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I LOVE SEEING YOUR CAPTAIN SHIP POSTING ON MY DASH !!! Its so so cute thank you for the delicious content ❤️❤️
Me and the guy who just (accidentally…???) killed my entire troop of Pikmin 😢
#BUT YES OF COURSE!!!!!!!!!! I WILL ALWAYS SUPPLY. eventually.#yeah sorry it took me so long to reply to this#since I knew I absolutely wanted to add this drawing BUT I KEPT GETTING DISTRACTED LOLLLLL#they’re soooo cute I bet they immediately got KO’d after this photo 😁💖💖💖#everytime i see someone else draw them I go feral so I get it#I understand 😔#okay normal tag time#krillerfiller#olimar#captain olimar#nintendo#f zero#f-Zero#captain falcon#captainshipping#falimar#falcon x olimar#olimar x falcon#pikmin#olimar pikmin#pikmin olimar#super smash brothers#super smash bros#super smash bros brawl#smash bros#ssb#ssbb
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Texting habits per judging function
No one asked, but here are some observations I've made in my personal life.
*Note that this probably differs by age, gender, and culture (for instance, I have been told by several Americans that I use an insane amount of emojis, whereas it's not considered weird at all here in Germany).
FJ:
Generally very good at texting, will respond to absolutely every point you make. If you send them a long voice message, they can be found taking notes while listening so that they will not forget to answer any point you made.
Have a very hard time leaving someone on read and if they do, either something happened and they forgot, or they simply don't like you very much. If they open the message, they answer. If they don't have time to answer you right now, they simply will not open the message yet.
If the text conversation is done (i.e. you wrote something like "bye, see you tomorrow!" that does not require another response), they will still at the very least send you an emoji back for no reason other than letting you know that "Yes! I read your message! I'm not ignoring you! I love you!" (Literally every FJ I have ever known does this. Every single one, including myself.)
They will adapt to your style of texting. If you are the kind of person that likes to send a bunch of heart emojis to friends and the FJ friend is not, they will still pepper in a heart here and there. If you generally don't use emojis, they will use them only occasionally. If you reply in wallpaper long messages, so will they. If you break up your messages into several texts one after the other, so will they.
FPs:
Also generally quite good at texting and can actually appear a lot warmer in writing than in person (there have been several instances where I received really lovely messages from FPs who I used to think hated my guts whenever we met in person).
Prepare for emojis. Seriously.
You can have infinitely long text conversations with them. If you are willing to commit, the conversation between the two of you will never end. With NFPs, the conversations usually end up spiralling into nonsense scenarios, while SFPs keep telling you about their day and keep answering you about your day every day.
TPs:
(my texting experience with TPs is unfortunately very limited, so feel free to fill in my blanks)
Fe is very noticeable in the extroverts, i.e. they tend to go the FJ route described above, but in a more nonchalant and more relaxed way. Like with FJs, the focus of the conversation is on you and their dynamic with you.
The introverts (i.e. my dad, i.e. my only point of reference) are bad at texting and prefer to call, so almost all text conversations go something like this: TP: "Hi, I tried to call you, but you didn't pick up. I hope everything is alright with you?" You: "Yes, sorry. Everything's good here, how about you, everything okay?" --- end of conversation ---
TJs:
Generally bad at texting. Also don't really like it and see no point in it, so they usually prefer calling or talking in person.
Will appear colder in writing than in person, especially the STJs. Their answers will be straight to the point. No beating around the bush and no needless extension of a conversation in form of jokes/questions/anecdotes for a bonding experience. If they want to tell you something, they will tell you in person.
Have absolutely zero problem leaving people on read and usually don't mean anything by it.
STJs rarely use emojis, NTJs do but not excessively
If their answer requires them to type anything more than two sentences, they will send you a voice message instead. (Literally every single TJ I know does this, except my INTJ brother who is a complete maniac and calls instead.)
#the TJ way of texting will never stop confusing me#i usually don't look at other people's phones but i once witnessed an istj's text conversation and it's been haunting me ever since#she had just visited her husband's family with their kids and her mother-in-law sent her a really long lovely message#saying how much she enjoyed their visit and how much she loved each and every one of them and sent her a bunch of pictures#and this istj replied with 'thanks me too' and THAT WAS IT! if i had been her mother-in-law i would have assumed she doesn't like me at all#but no! this istj spent the next half hour looking at the pictures smiling softly zooming in on everyone's faces and then smiling some more#similarly one of my closest friends is an estj and she will tell you in person how much she loves you but her messages? not that warm#or my entj friend. he is a real chatterbox in person but texting? yeah no forget it#this is unimaginable for me as an FJ i would only do this as a deliberate choice to make it known that i don't want anything to do with the#so texting with a TJ always feels like recalibrating your brain to calm down and go:#'no i know they don't hate me yes i know they text like they do but i know that they don't it's okay they are like this with everyone'#and really sorry for the limited TP section. the only TPs i ever texted are my dad and some occasional acquaintances#so seriously. chime in with your observations! especially to get a broader picture from other cultures than my own as well#typing post#judging functions#cognitive functions
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Substance, Shadow, and Spirit [remixed, abridged] by Tao Yuanming
#liv in the replies#patrice bergeron#boston bruins#brad marchand#do you ever think about how brad marchand said that when bergy retired he would retire or are you capable of normal thought i'm not at all#please say a gratitude for both my sanity& y'all that this poem (which has been saved in my camera roll with the vague idea of using it for#??? long) & not one of the poems i had saved for carey for a really long time & remixed & everything with another poem until i found a poem#that absolutely murdered me in cold blood but there is an alternate universe where i did& then had to explain my unhinged thoughts to you.#anyway how are we feeling about bergy retirement. pspspspsp sara & luna are y'all doing okay like. the doc title for this one was#patrice the hockey player means a lot to me but patrice the person means so much more#which is why the end line of the other poem was so *%"@^)! (you love / what you are) because patrice does. like he is a whole ass good huma#& now since no one asked i need to tell you all the details about everything also y'all please clap i made an edit with NO baby pictures#although i did find one & save it & minimal genres of photo i always use in edits because they're my taste & aesthetic but anyway.#when i saved the first photo and marked it as one i wanted i accidentally wrote “how will he know they love him” which is not the line but#makes me feel feral about patrice & the rest of them all had hurtful names too but also. the third picture is literally a CELLY like brad#just scored a goal & he is clinging to bergy for dear life with that shit i saved that as “oh the agony on his face for unendurable”#& yes it is one of my cliches to have a draft day picture but in my defense the lifelong bond that patrice has/d with boston deserved to be#there even if i put in the love story & YES that picture is from the 2011 playoff right below it shared joy & pain & i couldn't tell you#when the brad marchy photo for together forever is except for the fact that i saw it & just the gut punch of oh my god the way he looks at#things men will praise you for is the stanley cup. duh. but i love the contrast of “some deed” being the stanley cup but then#bergy's choice to do noble deeds (ends up still earning praise &that's my note to his efforts outside of hockey we love a supportive captai#should also mention the first two i came up with & had the photos i knew i wanted for were the first and last one alskaldk but i KNEW i#wanted chara somewhere in the paragraph about leaving & then while i was looking found the one of bergy playing tuukka on accident & yes#i do have to make goalie jokes every time. no reprieve . no dice/no deal/no goal goalies have no rest/reprieve etc etc the one that killed#me though was looking for a patrice award pic & i wanted basically the one that i got for “how will you know any will praise you” & instead#also got the picture of patrice winning the some community hero award for charity work that he does & i love him mama & of COURSE that puck#is from bergy's 1000 game who do you think I am (if you guessed sleepy and emotional about patrice you'd be right) and ALSO please be ready#for all the patrice posts/bruins posts that have been sitting in my drafts to be released on this occasion of patrice retirement#I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT TUUKKA ALSO RETIRED THAT’S WHY HE WAS ON WISE OR SIMPLE NO REPRIEVE AND THAT LATE OR SOON WAS ALWAYS GOING TO BE#CHARA BECAUSE CHARA LEFT FIRST TO GO TO THE CAPS AND THEN LEFT IN RETIRMENT HE LEFT SOON BUT NOT FOR REAL THEN LATER LEFT FOR REAL (RETIRED)
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how did you find the move from choicescript to twine?? I've been working on a project in choicescript but not really sure I want to host it there anymore
hello! thank you for the ask,
preface, i think both tools are great for what they were built for. i had a good time with choicescript and it was a good introduction to what variables can be used for and structuring an if game. if you don't care about UI/ appearance, then choicescript makes sense.
i will be real and say, the move to twine was difficult personally lmao because i had no experience with html, css, or javascript prior to the move -- but that shouldn't put you off. my personal approach to it was that it's a learning opportunity.
be prepared to be 'not good'. learning something new can be a really frustrating and discouraging process. things won't work the first time round, they never do, but keep reminding yourself that this is a process and the progress, and your understanding, will come with time! the best quality a dev can have is patience, especially in the if circle.
if you go into twine thinking about your long form game/project and try to port things immediately into a template, i think it will really mess with you. make something tiny first, like a tutorial game, and when you're ready move up to the long form stuff.
you don't have to do it my way, but the best way for me to learn was to just get hands on with twine templates other developers have made. get a feel for the twine programme, language, layout, interface etc etc. i will tell you right now the second day i started learning twine/ sugarcube i got stuck on how to //open// an imported file haha. learning is hard and it sucks but now i've built my own interface for my own game!
all this being said, you don't even HAVE to build an interface for your game -- it comes with a default UI that you can start using straight away. so, if you don't care about the ui/ aesthetics, twine can still be an option.
i do want to touch on publishing, because that is a huge aspect of if. twine is a free open source tool and choicescript is not. if you get to the point where you finish a game and can publish with cog/ hosted games, then just be aware that you do not //own// your own writing because it is in the choicescript language. you will only own the IP.
i was stubborn about choicescript for a very long time, i still think it has better accessibility //because// the interface is basic and the appeal of going through a publishing house is very understandable. they have a huge reach and an established audience so there's no doubt of your game having eyes on it.
twine has an advantage being open source because no one owns it. plus, it encourages self-publishing and i think that's a great thing to aspire to as a writer! i love chop shop even more now because i built and own the whole thing. technically, twine games don't even need to be on itch.io because they're just html files, so they can be hosted anywhere that supports html. if i had a website for example i could just embed it into a page.
obviously, i am going to have a lot of bias towards twine since i made the move myself haha. i'm not trying to put my own feelings into this because COG as a company was a whole other reason why i moved and that won't be discussed on this blog.
you don't have to move to twine if you don't want to publish through COG, i'm pretty sure choicescript games can be hosted on itch.io.
edit: from @/hpowellsmith in the replies: you can have a contract with Hosted Games to monetise a ChoiceScript game on itch or elsewhere online where you pay them a smaller percentage of revenue than if you're published through Hosted Games
i think if you're happy with choicescript and COG/ hosted games then go for it and, if not, there are other options out there!! it doesn't have to be twine but it's probably one of the better tools for interactive games and has a wealth of help guides/ tutorials.
sorry this was so LONG, but thanks for reading if you got this far anyways :^)
#general ask#sorry this got long! lmao#again i'm not trying to like lakeith stanfield you and scream GET OUT but just consider your options#choicescript just ended up not being the tool for me and that's okay#and good luck with your project! plus i can always help with twine problems if needed :-)#edited: read the replies too! good good advice and insight
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from @deiscension. [ guard ] for your muse to step between my muse and danger + reverse (equivalent of a pomeranian trying to guard a doberman)
before he can do anything, a whirl of white and teal robes obscures he xuan's line of sight, buffeted around the wearer's figure by a strong wind summoned by the wave of a fan. her movements are practiced, elegant even, and she seems every bit the force of nature her domain suggests in the face of danger — though that danger wasn't a threat to the one she protects.
he has no love for his fellow undead. they're something to consume, to feed to the abyss under his sunken skin and grow his power, and they're an annoyance when they can't be that. they say he is a king, but his hollow manor, in which he has naught but bones and ash for company, tells a far different story than the bustle of ghost city. and that suits him just fine — hua cheng can fill the void in him by lording himself above the fools that live there, but he xuan knows better than to pretend he's anything more than empty.
so, when shi qingxuan dissipates the opposing ghost before it can reach out to so much as touch the perceived earth master, he xuan feels nothing. a prick of irritation, maybe, if he reaches far enough, that he didn't get the satisfaction of ridding them of the nuisance himself. or perhaps it's more that shi qingxuan bothered to step between him and the unruly ghost in the first place when he could have destroyed it with hardly a finger lifted ( not that he would have done it that way with her watching. he has a mask to keep up, and he can't display power unbefitting of an elemental master. which is often to his disdain — he hates that ridiculous shovel and it seems that inasmuch as it can feel, the feeling is mutual ).
the more he thinks about it, the more that irritation bubbles up from within the cold depths of whatever's left of his emotions. why does she always insist on this ? keeping him safe ? he's the last person to need her protection. she is the vulnerable one, always baring her wrists and her neck and all the softest parts of herself with no idea that he has teeth capable of tearing her apart. and she risks it, and for what ? for an empty old thing with plans to destroy her ? for the miserable wretch who was forced to swallow her doomed fate ?
for a best friend to whom she is oblivious — he chokes on her brilliance and she can't even see it. ( that brilliance should have been his. would he wear it as well as she does ? maybe it's the allure of it that keeps him by her side. )
" i had it, " he says darkly, a threat getting lost somewhere. " that was reckless and stupid. what would you have done if it hurt you ? "
#whenever i write a reply to u its always like. okay this one wont be that long i dont think. probably no more than a couple paragraphs#and then its more than that actually!#what can i say. hx has a lot of feelings abt sqx. sobs#deiscension#‧ coughing up feeling just for you. → 「 shi qingxuan. / deiscension. 」#‧ in. → 「 he xuan. 」
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I listened to "Curico" and "If I Lead" by Kiltro in 2022 apparently. It left enough of an impression for me to remember the band name, but not anything about the vibe.
This seems... hm... hm... like it has potential? Not this exact song (maybe), but the general sound. I'll add it to my auditions list and see if it grows on me. I suspect not, but perhaps my efforts will lead to me liking this kind of music more in the future.
#ask reply#thank you!#always open to music recs so long as the submitter is okay with me being infuriating to cater to
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not being able to reply to posts from a sideblog is actually evil. like i can kinda understand not being able to like from a sideblog because it's one tap/click etc etc whatever. but not being able to REPLY???? cruel
#and even if you just make another whole account just so you can like/reply you cant easily switch between them esp as an solely mobile user!#like ive been on tumblr for somewhere around 10 years and ive seen some bizarre decisions made. anyone else remember fanmail#but this has ALWAYS GRINDED MY GEARS#reblogging a Whole Post with additions gets so long and i dont want to put the same fuckign post on yalls dash 20 times yk#okay rant over#anontalks#finally got time to draw. too tired to draw. woe
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One thing to know about you: What’s your favorite video game? :)
hey okay ahhh. it took me a bit to get back to this cause i genuinely had to think about it- jst because while yeah i DO play a lot of games, i have a habit of not finishing them??? its a whole thing BUT.
its down between two for me- and yeah its hunter-core of me to say this, but BUT BUT- TLoZ twilight princess really really has stuck with me.
as it being my first zelda game/introduction to the series i got it used on whim and literally have over 100 hours in a save file (look- you CAN clear it in shorter time but i just was really into it-) and its a game ive actually replayed two or three times in full??? its just such a good zelda game (people will talk shit about the wii version but gamecube prices/the hd port to wii u istg- i WILL settle for motion controls- actually they didnt bother me too???). i just like the entire gritty feeling of the world and how realistic it looks. its mature while also the standard linear progression to pre botw zelda. botw is good- but its one of those games i said earlier about not finishing haha. twilight princess is just THAT. like it hooked me. same with the entire soundtrack and just- mannnn i cant even explain it! skyward sword is good too- but i just hold tp closer from the zelda games ive played (which arent many but i really think theyre cool as someone who only had a knowledge of solely nintendo=mari> for years, branching out on their other ips was a cool experience).
and the other one would be the 2018 insomniac spider-man game. when i played it FAR after its release (like in 2022 lmao) i just couldnt put it down. like everything from the combat to how fluid the web-slinging feels- it all just flowed so naturally to where it engrossed me as a whole. i fully wasted an entire weekend to beat the entire mf game. THATS how into it i was 💀😭.
oh and the ending of the story literally made me almost cry. AUGH. im not gonna spoil it but damn </3. i really would like to get a ps5 eventually to play though the sequel. miles morals eventually too- ik that ones pretty short so it shouldnt be that long. uhhh- im not even like a superhero person either- like im not diehard into the marvel universe but i just really heard such things about it over the years and it delivered for me.
i could probably say honorable mentions with neo: the world ends with you or doom 3. its a whole thing. i mainly play anime games (not alllllll the time but a lot of my ps4 library consists of anime games.)
I KNOW im rambling but in conclusion, twilight princess and 2018 spider-man (NOT the remaster on ps5. the og ps4 version. its just better. trust me.)
#thanks for the ask!!#sorry this is a bit too long but im just like aaaaaa#whenever i get to talk abt games its fun and i know some of this DOESNT make sense but thats okay :)#i mean like gamecube prices and tp's wii u port are REALLY expensive here on ebay compared to the wii version#anyway yeah!! cool. cool.#i will always talk abt games if asked dw like i am so up retro gaming's ass that i will be like “omg did u know [insert some stupid shit]”#its one of my special interests#billys replying to asks
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I want you to know that I write about OAO in my diary. I dont have any friends who read it but I always have Thoughts and Feelings and leaving a comment is simply not enough.
anon!!!! you write about it in your diary !!!!!!!!!! help this is so cute. if you ever wanna expel some of those thoughts n feelings elsewhere bab, you're so welcome to expel them here! i simply adore talking about them <3
#oao#okay so. the next chapter (after the one i'm currently editing) is the long awaited remus pov#and i'm not at all prepared for the levels of psychic and emotional damage it will deal :-\#(most of the damage is dealt in the half of the chapter that;s set in the past. but this guy. THIS GUY............)#also i know i'm sooo horribly slow at replying to comments </3#whenever i try i just always end up sitting there blushing and giggling and smiling. i feel sooo touched! and i don't know what to say!
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hello?🧍🏻♀️
#I'll write in the tags because uhhh-#idk#sorry for being gone for so long#I MISSED TUMBLR😭😭😭😭😭#I'll reply to msgs/asks/everything in a while#thanks for staying around#and to everyone new?? idk why you're here but heyyyy hello#the last time i left was for some very random reason idk but those sem exams weren't so difficult that I had to get off tumblr???#I would've returned last year around Jan but then I had to move out and everything was overwhelming and and and#I'll try not leaving again because it's so difficult to return once you see it isn't necessary???#(I'm not using the right words but I hope it makes sense somehow)#ALSO if you've dropped by at some point then there's a good chance that it was noticed#thank you for checking up on me <333#it didn't always feel like that but I was okayyyy#just too lost#lol#and btwww missing tumblr meant I would come back sometimes and stalk people/posts so my already-filled drafts are more filled now haha#all the notifications I'm going to drop will be annoying#bear with me :3#AND OKAY what's with tumblr and its updates?#@staff are OKAY??#what's this mess T-T#+ issokayyy if you didn't notice i was gone. HAPPENS <3#(assuming you care) it's so much easier to not know you have to miss someone until they are back and you no longer have to do it
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advices are welcome because i ✨dont know anything anymore✨
#this friend of mine is the sweetest#we always got along even though we're very different#in the way that im a very closed off person i dont like social media and i will not reply to texts and its nothing personal its just me#he on the other hand is very talkative. loves showing affection and has like 3 different podcasts and he's friends with literally everyone#long story short he graduated and moved cities it's been 3 months#also i went through a very bad depressive episode and im still crawling out of it#he says im distant and its not because the lack of texts but because there isnt a way to communicate with me#i say im depressed and its disappearing is nothing new and he knows this. that all im asking is time#he says he's anxious and has abandonment issues and that his love language is words of affirmation#i say i was never a person that says much from the beginning and listed all other things ive done and sacrifice myself for him#he says he understands and he feels loved and cared for by me. still his love language is words of affirmation and he needs it#it feels like a demand even though he keeps saying it's not#he says there's nothing wrong with me being an overall absent person and that the problem is with him#his insecurities and words of affirmation is the way out of it#and i dont know what to do anymore#i want someone to tell me im in the wrong and that friends give in for each other#but everyone keeps saying this is not okay and i dont know i understand where he's coming from#i just .... im so tired#'ik you said you dont have energy but do you see where im coming from?' left a bad taste in my mouth#idk my heart is heavy im so exhausted and i wish he had read that damn text i sent him carefully and not rushed to replu#reply*#how can a person respect your boundaries and still cross them and then no it's actually you misunderstanding?#aita#personal
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When you get this, list 3 facts about your favorite sim and send it to the last 3 people in your notifications! Let's get to know each others' sims!
three little facts about theo... okay <3
theo technically has two names! there's theodore and then there's yeonu. yeonu is only what he goes by w/ his extended family.
theo was never allowed to have a pet as a child... most of his adolescence was spent entirely alone. he really likes odious (matthias's cat) but playing with her makes him feel a little sad... he can't help but think that he wouldn't have been such a lonely child if he had a companion.
theo really likes playing sports. he's the best at soccer and the worst at tennis (are these the only two sports i know anything about? ...perhaps). he doesn't actually watch sports, though. he's only interested in actually playing and feeling all that energy and movement. he's also very competitive athletically. he'll play dirty.
#river dipping#asks#simarcana#echthroi#theodore doe#oc extras#sorry this took me so long to reply to......................#y'kno how it is i think it's impossible to take any less that five hours minimum to reply to a single ask abt ocs......#nvm that this took a day...........#also this really didn't need a photo of theo attached to it like. everyone here knows who theo is.............. STILL......#he's my little guy <3 so i think everyone should see him#his krn name is standardly written as yeonwoo... but i prefer yeonu bc that's how the name is actually pronounced#romanization my number one enemy always and forever#but okay i'm zooming to other ppl's asks w/ this message#thank youuuuuuu arcana <333#ALSO I SEE YOUR OTHER ASK ABT HIS DAD'S ACCIDENT!!! I'LL ANSWER IT EVENTUALLY I PROMISEEE MWAH
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going to a party and length entirely depends on this guy i was cool with but now annoys the fuck out of me
#personal#last time we hung out together he would not let me even get an inch of space whole fucking party#i couldn’t talk to anyone couldn’t sit down could walk around without him barely a step away and fucking leaning on me and like okay you#haven’t seen me for a while so has everyone at this party bc it’s was my first outing since the whole situation dude let me say hi to other#people#like could not talk to anyone else bc he was always just there!!!!!!#and i’m gonna be so honest#i cannot bring myself to care like#he’s being stand offish now after inviting me to the party#bc i was like oh hey don’t know if i can stop firestar or for how long bc i work today and tomorrow etc#and now he’s giving one word replies and it’s like dude what do you want me from me#we were work friends i got a different job my dad died and the last time we hung you either ask my best friend to make out#or hang off of me all night to the point i RAN out while you were pissing#like not even oh we flirted or oh situationship or whatever we were literally just work friends i don’t know where he’s banking all of this#shit but anyway if he’s clingy or weird or just gives me any shit baby i’m going home#but also excited it’s pink themed so hannibal eat me shirt >:) and also old coworkers AND people from my weed shop#when worlds collide#anyway wonder if it’s one of the workers who flirt with me wednmdmdnfjdnbcncjenfndnfnfnf g fjfnnfnfne#anyway if that one guy asks why i’m like so stand off ish or busy or whatever i’m gonna be honest ish and be dude i have a full time job and#my dad died 3 months ago. i got my own shit to deal with and i can barely care about anyone else’s stuff#like obviously i care wirh mh family and like. 3 best friends but everyone else im like if u catch me at a good time no worries but#i’m not gonna go out of my way for a lot of things emotionally or literally
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Omg you're an Ed fan! Did you ever watch that movie father figures he did with Owen, its really good
Hey there anon, an absolute yes to both and a fav comfort watch!! 😁
It's actually one of the exactly two Owen movies I'd ever seen before the Loki series sent life on a whole new trajectory, lol. Went opening weekend because while I've loved Ed forever a lot of his movies don't even screen locally so I specifically remember driving to the movie theater furthest from my house in December when it was an icy negative 2 degrees out (do not recommend 😅) and very ironically walked away captivated with how Owen's character wasn't at all like the stereotypical slacker brother who ruins everything?? Which I've now found out was all due to his usual improv/adjustment of each character he plays because ofc it was, haha. Super refreshing and their relationship was instantly natural plus as someone completely biased here their contrast in personality and style is unbelievably hot 👀
#okay yes it does have that one very unnecessary scene that anyone who's watched will know but idc lol it's still an ultimate fav#tbh it had been a rough year w/ my dad's health so all i remembered about the movie was them both looking fine af and owen being a surprise#if i'd been more myself at the time i very possibly might have started stanning then because he was on my mind for a long while after that#and oh gosh that was such a long reply to basically say 'yes' apologies for always babbling on in these 😩#thank you so much for the ask and hope you're having a great day <33#ask
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How do you approach arguments with siblings?
that's such a hard question to answer bc it really depends on your relationship with your siblings and your individual personalities. there is not best or standard appraoch that will work for everyone. i have a good, and pretty close relationship with both my younger brothers, and as an older sister i was very much someone who occasionally scolded them when we were kids. so directly approaching them with any criticism or issue i am having comes pretty natural at this point. personally, i'd just be quite frank about whatever it is that's bothering me or that i want to discuss and confront them in a pretty straightforward way. i also try to make sure they're aware of my feelings (e.g. i try to be honest about feeling hurt or disappointed or concerned—i try to show vulnerability and be transparent. doesn't work all the time. it's a very hard thing to do). but that only works because we trust each other and they know me and my manner of dealing with things (and i know them). they're also (i hope) aware that, no matter what, i love and adore them as people. we're all in our 20s now so, you know, it's very rare that we even fight these days, so they know i mean business when i have something to complain about. the way i deal with my brothers is in no way how everyone deals or can deal or should deal with their siblings. there might be people you cannot even engage in an argument for whatever reasons. or people who will dismiss your feelings and the points you're making and turn the entire situation on you. and there's, sadly, not much you can do about that. if someone doesn't want to listen, it's hard to make them understand. and ofc sometimes it can even be dangerous for you to broach a subject with someone. if it's all more an issue of misunderstandings, it's important to figure out where exactly communications goes awry. i found that repeating back to people what i think they are trying to say OR imply (or vice versa) can clear up things sometimes. doesn't always work either though. i also learned that i ususally fare better when i layout an argument in my head and prepare some sentences before i start a difficult conversation. i often still forget some things in the heat of the moment, but just having thought about the most important points in advance makes that less likely (in my experience).
like i said, it's all so, so very dependent on many factors. if you have any more questions i am happy to help out as best as i can <;3
#i have a feeling this isn't very helpful i am so sorry.#idk if you saw the anon i published a couple of hours ago but i have been quite busy so that's why this reply took so long#hope you're doing okay and that you get to resolve whatever issues you're having with your sibling(s)#arguments are always a little scary and so so hard to bring up.#it takes so much bravery to talk honestly with people. and sometimes you need to give yourself time to get to a point where you can#like tbh i chicken out of a lot of difficult conversations regularly. it sometimes takes me weeks to work up to them.#sometimes you need a couple of tries before can do it. and that's okay. so take your time if you can.#answer#anon
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The last time we were on a long flight, my wife and I invented a game we call "Little Guy."
You start a game of Little Guy by saying, "I'm gonna hand you a little guy." The little guy is some kind of baby animal you are imagining. "Oh," she might say in response, "Okay," and hold out her hands for it. I will then mime handing her the animal. This provides some clues as to the little guy's size, weight, and general ungainliness.
She then gets to ask questions about what kind of little guy this is, BUT NO QUESTIONS ABOUT HIS ACTUAL APPEARANCE OR SPECIES ARE ALLOWED. Qualitative questions, or questions about his behavior, are the only ones permitted. She can ask "Is he soft?" or "Does he seem nervous about being held?" or "If I put him in the bathtub, does he seem okay with that?" or "Would he like a lil grape?" or "Is he the sort of little fellow who would wear a vest in a children's book?" but not "Does he have fur," "Is he a reptile," "Is he from Asia," etc. Some questions are in a grey area so you have to follow your heart, but the point is not to identify the animal as fast as possible: the point is to guess the animal purely based on vibes + how he would act if he were in your living room right now.
And I'm not limited to yes or no answers! If she asks, "Would it feel appropriate to see this little guy in a propeller hat?" I can reply, "Oh no, he has a gravity to him. A bowler hat would be a more appropriate hat." Or if she asks, "Does this little guy have protagonist energy?" I can say something like, "he probably wouldn't be the main character in a children's cartoon. He'd probably be the main character's ditzy best friend who's always eating sandwiches, or something."
We're big Twenty Questions to kill time in a waiting room people, but Little Guy is more about the journey than the destination. It's got a different kind of sauce that's nice if "killing time" and "lowering anxiety" need to happen hand in hand.
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