#lucky my meds arrived yesterday | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ahonice · 1 year ago

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lucky; pt.2

part one

luke hughes x fem reader

word count: 8.4k

warnings: cursing, drinking, implications of sex/sexual jokes & situations, slight hate towards business majors, probably definitely incorrect knowledge about pre med shit.

note: since so many people asked for a part two (literally only fifteen but still) i finally got over the grudge i have against series/part twos and i'm here to relieve you all. this is the opposite of planned out, i am writing this as i go along so i hope it doesn’t suck too badly (actually scared no one will like this because of how much love part one got). anyways enjoy, leave feedback, have a great day, love y’all babes <3

italics are flashbacks

+++

you and luke didn’t arrive back at the house until past midnight. neither of you expected anyone to be awake when you entered through the front door, but the sound of multiple voices proved that theory to be wrong.

“i think my brother’s friends got here a little earlier than we anticipated.” luke told you as he opened the door, going unnoticed by the small crowd in the living room. “let’s just get to my room and go to sleep, we need some rest.” you nodded at luke’s words as he moved himself behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist, you knew he was subconsciously attempting to protect you from the group of guys, more specifically his brothers.

we didn’t make it far though, only a few moments later a voice called out at luke, causing everyone else to focus their attention on us. sighing, luke let go of you and moved forward to greet everybody, muttering an apology as he passed by you.

you stood there awkwardly, trying to decide if you should wait for luke to finish with his tiny game of catch up or if you should just go up into his room and wait for him there. after what happened today luke asked his mother if the two of you could stay in the same room today, she agreed after a little bit of begging on luke’s behalf. before you could make your own decision the room’s attention was no longer on luke.

“who is the girl luke?”

your head shot up at the mention of you, instantly becoming a bit self conscious because of the number of eyes on you. you made eye contact with quinn for a split second before tears started to build up again, seeing him just reminded you of everything that you had been through in the past twenty four hours.

“that’s my girlfriend, y/n.” luke said, making his way back to your side and attempting to block you from the eyes that were visibly making you uncomfortable. “-and if you don’t mind we would like to get to bed, it’s been a long day. you can all be properly introduced in the morning.” without letting anybody else get a word in, he turned around and guided you up to his room with his hands around your waist.

+++

you woke relatively early, the sun was just beginning to rise so you took this as your opportunity to go outside and spend some time on your own, you needed it. it took a little bit to get luke’s death grip on you loose enough for you to wiggle out of bed, but after you were successfully free you grabbed one of his hoodies to throw on over your pjs and pulled your hair out of your face with a claw clip.

you silently made your way out of the house and took a seat out on the dock, taking a quick picture of the view as the sky turned shades of pink and orange. you dipped your feet into the water before grabbing your journal, deciding it was best to write your feelings down on paper just for your better understanding of everything that has happened.

as you finished up your journal entry you noticed the sun was now peaking over the tree line, you took a picture of the view, as well as a picture of your legs with your feet in the water and the pink journal in your lap. you opened up instagram and put all the pictures you took this morning and posted them to your private instagram account, captioning it “yesterday was one of the worst days of my life, can only hope today and each day after will be better.”

you spent a few more minutes in silence, enjoying the fresh air you were getting. your trance was broken by the sound of footsteps on the dock.

“hey dear, what are you doing up so early?” you turned around to look at the man speaking.

“hi jim.” you smiled as he sat down next to you. “i’m just spending some time outside. i felt like i needed some fresh air.”

jim nodded before speaking, “i’m sorry about everything. i had no idea any of this was going on, and i am sorry that i didn’t pick up on it earlier.”

“it’s okay, don’t feel bad for not noticing it earlier. i should’ve spoken up when it first started happening.” you told him, giving him a reassuring smile.

“would you like to join me and ellen today? we’re just running some errands but it could be fun, help you escape the sausage party that has become the lake house.” jim offered, causing you to laugh at his use of the phrase “sausage party”.

“yeah i would love to.”

+++

you had gotten ready for the day without waking up your boyfriend, so you decided to continue to let him sleep. you went to your room and began packing your bags because you would be leaving in two days and you needed to begin getting ready for your departure back home. once the room was all sorted and looked like nobody was staying in it, you put your luggage back into the closet and made your way downstairs, cleaning had always been a way for you to relieve stress.

“sorry to keep you guys waiting, i wanted to clean up my room.” you told ellen and jim as you made your way downstairs.

“no need for apologies sweetie, let’s go. our first stop is breakfast.”

+++

you had gone to breakfast with luke’s parents and told them about your plans for after college.

“right now i’m planning on becoming a medical examiner.” you explained as you waited for your orders. “i just have to see if i made it into the pre-med program before i can begin properly planning my future.” ellen and jim nodded, and continued to ask some questions about how your first year of university was going and other school related topics.

+++

after breakfast they took you to the local farmers/flea market, you were excited as you had been meaning to ask luke to come along with you. as you were browsing your options you saw a couple booths near each other with fabric for sale, you quickly made your way over and began looking at what was all there. after a few moments you found the colors you were looking for.

you purchased your rolls of cloth as well as some embroidery floss in an assortment of colors because you had been meaning to stock up on it and some yarn for one of your experiments. after getting everything you made your way back towards ellen and jim, telling them what you got.

the next stop was the grocery store, with jack’s friends arriving early the house wasn’t stocked up for everybody staying over. during your morning with luke’s parents the topic of what happened the day before didn’t come up until your last stop of the day.

you were looking around a local garden shop, looking for a new plant to bring home, when ellen came up to you.

“i just want to apologize again for what happened yesterday. i am beyond embarrassed for how my sons have been treating you. you mean a lot to me, jim, and luke, and after the talk i had with them yesterday i’m hoping jack and quinn will come around as well.” you smiled at ellen, a couple tears were brought to surface when she said that you meant a lot to her.

once you and luke were gone ellen walked up to her oldest sons and they immediately knew what was coming.

“mom, please don’t-”

“no quinn! i am going to.” she sighed, “y/n means so much to luke, and for you guys to be so rude and disrespectful towards her is unacceptable. has she ever done anything to make you guys feel that way? or were these assumptions completely based on snap judgements?” ellen took her son’s silence as an answer. “y/n is good for luke, i’ve never seen him happier. he loves her enough to introduce us and allow us to spend time with her, and this is how you pay him back? you two need to figure out a way to fix this, i suggest you start with opening up the presents that y/n spent hours making for you two that you guys never had the common decency to be appreciative about, i think you’ll like what they are.” after giving them one more look of disappointment she walked back into the house to find jim and explain to him what was going on.

“i think they want to open up the gifts you made, but i never got to properly ask because their friends showed up.” you smiled at her. them opening up the gifts wasn’t going to fix everything, ellen knew this, but it was a start.

+++

it was only eleven when you returned back to the lake house, with how late everybody stayed up last night you didn’t expect anyone to awake yet, you were wrong. ellen and jim had some more places to go but didn’t want to take up your whole day so they dropped you back off at the house before continuing their list of things to do. when you got up to the front porch you heard the voices of multiple people, one being your boyfriend, and they were all yelling.

“this is all your guys’ fault! my girlfriend left because of you two and how you’ve been treating her.” you heard luke shout. you quickly realized you never informed luke of your last minute plans with his parents, you kind of expected ellen to send a message to him or to any of the boys to explain her and jim’s absence when they woke up.

“luke calm the fuck down. her car is still out front, she obviously didn’t leave.” jack’s voice was heard as you tried to open the front door, of course it was fucking locked.

“her luggage is gone, her room is spotless, it looks like nobody has stayed in it for weeks.” luke voice was breaking. you quickly knocked, more pounded, on the door needing someone to let you in. shortly after your began hitting the door it was opened, you didn’t recognize who it was so you knew it had to be one of quinn or jack’s guests.

“found her.”

you pushed past him and made your way to the living room where everyone was at, dropping your bags and wrapping luke into a hug. he noticeably relaxed under your touch, he grabbed onto you like his life depended on it and you heard muffled sobs against your neck where his face was buried into.

“i thought you left me.” he said, you were the only one that heard it he was that quiet.

“i’m so sorry luke, i–” you were going to explain what happened but you were cut off before you could continue.

“where the hell did you go?” you weren’t expecting that question, especially from who it came from. jack looked at you, anticipating your answer. you stood shocked, the genuine worry in his tone was enough to throw you off balance and leave you unable to speak. your silence seemed to just agitate him. “luke was worried sick. i get that you’re upset with me and with quinn, i do, we have been treating you horribly, but pulling this shit, causing us all to worry for you and your safety, just to get back at us is not okay.”

you felt bad, until he said that. “jack i didn’t run away as a form of revenge, i didn’t even run away, i went out with your parents. they thought i could use a break from everything going on here, and they were right.” you detached yourself from luke, your heart cracking a little bit when he whimpered at the loss of touch, and went to grab your bags from earlier. once they were in your hands again you walked up the stairs, grabbing Luke's wrist in the process. “i don’t owe either of you assholes any further explanations.”

+++

“i thought you left me because of how my brothers were treating you.” once you and luke made it into his room he broke down again, causing the guilt in you to bubble up.

“i’m so sorry baby, i would never leave you. your dad invited me to spend the morning with him and your mom and i thought it would be good to spend some time away from the house.” you said, rubbing his back as you sat in his lap, chest to chest.

after a few more minutes and a couple more apologies luke stopped crying, his sadness replaced with a slight amount of anger.

“don’t you ever do that again. i am your boyfriend, you are my guest in this house, i don’t want this to come off as insanely possessive, but i have a right to know where you are.” you could only nod at his words.

“i’m sorry luke, it didn’t even cross my mind. i wrongly assumed your mom would tell you, or that you would still be sleeping by the time i got back.”

“hey i’m not that lazy.” his joking nature allowed you to further calm down, you both got what you needed to off our chests.

“i can’t believe i called your brothers assholes.” you groaned, knowing that would probably make them dislike you even more.

“they deserved it.” luke said, giving you a kiss right after. “anyways, it was hot.”

“oh really?” you giggled, a blush forming on your cheeks as his hands began wandering.

“it’s a good thing i locked the door when we walked in.”

+++

it wasn’t for a couple more hours that you and luke went back downstairs, he thought it was time that you were actually introduced to the guests that joined you at the house.

“y/n this is trevor, cole, and alex, guys this is my girlfriend. y/n.” you smiled at them and said a faint hello, they all smiled back except for one. it was the one who asked luke who i was last night and opened the door for me earlier, the one who was now identified as trevor. he quickly went up to me and hugged me, taking me by surprise, i hesitantly brought my arms around him and gave him a slight pat on the back.

“it’s nice to finally meet you, i’ve heard many different things about you but i can already tell most of them were full of shit.” you smiled, knowing exactly what he was referring to. “well we were all planning on going out on the lake for a bit, eat dinner, watch the sunset, you two in?” you and luke both nodded before heading back upstairs to get ready.

+++

the tension on the boat was very evident, you felt bad for the three boys who probably had no idea what had happened just a day before, you’d probably feel even worse if they did know.

luke was quick to gain your attention, talking to you about the most random things. you kept up with his conversation before you noticed that jack and his friends were huddled up and whispering on the other side of the boat, you wouldn’t have been bothered if it weren’t for them constantly looking up at you before going back to their gossip session. you began to feel a little self conscious, you made an effort to cover yourself as much as you could with the one towel you could find near you. luke noticed the shift in your focus.

“is everything okay? you seem distracted, i’m sorry if you didn’t want to be near them so soon.”

“no luke it’s fine, i just feel like they’re talking about me.” you tried to subtly motion towards jack and his friends. luke just glared at them, seeing what you were seeing.

“here come sit on my lap, i’ll wrap my arms around you and protect you from them.” you giggled at his joking tone.

“anything to touch me huh hughes?” you poked at him once you were in his lap.

+++

dinner was served, an assortment of caprisuns and beers as well as uncrustables were on the menu for tonight. you moved up to grab some for you and luke when you got into a conversation with cole.

“so how long have you and luke been together?”

“ten months, our one year is in september.” you smiled, already excited for whatever the two of you would have planned for that night.

soon you were whisked away into a conversation, more like interrogation, about your relationship. trevor and cole sat next to you while jack, alex, and quinn sat in front of you. the oldest hughes put your boyfriend on wheel duty so he was on the other side of the boat, shooting you a worried glance each time you made eye contact with him.

“how did you meet?”

“we were in the same orientation group, we got paired together for this water balloon game.” you smiled at the memory, remembering how horrible luke was at simply catching the balloon.

“what are you studying?” quinn’s question caught you off guard, seemingly since for the past ten minutes all you’ve been asked about was his brother.

“i’m currently hoping to go pre-med, i will find out if i made it into the program in the next couple days hopefully.” you told him with a smile.

“so you wanna be a nurse or something?” trevor asked.

“no. if i wanted to be a nurse i would be in the nursing program.” you told him, taking a sip of the beer you were holding before continuing. “i’m planning on being a medical examiner, conducting autopsies, figuring out the time and cause of death of a person.” you could tell the topic of dead bodies made your small q/a crowd uncomfortable which caused you to giggle. “any more questions? or can i return to my boyfriend now?” the boys just shook their heads in response, so you got up and sat on luke’s lap.

“so how did that go? you don’t seem too tense anymore.” luke asked once you were both situated.

“it went decent, i think, they just asked about us the whole time.” he nodded at your answer. “-oh, but quinn did ask me a question about myself and just myself, nothing that had to do with you.” luke looked over at his oldest brother with a small smile, who returned it before you, unknowingly, interrupted the moment by asking luke to take some pictures of you.

+++

you spent the night in luke’s room again, the boys needed a room to stay in anyways, so you had convinced ellen and jim that staying with luke for two nights wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

“i don’t want you to leave.” luke said quietly, stealing your attention away from the tv screen.

“i don’t want to leave.” you replied, shifting to face him.

“then don’t. i can guarantee my parents wouldn’t have any problems with you staying for another week or two.”

“luke i can’t, my sewing machine and all my other clothing stuff is back at my house and i’ve honestly gone a little insane just going five days without it–” luke rolled his eyes at your reasoning, giving you a look of disbelief.

“seriously, a machine is the reason you don’t wanna spend more time with your boyfriend?”

“-also i get my pre-med acceptance letter soon, if i get in, and i want to be with my parent’s when that happens and i know that they’re gonna want to celebrate with a party.”

“i think if you want to get closer to my brothers, or at least have them get to know you, you should stay here an extra week or two. they mean just as much to me as you do and i’m not saying you need to be best friends with them, but it would be nice if you guys got to know each other more and spend more time together.”

silence, and eventually sleep, consumed the two of you. both knowing an argument would only start if you continued to talk about it.

+++

you woke up in an empty bed, frowning you got up and looked around the room to see if he was at least still in his bedroom, he wasn’t. you got up and began getting ready, throwing a pink bikini and some jean shorts before braiding your hair.

once you were downstairs your boyfriend was still nowhere to be found, you made your way outside where you saw his brothers and friends, luke was not with them.

“hey guys, do you know where luke is?” you asked the group, hoping one of them had an answer for you.

“he left like two hours ago, didn’t mention where he was going though.” jack answered, you nodded. “if you would like to join us, we were planning on going wakesurfing today, i don’t want you getting bored in the house by yourself.” you smiled at his offer and accepted, telling the group to give you a few minutes so you could grab some things for the boat, sending luke a text on your way back into the house.

to: luke <3

hey, where are you?

to: luke <3

i’m going on the boat with your brothers and friends so wish me luck lol

you packed your bag and joined the boys outside who were already on the boat waiting for you.

+++

an hour later you still hadn’t received a response from luke and you were getting worried.

to: luke <3

are you okay?

to: luke <3

i find it funny that yesterday when i did this exact thing you said you had a right to know where i was at all times, do i not have that right either?

“y/n do you wanna try it?” my attention was drawn away from my phone to look at cole.

“sure, i don’t know what i’m doing though.” you replied, moving to take off your shorts and put on the life vest.

“didn’t do it before we got here?” alex asked.

“no, i had other things distracting me.” i glanced over at quinn who gave me an embarrassed smile before speaking.

“i’m sorry for that, i really am, it was uncalled for.” you just nodded in response, not really wanting to talk about it in front of everybody.

+++

you sucked at wakesurfing. you were able to keep your balance for thirty seconds at most before you slipped, or the one time trevor tackled you into the water. which of course was filmed and posted onto trevor’s story, the embarrassing scream you had let out was now viewable to his thousands of followers

once you guys got off the boat you quickly made your way inside to see if luke had shown up yet, he still hadn’t. you quickly opened your phone to call him but got no response, now you were mad. you two had talked about the importance of communication and the risks of not knowing where the other was yesterday, and here he was doing the opposite of everything he asked of you yesterday.

to: luke <3

idk what the hell you’re doing right now but it has now been six hours since i’ve woken up and you’re still nowhere to be found and no one has heard from you.

to: luke <3

i’m going to dinner with your brothers, so wish me luck, and if i don’t hear back from you by the time it’s dark i will send in a missing persons report.

to: luke <3

just lmk you’re safe.

you weren’t planning on leaving for dinner for a couple more hours so you spent some time getting the proper measurements for some clothes you would be working on, as well as studying up on how to knit a sweater since you would be trying that for the first time when you went back home.

you didn’t change for dinner, just throwing one of luke’s michigan shirts on top of your swimsuit and putting your shorts back on. soon you made your way downstairs where it was just quinn waiting, everyone else apparently still getting ready. when you saw it was just him you quickly tried to make a run for it and go back to your room.

“you know you don’t have to avoid me, i think it’s about time we talked anyways.” quinn’s voice stopped you from going up the stairs. you wanted to keep walking away, you really did, but you knew you needed to have the discussion. you made your way back into the living room and sat on the couch seat furthest away from quinn.

“ok let’s talk.” you started once you sat down. “can you tell me why you did what you did?”

you got straight to the point, not wanting to spare any time.

“i was just looking out for my little brother, i didn’t know you.”

“-you still don’t know me. the only information you know about me is my name and that i’m an aspiring pre-med student at michigan.” you interrupted quinn, earning a glare in your direction.

“yes. i still don’t know you, but i’m hoping that in the next two weeks that you’re staying here i can get to know you.” he finished speaking with a sigh, like it almost pained him to say those words.

“wait what? i’m leaving tomorrow to go home, i’m not staying for an extra two weeks.” you were confused, your parents were expecting you home in the next twenty four hours.

“luke told me this morning that there was a change of plans and that you were going to be staying an extra two weeks.” quinn said, equally as confused. “did you not know this?”

you could only shake your head as an answer while you pulled your phone out to text luke.

to: luke <3

i don’t know if you were trying to surprise me with an extra two weeks at the lake house but i told you i couldn’t do that, my parents wont allow it.

from: luke <3

*image*

i’m with your parents right now, they said it’s okay. i’m at dinner with them though so i’ll talk to you later, but please wait to yell at me until i’m back at the lake house tonight. i’m gonna hit the road soon.

“that little shit.” you muttered, making quinn laugh.

“what did he do?”

“he has been ignoring my texts and calls all day, which is a problem on its own especially because of what happened yesterday, and now he is at dinner with my parents five hours away in my hometown convincing them to let me stay here longer than what was planned.”

“you don’t want to stay here longer? is it because of me and jack? because i meant what i said on the boat, i really am sorry. no matter what the circumstances were, i took it too far. i’m shocked it took you so long to call us assholes.” quinn’s last comment makes you laugh.

“i’m not gonna lie, you two are partially why i want to leave, but also because i know that next week more of your guys’ friends will be here and that ellen and jim are leaving, i just don’t want to intrude.” quinn nodded at your reasons.

“well if you do stay i think it would be a good time for me to properly get to know you, i would say that we could just start over and forget everything that happened…” he trailed off waiting for an answer from you.

“-not a chance. what you, and jack, did was not okay. i forgive, but i don’t forget.” before quinn could say anything in response the rest of the boys came downstairs and we all headed out to the cars to go to dinner.

+++

dinner was another interrogation, but this time it was almost all questions about you.

“so what do you do for fun?” that can be a loaded question, alex asked you it in hopes to be able to spark more conversations about things that might tie to your answers.

“well i like to design and create clothing, or add things to a boring sweatshirt from the thrift. i do lots of upcycling with things i find at goodwill.” you answered, not knowing how they would respond.

“do you have any pictures of things you have made in the past?” cole asked this time, you nodded and got out your phone. showing them some pullovers you had embroidered things onto, the swimsuits you had made from scratch for you and luke, the apron and hand towels that were gifted to ellen, as well as the ties and matching pocket squares that you made for the hughes boys.

“oh that’s the set you made for my dad.” jack said before pausing, noticing the embroidered initials and numbers on the ties next to the one his father owned. “were those our gifts?” he had gotten so quiet you were shocked you were able to hear it.

“yeah they were, still are if you want them, luke told me the colors of your teams and i went from there to make them.” you told jack before looking at quinn who had a matching look as his brothers.

“can’t believe you ever made gifts for them after how they had treated you.” trevor’s joke made you wince, it seems like they don’t know the full story.

“well i didn’t do it to get on their good side, i did it just because i thought this would be something they would enjoy, something personal to wear before games or at events, and creating things for people is something i really enjoy.” you kept your head down while talking, not wanting anyone to see the emotion in your face. the waitress soon brought everyone’s food out, you thanked anything and everything that lived up above as something was there to distract everybody for the time being.

+++

once back from dinner you went to hangout by the docks and watch the sunset, the boys had dropped you off per your request because you desperately needed some alone time. after the sun had fully set and you were pleased with the photos you had taken, you decided to go for a swim, stripping off your shirt and shorts, shivering as the cold breeze of the night came over you. you didn’t give yourself time to rethink your actions and jumped into the lake, you were freezing but it felt good. the cold being exactly what you needed.

you don’t know how long you were out there before you heard the sliding door open.

“babe are you out here?” luke’s voice brought immense comfort over you, it felt like it had been days since you’d last seen him. slowly swimming towards the steps you made yourself known.

“yes” you shouted, stepping out of the water and onto the dock. luke quickly made his way towards you, stopping once he was at the end of the dock and could see what you were wearing.

“you look really hot in that swimsuit.” you blushed at his compliment, and at the way his eyes were raking over your body. “you shouldn’t be able to look this hot babe.”

“oh really?” you said stepping closer to him, looking at his lower half to see if he had anything in his pockets, he didn’t. “well, we should do something about that then.” you reached out to grab his shoulders and turn him around, leaning in for a kiss, but before your lips could touch you shoved him into the water. “that’s what you get for ignoring me all day.”

you jumped into the water a few moments later, luke’s shocked face making you laugh harder.

“what the hell y/n.” luke asked once the shock from the cold died down in him.

“it seemed like you needed some cooling down, also you spent the whole day ignoring me and then went behind my back to get me to stay an extra two weeks.” you replied, swimming up closer to him, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“i have a surprise for you when we get back inside to make up for it.” luke’s arms instinctively wrapped around your waist.

you stayed like that for quite some time, luke filling you in on his day and vice versa.

“so quinn apologized to you and said he wanted to get to know you during the rest of your stay?” you nodded at his question, making luke’s smile grow wider than it already was. “that is so great y/n.”

as you were about to add something to what luke had said the sound of footsteps made you close your mouth.

“yeah mom they’re out here.” jack yelled back in the direction of the house. “you two are in trouble, get inside.”

+++

“so luke, do you see you and y/n lasting? like once you start in the NHL?”

you weren’t sure when you fell asleep, but you knew that you had woken up while luke’s brothers were grilling him about our relationship. you didn’t open your eyes, you knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but they should know the risks of talking loudly while someone sleeps a few inches away from them.

“i do see us lasting, for a long time. i know you guys might think this is premature but i can see myself spending the rest of my life with her.” luke’s words made your heart rate pick up, “i want her to come to new jersey, but after she has completed all her schooling. i can’t ask her to give up her education for me, it means too much to her.”

“but if she goes pre-med she will have a lot more years of school, it’s an extra four years and usually more. could you wait about ten years for her? is she worth it?”

“y/n is absolutely worth it, i don’t care how long it takes for her to finish school she is it for me.” tears had started to well up in your eyes, you couldn’t pretend to be asleep anymore.

you shot up from your spot on the couch and tackled luke in a hug, you had never doubted luke’s commitment for you, but to hear him say it, especially to people who aren’t the biggest fan of you meant a lot.

“i love you luke.” you whispered, a few tears spilling out.

“i love you too baby.”

you both missed the look his brothers gave each other, a look that said “maybe she isn’t so bad”

+++

you didn’t make it into the pre-med program. your parents had opened the letter with you over facetime, you were crushed. yes you could apply next year, and every year after that until you got accepted, but you didn’t want to do that, you wanted to get into the program after one try and that didn’t happen.

luke was there for you, he held you while you cried, comforted you when trevor accidentally got you a congratulations balloon thinking you were accepted, and stayed with you during the days even though you knew he wanted to spend time with people that weren’t you.

one day you did force him to go out on the lake, dylan and mackie had arrived that morning and you know he wanted to hang out with them, even though he told you he was happy to spend the day with you. you spent a lot of the day cleaning, with ellen gone the house started to look like only teenage boys were staying there. once you were done with that you made lunch and headed back upstairs to finish your next task. after plenty of talks with your parents, and a few emails with your advisor, you decided to change your major to business. all your life you’d been making clothes, you thought you might just make a career out of it because you enjoy doing it so much. you hadn’t told anyone other than your parents, you were scared to. you didn’t want anyone, more specifically luke, to think you were giving up on becoming a medical examiner just because you got one rejection letter. and you did what you did best when you were anxious about something, you made clothes and cleaned. when luke went back to your hometown last week he grabbed your storage tote full of all the essentials, your sewing machine, the brand new embroidery machine your parents bought you to celebrate completing your first year of university, and way too many fabrics. while you’ve been bunkered up in luke’s room, not wanting to face the world just yet you’ve made lots of items. ties for jim, a sweater for ellen, another bathing suit for luke, and today you were determined to make matching shirts for you and luke. you started with making basic white tee, you could’ve easily bought them but there is no fun in that, and then you decided to do a heat transfer of the design you picked out.

they were gonna be gag gifts, every year one of the frats hosts a “twin” party where you and your date show up in matching outfits and this year you and luke were going together. your shirt would say “i 🩷 my boyfriend” with an image of the two of you on the back, and his would be the exact same but with girlfriend instead of boyfriend. the creation of the shirts didn’t take as long as you thought it would, so now you were looking for more things to do, you weren’t able to make a decision as luke’s door was opened by jack.

“hey me and quinn are going to get ice cream, would you like to come?” you accepted their offer, knowing that you needed to get out of the house.

it didn’t hit you that this would be the first time you would be alone with luke’s brothers, ever. sure you had your conversation with quinn the other night, but now that jack was here it made you just as fearful, a bit more even.

+++

“so what did you do today? i know that luke went out with dylan and mackie, we haven’t been seeing you much.” jack said once you all sat down for ice cream.

“well i assume you guys heard that i did not make it into the pre-med program so i’ve just been in a small slump lately–” you were cut off by quinn.

“we actually didn’t know, but that makes sense why trevor felt so guilty about the balloon he got you.”

“yeah, but today i actually switched my major. i’m gonna study business now, possibly entrepreneurship, i decided to pursue a career more based on starting my own clothing company.” you told the boys, who glanced at each other.

“well that is amazing, congratulations. have you told luke yet?” jack asked, beating quinn to speaking.

“no, you guys are actually the first people i’ve told, trying to avoid others thinking i’m giving up on pre-med.” the boys nodded at your reasoning, quinn decided to fill the silence this time.

“luke told us he brought up your clothing stuff, have you made anything?”

“yeah, i’ve made a couple ties, some shirts, a sweater, and a swimsuit.” you laughed at their shocked faces. “i’ve had a lot of free time since i haven’t been leaving the house.”

+++

it had now been five days since you switched your major and you still hadn’t told luke, even if you wanted to tell him you probably wouldn’t have the time to since he has been with dylan, mackie, and the couple other michigan players that have arrived at the house. this is one of the reasons why you didn’t want to stay any longer than a week, you knew luke was going to become distant when his friends showed up.

waking up to an empty bed became normal, luke and the other boys would do some training in the mornings. so like you did yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, you got up and made your way downstairs to make breakfast. quickly distracted by the mess that had been made from what you assumed were smoothies or homemade protein shakes. you silently cursed whoever made the mess while you cleaned it up, then moving on to do some laundry. towels and swimsuits had been piling up in a very overfilled basket and you knew none of the boys were gonna do it. once the load was in you moved on to tidy up the living room, folding blankets, fluffing pillows, vacuuming.

“stress cleaning?” you whipped your head around to see jack sitting on top of a freshly fluffed pillow and unfolding a blanket.

“no, why would you think that?” you said, while walking over to get him off of the loveseat to make it presentable again.

“because you still haven’t told luke about switching majors and the more you hold off the worse you think he is going to react.” jack stated, “also, you just kicked me out of my seat to do whatever the hell that is.” pointing to you as he sat down on the floor.

you scoffed and stopped karate chopping the throw pillow once it looked nice enough. “you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“just tell him y/n, i’m serious. he is only going to be more hurt the longer you take to tell him, and you don’t wanna hurt my brother, i’ve just started to like you.” he smirked when you glared at him.

“haha very funny jack.”

“what’s got you so scared to tell him anyways?” jack asked in a much softer tone of voice, patting the spot on the carpet next to him.

you sat before sighing. “i don’t want him to think i’m giving up on something just because of one small hardship. all the time i hear him bragging to his teammates and friends about how his girlfriend is super smart and is gonna be the best doctor for the dead in the world one day, i’m scared to disappoint him.” you felt a couple tears in your eyes before you continued to speak. “i’ve seen him researching med schools near newark, one’s that have the best program for medical examiners. he believes in me, he knows i could do this even if i don’t, and i don’t want him to think i’m dumbing myself down to a bachelors in the most basic study field ever.” by the end of your small rant the tears had begun falling, they weren’t sobs but they were there.

“y/n, luke loves you so much. you getting a four year degree in business is not going to change that, yes he is your number one supporter when it comes to you becoming a medical examiner, but that doesn’t mean he won’t be your number one supporter when it comes to you being a fashion designer, or whatever it is you want to do i’m a little confused.” you laughed as jack continued. “do you know how much shit me and the guys have given him for some of the things he wears, we don’t even call him luke anymore he is just “simp” to us now, but he doesn’t care about that, he cares about you and your happiness, and if getting made fun of for wearing matching swimsuits with you or wearing a hat with your initials on it means making you happy, he is going to do it. he will be there for you no matter what because he loves you, and i can see why he does. you’re an amazing person y/n, and i’m so sorry for how i have been treating you over the past ten months. i know that sorrys aren’t enough to make up for what we did to you, but i hope it can be a start to us becoming friends because i need more people to bother luke with me.” you smiled and pulled jack into a hug, thanking him for the apology and kind words as well as forgiving him.

“one more thing, did he really refer to you as a future doctor for the dead?” jack asked, laughing a little.

“yes, it was so funny.”

+++

you and jack decided to watch a movie while you waited for luke to come back from training, quinn soon joined you two on the floor after he had woken up. it was nice, there was no awkward tension, no glares being thrown in your direction, you felt like you were all getting along for the first time and that made you smile.

“um why are you all on the floor?” dylan’s voice cut the peacefulness that had come over the three of you, all three of you quickly looked away from the tv to see the boys all back from training. you made eye contact with luke who was looking at you with a shocked, but very happy, expression. you just smiled and gave him two thumbs up, before turning towards jack and quinn to excuse yourself. you made your way to luke and gave him a kiss and grabbed his hand to take him upstairs, but not before telling jack to switch the laundry loads for you.

+++

once you were in luke’s room he began asking you questions about what he had just walked in on.

“well i was stress cleaning and jack walked in on me doing it and somehow got me to tell him about all my problems, if hockey doesn’t work out for him you should tell him to join the counseling field, but after i went a mini rant about what i’ve been fixated on lately he apologized and we talked everything out and i think we are officially on good terms.” you said in one breath, smiling as luke wrapped you up in a hug.

“what about quinn? is everything okay between you two?” you nodded and explained that you had talked it out with him a couple days ago.

+++

you and luke started getting ready for the dinner party that the hughes brothers were invited to and you were going as luke’s plus one, you didn’t fully understand what it was for but all you knew was that it was a semi-formal event, making it the perfect opportunity to have luke wear the tie you made him a few days prior, the one that matched your soft pink dress.

as you were doing your makeup luke spoke up again, going back to your conversation from before.

“wait babe, you said that you were stress cleaning. what are you stressed about?” luke asked, walking into the bathroom and leaning against the counter. you looked at him through the mirror and continued applying mascara as you told him.

“about a week ago, after i got the rejection letter, i switched my major to business and entrepreneurship, to pursue a career in fashion. i didn’t tell you because i was nervous on how you would react, and the longer i kept it from you the more stressed out i got. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner, i know how excited you were to be dating a genius and now i’ve let you down.” you looked at his face to see his reaction, but his face wasn’t telling you anything.

silence took over the bathroom as luke tried to find the right words to say.

“you could never let me down y/n, yes i am a little upset that it took you so long to tell me, but i understand why you did it. i am proud of you and everything you have accomplished so far. so med school isn’t for you? you are going to kick ass in the fashion industry babe, they won’t know what hit them.” he smiled at you before wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his head on your shoulder. “i love you y/n, never doubt that.”

“i love you too luke.”

+++

you and luke sat in the living room waiting for his brothers to come downstairs, you began to get a little antsy as you feared you would be late if you didn’t leave in the next five minutes.

“would you two hurry up! y/n is pacing back and forth cursing you guys for making us late.” luke yelled up to his brothers, who quickly made their way downstairs.

“sorry we weren’t sure how to tie these ties.” quinn said once they were both at the bottom of the steps.

you looked up at them and instantly began smiling. “you’re wearing them.”

jack and quinn looked at you, both with huge grins on their faces, before pulling you into a hug. they were wearing the ties you had made them for the holidays, nearly a year ago.

“we love our gifts.” and “better late than never” were said but you weren’t sure who said which.

you quickly called for luke to stand with his brother so you could take a photo of the three of them.

“you better post that on your main y/n, show the world you have the coolest future brother in-laws ever.” jack shouted as he raced luke for shotgun.

you don’t know how you got so lucky.

+++

note: OMG it’s done. this was a bit hard to write because the whole time i was horrified it would flop or people wouldn’t like it, and i’m still horrified lols (the ending is so rushed i don't like it). anyways i hope you enjoyed, feedback is so greatly appreciated. it lets me know what i’m doing that people like and what i could be changing about my writing. just hoping this one does number like lucky did. have a great day, love y’all babes <3!!

#luke hughes #luke hughes imagine #luke hughes x reader #nhl imagine #nhl fanfiction #New Jersey Devils #ahonice writes #jack hughes #quinn hughes

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preciadosbass · 3 months ago

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23/8/24 [draft from friday — key + significant photos at end]

yay i can finally post this!! woke up at 6:30 and said goodmorning to boris. he was inside again, i think because of how cold it is out. i then got dressed as soon as i could so i was completely ready before the time we had to leave to go away. i put on a light gray low cut shirt, but then started freezing alive so i changed into my sleeping with sirens shirt as it was the only shirt out that i hadn’t already packed. i paired it with black ripped skinny jeans, gray + black striped arm warmers, knee high converse, danger days my chemical romance zip up, my kellin quinn necklace, a surfboard shaped wood carved necklace — and no cuffs/bracelets as this outfit is just to be worn for the car ride to the campus and then ill get changed for swimming.

after getting ready, i had a snack and painted my left hand’s nails with black nail polish. i surprisingly did them pretty neatly to how i usually do it and considering how small my nails are. within a few minutes of them being dried, half of my second smallest nail’s polish came off halfway lmao - i was going to put some more on to cover it up, but i was in a rush and i needed to do my teeth, i finished at 7. i then checked on boris again and replaced the pins on my bag. ive needed to ever since i took a ton off to put onto my jacket. all that’s left now is: incubus pin, spider-man pin, the last of us pin, t-rex pin, saliva pin, kittie pin, shark pin, beetle pin, brendon urie pin, chi cheng pin, soulfly pin, collide with the sky [pierce the veil] pin, and a silent hill pin. which sounds like a lot, but because of the way they’re set out, it dosent look like many. at least not compared to what i’m used to.

once i was done [7:18], i packed my bag. i packed: my camera, skeleton gloves, collage scraps, my collage journal, camera charger, headphone charger, extra bracelets, my spiral earrings, battery packs, my hairbrush, my wallet, hand sanitizer, meds, and my phone charger. after doing that and a few other odd bits around the house [turning off switches, making sure i’ve packed everything, etc] i went to see boris properly at 7:40. i told him about everything that’s going to be going on [who’s taking care of him, that she’s not comfortable letting him out, when we’re getting back, things like that] and said goodbye to him. i finished officially at 8:20. i’m gunna miss him so much while we’re away, but i’m excited to see him again afterwards and tell him everything.

everyone [me, my sister, my parents] got in the car at around the same. unrelated, but i also forgot to mention in yesterdays journal, archie was taken over to my sister’s friends house to be looked after. we set off at 2:30 and i looked through soul punk patrick stump videos along with a few pretty odd era panic! tiktoks. also watched my chemical romance’s song 2 [blur] cover, i don’t know why i haven’t seen this before i’m obsessed. i started journaling at 9:16 and wrote all of the paragraphs above. than at 9:30 i took a break and started listening to some music. [just surrender, fall out boy, gerard way + ray toro, frank iero, falling in reverse, blur, my chemical romance, death of a bachelor panic! at the disco, a static lullaby.]

i had a nap somewhere near 11:30 [on my seal plush] and woke up at around 12:40. i continued listening to music [CKY, HIM, frank iero, darling you should be ashamed, linkin park, lovehatehero, before today, a bullet for a pretty boy [[so underrated]], and sleeping with sirens.] i did so until 1:44 when we arrived at the resort. my dad pulled the car into the drive through place where you get your keycard/folder of leaflets and after driving round to our car park, we started unpacking into the room. on our holiday guide, it said that we could only get in our room at 3, so we were lucky to get in early. as soon as i found me & my sisters room and claimed my bed, and hung up my necklaces on the windows’ handle. along with taking a few things out of my bag + putting cuffs/band bracelets on. we did plan on going to swimming as soon as my extended family arrived, but that ended up not working out as they had to leave late.

i then took out my collage journal and started cutting up the leaflets from the folder into separate letters [etc] to make a collage tomorrow. well i say tomorrow, when i started cutting everything up, i intended for me to put everything together today. [photo at end] but i only got round to collecting the bits of paper i need. i used my stamps to print stars onto a yellow sticky note and took a couple pictures of the leaflets incase we needed anything off them after id cut them up [e.g wifi support]. me, my parents and my sister left for a show and arrived at the venue at 3:12. on the way to the venue, we met up with D [one of my cousins, his girlfriend — L, and her son, W.] we got the time wrong so we thought were really short on time, but it started 20 minutes after we found a table.

first up was a beatboxer, except he made more sound affects than sounds to make into some kind of song. he was also really funny with the way he made and timed the sound affects. it’s impossible for me to explain with unless you were there and saw him, but he was really good. next was four breakdancers, ive never really had much interest in breakdancing, but it was quite cool to watch them. one had come all the way down from japan or something.

after was one of those big hoop acts. there’s not much to say as there’s not much to explain — following on from that, a bmX rider came out and started doing all kinds of crazy tricks. i somewhat remember seeing the show itself around a year ago, but this bmX guy was different than last year. its tricky to explain a bmX show generally, but its even trickier for people to read id they don’t know what it is. so i recommend looking up bmX tricks. once he’d done his thing, a basketballer came onto stage. he was manipulating the ball and circling it around him shoulders etc. behind him was a fake button with “do not push” plastered above it. obviously, it’s a show, he ‘pressed’ the button and everytime another ball would roll out from backstage.

in the end, he was working with 5 different basketballs. it was super impressive. before the show finished, everyone came out and did all their tricks side by side. during the entire show, the beatboxer was singing and making even more sound affects. he actually had a pretty decent voice. at 4:30, after we’d all packed up our stuff and gotten ready to leave and do something else, me, my parents and my sister headed back to our room. D, L and W went off to their rooms aswell. upon getting into our chalet, i went to have a nap but ended up putting on my skates. my sister stuck on hers and we circuited a section of the resort, looking for D’s room. it didn’t take us long before we found it. but during skating around and checking door numbers, i stupidly sped round a corner on the second level of chalets and nearly fell headfirst down a huge staircase.

i assumed that it’d turn and go round the other side, so i could look at the numbers on the other rooms, as a few other of the second story ‘balconys’ or whatever you wanna call them - don’t have stairs and just follow on around the other side. but i was wrong. i slightly toppled down the first two stairs and then grabbed onto my sister’s back. luckily i didn’t make her fall over lmao // at 5:30, all of us [all of my family] went round to our restaurant for dinner. it was a little cheeky of us to even eat together as everyone in the family apart from my parents & sister have reservations for another restaurant.

after dinner, i went back to the room and stayed there for 30 minutes alone before me, my sister and my parents made our way to yet another show. we arrived at the venue and i sat near the front on the floor with my sister. my mum sat on some stairs and my dad stayed standing. it was a magic show, which is quite a complicated thing to explain, especially because i actually didn’t understand how any of the tricks were done, but i enjoyed it. also while the backstage staff were sorting out some more props the start of my generation by limp bizkit played!!

the show finished at 8, and me and my immediate family went round to the rest of the family’s chalets to check them out. i went into the more cousin based one first, the people staying in it were: RY and H, and R and E. i sat on R’s bed and just people watched [mostly] until H offered to paint my right hand’s nails dark purple as id forgotten to paint that hand in black when i was at home. then i went to see the rest of my family’s room. the family members in this chalet are my aunt and uncle, and L/W. when i came in my uncle had a jumper over the radiator and it smelt so bad and was clearly just about to light on fire. i went back into the cousin’s room/s and went to see E and see what she was doing.

she was applying gems to her eyelids with some kind of makeup glue. she asked if i wanted some and i agreed so she sat me down and gently glued the gems onto my face. [photo at end] when she was done and if verified i was happy with it, i went back to my room to quickly get something — i’m not sure what it was as im writing this on the 27th. when i got back at 9:10, we had to leave for another show. we walked across the resort and arrived at the venue to get ourselves some seats. me and E tried taking pictures of our gemmed-up eyelids together but wasn’t able to because of bad lighting. the show was advertised as a ‘rock’ festival, however the music that played was things like lizzo and ed sheeran.

i was kind of disappointed because i thought it’d be punk rock or something else i would be able to sing along to, but it was funny that we were catfished so bad. me and R just sat there making faces for eachother, indicating that ‘this isn’t rock, wtf is this’ - the performance ended at 10:20 and we went straight to another venue to join in with a ‘music dance party.’ as you can imagine, the music was dance music, but i like dance music. i somewhat danced with my grandad, E and R. R spun me around and my sister stayed swaying across the dance floor with my dad. [photo at end]

i haven’t really ever seen my dad dance before, but his favourite ‘party’ track came on and he went mad. he was doing all sorts of weird dance moves but it was cracking me up. if only whoever is reading this saw it in the moment. we parted with the rest of the family and went back to the chalet at approximately 11:30. i started to do a bit of my journal, made a picture collage of the day, and had a little nap. after my nap, i asked my parents questions about boris, said goodnight to boris via a picture of him [the picture in question is at the end] and went to sleep at 1:45.

🗝️ — boris/my cat, archie/my immediate family’s dog, questions about boris/i ask my parents questions about my cat to verify he's okay + will be okay in the morning. its a compulsive thing and i'm hopefully going to be tested for OCD in the future.

have a good day/night O_o

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themultifandomgal · 2 years ago

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Adam Ruzek- Shirts

Prompts11&30 Are you wearing ____ shirt? Are you wearing last nights clothes?

Adam and I have been dating in secret now for a few months. The reason we have kept it secret is because of my dad Hank Voight, plus Adam and I are partners in intelligence. Last night I slept over at Adams place, but unfortunately I didn't have any clean clothes there so I'm having to wear what I had on yesterday and hope no one notices. Adam arrived to work 10 minutes before me

"Morning Trudy" I smile at the woman behind the desk. Trudy frowns looking at me then goes back to whatever she's doing

"Morning" she mutters. I scan myself in and walk up to intelligence. Straight away I head to the break room so I can make myself a coffee

"Are you wearing yesterdays clothes? Who's the lucky guy?" Erin, the girl that practically my sister, wiggles her eyebrows as she walks in to the break room

"What a girl can't own two of the same black jeans and black shirt?" I cross my eyebrow "and anyway maybe I'm saving on my washing" I go back to making my coffee and Erin shuts the door behind her

"I know that look, you got some last night. So spill"

"No way. I know you. I'll tell you who will tell Jay who will tell Antonio who will tell his wife who will probably say something to Trudy so by that time not only will all of 21 know but the whole of 51 and Med will know"

"Ok ok" Erin holds up her hands and leaves the break room as I pour my hot water into the coffee cup.

Once again I stay over at Adams place. We hadn't long ordered Chinese food when I hear a knock on the door

"I'll get the door" I call out as Adam is in the shower. Opening up the door I'm shocked to see Jay holding up beer cans

"What are you doing here? Are you wearing Adams shirt?" It then seems to click in his mind "it's you!"

"Shhh" I pull Jay in

"Your the one Adam is sleeping with"

"Damn it Jay. Do not tell anyone do you understand?"

"Or what?" Jay smirks making me give him daggers "0k my lips are sealed" Jay holds up his hands in the air "but it won't be long until everyone else figures it out"

"Well we've done alright for the last 3 months" I lead Jay over to the couch and sit down

"So where is lover boy?"

"He's in the shower he'll be out in a couple of minutes"

Like I said Adam walks out with his towel wrapped around his waist and rubbing his now damp hair with another towel. Looking fine as hell might I add. He stops in his tracks when we sees Jay and I having a beer in my hand

"Ah here he is"

"I thought..." he looks at me a little confused

"I was the Chinese food? Yeah sorry to disappoint. Came over to have a beer with you but was a little shocked when I say YN open the door"

"She came over to watch the game" Adam says trying to give us a cover

"That's the worst lie I've ever heard. We both know YN hates football"

"He figured it out anyway. Said he wasn't going to tell anyone"

"Hmmm. I'll get changed and join you both" I watch as Adam walks back into his bedroom. Jay gives me a nudge and wiggles his eyes. I roll mines and take a sip of my beer. Once Adam is changed he settles on the couch next to me with an arm around me and me leaning into him. Before I know it I'm asleep.

Just like before Adam arrives before me, luckily I have clean clothes because I decided to go home first to get changed. When I arrive I greet Trudy who gives me a smirk

"Have fun last night?" I frown at her

"Erm yeah?" Then it dawns on me. Jay!

I run up to intelligence

"JAY HALSTEAD!" I yell making my way up to him "you told everyone about me and Adam?"

"No, but you just did"

"Adams the guy you've been seeing!" Erin shouts

"Why are you all shouting?" dad comes out of his office clearly irritated

"Errr..."

"YN and Adam..." Jay starts saying but Erin puts her hand over his mouth to stop him any further

"YN, Adam my office. Now!" As I walk past Jay I make eye contact

"Your dead" I whisper and walk into my dads office bracing myself for what's about to come.

#one chicago #one chicago imagine #adam ruzek #adam ruzek imagine #adam ruzek x reader #Adam Ruzek x yn #chicago pd

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writingmaidenwarrior · 10 months ago

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Sin Eaters Part 9

Yeah, I finally managed to finish this part. I can't believe it. Too much jumping around scenes on my side recently. Have some funny new thing @cljordan-imperium

Stretching her fingers, Talindra looked down on the tactical bracelet they all wore when they are out in official matters. The magic it held always made her itchy and she could see from the corner of her eyes same went for Wynthan.

“Itchy, eh?”

“Yeah, the magic collides with ours”, he sighed.

She understood what he meant with ours. The horned one magic, not magic in general. Other magic users in her company never lamented about it and the doctors always calmed her down with this being just a sensitivity to the magic. If they would have known. A bitter laugh escaped her.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, just thinking about how the meds always said I was just too sensitive to its magic.”

A moment later Wynthan joined the bitter laugh and nodded with an eyeroll.

“In some way it is true but not for the reason they thought.”

“Yeah, the only one I knew who also lamented about it itching was Eshfyrr…. Wait…”

The browns knitted together she stopped and glanced up to Wynthan as they walked down the path to the main street up to the portal.

“I need to catch him during training the first chance we get.”

Wynthan’s smirk was weird, but Talindra realized why it was there the moment she heard footsteps close by as they reached the main street to the portal.

“Tal!”

Eshfyrr came running with a broad smile, also in civilian clothes but wearing the tactical bracelet. Right behind him was his partner Ylvante, who slowly strolled behind him.

“Not so fast, we aren’t going anywhere”, she laughed.

Eshfyrr slowed down in time right before he crashed into Wynthan.

“Sorry guys, I just wanted to take the chance to greet you. Where are you going?”

“Archives. Trying to find some info about my family.”

“What a lucky coincidence”, Ylvante stated in a calm voice but there was a knowing smile towards Wynthan.

“You too?”, Wynthan took the ball he got thrown to Talindra’s surprise.

She pulled Eshfyrr aside and watched whatever would unfold between those horned ones.

“Yes, we are also on our way. Eshfyrr and I came to the conclusion, since we have a lot of time at hand, we can use it to find info on his family since his parents were Sin Eaters. I assume same counts for you, Talindra?”

“Yeah, but wait a second… Esh, you never said a word. I told you all the way.”

Sheepishly Eshfyrr rubbed his neck and looked aside while Talindra tried to find his eyes.

“I didn’t know myself. I puzzled it together with Ylvante’s help yesterday. I only knew I was adopted.”

“I suggest we should go. The earlier we arrive, the faster we get access. We can sort out the rest there.”

The pragmatism in Ylvate was somewhat unsettling but Talindra had to admit he was right. He raised his hands and hushed them all back on the path.

Like little ducklings they continued their way to the transit portal. As unsuspicious as she could Talindra watched Wynthan and Ylvante. There was some strange tension she felt but couldn’t name and she was curious what it was about.

Her thoughts got disrupted by Eshfyrr grabbing her arm and smiling at her.

“Wondering who your parents were?”

His excitement was sweet and innocent. She looked up to Ylvante who noticed her gaze and gently shook his head. He clearly was aware she knew more.

“Honestly, I am curious if there are any relatives left. You know my aunt and uncle died during the east wall incident years ago. They never talked about any siblings or their parents.”

“The east wall incident?”, Ylvante repeated astonished, “Wasn’t it the breakdown of the safety wall when some low-class monster ran against it and rampaged through the living quarters?”

“Yes, I had been dispatched in the North to clear out a camp of monster that came too close and only learned about it when I was back.”

“When exactly did this happen?”, Wynthan asked with a glance Talindra already knew to read as he had a thought.

“About seven years ago. It was during my first year after I signed my ten years contract with the defense unit. Ever since then I only stayed at the quarters when back in the city when I am not out with comrades.”

She shrugged it off, but his look didn’t change and even Ylvante wore a similar one. Eshfyrr threw her a questioning glance, but Talindra could only shrug. Ignoring the whole thing was the best option now, so she activated the portal and hit the symbol for the archives on the panel in front of her.

“You coming?”

The smirk on Wynthan was the only response as he stepped next to her and grabbed her hand to pull her with him. It wasn’t clear if it was his action or the portal that send those funny tingling sensations through her, but Talindra decided for the sake of her sanity it was the portal.

A few second later they stood on the huge place in front of the archives on the other side of the city on top of everything right next to the halls of the triumvirates. The closeness to the latter ones sent a cold chill through her as she remembered how the whole raffle was rigged and what their shadowy planes with the Sin Eaters were. Wynthan squeezed her hand as if he could read her mind and tucked gently towards the huge doors of the archives.

The moment was over when Eshfyrr and Ylvate stepped out of the portal behind them.

“Eternals blessed me, that is impressive”, Eshfyrr stated barely above a whisper.

“Don’t exaggerate like this”, Talindra teased him.

She turned around and found Ylvante had wrapped his arms around Eshfyrr from behind and softly nudged him to move ahead. Before she could acknowledge it, she felt Wynthan pull her towards the doors, making her stumble the first steps in the progress. Giggling she followed and threw herself into his side.

“Jealous again?”, she mouthed and got a huff in response.

The barely visible nod towards the doors was enough to know he would tell her once they were inside and on their own. Slowly the morning became weirder and weirder.

Behind the huge wooden doors was an equally huge entrance hall with multiple desks. It was almost sterile in this light grey and beige coloring with even the desks being of some light grey stone. They picked the closes one and stepped in front of it. The middle-aged man looked up with a sigh.

“How can I help you?”

“I like to have access to the Sin Eater archives and the civilian logs.”

He tilted his head with a frown as his gaze went to her bracelet and then to Wynthan with his horns. A tired huff followed, and he pushed some device over the counter.

“Put your bracelet over it. It will add the access to the part of the archives your security level allows you. It will be the requested archives and the history archives. The doors will open for you as long as you have your bracelets with you.”

“Uhm, well thank you.”

Confused Talindra looked up to Wynthan who was equally astonished about how fast and easy it went. Once her bracelet glowed for a moment as reaction to the new information getting fed to it, she took her arm away and step aside for Wynthan. A desk over Eshfyrr and Ylvante went through the same procedure. Eshfyrr was first and she motioned to Wynthan she took the chance to talk to him for a moment.

As Talindra walked by him, she grabbed her friend by his wrist and pulled him towards the next door where they would be heading anyway. In a movement as she wanted to playfully ruffle his hair she went straight to the area where horns would be if her thoughts about him earlier were right.

Eshfyrr’s eyes widened in shock when he realized what she was about to do but couldn’t say anything in this surrounding beside playing along. For a second, she felt bad for being a little manipulative in this moment, but she needed to know fast and smirked when the well-known rough sensation of filed down horns hit her fingers.

She continued the movement to ruffle his hair and hugged him tight.

“Don’t worry. I am like you”, she whispered into his ear.

Eshfyrr went from stiff in panic to melting in relive in from one breath to the other in her arms and hugged her back.

“Does he know?”

“Yeah. And he?”

“Yeah.”

Both laughed relieved and amused. Slowly they let go of each other only to face two questioning glances. Talindra and Eshfyrr nodded toward each other in silent agreement to share their newfound knowledge later.

“You will learn soon, Natty-boy. Come, we have an awful lot of work ahead.”

“I need to have a word with you about calling me this”, Wynthan snickered.

“Admit it, you like it.”

With a bump of her hips against his she stepped through the door. Behind her she heard the other laugh at her.

“Is she always like this?”, Ylvante asked.

“This is the toned-down version”, Eshfyrr chuckled what caused a pained groan from Wynthan.

A part of her hoped he imagined what the version of her looked like when she went in full force. The huge plate ahead of them took Talindra’s full attention and she walked faster to see where they needed to go. Concentrated on the various floors and wings she didn’t notice Wynthan coming up behind her until he growled into her ear.

“Didn’t you want to behave?”

“I behave. Within my normal behavior.”

“Devil you.”

Eshfyrr cleared his throat next to them with a smile and nodded to the plate.

“Looks like we need only the East Wing. Everything is there. Second and forth floor.”

“We should start with the Civilian records on the fourth floor”, Talindra suggested, “Without having our parents names we won’t get anywhere.”

“Look more closely”, Ylvante pushed with a strange tone, “The Civilian logs are on second and third floor, the Sin Eater logs fourth and fifth. I would suggest since we need information of the newer kind to start at fifth floor.

Wynthan behind her took a deep breath as to calm himself but kept silent. Awful silent for him if Talindra compared it to the previous day.

“Then let’s head to the fifth.”

They moved over to the elevators and stopped a little surprised. It was only big enough for three of them because of Wynthan’s and Ylvante huge built. Eshfyrr and Talindra stepped inside with big grins.

“You need to decide who rides up with us”, Eshfyrr joked.

Before Wynthan could suggest something, Ylvante stepped a few steps back and motioned to him to enter.

“How generous of you. See you upstairs.”

Talindra used the moment to check the elevator for any signs of being bugged. Her glance to Wynthan said he did the same.

“It’s safe, I guess. The whole building is.”

“No bugs?”, Eshfyrr asked to be sure.

Talindra smiled as she saw how he nervously chewed on the corner of his lower lip.

“No bugs or any other devices. Apparently, the archives aren’t interesting enough”, Wynthan stated amused but turned slightly to Eshfyrr, “I like to ask you for a favor. I know from Tal’s reaction you are like her. I know Ylvante longer than you and until he proves he has changed I don’t trust him to have this information.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Me neither”, Talindra joined her comrade’s confusion.

“He is a rat. He will do anything to get better accommodation, treated better, get better food or whatever. He was most of the time the reason the members in our trainings company had to do extra training.”

The icy feeling this revelation brought run through her whole body and she felt her face turn to stone.

“Extra training?”

“Torture to brainwash them”, Talindra explained instead of Wynthan.

The moment she said it, Eshfyrr’s expression changed to unreadable.

“He didn’t tell any of this.”

“There is a lot he likely didn’t tell”, Wynthan stated.

The escalator door opened, and they stepped outside.

“So much?”

There was something in Eshfyrr Talindra always loved about him: How fast he adjusted to new information.

“If you want, I try to get in contact with some horned one elders to learn more about all this.”

“Let me know when you got a day. I want to come with you.”

“I will. I just need your information where you live.”

Eshfyrr raised his finger and with a speed she rarely saw and even made Wynthan huff surprised, he opened the menu of his tactical bracelet and opened his personal information. Talindra held her bracelet over it and checked if the data got copied.

“Gotcha. Like this we also can better coordinate our training. I need to get Kylantha next.”

“That would be helpful indeed. Training in groups, even if we can’t be sure we will form a squad will at least help find a rhythm within a squad frame. Our life depends way too much in this out there.”

With a worried look out of the window Wynthan stated it.

“We get the other’s info as soon as we can. It is a surprise we don’t have them anyway. Like he said, training in a squad already gets a feeling for how things work”, Eshfyrr mused aloud.

Slowly they wandered a few steps away from the escalator.

“Maybe they wanna see who gets to training by themselves, what groups form and so on. All these little psychological games they always play.”

The men nodded slowly at Talindra’s words.

“Would make some weird sense.”

“What would make sense?”, Ylvante stepped out of the escalator with an unreadable face.

“The higher up not giving us the personal information of the other new Sin Eaters to see what groups form by itself”, Talindra repeated thoughtful.

Ylvante snickered the first time since she met him and stepped in front of her.

“Worried about a friend?”, he bent down with a small smile.

For some reason she couldn’t pinpoint it felt like he was interrogating her. She raised an eyebrow at him and huffed, making herself as tall as possible.

“No, worried about staying alive and how to archive it when we can’t train with the others to get to know how they fight, what their abilities are and so on.”

His smile faltered and he straightened up again with an unreadable face.

“That is true. I suggest we should use today for research and see tomorrow the trainings arena and wait who shows up as well.”

“Sounds fair”, Wynthan stated.

Surprised he had stepped next to her at some point, Talindra looked up at him. Behind Ylvante she could see Eshfyrr grin about it like a schoolboy. As cover he opened the map they got on his bracelet interface and studied it.

“Since Tal and I are 28 and 27 years old, I think we should start with the records going back about 35 years?”

“Do you even have a name to look for?”, Talindra asked him.

His rapid blinking was all she needed to know.

“Oh, I think I should start with the Civilian logs then. I wasn’t taken in by family like you.”

Ylvante bent to a small bow and smiled at him.

“I am following your lead, Eshfyrr. This is your quest.”

“See you later up here”, Eshfyrr smirked and went back to the escalator.

Ylvante threw her and Wynthan one last glance, that almost felt threatening, before he followed. The soft glow of Wynthan’s tactical bracelet distracted Talindra and she turned to him, ignoring the knot building in her stomach.

“So, you father’s name?”

“Almyth Revran.”

“Interesting. I forgot your family name.”

“What is so interesting about it?”

“It used to be a horned one family name. I am curious how it made the jump over the fence, but it explains why your horned one blood is so strong. There must be more in you than you think.”

“Do you want to draw my family tree?”

She joked and went to the part of the archives that held the records of the last 50 years. The doors opened gently by themselves.

“What if I do?”

“You are welcome. I have no patience for the graphic part of such a search.”

With a few long steps he was right behind her and caught her mid step to hug her from behind with a low snicker.

“Lucky you, I find doodling calming.”

“Can I declare you my official family tree painter?”

Talindra craned her neck to somehow look at him but only got so far as to get their noses to touch.

“I am honored to do so.”

Slowly Wynthan let go of her and looked around to see if he could find some paper and pens laying around.

“What is your family name?”

The way he jumped told Talindra he was completely engulfed in his search.

“Dreywhin. Why are you asking?”

“Just curious”, she snickered and took his arm to pull him with her, “I am afraid you won’t find pen and paper. You need to note it in your bracelet for today.”

“I am afraid you are right.”

Again, Talindra stretched her fingers and bent her hands in all directions as if she was getting ready for hand-to-hand combat. Wynthan’s snicker behind her made her smile as she walked into the long hallway that held all record of the last 50 years. Her eyes scanned the first row and realized it was sorted in decades and then alphabetic.

“What a weird way to sort this?”, Wynthan commented behind her.

His habit to stand behind her since they arrived at the archives started to make Talindra question him.

“I know. Strangely it will make things easier for us now. We just need to find the entries with R over there and the next block. In one of them my father must appear.”

“Revran, you said?”

“Yes, Almyth Revran.”

Slowly his head came next to hers. His smile pressed against her cheek.

“I take the other block. This way we are faster.”

Fast like a snake her hand grabbed his head and accidentally brushed over the base of a horn. Wynthan breathed in sharp the same moment she turned in the small space to face him. When he opened the eyes again his gaze was clouded. Softly he licked his lips, breathing heavily.

“Sorry, I just wanted to stop you.”

Talindra crunched her face in shame and carefully watched his reaction. The deep growling snicker was nothing she expected, even less how he pressed her against the shelf and kissed her.

“Now you have your answer about the horns”, he whispered against her lips, breath hot on her face.

With a heavy gulp she nodded and snickered embarrassed. A mental note to not come close to his horns for the next weeks later, she rested her hands on his hips.

“Not the way I planned.”

A chuckle and a soft, shy kiss later Wynthan was gone. She swallowed the sigh and breathed in deeply to ignore the ideas in her head, that started to come to life. If she wanted to survive the next two and a half weeks she seriously needed to a grip of her imagination.

With a little delay she also started looking through the records. Since those before her were between 40 and 50 years old the chance was small she would find her father’s name in this block but since she didn’t know how old he was and if he was the older or younger brother, everything needed to be checked.

“Tal? I got him.”

“Wow, you are fast.”

“He is the first in the section with R over here”, Wynthan chuckled and waved with a folder.

While he took a look Talindra came over.

“Stop right there. You mother’s must be there. Look at Endiphal, Yelori.”

Stumbling almost over her steps, she stopped and looked which letter was next to her. She realized she needed to take a few steps back to reach E and started searching. The sound of his steps and how he leaned against the shelves behind them told her he caught up already.

Her eyes squinted against the strange, dimmed light Talindra finally found the folder she was looking for and pulled it out with a triumphant yell. Waving with it she tilted her head back to the entry area but stopped once they were there.

“A reading area is over there.”

Wynthan pointed to their left.

“You looked it up?”

“While you searched your mother’s file.”

The little proud smile was cute on him. He led the way to a small group of tables and armchairs. Both huffed surprised about the unexpected comfort. They took the first group and sat down. Questioning glances got exchanged.

“I don’t know if I am ready for this. I have my mother’s name now. This should help the elders to find relatives, right?”

Her arms rested in her lap as Talindra stared those two folders down. Wynthan wrapped an arm around her shoulder and gently rubbed her upper arm.

“I can copy the important data for you, and you take a look later, if you aren’t ready today.”

Why she hesitated now, Talindra couldn’t name. She knew her father was dead; the question was about her mother’s whereabouts.

Long seconds later, she threw her hands in the air and grabbed her mother’s file. There was a picture of her attached to the first page.

“You look like her.”

His voice was low and soft. In some way it was comforting to see she took after her mother. Even Talindra could recognize the same eyes and facial structure she saw every day in the mirror. The only difference was her mother’s face was more oval with a more prominent cheek bone and the hair was darker and curly, where Talindra’s was wavy.

“Yeah, you can’t deny she is my mom.”

With a small, proud smile Talindra scanned over the information and closed the file with a sigh.

“This won’t help.”

“What is wrong?”

Gently, Wynthan pried the file from her hands and opened it again.

“Yelori Endiphal was declared missing in action on 14th Surin, 547 a.S. after her partner Almyth Revran was the only survivor of a six people strong team to eliminate a small group of four double A monster of the earth shaker category south of the Koleran chasm. Revran couldn’t tell where Endiphal went to but got rescued with two newborns he claimed to be their children. Endiphal’s motherhood couldn’t be confirmed since no medical record of her pregnancy exists. The children were named Talindra and Leenmera. First one got handed to Revran’s brother and his wife. The other child was brought to Hell to see who would care for her since family couldn’t be claimed.”

Wynthan read slowly aloud for which Talindra was thankful because after she saw the date of death she closed it and didn’t look further.

“What? I have a twin?”

“A sister. Leenmera is a woman’s name, and she had horns at birth”, he verified.

“She must be in training now, right? Only three years before she becomes a Sin Eater. Oh Eternals, please let her be less stubborn than me.”

A soft squeeze on her shoulder followed a gentle sigh.

“If she is only half as smart as you, she will know how to avoid the worst. Let’s see who took care of her since the authorities didn’t plan to hand her to your family.”

“Thanks.”

“You are welcome.”

She leaned into him for a moment and let her mind wander. Her mother was MIA and she had a sister. This was clearly nothing she expected. Suddenly she remembered how her uncle told her, her father died shortly after she was born and frowned. With a weird feeling she took her father’s file and opened it.

“This is weird…”

“What?”

Wynthan leaned over the file. Talindra pointed at the last paragraph and started reading.

“Alymth Revran got declared missing in action on 23rd Arestel 547 a.S. after he left his squad during a mission west of Fyllim mountains and was never seen again. Declared dead 27th Arestel 547a.S.”

“That is only three months after you were born”, Wynthan stated confused.

“And he was also MIA. No one really knows what happened to them. Do you think he tried to find her?”

Carefully, he took the file out of her hands and looked at her.

“I know I would if it were you.”

Talindra felt her cheeks going warm and giggled sheepish.

“We still have some get to know to do, you know.”

“I know, but from what those records say, he knew something he didn’t tell. Maybe both did. I know plenty of horned ones who went MIA in this area between the mountains and the chasm. Why, I don’t know, but maybe we will find out in the future, but I know I would never leave my partner out there alone, even less the mother of my children.”

His serious look, and even more serious tone sent shivers down her spine in all the good ways. Out of an impulse she interwove her free hand with his and nodded.

“There you are”, Eshfyrr’s voice sounded off from the main area.

Not knowing if she wanted to kill or hug him, Talindra slightly turned her head to him.

“You found your parents’ names?”

“Yeah”, Eshfyrr beamed excited, “I already know my father had no family that’s why I got put up for adoption. My mother’s name is Thesstasti Dreywhin. Now I try to figure out if she is still an active Sin Eater.”

Ylvante slowly approached them as well with a sour expression once he noticed how Talindra and Wynthan sat there but she couldn’t care less about him.

“Thesstasti Dreywhin?”, Wynthan repeated amused.

Now Talindra also made the connection and started to snicker.

“Yeah, you know her?”

“Oh, I do. She is my aunt.”

With a soft kiss on her temple Wynthan unfolded from her and got up to a seriously baffled Eshfyrr.

“What?”

“Ylvante knows my family name, he could have given you a pointer. So, we are cousins. Mom will laugh for days about this coincidence. Aunt Thess is still active. I think she has about ten more years as Sin Eater, but that means we can contact her now through the internal system.”

Eshfyrr fell in a free chair opposite of Talindra and stared at the ground.

“That wasn’t how I expected things to go.”

“Believe me, I know how you feel. I just learned I have a twin sister”, she stated dryly.

“Wow, that is tough.”

The second Wynthan stepped next to Eshfyrr, Talindra knew what was coming and bit her tongue. The surprised yell of Eshfyrr echoed from the walls when Wynthan surprise hugged him.

“My older brother is back from a mission and will be around for a while. He offered to help with training, so you got to meet more of the family.”

“You will like him. Less enthusiastic puppy than him”, Talindra teased with her thumb pointing at Wynthan, “And his partner reminds me of Kylantha a lot.”

“In this case, I assume we are done here?”, Ylvante stated questioningly towards Eshfyrr who was still in the middle to wrap his head around all of it.

The way how he tried to get away from them and indirectly ordered Eshfyrr to tag along didn’t sit well with Talindra. If it wasn’t for the things, she already heard from Wynthan to dislike Ylvante, the behavior he displayed now was enough.

“You can go if you like. I stay little longer. I guess Tal isn’t done yet?”

She shook her head with a sigh.

“I need to figure out who adopted my sister and if there is any family left on one side.”

The sour expression on Ylvante’s face grew stronger but he nodded.

“In this case, I head back and organize dinner. See you tonight, Eshfyrr.”

He slightly dropped his head in goodbye and turned to leave. All three watched him entering the elevator and the doors closing behind Ylvante. Talindra breathed out relieved.

“What the fuck was that?”

“That was civil for him”, Wynthan remarked.

“He got strange the moment I found my mother’s name but now I know why. He probably doesn’t like having a connection to you”, Eshfyrr stated matter of fact.

“I wouldn’t be surprised. I taught him his games can be played by two.”

Confused by his statement Talindra glanced at Wynthan, who chuckled deep.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t rat him out to the higher-ups, but I made sure the others in the barracks knew it was him who was the rat after I realized it was him.”

Surprisingly, Eshfyrr giggled slightly maliciously.

“He had it coming. But Tal needs help, right?”

“I can do it alone. I just need to find out who adopted my sister”, she pushed him down on a chair close by, “I guess you two have some stuff to talk about.”

“Are you sure?”, Wynthan asked worried.

“I am. Esh needs to be filled in and this place is safe.”

“We will be coming down with you. There is also a resting area.”

Before Talindra could reply Eshfyrr got up again and marched to the elevator. Wynthan shook his head amused at him and nudged her to move. A small smile on her lips she followed her friend who just became more of family than ever before.

#writblr #writing #sin eaters part 9 #sin eaters wip #wynne writes #fantasy #adult audience #post apocalyptic

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frogofalltime · 10 months ago

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day 10

i woke up at 9am and got out of bed immediately. but then i just proceeded to procrastinate for hours and hours. i took my meds and ate breakfast, but then i just went on my phone for hours.

@etherealspacejelly had family visiting and after they had left we talked for a while. i was going to take a shower but i didn't have the energy or motivation to do it. also i felt very insane and like a caged animal. i didn't end up getting into the shower until around 4pm.

showering always is hard for me, and it causes a lot of dysphoria and sensory issues, and i just felt entirely Bad. i didn't want to get dressed but i was also cold and couldn't stand being aware of my body. i put some clothes on but i could feel everything against my skin too much and it was Not Good At All.

meanwhile robin was not doing okay either, which of course was very worrying. and i realised i was feeling really unwell too (dizzy, shaking, and my heart was beating too fast). i had not eaten since the morning and it was now almost 6pm.

i worked up the energy to move, then i did my prayers and went to the kitchen to eat some of the curry and rice i made yesterday.

i read a book for a while and then went on my phone. i got stuck huperfocusing on an instagram page that posts images and obituaries of palestinian martyrs, and every post broke my heart into even smaller shards. i couldn't stop thinking about how many humans have been brutally murdered, how many children and adults are suffering. i am so lucky to not live in a war zone and to be able to access medical care. imagine how different it would be if we had no functioning hospitals here like in gaza. and then i started worrying again thinking about all the people in the world and how everyone is someone's loved one and if i freaked out so much about robin going to the hospital on friday night how much worse it must be for all of these people and i just wanted to break down sobbing.

i eventually tore myself away from my phone and went to the shared house where robin and our friends live with the intention to study for my upcoming exam. i didn't have the energy to tie my shoelaces for some reason and putting on extra layers to go outside felt like so much effort. it was really hard to get myself outside but i am glad i did. however, my rib pain was getting bad again, and i was extremely miserable and depressed, so when i arrived i just curled up on the sofa and tried not to cry.

my friend encouraged me to study even if it was just one lecture. so i finally did that but the wifi was not working so i couldn't do a second one, so i gave up for the night. the others left to go play a game together and i lay on the sofa in the dark with my hand pressed over my eyes because my head was aching and i felt terrible.

then robin came downstairs to wash his dishes and i was so glad that they are alive that i hugged them as tightly as possible and didn't want to let go. it is really silly because it wasn't even a huge thing, robin clearly was not dying, my brain just blows everything out of proportion and i can't bear it when someone i love is even in a little bit of pain, let alone having scary medical issues. one time my best friend was hospitalised and had to have an operation for appendicitis and i convinced myself she wouldn't wake up from the anaesthesia and i was inconsolable for days even though she woke up fine and definitely didn't die. idk why i'm like this.

we hung out for a while and it made me feel better gradually. robin told me about his latest hyperfixation (star trek) and we laughed so hard that we couldn't breathe. my stomach was rumbling a lot so robin encouraged me to eat something. i had a banana and some chocolate with hazelnuts. i felt a little better after that.

then robin went to bed but i didn't feel like walking home just yet, my ribs are still very painful and it hurts to move, so i just lay on the sofa. my heart was beating really fast again and i could hear the blood rushing loudly in my ears and it made me panic and feel overwhelmed. but then my friends finished their game and came down to join me and i calmed down. we watched half of a movie together and then one friend went to bed and the other one played super auto pets while i watched. it was very nice. i love listening to his voice.

finally he decided to go to bed and i went home. it hurt to walk but it was good to be outside. i love being out in the city in the middle of the night when everyone else is asleep and it's just me and the stars and the moon and the rats and the random birds that sing to the street lamps thinking they're the sun.

i got home, and suddenly i had some random energy and started like. stim dancing in silence to a song i had stuck in my head ?? but it hurt too much so i stopped and got ready for bed instead, and now i am hopefully about to fall asleep.

idk how to describe today other than mostly wasting hours and hours of time and feeling utterly and completely insane. idk if it's just the stressful situation recently or if the meds are making my eating issues, depression, and anxiety worse. but i really don't feel like myself and i think robin is having this problem too. i hope it goes away as our bodies adjust.

#medicated binya #audhd #adhd #adhd meds #adhd medication

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robbiemd · 2 years ago

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The Crypto-birthday Excitation

I received three birthday cakes yesterday. Well, actually dapat four but the nurses weren't able to get me one before the stores closed. One was delivered at the ER and it came from my Papa and Mama. The next one was from MiHoyo. It wasn't a surprise, really, because I saw Ejii-chan also got one on her birthday last November. Lastly, before the day ended, some nurses and med techs knocked on our lounge to send a mango graham cake.

The day started with two mortalities in the ER. One adult who was severely dehydrated terminally succumbing to hypovolemic shock. The other one was a baby who was born breech outside our institution. He was dead upon arrival. Despite efforts to resuscitate, the newborn sadly didn't make it.

"Baka offering 'yung mga souls nila to celebrate a Dark Lord's birthday." Someone said.

"Gagi. Pero baka nga, ano?"

The rest of the day went smoothly. It's like the patients knew that they shouldn't come to the hospital today. Afternoon came and I had a little pakain inside the conf room and invited every living skeletal workforce on duty yesterday. I was lucky that my birthday this year landed on a Sunday hehe.

And look, there's my nephew, too, trying to greet me a Merry Christmas and a Happy Birthday! I can't think of anything to give him yet for Christmas. Any idea?

5 December 2022 EN, PH

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awalnutshell · 5 months ago

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June 18th

tuesday

Paul payed all my bills this morning. i am embarrassed and wish i had my own money, but im grateful he's so willing to help, so willing to take care of me. i am lucky, paul is determined to prevent me from calling my father for help. paul knows i would have to grovel and beg for a couple hundred dollars from that man. he knows any amonut of money would come with a list of terms and conditions, i would be in debt, both financially and emotionally, to my father.

i got my period early, on sunday, a week before the full moon. it arrived prematurely, heavy and more painful than usual. i spent the past two days convalescing in our bedroom, eating strawberry ice cream and crying.

last night i finally picked myself up and threw out the rotting flowers by my bedside, preserving what i could to hang and dry in our dark hallway. i did the dishes and cleaned the vomit off the toilet, i was bulimic all week. i scrubbed the pink mold off the walls of the shower and soaked the curtain in bleach and vinegar overnight. our super will come next monday to re-grout the tiles and change out the bath faucets.

if nothing else, i am writing. i fixed my film camera and am photographing beautiful things. i am pursuing potential clients. this evening i'll go back to Anything and see if i can convince them to hire me. i would like to lay out this afternoon, get a bit sunkissed if i can.

last night we fell asleep early, no later than nine or so. we cried and held each other and cried some more. we curled up together, my head on his chest, and fell asleep immediately.

we woke up at 4 am and then again at 9, cranky and smelly and too hot. but the day has righted itself for the most part by now. i missed my meds the past two days and am grateful to be back on them now.

i spoke to mum yesterday and she told me to focus on the good, hold only the positive in my mind. she's right, i am too cynical. she said to put all the past behind me and focus solely on the beautiful future ahead, to picture only possibility and prosperity. she told me to go to church and pray, and she's right about that too.

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jamespotterthefirst · 3 years ago

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As It Was (1/6)

Chapter 1: The Doctor

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Lilac Allende) Word count: 1.4K Warning: None Series: As It Was (aka Lilac’s Exes)

Series Premise: All the times Ethan meets her exes throughout the years. Chapter Premise: After their win against Declan Nash in Miami, they run into someone from her past.

Context: Lilac dated Noah Burke in Med school but broke up since they mutually decided they were better as friends. His FC is Sebastian Stan. (Exes | Exes Timeline)

Year 1: Miami

The delicate gradient from orange to glittering violet of the Miami dusk was almost the most beautiful thing Ethan had ever seen. Its triumphant rival stood before him, cheeks flushed with color from the night’s excitement, eyes the loveliest shade of emerald. The thrill of their victory against Nash, however small, hummed between them, like the aftershock of iron bells.

“We need a celebratory drink,” she informed him, her hand falling atop his forearm. It was a small gesture, but his heart leapt to his throat, obnoxious and beyond his control.

“Fine,” he agreed, her soft fingers burning through the fabric of his tuxedo jacket. “But no champagne.”

Lilac made a show of pouting and his eyes caught on those delectable, rosy lips.

“Fine. No scotch,” she countered.

Ethan almost smiled as he detached himself from her side. The skin of his forearm pickled with every step that separated them, already missing Lilac's touch, a fact that should have concerned him. The bar by the glittering pool was unsurprisingly crowded with masses of overworked health-care professionals intent on taking advantage of the open bar.

As he waited impatiently for his turn to order, his eyes searched the elegant crowd for her. He found her at once, standing by the poker tables and glancing curiously at the ongoing games. Nothing in her demeanor indicated that she was aware of the interested glances she easily earned from many of the attendees. In that sinful, midnight blue dress—glittering with the same allure of the sky—she was unlike anything Ethan had ever beheld.

As if aware of his eyes on her, Lilac glanced at him, giving him a playful smile.

“No scotch,” she mouthed in a way he found entirely too attractive.

Attractive?

He had to get a grip.

In the end, the wait at the bar proved to be insufferable. Without much ceremony, he swiped a bottle of acceptable red wine from nearby, justifying this choice by the fact that all drinks are free anyway.

With a self-satisfied grin, he made his way back, already imagining Lilac's taunts about his petty theft. But when arrived at the poker tables, he discovered Lilac was no longer alone. A dark-haired man clad in a tailored, gray suit leaned casually against a nearby wall. His jovial, blue eyes were solely on Lilac, his mouth curved into a half smirk that bordered on flirtatious.

“...Heard you placed at Edenbrook.”

“I did! I was lucky.”

The familiarity in their tones left no doubt that they knew each other.

“Nah, you were the best in that cohort. Everyone knows it. You earned that.”

A genuine blush lit up her beautiful face. Inexplicably, something unpleasant twisted in Ethan's stomach as he watched. He realized, belatedly, it was envy at the ease with which this man offered Lilac praise.

“So what's it like to work with Ethan Ramsey? I remember you used to worship that guy.”

“Shut up,” she laughed, shoving his arm.

“It's true! You almost killed me when I nearly spilled coffee over your second copy of his book!”

“It was my only copy, you jerk.”

“Ah, yes. I remember the annotations and post-its as if it were yesterday.”

“They're still there.”

“I don't doubt it. It was cute.”

Another rosy blush from Lilac and another unpleasant clench of Ethan's stomach. Cute was an absurd way to describe someone like Lilac Allende. It was almost insulting.

“Did you get that thing signed now that you work with him?”

Lilac scrunched her nose. “Kind of?”

This gave Ethan pause. He distinctly remembered signing that book for her on her first day. It was easy for Ethan to recall this since it was the first and only autograph he ever gave.

Lilac's strange response didn't seem to faze her companion. Instead, he grinned down at her with exuberant charm. Ethan almost rolled his eyes.

“I heard a rumor he's here.”

“What? You're hoping he notices you, Burke?”

“You think he will?” the other returned sarcastically. With a flourish, he gestured at his suit. “I wore my Sunday best hoping he would.”

Lilac laughed again. “You haven't changed a bit.”

A devilish smirk appeared on his face, paired with a nonchalant shrug.

“So how did you score an invite to this thing?”

“I actually—”

“She's here with me,” Ethan supplied, effectively making his presence known. “Doctor Allende is the top intern at our hospital and earned an invite.”

Burke's eyes widened comically and he straightened at once. For a wild moment, Ethan wondered if the young doctor would salute him. To everyone's relief, he didn't.

Lilac, for her part, blushed bright red. A small wave of satisfaction rolled in Ethan's stomach. Perhaps he was decent at praising her, too.

“Doctor Ramsey, this is Doctor Noah Burke,” Lilac said. “Noah, this is Doctor Ethan Ramsey.”

The young doctor's grip was firm as they shook hands, despite looking like a fish out of water. It took Burke a few more beats to fully recover, blinking away his surprise. He managed a smile for Ethan, though nowhere near as charming as the one he had cast on Lilac only minutes ago.

“Lilac and I were at med school together,” Burke explained. “She introduced me to your work.”

Lilac sent him a warning look.

“Is that so? Did Doctor Allende know my work extensively back then? Or did she only say that on her first day to kiss up to me?”

Her eyes widened as big as saucers and Ethan resisted the urge to laugh. Mouth slightly agape, as though she couldn't believe her ears, she glanced between the two men. Burke's responding guffaw of laughter should have clued her in on what she was about to endure.

“Believe me, she knew your work like the palm of her hand. She talked about your research like it was gospel,” Burke proclaimed, ignoring Lilac's skewering glare. “I'm talking post-it notes on almost every page of your book and printed stacks of your journal articles. One night, she canceled our date because she was wrapped up in finding an obscure paper you wrote.”

Ethan ignored the way his stomach clenched at the word “date”. Instead, he zeroed in on Lilac's forced smile, looking far too adorable for someone that was silently praying for the ground to devour her. Face almost scarlet now, she avoided his gaze.

“Lilac here is tenacious and when she sets her mind to something, she never gives up. So she found it. It took her weeks but she found it.”

“My undergrad thesis,” Ethan commented, looking at Lilac. She still would not look at him.

“That's the one,” Burke confirmed with a chuckle. “I'm happy she made her dream of working with you come true.”

Burke looked as though he wanted to add more, but a group of young doctors nearby called his name, urging him to join them on the dancefloor. They were a cheery group, bright faced and no doubt intoxicated. Burke waved at them and then turned to Ethan and Lilac with a sheepish smile.

“Duty calls,” he said. “Do you want to join us?”

Ethan opened his mouth, already summoning a polite way to refuse. Lilac, however, beat him to the punch.

“That sounds like fun but we have to head back,” she said. “We have plans.”

The last addition sounded intimate, or perhaps it was Ethan's idiotic, besotted brain. Burke did not appear to find anything strange with that because he nodded and started saying his goodbyes. The young doctor shook Ethan's hand, embraced Lilac, and made his way to his friends.

Once alone, they began walking back into the hotel, a tense silence between them. He noticed the endearing blush still glowed on her face. Ethan chuckled.

“Gospel, huh?”

“Quiet,” she admonished.

More silence.

“You dated that guy?” Ethan asked minutes later when the doors to the elevator opened.

“Yes,” she replied. “Why?”

“I didn't know party frat boy was your type.”

“It's not usually but I like a guy who can make me laugh,” she explained. Then, meeting his eyes in the mirror on the wall, she added, “Plus, I'm a sucker for pretty eyes.”

Ethan's breath hitched quietly.

“Now stop judging me with those eyes of yours or I'll report you for stealing.”

“No one will ever believe you,” he returned without missing a beat.

“You're right. Everyone knows you're too boring and old to swipe a bottle of wine.”

“It's the perfect crime.”

To accentuate that, he effortlessly twirled the bottle in his hand, catching it with ease. Lilac watched with an impressed arched brow. Unable to contain it any longer, she laughed.

Author’s Note: I hope you liked this! I hope to update this every few weeks.

Also, YBF will be back next week! The next two chapters are almost done.

Thank you so much for indulging me on this crazy journey! Love you all!

#open heart #ethan ramsey #ethan x mc #playchoices

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multifandomimagines · 3 years ago

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Let Me Show You - A Theo Raeken Imagine

Characters: Theo Raeken x Reader

Word Count: 3469

Summary: Reader is feeling stressed and insecure, so Theo wants to be there for her and make her feel perfect.

Warnings: Smut (female-receiving oral and vaginal), insecurity, mentions of IED

Written by: Josie

A/N: Keep reading after the cut 👀

Disclaimer: GIF isn’t ours - credit to who it belongs to

Y/N sighed as the puffy red eyes of her reflection stared back at her through the mirror. This week had been… different. Every little thing had been going wrong, and each day brought more and more emotion, stress and insecurity. Her under-eyes were dark with exhaustion and her smile wasn’t as bright as it usually was - that is, when it showed itself anyway.

She didn’t even hear when her bedroom door opened and closed softly, didn’t register the light footsteps across her carpet moving toward her; not until the eyes of her boyfriend met hers in the mirror, round with concern. Seeing him so suddenly would usually have elicited a wide grin from Y/N, and she would jump into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist. Yet, in the state she was in, his arrival made her feel as if she could finally let it all out. Her emotions overwhelmed her like a tidal wave, and her eyes prickled with tears.

“Theo,” she whispered, her voice cracking, and hurriedly turned around to bury her head in his neck. Almost like a reflex, Theo held her tightly to his chest as she cried, his hand rubbing up and down her trembling back. He slowly walked them backward until his legs hit the edge of her bed, and pulled her shaking body onto his lap.

“Shh, baby,” Theo hushed her sobs tenderly. “It’s okay.” Her head had made its way back to his neck, Y/N couldn’t even look up at him. He wouldn’t show it, because he had to be strong for her, but seeing his girl like this broke him to pieces inside. She was the only person who saw the good in him when everyone else tossed him aside as either a failure or a villain. Either way, he was a lost cause in the eyes of most people. Everyone really… well, everyone except her. Out of all of the people Theo had met in his life, he knew Y/N deserved to be happy more than anyone. She deserved to be cared for, celebrated, loved. As someone who dragged him out of his darkest places, Theo wanted nothing more than to help her out of hers.

Y/N sniffled, and slowly lifted her head from Theo’s shoulder, her eyes staring downward and avoiding the gaze of her boyfriend. She knew it hurt him to see her like this and she wished she could just… stop.

“Hey,” she heard him say. “Look at me Y/N.” His voice was rich with worry for the girl he loved, and she flinched at the thought of causing him grief. It was quick, but Theo saw it, and his heart snapped once again. Slowly, he raised his hand to her cheek, running his thumb along her cheekbone softly, collecting the tears that were slowly drying on her face. She subtly leaned into his touch without even realising she did it, it was like her body moved off it’s own accord, drawn to him. Gently, Theo moved his hand to Y/N’s chin and turned her head to face him.

For the first time since he’d arrived, Y/N finally let Theo see the pain in her eyes. They were glossy and slightly bloodshot, and Theo’s gaze softened at the sight of her vulnerability. “What’s wrong?” He asked a simply question, not wanting to overwhelm her.

“Everything,” she breathed. Theo’s fingers ran themselves through her hair, encouraging her to keep going. Initially she wanted to shrug him off and succumb to her feelings again, but she let him comfort her. “I’m just feeling everything all at once. Theo, I can’t-“

“It’s okay baby, it’s okay,” He held her cheeks delicately, scared to break her fragile form. “Breathe with me.”

It was something Theo had learned over the months. Sometimes Y/N really needed to calm down and just breathe slowly, in and out, exhaling the intensity of her feelings as much as her brain would allow. Though she hadn’t admitted it, Y/N realised that the method worked better when Theo led her through it.

After a minute or so of long, deep breaths, Y/N was no longer jolting with the ghosts of sobs from earlier. Theo continued to hold her close, remaining gentle but tight enough to always remind her that he was there for her. No matter what.

“This week has been so bad,” She began, and Theo stayed silent, realising that she was finally feeling comfortable enough to talk. He felt a small surge of pride flow through him at this, knowing that it was hard for her at times. “I’m stressed. I still have so much work to do, and deadlines are creeping up on me like a freakin’ predator. I’m worried for my brother, he’s struggling with his IED and he’s even been taking his meds, but they keep needing to up the dose and it kills me to see him in the state he gets. I keep screwing up too, like earlier I kept stalling the car, and I broke a photo frame yesterday morning, and I forgot to submit an assignment for grading at the beginning of the week. And I can’t sleep at night… Theo, I’m so tired.”

“Hey, come here,” Theo whispered, pulling her into another hug. “Okay, first of all, you are so smart and every time you get stressed about an assessment, you always go and smash it, don’t you?”

A smile threatened to pull at her lips at his confidence in her, and she nodded.

“Right,” Theo grinned. “Next thing, Liam is resilient, just like you. He won’t let one little setback get him down, and his meds will be sorted before you know it. Plus, he’s lucky to have you as a sister, you know that? You’re always there for him, everyone sees it.”

Y/N shifted on Theo’s lap, looking into his eyes as he spoke. “And,” He continued. “Everyone has weeks where they feel like they mess everything up, even super cool badasses like me.” Y/N giggled, spurring Theo on. “Someone as perfect as you doesn’t need to worry about a few little mistakes. They’re nothing, okay? Not important.” His hand moved soothingly up and down her arm, leaving goosebumps in their wake. “Is that everything?”

“Um, yeah…” Y/N trailed off quietly, suddenly avoiding her boyfriend’s eyes and sinking into herself. Theo knew her so well at this point that not a single subtle movement would go unnoticed, so he raised his eyebrows at her response. He knew she was holding back, and she knew that he knew. Sighing, Y/N gave in a little. “It’s stupid.”

“What have I always told you?” He said, smiling at her. “You can tell me anything. Anything at all. I’ll be there for you no matter what. You know that, don’t you?”

Y/N nodded and breathed in, slightly shakily. “I feel ugly, Theo.”

“What?” Theo whispered in disbelief, his eyes the size of saucers. He didn’t know what he’d expected, but it wasn’t that. “Baby-“

“I told you it was stupid-“

“No, it’s not that, it’s just-“ Theo searched for the words in his brain. He never thought he’d have to convince the most beautiful girl in the world that that’s what she was. He thought it was just common knowledge, really. “You and ‘ugly’ would never even fit in the same category. Not even in the same universe.”

“That’s just not true though,” Y/N stated, shaking her head, her eyes tired. “I can’t even look in the mirror at the moment. I feel like when I look, I’m not looking back at me. And it makes me cry. I’d rather not see myself at all than to look at that reflection.”

If Theo’s heart wasn’t broken before, the damage was definitely done now. Hearing Y/N, his girl, say that she wasn’t pretty, but ugly, made him feel all kinds of lost and confused, but more so sad, because he wished he could take away her pain and make it all disappear. Unfortunately, his powers of pain transference only worked on physical pain, and he silently cursed that fact.

“How can you not see what I see…” He whispered, almost more to himself than to her. “You know, the first time I saw you Y/N, even from a distance I knew I’d never see anyone as beautiful as you. And now I’m looking at you, months later, and I still think you’re just as stunning. You are gorgeous. You hear me? The most gorgeous ever.” Theo placed kisses on her nose, her cheeks, her forehead as he spoke, causing Y/N’s heart to flutter. His words stirred something in her, and the intensity of his eyes boring into hers made her forget about everything she was worried about. A wave of adoration for her boyfriend washed over her, and she cupped his cheeks delicately, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips.

Y/N didn’t have the words at that moment, all the emotion was caught in her throat, so she did what she felt conveyed her feelings best. She leaned forward and kissed him, Theo’s lips moving against hers immediately, as if by instinct. It was so soft, so pure, light as a feather. She pulled away from him all too soon, their eyes meeting each other once again, but Theo didn’t feel like stopping. “I want to show you how beautiful you really are,” He spoke lowly, holding her hand and giving a gentle squeeze. “Please baby. Let me show you.”

He didn’t have to explicitly say what he really meant by that for both of them to know, and his request sent warm shivers through her body. She spoke only one word: “Okay.”

Theo connected their lips again, harder this time. Even with just a kiss, he wanted to pour every ounce of love he had for her in it. He would make sure that he made her feel exactly how she deserves to feel. Her hands had moved to the back of his neck, plucking at the hairs on his head, while Theo held her as close as their bodies would allow.

His fingers slid up her t-shirt slightly, brushing the skin underneath. Theo’s fingers were so cold that Y/N gasped against his lips, so her boyfriend took the chance to slip his tongue into her mouth and explore. Slowly, he lifted her shirt up further and further until they were forced to pull away so Theo could tug it over her head and toss it on her bedroom floor.

Of course, Theo wanted to marvel her brilliance as best he could, so he gripped her by the waist and moved her carefully so she was laying flat on her bed, looking up at him. “So beautiful,” he murmured, and waisted no time in resuming their kiss. His hands travelled down her sides as their lips moved in sync like a perfectly choreographed dance, and his hips ground into hers - gently still, yet hard enough to give Y/N friction where she needed it the most.

He dragged his lips to her neck, sucking and biting on the skin to create dark marks to decorate her already perfect body. Theo considered it his finishing touch to her, as he knew she needed him as much as he needed her, which was what made them so perfect. Y/N’s hands roamed his back, one leg secured over his hip to keep him close, and Theo reached around to unclip her bra. His eyes widened - he would never get used to seeing her body like this, and she wasn’t even fully exposed to him yet.

“I love these so much,” He said, lowering his head to one breast and closing his mouth over her nipple, his tongue sliding across her sensitive skin. Y/N moaned as he simultaneously kneaded her other breast with his hand. “I love this one,” He said, moving away from the one he was playing with. “And I love this one.” Theo reattached his lips to her other breast, her rapidly increasing breaths spurring him on.

Y/N’s hips involuntarily bucked up at Theo’s, and he chuckled lightly against her skin at the movement. He trailed his lips back up to her collarbone, her neck, her jaw, all while dragging her leggings and her panties down her legs as far as he could. He pulled away from Y/N’s lips to crawl down the bed until he could completely reveal her entire body. Her leggings and panties discarded on the floor, Theo looked his girl in the eyes as he placed his hands on her thighs and lightly encouraged her legs apart.

Shivering with anticipation, Y/N watched her boyfriend wide-eyed as he licked one long stripe up her centre. Her eyelids fluttered, but she couldn’t bring herself to break the intense eye contact she held with Theo, until he began to flick his tongue against her clit. Her head fell back onto her pillow, arms flying down to grab onto Theo’s hair, feeling his head moving between her legs. She moaned as he licked and sucked at her clit, doing everything in his power to make her feel good, and it was music to his ears. He soon replaced his tongue with his fingers, rubbing her clit quickly, and started licking along her core, like it was his whole life’s purpose to do so.

“Fuck, Theo,” She whimpered, and Theo groaned against her at the sound of her saying his name in such a situation. Her voice held so much vulnerability yet so much excitement, so much feeling, so much love. The vibrations against her core sent waves of pleasure racing through her, and Theo watched through his eyelashes as her back arched off the bed.

Theo removed his mouth from her core, and her head whipped up briefly at the loss of contact, her eyes wide and pleading for something, anything. Barely moment after, Theo pushed two fingers inside her, pumping them at a quick pace. Y/N moaned louder, and Theo pulled himself up so his head was level with hers, staring directly into her eyes as his fingers worked their magic. “How good does this feel Princess?”

“So good,” Y/N breathed, barely being able to find it in herself to speak. She gripped onto his biceps as he continued his work between her legs, moaning with every thrust of his fingers. “It feels amazing.”

Theo smirked slightly, content that he was getting exactly the reaction from her that he set out to get, and leaned down to capture her lips with his once again. He added another finger and picked up the pace of his actions, his mouth drowning her voice as she cried out. He kissed her hard, drawing the breath out of her almost completely, and she could taste herself on his tongue which only brought her closer to the edge.

Feeling her walls clench around his fingers, Theo moved his lips around to her ear. “Are you gonna cum?” He said, his voice rough with his own arousal. He knew the answer, but he also knew that Y/N loved to hear his voice, and it somehow turned her on even more. All she could do at this point was nod frantically, her moans and whimpers making it impossible to get the words out. Theo sped up his actions even further, trying with everything he had to send her over the edge. “Cum for me baby.”

The words uttered into her ear sent her into ecstasy, and she let go screaming Theo’s name. He watched with his mouth hung open as her body pulsed and jolted as her orgasm washed over her in waves, her cries slowing into whimpers and her contorted face relaxing into one of sheer bliss.

A few moments later when Y/N had caught her breath, she reached down and palmed Theo’s bulge through his joggers, eyes widening when she realised how hard he already was. He groaned, dropping his head to her shoulder and tensing at her touch. “N- no, baby,” He stuttered out, voice rough from the feeling. Y/N was confused as he slowly moved her hand away, tilting her head to the side in a silent question. “Tonight is about you.”

Usually she would protest and say that they both need to be pleasured equally, but she wanted him so badly that she didn’t have it in her to argue. Frantically, she yanked his head down and smashed her lips against his, tongue and teeth clashing in desperation. All she wanted was him, and she didn’t want to wait any longer.

She pulled his shirt up his body, almost ripping the fabric with her speed, and he pulled away so she could pull it over his head. She loved to admire Theo’s toned chest and stomach, so she reached her hand down to feel up his abs. She tried to look, but Theo was adamant on her being the one who was worshipped, so he dipped his head and began sucking on her neck once again, causing her head to fall back and a moan to fall from her lips.

As he painted her neck with purple bruises, Y/N reached down and played with the waistband of his joggers, fiddling with the drawstrings. Theo felt her fingers brush him and growled against her neck, hurriedly standing up to yank them and his boxers to the ground, completely exposed before her.

Y/N whimpered at the sight of him, naked and ready for her, and he crawled back over her just as quickly as he’d stood up. Theo looked at her with dark eyes, wordlessly asking for permission to treat her to just what she deserved. “Please, Theo,” She whispered, and of course, Theo didn’t want to deny her anything she wanted, especially when she asked so nicely.

The two of them moaned in harmony, jaws dropped open, as Theo pushed himself inside her, easily sliding in due to her wetness. He moved all the way in until he felt like he was inside Y/N’s stomach, pausing there as they both breathed heavily from the sensation. “Feeling better?” Theo spoke thinly, smiling at his girlfriend’s expression of pure pleasure.

“Miles better,” She replied, thrusting her hips up at Theo, making it known that she wanted more. The chimera began to move, pushing in and out of her at an ever-increasing pace, making sure she felt every single inch of him to give her the best sex possible. Y/N hands roamed his back, nails scratching at it and breaking the skin as she moaned and cursed into his ear.

“Always so tight and wet for me,” Theo groaned, his hair falling messily over his forehead as he moved. “So perfect. Every inch of you is perfect.” He sped up his movements, making sure to hit the spot that gets her screaming, and grabbed at her breast with one hand and delicately stroking her cheek with the other. “I love you.”

Theo was going so deep and fast now, Y/N was so close. Her nails dug into his back as her release approached, unable to tear her eyes away from his as they glowed yellow from the adrenaline. “I love you too,” She spoke shakily, so nearly there, when Theo kissed her hard, knowing she was reaching her orgasm from her clenching walls.

“Now,” He spoke against her lips, and as soon as the word had left his lips, Y/N screamed out Theo’s name at the most euphoric feeling she had ever experienced, shaking and quivering around him. Moments later, as she was still feeling the high, she felt Theo slow his movements as he spilled into her, his own release washing through him like a tidal wave.

After coming down from their high, Theo flopped down next to her in bed, immediately pulling her close to rest her head on his chest, which was still rising and falling. He kissed her head lightly, stroking her hair affectionately, and then pulled the covers over their bodies. He knew Y/N was exhausted, not just from their activities but from her whole week. Her breathing had slowed and he realised she had already fallen into a relaxed slumber.

Theo smiled to himself - seeing his girl finally calm with no stress lines pulling at her face made his heart soar. He hated seeing her so upset, in fact it was his least favourite thing to see in the world, so he vowed to always be the one to lift her back up again.

Theo would always be there for her: rain or shine, any day, any time. And one day it’ll be ‘til death do them part. His smile lingered on his lips as he let his own eyelids closed and he joined her in her slumber, meeting her in her dream.

#teen wolf #teen wolf imagines #teen wolf imagine #theo raeken #theo raeken imagines #theo raeken imagine #teen wolf smut #theo raeken smut #theo raeken x reader #cody christian

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sarcasmandships · 4 years ago

Text

how to save a life ︱spencer reid

word count: 8.3k

spencer reid x slight oc

spencer and veronica argue over him keeping their relationship from the team, but when spencer sustains a life-threatening gun shot wound it puts everything into perspective

angst + hurt/comfort with an eventual happy ending

this is not an x reader because i hate writing y/n in place of a character name and it often forces you into writing in second person which i also hate - however I have avoided giving specific descriptions of hair/eye/skin colour, height and body shape so feel free to imagine it like an x reader

this is also heavily inspired by greys anatomy and ive taken characters from the show to be side characters, however you do not need to have watched a single episode of greys to follow the story

warnings: mention of rape, mentions of past drug use, spencer being shot, descriptions of blood, spencer being a bit of a dick in part 1??

Veronica groaned and rolled onto her stomach, shielding her eyes from the dull light illuminating the room. Her body was stiff as she twisted to find a more comfortable position, but the glare from the lamp was still too bright, so she huffed and forced herself to sit upright.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” Spencer whispered.

Veronica was still groggy and had to squint her eyes to focus on him. He was stood on the other side of her bedroom, half dressed in a pair of tight grey trousers and an unbuttoned pale blue shirt. Her eyes raked over his exposed skin.

She grumbled and flopped back down on the bed, “you’re lucky you’re pretty, waking me up at 5am on a Saturday.”

He frowned, “it’s an emergency – we just got called in on a case.”

“Is this your way of telling me you can’t come tonight?” she snorted, looking up at him lazily as her head rested on her pillow.

“The fundraising gala – right,” he said stiffly, slowly doing up his buttons, “it’s a local one, so we won’t be flying out, but I can’t justify sneaking off to a party while we’re working a case.”

“Its not a party,” Veronica said through gritted teeth, “parties are fun. This is a stupid campaign that Jackson organized to raise funds for the hospital. Where I’m expected to go and charm rich, old, white men into giving us money, and whichever department raises the most money gets a bonus-”

“And you think I’d have been a valuable addition to your efforts because?” Spencer asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Because, you have an eidetic memory and an IQ of 187 – that impresses everyone, and maybe it could’ve impressed some hedge fund manager enough to give me, and my department, the big bucks.”

“You flatter me.”

“Yeah, remember this feeling – cos’ you won’t be getting any more nice words from me for a while,” Veronica grumbled into her pillow; she pulled the duvet tighter around her body and screwed her eyes shut, they still hadn’t adjusted to the glow from the lamp.

Spencer had finished getting dressed, and he sighed deeply as he crept over to the bed. He crawled on top of the duvet and wrapped his arms around Veronica’s body.

“You know I would rather be with you, but if I don’t go to work, people die,” he whispered in her ear.

Veronica twisted her torso to face him, “Spencer I get it – if I don’t go to work people die too, I just hate your job when it means we can’t do things together. That gala just going to be full of dull, sleazy men – you would’ve kept me sane.”

He wrapped his arms around her, tighter, “I know, I hate it too. I just can’t leave in the middle of a serial case like this, plus even if I tried to the team would have too many questions because-”

Veronica’s body stiffened, and she unconsciously shifted away from him, “because you still haven’t told them about us, even though we’ve been together for years, and you know all my friends, and we go to work events together for my job. But we can’t for yours because you still haven’t told your team, who you consider family. I’m well aware of that fact, Spencer.”

“Veronica, you know it’s nothing to do with you. There are just some things I like to keep private from them-”

“I’m not a thing! I’m a person, and you’re not keeping it private, you’re keeping it secret. Private would be if they knew I existed but didn’t know all the details of our relationship, but that’s not what’s happening here,” she snapped.

“V, don’t be like that-”

“You should just go; you’ll be late for work. Wouldn’t want to let down your team like that.”

Spencer sighed and let go of her, he shuffled around the room gathering up his bag and coat before heading to the door.

“Goodbye, good luck at the fundraiser. Hopefully I’ll be home tonight, otherwise I’ll call you, okay?”

“Yeah, okay,” she grumbled.

“I love you,” he said uncertainly.

Veronica couldn’t fight the smile that crept onto her face at his words, “I love you too,” she whispered back.

She stretched her arms out to Spencer’s side of the bed as she heard the front door click shut. The pillow and mattress were already cool from the absence of his body, Veronica let her heavy eyes fall shut and drifted off to sleep again.

She didn’t wake up again until hours later, when the sunlight crept through the gaps in the curtains and shone onto her face. Veronica unwilling pried her eyes open for the second time that day and fumbled for her phone on the bedside table to see if Spencer had texted her.

He hadn’t. Veronica’s heart sunk and her chest, he always texted her when he arrived at work. The only thing the glaring, bright screen of her phone informed her was that it was 11.57am, she had significantly overslept.

She quickly attributed it to the 17-hour spinal-cord tumour resection she had worked on yesterday and pulling the charger out of her phone she rolled over. Unlocking her phone, she sent a quick text to Spencer, reminding him that he needed to keep her updated when he was on a case or she’d assume he was dead.

But when she clicked ‘delivered’, there was a buzz from Spencer’s bedside table and Veronica strained her neck only to see that his phone was still there. She frowned, Spencer wasn’t a fan of his phone, but he never went to work without it, could he really have been so flustered from their spat that he’d forgotten it?

Whatever the reason, Veronica groaned, she wouldn’t relax all day without his periodic updates telling her that he was still alive, and she doubted he would trek all the way back to her apartment to get it.

She crawled out of bed and searched around for the first clothes she could find; a pair of dark running shorts, and her red ‘Harvard Med’ sweatshirt. Flinging them on, she quickly sprayed herself with deodorant and grabbed her bag, keys, and Spencer’s phone before dashing out the door.

Veronica cursed Spencer as she thudded down the stairs of her apartment building, because of course, the lift was still broken. Dr. Spencer Reid was supposed to have an eidetic memory, and he forgets his phone? Idiot.

A wave of heat hit her as she stepped outside, rummaging around her bag for a pair of sunglasses to shield her eyes as she made her way over to her car. Veronica contemplated how to get the phone to Spencer as she drove, she obviously couldn’t call him to let him know she had it, and she didn’t have the extension for his desk phone.

She could hand it into someone at reception and ask them to take it up or ask them to call him down. But then she would have to talk to him again and Veronica wasn’t sure if she wanted to do that.

She knew it wasn’t his fault, she knew that he couldn’t control when serial killers decided to act out, she knew that he was out there saving lives.

But it was still frustrating they couldn’t go places like normal couples, if there wasn’t a serial killer terrorising some small town then she was being pulled in on an emergency surgery. If she were honest with herself, she didn’t know how much longer their relationship could go on like this.

At least they were in the same state this time, and they would hopefully get to sleep in the same bed whilst he worked on this case, she thought optimistically to herself as she parked her car on a side street near the FBI building.

Veronica was still debating whether to leave Spencer’s phone with the receptionist or have them call him down as she strolled across the street. But that decision was quickly made for her when she saw Spencer leaving the building, accompanied by a tall, bald man with dark skin and a short blonde woman, wearing an eccentric, neon dress.

They were laughing amongst themselves; Spencer ran a hand through his messy hair as he chuckled at something Veronica was too far away to hear. He looked so happy. She was about to turn around and sneak back to her car when Spencer clocked her, they made eye-contact and he stopped in his tracks.

His friends stopped to and after noticing that Spencer was staring at something, turned to look at her too. The man nudged him, but Spencer stood frozen his tracks. Veronica huffed, if he weren’t going to come to her, she would have to go to him.

“Spencer,” she said, as she approached them briskly.

“Veronica! We’re just going to grab lunch for the team, I…I was going to text you, but I-”

“Left your phone at my apartment,” she finished for him, holding out his phone, which he took gingerly, “hi! I’m Veronica,” she said brightly, turning to face the man and woman who were staring at her, dumbfounded.

“H-hi, I’m Penelope Garcia,” the woman finally spoke.

“Derek Morgan,” the man added, with a small wave.

They both lingered hesitantly a few steps away from Veronica and Spencer, evidently sensing the tension between them. Spencer wouldn’t make eye contact with her, he stared down at his feet, but Veronica stood her ground firmly.

“I’m literally standing right in front of them Spencer, are you still going to try and keep me a secret?” she seethed.

“I-I didn’t want it to happen like this,” he stammered.

“Right. You didn’t want it to happen, at all,” she said, turning on her heel to leave but Spencer lurched forward and grabbed her wrist, pulling her close into him.

“V, please don’t be like that – I wasn’t expecting you to show up at my job like this, I just needed a minute to process-”

“Process what? Your girlfriend doing you a favour? You’ve had a minute, and you clearly don’t want your friends to know me so just forget it Spencer,” she snapped, pulling her arm free from his grip.

“Veronica, please. I will introduce you properly later, just not right now,” he whispered, throwing an anxious glance back at Derek and Garcia.

Veronica rolled her eyes, they weren’t even in earshot anymore and he was still whispering so they wouldn’t overhear.

“Why not right now? You aren’t tracking down an unsub right at this moment, you’re going to get lunch – is a sandwich really more important to you than me?”

“That isn’t what I said!”

“You didn’t have to say anything, Spence,” she smiled sadly, “I don’t understand why you don’t want the people closest to you to know that you’ve had a girlfriend for the past three years. I mean we basically live together, it’s a serious relationship, they should at least know I exist.”

“It’s more complicated than that-”

“No, it isn’t!” she cried, her voice louder and shriller than she intended, causing Derek and Garcia to step forward but Spencer waved them off, “are you embarrassed of me or something?” she asked, her eyes flickering between Spencer’s twisted expression and his friends.

“Of course not, don’t be stupid,” he snorted.

“I’m not being stupid,” she snapped, “but I can’t think of any other reason why you wouldn’t want them to know me. Not that you should have any reason to be embarrassed cos’ I’m a hot neurosurgeon, but maybe that’s not good enough for the sacred BAU,” she spat.

Garcia and Derek whispered amongst themselves as they gave the couple concerned looks.

“Veronica, please-”

“No, don’t,” she said firmly despite the tears burning in her eyes, “you’ve made it very clear where you stand. I have to go; I’m meeting April for lunch and then to get our hair done for this stupid gala. Text me to let me know you’re alive, otherwise don’t contact me,” Veronica turned to leave but Spencer gripped her arm again.

“Are you breaking up with me?” he asked, his voice cracking slightly.

Veronica shook her head, “no, Spencer you could literally stab me through the heart, and I wouldn’t leave you. That’s the problem, I think I love you more than you love me – I just need some space.”

“Come on, I’ll introduce you to Morgan and Garcia, y-you can join us all for lunch,” he said desperately, trying to tug her towards them but Veronica pulled her arm away again.

“Too late Spence,” she sighed, “I meant what I said, still let me know you’re okay every few hours or I’ll worry. But please just leave me alone till you decide if you really want to be in this relationship.”

“Of course, I do Veronica! I lov-”

“Bye Spencer,” she said, kissing him softly on the cheek, “be safe.”

Veronica turned and dashed away from him, desperate not to let him see the tears threatening to spill over.

“Love you…” Spencer finished as he watched her disappear around a corner.

He was frozen for several moments as he stared longingly after her, but she would be in her car and long gone now. He tightened his grip on the phone she had handed him just moments before, the screen lit up and showed a text she must’ve sent before realizing he didn’t have his phone. He shoved the phone back in his pocket and turned on his heel to head back inside, but Derek was quick to grab his arm and pull him back.

“Hey, hey, hey, and just where do you think you’re going?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“Inside,” Spencer snapped, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Derek gave him a pointed look, “I don’t think so kid, I’m gonna tell you what’s gonna happen – we’re gonna get in the car and go pick up lunch for everyone, it’ll take about 20 minutes, tops. That’s how long you have to explain whoever that was and why you’ve been acting so weird this morning, sound good?”

Spencer wrestled his arm out of Derek’ grip, “I don’t owe you an explanation,” he said sharply.

“Well see yeah you do pretty boy, cos’ that’s the second time you’ve snapped at me in under a minute so somethings obviously going on and I’m willing to bet it’s got something to do with Miss Harvard Med, who’s apartment you were in this morning,” he said with a knowing look, “now come on, cars this way,” he pointed to the left on the street and began to saunter off.

Spencer gave Garcia a desperate look, “Penelope, have my back here, I-”

She raised a hand up to silence him, “it doesn’t take a profiler to figure out that you’ve been acting weird all morning,” she shifted closer to him and took his large hand in hers, “I know you like to keep things to yourself Spencer, but you and I also both know that you keeping secrets doesn’t always end well, we aren’t asking you to give us every detail we just want to know what’s going on.”

Spencer huffed but didn’t disagree with her, he even let her tug his arm and lead him down the street after Derek, who was already waiting for them at the car.

“About time,” he said, lifting himself from his position leaning against the dark SVU to unlock it.

He climbed in the front seat and Garcia moved round to get in the passenger’s side, leaving Spencer to stand for a few seconds outside the car. He debated running back to the office for a few seconds, but Derek would definitely run after him, and he was a lot faster. Deciding he didn’t want to be tackled to the ground today, he grumbled and crawled into the back seat, slamming the door behind him.

“You gonna tell us why you’ve got such an attitude today now, kid?” Derek said as he turned the keys in the ignition and pulled away from the kerb.

“And who that girl was?” Garcia added.

“That was Veronica,” he shrugged, twirling the end of his tie in his hands.

“Yeah, she told us that much,” Derek sighed, “we mean who is she?”

“She’s a neurosurgeon at Stafford Grace Mercy West hospital,” he answered through gritted teeth.

“A neurosurgeon!” Garcia gasped, clapping her hands together, “our Doctor Reid found himself a doctor of his own,” she giggled.

“What? No! I just said she was a doctor; I didn’t say there was anything-”

Derek had his eyes focused on the road, but Spencer could picture the look on his face as he spoke, “I didn’t think neurosurgeons usually ran a drop-in clinic from their apartments, but y’know I’m not the one with an IQ of 187, so maybe I’m wrong.”

He gave Garcia a look and her face dropped.

Spencer swore under his breath and folded his arms tightly across his chest. He shifted uncomfortably in the back seat as Derek pulled up to the drive-thru and gave a shrug and a mumble when he asked him what he wanted to eat.

“Thank you very much ma’am,” Derek flirted with the woman in the window as she handed the paper bag of food through to him, he gave it to Garcia as he drove away, allowing her to pick through everyone’s fries.

“Y’know kid, we’ll be back at the office in 10 minutes or so and you can either tell me what’s going on now or back there, in front of everyone else.”

“It’s none of your business!” Spencer spluttered.

“You’ve not been able to focus at work all morning, every time someone has asked a question you’ve been tugging on your tie instead of giving us some long-winded statistic, then some girl we’ve never seen before shows up and you both start fighting-”

“We weren’t fighting,” Spencer grumbled, running a hand through his hair, “just a difference of opinion, that’s all.”

“A difference of opinion made her storm off like that, huh?” Derek mused.

Spencer balled his fists, why couldn’t Derek just leave it alone?

“We just want to make sure there’s nothing bad going on, Spencer,” Garcia said kindly, a handful of Emily’s fries in her mouth.

“Why do you think anything bad would be going on?”

Derek and Garcia exchanged looks.

“Hey! Why are you looking each other like that?”

Garcia twisted in her seat to face him, “we just noticed that recently you’ve not been coming out with us, you’re always rushing home after work, some days you’re really happy – and I love those days! – but other times you’re…irritable-”

“Like today,” Derek interjected.

“Right, and now this girl who just happens to be a doctor with a prescription pad shows up, and if she’s not your girlfriend then-”

“You think she’s my drug dealer?” Spencer snorted.

“Is she?” Garcia asked, alarmed.

“No!” he snapped, “fine! She’s my girlfriend, is that what you wanted to hear? Congratulations guys, you’ve finally gotten me to admit the one thing I didn’t want to tell you, whilst simultaneously accusing me of taking drugs again, and Veronica of abusing her medical license to sell drugs!”

“Hey! Kid I get if you’re upset but don’t raise your voice at Garcia like that, we suspected you were using again before Veronica ever showed up, her being a doctor just fit into the puzzle,” Derek said firmly, “I don’t understand why you didn’t just tell us she was your girlfriend and we could’ve moved on, you being so secretive about her is what made us think that there was something bad going on.”

“Well, there isn’t, except I have a pissed off girlfriend and a serial killer slashing women’s throats open, I don’t have time to pander to your feelings as well,” Spencer grumbled as Derek pulled up near the office again, he flung the door open and high-tailed out of the car, leaving Derek and Garcia in their seats gaping at each other.

He had dashed back inside the building; he couldn’t tell how close Derek and Garcia were behind him, but he was grateful they were far away enough to not catch the lift with him.

“Hey Reid,” Emily greeted him as he sulked back into the office, “where are Garcia and Morgan?”

Spencer shrugged, “they’re coming up now, they’ve got everyone’s food,” he mumbled, shuffling away to his desk.

“Okay…” Emily said, and shot JJ a concerned look.

Spencer sat down and stared blankly at the map in front of him. He was supposed to be working on the geographical profile, but his eyes blurred as he stared at the contour lines and he couldn’t make them refocus.

Derek and Garcia burst through the door minutes later.

“Lunchtime,” he called, as Garcia held the bag up above her head.

“Finally, I’m starving,” Emily groaned, making her way over to Derek to collect her lunch, “what’s going on with the good doctor?” she whispered under her breath, motioning with her head over to Spencer, slumped in his chair.

Derek hesitated, “we’re not entirely sure yet, I’ll let you know when I know,” he whispered back.

Emily nodded apprehensively and took her food from Garcia.

“I promise I didn’t eat all your fries,” she chirped, and Emily rolled her eyes.

The other team members came to collect their orders from Morgan and Garcia, all of them shooting concerned looks at Spencer. He dug his nails into his palms, the sharp twinge distracted him from everyone’s stares.

Spencer didn’t show any intention of coming to get his lunch, so Derek took the bag from Garcia and strolled over to Spencer’s desk. He dropped the bag down on top of the map.

“You wouldn’t answer me when I asked what you wanted, so I picked for you.”

Spencer didn’t look up, “hmm not hungry,” he said, twirling a pen in his hand.

“C’mon kid, I’m sorry Garcia and I implied that you were using again, but we’ve noticed you acting weird for a while and we thought that was the most plausible-”

“So, you thought it was more likely I was shooting myself up with dilaudid than it was that I had a girlfriend? Cos’ who would want to date me right?” he snorted.

“Spencer, you know that’s not what I meant, but you never gave any indication you were seeing someone, I thought if you were then you’d have mentioned it to at least one of us.”

Spencer curled his lip.

“So…why didn’t you mention anything?”

“Because…because we spend so much time together, and you all know so much about me I just wanted to have something that was my own,” he said hastily.

“Okay, I can understand that, so I won’t ask too many questions – I just want to know: does she treat you good? Does she make you happy?”

“Yes,” Spencer murmured.

“That all I’m gonna get, pretty boy?”

Spencer nodded stiffly, “for now.”

“Am I gonna get to meet her?” Derek asked softly.

“You did meet her.”

Derek rolled his eyes, “I mean properly, I would like to introduce myself as the guy who saves your ass on the daily,” he said, nudging Spencer’s shoulder gently.

He tried to fight the smile creeping onto his face, but failed, “you’re getting nowhere near her if you’re gonna lie like that.”

Derek chuckled and held up his hands, “okay, okay I get it – pretty boy’s gotta protect his reputation in front of his girl.”

Spencer gave him a tight-lipped smile and nodded, he continued to twirl the pen in his hand, “something like that.”

“Guys, I think we might have something,” Hotch said, stepping out of the conference room with Garcia and Rossi close behind him.

JJ and Emily nodded, standing up from their desks to join him. Derek moved to follow but Spencer grabbed his arm quickly.

“You won’t say anything will you?” he asked nervously, “not until I’ve had a chance to talk to Veronica, at least. She’s got this fundraising gala for work tonight, and I don’t know when we’ll get home. We’re in the same state and we probably won’t get a chance to talk till this case is over,” he said miserably.

Derek nodded, “your secrets safe with me, pretty boy,” he said, clapping Spencer on the bag before sauntered away and up the stairs.

Spencer smiled, grabbed his lunch from his desk and followed.

***

Veronica drummed her nails against the table as they waited for their waitress to return with their drinks.

“You know I was going to say that it’s a bit early for the wine you just ordered but now I think you should’ve gotten a large,” April commented, watching how Veronica fidgeted in her seat.

“Yeah, well I figured I should start preparing early for this stupid gala,” she mumbled.

“Hey! Jackson has worked really hard organizing this, I think it’ll be fun!”

Veronica rolled her eyes, “you think going to the DMV is fun, so you don’t get much of an opinion here, Kepner.”

“It is fun!” April began but Veronica gave her a pointed look, “right...not about me. Veronica, what’s going on? You’ve been acting weird since you got to my apartment, and I know you’re not looking forward to the gala, but I don’t think that’s what’s on your mind.”

Veronica shrugged, “it’s Spencer, he-”

She was interrupted as their waitress returned, “okay! Diet coke for you, and a pinot griot for you,” she said, placing their respective drinks down in front of them, “are you ladies ready to order?” she chirped, Veronica wanted to roll her eyes at the perkiness radiating off of her, but reminded herself that she was just doing her job.

“I’ll have the chicken Caesar salad please!” April responded, matching the waitresses bright and bubbly demeanour.

Veronica tapped her foot against the floor, “I’ll have the double bacon cheeseburger with Cajun fries please,” she said, giving her best attempt at a smile.

“Excellent!” she said, taking their menus, “I’ll get that out to you soon as its ready.”

“Thank you!” April said, her voice sweet and sing-song-like, until the waitress had disappeared out of sight and she turned to glare at Veronica, “double bacon cheeseburger! You have a tight dress to wear tonight, do you want to be bloated?”

“April, I really don’t care,” Veronica said flatly, taking a large swig of wine from her glass.

April gaped at her lie a fish but quickly composed herself, “what did Spencer do that’s so bad he’s got you comfort eating and drinking?”

Veronica paused to take another gulp of wine before she answered, “it’s not what he did it’s what he didn’t do. First of all, he was supposed to come to the gala with me tonight and keep me from punching one of those rich, old, pervs in the throat but then he got called into work on a case – which sucks, and I’m upset he can’t come but like I can live with that, we get pulled into emergency surgeries all the time, so I get it,” she ranted, taking another sip of wine.

“But?” April prompted.

“But everything comes back to the same issues with us, he refuses to even tell his team about me. And these guys, April, they’re like his family! But they have no clue I even exist; he always says it’s because he’s a private person and he shares so much with them that he just wants to having something to himself…but more and more it just feels like he’s embarrassed by me.”

“Oh, Veronica,” April gushed, her voice dripping with sympathy, “I’m sure that’s not true, but it’s so easy to get in your own head about things like this, when Jackson and I were sneaking around I felt the same way.”

“Yeah, and then you got married,” she snorted.

“And then we got divorced.”

“Is this your way of telling me I should break up with Spencer?” Veronica asked, raising an eyebrow.

“No!” April said quickly, “I’m just saying that Jackson and I didn’t work out because we had too many fundamental differences, but you and Spencer aren’t like that, your problems are coming from external factors and they’re far easier to fix than internal ones. If you gave him an ultimatum, you introduce me to your team or it’s over, then I really doubt that he’s going to let you walk away.”

Veronica shook her head, “he’d know that’s an empty threat, I already told him I would never leave him.”

“When did you tell him that?” April demanded.

“About 20 minutes before I showed up at your place, he left his phone at my apartment, so I went to drop it off at his work but when I got there, he was coming out with two of his friends – I was right in front of them and he still didn’t want to introduce me. And I told him that I couldn’t break up with him, but I thought I love him more than he loves me.”

“And what did he say?”

“Well, then he said I should come to lunch with them, but it was so obvious that he didn’t really want that, he was just trying to cover his own ass,” she shrugged, “so I told him it was too late and then I left.”

“Why didn’t you go with them? Then you would have met them, and this would all be resolved,” April gaped at her.

“Because he didn’t want me there! Besides they don’t even get a proper lunch break, they were just going to pick up food for everyone else. I don’t want to meet my boyfriend’s closest friends in the 20-minute drive to Burger King and back,” she huffed, sitting back lazily, and crossing her arms over her chest.

“Have you tried explaining to him how he’s making you feel by doing this?”

“Only every time we fight, I say I’m sick of him not taking me to parties with his work friends cos’ he doesn’t want them to know about me, but the rest of the team has their partners there, so he just stopped going out with them all together. He would rather not see his friends outside of work than take me with him, you can’t try and tell me that’s not weird.”

April shook her head hesitantly, “no, I agree that its strange, but I’ve also met Spencer and I’ve seen first-hand how much he adores you, whatever is going on, I don’t think it’s because he’s ashamed of you.”

Veronica didn’t answer her. She didn’t have the energy to argue back, if there was another reason as to why Spencer was hiding her, she couldn’t figure it out.

Thankfully, the waitress returned with their food and interrupted April, who Veronica could tell was about to launch into some motivational speech. She took a huge bite from her burger, savouring the salty bacon and tangy tomato relish that made her feel instantaneously better.

April gave her a disapproving look as she delicately tucked into her salad, “I was going to say you need to eat quickly or we’ll miss our appointment, but I see you’re doing that all on your own.”

“We’ve still got another hour, chill out, Kepner.”

April rolled her eyes, “you’ve forgotten the plan, already haven’t you?”

Veronica froze, with a handful of spicy, Cajun fries in her mouth, “plan?” she questioned, her voice muffled.

“I told you yesterday, Veronica!” she whined, “we were going to get our hair done at the salon but now she’s going to come to Cristina’s apartment since its way closer to where the gala will be – so we need to drive back to your apartment to pick up your dress and makeup and then we’ll head to Cristina’s to get ready there.”

“Don’t we need to pick up your stuff too then?”

“No, because I was organized and put mine in the back of the car,” she said with a glare, “you did pick up your dress, right?”

“Yes, have some faith in me,” Veronica grumbled.

“You didn’t remember the plan! You could’ve just as easily forgotten to get a dress.”

“I’m pretty sure you never told me about the plan,” Veronica teased.

“I did!”

“When?”

“Yesterday, after you came out of surgery.”

“You told me after my 17-hour spinal cord tumour resection, and actually expected me to remember a word that you’d said?”

“Shut up and eat your burger,” April huffed, and Veronica chuckled as she took another large bite.

***

Spencer shifted uncomfortably in the passenger’s seat of the SVU, he was irritated. They had been chasing a lead since lunch and it hadn’t panned out, he and Derek were on their way back to the office now.

He turned down the radio; the music was so loud he couldn’t hear himself think. It was getting dark outside now, and the streetlights reflected off of the window he stared out of, the glare hurt his eyes. Spencer re-adjusted his bulletproof vest; it was tight and digging into his chest. He flicked on the AC; the car was too hot.

“Hey kid, you wanna sit still for 5 minutes?” Derek mused.

“I’m just frustrated, I really thought we got him,” he grunted.

“I know me too, but everyone’s doing everything they can to catch him-”

“He’s escalating! He’s raped, killed and dumped two women since lunch, in broad daylight – everyone might be doing everything he can but that isn’t enough.”

“I know this isn’t an easy case, but we’ve dealt with things like this before and you never act out like this, so what’s going on? Is this about your fight with Veronica?”

“No! I mean…” Spencer dragged his hand through his hair, “it’s not about the fight but it is about her, all the women he’s killed so far sort of look like her – same hair and eye colour, same height and body type….”

“Spencer, we know he’s taking these women as surrogates for a Linda Johnson, it doesn’t have anything to do with her-”

“But he could take her, she’s with her friends right now, getting ready for this work thing. The second victim was at a party with friends when he took her, and she looked exactly like Veronica – they could’ve been sisters.”

Derek pulled the car over to the side of the road.

“W-what are you doing?” Spencer stuttered, “Hotch said he wants everyone back ASAP.”

“Hotch can wait,” Derek said sharply, “now listen to me kid, Veronica is gonna be just fine, she’s gonna be at some fancy, little party full of other doctors. We profiled that the unsub wouldn’t be able to blend into an environment like that, that’s why all his other victims were taken in nightclubs or back alleys. She will be fine, okay?”

Spencer didn’t answer.

“Kid, I need you to answer me so I know you’re still in there,” Derek said, nudging him, “I can see that brain of yours going into overdrive.”

“We profiled that the unsub wouldn’t be able to fit in with educated or upper-class groups because of poor social skills and lack of education…” Spencer began slowly.

“Right,” Derek agreed with him.

“And that’s why we went to Tommy Jones’ house, because he fits the profile, but his alibi checks out….”

“What are you getting at here, Reid?”

“It doesn’t make sense, all the women were taken from dive bars or dangerous areas, but they were all also upper class, well educated women – they wouldn’t just go off with someone who they thought was a threat….”

Derek nodded slowly, “…and we know he used some kind of a ruse to get them in his van because all of the victims had minimal defensive wounds.”

“Right, so our unsub would have to be someone these women would trust, and the psychology of implicit bias show that we are consciously and unconsciously more trusting of members of our perceived in-group,” Spencer added, “so what if our unsub is someone connected to Linda Johnson but from the same rich, ivy-league educated background as her.”

“Okay, but we already vetted all of Linda’s male family members, friends and boyfriends of friends – they’re all clear. And she’s still with her high-school boyfriend who’s been in California all week….”

“Call Hotch, Linda should still be at the office, maybe he can find a male from the same financial and educational background as Lisa who has since lost social status and lost touch with her, our unsub could be someone who has lost access to that kind of lifestyle and blames Lisa for it.”

“Okay kid, whatever you say,” Derek said, he grabbed his phone and dialled Hotch’s number, “hey Hotch, Reid thinks the unsub is someone who came from the same background as Lisa but has lost some kind of status and blames her for it, can you ask if anyone fits that description?”

Spencer looked on in anticipation, his heart hammering in his chest. Derek switched his phone to speaker-mode as Hotch came back.

“Morgan, I think we got something. Linda says her high school had a tutoring program, a boy called Phillip Davis used to help her with biology and chemistry, she always suspected he had a bit of a crush on her, but she never returned the feelings. He left the school when his father went bankrupt and he lost all their money, they haven’t spoken in years that’s why she never mentioned him.”

“Linda posted on Facebook that she’d been accepted for a master’s degree in biochemical sciences the day before the killings started, that could be the trigger if Davis feels he helped her enough with her studies to get into a master’s program, but she never showed any appreciation,” Spencer said nodding.

“And if he went to the same private school as Linda, he would have the social skills to fit in with other upper-class women,” Derek said.

“Good work Reid,” Hotch said, “you two are closet to his home address, Garcia’s already sent it to your phones, I’ll meet you there – JJ and Prentiss will check out his work address.”

“You got it Hotch,” Derek said before he hung up the phone and drove off again, “we’re gonna get him kid, don’t you worry.”

Spencer nodded, “I know, just I’ll relax better when he’s in handcuffs.”

“He will be soon.”

Spencer didn’t say anything as Derek raced along side-streets. He had flicked the sirens on as they overtook other cars, and they blared in Spencer’s ears. He switched them off when they pulled up outside Philip Davis’ house, he stared up at the dimly lit house for a second before he followed Derek in exiting the car.

His ears were ringing.

Derek was on the phone again, “yeah Hotch, we just got here.”

Spencer’s heart hammered against his ribcage. He yanked down his bulletproof vest again; it was really uncomfortable.

“Hotch says they’re five minutes out, he wants us to wait until they get here to go in,” Derek said and leant against the exterior of the car.

Spencer nodded but his heart seized in his chest; he didn’t think he could wait five whole minutes outside. He tapped his foot against the uneven concrete and peered up at the house.

A light flicked on in one of the upstairs windows.

“Morgan!” he hissed, “do you see that? He’s definitely in there.”

“I know kid, but Hotch says Lina told him that this guy is really aggressive, and Garcia confirmed he owns a whole arsenal of firearms. He just wants us to have backup before we go in, he’s bringing S.W.A.T as well.”

Spencer huffed, “why does it feel like we’re always just standing around waiting for S.W.A.T to show up?”

“Tell me about it, pretty boy,” Derek grinned, “they wouldn’t know how to be on time if-”

He was interrupted by a piercing scream that came from inside the house, Derek and Spencer instinctively grabbed their guns.

“That was definitely a woman,” Derek whispered, “but he didn’t bring any of the other victims back to his house, why her?”

“We’ve amped up the police presence all over the city and set up roadblocks, maybe he was starting to feel cornered, and didn’t want to be caught in the act – we can’t wait for backup any longer, we have to go in.”

“Yeah, I know,” Derek said, he grabbed his phone from his pocket and sent a quick text to Hotch, “okay kid, lets go,” he nodded at Spencer and began to advance towards the house, his gun held out defensively in front of him.

Spencer took a deep breath and followed him. He really wanted to text Veronica and let her know that he was okay for now, but that he and Derek were about to burst into an unsub’s house. Who apparently happened to a violent, gun fanatic.

Derek had kicked the door down, “Kevin Davis, FBI! Come down with your hands up.”

There was no response.

Derek silently motioned to the stairs and Spencer nodded, he followed as they crept across the hall. Derek looked back at him for approval before he began to slowly climb the stairs, Spencer readjusted his vest again before he followed.

The stairs creaked slightly under their feet; the house was a mess and they carefully stepped over clutter as they made their ascent. Derek had made it safely to the top landing when the first gunshots were fired.

He shouted something but Spencer couldn’t hear him, his voice overshadowed by the pulsing of blood in his ears. He was still stood on the top step; he didn’t have the clear view that Derek had of Kevin Davis emerging from a room with an assault rifle in hand.

Spencer’s ears were stilling ringing from the first round of warning shots.

“Kevin Davis, FBI – put the gun down,” Derek ordered, his own gun firmly fixed at the unsub, who only gave a twisted grin in response.

It all happened so fast.

The unsub was in the doorway to a bedroom when a young, disheveled woman burst out of it and sprinted past him and Derek to reach the staircase.

She was screaming the entire time.

And then the unsub was roaring curses after her.

She reached the top of the stairs where Spencer stood, he reached out a hand to help her, but she recoiled away from his touch and shoved him out of his way.

Derek was yelling something.

But Spencer couldn’t make it out because he was suddenly at the bottom of the stairs, his body ached, and he couldn’t discern the screams from the woman from the sirens in the distance. Or Derek’s words from the unsub’s.

His ears were ringing, and his abdomen hurt.

The vest was digging into his chest again and he gasped for air; why couldn’t he breathe?

He grabbed his gun, which was only a few feet away from him and crawled onto his knees. Every shaky intake of breath left him with a sharp, stabbing pain in his side.

He tugged at his vest again.

Spencer gripped onto the banister of the staircase and used it as a support as he began to pull himself up. He hadn’t even fully unbent his knees when there was another loud gunshot, it echoed around the hall.

After that, everything started spinning and the ground swayed under Spencer’s feet.

There were more muffled yells from upstairs, and the wailing sirens were getting louder.

“The pitch of the sirens…its getting higher,” Spencer mumbled, to no one in particular, “it means they’re getting closer…the Doppler effect…” Spencer gasped for a breath and collapsed to his knees.

He didn’t wince as his kneecaps smashed against the hard tiles.

He couldn’t breathe, the stupid vest.

He was vaguely aware of black shapes moving around him as he lifted his hands to readjust his vest, when he pulled his hand away his fingers were slick with blood.

One of the black shapes was dragging him, away from the stairs.

Kevin Davis was in handcuffs, screaming as he was hauled past Spencer.

“Reid!” a voice called.

Spencer looked around, dazed. He couldn’t figure out where it was coming from.

Someone was taking his vest off, he wanted to thank them, but the words wouldn’t come out.

He looked down at himself, and saw his pale, blue shirt soaked in blood.

Blood.

Spencer didn’t mind it in crime scenes, he had to stare at mutilated corpses all day and didn’t mind their blood.

This was his blood.

Something acidic was rising in his throat.

And something was lifting him, heaving him outside. When the cool air hit Spencer, he felt it more than he had felt the bullet when it tore through his chest.

Derek was hovering over Spencer; he waved a hand in front of his face, but his eyes were still glassy and unfocused. He was laid against the rough concrete; it was uncomfortable, and his spine dug into the hard surface. He could feel that dull ache in his side again.

“Adrenaline…” he choked.

“What are you talking about, kid?” Derek asked frantically.

“Adrenaline, when the sympathetic nervous system is activated adrenaline kicks in and stops you from feeling pain,” he gasped.

“Reid, save your energy okay – now isn’t the time for you to give me a fun science fact,” Derek said with a forced chuckle and sad smile.

Spencer tried to shake his head, but he only succeeded in scrapping his scalp against the tarmac, “I’m telling you…because the adrenaline in my body is wearing off…it hurts,” he whimpered, screwing his eyes shut.

“Spencer! Spencer! You need to stay awake,” Derek was begging, “the ambulance will be here soon, I know it hurts but you gotta stay awake for a bit longer.”

Spencer managed to muster up the strength to speak, “Derek?”

“I’m right here, kid. We got him, we got the unsub – Hotch is taking him down to the station right now, and then he’s gonna meet us at the hospital with Emily, and JJ, and Rossi…so you gotta hold on, okay?”

“Okay…” Spencer whispered; he was on his back staring up at the sky.

The stars especially bright tonight.

“Come on kid stay with me,” Derek pleaded as he held pressure on Spencer’s chest, “the ambulance is almost here, and we’re so close to the hospital - just hold on a bit longer.”

Stars…that meant something to him, his brain was too foggy to recall what.

“Did you know, that astronomers estimate that in our Milky Way galaxy alone, there are about 300 billion stars,” Spencer rambled as they walked along the street.

It was dark, and stars sparkled like diamonds against the deep, velvety sky.

“I didn’t know that, but I suppose you are the genius here for a reason,” Veronica grinned, his hand was wrapped around hers as she tugged him along.

Spencer wasn’t looking at the stars anymore, he stopped in his tracks which caused Veronica to stop two steps ahead of him. He gently pulled her close to him, so she was pressed against his chest .

“Veronica, I…I think that I’m in lo-”

Veronica.

Spencer wriggled his arm as he tried to guide his hand to his pocket.

“Hey, hey, hey don’t move,” Derek said, panicked, “you bleed more when you move!”

Spencer fumbled around his pocket for his phone, he eventually managed to pull it out and held it out for Derek to take. The screen was decorated with droplets of blood which had transferred from his hand.

Spencer couldn’t look at it; blood, its just blood, he told himself.

“Veronica...” he gasped through short, jagged breaths, “call Veronica...” he said, his hand trembling from the strain of hold his arm up.

Derek took the phone from him and shoved it in his own pocket, “okay, okay, when we’re in the ambulance I’ll call her,” he said, nodding.

Veronica needed to know. He needed to make her understand why he had never introduced her to his team, she needed to know it wasn’t her fault. She needed to know that he wasn’t embarrassed of her, that he loved her more than anything, that he did want to be in this relationship.

Spencer gave a weak smile, “tell her...tell her I...” Spencer’s eyes fluttered shut, and his face, previously screwed up with pain, went slack.

Derek cursed under his breath as he put more pressure on the wound, he was already losing too much blood. The faint wails of sirens were growing louder until an ambulance pulled up next to Derek and a pair of paramedics dashed round to help him.

“He just lost consciousness, I’ve been trying to stop the bleeding...” Derek said, he moved back to allow the paramedics in to help Spencer.

They rolled him onto a stretcher and lifted him up into the ambulance, one of them ran back round to climb in the divers side whilst the other got in the back with Derek. He kept pressure on Spencer’s gunshot wound as the paramedic inserted an IV into his arm, supplying him with more blood.

“Here, let me take over. You sit back,” the paramedic said, motioning to Derek’s blood-soaked hands.

He nodded and dragged his heavy arms away from Spencer’s body. He stared at his face, peaceful from the lack of pain, and pale from the lack of blood.

That’s when he remembered Spencer’s words, what could be his last words, call Veronica. Tell her I...

Derek pulled Spencer’s phone from his pocket and unlocked it, he scrolled through his contacts app till he reached the ‘V’ section.

His finger hovered over Veronica’s name before he finally clicked on it. It rung and rung and rung. Derek’s heart seized in his chest - what if she didn’t answer?

Just as Derek thought it was going to go to voicemail, he heard a voice on the other side of the phone. There was loud music and chatter, but Derek could just make out Veronica’s voice.

“Spencer, I told you-”

“Hi, Veronica,” his voice cracked, “it’s Derek Morgan, we met earlier today...”

read part 2 here

if you enjoyed this please consider leaving a comment as it really keeps me motivated, and reblogging! i really appreciate likes but on the tumblr reblogs are the only way to get my work out there x

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x oc #derek morgan #angst #hurt and comfort #fluff #spencer reid imagine hurt #spencer reid imagine angst #spencer reid headcanons #criminal minds headcanons #criminal minds imagines

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roberttchase · 3 years ago

Note

Manner minded or double trouble? Both SO matty? Maybe Christie looking after him?

double trouble: [character] is sick and injured.

I will be writing the manner minded one separately :) I hope you enjoy this (somewhat more detailed than I'd originally planned) ficlet.

Send prompts to my inbox.

+ + +

If you were to ask Matt Casey if he thought he was lucky, for the most part he would answer with 'no'. Yes, he's lucky enough to have Sylvie Brett as a girlfriend, lucky to have gone to the fire academy, lucky to have been promoted to a lieutenant and then captain. But he also had an emotionally abusive father as a teenager, a murderer for a mother, his girlfriend of eight years was killed, his wife left him. For every good thing, it feels like there are three bad things in his life.

So he can't even really say it's a surprise when, while on scene helping squad rescue two victims in a car that's balancing precariously close to the frozen Chicago River, Matt loses his balance, slips from the hood of the car, and falls almost twelve feet onto the ice that then suddenly cracks underneath him, submerging him in below forty degree water. Nothing in his life is ever easy. Intense pain radiates from his chest, his body feels like it's on fire, and then nothing.

From there, the scene is absolute chaos. Sylvie and Violet are both off shift, spending the entire week in Joliet helping teach at a conference. The two paramedics that are on scene are instantly calling for backup, while both Severide and Tony frantically suit up in scuba gear for precaution. Boden's yelling orders, but the three other members of truck are all frozen, staring at the large hole in the ice, from which their Captain is currently very much not getting out of.

+ + +

"Christie, you really don't have to do this, Severi-"

"I know what Severide said, but I'd feel more comfortable if you stayed with me." Christie Casey frowns, looking at her younger brother. He's at least four shades paler than he should be, cheeks flushed and eyes dull. Stubble consumes the lower half of his face, and the firefighter looks exhausted. She can't say that she blames him, not with the hell that he's gone through the past thirty six hours.

She'd gotten the call from Stella Kidd yesterday, a kind but shaky voice telling her that Casey, Matt, had fallen into an icy river, and was at Gaffney Chicago Medical Center being treated for two broken ribs and mild hypothermia. Arriving half an hour later, she'd been taken into Matt's room, where they had him on enough pain medication he was basically incoherent. One of the doctors had explained to her that the next few hours were important for any person who'd almost drowned- inhalation of the river water had occurred, and aspiration pneumonia was a large possibility. For a naive moment, Christie was certain that Matt would be fine.

Matt's never that lucky.

It's how she finds herself now, half glaring at her brother, who's been given instructions to stay with someone for the next forty eight hours, while his body wars with itself. The red haired doctor had explained that unless the mans fever reaches over 102, or his breathing deteriorates, he's allowed to stay out of the hospital. Severide's offered to let him stay at the loft, to take next shift off and watch over his best friend, but she tells her brothers best friend no. She needs to be able to watch over her little brother, if his paramedic girlfriend can't.

She's already talked to Sylvie, had called her only an hour after getting the call herself. They'd come to the conclusion that as long as someone was there to watch Matt, she needed to finish up the week for the CFD and CEMS.

"You ready to leave? I'm bringing you back to my place. Violet's got the guest room all ready for you."

Matt blinks and then nods, shoulders curved in slightly, one arm wrapped around his side. He looks a little woozy, though that could be from the pain pills being pumped through his body. That, or the fever he's sporting. April wheels him to the front of the hospital while Christie grabs her car and pulls it up to the curb.

Half an hour later, Matt's being helped into the guest room, where, sure enough, the bed has fresh sheets and a few extra pillows have been added for the man who isn't supposed to lay flat on his back. She gets him under the covers, thankful he's cooperating, and by the time she's back with the meds in a little plastic cup, as well as a glass of water, Matt's asleep.

"Matt, hey, you have to wake up and take your medicine, then you can go back to sleep, okay?" She shakes him as gently as possible, not wanting to hurt his ribs any more than they already are. She must knock something loose though, because not a second later he starts coughing, low and harsh, and his eyes flutter open. Gasping for air, they wait for his chest to stop spasming. His arm is cradling his side and she feels terrible, wishing she could help.

"I just need you to take this medicine, then you can sleep again," she promises, holding the cup out for him. When he nods, the woman lets the small pills tumble onto his open palm, and soon he's swallowing them tiredly.

"C-Can you stay?" The words are quiet and hang in the air as she turns to leave. Pausing, Christie turns back and is struck by just how young Matt looks, laying there with fever flushed cheeks and sallow skin.

Moving slowly, the woman gets into the other side of the bed, carefully shifting to get comfortable.

"Just like old times huh?"

She knows he's referring to their childhood. Christie can't help but smirk a little at the memories.

"Are you talking about when you would come crying to me because you were afraid of the dark?" Her tone is teasing, and instinctively she lets her fingers find his hair, running them through it just like she did when they were young teens and their father had been yelling at them.

A laugh bubbles out of Matt's throat, but it quickly changes to coughing, and it takes a moment for Matt to calm down, sipping water before replying.

"I was actually talking about when I was eight and caught whatever that punk across the street had after he coughed on me. I remember I was out of school for a week, and you stayed with me as much as you could."

She remembers it well.

+ + +

Matt never gets sick, not when he was a baby, and not now. She's always been the one to come down with colds or strep throat, and Matt always manages to avoid germs. He had been sick once when he was a toddler, once, but other than that, she can't remember him ever even getting a runny nose. And then Michael Jeffries goes and coughs all over him on the bus when she's in fifth grade and he's in third, and Matt's record of not getting sick goes down the drain.

It had been on a Monday. That following Thursday afternoon, Christie's waiting for Matt to get on the bus when their bus driver tells her that her brother has apparently gone home early. The whole ride home, the eleven year old is upset, not for her brother, but at the fact she wasn't taken out early either. Why did Matt get to go home and play when she didn't? By the time she's walking into their small home, the blonde is stomping her feet and slamming the door behind her, ready to ask why her stupid brother gets such special treatment.

Instantly though, she realizes something is wrong. Mommy isn't downstairs like she normally is, but instead of being worried, the girl let sher anger build. Running up the stairs, her ponytail swaying behind her, Christie's ready to yell and throw a tantrum, but she freezes when she sees her mom sitting on Matt's small twin bed. She's holding their big blue bowl that she always gets out when Christie's stomach is sick, and Matt is throwing up, coughing and spluttering after, while she rubs his back. Cautiously, Christie walks into the doorway.

"Mommy...what wrong with Matt?"

Nancy and Matt look up, the older woman rubbing her sons back.

"Matt's just not feeling well honey, he'll be alright."

Christie frowns and looks at her brother, whose cheeks are a startling bright pink, his skin pale.

"He looks really sick..." Suddenly she's not mad at all anymore, instead she's worried, no, scared. Matt doesn't get sick. That's his superpower, just like hers is liking vegetables.

Before any more words are spoken, Matt coughs and lets out a strangled little whine. "M-Mommy..."

Christie turns her face away as Matt gets sick this time, not wanting to watch anyone throw up. Instead, she goes and busies herself with finding paper and her crayons. Sitting down on her bedroom floor, the eleven year old goes to town with making her brother a get well soon card, the only thing she knows she can do in this moment.

That night, while she and mommy eat downstairs, Christie can hear Matt crying with Daddy. The second she finishes her food and washes her plate off, the blonde runs upstairs, wanting to make sure the younger boy is okay. She stops in front of his room, but no one's there, the twin sized bed with dark green sheets is empty, even his beloved stuffed bear is gone. Walking further down the hall, she sees the two she's been looking for in her parents king sized bed.

Matt's laying against Daddy, Bear clutched in his hand, his ear against the boys lip. Daddy smiles at her and puts a finger to his lips, telling her to be quiet. Nodding, Christie tiptoes in and peers at them both, before climbing in putting a delicate hand on Matt's shoulder, hoping he'll be ok.

+ + +

Brought back to the present, Christie feels Matt's forehead and sighs. "just try and sleep okay? I'll be here if you need me, okay? I won't let anything bad happen to you Matt."

It's as if it's all he's been waiting to hear. It takes him all of two minutes to fall back asleep, head resting against his sisters shoulder. She supposes that this can be the start of all the years she'd missed taking care of him after she'd left for college. He deserves it.

#prompt #my fic #matt casey #casey siblings #chicago fire #lmm-snez-things #this got slightly carried away oops #bb!matt

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rai-wick · 4 years ago

Text

Gally x Reader Chapter 2: First Day

Y/N's P.O.V

I groggily got up and stretched.My body was aching from tossing and turning the whole night not to mention all the images of needles, familiar voices and white rooms flashing through my mind.There was a knock on my door and Minho came in.

"Get up Greenie, we have to get you assigned today"He cheerily said."Get dressed, have breakfast and once you're ready, go to Alby's cabin. See you there" He nodded and left.

I got out of bed and freshened up. I brushed my hair back, I prefered my hair down, it made me feel safe. I kept a hair tie on my wrist just in case. I pulled on a shirt and trousers before heading out to the eating area, I saw some boys having breakfast and laughing before spotting me and looking away. I didn't feel like eating much, so I just got a sandwich and ate it on my way to Alby's cabin which I now thanked that he had shown me earlier.I finished my sandwich and knocked on the door.

"Come in!"

Gally's P.O.V

The door opened and ____ came in. She had dark circles under her eyes, none of us said anything as we all knew how hard the first night in the Glade could be. "Alright ____, here's what we're going to do.We'll run through the rules then we'll tell you about the jobs and you tell us which one you would like to try out. Deal?"Alby said to her.She nodded in response, her face blank."There are 3 main rules.1.Everyone does their part. No slackers.2.Never hurt another Glader. You have to trust each other.3.Never go outside the Glade, unless you're a Runner.Got it?"She nodded and Alby moved on.

"Now you've met Minho, He's the Top Runner. It's his job to run through the maze and try to find a way out. This is Frypan."Frypan nodded from where he was standing."He's in charge of the kitchen and food.Clint and Jeff here are the med-jacks, they look after injuries and sicknesses."Clint gave her a small smile which she didn't return."Newt here is in charge of the gardens as well as my second in command"Newt lifted his hand slightly from where he was standing."And finally, we have Gally, Keeper of The Builders. Although he will insist for you to call him Captain Gally." I rolled my eyes as they all grinned.She still had a blank look on her face. Shuck, does this girl have any emotions?"So what do you think? What do you want to try out first?"

She pondered for a moment before replying "Building"We were all a little suprised at her answer but it was her answer."What?"She raised an eyebrow at us.

"Well we thought you'd want to be a runner"Minho sheepishly said"You were very quick on your feet"

"Building is what I want to do"

"Okay so I guess Gally you're in charge of her. Everyone is dismissed"Alby waved his hand as we left his cabin. ____ stood to the side waiting for me.

"Good Luck" Minho whispered to me"She's like the girl version of you but hotter"

"Slim it"I glared before walking over."Ready?"She nodded in response and we went to the builders section. "You're lucky, today all we have to do is some repairing and mostly just chopping 'cuz it's bonfire night"

"What's bonfire night?"

"It's a tradition we do on the Greenie's first night in the Maze.Although in your case, Alby wanted to wait until you had settled in a little bit.We make a bonfire, get drunk and have a fight off led by yours truly."She looked at me before rolling her eyes.We arrived at the section.I pointed out the different parts to her as she nodded in response."So you can pick a part and I'll help you through it"

She gazed intently around before looking at me and saying "Chopping"

"Are you sure? The axes can be very heavy and a little dangerous"

She crossed her arms and looked at me, with her penetrating ___ stare. "Yes"

"Fine with me"I shrugged and led her to the chopping block. I handed her an axe and showed her how to swing it.She copied me and I have to say she had perfect form. "Very good" I nodded to her and a smirk tugged at the corner of her lips. I handed her a block of wood and showed her how to perfectly chop it. She brought the axe above her head and brought it down hard, splitting the wood in half. Her hair swung around her face and I inwardly chuckled. "You might want to tie up your hair" She tied her hair into a ponytail and I found myself staring at the ground. She looked beautiful with her hair down but when she tied it up, it really brought out her features. I handed her a pile of wood and went to my section.

Y/N's P.O.V

I swung down hard and slice the wood. I put down my axe and wiped the sweat off my face. "Getting tired Greenie?"I looked to see Gally leaning on his axe smirking at me.

"It's ____" I told him coldly.

"Sure thing Greenie" His smirk grew bigger and I turned my back on him.I finished chopping and stuck my axe into the ground.

"Done" I told Gally with a bored expression. He looked at the pile and back at me.

"Not bad for your first day Greenie. I didn't think you had it in you"

I crossed my arms and looked at him with an eyebrow raised"Because I'm a girl?"

"Well ya"

"Guess you were wrong Captain Gally" He glared at me and I turned on my heel as the lunch bell rang.I picked up a plate and put some food on it before grabbing an apple. I went to the table I had sat on yesterday. I sat down and began eating.

"Excuse me but can do you mind if we join you?" I looked up to see Newt, Minho, Chuck and Gally staring at me. I looked at the big empty table and nodded. Gally, Newt and Minho sat across from me and Chuck sat next to me. I turned to myself back to the food.

"So Gre-" I looked at Minho daring him to call me Greenie"____. How was your first day in the glade?"

"Fine"

"I hope Captain Gally isn't giving you a hard time."he grinned and I shrugged in response as Minho sighed and went back to his food."Your turn"I heard him mutter to Newt.

"Your turn?"I asked him and they all looked away blushing.

"Err, Alby told us that we should try and make you laugh so you feel more at home here."I rolled my eyes and picked up my apple.

"No thanks"I took a bite of it."I'm not really a laughing type of person"

"So you're telling me, nothing makes you laugh?"Minho raised his eyebrow at me while I shrugged again.

"There's got to be something"I shook my head and picked up my plate.I walked away and threw my rubbish in the bin before walking back to my station.

~A FEW HOURS LATER~

I put down my axe and threw the last of the wood in the pile. I smelled something nasty before realising that it was me. I put my axe with all the other axes and headed to my cabin.

"Hey Greenie!" Irritated, I turned around to see Gally smirk at me."See ya at the bonfire eh?"

"Maybe you will, maybe you won't"

"You can't miss it, it's like missing your own funeral"

"That's a bloody terrible comparison" I raised an eyebrow at him

"I'll take that as a yes"He turned around and walked away. I rolled my eyes and went to my cabin for a shower. When I got in, I stripped myself of clothes and went into the shower.The warm water soothed all my pains as it washed over my body. I showered quickly and turned the water off. I went into my room and pulled out a fresh pair of clothes. I dried my hair and brushed it.There was a knock on my door and I opened it to see Chuck standing there. He nervously smiled.

"Yes?"

"Umm, Newt wanted me to tell you that they're starting. You are coming?"He gently smiled"It is good fun"

"Fine, but just for a little while" I told him.

"See you there" He started to walk away but I grabbed hold of his shoulder.He looked at me, terrified.

"We can go together"

"Oh okay" He let out a sigh of relief as I put on my shoes. I closed the door behind me and we walked to the bonfire where everyone was gathered.

"Look, Greenie made it" Gally pointed out as I sat down.Everyone cheered as I rolled my eyes.They began talking and drinking as the fire in the center roared.Chuck seated himself on my right as Newt and Minho walked over with a bottle in their hands.

"Hey ____, glad you came"Newt sat next to me and Minho beside him.

"Mhm"

"Here drink this"Minho held out the bottle and I looked at him.

"You want me to drink a bottle with suspicious contents?"He nodded enthusiastically"Yeah, not happening"

"It's a special drink we make on bonfire night"

"So?"

"Just have a sip"

I peered into the bottle"Did you guys pee in it or something?" They all looked at me before bursting into laughter.

"What?! No, it's just water and some ingredients. Gally makes it"Newt told me.

"Could have guessed"I looked over at him and our eyes briefly met.I had to admit, he was cute, in a bashful kind of way. I looked back to Newt and Minho who were looking at me expectantly.

"It's not too bad" Chuck assured me.

"Here goes " I took off the lid and took a gulp. It burned and I coughed, handing the bottle back to Minho.

"That's bloody awful" I said as they laughed loudly.

"Fight! Fight! Fight!" We looked over to see the guys forming a circle.

"What are they doing?"

"They're playing this game Gally came up with. You make a circle, 2 gladers stand inside and they try to push each other out"Chuck explained

"Sounds stupid"

"Eh" Newt replied "Bit of entertainment" They all stood up."You coming to watch ____?"

"Might as well" I stood up and followed them to the circle. It was Gally against some guy, I think his name was Zart. Gally was beating him quite easily, constantly throwing him out of the circle. Finally Zart admitted defeat. Everyone laughed as Gally smirked.

"Who's next?"He peered around the circle and spotted me"What about you Greenie?"I was about to say no when everyone started chanting "Greenie! Greenie! Greenie!" And I found myself pushed into the circle.I turned around to glare at the culprit and found Minho whistling and not meeting my eyes. I turned back to Gally as he explained the rules.

"The aim is to push the other person out of the circle"

"Still stupid"I muttered and he glowered at me. We circled each other and he jumped at me, trying to scare me. I didn't flinch instead giving him a skeptical look. He shoved me hard and I stumbled but caught myself in time.He ran towards me and I swiftly dodged him causing him to almost fall out. I turned and smirked at him. I placed one foot in front of me and and reached out my hand. I beckoned him forward.

"Come on, Captain Gally" I mocked as everyone looked at each other with wide eyes. He spat on the ground and charged towards me. I grabbed his arm and judo flipped him to the ground. He grunted and got up as I moved the hair out of my face. He looked at me and tackled me to the ground. I groaned as he got up with a smirk. No way was I going to be beaten by some arrogant bastard. I swept my leg around his ankle, knocking him down. He stood up quickly and threw a punch at me but I quickly bent my knees back and dodged.I stood up and put my foot on his chest and gave him a hard kick, shoving him out of the circle. There was a silence as we both panted before an explosion of cheers."____! ____! ____!" I smirked triumphantly at Gally who smirked back.

"You're not half bad"

"Funny, I was about to say the same to you" He shook his head at me as Chuck came running up to me, excited.

"That was awesome!"

"Thank you Chuck"

"You were amazing ____!"Newt laughed.

"Yeah, now if we can just get a smile out of you"Minho grinned.

"Good luck with that"I rolled my eyes and started to walk away.

"Hey! Where ya going? We just got started"

"No thanks" I waved goodbye as they groaned"Have fun!"

I smiled to myself as I opened the door to my cabin. Exhausted by today's events, I collapsed in the hammock, not bothering to change.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

#gally #gally imagine #gally x reader #maze runner gally #gally imagines #newt #newt imagine #the maze runner #thomas maze runner #maze runner minho

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soranihimawari · 3 years ago

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Bella Donnas & Love

This is the final installment of the Hanahaki Disease AU featuring the Seijoh Four. This is a Mattsukawa Issei x Yin (YN/Reader) story.

Word Count: 4.3 K

Warnings: mentions of depression, suicidal attempts, mentions of burn out, and intrusive thoughts

Recommended Audience: 17+ (minors recommended to not read because of the warnings attached)

Pairing: Mattsukawa Issei x reader// MIA->MIF [Mattsukawa Issei angst to Mattsukawa Isei fluff]

Mattsukawa Issei is a simple man. He sees the world in copious amounts of black, white, and gray; it isn’t because he is colorblind either. It is because he knows his worth. Truthfully, his parental figures were always a bit worried about their son especially given the profession he has chosen to pursue. Being in the business of burning and or burying the dead, Mattsukawa Issei is a fan of the loneliest times in a lifetime: they say when we are brought into the world, we are alone, and when we pass on, we too exit the world alone. There is nothing wrong with finding a job in the business of death, but even angels have demons. And for Mattsukawa, you are an exquisite example of the dichotomy between his dark side and your eventual akin to the brighter side.

It is a known fact in Japan, the pressure to be perfect or to fit into the mold of society has been a fatal flaw throughout the years. This is the main reason why at exactly two fifty-five in the morning, Mattsukawa Issei notices a young person, hanging out on the edge of the skyscraper across his workplace. There was a late night arrival to the city morgue; he just needed to be there to sign the paperwork to turn over the embalming processes to his mentors. It was the deceased wishes to be buried in the mausoleum in the home town of their forefathers: the mountain side of Nagasaki.

You were having a rough day: you were told you by your employers that you’ve been slacking for too long getting numbers for the statistics presentation coming up with business partners across the South China Sea. Then your grandparent were strictly feeding toxic lies to your parent(s) about how you would never find a suitable partner to marry you. Quite frankly, because you put your career and studies first, you had no issues putting your family in their place. The intrusive thoughts, snide comments about your appearance, was enough for you to glance at the sleeping pills that were prescribed to you to assist in a normal pattern, to invade your subconscious. The events which led you to climb the fire escape up to the rooftop garden in your kitten heels made for a daring flirtation with death. There have been nights the last couple of months where your heart is heavy in your chest, your lungs are intoxicating you with the poisonous belladonna petals.

“What a time to find out I’m going to die a lot sooner than I thought,” you sighed into your palm. Your eyes scour the hazy city in the afterglow; after a tizzy of a day you had, you chose that perhaps this might be a sign of the universe you were better off dead. Either that or your soulmate would be in extreme pain and you didn’t want to disappoint their perception of your love. Then again, you wouldn’t know what love, honest, and kind would feel like even when you’re about to let it all go.

You are devoid of emotion as you bring yourself to your feet. A hand of yours drags across your face. The drop is high enough to entice little to severe damage like broken legs, or severe head trauma, but to be truly free, you wish to be put out of your misery as quickly as possible.

Mattsukawa sees the figure clad in a lighter powder blue and his eyes are wide with fear. The morgue worker and delivery driver had already gone off into the night to complete the rest of the deliveries of bodies to the funeral homes. As soon as he finished locking up and registering the corpses, Mattsukawa was determined to see your hair wind blowing on the rooftops. The blurred vision he sees makes the twenty-seven year old shiver. Even in his line of work, this was the second instance he wanted to save someone. He knew of you: the business woman who was suffering from a similar ailment to him. The belladonna hues from your rebellious highlights enticed him to notice how you seemed a bit off at the coffee house you frequent by the funeral parlour he had been working at.

“Excuse me,” you said, holding on to your mug. Your knuckles were white with tension, so Mattsukawa did something unexpected of himself: he gave you way, but instead of sitting on the opposite side of the restaurant cafe, he sat directly across from you. The crowd was getting to be a bit noisy, but you and him sat there staring off center, hyper fixating on the number of people sign in either direction.

“Why do you smell like belladonna?” You asked. You had a glance meet you with a harsh smile.

“It’s part of my line of work. I use it to bury the dead at the request for all nameless suiciders that wind up on my table,” Mattsukawa explains. The oils from his embalming course was enough to mimic actual belladonna, but has he noticed from her, it wasn’t coming from just his hands: it was coming from her hair. He asked a question about why you seemed so strung up lately and like a fool, you told him everything which was bothering you. If anything, this man was a silent confession box. He seemed like the genuine article, so when you check for the time, you realize it was time to leave and head back to the office to grab the final jump drive for the presentation. Things at work seemed to have gotten better since the next time you’d see your precious Mattsukawa would be in the next life. You never truly disclosed your name to him, so he made a note call you Bella or Donna (whichever you preferred really). His smile is flirtatiously coy and you felt your cheeks grow a bit warm from the moment he told you his name.

For whatever reason, perhaps Mattsukawa was feeling a bit lucky, he asked you to dinner the day before yesterday. He wanted to know you, truth and all, bruised and damaged as you were, the meds your doctor prescribed were starting to cushion the intrusive thoughts. However that changed the moment you give him a nod, he grabs your hand as you’re about to leave the cafe; gently he squeezes your fingers for reassurance.

“You’ll do great Miss. I believe in you,” Mattsukawa whispers in the last part. The cafe begins to echo again, so you couldn’t hear the last part, but you were sure it was an encouraging word. Mattsukawa was the first person in a long while to give you something so few in your battlefield mind would want (or need): hope.

“Goodbye Mattsukawa.”

With that said, you were gone from the cafe and headed back into the office where a different manager made your life hell because their normal assistant was very organized, but the constant comparison was enough to make your head explode.

Presently, you stand on the ledge, glancing down like a superhero vigilante, but just as you were about to take a dive, you feel a pair of strong arms wrap themselves around your waist. The hands are interlocked under your empire waist line and if it wasn’t for the fact your hair was probably in a ponytail prior to this predicament, you’re sure your band was lost to gravity and the wind. You thrashed about in your captor’s arms, not realizing this person was about to save you from an awful mistake.

You see, Mattsukawa Issei is a funeral employee; he dresses sharply like an agent of the Grim Reaper. He is suave and debonair; he loves watching the life cycles of the various flower arrangements in his mentors stores go throughout the seasons. His heart and soul is full of vibrancy you have yet to comprehend; Mattsukawa was always a strong individual and you could ask anyone of his friends in school what kind of person he was. So, what made you so different? Sure you were stressed out, anybody could see that, but Mattsukawa picked up on the depressive aura you emanated. Did he really want to sit in front of you that afternoon? Sure; it was mainly because he couldn’t shake this feeling ever since you were ahead of him in line to order that he was supposed to meet you here (even if you were at your lowest post appointments at the business office downtown).

You struggle to let go, but the owner of these hands does not wish to loosen their grip on you; you ask twice kindly to be left alone and the soft ortund tone of the stranger’s voice from the cafe stops you from thrashing about further.

He tumbles back and lands on his arse with you sitting on his lap, pressed against his broad chest. His sleeves from the black oxford shirt he wears is rolled up to his elbows, and his hands still are in an interlocked position. Mattsukawa has seen some pretty fucked up causes of death recently, yet this time, he wanted to save you, not bury you. He wants to see you tomorrow night at dinner in the diner close to his loft; he wants you to understand maybe death isn’t all that grand and if you struggle with your mind everyday, he wishes to someday be of importance to you. You’re in charge of your own autonomous decisions, yet Mattsukawa wants you to give him a chance to prove to you that love, hope, and for the very fortunate, miracles exist (even if you weren’t shown any).

“You’re sick,” he closes his eyes. Apparently, you pick up on the frown in his voice and somehow, you’re sixth sense of empathy decides not to fight his tonality, but rather when you subconsciously agree and call your mental state one of a landmine, he doesn’t make a fuss. It was a short exam and you realize may be life is worth living for a nano-second. You could have an entire relationship with this man from the cafe in a span of two hours, if that. The fates must have had a wicked sense of humor when pairing either of you to the other: one who works with and around death, the other has an affinity to try and cross into the next life every moment things in the sea turn too rough.

You slowly stop trying to fight him the moment you hear his voice toss in the wind. Instead, you move your hands to hover limply on his, leaning back and letting his breathing calm you. The smell of belladonna from your hair oil wafts through the air. “Suicide is not how I want your story to end.”

“You have no idea what you’re talking about or-o-or,” you stammer on. “Perhaps I don’t want to be alive anymore because people keep interfering.”

This causes Mattsukawa’s heart to gain a solid crack. You toss your head back and land harshly against his sternum, causing him to grunt and inhale sharply.

It rips seamlessly to his soul. In the past six to eight years since he entered his chosen profession, he has seen corpses from all ages, the youngest being eight who suffered from a myriad of health issues including Hanahaki because the playground friend in their preschool years was going to be theirs when the time properly came. Mattsukawa, the night he was on duty for the wake, anonymously donated the flowers that would have made the child laugh on wishes. Sure, life does have it’s moments when it tests us, yet he couldn’t wrap his head around the burn out business person from earlier this week, who was now in his arms, safe.

Unintentionally landing on his back with you on top of his chest was not how he had pictured becoming a hero. Just for one night, Mattsukawa Issei, the stern and most silent of the volleyball players in high school, was a hero worthy of saving a life.

“Argh,” he groans.

He coughs quietly away from your face when his hands loosen their hold. You chose to not chastise him about not wearing a sweater in the middle of autumn. After all, this man was the only one who would be daft enough to try and stop you. You curl into him, hiding your face in the satin finish of his dress shirt; you promise to buy him a new one as long as you let him hide your eyes and you break down. You’re crying over the smallest inconvenience and on top of feeling like a burden to the man, you consistently apologize by saying it’s no one’s fault especially his when you catch yourself in your darkest moment.

Mattsukawa listens to your request: with one hand, he covers your left side of your face, the right is patting your hair down, reassuring you that he will console you until the sobs stop and the sniffles remain.

“You’re lucky I live and work not too far from here doll,” he whispers into your hair. You’re calming down as you hiccup the last couple of bubbles of air. You nod in understanding the words he was saying, but you still have your eyes closed to shield himself (and keep your pride intact) when he would peer into your bloodshot ones.

“Don’t worry about me tryin’ anything either. You’ve been through enough tonight. Just let me take care of you for the rest, ok?”

“Mmhm,” you agree. He sits up half way and you rise with him, your eyes ever looking westward until you see one of his handkerchiefs from his back pants pocket dangle in your line of sight. You stifle a laugh, utter a thanks, and begin to dry your face. Mattsukawa, when you were done, doesn’t hold your face anymore, even if it pains him to do so. Your free hand decides for both of you: your left reaches for his and you bring the calloused hand, opened palm, to your cheek. Your skin is soft and sticky from the tears, but if anyone were to ask Mattsukawa what it felt like to save a life, he would humbly point you out in a crowd and say ‘Ask ‘em yourself.’

“I lost sight of the things that brought me joy,” you say quietly. You’re breathing in his cologne and it smells like whiskey sours. The scent grounds you, as you recall your therapist giving you stress-relieving tricks such as naming five to ten things your senses pick up on. Your cheeks feel soft like mochi ice against Mattsukawa’s open palm; you see the neon lights hazily glow in the city below you; and finally, you hear his shirt ruffle against the shell of your ear when you finally calm down.

“Everyone does,” Mattsukawa agrees. “Can you do something for me?”

“Mattsukawa-san,” you said his name and he chuckles in surprise. You remembered his name? This was even better than before. He finds himself falling gently in like with you. The love between long lost friends is what keeps him afloat. Unwillingly, you find yourself amusedly smiling at his tanned skin glowing with a soft hues under his eyes. Was this man blushing?

“Call me Issei or Mattsun,” his voice says when his other hand loops around your waist. He buried his head on your right shoulder.

Tonight you learn that even strong and by your standards of “fine men” do in fact cry. You blink a couple more times and he just cries a mixture of tears he has no control over.

“Mattsun,” you say, voice soft like the breeze sending a boat to sail. “I’m sorry about all this.”

“You could have said you weren’t feeling well if you didn’t want to go out with me,” Mattsukawa jokes, turning his head to the side so you wouldn’t see his tear stricken face to the side. He asks you, if you felt comfortable enough, to just stay still for a moment.

The rooftop rendezvous was not what you had in mind when you came home from clocking out, but considering you were heavily contemplating ending your existence earlier, this one request was not too hard to fulfill. The belladonna in your bronchioles seemed to dislodge itself into your lungs. You stay as still as your companion had asked and you breathe in time together. His curls are soft to the touch and when he relaxes his shoulders when you run a hand through his hair, you feel him grin on the right of your shoulder blades.

Was this what it felt like to be you every hour before you both met at the cafe? This profound sadness doesn’t leave his heart nor does he quite shake the feeling of the leaves of the belladonna flowers taking root in his lungs. The flowers bloomed slowly since his twenty-third birthday were the same ones you dyed your hair for. You’ve been suffering with the hanahaki disease for quite some time, you confess back to him.

“Is that why you were here? Trying to jump?” Mattsukawa asks an innocent inquiry. He seemed like he was about to be scolded for the first time in seven years, yet you thought it was kind of adorable. And so you do something you haven’t done in a very long time: you scoff (although you were sure it was closer to a giggle.

“No,” you reply. “I was contemplating jumping because all my triggers hit at once, so I’ve been in a depressive episode for quite some time before we met.”

“Oh,” Mattsukawa acknowledges. “Do you want to stay the night?”

“…that’s awfully forward of you,” you say. Your pragmatic inner voice says to decline, but there is a mischievous side of his mannerisms, nonetheless you are curious. It is late into the evening already, so perhaps the offer is a better one. After all, you think the change of scenery would do you some good, so you humbly agree.

Roughly an hour later, you find yourself in Mattsukawa’s living room area. Offering his shower to you, you ask if there is something he can lend you. It is an old shirt with his high school cactus logo on it, but the shorts he tosses to you has a VBC and his old number stitched on the back pocket. Mattsukawa hands you a spare towel and tells you how to work the shower in his bathroom. Twenty minutes later, you sit close to the kotatsu even if it’s not too cold outside at the moment, you tend to sleep better underneath one.

Prior to your shower, Mattsukawa-san graciously gave you a small tour of his loft when you arrived. The walk wasn’t too far from the rooftop building and so you two walk side by side until the loft complex came into view. Mattsukawa says hi to the doorman who makes a joke or two about how he had almost pulled another overnight at the funeral home.

“Be careful with that one miss, he’d work himself to death! Ha! Work himself to death,” the doorman says, wiping a faux tear from his eye. You snickered covering your smile with the back of your hand. When you put it to the side of your body, Mattsukawa notices how dazzling your smile is. How would someone who smiles this much at a pun, hold so much carnage of self-doubt and depressive thoughts in their heart? Is that why your flowers and your scent are wrapped in poisonous belladonna? Mattsukawa shakes this thought to the furthest parts of his mind. You’re here now, in the next room, safe under the same roof.

The master bedroom door is opened just a crack once Mattsukawa is half-dressed in his pajama pants, parading around shirtless fetching a glass of water from the kitchen. You were already seated on the barstool peering out the sliding glass door of the patio outside. Jumping was not the way to die for you, you think. Perhaps if you died with love, perhaps you’d have a better chance of reincarnation than you thought. The ambient sounds of the refrigerator and the water spout being used brought you back to hold the gaze of your host for the evening. You made a conscientious decision to cash in on your PTO at your work location for the next two weeks via e-mail. You explain to the HR representative you were feeling burn out and your therapist was working with you to battle the depressive episodes you were going through. The automotive message came back saying someone from the office of internal affairs would look into the chain of command in your division. However, you could care less about work at the moment, since you were enjoying the company of the person who helped kept you tied to this world.

“You like what you see?” Mattsukawa says smoothly. The water glass is placed on the counter in front of you. After graduation from Aoba Josai, running and other kinesthetic stretches were included in his workout regiment. You froze, placing your phone face down to the extreme left of the counter space. The granite glowed in the soft lamp from behind you, casting shadows in the grooves of his muscular features.

“I don’t know how to answer that,” you tease. “But I do like the person who saved me from making a huge mistake.”

Mattsukawa nods as he leans forward to rest his chin in his hand.

“I’ll always come running to you Yin,” he gives you a nickname close to the currency your country uses. This causes you to roll your eyes, yet you reassure him it was filled with endearment.

“You sound like you’re going to love me until the day I properly die Mattsun.”

He wasn’t expecting you to climb halfway across the granite counter, stretching your back further parallel to the floor (your feet are balancing your lower half on the chair).

His hand finds its way to the small of your back and he says a quick, “pardon me.” The onyx eyes he owns close and crinkle upward like small crescent moons before you feel his pursed lips press against your forehead.

“You’re safe here,” you hear him say. His warmth is a welcomed blanket of comfort for you; his words are kinder than your own thoughts.

“Will you kiss me properly?” You ask.

“In the morning, first thing,” he answers. “But first, sleep.”

Mattsukawa walks around his counter to keep you from hanging in the balance thus lowering the risk of you falling knees first on the floor.

“Remember how you fell on top of me?” Mattsukawa’s voice is low. You swallow nervously; you affirm that you do. “Good. Now hold on to me sweetheart.”

He leans back against your left side of your suspended body and he wraps an arm around your mid-section and you push off with your elbows. The next thing you are aware of, you are being carried like a drowsy child to the living room where you sit on Mattsukawa’s lap like before. You raise a hand to his smooth face, your fingers tracing the highest points of his features; his eyes flutter close to the sensational spell you are casting; he is about to fall in the in-between of sleep and lucidity when he feels your lips press firmly against his. When you back down, he stops you with one word: “More. One more time.”

You turn your head at an angle the moment you feel his hands turn you around to straddle him more comfortably.

“Better,” you confirm. Your nose teases his own and he languidly looks at you before he pushes your back playfully and your lips meet his again.

You sigh against his lips when your knees come into contact with his cushion; his arms move away from your hips to your ribs. The callouses he earned over the years of playing volleyball in high school memorizes the map of your skin. Together, the aroma of belladonna almost dissipates the pain in your lungs the longer you are breathing in everything the young man in front of you is giving.

This was as brave as you wanted to be right now. You’d be more adventurous months into your new found relationship with your restaurant-cafe rendezvous man. Your hands trace his collar bones before they found their purchase on the sides of his neck.

“I like that,” you say when you are given a chance to catch your breath. Mattsukawa’s hands rest on your love handles again and he pushes you into a loose embrace. Your hair tickles his shoulder when you rest your head against his pectoral.

“I like this too,” he says, running his fingers lightly up and down your spine. “Close your eyes and rest for a while Yin. We can talk about this in the morning, ok?”

You stifle a yawn, agreeing.

A few minutes later, after you are truly asleep, Mattsukawa supports you in his arms and he carries you like a child, careful to support your neck as your legs rest limply above his hips, to his room. He lays you down first and then proceeds to tuck you in; staying above the duvet, he watches over you breathing in and out steadily, the last small petals escaping your lips when you cough softly in your sleep. Mattsukawa stares at the last shriveled one on the corner of your lips and swats it away.

“Pretty angel, don’t scare me like that. I don’t want to lose you,” Mattsukawa reaches over to hold your hand; fingers intertwining around your own and you squeeze his back. “You’ll be alright and I will help you keep nightmares away.”

“Why?” Your voice is laced with sleep. “Why do you want to love me?”

“Because our story is just beginning my love.”

Mattsukawa rubs his thumb over your knuckles and when he lies down further on his bed next to you, he rests a protective arm over your shoulders.

#sora scribbles #sora after hours #🌻— flying around collecting pollen—queue #🌻 txt #haikyuu x reader #cw: intrusive thoughts #cw: depressive episode for yn #cw: unsuccessful suicide attempt #cw: burn out form work and life in general #mattsukawa x you

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insufferablelust · 4 years ago

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The dying and Its blossoming.

The one where Y/N love Spencer Reid, but soon find out that he might or might not have found someone else.

OKAY HELLO, this is the angst i talked about yesterday, it’s sad.. but has a happy ending so don’t cry just yet! anyway the reason why i write this is because i’ve been numb for few days and i want to cry bad so i just decided to write. And this is what i came up with, it made my soft ass cried so hopefully.. it can get through to you too, happy reading! oh and TAAHM is also uploading soon!

MASTERLIST OF ALL MY WORKS.

WARNINGS : ANGST, heartbreak stuff, fluff at the end, thats it i think!!

————🍃————

It was the little things he did that caught your eyes since you joined the team. The way he first introduced himself to you, shaking your hands with the brightest smile beaming on his face. The way he always put a coffee on your desk before you arrived. The way he would review all the case with you, going over the files together and staying late to work on paperworks together. The way he called you a week after Maeve’s death and asked you to stay on the phone. So on and so forth.

Falling for Spencer Reid is inevitable, how can it not be inevitable? when you and him practically do all things together, Dr Who marathons, Drive to Rossi’s, even accompanying him to Vegas one time to visit his Diana.

The first time you felt it, felt the spark— you shook away your thoughts and scoffed at yourself, it’s just a stupid crush. You tried, tried so hard to believe that it was just a stupid crush. Yet the more time you spent together, the more your heart take over your brain, convinced you to love him, and convinced you to think that he’s in love with you. Truth and confession aside, you could’ve sworn he’s in love with you, these are facts right? all these moments? surely it has to mean something to him, like it meant something to you.

Confuses and frustrated, the next person you called was Emily, your closest friend besides Spencer. She knows how head over heels you are for him, and how much you’re willing to do anything for him. So that night you spilled all your confusions and worries as you sipped on your wine, your teeth constantly biting your nails— if Spencer was here, he would’ve told you that “Y/N, do you know that biting your nails—“ and you would listen to him contently even if you already knew what he was about to say.

“It’s just— i’m not crazy to think he loves me back right? or at least like me?” You stresses, chugging down the last bit of your drink as you hear Prentiss chuckled on the other side.

“What? No Y/n, look i’ve practically grown up with you guys, and all i can say is that you both really need to realize how much you actually need each other, so stop worrying, go get your man.”

Now when Emily said that, she didn’t mean it as literally going over to Spencer’s house like what you were doing right now. Only wearing an oversize sweater and pair of jeans, you looked so comfy inside those sweater paws that you let out an annoyed huffed, ‘now he’ll think i’m a child’ then an idea popped inside your head, causing a big cute smile to appear on your cheeks. Your hand reached to the backseat, sighing when you find what you were looking for; Spencer’s purple sweater.

Now you didn’t stole it, he gave it to you, because you’ve mentioned one morning that “They are all sold out Spence! you’re one of the lucky ones” The annoyed look on your face must be so embarrassing that he gave his godforsaken lilac sweater to you the next day, with the Spencer reid’s famous smile “Here, you can keep it, i already washed it but it’ll probably smells like me still cause i smell like my clothes and i used my—“

“Lavender, you always use lavender for your clothes, i remember Spencer! oh my heavens! Thank you.” You can’t forget how seemingly happy he looked, cheeks flushed, as flushed as yours.

You sighed contently at the thought, as you exited your car, clutching his sweater on your chest as you head up to his apartment. Now you see, if the plan does work you’ll just say that you need for him to wear it again because the smell starting to wear off, which made you giggle. So you jog upstairs quickly to his apartment door before knocking, “Spencer?”

You frowned, usually he always opened his door right after you knock, why’s he taking so long? so out of worry you knock few times “Hello? Spencer?” this time you were met by voices of two people, giggling and hushing each other, as they got closer, you giggled in thought ‘maybe you’ll find garcia there who knows?”

But the moment someone opened Spencer’s door your eyes went wide, and your brain tries to make a sense out of what you’re seeing. Here standing in front of you is a girl, a stunning woman you’ve neither met or recognized but one thing you recognized is how well Spencer’s sweater clung on her body, and how happy she looked while she’s standing on his door wearing his clothes with his mug in hand.

“May i help you?” She asked with a smile, you could see the blue colored scrub bottom on her, A surgeon, judging by her uncharacteristically warm welcome, you guessed pediatrics. Damn it Y/N no time for profiling.

“Is spencer he—“

“Who is it, love?”

Oh... so this is why he canceled your usual movie night two days ago, this is why he’s been saying he’s busy when you asked him to drive you to your usual hangout library, this is why he’s been so happy recently.. this is the reason. a mid 20 possibly 30 years old gorgeous Surgeon with a warm smile and impossibly sweet attitude.

“Uh i think she’s your friend from work, Y/N right?”

You concluded then and there that you don’t like how she said your name, it was selfish but you hated how kind it sounds whilst you’re here standing in front of her, eyes glassy and lips trembling. Then when you thought you’ve seen it all, your eyes locked with Spencer, he— looked so content and comfortable, happy. He looked so happy with his...

“Y/N, hi what are you doing here so late? oh and Y/N meets (G/N) and (G/N) meets Y/N, she’s my best friend from work”

So thats what you were, Best friends who acts like a couple, best friends who hold hands, best friends who shared a drunken kiss, best friends who poured everything to each other, best friends who— you can go on and on yet you can feel how tight your chest is becoming, Anxiety— fuck you have to get out of here.

“Y/N?”

“I-i, uh here’s your um sweater, i— figured you might want uh it back, alright i gotta go now.” Spencer didn’t missed how your hand trembles so bad when you handed him the sweater, or how glassy your eyes looked, or how your face looked like it was drained of color, and how you struggled to breathe, her anxiety attacks.

“Y/N wait!” Before he could mention anything, she went down quickly and running towards her car.

“What was that all about?” His girlfriend asked him, which he shook his head in reply, and muttered “no idea, let me check” So he went down, to no surprise, her car was speeding away.

What Spencer didn’t know was that Y/N came home wishing she could’ve been smart enough to noticed the damn signs, or smart enough to never let her heart fooled her into thinking a genius, a guy like him would ever have any feelings for her.

She went to the bathroom, not bothering to wash her face instead she sat down near the sink and then she cried, she hugged her knees and Y/N cried that night, cried so hard that she tire herself out, falling asleep on the floor of her bathroom.

——————

The next morning, she woke up with a headache that’s practically yelling at her to take some meds and drink, her eyes opened slowly as she found herself laying on the cold bathroom floor. Slowly she tried to get up, holding onto the nearest wall as she feel her knees buckled and her head pounding, she let out string of curses before managing to stand fully, leaning over the sink to see herself in the mirror.

The sight is terrifying, her eyes bloodshot red, her face looks dull drained of color, her lips dry, her hair is a mess and her nose is runny. She continue to stare at her misery some more until her phone rang, flaring up the headaches. Great.. Must be a fucking case.

“Hello?” She mentally cringed hearing herself, she doesn’t sound like herself, she sounded like she just drank 30 bottles of alcohol then managed to broke her vocal cords.

“Hi... Y/N are you okay?” Emily’s voice was soothing at least, she sighed as she gulped down an aspirin and took some clothes out of her closet.

“Yeah, We have a case?” She knew that Emily would dig up the conversation more if she didn’t jumped straight to the point, and Y/N is in no mood to talk.

“Yes, wheels up in 40 but if you cant—“

“I’ll be there in 10.”

—————

Y/N took a quick shower, before putting on your work pants, a simple V-neck t-shirt and top it with a blazer, quickly gulping the rest of her water before combing her hair and then head out the door. When she parked her car, her memory drove back to last night, causing her to groan in mental and physical pain— tears welling in her eyes as she violently hitting the steering wheel.

“Not now, Not fucking now.” She closed her eyes before leaning back against the headrest and take a deep breath, calming herself down. She prayed to herself that she won’t break down if she sees Spencer.

She won’t break down.

She keep chanting that inside her pounding head as she walked out of the elevator, entering the bullpen, quickly grabbing her go bag and place it on top of her desk before heading upstairs to the meeting room.

She knew where he usually sit, so when she entered the room, she tried her best to look at Garcia, presenting the case. “Sorry i’m late, traffic is a damn bitch, Double homicide Garcia?” She asked, as she sit down between Emily and JJ, looking down at her files, noticed how stupid she was to use files instead of the tablet which she refused so she could review the cases with Spencer on the plane, Now look who’s laughing. What she didn’t realized realized is that all eyes were on her disheveled looking state, no amount of make up could cover the misery, i suppose.

“Yes, we’re thinking surrogates for a blond woman with wealthy family. Y/N are you okay?” She visibly tensed, hearing his voice is like opening up a fresh wound and pour some acid on top. She wished he could just shut up and not talk to her anymore, not now or in few days at least.

“Fine. Garcia, any other leads?” Y/N looks up to Garcia, to find her with a frown on her face, clearly wanting to say something. But Y/N has the pleading look in her eyes, and the way she tilted her head made Garcia shook her head and replied with a small “Nuh uh thats it, the rest is on your file” Nodding at her with a silent thank you, you get up and left the room, which in other cases Emily won’t appreciate but she let it slide because she knew something’s wrong.

“Y/N” Not him again, you muttered on your head, as you zipped up your go bag.

“Y/N..” Then he touched you, touched your arms, he touched you and you exploded, all your willpower ceased to exist as you swat his hand away and giving him a warning.

“Don’t touch me unless necessary, don’t talk to me unless it’s about the case, and do not call me by my first name, it’s agent Y/L/N, have a good day Dr.Reid”

—————

Throughout the entirety of the case, neither you nor spencer talk to each other, only piling up opinions about the case, the team have caught the unsub of course, so now you’re heading back to DC.

The longer you sit on the very opposite end to where Spencer sit, your mind started to wonder back to what happened three days ago. Being on the case has definitely helped distract you from the reality that Spencer Reid has a girlfriend and that you’re a fool to ever believed that he could love you. You’re so deep in thought whilst looking at the soft curls of his hair, you didn’t realized Emily has sat down next to you.

“A girlfriend?”

“What?”

“He has a girlfriend doesn’t he?” Your eyes darted to Emily’s as you sighed heavily, closing your eyes and leaned your head against her shoulder. “She’s a surgeon, pediatrics i think, she probably smarter than i am, um she smile a lot and she’s holding a cup of coffee when i arrived so i’m guessing she’s a nice person, there’re cat fur on her hair so i guess she has a cat which he should’ve hate being a germaphobe and all but i guess she love that kind.” Y/N half whispered half yelled, as she stared at his poking head still that is before she heard Emily burst out laughing.

“I’m sorry, Y/N you profiled her?”

“Em!” You whined as you shove her shoulder, you crossed your arms on your chest as you huffed and pout like a child. “I’m sorry it’s just.. oh god you even notices cat hair” She laughed again, which caused you to laugh loudly, feeling the joy overcome you in full force before you started to cry, not knowing why. Tears kept on falling down your face as Emily hugged you and rubbing your back “Its okay, let it out sweet girl. I got you.” That was the last thing you remembered before falling asleep.

—————

It’s been a week since the last case, you’re finally able to hold yourself up and not cry every 2 hours is an achievement. You spent your time on an autopilot mode, woke up, work, avoid Spencer depending if there’s a case or not, then lunch, cried in the bathroom, paperwork, avoid Spencer, return home, cried again watching Dr Who, falls asleep, woke up and repeat. That’s how you’ve been for a week, and you know how difficult it is to move on but you’re trying and thats what matters.

Knock knock

You furrowed your brows at the sound, Emily wasn’t supposed to be here until 2 PM, so why’s she visiting now at.. 11 am? You sighed as you put down your tub of ice cream and opened the door only wearing your pajamas since its sunday.

“Emily, its way to early to— Dr.Reid?” You can’t believe your eyes when you see a very nervous looking Spencer at your door, your heart still thump hard at the sight of him which you whined at inside— you still love him after everything. Damn it. You took a deep breath as you heard him say your name, before moving backwards to slam the door at his face,

“No! no no wait Y/N hear me out! please!” His voice cracks as he hold the door so you won’t have a chance to slam it in his face.

“What the fuck do you want? Is being an asshole and destroying my life enough for you?” You half yelled, as you turn around and let him see your angry tears. You were so mad at him, you hated him so much, yet you still love him just as much if not more.

“I know, i know you hate me and i deserved it. But please hear me out, you deserve explanation.” His voice are quivering, signaling he was about to cry as you chuckle darkly,

“Damn right i am. But i’m done, done with your games, i can’t keep up with you— i will never be enough and you have.. have someone so please just go and i’ll forget this will ever happen” You plead as your voice soften, you’re just exhausted, you want it to stop, you want to stop hurting. So you shoved him away before pushing the door,

“I love you! I’ve always loved you.” Your movement froze as you hear him continue, your tears still falling freely from your eyes

“The only reason why.. why i dated her is so that i can get over you. I thought.. i thought you’ll grow tired of me soon, and i don’t want to be the one who’s hurt so i.. i found her but i love you, i never stopped”

“You cant just assumed things like that Spencer! You can’t. You should’ve asked me you should’ve told me!” You’re full on yelling now as you let him in, god your neighbors is going to hate you.

“I know! I know but i never handled rejection well and you know that! everyone left me, my dad, Gideon, Morgan, Emily at one point, Hotch, and maybe my.. mom soon. I’m sorry Y/N, i really am, i’m— i’m sorry for being such a coward, for not telling you, for not—“ You cut him off with a kiss, pressing your lips against his in a desperate ‘i love you’ manner, you didn’t care, you just love him, and he could be lying but why? why would he be lying? You pulled back as you stare at him

“Have you end it?”

“5 days, 17 hours, and 28 minutes ago” You chuckled, the first time you chuckled after such a long time, as you let your head fall onto his shoulder.

“I love you too..” You whispered, causing him to hug you tightly as you both sob into each other’s arms, whispering I love you’s again and again like it’ll never be enough.

“I love you, Y/N Y/l/N, i swear.”

“I love you, sorry about calling you an asshole” You laughed nervously before he chuckled and leaned to push you on the couch, “You might have to make it up to me..” He teased, and you let out a grunt. “Fine, Blow jobs for a week anywhere you want..” His face beamed and he blushes before tickling you, “Deal, Baby.”

“Wait Spencer so does this mean—“

“Y/N, will you be the girlfriend of this asshole?” You let out a tear before nodding and tackling him to the couch to hug him tightly “yes, yes, yes i will” He kissed your lips quickly, reaching for his satchel and pull out a lilac sweater,

“I believe it’s yours”

“Like you’re mine?”

“Yours, always.”

——————

blurb requests are open! send some in, any genre is fine, and please like + reblog! if you have any constructive criticisms or feedback please private message me, thanks!

#spencer reid angst #criminal minds angst #spencer reid fluff #spencer x reader #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds fluff #spencer reid imagines #insufferableblurb

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tomtenadia · 4 years ago

Text

Island dreams

Ok, I had a moment of inspiration and i started planning a long fic... a Rowaelin Modern AU... set in Scotland. I am from Scotland so I am biased and also i love, adore the Outer Hebrides which is the location of the fic. They are amazing, incredible islands on the west of Scotland that stole my heart a few years ago.

Also, in my head in Modern AU Rowan is Scottish. There is nothing that will change my mind to do that.

Anyway... I haven’t written a long in a very long time and it’s a terrifying idea. but it just popped in my head and I had a feeling that I had to write it.

On the islands Gaelic is stilll spoken and I will use it from time to time in the fic. I hope it’s grammatically correct. It’s been year since I studied it and I am rusty. I will add a translation.

So here’s the story

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aelin is a successful doctor in London but her life in the last year has started to take an unhappy turn and she feels overwhelmed. So one day she decides to take a break from her life, book a plane to Scotland and head off to the islands in search of peace and herself as well.

Rowan has a bookstore in Stornoway, the main town in the Isle of Lewis.

Aelin is a bookworm and her first mission once in Stornoway is to find a bookstore.

Have fun reading it....

Chapter 1

Aelin was on the deck of the ferry. The frigid wind was savage against her cheeks. She tugged closer her jacket and a shiver ran down her spine. She was freezing but she had no intentions to get back inside the ferry. She had left Ullapool early that morning on her way to Stornoway on the isle of Lewis.

She needed a getaway. An escape from the busy life in London and from the bad turn her life had taken.

Without thinking, she went to grab the ring that was at her fourth finger on her left hand to then quickly realise it was not there anymore. And then remembered the reason why the band was missing. The nasty divorce she just had to go through was another reason, if not the main one, for the fact the she had now been on a ferry for almost two hours and a half.

The landscape had been breathtaking, other reason for why she was braving the cold. Once departed Ullapool, all around her there were mountains and the raw wilderness of the landscape tugged at something hidden in her. She was born and bred in London and skyscrapers, traffic and noise was all she knew. She realised she craved this: the stillness, the peace, the silence, nature.

In front of her the sea stretched peacefully and she was glad the sailing had been smooth that day. It seemed like the west of Scotland was welcoming her with a beautiful sunny day, apparently something quite unusual according to some of the people she heard speaking. The Minch, that was the name of the stretch of sea that separated mainland Scotland from the Outer Hebrides.

At the horizon she noticed land appear timidly and a big smile spread on her face. She was almost there. Her new adventure was about to start. She had taken a sabbatical from work and from her life and decided to go away. She had always been fascinated by Scotland but never had the chance to visit, albeit from London it was only an hour away by plane. So, one day she booked a one way plane ticket to Glasgow, rented a car at the airport and slowly and leisurely started to make her way north.

She had taken her time and the journey took her a week and she was already in love with the West coast of Scotland.

While in London she had bought a guide to Scotland and started doing some research and she had been fascinated by the chapter about the Western Isles or Outer Hebrides. Now she was dying to get off the boat and start exploring and living the island life.

Over the tannoy she heard the crew announcing they were approaching land. She grabbed her rucksack and made her way down below and waited in queue near the stairs to get to the car deck. She felt giddy. She hasn’t been this giddy in… she couldn’t even remember last time she had felt like this, or if she ever that way at all.

The boat was finally berthed and all tucked in at the pier and a crew member advised the car drivers that they could now access the car deck.

She went to her car and looking ahead she noticed the bow slowly opening to let the cars out. It was her first time on a ferry and even the mere disembarkation process was fascinating.

One by one all the cars in front of her were directed by the car deck crew to exit and once she was out she took her phone and set up her GPS. She had rented a place for a while and according to the landlord’s directions, once out of the terminal she had to turn right and at the junction turn right again. Her place was one of the many small detached houses along the bay. She fell in love with the house almost immediately when she saw the pictures on the ad online. It had an amazing view of the marina from the bedroom window according to the images and the description. She drove for 5 minutes and the voice told her she had arrived. She parked in the driveway and got off the car and stared at her new place for the time being. The house was painted a very light blue, a small garden at the front and a lovely blue door as a final touch. She grabbed the keys from the secret place she was told and made her way inside the building.

The house was modern and cozy. The owner clearly looked after the property and it actually felt like home. The living room had a big sofa and against the walls a couple of bookcases filled with books. She made a mental note to browse the titles later on. She wanted to explore the house first.

She moved to the next room and found the kitchen. A wonderful wooden and rustic kitchen with a big window that made the light filter in the room. In the middle a wooden table and a couple of chairs. The whole placed smelled like a forest. Her tour took her upstairs to the bedroom and the connected bathroom. The room was quite huge and had a nice king size bed again all made of wood. Childishly she let herself fall on the bed and it was amazing. The bathroom had a big shower room and again was quite modern with wood finish everywhere. The owner definitely loved the rustic style and she was not complaining. It was perfection and she already felt at home.

Her telephone rang breaking the peace and she smiled when she noticed it was her best friend Lysandra. She had been giving her a day to day account of her adventure with a massive amount of photos as well.

“I love it.” She exclaimed excited, sitting on the comfy chair at the opposite side of the bed.

“What?” Asked the woman on the other side of the line.

“This place. I just got into the house I rented and Lys, this place is marvellous. And the town… I have only seen the marina but I can so, see myself staying here.”

“And abandon London forever?” The woman sounded quite sad.

“You are the only person I would really miss, you know that.”

“Gee, I am touched.”

“Lys… the last year… well you know.” Aelin took a deep breath and lounged deeper on the chair.

“I know darling, I know. I didn’t mean that. I miss you. But I know that you needed this. You haven’t been yourself in a while.” Lysandra replied with a loving tone.

She and Lysandra had been best friends since uni. They went through med school and did their internship together and after they finished they were lucky enough to get to work in the same hospital. They both had raised the ranks pretty quickly and Lysandra had become a kickass orthopaedic surgeon and Aelin had ventured into cardio thoracic surgery. She was good at her job and loved it deeply but the last year had been literally hell for her.

She had been robbed of the chance of becoming head of the department because they gave the position to the son of the current head of the department. And that’s when she started to loose the will to do her job. She kept going on for the patients.

Then Chaol happened and their nasty divorce. Married five years and then months spent battling for divorce and papers and courts and lawyers. He told her she loved her job more than him. They fought. He told her she had changed and she was not anymore the person he married. Then he left her for another woman. As a present she had served him with divorce papers.

She heard Lysandra’s voice and realised she was woolgathering.

“What?”

“I was saying that your ex was in the A&E yesterday, with his new woman.”

“What did he do?”

“Looks like he was horse riding with her and he took a bad fall. His right leg was a big mess and I need to fix it now.” Lysandra paused for a moment “I hope it’s ok.”

“Of course Lys. He is a patient.” Aelin admitted quickly. She hated him but not to the point that she wished him to be denied care.

“He…” Lysandra was hesitant “He asked me about you.” Then she heard her friend laugh “I told her that you were off, taking a break gallivanting around Scotland and making legions of scotsmen fall in love and at you feet professing their undying love to you.”

Aelin laughed out loud at the joke.

“Leave some for me by the way…”

“What about Aedion? I thought you had the hots for him.” Aelin stood and walked to the window and opened it to let the sea breeze come in.

“I do, but I can’t be always the one to make the first move. I gave him a few very clear hints. Now it’s his turn.”

“Poor man.”

“Poor me.”

Aelin heard in the background the sound of a pager.

“Is that yours?”

“Damn yes, Ae, I gotta go. Send me loads of pictures. Love you.”

Lysandra hung up and Aelin stared at the window. The bay was peaceful, with sounds of seagulls and people going about their lives. She smiled and decided it was time to explore and most of all grab some food. She was starving. On the map she spotted a big Tesco nearby perfect for grocery shopping.

She took her backpack and left on foot. No car needed for now, she wanted to see the centre of the town.

She followed the same road she came from the terminal and saw on the corner an interesting building with huge windows and she walked toward it. She arrived and noticed it was called An Lanntair, apparently a community and arts centre with a cinema as well. She entered the place and straight in front of her she noticed a corner selling books and souvenirs. She rushed to the books. Some of them were in the other language spoken on the islands which she had learned was called Gaelic and that still quite a few people spoke. The books were interesting but not enough. She moved to one of the ladies at the counter.

“Hi, I am new here. I arrived this morning and I am out exploring. Do you happen to have a bookshop around here?”

The lady smiled warmly at her “Aye, lass… just go out here and then right on Cromwell st. and then right again. Rowan has a lovely bookshop. He is quite good and always has interesting titles. Down the road we also have a public library if you are moving here. Not as good as Rowan’s place but still worth visiting.”

“Thank you.” Aelin greeted the woman and left, curious to visit this bookstore.

She followed the directions and there it was. In front of her stood the bookstore. It had three windows, she moved closer and noticed that the main window and it had a very lovely display of children’s books with all the stories from Roald Dahl. She smiled. She loved Roald Dahl. She looked up and noticed the name of the shop “Aislingean pàipeir”. It must have been in Gaelic because she had no idea what it meant. A good excuse to chat with the owner.

She entered the shop and the doorbell rang alerting the owner of her presence. She reached the counter but no one was there. “Hello?” She called out looking around for a sign of life.

“Hi, anyone here? The door was open.”

“Tha mi a ’tighinn a-nis” said a deep voice from a corner of the shop.

The man, Rowan she assumed appeared and she almost forgot how to breathe.

He was tall. A good 1.80m, silver hair and short and eyes of the deepest green. His skin looked tanned and he had a nice healthy build. He was one of the most gorgeous man she had ever seen.

“You must be Rowan.”

------------------

Gaelic:

Tha mi a ’tighinn a-nis - I am coming now

Aislingean pàipeir - paper dreams. ( I know the name of the shop is probably lousy...sorry...)

#rowaelin #rowan whitethorn #aelin galythinius #fanfic #modern au #fluff #aedion x lysandra #lysandra

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