#magnet implant
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Well, it's been almost 10 years with my magnet, but the time has come to say goodbye.
When I had this done, it was during the height of biohacking, as close to mainstream as it ever got. People were (and still are!) putting all sorts of things inside their bodies under questionable conditions to see what would happen. A lot of this stuff is easier to find now, in that I can do a quick search online to find a replacement should I want one, but also significantly more underground (no one is writing breathless articles in major news outlets about it). I guess that's the way internet communities work these days: easier to purchase something than to get detailed reviews of others' experiences.
A really quick pro/con list if you're considering getting a magnetic implant:
Pros
ability to sense electromagnetic fields in a limited way (unshielded lab equipment, mostly, ime) - my magnet is a dipole on the long ends, so it basically wiggles in a very limited arc in place and produces a buzzing sensation
can tell if something is magnetic or not (surprisingly handy)
can pick up small ferrous objects (both a solid party trick and useful if you do any sewing - basically all pins and needles are steel and can be lifted this way - also useful in dissection lab if someone dropped a scalpel blade)
Cons
can't get an MRI (which is why it has to come out)
occasionally painful - both in proximity to something VERY magnetic and just at random (the coating on the magnet is biosafe but the process of implantation means my fingertip has basically encapsulated it in a fibrous shell, which allows a tiny amount of movement/vibration and is how I experience the electromagnetic fields I can sense but ALSO sometimes it just pinches)
have to explain to absolutely baffled people, especially medical professionals, who experience no joy or whimsy
getting it actually put in hurts, and is effectively a minor surgery - please choose who you allow to do this wisely
Would I do it again? I think so, yeah! I might want to place it elsewhere for comfort reasons, but I'm going to miss my 6th sense. The mass of what I can lift has steadily decreased over time (a known problem), but is still impressive enough for party tricks.
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Halo really has people microchipped and has it be standard procedure that if you join the military you will likely get some kind of invasive brain surgery (GIANT METAL SPIKE) and this is a minor detail
#crab text#ever consider the possibilities of the neural implant?#and transcranial magnetic stimulation?#I'm gonna hold magnets up to skulls and start blasting
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What is the best metal ever and why is it titanium
#jay rambles about life.txt#architecture joint replacements implants prosthesis glasses frames architecture industrial plants etc etc AND non-magnetic and biocompatible#what can't she do
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what did they mean by this
#does that connect to the suit or his fucking nervous system#is it like magnetic cause there are no marks#did they implant actual metal wireless chargers into his back#do you think he can connect to bluetooth#beyblade#metal fight beyblade#beyblade metal masters#toby/faust#anyway this is me if you even care
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I need to update RE's design soon. Thinking about how his prosthetic should work
#he's got a futuristic arm but he deliberately asked for an older model he didn't want anything crazy#so its got to like. have more future-y elements but also leave something to be desired#i think I'm getting somewhere#the way it connects to his remaining limb is sort of a magnet clip thing#which means he is pretty committed to this prosthetic bc it would require surgery to change the connector#but there's probably a handful of models that use the same/similar enough connectors#if he were to need to replace it#it also isn't the most comfortable situation by far#he tends to not wear it unless he needs 2 hands for something really bad#cuz like its heavy. it pinches a little sometimes (skin is less predictable than metal and sometimes it squishes somewhere unexpected)#its pretty responsive at least. trade off for the surgically implanted nonsense is that its pretty dexterous.#but it still gets in the way most of the time#still gotta work out the visuals more. been thinking about how the connection to his arm should look so that's a start#but i dunno what ill do at the joints yet#gonna have to check out some references for that probably. armor and robot designs and real prosthetics#find something believable enough looking and also sci fi-y
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Us Batfamily fic writers need to get even more creative with the kind of tech the Bats use on patrol. I’m talking like ascending/descending tones in their earpieces to indicate incoming hostiles or attacks. Sensors and biometrics in the armor with read-outs in their lenses. Little metal clips attached to their back molars so they can engage comms or other tech hands free by clicking their teeth together a certain way. Gloves that lock a certain way depending on how the fingers are positioned so they can activate their gauntlets for a fall/slide. Magnetic soles to their boots that engage with a certain click command. Implants they can trigger by holding their breath long enough to indicate they need a rescue. Etc.
#just spitting out some ideas#I know yall have even better ones#but like#the possibilities are endless#bruce wayne#batman#dc#batfamily#Gotham#dc comics#Fic ideas
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mcr blogger dash in 2025
🪳 buggerard
still so much debate about sexualizing gerards moans in Self-Flagellant but no ones talking about why in that muffled intro mikey is asked to leave the studio??
#im telling you something happened #frerard solos dni
🌫️ coquettegee Follow
yes in the new doc lindsey had any pronouns on her intro card but so did gerard. i think they just used his as a template and its some sort of error
🔁 singleangelicnote
all your posts are still using he/him for gerard and this sounds terribly gendercrit get help op
🔁 coquettegee
i see him as more of a femboy type and i have since dd, don't try to police me
🔁 kondemnedkadaver
???
#CAN WE KILL THIS GUY
🐕 omgee
ROSY HAS A SISTER!!!!!!!!
#WORLD PEACE
🎙️amptits
"november 22nd of 2024 right before the teaser dropped" uh oh guys
Anonymous asked
when will you people address the themes of necrophilia in the limited vinyl comic
🪨 fyeahfoundationsofdecay
sorry i didnt have 200 dollars and i dont care
#the larger mcr conscious has forgotten he jerked it to horror movies
🌄 infectionpiece
a bralette and the comfort flannel
#i hauve
🧘 clergy-xxx
I have some. bad news. Frank did not
yt.be/78hskUi83Hn2nb67mdns00
🤹♀️ cryptclown
10 MINUTE AD WALL FOR THAT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT I THOUGHT PEOPLE WERE JUST JOKING. OR INSANE
✴️ grifties Follow
selling ltd edition frank iero binder!! it still has the skeleton decals and it still glows in most low light. from the first run with that chemical they had to recall so probably don't wear it without a shirt on top or if you don't have insurance lol. 30 bucks just dm me.
🧘crypt-xxx
i respect the hustle BUT WE HAVE STOP RESELLING THE BIOHAZARD MERCH
🦕 toro-saurus
October 25th 2022
RAY😍😍😍😍 RAY TORO🤗🤗🤗🤯🤯🤯🤯RAAYYYYYY
🔁 toro-saurus
omg my old post i was so correct
#meeee when the new single dropped #how does he find the time truly
🤺 singleangelicnote
Guys since why does that new pope follow Gerard's private account on Globeus theres only like 80 people on there she HAS to know
#THE GAY POPE???
🪳 buggerard
dude i lost my implant magnet 🥲 im using my old touchscreen to post on here
#gawd im having swarm tour livestream flashbacks
🧘 clergy-xxx
I actually went to a few shows during danger days and mikey would often just turn around during the destroya incidents. theres video on youtube if you can get past the ad walls
🤹♀️ cryptclown
oh okay super awesome!!! so mikey leaving during antics isnt new. did frank leave too?
🪨 fyeahfoundationsofdecay
does anyone remember when the heavn photos came out. i had a job then and i saw them literally a year later
🔁 buggerard
november 22nd of 2024 right before the teaser dropped
#wild night to be online tbh
🌬️ mesmer
i got concussed what happened sunday
🔁 mesmer
THEY DID WHAT
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"In a highly-anticipated world-first, the Texas Heart Institute has successfully implanted an artificial titanium heart that uses the same technology as bullet trains to pump blood mechanically throughout the body.
Called the Total Artificial Heart (TAH), the feat is seen as a major step in keeping people alive for longer and longer periods while they wait for heart transplants.
Texas Heart partnered with the medical tech company BiVACOR to create the TAH. It’s a titanium-constructed biventricular rotary blood pump with a single moving part that utilizes a magnetically levitated rotor that pumps the blood and replaces both ventricles of a failing heart.
The benefit of using magnetic levitation is that none of the moving parts ever scrape or slide against each other, reducing friction, and dramatically increasing the longevity of the device. But what’s really cool is the TAH can pump blood at a rate of 12 liters per minute, enough to allow an adult male to engage in exercise.
The first-in-human clinical study, overseen closely by the FDA, aims to evaluate the safety and performance of the BiVACOR TAH as a bridge-to-transplant solution for patients with severe bi or univentricular heart failure. Following this first implantation completed at Baylor St. Luke’s Medical Center in the Texas Medical Center, four additional patients are to be enrolled in the study.
“The Texas Heart Institute is enthused about the groundbreaking first implantation of BiVACOR’s TAH. With heart failure remaining a leading cause of mortality globally, the BiVACOR TAH offers a beacon of hope for countless patients awaiting a heart transplant,” said Dr. Joseph Rogers, President and Chief Executive Officer of The Texas Heart Institute and National Principal Investigator on the research.
“We are proud to be at the forefront of this medical breakthrough, working alongside the dedicated teams at BiVACOR, Baylor College of Medicine, and Baylor St. Luke’s Medical Center to transform the future of heart failure therapy for this vulnerable population.”
Heart failure is a global epidemic affecting at least 26 million people worldwide, 6.2 million adults in the US, and is increasing in prevalence. Heart transplantations are reserved for those with severe heart failure and are limited to fewer than 6,000 procedures per year globally. Consequently, the US National Institutes of Health estimated that up to 100,000 patients could immediately benefit from mechanical alternatives.
The successful implantation of BiVACOR’s TAH highlights the potential of innovative technologies to address critical challenges in cardiac care, such as long transplantation waitlists.
“This achievement would not have been possible without the courage of our first patient and their family, the dedication of our team, and our expert collaborators at The Texas Heart Institute,” said Daniel Timms, founder and CTO of BiVACOR."
youtube
-Article via Good News Network, August 1, 2024. Video via 7News Australia, July 26, 2024.
#heart transplant#organ transplant#medical news#public health#organ donation#heart disease#titanium#texas#australia#cyborg#mechanical#transhumanism#the future is now#like for real apparently#good news#hope#Youtube
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SWORDTEMBER DAY 19: MAGNETIC
Gaussian Edge, of split blade and opposing force 🧲🔩 Okay, before I can sell this to you, I need written and signed confirmation that you have no dental fillings, metallic joint replacements, or any other metal implants within your body. Oh, and you’ll most definitely want to take those piercings out - trust me.
Was very fun to draw all these little trinkets!
Yesterday’s sword!
You can support me on Patreon for £1 and help me make stuff like this!
#rbswordtember#Swordtember 2024#swordtember#Curated curios#art#artwork#animated#animation#animators on tumblr#illustration#illustrators on tumblr#artists on tumblr#dnd item#item#magic item#pretty#digital art#digital#fantasy#fantasy art#fantasy writing#writing#writing tumblr#flashing
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Different but not weird
McFoord x Child!R
Everything in italics is sign language.
Warnings: Mention of premature birth (corrected ages - nothing in depth), hearing loss, cochlear implants A/N: Not proof read properly and this is probably boring but yeah, hope you like it. (Also thank you to @alotofpockets for the help in coming up with an idea for this fic)
You were still in the NICU when Katie and Caitlin adopted you, having signed up for fostering to adopt just days before they met you. When the phone call began with “We know it may not be what you’re looking for and it might be a lot to take on,” they were hesitant, agreeing to just meet you and not agreeing to anything yet, wanting to see you and talk to the doctors and nurses to get more of a background on you. However you stole their hearts when they met you and they decided on that day they were going to adopt you. You were very small and spent quite some time in the NICU after they signed up to foster you. There were some concerns over your hearing during your time in the NICU, you had failed your AOAE and all subsequent tests. They thought it was possible it was because you were a premie and that maybe it would improve, however it didn’t, it stayed the same. So at 6 months (corrected age) you underwent surgery to have cochlear implants placed, before undergoing speech therapy.
“Ears” your Mum asked as you furiously shook your head, “Where did you put them?” she sighed. The most expensive item you owned by far was ‘lost’ somewhere on camp.
“Looking for these?” One of the physios said as she walked up behind Caitlin, causing your Mum to jump slightly, “Oh story didn’t mean to scare you. She handed them to me during training and told me to hold onto them, and not lose them because you would get mad,”
“Thank you,” you Mum sighed as she took them, you were at an age now where you had started realising you were different. You had noticed how the other kids didn’t have to wear things on the back of their ears, with wires that connected to magnets that stuck on their head, and your Mum had a slight suspicion that another kid at preschool had said something to you about them.
“Why don’t you want to wear your ears?” Your Mum asked you as she sat down next to you, you were now sitting at the small table in the empty common room as you coloured in.
“Weird,” you replied.
“Do you think they make you weird?” she questioned further, and you nodded, “why do you think that? Because they definitely don’t,” you just looked at her blankly, “Did someone at school say something?” you nodded your head at her slightly, before grabbing your ears to put them back on.
“Said it was weird I had magnets on my head, started to stick things to them when I didn’t have my ears on,” you told her.
“That’s not right, did you tell your teacher? He shouldn’t have done that, next time anyone says something hurtful about your ears you need to tell one of your teachers or at least me or Ma okay,” you nodded, “and you absolutely need to tell a trusted adult when someone is touching your body without your permission and in ways that make you feel uncomfortable okay?” she told you with a sterner voice this time, causing some tears to fall from your eyes, “hey chook, you have no reason to be upset, you’ve done nothing wrong, do you want to have an ear break for the rest of the day? You can put them back on whenever you want, but you can absolutely take them out if you want to, like you always can, you just need to make sure you tell me or Ma when you do so,” you nodded before taking the magnets off your head and handing them to your Mum.
_____
“Hey, y/n/n, how is my best buddy going?” Macca exclaimed as she entered the common room, before looking at Caitlin when you didn’t respond, your Mum had done individual training today so they hadn’t seen you yet.
“She can't hear you,” your Mum sighed.
“Oh, is there something going on?” the goalkeeper asked as she sat down next to your MUm, sensing her worry.
“A kid at her preschool told her she was weird because she had magnets stuck to her head, and then apparently when she hasn’t been wearing her implants, he has been sticking things to her head. I am just honestly so mad that the school hasn’t noticed the fact someone is doing this to her, but also that they clearly haven’t properly explained to the kids what they are and how they help even though they told us they would. I just don’t know what to do, I can't force her to wear them but when so few people can communicate with her at things like tomorrow if she doesn’t wear them, I almost have to make her wear them.”
“What if I spoke to her, showed her that I have things to help me hear too. Would that help?”
“Maybe, are you sure though?” “Of course Cait, I’m here to help, and this is something I would love to help her with, it took me a while to be comfortable with it and so I can’t imagine what it’s like as a kid finding your sense of self and with kids teasing you,”
“Is it alright if I call Katie while you talk to her? I need to tell her,”
“Of course, I’ve got chook, don’t worry.”
“Katie, do you have time to talk? It’s important,”
“Of course Cait, just give me a sec and I’ll go up to my room. How was training today?”
“Yeah good, it was just me, just as a precaution but yeah,”
“Okay, I’m in my room now, what did you want to talk to me about?”
“We need to move y/n preschools and have a serious conversation with our current preschool. She took her ears off during training and when I asked why she didn’t want to wear them she told me they are weird. Some kid at preschool has said she is weird for having magnets on her head and he has been sticking things to her head when she hasn’t had her ears on,”
“What, no that's wrong, we’re moving her and putting in a complaint, how haven't they seen it happen, they surely can’t be supervising correctly.” Katie paused, “Shit, Cait, I’m so fucking sorry, I need to go, I forgot we had an extra team meeting today. But I promise you, we will talk this through further and we will fix this for her.” Katie said before she hung up and proceeded to message Steph to see if she could check on Caitlin.
“Mummy, did you know Macca has hearing aids! She’s so cool, does that mean I’m cool?” you asked as you saw Steph and your Mum enter the room.
“You are always cool chook. No matter what anyone else thinks. You will always be cool and amazing and perfect,” She told you as she picked you up.“I’m sorry for not telling you and Ma and for making you worried and upset. I promise I’ll tell you next time.” “It’s okay chook. I love you so much, never forget that.” She told you as she held you slightly tighter and you buried your head in her neck.
#woso fanfics#woso imagine#woso x reader#arsenal wfc#awfc x reader#matildas x r#matildas x reader#matildas imagine#mackenzie arnold x reader#katie mccabe x reader#katie mccabe imagine#caitlin foord x reader#caitlin foord imagine
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starting a conspiracy theory that someone broke into the phouse while they slept and implanted a magnet in dan's left hand and phil's right shoulder
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Tony's surgeries in the cave: Part 2. First Surgery
All injuries caused by the explosion:
Shrapnel in the chest, mainly in the sternum area. Many barbs are too deep to be removed under these circumstances. Some of the shrapnel could have entered the heart through the blood vessels and damaged it, leading to sick sinus syndrome (arrhythmia).
Small wounds on the torso.
Long cut on the left collarbone.
Minor shrapnel wounds to the face and neck.
A trail of shrapnel wounds on the right forearm (with which he covered his face during the explosion).
Several barbs also hit the legs.
Blast injury (signs that we can see: lungs - wheezing; ears - bleeding; brain - confusion). The explosion itself could also damage the heart, causing arrhythmia.
Interesting fact - in the scene below, you can see that the explosion sent shrapnel through Tony. Barbs entered his chest and came out of his back. And you can see how big the wounds are.
Although while in the long run it's better for the shrapnel to go right through rather than get stuck in the body, in the short run he'd be very dead very soon.
For this reason and for the reason that there's no any sign of damage to his back after this scene, we should disregard this as a mistake made by visual effects specialists. But it's still a good idea for a fanfic.
What Yinsen did during the first surgery:
Stopped the bleeding.
Dealt with the consequences of the blast injury.
Performed sternotomy (cutting through the sternum and then reconnecting it). Removed the most dangerous shrapnel from Tony's chest.
Bolted an electromagnet to Tony's sternum and plugged it to a car battery to create a magnetic field that would attract the barbs and keep them away from Tony's heart.
Removed shrapnel from the rest of Tony's body.
Treated and stitched up the wounds.
What Yinsen did not do during the first surgery:
He did not remove Tony's sternum (sternectomy) because he didn't implant anything deep there.
He did not implant a pacemaker.
He did not implant the titanium socket for the reactor, because he didn't plan to implant it.
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Last post got me thinking about horns and okay, people love to draw dragons with piercings through their horns and make accents with whitespace illusions of holes through the horns. I also do this, it looks badass, but horns are bone? They're alive bone? And I've been trying to figure out how to make it work that's not only "magic".
There are all kinds of crazy horn modifications out there that just do things to the keratin - dying, carving, tattoos, caps, getting stuff enameled or embedded in the surface, as well as surface-level piercings - but having something go through the horn itself is Hard Core. That's an extreme level of body modification. It's the kind of thing you have to seek out a specialist for, and vet them thoroughly. If surface level relief carving is getting an earlobe pierced, then an all-through horn piercing is like corneal tattooing or those guys who implant magnets in their fingers.
The procedure is performed with something like a biopsy needle, but larger, and involves plague magic to control pain and sterilize and shape the wound. Even with numbing, it hurts like hell and the infection risk is high. Since you can't just leave your marrow exposed to the air, the opening is fitted with something like a gauge made of bioceramic or, less ideally, a body-safe plastic. It's common for these to made to look like other materials, or to have a veneer applied after it heals.
Recovery is simplified by the fact that there's no open wound and no joint involved, but it still hurts a lot and has to be kept an eye on. This usually includes follow-up visits with the artist or a doctor to check for signs of infection and administer medicine or magic to promote bone healing. The worst-case scenario is finding a crack in either the horn or the gauge, since that means potentially bacteria inside, I emphasize, your bones. The patient may or may not be provided sealant or disinfectant to put around the edge of the gauge, but it's unclear whether these actually help.
Once it's healed, you can either leave it as a hole or put stuff in it. Rings are a classic, as are various dangly things and plugs with cool designs.
#Tanya looks like she's got one but it's kind of a cheat#in the sense that it's a real hole through her horn#but snapper dragon horns are entirely keratin and don't have a bone core which makes it a much simpler procedure#this is also true of ridgebacks altho ridgie horns are relatively fragile and don't take well to modding in general#lore
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Now That I "See" You - An Ominis Gaunt x Reader One Shot
I've edited this so many times and yet I keep finding typos and mess ups 😥. I hope it's all better now.
Ominis Gaunt x Reader One Shot
Fluff? I think? I'm new to this. It's not spicy so.
Temporary eyesight, kissing, cuddling...I think that's it XD
(I got this idea from deaf people having Cochlear implants to be able to hear and I thought, what if they made glasses so you could only see when you wear them? (Using magic obviously, I know we can’t do that IRL) Also, if you got tired or overwhelmed seeing things, you could just take them off! Similar to the implants, when you don’t want to hear, you can just take the magnets off. Anyway I’m not the best at writing, but this idea was in my head for a long time! Enjoy!)
Basically: You’ve been working on a temporary fix to help Ominis see. You’ve tried multiple potions, charms, the lot. You came up with an idea to somehow enchant a pair of glasses to help him see. You’ve tried quite a few times, but you felt this pair was the one!
"I've done it!"
I yell as I sprint over to where Ominis is. He's in his usual spot. The cold, hard floor of the Defense Against the Dark Arts tower.
"You've said that at least a hundred times already" He teased, a small smirk playing on his lips as he looked in your general direction.
You shoot him a playful glare which he can sense, making his smirk grow wider. "Oh c'mon, try to be a little more supportive than that! This is for you, you know!"
I reach into my bag and pull out my invention as previous forms of it spill out, littering the floor. Pairs of glasses. Enchanted glasses to be specific.
These are intended to let the user see temporarily while they have them on. Ominis has been very patient with you through this long process with each prototype, each one giving no new result so far aside from one that made him see a blinding light once. You apologized again and again until he scolded you. He asked you to continue in the hopes that that meant there was some improvement in store.
You'd been at it for hours, days. The dark circles under your eyes making it more than evident of your sleep deprivation. Fortunately, the boy you care so much to stay up these ungodly hours for didn't notice, or so you thought.
"I hope these work this time, for your sake." He definitely noticed. “I don’t understand why you’re going through all of this effort in the first place, (Y/N) .”
I sigh. “Do I need a reason? If I must, I was curious if there was anything that could be done. When Sebastian told me your family tried everything, I felt like there had to be something!
“You sound an awful lot like Sebastian right now.” He chuckled softly as I instruct him to close his eyes before placing the glasses on his face, resting them on the bridge of his nose.
His eyes opened slowly as he felt the cold metal against his nose. Nothing. No difference. Not even the brightness that hurt his eyes with the last pair. He comes up with something, anything to hear the smile in her voice.
“I think I see something! Little shapes!” He tries to settle his voice as he lies, but it’s obvious to you.
“It’s alright,” You sigh in defeat, sinking to the floor to sit beside him. “I thought for sure this one would work! I used anything I could that claims to improve eyesight!”
He tilts his head toward you, a playful smirk growing on his face, “(Y/N), you can’t improve eyesight that wasn’t there to begin with.” He meant to say it in a teasing, yet comforting way, but then he heard a sniffle and quickly reached out to you, pulling you towards him before you could start crying.
“Shh..I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to come out that way, darling.” He rubs your back gently as he tries to soothe your disappointed heart. “I don’t need to see to be happy. I have you and Sebastian in my life. I couldn’t ask for anything more.” One hand moves to your hair while the other searches for and cups your cheek. “I don’t need sight to know how much I’m cared for, nor how beautiful you are.”
At this you blush slightly, the heat carrying over to his fingers. Your frown curling into a smile. “I know that…but I wanted to try. You deserve to see this beautiful world.”
He puts a finger to your lips, cutting you off. “All I want is to be here with you, my dear.” Ominis traces his finger along your lips. “And maybe a kiss as well” You look into his cloudy blue eyes, a mischievous glint dancing across them.
“That can definitely be arranged.” You reach for him and pull him close, connecting your lips, the kiss laced with passion and understanding. Feeling his kiss settled your sadness and desire to keep trying to help him see. You relax almost enough to fall asleep in his arms, but tense up when you start slipping.
After a few moments you pull away. “You know it’s a shame, you look very handsome in these glasses.”
He chuckles, lifting a hand to caress your cheek. “If you’d like, I’ll wear them for a bit.” His eyes widen suddenly and flicker around your face. He…sees something! Similar to his wand, being able to see shapes, silhouettes of people and objects, but a bit different. He can see a bit more shapes.
You notice his eyes travel to yours, locking onto them. “Ominis?” You look at him, a confused, concerned expression plastered on your face. He can see the outline of your eyebrows turning inward.
“I..I can see..maybe not everything, but…(Y/N)..I think it worked after all!” He cups your face, still looking into your eyes, lifting his hands to your face to feel the features he sees. “This is incredible! I see my hands moving, the outline of your jaw, your eyes.” He pauses for a moment, a warm, affectionate smile forming on his face. “You’re beautiful (Y/N)! Just as I thought! Oh Merlin, this is incredible!”
You take a moment to register his words, blinking rapidly. Finally, your face softens and you smile. “It worked?”
“Yes! I can see far more than I can with my wand!” He reaches down with ease and grasps your hands tightly. “Thank you (Y/N), truly.”
Feeling both accomplished and full of love for this man, you pull him into a tight embrace. You both hold each other, tearing up slightly from the excitement. You immediately start thinking of more experiments to try out.
#ominis gaunt#ominis x mc#ominis gaunt x hufflepuff reader#ominis gaunt x reader#ominis x reader#hogwarts legacy x reader#hogwarts legacy#harry potter#ominis gaunt one shot#fluff#couple cuddling
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Really Drives Me Mad | Older!Eddie x Fem!Reader | 18+
Prev Part l Master List |
Word Count: 10k
A SPECIAL HAPPY BIRTHDAY POST. (I’m 28 y’all)
Chapter contains: brief pregnant!reader, babies/kids…this is like a lil collection of blurbs. I have some head canons about each OC I can post if you’d like xoxo
I had ideas about their kids for ages, lol. This crazy lil family is chaotic
Still thank you to @forget-you-morelike-fuck-you and @bebe07011 for without you two this fic wouldn’t nearly be this good
Third trimester is a bitch. I barely have the bandwidth to write lately. I hope you enjoy
Two pink little lines stare back at you as Eddie turns the shower on, completely oblivious to the manic state you’re in.
He offers you to join him, a temptation you decline with an intense amount of reluctance. You just claim you need your own bed, which was true.
Eddie missed four weeks of work while you were on your luxe honeymoon, which means he now has several fires to put out. It keeps him busy for the week, making the doctor’s appointments and blood work you do that much easier when he passes right out on his couch at the end of his long days.
The following week, knowing you're pregnant but not being able to tell him is pure torture. It doesn't help that for some odd reason Eddie seems more lovey, more affectionate. Your first instinct is to chalk it up to your newlywed status, but his affection feels different, the way his arms wrap around you each morning to wake you up, his gentle voice low in your ear. It's driving you up a wall not being able to share your secret with him.
He seems to consistently have a hard time letting you go to leave for work (not that you’re complaining.) Though eventually you have to practically push him out the door.
The ultrasound is nearly dull, the implantation in question is only a bundle of cells, but once you get a photo from the tech at the end of the appointment, it’s the very thing you needed to tell Eddie.
After another early night of falling asleep you empty the face of the fridge, yanking every magnet off as you place the sonogram on the silver surface with a pink heart magnet right at his eye level.
-
Eddie wakes in the middle of the night, a sudden urge to rise hitting him out of nowhere. His arm tightens around your waist, admiring your pretty face as he kisses your cheek. Your face falters only the littlest bit, twitching your muscles to shake off the tickle of his stubble.
He finds himself starving, craving something only a feral racoon would also be satisfied with. He rubs his eyes as he walks down the steps. Sometimes he thinks he’s going to see you back in the kitchen chair in the dress and bathing suit, Dylan searching manically for a parking pass as if Eddie has imagined this whole dream scenario. Your love is just too good not to think he’d made it all up at times. He smiles to himself as he turns on the stove light, turning to the fridge for a snack.
He feels frozen by the blank fridge at first, wondering where all the magnets got to. The black and white image staring him dead in the face suddenly registers, the heart shaped magnet falling to the floor as he rushes to pick it up to make sure his tired eyes aren’t fucking with him. They bulge out of his head when the significance of the photo occurs to him, and the hunger that woke him up seems to vanish.
His long legs take the stairs two and three at a time as he rushes back to you, hurling himself beneath the covers.
The cold of his arms startles you, a gasp leaving your lips from the shock as you abruptly awoke. “Hmm?”
“Are you fucking pregnant, sweetheart?” His eyes are unbearably soft, melted pools of milk chocolate staring intently at you.
A burst of sleepy giggles leaves your mouth, turning your body so you don't have to crane your neck. “You got up early.” You comment, weaving your fingers into his curls.
“Skip the pleasantries, love.” He dismisses, scooping his arms beneath your back. “Are you fucking pregnant?”
You pull him in for a kiss, your legs wrapping around his hips to pull him down against you. “What’s the sonogram tell you?”
He chuckles against your lips, his thumbs swaying against your smiling cheeks. “You’re a little shit, you know that?” You nod, absentmindedly playing with his curls. “Fuck, I’m so excited right now, baby.”
“Really?” You ask him, grinning.
“I just found out my wife is having my baby. Are you fucking kidding me?” he asks, rutting his hips against yours desperately. “I’m rock hard, sweets.”
Lucky for you and him, you opted for a pair of tiny panties and a t-shirt to bed, feeling his hardened cock against the thin lace fabric of your panties. Your fingers fumble to his boxers, hurriedly pushing them down his hips. “Then fuck me.”
Eddie gently pulls the fabric aside, exposing it as his head perfectly brushes against your entrance. “God, my girl is soaked for me, ain’t she?”
Your thighs tighten around his hips, jaw dropping as he teases you. “Want you, please, Ed.” Your eyes squeeze shut, relishing in the feeling of him pressed against you
He pushes in, arms wrapping themselves around your torso. “Oh my god you’re having my fucking baby,” Eddie mumbles, face curling into your neck. “Gonna see your stomach all big when you’re carrying my baby, sweets, and you’ll be even hotter than you are now. Which I thought was impossible.”
No words come to mind, mouth open and gasping at the way he moves in you. The cotton of your shirt is too hot, your hands shakily grabbing at the fabric to take it off. Eddie admires the sight he sees as your piqued nipples fall out of his faded black t-shirt, his eyes glazed over as he stares down at them. A moth drawn to the light, he dives into one, curling his tongue around the nipple with the perfect mix of teeth, pulling little mewls from you.
“Fuck, we’re gonna be the happiest little family,” he chokes, kissing from your breast up to your neck, his voice filled with emotion.
“Love you,” you sigh, gasping into his open mouth as his hips hit you harder.
Eddie smiles, a wicked little grin as his hand curves over the swell of your tummy, thumb petting it gently.
“Hold on to me, sweetheart. Hold on to your baby daddy,” you grin the line, wonderfully cheesy, but Eddie feels the way you tighten around him. Your arms curl around his back, pulling his body against yours.
“Eddie, make me cum, please.”
“Hold on, baby, I’m almost there, hold on,” he stutters, his deep voice starting to falter. His lips bend down to your ear, gasping desperately, bordering on whining. “Fuck– cum with me.”
His lips wrap around yours, delicately connecting his tongue with yours as his hips stutter a final time, the little moans vibrating against your lips as he fills you up. As you collapse on the bed, sweaty bodies intertwined, he spends the twenty minutes until he falls asleep cooing, whispering in your ear how excited he is.
You wake up the same way, with rounds two and three before he begrudgingly trudges off to work.
-
The sun accounts as a natural alarm clock as Dylan stretches his limbs wide, turning to face his girlfriend. His arm falls over Maya’s form, pulling her in as he starts to wake up. “Morning, Dylan,” she whispers, her pink lips spreading into a smile.
He pulls her back against his stomach, hiking his legs under hers. “Mornin’.”
She hums as he kisses the back of her neck, giggling as he takes a deep inhale of her shampoo. “You work today?”
“No,” Dylan answers, caressing the strip of her exposed skin with his thumb. “I am seeing my dad today.”
She smirks, turning to face him. “And your stepmom?” Dylan grits his teeth, tickling her stomach until she begs him to stop, hunching over the arm around her. “Okay, I’m sorry!”
“Mmhm. I’m telling them, did you want to join me?”
Maya squishes her face, seemingly debating on pros and cons. “I’m gonna pass on that, respectfully.” She can feel the questioning look Dylan gives her. “I have a long shift today, and I am exhausted.”
“Next time, I’m dragging you with me,” Dylan insists, squeezing with his arms wrapped around her.
“I’m counting on it.”
As soon as Dylan opens the door, he listens in, waiting for a sound that never comes. Good, he waited long enough to come. He wanders into the kitchen, meeting his dad drinking orange juice straight from the carton. “Dad?”
His dad freezes, removing the spout from his mouth, and wipes his face hurriedly. “Hey bud.”
Dylan raises his eyebrow at him, pointedly glancing to the carton and back to him.
“Don’t tell my wife.”
Dylan smirks, rolling his eyes. “Speaking of the devil, where is she?”
“Upstairs.”
As if your ears are burning, the two men’s ears pick up the particular sound of someone coming down the stairs. Eddie prays you come downstairs with some clothes on. Your face lights up when you see Dylan, welcoming him into your arms without a second thought. “Dylan!” The familiarity you two share is still new, but wrapping him in a hug is like second nature at this point. “What brings you into this part of the world?”
You leave the embrace, backing straight into Eddie’s arm. “Actually, I have some news I wanna share with you guys.”
Eddie’s hand tightens around your arm, he’s mentioned Dylan talking about proposing last month, and this news felt right around the corner. He feigns ignorance, innocently asking, “Oh, what news would that be?”
Dylan’s cheeks bloom in red, glancing down to his feet sheepishly. You just hoped you wouldn’t have to travel to a destination wedding while largely pregnant. “Uh, we–or, Maya,” he clears his throat, a laugh stuttering through it, “Maya’s pregnant.”
The first thing you do is glance at your husband, both sporting wide eyes and slacked jaws. To say you’re surprised is a grand understatement.
“Not the news you were expecting?” Dylan asks, watching the two of you share a silent conversation.
In sync, the two of you switch back to him, twin smiles on your faces. Dylan had no idea what either of the faces in front of him could possibly mean, and there’s a part of him that wonders if this is happy news for either of you.
“Um, no, actually,” Eddie barely holds back the sound of laughter in his voice. “That’s, that’s fantastic news, Dyl.” Truly, fantastic news. Eddie has been looking forward to being a biker grandfather since Dylan showed interest in being a father.
You smirk, leaning into his shoulder. “How far along is she?”
“Uh, 8 weeks, or so,” Dylan answers, squishing up his face comically.
“Oh wow, so a week behind me, then,” you say nonchalantly, nodding at Eddie.
“Wait, what?” Dylan asks, making sure he understood that correctly.
You giggle, nodding as you sit your head in Eddie’s neck. “Yeah, I’m pregnant too, ironically enough.”
Eddie leans into your ear, “So you’re gonna be a mom and a grandma in the same year…”
Your eyes widen. “To think, I was just getting used to the idea of being a mom.” You lean back, meeting your husband’s pretty brown eyes. “Are we sure the kid’s gonna call me grandma?”
Dylan picks up the conversation right away. “I mean, unless we’re gonna be completely honest with them, it doesn't make sense otherwise. You’re grandpa’s wife, therefore grandma.”
Am I mom, then, too? You think to yourself, knowing you’ll point it out later. Your stomach rumbles, turning around to the counter to start making a breakfast of sorts. Your eyes hit the open orange juice jug and the lack of cup. “Did you drink straight out of the carton, again, mister?”
Eddie avoids your eyes, looking at his son. “Hey, I didn’t say anything,” he surrenders, having a seat at the island.
“How’s Maya been handling the pregnancy so far?” you ask, grabbing a pan from under the cupboards. “Because morning sickness is no joke.” You pause, leaning on the counter. “Not just in the morning, either.”
“I think it’s some nausea, a bit of acid reflux, but to my knowledge she hasn’t been sick,” Dylan says, taking out his phone to text Maya about the news.
“Bitch,” you mutter, the tone in your voice clear you’re joking. “We can’t all be so lucky. Eggs?”
Dylan nods, grinning at the text Maya shoots back. “So dad, you’re gonna have a kid and a grandkid the same age as each other?”
Eddie shrugs, taking another large sip from the carton. “Since my girl showed up, my life hasn’t been normal, and this just means it will never be normal again.”
“You’re welcome,” Dylan laughs, rolling his eyes at the exasperated look you shoot at him.
-
Dylan’s phone buzzes, glancing at the unknown number as Maya fades in the middle of her sentence. “One minute, babe, I’m expecting a call from the interview I just did last week. Dylan Munson, speaking.”
“Oh, Dyl-pickle, you sound so big!” Only one person has ever called Dylan that. He gulps, the sound of her voice bringing up old, sore emotions.
“Brooke. W-why are you calling me?”
“Brooke? C’mon, I’m your mom, sweetheart,” she whines, her voice the sound of nails on a chalkboard.
“Really, are you?” Dylan asks, getting up from the bed and starting to pace the hallway, his anger already building. “Ok, what college did I go to?” Silence. “What did I major in? What year did I graduate high school? When did I have my first kiss? Who’s my current girlfriend? What’s my best friend’s name? What sort of vehicle do I drive?”
She doesn’t answer a single question, instead giving stuttered empty answers. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to answer any of that… We haven’t exactly been talking for the last fifteen years.” She says, somewhat accusatory.
Dylan sighs, rubbing his face frustratedly. “What, your phone didn’t work all those years?”
“As far as I’m concerned, I’m not the only one who had a phone,” she protests, sounding incredibly defensive.
“Yeah, well, you also weren’t a child for 8 of those years who begged his dad for his mom to come to one thing that was important to him,” Dylan retaliated, angry at her gaslighting. “My dad had your number, always left voicemails inviting you to my soccer games, to award ceremonies, to my birthdays, and you never answered a single call, let alone showed up.”
“I’m sorry, Dylan, I am, but I was young then, you can’t blame me for wanting a fresh start.”
“Actually, I can,” Dylan answers, now done with this conversation. “You had eight years to be a mom before I finally gave up on you. You don’t get to pick and choose when to be my mom, now.”
“I’m sorry that hurt your feelings, Dyl. But I have two boys, and they really want to meet their older brother. Would you come down for lunch one day?”
He nods, knowing that this sudden need to be a mom again wasn’t going to come for free. “No. I have no interest in being your life. Not since the day I turned 18.”
“C’mon, Dyl–”
“No, mom–Brooke. No. Don’t call me again, please. I need to go now.”
She starts another sentence, but Dylan hangs up on her before he hears it. When he walks into the bedroom he shares with his girlfriend, he crawls into the bed next to her, feeling like the ten year old whose life got torn apart.
It looks like Brooke still has that uncanny talent for making everything about her.
-
Eddie sits in his office, a small room decorated with frames filled with the faces of those he loves and papers strewn around the desk. He’s going over the receipts and payments, and silently regrets not having hired an accountant by now, but he’s far too stubborn to admit it.
There’s a knock on the door and Eddie looks up in relief. Please, let there be a disgruntled customer to save him from the numbers. “Come on in!”
Connor, one of the new apprentices he hired only a few months ago comes in, looking timid. The first few months he has a new hire they’re usually shy, and when their self confidence in their ability to do their job kicks in, Eddie truly starts to miss it. “Uh, hey, boss, there’s a client out there who wants to speak to you.”
Eddie chuckles, leaning back in his chair as he rests his feet on his desk. “Don’t, don’t call me boss. What do they want?”
Connor screws up his face. “Uh, I forgot to ask.”
“Always ask, man. Tell them I’ll be right out.”
“Alright, I’ll tell her.” Eddie sighs in relief, women tend to be more understanding.
“Hey, send in Joe, will ya?”
“On it!”
Joe, a man who’s worked for Eddie for 20 years, older by ten years, walks into the office just a moment later. “What’s up, Ed?”
“Give the lady a talk, will ya?” Eddie asks, scratching the itch on his right forearm. “Ask her what she wants.” Joe, tall, dark, and quiet, nods and shuts the door.
He’s back in the office in seconds. The door’s loose knob has barely clicked shut before it’s abruptly opened again. “That fast?”
Joe shakes his head, his eyes wide with a grimace on his face. “Uh, no, it’s…it’s Brooke.”
Eddie scrunches his face up. “Brooke, like…Brooke?”
“Yeah. You want me to–”
“No it’s okay, I got it,” Eddie insists, a pit forming in the depths of his stomach. He rubs his face tiredly, fully unprepared to deal with this.
“Dude, you sure?” He asks, having been with Eddie through the divorce.
“Seriously, I got it. Thanks, man.”
Eddie gets up from his desk, catching the eyes of his long-time employees on his way to the entrance of the garage. He’s fine. He’ll be fine.
There she stands, looking around the garage holding her purse with two hands. She’s dressed like one of those Instagram moms, high waisted jeans with a loose blouse tucked in under a long coat. Her eyes land on him, her face lighting up as she exclaims, “Wow, the garage looks great!”
“Thanks,” Eddie mumbles, sighing. “Is there a particular reason for…”
Brooke smiles, and Eddie could almost see a genuine human behind the mask. “Um, do you mind if we go into your office?”
Eddie raises his brows, perplexed. “I really don’t see the necessity for it.”
“It’s not really a conversation to have in front of the guys, Eds,” Brooke comments, shuffling her feet as she crosses her arms.
Eddie winces at the nickname she calls him. She really doesn’t know him well enough to call him such anymore. The audacity of it astounds him. “I’m not Eds to you…and my office holds things that are precious to me, that I honestly want to keep out of this conversation.”
“Like I haven’t already seen pictures of your little wife,” Brooke grimaces, her tone switching from sweet to condescending in a split second, her eyes rolling. “Congrats on that, or whatever.”
Eddie blinks, too exhausted to argue. “Alright, come on.”
It's not like Brooke hasn’t been in his office before, Eddie thinks, they were happily married, after all. She looks around at the changes, her eyes seemingly fixated on where photos of Dylan’s previous achievements are proudly displayed. “Wow, he looks just like you,” Brooke mutters, a look on her face that Eddie can’t quite place.
Eddie assessed the bulletin, Dylan’s graduation, first school dance, the Munsons spending a weekend at the Harrington’s, it certainly spelled out to her what she missed out on.
He clears his throat, quietly asking for her to continue. “Right, um, I was wondering if you could talk to our son.”
“Our son?” Eddie asks, barely holding back his laughter. “Last time I checked you said he was my son.”
Brooke ignores it, faltering in her seat. “I tried calling him last week, but he shut me down.”
“What do you need me to talk to him about exactly?” Eddie leans against his desk, his hands gripping the edge.
Brooke blinks, tilting her head. “When did you cut your hair?”
“Irrelevant. What do you need me to talk to him about?” Eddie enunciates, already feeling the exhaustion of her mere soul sucking presence.
“My sons are asking questions about him, and they would like to meet him.” She inhales, as if preparing herself for what she was about to say, “I would love to reconnect with both of you, honestly.”
Like an anvil, Eddie feels his stomach pull him all the way down into the floor. The silence she’s given him and Dylan for the last fifteen years has been stable, reliable even. The most reliable thing about her. This is turning off the road into a ditch with nothing to instigate it. “What did he say?”
“Uh, he had no interest in it,” Brooke shrugs, leaning back in her seat.
Eddie nods, having expected it. “Brooke, those pictures on the wall? My son spent so much time begging me to call and get you to at least one event, one time just to show that you still cared about him.” He pauses, watching her avoid his eyes. “I left dozens of voicemails in your inbox, and I know it was your inbox, because I remember the day it went from Munson to Prescott. I begged you to show up. Just once. The last time I did was for his graduation, but by then I had stopped telling him.”
“He told our lawyers and the judge he wanted nothing to do with me. Forgive me if I thought he was telling the truth,” Brooke huffs, her voice sounding defensive.
“He was a child, Brooke!” Eddie deadpans, narrowing his eyes. “A child hurt by his mother’s actions tearing apart his happy family. Staying with the stable parent was probably the more appealing option.” He scratches at the stubble on his face, glancing over to the sonogram sitting on his desk. He’d hoped Brooke hadn’t caught wind of that news, yet. “At first, he was really hurt, but after a while, he just wanted his mom. Who never showed up.”
“Well, I might be a little late, but doesn’t it count for something that I’m trying, now?” She asks, folding her arms across her chest.
“I think it counts more that he’s about to be a father and he has no interest in including you in his kid’s life.”
Her eyes bug right out of her head. “Wait, what?”
“Mmhm. Seems he’d rather give what was supposed to be your title to someone he’s known for less than a year.” Eddie flickers to the photo of you he has framed, a portrait of you surrounded by the sunset in your wedding dress. “You had eight years, Brooke. Eight. You don’t get to decide to be a parent when it’s convenient for you. I never had that luxury. I had to pick myself and my son up and find a way to get through it emotionally without falling apart at the seams.”
She seems to start talking, but Eddie is on a roll. “I finally feel like I’m living my life, and not just surviving. If you reached out five years ago, I probably would’ve said yes. I even had a low enough self-esteem to hope it would mean something more…but now I have this woman, this beautiful person who showed me how much she believes I’m worth, showed me how much I am worth. Brooke, no offense, but when I look back on it, especially comparing the two, you treated me like shit.”
“Uh, okay,” Brooke mutters, holding her hand out. “I did not treat you like shit.”
“You never stuck up for me with your parents, forced me to do things I was uncomfortable with all the time, gave ‘our’ son’s teachers hell all the time, and, oh yeah, left me for the person you told me not to worry about. So, no I will not be talking to my son. If he comes to the conclusion to reconnect with you, then fine. But I will not be participating.”
“Wow, you’re being harsh.” Brooke complains, grimacing. “Eddie, I was young. I made a few stupid decisions.”
“You know, my wife is a bit young. Somehow, she already knows not to act like a stone cold cunt.” Brooke stutters through an empty response, completely rendered speechless. “I think we’re done here.”
“I’m not done!”
“Well, I suggest you be by the time my pregnant wife gets here, because she’s not your biggest fan.” It gives him the utmost satisfaction to start looking through the papers. He glances back up to her expectant expression. “Safe travels back to Boston, hmm?”
Eddie swears the smile on your face in the photo of you grows, glad the backbone he needed seems to have finally grown. “You’re not going to even–”
“No. I’m not. I’m done here, Brooke. Give Kevin my condolences, yeah?”
Brooke nods, reluctantly understanding she wasn’t going to get what she wanted. Eddie had indeed grown the self-confidence she never saw when she was with him. “Condolences?”
“Yeah, for still being stuck with you. Close the door on your way out.”
Brooke’s nostrils flare, her jaw locking. She turns around without another word, the slam of the door echoing through the garage as she storms out, every click of her heel enunciated.
Moments later, Joe pops through the door. “Everything, ok, Ed?”
Eddie looks up, his dimples pronounced on his face. “Oh just, peachy, Joe. Mind if I take off for the rest of the day?”
“I would be concerned if you didn’t, man.”
-
The ringing of your phone stirs you from your slumber, having passed out on the couch mid snack. An app you downloaded on your phone for the pregnancy said the first trimester would have you feeling quite sleepy, and you didn’t believe it until you find yourself constantly falling asleep during your off days, and exhausted at work when you really shouldn’t be.
Your sister’s name lights up the screen, and the quick assessment of the movie tells you you’ve been asleep for at least forty-five minutes. “Hey, Viti.”
“Hey, sis,” she greets, an airy tone in her voice. “Sounds like you just woke up.”
You haven’t broken the news to your family, yet, waiting to present the information in the form of a present next time you and Eddie make your way over to your parents’ house. “Had an afternoon siesta,” you sigh, watching the movie you’re tempted to restart. The twist of Carlisle’s death just isn’t the same if you don’t build up to it. “What’s up?”
She sighs, a habit you’re all too familiar with. “Spit it out.”
“Okay,” she starts, gaining her courage. “Me and Arlo got together the night of your wedding.”
If you were attempting to get rid of any sense of sleep, it disappeared within a second. The information takes a second to register, eyes darting around the living room filled with wrappers you have yet to throw out. “Harrington?”
She laughs, probably expecting a much worse answer. “Do you know any other Arlos?”
“Guess not.” You pet the bangs in your eyes away from your face, trying to remind yourself of the look on your baby sister’s face when she was slow dancing with him. “Ok. How did it happen?”
“You’re okay with this?” She asks, your heart melting at how little her voice sounds.
“It was never my choice, Vi,” you answer, using the remote to restart the movie. “If you like him and trust him, then, yeah, I’m okay with it. So how did it happen? Tell me all about it. But if you’ve slept with him, then maybe not all about it,” You chuckle. Viti sighs exasperatedly and you can practically hear her eyes roll through the phone.
“Um, so we were kind of flirting a lot after the family dinner. I thought he was just being nice, but I was willing to be his friend. It got a bit more intense at the wedding, and he asked me to dance…”
“I saw,” you admit, granted you only saw because Eddie pointed it out to you. “What happened after that?”
You can hear the smile on her face. “He led me to a hallway, and then we went to the hotel room I was staying in…” She trails off sheepishly. Oh, that's all you need to know.
“Damn, girl!” you laugh, opting to push away the mental image and simply be your sister's friend right now.
“We went to dinner last week,” she says, a giggle laced through her sentence. “I really, really like him.”
It had to be Arlo Harrington. “Then I’m really, really happy for you. Have you told everyone else yet?”
“You’re the last to know, to be honest. I think Eddie even knows at this point.” You roll your eyes, because of course that’s why he was so peculiar this morning.
“Just because I don’t necessarily approve of the choice of boy doesn’t mean I won’t be happy for you. Plus, I could get used to him, after all, Steve isn’t so bad.” That’s a damn lie, Steve Harrington has become one of your favorite people. “Tell me you got out of the hotel room before mom and dad discovered you.”
“We heard them coming down the hall…” she says, giggling. “We were dressed as they were about to come in the door. Luckily, they were both pretty drunk, so they didn’t really catch on to what was happening. Well, until the next morning at brunch, I guess.”
Note, send a text to your mom asking about what her perspective was, because there’s a chance she knew more than she let on. You think to yourself.
“Anyway, four weeks in Cancun. Spare me the dirty details but tell me all about it,” she giggles, moving the phone away from her face, “shut up, stop, shut up!’
“Let me guess. Arlo?”
A burst of giggles runs through her body and you can hear the smile on her face. “Maybe,”
“You couldn’t wait until you were alone?”
“She’s not really alone all that much these days,” Arlo’s voice rings out. You can picture the smug smirk on his face.
“Arlo!” She chides him, and yeah, this might not be so bad, you decide.
“I’m gonna let you two go,” you offer, dismissing any protests she let out. “Also, without the dirty details there’s not much of the honeymoon to tell. Well, except one thing.”
“What?”
“You'll have someone new to meet in seven months!”
“No way!”
-
If there’s one thing you know, it’s Christina Perri’s A Thousand Years is the song for the last credit scene of the Twilight Series. As each character is shown with the corresponding credit, it gets closer and closer to the main cast.
It might just be the hormones, but this round of credits just seems to hit differently, tears spilling down your cheeks as it gets to the Cullen family. The front door to the house slams shut, announcing the arrival of your husband. Odd, he’s about three hours early.
The weight of the cushion next to you sinks down with a comforting arm wrapping around your shoulders. Your head falls easily into his embrace, curling into his lap as you sniffle. It’s ridiculous, the irrational reaction that takes over you, but damn do the editors know how to elicit a reaction out of the audience.
His hand pets your shoulder, kissing your forehead. “You crying at Twilight?”
You nod, furrowing your eyebrows. “Lose the smug attitude, mister. This is your doing.”
He laughs under his breath, petting your hair. “Hmm, that’s not how I remember our honeymoon.”
You tilt your head back to look at his face, fretting at the curls that are starting to resemble closer to a mullet. “Just because I begged for your babies does not mean you had to listen to me.”
He rolls his eyes, leaning in to place a kiss on your lips that takes the breath out from your lungs. As he backs away, he hums with a peculiar look on his face. “What’s on your mind?” You ask, your brows knitting together.
Eddie sighs, petting the bare skin exposed on your hip. “Minor Brooke update, today.”
Your brows instinctively rise, feeling every little muscle in your face tense up. “Oh?”
“Yup. Are you interested?”
You close your eyes, asking any entity out there listening for a lick of patience. “You piqued my interest. Lay it on me.”
Eddie can’t beat around the bush, or he would never say it. “She came into my work today.” He pauses, allowing you to absorb the information before continuing. “Requesting that I convince Dylan to…let her back into his life, so to say.” You squint, remembering the few times that Dylan had confessed about his mom to you, always finishing by claiming he wants nothing to do with her and never will.
“Yeah, good luck with that,” you comment, watching his eyes flicker back and forth between yours.
“She reached out to him last week and when he refused, I guess the next most logical step was to drive the six hours from Boston and corner me at work.” Your teeth grit, angry at the fucking gall that fills Brooke whatever-the-fuck her last name is. God forbid Steve or Eddie ever accidentally tell you what it is, because the day it comes her inbox will be flooded with just a little piece of your mind, and she'll be lucky if profanities are the worst things you say.
“What are you thinking?” He asks, having watched your face move through the storm of emotions.
“I was thinking that I fucking hate your ex-wife and if she has no haters then I’m dead,” you answer, dead panning.
“I love you,” he sighs, tugging you in against his chest. “Are you hungry?”
You look at the wrappers decorating the mahogany coffee table, “Surprisingly yes.”
“Lets get a real meal in you, shall we?”
-
Eddie is present at every doctor's appointment, every ultrasound, birthing class, and even at 20 weeks, when you were inexplicably spotting, stayed with you throughout the 7 hour wait at the ER. He certainly helped you hide from the embarrassment of the doctor explaining the bleeding seemed to be brought on by intercourse and to start being a bit more careful.
Only one time does a health care worker mistake Eddie for being your father, a mistake quickly fixed at the death glare he gives her. You don’t know how, as you look nothing alike and he has been doting on you too affectionately to be a dad, but you can’t help teasing him by calling him daddy as soon as she leaves the room.
Well, that’s a lie.
There is one other time he’s mistaken for your father, running into the maternity ward and anxiously stating your name to the front desk of labor nurses. The head nurse, a woman bearing silver streaks in her hair, calmly tells him to relax and sit down, only the baby’s father is allowed in the room with patients.
“Well you better take me to my wife, then,” he deadpans, his eyes harsh enough to shoot daggers if it were physically possible.
She stutters through her response. “Oh, you-you’re her husband? I’m so sorry I assumed–my mistake, she’s in the third door on the left.”
He rushes to the door, ignoring her last pleas for forgiveness. He was far too busy focusing on how he knew he shouldn’t have gone into work when he knew you were due to go into labor any day now. He knew he should've told them to ask Joe for the solution, as he was basically acting owner while he was away.
When he bursts through the door, you’re sat on the bed in the room with Bethany petting your face as you push through a particularly hard contraction.
He waits and watches anxiously for you to get through it before announcing his arrival. As soon as your eyes land on him he sees your face crumple in relief and your hands reach out for him. “Baby,” you whine, seeking the comfort of his shampoo and cologne.
“I’m so sorry,” he apologizes, planting a big kiss on the hand that was reached out. “Thank you so much, Bethany, for taking her.”
She shrugs, dismissing his over exaggerated gratitude. “She’s been a champ. Let me know if you two need anything.”
Eddie pets your hair, leaning in to plant a gentle kiss on your lips. “How’ve you been, baby?”
“Only been an hour, and I am so over labor,” you whine, smiling pathetically. “Thanks for coming so fast.”
Eddie was surprised he didn’t get pulled over, going 90 down the freeway. He turned a 20 minute drive into 8. “Made any progress?”
“I’m only one centimeter dilated. We could be here for a while.”
“I’m here every minute,” he says, grabbing a chair to sit by your bed. “I believe in you. We’ll listen to Taylor, listen to a smutty audio book, watch a true crime series, whatever you want, baby.”
-
True to his word, he allowed you to blast your Faves Spotify playlist, watched a few episodes of 48 Hours with you, and even sat with you as he let you play with the makeup you had packed in your hospital bag on his face.
You made him look like a Captain Jack Sparrow, giggling as he animatedly talks in a pirate voice. The best thing about Eddie being there is that he wards off your parents and others who wish to visit you in your labor and acts as your advocate when the nurse is too rough with you and requests a new nurse immediately. Well, and his presence alone puts you at ease, of course.
It feels like forever, but you’re eight centimeters dilated when a familiar face walks down the hall, passing his father as he carries the millionth cup of ice chips you requested. “Bud! Did someone text you about–”
“She told me when Bethany was driving her to the hospital, but that’s actually not why we’re here,” Dylan sheepishly admits, his shoulders shrugging up to his ears as a pink blooms across his cheeks.
“We?” Eddie catches on, blinking. “Is Maya also..?”
“Yeah, we got here about three hours ago,” he squinted one eye comically, crossing his arms. “She’s about halfway there, now I think.”
“Wow she’s progressing a lot faster than we did,” Eddie comments, it taking you far more than three hours to get to five centimeters.
“It would be ironic wouldn’t it, if they had the same birthday?”
“Irony is one word for it,” Dylan chuckles. “My girlfriend asked for ice chips about eight minutes ago, and she is not patient, so I’m going to get back to it.”
“Let us know any updates, won’t you?”
“I bet my kid will be born before yours,” Dylan answers, only somewhat joking.
“Oh, you’re on, dude.”
-
As nurses and the doctor rushes around you, frantically assessing the baby while helping you with the afterbirth, birthing the placenta and ridding the bodily fluids that came out with the infant. Eddie cut the cord, watching carefully as the nurses quickly washed his newborn son off.
He’s simultaneously whispering sweet nothings against your cheek, how proud he is of you, describing your son’s dark hair, his little mouth opening as the nurse's hand gently washes it. “Did so good, baby, so good, I’m so fucking proud of you.”
“Is he okay?” You whisper, eyes half open as you stare up at your husband’s brown ones. “J-Josh, is he okay?”
Eddie knows exactly what you’re asking, making sure his limbs are working, that he looks healthy, that the nurses don’t look too concerned about their results. He can’t help but answer, “He’s perfect.”
Your favorite nurse, the one who got assigned after Eddie demanded it, brings him over swaddled in a hospital blanket and tucks him into your arms. The hormones and adrenaline overwhelm you as you stare at his face, selfishly grateful he looks just like his father, happily staring at the little button nose.
“I love you,” when you stare up at your husband, you’re expecting his eyes to also be planted on the newest member of the little family. Instead they’re shiny and planted on you, his expression drenched in pure love.
“I love you,” you sigh, leaning in for a sweet kiss. “He’s so perfect.”
“I fucking love you so much.”
The love fest eventually dies down, all the medical aides surrounding you finishing up and leaving the room as they steal one last glance at the happy little family.
You’re lost in your own little world when Dylan runs in, seeing the little addition sat on your chest. Eddie looks up to face Dylan dressed in a hospital gown and a hairnet. His face is lit up with the same joy as the room is filled with. “You wanna meet your grandson?”
Eddie nods, quickly stopped by his wife still lying on the bed sitting in the afterglow. “Go,” you insist, petting at the soft hair on your son. “Say hi for me.”
He smiles, placing a gentle kiss on your knotted hair, followed by his newborn. “Be right back.”
On the way over to the emergency surgery room Dylan explains that the umbilical cord ended up twisted around his son’s neck and they took Maya straight into an emergency C-Section. He sat with his girlfriend as they emptied the contents of her abdomen to allow the newest Munson to come into the world.
Eddie asked several times to make sure it was okay if her father in law, her boyfriend’s father, to go into a room where she is this vulnerable. Dylan insisted that she said it was fine and since Eddie was here for the birth of his son it would be cool for him to meet his grandson, too, within the same half hour.
Miraculously, after getting in his own scrubs, Eddie wanders in with Dylan as Maya is finished with her stitches. She’s still loopy from the general anesthesia, holding her newborn on her partially covered chest.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” Eddie asked, knowing how against visitors you were.
“Just come say hi to your grandson, Eddie,” Maya chuckles, passing up the newborn. “Meet Jace Edward Munson.”
“Edward?” Eddie laughs, barely holding the mist that comes to his eyes. “What?”
Dylan scrunches his nose, tilting his head to face the newborn now in his father’s arms. “You stepped up when she left. You were everything to me. You may have stolen a girlfriend, but that is small beans in the grand scheme of things, you know?”
“Jace and Josh,” Eddie muses, laughter bubbling up his throat. “God, they even sound like twins.”
-
Kayla smooths over the dress she wears, nervously looking around the classroom. Are there enough learning centers set up? Will the children like the home center she put together? Will there be any difficult teachers during her first year?
For the first time, she’s on her own, placed in the very class she had spent so long working toward, kindergarten.
Her little classmates with their parents, usually mothers, wander in with wide eyes, nervously holding onto their sleeves and looking around anxiously. She talks to each little one at a time, welcoming them and offering them many activities to distract them from wanting to stay with their parents.
One little boy doesn’t need much, or any, peeling off his father as he runs in, his shaggy brown hair rustling in as he bolts straight to the building blocks. His dad walks in right after, carrying his bag dressed in a leather jacket and acid wash jeans.
“Hi,” he sighs, sounding tired. “That’s Dylan.”
“M or H?” Kayla asks.
“M.”
“Dylan, can you grab your bag from your dad and put it in the cubby?” Dylan runs to grab his bag from his dad, shouting in slight frustration as he’s pulled in for a hug. “Yours will have an M next to your name!”
He listens, but doesn’t look back as he runs back to the blocks.
“I’m Eddie,” the father says, holding his hand out. “His mom, Brooke, will pick him up after school, uh, she’s a bit of a hardass, so just beware.”
Oh, goody. She gives him a strained smile, insisting she’ll be able to handle it.
Eddie and Dylan end up being one of his favorite pairings for the year. But when Brooke walked in, she knew it became a big deal for something as small as Dylan putting his book in the wrong pocket in his bag.
Kayla got along great with Eddie, as they turned out to be the same age. They saw one another around the school as Dylan got older, even became someone Dylan could rely on for a maternal figure when his parents ended up divorcing in fifth grade.
About twenty one years after initially teaching Dylan, she’s a veteran teacher in her own right, having a monopoly over classroom #3 as she continues to be the answer for dozens of individuals when asked their favorite teacher.
She sits in her lumbar chair that her coworkers raised the money for the previous Christmas as she finally is able to look over her newest class list. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary until she came across 9th and 8th from the last name, two boys with J initials and the last name Munson. She’d been wondering if she would ever have the pleasure of teaching Dylan’s boys, or if he decided to skip town like most of his classmates.
Their birthday right next to their attendance names indicated they had the same birthdate, so she was safe to assume she would have another set of twins. If they were anything like Dylan, they would be a fun sort of challenge for her, that she was sure of.
On the first day the following fall, she keeps an eye out for her former student, keeping in mind it could very well be the mother that decides to drop them off.
As she’s helping a particularly shy child settle into her classroom, she notices a parent helping their kid out of the wind breaker they’re wearing. As soon as the little girl is settled she goes to them welcoming them. She immediately recognizes the parent. “Dylan!”
“Oh, Miss. Thompson! I didn’t realize you were still teaching!” He sheepishly admits, looking at the plaque now containing her married name.
“I am just married, now,” she answers, answering him the same way she would a student out of habit. “Now, who do we have here?”
“I’m Jace,” the little boy answers shyly, brown hair of this father but stark green eyes.
“Well, Jace, would you mind finding your name at one of the cubbies for me? I think you’re put right next to someone named Josh,” she tells him, watching for any recognition of the other name she thought was his twin.
“Oh, sweet!” Jace exclaims, running with his Pokémon bag.
She gets up from her squatting position, her knees far too achy for doing it continually like she still is. “So, there’s another Munson on the class list, would you know anything about that?”
Dylan chuckles, sighing. “Well, about that–” Dylan is interrupted by a little boy with dark hair hugging him, exclaiming his name. “Hey, Josh, we were just talking about you!”
Josh laughs, tugging on Dylan’s arm. “Is Jace here?”
“Yeah, he’s playing with the dinosaurs, if I know him.”
“Cool!” Josh runs straight off, meeting his supposed relative at the play carpet.
Kayla turns around in confusion, questioning what just happened.
As if answering her, in comes another familiar face, holding a bag that looks comically small compared to his tall stature. “Ah, Kayla. I was wondering if you were still here.”
“Eddie!” She greets him, giving a very frank hug. “I have to admit, I am very confused.”
“That’s okay, you wouldn’t be the first,” Eddie comments, crossing his arms. “Me and my wife had Josh at the same time Dylan had Jace. They’re assholes, they like to gang up on adults, but don’t let them intimidate you, they can’t with their adults anymore, so they try it on teachers.”
“Takes a lot more than that to intimidate me,” Kayla answers, looking back at the boys who gained ownership over the carpet with dinosaurs and cars. “I appreciate the warning, though.” She looks back to her old friend, seeing the smile lines on his face, still carrying his son’s things. “I’m happy you found someone, though.”
“Thanks. His mom will pick him up after school,” Eddie tells her, going to the cubby with his kid’s name on it. “She’s not as bad as Brooke, so there’s no worries, there.”
“Alright, can’t wait to meet her.”
Eddie and Dylan share a look, one that Kayla misses as she starts to welcome in a few new classmates.
-
The bell rings for lunch for the rest of the elementary school and end of day for the kindergarteners. Mrs. Franklin, or Miss. Thompson, as Dylan knows her, helps all her students with their backpacks and jackets. It’s one thing to manage five-year-olds, it’s another to get them to stop wrestling and help them simultaneously.
The Munson boys are certainly no help, Josh trying to stick his finger up Jace’s nose, pinning him down on the dirty floor as Jace wiggles underneath him. Kayla wished Josh would stop telling Jace he’s his uncle and he has to listen to him, that way she wouldn’t have to hold back her laughter so hard.
“Okay, Mr. and Mr. Munson, break it up, your parents will be here any minute now. Get up.” They both switch their glances up to her, eyebrows raised over wide eyes. “Get up.”
They roll their eyes, Josh reluctantly getting off Jace slowly and helping him up. Slowly but surely, parents start to pick their kids up, both Munsons waiting for their parents anxiously. You wonder in with your youngest, a little three year old by the name of Stevie. She holds onto your pointer and middle finger anxiously, eyes darting around at the unfamiliar noises and faces.
Your son is seemingly nowhere to be seen, usually seen with his counterpart but you can’t see him around the crowd of parents kneeling with their kids and asking how their day was. The teacher, someone both Dylan and Eddie insisted is the best in the school, approaches you kindly to ask which kid is yours.
Before you can even answer Josh runs into you, happily glancing up at you as he wraps his arms around your legs. “Hi, baby,” you greet him, kneeling down as you pet his sweet face.
You miss the peculiar look Mrs. Franklin, or Kayla as Eddie referred to her as, gives you. Surprised to say the least that the Mrs. Munson she has yet to meet is so young. Her brows furrow even further when Jace notices you, yelling, “Grandma!” as he also runs for a hug.
“Were you boys nice to Mrs. Franklin today?”
“Of course!” Josh smiles, and you squint through his bullshit.
“Well we’re gonna make sure to be nicer or we’re gonna have to lose our tablet privileges, won’t we?”
You get back up, smiling at their grumbly faces. They never listen to new adults, it was a field day at their first day of preschool. One glance to their teacher’s observant face told you all you needed to know. “Eddie didn’t warn you, he?”
“No, but they did have a peculiar look on their faces when I mentioned meeting you. Should’ve known better, with those two,” you tilt your head, curious at what she meant. “Seriously, your husband needs to tell you more. I taught Dylan when he was in kindergarten.”
“Oh!” you exclaim, somewhat surprised. “That’s really cool! Were you surprised to see Eddie wi–”
“With another kid,” she interrupts, laughing, “yes, I was. I’m happy to see that he found someone else, Brooke, was, well, she was not a nice person.”
Your eyebrows raise at the mention of your husband’s ex-wife, this being the first person she meets outside Eddie’s inner circle to having even mentioned Brooke. “So, I’ve heard.”
“Hey mom,” you hear behind you, you shove the owner before you even see him, rolling your eyes.
It’s very recently become a silly habit of Dylan’s to call you mom, due to your son asking why his brother calls his mom by her real name and not mom like he does. After the best attempt at explaining Dylan has a different mom who is no longer around, Josh is still confused and insists that you still act like his mom, so therefore, are Dylan’s mom.
It was awkward at first, but now it’s a little inside joke. If you were told when you first got together with Eddie that Dylan would be referring to you as a maternal figure, you probably would’ve hit them on the head for fucking with you.
“Hey, kiddo,” you tease back, mocking his twisted face expression. “They were apparently giving her a hard time today.”
“Of course they were. You know we can ask one of you to switch classes, right?” Dylan asks, an aura of authority in his voice.
Their eyes go wide, even though it was a threat in their preschool room, they have yet to consider this. You didn’t want to resort to threats but with their shenanigans, it's literally one of the only things that will work.
“C’mon, your dad is making your favorite for dinner,” your shoulder cascades around Josh’s shoulder, telling him to say bye to his nephew and that he’ll see him tomorrow.
Two years later, Stevie shows up with her dark curls down to her shoulders after her father, giggling as she says hi to the teacher.
That was the last time Kayla taught one of Eddie Munson’s kids. Or, so she assumed.
-
The double doors to the high school flew open, big black boots echoing as the large leather jacket trails behind a slim torso. He takes the immediate left into the office, his presence large, with grey streaks leaking into his roots and an angry look on his face.
The kind administration lady looks up to his expectant face, the curiosity quickly melting into confounded terror. “Can I help you?”
“Apparently Stevie Munson is in the office right now?” Better be a damn good reason for peeling me away from one of the only moments I have left alone with my wife, he thinks, eyes observing around the office.
“Yes, she is, uh, are you her–”
“Her father, are you going to let me in the office or do I have to let myself in?”
The surprise that fills her features would be charming if Eddie wasn’t so fucking annoyed. He’s used to the assumption by now, but for the moment he just doesn’t have any patience in his body.
“You can go right ahead, Mr. Munson,” she peeps out, gesturing to the door marked Principal. Eddie’s not sure why he even asked, or how he had the foresight to ask, first. He’s surprised, honestly.
The door opens to face the school principal, his daughter and a boy sitting two seats away from her nursing his face with an ice pack. “Mr. Munson, welcome in! Have a seat.”
“No thanks,” Eddie answers, polite, but curt. He looks at his daughter, “What happened?”
She opens her mouth to answer but is interrupted by the bald principal, “I didn’t ask you, I asked her. What happened?” He directs his attention back to his daughter.
She smiles at him, the same sweet smile his wife bares. “This guy touched my ass under my skirt, so I punched him in the face.”
Eddie’s brows raised, teeth gritted as he sends a daggers at the boy he is now aware assaulted his daughter. “I’m sorry?” He asks, now directed to the principal.
“So she says,” the principal says, eyes widening at how Eddie manages to look murderous. “Granted, even if Mr. Jackson did do that, it’s not a good enough reason to assault him. She will be suspended for two days.”
Eddie laughs, loudly, shaking his head at the gall, the fucking nerve. This principal is extremely lucky it was him who answered his phone and not you. “Really? My daughter got sexually assaulted and your reaction to her defending herself is suspending her? Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Mr. Munson, if you could please calm down and have a seat,” he starts, gesturing to the chair, yet again.
“Oh, I am calm. You don’t want to see me angry,” Eddie answers, the Hulk flashing through his mind. “You deciding to punish her tells me exactly why this little shit felt confident enough to lay his hands on her, to begin with. I just think about all the other girls he’s done this to, too afraid to speak up, I wonder how many times he’s done this with no consequence to feel confident enough to touch under a skirt. What the fuck is this place? No-tolerance bullying policy? Utter bullshit.”
“Mr. Munson, calm down before I call security–”
“Don’t make me laugh. Seriously. Don’t.” Eddie sighs, pinching his nose. “If you do suspend her, I will press charges against him and I will sue this fucking school. If you punish him, like you’re supposed to, take him off his team for the season, put him in detention for a month, I don’t care, something with fucking consequences, I won’t. You decide.”
He looks down at the little shit, whimpering as he still nurses the barely there bruise. “You better hope I don’t hear you doing this shit to any other girl in this school, or you won’t get into any college in the country.” He pauses, opening the office door to an audience. Maybe he was louder than he thought he was. “C’mon Stevie, let’s go get some fucking ice cream.”
When you heard about how your husband stuck up for your daughter like that, you got on your knees for him in the bathroom. That might’ve cheered him up a bit.
-
The sounds are familiar yet foreign when you wake up to the blindingly white room, the chatter in the hallway and some heart monitor beeping. Two people immediately come into focus, Josh, sitting at the end of the bed on his phone, Stevie sitting concerned by your head.
You moan, sitting up in your bed annoyed at the stark contrast of the back of your eyelids. “What the hell?”
“Mom!” Josh shouts, getting up and standing on the other side of his sister.
“Mom,” Stevie runs out of the room, calling for a doctor.
You look to your son, brows furrowed. “What happened?”
“You passed out at the grocery store. You fainted and you didn’t wake up until just now.”
Your brows raise, because you haven’t felt off even the slightest. The dizziness hit you out of nowhere, going from fine to woozy in two seconds and falling flat on your face. “How long ago did that happen?”
“Like twenty minutes? The ambulance got there pretty quickly,” he admits, turning his head to his sister and the nurse coming in the door.
“Mrs. Munson! So glad to see you awake. I’ll let the doctor know and he should be able to give your results,” she says, sweet smile as she turns away.
Stevie’s bottom lip is stuck out, quivering as she grabs the hand containing an IV line. You thought that was a bit much. “Stevie, I’m okay.”
“Are you sure, because I heard the nurses saying it’s not normal to stay out that long after fainting. What if you’re sick?”
“I’m okay,” you insist, watching both their worried faces. “Fuck, you called your dad, didn’t you?”
“Uh, yes! He would’ve killed us if we didn’t!” Josh laughs, leaning back in his chair.
As if summoned, your husband pokes his head in, his eyes wide as he walks in the room, hands out to you as his long legs take him to the head of the bed. “Fucking Christ.”
“Hi, baby,” you greet him, leaning into the forehead kiss that he gives you. “I’m okay.”
“Fainting in the fucking grocery store, fucking hell. My god, baby.” He looks over to his kids, “What tests have they done, so far?”
“Just a blood test, I think,” Stevie shrugs.
“They might do an MRI but that could take weeks of waiting.” Josh offers no comfort to his dad despite his best efforts.
“I’m okay, really.” You insist to all their worried faces. “You didn’t call anyone else, did you?”
“Uh, we called Dylan,” Josh says, wincing at your annoyed face. “And Jace.”
“Fuck,” you mutter, intertwining your hand with Eddie’s rough one.
The doctor doesn’t come as quickly as the nurse promised, but he comes within two hours. “Oh, hello, you have quite the visitors, don’t you?”
You shrug, rubbing his thumb as it anxiously rubs your hand.
“We have the results, inconclusively.” The air is tense, every one of the family seemingly expecting terrible news. “Congrats! You’re pregnant.”
You knew nothing was wrong, but this was not what you were expecting. You’re forty-two, Eddie is nearly seventy. You weren’t even sure he could still get you pregnant. You meet your husband’s eyes, sharing a bewildered smile.
In the meantime, shouts of disgust from your teenage kids fill the room, standing up with tense shoulders.
“Gross!”
“Ew! I didn’t even know you guys still did it! Oh my god! Ew!!!!”
You bite your lip, shrugging. “Are you wanting to be a father to a newborn at almost 70?”
Eddie smirks, leaning in for a kiss that makes your kids jeer again. “Bring it on, baby.”
Steve calls an hour later, concerned for the text his name sake sent him. When Eddie informs him, you’re pregnant, twenty years of karma hits tenfold.
When Steve and Jocelyn said they were pregnant with Eliza fifteen years after having Dustin, Eddie spent the pregnancy making fun of their oopsie baby. Asking if they knew what protection was, joking how they still had sex, telling them to keep it in their pants, the works.
Now, Steve was more than happy to return the favor. “A baby at 70, you old bastard? What was that you told me twenty years ago? God, I’m surprised you two still do it, considering how low Eddie’s ball sack must be hanging.”
“You wish you could see my ball sack, you asshole,” Eddie teases, laughing with you as you sigh. “You’re just jealous I can still keep it up, you geriatric bastard.”
-
Five years later, when Eddie and Kayla are older, he wanders into classroom #3 for the last time, holding his third son who ends up being notoriously clingy towards his older father.
It’s ironic to the both of them how Eddie has a son for both Kayla’s first and last year of teaching, keeping tabs on one another for the duration of forty years.
Eddie doesn’t say anything, letting Tommy down and dismissing her questioning look. Don’t wanna talk about it.
By the time Tommy is 18, Eddie is too old to give a shit, wondering constantly what Wayne’s opinion will be when he ends up knocking on heaven’s door.
When you got into your sixties, Eddie was full of gratitude, thankful that you will no longer be confused for one of his kids despite his actual kids all calling you mom. He makes fun of your vision, stealing his reading glasses constantly despite his constant insisting that you get your own pair.
Despite the smile lines by his lips and his eyes, the sunspots decorating his skin, you still stare up at him like you did when he was forty-seven.
Your lives were forever intertwined from the moment you saw him, from the moment he saw you. He lies down in your bed next to you for the millionth time, his hand caressing your side, pressing kisses on whiskered lips, it doesn’t occur to you to ever be anything less than woefully in love with him.
———————-
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i want to expand on this post just cause i can.
so much of gus and jesse’s relationship is played as an affair. this is only because it makes walt’s anger about their dynamic feel more jilted, like a lover. when he confronts jesse about the two of them having dinner he uses language an excusatory husband would use if he caught his spouse cheating such as “tell me you weren’t as his house last night?” it’s very clearly written as jesse being disloyal to walt and their partnership. now the audience knows that’s just simply not true with jesse literally saying “if you kill mr. white, you’re going to have to kill me too” when he thinks gus is suggesting killing him. he’s devoted to mr. white throughly. even when he’s being shoved into these new situations by mike and gus, there’s never a moment where he thinks about abandoning him. he’s still in the back of his mind through everything, and every character knows this except for walt. that’s what makes most of the build-up leading to gus’s death so ironic. to walt, gus is the other woman who needs to be killed for fraternizing with what’s “his”. in reality, it’s his own brutality and sadistic behavior that is putting a wedge between him and jesse.
it’s very reminiscent of walt finding out about skyler’s affair with ted. he lashes out and throws a tantrum but he never stops for a second and asks why it happened. he never comes to the conclusion that his actions are what’s driving skyler into another’s arms. he plots to get revenge on ted, but it’s never more serious than toxic masculine how-dare-you-sleep-with-my-wife bullshit. he wants to kill him, i don’t doubt that, but he can’t. how can he? killing, torturing, and all that depravity belongs in the “heisenberg” part of his life. he cannot touch ted because he is as mundane as the life he is fronting.
now, i will admit, the skyler affair storyline and jesse’s so-called adultery are really not that similar at all. like i said, jesse is not betraying anyone--he is still fiercely dedicated to mr. white. his unfaithfulness is only interpreted as much by walt himself, and it’s walt’s delusions drive him away in the first place. skyler cheats as a means of revenge, as a way to take back some autonomy that walt had stripped her of. however, it’s the way that walt handles these individual perfidies that’s so captivating to me. when deciding what to do with gus, he immediately decides he needs to kill him. this was his plan prior, but now it’s more dire. jesse is gone. he needs to kill two birds with one stone: win back jesse and kill gus. more importantly, he needs to show jesse that him killing gus was something he did for the both of them. so thus he embarks on this convoluted, deplorable, fucked-up scheme. and hey! it works. he successfully manipulates jesse once again, implanting in his brain that no one will have your best interests at heart but me. “gus had to go” and jesse has to agree because this pseudo-son is dying and mr. white is right there and he saved him right? he saved brock and he saved jesse and it doesn’t matter that their love has a body count. their reunion is so impactful because they’re like magnets in a way. the connection they share is so strong that it doesn’t matter how hard they fight or run away, they will cling to each other once more. but what’s devastating this time around is that jesse doesn’t have a leg to stand on with mr. white anymore. he almost fucking killed him and it turns out the “real” mastermind was gus all along. so he offers his submission as an apology, when mr. white holds out his hand he takes it because this is how he can say he’s sorry. and walt? how could he not fall in love all over again. he has jesse, freshly martyred and in his arms once again.
#i found this in my drafts#tbh i cooked#i miss being able to watch breaking bad without crying#now i can't look at jesse's baby blues without fucking sobbing up a storm#takes me 2 days now to finish one episode#waltjesse#walter white#jesse pinkman#brba#Breaking Bad#Aaron Paul#bryan cranston
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