#long post btw just so you are warned

[p1ctur3]

@octdl-lee

Random captive TDL au lore dump and some behind the scenes stuff since you asked so nicely :]

Dark in captivity

victim did use dark as a way to train and get the mercs and him used to the box

victim and agent (i would probably explore their dynamic in this au also, mitsi would haunt this narrative because yes)

some behind the scenes things

additional art

[wildstar25]

Since im now reminded of the au I did almost finish writing this big thing for it but its not done, im not going back to it, and its not proof read. here.

In a world where the G tribe could not secure passage to Sharlaya for G'raha before the Imperial Army came knocking at their door for conscripts; and where Arsay's parents take her on their adventures through Orthard, only to find themselves in Doma just as Garlemald invades. Both get taken to be raised in the barracks. After all, what better way is there to reduce the chance of a revolt, than to mold the impressionable minds of the newly conquered in favor of the Empire?

They are the best of friends, G'raha and Arsay. Two peas in a pod. G’raha dreamed of becoming a Legatus. He wanted to be the respected commander who saved the day and was recognized for his tactics and bravery. Arsay shared his dream, she would happily be his right hand man. The first one G’raha would call for, the person he could always rely on. Until one day where G'raha is re-assigned to a base in Mor Dhona; a desperate attempt to maintain a foothold in the area after the destruction of the praetorium. He promised to keep in as much contact with Arsay as he can. She held him to that promise.

As he got closer to Syrcus Tower, G'raha's mind was flooded with knowledge and memories of eras long past. A strange force pulled him towards the looming spire in the distance. He recalled something his father once told him before Garlean forces raided their home. Something about his eye and his bloodline. G'raha Tia left camp in the dead of night, his curiosity guiding him.

It is wandering near Revenant's Toll that G'raha found himself in the company of the Scions of the seventh dawn. The terrible liar that he was, there was little point in hiding his identity or intentions. Luckily, they were sympathetic to his plight and escorted him to the study camp. He involved himself in the investigation, got inspired by the one they call "the champion of Eorzea", and was about to choose to seal himself in the tower as a way for atoning for all the harm he had done as an imperial soldier. The thought of breaking his promise to a dear childhood friend, however, stopped him. He couldn't very well write to her, as he was now a defected agent; but he also couldn't live with himself knowing she was missing out on such a wondrous life outside of the empire. That everything they've been taught to think has been baseless propaganda.

He instead petitioned the hero for an entry into the Scions of the Seventh Dawn. They accepted him with open arms. Never having trained in magic, G'raha obtained a fragment of crystal from the tower. With Allagan royal blood now awakened in him, the shard would act as a conduit to channel powers he once shunned. During the events of the bloody banquet, the WoL did not make it out of the tunnel. They sacrificed themselves to push G'raha out of the way of some falling debris. Thus, G'raha Tia takes on the responsibility of the WoL, even going so far as to manifest the echo. He learned what it is to be a Dark Knight in Ishgard. He put an end to the Dragonsong War, defeated the Griffin, lost another friend and mentor, and resolved himself to aid in the liberation of Ala Mihgo.

On the border between the Black Shroud and The Fringes, the two reunited at long last. It does not go nearly as well as G'raha imagined it would.

Arsay greeted him with an ambush; calling him a traitor from the tree tops before she lunged at him with her katana. G'raha grabbed a hold of his blade just in time to stop the blow. When he realized who it was in front of him, G'raha lit up with naïve excitement. "I can't believe it," he exclaimed, "Arsay! Arsay, it's really you!" Arsay snarled at him before she launched herself backwards with a flip, "Oh, so now you remember me? How convenient!" With a growl, she sprinted towards G'raha once more and swung at him furiously. G'raha desperately blocked each attack as he begged her to stop, but Arsay would not listen.

---

It was a month after G'raha's departure to Eorzea. Arsay had gotten fed up with the lack of communication and reached out to the unit he'd been transferred to. The news that her only friend, the person she planned her life with, was a deserter crushed her. She couldn't help but feel utterly betrayed. The one person she felt like she could trust had made a fool of her. He abandoned her the first moment he could; was he ever even really her friend to begin with?

News of a red-haired Miqo'te defeating The Legatus of the VIth Imperial Legion spread and eventually found its way to Arsay's ears. She was consumed by rage. It was one thing to up and disappear; it was something else entirely for G'raha to have made himself an enemy of Garlemald. To shove it in her face that he left and made himself a new life, all without her. She made it her mission to one day track him down and make him pay for this hurt he had inflicted on her. In order to gain such freedom, she would need to be more than a foot soldier. Thus Arsay worked twice as hard, became ruthless on the field and in training. Whispers of her vindictive behaviour spread through the chain of command. Her blood lust peaked the interest of a certain Legatus, "It would seem we are after the same prey... A contest, then, of who is the better hunter." With a simple nod of her head, Arsay was granted the power she dreamed of. The next day she made for Baelsar's wall.

---

No matter what words G'raha said, Arsay continued to slash. Sparks flew as metal clashed against metal. A moment of hesitation from G'raha gave Arsay the opening she needed. She drew her blade back in one smooth motion in preparation. Her ears twitched. Arsay leaned back to narrowly avoid the fist flying at her. Arsay clicked her teeth and flipped backwards. Lyse clumsily adjusted herself to regain her footing beside G'raha. The other Scions too ran to gather around him. Each drew their arms and readied their spells.

"So these are my replacements," Arsay hissed, "what a pathetic lot." She lifted her arm to point her blade at G'raha. "To think you've become so cowardly, Raha. Hiding behind your new 'friends' won't help you. I've fought larger foes without breaking a sweat." 

" 'Raha'?" Lyse frowned, "G'raha, do you know her?" G'raha nodded. The seeker opened his mouth to reply before Arsay cut him off,

"HA! I should have guessed; never even bothered to mention me once, did you? Of course not. Why would you? I obviously wasn't important to you."

Despite the smirk on her face, Arsay's anger was clearly visible through the ferocity in which her tail whipped back and forth. She took a moment to scan the group. For a moment G'raha swore he saw sadness behind her piercing red glare. He thought perhaps this was his chance to break through to her.

"Arsay, you don't understand. I-" "Oh, I understand everything, Raha. You saw the chance to escape and took it. Got yourself a new life; a new eye too. You're even taking the chance to relive your childhood. I heard you're having lots of fun playing 'Hero', hah. … Y'know, I suppose I should be a little flattered by just how many toys you had to find to replace me." With that, Arsay sheathed her sword and leapt into the air, landing on a nearby branch. She called down to her former friend, her voice echoing through the forest.

"Enjoy your little fantasy while you can, Raha. Soon enough it'll end with my blade at your throat."

She jumped upwards once more to grab hold of a magitek drone above the treetops. The machine whirred as it flew Arsay towards Castellum Velodyna. G'raha yelled out to her as loud as he could, desperate to chase after her. The scions held him back, demanding an explanation. "She's my friend," he told them. "At least, she used to be..."

The scions continued their journey into Gyr Abania. G'raha learned Arsay isn't the only Garlean hunting him down. Their party split after tragedy struck Rhalger's Reach; the remaining and un-injured scions head east by sea in search of aid. At the ruby sea, G'raha bore witness to Arsay aiding in Yostuyu's rain of terror on the fishing village. He took notice of how she hesitated oh so slightly before carrying out the brutality requested of the acting viceroy. When the scions interfered in the display, Arsay took no time at all for her to trade blows with G'raha. He tells her she's gone too far, she retorts that he's just grown too soft. She and Yostuyu flee when they find themselves out matched by the confederacy's arrival.

After G'raha won the title of Khagan, Arsay appeared again. This time with a sloth of magitek weapons, enough to keep all of "Raha's friends" occupied. The two fought once more, both bosting new skills and tactics. G'raha attempted to appeal to the Arsay he knew all those years ago. To prove to her he never forgot their time together. Unable to see past her resentment, Arsay refused to acknowledge his words. A yard away, Sadu blew up some Magitek Armor which sent heaps of metal cascading through the air. Noticing from the corner of his eye, G'raha dove at Arsay to shield her from an oncoming shard of flaming debris. They both crashed to the ground, Arsay pinned under G'raha in a daze. The two stared at each other wordlessly as the fight around them continued. Just as Arsay was about to move, G'raha wrapped his arms around her in a hug.

"Please, Arsay, you can stop all this! We can go back to how things were, we can be friends again! I miss our time together more than anything else!" G'raha buried his face into the crook of her neck. Arsay's eyes widened. Slowly, she made movements to hug him back. "So... you'd come back with me?" A cautious optimism carried through her tone. Her hands rested gently on G'raha's arm. The way his muscles tensed at the mere suggestion told her everything. "I... Arsay, I can't, but- Ahg!!" Arsay dug her nails into his bare skin and dragged them down his arm in one swift movement. G'raha recoiled at the scratch which gave Arsay enough room to move. She delivered a forceful kick to his chest which knocked him back. Arsay scrambled to her feet as G'raha feebly attempted to catch his breath. "You will not fool me again. I won’t let you" She snarled. 

The tide of the battle had changed; the many clans of the step rained victorious against the mechanical weapons of Garlemald, and G’raha’s friends were quick to rush to his aid. Arsay lingered, looking on as Hien helped G’raha to his feet. There was a longing in her expression. G’raha clutched his side with one hand and reached out to Arsay with the other. Any attempt to call out to her came out as labored wheezing. Arsay walked backwards a few paces before she turned tail and ran as fast as she could. When G’raha finally caught his breath, all that remained of her was her katana, abandoned in the grass of the Azim Steppe. 

Hien was brought back to the people of Doma. His presence alone was enough to ignite enthusiasm throughout the House of Fierce. G’raha wished he could share an ounce of their excitement. Instead, he sat at an empty table, gloom hung over him like a cloud. In his hand was Arsay’s forgotten weapon. G’raha took notice of how pristine of a condition it was in; the blade had been recently sharpened, the metal polished to a perfect shine, and the cord wrapping had not a single stain. Were it not for the familiar scratches on the hand guard, we would almost believe it to be brand new. G’raha still remembered the day Arsay received the sword. They had finally graduated from training onto a real unit and were outfitted with their gear. Arsay had been given a sword that was comically large for her stature. Dumbfounded, Arsay requested a more suitable weapon. The Decanus did not appreciate the lip, calling her request “ridiculous” and “typical laziness suited to a non-garlean”. Their unit was punished for her “outburst” by way of forfeiting their meal privileges for the day. Arsay hung her head low, doing her best to avoid the seering gazes of her fellow soldiers. It was later on that G’raha approached her for a trade. The katana he had was issued for Arsay’s odachi. Arsay protested at first, the odachi was a bit too big for G’raha as well. G’raha assured her he’d grow into it eventually. He also insisted It was more important that they look after each other, since they were all the other person had. 

All the fondness he felt for that memory was now replaced with guilt. He couldn’t help but wonder if he was responsible for how things turned out. It was obvious they still cared for each other; the way Arsay treasured this sword G’raha gave her was proof enough. What he couldn’t understand is why she still clung to the Empire. If only he could show her how much better it was on the other side. Countless potential arguments ran through his head. Surely he’d come up with something that could convince her. His thoughts were cut short, as it didn’t take long for Alphinaud to approach him with a task. G’raha did his best to hide the turmoil in his heart and accepted the job with a smile. He was going to make things right between himself and Arsay, but the goal of liberating Doma could not become an afterthought. 

After all the preparations had been made, the time for action was upon them. The siege on Doma Castle was a difficult endeavor to say the least. Countless magitek automatons and Garlean forces barred their path, but G’raha, along with Hien, Gosetsu, and Yugiri, broke through every obstacle. They ran down the scarlet halls as fast as they could, all acutely aware of the impending collapse of the foundation. The midday sun shone through from the eastern windows, the gilded accents and marble floors shone brilliantly. It was no wonder why Hien’s plan to flood the Castle had shocked so many; this place was a marvel to behold. As the kingdom's prince said in his rallying address, however, Doma was a people above all. They would not beholden to any one building, no matter how great. Unable to sleep the evening prior, G’raha reflected on that sentiment for a time. He wondered if his friendship with Arsay could be  like that. If it too could live beyond its ties to the past. If G’raha could wash away the years of pain and anger, could he and Arsay build something new - something better- together? He would soon find out the answer to his question. 

The team stopped in their tracks at the Halls of The Scarlet Swallow as a figure cast in shadow approached them from down the hall. The scrapping of a blade’s edge against the floor pierced G’raha’s ears. 

“Hey Raha.” 

A cold voice echoed throughout the caverness room. G’raha narrowed his eyes. 

“Arsay.” 

He had hoped she wouldn’t be here, of all places. Arsay emerged from the shadows wielding a silver gunblade unlike he’d ever seen before. This would not be good. G’raha turned back to Hien and the others. All it took was a nod for them to understand how to proceed. The three rushed forward. As expected, Arsay let the Domans past her without so much of a bat of the eye. With a burst of aether, Arsay launched into the air and aimed herself  towards her true target, G’raha, his sword at the ready. Sparks flew as metal clashed against metal. G’raha grit his teeth, using all his might to stop his legs from buckling under the force of her attack. He knew Arsay to be strong, but not this strong. He noticed her finger squeeze back the trigger of the gun mechanism, the cartridges spun with a faint blue glow. Reflexively, G’raha shifted his weight to change the angle of his great sword. BANG! A bright flash of heat flew past G’raha’s head leaving the tips of his hair singed. He felt the hot hair on the back of his neck as the shot hit the wall behind him with a loud boom. G’raha looked over to see a huge mark in the wall, about the size of a moogle. The stunning red paint around the impact zone was now covered in black soot. Had she honestly tried to kill him just now? He turned to look at Arsay, who had been sent back from the force of her own blast, in shock. The hateful glare on her face twisted into a grin. 

“What’s the matter, Raha? I thought you’d be used to seeing aether manipulation by now.” She taunted. G’raha’s suspicions had been confirmed, that the bullet was more than just Ceruleum and blast powder. Arsay swung the gunblade around with a chuckle. “Pretty cool, right? It’s okay to be jealous, not every day you get to see the newest magitek hot off the workbench. Leagues better than that dingy old katana. Honestly, I should have ditched that thing years ago.” 

“We both know you don’t mean that.” G’raha frowned, cutting right through Arsay’s posturing. He saw her tail twitch in annoyance. She adjusted her grip on the blade and fired off another shot mid swing. The charge flew clear over G’raha’s shoulder into a decorative pillar. His ears folded back instinctively at the loud impact. Arsay curled her upper lip in a growl. 

“No, you don’t. You know nothing about me!” She pressed down on the balls of her feet and rushed towards G’raha. The Keeper swung her blade but G’raha pivoted in time to dodge. Arsay twisted to face her gun’s barrel at the Seeker, finger already squeezing the trigger. G’raha recognized the delay between her pressing the trigger and the shot firing - time needed for the prototype’s mechanism to activate, he hypothesized- and used that moment to knock her blade upwards with his own. Dust from the ceiling danced in the air, making its way down. At the same instance, the ground beneath their feet shook. G’raha furrowed his brow; he had to put an end to this, and soon. Arsay paid no mind to the rumbling, unaware of the revolutionary’s plans, she attributed it to her attack. She pulled back her arm to ready another swing. Meanwhile G’raha spun himself around, the tip of his sword aimed low in an attempt to catch Arsay’s feet. If he could incapacitate her, just for a moment, that would be enough to drag her out of here. The sound of G’raha’s sword etching the tile gave his attack away. Arsay jumped just in time to avoid the cutting edge and landed on the flat side of the blade. She used the surface like a spring board, and flung herself into the air. Caught off guard by the extra weight and force, G’raha lost his footing. He stumbled, almost tripping to the ground as Arsay spun over him. She shot her gun once more. The blast hit right in front of G’raha. The flash completely dazed him; all he saw was white, all he could hear was a high pitched ring. He felt a force coming towards him, but had no sense of direction. The blunt side of the prototype gunblade connected with G’raha’s side. He did his best to absorb the hit and regain composure. G’raha straightens himself out, keeping his head up though the world still spun around him. BAM! Another shot goes off. Then, just as suddenly, Arsay’s feet hit him square in the chest. She had used the recoil to strengthen the power of her kick. It was enough to send G’raha down to the ground with a thud. He gasped, breathless from the fall. A weight on his chest prevented him from taking a full lung of air.

His vision began to clear; on top him was Arsay, her knees on either side of his torso which kept him locked in place. She stared at him with cold eyes, waiting for him to regain his senses. She raised her arm, her gunblade pointed heavensward. The weapon which she had been wielding so effortlessly now looked heavy in her hand. Her finger pulled down on the trigger, the mechanism whirred. The glow it had emitted before was barely visible. G’raha winced at the flash, a second later the contents of the ceiling rained down on them. Flecks of gold paint sparkled as they were caught by the sunlight.From G’raha’s perspective, it appeared as if Arsay was floating above him surrounded by stars. As he cursed himself for even daring to think of such poetic imagery at a time like this, the ground once more shook. 

“Arsay…” G’raha coughed out. He had to warn her before it was too late. The feeling of a sharp edge digging into his neck stopped him. 

“I told you your game of “Hero” would end with my blade.” Arsay hissed out. Her chest heaved with every breath she took. She looked exhausted, much more tired than she should be. G’raha wracked his brain for an explanation. His mind went straight for the gunblade, how every shot seemed less and less potent. Was it possible they designed it to consume unsustainable amounts of aether? That would be absurd! It would take only a few shots each for the empire’s frontlines to find themselves completely depleted of energy and at the mercy of their opponents weapons. Though he supposed, if those few shots were able to wipe out full units of alliance soldiers, and their frontlines were composed of a majority of those without pure garlean heritage…. G’raha clicked his teeth. They would be that cruel, he concluded.

“Arsay,” G’raha locked eyes with her, “whatever the Empire has promised you, It’s not worth your life. You have to see that! Their ideals are faulty, their method of creating peace hypocritical. No matter how much you do, how many ranks you move up, you’ll never be more than a tool to them! I do know you, Arsay. I know you have a big heart. So, please, before we run out of time, find that part inside of you that wants to put an end to all the pain and suffering Garlean rule has inflicted on this land!” 

G’raha hoped with all his heart that he would finally get through to her. His eyes darted back and forth, trying to catch any change in expression. Arsay sat silently, she closed her eyes and her ears turned back. Her tail swatted from side to side as her lips cracked into a smile. A small chuckle escaped her nose before she tilted her head back into a full cackle. G’raha watched, completely vexed by her reaction.The laughing stopped. Like a marionette whose stringers were cut, Arsay’s head dropped forward. Shadows casted over her face, occluding every detail. Something fell from her face, catching the light with a glint. G’raha’s breath caught as he felt the sting of cold steel sink into his skin, drawing blood. 

“... You think I give a damn about the stupid Empire!? That I would care enough to throw my life away for them!?” Arsay’s neck snapped up as she snarled at him. Tears filled her eyes and overflowed over her cheeks. “The only thing I ever wanted to be important to someone, anyone! I thought I was important to you… you were the only one who ever treated me with respect, who made me feel like I could be something more; but, it was all an act! You didn’t care! It didn’t even take a week for you to forget about me… you didn’t even try to send word to me!” With her free hand, she pounded her fist into the ground beside G’raha head. “I would have left for you, y’know- If you had asked- but you didn’t want me; you had already replaced me like I was nothing! Because that’s all I ever was to you: A nobody. A character from one of your fairytale books. The one who’s just there to make the hero feel special, designed to be forgotten the moment you turn the page. Abandoned by the narrative.” Arsay’s posture dropped, crumbling under the weight of her own misery. “A tool for the Empire or a plaything to a boy acting out fantasies… What's the difference? At least this way I die making sure your story has a terrible ending.”  

G’raha didn’t know what hurt more, the bitterness in Arsay’s voice or the way the gunblade shook against his flesh. He swallowed. “If you really wanted to kill me, you would have done it already.” Slowly he moved his hand and grabbed the sharp side of the blade. The leather of his gloves protected his palm as tried to push it away.

“Shut up!” Arsay pushed back. Beads of blood  began to pool from G’raha’s neck onto the steel’s surface. The sound of gunfire echoed in the distance. Followed by the cracking of rock, the splintering of wood. The castle began to crumble around them as the two remained in their stalemate on the ground.

“It’s true; you can’t bring yourself to do it. Deep down you know that’s not what you want. You know that everything you’ve been telling yourself isn’t real.” G’raha glanced up at the ceiling, the smallest cracks began to show in the corners.. Gritting his teeth, he pushed on the blade again. He could feel it  pushing through his glove. “ I won’t deny what I did to you was terrible. For that I apologize from the bottom of my heart. I am sorry, Arsay, well and truly sorry. I owe you a proper explanation for my actions, but we’ve not the time. Please, understand that It was never my intention to hurt you.” G’raha looked back at Arsay, tears stained her face and her eyes were red and weary. “I have always admired you, Arsay. Your tenacity, your strength, the way you will always say what’s on your mind regardless of who you are talking to, how you will do all within your power to achieve your goals. I dove head first into battle countless times knowing you would have done the same. Even though we were worlds apart, I would feel your presence in those moments and it would grant me immeasurable power. Never once had I given up on hoping I would one day see you again. I dreamed of the day I could take your hand and show you a  life outside of the Empire. I wanted to introduce you to my friends- for them to be your friends too! I wanted us to have a future together, just as we promised. One where we would ever be side by side doing everything imaginable to make the world a better place- though more cooperative means than that of the Garleans. A life that is more than fighting for our right to be seen as an equal. I want you to feel the freedom I’ve felt, to partake in the wonders I’ve experienced. I want to see it all again -as if it were the first time- with you!” 

—-

So as it turns out you cant just always go back to something you were writing months before and expect to remember what it was you were going to write. 

I think it was going to be like: 

Arsay is moved but she’s in too deep now. She doesn’t think shes good enough for anyone and definitely not graha. If he was the hero, she was the villain. She cant see herself past that role anymore. But god she is just so sad about it. She stops trying to slice g’rahas throat and just cries on him for a bit. He hugs her, maybe gives a little kiss on her poor little head. A comforting kiss not a romantic one. She needs it.

Then the castle starts shaking for real. The bombs went off and the place is collapsing. G’raha pulls them both off the ground and they start booking it to a window to jump out of. They can land in the water below and itll be fine. Garlemald will think arsay died in the building and she can start a new life once they emerge from the river. Happy ending is that they both jump and arsay redemption arsay begins from that point in stormblood through whatever the hell shadowbringer would be and cap off in endwalker. Bad end is G’raha feels at the last second that arsay let go. He turns as he falls to see her with a regretful smile and then the building crumbling with her in it. She later comes back in endwalker in zenos’s place and their big fight at the end of the universe resolves with them finally making up for real and also making out and the power of love saves all of creation. the end. 

wolgraha week 2023 - Day 6 : Au

GrahArsay AU in which they both end up being child soldiers in the the Garlean Empire's Army. Only to later in life find themselves on opposing sides.

[hollis-art]

spiderman data. or interweb? idk i haven't actually figured out his name yet

his design is based on a Velvet Spider! i know very little about them, but i thought it suited him from what i learned :)

[starry-sophrosyne]

Is it maybe a little pretentious to have my persona be more.. god like? Perhaps- XD

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In one manner, Starry is a sovereign of the night sky, the stars at dusk. She watches over the world, spanning across several universes, and her domains resides above them all. She spends her time watching over the little people in their worlds, embarking on journeys, meeting strife, falling to love and loss. She does not instill fate, she simply watches, but she knows of what is to come. She does not exist to any of them, as a concept outside of their universe, the goddess of their gods. And yet?

In another manner, she is nothing. Nothing omnipotent or all-powerful about her, other than her regal/elegant looks. She is a big nerd at heart, kicking her feet and giggling at people's writings and aus. She may have curved horns and stars dotting midnight skin, but she is no more of a god than a human wearing a yellow poncho. She resides our with the community and has the niche ability to summon a blue martini glass that she can communicate through/physically embody if need be. Why? Comedic humor. XD /hj /silly

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Starry & Rosyne's designs :

----------- Self-Insert designs below ----------

Clique's Angel au :

Starry's TTOS au :

Swizard's maidpocalypse "au" :

[thatonepikminperson]

Tomorrow bois, y'all get to see my oc's...

and like the essay I wrote about each one of them...

I'M NORMAL ABOUT THE LITTLE PEOPLE IN MY HEAD

[scatterpatter]

So I made a sketch comic- sort of a vent, I guess? Mainly about plurality, and feelings on a past abuser and the lingering trauma, all to a part who didn't experience the trauma for himself... But realized it could be quite triggering so heed the following warnings!

Mentions of trauma and abuse (nothing explicit), showing alters in distress from the trauma

Speaking to the abuser in second person, in a very personal context (ex. "You did this to me" language). This comic is not targeted towards any of my followers/mutuals/anyone who sees it, but if you are easily triggered or otherwise made uncomfortable by the very personal language usage, please skip and know this is not targeted towards you

Eye contact and unsettling eye imagery

Brief blood imagery and mentioning wanting to bring harm to an abuser

All under the cut, proceed with caution!

I want to make it clear: We are okay, I just wanted to express my personal feelings on dealing with one of my system's traumas.

And for legal reasons: I do not actually wish to harm anyone, and have no intentions to do so. I harbor malice, and went a bit harsh on the imagery/language used to depict my malice, but our system is safe and we don't intend to bring any harm to anyone, regardless of how they harmed us

... Also if you got this far, bonus doodle of how me and one of my alters is now unwinding, to bring the positive vibes back <3

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

oh my god what happened?? are you alright? do you need any help?

alright i will preface this by saying that physically, i am COMPLETELY FINE. please don't worry about me too much, i promise i'm physically okay and it's not that bad

the rest is under the cut not for length but in case people want to skip past it (warning for people being unpleasant)

so the short story is that someone i thought was an online friend suddenly sent me a pretty awful DM before blocking me. they said a lot of genuinely hurtful things which wasn't really good for my mental state since they preyed on a bunch of my insecurities, and i thought that i could trust this person. i'm doing better now thanks to my irl friends, but recovery is a process as usual. i'm not sure if you can really help apart from being emotional support, but your concern is appreciated nonetheless <3

[letsmcfreackingloseit]

I JUST SAW MATPAT IN THEATERS AND IT WAS AWESOME AND I'M SO HAPPY

[camellcat]

starting a new save since my old one isn't available, so welcome to cam's ark diaries!! to start off: we already lost my first dino, longing the dilophosaurus, who I did not get a screenie of. but I wasn't expecting her to last long, so I'm not too sad. I just wanted a companion while I got situated

here's the main squad I've chosen so far though!!

I found sweet pretty much right after longing died. we almost ran into a spino while trying to remember where the hell I set down my camp, but I realized before it saw us and got us tf out of there. once we'd swam onto a different island, I found us iggy! he was suchhh an exciting find. I love iguanodons cause they're quick lol they're fun steads. I just got dimitri as I'm writing this, and he's in my favourite dimorphodon colours so I'm hoping to keep him and sweet for a longgg time

also I'm certainly charmed that these two seem to match. if they don't have the same exact pallet, they're definitely similar!

while out on iggy looking for stone, I came across a sarco. reminds me, I want to tame one asap! last save, I had a sarco named mortar, and she was the absolute mvp of my team. other than hallow the spino ofc! but seriously, she rocked major ass, and I want one again. not confident enough to go out and try and tame it yet since I'm still trying to build up my base, but now that I've seen a spawn point I'll go and revisit it later

I'll admit I have been silently building an army of... "lystrosaurus"es just to get passive xp on sweet and dimitri while I'm off with iggy resource gathering, but every time I try and bring them along just to get sweet in on some action, poor guy always gets stuck behind the slow things. I'm trying to give him easy hunts but he can't get past the damn things so iggy always takes the kills lol

ahh, first death that's hurt my heart this run and made me pause. my first few dilos always kick it, but I really was hoping I'd be able to keep sweet safe if I simply kept him away from everything

I hate therizs so, so much in this game. ever since my first run-in, when I didn't know how they worked and got my shit kicked in, I always avoid them as best as possible unless I'm certain it's a fight I'll win. but they sure LOVE to walk right up to me! I saw iggy crest a hill when I respawned with the theri right behind him. I've yet to see a death message... iggy's faster, but who knows how it'll go

in some good news, dimitri did what I wanted and flew away at the first sign of trouble!

my dimorphs usually have the same track record as my dilos, but fingers crossed for this special little guy, huh?

having sweet lying out on the beach just felt. wrong, to me. I dragged him onto my base. the fact he seemed to curl up made me feel worse

the thing that gets me the most is how pretty these pictures are though. I really want to draw them. I think I am more upset than I originally suspected I would be. I'll give him a grave, later

as I continued cleaning up the beach, I found a pair of sisters. their colours intrigued me and I tamed them

idk what I'm gonna name them yet. they may not even GET a name. I'm still a bit bitter about sweet and the fact I watched the dark one eat his corpse right in front of me after I'd gotten her

been obsessively checking the log. found out iggy's fate finally

I know I could've saved him if I'd gone looking for him, but I'm not too upset about it. iggy would've gotten a better name if he was much more than just a quicker way to get around. though he was very pretty. I am sad to lose that... coat? pelt? skiiiinnnnn? I liked his colours and that's why I tamed him okayyy

holy. hell. I picked a fight with a dilo pack, yeah? whatever, fine, lit them on fire and watched as the sisters tore em apart. but I accidentally smacked a trike that was behind me as well in the process?! a couple of hits and I was out. I tried to hit the passive button before I died but didn't get the chance to. I respawed, ran over as fucking quickly as I could, and the sisters took him out??? they were LOWWWW health okay they were almost dead as well, but his stupid ass corpse crumpled as they made the final blow before me!! and yeah it was a low level trike, but these guys are dilossss? so, yes, I've decided they deserve names

meet: dereka and dani, the sisters

I think this is a nice place to end my first session out for the night. a hopeful note for next time. I haven't really talked about it, but I finished the basics of my base, so you'll probably see more about that in the next entry

signing out, cam

[underskz]

➪ ‘TIL NEXT TUESDAY

➪ mark lee x cisfem!reader ✩ w.c 8.5k — NSFW ✩ 18+ minors dni —

✰ NON-IDOL AU

pov: you're a camgirl with a secret admirer who's a little (okay maybe a lot) obsessed

note: y'all do not understand the pain,,, the struggle,,,, the trauma that this fic has inflicted upon me <//3 i quite literally started writing it last year on mark lees stupid lil bday and have been typing away at it for so mf long and have had to dig into the deepest filthiest depths of my brain to finally finish this,,,,, anyways welcome to my twisted mind and we can all blame mark lee my greatest enemy,,,, i hate u… anyways pls make note of the warnings !!! btw don’t ask me what website they’re using idk i couldn’t be fcked to think that hard

warnings: NSFW CONTENT, aka smut, obsessive behavior, viscerally lewd comments, uh lying LOL, wolf in sheep’s clothing energy (good church boy mark lee and his hidden demons <3), honestly both reader and mark r freaky (aww they match each others freaks!), readers thinly veiled shame kink, unsafe sex/no condom, barely any prep lol, not beta read bc im a full send girl (sorry for any typos etc LMAO)

There’s clearly something wrong with user ‘66golden_boy99’ and you can’t quite figure it out. Sure, he seems to be just another fan of your work. And maybe his comments tended to be on the imaginative side.

i wanna dick you down til next tuesday

stuff your guts this thursday and stay buried in you thru the weekend

til youre cryin to me about how you can feel my dick in your throat

how pretty would you cry for me?

That little voice in the back of your head whispers (the one that sounds far too much like Donghyuck), an annoying little I told you so, someone was bound to get obsessed. It wasn’t like you never considered or even feared the possibility. 

But these comments, this person, there was something there. You click into a different video, scrolling down to a specific cluster of comments.

i wanna ruin you so fuckin bad

ruin that pussy for anyone else

wanna hear you beg me to stop 

until it turns into begging me for more

sound fun sweetheart?

Every video, every clip, every single little teaser you post; there’s a thread from him. His stupid username right there, ‘66golden_boy99’ and a digital paper trail that ranges from being unforgivably horny to borderline demented and most of the time a combination of both. 

fuck if i could keep you in a little cage…

i’d fuck u every day all day

turn you into my perfect little pet

made just for my cock

don’t you want that too?

You can’t help but let your mouth gape at that one, a cage? Your head spins at the thought, trying (and failing) to not let your imagination wander.

There’s a certain thrill that crawls down your spine, twisting itself deep into your gut and lodging itself there. An ache that just you can’t quite itch yourself, barely sated by these comments. 

So yeah, there’s definitely something wrong with user ‘66golden_boy99’ but that could only mean there’s something wrong with you.

“Mark, read this! Isn’t it insane?” Donghyuck all but smacks him in the face with your phone.

“Oh! Um.” He immediately flushes, no doubt flustered by the nature of the comments along with the fact he’s one of your few friends who still gets a little red in the cheeks by your choice of profession. 

Good church boy Mark Lee at your service. Who thankfully plucks your phone from Donghyuck and passes it back to you— most likely to avoid further being subjected to such filth in broad daylight. 

“Don’t bust a tit Hyuck, it’s just some dude living out his freaky fantasy while hiding behind a screen.” You knew it was going to be brought up the moment you saw your friends, but you had hoped that Donghyuck would have the decency to not mention it while seated outside a popular cafe on a busy street.

Jokes on you for thinking he could keep his cool about this. The moment you had sent a screenshot to the group chat Donghyuck had been rearing for a fight, overly scandalized and always righteous whenever he thought his friends were being treated badly.

There was no way in hell you’d tell him those comments piqued your debased interest.

“It’s a little creepy.” Jungwoo settles on, stealing a blueberry off of your parfait. “He doesn’t message when you’re live though.”

“Nope, only comments on clips and videos.” You bite back your disappointment, maintaining an almost clinical tone.

“Does he even watch your streams?” Jungwoo questions as he attempts to swipe a strawberry this time, narrowly thwarted by you whacking his hand with your plastic spoon. 

“What difference does it make? He’s a fucking perv!” Donghyuck snipes.

The answer is yes, he does watch every single one of your streams. Occasionally donates too, yet no messages. No live interactions.

“Hyuck, my whole fanbase are pervs.” You ignore the glare of an elderly woman as she passes by your table. “When did you become such a prude?”

It’s enough of a jab to send the man into a fit, ranting and raving about how he’s perfectly freaky enough and that his boyfriend(s) is (are) so into how weird and kinky he could get. 

“Seriously though, is he scaring you?” Mark whispers, careful to not catch Donghyuck’s attention lest he starts laying into you about your “creepy” admirer again. Mark’s considerate like that.

For a moment you sit with the question, mindlessly spooning around your half eaten parfait. Were you scared? You knew full well you were bound to deal with the occasional creep when you decided to pursue camming as a full-time job after university. 

But you weren’t— aren’t scared, initially you had maybe been a bit unnerved. Yet you hadn’t shared the messages because you wanted your friends to “save” you or anything. More so because you were shocked by the sheer audacity and of course by what was being said.

If Donghyuck wasn’t so busy talking about getting spit roasted much to the horror of Jungwoo, he’d be pestering you for the answer too. And you would’ve lied, told him that you were a little nervous but nothing that’d keep you from carrying on as usual.

Instead you have Mark asking, no trace of judgment behind his thick rimmed glasses, just a curious glint with a healthy dash of concern for a friend.

“He’s not.” Is what ends up coming out. It’s simpler than the whole truth, cleaner as well. 

You couldn’t admit to one of your best friends that it sent a thrill down your spine, to have someone so obsessed they comment utter depravity on every post you make. That you’ve checked to make sure this mystery creep was watching your every stream. And that there’s nothing you’ve ever wanted more than to be craved so deeply, to be ached for, to be someone’s sole obsession. 

“If you do get freaked out or anything, uh understandably so, we’ll figure something out. I’ll beat him up?” Mark offers one of his dorky smiles, and despite his statement inspiring little hope — seriously Mark is way too sweet to ‘beat’ anyone up — you still appreciate the sentiment. Offering him a big spoonful of whipped cream and strawberries for his valiant statement.

“Hey! Why does Mark get fed and I have to fight for a crumb?” Jungwoo cries out only causing you to roll your eyes and spark even more outrage from him.

You're thankful that the rest of the outing goes on without another mention of a certain fan of yours. Though Mark seems to be shooting more indiscernible looks your way than usual, but that’s easy to chalk down as him just projecting his own anxieties onto you.

When you all start to bid farewell Donghyuck wastes a few minutes to preach about the dangers of internet strangers, while Jungwoo goads and teases him until his nagging is turned onto Jungwoo.

Again Mark offers comfort — though you really have no need for it, considering the fact you honestly are enjoying the debased behavior more than you maybe should — and you pretend to appreciate it.

needa fuck you over and over and over

til your pretty lil pussy is gaping open

so i can see the way i paint you up inside

wouldn’t you like that?

Yes, you dig your teeth into your bottom lip, fuck yes.

You had just posted a teaser for your next video, a simple reaction to some random threesome video your subscribers had begged you to watch. 

And as always without fail, only a few minutes after you’ve hit post your phone lights up with notifications from ‘66golden_boy99’. You should hate how much you look forward to it— how you’re practically gagging for it (him).

You remember his first thread of comments, remember the scandal that pumped through your veins as the words registered in your brain. 

The thrill.

well aren’t you a sweet thing

He had started it off so normally.

you look like you dont care for just any kind of fun

you look like u need to be fucked within an inch of your life

thrown around and violated like a stupid little toy

i could do that

It’s the only time he hadn’t ended with a question. The only statement needed to stake his claim, to solidify his place. 

It planted the seed right in your lust ridden mind, the growing need to see more and more. It becomes a sick little ritual, to go looking for his comments just after you tuck yourself into bed under the guise of resting for the day. 

You’re desperate enough to reread old ones, to stare at the same comments from days or even weeks ago. Sometimes he’ll throw you a bone, coming back to leave another thread of comments for you to find. 

wanna fill you up so bad

make you take it over and over and over

til my cum is dripping outta you for days

so that all that’s in your pretty head is the thought of my cock pumping you full

wanna make it happen?

Maybe it’s the way you’ve never replied to them, or even acknowledge them in a stream. It doesn’t deter him from continuing, his perverted dedication proving something to you. Something twisted and delicious and all too tempting.

need you so bad

just need to use you over and over and over and over so fuckin bad

turn you into my own pretty fleshlight to use whenever i please

just wanna use you all up baby

how much can you take?

Thursday streams are one of your three weekly streams, and while it had marginally less viewers therefore profit than your Friday and every other Saturday ones, it was by far your favorite.

The chat is far more relaxed, which means you have a better chance to interact with viewers, to have a more intimate stream.

It means you can instead sit at your desk, dressed in nothing but an oversized white tee, playing with your hair and batting your lashes. While making idle conversation as your viewers dutifully pay you compliments and donate small amounts as a hello.

66golden_boy99: hey there

“Oh? Golden boy? And here I was thinking you weren’t interested enough in having a live convo with me.” You wonder if he waited for this, a Thursday stream with an even lower than usual number of viewers to finally send his first message in chat. Was your little freak shy? Only able to sling his filth when nobody was paying attention?

Too late for that, he was in your sights now. 

66golden_boy99: nah just liked sitting here and watching you too much

“Is that so?” You feign distraction, looking off towards the side as you tap your chin thoughtfully. “But here I am, doing nothing. Isn’t that boring?”

There’s a flood of no’s in the chat, messages ranging from horny to sweet about how some like just chatting and others saying that you should at least take off your shirt.

“My shirt? It’s only been twenty-ish minutes since I’ve started and you all don’t wanna butter me up first? Tell me how pretty I am?” You’re accused of being a tease, which is of course your exact angle. Some of them bite, sending cooing comments about how they’d love to see your shirt off, some going as far as to send in a few dollars. 

$200 from 66golden_boy99

it’s okay sweetheart, show em what’ll be mine

Your jaw drops, because while he had tipped in the past, it was never this much. You can’t help the shiver that itches down your spine, ‘what’ll be mine’ he says, like he already has you in the bag.

“Aww you wanna see me that bad? Everyone say thank you to Golden Boy!” You goad, making a show of hooking your thumbs in the hem of your shirt. Slowly you drag the fabric across your flesh, inch by inch exposing how you truly had nothing under your flimsy excuse for clothing. 

66golden_boy99: and where’s your thank you?

“That’s right, you were so generous after all, I should give you a little treat to show my appreciation.” Again you flutter your lashes. “How do you want me?”

66golden_boy99: spreading your legs like a desperate slut

66golden_boy99: wanna see you fuck your fingers

66golden_boy99: cmon babe show off your perfect pussy and open yourself up for me

“Anything for you.” And maybe you’re a little fucked in the head for how much you mean it. 

You’ve never had a favorite before. Nobody in your chat, comments and so on have ever caught your attention. They’ve never bothered to be so interesting, to be so openly obsessed.

Slowly you let your hands wander, cupping your tits before letting your fingertips dance along your ribcage, inching down, down, down. 

You pathetically think of him, wonder who’s on the other side of the screen. It could be some old man, or some greasy incel, maybe it’s someone you’ve met on the street. It could be anyone, and it sickens you almost as much as it excites you.

Carefully, you plant your feet on the edge of your desk, sliding down a few inches in your chair as you spread nice and wide for the camera. 

“This what you want?” The words jumble in your mouth as your fingers continue to  find their way south. You dig your nails into your thighs, moaning loudly at the bite of them into your tender skin.

Shame was something that had long escaped you in this field of work, only the tastefully faked sense of it ever gracing you these days. But there’s that all too familiar burn crawling back into your chest after almost years of nothing. Scorching away at your insides as your fingers drag along your waiting pussy. 

You’re wet, you’re wet and it’s because of some fucking freak on the internet. Your eyes zero in on the chat, hoping to catch a comment from him.

66golden_boy99: fucking perfect for me always so good

It’s all you need to keep going, to let wanton moans tumble out left and right as your back arches into your own touch.

The sense of shame doesn’t diminish, doesn’t fade as you tease your clit and pump your fingers pitifully into your sopping cunt, loudly bemoaning the fact you didn’t grab a toy. 

66golden_boy99: you’ll cum just like this baby, no toys, just your fingers and wishing it was me instead

“Nnn- please.” It’s whiner than you’ve ever heard yourself, because goddammit you are wishing it was him. Old man be damned he had a wicked way of speaking, of sneaking into the dark recesses of your mind and ripping you open. Exposing a side of you that you’d long since buried, a side of you craving to be devoured wholly.

Pleasure snakes through your body, dropping down into your belly as you cum with a whimper. You make a show of bringing your fingers to your lips, tongue flicking out to taste yourself, that sick part of you hoping it makes him want you more. 

You slump against your chair, mindlessly answering chats as you fix yourself into a more comfortable position. You don’t bother looking for your shirt, letting your viewers enjoy watching your chest rise and fall in panting breaths, admire the way the sweat gleams on your skin.

You hope his eyes are glued to his screen. You hope you’re driving him absolutely insane.

“I fear I might be tapped out for the night, but don’t worry there’s always Sunday.” You manage to get out a real sentence, your brain still a little mushy from the post-orgasm haze. “Sweet dreams everyone!” 

You take a moment to let the chat fill with well wishes, a few more donations and scan for a message from one user in particular.  

66golden_boy99: good night sweet thing, dream of me

And oh, you just might. 

Ending streams were nothing special, just a click of a button and your privacy was all yours again. Leaving you with a plethora of thoughts, a tiny remnant of that formerly elusive shame and a craving for something or more accurately someone. 

Send a friend request to 66golden_boy99?

What did you have to lose? What did you have to gain? 

There’s a little angel on your shoulder in the shape of Donghyuck, your ever annoying moral compass, telling you to go shower and to never feed into this anonymous man’s delusions again.

While the little devil on your shoulder shaped like Yuta does nothing, sits there and smirks at you knowing full well you’ll choose his route. 

You always do. 

Sorry Hyuck.

Friend request sent!

Three days go by, no comments, no messages on stream, nothing. Absolute silence.

You can’t help yourself but watch each excruciating second tick by, waiting for something, anything from him. Three whole days of obsessively checking your phone, every social media tied to your occupation and nothing.

It’s like he up and fucking forgot about you. And maybe three days seems too short of a timeline to be losing it, but this is a man who has been all over your account — and notifications — for months.

And he gets scared off by a friend request. 

God, you should’ve known better than to trust Yuta, even if he was just a figment of your imagination at that moment. Though the real Yuta would’ve said the same thing anyway, therefore still making this whole ordeal his fault.

But as fun as blaming your friend and obsessing over whether your twisted little admirer would accept your request, let alone give you something to work with nowadays. It was driving you up the fucking wall. 

You need a distraction, and you need it badly.

Your usual and immediate reaction to having nothing to do and needing attention would be to ask Donghyuck to go out and do something stupid, but the lucky bastard was on vacation with his boyfriend(s?) probably getting fucked into the new year.

So you’re left to consider your options but Jungwoo is definitely still at work and Yuta just left to visit his family. And your other friends lived too far.

That only left you with Mark. God, you need more friends in close proximity. Not because you don’t like Mark, you adore the man if anything and still consider him one of your best friends. It's just that despite all the years of friendship the two of you just haven’t figured out how to quite mesh conversationally like the others. 

You need more spark, conviction. Mark Lee talks like a wet noodle came to life and decided to use ‘yo’, ‘dude’ and ‘woah’ on a permanent rotation. 

At least he’s a great listener.

And since he’s one of your closest friends nonetheless, he would have no problem with you coming over to eat his snacks and lounge on his couch while he works from home. 

So you shoot him a text.

TO: marky markmarkly sparkly can i cum over ;P 

FROM: marky markHaha sure dude! I told you stop spelling it like that > < 

TO: marky markprude be there in 10 want coffee ?

FROM: marky markSure! Caramel latte please :3 

He even texts like a good and innocent church boy. But he’s definitely had girlfriends, and that one boyfriend, so there’s no way he’s a virgin. Is it possible to be a blushing virgin in spirit and at heart?

“Hey beautiful, what can I get ya?” The barista’s stare is nothing short of sleazy, not even bothering to make eye contact as he tries to magically see through your clothing. 

“I’ll take a caramel latte, lemme double check what my boyfriend wanted, hmm just a regular coffee.” And okay it’s a little demeaning to Mark to switch your coffee orders in front of this greaseball. 

The boyfriend comment works well enough, if you take the guy opting to just stare at your ass as you walk out the door instead of bullying you for your number a win.

Thankfully Mark's apartment is just around the corner, and somehow you manage to key in the code not once but twice despite carrying two drinks.

“Marky! Coffee!” Immediately he comes tumbling down the hallway, eyes wide with confusion. His hair is sticking up in different directions, his glasses crooked and half-hanging off his face. His sweat stained white tee, and low hanging gray sweats only the cherry atop the homebody trainwreck sundae of a man before you.

“Hey, yo, shit! Uh dude!” He stops a few steps in front of you, scratching his head sheepishly. “I thought…you would take longer.”

“Do I look like Jungwoo? Or worse, Yuta?” You feign offense with a dramatic gasp. 

“Nah! Ha…ha, um come on in, it’s a fuckin’ mess but like you know, ‘m swamped with work and…”

You hand him his latte and push past him, barely batting an eye at the nightmarish state of his apartment. There’s mountains of paperwork and books stacked along the walls, empty food boxes, bags and wrappers scattered across the floor (along with any other available surface) and you’re trying desperately to not gag at the state of his kitchen.

“Johnny would clean?” You muse as you kick aside an empty pasta box. 

“Johnny would clean.” He sighs. Johnny, being Mark’s roommate, along with (one of) Donghyuck’s boyfriend(s???) is currently on vacation. On top of that, from what you've heard, he’s barely been at the apartment at all the past few months. Definitely too busy catering to every single one of Hyuck’s whims and dramatics.

“I could help?”

“Woah! I couldn’t ask you that, I made this mess on my own. I’ll clean it er.. eventually.” He gestures loosely.

“Mark Lee.” You muster up your best deadpan tone. “I’m so bored I’m gonna chew my own hand off, please let me help you clean your awfully disgusting apartment.” 

“That bad?” He snorts.

“I think that pile of dust moved on it’s own.” At least you’re hoping it’s a pile of dust and not some undiscovered rodent that thrives in the apartments of bachelors with piss poor cleaning habits.

“…I think you’re right. Hey um, lemme just shower and change, I think I’m just as gross as this place. We can clean together. So just…” He shoves aside the pile of laundry inhabiting the couch just enough to give you a place to sit. “Sit for a second?”

The poor guy looks like he’s on the brink of a meltdown, and if you didn’t know Mark as well as you do you would’ve called an ambulance. But he just always has that air around him, exhausted and overworked— but always smiling through it.

“I’m in no rush.” You pat his arm before taking a seat in the space he so generously carved out for you. The second Mark walks off to the bathroom you make yourself nice and comfortable, switching on the TV, straightening out some of the magazines and assorted papers on the coffee table. 

Mindlessly you even start folding some of the laundry next to you. The thought of taking pictures and sending them to Donghyuck so he could show Johnny just how far his roomie has fallen in his absence promptly interrupts your side task.

But to your dismay you find your phone is barely holding on by a few measly percentages. Looking around the living room you know there’s definitely no hope in trying to find a charger on your own. So instead you head off towards the bathroom, following the sound of the shower pouring down.

“Mark!” You knock harshly, hoping he can hear you okay. 

“Yeah?” His voice comes through clear, sounding only a little startled by your sudden presence.  

“Need to charge my phone!” 

There’s a moment of pause and you can only assume it’s because his room is so hellish he can’t even remember where he put the thing.

“By my bed!”

“Thanks!”

His room is actually better than the living room and kitchen, not by much, but still better. You navigate around the clothes and books strewn about the floor. Giggling at his wastebasket full of balled up tissues and a used up bottle of lotion, you definitely couldn’t wait to tell Donghyuck when he gets back. 

Making fun of Mark was an art, a beloved pastime of your friend group. And he always took it like a champ.

You plop down on his unmade bed, looking around for his charger. It’s half under the bed when you spot it, tugging the cord only for there to be a bit of resistance. Carefully you lower yourself to the floor, yanking at the charger and forcing Mark’s IPad to come flying at you.

“Shit!” It lands next to you face down on the hardwood and you pray to whatever gods that you haven’t cracked it. Slowly you pick it up, carefully flipping it over as you prepare yourself for the damage.

“Oh, my god.”

Because it’s not cracked, it’s not even locked, it’s still open to what Mark had been watching last to be exact.

One of your streams, one of your streams with you bent over one of your pillows, both holes stuffed with toys in the perfect position for the camera to see everything. It’s not even a new video, you haven’t done anything like that in months. 

There’s a blur in your vision as you shoot up, lightheaded from standing up straight so suddenly. A scorching heat begins to burn in your gut, creeping through your veins. 

You can still hear the shower going, and you know it must be wrong, to go through his private device like this but…it’s you. He’s been watching you, one of your most bible-thumping, prude-built friends who can barely look you in the eyes and blushes whenever you or your friends make dirty jokes, has been watching your debaucherous streams and has never said a word. 

Sure, Yuta and Jungwoo have confessed to watching more than once and Donghyuck is a fucking mod for your streams. It never bothered you if your friends watched, it wouldn’t bother you now.

But this is…this is different. He kept his viewership a secret, and you weren’t sure what to make of it. Was he too embarrassed to say? Was he afraid it’d ruin your friendship?

You close out the video, looking through his watch history which consists solely of your videos, looking at who he follows — you, only you, and you can’t tell if that’s a good thing yet — and now the used tissues in his trash bin don’t feel so funny anymore. 

“Oh.” You mutter lamely as you open up his comment history. Fucking oh. 

66golden_boy99: wanna fuck you with my tongue til youre squirting all over my face

And your world collapses, punctuated by the sound of the shower turning off— yet that’s lost on your ears. You can’t hear anything but the furious pound of your heart trying to dismantle your ribcage, your blood rushing through your veins and sloshing around your head. 

Mark Lee, sweet, kind and innocent. Mark Lee, who stutters just talking about who he likes. Mark Lee, the resident saint of the group.

Is him. 

The man who’s been peddling filth into your mind, who’s been haunting you every time you decide to start your stream or post a video, skulking around every comment section with your name on it. 

Is Mark fucking Lee.

“Heya! Did ya find…it.” It’s cinematic honestly, the way his stride slows as his eyes frantically flicker back and forth between you and the IPad. “Y-Y-You!”

It’s instantaneous, his face turning a brilliant crimson as he trips over himself to grab the tablet and throw it haphazardly to the side.

His chest is heaving, panic creasing his features as you look him over. He kept the same color scheme, you think emptily, white tank top and gray basketball shorts. It does nothing for your brain as you stare at him mouth agape.

“I c-can explain?” He has the audacity to squeak, to look ashamed even. He’s trying to hide behind his bangs as they fall over his eyes, trying to look so innocent despite his filthy secret coming to light.  

“Why didn’t you accept my friend request?” It’s probably not what you should open with, and Mark’s jaw simply hanging open at the question might be a testament to that.

“…What?” His croaks, voice hoarse.

“You didn’t accept it, why? And where have you been, it’s been three whole days? I’ve been fucking waiting for—”

“You’re not mad?” His voice is still uneven, and even a pitch higher. 

“Mad? Mad? I’m pissed, you, you idiot!” And you are. Probably. Your mind so fucked from trying to comprehend this newfound piece of info you don’t even know where to begin with how you’re feeling. So mad must be the best place to start. 

“For months I’ve been wondering who had the fucking balls to send these freaky borderline insane comments.” He flinches. “Wondering just who the hell was making me feel like, like…that.”

“I—”

“And it was you! Right under my nose, looking at me with those stupid round eyes and big glasses a-and you just pretended like you knew nothing? …I got off to you on stream?” You hate the way your voice sounds so high in your ears, teetering on the edge of full blown shrieking.

“Please, I’m sor…”

“When Hyuck showed those comments were you even ashamed?” You hiss.

He’s blubbering now, eyes pinned somewhere to the ground; half cooked sentences or maybe excuses scattering about the floor with the rest of his mess. It’s all lost on your ears, a million different thoughts in your head drowning it all out. 

His hands raise as if admitting defeat, even beginning to back away in a pitiful attempt at escaping but like hell you’ll let the fool get away from you now. 

“Goddammit, Mark Lee, look at me!” And he does, his mouth snapping shut and eyes focusing on you. His stupid glasses are nowhere to be seen, giving you an unfiltered front row view of how his pupils are blown wide. “Did you mean it?” 

“Mean…what?” You could kill him, you really could because how after all these months of sending you towards the edge with the crudest, filthiest words he can barely say a proper sentence standing before you.

“Any of it! All of it, was it all just talk?” You must’ve hit a nerve. He’s silent again, eyes narrowing for a moment at the accusation. But it slips away, a fickle persona he shoves down. 

His hands lower to his sides.

“...What do you want?” His voice is more even, eyebrows knitting together. 

You know what he’s asking — he was obvious like that, his heart always worn so proudly on his sleeve — because even now with his disgusting secret out in the open between the two of you. He has the audacity to try to take the gentlemanly route of getting you to explicitly state what you want from him, if you want him. 

When all you’ve been waiting for was for him to take.

“What do I want, huh? Let me tell you what I think first.” You know this will definitely make or break what happens next, and maybe even your friendship. But you’re sick of his games, of dancing around whatever the hell was going on between the two of you. “I think you’re all bark and no fucking bite, I think you hide behind a screen because you’re a coward and you probably couldn’t fuck your way out of a wet paper bag.”

His eyes narrow once more.

“You hide behind your good little god fearing boy next door persona when you’re a freak who likes watching one of his best friends get off on camera!” 

He takes a step closer.

“I think you’re filthy and depraved, a repressed weirdo with disgusting kinks. A borderline incel!”

And another step.

“I bet the second you actually got inside of me you’d cum and cry yourself to sleep in a matter of seconds.” His expression darkens at that, and now you’re starting to think that you should stop. 

But where’s the fun in that?

“You couldn’t handle even half the shit you said online, you cowardly little prude, you tiny dicked—”

You don’t realize his hands are on you until you're backed against the wall, one tightly gripping your hip while the other lands on your chest keeping you firmly in place.

“You never shut up. Even in your streams and videos you're constantly yammering on, whimpering and whining and begging.” His voice is low, buzzing around your ears and in your head. You look down at the tent forming in his shorts, mouth drying and watering simultaneously.  

“That for me?” Your tongue feels thick as you look up at him through your lashes.

The hand on your chest inches up, until his palm settles against your throat and you're left wondering if he’ll indulge you by tightening his fingers. Even just a little.

“Even now, can’t shut the fuck up.” He moves in closer, until his hardened cock is against your thigh and he’s forcing his knee between yours. “I asked what you wanted, not for you to insult me.”

“You-”

“So I’ll tell you what I want.” And you feel so wildly out of your depth, there’s a cognitive dissonance you can’t quite escape. Good church boy Mark means wholesome activities, ice cream in the park, farmer’s markets and, and–  

“And then you’re gonna try again for me.” 

“M-Me?” It comes out lamely. Is this really Mark Lee? You think belatedly. Looking at you like he wants to tear you apart inch by inch with nothing but his teeth and tongue.

“I want you on my tongue, on my cock, want you begging for me to stop but it’s all just a filthy fucking lie. I want you to want me to ruin you, this, us.” His voice is raspier, laced with a desperation and craving you’ve never heard before and damn do you need to hear more, so much more.

“So try again. Tell me what you want.” And you can see it, that plea in his eyes for you to just say it. To know you want this as badly as he does, the promise, the threat of him finally letting go looming over the two of you.

“Want.” You grab him by the face, pressing your nose against his and staring into the black depths of his pupils. “Want good boy Mark Lee to die right before my eyes, wan’ you to eat me ‘til nothin’ is left.”

It’s slurred, you’re delirious, so drunk off the way he’s already hard off of you screaming at him (or maybe it was getting caught), at the way he’s demanding you to express your want for him when you’d rather just be on your knees.

But the thing is you always have wanted, craved. That underlying itch to see one of your best friends let loose, the borderline wanting (what you thought was) a random stranger to break into your apartment and do filthy, unmentionable things to you. When you flipped over that IPad thinking you broke it to find yourself being the object of his debauched desire, when you saw his username on the site. 

You ached.

It’s stupid and toeing the line of embarrassing with how badly you want, no, need him, how turned on by the fact he doesn’t even know which person to be in front of you. Doesn’t quite know how to be both.

“Let him die.” Is all he can say, having the audacity to take advantage of your stupor to kiss you. To push you back up against the wall and slot his lips against yours, pulling back just to dive back in before you could truly feel his absence. Over and over each one messier, hotter than the last as a debaucherous hunger flows between the two of you.

“You don’t get it.” He mumbles, pressing himself firmly against you, sweat starting to prickle against your skin. “When y-you started camming I didn’t know what to do with myself.”

And suddenly you could see it, vividly. Just behind your eyelids was Mark hunched over in his bed, one of your streams or videos playing in the background as he furiously chased his release. Only to be left wallowing in the shame of jerking it with cheap lotion to you, forced to clean himself off with even cheaper tissues and spending the rest of his night completely alone.

“Your perfect fucking pussy, for everyone to see…when I’ve been waiting.” He rasps, hands finding their way back onto your body. “Couldn’t stand it, couldn’t fuckin’ stand it.”

“Mm, Ma-ark…” Without hesitation he twists his head, allowing himself to sink his teeth at the base of your throat. Pulling away to focus another dark look at you, that heady mixture of unmitigated want and wicked promises swirling in his eyes.

“S’All I could think about, even with our friends.” He noses along your jaw, nipping at your earlobe as his breathing turns ragged. “Wanted to haul you onto the table and fuck you ‘til your head went dumb, ‘til all was left was you squealing like a fuckin’ whore while they all watched.”

There’s a cartoon halo of stars around your head, surely there is, each word from his mouth adding another to the ditzy constellation circling your brain. This is him, this is Mark ‘Golden Boy’ Lee and his once hidden (and so deliciously unhinged) silver tongue. 

“Pl-Please, oh fu— please.” His lips are back to working against your throat, and just as you try to reach up and grab at him, to try and sway him into relieving some of the tension building in the air. 

He steps back, yanking at your arm.

Yet he doesn’t give you a chance to simply fall, or even react. Instead he uses your off-kilter balance to push you onto your knees, thankful that he’s a sloppy loser when you land on a pile of clothes.

“This.” He doesn’t bother being shy about tugging his shorts and boxers off in one fluid motion. “This is how I want you.”

He pauses, as if to let you admire the view and you’re not nearly above doing so as your eyes roam so shamelessly. 

Of course he’s cut, with neatly trimmed hair adorning his groin. And though he's just above average in length, he definitely makes up in girth. You think hazily that calling him tiny dicked was definitely a lie.

Your mouth waters.

He lets out a low chuckle of all things, surely laughing at the way your eyes have widened. And maybe you did let your tongue swipe over your lips in anticipation.

“Go ahead, before I make it hurt.” His words are delayed, understanding creeping in slowly; impaired by having long let that fog of desperation cloud your mind. 

You move before you can think, nosing along the side of his cock, pressing a kiss to a cute little mole that you hope to revisit at a later date. But for now you’re flattening your tongue against the base of his shaft and dragging it up his length at a frustrating rate.

He’s heavy on your tongue, thick and heavy and so so hot, and fuck he tastes good or maybe you’re just already addicted. Doomed from the start. 

There’s a war raging in your mind, whether to try your hardest to please him with your mouth, all too tempted to hear the pretty, desperate sounds he’ll make and maybe it’ll earn you a bit of praise. Or to tease until he’s pissed off enough to throw any regard for you and your (throat’s) wellbeing out the window.

The latter is far more appealing.

Coyly you look up at him again through your lashes once more, bringing your tongue to tease at the tip of his cock, licking off a bead of precum forming.

“Are you tryin’ to blow me or piss me off?” Ah, so he has you all figured out.

“Haven’t decided.” You reply properly by taking his tip into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it before sinking further down and ignoring the slightly uncomfortable stretch of your lips. You could get used to this.

Languidly you try to mind your teeth as you sink further down, your jaw aching at the unprecedented stretch. Shallowly you bob your head, barely giving anything as you look up to meet his burning gaze.

“Enough.” He groans, clearly sick of the teasing as his hand comes around to hook his fingers around the back of your head.  

It’s enough of a warning as your hands come up to grip at his bare thighs, whimpering at the first tentative thrust. Unable to escape, knees aching and you can’t help but wonder how damp your panties will be by the time you get them off.

He’s careful at first, not to be too rough in his movements, trying to be considerate of your comfort. It’s ridiculous, and you let him know as much by stabbing your nails into his thighs only forcing him to accidentally bottom out. 

Tears well in your eyes as you choke, gagging around the sinfully thick intrusion into your throat.

“Woah! Fuck, I’m sor-”

He starts to pull away, and desperately you chase after him. But the fucker pulls out, grabbing you by the cheeks to look you in the eyes. 

“Do I have to start calling you names again?” Your voice is already wrecked, but not nearly enough, it could be worse, so much worse. If he would just fully let go. “Or are you just scared?”

He blinks at you, once, twice, those stupidly big eyes of his narrowing into something dangerous. 

“Two taps if it’s too much.”

“It won’t be.” You barely finish the sentence as he grabs you on either side of your head with both hands, pressing the leaking head of his cock against the seam of your lips, precum smearing across. You barely open your mouth before he’s shoving his entire cock down your throat again. 

You can see him, blurred by the tears stuck to your lashes, watching you with such reverence as you pitifully try to relax, still unable to avoid gagging and choking. Yet this time he offers no reprieve, keeps you firmly in place as tears stream down your face and your nails continue to dig into his thighs.

“T-That’s it, choke.” The break in his voice sends something hot through your chest, snaking through the rest of your body and creeping into your veins. How embarrassed would you really be if you came just from having your throat fucked? 

“Where are you?” Your wandering thoughts immediately cease, drawn back in by his fingers dancing along your cheekbone before settling at the back of your head.

He doesn’t even have the decency to let you catch your breath after pulling your attention, shallow thrusts turning reckless as he fucks your face with little regard for you— it’s everything you’ve every wanted from him.

It sends another surge of heat down into your belly, pooling between your thighs and now you’re wondering if your poor panties will even be salvageable after this. 

“Fuck that’s it, so fuckin’ good for me.” He bites his lip, and a part of you wishes you could be tugging on it too with your teeth. 

Use me, use me, use me. The thought fills your mind, leaving room for nothing else but Mark and his cock and your jaw and throat struggling to keep up. 

Frantically you tap on his calf, his response instantaneous.

“You good?” He pulls out again, swiping his thumb along your bottom lip to wipe away a mess of spit and precum.

“Need you,” and you could care less how your voice shakes and rasps, “need you in me so bad. Fuck me.” 

Your fingers dig into his thighs as you muster up the best pitiful look possible, silently begging for more. 

“C-Condom, need, condom.” He huffs, looking around his room frantically.

“Like hell, what happened to painting my insides huh?” Shakily you stand up, managing to push him towards the bed which he doesn’t even bother resisting. “Thought you wanted your cum dripping from my pussy for days.”

And he fucking growls, the sound so wildly animalistic you can barely believe it came from him.

“That what you want? You wanna feel me for days?” You’re on your back in a matter of seconds, his forearms landing on either side of your head to cage you in. He’s staring you down with an uncharacteristic intensity; a predator sizing up his prey.

“Ruin me for anybody else.” It comes out broken, desperation seeping from each word. How much more do you need to bend before he finally breaks?

He’s back on you, a barrage of teeth and tongue assaulting your flesh as his hands leave no part of you untouched, kneading and feeling. Just as you try to bring your own shirt over your head he pushes away your hands, allowing him to take over stripping you bare. 

Each caress of his fingers leaves a trail of fire, almost too hot to bear.  

“Please Marky, please.” It comes out high and whiny and so very needy. “Touch me more.” 

“I’ll give you what you want, just lemme…fuck lemme look at you.” He catches your wrists just as you try to bring your hands up to cover your face, pinning your arms against your sides as his eye shamelessly trace over your figure. There’s a glint of something hungry, swirled with something akin to adoration.

“Y-You like m-me, you’re obsessed.” You

“Yeah, I really fucking am.” He’s grinning, all teeth with a hint of gums that makes your heart somehow pound even harder and you know you’re well and truly fucked. “Like you s’much gonna keep you on my cock forever.” 

He lets go of your hands, grabbing at your thighs to spread them apart, callused fingers dragging up until he’s almost carelessly pressing a finger into you.

“Fuck, you can… o-oh keep me!” You whimper as he bullies one, then two more fingers into your throbbing cunt— there’s a determination bordering on desperation creasing his brow in order to prep you as quickly as possible. 

“Next time, I’ll spend fuckin’ hours doin’ this.” You whine as he drags his fingers out of you.

His hands hook under your thighs, pressing up and up until he can hook your legs over his shoulders and he’s pressing the blunt head of his cock against your hole. There’s a slight sting as he pushes in, the stretch unfamiliar and despite how wet you are some lube would’ve helped. 

But you well and truly could care less.

“I don’t care who sees this, you, I’m the only one who gets to touch, the only one who gets to fuck you like this.” He rasps, bottoming out in one harsh thrust and punching the air out of your lungs.

He’s kind enough to let you catch your breath, indulging you with a few soft kisses along your jaw and nipping at your bottom lip. But it doesn’t last long, following a sloppy kiss with a tentative grind of his hips, then a soft thrust. 

Those desperate whines you usually play up for your streams easily escaping your lips as he builds a steady rhythm. 

“Yes, yes, yes, Mark.” It’s perfect, every single thrust is perfect, the way you're folded in half, the feeling of his fingers digging into you, the strain of toned muscles under flushed skin; so fucking perfect. “Only you.”

And you mean it, fully, wholeheartedly without any hesitation. Only Mark, if that’s what he wants then you want it too, whatever Mark wants he can have.

“M’Close, fuck, I’m so close.” You whimper, raking your fingers through his still damp hair.

“Already?” It spears through your chest, harsh and burning and tears down your belly. 

There’s a split second of perfect silence interrupting the sound of skin slapping against skin, a ringing in your ears followed by the crash of your heart into your ribcage. 

Pleasure slices down your spine, rippling through your body in crashing waves and leaving your head spinning.

He fucks you through the high, any chance of a coherent thought spilling right out of your ears, his name garbled and strained as it forces it’s way past your lips. 

He slows, as if he’s about to waste both your time and do something stupid like pull out and finish on your stomach. And like hell you’re letting that happen, grabbing at his head with both hands and smashing your lips together, pulling away just enough to stare into blown pupils.

“Cum inside me, you bitch!” His teeth come down on your bottom lip, the bite of iron and tang of sweat and spit swirling together on your tongue dizzying, intoxicating. He slams back into you with a force you didn’t know he had, swallowing down a broken moan from his lips as he spills into you. 

“I’m still gonna stream.”  The two of you have settled on his now made bed, tucked under the covers. You had no problem letting Mark dress you in a clean tee and boxers, watching sleepily from his desk chair as he made his bed before depositing you in it.

“I’ll still watch.” He hums. 

“And comment?” It brings up the matter from earlier, the one you never got an answer to. “Why didn’t you?”

“I…I didn’t know what to do. Uh, it was one thing, hiding, but then I thought you…didn’t…”

“Didn’t?” You raise your head, trying to level your gaze to his. 

“Didn’t like m- it, the comments, those messages in chat, all of it. Thought you were just tryin’ to message me to stop. And then I got scared you somehow knew it was…me.” He has that sheepish look smearing his features, a hand coming up to scratch at his nape. 

You stare at him silently, watching as his eyes bounce around your face searching for some hint of what you could possibly be thinking.

“Look where that got us, I can’t even feel my legs, oh my god you have to fuck me on stream, please!”

“H-Huh? Live? Yo I can’t just-”

“Think about it, Marky.” Aching hips and sore muscles be damned, you somehow manage to climb into his lap and straddle his thighs. “Fucking me, on camera, for everyone to see just what you do to me. I’d be so good for you.”

You can see it, what little resolve he had starting to crumble, just a little more.

“Don’t you want that?” It’s his words and he knows it, starting to see the monster he’s created. You run your fingers along his jaw, settling one hand on his shoulder while the other comes up to muss up fluffy brown locks. “Stretching me on your fat cock for my pitiful little viewers to see, wishing it was them driving me insane.”

“Baby…” The pet name from his lips is instantly addicting, and you need so much more of it.

“Please.” And now you’re not sure what you’re begging for, your body screams for you to stop, to not roll your hips against his because it’s far too soon to be fucked into the mattress again.

“If, if you don’t stop doing that.” He groans. “You’re not gonna be able to stream tomorrow.” 

You blink. 

“Wow you really are my biggest fan.”

“Huh?”

“Got my schedule memorized and everything, does that mean we could do it tomorrow? You’ll fuck me on stream tomorrow?”

“I’ll think about it.” 

“Seriously I–”

“Actually, cancel it.” He’s hooking his hands under your thighs, drawing you closer. “Don’t look at me like that, I said cancel it.”  

“Mm, I don’t know if I can go again yet.” But there’s no conviction behind your words.

“You’re fine, I’ll do all the work.” You’re fine he says, it sends a thrill up your spine right into your brain, reworking the entire chemistry in there. It had been there in the back of your mind, slipping in somewhere between finding out his secret and that first kiss. 

You’re absolutely hooked, simply addicted, to Mark Lee. 

“Okay.” You grin at him.

[tj-crochets]

Follow up question on this topic that is going to sound like a joke but it isn't: How do you tell when you are stressed enough that you need to stop what you are doing and go do something to de-stress if you don't have "oncoming allergy migraine symptoms" to warn you? Like, the silver lining of all my health issues is that they give very unignorable signs when I need something (I can't always interpret them correctly, but that's a different problem). My "uh oh better go take a five minute break and calm down" sign was high blood pressure, low (for me) heart rate, shakiness, and a feeling like I was about to burst into tears despite not feeling sad Yesterday, I got very, very stressed at work. I accidentally pushed right past the threshold that normally would have been my stop point, because I did not have the physical symptoms, until I realized I was so overstimulated I couldn't listen to music (a thing that has literally never happened to me before) So I have to re-learn how to tell when I am stressed. It's not the first time I've had to relearn a basic life skill when I got a health issue more under control, but I admit I'm kinda stumped on how to figure this one out

So on the plus side I apparently unexpectedly reached some threshold of stabilizing my mast cells and have had a few reactions with no migraine or nausea! I'm experiencing acute stress without having bad tachycardia or shaking or having a little bit of that whole "impending sense of doom!" On the minus side I seem to have gone back to hives????? I used to get hives from like 2015ish to like 2019ish, when I finally mostly got my allergies under control*, and then I mostly just stopped having hives. Like. At all. I might have contact dermatitis on like hands knees or elbows if I happened to touch pollen from the Mystery Plant I am allergic to** but I did not get the spontaneous hives on my joints all the time, and now I had one on my hip and I feel like my hand is trying to get one and maybe my knee????? This is definitely a huge step down in terms of severity, significantly less likely to have side effects that land me in the hospital, but I am so confused. Happy about it! Hope it lasts! But so confused. Also (and I do remember this from the few times I got hives once I started antihistamines), feeling a hive try to form while on high doses of antihistamines is so weird. I feel like if I get into too much detail it might squick y'all out but trust me it's a weird feeling. Each individual hive since I've been on daily antihistamines, with one notable exception, lasts less than an hour instead of 24+ hours. *read: four times the daily recommended dose of 24 hour antihistamines, as my allergist told me to do **was not able to narrow down what, exactly, it is, but it was seasonally limited and limited to a certain geographic area so like I think it was a plant? Forgot to mention: I had very little overlap between the "all hives all the time" era of my allergies and the "severe migraines leading to severe dehydration" era of my allergies. Like, very occasionally my hives reaction would get bad enough I'd get the migraine and nausea as well, but very, very rarely. They aren't mutually exclusive they just seem to be for me?

[macabrebatz]

JUST THE TIP (Grommash Hellscream/Reader)

Summary: Grommash is determined to have you as his mate. There’s only one problem: Grom is too big.

Author’s note: Oh, boy. I have been OBSESSED with orcs lately. Especially the orcs in the Warcraft movie. Disclaimer btw: I don’t know a lot about Warcraft beyond the movie. I know some lore beyond that. So I apologize in advance. Also I wrote this in a way that you, my dear reader, don’t need to know anything about Warcraft either. Hopefully it can also be enjoyed as just a orc x human fic. And this is my 4th time writing smut, 2nd time writing it in oneshot format so I’m still very new to this lol. Also I don’t know orcish and the internet gave me very mixed translations, so I pieced it together the best I could.

Warning/tags: 18+ MDNI, fem! Reader, Grom might be a little OOC but I don’t care, teratophillia/monster fucking, orc x human, oral sex (f! receiving), size differences (Grommash is bigger than you no matter your size, these orcs are big, okay?), fingering, overstimulation, squirting, just the tip but not actually, unprotected p in v, missionary position, mating press, slight breeding kink if you squint, Grom is secretly a sweetheart, change my mind, love confessions, self indulgent filth, not beta read, yeah I know having sex with an orc this big would be borderline impossible but I don’t care, I swear I made straight A’s in all of my anatomy classes

Also just a for some fun references check out this post and this post about the hand size of the orcs in this movie. I find their size absolutely fascinating and I had to make a fic exploring that.

Word Count: 3.3k

Being the mate of an orc is an interesting experience. It was already uncommon for a horde member to pick a human as a mate. And it was still frowned upon by many orcs. Grommash didn’t care though. Nobody could tell him that he couldn’t have you. From the moment he first saw you he felt himself being pulled towards you.

For the most part, picking you as his mate had been smooth sailing. He had asked you to go on a hunt alone with him. Orcs hunted all the time but asking someone to hunt alone with them tended to be an indication that they were choosing a mate. You didn’t know this when you had agreed to go. But it became obvious when halfway through the hunting trip Grom had pressed you against a tree, his large frame encapsulating you. Soon the hunting trip had turned into a heated make-out session.

Everything was going according to plan. He had gotten you back to his tent and sat you on the edge of his bed. There was only one problem in his plan to make you his mate: Grommash was too big.

There was simply no way that all of him could fit inside of you. You were absolutely sure of it.

There was one undeniable fact about orcs and that was that they were massive. They were bigger than all humans. It didn’t matter your size. They outweighed and towered over every human they came across. And Grommash was no exception. He was a warrior and the Chieftain of the Warsong clan after all, not to mention one of the biggest orcs in the clan.

His biceps were rounder than your head. His hands were bigger than your face. His fingers were incredibly large compared to yours.

You honestly weren’t sure what you were expecting but when you removed his pelt you were at a loss for words.

There was no way.

His cock was heavy and hard, hanging down in front of your face as you sat on the edge of the bed. It was green like the rest of his skin, the head was flushed a purple color.

You lifted it up a bit with your hand, feeling the weight of it. It was long and thick. You couldn’t even wrap your hand around it, your fingertips nowhere close to even meeting your thumb. You were too stunned to speak and your brain was scrambling to figure out the logistics of this massive thing going inside of you.

Grommash seemed to read your mind. He brought his thumb up to your face and rubbed your cheek. He smirked as he looked down at you.

“You don’t have to worry about it just yet,” he said.

As much as Grom wanted to plunge his cock all the way inside of you, he was content with pleasuring you in other ways for now.

His large hand moved down, resting on your shoulder. His thumb grazed your throat as he gently pushed you onto your back. You propped yourself up on your elbows, watching him as he knelt in front of you.

His hand found its way to the hem of your pants, hesitating for a moment to look up at you. After giving him a swift nod of approval his fingers latched underneath the hem. He mumbled something about “humans always wearing too much clothes” as he slid off your pants and underwear.

Grommash hummed to himself as he placed his hands on your knees, spreading your legs as far apart as he could.

“Look at that,” he said.

He was staring at your glistening cunt in awe. You could hear a growl rumble in his chest as he brought his large fingers up to you, gently rubbing across your folds with his thumb. He grazed against your clit causing a gasp to escape your lips.

“So wet for me already,” he said, rubbing slow circles against your clit.

He paused for a moment causing you to whine. He shushed you as he spread apart the lips of your cunt with his large fingers. His index finger dipped down, lingering against your entrance but not entering. He looked as if he was deep in thought.

Maybe, just maybe.

Grommash leaned down further until his face was level with your pussy. He wrapped his hands around your legs, pulling you closer to the edge of the bed. He nuzzled his head in between your legs, tusks pressing into the skin between your thighs, as he licked experimentally up your folds.

You moaned, rolling your hips ever so slightly. Grommash chuckled before licking again, this time dipping his tongue into you. There was another rumble from his chest, the taste of you on his tongue unlocking something feral inside of him.

The grip on your thighs got tighter as he lapped at your cunt, licking and plunging into you in a desperate attempt to taste more of you.

Your hand snaked down, resting on his head as you moaned his name. Your fingers entwined in his raven hair, gripping just a bit. He growled in response, sending vibrations through your body. You shuddered a bit at the sensation.

He dragged his tongue against you, occasionally wrapping his large lips around your clit, sucking at the bud before dipping back down, fucking his tongue into your hole.

“Mmm…Grom, it feels so…good,” you moaned.

Without warning you felt Grom’s thick index finger begin to push inside of you. A guttural moan left your mouth as your back arched, grinding yourself against his face mindlessly. His finger stretched your walls as he entered you. There was some pain but your wetness let him slide in easier than either of you would have expected. It felt so perfect.

His tongue licked upwards before focusing on your clit, sucking it into his mouth once more. Your hips bucked against him causing him to groan. He slid his finger out before pushing it back in. He curled it inside of you, sliding it against your spongy walls. This was pleasure you simply had never experienced until now.

Before you knew it, he was pushing a second finger in, stretching you out more. Your mouth fell agape as you struggled to make any sound. You had never felt so full before. There was more pain than before but he didn’t give you much time to think about it as he plunged both fingers inside of you, thrusting his hand at a faster speed than before.

“Gods, Grom,” you moaned as gripped his hair a bit tighter.

The tent was soon filled with lewd, wet sounds as Grom relentlessly pumped his fingers into you. With every thrust of his hand, your cunt squelched, clenching around his digits.

“Grom, I’m gonna…”

It felt like your breath had been knocked out of you. You squeezed your eyes shut as your orgasm overtook you. Your legs involuntarily clamped down around Grom as he continued to curl his fingers into you, massaging and prodding at that spongy spot inside of you. His tusks pressed harder into your legs as he continued to devour you. You were sure you’d have bruises there by tomorrow but you didn’t care.

Your entire body shook as you rode your waves of pleasure, falling apart under Grom’s touch. You squirmed, your entire body felt too sensitive. Grom continued lapping at your clit, swirling his tongue around it.

“Grom, please,” you whined.

He pulled away momentarily, giving your clit a break. His fingers slowed but continued to slide in and out of you.

“Please what?” he questioned.

He leaned forward, placing his free hand beside your head. You tried to speak but found yourself at a loss for words, too entranced by the texture of his fingers inside you.

“Use your words, my dearest,” he cooed.

You tried to speak but you just couldn’t form the words. All you could do was moan as warmth pooled at your core. Your mouth hung open as Grommash’s hand began to speed up again. He watched you intently, studying your face as it contorted with ecstasy. Something inside of you was building and he knew it, bringing his thumb up to your clit as he continued to work his fingers inside you.

It felt different from the orgasm before. It felt just as pleasurable if not more, but it felt so different, so foreign to your body that it almost worried you. You weren’t fully sure what was happening to you.

“Wait, Grom, wait,” you pleaded.

But it was too late. Another orgasm hit you causing your cunt to clench around his fingers. It felt like something snapped inside of you as his fingers curled, hitting that spongy spot once more. Your hips bucked into him as you gasped, your head falling back onto the furs below you, eyes squeezing shut. Your body trembled, tensing up as you rode out your climax.

“Mmm, look at the mess you’re making,” Grom said, groaning.

Your eyes fluttered open, looking at him in confusion. Your eyes drifted down watching yourself in amazement and mild horror as you squirted around his fingers. The clear liquid spurted out onto his large hands and the bed underneath you with every thrust of his fingers.

You moan at the sight, the euphoria of the new sensation overtaking you. Grom’s hand slowed and then pulled out of you slowly. You whined at the sudden feeling of emptiness, your entrance clenching and fluttering around nothing.

Grommash brought his fingers up to his mouth, licking them.

“Who knew humans could taste so good?” he said.

“I didn’t know I could do that,” you said quietly.

The orc leaned down, pressing his body into yours and placing a kiss on your forehead.

“Well, now you know,” he replied.

You hummed, bringing your hand up to his chest, grazing one of the piercings on his nipple.

He then kissed you on your lips. The cold metal ring on his tusk pressed against your cheek as he did so.

His hand pulled at your tunic, ripping it off completely underneath him. You were now completely bare.

His large hand kneaded at your breast, occasionally pinching at the nipple. You moaned against his lips, letting his tongue slip into your mouth.

As he pressed into you more, you could feel his erection between your legs, occasionally sliding against your sensitive skin. He ground his hips against yours, cock slipping against you, causing himself to groan as he feverishly kissed you.

You knew what he wanted but you weren’t confident that he was going to get it. It’s not that you didn’t want him to fuck you, you were just worried still about him being inside of you.

As you pulled away from his lips you met his gaze, looking into his eyes. They were glazed over, lust-filled, and full of admiration. He wanted you. He needed so much more of you.

He ground his hips against you again.

“Need to be inside of you. Need to make you a proper mate,” he said in a low voice.

His hips bucked, causing you to moan as his cock slid across your folds, desire building up inside of you.

“I know. But I don’t think it’ll fit, Grom,” you said, quietly.

“Nonsense,” he grumbled as he got off the top of you.

He took his cock into his hand. It was already glistening with precum as he gave it a few lazy strokes.

“If you can take my fingers, you can take this,” he stated.

Just the sight of him jerking off was enough to make you spread your legs. You were basically salivating at the sight of him. You wanted him as badly as he wanted you, although the fear of being ripped apart still lingered.

“Take it slow, okay? Don’t put all of it in, Grom. I really don’t think I can take all of it,” you said.

He spread your legs further apart before sliding his cock against your swollen clit, causing yet another moan to come out of you.

“Whatever you say, my dearest,” he said.

You took a deep breath as Grom began to push the head of his cock into you. You hissed as it stretched the tight band of flesh around your walls. You were practically dripping from your last orgasm but your wetness only helped so much.

Grommash let out a low groan as he pushed his member into you at an agonizing pace. Pain was surging through you, bringing tears to your eyes. He was only a few inches in before you placed a hand on his chest, silently stopping him.

“Are you okay?” he questioned, a hint of concern in his voice.

“I’m okay. I think that’s as far as you can go for now,” you said.

He hummed in response.

“Let me know when you’re ready,” he said, rubbing circles on your thigh with his thumb.

You sighed, leaning your head back for a moment. Eventually, the pain began to subside. You brought your hand up to him, sliding it down his chest before giving him a nod to continue.

He pulled out the few inches that were inside you before thrusting them back in. It took everything in him to not push every inch in. He wanted to so badly. He wanted to fill you up so badly but he couldn’t stand the thought of hurting you.

You whimpered as his hips snapped forward, pushing part of his cock into you. The stretch was otherworldly. You knew if he hadn’t fucked you with his fingers earlier there was no way you would’ve been able to take the tip of him. It may have not been much but it felt divine.

“Oh, Grom,” you moaned as he fucked into you.

You could hear your pussy squelching around him as you became more wet by the second.

Your hands found their way to his large arms, holding on to stabilize yourself. Your body had a mind of its own as you rolled your hips forward. Grommash growled, halting his movements.

“Grom, why’d you stop?” you whined.

“Look,” he said with a grunt.

You propped yourself up on your elbows and looked down between the two of you. When you had rolled your hips moments ago, you had taken another inch of him without even realizing it. Too caught up in your pleasure to notice.

Grom rocked his hips into you, almost like he was silently asking you a question with his movements. He wanted to go further and you knew it. You moaned as he slowly began thrusting his hips again.

You were getting so wet. Surely you could take a bit more, right?

“I know you can take it. Let me show you just how good it can feel,” he said.

His shallow thrusts were already threatening to send you over the edge and you couldn’t deny it any longer, you wanted more of him.

You bucked your hips against him causing him to groan.

“Do you want all of it?” he asked.

“Yes…please. I need you,” you said in between broken moans.

“That’s all I needed to hear.”

Grommash hooked his hands under your knees, forcing your legs up as far as they’d go, pressing them against your chest. He replaced his hands with yours, making you hold your legs up. He then leaned forward, climbing on top of you. One of his hands was placed beside your head while the other lined up his cock to your entrance, slowly pushing in. He used his body weight to help sink into you, pushing in further than before, taking his time as he did so.

A choked moan left your mouth as your eyes welled up with tears. It was such a strange sensation. It hurt, a burning feeling seared into your core as Grom stretched you out. But the pain was also laced with pleasure.

Grommash’s hand left his cock, bringing it up and resting it by your head. He was a little over halfway in, sinking into you as he covered over your body. He hadn’t even begun thrusting yet and you already felt like you were becoming unglued.

“There you go. Taking it so well.”

He slid in deeper, another inch. Then another. And another. You whimpered, eyes rolling in the back of your head.

“My sweet human,” he cooed.

He wasn’t all the way in but his hips started moving, thrusting into you slowly, working the last of his way into you.

“You like that, huh? Like being full of my cock,” he said, picking up the pace.

You couldn’t speak. You just nodded your head and moaned.

Grommash pulled out all the way to the head of his cock before slamming back inside of you. You yelped as the sound of wet skin smacking together filled the tent. You could feel low rumbles vibrating from Grom’s chest as he growled, getting louder with every thrust. You were slowly becoming a babbling mess as waves of ecstasy began to overtake you. The pain had subsided and all you could think about was Grommash and how good he felt.

Grom moved one of his hands, bringing it down between the two of you. He circled your clit with his thumb. It felt as if sparks were igniting. Every raw nerve was crackling with pleasure.

You were panting underneath him, growing closer and closer to the edge. You could feel his cock twitching inside of you. His movements were becoming more erratic and you knew he was close to. An all too familiar feeling was forming and your body began to shake.

“Oh, fuck. Grom, I’m gonna…”

“Cum for me, my dearest,” he said.

And that was all you needed. You let out a wail as your vision clouded. Your body spasmed as your cunt tightened around him, somehow managing to suck him in more as if your body wasn’t ready to let go. He kept fucking into you, chasing his own release until his hips stuttered, bucking into you harder than ever. He let out a roar and you were sure the whole clan could hear both of you as the two of you rode out the pleasure, not that any of the orcs would’ve cared.

You could feel his cum, hot and leaking out of you as he slowly pulled his cock out. You closed your eyes as your legs fell from your chest, splaying out in front of you. You were still in a daze as Grommash sat on his knees for a moment, admiring you like you were an art piece. You were officially his mate and he was overjoyed.

You felt the bed shift as he got up. He was only gone for a moment and returned with a washcloth, cleaning you off gently.

You felt yourself drifting off. You were so warm and so very exhausted.

“Falling asleep on me?” Grommash joked as he laid down beside you.

You opened your eyes, looking up at the orc.

“Maybe,” you chuckled.

He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his side. You kissed his chest, moving up to his neck, and then his jaw, pecking the inked skin. He held onto you tight as if he was afraid you’d be snatched away from him. You heard him mumble something in orcish that you couldn’t understand.

“What was that?” you questioned.

“Na dova dra,” he repeated, this time hearing him more clearly.

“And what does that mean?” you asked.

He brought your hand up to his lips, placing a kiss against it.

“I love you,” he translated.

Your heart fluttered and you smiled. Admissions of love were another uncommon thing amongst the horde, especially towards humans. But it was true. Grom loved you very much.

You brought your hand up to his face, guiding him to yours. You kissed his lips gently before pulling away.

“I love you too, Grommash.”

[k0mmari]

SYSTEM! SHEN YUAN AU (Pt.2)

Pt.1

Im not done with this, so to the people that wanted more, here it is! I, fortunately or not, have thought way too much again, so once more this is going to be a very, very, VERY long post. If you guys have any ideas about this btw, please do share them! I really am just letting my mind wander a bit more than usual, so maybe someone else can have more structured thoughts than me lol. (Fair warning, there probably will be plot holes, so sorry in advance!)

Please read Pt.1 if you haven't, or this won't make any sense!

After SY warped away from his impromptu meeting with Binghe, the last place he would like to end up would be even deeper into the Endless Abyss, but according to his System, the next piece of the virus was here. While not happy, since his Personal System was (mostly) working as intended, SY managed to activate Ghost Mode and walk towards the next part without having to deal with any of the creatures down there. (He had to try very hard not to get distracted by the monsters, lest his supervisor thinks he also went missing.)

It takes considerably more time to find the virus this time, so much in fact, SY starts to recognize his surroundings from SQH's ramblings (not that he was interested or anything), and he feels a cold sense of dread running down his spine. There was no way he was that unlucky that the object that got corrupted this time was-

He was that unlocky. Lo and behold, after entering a run down ruin, SY is faced with the legendary Xin Mo, power so overwhelming it manifested as dark fire covering the blade. The only reason why SY wasn't immediately writhing on the ground from the sword's power was Ghost Mode, which he could not rely for too long, as his Personal System was displaying warning after warning about Possibility of Corruption and God Like Plot Point. It all meant that SY was on a timer, and if he took too long, the sword would start corrupting his System, which in turn could corrupt him.

Now, since this was a VERY important Plot Point, Luo Binghe had to find Xin Mo or else the plot would derail to an unfixable degree, SY couldn't just snip at it, which was a problem, since manual debugging took a considerably longer time! Still, he summons his Scissors and positions it so he can start at least trimming off the virus.

His plan immediately backfires however, as an ominous crack sounds through the air and he's suddenly pushed away from the sword by a gust of energy. A bit disoriented, he shakes his head and acesses the sit-

Xin Mo, the horrible sword it was, was apparently so OP that it seemed to detect the Scissors at the last second, and the thing attacked back! The metal of the Scissors was dark and broken where it came close to the sword, almost broken in half! Which, not good! It any other time, a pair of broken Debugging Sheers would be more or less fine, if not a major inconvinience (and pay deduction) for SY, but since he'd been warping all over the time for a while now, his Personal System's energy reserves were carefully rationed, and if he were to use a chunk to send the Scissors back for some emergency repair, he'd only have one chance to go back to HQ. Alone.

He couldn't delay it any longer, he desperately needed to find SQH and pray he still had some energy reserves left.

Setting his Personal System's next warp location to SQH's last known location, SY wouldn't have guessed in a million years that he would go back to Cang Qiong Mountain, but whatever; maybe SQH had wanted to start with fixing the bug on Binghe's pendant? Not that this was the right time since it was after Binghe fell into the Abyss, but SQH had never been good at warping. It takes a bit of wandering and going inside different buildings, but eventually his Personal System managed to get a dirrect ping on SQH's System, which sent a massive wave of relief rushing through SY, since it meant that SQH was still slive.

Though as to why he was at An Ding Peak, SY could only guess.

After a bit more wandering, SY enters on what seems to be a (very messy) office space, SY feels all the pieces coming together in his mind. Half sprawled across the table with piles of paper covering the entire table's surface lay the An Ding Peak Lord, which- was already weird, since wasn't this guy supposed to be an enemy of the Peak now? After the whole betrayal thing or whatever? But that would've been something to look into later, were it not for said Peak Lord casually scrolling through a Personal System screen. A Personal System that could only be used by the System's Maintanence Staff.

SY wastes no time in deactivating Ghost Mode, and when SQH's eyes snap to his, the man jumps so high from his chair he almost falls back. It's not a happy reunion by a longshot, since SY immediately jumped his friend co-worker and demanded an explaination, almost screaming about it was all his fault for doing shitty maintenence, and creating this shitty world if it's shitty OP sword which broke his Sheers? Do you know how expensive these are?? I know you do, cause the supervisor never lets you touch the good ones cause you keep cracking all the other pairs-

It takes a more or less one whole hour to calm down SY, but eventually the younger settled and lets SQH say his bit of the story: Apparently, in his messing around with the System's world creation program when he was trying to find the bug in his world, he'd accidentaly managed to get himself actually transmigrated to PIDW, though still with (limited) acess to his Personal System, which let him still send messages to their supervisor and pretend that everything was ok. He'd gotten so unlucky too! Out of all the people to accidentaly select, did it have to be the An Ding Peak Lord? Couldn't it have been Binghe? Or MBJ- (SQH cuts his lamenting when he notices SY's absolutely viscious death glare being stared right through his soul.)

Long story short, he'd initially did try to fix his blunder, but as more time passed and SQH's access to Maintenance priviledges went out one by one on his System, he eventually just... Started actually living there. In fact, he was living so well there that he dared say his life as Peak Lord was even better then when he was with the System! Of course, since he had been integrated as a 'character' now, he had his limitations, he actually managed to get to know his fellow peak lords! He knew the name of his character's family members and his disciples! He'd managed to build a life he never even thought he could have inside the System.

Sure, did he betray the Peak? Yes, yes he did. Were they all going to die in a few years time when Binghe came back from hell? Yeah, yeah they were, and he was immensely guilty and terrified, but! The plot could be changed! He already assumed someone from the System had popped up in the Conference, as when Binghe had recently made his alliance with MBJ, and had mentioned in passing this weird thing that had happened to him just before he fell into the Abyss.

Anyways, eventually SY begrudgingly accepts SQH's decision to stay in PIDW, but he still had to help SY; and so they form a plan: SY was going to transfer some energy to SQH so he could temporarily get his acess to the full version of his Personal System and use his energy reserves to send SY's Sheers and get them fixed. SQH was also going to properly apologize to their supervisor for suddenly quitting without notice AND order some more energy stacks to be sent to SY's System. SY on the other hand had devises a plan to get closer to XIn Mo without the sword exploding his face off:

Infiltrate Demon Emperor Luo Binghe's palace as a lowly staff member and slowly debug the sword from the inside.

A perfect plan! What could go wrong?

SY selects to warp to a time where Binghe had Xin Mo mostly in control, so it is to no surprise he warps to a place were the Demonic Emperor's Palace is absolutely filled with women. Not the best situation, since a lot of people could and probably would be able to see him, but with that many harem members, it wasn't too much of a stretch to assume there was also a considerable number of staff, which, to SY's luck, there was! In fact, after he managed to activate a disguise for his clothes so they matched the rest of the servants, no one bat an eye on his presence; at most someone would inquire about his short hair, but other than that he was as noteable as a fly.

The first phase of his plan was already a success, so now he had to move on to reconnaissance which was mostly easy and the worst thing in his life. He was mostly looking for Binghe's quarters could be as he probably kept the sword close to him at all times, though with how big the palace was, his objective had gradually shifted to mapping out the labyrinth of halls as much as possible (SY was very glad that the System allowed him to create a map in real time or he might have gotten lost in the first five minutes). He walks so much he even manages to catch a few pieces of gossip, though the most interesting one by far being one about Binghe:

Apparently, a year ago, the Emperor had a qi deviation where, for a day, he seemed to have completely shifted his personality; he refused to touch any of his wives and kept screaming for his long dead Shizun. SY doesn't really remember that plot point, though his wondering is cut short when he hears people walking towards his direction. instinctively he his behind a dark corner, momentarily forgetting that he 'worked' at the palace now.

At list his bad luck was finally turning over as the Golden Protagonist himself walked past him with one of his wives hanging off his arm, looking just as cool as SY had always imagined. He had to snap himself out of his stuppor though, as two things caught his attention: First, Xin Mo was, predictably, strapped to his waist, still glitched but at least the virus seemed more or less contained, which gave SY a bit more time to work, though the other thing he noticed...

Hanging onto an old-looking braid laid SY's missing tassle that Binghe had found for him all the way back at the Conference.

What the hell was Luo Binghe doing wearing that old tassle at this day and age??

A few days passed and the Tassle Incident (as he called it) had to be set aside, as it seemed that passing as a servant also meant that other servants and even some wives expected SY to actually work. Not great, he sucked at cleaning and the other servants spared no words to make it clear to him, but it at least gave him something to do while he waited for his Scissors to arrive. SQH had sent him a few messages saying he'd gotten his part of the deal done, so now all SY could do was monitor Xin Mo's condition (from very far away), and occasionally manually debug some small virus pieces that had fallen from the sword, which luckily were easy enough to deal with that he didn't need to cut them off.

The only thing that was worrying him now is how... odd Luo Binghe seemed. Of course, he was supposed to be the pinnacle of the Cool Guy trope, so some edginess was to be expected, but Binghe didn't look just Edgy, he looked straight up depressed. There were bags under his eyes, and he barely seemed to tolerate the presence of 99% of his wives, and that damned braid with the damned tassle was still there-

Point is, Binghe acting so weird really threw SY through a loop, and he may have gotten a bit careless. At a random day when SY was carrying some dirty laundry another servant had just shoved at him, he had no prior warning before a voice sounded from behind him: "You seem to have dropped something."

He barely managed to shake off the violent sense of deja-vu that had sucker punched him in the face before he realized what was happening; Luo Binghe was talking to him. Directly to him. Shit- shit! Did he notice? Was Binghe doing a clever call back, spider-man style?? Was SY going to die????

SY shakily turns to Binghe, keeping his eyes locked onto the floor, bowing as much as possible that he still seemed respectful but the bag of clothes he had didn't all just fall to the floor. Thankfully Binghe didn't seem to mind, and simply put the fallen piece of clothing on top of the others and walked away. Though, just as SY was regaining his breath, Luo Binghe's voice stops him again. "You... Have we met before?"

SY trembles something about only being hired recently and not having the opportunity to formaly meet Junshang, and it seems to be a decent enough that Binghe just stares at him for a while longer before walking away. He really should grow out his hair if even the Emperor got weirded out like that...

Binghe started eyeing SY way more after that day. The protagonist would rarely speak directly to him, but SY could feel his gaze as if it were burning; though, since Binghe never said anything, SY just assumed that whatever Binghe's problem with him was, it was likely nothing to worry about.

In fact, it probably was because one of Binghe's wives had used SY is an impromptu act to try to get Binghe jealous (he just frowned, separated the two and walked away) and after that she had gotten infatuated with him, so she'd turned SY into her personal servant. Because of that SY saw Binghe at most two times a week instead of the 50% chnace of seeing his shadow once a week. Wow.

Because of this, as much as Binghe noticed SY, SY noticed Binghe as well, the protagonist seeming to get even more down as the days went. The tassle was still braided in his hair (SY worried it was just going to become a lock at this point), his eyebags never seemed to leave his eyes, and he was always muttering about... something. (SY managed to overhear something about 'fairness' and what Binghe actually wanted...?)

It all culminated at a seemingly random night. Most of the wives and servants had gone to sleep, only the more in-human women still hanging around, and SY, of course, but mostly it was because he wanted to see how close he could get to Binghe's quarters (aka Xin Mo) at night. Not that it was necessary, as when he was walking his attention was adruptly caught by the strangest sight: Luo binghe, sitting on one of the stone stair that lead to one of the many courtyards, being absolutely drenched in rain. The weirdest part was that a few servants and wives had also passed this place, and they all seemed like they didn't see Binghe, or didn't care.

Hating to see such an usually proud man (not that he'd seen much of that either) just soaking outside as if he'd just caught the love of his life cheating with another man, SY decided that at least he'd do a good job as a servant and take care of 'his Lord'. He grabs an umbrella from one of the adjacent rooms and slowly walks outside, covering Luo Binghe's form, not really caring if he was also getting soaked.

They stayed silent for who knows how long, but eventually, Binghe's eyes that had been laser focused on the horizon slowly blink once, as if coming out of a trance, and slowly move to SY's face, up to his hand holding the umbrella. "My Lord should get back inside. He'll get sick that way." SY half murmurs.

Binghe doesn't respond, though after a few seconds, his eyes seem to widen a bit and his breath comes out a little shaky. SY doesn't dare comment on it.

"Have we met before?" Luo Binghe asks again.

"...Yes." Shen Yuan says.

Binghe closes his eyes, and they stay like that for another hour.

Pt.3

[heejamas]

𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐬 ⋰˚ ☆🍿🎞️

⭒ pairing: heeseung x fem!reader

⭒ synopsis: every thursday night, you walk into the theater alone, big popcorn in hand, like it’s a sacred ritual. heeseung, the overworked (and nosy) employee, can’t help but wonder—do you just hate people, or are you on a mission to watch every movie ever made? either way, he’s starting to think he kinda wants to be your plus-one.

⭒ genre: social media au (smau), fluff, crack, strangers to lovers, movie theatre au

⭒ status: ongoing

⭒ playlist: like the movies - laufey

⭒ warnings: profanity, sexual jokes, weed consumption, alcohol consumption, cursing, ignore timestamps please!!! it's all crack zero braincells kinda au (again)

⭒ incoming chapters

⭒ profiles: 1 | 2

0. teaser 🎥

1. when harry met sally

2. anyone but you

3. how to lose a guy in 10 days

4. there's something about mary

5. notting hill

6. you've got mail

7. wedding crashers

8. the proposal

9. coming soon...

author's note: hi besties !! this is my second long smau and my first one about heeseung (aka my bias, so you know i’m putting my whole heart into this). i hope you guys love it as much as i love writing it !! if you wanna be part of the taglist, just comment on this post <3

(btw, i imagined the drake & josh movie premiere to get into the vibe. that’s the energy we’re channeling here.)

my masterlist 📎 | previous smau: nicest guy 🏈

[webslinger-holland]

okay I love bucky and all the boys honestly so can you write one where they get a goodnight kiss for the first time? love your writing btw!

Prompt: Bucky, John, and Bob receive a goodnight kiss

Warning: the implication of wanting to stay the night ;)

It had been a long night; the gala ended up lasting way longer than anticipated. The Thunderbolts were being honored by Valentina, which was just another way for her to get good public press shots. Since it was hosted by her, that meant the guests of honor had to stay the whole time.

By the time the night was over, all of them were beyond exhausted and ready for a quiet night in the hotel room she'd booked for each of them. It was nice when he offered to walk you back to your room, even after spending many hours chatting and drinking together.

Bucky:

Walking side by side through the quiet hotel hallway, you carried your heels in hand. He kept his hands deep in his pockets; his eyes trained on the patterned carpet below and counting the steps until reaching your hotel room.

Coming to a slow stop, you paused for a second in front of your door. You turned to face him, rocking on the heels of your feet and clutching the room key tightly.

"You know..." Bucky tried to make it sound as casual as possible. He scratched the back of his neck and avoided eye contact at first. "We don't have to say goodnight to each other tonight."

A smile crept onto your lips at the proposal. "Enjoy my company that much, huh?"

"More than you know," Bucky spoke so softly, it nearly melted your heart right there.

Your eyes searched his as if trying to read him like a book. Instead of answering, you reached up and hooked two fingers into the front of his shirt collar — that small space between his open jacket and the buttons underneath.

You tugged gently, drawing him closer. His breath hitched when he realized.

And then your lips found his. One kiss that felt heavier than all the things he’d wanted to say. His hands found your waist automatically, like they belonged there and planned on staying there. Your fingers didn’t let go until it ended.

When you did pull back slowly, you looked up at him with an unreadable expression. Your fingers brushing down the front of his jacket. He leaned forward to chase your lips, but your hand stopped him.

“I’m going to bed,” you told him before he was able to take it a step further.

“I could—” Bucky began.

“Alone.” You smiled because Bucky looked only slightly disappointed.

"Right," Bucky nodded. He took a step back to give you space, shoving his hands back down into his pockets.

“But thank you for walking me.” You patted his chest twice and then headed into your hotel room for the night, knowing that you were leaving him wanting more.

John:

Coming up to your room, the laughter slowly began to die out. It was the kind of shared laugher that felt similar to a post-adrenaline high where everything felt lighter than it should. Shoulders brushed together teasingly.

John stopped short. He ran a hand through his hair and —for some reason— looked more nervous than his usual cocky and confident self. He kept gesturing with his hands, trying to sound casual.

“I mean… I could come in,” John suggested, fast and casual, like it wasn’t a big deal to him. He even shrugged. “Not for anything, just like—talk. I don’t often fall asleep right away and you—uh…”

He only stopped talking when he saw the amused look on your face. He narrowed his eyes at you as if trying to figure out what was going on in that head of yours.

"What?" John smiled. You shrugged.

“You’re cute when you do that,” you confessed.

“Do what?” John swallowed, shifting from one foot to another like a nervous schoolboy.

You took a step forward and slipped your fingers into his tie — right near the knot. His words died in his throat and he swallowed hard again.

“Talk like you’re not sure if I want you here.”

You gave the tie a slow tug — just enough to make him lean down to meet you. He didn’t resist. His lips parted like he might say something — but you kissed him before he could.

His hands came up like he wasn’t sure if he should touch you. But he did. Just you waist. Just enough for him.

It was unhurried and surprisingly soft for how much heat had built up between you. Your fingers stayed curled in his tie even as you drew away from him.

He stared down at you like you just handed him the world in the palm of your hand. You watched the way his eyes darted back down to your lips like he wanted another taste and he even dared ask.

“So, uh… does that mean—” John wondered.

“Goodnight, John.” You stepped away.

“Right. Right. Yeah. That.” John ran his palm over his mouth and down his beard. The door closed in his face and left him more flustered than he'd care to admit.

Bob:

The walk back to the hotel had been quiet for the most part. The air heavy with things neither had said out loud. He particularly had been quiet since the gala ended — not brooding, just stuck in thought. His shoulder brushed yours more than once. And you once caught him staring at you.

The two of you came to a slow stop in front of your hotel door. You fished your hotel card out of your clutch purse, holding it up for him to see. He sent you a tight lined smile.

"Well, this is me." You motioned to the door right behind you and Bob nodded without making eye contact with you. "I really enjoyed tonight," you tried to catch his eye.

"Yeah?" Bob glanced up, somewhat surprised. He smiled in recollection. "Me too."

You turned to scan your card against the reader, but Bob —with a sudden burst of courage— stopped you in your tracks.

“You don’t have to go in yet,” Bob said gently, drawing your attention back to him.

"No?" You quirked an eyebrow curiously.

“Y—You could come back to mine,” Bob almost couldn't believe the words coming out of his mouth. The moment he saw the look of surprise on your face, he quickly backtracked with: “Only if you want. I’m not—”

You smiled reassuringly and he looked so hopeful. Not expectant. Not pushy. Just hopeful.

He kept talking. And saw the way you moved closer to him.

"We could watch a movie, eat some snacks, or just talk if you want to." Bob's voice was growing quieter the closer you got to him. His eyes searching your face for some kind of sign of interest.

"Just talk?" You teased a little.

"Yeah," Bob squeaked, though he didn't mean to. He coughed and cleared his throat a little, shrugging it off like it was nothing. "Or any of the other things."

"Very tempting," You nodded.

"Yeah?" Bob looked up.

You were close enough to him now. You reached out to lay your hand flat against his chest, slowly dragging it up, and snaking it behind his neck. You pulled him down until your lips met his in a slow and deliberate kiss. He melted into it like he’d been holding his breath all night.

Your other hand moved to grab the lapel of his jacket— not to pull him any closer, but just to stay grounded. His hands hovered at the spot right above your waist, too fearful to place his hands there.

The kiss was warm, sweet, and slow. And he savored every second of it.

When you pulled away, you dragged both hands down the front of his chest to smooth his jacket flat again like you hadn’t just stolen all the air from his lungs. He watched your movements with hopeful eyes.

"I'm gonna have to pass tonight," you told him.

"Okay," Bob nodded. Not mad at all. Very understanding.

"But only because I like you too much to rush this," you confessed while you ran your hands down the front of his chest before withdrawing them carefully.

"Oh," Bob said mostly to himself, not catching on right away. And then: "Oh."

"Goodnight Bob." You smiled cheekily and slipped away before he had a chance to say anything else. The door closed with a soft click.

“Right,” Bob whispered. “Yeah. Goodnight.”

SEND IN MORE HEADCANONS! I LOVE WRITING THESE

[5sospenguinqueen]

Growing Pains Pt 2 | Oscar Piastri x Reader

Summary: Oscar thought leaving was the best thing for you, but quickly realised he cannot function without you.

Warnings: Swearing. Fluff. Suggestive content.

2024 season. Childhood sweethearts. No facelaim, just rando Pinterest pics

This acc just ended up being Landoscar fluff because I consumed too much of them after Silverstone lol

F1 Masterlist

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mclaren just posted

liked by aussiegrit, ln4 and others

mclaren oscar’s post race interviews #bahraingp 

2,559 comments

mclaren please enjoy some clips of our aussie talking about the one aspect of his life NOT involved with his job

→ user1 did mclaren just hard launch a relationship?

→ user2 no because why did they post clips that specifically don’t mention a name

→ user3 yes but the familiarity of the way he’s talking about this girl must mean it’s one he’s known since he was 14???

danielricciardo caught simping in 4k

thisisnotyn oscar sweaty got me feeling some kind of way 

charles_leclerc oh god, that goofy smile is back. i know what that means

→ maxverstappen1 he’s going to start yapping more than i do

→ user4 what do you know?!

alex_albon mate, i’m not going to lie, i don’t think we can defend you from this anymore

→ oscarpiastri you sent me memes of my face. you have never defended me

→ georgerussell63 join the club. wait until he sends you reaction gifs 

→ landonorris i love getting those 

YourUserName pookie 

→ user5 um, is she calling oscar pookie?

→ user6 well, it’s not going to be lando. he was only in one of the clips 

→ user7 idk, we don’t know what happened between them. it could’ve been a bad breakup and she might be trying to piss them off

→ landonorris ew, no. it’s not me. they made up weeks ago btw. no way osco would’ve lasted this long without his yn

→ YourUserName what do you mean ew! you’d be lucky to have me

→ danielricciardo no he wouldn’t

oscarpiastri i also talked a lot about my performance in the race

→ landonorris and where is that footage, huh??? funny how it doesn’t exist 

→ oscapiastri yn says you’re not allowed to tag along to date night anymore because you insulted both of us 

→ landonorris :(

→ user8 what do you mean he tagged along on date night?

→ user9 why are we skipping past the fact that lando confirmed that they’re back together

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YourUserName just posted

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and others 

YourUserName ladies, get a boyfriend who looks at you the way Oscar looks at Lando (actually, can you get me one first because mine seems to be broken) 

1,142 comments

oscarpiastri whoa, you told me i was a handsome boy. that photo doesn’t look like a handsome boy 

→ YourUserName some people are into the serial killer eyes. not me though, that’s why i’m asking the fans to find me a new bf

→ logansargeant i’ll help

→ user10 we know which side logan is choosing in the divorce 

landonorris how does it feel to know that your boyfriend likes me more 

→ YourUserName i know how to cut brake lines

→ landonorris 😰😰

→ mclaren yn, please don’t threaten our drivers

→ YourUserName hey, i’ll take them both out if they don’t end their affair 

→ oscarpiastri and here i was thinking you would cut his brake lines so i could get on the podium instead 

→ YourUserName sure, we can go with that

user11 can we take a moment to enjoy the fact that they’ve been back together for 4 months and he’s still letting her bully him

→ YourUserName i’m riding the guilt trip until the very end 

→ oscarpiastri i love you

→ YourUserName i know

→ landonorris but not as much as he loves me! 

→ YourUserName i know where you sleep

→ landonorris yeah, with your boyfriend!

→ oscarpiastri don’t tell the internet that! 

danielricciardo lando used to look at me that way

→ YourUserName i think we should start a spurned wags group

→ danielricciardo i’ll bring the wine

→ YourUserName i’ll bring the lightning mcqueen crocs

→ liamlawson30 can i join?

oscarpiastri sweetheart, you know you’re the light of my life

→ YourUserName didn’t feel that way when you guided lando away from a puddle and let me put my foot right in it

→ oscarpiastri i gave you my socks! 

→ YourUserName they were sweaty

→ oscarpiastri it’s all i had… 

→ mclaren yn, please stop bullying him. we can hear him crying from his driver’s room

→ user12 no because the fact that the majority of mclaren admin’s online interactions are just begging yn to behave 

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oscarpiastri just posted

liked by logansargeant, YourUserName and others

oscarpiastri when you say date night and she says I’m not putting pants on 

2,329 comments

YourUserName thank you for sharing your pizza with me after i burnt mine <3

→ oscarpiastri i can’t wait to share more with you

landonorris did she hide in your neck at the scary parts 

→ oscarpiastri no she fucking laughed at the way he was running

→ landonorris you cuddled into her neck at the scary parts, didn’t you 

→ oscarpiastri i plead the fifth

→ YourUserName it’s okay, princess, you know i’ll always protect you 

logansargeant no because they had their ‘date night’ 3 days ago and the paintings they did of each other are hanging in their bathroom, and when i tell you they were a shock to the system

→ user13 logan, show them to us, please

YourUserName it’s not my fault that it’s hard to keep pants on when you’re around 

liked by oscarpiastri

→ mclaren we talked about this 

→ landonorris my eyes! 

→ user14 @ aussiegrit come get your kids

→ YourUserName don’t tag him in it. mark still thinks i’m nice

→ oscarpiastri no, he knows you’re a gremlin

arthur_leclerc not you trying to pretend that you are romantic when you asked me for all of those ideas

→ YourUserName oh really?

→ oscarpiastri i had a whole night planned and you decided you didn’t want to go out!

→ alex_albon no because you really had him stressing

→ georgerussell63 he was even messaging the grid group chat 

→ danielricciardo he had a whole group of guys debating the best alternative to rose petals

→ YourUserName because i don’t like roses 🥹 oh, osc. it was perfect

→ oscarpiastri 🤍🤍

→ user15 anyone else finding this suspicious

charles_leclerc a date night to remember, i’m sure. and not for the lack of pants 

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user1 rough night in the piastri house, he’s upset mom and wifey 

arthur_leclerc welcome to the family, oscar. please don’t bring yn with you

→ YourUserName you’re just jealous that i didn’t want dinner with you 

→ maxverstappen1 wait, i thought i was your favourite. why don’t you want dinner with me?

→ charles_leclerc you are welcome for dinner anytime, yn

→ oscarpiastri see, what you’ve done. now lestappen are fighting. you promised to keep your crushes to yourself

user2 i love how now that oscar is past his rookie year, his true personality of being a gremlin has come out 

→ user3 now that shy oscar has gone we’re seeing just how well he pairs with yn

→ arthur_leclerc and i can guarantee the grid are missing shy oscar. i have had to put up with this since 2021

→ georgerussell63 i can confirm we do

→ logansargeant now you understand why i prefer to be quiet. if you don’t talk, they can’t bully you 

→ georgerussell63 my name on yn’s phone is amelia georgehart 

→ oscarpiastri we’ve been together for years and mine is peestri pants, count yourself lucky

→ YourUserName lando’s is just fucker. 

→ landonorris the full stop included? 

nicolepiastri i have some questions 

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YourUserName just posted

liked by lilymhe, alexandrasaintmleux and others

YourUserName weekends away with you  

1,012 comments

YourUserName thank you for a lovely weekend away from the madness. i could spend forever with you in our little bubble 

→ danielricciardo oh wow so you’re both simps?

→ YourUserName look away! i have a reputation to maintain

→ oscarpiastri no you don’t. you luuuuurve me

landonorris i can’t believe you left me behind 

charles_leclerc remove your head from that poor girl’s shirt. i raised you better than that

pierregasly someone convince kiks to do this with me. she refuses to go camping

→ francisca.cgomes because neither of us would survive sleeping on the ground

→ oscarpiastri neither would yn if not for the fact that we camped in the back garden

→ YourUserName why would i want to go somewhere without a functioning toilet! 

logansargeant where is your shirt. nobody wants to see that 

→ YourUserName i think you’ll find that i did 

→ oscarpiastri she’s a big fan

mclaren please come back, we miss you 

→ oscarpiastri yn says she still has another weekend before she has to return me

→ mclaren we were talking to yn

→ YourUserName miss you too, boo 🧡

→ landonorris why don’t you speak to me like that 

→ YourUserName ‘cause you stole my osc

→ oscarpiastri no one could take me from you 

user4 no because that last pic screams engagement photo and i don't know why

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charles_leclerc just posted

liked by arthur_leclerc, carlossainz55 and others

charles_leclerc i am an incredibly proud father right now  

10,226 comments

oscarpiastri in other words, i convinced the prettiest girl in the world to marry me 

→ YourUserName and now i have the prettiest husband in the world 

user5 how is lando taking oscar looking at someone else that way?

→ landonorris not well

→ danielricciardo he cried the whole day

→ YourUserName that’s why i gave him my flowers

→ landonorris no i earnt those!

→ lilymhe yeah, i still have the bruises! 

user6 miss rabbit has fainted 

YourUserName i enjoyed our father-daughter dance

→ fernandoalo_official @ aussiegrit the monegasque is trying to steal our children

→ oscarpiastri now i’m in trouble with mark

→ YourUserName i’ll make it up to you on our honeymoon

→ oscarpiastri 😳☺️

user6 fuck you to all the bitches who said they wouldn’t last because they’ve never dated anyone else

mclaren what a beautiful couple. i think we need to put those up around MTC

→ YourUserName i think zak would really appreciate them in his office

→ oscarpiastri what makes you think i haven’t already put them up around MTC. gotta keep my wife with me wherever i go

→ YourUserName stop making me giggle 

user7 definition of soulmates 

arthur_leclerc welcome to the family, yn. even though i asked oscar to leave you behind when he was adopted 

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YourUserName just posted

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and others

YourUserName i made something 

10,229 comments

nicolepiastri and an amazing job you did, sweetheart

→ YourUserName i love you 💗

→ user8 nicer to mama piastri than she is to her own husband 

oscarpiastri i helped

→ YourUserName you contributed for like 2 seconds

→ oscarpiastri stop being mean to me or i may fall in love with you 

→ landonorris 2 second wonder

→ YourUserName you would know

charles_leclerc i’m too handsome to be a grandpapa 

→ YourUserName certified gilf 

→ oscarpiastri i cannot believe you made me read that. i thought you were better than this

→ YourUserName whoa, i have never been better than this and you know that but i can blame it on baby hormones this time

→ charles_leclerc and oscar will let you get away with it

→ oscarpiastri damn right. she just had my baby

landonorris does this mean i get the chance to win godfather of the year

→ danielricciardo don’t tell me they actually named you godfather. you can barely keep yourself alive

→ logansargeant yn got to pick me so oscar was given the choice to pick the other

→ oscarpiastri we made the decision together as loving parental unit 

→ YourUserName the decision was made whilst i was high on gas and motherly love 

→ oscarpiastri stop making it sound like i coerced you

→ YourUserName you had your top off! of course i was coerced. piastitties

→ mclaren yn, no

oscarpiastri sweetheart, i have loved you every day since we were 14 and being by your side these past 9 months, watching you go through such a monumental change, only proved that it was possible for me to love you even more. i can’t wait to see our family grow 💕

→ YourUserName i love you so much, oscie. from growing with you to growing our own mini us, i’d go through all the pain again for forever with you

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Hi, guys. If you have requested previously, I promise they're coming. I've just got them added to my list

Baby Fever Angst Series

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