#mAKING AND BUILDING THINGS WITH THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE AS THE WAY TO LIVE A FULFILLED LIFE
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teaboot · 1 day ago
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TOP 10 PERSONAL FAVE MOVIES TO WATCH WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE ASS
I don't like movies that stress me out because life is already stressful but I DO love catharsis comedy found family friendship fantasy and violence so here are my top 10 movies and series to have a good time watching
Numbered for convenience but not in any particular order
John Wick 1 and 2: An ordinary man grieving the loss of his wife gets dragged back into his past as a shadowy, invisible world of international killers for hire is slowly revealed to be living among us. A love note to set design, lighting, and choreography. My favourite part is fixating on the symbolism. DO NOT WATCH 3. 4 is okay. DO NOT WATCH 3. There is a dog death in 1 that will make you cry so skip that part if you have to. DO NOT WATCH 3.
The lord of the Rings, all 3, extended edition best watched if you're on the couch with the flu and expect to fall asleep OR if it's your day off and it's raining outside OR if you have like 5 people lounging around in pajamas
Six Underground: Essentially an hour and a half long car commercial music video with found family and a fresher take on acommon plot. Ryan Reynolds essentially writes and directs a Michael Bay movie where 6 independant criminals gather together to overthrow a violent foreign dictatorship. You show up for a dumb heist and walk out ready to build a guillotine. TW for violence, car crashes, chemical warfare, and genocide. A very cathartic ending. Does unfortunately do the whole "vague, impoverished middle-eastern country" thing but the citizens are actually show as human beings which is a nice change of pace and oh wow that's depressing isn't it
The Princess Diaries 1 and 2: A sort-of-a-loser teenage girl, played by a 2001 Annie Hathaway, learns that her late father was a king of a foreign nation and must become a confident and responsible leader for his people. There is a scene in the rain where you will experience emotions. Best watched with snacks. 2 features an enemies-to-lovers type deal with Chris Pine.
Ella Enchanted: A shrek-style semi-musical fantasy romance in which a young woman is cursed at birth to do everything anyone tells her to do. Features several Queen songs and dance numbers sung by Annie Hathaway and that guy who plays the sad dog guy in Hannibal.
Stardust: A huge loser travels from 1800s England (?) to a magical world in order to fetch a fallen star for the insufferable love of his life before she marries a massive douchebag. The huge loser? Charlie Cox. The star? A living person. Also a whole bunch of princes are ALSO looking for them as a race for the throne while discreetly killing each other off. And also a bunch of witches want to eat her so they can be young and sexy. 11/10. I used to watch this 10 minutes at a time on a YouTube channel that posted it in chunks filmed on a digital camera in their living room
The Last Holiday: Queen Latifah, playing someone played by Queen Latifah, has been working an underappreciated minimum wage job for years, living a safe and conservative life trying to lose weight and save money. Then she finds out she has months to live, and decides to finally quit her job and blow it all on one massive luxury holiday vacation complete with five-star dining, making friends and finding love and confidence along the way. It's definitely corny but it makes me so happy thank you Queen Latifah
Zathura: It's the plot to the original Jumanji but in space instead of the rainforest. But listen to me: There's a twist reveal at the end that you need to pretend isn't there. It is vitally important when you get to that part- and you will know what part when it happens- that you pretend it didn't. Otherwise, a fresh and enjoyable adventure for any age!
Redacted cause I haven't seen it in a long time and it may be worse than I remember, gotta rewatch
Bullet Train. You go in expecting a ham-fisted find-the-mcguffin style action comedy and are blindsided by excellent narrative symmetry and genuinely likeable characters. Fresh takes on old themes and creative action sequences. My little brother said "It's good", and he's a man who once sincerely argued that Lord of the Rings could have been better. It's fun and punchy violence with just enough smart stuff to not let your brain get bored
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rothpie · 2 days ago
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❝FIDELITY❞ |part8
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MASTERLIST -`✮´- Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader x JJ Maybank
Summary: Kook!Reader’s world is upended by betrayal, and her only way forward might lie with the most unlikely person—JJ Maybank. But as they build a new life together, old flames and past mistakes refuse to stay buried.
Warnings: slut shaming(?)
previous - next
Could you really call yourself an adult now?
I mean, honestly, is there some magical age that makes you a certified grown-up?
If it’s all about age, then nope—you weren’t an adult. Maybe a “young adult” at best, but even then, the life you were living? Let’s just say it was… a bit different.
When everything started happening so quickly, keeping up felt impossible. And let’s face it, that was normal. If you managed to juggle everything with calm composure, you’d probably qualify as Wonder Woman. Life came with its ups and downs, but throw pregnancy symptoms into the mix, and things got extra tricky.
You liked to share what you wanted with others. Talking about your plans openly was just how you were. It wasn’t about bragging; you just enjoyed sharing your happiness. But every single time—without fail—whatever you talked about? It never happened.
That Venice trip you’d been set on for the summer? Canceled.
The dream university? Rejected. That car you were this close to buying? Nope, didn’t happen.
It was like clockwork. Every time.
And the thing was, you never learned. Not really. You’d repeat the same mistake again and again. Life’s law, right? Someday you’d figure it out… though that day clearly wasn’t anytime soon.
Pregnancy, though, wasn’t exactly something you could go shouting about to everyone. That was off the table. But moving?
If you weren’t pregnant, there’s no way you’d have kept quiet. You’d have made sure the entire island knew. And naturally, that would’ve meant it wouldn’t happen.
This time, though, you zipped it. The only person who knew was JJ—and, well, he didn’t really count. Or, okay, maybe he did. Of course, he was important, but not the kind of person to stand in your way. On the contrary, he had your back. He even offered to help you with the whole moving process.
Things happened so fast, you could hardly believe it.
Your dad came home from his work trip, you visited the mainland, met with a realtor friend of his, checked out potential homes—it was like someone had hit the fast-forward button.
You couldn’t decide on anything. You were even okay with a cute little apartment. The list of occupants was simple: you and your daughter. You didn’t need much more.
Your mom, however, had her opinions. She didn’t want a mansion either, but she was firm about the house having enough rooms. One for you, one for your daughter, and a guest room—because naturally, grandma duties. And a yard, because she wanted to watch her grandchild play outside.
So apartments were out. Houses it was. After seeing what felt like a million empty ones, you were ready to scream.
But finally, you found it. The perfect house. The yard alone sold it. You could already picture the memories you’d make there with your daughter. Maybe a swing or a hammock… some comfy furniture on the porch.
You never imagined you’d get so close to your dream so quickly.
It had the three rooms your mom insisted on, was two stories, and honestly, it was beautiful. You loved it. But the idea of living there alone was terrifying.
Still, the deal was sealed.
It didn’t take long—two weeks, tops. When your mom insisted on hiring an interior designer, you didn’t argue much. Secretly, you liked the idea. And once your belongings were packed, it was all done.
All that was left was you.
There weren’t many people to say goodbye to on the island, which was, honestly, fine. Who were you supposed to bid farewell to? Rafe? His family, who didn’t even know you were pregnant? Your friends, who’d probably broadcast the news to the world? No thanks.
Except for JJ.
You’d have been a total ass not to acknowledge his help. Even if his support wasn’t entirely physical, his presence had been a huge emotional lift.
So saying goodbye wasn’t hard.
Ignoring the support he’d given you would’ve been dumb. When you decided to give him a nice surfboard as a thank-you gift, you didn’t overthink it. You just thought about who JJ was—someone who loved the ocean and surfing. Beyond that? You didn’t know much. So you kept it simple. Spoiler alert: he liked it.
You hesitated, thinking a gift might make things unnecessarily sentimental, but he deserved it. Nobody else in his position would’ve treated you as kindly. Even Kooks barely treated each other well. Expecting a Pogue to go out of their way for you? Yeah, no.
But JJ had.
You weren’t super close, but during one of your conversations, he’d mentioned how much he liked the rare nights when his shift ended early. He worked at a pub. In your head, you’d given him two weeks before he got fired—or kicked out after starting a fight. You were that sure of it.
A week ago, knowing the end of his evening shift, you parked near the pub, sitting on your car hood to wait for him. The plan? Give him the surfboard. Maybe even give him a ride home if he needed one.
Fifteen minutes passed. He hadn’t come out.
You started questioning everything—maybe you’d gotten the wrong day? Or maybe you’d messed up the time?
Waiting around for nothing felt miserable. You should’ve paid better attention when he’d been talking about his schedule.
Not that the gift had been planned or anything. The idea had hit you on a whim. You just wanted to do something before you left. After all, there weren’t many people to say goodbye to. And texting JJ a quick see ya felt way too impersonal.
“What are you doing here?”
You snapped out of your thoughts, your eyes shooting up from your phone. JJ stood a few steps away, mid-turn before he stopped and faced you fully. His eyes scanned the car before landing on you.
Quickly, you shoved your phone into your pocket. “Making sure you didn’t pick another fight.” Sliding off the hood, you smirked.
JJ rolled his eyes, flashing you a sarcastic smile. “Ha-ha. How funny.”
Unlike him, your grin was genuine. Why should he have all the fun pissing people off? It was your turn.
Unlike him, your lips curled into a genuine smile. Was it always going to be him getting under your skin for his own amusement? No, this time, it was your turn.
You heard him say your name, his tone serious. “No, really. What are you doing here?”
Keeping surprises wasn’t exactly your specialty, but you couldn’t resist messing with him a little. After all, this was the first time in days you’d left the house—and only in your baggiest clothes. Might as well enjoy it.
“Just hanging out.”
He frowned, his eyes scanning the area before gesturing around. “Here? Outside the pub?”
The confusion on his face was nearly comical—borderline annoyed, maybe?
You mirrored his glance at the surroundings, raising your eyebrows. It wasn’t much to look at. Just… a place. “What’s wrong with here?”
JJ let out a frustrated sigh, and for a moment, you couldn’t believe you’d actually managed to annoy him. He genuinely looked upset. “Are you serious right now? You��” He stopped himself, clenching his jaw as he stepped closer. Lowering his voice, he added, “You can’t drink. You’re not even supposed to be hanging around.”
So, he thought you’d come here to drink? That’s why he was so worked up?
It was kind of… cute. But poking the bear was way more fun.
You let out a dramatic hum as you crossed your arms. “Not allowed? Says who?” You tried not to laugh at the look he shot you, a mix of exasperation and disbelief, like you’d lost your mind.
“Me. You’re not drinking. Not here, not anywhere. Have you lost it?”
Your lips pulled into a grin, and despite his attempt to scold you, his irritation only made it funnier. Especially since you hadn’t even done what he was accusing you of.
The second JJ caught onto what you were doing, his annoyed expression melted away. As your laughter echoed, he pinched the bridge of his nose, clearly unimpressed. “Yeah, yeah. Hilarious. Now, can you just tell me what you’re actually doing here?”
You clutched your stomach, your laughter dying down into a lingering smile. Sure, he wasn’t amused, but you were, and that’s all that mattered.
“I’ve got something for you.”
JJ’s eyebrows shot up. He straightened, intrigued. “Yeah?”
You stepped away from the car’s front, glancing back to see him still rooted in place. You gave him a quick head nod to follow. With a sigh, he finally moved. “If this is a gun for self-defense, just so you know, I’m not really clear on the rules here,” he joked with a wink.
You snorted, shaking your head. “Please. If I gave you a gun, you’d be arrested in, like, two seconds.”
He laughed, but you could tell he was curious now. Opening the back door, you reached inside. “It’s a thank-you gift. Kind of.”The surprise on his face was priceless. He clearly wasn’t expecting this. Honestly, neither were you until the idea struck.
JJ tilted his head, his expression skeptical. “Thank you? For what? For telling you not to pick fights?”
You rolled your eyes. He couldn’t be serious. “No, JJ. For helping me out.”
He smiled, but it was that classic, goofy grin of his. Any trace of his earlier irritation had completely vanished. He didn’t even glance into the car. “Oh, I get it. Like a ‘without JJ, my life would’ve fallen apart’ kind of thank you? Go on, feed my ego. I live for this.”
For a split second, you considered slamming the door and driving off. Instead, you laughed. Sure, there was some truth to what he said, but no way were you letting him win.
Taking a deep breath, you opened the door wider and stepped back. “Nope. It’s just a small gesture. Don’t read too much into it.”
JJ walked over and held the door open, his eyes going wide when he spotted the surfboard wedged into the backseat. His fingers ran over the smooth edges and the blue-and-white design. “You got this for me?” he asked, his voice softer now as he inspected it.
You couldn’t suppress your grin. “Yeah. I mean, I know it’s kind of random, but I figured you could use your own board for a change. For everything you’ve done—” You hesitated, trying to find the right words. “It meant a lot.”
JJ’s smile was different this time. It wasn’t cocky or teasing. It was genuine. “If I don’t take this, I feel like you’d be really annoying about it,” he muttered, pulling the board from the car.
“Absolutely. You wouldn’t want to hear me talk about how I poured my heart into its design,” you teased.
He froze, eyes narrowing. “Wait—you designed it?”
You smirked, holding his gaze. “No. But it’s nice that you believed it for a second.”
JJ laughed, shaking his head as he leaned the board against the car. For once, he wasn’t mocking or making jokes. Instead, he looked at you with something softer, something you couldn’t quite place. “This is… perfect. You didn’t have to do this.”
“I know. I just wanted to.”
He hesitated, glancing at the board before meeting your eyes again. “I was just trying to help. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”
And that was it, wasn’t it? That’s how it felt. Deep down, you’d even envied the way he was with his friends. He didn’t know you. In fact, he hated your group. But if he treated you like this—who knew how he treated his friends?
You weren’t used to people doing things for you without expecting something in return. Sure, you had a hunch JJ liked money. Not just you—everyone on the island knew that. But still, the way he talked to you, made time for you… it mattered. It broke the prejudice you had against him.
It wasn’t anything grand. He didn’t buy you houses or cars. He didn’t shower you with jewelry. But he talked to you like no one else did. He made you feel—like you were someone. Like someone whose decisions shouldn’t be dictated by anyone else’s words.
And that? That was worth more than jewelry. More than anything money could buy. It was something most people—Rafe included—didn’t have.
From the moment he heard, he didn’t tell anyone. What friend would do that? Ruthie? Sophie? Who?
JJ did.
And he wasn’t even your friend.
That’s why it mattered. He was just being himself, and you needed that.
“It felt like that.” JJ was holding the surfboard, his eyes catching yours. A strange silence fell between you. Neither of you had expected such a gesture—not just surfing, but the support he’d given you.
You hadn’t expected his support; that was his gesture to you. And he hadn’t expected a surfboard from you; that was your gesture to him.
JJ lifted the board to examine it, the usual smirk still on his face. He was clearly trying to ease the tension hanging between you. “So, I have my own board now, huh? I don’t have to give this one back, do I? Because when it comes to stuff like that, you’re pretty stubborn.”
“No, it’s yours,” you said, smiling. You were grateful for his teasing—it cut through the awkwardness. You could’ve stayed silent for hours. “But if I catch you getting into another fight, I’ll beat you with that board.”
JJ laughed, shaking his head. His gaze flicked between the board and you. He was ridiculously excited about the surfboard but trying hard not to show it. “Fair deal. But just so we’re clear, every cool move I pull off with this board? I’m crediting you. ‘Thanks to Princess for this wave,’ that kind of thing. You’re my sponsor now.”
You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t deny his antics made you laugh. He was fun to be around. You were glad the whole “status” nonsense between you two seemed to be fading. It wasn’t just you—he had his own assumptions about you too. But it felt like you’d both moved past that. “Okay. Sponsorship’s over. Go find your wave.”
JJ carefully propped the board against the wall, his expression softening. “Jokes aside, thanks. I mean it. This means a lot. Just don’t tell anyone I said that—gotta protect my image.” He smiled, dimples showing as he ran a hand through his hair.
You smiled back, nodding quickly. “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe.”
As you both grinned, JJ’s eyes flicked from you to the surfboard. Following his gaze, your eyes drifted to his hands, gently tracing the board like it was fragile.
“I’m leaving the island tomorrow.” The words tumbled out, and you saw his hands freeze. His gaze landed on you, but you kept your focus on the board, pretending to admire its design. It really was a beautiful surfboard. “So—I wanted to say thank you.”
His blue eyes pierced through you as if that was even possible. JJ didn’t say anything to make the moment heavier, just nodded. For several seconds, neither of you spoke. Realizing the air had gotten heavier, you shifted your tone to something more casual. “I could drive you home if you want.”
You weren’t the kind of person to offer, but making him carry a surfboard all the way home felt cruel.
JJ opened his mouth to respond, but a car horn blared from down the street. Both of you turned toward the sound. Outside the car, John B and Kiara were leaning against it, with Pope, Cleo, and Sarah visible through the windows. Pope waved at JJ from where he hung halfway out of the window.
When Sarah’s eyes met yours, you instinctively tugged at your shirt. There wasn’t anything visible, but still—you felt uneasy. “Wow,” you said, feigning amusement. “Your entourage is here.”
JJ hesitated, looking momentarily torn. Finally, he sighed, a guilty smile creeping onto his face. His gaze dropped to your hand still fidgeting with your shirt. For a split second, it seemed like he wanted to grab your hand, to stop you.
“Nothing’s showing,” he said, his eyes lingering on your waist. You knew that, but the idea of anyone finding out still terrified you. Especially someone from Rafe’s family. He didn’t want them to know, and neither did you. That’s why you felt the need to be extra cautious around Sarah and Wheezie.
“I know. It’s just—” You stopped, shutting your eyes briefly before opening them again. It was paranoia, but understandable. “Relax. No one knows, I swear.” His hand almost reached out to your arm, but he stopped, remembering his friends were watching from the car.
“Go,” you said, shrugging. You composed yourself. “Looks like you’ve got a ride after all.” You smiled.
JJ paused for a beat, then flashed a crooked smile. He hated the awkwardness lingering between you. “If this board isn’t as good as you said, you’re getting an earful. I’ll call you.” He walked backward, teasing. You couldn’t help but chuckle at his words.
As you walked toward your front door, you noticed his movements slow. He stopped, turned, and looked back at you. It was like he’d remembered something he’d forgotten to do. Placing the surfboard down gently, his eyes briefly darted away from yours.
Then he walked up to you and stopped right in front of you. After a brief, silent pause, you felt his arms wrap around you. Was he… hugging you? Seriously? The gesture caught both of you off guard. You’d never imagined this kind of closeness. But then again, you hadn’t imagined buying him a surfboard either. So, it didn’t feel wrong. If buying him a gift made you feel this close, then it wasn’t strange that he’d feel close enough to hug you.
You returned the gesture, wrapping your arms around him. His grip was firm, and the scent of salt and ocean filled your senses. How did he always smell so much like the sea?
The hug was short, but both of you felt the strangeness of it. Once again—you felt like you’d crossed a line. Broken some unspoken rule.
JJ shrugged as he pulled back. “Yeah, that’s it. See you, uh… whatever.”
You took a deep breath, watching him stand there. You hated goodbyes. You were going to miss this island, and now—
“Yeah… goodbye.” You pushed your hair behind your shoulders, trying to steady your voice. You didn’t understand why you felt like you were losing a friend. Like you were going to… miss him?
Stop. Don’t even think about it.
JJ nodded, picking up the surfboard as he walked toward the car. You watched him for a moment before turning to the front door and stepping into your car. Through the windshield, you caught a glimpse of Kiara muttering something to Sarah. Whatever she was saying, you couldn’t hear.
When JJ got into the car, he paused, lowering his head for a brief moment before looking outside again.
He mouthed something to the group. Not to you, but to the friends in the car. “Just shut up.”
When he gave you a quick nod, you returned it before starting your car. Watching them drive off, you felt a strange mix of relief and melancholy. You’d thanked JJ, and that was all you wanted. It was done.
Except for the quiet ache of losing a friend.
You’d left only a few clothes back at the house on the island. The furniture and everything else stayed in your room. Your parents insisted the room remain untouched—they wanted you to know there was still a home for you there. They even promised not to change a thing.
The first few months were bound to be hard; you knew that. Living alone was going to take some getting used to. But you hoped it’d all be worth it when you finally held your baby.
Now, you were sitting on the couch in your new place, sipping a green smoothie. You’d have given anything for a coffee, but pregnancy meant sacrifices. A little caffeine might not hurt, but you didn’t want to risk it. The smoothie was healthy, though it tasted awful.
It had only been six days since the move. You’d allowed yourself time to explore the area, taking walks around the quiet streets. Your parents had offered to stay with you for a few days, but you politely declined. You wanted to settle in on your own. Leaning on their warmth and presence only to have it ripped away later would have made the loneliness worse. You couldn’t let that happen.
Morning sickness had eased enough for a few walks, so you’d wandered the calm streets near your house. Quiet, orderly, nothing like Outer Banks. You couldn’t help but compare the two. Everything here was different. The people, the lifestyle—it all felt so structured and tame. But a part of you missed the chaos of the island. The freedom. The absurdity of going to the store in a bikini without anyone batting an eye. That tight-knit community where everyone knew each other’s names.
You’d visited the local park a few times. It was rarely crowded, and you hadn’t met anyone yet. By the time you arrived, most of the adults and kids were just beginning to trickle in.
So, here you were: your own place. Did that make you an adult?
How did adults even make friends? Scratch that—how did anyone past a certain age make friends? As a kid, it was easy. Just ask someone to play with you, and that was it. Middle school? Same thing.
But now? You didn’t know a soul here. What were you supposed to do? Walk up to someone and introduce yourself?
Terrifying thought.
Still, maybe worth trying, right?
-
Socializing wasn’t supposed to feel like this.
Your eyes scanned the park’s scenery. The leaves rustled gently in the breeze, and birds chirped in the branches above. A group of kids played in a sandbox, their laughter mingling with the faint sounds of distant traffic.
You clasped your hands over your stomach, exhaling deeply. “Maybe this is good for me,” you thought.
But the whole idea still felt horrifying. Sitting at home would’ve been worse, though. At least you were out, breathing fresh air.
Introducing yourself to someone, though? Out of the question. No anxiety attacks, but your chest tightened just thinking about it. No, you’d just sit and enjoy the park for a bit. That would be enough.
Your gaze dropped to the book in your lap: Healthy Nutrition and Development During Pregnancy. You fiddled with the corner of its cover. Would someone else find this funny? Carrying a guidebook instead of a novel wasn’t something even you would’ve expected a few months ago. But here you were, on the verge of a whole new chapter. Screw what anyone thought—you were preparing for your future.
Suddenly, the bench shifted slightly as someone sat down beside you. The movement snapped you out of your thoughts. You glanced up to find a middle-aged woman with an energetic demeanor. Her dyed-blond hair revealed a hint of gray at the roots, and a steaming coffee cup rested in her hands.
“Ugh, I hope I can finish this before it goes cold,” she muttered to herself before calling out to the playground. “Tati! No running, sweetheart!”
She waved toward the child before turning back to you with a wide smile.
“Lovely day, isn’t it?” she chirped.
You gave her a polite smile, nodding. “It is,” you replied, subtly shifting your book closer to your lap. Her eyes flicked to the book in your hands, narrowing slightly as if trying to make out the title. “Is that a… guidebook?” she finally asked.
You tilted your head slightly. “Yes,” you said simply, hoping that’d be enough to end the conversation.
“A pregnancy guide?” she pressed, her curiosity accompanied by a cheerful smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “How sweet! Helping out a sister or expecting a niece?—Oh, where are my manners? I’m Viola.”
Her question caught you off guard. You hesitated briefly before giving your name. “Uh, no. It’s for me,” you said with a small smile.
Her expression shifted instantly. Her eyes widened, her grin turning stiff and awkward. “For you? Oh…”
You nodded, feeling heat creep up your cheeks. She had seemed friendly at first, but the subtle judgment on her face now was impossible to ignore.
“How far along?” she asked, as if the question was perfectly natural.
“Sixteen weeks,” you mumbled, pretending to smooth the book’s pages. The weight of her gaze made your skin crawl.
“Ah, so young,” she murmured, taking a long sip from her coffee. When she lowered the cup, her eyes lingered on you, as though dissecting every detail. “How old are you, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“Twenty,” you replied, keeping your tone neutral but feeling the words land heavier than you intended. You watched her eyebrows knit together as she took a sharp breath.
“Twenty? You look barely old enough to drive!” she exclaimed, clearly not trying to be subtle. Then, almost conspiratorially, “But… you must be married, right?”
Your hands instinctively moved to rest on your stomach, but you hesitated to respond. The silence must have been answer enough because her eyes flicked from your belly back to your face.
“Oh,” she said knowingly, her smile tightening further. “So… is the father still in the picture?”
What was this, an interrogation?
You swallowed the lump forming in your throat. Was it the tone of her voice? Or the audacity of her questions? Whatever it was, it stung. “That’s not something I need to discuss with you,” you said firmly, fighting to keep the frustration out of your voice.
Viola shrugged, but her scrutinizing look didn’t waver. “Fair enough. But raising a baby at your age, and without… well, you know. It’s going to be tough. Don’t you think this was a bit… impulsive?”
Her words hit like a cold wind. You tightened your grip on your stomach and tilted your head slightly. “That’s none of your business,” you said, your voice harder now.
Viola didn’t back down. “Yes, maybe you’re right. But people talk, sweetheart. And usually, they judge the ones they think made the wrong decisions…” She paused, pursing her lips. “Well, they judge.”
That was all you needed to hear. You tucked your book under your arm like you were putting it in a bag, got up, and said, “I think it’s time for me to leave,” your tone colder than even you expected.
Viola raised a hand as if trying to smooth things over. “Oh, I didn’t mean to offend,” she said, but the look in her eyes betrayed the opposite. “I’m just saying this for your own good.”
You could shove your “thoughts” up your ass.
Turning on your heel, you walked toward the park’s exit. The sound of her coffee cup being placed on the bench and her murmuring words echoed behind you. A fresh start sounded nice, you thought. But a new beginning wasn’t a guarantee of escaping old judgments.
There was no way you were going out to socialize again anytime soon. You hated that woman. With every fiber of your being. The way she judged you with that smug little brain of hers—it made your blood boil. You had no memory of how you even made it back home.
You made yourself some hot cocoa, hoping it would calm your nerves. Honestly, lying flat in the grass wouldn’t have been enough to shake off the anger at this point.
Even though you tried to distract yourself—knowing full well that stress wasn’t good for the baby—it wasn’t working. The incident replayed in your mind on a loop. You were certain you’d shiver every time you walked past that park again.
Who did she think she was, anyway? How could someone pass judgment on a stranger like that? The sheer audacity—it was baffling.
The sound of your phone notification pulled you out of your spiraling thoughts. Glancing over, you reached for the phone resting on the couch.
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You waited for a reply, but when nothing came, you set the phone down again. At least one of you was having a good day. Even though you felt like you were on the verge of exploding, you took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.
The sudden ring of your phone startled you. You looked over, eyes narrowing slightly in surprise. JJ Maybank was calling you. Right now.
Pressing the phone to your ear, you grabbed the half-full cocoa mug from the table with your other hand. You weren’t going to drink it anymore. You were too annoyed to even think about washing it, but you figured you could at least move it somewhere out of sight. JJ’s voice came through the speaker, and despite everything, a small smile crept onto your face. For all his antics, he was a decent guy.
Heading toward the kitchen, you heard the cheerfulness in his voice as he began, “Used it this morning.” He was talking about the surfboard, excitement practically dripping from his words.
Frowning slightly, you placed the mug on the counter. This morning? Shouldn’t he have been at work? “This morning? Weren’t you supposed to be at work?”
There was a brief pause before JJ let out a muffled laugh. “Got fired,” he said casually, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Honestly, with him, it kind of was. You couldn’t help but laugh a little.
You weren’t surprised—of course, you weren’t. With the phone still pressed to your ear, you wandered over to the window and glanced outside. “Figured,” you said, your voice laced with playful sarcasm.
JJ didn’t miss a beat, his tone now teasingly accusatory. “Wait a second. Did you bet on me?”
Smiling, you shook your head even though he couldn’t see it, your attention momentarily caught by a cat wandering down the street. JJ cleared his throat, bringing you back. “No, but I wish I had,” you said.
His response came in the form of a dramatic groan. “That’s the meanest thing I’ve heard all week. You’re better than this.”
You turned around and walked toward the kitchen, your tone a little sharper now. “Get used to it.”
JJ responded immediately, his voice carrying a hint of challenge. “Never,” he shot back. Then, after a brief pause, his tone softened, but he added a teasing edge. “Pregnancy hormones have turned you into a completely different person. And it’s only been six days.”
The way he always knew how to push your buttons—and somehow make you smile instead of snap—was maddening. You found yourself tapping the corner of the table with your fingers, a habit you didn’t even notice until it happened. “I take pride in that,” you said, a playful grin tugging at your lips.
JJ came back stronger, more confident this time. “Hey, do you think it’s the hormones, or is it because you haven’t seen my handsome face for six whole days?” There was that familiar cocky tone, but you could tell he was trying to make you laugh. “I’d bet everything it’s because you haven’t seen my handsome face.”
“Even your surfboard?” you teased, your voice lifting just enough to show you were fully invested in the banter now. You moved toward the living room and dropped onto the couch, your gaze briefly flitting to the TV. But your attention was fully locked on JJ.
“Not a chance,” he replied instantly, almost defensive. “The board’s off-limits. Too precious.”
You chuckled, grabbing the nearby blanket and pulling it over your lap. “Then you’ve lost everything except the surfboard,” you said, shaking your head in mock disapproval. JJ’s laugh echoed through the phone, rich and warm, before he quipped, “You’ve been extra rude lately,” his voice carrying a mix of mock hurt and teasing amusement.
You didn’t just roll your eyes—you sank deeper into the couch, grabbing a pillow to prop yourself up. Of course, he’d called just to mess with you. Was he bored? Had he decided you were the best target for entertainment? “I’ve always been like this,” you replied with a shrug he couldn’t see.
“Nope,” JJ shot back instantly, his tone softer but still certain. A brief silence followed, filled only by the sound of your own breathing, before he spoke again. This time, his voice was a little more sincere. “So… how’s it going? Living alone and all?”
You didn’t hate that he asked. Actually, it felt nice to talk to someone. As an adult—or whatever weird in-between phase you were in—socializing wasn’t exactly easy. It hadn’t been easy on the island either, but at least that had been your choice. This wasn’t.
You took a deep breath, realizing the question was harder to answer than you’d expected. “It sucks,” you admitted finally, the honesty not surprising you in the slightest.
“Why?” JJ’s voice was softer now, laced with just enough concern to feel genuine but not suffocating. It was like he always knew how to navigate these moments without overstepping. And honestly, it was strange—good strange.
You tried to sort through the chaos in your head. “I don’t know,” you said with a faint sigh. “I haven’t really connected with anyone. I don’t know anyone here.”
JJ, ever the problem-solver in his own weird way, jumped in with his trademark ease. “Then make friends with the stray cats,” he said, that classic carefree tone of his bringing a smile to your face despite everything.
“I already have you,” you teased back, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “I couldn’t possibly betray you.”
His laugh from the other end of the line was contagious. “Not funny.” 
Fidgeting with the edge of the blanket, you hesitated before mumbling, “Are you okay? How are you?” Somehow, over the phone, it felt easier to ask—less intimidating than it would’ve been face-to-face.
“I’m amazing,” JJ said, his voice taking on a flat, almost robotic tone that screamed deflection.
“Your ego is exhausting,” you retorted, matching his sarcasm. Why couldn’t he just answer the question for once? Did everything have to be a game? “Seriously. How are you? After… you know, that day.”
JJ exhaled deeply, and when he finally spoke, his voice was quieter, almost reluctant. “I don’t live with my dad anymore.”
You sat up straighter, grabbing the remote to lower the TV’s volume. “Wait, really?”
“Yeah,” he said simply, like it wasn’t a big deal. “Packed up my stuff and left.”
It wasn’t exactly shocking. In fact, you were relieved he’d done it. Knowing he’d been living with someone who hurt him was unbearable. But still, you couldn’t stop your brow from furrowing. You couldn’t shake the worry. “Are you staying with John B?”
JJ’s silence was unexpected. You listened to the sound of his breathing, the faintest hitch before he finally answered. “Kind of?”
“What does that mean?” Your voice sharpened with concern. Why was he dancing around the answer when he could just tell you?
JJ sighed again, his tone shifting as though he’d stepped further away from the phone. “They don’t know I left yet. And I don’t want to talk about it.”
He hadn’t told his closest friends? Why? They weren’t the type to judge him. You didn’t know them well, but you were sure of that much. It didn’t make sense.
Even as your worry grew, you knew pressing him wasn’t the right move. “So where are you staying?” you asked cautiously.
JJ’s tone hardened. “I said I don’t want to talk about it.” There it was—his three-year-old tantrum mode. Did he really think people didn’t have the right to worry about him? Idiot.
You pinched the bridge of your nose, already feeling your patience wearing thin. “As your friend, I’m allowed to be concerned about your safety, JJ. Just tell me where you’re staying.”
His tone shifted again, this time lighter, more teasing. “Friend, huh? That’s nice. Kook and Pogue forever.”
“Shut it,” you snapped, your irritation clear. All you wanted was to know he was safe. “Just tell me already.”
JJ paused, then let out a soft laugh—the kind you knew was covering up something deeper. Even a toddler could tell. “I stayed with them for a few days. Been figuring it out since.”
You frowned. That wasn’t a solution. “You need to tell them,” you said gently.
He responded with the same stubbornness you’d come to expect, but his tone hinted at a smirk. “This is my problem, princess.” Then, as if to shift the mood, he added, “This is the first time we’ve talked on the phone. Cute, right? Now, tell me about your day.”
Despite the worry gnawing at you, you relaxed just a little. He wouldn’t be joking around like this if things were terrible… right?
You hoped so cause—JJ is your friend.
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lecl3rcw · 1 day ago
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Keeping Up With The Leclercs |
a/n: this is the more detailed version of the chapters!! y/n has no face claim, the pictures I use are just for reference.
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It was an unusually rainy day in Monte Carlo as the Leclerc twins sat at their mother’s house. y/n was on live with her fans building a lego set while arthur was playing the piano in the back.
“y/n what’s the lip oil you use, it’s so pretty, aw thankyou! I use the Dior lip oil in the shade poppy coral!” She smiles showcasing the product before putting it away.
“oh by the way, I’m back home in Monaco for a bit so that’s my brother playing the piano, he’s very good at it” she says as she continues to build a Lego sit, well atleast until her brother arthur comes into the screen.
“c'est tellement moche” that’s so ugly he says chuckling as her jaw drops. “tu es du genre à parler” you’re one to talk
Soon, Arthur had started helping her as the soft rain pattered against the window of their maman’s cozy house. “y/n who’s your favorite sibling, hmm…” she goes into deep thinking as arthur looks at her expectantly, “Lorenzo” she simply says as arthur scoffs “Not your twin brother?” “…definitely not” she chuckles as they engage in their usual sibling banter.
“I guess someone’s upset a certain someone is out of their league” Arthur nudges her, she gave him a warning look, “aw what’s the matter? You upset that Jo-” before he could finish she puts a hand on his mouth “fermez-la!” Shut up!
arthur chuckles as he nodded “bien sûr chéri” sure cheri he says as they continue building it. It was a studio ghibli's "howls moving castle" and it was so cute. Once they were finished they showed it to the people watching the live, “it’s so cute!” She says admiring their work. It was late so they decided to end the live saying goodbyes to everyone who watched.
y/n.leclcerc posted a story
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liked by alexandrasaintmleux, charlesleclerc, charlottedipietro and 67,000 more…
Now, she was in the middle of packing up her suitcase as Arthur scrolled through his phone laying down on her bed. "So how long are you going to be in the US for?" Arthur casually asks, "hmm about a month, and then ill meet up with Charles and Alexandra in Venice for a bit" she says as she packed everything.
"Damn, booked a lot of jobs for once? I'm surprised anyone would cast your ugly face" he chuckles making her roll her eyes, "don't you have some relationship problems to worry about" she fires back making his face drop. "Thats not fair! you know Carla-" before he finishes, their mother Pascale comes in as well.
"Salut Maman" hello mama they say unanimously, as she smiled at them. "Tu pars déjà ?" you're leaving already? she asks y/n as she sighs, "oui mama" yes mama she says hugging her mom. Pascale wraps her arms around the girl tightly, "ton voyage a paru si court, reviens plus souvent à Monaco ma petite fille" your trip felt so short, come back to Monaco more often my little girl. y/n smiles, "I promise I will maman" she says as she packs the last of her things.
Pascale takes a seat next to Arthur on y/n's bad, "so what all do you have planned for the month?" Arthur asks. y/n sits down, "I'm actually not sure, Lucille sent me an entire list of my schedule, I'm actually so grateful for my manager" she chuckles as she pulls up her schedule on the phone. "How is Lucille by the way?" Arthur says his cheeks a bit red, she glares at him "You stay away from Lucille" she says as his face drops "What! why!" he says as Pascale looks at them in confusion, "why cherie?" she asks confused as well.
"A. you're a terrible boyfriend, B. you have to sort things out with Carla because I love her, and C. I'm not going to let you mess up a good thing going on for me" she says crossing her arms, Arthur groans "I am not!" he says to his twin who scoffs "Do you know the amount of friendships I have lost because of you and Charles?" she says. "Fine fine ill stay away from Lucille quelle galère" what a drag he says rolling his eyes. "Maman tell him to stay away from Lucille" she says, "ok ok je pense qu'il comprend" ok ok i think he gets it she says in her usual soft voice. Once things settle down, Arthur and Pascale exit the room so that she could get some rest before her very long and tiring flight.
The next morning as she's brushing her teeth she gets a call from Lucille, "Goodmorning y/n! I just sent you a screenshot of the boarding pass!" Lucille chirps, "Thankyou so much Lucille, ill see you when I land" she says as she hangs up. She quickly gets her hand bag ready making sure she has her essential such as her passport, and some self care products.
Arthur and Pascale drive her to the airport, she hugs both of them tightly, "I'll miss you guys" she says pulling away, "yeah yeah I guess I will too" Arthur says playfully rolling his eyes to which she punches his shoulder. "oh ma petite fille, envoie-moi un message quand tu atterris" oh my little girl, text me when you land as she pulls y/n into another tight hug to which she reciprocates. "oui maman" yes mama she says before finally going into the line. "she waves to them with a quick I love you and before she knows it, she's on the plane.
y/n.leclerc's story
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charlesleclerc replied > safe travels cherie!
alexandrasaintmelux replied > see you soon ange!
she smiles as she responds to their messages, she shuts her phone off after a while. Her head resting on the airplane window as she extends her legs since she was in first class. her work in the US hadn't even started yet and she was already feeling so stressed. she had 38 modeling shoots, two runways, and about 7 public events, one of them including seeing one of her biggest crushes in just a month. she decides to just shut her eyes and let it go to the back of her head.
y/n.leclerc
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monaco 24' you will be missed <3 @ alexandrasaintmleux, @ arthurleclerc, @ chanel
liked by lorenzotl, charlesleclerc, and 1,200,0000 others.....
alexandrasaintmleux mon petit amour💌 my little love
^ y/n.leclerc mon ange 💞 my angel
lorenzotl vous me manquez les gars ☹️ miss you guys
^ y/n.leclerc tu me manques davantage😔💞 miss you more
chanel that's our ambassador!🫡
^ y/n.leclerc my fav brand💌
lec1ercs sososo pretty
lilymean1 your white dress is so pretty! where's it from!
^ y/n.leclerc Chanel! the 2023 summer drop :)
asmcloset I love her friendship with Alex
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dissapointu · 3 days ago
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hi!! may you do how arcane characters would react to their partner who is a famous model?
OMG YESSSS,
Jinx
“Wait, so, like… everyone stares at you for a living?” She’s jealous, obviously. But also super proud. She’ll crash your photo shoots, swinging from the rafters yelling, “THAT’S MY GIRL! LOOK AT HER FACE! LOOK AT IT!!!”
Also, don’t be surprised if she “borrows” some of your outfits and makes her own chaotic Jinx remix versions.
Vi
At first, Vi’s like, “Cool, you’re a model, whatever.” Then she sees you in one of your campaigns—posing in some ridiculously hot outfit—and she’s just like, “DAMN, THAT’S MINE?!” She’ll play it off with cocky comments like, “Guess I have to fight everyone now since they’re all looking at you.” But secretly, she’s your biggest fan and has your pictures saved on her Hextech phone.
Sevika
She’s unimpressed at first. “Modeling, huh? That’s nice.” But the moment she sees you walking a runway, her drink almost falls out of her hand. After that, she’s in full bodyguard mode, standing at your side looking scary AF whenever you’re in public.
“Let them look. But if anyone touches, they’re losing a hand,” she mutters while adjusting her mechanical arm.
Silco
He’s the type to be quietly supportive, but deep down, he loves that everyone’s obsessed with you. During arguments, he’ll smirk and say, “Funny, isn’t it? The most desired person in the world is sitting here arguing with me.”
He’ll pay for entire ad campaigns just to see your face plastered across Zaun. “It’s business,” he claims, but he’s just a simp.
Vander
Vander’s a little confused at first. “So… people pay you to stand around and look nice?” But when he sees you working, he’s like, “Oh, I get it now.” He’s so proud it’s borderline embarrassing, constantly bragging about you to his bar patrons.
“That’s my girl,” he says with a soft smile every time your picture pops up. Ugh, sweet dad energy.
Ekko
Ekko’s OBSESSED. “You’re a model and my partner? Talk about hitting the jackpot!” He’ll build you custom gadgets to make your life easier, like portable fans for shoots or little mirrors in your jewelry.
Also, he’ll 100% steal your sunglasses and walk around like he’s in a photo shoot himself, striking dumb poses and saying, “I learned it from the best.”
Jayce
Jayce is over the moon. “My partner is a model? Hell yeah!” He’ll take every chance to hype you up to literally everyone. “Did you see her latest campaign? She’s stunning, right?!”
But he’s also low-key insecure sometimes, like, “What do you see in me? I’m just a nerd with a hammer.” You’ll have to remind him that he’s hot, too.
Viktor
Viktor is quietly amazed. He’ll act like it’s no big deal, but you catch him staring at your magazine spreads for way too long. “The lighting is impressive,” he’ll mutter, pretending it’s all about the photography.
He’s secretly in awe of how confident you are. On bad days, he’ll say, “You know, you’re too good for me, but I’m selfish, so I’m keeping you anyway.”
Caitlyn
Caitlyn’s the ultimate supportive girlfriend. She’s at every runway show, clapping politely but beaming with pride. Afterward, she’ll wrap you in her arms and say, “You looked breathtaking out there.”
Also, she’s so classy that she’ll casually mention your career to people like it’s no big deal, but inside she’s like, “Yeah, that’s MY girl, and she’s flawless.”
Mel Medarda
Mel is completely unfazed. “Of course, you’re a model. I wouldn’t settle for anything less.” She’ll attend your events in couture outfits that match yours, turning the whole thing into a power couple moment.
She’ll also help you navigate the industry with ruthless efficiency. “Darling, fire your agent. I’ll find someone better.”
Ambessa Medarda
Ambessa is low-key smug about it. “You’re the most beautiful person in the room, and I get to take you home? Lucky me.” She’ll escort you to every event like a queen guarding her treasure, daring anyone to look too long.
She’s also the type to say something wildly inappropriate, like, “I could rip that dress off you right now,” while you’re on the red carpet.
Cecil B. Heimerdinger
Heimerdinger doesn’t really get modeling, but he supports you nonetheless. “Fascinating! Humans are drawn to symmetry and aesthetics, it seems.” He’s full of technical compliments like, “The angle of your posture was impeccable in that last shoot.”
Also, he’ll make you a tiny model of one of your outfits because he’s precious like that.
Salo
Salo acts like he doesn’t care, but he’s secretly super proud. “You’re a model? Huh. I guess that explains the constant photographers.” He’ll act like it’s no big deal, but he’s staring at your campaign posters like a lovesick puppy when no one’s watching.
Scar
Scar is SO hyped about it. “You’re a model? That’s badass!” he’ll hype you up every chance he gets, like, “Look at you, absolutely killing it!”
Also, he will definitely try to jump into your photo shoots, striking silly poses until someone kicks him out.
Maddie Nolen
Maddie is obsessed with you and not subtle about it. “I knew I was dating a goddess, but damn!” She’ll brag about you to literally everyone and start casually slipping into conversations like, “Oh, yeah, my partner? A literal supermodel.”
She’ll also steal your wardrobe for herself. “What? You look good in it, and so do I!”
Lest
Lest is super supportive in a quiet way. She'll attend your shows, sitting in the back with a soft smile, just proud of you. Afterward, she’ll hand you a little flower she picked on the way and say, “You were wonderful.”
She doesn’t fully understand the fashion world, but she thinks you’re amazing and tells you so every chance he gets.
TL;DR: Everyone is absolutely floored by your beauty. They’re either simping, bragging, or plotting to fight anyone who gets too close. You’re the it girl of their world.
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cicadabooks · 2 days ago
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aaaaa finally i feel justified for reluctantly finishing the first Monk and Robot book with a :/ face, and then feeling even more :/ :/ :/ about reading the 2nd book. Which I did not read, and it looks like this was the correct choice, for me.
"Underbaked" is a decent summary of the first book - people (....often white people I feel like....) would recommend the book and how they loved it, and when I finally read it, I was just like.... This author is over-reaching and floundering around in areas she doesn't know much about. (And also this book felt very White Person writing world building to me.) Even the final pep talk by Mosscap rubbed me the wrong way. It was obvs just Not the Book For Me. (Also winning a Hugo.... It's not the worst book, but...? I think people are being bamboozled a bit.)
I remember the author's approach to nature was weird. I remember thinking "people live in nature, we're part of nature, and to just have the two drastically split is disturbing. Also I don't think this author has ever actually walked through the woods, or at least not more than three times."
OP's line above ("The Robot Side is kept wild and humans are discouraged from going in there because humans can't be trusted not to ruin Nature.") is making me specifically remember what I didn't like. :( wtf. Are indigenous people and their land stewardship a joke to you. Where were you when the Dakota Access Pipeline protests were happening last decade. That was a large amount of news. At this point, this is a you problem, Becky Chambers.
Also shoutout to "also tbh I think Becky chambers has also just never gone fishing in her life and was not curious enough about her own concept to research how you're supposed to kill a fish" in the comments section from OP -
Because, as I mentioned earlier, I had the same reaction even in book one!? About doubting if the author actually spent time in nature, or considered nature a lot, or knew much about nature (for a book that... spends time in nature...). Neither the first book's vibes, or this wretched fish thing, are the vibes of people I know who spend time in the wild (as a hobby or professionally).
(Also, I think those people I know, and me, and many other humans, would be miserable being cut off from wild nature. Some things are just in the blood. I was always yearning for the ocean growing up, and I swear it was handed down to me by blood from my mother who grew up on an island. When I finally lived in a place near the ocean and got to be in ocean waters a lot more, I was like YES I AM HOME and happy in my bones. Every time I get too sad it's because I have spent too much time away from ocean and some proper wilderness.)
(and we're not even getting into how much human culture, esp indigenous cultures, have cultural transmissions tied in with nature.)
(Like I know OP's essay was more examining passivity and the implications at large in these books.... Whereas looking back, I think I got stuck on "Humans aren't allowed to go into nature" in book one and I was horrified by this and I never got past this part. This book was a dystopia for me.)
Anyway OP thank you for summarizing the 2nd book, yikes and also that was fun to read.
Also this is all ironic/sad because I actually liked the author's first book! When I read it years ago. (A Long Way to a Small Angry Planet) It was fun! I love me a motley crew of people in space ships becoming friends and having adventures. I had issues with the handling of sex/gender stuff, but at the time I gave it a pass. The rest of the books in that series didn't stand out to me, but I picked up whatever the author wrote anyway. I was disappointed when I picked up these monk robot books more recently. We're not even having, like... having that much fun here :( There's apparently fish dying in bizarre ways.
ykw i am having so much fan watching you be a hater, that i’ve decided to ask for more. PLEASE give us a rant about a book you hated.
Haha aw I'm honored. And uh I hope you don't have any particular attachment to Becky Chambers. Sorry in advance.
But A Psalm for the Wild-Built won a Hugo and I do not get the love. Book 1 was nice enough, yeah. Book 2 had me tearing my hair out.
Sibling Dex is a restless Tea Monk who serves the God of Small comforts on the science-fantasy planet of Panga. I genuinely love the idea of a tea monk - part therapist, part confessor, travels around to the different towns, mixes tea blends for people, lets them talk about their worries and fears and stresses, and gives them, if not advice, then sympathy and a listening ear and some calming tea. This is meaningful work but they're unhappy. After doing this for a while they're still unsatisfied with their life, so they go into the woods searching for self-actualization, and meet a robot named Mosscap, a wild robot that lives in the woods. See, hundreds of years ago, all the robots "woke up" and became sentient one day, then they staged a quiet rebellion against humanity's greed and industrialization by walking into the woods and never coming back. Now, the continent is split in half: humans stay on the Human Side, and robots stay on the Robot Side. The Robot Side is kept wild and humans are discouraged from going in there because humans can't be trusted not to ruin Nature. The rpbots are welcome to come to the Human Side, they just never have. Dex is the first person in a While to venture into the woods of the Robot Side, and the first human since the great walkout to see a robot. Mosscap gives Dex a lot of philosophical pep talks about not pushing themself so hard, about allowing themself to just rest and appreciate the world without feeling like they need to be Providing A Service to justify their existence. It's a nice theme. Underbaked, imo, but nice. Relateable.
Book 2 was a goddamn mess.
Book 1 mostly takes place in the wilderness of the woods, so it's okay if the nice utopian human community Dex comes from was sketchily-built. It Just Works, and everyone Is Just Nice, this is a science-fantasy parable. There were some issues I had with it - like the strict ideological and physical divide between Nature and Humans, and the fact that Dex's religion seems to be the Only Religion In The World, and it's vaguely secular-humanist with the gods being not "really" gods but names given to primordial forces and philosophical concepts, and the religion not really making any demands of its adherents in any way except to become their best selves and devote themselves to what they like... it's potentially interesting, but overall kinda lazy. It felt like Becky Chambers was aware of the idea that having an enlightened-atheist sci-fi utopia is Problematic, so she made there be a central religion, but she also didn't want it to have any of the ~icky~ things religions have, like belief in anything supernatural, or dietary restrictions, or creeds, or codes of behavior, or expectations to make any kind of sacrifice in any way. All the gods "ask" is that humans observe and appreciate the world. But whatever.
In book 2, Dex and Mosscap return to Dex's society, and the book seems to want to explain how the world works, and oh my GOD is Chambers not prepared to do this.
"Observe and appreciate" is all anyone is asked to do. Book 2, A Prayer for the Crown-Shy, is an ode to ultimate virtue of Doing Nothing. There's this attitude I see in a LOT of utopian fiction, where the author is bluntly just not a good enough author to imagine a utopian society where people act like people, so in the world of Panga, utopian society is achieved through 1) homogeneity 2) no one giving a crap about anything.
As far as I can tell, there is the one religion. Most people are Fine with this. Most people are Fine with anything. There are no characters with distinct personalities. There's no money, except there is, except it's not real money and no one will deny you anything if your balance is in the red, even though your balance is available to be seen by anyone - this does not cause any kind of shame or pride or competition in any way, and Dex doesn't understand why it might. There are no hierarchies or governing bodies, people just volunteer to step up when things need doing (this is portrayed as great and not deeply concerning). There are different communities, but in them, everyone is uniformly nice, friendly, and helpful at all times. There are some parts of nature, like the seashore, where people are not allowed to go because they'll ruin the environment, and this is accepted as correct and necessary. Most people live in hippie, pro-recycling, high-tech, end-of-history green communities; there's one group they visit, however, that doesn't trust technology, and lives in a vaguely sci-fi-Amish way. You might think, Dex travelling around with a robot, this might cause conflict! It does not. The people from this community calmly explain their anti-technology position, Dex calmly explains their pro-technology position, and they politely respect each other. "Not bothered either way" is a phrase that turns up in various permutations a lot and is held up as the good, mature, responsible way to be.
There's a scene where they catch a fish for dinner, and instead of killing it, the scifi-Amish guy says "We let the air do that for us, and they let the fish slowly suffocate to death in the air while they all look on solemnly and sadly. This is portrayed as a deep, beautiful moment of them witnessing and honoring the final moments of a living being's life. And not. y'know. them torturing a living being to death so they can keep their own hands clean.
This is what I mean about the valorization of passivity: observing is all you are ever obligated to do. Letting a fish die in the air is better than killing it quickly and humanely, because doing things gets your hands dirty, while letting things simply happen is the Correct way to do it.
At the end, Mosscap and Dex blow off all their promises and appointments and just hang out at the beach chilling out instead, because do what you want forever, you don't have to do shit. This is the happy affirming ending. Mosscap you fucking said you'd meet with the city leaders as the robot ambassador to the humans, did you tell them you were blowing off this commitment because you didn't feel like doing that anymore??? Did you even let them know??????
It is SUCH a baffling book. The theme wants to be "you are more than your job, you deserve to just Be" and ends up feeling like "you don't have to do anything ever, and no one can make you do anything you don't want to do if you don't feel like it, and you don't owe anyone anything and searching for a purpose in your life is just making you stressed out so chill at the beach instead."
The thing that drives me crazy is like. Mosscap cheerfully tells Dex about robots that spend twenty years in a cave watching stalactites form because they think it's beautiful, and those robots are just as much a valued part of society as anyone else. Appreciating beauty and wonder is good enough, you don't need to be productive. And I'm just. fuckin. like. Humans are not robots! Robots don't need to eat or sleep! Humans need food, and clothes, and shelter, and medical care, and if we don't have SOMEONE working to provide that, we Die! Nice as it would be, we CAN'T just all do nothing forever until we feel like it! We can't do that!
And at the same time, the book bizarrely treats wanting a purpose in life as like... almost disordered. If you are seeking a purpose in life it's because you just haven't let go of your guilt and relaxed enough. It's bizarre. Valorization of passivity. Humans aren't meant to be in nature so we just Shouldn't. Doing nothing and having no strong opinions is the most self-affirmed you can possibly be. Letting a fish suffocate is more moral than quickly breaking its neck or spiking its brain. Someone else will do it. Who, if we're all supposed to be resting and only doing what we feel like? Don't worry about it.
"The heart of this book is comfort [...] There is nothing in it that can hurt you." YOU LIAR BECKY CHAMBERS THE FISH SCENE STILL DISTURBS AND UPSETS ME TO THIS DAY
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honeygrahambitch · 1 day ago
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"I'm done. I am no longer cooking, Hannibal." Bedelia announced as she walked into the large living room of their house in Florence.
Hannibal was holding a glass of wine as he was staring into nowhere, as if his own mind was slowly consuming him.
"Get up and cook." She ordered as she threw a kitchen towel towards him, finally making him flinch. It almost knocked his glass of wine which he was gracefully careful with. "Did you already finish the bottle? It's 3 in the afternoon."
Hannibal hummed as he looked at the empty bottle then returned his attention to his glass. "I like to pair the merlot with melancholy."
"Will Graham again?"
He sighed. "Did you happen to buy more wine?"
"What even is your problem? Will Graham's act was in the end...romantic."
"Being sold to the FBI is such a romantic act, you are perfectly right."
"He did not sell you to the FBI. If anything, he betrayed Jack Crawford, not you."
"He did not betray Jack Crawford." Hannibal said, his voice slightly louder. "We were supposed to leave together. He set in flames everything we have been building in the last few months."
"We both know Will Graham was only trying to convince himself he was pretending. Don't ignore the meaning behind the call he gave you, Hannibal. That's an act of love."
"Why does it feel like he stabbed me, then? I feel like I have been bleeding on my kitchen's floor since then."
"If you consumed less wine, all your endless reflection would reach an end." Bedelia said exasperated. "Even so, you miss him."
"I miss him. I miss his aftershave and sarcasm. And his accusing glances. There was something in his eyes that always seemed to scold me. At the same time I could tell by only looking at his smile that he wanted to give in." Hannibal said as he stared at his now empty glass. "We did spend some beautiful evenings together. I refuse to believe the confessions he made were nothing but genuine. He does this thing...when he is really focused on what he is saying...he doesn't blink at all. Which is a lot considering he doesn't look people in the eye. And it's the way light and darkness fell on his face that often made me wonder if I am staring at a sculpture that would make David pale."
"Are you done? I am starving."
"Me too."
It was not food that he needed.
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i-cant-sing · 23 hours ago
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You know it’s kinda a good thing Baldwin and Salauddin didn’t live in the modern day with Tim traveler reader. cause can you imagine those two with cell phones?
Baldwin would be non stop texting. Every minute with new things to say to her. And it’s never paragraphs. No he’s texting single sentences at her.
Salauddin would be the worst to text. Like reader texts him a long paragraph about her feelings and he just comes back with “k.” And if she sends him pictures or anything he takes half the day to respond and even then it’s a dry one word answer.
ACCURATE😭😭😭😭
Cause imagine being in class or at work and your phone's just buzzing nonstop with Baldwin's texts, and you'd think it's because he has an emergency or in danger or something, but it's just him messaging you that he saw two pigeons today and they were cannodling and it reminded him of you, but then he got too jealous of the birds so he threw bread at them to scare them away. And there's a picture of him with the birds cuddling with the the text "aww! Miss u babe!🩷🩷" And then its followed by a video of him throwing bread canon balls at them with him laughing manically in the background and he texts "hurry up and get home before I destroy more animal couples🥰"
And then there's Salauddin and he's the driest texter ever. My brother could not for the life of him, keep the convo going and you could just be telling him the JUICIEST GOSSIP and he'd respond "Ok." And you would think that he just doesn't care about you enough to read your messages but in reality, you could actually quiz him and he'd tell you every detail to the T! He reads into your body language, the way you text, your tone, he studies you obsessively which is why he doesn't need to respond the way normal people do, lest you try to read between the lines and decide you don't like him. He just doesn't wanna give himself away. It's not that he's not good with words, in fact, he's an excellent poet! Salauddin would write the most loving poems for his beloved, but that's something he's saving for a special occasion, like... a wedding anniversary.
I also think that with phones and the technology, Baldwin for sure would keep tabs on you at all times! He's good at hacking, excellent at cyber security and breaching it. Besides, it's just sooo easy to get into your accounts, be just needs to make sure no creep is taking advantage of you.
As for Salauddin, while yes, he could have someone hack into your phone, he prefers to keep you safe by actually having professional bodyguards/assassins that are excellent at hiding in the shadows and being invisible to keep you safe from all the creeps when he's not around to punch them. Even when he takes you out on dates, that fancy restaurant is actually a safehouse of sorts. All the other customers there are hired professionals and their main job is to detect anyone who could target you or him. He has snipers on nearby buildings, ready to take care of anyone who tries to enter the closed off street to the restaurant with suspicious intent.
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wishfulsketching · 19 hours ago
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So. That was Arcane. As a whole.
Best episode of the season was episode 7. I might be a bit biased thanks to Silco and Vander living it up as their older selves but also, Ekko is truly the mvp of the show.
I hmm. Well. Victor. I see what was going on there. I see the vision. I loved lot of it. I had the sudden realizations of "that's Victor, right" before it happened....dude looked more like Jesus than ever before too. But uhh. Hmm. Hmm. There is like a chapter missing between s1 and s2 with Victor. Or more like mid season 2 chapter. Love my boy still. I did not care for his Machine Herald look. I liked the idea of the face being split. It hmm. I feel like they said, instead of showed, a lot with Victor this season.
My controversial opinion: Isha was unnecessary. The black rose mage stuff was unnecessary. Same end result could've been achieved with other means. Vi was just there to experience things and be sad. Jinx can't have shit and should suffer all the time, I guess.
BUT
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Nice
My man was a positive voice for Jinx. Uhhh in a way. Kinda made her go suicidal but like, he was trying. He is always trying. Even after death. Maybe after his hallucination talk people will understand that Silco wasn't just a evil dude with evil things to do, he was as trapped as everyone else in Zaun and wanted to break free.
Tho, I doubt it. The main enemy in Arcane is the class divide. In my eyes.
I do love the exploration of Hextech and how using magic in a technological way can be super dangerous and fuck shit up. I wanted to see that. And I did see that in season 1, when Jayce realizes how dangerous the hextech weapons are! Exploring the time loop and how abstract magic is, was great! I just.
I love this show. Very much. Season 1, no notes. It's made for me.
Season 2 seems like a people pleaser. And I am pleased! Yet I also wanted something different.
I am still happy because I got my vindication. Zaundads is canon, fuck yeah! No man looks at another man like that and is not in love with them!
I loved that they kept that Vander still tried to kill Silco. Silco went "yea ok that ass too good to quit. What is little murder between lovers, anyway. Come here bby"
Only thing. Silco should've interacted with Jinx in the alternative timeline. A simple "you look beautiful" when she has her entrance or "hey here's snack have fun building whatever you guys are building. Don't make too much noise, your father and I need to get up early tomorrow ok bye bye my perfect little genius"
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weeping-statue · 2 days ago
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Oml I love your work sm, I’ve been reading you’re blog for a while and I’m obsessed 😭
If you end up having the time, may I request Naib, Ithaqua, Joseph and Richard—or just the first two if that’s too many! 🤍—with a s/o who was almost fatally injured in their matches and sort of comatose but eventually woke up? Feel free to ignore this if this is too much, thank you for your time~
Aww thank you so much my love<3 you’re so sweet!!! I didn’t really think that many people liked my stuff so it’s amazing to hear that they do! I try my best on these things and I hate when it takes me years to post something out.
I’m working on another fic that’s similar to this for naib so he won’t be included but I hope you’ll take Norton instead
Ithaqua, Joseph, Richard, and Norton with a fatally injured reader who finally wakes up!
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Basic background first before the good stuff<3
You were supposed be decoding, out of the way, and out of danger.
You weren’t supposed to take the hit. You weren’t supposed to be here.
It wasn’t fair when your body fell to the ground, blood splattering out underneath you into a pool of crimson liquid.
It wasn’t fair when he called out to you, and you didn’t answer, only to feel your pulse fading.
It wasn’t fair that he had to carry your limp body to Emily’s office in a panic, begging her to help.
And it wasn’t fair when she had said you might not wake up.
Ithaqua
He couldn’t sit by you the entire time you were in bed. It just reminded him of his mother.
He didn’t want to put himself through more with those terrible memories.
He’d visit you in the morning and at night.
Kissing you goodnight and kissing you good morning
Like some strange routine.
When he got the news you were awake he had dropped everything, but he didn’t run, he just had to make himself believe you were okay first.
He had to make sure this wasn’t some sick joke, and that he’d wake up in his bed only to be told you didn’t make it.
Stopping in the doorway, looking at you who seemed to be looking back at him with those surprised eyes, that beautiful smile he loved etched onto your face.
He knew after a blow like that there would be some damage, a large scar going from the side of your cheek and up to your forehead would forever be a reminder of his fuck up.
He feels terrible and sometimes it’s hard to look at you without guilt seeping in.
He doesn’t want to be like this but it’s his way of working through it.
He loves you a lot, he has dreams of marrying you and building a home far away. But now those dreams are plagued with the possibility that he’ll accidentally become the monster he tried to tell himself he wasn’t.
Joseph
Alcohol.
A lot of it.
Bottles and bottles of it by your bed side.
He refused to leave you. He couldn’t live with the fact he might of killed the only person he loved more than anything.
The only person that made this bearable. And they might be gone.
He would drink himself to sleep and he would drink the moment he opened his eyes.
Not a lot of people ever saw him cry, but now? Everyone did.
When he had a moment of soberness he’d look over and break down.
Joseph would barely shower, having to be dragged away from you and told to clean himself up, only to repeat that process.
During one of the times he was forced to bathe, he had stumbled back in, bottle in hand, only to be met with your disappointed gaze.
He knows how much you hated when drinks, and because of that barely touched liquor anymore.
“You said you’d cut back on drinking.” Your voice broke the silence.
Joseph rushed over to your side, falling onto his knees and sobbing. “Stop it. Now’s no time for lecturing. I thought I had killed you. I thought you weren’t going to make it. I thought you’d be like Claud, and leave me all alone again.”
Your hand makes its way to his cheek, “I’m okay. I’d never leave you alone, I promise. These things were bound to happen. But I’ll be more careful.”
He nodded leaning into your touch.
Richard
He’s fuming mad. And of course concerned.
He was made to do one thing, protect, and he couldn’t even save the one he loves?
“What bullshit.” He’d say through gritted teeth. Watching over your body, breathing raggedly. His hands smoothing out your hair to look nice with a not so gentle hand. He’s holding himself back.
He believes this is partially your fault. You should have been out of the way. Doing your job and letting him rescue.
But no, you had to disobey, you just couldn’t listen.
He’ll look like he doesn’t want to be there when his facade slips around the others, but he really does. He hates the fact that you have a terrible possibility over your head.
And he can’t control it.
He’d make sure you look stunning even in your condition. He’d brush your hair, and make sure you’re somewhat clean. Because when you wake up he’s going to want to kiss you, remind you of the way it should be.
When he’s informed by Emily that you’ve made a recovery, hes immediately speed walking towards your room.
He wanted to be the first thing you saw, but oh well. He’ll have you back in tip top shape soon.
“Richard!” You exclaimed, reaching your hand out to him.
He takes it, kissing the back, “___, my dear. You gave me quite the scare.”
“I know.. I shouldn’t have been so foolish but-”
His lips are against yours before you can finish. It’s passionate and deep with his feelings. You can tell how much he missed you, how worried he was.
“Foolish or not, you’re still here, with me. And that’s all that matters.” He says softly, loving yet serious eyes looking into yours.
Norton
Out of everyone, him and Joseph are the two absolute messes.
Joseph might be a bit worse with his drinking but Norton becomes violent and agitated.
He’s freaking out, shoving people out of the way with more strength than necessary just to get to you.
He wasn’t there to help, maybe, if he was you’d be okay.
The possibility’s are running through his head and causing him to become anxious and angry.
Fools gold is right there behind him. Sitting in a corner silently waiting for you to awake.
Fools golds matches are either quick surrenders or he’s chairing everyone immediately.
Norton doesn’t know how to comfort himself and doesn’t particularly want his hunter version to even touch him let alone tell him nice things so he’s just suffering until you wake up.
This man actually wouldn’t leave you, even if he was dirty because he’s been like this before. It doesn’t bother him.
He had watched you wake up, your eyes being blinded by the bright light of day.
He was silent until you noticed him,
“Norton-?” You began, but the minute you spoke he jumped on you. Holding you tightly.
“Don’t you pull this shit again. You.. don’t know how worried I was.” He mumbled into your neck.
A lot of apologies were given that day and fools gold was right behind you when Norton had to go.
He may not have liked his other self but he shared the same love for you like he did. And if playing guard dog for a bit would ensure everyone to be happy and safe, then sure.
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I fear I only like Richard’s..
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novankenn · 2 days ago
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What If...
Pyrrha was also under the sway of Salem Cinder and Pyrrha love each other (Pompeii) Jaune and Emerald are married (Topaz) Jaune and Emerald have a child (Jasmine Esmeralda Arc) Jaune and Emerald are on the run from Salem & Ozpin
Scene : A cheap motel in Argus
==> @cheeseeater2 - What if Nora and Ren find Jaune and Emerald with the kid and let them go if only for the child to be safe. Jaune says even if they hate him forever he loves them and hopes they can be happy one day.
Of all the things Ren and Nora expected after hearing that Jaune had left with Pyrrha during the fall, and then discovering that he and Emerald were on the run from Salem's agents. Finding himself held at gun-point by the man he used to consider a brother, was not one of them.
It had been a stroke of luck, finding out Jaune and Emerald were expecting. It was through idle chit-chat with the other tenants of the apartment building Jaune and Emerald had been living in for the last almost year... before vanishing days before a fire gutted the building. So as they continued their counter operations against Salem's machinations, they kept checking local medical centers and hospitals.
At a stop over in Argus, about a year after the last lead that went cold at the apartment complex. Nora had decided on a whim to check the local hospital, and much to her utter shock she caught site of Emerald leaving with a bundle cradled in her arms. So cautiously she followed the obviously new mother, tracing her back to a rather shabby motel.
A scroll call and Ren was beside her with in twenty minutes. A hint of intimidation and they had the room number. The flimsy wooden door was no obstacle for Nora. She was through it at the first hit of her shoulder. Ren was inside a fraction of a second after Nora burst through the door. The screaming of a startled child, and the yells of a young women, filled the room. But what Ren really focused on was the cold barrel of a rather nasty pistol being pressed against the center of his chest.
"You don't want to do this Jaune." Ren calmly informed his former team leader. "This will just make things worse."
"You right Ren, I don't want to do this, but to protect my wife and my daughter... I will." Jaune replied, his voice measured, and forced like he was fighting the potential of his own emotions surfacing. "Back away Nora."
"Jaune, why?" Nora asked as she stepped back away from the door she had just smashed in.
"I made a mistake." Jaune replied. "Both Em and I did."
"And what do you call this?" Ren asked nodding towards the pistol pressed against his chest.
"Protecting our second chance." Jaune replied. "Em, are you and her okay?"
"We are, she's just a little scared." Emerald answered, as she gently rocked the bundle in her arms. "Shush that's okay sweetie. It's okay, daddy will keep the bad people away from us."
"We're not... bad people." Nora countered.
"Really?" Emerald asked. "You've been trying to find us for years. Chasing us from place to place. Making us uproot, time and time again just so we can have a life away from all the bullshit."
"But..."
"We made mistakes. We were lied to. Led on." Emerald cut Nora off. "We figured it out too late to stop them, so we left."
"And have Ozpin's and Salem's minions dogging us all over Remnant." Jaune added. "We're out. We want to be left in peace. We know nothing, nor do we want to know anything. We're out."
"Jaune, you know..."
"Who says it can't be that way? Ozpin? Salem?" Jaune countered. "Fuck them and their little war!"
"Jaune, language!' Emerald hissed as she continued to placate the fussy infant.
"I'm sorry, but the point remains. We're out. We just want to make a life, for us and our daughter. A quiet life." Jaune expanded upon his original statement. "Both of you away from the door."
"Jaune, this isn't the right way. Come back with us? Ozpin can..."
"Ozpin is a failure." Jaune rebutted. "If he had any brains or sense he would have at least had an idea that Salem was trying something after the breach."
"None of us..."
"No, we didn't." Jaune agreed, "But we we're students, why would we have? The ones in power should have been protecting us. Like I will Em and Jas."
"Jas?" Nora asked as she moved as far from the door, as she could without getting any closer to Emerald or the infant. "Is that her name? Jas?"
"Jasmine Esmeralda Arc." Emerald informed the group. "She's named after our mothers."
Jasmine started to fuss more.
"Is she..."
"She's hungry." Emerald answered as she adjusted how she was holding Jasmine while lifting the left side of her shirt to feed her bundle of joy.
"I'm sorry it came to this." Jaune commented as he moved himself to be standing between Emerald and the now sitting Nora and Ren, his pistol still trained on Ren. "I never wanted to hurt you, either of you. You mean too much to me, but..."
"Jasmine and Emerald mean more." Nora finished his statement. "I can understand that."
"Are you truly happy Jaune?" Ren asked, keeping his hands flat on his lap, in clear view. "I mean really happy?"
"I am." Jaune replied. "I... we made our mistakes, but Jas is the best of both of us, and she deserves a future."
"A future you're willing to kill to protect?" Ren asked.
"You need to understand, Ren. I don't want to, but I will. To protect Em and Jas, I will put down anyone that comes after us."
"What are you going to do now?" Nora asked, trying to lean just enough to see Emerald and her baby.
"Same as we always do when you two or Cinder and Pyrrha get too close. We'll leave, and find somewhere new."
"That's not much of a life." Ren commented. "Always on the run. Is that fair to Jasmine? To Emerald? To you?"
"If I could change it. If I could fix it, I would... but there's fat chance of that happening, isn't there."
"Can I... can I hold her?" Nora tentatively asked. "I won't do anything, I swear, I just... I just feel this need..."
"I don't..."
"It's okay Jaune." Emerald cut him off. "I trust her enough not to hurt Jas. She's not the type."
Emerald stood, up after burping Jasmine, and slowly approached, keeping out of Jaune's line of fire. She loved him, wholly, and she understood is consuming drive and need to keep her and their daughter safe. She had the same compulsion.
"Watch her head." Emerald softly instructed Nora as she lay the precious bundle of joy. Jaune and her little miracle into Nora's arms.
"She's so small." Nora whispered, a sad smile on her face. "She's so small."
"Jaune, put it away." Emerald smiled at him as she crouched next to Nora who was completely enamored with little Jasmine.
Jaune hesitated for a fraction of a moment and then reached up and pushed the pistol back up into his sleeve. Ren heard the click of the mechanism resetting.
"Ren," Nora softly spoke. "We can't keep chasing them. We need to help them."
"Nora?"
"She's so small, and innocent. She shouldn't have to suffer for Jaune and Emerald's mistakes." Nora commented her eyes never leaving the beautiful if but slightly chubby face. "This is a fresh start for them... and us."
"Us?" Ren asked.
"I hate what Pyrrha did. How she used us all. How she broke our trust... but I want to help protect this little one. I want to do that more than chasing Jaune or Emerald." Nora made a kissy face as Emerald smiled. "Everything we're doing is about the future right? Protecting it?"
"I guess." Ren responded.
"Then let's help them. Let's let this little one have the family the Grimm robbed us of..." Nora's eyes started to tear up, emotions she thought long gone washing over her.
"It's okay, Nora." Emerald comforted her one time enemy. "It's okay."
"There might be a way." Ren sighed as he spoke. "Because to be honest I'm tired of chasing you Jaune."
"If it's any consolation, we're tired of being chased by you." Jaune gave his former teammate a soft smile.
"Would you stay in Vale, if we could get you in without anyone knowing? If we could help you get settled? Would you stay?"
Jaune looked to Emerald who was still hovering over Nora, rubbing her back in gentle circles as Nora tried to get control of her emotions. Emerald gave Jaune a smile and a nod.
"I would, if we can be safe. Unmolested?"
"Only Nora and I would know. Not even Ozpin will be any the wiser."
"Tell me why?" Jaune point blank asked.
"I want my family back together, despite the mistakes we've all made." Ren replied. "You're our family Jaune, and we miss you."
"I miss you as well." Jaune responded.
"So, can you really help us? Keep us secret and safe?" Emerald asked as Nora, at Emerald's urging, transferred Jasmine back into her arms.
"We can." Ren replied.
"No," Nora spoke her voice breaking slightly. "We will."
Jaune swallowed hard, and moved forward, his arms spread accepting Nora and Ren into a hug that had been forever in the making. A familial embrace they had all missed.
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pseudowho · 1 day ago
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Good god, I thought I was the only one that would literally roll my eyes and exit the page at child like descriptions of genitalia in fanfic. Do you have any insight as to why that has become a thing?
Side note: You absolutely rock in a cool older sister way
Warning! Please do feel free to block me if this is not to your liking. Personal theories and opinions ahead that may well make you hate me!
I have quite a lot of theories, but! all of them are theories, interspersed with my personal opinions, and none of them are pleasant. Here they are...
The trend of hyperfetishisation of, and normalisation of sexualising extreme youth/barely legal young women, has possibly created a push towards extra young 'women' being viewed pornographically. Those who are young in our communities may often therefore feel their burgeoning sexuality is validated, and seek to reflect images of extreme youth in their depictions of pornography (smut).
The rise of labiaplasty; once more, teaching young women that their perfectly normal bodies are disgusting has paid off. I can say with firsthand experience that the amount of women paying money for surgery to make their genitalia as 'barely there' as possible (almost like a child's) is climbing.
The trend towards hypermasculinity, and traditional male!dom, female!sub roles in the heterosexual community where historically the man has been significantly older, and this was considered normal. This has created a push towards 'daddy' culture (in an older man, and much younger girl/woman, way). This will ultimately increase the push for women and girls to be portrayed as younger in porn/smut.
Women's bodies have, throughout the ages, been expected to fall into fashion trends, as if we are clothes to be worn by men. Pin-up girls were expected to have a certain shape (the in fashion shape!) to cater to men. Noughties 'cocaine/heroin chic' builds were typically the ones that would be seen on the arms of the most famous men.
And now? The hyperfetishisation of youth is back. So our society is now creating a progressive push towards extra young women being pushed to the foreground as aspirational partners.
What's even filthier about this, is it has allowed more and more people to feel ethically validated in 'blurring the line' between girls and women, and it appeals to young girls and young women, at the time in their lives when they're often most likely to seek validation.
Society is taking advantage of young women and girls wanting to be wanted, by telling them that it's okay for a barely legal girl to be pursued by a much older man.
In short: I worry about what I feel is a concerning rise in the push towards extremely young women being the 'partner of choice'. There seems to be a patriarchal push back towards women remaining less powerful in more submissive societal roles and in partnerships with men, and it's being packaged as 'womens' choice'.
I'm not saying that young women and girls being able to explore their sexuality is wrong; not at all. I fully support it. I just always ask the question: who is leading this, and why, and who is in control here?
Not all men are as feminist as we write them on Tumblr. Not all men are how we write Nanami Kento. As well most of us know. Which is why we're here...writing men who will be dominant/take care of us while respecting us fully. Because deep down, a lot of us feel that this man is a fantasy.
Older women aren't bitter than men our own age often want younger women; we're suspicious of their reasons for it. Is it because she's less self confident? That you perceive her as easier to mould? That she's less likely to see all of your red flags? Hmm.
Love,
-- Haitch xxx
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Symbolism of Jinx's Hair
*Arcane spoilers*
CW: Violence, self-harm, suicide
OH. MY. GOD. So so so many thoughts, but for now a few quick thoughts on the symbolism of Jinx's hair.
-The bangs are there the whole time and represent her relationship with Silco since we see young Silco with similar bangs. (credit to Tik Tok for that).
-After Isha's death, Jinx's very long hair is completely undone from its braid. This calls to mind Rapunzel, perhaps symbolizing that in her depression Jinx is isolated in the tower of her mind and - maybe - needs someone to rescue her but it's difficult to reach her unless she tosses her hair down and lets someone in. Problem is, Jinx doesn't feel worthy of letting anyone in. Silco, while well-meaning, is reminiscent of Mother Gothel, who keeps Rapunzel trapped by teaching her to act a certain way. The hair is unbraided, which symbolizes the loss of her identity as Jinx. Her inability to form and be comfortable in a distinct identity not explicitly attached to another person leads to a lack of self-worth that causes her death.
-THEN she cuts her hair to the length it happens to be when she's powder in the other timeline. This symbolizes a reversion to - not necessarily her old self (too much has happened) - but to someone closer to who she would have been without so much trauma. This is the point when she's about to *you know* and Ekko manages to stop her. The sad thing about Jinx in the current timeline is that her identity has become irreparably tied to other people because of her trauma so she doesn't think she has any value on her own. First she (and her identity as a younger sister / daughter) was linked to Vi and Vander, then attached to Silco (as a daughter). When she loses Silco, she loses her identity, until she once more finds an identity in being a sister / attaching to Isha. She thinks she has value by playing that role. When she loses that, she once more loses her sense of identity and worth because she's never been allowed to grow up / form one on her own because of her trauma. That's why her "sacrifice" in the end is such a tragedy and not actually something to be admired.  It all stems from her lack of valuing herself, which is a tragedy. The Powder in the other timeline is different because she's had time to form an independent identity and sense of self-worth which we can see demonstrated by her clothes and the fact that she's not very susceptible to the slight pressure from Vander and others to be more ambitious and live up to her potential. The ONLY thing that makes her help Ekko is the fact that Vi is alive in the other timeline. She expresses her love in her own way by creating something contrasted to how Jinx expresses her love for Vi by destroying herself. Also, Ekko is the only one who can reach her in that moment and stop her self-destruction because he sees her soul - the real Powder. It's like the difference between friends and family. We love our families. They are (good or bad) important. But they have preconceived notions about us and our identities related to them. Our friends, on the other hand, CHOOSE us. They choose to be around us (ideally) because they like us for who we are in our natural state.
-When she zooms up with Ekko, her hair has been changed yet again. She keeps the bangs (representing Silco) and has dyed a streak purple (to represent her and Vi together - pink + blue and also VIOLET). The rest, however, is jaggedly cut off close to her head. Instead of this representing an entirely new identity, I see it as representing the hope and POSSIBILITY of a new, more authentic identity growing (see hair growing) while still keeping the foundation of her care for the people she loves. The hair is cut jaggedly and isn't necessarily beautiful or put together by typical standards, but it doesn't have to be. One of the main themes of this season is that "brokenness" is essential to who we are and isn't always a bad thing. As Ekko says, it's a chance to build something new. Unfortunately that never happens because of the consequences of trauma.
I'm not sure I agree with Jinx's death because on the surface it feels like the tired trope of villain / morally grey character is redeemed by sacrificing themselves for someone else. Personally, I think it's much more powerful to have a character take responsibility for themselves while also forgiving themselves. I concede that this was done in a really nuanced way. The thing is, I don't think we're actually supposed to read Jinx's death as a heroic act that redeems her. Instead, it is more in line with the themes to read it as a horrific suicide caused by trauma, oppression, and a lack of self-worth/identity. In that split-second decision, Jinx reverts to all that she knows and has been taught, even though for a moment she did have a shot at a new identity. She chooses to die because she doesn't value herself / doesn't know who she is and has been taught all her life that you show love through violence (even if it's violence in protection of those you love). With as clever and innovative as Jinx is, don't tell me she and Vi couldn't have figured out another way to best Vander. It makes sense to read this moment as an avoidable, tragic suicide because Jinx is clearly suicidal and even makes an attempt. The song that plays during her attempt also plays during her death. We're supposed to see this event more in the light of what happened to Isha, which HEAVILY foreshadowed and paralleled Jinx's death by showing a child's misguided attempt at expressing love. An innocent child shouldn't feel obligated to sacrifice their life to save someone else's life. That moment is horrific. Not even an adult should be asked to do that. That's an unmistakable tragedy. Just like Isha was doing what she was taught (the simplicity and complexity of "pew-pew"), Jinx was doing what she was taught. It's a cycle of innocence, violence, and trauma that also mirrors Jinx's accidental role in Vander's death when she was trying to mold herself to what everyone expected her to be. It's haunting that Jinx says, "Killing isn't mercy." She doesn't give herself mercy in the end. We see that even though Vi tries her hardest to show Jinx she's loved and can have mercy/ a second chance, Jinx doesn't know how to accept that. It's not a coincidence that in that same conversation with ghost Silco they talk about identity. That's just my personal interpretation.
Anyway.
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Euphemia and James - Writer's Notes
Earlier this year I wrote a fic titled "Euphemia and James," a story exploring Euphemia Potter and infertility. This is the most deeply personal story I've ever written, and it took a few weeks to write it because of the emotions it stirred up for me, but honestly, being able to write this took years of processing emotions. I decided to share some of my notes on this fic in this post, and it includes this lovely cover image from @livelaughlovetoread. This story is also unique in that it's written in second person POV. It wasn't intended to come out that way, but that's how it came out. See below the image for my notes:
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Euphemia and James came from these lines from the extra-canonical writings on Pottermore/whatever they call it these days:
"[Fleamont] sold the company at a vast profit when he retired, but no amount of riches could compensate him or his wife Euphemia for their childlessness. They had quite given up hope of a son or daughter when, to their shock and surprise, Euphemia found that she was pregnant and their beloved boy, James, was born."
If you don't know anything about infertility, I envy you somewhat. Studies have shown that a diagnosis or experience of infertility is similar to receiving a cancer diagnosis or losing a close loved one. It took me a while to realize that a lot of the feelings I had surrounding infertility was actually grief and mourning.
So, I put it all into this fic. There are a few points I want to highlight, if you decide to read the fic or want to see some lines, and my feelings around it all:
"When you meet Fleamont Potter a year into your job at the apothecary, you have no intention of marrying him."
I more or less shamelessly wrote Euphemia and Fleamont's relationship to be similar to mine with Mr C. In fact, Mr C aka @rawr-gorg-smash read this work and we were both sobbing messes by the end of it.
"It will happen when it happens, they say. It will come when you least expect it, they say. That’s what everyone says, and you’re ready to punch the next person in the face who tells you to just “relax.”"
Infertile people will get advice like this frequently. It's meant to be helpful or sometimes soothing, I think, but all too often it's an empty hope. Sometimes, bodies just don't work right, no matter how much relaxing you do.
"It’s not polite to ask. Everyone knows where magical, adopted children come from. They are Muggleborn children who are delicately extracted from their birth homes and replaced with Squibs, or sometimes not replaced at all."
This part is world building by me - the idea of adoption in a magical world seemed odd to me. How would infertile magical couples adopt if they can't use potions or charms? I wouldn't put it past them to just take a Muggleborn child, modify memories, and go. I won't touch on real world adoption-there's a lot to unpack there-but this idea gave me some thoughts on magical adoption.
"It seems selfish to want more, when you already have so much. You question, for the first time in your life, if you really want a child."
I have heard people say things to this effect: it's so selfish to want your 'own' children or to want children and bring them into this world, or some variation of that. If this is what you believe, you and I are going to disagree and I'm not going to try to convince you otherwise. But it's something I and many other infertile people have considered. The thing is, people have had children and will continue to have children throughout terrible periods of time. Does it make sense? Not necessarily. Human actions don't always make sense. To me, though, it speaks of hope. Hope for a better tomorrow, for a world that we will build that will be better for the next generation.
"Now you wish for a living child. There are no longer any expectations on your baby or the kind of person they’ll be. You want a living, breathing baby in your arms you can dote on, educate, feed, and guide through life."
I'll say that one of the few silver linings of infertility for me has been re-grounding my expectations of what kind of child I might have. It once was wishing for a boy or girl, or a kid who likes to read, or a kid who won't be into extreme sports, but now it's just a kid I want. I want to love them because they exist. That's all.
"It’s a shame that you only got nineteen years with your son, the one you wished had been born twenty years prior, so you could treasure twice as long with him."
One of my fears for having children later in life is not having enough time with them. Then again, young parents die. Even children die. If nothing else, whatever time I do have, I hope I use it to love whatever family I have to the fullest.
That's all I have for now. If you made it this far, read the fic, commented on it, left kudos, or a bookmark, thank you very kindly for your time. Of all the things I've written, this felt most like putting a piece of my heart into the world.
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tigerincahoots · 3 days ago
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HE KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING. The little display of his naked form past the building steam so that it would be the first thing Henry would see the moment he walked into the bathroom. Was this a good idea? Sleeping with his partner? Probably not but Kevin wasn’t really thinking about said consequences at all. Or he wasn’t thinking RATIONALLY. How was he supposed to focus on his job – to track, find and murder the werewolf responsible for those murders – when his fucking partner looked so damn attractive that even his head would occasionally spin out of its axis? Henry had that innocent look. That do-gooder vibe would make him roll his eyes more often than usual. To be perfectly honest, that sort of personality trait was one that the shifter tended to avoid. People who wanted to do good and help others, people who would put themselves in the line of fire for an innocent…. They never lived long to tell the tale. Maybe that was what would happen to Henry at some point.
A THOUGHT THAT SOMEHOW MADE KEVIN FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE.
LUCKILY, he didn’t need to be alone with his thoughts much longer. As the bathroom door opened and Henry stepped inside – his gaze was fully on the detective and nothing else in the world seemed to matter. Henry wanted him. He wanted Henry. Consequences be damned. They would deal with them at a later date and that was definitely not happening now. “You told me to START without you.” A cheeky grin dances on his lips as Kevin proceeds with his one-man show. Stroking every inch of his manhood as keeping a nearly predatory gaze on Henry. Give him something to crave. Something to look forward to. He wasn’t even going to pretend to be coy – he saw someone he wanted and he would claim that someone for himself. Playing safe was for losers and people with low self-esteem. Not him.
HIS EYES DON’T ABANDON HENRY. He watches with interest and curiosity as the other man undresses. Each part of his body revealed earns a smirk from the shifter –who loves how good-looking Henry is underneath all of his clothes. He already suspected the other man to be fit – he had to as a detective – but the reality was far more enticing than anything that his mind had come up with. And the fact that Henry was every bit as hung as he had imagined? A fucking BONUS. Perfection all around and all he had done so far was undress. If this were to continue past this night – Kevin would definitely want to see Henry lose his clothes like that more often in the future. It was almost a crime by itself to have that physique covered by clothes.
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”HEY THERE.” There wasn’t much room for two in the shower but that was exactly the point. The distance between their bodies was null – both of them invading the other’s personal space in the most sensual and wanted of ways. The slightest movement would make their skin touch – slippery touches under the hot stream of water as they both took their time to fully admire the other. Hands on his chest – lips on his neck – a shiver rolling down his spine the moment their cocks brushed against one another in such a confined space. It was tantalizing. And it was forcing Kevin to hold himself back – to give his partner the necessary time to explore, to touch and to admire – when all he wanted was to DEVOUR him where he stood.
A GROWL ROLLED FROM HIS LIPS. Not a mere sound but a primal growl laced with lust as Henry’s fingers found his cock. A gentle yet possessive grip – making him throb against the detective’s hand as Kevin closed his eyes for a fraction of a second. That felt good. That felt very, very good. “Soap can wait.” Their lips meet. A ferocious and possessive kiss as Kevin cups Henry’s face with both of his hands – seeking to kiss the Detective until their lungs would force them to pull apart due to the lack of oxygen. Due to the limited space, it was easy to pin Henry against the wall. To used his own body weight to keep the detective grounded while the slightest movement of their slippery bodies urged Kevin to playfully thrust against the other man. “I’m going to cut to the chase here.” The tips of their noses brushed after Kevin pulled back from the kiss. One hand remained on Henry’s face – caressing his cheek, his jawbone, thumb gently brushing over the detective’s bottom lip… “I want to fuck you. All night long if you think you can ENDURE it.”
Kevin sure loved to fondle him, and Henry loved it right back. It had been a long time since he'd felt the warm, strong hands of a man on his body. And what a man! Kevin was gruff and surly most of the time, but he was also passionate, somehow needy, and offered a sense of stability. There was no room for error or confusion, he made it clear what he wanted, and what he wanted right now was Henry. The feeling was very much mutual.
Work was not on Henry's mind. Perhaps later he would think about what complications could arise since they worked together, but now wasn't the time. With those hands on his ass, how could he even think of anything else?
"Now who's telling who what to do?" Henry smiled, Max was tangling around his feet now, so he had to feed him. "I won't take long, I pinky promise." He gave Kevin another quick kiss, as he was quickly growing addicted to kissing him, and let him saunter off the the bathroom upstairs.
Once Henry cracked open a can of food for Max, he flopped it into his bowl with a plop. "You're a good guy." Henry chuckled, and gave Max and pat on his large head. Then he all but raced up the stairs, taking them two at a time.
He heard the water going full blast and walked into the bathroom. "Oh," His eyebrows raised, "You're starting that without me?" His eyes were glued to his partner, finally seeing him naked after thinking about it all night. Henry's cock twitched, he was already aroused from being felt up, but now he was aching with want. "You're beautiful."
Henry kept his eyes on Kevin as he undressed as well, letting his clothes go wherever on the bathroom floor. Henry was both lean and built at the same time. His broad shoulders were always obvious, but not the body he was hiding underneath his clothes. He was muscled, skin like ivory, and fully smooth. His thighs were thick, and his cock hung heavily between them even when he was hard.
He stepped forward and pulled the shower door over slowly. "Wow," He spoke softly, his eyes going up and down the length of his partner's body. He was so gorgeous. Henry stepped inside and felt the hot spray of the water on his skin, it felt wonderful, everything about this felt wonderful.
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"Looks like you kept warm for me." He pressed against Kevin's slick body and kissed him as his hands roamed over his chest. Their hard lengths touched, and Henry once again twitched. "Fuck."
There was barely enough room for two men, but that made things even better. He could slide against Kevin's body, it was impossible not to be so close to him. He was letting his hands and arms do what they wanted, groping and wrapping around his partner as he kissed his neck and collarbone.
"Do you want some help with this? Or are you gonna play with it by yourself?" His hand smoothed down Kevin's torso and wrapped around his hard cock, stroking him slowly, getting a feel for him, memorizing his shape.
"I think we need soap."
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kagoutiss · 8 months ago
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pelican town, ‘72
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rocicrew · 2 years ago
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The Expanse (2015-2022)
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