#love these emotionally stunted dorks

[ghostinthegallery]

Magnus Archives season 3 complete!! Well a lot certainly happened. Events sure did occur. Many of them. My goodness.

I'm obsessed with the world building. Totally recontextualized everything in such a satisfying way. 11/10.

Jon is the most endangered species on the planet. He is so bad at self preservation and also feelings. I love him with my entire being.

Oh Tim 🥺

Me in seasons 1-2: fucking Elias (derogatory)

Me in season 3: fucking Elias! (complimentary)

Guys I'm a little obsessed with Elias, he's amazing. Hilarious. So chill, such a dick. I will never forgive him for the shit he pulled on Martin but everything else was pure gold.

Oh Melanie. Glad the murder attempts didn't work. But they were funny. Until they weren't.

So when is Daisy gonna realize she's and avatar of the Hunt? I mean she's not dead she's just in a coffin. Which yes that's normally where dead people go but this is a weird staircase coffin so. That'll be fun.

Basira and the books. Handling all this surprisingly well.

Martin my sweet beloved! Go you. Burn shit down. I support you. And FEELINGS FOR JON CONFIRMED! My ship is leaving port, guys. Rough waters ahead I'm sure but this is progress and I will take it.

Fucking Peter.

Yes I did start season 4 pretty much immediately and omg Jon wanted tea when he woke up from his coma but Martin wasn't there to make it for him. I'm devastated 😭😭😭

[foxyverserambles]

John Woo is Ori core send tweet

[erthlyheavn]

attraction meme

@axcat said: ღ (for Sawyer!)

Romantic attraction: none | very low | low | medium | high | very high | extreme Sexual attraction: none | very low | low | medium | high | very high | extreme Aesthetic attraction: none | very low | low | medium | high | very high | extreme Sensual attraction: none | very low | low | medium | high | very high | extreme

[arc-misadventures]

Things Have Changed

Jaune having drinks with some old friends in, Vacuo.

Jaune: Thanks for inviting me to out with out guys, it’s really nice to catch up with you all.

Neptune: Think nothing of it man.

Sun: Yeah, its great to hang out with you.

Coco: And, you’re finally stylish enough to hang around us as well. You used to look pretty…

Neptune: Like a dork.

Sun: A total nerd.

Velvet: Guys! That’s mean!

Coco: I was going to say pedestrian, but those work too. But, now… MmHH~! Mama likey~!

Jaune: Oh… W-Well thanks, Coco.

Coco: I mean the hair makes you look so much more mature, especially with those white streaks in it.

Neptune: And, armour is more form fitting. It suits you better.

Sun: And, you’ve got some muscles on you, no more lanky self! Though I doubt you look anywhere as good as me~!

Velvet: And, that tights ass…

Jaune: Oh, thanks guys…! Wait, what was that about my butt?

Coco: You have such tight looking ass~!

JSN: …

Jaune: Okay… That’s a first…

Coco: Never had a hot girl compliment you before.

Jaune: Well yes she has, but never my butt.

Neptune: Oh? Is there some hot lady making moves on you?

Jaune: Why as a matter of fact; Yes, yes there is.

Coco: I call bullshit!

Jaune: And, why do you find that hard to believe?

Coco: No offence, Jaune, you’ve certainly gone from a two to an eight on the hotness scale. But, I seriously doubt some hot ladies are chasing after you; You may look hotter, but you’re still a dork.

Jaune: Well, you better tell that to all those, Milfs back in, Mantle that I wasn’t a hot piece of meat then.

Neptune: Bullshit! There’s no way a bunch of milfs would be after a Huntsmen-in-training.

Jaune: Oh, I’m not a student anymore.

Velvet: Well, you may have gone your own way after, Beacon fell, but you’re still a first year student.

Jaune: No I’m not. See, here’s my, Hunter’s license.

Sun: The hell?!

Coco: WHAT?! I’m still a third year in training, and you’re already a licensed, Huntsmen?! That some fucking bullshit right there!

Velvet: Well either way; Congrats on becoming a, Huntsmen, Jaune. I’m sure you do good out there.

Jaune: Thank you, Velvet. So, do you believe there is a hot lady chasing after me now?

CVSN: No.

Jaune: What?! Come on guys I’m telling the truth, honestly.

Neptune: What kind of a hot babe would be chasing after you?

Jaune: My wife for starters.

CVSN: Your what?!

Jaune: My wife. Can’t you tell I’m married? Oh wait, my gauntlet is hiding the ring. Well no matter, I’m married.

Neptune: Who the hell would marry you?!

Jaune: A lady with impeccable taste.

Coco: So… Wasn’t, Weiss then…

Neptune: Hey she’s got good taste!

Jaune: She went for a womanizer like you, I highly doubt that.

Coco: Fair point.

Neptune: Hey!

Velvet: Was it, Yang?

Jaune: No she, and Blake are dating.

Coco: They are? Good for them.

Neptune: That Ruby girl?

Coco: she doesn’t have good taste.

Sun: Ouch.

Sun: Is it, Nora?

Jaune: No she, and Ren are still a thing…

Velvet: Are they?

Jaune: Uhh…? Honestly I don’t know with those two. Ren, is so emotionally stunted it’s hard for, Nora to get through to him.

Coco: Then who is it; Who is the lucky lady to managed to bag?

Jaune: Her name is, Jinn. Jinn Arc.

Coco: Jinn eh? Pretty name. What is she like?

Jaune: Insanely smart, and knowledgeable about everything! If you guys have any secrets, secrets you haven’t told anyone about, she knows about them. Not to mentions she kind, and very curious, she loves experiencing new things. It’s so adorable seeing her reactions when she tries sometimes new. I’m so happy I married her.

Velvet: Wait, she knows our secrets?

Jaune: Every secret, anyone has every made. She knows.

Velvet: Well that’s unnerving.

Coco: How can she know out secrets if she’s never met us before?

Jaune: Well… Consider it a semblance of sorts if you will.

Coco: Sounds like a powerful semblance.

Jaune: Insanely powerful.

Neptune: Enough about her personality; What does she look like?

Coco: Yeah, what does she look like?

Jaune: Oh, she has rich ebony skin, long silky black hair, and luscious indigo eyes.

Sun: And…?

Jaune: And, what?

Neptune: Her body, what’s her body like.

Coco: Yeah. Are we working with an hourglass figure, or what?

Jaune: Oh, she was the definitive hour glass figure, it only adds to her absolute beauty that she is.

Coco: Nice~! And…?

Jaune: And… She’s thic… Like: Thic THIC~!

CSN: Nice.

Coco: But, I still think you’re lying.

Neptune: Yeah, pics or it didn’t happen!

Sun: Sorry dude, I have a hard time believing you’re married, much less to some bombshell hotty.

Velvet: Sorry, Jaune, but I find it difficult to believe too.

Jaune: Et tu, Velvet?

Velvet: Sorry.

: Well, if you want proof of, Jaune’s wife, then I’m all to happy to oblige you~!

Jaune: Ahh! Jinnnnnnnnnnn…

Velvet: Wait, your wife is actually hereeeeeeeeeee…?!

Neptune: Who is crazy enough to marryyyyyyyyyyyyyy…?!

Sun: What, that’s bullshiiiiiiiiiiiiii…??

Coco: …

Jaune: Nnnn…?! Ahh sorry I get lost in a trance when I look at…?! Coco! Your nose is bleeding!

Coco: Hello, Mommy~!

Jinn: My oh my. Such charmers aren’t you~?

Jaune: W-What are you doing here? Didn’t you say you needed a rest. And, more importantly; what’s with that lustrous outfit?

Jinn: Oh, this~? It’s rather hot here so I decided to wear something a little more… breezy~! Do you not like it?

Jaune: I love it! But, don’t wear it in public again. Too many people are gazing lustrously at what’s mine…

Jinn: Ohh I love it when you get dominant with me~! Now as for your other questions; I was resting in our room, but it’s so lonely back there all alone… I wanted my beloved knight to come back, and… comfort me~! Can you do that dear, please~?

Jaune: C-Certainly! Bye guys, husband duties are calling!

Jinn: We’ll chat later everyone. We’re going to be quite busy soon. Oh, and Coco?

Coco: Yes…?

Jinn: Be a good girl, and you can join us later, okay~?

Coco: O-Okay…

Jinn: Good. Bye everyone~!

CVSN: Bye…

CVSN: …

Sun: Holy shit! She’s real?!

Neptune: And, hot as hell!

Velvet: She’s the most beautiful woman, I’ve ever seen before in all my life!

Coco: H-How did she know I wanted to join them in a threesome?! I didn’t say anything?!

Velvet: I think the nosebleed said something about that.

Coco: Like that says, ‘I wanna bang you.’ I was just registering how hot she is!

Sun: And, she’s married to, Jaune?!

Neptune: How did that blond goofball land such a hot babe?!

Velvet: Must have been the hair.

Coco: His hair is really alluring.

Sun: It’s better than, Neptune’s.

Neptune: Dude?!

[callmearcturus]

Mission Impossible: a Crazed Ramble by tentacledwizard

Re my mission impossible ask: gonna share my thoughts bc I just finished watching the series (sans 2 and 3) and boy do I have Thoughts. I think I’ll cover the ones I’m most interested in (Ghost Protocol, Rogue Nation, and Fallout) though I might ramble at u about 1 and 7 later lmao. So okay here we go

Ghost Protocol. I REALLY liked this one. This is 2nd on my ranking of MI movies.

This movie has the best team vibes. Might be my favorite iteration of The Team, even if Luther isn’t really there. I just got really emotionally attached to these guys and their interactions lmao..

I liked Brandt. Jeremy Renner didn’t have to do some heavy-duty acting for this role, and he didn’t. His role was to be small and cute and tormented, and it worked. So well that I mumbled “where is my wife” when I watched Fallout, and my brother looked at me strangely. 

Jane Carter holy moly. Dude you were NOT kidding about Jane Carter. I love her so much. I love how she’s not even slightly the love interest, how her and Ethan’s interactions have this respect and camaraderie, and even when they kiss it’s not romantic. It’s great. Loved how she got the dudely “gotta avenge my dead wife” backstory with her boyfriend getting killed, and how that propels her most ruthless actions. I guess I’m pretty much agreeing with everything you’ve said about Jane lmao. SHE’S GREAT. Also loved it when she fought Léa Seydoux, it was pretty cathartic. Let female characters be driven and reckless and (eyes Rose Lalonde pfp) yeah

Benji Dunn the man that you are. Okay I’d say that Benji is at his best in the next movie, but this is a damn good introduction. He’s newly promoted, a little bit out of his depth, and I’m a sucker for funny nerdy sidekicks okay. Gonna talk about him some more when I get to Rogue Nation probably.

Ethan Hunt has the best haircut in this film. Idk man that’s my Ethan Hunt commentary. Oh wait it was also funny when he wore the mustache

I GOT ALL FLUSTERED WHEN LÉA SEYDOUX WAS ON SCREEN. I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS IS. HOW PECULIAR

Didn’t watch 2 and 3, so the brief glimpse of Julia was very intriguing and bittersweet. Then of course in Fallout she Julias all over the place!

OKAY NOW I CAN TALK ABOUT THE BURJ KHALIFA

I’ve actually seen the Burj Khalifa irl and it is SO TALL (I know, very surprising) so I cannot wrap my head around the fact that this scene was shot on location (??) I need to look into that more.

I am a dork and I do not know much about how stunts and action scenes are calibrated, hence the sheer delight I derived from the way the camera moves in the Burj Khalifa scenes. Also my hands got really sweaty during the first half. (The “blue is glue, red is dead” part reminded me of “hasta lasagna don’t get any on ya” IDK MAN)

I spent the wall-climbing section gazing at the TV rapturously and occasionally mumbling “uh oh,” “Ethan Hunt: Human Gecko” or “the climberrrr” alternately. I literally was not hearing myself because I was watching so intently. My breath was BATED lmao.

And like I’d seen the gif sets, I knew he was gonna jump but I didn’t know when. So when Ethan does jump, it’s so sudden that you can’t help but go :O !! And it works. Anddd that’s my favorite stunt in the film (i am an easily impressed nerd with no technical knowledge but i AM dying on this hill. The Burj jump would impress ANYONE and for good reason)

I am replaying this scene in my head over and over. It’s just. It’s so good. My reaction to it reminded me of when I watched [S] Descend and it just Worked and I was amazed. To say nothing of Cascade lmao. Actually yeah this kind of is Cascade in a sense

I'm sure none of this commentary  is really original, but I really love it when Tom Cruise does a big jump heh. I am a simple man

So yeah this film is easily my 2nd favorite. It’s character-driven, there’s comedy elements, the way the team interacts and collides and argues with each other is wonderful. And I believe in Jane Carter supremacy.  

Oh yeah, Bogdan was funny too. So many good + funny moments here :D

Wait how could I forget the best character (the Russian man who has an enemies-to-friends arc with Ethan)? Love that guy.

OKAY this is too long so Im gonna separate this into 2 parts.

they sent three asks and then I responded, we're gonna use a cut here, LONG POST!!!!!

@tentacledwizard PART 2.

Rogue Nation. This one’s my favorite! I like how it begins not with Ethan but with the Team, because their interactions are good. And of course Ethan’s trying to jump on a plane. Just another Saturday.

I am not very good at talking about plot so let’s talk about Benji Dunn

ok wait first I gotta say that I like how they played with the usual IMF message. The “we ARE the syndicate” got me. Really good moment, and I bet if I rewatched it I’d catch all the little details that made me suspicious of whoever was talking. 

Anyway Benji Dunn.. the man that you are…

Like I said, Benji is at his best in this movie. There’s so many little moments that cement his greatness. He’s gaming on company time! He lies about not being Ethan’s friend on a daily basis :( also the sincere dorky smile he does on his way to the opera is so wonderful. 

I really like how sincere Benji is. He’s genuinely looking forward to the opera, and he’s eager to wear a mask someday, and he cares about Ethan so much. Yeah he’s a funny little British man but he’s also v sweet and you can see why Ethan goes crazy and kidnaps the prime minister to get him back. 

speaking of, I really think that Benji and Ethan’s relationship is… if not the core of the movie, it’s definitely a major part of that core. Does that make sense? Like, I tried to take a picture of the screen every time Ethan and Benji glanced at each other knowingly, and I ended up with a lot of pictures. Even with the 6-month separation (Ethan with a beard is something I never thought I’d see), they know each other. Ethan knows Benji wants to see the opera, and Benji will yell at Ethan when Ethan needs to be yelled at. Ethan compliments Benji’s tuxedo (as he should).

Also ffffuck whenever these guys worry about each other… like when Benji tells Ethan he’s probably going to take it too far one of these days.. Man. The scene where Ethan washes out of the giant torus with Ilsa and Benji goes to talk to him is so good.

oh and yeah Ethan did kidnap the prime minister. For benji. HE DID THAT!!!

Also the scene where Benji is forced to speak for Solomon was honestly incredible, it was like Ethan and Benji were having their own separate conversation with eye contact. When Ethan briefly put his hand on Benji’s shoulder, maybe to reassure him without having to talk, and Benji glances up at him… that’s good stuff right there. When Benji was finally able to talk it was cathartic. God I love these two

Plus the opera fight scene is so fun oh my god.

ok let’s talk about my queen Ilsa Faust

Ilsa Faust is great, and I really like how this series does female characters. Because she has her own shit going on, there’s a bit of romance between her and Ethan but they’re both agents with missions, and she’s never sexualized. I love that. Her signature move is filmed the way a male character would be filmed if he were fighting. That’s awesome.

I really loved Rebecca Ferguson’s performance here, the conflict between saving others and saving herself was neat. It’s also interesting how she has way less reservations about killing people, which plays off Ethan’s… everything. And she never makes it easy for Ethan, which I’d honestly do too if I was involved in the shit she has to deal with. 

But of course there are moments that show she does care about him (asking him to run away, the scene where she saves him in the underwater whirly spinner). The hug was pretty sweet.

Also, Ilsa is when I started really paying attention to the outfits in MI, because all of her looks were great. The yellow dress is iconic, and I REALLY liked the pleated coat she wears when talking to Solomon Lane. Plus the suit she wears in Fallout is Good.

Solomon Lane is a good villain. Jim is the MI villain I think of when I think of MI villains, but Solomon is very distinctive. I mean that voice, man. The VOICE. Lmao. He kind of reminded me of a parasitic worm made human, which is a 100% good thing.

So who has the more distinctive and weird voice? Solomon or Claire? That is the question. (I think it’s Claire tbh. Four am, four in the morning, four o clock)

So this is my favorite MI film. It’s fun, it has a good villain. We see Ethan’s personality start to shine through, too- he’s emotionally driven, as evidenced by when he fucking DOES ALL THAT TO SAVE BENJI GOD I LOVE THESE TWO. So yeah, this is the Ethan and Benji movie to me. It’s also a stellar debut for Ilsa Faust… wait what do you mean she gets fridged in the 7th movie. What do you mean

OH Jeremy Renner is still here! And more Luther! Hell yeah.

really want to rewatch this one so I can take more notes on the stunts and stuff, too

Ok time to make a part 3 because this is ridiculously long

PART 3

Fallout. Oh man. This one messed me up. 

So from the start, Fallout is a darker, queasier watch than the previous two. The more I watched, the more I realized that this movie Is Ethan Hunt’s Nightmare.

Like there’s the straightforward nightmare at the beginning, and then the film just Doesn’t Stop. It keeps messing with our minds again and again. 

This is the Ethan Hunt movie. This is our deep dive into Ethan Hunt’s mind, and at some points it kind of feels like a test of how well we know him- because he wouldn’t kill all those people, so this must be another nightmare, right? 

I am used to vivid nightmares, and this film perfectly captures the sheer horror of having one. And I was constantly doubting my own perception, bouncing between bad dream and reality along with Ethan. Man.

Like Mission Impossible has always kind of had that element, what with the masks and everything, but this film dials it up to eleven. I recognized the horror of Ethan’s situation here, and it was a feeling that stayed with me the entire time.

I mean at some points, it gets surreal. The line about Ethan literally being his own worst enemy (it’s true!), his wife showing up in little glimpses until she finally appears, Lane pinpointing Ethan’s fears, etc. When Ethan looks around at the church and says he’s terribly sorry, it’s such a small moment but it’s still kind of a gut punch. Ethan Hunt is trapped in his brain and so are we.

Even the title sequence shows everything burning around Ethan. The full theme song sounds like it’s going to end, but then it keeps going. This movie feels way more apocalyptic than any of the others.

Even Max is dead. I mean come on.

And we see how this screws up Ethan’s judgment, how his priorities are a little fucked in the grand scheme of things. He puts a few people over millions, for better or for worse.

Ethan Hunt running is an iconic part of the franchise, but what happens when all the messed-up stuff he went through catches up with him? What about the fallout?

So when the ending rolls around, it feels like Ethan is waking up, and that lends it a certain catharsis. But the uneasiness of most of the movie still stuck with me for a long time afterward.

Okay let’s talk about the new characters.

Alanna was neat, and I liked her outfits too. Though every time she flirted with Ethan, I had this vivid mental image of Ethan driving up and yelling “I fucked your mom, shit lips!” Probably something he’d say to Zola instead though.

Walker was such an asshole and that was kind of great actually. Not a single redeeming quality to be found. Have fun falling off that cliff, johnny boy.

Oh yeah and he got to say the only “fuck” in the entire series I believe. (It should have been Ethan. Well I can always hope.)

That conversation Ethan and Benji have about how Ethan won’t let anything happen to him, but then later Ethan does something that seems to put Benji in danger (making him be Solomon Lane)? Chef’s kiss. Also Benji FINALLY got to wear the mask, and he’s damn good at it.

More of Ilsa and Ethan’s relationship and man is it complicated haha. I like the scene where they’re walking through a symmetrical landscape, just paralleling each other, until finally they’re face to face. That’s good stuff right there. Also the scene where he’s in the hospital bed was sweet.

My wife [Brandt] is not here but luckily we get a lot of Luther. Luther is the constant in this series- he’s stuck with Ethan from the beginning, for better or for worse. (Better, because he’s a good character). So Luther really cares about Ethan, evidenced by his conversation with Ilsa. He probably knows Ethan better than anyone, except maybe Julia but then again she and Ethan have been apart for a while. 

Julia was great. The scenes with her and Ethan were v bittersweet. They still care about each other (just look at Ethan’s constant guilt over not protecting her), but she’s living her own life now. The conversation they had near the end was the culmination of all this, the moment we were waiting for. Plus I enjoyed her friendship with Luther, like I enjoyed Ilsa and Benji’s friendship. The scene where they’re cutting the wires/talking about Ethan was cute.

as for the stunts, hmm… I didn't really get the level of physicality I got from, say, MI1 or Ghost Protocol. Idk man maybe I’m just biased against helicopters?

ALSO I really like Face/Off and Hit Man so the John Lark thing was p cool to me. Ofc John was the asshole CIA agent though.

Anyway good movie, might take some time before I can rewatch it but it’s a masterful delve into Ethan Hunt’s mind. Not my favorite but also really really good and I wrote the most about it.

Conclusion. Wow that’s a lot of thoughts. Probably too many to put in one ask. Uh I kind of also want to talk about MI1 and Dead Reckoning as an echo of MI1 but this was a lot so idk if you’d want me to do that lmao. Anyway I have to thank you for convincing me to watch Mission Impossible all those months ago, because it is one of my obsessions now. (If you read all this I am sorry lmao, hope it wasn’t boring tho) 

And now I can finally read your Benthan fic! 8D hell yeah.

okay now it is my turn to reply

I frankly adore Brandt. I've joked to Brandt that I don't really ship Benthan, I just use it as a vehicle to write William Brandt and have him tell jokes. I adore his angry little bureaucratic ass. I am actually a fan of Renner when the material gives him actual shit he can do. Like, he was fucking WASTED in the MCU and the "Hawkeye" miniseries proves he could have been having fun this entire fucking time but they never GAVE him anything. And even if his role in MI is simple, McQuarrie is so damn good at writing characters that Brandt feels vibrant. In GP he goes from sad sweater boy to lowkey the weakest link of the team but everyone is there to help him. And in RN there's a THOUSAND lil moments I love with him. I always point to Benji's interrogation scene, there's a VERY VERY PRECISE bit of editing where Benji is going off on a tirade about how the CIA sucks, and the camera lingers on Brandt LITERALLY JUST LONG ENOUGH for Renner's mouth to make this tiny microexpression, like TWO FRAMES of Brandt indulging in admiring Benji's lie-craft.

Also the argument in the bigass car with Luther was Renner improvising according to McQ. Love it. Brandt's my angry little pencil-pushing angel. Any time he shows up in the PT AU, I'm 😍😍😍

GP lives and dies on the team dynamic tbh, which I find hilarious bc imo MI3 was pronounced dead on arrival bc the team dynamic is non-existent and like, why am I even here???? the chemistry is truly batshit.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE ALL THE TRULY MIND-BOGGLING FACTS BEHIND THE BURJ CLIMB AND HOW TERRIFYINGLY PRACTICAL IT WAS check out this post

Also Ethan's gorgeous LEAP at the end of the sequence is my second-fave Physicality Moment in that movie. The first is of course Ethan's silent vault over the railing after he leaves his prison cell. I'm a slut.

and I bet if I rewatched it I’d catch all the little details that made me suspicious of whoever was talking.

oh you want a fun one? in the record shop, there are two listening booths. ethan goes into the one on the left.

Solomon Lane is sitting in the one on the right.

re: Benji in Rogue Nation, I mean McQuarrie himself has said Simon Pegg as Benji Dunn is the beating heart and soul of the Mission franchise. so don't worry, we ALL stan.

ILSA FUCKING FAUST. /fans face. Yeah, the way MI handles women is like… I don't know how to go back to, like, James Bond films. I keep remembering Skyfall (which I remember as a good movie) and how one of the ~bond girls~ is casually executed and the whole point is how unfazed everyone is, how DISPOSABLE she is, how James Bond as a franchise wants backpats for pointing out "man it sure sucks how disposable women are in these spy flicks huh"

smash cut to Ghost Protocol, Rogue Nation, Fallout, and ESPECIALLY Dead Reckoning.

I keep saying this but MI manages to pull off the Metal Gear thing in that the Male Gaze of the camera is thoroughly bisexual. Long before we see Ilsa's amazing leg shot at the opera, we get a long lingering shot of Ethan's tiddies, and the way he's held captive is very female-coded, the position, the way he tries to wile his way out of it, the barefoot thing, all of it. There's such intense intentionality with how MI frames bodies.

Hell, I've been flicking between MI and the X-Men AU movies and comparing Ilsa to Mystique is super interesting because both of them fight with their legs-first. But the choreography of Mystique always has this "heh heh heh naked legg" feeling, while with Ilsa, her fighting style is so consistent, it feels like a natural result of her build and how she utilizes momentum. I remember there's a fast moment in Fallout where she very casually assists Ethan by taking out a guard as he extracts Alanna, and she does her leg flip thing. It feels Correct for her, rather than the MCU "make sure you fight pretty" bullshit.

Anyway I love Ilsa but Benji is actually the Love Interest in RN and we all know it.

"wait what do you mean she gets fridged in the 7th movie" SHE DOES NOT GET FRIDGED i am gonna die on this fucking hill, that Ilsa's death was good and actually meant something

Anyway I cosign all your thoughts on Fallout. I think it's the best movie and frankly I think it's a cinematic masterpiece. The claustrophobia of it, the nightmare of being Ethan Hunt, the repeated use of dreamlike imagery to convey that we're falling further into that nightmare with him, AND THE ENDING. I find the ending so bittersweet because yes, Ethan and the team pull it off, they push at the edges of possibility and reason until the universe yields and gives them the win

but then Julia says "I know you'll always be there" and its like watching a door slam in Ethan's face. He's always going to be in this dream/nightmare, a world that exists one layer removed from reality, and he can't get out. It's amazing. I want to kiss McQ on the mouth.

That Ilsa-Ethan scene was not in the original script and TC suggested it day-of and they just did it and its one of the most beautiful shots of the movie, with the green trees melding with the slight green tones of Ilsa's outfit and with Ethan's eyes. The fact they have an entire conversation between Ethan and Ilsa's eyebrows. I love them.

[toastywarmth]

I honestly find the comparison between Movie!Adrien and Show!Adrien kinda hilarious. Most people dislike Movie!Adrien, which is a bit understandable, but there are people who portray him as this misogynist asshole, when really…he was just acting like an ordinary teenage boy.

People dunk on him for calling Marinette weird on their first meeting, but it’s not like he said it to her face, or had any malicious intend. It was more like in a “huh, that was strange” kind of way.

The people who say he has lost his kindness have not payed attention to the movie. We literally get a scene in the movie where Adrien compliments Marinette for her fashion and is friendly towards her. He even told Marinette about his mother in the montage, he obviously has a level of respect towards her.

I am not saying Movie!Adrien is a perfect character, because he is far from it. I do have my fair share of problems with the movie’s version of Chat Noir however, like how he was a bit antagonistic towards Ladybug after the rejection (in a middle of a freaking battle, I mind you), but I still prefer him over the show’s version, maybe because I have a preference towards overconfident characters who are secretly dorks.

Also, I can’t help but laugh at the people who think that Show!Adrien can handle rejection better than Movie!Adrien. Have you SEEN Kero Neko, or any moment in the show where Ladybug specifically mentions how she’s in love with someone else, and Chat Noir still continues to flirt with her?

Both boys are as emotionally stunted as they come, and I love them for it.

[sunwarmed-ash]

Tumblr Prompt Series (newest at bottom)

these masterlists are really just my adhd way of organizing everything into similar piles lol. As I get more and finish the three in my inbox, I'll post them here!

Prompt from druzycherryquartz: Wincest but they commit dual suicide

Whats going to be left of the world if you're not in it?: Explicit, wincest, heavy angst

Prompt from @rockabye-billy and song by Halsey

Eastside: Explicit, Steddiegrove, heavy angst

Prompt from @strangebrainrot: Gavin Reed. Man needs glasses but Refuses because of course he does, but he has a secret pair of readers for home use

Gavin needs glasses: T, Hankconvin, funny

Prompt from anon: I bet gavin fell into a comatose cus of the grimace shake

The infamous Grimace Shake: G, Hankconvin, funny

Prompt from @strangebrainrot: I firmly believe Gavin volunteers at the local animal shelter to help take care of the cats. The shelter staff do have to keep him away from prospective adopters cause he's still Gavin.

Detroit Cat Cafe: G, Hankconvin, funny, cute

Prompt from @tentoriumcerebelli: Gavin has quite the collection of fantasy dildos 😈

Secret Box: Explicit, Hankconvin, dragon dildos, sex

Prompt from @sweeteatercat Hankvin, topping from the bottom 😈🔥

Tantrum: explicit, bratty gavin, top Hank, rough sex

Prompts from Anon(s): RoyJamie, Coach kink, nipple piercings, nipple worship

Insatiable Tartt: Season 3 fill in scenes, coach kink, bottom Jamie, jamie has nipple piercings

Angst Prompt Requests (tumblr poll)

'You called me friend': Jamie Tartt-prompt from @novelbear, roy/jamie relationship angst, sad Jamie, dummo emotionally stunted roy kent

My love language is misery: Gavin Reed-*SA trigger warning* hurt/comfort, gavin goes to Hanks' post assault

Neverender: Billy Hargrove-*Suicidal ideation trigger warning* post harringrove, post season 4, Billy and Eddie live, supportive Eddie Munson, depressed Billy Hargrove

Prompt from @thediktatortot: Snow | Cold Fingers & Warm Lips, ST ships

Here (In Your Arms): Mungrove, PWP, flirting, kissing, anal sex, safe sex, cold fingers warm lips, spit kink, finger sucking, hair pulling

Prompt from @double-dorks-beanie: Vampire!Billy, Enemies to lovers harringrove, blood drinking, bicurious steve

Vain for my blood: Harringrove, frottage, PWP, blood drinking

Prompt from @tentoriumcerebelli: Harringriveson pool party, for this hot summer weather!

HOT TO GO!: harringroveson, boys flirting, pre-slashish

[the-astralalchemist]

i like bullying wodime in a different way than i love bullying kadoc

kadoc is kinda like my emotionally stunted blorbo that i want to bully and just get him a sandwich and some therapy yk

but wodime is kinda a dork and innocently dumb about certain things, he's a squishy wizard man that doesn't know basic internet safety!!! i feel like i couldn't bully him into giving me his lunch money bc he would just give me it

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Omg tsunade being the one to curse kakashi is so sad 😭 she is the most excited when gai shows up bc she has a feeling he is gunna be the one to break the curse

Tsunade is vouching for these two dorks.

The only problem is that Kakashi is very emotionally stunted after everything that has happened, but he’s working on it. He’s trying.

She also kinda wishes his parents were there to see it all happening because she knows they would love it. They’d adore Gai as much as Dai seems to adore Kakashi, and Sakumo would tease Kakashi relentlessly about his crush

[ohcaptnmycaptn]

IT IS MY BIRTHDAY AND MY BIG BROTHER POSTED ME A JAMIE BENN JERSEY CAUSE HE CANT BE HERE AND I JUST 💛💛💛💛

[fleurdulys]

You know when jaime's half drunk ass said to brienne "i've never slept with a knight before" what he meant was "i've never slept with anyone so honourable and so brave and so kind before" like that was an acknowledgement of brienne's qualities but also an acknowledgement of his own awkwardness and insecurity. He never slept with anyone better than Brienne before.

[niicevibe]

𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐔𝐫𝐲𝐮 + 𝐘/𝐍 𝐇𝐂𝐬

Aw, Uryū. Lil dork. I love him. I can’t wait to see him animated in TYBW!! Genuinely hoping they don’t change his seiyū, I’ll cry. I'm grateful that his English voice in the live action movie stayed the same-- so, so grateful.

I... think I fell back in love with Uryū with this. Anyway. Bedtime now. It's just about 6am.

𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲@toofilthy (I'm sorry this took a bajillion years!)

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: none; uhhhhh Y/N is a "medical associate" (I'm leaving this vague here-- you wanna be a doc? a nurse? a houseman? go ahead and choose whateva); mentions of death

𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

Though he would deny it to his last breath, like Ichigo Kurosaki, Uryū Ishida is a prude. Of course, he'd instead call it "being a gentleman", that it'd be against his strong morals and probably his Quincy pride to treat someone or view them as any less or behave as a depraved man.

Considering who raised him (and who didn't), it's no surprise that Uryū became a highly respectful individual.

He, too, unfortunately and also like Ichigo, has also adopted the cool guy persona (though he'd likely argue this, too). His strong sense of justice, mixed with a bit of ego and that Quincy pride-- perhaps this has been why he's remained a bachelor for so long.

If not by his own choice, of course...

Naturally, the man's been busy. At the very least, his lack of personal time wasn't due to any new enemies or wars. After he graduated from high school, Uryū spent six years focusing on his medical school studies and has been working for his father at Karakura Hospital. He's dedicated, sincere, and has always had good bedside manner.

Undoubtedly, before his mother's passing, he was a "mama's boy". A lot of his mannerisms and his personality was structured around hers, and with Kanae being a former maid, he is contentedly reserved.

Naturally, he'd probably be one of the best partners to have.

And naturally, you realized this, too.

An associate of Karakura Hospital, the raven-haired, bespectacled man has caught your eye on numerous occasions. Rarely did your paths ever directly cross, but when it happened, you did your best not to be so... starstruck?

Truly the perfect man.

He's caught you staring, of course. Maybe it's that you do it too unobviously, but he's extremely perceptive, anyway, so even trying to be discreet might not work out.

Concerned that your head's not in the right mindset, he'll question you for your well-being. Maybe you'll speak fluently in fluster at him, or maybe it shows in the change of colour in your cheeks or by the light in your eyes, the embarrassment of your sudden change in demeanour.

He's confused, but now he's a little flustered, himself.

Why are you looking at him so intensely? You're really not meaning to do it but it's gotten distracting for Uryū. Even after you'd finished your business with him for the day, he's still thinking about that exchange of yours and his.

Now, whenever he arrives at work, he's keeping an eye out for your presence in the hospital. Now, he questions himself on whether he's looking out for you as a good thing or a bad thing.

He realizes it eventually, when you've intentionally crossed paths with him and offered him a treat and a coffee from the café during one of his breaks--

It's a good thing.

To himself, he notes it being unfortunate that your paths don't cross more often, such is the casualty of your chosen careers. As short as they sometimes are, your conversations have finally exited the awkward phase.

Until, of course, one of his colleagues point out that he's finally showing some kind of interest in something other than his work for the first time. The emotionally stunted part of him that's unaffected by his cool guy persona has him silent through his embarrassment.

Sure, he's been dedicated to his career-- he's not embarrassed by that. Contrary to that aforementioned persona, Uryū cares what people think of him, and that hasn't exactly changed from high school obviously.

But you're quick to shut down his colleague and their poor effort at a joke at his expense.

"I think his dedication to his patients and the hospital is wonderful. Your own bedside manner is kind of lacking, though. It makes sense how you didn't make department chief."

It takes a lot out of Uryū to not react. He doesn't disagree with your statement at all (how did you know that, anyway?). Most of all, he's touched that you'd come to his defence so quickly, even though the two of you had but a few meaningful conversations in the past few weeks.

Your casual run-ins during shifts turn into coffee dates up in the café on the fifth floor when you invite him to join you on your breaks. You admit to him what you believe to be a bit of a funny story, that you've seen him running around Karakura, and even jumping across rooftops, a bow in hand.

A part of him is somehow relieved that you're able to see and sense spiritual pressure. Given that Karakura Town remains an Enriched Spirit Zone, it's neither common nor uncommon-- but it provides him with a strange sense of comfort. Like, if anything involving the world of Quincy and Hollows and Soul Reapers ever happened to become involved with you--

Wait. Why am I even thinking this far ahead?

Uryū Ishida would be a huge overthinker. Considering he's never bothered to pursue a relationship over the past decade, or even in high school, it is uncharted waters.

Being around you... makes him nervous.

Hilariously enough, Uryū's father would somehow catch the latest gossip about "the director's son" and semi-consciously tune in whenever his son's name is mentioned.

Romantically, and even sometimes platonically, Uryū wouldn't be the first person to make any sort of move. Whether or not you wanted to be in a romantic relationship or not, you'll have to be straightforward and blunt. It's not that Uryū wouldn't realize what was happening, but there's a necessity to be straight up with him on what you're looking for so his hopes don't get too high.

Out of fear that he might not be good at dating, Uryū would definitely be one to want to take things slow. He knows he likes you, but he simply needs time to come to terms with and work out his feelings for you.

His friends are extremely fond of you, especially Orihime, who is quick to invite the two of you to dinner when it's found out that Uryū is seeing someone.

Of course, it only happened after Ichigo discovered you two having lunch at the hospital. Being the local interpreter, he's typically who is called in to the hospital for English to Japanese translating.

It's not like he was intending on keeping you as some big secret, but there were several factors he had to keep in mind about becoming serious in the relationship.

Eventually, he'd have to tell you about him being a Quincy, and what Hollows are; he'd have to explain how necessary it is that you're paying attention to your surroundings, as you having spiritual energy is a magnet for them.

Maybe it's in his strategic nature, but Uryū quickly becomes greatly in-tune with how you express your emotions.

There's a fifty percent chance that he'll confront you head on about it. The other fifty percent is Uryū suffering in silence and waiting for a ball to drop while he backtracks and retraces his steps, and just mulling over whether he'd been the reason for your sour mood.

But he's more worried for your sake and not his-- he just wants to figure out if it's something he needs to fix or if it's something you just need time to think about. Either way, he'll be quick to offer a helping hand or a shoulder to cry on.

If it's another person at fault, he'll be pissed off right along with you.

Remember that Uryū isn't as straight-laced as he looks. He did beat up an entire gang that showed up in front of Karakura just for blocking the entranceway. Back then, however, he'd gotten away with it. Now, well, it's kind of difficult to beat up someone when you've sworn an oath to do no harm.

The sentiment is there, though. And maybe it cheers you up a little, a small laugh spared to his half-hearted offer of smacking the person around a little.

No, Uryū would sit down with you and have you vent to him about the situation to calm you down, and if it calls for it, he'll help you work out the situation logically.

While he's not against public displays of affection, he has his limits. Not only due to his position as one of the hospital's top doctors, but his nervous, prudish nature would have him flustered.

He loves holding your hands. And, vice versa. Maybe it's just some strange coincidence why his hands are just so perfect for the task.

You could be years into your relationship, but simply reaching for him, any part of him, has his cheeks turning pink.

He seldom mentions it unless you press the matter, but he loves physical contact with you. Uryū didn't receive much of it when he was younger, notably from his father, and his mother passed away when he was young. He was left to Ryūken's more distant methods of raising a child, and it wasn't so often that he could spend time with his grandfather thanks to his views on his fellow Quincy. So, he might just melt into your hands, squeezing them just a little tighter, holding you to him just a little closer.

Pull him aside while he's working, down a quiet hallway, or into an unlocked supply room or an on-call room. He appreciates these spontaneous "abduction attempts" you provide him with, stealing him away when it's obvious he's struggling. He'd be stubborn and refuse to step away on his own, preferring to delve back into his work.

It's too easy to tell when he's having a harder day than usual-- a case's situation gone sour; the loss of a patient. Most days, it's just your presence being enough to soothe his aching heart and mind. He'll never say no to receiving a massage from you, having fallen in love with your hands and with them being on him.

Unless you're worse off than him, you'd be more likely to make any kind of risque moves in the relationship. Teasing Uryū would be neutrally received, enjoying the attention from you but being as equally as embarrassed (depending on the form of teasing, of course).

If he has time in his busy schedule, he has another persona as a househusband. Your own personal tailor, chef, and doter-- Uryū loves being able to take care of you. The both of you have done your best to rearrange your schedules to at least be aligned to have one day off a week that you both can be home together for a bit of normalcy.

You love your work, as does he, but sometimes the both of you find yourselves depressed when that single aimed day is untenable due to the nature of your positions.

You often express your pride to Uryū for doing so well and being such an incredible doctor and a loving partner. And the smile he gives you in return for your kind words is enough to wash away any sadness or doubts.

© niicevibe | please don’t repost! reblogs appreciated ♥️

[maxlewiinsky-blog]

“Now, I’m not sayin’ this because I’m calling him out. But... Jacob Sternwood is a jealous shit that can’t admit he gets jealous.”

[early2000smovieimagines]

Meeting and Dating Ron Weasley

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

- Technically, you and Ron didn’t meet until fourth year but the redheaded boy had been in love with you since the moment he saw you, which was during first year at the magical school. 

- While he was certainly too shy to approach you, he did do quite a bit of staring and talking to Harry about you; though he tried to pretend as though he couldn’t care less every time he realized how in love he sounded. 

- So fourth year comes around and he’s still just as infatuated with you; and just as emotionally stunted about it, as ever. But then, it happens.  

“Hey Ginny.” 

- You waved at the redheaded girl as you passed with a few of your friends, causing her older brother to stare at her as though she’d suddenly sprouted another head. 

“How do you know y/n y/l/n?!” Ron immediately asked after you were far away enough not to hear. 

- He spent the rest of their walk questioning her as to how she knew you and how you met and if you were close and blah, blah, blah. Ginny only got him to lay off after she started teasing him for being in love with you, but even then he still sent a few hesitant questions her way, all the while insisting he wasn’t all that interested. 

- Ginny is very pleased with her newfound power. It was like the cat who got the canary the first time she brought you over and introduced you to her blushing brother. Ron could have killed her yet “kissed” her at the same time; not literally.

- Even though you now know each other and are on friendlier terms, he’s still nervous and awkward around you. He’s always messing up his words, stuttering, tripping over things, staring, etc. He’s awful with women if you weren’t aware.

- And yet, you still seem to like him, and over time he does start to relax, even though he still has his moments.

- Ron never actually asks you out, you just sort of have a silent agreement. You start to spend more alone time together, you don’t date anyone else, you share awkward yet almost tender moments, etc. Your relationship status is later solidified with a; long awaited, kiss and a kiss alone.

- Ron is very much so a spontaneous “I’m just gonna kiss her and deal with the consequences later” type of person. He’s bad at expressing his feelings with words so he’ll do it with his actions, and he’ll do it quickly before he has the chance to stop himself; usually after a surge of emotions.

- So, in typical Ron fashion, he heard some guy mention how he was thinking about asking you out, and realized that you never did establish that the two of you were an item. He immediately started to think about how much he’d hate to see you with another guy and how much he cared about you.

- Because of that, he was quite distracted when he finally saw you again. He fidgeted and seemed to be lost in his own thoughts as you walked together but just as you were thinking about saying something to him, he turned and laid one on you.

- Although you were a bit flustered and certainly very surprised, you kissed back and smiled at him as the two of you pulled away.

“I’ve been waiting to do that.” He admitted, his less confident personality returning as a blush creeped its way onto his cheeks.

- It’s in that moment that you’ve realized that you’ve fallen in love with a dork. A wonderful, beautiful dork.

- Though it tends to make him flustered, Ron is definitely a fan of pda. In the beginning of your relationship, he’s a bit defensive about it, like when his friends chuckle at you kissing his cheek or make faces at him while he’s got his arm wrapped around you, but he learns to ignore it and just brush them off. 

- Handholding. 

- Leaning your head on his shoulder. Perhaps it’s because it’s you initiating a type of affection or because it shows that you’re comfortable with him, but either way, he loves it. 

- Hugs. That’s all this boy wants. Just wrap your arms around him and let him hold you close goddamnit!

- You giving him kisses on the cheek; or anywhere else? Unparalleled. Never stop. 

- Abrupt, passionate kisses. 

- Snogging. He’s certainly a bit clumsy at first but you don’t mind; you probably are too. 

- He has a few select terms of endearment that he likes to use: darling, sweetheart, woman, my girlfriend. He doesn’t mind pet names but please stick to a simple “babe” or “honey” and not something like “won won” (shudders). 

- Ron sleeps on his back most of the time so you’ll just usually lay your head on his chest while he wraps his arms around you. That being said, he isn’t particular about the position, and since he has a habit of snoring, you may want to try spooning. 

- Do you know how long he’s waited to brush your hair behind your ear or wipe something off your face? That little action is so important to him and even he doesn’t really know why.

- Bridal carrying and piggyback rides. Ron’s a strong boy and he likes showing it off, and feeling you holding onto him.

- Getting your food stolen.

- Playing chess. 

- Dates at Hogsmeade. Sometimes the two of you just wander around and get yourselves a little privacy from every bodies prying eyes; and third wheeling.

- Going to the three broomsticks. If Ginny is there, he will immediately ask to leave and you oftentimes find it too amusing to be annoyed.

- Obviously, Ron doesn’t have a ton of pocket money so the two of you don’t do anything too expensive. A lot of your dates consist of roaming around the castle and the grounds together, finding somewhere to sit and just enjoying each other’s company.

- Sitting in the courtyard together.

- Cheering Harry on at Quidditch together and later cheering him, Ginny and Harry on with Hermione.

- Exaggerated stories. He’s always trying to impress you and make himself or what he’s done seem cooler than it really is.

- You’re constantly making jabs at each other and lovingly laughing at the other person. How can you not tease him for being in love with Viktor Krum, it’s the only way you can make yourself feel better about his obsession.

- You can practically see the hearts in his eyes when you laugh. He loves seeing and hearing it so much.

- Compliments and flattery. Is it so you’ll do his homework? Is it genuine? The world may never know.

- Making sure he actually does his work and does it well. He would be lost without you.

- You and Hermione talking about your mutual struggles with the boys. Ron and Harry watch from afar, agreeing that your little gathering makes them nervous and wondering what you’re saying.

- He likes when you try to teach him things, it gives him an excuse to be close to and watch you.

- He’s always encouraging you and reassuring you that you’ll do great and that you can do it. He’s so sure of you that you almost feel sure of yourself.

- Although he tries to not let you know just how much he is, he’s very impressed and proud of you at just about any given moment. He’s never met someone as amazing as you.

- Sometimes he surprises you with just how much he listens. Oftentimes at random, he’ll mention something that you once said and surprise you with just how much he’s taken to remembering; sometimes purely because it came out of your mouth.

- He’s always a bit speechless when you give him a gift. Once he’s over the shock, he’ll give you a “bloody hell, thank you” and a kiss on the cheek.

- Ron’s taken on Voldemort and countless other dangers and yet you’ll still have to be the one to kill the spiders in your relationship.

- Showing him muggle stuff. Oh Godric, the amount of time his father spent asking you about the muggle world when you first visited....

- Spending summers at the burrow and writing to each other; even though he teasingly pretends that he won’t.

- Ron is the youngest Weasley boy and Molly’s a momma bear so expect to be sweetly scrutinized and then made into a part of the family.

- The twins and Ginny teasing the two of you; though they do tease him more when they’re alone with him.

- You should probably apologize to Harry I’m advance because this boy never shuts up about you to him.

- Lightly touching and checking on each other’s injuries. He’s very gentle with you when you’re hurt, he treats you like you’re made of glass.

- Ron has always sort of felt like he was second best to Harry and most of his brothers so he loves when you pay special attention to him. Listening to his stories, praising him, having eyes only for him, it all makes him feel so much better about himself.

- Trying to help him smooth things over with people; especially when it comes to Harry and Hermione. It’s awkward to not be able to talk to them because your boyfriend keeps you right by his side so you try to fix things as soon as possible.

- As we all know, Ron is an incredibly jealous person and when he gets jealous, he can get a bit nasty. He’ll most likely interrupt you and make you choose between him or the guy, wanting you to prove that he’s more important to you than them by going with him. 

- Afterwards, he insults the person he’s jealous of, maybe accidentally somewhat insulting you in the process, and tries his best to make you think the other person is a git. 

- Ron is constantly jumping to defend your honor and is always ready to fight someone to do it. He may act like an ass to you at times but he really does love you and your safety is his top priority. Nothing is going to mess with his girlfriend. 

- The two of you have quite a few fights, all of them varying in intensity. Ron isn’t good at expressing his feelings so that’s usually what leads to fighting: him just not being able to communicate properly. Sometimes you have quick, hushed arguments, leaning in close to each others faces. Other times, you’ll be having loud and harsh ones filled with insinuations and insults you don’t mean. 

- You usually give each other space, whether it’s out of respect or because you both refuse to speak to the other one first depends on the situation. He asks Harry how long he thinks you’ll stay mad at him and oftentimes asks the boy to talk to you for him, mainly to see if you’re still mad. His apologies are stilted but he does give them and knowing how he is, you usually accept them. 

- There aren’t a ton of I love you’s in your relationship, given how awkward he is most of the time; particularly when you’re younger, but he will occasionally blurt it out without thinking. 

“Bloody hell,” he’ll say in awe. “Godric I love you.”

- While times certainly get tough in the future, he’s been in love with you since he was eleven and there’s no sign of it stopping any time soon. You’ll stick by each others sides and when the dust settles, you’ll start to build that life he’s been fantasizing about. 

[ask-them-bois]

I've come to make an announcement:

MUSRIO ALMAWT is a FUCKING NERD. He watches BAD, STUPID MOVIES. That's right. He drank his stupid fucking POISONS and he BINGED WATCHED fucking TWILIGHT, and he said he was SO SMART, and I said you're PRETENTIOUS. So I'm making a callout post on my Chitter.com. Musrio Almawt, you are a FUCKING NERD. You have the soundtrack to every musical downloaded on your palmhusk. And guess what? There's more! That's right, baby. MCR, Fall Out Boy, P!ATD, Hollywood Undead- look at that, you look like a fucking dork.

He's such a fucking dork, so guess what, I'm gonna give him an even dorkier partner. That's right, this is what you get! My OTAKU GAMER PUNK! Except I'm not gonna stop there. I'm gonna go higher. I'm making them a DEMONNNN! How do you like that, MUSRIO? I GAVE YOU AN EVEN BIGGER DORK TO LOVE, YOU EMOTIONALLY STUNTED IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours to come down from your POISON and FOB fueled high to cherish them, now get out of my fucking sight before I expose you even more!!!!

(inspired by @cloudbattrolls )

[limetimo]

Regulus Fics I Read This Week III

Blood of Thy Enemy - Regulus has a wife and 2 children and has been living in France teaching DADA in Beauts for the last 5 years. When he feels the Mark come alive he goes to Grimmauld to check on the destroyed Locket and runs right into Sirius. Chaos ensues and Sirius and Harry end up living with Regulus and fam in France for the holidays.

The Red String by Entwinedlove - Lily and the girls perform an accio-soulmate ritual and whoops it works! And whoops Lily's soulmate is not her fiance but her fiance's best friend's estranged little brother.

friends, first by whitherwaywill v nice slowburn Regulily ♥

Marked by wynnebat - It's short and packed like w h o a the characterization done in so little words?

Three's a crowd (but what a lovely crowd it is) by vaindumbass Lily and Regulus start dating, Regulus reaches out to Sirius to kiss and make up; oh and they meet James the really cute bartender. Very sweet!

Epoximise by NuclearNik Sad Alert! You probably won't need tissues but Regulus' life is so filled with regret. Just a prettily written tragedy

Two in one by criscros Black Brothers + Lily + mentioned James gratitious smut :D

Pain is another word for saying love by Bledyn - Lily and Regulus are in an unhealthy relationship because they're both not doing great and hurting each other feels better then the world hurting them both separately. Saddd :( and well-written.

On My Mind by Primrue Just Lily watching Regulus be pretty on a broom :D

Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough by BrianJustin4Ever Lily and Regulus date but he can never give her what James can - to go public with their relationship.

An Oligarchy Maiden by dehydrated_thot Moodboard and a short story. I'm not entirely sure what's going on here but I'm digging it. Impeccable vibes

Late by cassiopeiablack1994 it's pretty focused on Sirius and James realising they've been truly madly reciprocally in love since they were teenagers. But now they're both married (to Remus and Lily) and love their spouses too much to hurt them like that. Everyone lives, Peter wasn't a traitor, Regulus has/had a thing for Lily. I'm really curious where this goes tbh

No Love for the Wicked by VigilanteVampire4311 Harry yeets himself after Sirius into the Veil and gets yeeted to the Marauders era (the Marauders are all going to be sixth years like him). I really like racist Regulus who is too polite to actually say it. Oh and it's a different dimension and Tm Riddle is a DADA teacher and Madame Pomfrey kicks ass

To Be or Not To Be by tired_softy James and Regulus are datinggg but Regulus just got Marked (under duress) and has Emotions too big for his little emotionally stunted body. It's only 2 chapters so far but looking good!

Starting Line by EmmieAnn - Marauders uni group chat, Regulus is only going to be allowed in after Sirius fixes him up a bit

In A Years Time by tired_softy Surprise motherfucka! Regulus stole the Potters away just before Voldemort could get to them, and they're all pretended to be dead together. Poor Remus found out on the first anniversary of their "death". One chapter but it looks like the author might add more??

Silk matches by coincidences Lily is on a holiday in France when a literal cat bulglar breaks into her room and takes a nap on her lap.

let’s walk together by starryinthesky a series of Regulily dating. Cute dorks. Love them. Go check it out

Wings to follow by slyther_bi Soulmates AU where you get a tattoo of your SO's favourite animal and when you touch it becomes colourful. Because everyone's parents are happily in love, nobody is traumatised by their childhood. Everything is rainbows and sunshine. Very easygoing and sorta Severus Snape centric.

Tides by jimmyjanejams ROYALTY PIRATES AU THIS IS NOT A DRILL I REPEAT ROYALTY PIRATES AU RUNAWAY PRINCES SIRIUS AND REGULUS BOARDING A PIRATE SHIP AND FALLING FOR CAPTAIN REMUS, COOK LILY AND WHATEVER THE F JAMES' ROLE ON THE SHIP IS Wolfstar and Regulily, an AU you didn't know you needed but trust me, you do need it.

Follow In Her Paw Prints by Erica45 scared of what future holds to him if he becomes a Death Eater, Regulus runs away to live with Professor McGonagall ♥

Rest In Peace? No, Live In Peace by A2idB1u3 Alright so??? Regulus used to date James and Lily and they made him Harry's dad via adoption ritual. They broke up when Regulus became a Death Eater tho. Barty used to date Sirius but they too broke up because Death Eater. Before Regulus goes off to the cave he sends his besties a letter where he tells them about Harry being his son and asks them to look out for him. And on the October 31 1981. they do. First POV which is usually a turn off but the author makes it work really well.

Company by Primrue SAD. Regulus has a habit of wandering the halls when he can't sleep. Prefect/Head girl Lily escorts him back to his common room and eventually they start talking. But I don't think they every really understood each other. "Don't mistake my lack of brashness for apathy. And as long as we're handing out advice, try taking this one: sometimes it's better to blend in and bide your time. Not everything can be solved by announcing your moves to the world."

Face Death in the Hope by TSPofAmbition The Marauders see Regulus acquire a book on Patronuses to read up on a Patronus changing. Sirius investigates, wondering just whom his brother might love so deeply it changed his Patronus' form. PRETTY

Did you even love me? by Fall_Fairy_101 The Black Brother's relationship through the eyes of each brother. Only Regulus is up so far and it was good in the way tragedies tend to be.

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary. by Fall_Fairy_101 Sirius catches Regulus self-harming and they talk some things out.

Your dating HER? by Fall_Fairy_101 Everybody's girls. Sirius finds out her best friend is dating her little sister. Jamie is bashful and Regulus is unapologetic. Includes fan casts for the girls that made me go "Oh yeah that fits!"

Not Anymore by queerofthedagger s a d Jegulus. Regulus breaks up with James to protect him.

Like You Mean It by queerofthedagger Regulus gets hit on ina muggle bar and asks James (his crush because ofc xD) to be his boyfriend for the evening, just until the guy gets the message. Woopsie oopsie, turns out the sleazeboy is their new Quidditch teammate and Regulus and James have to keep up the act. It is entirely too easy to pretend they're in love.

When the Love Runs Out by dukeaubergine !!!!! Regulus has been under the influence of a love potion for a couple years in which time he'd done everything to make his wife Severina Black nee Snape smile. Including being a sacrifice in dark rituals or sleeping with other people for favours. When the Potters are murdered and Severina forgets Regulus in the ruins of the cottage, Sirius notices his brother is Really Not Okay and takes both him and Harry to his flat. Really scratched an itch for me :D mind the tags for non con drugging and other triggers.

Remus and Regulus: Horcrux hunters by Oliivii Remus finds out what Regulus is about to do and forces his help on the younger man. They're Horcrux hunters! It comes at the cost of their love lifes. Pregnant Narcissa joins the gang later, and we get to see Rem and Reg daddying baby Draco :D

Sugar Snow by Entwinedlove Walburga can't leave the house for five minutes because Orion does not an attentive father make. Thankfully the little boys found themselves a fun and safe, if a little messy, activity to keep them occupied!

Something Darker than Black by Starr_Burst Regulus gets yeeted from the cave to 1995. Fred and George find him at a muggle hospital and take him to Grimmauld's.

Wisdom In The Face of Danger by AshJuillet Regulus nopes out of becoming a Death Eater last minute, and drags himself to his brother's doorstep after the aftermath.

Harry's second birthday by Pluto_Princess What it says on the tin except everybody lives.

Until You're Home by AmeliaDarkholme So! Good! So good! I can't even summarise. Just. So good

Good by startohismoon confessing his crush to Regulus, James forgets to watch the Map and gets Sirius and Peter a detention. Feels and fun!

To Be Mortal by FantasticalFairyFarmer Regulus survives the cave, realises there are more Horcruxes, and begins a one man operation of finding and destroying them Love it

45 Decibels by LimeOfMagicLimo- sort of a shameless self-promotion but writing third part of the series I find myself re-reading 45Db for almost every little thing because of consistency and continuity lol