bill. However, like all aspects of the american dream, it doesn't work out the way she thought it would. Especially not in a decade where society is starting to undergo a drastic change. Despite this, and the slight resentment Emmett has, he supports her through everything.

Meanwhile, he becomes best friends with Ken. They're similar but contrasting in the way Ken shamelessly flirts around while Em seems stuck on unrequited love, but they're both gentle creatives at their core. It's unclear exactly when Em falls in love with Ken, but it's likely sooner rather than later. Once again he fell for someone who won't want him, but he really doesn’t care.

This continues for a painfully long time (like 4 seasons!). It's a stalemate it seems until one day Ken abruptly discovers two things - 1, Em likes men, and 2, that Ken feels jealous of the guy he just saw him kiss. Cue gay panic and confusion. He eventually confronts Em about all of this and the two come to terms with the fact the feelings have been mutual for a very long time. Their exploration of their romantic attraction to each other begins.

Joan is one of the first, and only ones, to learn of this development. Since its the 60s, they go with the whole "roommates" thing as a cover, and cus they've always been close like that it goes unnoticed. Meanwhile, Joanie gets her divorce (and her baby), and she has a conversation with Em about regrets. Namely that she wishes she had chosen him, which causes Em to get angry.

They have an open and honest conversation about their feelings about love and relationships. Joan realizes now that the only way she would be with someone again is if she really loves them, something which she's not sure she's ever experienced. And Em reveals he never cared about relationships or sex either way, and that he's never slept with Ken despite their romantic relationship. Em and Joan are just happy to have each other in their lives, even if their feelings aren't exactly romantic. Em did feel that way for her once, but the years have changed that. They both grew and moved on.

The series ends with Ken and Em supporting Joan in her new business and single motherhood. Em joins her company as creative director, and Ken continues his career as a writer. And they both help Ken adjust to going blind in one eye too.

[apopcornkernel]

trick or treat!! 🎃🦇 (btw i loved hearing about the backstory/historical aspects of your fav wip, i’m not even in the hsr fandom but it’s so interesting)

THANK YOU <33333

(i know it's literally november 3 but shhhhh, all soul's was just yesterday it still counts—)

anyways!! the next fic i wanna talk about is... also jingfu 😭😭😭 this is embarrassing

presenting: ✨ jingfu vegas wedding ✨

there was a time i got back into asoiaf and jaime/brienne, and there's this subgenre of jb fics where they get quickly married on the quiet isle for one reason or another! and i just got obsessed with this type of wedding, and then i got to thinking about vegas weddings, and then i imagined jingfu drunk and giggly and happy and my gdocs stood NO chance

what's great about jingfu is, as i hope to never stop reminding my readers, is that they're chinese living in a chinese setting wifh chinese culture. so you can't just throw them into an actual vegas wedding situation—china has its own wedding ceremonies and the luofu must have its own technological advancements in that area too! so long story short i had a lot of fun brainstorming the wedding rituals and how it would mesh with the luofu, how people would even discover a wedding has taken place considering chinese weddings CAN technically be done without witnesses if you're feeling quirky enough (like maybe legally it's not allowed but ive seen cdramas where they do the same thing so like. me 🤝 cdramas; ignoring things for dramatic flair), and generally just trying to write their world vividly enough that it doesn't feel like Vague American Fantasy Spaceship #2432

i do think i kinda succeeded!! and even if i didn't, well, in my head i can clearly visualize it and in the end this is a fic for ME and not for yall, sorry but i come first when it comes to my fanfic :P

also i wrote my thoughts on the au while we were out with paternal relatives eating hotpot, so of course their drunken wedding feast is hotpot. i couldn't resist

It was strange to see the General and Master Diviner drinking, and even stranger to see them drinking like they were racing to their graves.

At least it would be. Extenuating circumstances, Dan Heng art thy name.

i also really like these lines i giggle everytime! because i ship jingfu but i also ship jingheng in the pathetic unrequited pining old man jing yuan kinda way.... its hilarious how down bad jing yuan still is for dan heng/dan feng and so since i needed a catalyst for the drinking i used dan heng hehe

also i researched chinese constellations for this because i needed more drunk activities and i figured i could do one of those "laying on the grass and pointing at the stars" except ofc it's the luofu so that's synthetic grass and false stars and their stars are also different and it would be very weird to mention ursa major or something! so i had to do research </3 i swear the things i do for my craft

i don't know how to end this.... i guess here's another excerpt HAHAHA

Jing Yuan, thanks be to Lan, had left behind some of his formal clothes at her residence, which meant the two of them did not have to sneak all the way back to Exalting Sanctum just to nab the appropriate garments. If they had not been drunk, the journey from the gardens to her quarters would not have taken so long. Unfortunately: they were. Unfortunately: Jing Yuan was enamored with every flower that passed him by, and Fu Xuan was busy counting the number of off-color stones in the cobbled path.

They did still make it there. Eventually.

In one of Fu Xuan’s many closets were the robes they’d worn to Qixi-jie—his a simple but elegant grey trimmed with white, and hers a dainty pink, complete with a round embroidered fan. Fu Xuan took Jing Yuan’s out, shoved it into his arms, and then shoved him out. He staggered out into the hallway, and then turned to blink at her, lost.

Fu Xuan rolled her eyes. “Well? What are you waiting for?”

“Oh,” Jing Yuan said. The light came back into his eyes. “Oh! Yes.”

Stupid, she thought, and closed the door. But apparently she’d said it out loud, because he yelled, muffled, “You’re the one marrying me!”

“I won’t if you don’t shut up!” Fu Xuan yelled back.

Immediate silence.

thank you for the ask again hehehe <3

[dhr-ao3]

A Puppet on a String

A Puppet on a String https://ift.tt/QlWpxSZ by pixydustworld “Do you want to live?” “Yes.” She was still spitting, still ready to kill him. But truthful, too. Never lucky, but always clever and bright. If he wanted to free her to soothe the ache in his unredeemable soul, she would let him. “I do.” Malfoy grinned. Soft and slow, like the sunrise, like the beginning of something wonderful and terrible. “Good.” He said. “That, I can work with.” And then: “Give me your hand.” Words: 4937, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 6 of slowly at first, and then all at once Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Explicit Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con Categories: F/M Characters: Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Daphne Greengrass, Theodore Nott Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy Additional Tags: Dubious Consent, Loss of Virginity, virginity auction, Sexual Slavery, Explicit Sexual Content, Alternate Universe - Voldemort Wins, but he ALSO is dead!, Public Sex, surprise! they liked each other all along! how mortifying, author blatantly ignores that there needs to be a third person to do a unbreakable vow, Death, Angst, Mentions of Suicide, Cunnilingus, not TECHNICALLY dead dove (the dove is on life support btw) but i will tag to be safe, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, unrequited love? not anymore!, Hermione is biter, Death Eaters, daphne greengrass says: my sister was NICE and she is also DEAD via AO3 works tagged 'Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy' https://ift.tt/FBNdo4A February 16, 2024 at 08:17AM

[cornerihaunt]

i love angst in fics btw. my friend thought i was insane when i complained to her that the ao3 tag for unrequited love actually included the “actually not unrequited love” tag (which was the majority). i’m like yeah i want the insane A gets rejected by B. the unresolved pining. the ruined friendship. LOVE THAT SHIT

[loganslefttit]

ARO FOLKS I NEED YOUR WISDOM

Could it be that I'm aro?

I visited this site cause I realized (3 months in my first serious relationship. I'm 20yo btw) that being in a relationship makes me anxious and uncomfortable. I thought I could have commitment issues (and I'm going to start going to therapy this monday, can I hear a wahoo?) but suddenly I thought that maybe I'm aromantic.

Here are my responses to every item of the list that site has of common experiences of aro people.

Imagining your future

Marriage/a long term romantic relationship feels more like an obligation rather than something you want and are excited for. ✅

Feeling like your ideal future involves living with friends (or alone) with no romantic partner in sight. ✅ (Imagining myself married feels so off lmao)

You imagine what it would be like to have someone be in love with you, but never what it would be like for you to feel that way for that person.✅ (I thought this one was a maybe but yeah, i did that lmao)

Your “fantasies” of future romantic relationships, if you have them, aren’t really fleshed out or detailed at all.✅

You assume you will be in a romantic relationship someday but aren’t excited for it.✅

If you imagine a future partner, you struggle to picture details about them.✅

Friends with benefits seems like the ideal relationship to you.❔(maybe? Idk because since i'm demisexual... but I've definitely fantasized about being fwb with my actual partner)

Media

You hated romantic subplots in children cartoons/stories.❔(not hated them, just didn't care about it)

You loved friendship arcs in children cartoons/stories.✅

You’re favorite characters growing up never had romance as a major aspect of their character.✅

You love reading romantic stories/fan-fiction, but have no interest in actively pursuing one yourself.✅

You’re generally disinterested in romance stories. ❔(Idk because I like them but I definitely prefer erotic stories)

You assumed that crushes and romantic drama were made up for soap operas and romcoms. ✅ (until I saw real relationships full of drama and I thought they were being stupid but turns out it DOES happen irl lmao)

Being in romantic relationships

You’ve been in romantic relationships, but you’ve always felt like you were acting or playing a role in them.✅ (I agreed to a relationship with my prev ”boyfriend” out of spite lmao)

You’ve felt uncomfortable and suffocated in romantic relationships even though those relationships were seemingly healthy and happy. ✅ (He's just like me fr)

You accidentally said yes to a date because you thought your friend was asking to hang out.❌ (Not really because since people seem to think I'm flirting when I'm just being nice, I started thinking that people being nice to me were hitting on me too so I avoided them LMAOO)

Understanding others crushes and romance

You’ve looked up what a crush is supposed to feel like.✅ (So confused about what I'm feeling lmao)

Once you learnt about asexuals who are romantic you got super confused thinking “isn’t romance just friendship + sex?”.✅

Once you learn about polyamory you got confused because you thought romance was defined by some sort of exclusivity.✅

Romantic relationships seem constructed of arbitrary rules you could never understand.✅

You’ve never understood the difference between a best friend and a romantic partner.✅

Celebrity crushes make no sense to you.✅ (But that could be my demisexual side speaking lmao)

When you realized people actually want to act on their crushes you were shocked.✅ (YES-- I wasn't going to tell my partner I liked him, I just didn't want to regret doing nothing but now I regret doing it LMAO)

Whenever people described a crush it sounded like discomfort or a panic attack to you.✅

You never understood people being sad about unrequited feelings. After all, couldn’t they just flip their crush feelings off? ❌(No, what I don't understand is people that NEED to be in relationships)

You never understood the trope of friends with benefits vowing not to develop feelings and then the drama when one of them seemingly inevitably does. ❔ (I don't really read that kind of stories, but I do get it, I've talked about jealousy and love with a lot of people, but Idk)

Your ‘crushes’

You think you’ve had a crush on every single one of your friends.✅ (SO TRUE)

You frequently thought you might have crushes on people you actually were uncomfortable around. ❔

You *theoretically* wanted a romantic partner but anytime anyone showed interest in you you would avoid them.✅ (SO TRUE HOLY FUCK)

You’ve only ever had feelings for someone if they showed interest in you first.✅(THIS ONE IS SO TRUE )

You’ve only ever had crushes on celebrities, fictional characters or otherwise unattainable people that you knew could never actually turn into relationships.✅

When asked about your crush you would randomly and arbitrarily pick a person.❌ (I just said no lmao)

You came up with a list of things you would probably like in a partner and then found someone who fit those criteria and decided to have a crush on them. ❌(Not at all, I don't even have a type, but I've decided to be in a relationship with my actual partner because we've been friends for years and he seemed to be the perfect match for me so I thought “I don't have to waste an opportunity”).

Flirting

You’re oblivious to people flirting with you. ❌ (Sometimes yeah, but most of the time I confuse them being nice with them flirting with me because of the next item in the list...)

You’ve been told you were flirting with someone when you thought you were just being friendly.✅ (All the damn time, for a couple of months I stopped being nice because of THIS reason)

Understanding and explaining yourself

You thought you were bisexual/pansexual because there was no difference in how you felt about people, so you assume you’re romantically feeling the same for everyone.✅ (Pan and demi)

When someone asks you why you don’t date, you reply that you have more important things to concentrate on.✅

You thought the reason you’ve never had a crush or fallen in love was because you had super high standards.✅(no one seemed to make me feel in love like everyone describes what it feels like)

You thought you were a late bloomer and that eventually you’d experience some inkling romance long after most of your peers have started dating.✅

So that's the list. Now I'm asking aro folks if you're so nice to tell me, do you relate? Could it be that I'm aro, or could it be that I just have commitment issues? LMAO either way i'm talking about this with my therapist, but I'd love to hear your opinions.

[ohsomanylovelywords]

(Kyoru) Momiji POV - Worth the Heartbreak

Kyo’s staring at Tohru, entranced as she completes the mundane task of folding laundry. It’s sweet, sickeningly sweet. I kind of feel like I’m going to throw up, to be completely honest. Instead, I put on an exaggerated smile and wrap an arm around Tohru. I want to be a little possessive, just this once. “Tohru, you work too hard. Let’s get away from grumpy Kyo and go for a walk.”

Kyo scowls, playing the part, but breaks into an easy smile, ruffling my hair. “Have fun, you two,” he calls, as we walk out. I’m not even a threat. 

Tohru turns to me and smiles, her eyes focused solely on mine. “Where to today, Momiji-kun?” It’s a completely harmless, platonic question, but she asks it like it’s the most important question in the world, like I’m the most important person in her world right now. Even if it’s just right now. 

“There are so many pretty flowers in bloom right now, so let’s go on a mission to collect them all!” 

She smiles again, pleased with the idea. “We could make a bouquet for everyone,” she decides excitedly. I return her smile with one of my own.

We walk along the path for at least half an hour, adding flowers to our collection and talking animatedly about the weather, the shape of the clouds, whatever catches our attention.

“Oh!” Tohru exclaims. “That flower is just like Kyo-kun’s hair.” I stare at the orange flower and concede to the truth in that statement. 

Adding a few of the flowers to our basket, I continue walking until I spot a row of delicate yellow flowers along the path.

Threading them into a flower crown, I place them on her head. “You look beautiful,” I say easily. Tohru blushes at the compliment. She sees the world as beautiful, but she rarely sees it in herself.

I make a flower crown for myself, freeing my hands. “You look cute, too, Momiji-kun!” 

I smile and hold her hand as we walk back. She squeezes my hand, and comments on a rabbit-shaped cloud in the sky. As we walk, the clouds shift above us. Tohru doesn’t notice and I don’t point it out. But the long bunny ears have become shorter and the rabbit cloud has grown a tail.

We turn a corner and Shigure’s house is in view. I know days like this won’t last forever. I have limited time. Days, maybe weeks until they figure out what we all already know. “Do you want to go out again tomorrow?” 

Maybe minutes. Tohru doesn’t answer. She’s staring at the house. Kyo’s lounging on the porch, unaware. “Tohru-kun?” 

The question startles her. “Sorry, Momiji-kun, what did you say?”

I wave off her concern. “Nothing. I’m just excited to be spending time with you.” 

She turns to me fully and smiles yet again. My heart wants to burst from the warmth in that smile. 

Kyo greets us before we even reach the door. “Nice flowers,” he comments.

“Do you want a flower crown, too?” Tohru asks, clearly worried he feels left out. Kyo chuckles and touches hers lightly. “No, I don’t think that’d suit me.”

“No?” Tohru says, with the slightest disappointment. Taking off my own flower crown, I start to hand it to Kyo. “Wait,” she exclaims, but my hope vanishes a second later. Reaching into the bouquet, she adds the orange flower to the crown. It completely overpowers the smaller yellow ones. 

Kyo looks slightly put out, but places it on his head and looks to her for approval. She smiles with delight. “Perfect.” Embarrassed, he blushes and smiles back, not quite staring back at her. Neither notice I’ve walked away, but I smile and wave goodbye anyhow.

I don’t have a chance, and I know it. But a smile and a heart like that is worth the heartbreak.

Update: Decided to turn this into a series of drabbles from multiple character perspectives on Ao3.

[ladyluscinia]

Who are all of these people who are drowning in pro-Izzy content to the exclusion of all other characters and have they been in a fandom that actually has a ridiculous overrepresentation of some shitty guy? I see posts like this:

And the problem sounds a lot more like they are objecting to any Izzy content. Because I certainly can't find this overwhelming dominance. So fine. Let's see how popular Izzy is...

There are 12072 OFMD works on AO3 as I type this.

"Israel Hands" is character tagged in 5393 of them. That's 44.7%. Lower than I would expect, seeing as that includes every fic where he's the choice of villain as well as simply present or a focus. 122 of those are tagged "Major Character Death" (out of 225 in the whole fandom), and I suspect that's undertagged by people who don't think Izzy's fate is that important.

Comparably we have Lucius at 3560 (29.5%), Jim at 2226 (18.4%), and Oluwande at 1935 (16%). Lower than Izzy, yeah, but how many of those Lucius fics have him tagged just to get violently killed off or verbally wrecked and sent away for everyone else's happy ending? How many times does the crew show up untagged individually? I'm guessing the numbers of positive fics are probably a lot more equal... But let's see if we can look at this another way.

How about ships?

Izzy's ship fics are probably more likely to be pro-Izzy / significant content, yeah? So I'll break those down.

The most popular ship in the "Israel Hands" character tag is - to no one's surprise - BlackBonnet at 3183 (so 59% of "Israel Hands" character tagged fics, and 26.4% of all OFMD fics are tagged BlackBonnet + "Israel Hands"). I'd guess that number includes a lot of the "villain Izzy getting defeated" stories. Ships that actually have Izzy in them go:

Edward/Izzy at 1287 under "Israel Hands", 1374 (11.4%) total

Stede/Edward/Izzy at 762 under "Israel Hands", 812 (6.7%, probably with a good amount of BlackHands overlap) total

Stede/Izzy at 482 under "Israel Hands", 509 (4.2%, with overlap again) total

Izzy/Lucius at 477 under "Israel Hands", 514 (4.3%) total.

Lucius/Pete btw? 746 under "Israel Hands", 1188 (9.8%) total. Oluwande/Jim has 579 under "Israel Hands" and 1023 (8.5%) total. They both outrank every non-Edward/Izzy ship inside Izzy's tag, and are not far behind Edward/Izzy in total.

Another consideration I can attest to as a BlackHands reader... a lot of those Edward/Izzy fics are labeled "one sided" in various ways (which gets tag wrangled as the ship). 107 are just plain tagged "Unrequited Love". 94 have "One-Sided Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Israel Hands". Or they are toxic / abusive with a different ship endgame - BlackBonnet (tagged on 656 of them, with 389 as SteddyHands) or Izzy/Lucius (tagged on 70) or a negligible ship like Izzy/Frenchie or Izzy/Sam Bellamy.

These numbers are just NOT an overwhelming surge of fan attention. Izzy is not a third protagonist, no, but he's the most developed antagonist with easily 3rd or 4th most screentime / characterization. Having maybe 1/5 or less of the fandom content that you could call "focused" on him is not much or unusual or proof of bias 🙄 (the tag "Israel Hands-centric" is on 341 fics, or 2.8% of OFMD fics, "POV Israel Hands" on 176 so 1.5%, "Soft Israel Hands" on 107 or 0.9%... These are not big numbers).

Do people want to know where all that attention they think is owed to Jim or Lucius or Frenchie or Ivan and Fang is going?

8705 works tagged as BlackBonnet. That's 72.1% of all OFMD fics. Running the "otp: true" search for BlackBonnet ONLY fics pulls up 5764 results, so still 47.7%! Almost half of this fandom's content is ship fic that only covers the OTP without even tagged background ships.

"Blackbeard | Edward Teach" is character tagged in 9698 OFMD fics at 80.3% and "Stede Bonnet" is next in 8889 at 73.6%.

In the 1188 Lucius/Pete fics, BlackBonnet is tagged in 936 of them. That's 78.8% of all Lucius/Pete.

In the 1023 Oluwande/Jim fics, BlackBonnet is tagged in 788 of them. That's 77% of all Oluwande/Jim.

Those BlackBonnet numbers are insane. Fucking Destiel - the biggest ship on AO3, in a show insanely hostile to side characters - is tagged in 107526 fics of 268568 in the Supernatural fandom. That's 40%. You read that right. Less than half. Maybe some more recent tumblr darlings?

Catra / Adora from She-Ra hit 10248 out of 16141, so 63.5%. And they are canon.

Newer, but I've seen Dream / Hob Gadling surging and it's at roughly 500 (the tags need wrangling) out of 1743 in the Sandman (TV 2022), hitting 28.7%

Never watched The Owl House, but Amity Blight / Luz Noceda is the top ship at 7650 of 16277, so 47%. Pretty sure that one is canon too.

Stranger Things has 51424 works, with top ships Steve/Eddie at 10266 (20%) and Billy/Steve at 9046 (17.6%). Again, I don't watch, but I'm pretty sure these are a lot more accurate examples of minor character takeover ships, and Billy especially is the shitty white guy breakout with barely any screentime. Who has been dead for multiple seasons. And it's still beating Edward/Izzy's percentage significantly.

I'm sorry that your fave isn't getting the content you want. It sucks. But this supposed unfair focus on Izzy just does not exist at any level that would actually be impacting other character content.

Anyone complaining about it is not making a complaint about fandom bias grounded in reality.

And anyone who is proposing "solutions" for this lack of content (a questionable proposition already) better have the bulk of their list as "More BlackBonnet writers need to try branching out" or they are just making up reasons to complain about minor content focused on a character or ship they don't like.

[al-lewinsky]

i really need to date with intention when i get back into the scene again

[jjacob]

all i want for christmas is you

❝ the school had started to take notice of you. lee juyeon, however, had always noticed. ❞

PAIRING ▸ lee juyeon x fem!reader (ft. best friend!lee minho)

GENRES ▸ fluff, high school au, sports au, best friends to lovers au

WARNINGS ▸ mild profanity but !! lots of !! fluff !! 

SUMMARY ▸ the bet was simple: find a date to the winter ball. the only problem was that juyeon didn’t want just any girl. he wanted you.

PLAYLIST ▸ all i want for christmas is you by mariah carey

WORD COUNT ▸ 5055 words

AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ merry christmas! this is a gift for addy @honeyju​ the biggest juyeon simp ik !! ily addy i am excited/scared/not emotionally ready to read the minho one which ! btw y’all should read here bc our stories are loosely connected! also disclaimer: i know jack shit ab football but i tried

LEE JUYEON TENDED TO REGRET HALF THE THINGS HE SAID SOMETIMES. 

In eighth grade, Juyeon’s sense of humor was largely self-deprecating and consisted of saying he wanted to die at the slightest inconvenience. But, with his spectacular timing, he let the joke slip in front of a teacher once and froze up upon seeing her concerned expression. Juyeon later received a note from the counselor’s office and had to convince them that he was perfectly fine.

In tenth grade, Juyeon had grown past his phase of dark humor and moved onto high school football. He made the cut for the team the previous year, and managed to make it on the varsity team by the time he was a sophomore. In the beginning of the season, they asked who wanted to be captain the next year, and Juyeon boldly declared that he did. Thus, he was ridiculed and sentenced to pick up balls and clean up the gym after every practice from then on.

Now, as a high school junior in the varsity football team, Juyeon had screwed himself over by making a stupid bet with his best friend, Lee Minho.

Lee Minho was, in short, a conniving bastard. Juyeon never should have trusted him and gone along with his antics. The mere thought of what he had gotten himself into was enough to send his heart into overdrive.

The bet sounded simple enough: find a date to the Winter Ball.

Of course, it was easier said than done, but Juyeon was a star athlete and had girls sliding in his DMs left and right. He could easily find a date if he wanted to, and, honestly, Juyeon only needed to send a few texts and he would probably be secured for the dance. The problem was, however, that Juyeon only wanted you.

Minho was well aware of Juyeon’s pitiful, unrequited love towards you. It was probably the reason he suggested the bet; his best friend either wanted to see him miserable or see him score a chance with you. Either way, Juyeon wasn’t sure his heart was ready to shoot his shot.

Juyeon had crushed on you ever since you sat next to him in the seventh grade and let him borrow your pencil. It was such a silly start to his admiration for you, but his feelings grew stronger when the both of you actually became friends. You were so bright when you laughed, so sweet when you spoke, and so adorable when you smiled. Juyeon had never felt this way about anyone else and always got butterflies when he saw you. Juyeon was never one to chase after girls but he would find himself constantly thinking about what you were up to and having several internal dilemmas over whether he should ask you to hang out or not.

Five years later and Juyeon still harbored feelings for you. Now, they had matured into something deeper, but you still racked his brain nevertheless. It didn’t help that you had a major glow-up in high school and were probably the most beautiful person Juyeon had ever seen.

The school started to take notice of you.

Juyeon, on the other hand, had always noticed.

“Are you sure we can finish a medium before practice?” Minho asked Juyeon, setting a box of pizza on the table in front of him. “Also, I saw Y/N by the gym earlier.”

Juyeon perked up. “Y/N?”

“Yeah,” Minho replied, grabbing a slice of pepperoni pizza for himself. “You know what day it is, right?”

Minho took a bite out of his pizza, observing Juyeon with a raised brow. His best friend was on the baseball team but treating themselves to pizza had become a monthly ritual. Despite being on different teams, he was closer to Minho than his football teammates.

“Thursday?”

“And that means?”

Right.

Juyeon had formulated an elaborate plan to ask you out during the football game today, but, of course, it all depended on whether their team won or not. It would have been kind of ridiculous to propose after a loss. On the bright side, he knew he could count on the fact that you’d actually be present considering you were a cheerleader.

But what if you already had a date? You surely hadn’t mentioned it to him or posted about it on social media, so he was riding on an assumption that you haven’t been asked. That was bizarre to Juyeon, though, because you were the prettiest person he had ever seen. However, it was true that you were gradually getting popular, and that made Juyeon a touch nervous.

“I ask her out tomorrow,” Juyeon breathed out. “Am I ready for this?”

Minho scoffed lightly. “Are you ever?”

Juyeon frowned at his best friend, scrunching up his nose at his distasteful comment. “What about you? Have you gotten a date?”

“That’s for me to know and you to find out.”

Juyeon sighed. That was probably all he would get out of Lee Minho today. Once Minho set his mind on something, he carried it out diligently until the end. Juyeon honestly had no idea who he wanted to bring since Minho didn’t like talking about girls he was interested in, but he supposed it wasn’t that big of a deal as long as his best friend was happy.

It wasn’t like Juyeon was never going to hear about his friend’s endeavors. After all, he did pick up on Minho’s slow descent from an apathetic individual to a whipped ball of fluff. If Juyeon mentioned that to his best friend, however, he would probably be ridiculed for consistently being whipped for you since the seventh grade.

Juyeon nearly jumped out of his seat at the sound of his ringer going off. He scrambled to pull his phone out of his pocket, ignoring Minho’s teasing smirk at the sight of his frazzled self.

y/n: hey :) i’m gonna drop off some gingerbread cookies my mom made after practice so lmk when i can come over

Juyeon must have saved a country in a past life for this kind of luck.

juyeon: i love your mom’s cookies. you can come over whenever you’d like

y/n: how about we walk home together after practice?

juyeon: sounds good to me

Now, the pizza was starting to make his mouth water, but if you were walking home with him, Juyeon was ready to drop it and run to see you even though he loved pizza. But Juyeon loved you more than he loved pizza, and he believed that was true love.

“She made me cookies,” Juyeon announced.

“She made you cookies,” Minho repeated, leaning forward in surprise.

“Well, her mom did, but yeah.”

Minho turned his attention back to his pizza. “So this is about your mommy kink again.”

“I don’t have a fucking mommy—why would you say that?” Juyeon cried out, kicking his friend’s shin under the table.

“You don’t? Last time I checked, she was making dinner in the kitchen when I came over yesterday.”

“I’m talking about the kink!”

Yet, even a silly back-and-forth with Minho couldn’t get Juyeon down from his high over you. He was still processing the fact that you were going to walk home with him and, if Juyeon played his cards right, maybe he could get a feel of how comfortable you would be if he asked you out during the game tomorrow.

Minho snickered. “You look happy.”

Juyeon couldn’t even mask his lovesick smile and flushed cheeks. He folded his arms on the table in front of him and buried his face in them, his head spinning at the thought of you.

“Shut up, Minho.”

The only problem with you being on the cheerleading team was that you were extremely distracting.

Juyeon was the star quarterback and frankly, it was kind of pathetic that the one thing that kicked him in the ass was seeing you in the knee socks and pom-poms. It didn’t help that you were a flyer so Juyeon’s stomach pitted with anxiety whenever he saw you being thrown up and whenever he heard a scream coming from the direction of the cheerleaders.

Today was different, though. Juyeon could care less about the screams and falls from the corner of the field. All he could think about was you and how he was going to ask you out. If his plan was going to work, it was going to draw a lot of attention and be quite embarrassing if it failed.

All of his confidence got knocked down with a single sweep when he saw someone asked you to the dance.

One of the cheerleaders broke into a fit of giggles at the sight, clasping a hand over her mouth. “Oh my god!”

You were frozen stiff, an awkward smile on your face as the guy walked onto the field with a sign and about a dozen roses. Juyeon could feel his heart sinking to the ground with each step the guy took, with each second his smile grew brighter.

“Is he seriously confessing during practice?” Sohn Youngjae asked, brows furrowed as he rested his arm on Juyeon’s shoulder. “That’s real brave.”

“What’s his deal doing it here? He isn’t even on the team,” Juyeon said, coming off more bitter than he had expected.

Younghoon scoffed. “It’s a bold move. He must be confident that Y/N’s going to say yes.”

Juyeon squared his shoulders. He was conflicted with the swell of anger and deflation of you possibly being taken, but nevertheless, all he could do was watch helplessly as you were being asked out. From where they were on the field, Juyeon couldn’t hear much, but he could see your reactions quite well. The wolf-whistles and cheers were pissing him off, but he was fixed on you.

He turned to look towards Minho, who was practicing on the field adjacent to theirs. His best friend met his gaze immediately like they had some form of exclusive telepathic communication. Minho nodded towards you and raised a brow, as if nudging Juyeon to go interrupt them. That, however, was something he was far too cowardly to bring himself to do.

Your voice resounded clearer than Juyeon had expected.

“I’m really sorry,” you apologized sincerely, ducking your head and keeping your hands entwined behind you. “I’m not interested, but I do appreciate the gesture.”

Juyeon felt a weight lift off of his chest. He wasn’t sure if he should’ve felt relieved that you shot him down or nervous that you rejected an attractive, confident guy who clearly liked you. However, he soon had no time to mull over that when the guy’s reaction was getting more aggressive than crestfallen.

“Y/N, I asked you out in front of all these people,” he said with a distasteful laugh. “Are you seriously rejecting me right now?”

“Sorry, I just don’t want to go with you,” you replied firmly, voice dropping as you became more conscious of your surroundings. “I’m sorry it had to be public but you didn’t really give me a choice.”

For a split second, Juyeon wondered how he could still hear you when you were practically muttering at this point, and then he realized that he started walking to you without even realizing. His feet carried him unknowingly, hand balled at his side and eyes stony and trained on the guy.

“You could’ve just accepted it and told me later that you didn’t want to go with me,” he said with a scoff. “It’s like you enjoy humiliating others publicly.”

Your teammates rushed forward to argue and fend him off while you opened your mouth to protest, but Juyeon was faster, moving in front of you so he was head-to-head with the guy.

“She said she’s not interested,” he said with a threatening undertone, wondering where he managed to muster up the courage to be this assertive.

You were visibly shocked by Juyeon’s actions, and he couldn’t even blame you because he was equally just as surprised as you were. Yet, all he could do was glare daggers down at the other guy with steely eyes and frown until he backed off.

“Thanks,” you said softly once the guy had left.

Juyeon was flustered by all the girls giggling behind you but was amazed by how cool and collected you remained despite that. He turned to you, eyes softening and shoulders relaxing. He knew he was getting an earful about this from his teammates after practice and most definitely from Minho as well.

“No problem,” Juyeon replied, cheeks red. “He was bothering you. I couldn’t just ignore it.”

“That was really sweet of you, Juyeon.” You bit back a smile and suggested, “Meet you at the front gates after practice?”

“See you then.”

Even though Juyeon could’ve spent the rest of practice talking to you, he sprinted back as fast as he could because his cheeks were only getting redder as the cheerleaders gushed about what he did for you. He could hear their gossip and whispering even as he was running back to his team. Juyeon was positive he wouldn’t escape the embarrassment, though, because Lee Jaehyun was smirking at him when he got back.

“You’re blushing, dude.”

Juyeon shoved him.

There was a universal law that was newly decreed. It read: Lee Minho shall never text, call, or speak to Lee Juyeon whenever Y/N was around.

The reason for that being the fact that Juyeon was easily embarrassed and Minho’s texts were not helping his case. He felt it was rude enough to check his phone while he was walking with you, but every time he saw a notification flash, his eyes widened with sheer distress over Minho’s texts.

minho: like three people asked me if you and y/n are fucking bc of what you pulled during practice today

minho: wait are y’all fucking and just not telling me

minho: i knew it was sus that she was coming over to your house

juyeon: fake news!! stop making me feel shy :(

Juyeon decided he had enough Lee Minho for today and turned off his phone.

“That was honestly the coolest thing I’ve ever seen you do,” you gushed to Juyeon as you walked home with him, fingers looped around the straps of your backpack. “Way cooler than you punting footballs.”

“No need to flatter me,” Juyeon replied coolly but his shy smile and red-tipped ears said otherwise. “That guy was being unnecessarily aggressive.”

“His proposal was out of nowhere!” you exclaimed. “I don’t get what he expected me to do.”

Juyeon smiled through the pain. Lord, give me strength, he prayed to whatever divine power was out there.

“Are you not interested in having a date to the dance then?” Juyeon asked, looking down at you curiously.

You paused for a moment and Juyeon thought his heart would stop in anticipation for your answer. Come to think of it, he had never seen you go to a school dance with a date before. You were always with your friend group. It wouldn’t be out of the ordinary to see you stick with them, but Juyeon was hoping he could change that.

“Well,” you started, “if the right person asked me then I wouldn’t be opposed.”

Juyeon couldn’t exactly read your smile but it made him want to faint. The rest of the walk back home was spent talking about school and football, but Juyeon couldn’t get your answer to his question out of his head. He even walked past his house because his head was so full of you, resulting in you needing to stop him and tell him that they had already reached his place.

“Y/N! It’s so good to see you!” Juyeon’s mom chirped with a good-natured smile. “How has your mom been?”

Juyeon’s eyes widened upon the realization that they never stopped by at your place first to get the cookies. He opened his mouth to interject but you went on to answer.

“She’s been great, Mrs. Lee,” you replied, smiling just as big, and pulled out a box of cookies from your bag. “She wanted me to give these to you.”

“That’s so sweet! Give her my thanks,” his mom replied and opened the door wider once she accepted the cookies. “Come in for some tea, will you?”

Juyeon was practically frozen at the doorway while you were taking off your shoes and walking inside. If you had the cookies with you this entire time, then why didn’t you just give them to him to take home himself? Unless you were worried about the courtesy, it was a bit out of your way to take the time to walk home with Juyeon to deliver them.

“Juyeon, what are you doing out there?” his mom asked. “Come inside. It’s cold.”

“Right.”

Having you over at his house wasn’t exactly the sparkly fantasy that Juyeon thought it would be.

He was getting quite jealous of your mom hogging all of your attention. It wasn’t like you and Juyeon drifted apart during high school, so he wasn’t sure why his mom had to pull you away from him and have her own conversation with you. The worst part was that Juyeon couldn’t even join in on the conversation. He had no idea what they were even talking about.

That is, until his mom brought up the dance.

“Do you have a date, Y/N?” Juyeon’s mom asked.

“I don’t,” she replied. “I usually just go with my friends.”

“You’re so pretty, though,” Mrs. Lee tutted. “I’m sure someone must’ve asked you out.”

“Actually, someone asked me today,” you said. There was a moment of silence as you looked over at Juyeon while his gaze bore into yours. For a moment, you were struggling for what to say, mouthing words that weren’t being processed. Juyeon rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly once you regained your composure. “Juyeon actually helped me out.”

Mrs. Lee straightened up. “My son did?” She looked amused as she turned to Juyeon.

“Yeah,” you answered, grinning. “He was really cool.”

Juyeon blushed darkly once their eyes were on him. “W-what? I couldn’t ignore it. I wasn’t even doing that much. I was just helping out. You know, being a decent person,” he rambled and stood up. “Anyways, isn’t it getting late? Mom, Y/N has to go home soon and it’s gonna be pitch black outside if you keep her here.”

“Oh, you’re right.” Mrs. Lee frowned as she peered out the window. “Juyeon, you walk her home then.”

“What?” he sputtered out, looking between you and his mom before he caved, muttering, “I’ll go get my jacket.”

After an exchange of goodbyes, you had stepped out of the house and waited while Juyeon was slipping his shoes on. There was a moment of struggle where he had tied his laces too tight and couldn’t get the shoe on but he managed to slip it on after a few seconds of internal screaming. Juyeon zipped up his jacket the moment he stepped outside, the brisk coldness making his goosebumps rise.

“You really don’t have to walk me back,” you told Juyeon. “It’s cold outside.”

“It’s really late,” Juyeon replied, rubbing his hands together in hopes that the friction would provide some heat. “You shouldn’t be walking home by yourself, and I really don’t mind.”

“Thanks,” you mumbled, ducking your face. “For this, for what you did during practice—everything.”

Juyeon was glad that you weren’t looking at him because his mouth was opening and closing over and over again like a fish. He was also thankful for the fact that he could blame the dust of pink across his cheeks on the cold winter bite. Unfortunately, you lived close by so Juyeon didn’t have time to come up with a cool response and he didn’t want to leave things like this. There was a good vibe going on and he was upset that he couldn’t act upon it; when it came to you, Lee Juyeon was a coward.

“Um, we’re here so…” Juyeon trailed off when he turned to you, sort of thrown off by how beautiful you looked with your windswept hair and flushed cheeks. Dazed, he reached forward and moved a strand of your hair out of your face. “It’s good I walked you home and you’re not like, lost or… something—I’ll shut up now.”

You laughed, and it was an octave higher as if you were rattled from him touching your hair. “Ah, yes, a few streets down can be a harrowing trek.”

Juyeon laughed with you before his eyes settled on you. Your hands were crossed, rubbing your arms that were prickled with goosebumps. A wave of guilt washed through Juyeon and led him to strip his jacket off immediately. He ignored the piercing chill and put his jacket around your shoulders, making sure they covered your bare arms.

“My house is right here,” you argued. “You’re going to be cold.”

“Keep it on. I have something to tell you after the game,” Juyeon said firmly. It was his second burst of courage for you today and he was a little too amped up for his own good. “If you don’t like it then give me back my jacket tomorrow.”

Before you could respond, Juyeon turned on his heel and bolted home, the biggest grin across his face because he was head-over-heels for you.

Juyeon had never been so nervous in his life.

The game was underway, Juyeon’s leg bouncing as he eyeballed the scoreboard. His team was strong in the first two quarters, cutting it close by the third, but now they were neck-to-neck. They had ended with a tie and now they decided to go into overtime for the sake of choosing a winner for the game. It was a sudden death round so whoever scored first would win the game. Juyeon, however, found it difficult to concentrate.

Especially with Lee Minho breathing down his back.

“Are you ready?” his best friend asked.

“Yes—well, no, but I don’t really have a choice.”

“That’s true.”

“I already made the sign and told the team and everything,” Juyeon whined. “I really screwed myself over, Minho.”

Minho pushed at the back of his head. “Dude, I’m talking about the game.”

“Oh, that—that’s fine,” Juyeon stammered. “Fifteen minutes—we just have to win, and then I have to ask out the most amazing person I’ve ever met.”

“You could chicken out,” Minho suggested, “but that also comes with me never letting you live it down.”

“You see, I kind of already implied that I’m going to tell her something important.”

“You did?” Minho’s voice was somewhere between shocked and impressed.

“Shit, I gotta go,” Juyeon muttered, pushing himself off the bench. “Keep the poster safe for me!”

“Good luck, champ!”

Juyeon, sweaty and bangs sticking to his forehead, had to ignore every distraction and think about winning the game before his stomach threw itself into a pool of anxiety over asking you out. He got in a huddle with his team in the remaining fifteen seconds they had before they had to get in formation and lowered the facemask of his helmet. It was up to this one last play to determine whether they would win the game or not.

“Just like we practiced, alright?” Juyeon told them. “Double-wing power pass. We get them to bite thinking it’s a run play and then open up a passing lane.”

“Alright, let’s go,” Jaehyun cheered, and the rest of them put in their mouth guards and lowered their facemasks.

Juyeon took a shaky breath as he got in formation at the line of scrimmage. His heart was racing but he wasn’t sure it was about the game. Nevertheless, he steeled his nerves and held his ground. The whistle blew and the crowd was silent, observing the tension on the field carefully.

“Silver-80! Silver-80! Hut! Hut! Hike!” Juyeon yelled, and the center, Sangyeon, snapped the ball to him.

Juyeon faked a handoff to Jaehyun, the fullback, and spun around, rolling to his right. Changmin sped up in front of Juyeon to defend him. A smile tugged at Juyeon’s lips. Their plan was working just as he intended, but there was a problem: they couldn’t open up a passing lane for the running backs like he thought they would. The play was too rushed, so it wasn’t ever a guarantee.

So Juyeon had to do what he would normally deem crazy.

He spun at the sight of the other team coming to tackle him and skirted around the field, belting down the field. He dodged past another linebacker that tried to body him. His primary motivation was that he didn’t want a concussion before he confessed to you, but he assumed it was okay to admit that to himself as long as he didn’t throw the game.

Juyeon felt a hand grab him but he pushed forward, running across the goal line and into the end zone. He threw the ball down and cried out in joy as he scored a touchdown. The whistle blew and the scoreboard flipped. They won.

He did it.

Juyeon’s team ran to him, cheering at the top of their lungs. He was lifted up on Jaehyun and Younghoon’s shoulders, grinning happily before his heart sunk back down. The cheerleaders ran to the field, cheering and tossing their pom poms up. The crowd was roaring. Juyeon was realizing that he had to do the scariest thing that a heterosexual teenage boy ever had to experience.

“Jaehyun, Jaehyun,” Juyeon tapped his shoulder quickly. “We have no time. I have to do it now.”

“Oh shit.”

Jaehyun and Younghoon dropped Juyeon onto the turf. Juyeon winced at the sudden impact, gathering himself back to his feet and hoping you didn’t witness that. Jaehyun gave him a half-assed apology and pushed him forward to run and get his poster and flowers from Minho. Jaehyun then grabbed Changmin by the shoulders, urging him to go to the announcer’s booth.

Juyeon sprinted over to Minho, waving his hands dramatically. “Give, give, give,” he demanded amongst all the cheering.

Minho didn’t waste any time and pushed the poster and bouquet into Juyeon’s hands. “Break a leg, tiger.”

“Trust me, I nearly did.”

Juyeon jogged back onto the field, cheeks hot and head a little dizzy for what was about to come. He didn’t even tell his mom he was going to ask you out and she had to watch her son ask his best friend out to the dance. This was probably going to be a moment of utter humiliation but once Juyeon saw you in your high ponytail with a bright smile on your face, all that fear faded away and it was just you and him.

More importantly, you were wearing his jacket over your uniform and Juyeon felt like he was going to combust from the cuteness.

“Guys, guys,” Jaehyun called to the team. “Surround Juyeon. Make sure Y/N doesn’t see him.”

Juyeon’s heart was beating a hundred miles per second. He was glad he was running on the adrenaline from winning the game because otherwise, he would be cowering in fear and sweating buckets right now.

“Everyone, listen up!” Changmin spoke over the intercom. “First of all, the football team scored a major dub today—ow! Sunwoo, cut it out—alright, I’ll get to it!” Changmin broke from the mic and started bickering with Sunwoo.

There was a pause, and Juyeon was surprised to hear Minho’s voice fill the speakers, “Anyways, my buddy and our star quarterback, Juyeon, has something to say for a special someone.”

The crowd fell silent, a couple cheers and wolf-whistles as it was pretty obvious that a confession was about to happen.

“This is so fucking fluffy,” Sunwoo mumbled.

“Shut up, Sunwoo,” Juyeon replied, nudging him with his elbow.

The football team moved out of the way so that they weren’t huddled around Juyeon anymore. Juyeon’s breath caught in his throat as he walked forward to the middle of the field, holding up his sign, reading: Will you be my sunshine?

“Y/N,” he called out loudly, “honestly this confession is long overdue, but will you go to Winter Ball with me tonight and be my sunshine?”

The crowd started cheering and whistling again, and Juyeon wanted to die. She hadn’t even given him her answer yet and everyone was acting like she had agreed and they eloped. The cheerleaders pushed Y/N forward and she approached Juyeon, looking like a deer in headlights.

Juyeon took another shaky breath and continued, “I’ve been in love with you for so long so it would be an honor if I could take you to the dance,” he said and his voice dropped to a whisper. “I’m sorry if this is uncomfortable for you.”

You bit your lip but that wasn’t enough to contain the happiness that showed on your face. You zipped up Juyeon’s jacket and threw yourself into his arms. Everyone practically exploded but Juyeon was sure his heartbeat was louder. He wrapped his arms around you and buried his face into your shoulder.

Was this what people called a Christmas miracle?

“Oh shit!” Changmin screamed over the intercom. (“Shut up, they’re having a moment,” Minho’s faint voice was picked up in the background).

“Oh my god, you just made me the happiest man alive,” he mumbled.

You pulled back and reached forward to move his damp bangs off of his forehead. “Took you long enough.”

“Wait, did you—did you like me?” Juyeon choked out.

You laughed and cupped his face in your hands. There was a shaky inhale and exhale of breaths when his lips brushed against yours, and Juyeon closed the distance, kissing you like he was starved of your touch. His hold tightened on you as you melted into him, and then you both pulled away, smiling and dazed and lovesick.

You giggled. “Does that answer your question?”

“Yes,” he breathed out, grinning as he brushed his nose against yours.

Juyeon could care less about all the presents and holiday cheer because he had you and you were all he wanted.