#magical nerds should stay together

[witchcraftandgeekness]

After successfully invented spell

Kol: You are supposed to bang your fist against mine.

Freya: Why?

Kol: I am told it is widely accepted gesture for mutual success.

Rebekah: I love it when you two impersonate normal people.

[dbphantom]

could not sleep because the mental image of a magical girl holding her beam-firing wand like a grenade launcher would not leave my head so obviously i had to draw my oc doing exactly that

i am content now.

[hellfirenacht]

Crit Happens: Session 0

Fic Summary: You are who’s Dustin’s favorite cousin from out of town who is staying with him for the summer. Eddie finds himself jealous as he's suddenly been pushed aside as Dustin’s favorite dungeon master. When Dustin insists that Eddie join the campaign, you and Eddie quickly butt heads about how Dungeons and Dragons should be played.

Master List

2.2k words

May, 1986

Session 0

The air in the drama room was hot and stagnant as the members of Hellfire held their breath. One Erica Sinclair held the D20 between her palms, shaking her cupped hands together, while everyone stared at her in anticipation of the drop that would tell them if the campaign that they had been working through all semester had been for naught. 

Eddie’s eyes narrowed and he found himself standing taller to look over his DM screen as the die fell from her grasp, tumbling and rolling to decide the fate of the party. Two weeks ago, he had damn near thrown a fit over the idea of pushing back the finale of The Cult of Vecna out by a week, but he was no longer regretting that decision after spending his spring break working and reworking his notes until he was ready to kill Vecna himself from the frustration. 

The older Sinclair stood behind his sister, gripping her shoulders tightly, while Dustin and Will held Lucas’s. Actually, if Eddie hadn’t been staring so hard at the die as it clacked along the squares of his map, he would have seen all of Hellfire cleaning to each other, and he would have absolutely made fun of them. 

Not now though. 

The die hit the small podium that Eddie had spent an afternoon putting together to set Vecna on top of. The mini-fig shifted just slightly under Eddie’s hawk-like gaze before toppling over. A fitting end as the die settled on the magic number. 

“Nat 20!” Erica yelled, smiling wide with an excitement for the game that made Eddie nostalgic for his days as a player. Immediately, the room erupted in cheers and jumping as the members of Hellfire celebrated. 

Eddie jumped up, and clapped his hands, hardly able to believe what he was seeing.

Two weeks ago, Lucas begged him to postpone Hellfire. Two weeks ago Lucas had told Eddie that he could guarantee a passing grade for O’Donnels if he would postpone this one time. Lucas swore that he could get Eddie the best math tutor in Hawkins. 

Now, said tutor had just rolled a Nat 20 and was being hailed as a hero amongst the party that Eddie had been guiding for the past school year. 

It could have brought a tear to his eye, knowing that Hellfire had beaten his campaign, and now he was set to walk the stage in a week to graduate. 

“That’s why we play!” Eddie declared, dramatically bowing to Erica, who stood proud as the rest of the group high-fived and jumped around. 

“Erica, you’re joining Hellfire officially when you get to high school, right?” Will asked. 

“We’ll see if I want to join this nerd club in a year.” Erica said, as if that hadn’t been part of the deal with Eddie postponing Hellfire for Lucas’s game. 

The night wound down, as members reluctantly were picked up by their parents. Eddie himself was stalling as he cleaned up the board for the last time. He had always known that this day would come, that there would be a last Hellfire meeting, a final campaign, one last adventure. He knew that, but never really believed that it would happen until he was folding up his DM screen and sliding it into his beat up backpack. 

Eddie already promised himself that he wouldn’t ever enter the grounds of Hawkins High again once that diploma was in his hands. There had been talk amongst his band-mates about setting up a game for just Corroded Coffin, but nothing set in stone yet. 

He watched as most of the group headed up the stairs and towards the door, until it was just the freshmen huddled in a corner and whispering to each other in a hushed and excited tone. 

Curiosity got the better of Eddie, it always did. He walked over to the little sheep and crossed his arms. “And what’s the big secret?” he asked. 

The boys jumped slightly, and they all looked like they were stuffing something in their pockets or subtly trying to hide something, which only made Eddie more curious. 

“We were just deciding who was going to be the dungeon master next semester!” Mike said, a little too fast, but it was a good alibi for now. The older members of the band had never shown too much of an interest in running the game, but Eddie knew that Mike and Will had swapped around being the DM long before joining Hellfire. 

This did interest Eddie though, and he was willing to ignore whatever secret that the children were holding for the moment. He knew this was an important decision for the fate of the club. “And who among you thinks they are worthy of being my successor?” He asked, crossing his arms over his chest. 

Dustin took a step forward. “I do.” he said.

Eddie’s lips stretched into a grin as he looked down at his favorite freshman (though he’d never admit it out loud). Had it been up to Eddie, he would have picked Henderson himself. Maybe Will was a close second, with his passion for the game above all else. 

“So, Dustin the Bard thinks that he is good enough to tell the tale of Hellfire for the future generations?” Eddie asked. 

“I know I’m good enough.” Dustin replied. “I learned from the best.” 

Eddie hadn’t expected such a sentiment from the kid, and for a second his expression softened. For the past year, Dustin had constantly talked about how great and amazing Steve Harrington was, practically worshiped the jock much to Eddie’s confusion. But knowing that Dustin really did think highly of him as well, melted a part of Eddie’ cynical old heart. 

“When is she coming in anyway?” Will asked, looking at Dustin. 

...Who?

Dustin’s head snapped over at Will with a glare, the Byers kid had a shit eating grin. 

“She’ll be coming in next week.” Dustin said through his teeth. “But that’s not important right now.”

Eddie didn’t consider himself a nosy person, but he was. He was about to leave Hawkins High and Hellfire forever, and these children were being cryptic and weirder than usual. 

Dustin turned back to Eddie. “I’ll be running the next campaign.” he tried again. “I already have a lot of ideas.”

“Well, Henderson, you’re in luck.” Eddie said. “I’ll have some free time on my hands this summer, I think if you’re going to live up to my legacy then you should at least get the proper training.” 

Eddie’s mouth was going faster than his brain with the idea. It’s not something that he would have offered to anyone else, and truth be told he didn’t know why he was suddenly feeling the need to hang out with anyone other than his band over the summer.  

It didn’t have anything to do with the fact that after he had that diploma in hand he would be even more lost than he was within the walls of this prison of a school. Nothing to do with Wayne talking about getting him a job at the plant after graduation or the fact that suddenly Grant, Gareth, and Jeff had summer plans with their families which would cut into Corroded Coffin’s rehearsal and stage time. 

No, it had nothing to do with any of that. It was out of the kindness of Eddie’s heart that he was willing to guide his sheep into one last adventure to prepare them for the new year and new challenges that they would have to face without the mean and scary freak of Hawkins High protecting them. This was all only for the future of Hellfire. 

Dustin looked confused, looking to Mike and Lucas for support but they looked like they were holding back laughter. 

Were they laughing at Eddie? After all he’d done for them over the past year? Keeping them relatively safe from bullies, letting them join Hellfire?

Lucas slapped Dustin on the shoulder with a smirk. “See you later. Good luck.” he said before him, Mike, and Will practically bolted up the stairs and out the door. 

This kept getting weirder and weirder. 

“So you want to train me...?” Dustin asked, turning his attention to Eddie after nearly setting the staircase on fire with his glare. 

“Think of it like ‘Dungeon Master Boot Camp’.” Eddie said, though he sounded more confident than he felt after that weird exchange. 

He couldn’t fully blame the freshmen either, it’s not like he had ever asked to hang out with them outside of school or Hellfire. The closest had been Grant’s birthday party, and the two times they had all gone to the arcade together as a club. 

“About that I- uh.” Dustin was holding onto a piece of paper in his hands, fiddling with it. “I’ll actually be living with the person who taught us D&D this summer and they said that they’d help me- but you can help,too!” 

Eddie’s face must have betrayed some form of emotion with how quickly Dustin had added in that last part. He tried to brush off that odd feeling of disappointment, it didn’t matter anyway. This was just something Eddie was offering to kill time during the summer due to boredom. No other reason.

“And who exactly taught you to play?” Eddie asked, crossing his arms. It was no secret that the kids knew how to play before joining Hellfire, but he had always assumed that they had learned the same way he had; by sneaking into bookstores and libraries and writing down as much of the rules as he could until he could finally put together enough money to buy his own copy of the players handbook. It hadn’t occurred to him that someone would have taught anyone in that group. 

“My cousin.” Dustin said. “She doesn’t live here, but she used to come up for summer break before going to college. My cousin was the one to bring me the books and got me into the game and then we just played a campaign every time they visited.” 

There was something about the way Dustin was talking that made Eddie feel like he was trying to hide something from him. 

“And so this cousin of yours is coming back to visit for the summer and will be, what, teaching you how to play again?” Eddie raised an eyebrow. 

“No! No, she’s just gonna run a campaign for us!” Dustin said, incredulously before sighing and showing Eddie the piece of paper that everyone had been poorly trying to hide. He snatched the paper out of Dustin’s hand and looked it over. 

It was about the size of a chocolate bar, with ADMIT ONE TO THE CARNIVAL OF LOST SOULS on the front. When flipped over, it looked like an invitation to some sort of demented carnival, with doodles of ghosts and gross clowns and rancid looking carnival food. Dustin's’ address was scrawled in a drippy red ink across the back as well as a date and time. 

Eddie was both impressed and confused. 

“What is this?” 

“That’s the invitation we all got to be part of the campaign.” Dustin said. “My cousin really gets into theme.” 

Eddie kept looking at the ticket. It glowed just slightly in the dim light of the drama room. Was that glow paint? 

Yes. Yes it was. 

“Carnival of Lost Souls.” Eddie read slowly. Was that a new module? 

“It’s an adventure they made up. I don’t think they even use any module or even Faerune for the campaigns.” 

What kind of blasphemy was this?

“And you want this person to train you to be the dungeon master for Hellfire?” Eddie was unimpressed. 

“Yes- I mean no- I-”

Eddie was finding joy in the way Dustin was floundering. The kid was usually quick on his feet and sharp witted, fitting for a bard, but now he seemed backed into a corner. 

“Join the campaign.” Dustin finally blurted out. “You don’t get to ever play, right? Come join the campaign and then I can learn from both of you!”

That was a tempting offer. Eddie had been trying to get Corroded Coffin to schedule weekly D&D during the summer, but as it stood they’d be lucky to even meet up for rehearsals. 

Eddie looked down again at the ticket. Henderson seemed to really have faith in this person, and when was the last time Eddie got to play outside of the occasional one shot? Very rarely. 

“Keep the ticket.” Dustin said. “Just bring that with you and I’ll make sure you get in.” 

“Is this a secret club, or something?” Eddie shoved the ticket in his lunch box. 

Dustin shrugged “My cousin always likes to go all out.” 

“Dustin, you’re mom’s looking for you!” Will called down the stairs. 

“Shit. Coming!” Dustin called back up. “Eddie, come join us if you want. I can show you what I’m working on for next year and you can actually play for once.”

Eddie wasn’t given a chance to answer as Dustin ran up the stairs, leaving him alone in the drama room. 

He watched the door close and looked around the room that had been a safe-haven for the past few years. It was a bittersweet feeling, Eddie had always hid inside of the game and his band, being given a few precious hours a week to be more than what this school and town thought of him. Here, he could be a hero, a rock star, a somebody. When he finally got that diploma in the next two weeks and ran off that stage, what was Eddie running to? 

---

Welcome to my new series! I'm doing a lot of research on D&D and the satanic panic for this, so I hope you all enjoy <3

[evilminji]

Okay, But, >.> Listen...

So MAYBE, just MAYBE, I am an incureable RoFan Isekai nerd. Shut up about it, maybe. What're you a cop? Mind your business. BUT! And hear me out...

W...What would actually? HAPPEN if Danny went into a Visual Novel? Some Otome game? You know, aside from being vague flustered by and then DEEPLY ALARMED by these walking Red Flag Fruitloops that girls are supposed to find "dreamy" or something?

Like we know how MMOs work for him. And probably OTHER open world games? But a visual novel? Would it be like the Christmas Episode? Would he hear narration? Be stuck in static "scenes"? Or would it be like a cut together "only the interesting parts" movie that he's somehow IN?

Like?? At SOME point his curiosity is gonna get the best of him. He's gonna want to know what different video games are LIKE on the inside? What's Pong like? Tetris? Mario? One of those Mama's cooking games? Etc etc.

He probably hits up a game sale. Buys a box or two. Figures he can always resell um or just give them away for free. Might even use them for parts. Who knows. And?

It's kinda cool!

It's even SCIENCE! See? Tucker's in charge of notes. Sam's in charge of hilarious commentary and pizza. Jazz is keeping them from drinking and doing ghost shit (terrible combination, we never speak of What Happened(tm) again). And the Dr's. Fenton got distracted by making fudge and debating what games should be counted towards which categories.

They've made an afternoon of it.

And NOW? They've reached the bottom of box one. It was "Survive The Villainess! My Rose for You!" Or... judging by Sam's climbing eyebrows and growing scowl? A DEEPLY unpleasant porn game about school girls.

You could not PAY him enough.

Yeah, he DOES realistically kinda want to know what happens.. if.. like? You know... sexy games... like would he? Or does he just WATCH or...? *awkward cough* But! That's NOT for Family Science Night! And DEFINITELY not THAT game, THANKS.

He'll find himself an ETHICALLY SOURCED smutty game full of consensual boning. For PRIVATE TIME. Those test results are gonna show up like MAGIC and we WILL NOT be talking about them! Got it? Good.

Now what the fuck is he look at here?

Jazz is surprisingly knowledgeable. They are not allowed to ask. They respect it. The main character "wakes up" inside the body of a "villainess" and must survive. Turn her terrible reputation around. Avoid "death flags". Preferably romance one of the hot guys?

Uuuuuuuh... you realize Danny's in a committed relationship, right?

Sam and Turker allow it. But they reserve the right to blast his taste in Fantasy Guy's. Chose carefully, for their roasting shall be BRUTAL. Luuuuuv yoooou~♡

He wants a divorce. They're not even MARRIED and he wants a divorce. You see how they mock him, Jazz? The cruelty he suffers? He's taking the Blobs and moving to Frightknight's. They always warned him about you living folks and your fast ways, but he didn't listen! *continued dramatics* *is smacked with a pillow*

But actually going IN? The weirdly, vaguely European over the top EVERYTHING? Giant jewels and ridiculous, fancy dresses? The walking red flag Romantic Archtype Leads? He wants to PUNCH half these guys! This is ABUSE! Are people OKAY!?

Like? I feel like he'd stay way, WAY longer then he needed too? Just out of morbid curiosity? W-where is this plot GOING? It's so dramatic. Why is my dress MORE dramatic now? Why is everything so... Sparkly.

It would be? AMAZING and baffling and I would pay real money to hear their live commentary. "Why not simply judo flip the crown prince off the balcony, then take over the country, sweetie?" "Solid plan, honey! He deserves it!" Beautiful. Flawless. Sage advice really. Too bad Danny can barely walk in his five million bows dress.

It's the BEST Au and I might be a genius. Or deeply sleep deprived. Meh. We'll 50/50 it, six of one, half a dozen of another.

@hdgnj @ailithnight @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter

[alphajocklover]

Hello, basic 40 year old flabby, short, wimpy nerd nerd here. Been trying and failing to get fit and transform into a stud since I've been thirteen to no avail. Pretty much decided that that the project is genetic. I don't suppose you can genetically graft me to a hypermasculine dad or maybe a hypermasculine brother so puberty could have dealt me a way different hand?

Huh. I’ll admit, I’ve never really done anything like that before. I mean, I’ve talked about changes that alter someone’s past in previous post, and I performed one myself using time travel (I fucking hate time travel), but what’s you’re asking is so much more intense. You want me to make it so that you grew up with a super manly dad or brother. You want me to make it so your genetics are different, your history is different, so that you’re basically an entirely different person. I’m not sure I’ve ever altered anyone that much before. But… I’m willing to give it a try.

You’re an only child right? And you never knew your dad? Raised only by your mom? Good, that will make this much easier. Now, I should warn you that we’re going to have to be very careful. We’re going to use an artifact that my Uncle left to me. I’ve mentioned him before. I really should tell you all about him one day. Anyways, what we’re using to change you might not look like much, but… it’s very powerful. We need to use it carefully.

Ok, I know what you’re thinking. It’s a little statue of a metal tree. Yes I know I sound crazy but in a world with time travel, an app that turns people into meatheads, and reflections that can swap places with the person they’re reflecting, I think you can give me the benefit of the doubt. The little statuette doesn’t look like much, but it’s one of the most dangerous magic items I own. It’s known as the Family Tree, and it allows the user to, well, alter their family tree. Literally. All you have to do is press your thumb to the wooden base, and the tree grows and changes until it resembles your own family tree, complete with pictures. Then it’s as simple as moving some things around, or adding a picture to the tree. So, let’s get to work.

You asked for a super manly dad, or a super manly brother. But since we’re already changing your family, why not give you both? First let’s change out your deadbeat dad for someone a little more… impressive. A real man, a man’s man, one so muscular and sexy that if he walked out on your mom you’d still thank him for the amazing genetics. But don’t worry, your new dad isn’t going to walk out like the old one. He stayed with your mom (who as it turns out is a real babe with the right man encouraging her), and raised you to be just like him. He taught you how to play sports, how to workout, how to shave your hairy face, even how to make a girl putty in your hands. You were always especially talented at that last one. You’re starting to remember it aren’t you? Everything your dad taught you, how far you pushed yourself because you wanted to make him proud. You especially remember him showing him how to throw a football. In this world you were a natural.

Next is your brother. I don’t wanna give away your identity, or his, so let’s call him Brad. He’s actually your younger brother, not your older brother. You were the one who taught him how to be a man, how to be a stud, and in doing so, became an even better one yourself. As reality changes you remember growing up with him, teaching him the ropes, playing and working out with him. You even remember the girls you’d sometimes fuck together. You remember the first time you and him spitroasted a bimbo, how hot the girl looked and how proud and manly your brother was.

But let’s move on to you. In this life you took after your dad and your little brother, being a natural stud. You were a strong kid, an active kid, but puberty hit you like a dump truck. You shot up, your shoulders widened, and you gained an almost obscene amount of muscle and hair. You’ve got a different personality too. Cocky and confident, a constant flirt and a total bro. You thought you’d never settle down, fucking a different girl every night. Until… you met your wife. Yes, in this world you have a wife. She’s a bit of a bimbo, but the kindest person you’ve ever met. She enchanted you, and soon… while, you were married, and have stayed married for almost 20 years.

You’ve changed your past, your future, and everything about yourself. You’re finally the man you always wanted to be… but your kids are really the lucky ones. They’ve got awesome genetics, killer bodies, and a great dad to show them how to use it, just like how you did growing up.

[turtletaubwrites]

Turtletaub Fic Recs ~ Part 2

I continue to get floored by the amazing and delectable One Piece fics I encounter here, so here's another batch! I hope you enjoy this list as much as I have, and that you go show these incredible writers some love! ~ NSFW Fics will be marked with a 🔥 | Other Fic Rec Lists ~ | Part 1 | Part 3 | Part 4 |

Ace

Ready? 🔥 ~ by @maddddstuff  ~ Here's some oh so fucking good smutty smut. Ace easing you through it 🍑 because he's the perfect, scrumptious guy. I should have waited for a better time to read it, but I couldn't help myself 😅

Barto

Dance Inside 🔥 ~ by @bartosbabymama ~ I love when you have a crush, and now you're sitting in their lap 🥰 He is way too fine, and this is smutty and cute. Barto and his fangs need more love! 💚

Buggy

Please don't say you're gone forever, 'cause I can't hurt no more ~ by @lostfirefly ~ Chapter 1 hit me right in the feels! Such a well written couple's argument that made me want to shake them both, and teach Buggy some communication skills 😭 Chapter 2 was the perfect, sweet conclusion 🥰🤡

I’m full of surprises ~ by @hey-august ~ This is so lovely, and cute, and magical 🥰✨ Feels like letting yourself be free, letting the adventure start. Buggy is so sweet, and I wish his ship had shown up when I needed it.

Crocodile

The Sand Dragon and I 🔥 ~ by @discordantwritings ~ I'm OBSESSED. If you ever read Dealing with Dragons as a kid, get ready for the tastiest adult version of that. 🐲🥵 I would gladly serve Sir Crocodile, I don't even care.

Kid

Calm Down ~ by @sheerxfiction ~ This is fucking adorable, and brought me back to growing up in a hippie stoner town. He's a grump, but all he needed was weed and smooches 🍃🥰 So stinkin' cute, go check it out!

Law

Law Helping You Study 🔥 ~ by @nina-ya ~ Just the sexiest lil study session ever. Law is such a nerd, and has no right being this hot 🥵 Well written smut that I'll definitely read again!

Down the Alley 🔥 ~ by @quinloki ~ VERY inappropriate use of devil fruit powers 🤭 This is so hot! Where is Law when I need him? I need to try this out asap 😭🥵

Mihawk

The Hat Stays ON 🔥 ~ by @sordidmusings ~ Desperate Mihawk desperate Mihawk DESPERATE MIHAWK! This is so flipping hot, go have a read. It is TOO GOOD! 🥵

Multi and/or Character x Character

The Crow's Nest | Zoro x Sanji | ~ by @shewrites02 ~ Such a beautiful, sweet, angsty Zosan fic that made my heart melt! 😭 It’s got Whole Cake Island spoilers, but if you’re caught up, then do yourself a favor and read this! I love them so much, and this wonderfully written fic gave me all the feels 💛💚

Nami

One For Me ~ by @maplekzh ~ This is lovely, and fluffy, and hot! Just the sweetest little moment with Nami x GN!Reader in an established relationship, and I adore how Nami is written here 🍊

Robin

drowning ~ by @oxittocin ~ I love Robin so much, and this is so goood 😭😭 Angsty and sweet, from Robin's POV. It makes me want to wrap her up in a blanket, and make sure she never has another bad day for the rest of her life!

Sanji

Just For One Dance ~ by @gingernut1314 ~ I adored this sweet yearning goodness! It captures one of those rare, magical moments between two people that might not have long together, but will never forget each other. I loved it 🥰

Shanks

Two More Times 🔥 ~ by @fanaticsnail ~ This is insanely good brat taming smut with Daddy Shanks. (Also sweet and lovely because that's our Shanks 🥰) Seriously 🥵🥵🥵 HIGHLY recommend!!!

Zoro

Mean-Mugging ~ by @indydonuts ~ I can't describe how fucking cute this fluffy fic is. I snorted at the Straw Hats antics, then had to immediately go tell my partner about it because it's just so CUTE!! 😭💚 Zoro is so sweet, even if he's scary looking 😅

| masterlist | about me | rules | ao3 |

[hbyrde36]

It's Only Forever

R: Mature | WC: 4931 | | Ch 6/8 | Read on AO3 | Mild Sexual Content

[Penny Art - Eddie's Introduction] [Penny Art Link - The Ball]

[SissayeRys Art Link]

Ch 1 Ch 2 Ch 3 Ch 4 Ch 5

Chapter 6: Magic Dance

Feat. a new art piece by @penny00dreadful!!!!!!!!! 😍

Tick, tock.

The further the unlikely fellowship of strangers-turned-friends got from the bog, the more the trees surrounding them began to fill out. Bare brittle trunks and branches were replaced with dense bark and vibrant leaves.

They were headed into another forest.

Great. 

Thankfully, even as the humidity eased, the air remained warm and free from falling ash—or whatever that stuff had been—and these woods lacked the vague yet distinctly sinister vibe of the last Steve had trekked through. He allowed himself to relax, knowing that, either way, at least he wasn’t alone this time.

“So, what’s in the castle that’s worth going to all this trouble for anyhow?” Jonathan asked from his perch atop Argyle’s shoulder, his poofy tail bobbing with each of the gentle giant’s footsteps.

Steve swallowed hard, the ever present guilt for what he’d done, unintentionally or not, sitting like a lead weight in his gut. “My little brother.”

“Oh,” Jonathan replied softly.

Argyle threw a sideways glance at Steve, smiling without a hint of judgment on his face. “Tell us about him?”

“Dustin—he’s thirteen, a huge dork, and the biggest pain in my ass,” Steve began simply, returning Argyle’s flash of teeth with a grateful smile of his own.  

“But he’s also the best little brother anyone could have. My mom and dad split up when I was really young, and before I knew it, mom was remarried with another baby on the way, and I—” he broke off with a little shake of his head, and stared out into the trees. 

“I should have been there for him more. It all feels pointless now looking back, but I was so busy trying to live up to what I thought I was supposed to be that I just… ignored him most of the time. Worse, like a total asshole, I was mad at him for still managing to stay his dorky self, no matter how much our parents tried to train it out of him. And Instead of protecting him from the same pressures they’d put on me, I was… jealous. I love that little nerd, and I need him to know that. I have to fix this.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll help you get him back,” Jonathan said, patting his steed on the head. “Right, Argy?”

Argyle nodded enthusiastically.

A little too enthusiastically, and the only thing that kept Jonathan from tumbling off Argyle’s back was a firm grip on the creature's horns. 

“Sorry, little dude,” Argyle murmured sheepishly. “Just excited to help. Y’know, I’ve always wanted a brother.”

Jonathan’s tail began to wag in earnest, his mouth dropping open into an unmistakably pleased canine grin. “I’ll be your brother!”

Argyle roared in celebration, spinning himself and his newfound brother around in circles as they rushed ahead through the trees shouting, “You hear that?! I got a brother!”

Steve chuckled at the display, turning around to share his laughter with Robin only to find her some yards behind, jogging towards him. 

When she caught up to where he waited for her, Steve tried to apologize, feeling terrible for not realizing she wasn’t with them, but Robin took one look at him and spoke first, interrupting.

“That’s not fair!” She huffed, annoyed, glaring at the top of his head. “How did your hair go right back to normal?!”

Steve tossed his head around, shaking his hair out before running tentative fingers through it. It did feel much less voluminous already, but without a mirror he’d have to take her word for it that it was already back to its former glory. Robin, however, still looked like a poodle who’d accidentally electrocuted itself. 

“Superior hair care products?” He offered with a shrug.

She grumbled something like, “superior hair care products my ass,” and together they turned towards the direction of Argyle and Jonathan’s voices, still hooting and hollering in the distance.

“Hey, uh, by the way, I found… I found this,” Robin said, resting a hand on Steve’s arm, stopping him, just as he was about to suggest they hurry and catch up before the others got too far away.

“I thought you might be getting hungry.”

Steve looked down as she pulled something from her pocket, and found resting in her hand the plumpest, most delicious looking peach he’d ever seen.

She was absolutely right. Steve was starving, and by the time the sweet smell of the ripe fruit reached his nose, he was already salivating. He could have kissed her. It was like she’d read his mind.

“Thanks, you’re a lifesaver!”

His hunger was suddenly overwhelming, and Steve didn’t hesitate to take the peach from her palm and dive into it, barely chewing before swallowing his first bite. The juice that rolled over his tongue tasted a little funny, but he imagined that was to be expected. Of course fruit from the labyrinth might taste different from what he had at home, and honestly he was famished enough not to be picky about it. 

On his second bite, the strange flavor, almost metallic in nature, settled on his tongue again. Everything from his lips, down his throat, and all the way to his stomach felt warm and tingly, as though he’d taken an extra large swig of cheap vodka. Not entirely unpleasant, but it made his head swim. That, and the fact that his entire body was breaking out in a cold sweat, set off alarm bells in his brain. 

“What…” Steve spat out what was left in his mouth, but he already knew it was too late. “Robin, what have you done?” 

The world tipped on its axis, sending him stumbling into a nearby tree, the remains of the peach falling from his grip to roll away and lay forgotten on the forest floor. He sank to sit at the base of it, looking up into Robin’s tear filled eyes as she slowly backed away from him. 

“Damn you, Eddie!” She cried out, adding softly, “and damn me too,” before turning heel to run.

Steve took a deep breath, opening his mouth to call out to…

To… 

To who? 

He was traveling with others, he was almost sure. 

Maybe he should go find them.

Hmm.

Where was he anyway?

And why was he sitting on the ground?

Didn't he have somewhere he needed to be?

He tipped his head back to rest against the rough bark of a tree that seemed to be propping him up. Standing seemed like way too much work, and the trees sure were pretty here.

And if he did have companions, surely they’d notice he was missing and come back to find him.

The wind picked up as he mulled it over, and the swirling air felt wonderful as it dried the thin layer of sweat sticking to his skin. It also brought along with it a handful of bubbles, like those you might blow with soap and a small round wand in your backyard in summer; iridescent, shining, and magical, except these were as big as Steve’s fist, and seemed to hover with a purpose around his head. A head that grew heavier by the second as he slumped further and further down the base of the tree, till he was nearly laying down atop its roots. 

There was something familiar about them, beyond the fact that they were bubbles. Something niggling at the back of Steve’s mind, equal parts unnerved and intrigued by these perfect, clear spheres. 

As he gazed into them, hazy images appeared. 

Couples in formal dress, dancing in circles across a polished marble floor. 

A crystal chandelier swaying gently back and forth, some distant light glinting off the many faceted strands that hung from it. 

A stunning stranger, lurking in the dark. 

And finally, Steve saw himself, standing in the same swath of shadow wearing a beautiful white suit of intricate design. 

But that couldn’t be right. If he was here, how could he be there? Or… was he there and not really here? Or maybe he was just tired, and in need of a nap.

Yeah.

Steve stopped fighting, and finally let his eyes fall shut. 

Everything would make a lot more sense when he woke up.

Steve stood at the edge of a sprawling dance floor, the shining tips of his heeled boots resting on the invisible border separating the center of a grand ballroom, the area meant for dancing, from the round banquet tables surrounding it on every side.

Slowly he took in his surroundings, getting the strangest sense there was something he was missing—no. Something he’d been looking for. 

Something, or someone he needed to find.

Hanging high overhead were a dozen or more enormous chandeliers, dripping in crystals that caught the room’s light, reflecting and refracting it to throw glittering rainbow patterns all along the white stone walls. 

Countless couples, all donning elaborate masks of various shapes and sizes, textures and colors, spun round and round the space to the sweeping and romantic melodies played by an unseen band.

The women wore exquisite full ball gowns. Their voluminous silhouettes with billowing sleeves, fine details of lace, beaded bodices, and other delicately embroidered designs were incredibly eye-catching. 

The men, wearing their own finery, were a bit more reserved—

Save for one. 

Weaving his way through the pulsing sea of bodies, Steve moved towards a dark figure in the crowd. It was a man, his mask unlike any other, starkly black, and adorned with the likeness of a goblin, topped with long devil-like horns. Though he held the covering up in front of him concealing most of his face, the mass of dark curls and deep brown eyes that peered out from behind it spoke of a beauty that no doubt extended to the rest of the man’s form.

He was unmatched in dress, outfitted with a distinctive double-breasted coat that cinched at the waist, accentuating the man’s lithe figure, the length of it fanning out to the sides and behind, hanging practically to his ankles. It was satiny black, with swirling floral accents and creeping ivy done in a dazzling midnight blue. A cluster of roses in the same dark hue clung to one shoulder, cascading down his arm to settle at his wrist.

Underneath it all was a bare chest wrapped in nothing but a black lace waistcoat, see-through enough to allow even more of the pale flesh beneath it to peek out, riding just above a pair of skin tight pants which left very little to the imagination.

Steve saw it all in a flash before the many dancers between them turned, and his handsome stranger was swallowed up by the crowd.

Of all the things Eddie might have expected to come out of Steve’s subconscious—a high stakes basketball game, with himself as captain at the helm of the winning team, perhaps? Or whatever other pointless pursuits spoiled rich boys and stuck up jocks dreamt of.

A Masquerade ball certainly wasn’t high on the list. 

Who was he kidding, it wasn’t even on the list.

Perhaps it was time to admit to himself that maybe there was more to Steve than met the eye. 

Eddie entered the extravagantly decorated ballroom and immediately began stalking his way around the perimeter, sparing little more than a glance at the beveled floor to ceiling columns wrapped in shimmering gossamer fabric—or the fine linens, in layers of white, gold, and silver that adorned the tables, their centerpieces made up of glass bowls of varying size overflowing with fragrant blossoms, white jasmine and gardenia.

And he paid no mind to any of the figures performing their elegant dance. He only had eyes for one of this soiree’s attendees. 

Steve. 

He had to find him, and see if the spell really worked.

A task, it turned out, that took barely any effort at all. Seconds into Eddie’s search, the crowd parted in such a way that left a clear line of sight straight across the dance floor. 

And there Steve was, sparkling like a diamond in the center of it all, a flawless, precious stone whose mere presence made everything around it seem dull in comparison. Or maybe a pearl was the more accurate analogy, with the way his crisp white suit shone, standing out in a sea of muted color. 

Embossed with a thick mesmerizing pattern of trailing stems, leaves, and thorns, and laden with glittering beads sewn in, the jacket was expertly fitted and uniquely cut to perfectly frame an impressive swath of chest hair—just begging for someone to come along and run their fingers through it—wholly visible through the sheer white top he wore beneath.

His crown of hair, impressive as it’d been before, was now impossibly styled to defy gravity and reality itself, with its ornate swirls and swoops, decorated with flashes of silver and gold, sparkling jewels, strands of iridescent pearls, and a few delicate sprigs of baby’s-breath.

Eddie might be the king here but it was Steve who truly looked like royalty now. Someone deserving of the truest love and deepest devotion. A figure worth serving—worth falling to your knees for. 

And underneath it all—the magic, the attitude, the trappings of the Goblin King, Eddie was still just a man. 

Powerless to resist.

While Eddie was busy staring it seemed Steve had taken notice of him too, and began walking towards him. 

In a moment of panic, Eddie took advantage of a passing couple, using them for cover as he vanished from sight. He reappeared in a different corner of the room, leaving Steve wearing a puzzled expression, head swinging back and forth around the floor, searching. 

Had Eddie’s spell failed?

There was definitely something in the other boy’s gaze, in those seconds when they’d briefly locked eyes, some spark of recognition. 

Except… Steve didn’t seem in any distress. Surely he would be at suddenly finding himself in these unusual surroundings if his memory was intact.

As Eddie watched from his new position, Steve picked his way through the assembly, his eyes constantly scanning the crowd until again they locked eyes. Eddie's heart pounded in his chest as he watched Steve’s mouth spread into a sly grin. Steve took two steps forward, and for a second time Eddie magicked himself out of sight.

Only now, he moved closer instead of away, placing himself just behind the other boy’s broad back. 

It was now or never.

Still holding his mask up with one hand, Eddie reached out with the other, settling his palm on Steve’s lower back, and leaned in to speak softly in his ear. “Looking for someone, sweetheart?”

With a quiet gasp, Steve whirled to face him. 

On the outside Eddie made sure to put on a confident smile, but inside he was on his guard, waiting for Steve to pull away, to be scared, to be angry… something. But the boy in front of him only bit his full bottom lip, his cheeks turning the most alluring shade of pink.

Eddie had never wanted to taste something more than this boy’s mouth ever in his life. 

“Not anymore,” Steve replied, reaching up to wrap his hand around the stick Eddie held, pulling the mask away from his face and letting it fall to the floor. “I think he just found me.”

Feeling suddenly unmoored, and breathless, Eddie fought to keep his cocky persona in place and not squirm under the scrutiny as Steve openly admired his suddenly bare face.

“Do I… know you?” Steve asked, narrowing his eyes a little, but quickly shook his own head, not waiting for a response. “Sorry, that was a silly question. There's no way I could forget meeting such a beautiful creature.” 

Everything from the base of Eddie’s neck to the tips of his ears went hot. In an effort to hide the sudden blush that was sure to be wreaking havoc on his paler-than-pale complexion, he took one of Steve's hands, raised it to his lips, and kissed the back of it. 

“Eddie,” he introduced himself, looking straight into Steve's captivating hazel eyes with his mouth still inches from his skin. He had to do something to regain a little footing in the wake of Steve’s charm.

“Steve,” the other boy replied with a tilt of his head, when Eddie finally let him go. “Can I confess something to you, Eddie?”

Eddie studied his face for a long beat, looking for any sign that this was all an act, a ruse to throw him off guard, but Steve really did seem to have no idea who he was.  

He nodded.

Steve stepped into him, sliding his hands up and over Eddie’s shoulders while he leaned in close enough to press their bodies together, their cheeks brushing as he whispered into Eddie’s ear. “It’s my first time. I think it might be best if you lead so I don’t embarrass myself.”

Eddie’s breath hitched, and he found himself clinging to Steve’s lapel to steady himself. “W-what was that?”

Steve let out a low, breathy chuckle. “Dancing, Eddie. It’s my first ball, of course.”

Oh and if Eddie didn’t already want to eat him alive.

“Of course,” he repeated back, squeezing where he gripped Steve’s hips for a moment before backstepping, forcing Steves hands to slide back down over the length of his arms so he could take hold of them again, leading the other boy in a turn away, only to snap him right back in so they danced chest to chest. 

Steve’s smile was wide when they came crashing back together, his eyes sparkling with it, and he tossed his head back with delighted laughter.

It was the second time in as many minutes that Eddie saw and heard what Steve was like when he was happy, when he was enjoying himself and not running for his life, or searching for his brother. 

It wasn’t something Eddie’d gotten to see very much in his spying, or since. But he supposed that was his own fault… wasn’t it.

Right.

As they danced Eddie did his best to ignore the uncomfortable feelings, the guilt and shame threatening to bubble up to the surface and ruin everything, and remember what the goal was here. But Steve really was something else, coy one moment, and pressing himself into Eddie the next with a confident smirk. 

It was all too easy for Eddie to let himself get lost in it, to forget who he was supposed to be, who Steve was supposed to be, and enjoy it—just for a little while.

“So, why me?” Steve asked as the music slowed, and the pace of their dance along with it.

For a split second Eddie panicked, thinking of only one reason for the question, but Steve quickly went on.

“I mean, to look at you I wouldn’t exactly think I was your type. And let’s be honest, you could have your pick of anyone here.”

They definitely made an unusual pair on the surface. Even discounting their greatest difference, namely that Steve was a normal human boy, and Eddie was… whatever he was. They were all contrasts. Dark and light, like the sun and the moon herself.

But what was one without the other?

With a little shake of his head, Eddie tugged Steve in close by his hips. Then, with a supportive hand, guided him back into a low dip, leaning over his stretched body. The urge to lick his stomach through the thin fabric was almost overwhelming. “Have you seen yourself, sweetheart? You are quite literally the belle of the ball.”

Eddie brought him back up carefully, until they were practically nose to nose.

“I bet you say that to all the boys,” Steve said, breathy and a little demure, but he also tipped his head in acknowledgement. 

He knew exactly how good he looked.

Eddie was in so much trouble.

“Tell me something about you. Something no one else knows.”

It was dangerous territory, unless Eddie was willing to make up stories, and it was probably well past time to give up the charade, but Eddie just couldn’t find the will to stop.

Still, he chose his reply carefully.

“I know I look like a winter, but deep down, I'm an autumn.”

Steve rolled his eyes, playfully swatting him on the shoulder. “You know what I mean, something real.”

Real. 

It was such a foreign concept to Eddie at this point, and something he only allowed himself to be when he was alone with Chrissy, or just, alone period.

“I… I had an uncle—Wayne,” Eddie began hesitantly. “I, uh, lost touch with him some time ago.”

“You miss him.”

It wasn’t a question, but Eddie nodded anyway. “He and my dad didn’t get along. Couldn’t blame him, my old man was a piece of work. Made it hard for Wayne to see me when I was a kid, but whenever he did manage to steal me away he made sure I knew I was loved. I don’t even know if he’s still alive.” 

Eddie didn’t realize he’d started welling up until the first hot tear escaped from the corner of his eye. Before he could reach up to wipe it away Steve was already there with a gentle stroke of his thumb.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you sad,” Steve said quietly.

“Don’t be. It’s—I don’t let myself think about the past very often, but it’s kinda nice to talk about him, even if it hurts.”

“Okay—” Steve cleared his throat, as if seeing Eddie upset had made his own voice thick with it too, before speaking again. “How about… sunset or sunrise?”

“Are we playing twenty questions now?” Eddie asked, casting him a crooked grin.

“Maybe not the full twenty. I wouldn't want to bore you.”

“Not possible,” Eddie countered without hesitation. After everything he’d seen the other boy accomplish and overcome, he knew nothing, not even a mundane conversation with Steve could ever be boring. 

“Again with the flattery,” Steve tsked. “What’s your answer?”

“Sunset,” Eddie said finally, after making a show out of thinking about it as they made another turn around the room. “Sunrise almost always means something has gone horribly wrong and I've stayed up far too late. What about you?”

“Personally I think it depends on what sort of activities have kept me awake so long past my bedtime. Watching the sunrise in a lover’s arms, for instance. It sounds… romantic, don’t you think?”

Eddie made a noise low in his throat, deep and rumbling. He could picture it all with ease. Steve in his bed, the wide open windows of his bedchamber giving them a perfect view of the sun’s first light as they lay tangled together, sweat still drying on their skin. 

“Is it too late to change my answer?”

Steve laughed brightly, a knowing smile playing on his lips.

They danced in comfortable quiet for a while, eyes fixed on each other as they moved to the music as one, finding their rhythm together whenever one song ended and another began, until a particularly melancholy tune filtered through the air.

Their movements slowed to the point that they were simply swaying in place, holding one another. And though they were still surrounded by other couples, it felt as if they were the only two people in the room.

“What are you most afraid of?” Steve whispered into the space between them. 

Eddie could have gone easy on himself, gave a more standard answer like spiders, or snakes, something tangible, easy to understand—easy to dismiss with a laugh or a scoff. But it seemed he was under Steve's spell just as much as Steve was under his, and so, truth.

“Ending up alone forever.”

Steve’s eyes swam as he held Eddie’s gaze, the wetness there spilling over as he answered in kind. 

“Me too.”

They weren’t even dancing anymore. 

Eddie took Steve’s face into both of his hands, returning the favor of drying his cheeks. “Not heights?” He asked, hoping to soften the heavy and bring a smile back to Steve’s face. 

“How did you know?” Steve asked, and there it was, a small but growing upturn of lips. “But not my biggest fear. In fact, I’ve always thought that with the right person by my side, I could handle just about anything.”

Mirroring Eddie’s own stance, Steve reached up to cradle his face and surged forward.

The moment Steve’s lips met his, Eddie lost all sense of space and time. There was nothing but the softness of his mouth, and the sweet taste of him. The way their tongues danced together, as their bodies had been doing all night, like they already knew each other intimately.

They separated too soon, bumped by another pair of dancers in passing, and Steve looked as gone as Eddie felt. 

He grasped Steve’s hand and led the way through the crowd, eyes searching for a doorway, a hallway, a dark corner—anywhere they might be able to be alone.

Nothing. 

As they reached the end of the room Eddie waved his free hand at the wall. From one blink to the next, a pair of french doors appeared in the middle of the once solid surface. Without stopping or even slowing down, Eddie pushed them open, and he and Steve walked out onto a wide terrace under a midnight sky.

The only light came from the stars above, but even in pitch black Eddie’s lips would have had no trouble finding Steve’s again. Like muscle memory they came together in the shadows, kissing like it was a need greater than air.

Eddie groaned as Steve’s hands wound into his hair, fingernails scratching, gripping lightly at the root. His own hands made their way south, finding heaven in his palms as he at last allowed himself to touch the swell of Steve’s ass, caressing and kneading the supple flesh through too many clothes. 

With a desperate whine, and without breaking their kiss, Steve forced Eddie back until his body met wall, and he found himself sandwiched between hard stone and Steve’s firm body.

Steve's mouth wandered from Eddie’s lips to the side of his neck, sucking a bruise into the delicate skin of his throat before moving down his chest, to where bare skin was cut off by clothes. Still, Steve continued to slide down his body, hot puffs of breath  making Eddie shiver even through fabric as Steve slowly sank to his knees.

In his current state, Eddie wasn’t exactly sure if he could die or not, but if he could he was pretty sure the sight before him would have sent him into an early grave. But goddamn, at least he’d go happy. 

Steve rested his hands on Eddie’s thighs, gripping tight as he leaned in to nuzzle his cheek over Eddie’s groin, where he was already almost painfully hard, had been halfway there since they started kissing. 

He wasn’t sure he’d ever been looked at or held like an object of desire before, and he hadn’t been touched at all in… well, decades. Even before he came to be in the Labyrinth, as a queer boy in the middle of nowhere in the 80’s, he wasn't exactly drowning in dick.

Steve mouthed at his length through the cloth, tilting his eyes up as he reached for Eddie’s waistband, as if asking for permission.   

And sure that’s why he dragged Steve out here, but that was in a moment of weakness. He… he didn’t think. 

Or maybe he just hadn’t dared to hope. 

But it wasn’t right, not like this, not when Steve was being deceived in such a complete way.

He had to stop this now before it went too far. 

“Wait—” Eddie said, the word choked off as he fought back a moan.

But Steve didn’t seem to hear, too lost to Eddie’s body and his own desire.

“Steve, stop—” Eddie managed to force his voice to sound strong and steady. Steve froze, looking up with confused eyes as Eddie bent down and helped him to his feet. “You don’t want to do this, trust me. You wouldn’t want me… if you knew.”

Steve was only more confused, the look in his eyes quickly bleeding into concern. He reached up, tucking a stray curl behind Eddie’s ear. “If I knew what, baby?”

Baby.

Eddie shivered, his grip on Steve’s arms tightening. How had he ever harbored such awful thoughts about him? The sweet boy he’d met tonight and, let’s face it, the dedicated brother he’d seen all along but chose to ignore, willing to do anything, and risk it all to get Dustin back. It didn’t matter that Steve wished his little brother away, what mattered was that he's sorry, that he knew he made a mistake and wanted to make it right.

“What I’ve done. What I am,” Eddie answered, leaning in, resting his forehead gently against Steve’s as he whispered the admission.

“What are you?” Steve asked, just as softly.

“A fool.”

Eddie knew now what he had to do. 

With one final feather-soft brush of lips, he let Steve go, stepping back to squeeze his eyes shut. He imagined this reality resting inside the protective bubble of one of his crystal balls, the walls holding it together clear as glass and just as breakable. In his mind he raised one closed fist in the air, and with a flick of his wrist spread his fingers wide.

The unseen explosion sent a shockwave through the air, shattering the ball into a million pieces, breaking the vision along with it.

Consequences be damned.

Chapter 7: Thirteen O'Clock

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[hikarry]

There should be more Good Omens x Supernatural crossovers

Fanart, fanfics, idc

Just

Castiel and Aziraphale's relationship would be fucking bomb! Hell, even Sam and Aziraphale's! They could be fucking nerds together

And don't get me stared on Crowley and Dean's dynamic! I just know they would absolutely annoy the fuck out of each other but become fast friends that just, ya know, thrive over fucking roasting each other but they would geek out over the other's car and music together. Just 🤌🏻 Crowley taking the shit out of Dean for him not only being American, but from bloody Texas of all places and Dean making a fake atupid British accent to annoy the shit out of Crowley because

Dean: "Look at me. Im a stupid demon that of all places in the world chose to become a fucking honorary Brit. How I love myself my stupid little tea at noon and pretend like I'm better than everybody else"

Crowley; "Listen here, you bloody Yankee, first off, tea is not my thing. Good whiskey, me. And I'm not bloody British! I'm a demon!"

Dean: "You sure act like one, posh bastard"

Crowley; "Posh? It's called having bloody manners! You fucking Americans must have lost them when you killed all the bloody natives and then came up with a stupid arse of a holiday to pretend you are the good guys"

Dean: "Says the Brit. Just the guys that enslaved half of the world and killed the other half."

Crowley: "I am not fucking British!"

Aziraphale: "He's right, Dean, dear. Technically we are not British. We don't have any nationality. We can speak every language and are nationless. Besides, we weren't involved with Britain's colonization. Actually, I believe Crowley spent most of his time in Iceland back in that century."

Crowley: "Oh yeah. We can speak every language but French, eh?"

Aziraphale: "We don't talk about that."

Castiel: "What's the problem with French?"

Crowley: "The problem is Aziraphale is absolute shit at it. It almost got him discorporated back in the French Revolution. Heavens, he can barely order a crepe when we go to Paris."

Castiel: "Why? It's in our nature to speak every language"

Aziraphale: "Oh for the love of all that's holy....I just decided to learn it the hard way, yes? Thought it might be fun."

Crowley: "Yeah. Just like the magic lessons you took. Which you are also shit at, by the way."

Sam: "Can't you like, do real magic?"

Crowley: "Precisely. But angel over here decided human magic was fun."

Aziraphale: "And I am correct! It's not my fault you are a cinic!"

Crowley: "You mean realistic. Every time I've seen you try to perform magic it's an absolute disaster. Embarrassing even."

Aziraphale: "Ah yes? What about my photo trick back in the 40s? Saved us, did it not?"

Crowley: "You did good there, yes. But, fucking Heavens angel-"

Dean: "Okay whatever. Let the fucking Brits have their little fight. We have work to do. Sammy, did you manage to locate the demon?"

Sam: "Actually, Aziraphale did."

Aziraphale: "It was quite easy, really. Crowley and I have dealt with them before"

Crowley: "You mean I saved your arse from them before"

Dean: "Oh for fucks sake, just let's go. Sammy, Cas, cmon."

Aziraphale: "Are you sure you don't want us to go? We could help."

Dean: "No. You both stay. Make up and makeout or whatever it is you do in your free time. We don't need you in the way"

Crowley: "Aziraphale, let's go. We gonna try and find some decent restaurant in this bloody city. Let them screw themselves. They will come begging for help before you know it"

Dean: "We've been dealing with demons for years, you pretentious fuck. We dunnot need your fucking help."

Crowley: "We've been alive for all the existence of humanity and have saved the world twice now."

Dean: "Big thing. We do that every other week. Open your mouth when you fight fucking God and then we will talk."

Sam: "Okay, okay, enough. You two go and do whatever it is that you want to do. We will reach out if we need help."

Aziraphale: "Jolly good. Come on, my dear. I've seen an amazing sushi restaurant down the street that looks decent enough."

[absolutepokemontrash]

Could i request the brothers (or some of your choice) meeting Grim? Like, the MC came back from twisted wonderland and brought him with them because they've been through so much togheter they're now inseparable?

Okay. Let’s do this.

Grim and the Brothers! [And a Tiny Crossover ;)]

Lucifer

MC, he said no cats. Yes, he’s happy that they’re back from their weird-Disney boarding school, but no cats. Especially not loud, whiny, bratty little-

Grim now sleeps on Lucifer’s lap. It took literally five minutes after Lucifer had his no-cat lecture.

Anyway, as fond as Lucifer is for the little cat, he isn’t afraid to string Grim up next to Mammon for any tuna theft, accidental fires, or general shennaniganery.

Lucifer’s exhaustion levels go up about 30% after he realizes he now needs to budget for all the tuna and toys the spoiled little cat needs.

Lucifer’s new Lock Screen on his DDD is a picture of MC and Grim napping on the couch.

MC’s new Lock Screen is a picture of Grim and Lucifer napping in Lucifer’s office chair.

One day while working in his office with Grim on his lap, Diavolo burst in being followed by someone in a strange looking crow mask. Diavolo quickly explained that the headmaster of Night Raven Academy wanted to drop in for a quick belated Parent-Teacher interview, and Lucifer was the closest thing MC had to a dad, so…

Lucifer then had to sit through about fifteen minutes of this… principal, explaining that he was oh-so generous, and such a great educator, and that he took such good care of MC during the year… Luci let him ramble, a fanged smile slowly crawling across his face until he cleared his throat and said “Ah, yes, you’re the one who MC said made them live in a dilapidated house, hm? Let’s talk about that. :)”

Crowley suddenly had to run, but Lucifer was very insistent that he stay and chat a while ^.^

Mammon

“Awwww! A kitty-“ “GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS AWAY FROM THE GREAT GRIM!” “OI! WHO DO YA THINK YOU ARE TALKIN’ TO THE GREAT MAMMON LIKE THAT-“

So many ore-samas going around… MC should get earbuds.

Once everything calms down, Grim has the sudden realization that Mammon reminds him an awful lot of two of his… lacking in braincell friends. So eventually, the two of them come to a standstill.

Mammon refuses to spell Grim’s name correctly, which pisses off the cat. But it doesn’t matter, Grim is Mammon’s little Grimm-Maneki-Neko, a lucky little money cat!

They both get into heaps and heaps of trouble, no matter how close the two of them end up getting, they both try and throw hands- or, paws with each other at random intervals.

Okay, so, one of MC’s friends from school decided to drop in, they were a real well put-together lookin’ nerd type with white hair and glasses. Mammon swore this kid’s eyes lit up like a Christmas tree when MC introduced Mammon to him. All of a sudden this kid was all compliments and charm, and oh would you look at that Mammon is signing a contract-

NOT ON MC’S WATCH YOU BONELESS SLIPPERY LITTLE BASTARD-

Leviathan

MC has a magical girl companion! Perfect! The two of them can go off and save the Devildom from any-

Okay nevermind this cat is a temperamental little shit.

When Levi went to welcome MC back from Twisted Wonderland, the Avatar of Envy was just buzzing with excitement, he had so much anime for the two of them to catch up on! It was going to be great!

And then this little bastard came along and ruined it. And apparently the little shit eats evil magic rocks too. Yippee.

Even though Grim is an adorable fire-kitty, Levi still worries about him somehow trying to eat Henry 2.0, so while MC visits Levi to watch anime, Grim is firmly banned from Levi’s room.

Yeah, and once these two friends of MC’s from school visited. It was some kid with blue fire hair and a tiny robot child who showed up to play video games with MC, and Levi decided to log on to join them.

…Idia and Levi recognized each other’s voices…

Apparently Discord allows friends through different dimensions. The fire Gamer and water Gamer get to meet in (*bleh*) person. It was… kinda awkward, but MC and Ortho were happy that their two shut in Otakus were friends.

Satan

C A T

Satan loves petting cats. Grim loves scritches. Satan loves giving cats treats. Grim is an insatiable little glutton who will never be satisfied. Satan loves Grim. Grim loves his shiny new servant. This is a mutually beneficial relationship.

At this rate, MC is going to lose their cat to Satan.

Out of all the brothers, Satan and Beel are the only ones who will really entertain Grim’s “I will be the greatest magic user of all time” speeches.

Grim definitely puts on a few pounds from all the treats.

So um… some really loud green haired kid dropped by to visit MC and Grim, and interrupted Satan’s reading time with all the yelling. It took all of the Avatar of Wrath’s self control to not whip the book at this sixteen year old’s head.

Also Grim was vibing on Satan’s lap and he didn’t want to disturb the little guy.

Asmodeus

Awwwww, what a sweet little kitty! Grim and MC are just soooooo cute! This is going on Devilgram!

Asmo takes approximately a thousand pictures, and Grim is suddenly the most adorable cat in the Devildom. At first Grim revels in the spotlight, then decides he doesn’t want to deal with the constant hair ribbons and nail trimmings…

Asmo weeps for his Devilgram fodder has left him…

Other than desperately trying to snap cute photos for the ol’ gram, Asmo really doesn’t see what MC sees in the cat. Like, out of all the cute things to get attached to, couldn’t MC have picked something less… annoying?

Also Asmo is not a fan of all the cat hair. So of course Grim makes sure to shed all over Asmo’s things.

Two of MC’s friends dropped by to visit once, and one of them took a single look at Asmo and started FAWNING over him. So many French compliments, so little time… Asmo might have to keep this one, but MC advised against it. (Poor Rook…)

The other boy on the other hand, Asmo found his new apprentice. Cater Diamond’s follower count skyrocketed after Asmo fine-tuned some angles for some selfies.

Beelzebub

Okay if this cat eats any more of Beel’s stuff, Beel is not responsible for what happens next. He’s sorry, but no.

Fret not dear human, one glare from Beel seemed to scare Grim shitless, so there won’t be any more traceable food theft from this kitty.

Other than the rocky start, Beel kind of likes Grim, he’s glad MC had a friend to keep them company while studying at a school in a different dimension.

Beel is also one of the two brothers to actually listen to Grim’s rants about how cool and powerful he is. Not that Beel’s actually listening too hard, he’s pretty focused on whatever food he’s eating.

This one friend of MC’s came over to visit once, and he made hands down one of the best desserts Beel has ever tasted. Sure, Barbatos’ were technically better, but these strawberry tarts were still amazing! Beel had found his pet personal chef! Finally! This glasses kid with green hair! Yay!

…a very angry, tiny redhead joined MC in convincing Beel that Trey needed to go home.

Belphegor

Grim is a little loud for Belphie’s tastes, but here’s the thing, Grim is a warm little kitty and is the size of a stuffed animal…

Nap buddy :D

Sure, Belphie has a few angry claw marks on his arms, but those were all worth it, imagine snuggling with your own warm little stuffed animal.

But in terms of the waking world, Belphie actually quite likes messing with Grim. He likes to get the cat all riled up and angry right before Lucifer is set to come home. The Avatar of Sloth kills two birds with one stone, he annoys Grim, and Grim annoys Lucifer with angry shenanigans in turn. Perfectly balanced, as all thing should be.

So… Belphie wasn’t the biggest fan of all the visitors MC was getting. One of them wouldn’t stop waving a shiny gold contract in his face, two of them were as stupid as Mammon, and this most recent one… oooo… this most recent one nearly caused Belphie to commit some honest to Jesus violence.

This random lion eared catboy just showed up, and passed out in MC’s bed and had the fucking nerve to snuggle them. Nuh uh. That’s Belphie’s living body pillow, not THIS RANDO’S.

Leona Kingscholar made an enemy that day, and he doesn’t even know it.

Also for some reason all of the food in the house went missing that day, and Beel was definitely not the culprit this time.

[oceanlue]

Yuurivoice boys: their S/O making him buy a fake product or non-exist product as prank.

🎊Pranking your man🎉

💗Alphonse🧁🍭

You had a paid week off from your job and lately you've been bored in the middle of the week you think that having a week off from your job would give your mind to rest but you were just bored

So you decide to do the one thing you love to do pranking Your Man

So you decide to think of ways and you thought of making a product that is not even real or even in the world at all

So it took some thinking and you decided that you were going to make him a fake new cologne

All you did was grab some water some air freshener and some Febreze and mixed it together all in all it didn't smell bad

So when he got home he kissed your cheek and you told him about the new product that came in this week's new magazine

He tested it out and he loved it

Until he got the whiff of Febreze and air freshener and then he asked what the f*** was this

So you told him it was just a fake drink that you did on him

"Now come on boo why you got to do me like Dat, but it does smell pretty great.. you know maybe if we call some companies we could actually make a selling for this but for the greater good let's just not tell anybody"

He still loves you

🧡Seth🏕🍂

You decided to make a prank on him

And it was about a new comfy seat for a bike but it was actually just a pillow sound onto an old seat and stuffed with lots of fluff

He told him about it and he was ecstatic to try it out

He attached the new seat to his bike and felt it in his hand a bit and it looked pretty great

And then decided to sit on it and when he did the stuffing popped out

It went like *poof*

He was confused and saw that you were laughing and realized it was a prank he actually thought that it was actually a seat from a new bike magazine that you saw but it wasn't

" okay sugar I'll give it to you you got me good and I should have known it was coming I know you like to play your pranks you're lucky I love you sugar"

He took you for a ride and took you to a park and then he pushed you into the lake as Revenge you can't get mad at that

💚Finn🌻🪴

You decided to prank him with a new bag of tea but it was actually the same bag of tea

When he got home from the flower shop he told him that you were out shopping and found out this new type of tea mix I was guaranteed to make you more calm and make your blood pressure pump it

He tried it out for a few days and didn't see that it was just the same tea that he always drank he just thought it tastes the same

And then you had to tell him it was just a prank that it was just the same tea that you always drink

He was a bit shocked embarrassed and read in the face that he fell for a prank

"Oh gosh darn it orchid actually thought it was something awesome you know that I can't stay mad at you but that prank was slightly efficient it made my work a little bit better but I prefer just sticking with the original"

He still loves you and as a prank to you he mustered up the courage to put hot sauce in your sandwich

❤Auron☕🖋

It was hard to prank your boss especially since he's your partner and boyfriend

So you did a lot of hard thinking of a prank

And finally you came up with an idea you are a bit of an Arts nerd so you decide to make the prank and started crafting

And finally you were done it looks like a million dollars but it was just an art watch

That's right you made him a watch but this watch doesn't work it just stays on 12:00 and will always stay on that it weighs feels and looks like a million dollars

So the next day when you were at work you gave your boss The Watch face to say he was surprised but said thank you anyway and went on with this day

At the end of the night you crashed at his place and while you were cooking some food for both of you he finally came down and talked to you about the watch how the watch never worked and it's only staying on 12th and he can't really find out where the crown was to change the time

And then you finally told him that it was just a prank and it's not a real watch

If you looked very closely you can see the pink on his cheeks and as you finished food and place it on the plates he grabbed her hips and whispered in your ear

"you know rock... I don't like being played a fool, all day I tried to fix this watch But realize it was a prank from you... it's great design I must say and you have great talent but I do not like being played like a fool, so how about we skipped dinner and go right to dessert~~"

You guys did eat your food..... eventually

His little secret is that he kept the watch in a safe apartment where you don't know where it is

---------

Hope u like it

💙💙💙

Peace out

[magnuficent76]

All of M3ph1st0's prosthetics - A comprehensive summary.

Mephisto is disabled in multiple ways. It is also a huge nerd and a big transhumanism fan who happens to know about a lot of robotics. That all being said, they have augmented themselves in many ways. Here's all of them, going from the top [Content warning for discussion of organs, surgery and like. Slight body horror that doesn't make sense. Don't worry about it !]

Main functionality ones:

Arm and Legs – Self explanatory. They help him get to places and work on things, also the oldest ones out of all his works given they've just been consistently upgraded to better suit all his needs. Each limb has a name (Leonard, Leslie (legs), and Hal (Arm/hand)), and they all care dearly for their creator because even though it might be programmed into them, Mephisto doesn't just treat them as disposable tools. They also have tiny android forms for when they're not assisting 310 and are free to walk around/opinionate on anything they want to. Mephisto treats them better than it does an Average Person.

Spinal support — Another one that helps quite a bit. Standing up for too long or sitting down the wrong ways causes Mephisto a lot of pain, so they made a device to help them with remembering to take care of themselves in that regard. Enter, Simon: The spinal support bot that connects directly to their back through a simple mechanism around the back. Simon is divided in two parts– A small battery-bot that charges up everything, that can detach itself from the main component any time it runs low on juice and slither around if it wants, and the inbuilt structure, which is what forces Mrphisto's back to stay put together and pulls it back in case it slouches too much (happens Often).

Non-organic Organs — After getting literally brought back to life by A Curse, the shitty old magic from a thousand years ago didn't account for how organ failure would happen in case a body that was cold and lifeless came back swinging from the dead, and as such a lot of Mephisto's organs function weirdly/stop at random times. These were a necessity it didn't expect at first, but had to quickly figure out. They're mostly made of flexible synthetic material the body wouldn't reject, and took several dozens of attempts on other people to perfect before they could be inserted into its own body. Essentially just keep everything in function while also giving him some benefits he built into them, such as:

Being able to digest non-edible things through brand new stomach upgrade that now lines his insides with Bigger and Better acid that is only found in skags. And Mephisto now. No more tummy aches due to tummy now being made out of Actual Steel.

Heart now has extra pumps to help with weakness and fatigue without overpowering any functions. Also sounds a little weird whenever you press your head to its chest due to there being a Small Sized Engine in there

Awesome brain implant that doesn't allow for biological death to happen anymore through constant manipulation of grey mass and stimulation of neurons. and that has no ethical concerns attached to it. Don't worry about it too hard !

Full intestinal system update where most of it is replaced by a series of tubes that can continue functioning as normal with filtering and breaking down masses. And that body only complains Sometimes about.

Lung inserts that can distribute miniscule electricity pulses throughout the whole chest in order to keep them breathing and healthy. It was a doozy to install this one but hey, now breathing is finally automatic as it should be.

...And some others that aren't nearly as interesting, but that help nonetheless. How was Mephisto able to perform surgery on itself? The short answer is it didn't, its limbs did with help from a supercomputer on the feiling. Are its limbs qualified to do surgery? Who was the supercomputer? How many surgeries did it take to insert everything? Is there a lot of visible scarring for it? All great questions that you will never know the answer to because Mephisto will throw things at you if you ask them.

Lesser functionality ones.

Metallic throat insert — This one was mainly from paranoia of being choked or being bitten directly on the throat, but it doubles as many things. Not only does it protect Mephisto from attacks to the larynx and windpipe specifically, it's also got an in-built AAC device for communication even when the old vocal chords can't seem to muster anything up. Great for pissing off ventriloquists also.

Better Teeth that Don't Rot and Break due to Being Made Out Of Metal (Or just Upgraded Dentures / Jaw) — Self explanatory, I feel. Forgot to brush their teeth a lot during depressive periods and ran into many issues regarding that, and so decided the only way to get that fix was to get Better, Cooler teeth over those (once they got fixed up) that are retractable and can be made Sharper at a given brain command. Used to bite its tongue a lot due to this and it bled like a motherfucker, which Led to:

Tongue That Doesn't Hurt anymore — Again, self explanatory. Again, took a while to get used to, but ended up solving so many problems it didn't matter anymore. This one is more just a cover than a full-on replacement because that would hurt way too much and there was no guarantee it'd work for good without the original muscles. It did, but it was one of the scarier things Mephisto did to itself.

Now you might be thinking, "Magnus, that's an awful lot of things. How'd Mephisto get funding to do all that stuff? Or find material? Or even just do them in general, given they seem so far out of the realm of possibility?", and these are all pretty good questions, how did you know to ask them etc. But Let me try and answer them as much as possible without too many spoilers:

Mephisto works for anyone who gives it money. Sometimes its corporations (Whom they immediately steal info and material from also), sometimes it's individual people looking to buy things off their shop, sometimes its evil villains who need all sorts of machinery for their plans. He's not particularly picky with the source, so long as its consistent and upfront.

Refer to bullet point one. It is Stealing most of the time, but when it isn't, material is coming from either their own scavenging trips or from teams they specifically pay to find material and bring it to them.

Borderlands isn't real and the absurdity is part of what makes it one of my favorite things, but also, again. Supercomputer did it for them. It's probably fine !

[hauntingjasper]

What would it be like if Gumball and Marshall were swapped?

Like, vampire Gumball and candy Marshall

(love your art 💗💗💗)

Omgomgomg I've been thinking about that swapping concept and I gotta doodle it someday because I have some ideas,, ,

What I imagined if Marshall Lee and Gumball swapped species: Marshall Lee would still be a candy prince, and Gumball would be the vampire king. Royal boys wow

I think Candy Prince Marshall Lee would be pretty calmer and less chaotic than his Vampire-Demon self, kinda like Human Marshall Lee from the canon spinoff but fancier. Not being raised in hell sure does wonders to a person.

But even though he's not a troublemaker, people would be quick to assume he's doing sketchy stuff behind closed doors... And they're right but that's not the point. He'd have this unusual aura around him, which causes people to have mixed feelings about him.

I like to think he'd still have a vampire-like appearance, always dressing in black, shaping his ears and teeth to look more pointed and sharp… His kingdom would look different too. I'm thinking that he'd have something like living candy statues of Gargoyles perched over the walls of his kingdom instead of Gumball Guardians. People might get freaked out because at first glance they wouldn't know that the statues can move and then suddenly there's Gargoyles flying around their houses at night, and now they feel like they're being observed. I think Marshall would be the type to mess with stuff he shouldn't too, such as dark magic and whatnot. He's a little prince of darkness.

He's also made of marshmallow. Strawberry marshmallow.

Unlike Gumball, he “bleeds” when he gets hurt, like a strawberry jelly. You can't really tell if it's just his filling or if it's actually blood, because chances are that it's both mixed together. Sometimes the dark arts require fresh blood to be successful, and that's his way of solving it.

As for Vampire Gumball, I actually haven't put a lot of thought into him yet, so my interpretation is still a concept up to changes (⁠��⁠∀⁠・⁠)

When I think of him, I imagine a lonely and depressed king who fell from his glory after having his court and minion armies decimated. That kinda sounds like an embodiment of PG’s fears mmmmm

I think he would be less sweet than his usual self. He used to be a more authoritarian and rigid king, he doesn't tolerate reckless behavior, so sit your ass down and only seek for blood when you're actually hungry, not just because you can (he's looking at you, The Star /hj). He probably values discreet work when hunting more than outwardly imposing fear and power, for the sake of surviving longer. Some vampires don't take him as seriously as they should because of this lack of total freedom. This does not mean that he does not assert authority, however. He will smack you upside down the head if you disrespect him.

He would still have some of his original traits despite everything. He can't create life like PG can, but maybe he's still connected to it somehow. Maybe he spends more time studying humans than he kills them, paralleling PG being a nerd lol. Maybe he's kinda like the VK and likes to be around animals too, and has a fatherly streak in him.

He wasn't staked when the vampires were persecuted and no one has any idea where he is now.

Not sure how it would be if Candy Prince Marshall and Vampire King Gumball met. The vampire era would've automatically made them stand on opposite sides, with Marshall Lee looking for Gumball's footsteps and Gumball trying to stay under his radar and manage his bloodthirsty armies at the same time.

But let's say they meet when Gumball is already a fallen king and isn't as big of a threat. Marshall would try to become "allies" with him, keeping him around in case Marshall needs him and having some sort of symbiotic relationship with him, with the occasional borderline flirting on Marshall's part.

I guess Gumball wouldn't be too fond of Marshall's connection to magic and would be sketchy of his sweet-talk, at the same time he'd have a bit of a soft spot for him. “Sometimes I feel like I would have loved to have you in my court”, he might say to him.

Thank you for the compliment and the ask btw 🫶💖

[noodyl-blasstal]

Blupjeans Week: Bet (day 2)

It's @blupjeansweek day 2. This follows on from yesterday's prompt. You can also read on Ao3

-

"It's going to be fine."

"Easy for you to say, you just casually revolutionised thermodynamics, you're gonna walk your viva." Barry could hear Lup rolling her eyes at that one, though he stayed resolutely focused on the raggedy copy of his thesis which was, at this point, 70% sticky notes. Could he read what any of them said because of how much they overlapped? Shut up.

"Natch, evocation is never going to be the same thanks to cha'girl's research, but that doesn't meant you're going to fail, Barold."

"No, they're just going to MPhil me out."

Lup sighed heavily. "Oh no, you worked hard and gained mastery in a subject, how terrible, what an embarrassment."

Barry did look up then, didn't she get it? He’d thought she’d get it. It was an embarrassment! She’d watched him put so much into this, the stupid well thumbed, badly bound paper stack represented four years of late nights, early mornings, cancelled plans, 3am anxiety… he thought she understood. She’d lived it with him, they were working for the key to the next level, if they gave him the wrong one what was even the point? "You think…?"

"I'm being flippant because that's not going to happen. Once again, I've read your work my guy, it's good, in fact, it’s great. In fact, right now, you’re arguing with established fact.” Barry grimaced as Lup spoke, but she ploughed on. “... you've already published three chapters of this thing in peer reviewed journals. 6/6 esteemed peer reviewers agree!"

"But they publish bad science all the tim…"

Lup cut him off. "Barry stop. You know you’ve done good science because a) I would have told you if you hadn’t, and b) peer reviewers might be lazy but you’re not. You know your submissions were solid, just look at the citations.”

“But…” She was right. But Barry still struggled, sure she hadn’t said anything incorrect, he knew he’d done solid work, but he also just knew that he’d fucked this up.

“...But what? But maybe they're idiots who can't recognise genius? They're gonna recognise it, Barry. It's impossible not to recognise how brilliant you are. That thesis is just you yelling “I’m Barry Bluejeans and I know what the fuck I’m talking about, pay me money about it.” Plus, publish a few more chapters and you can do PhD by publication without those losers to worry about anyway."

Barry didn’t even register the second part because Lup thought he was brilliant! Lup thought he was brilliant and she was telling him and he kept shutting her down instead of just being grateful about it. Maybe if he tried to accept the compliment. "Than…"

Lup started speaking at the same time. "In fact…" She paused to let him speak, but he shook his head and gestured to her, he could try being gracious another day. "... Okay, if you're sure." He nodded. "I think, Baraldo, that we should make a bet, you and I. I may as well profit from all this self doubt, so I bet you're gonna pass with no corrections."

Barry laughed bitterly. Whatever she was betting she'd be losing. "Lup, I'm going to fail."

Lup shoved his shoulder gently. "You're not and you know it. Be serious."

"Oh, like yours was serious?"

Lup's ears flicked back defensively. "Serious? Barry, c'mon. Obviously we all know cha’girl’s out here shaping the future of evocation, but you're doing magic within magic on all your spooktacular stuff. The chapter on spell wheels? I'd never considered it, and even if I had, I definitely would have taken at least 10 minutes longer than you to come up with something so elegant. You know what you're doing, I know what I'm doing, it's why we're such a great team."

They did make a great team. They’d met the first day of undergrad at orientation. Barry the lone mature student in a sea of babies, then Lup and Taako had appeared, and sure there was The Nerd Incident, but they cleared that pretty fast. They coincided in most classes, worked together in labs, and powered their way through a ridiculous amount of higher education together. There hadn’t been any question about it when the option of choosing housing came up, they lived together off campus and were joined by a rotating cast which had pretty much always featured Taako (well, until this year), but LupAndBarry, BarryAndLup? They were a constant, they worked. “We do work well together.” 

“You can say that again.” Lup glared at him as he opened his mouth to repeat it. “...And you know exactly how smart I am, right?” Lup asked. Barry could taste the trap-ness of this question, she was an angler fish and the question was a beautiful little light, he was going to answer it honestly and wholly and she was going to chomp him down with her big clever teeth.

“You’re incredible Lup, your research is amazing and you’re passionate and eloquent and so smart…” 

Lup’s teeth closed. “Then you know I know my shit well enough to know your shit’s good, so, what’s your bet?”

“I pass with major corrections?”

Lup raised an eyebrow. “Question, or an answer?”

“I pass with majors.”

“Fine. If you want to lose whatever you’re betting then be my guest, Bluejeans.”

“I don’t think I have anything you want.” Barry said, and he wasn’t sure, it was a ridiculous thought, but he could have sworn that Lup’s ears reddened at the tips. She coughed loudly, then almost shouted “Jeans.”

“What?”

Lup coughed again and spoke in a softer tone. “I get rights to your wardrobe. I know your jeans are comfier than mine.”

Barry hesitated. He’d already lost a good chunk of his shirts and sweaters to Lup. Not that he minded most of the time, he usually managed to steal his favourites back briefly on laundry day, but his jeans? He only had three pairs and they all served specific purposes in his life, he couldn't afford to sacrifice them, no matter how cute Lup would look in them. But, <;i>but</i>, there was no way he was actually going to pass without corrections, everyone at least got minors and Barry's supervisor definitely didn't think he'd even manage that. According to the available evidence, this seemed like a safe bet. "Deal!"

Lup grinned big and wide and dangerous . "GuyWhoJustLostHisJeansSaysWhat."

"What?" Barry asked.

Lup snickered. "Just asking what you wanted from me if your externals are somehow struck incapable of recognising brilliance?"

Oh... yeah, Barry had forgotten this part. Lup's brash overconfidence in his abilities had essentially signed her up to do whatever he wanted. He could stick her with dish duty for the next hundred years; make her actually use the dregs of her body wash before she moved onto the next one so the edge of the shower wasn't a terrifying pile of upside down barely balanced bottles; he could ask her to tell him whether there was an expiration date on their whole thing, whether the end of study meant different directions and fond memories, phone calls which dwindled as she remembered less and less… "You have to come home with me." He blurted out the thought before he could properly consider what he was asking. Was that too much? Oh it was probably too much. A trip home meant a road trip, motels, meeting his Mum. There was no way Marlena wouldn't pick up on exactly how he felt about Lup, not that she hadn’t already, but it was easier to lie on the phone. Plus, there was no way his Mum wouldn't love Lup too. How could anyone not? Then he’d only disappoint her when Lup moved on with her life and left him behind. Maybe he could back track, do the dishes thing instead…

"You have yourself a deal, Mr Bluejeans, may as well use that title one last time. Now, I have some outfits to plan, go eat the sandwich I made you, then I'll help with the last minute prep." Lup disappeared in the direction of Barry's room. 

Barry resigned himself to losing another few shirts while Lup investigated his wardrobe and obediently shuffled his way to the kitchen. It was definitely time to eat, he wasn't entirely sure when he last did… probably the last time Lup shoved food at him. He definitely had to thank her when this was over. 

-

"...And why did you decide on Necrostics?" Lup looked expectantly at Barry. 

"It was the most logical methodological approach as it incorporates acknowledgement of the agency held by constructs and the undead while also acknowledging the influence of social and summoning factors. I modified the approach to ensure it was appropriately controlling for the new spells I developed."

Lup clapped her hands delightedly. 

"It was that good an answer?" Barry asked.

"It's that good a wardrobe. I cannot wait to get my hands on it, Barold, you're gonna be living in your pants… although…" Lup narrowed her eyes. 

"Absolutely not, no!"

Lup shrugged. "You can't watch your stuff all the time, Barry. Cha'girl needs some new sleep shorts."

Barry felt his face flame at the thought of Lup sleeping in his clothes, Lup wanting to. "I'd better go now!" He said, too fast and too loud. "Gotta go get it over with."

Lup jumped up. "Cool, I'll grab my book and and few other bits and come with. There's some comfy chairs in the corridor with my name on them."

Oh. Lup was going to come with him. Lup was going to wait for him. "You don't have t…"

"I want to."

–

"Good luck Barold, you've got this." Lup hugged him firmly, he squeezed back. If he didn't let go he didn't have to go into the scary room. Can't defend your thesis if you’re in the middle of a hug, that’s just science. Lup pulled back slightly, then dipped her head to kiss him on the cheek.

Barry didn't have time to react before Lup pulled away and planted herself across the corridor chairs, head buried in her book.

"Are you ready, Mr Bluejeans?" A voice asked from the door behind him. All Barry could do was touch a hand to his cheek, turn, and nod. 

– 

"Congratulations again, Dr Bluejeans, this may be the most enjoyable viva I have ever taken part in." Said Dr Combish, opening the door for him. 

Barry was going to pass out. The adrenaline finally drained out of him, weeks, months of panic, gone. It was over. An outright pass? It was so rare, so ridiculously unlikely. He should be raring to celebrate, but mostly he just wanted to go home and sit very still in the dark. He stepped into the corridor, remembered to thank Dr Combish, and stared numbly at the door as it closed. What did he even do now? It was over. A whole chunk of his life was just… done. He had the keys to the next stage, had the fancy title, had everything he'd worked for and… and? 

"Hey Bear?" Lup nudged his arm gently. "How'd it go?" 

"I… I passed?" Said Barry. "Yeah. They. Well. I passed!" His voice broke momentarily, to say it was so surreal. "Lup! I passed!!!" He grabbed her into a hug. "I did it! We did it! Thank you, thank you thank you thank you!"

"Knew you could." Lup said thickly, hugging him back. They didn’t say anything for a while, just held on tight. “We… we should do something.” Said Lup, eventually. “Celebrate, you know.”

“We’ll celebrate together when you pass next week.” Barry didn’t even have to think about it. Whatever he could do, Lup could do better, there was no way she’d be correcting anything.

“Fine, but we’re getting pizza, from the good place.” Lup grabbed her backpack from the chairs.

Barry stared for a second. “You… you’re wearing my garden jeans. Lup!”

“And they look great on me. Told you I believed in you. Fair’s fair.” Lup winked, wiggled her butt, and grabbed his hand. “Now, let’s get you home, Baraldo. We need to ring Marlena and tell her, she’ll be having kittens.”

Barry couldn’t do anything but nod.

[arina-nov]

Korolevs. What is it?

Hello everybody! I haven't been here for a while, and that's because I'm actively working on my project!!

Korolevs — project (comics, short stories and small animations) about eight magical clones that try to pretend that they are actually an ordinary family. it turns out that it's terrible for them, but slowly getting used to the routine of life among people, they realize that a huge danger is hanging over them.

— Little bit about the setting 🌟

The small Russian city —" Podmoskovsk", 2014. This city is difficult to find on the map, and someone says that paranormal things are happening here. Clones, a strange girl with... gremlins? (We thought it was kittens). Mermaids in the sewers of the city and strange spirits. I'm Surely these are all fairy tales.

— And the characters?

Gabriel (Grisha) — one of the youngest clones. He is inquisitive, often speaks Italian and is extremely charming. You should take a look at his training sessions!

Kuromaku (Alexey) — The loser, nerd, and man who considers it his duty to look after all the other clones. The "voice of reason" among all his brothers. Maybe look at some of his notes about the city?

Dante (Daniel) is a quiet and wise man. He will offer you to drink tea together or admire nature. Otherwise, he is useless, but don't you think that "utility" is a social construct devoid of meaning? He thinks so too until the moment when it's time for lunch

Felix (Kirill) — the epitome of goodness and childish naivety. And his clothes can be distinguished by the sequins in them. If good should be with fists, then he is good with a bat. in fact, we are very vulnerable, although you can't say that.

Franz (Felix's Cat) —a big and red-haired cat. He is very affectionate and lazy.

Varu (Nikita) — pubertal ulcer. the most unpleasant person with megalomania and the idea of his exclusivity. He's always messing with everyone and scheming. constant fights and confusion in the house is made by him

Brolly (Alexander) — a shy young man. He is very quiet, easy-going and, to put it mildly, soft-spoken. We are very dependent on the opinions of others and their thoughts. Please be gentle with him

Romeo (Roman) — Chaotic, frivolous and loving is this man's middle name! he is very sweet and friendly, at the same time he is the personification of love. extremely strong love..

Spade (Fedor) — Quiet. A sullen man. he is extremely taciturn and apparently unsociable. in fact, he really wants to be alone and relax. many people consider him a terrible person. We hope this is not the case.

That's it! Stay tuned!

[boxdstars]

SILLY INTENT TIME

i wanna hear how you view/create/write/draw werewolves/what kind of abilities, etc, werewolves have for your universe (as a fellow werewolf nerd >:) )

SILLY TIME INDEED!!!

I'm rubbing my hands together and giggling OK-- I've got a lot to say about this topic because I take some pretty different turns especially regarding the movies portrayal (which i hate fyi).

In the books, they're larger wolves with fluffier tails and human eyes. I quite like this portrayal because the movie werewolves are so uncanny they look like they come straight out of analog horror. Which I'll be honest, can be a vibe but it's not what I'm going for per se.

I also think there should be some perks to it, rather than just it's all bad. For example, I imagine they've got better senses, hearing, sense of smell, all that jargon. I reckon they also have special accelerated healing properties, which not only ease the transition between human and wolf but help with even little things like sickness or bruises. Except for of course, their bite mark which never heals.

I imagine they aren't bothered by other magical creatures. So a centaur would be able to tell if someone was a werewolf and see them as an ally rather than mistrusting them (and rightfully so wizard kind sucks). Same even goes for the spider folk and even trolls. Werewolves can also sense other magical creatures, so it goes both ways. They all got to stick together, you know?

There's also some slight physiological changes. I give Mara pointy ears, but those are just a meta-design choice, her ears never change and she blends right in. Her canines are far sharper though. She also has some dog-adjacent behaviors too though these are mostly holdover from her wolf self.

One of my favorite lore bits from canon is the whole "if a werewolf in human form bites someone that person won't be a werewolf, they'll just have doglike behaviors and an affinity for raw meat." This is literally the funniest thing ever I literally love it it has to stay.

[roipecheur]

Here's how to fix Frank Punisher.

First, retcon whatever happened in Punisher 2022. Say it was all a dream and Frank passed the test or whatever by not giving into the Beast at the very end, thereby defeating it. Or the Beast was possessing him the whole time, so none of that was really him, and also Maria was not like really Maria or whatever. I don't care, it's bad, it completely undermines everything that makes Frank as a character, and it needs to go.

So. At the end of Punisher 2022, he's in some hell dimension called 'Weirdworld'. That's fine, that can stay. This is the only good content in the entire run besides Frank's obligatory homoerotic moments with Daredevil.

Frank should get forcibly adopted by wandering children and accidentally catapulted into Dad Mode™ between unimaginable bouts of violence. This is probably the only time that run got him right.

Now, to bring Frank back. He needs a new Microchip. This guy can have some connection to the original David Linus Microchip Lieberman who Frank murdered to death for betraying him back in the early aughts, or he can just be some rando who took on the hackerman name.

He appears to Frank in Weirdworld as some sort of spirit while the kids are sleeping. New Microchip has projected himself in there using magic. He offers to bring Frank out of Weirdworld, but in exchange, Frank has to grant him a favor. Frank tells him to go fuck himself with extra sauce. New Microchip offers to save the kids, too, and Frank is a sucker for kids. So he agrees.

(I'm picturing New Microchip kinda like that nerd guy from the animated Atlantis movie, but OG Microchip was also fat, so like Atlantis guy with a little extra pudge. Cute, though.)

Frank is back on Earth. The kids are free and get sent to someone, probably Natasha because Frank trusts her and she'd look at them and go "what the literal hell" and I think that would be funny. New Microchip has a very Frank-like backstory where his family got killed, and he wants Frank to kill their killers. Frank is opposed because His War Is Over and he doesn't like being forced to do things. But he has to go along because of the magic deal.

Punisher skull comes back. Frank mows the people New Microchip wants dead down in a very typical, Frank-like way. New Microchip also outfits him with a battle van and provides really good tech support. When it's done, Frank is automatically released and is no longer bound to New Microchip.

Naturally, Frank goes to kill him. He finds New Microchip sitting out back looking at the scenery of some sort with a loaded gun waiting nearby. Waiting for Frank. New Microchip's job is done, and he gave up everything to do it. He expects Frank to kill him.

Instead, Frank is like. Grudgingly impressed that this guy had the balls to take what's coming to him instead of trying to run. He also likes his new battle van and could get used to that sort of thing. So, he offers New Microchip a job.

Ok. Here's the crucial part. If this was a new run, Frank should be done with this round of gratuitous violence by issue 3-5, and he and New Microchip should be fucking before issue 10. It needs to be played exactly the same was as if New Microchip were a woman. He's patching Frank up or something, and then they start kissing, fade to black, next page shows them in bed together.

Marvel needs to really play up Frank being bisexual. Not gay. Bisexual. Frank loved his wife, and that's very important to his backstory. Also, gay and not bisexual Frank gives off this weird vibe like being gay helped make him the Punisher, and that would be a nightmare for the PR team and for me personally. But they need to make him SO queer. To the point where people see those stupid thin blue line Punisher skulls and go...isn't that the one who has a boyfriend now?

Angry right-wingers with guns will be burning their shirts and tearing the decals off their cars. Frank's fan base will return to where it belongs: with weird comic book freaks who think he's a funny little guy.

One other thing. There has to be one splash cover where Frank is bridal carrying New Microchip to safety. There should be an explosion behind them. The explosion should, inexplicably, be in the shape of a skull. Picture this. It's very romantic.