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seospicybin · 1 year ago

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TOO HOT TO HANDLE.

PART I

Felix x reader. (s)

Too Hot To Handle Masterlist

Synopsis: You and Felix become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (15,4k words)

Author's note: It's kind of experimental turning this into a fanfic but hope you enjoy it. Part II will be out next week x

Content warning: This is entirely a work of fiction and not affiliated with real Too Hot To Handle show.

YOU: I think physical appearance is not that important. It's all about confidence. [flips hair] I think all women should carry their self with confidence, stand tall, and always strive to be better.

But when you look at me, I'm pretty much a smoke show [laughs] I'd date myself if I could [laughs]

My ideal type is someone with a distinct charm. I'd love to see a tattoo or two on a man and someone who knows how to keep it exciting, cause I get bored easily [blows kisses to the camera]

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

That's why you accept your cousin's offer in exchange for money that would save you from getting kicked out of your apartment and from dropping out of college.

She was in a desperate time too when she reached out to you as one of the contestants decided to drop out of the reality show she worked in as the casting director.

Guess desperate times reached out to each other.

But you, as a nobody with less than a hundred followers on Instagram and you believe half of them are bots, have no experience of being in front of the camera, doubting that you'll do well in it.

Other than that, you think reality shows are just a waste of time, they have no educational value but dumb people down.

But what option do you have? You're broke, jobless, and a week away from being homeless when the offer came.

"What's the reality show about again?" You ask your cousin, Sara.

She rolls her eyes at you, it's probably the umpteenth time you asked her about it again. "It's on the description."

It's on the pile of papers she gave you but you're too lazy to read that many pages written in small fonts with single spaces.

You have to bring it close to your face to read it.

A group of determined singles visit paradise to meet, mingle, and remain celibate for their chance to win $200,000.

"So..." you stop reading after seeing the amount of money you can win from it, "it's basically a dating show."

"Yes," she answers, "but... you will not be allowed to kiss or touch or have sex."

"Oh, thank God!" You let out a long sigh of relief.

Yes, you need the money but knowing that you don't have to do such things for a reality show makes you feel relieved. At least when one of your peers knows, you wouldn't have to be embarrassed about it. You can say you did it for the experience, but spare the part that you did it for quick money.

Another question pops into your head, "But then... how are we going to date each other if we're not allowed to kiss or touch and whatnot?"

Sara smiles at you, "See? That's the catch!"

She gets all excited in a second, "you have to resist each other from going at it," she further explains as her eyes turn a little loopy.

"Oh, so they'll be sex in it?"

She chuckles, "Maybe yes. Maybe not. Who knows?"

That's a vague answer and you still don't get how she would make money from making a reality show but doubtfully giving people what they want.

It's not like you're in it to actually find someone to date. You agree to join because she promised you more money once the shooting is done.

You're going to stay at a gorgeous villa on an island with a few people and try not to be in each other's pants, which is not what you intend to do in the first place.

What's so hard about it anyway?

Wow!

You might have missed the part that you have to be dressed in provocative swimwear and show as much skin as possible in the papers Sara gave you.

However, there's this one motto that always works to make you through the day.

Fake it till you make it and you have no other option but to fake it.

Your hair is styled into loose waves to make it look like you've been spending time at the beach and thankfully, you're allowed to do your own make-up. You put on a simple one, put a little blush on your cheek, and a layer of shiny gloss over your lips.

You changed into a two-piece bikini and look at yourself in the mirror.

Damn, you don't even have to fake it anymore. You look hot and you think that's why they still passed you as a contestant despite knowing that Sara is a relative of yours.

The first segment of the reality show is contestants entering the villa one by one, but in your case, you have to do it with another gorgeous girl.

"I'm Maeve," she introduced herself in a cute Irish accent.

You might or might have not just checked her out from head to toe before shaking her hand back to introduce yourself back.

You're taller than her but that's what makes her cute. She has that pretty dirty blonde hair and a nice smile, exuding a very positive vibe. You like her already.

The staff gives you the cue to start walking into the gravel path that leads to the villa while the cameras take you from every angle possible to capture your best features.

By best features, you mean your breasts and boobs, anything that possibly makes people think that's how a perfect body should be.

You are against female objectification but again, what other choice do you have? Giving up your principles just so you can live another day in this capitalist world.

Cheers welcoming both of you as the other contestants that have made their entrance before you, watching you step into the scene.

You can feel their eyes on you, either in envy or lust or things in between. You introduce yourself around with hugs and kisses, which is not how you usually introduce yourself.

Once they handed you a welcome drink which is a glass of warm champagne from being under the sun too long, it's when you see each one of them better.

Your confidence deflates in an instant because they're all way hotter and sexier than you. They look good in their bikinis and their hair is perfectly tousled like they rolled out of bed looking that gorgeous.

You're not just talking about the female contestants, the male too are incredibly stunning, their abs are on display since they're only wearing swimming trunks, their skins glowing under the sun.

You find yourself fanning your neck just from stealing glances at it.

"Hot, huh?" The other girl asks you, one with a perfect bone structure and full lips.

You lightly chuckle, "Everyone in here is hot," you carefully with what you said, aware that a mic is attached to your body.

"I know right?" She says with a flirty smile.

After a moment, you learn her name is Laura and she's the epitome of a hot girl. She has the perfect hair, perfect body, perfect nails, and even the way her hair parted is perfectly in the middle. Other than that, Laura, like other pretty girls, has it easy in her life, she's a social media influencer with 300k-something followers and said she's here for 'shit and giggles', her words, not yours.

A lot more male contestants enter the villa and everyone refills their champagne flutes as the temperature raises. You can't tell if it's because you're so close to the beach or there's just a lot of heat in here, or it could be that you're panicking inside and try not to show it.

Your cousin Sara is wrong about one thing.

There's not just one catch, they're all a catch and you can't do anything about them.

YOU: I feel like I'm in an ice cream shop and they have all of my favorite flavors. Vanilla, chocolate, salted caramels, cookies, and cream... [bites thumb] I just can't wait to have a scoop of each flavor [chuckles]

After the introduction and draining six bottles of champagne in the process, everyone is allowed to explore the place, get familiar with each other, and mingle.

Well, of course, you have to do your part, be flirty with them but you don't intend to go into that yet. Not when your confidence level is at its lowest that you can't even fake it anymore.

You sit by the lounge chair by the beach, enjoying the view of the beach while trying to ignore all the cameras filming you.

One of the cameramen suddenly got closer to get an angle when you notice that one of the male contestants is coming to the beach and you see no one else there but you.

Suddenly, you feel alarmed, immediately check your appearance, and got you wondering why that is your first reaction. This never happens in real life.

"Hi," he says, sitting on the other lounge chair next to you.

You raise yourself from the longue chair, supporting the back of your head with a cushion.

"Hi," you finally say back, trying to sound calm yet sultry like how Laura speaks.

You notice that he speaks in an accent that you can't quite decipher its origin, "may I know what accent is that?"

"It's French, but I do speak German as well," he says.

"And English," you point out.

He chuckles, "That too!"

"I learn that everyone has an exotic accent while I'm here with the most basic accent," you say and it surprises you how well you're doing at being an obnoxious reality show star.

He smiles, showing his perfectly good teeth, "Nah, I think you're cute."

And surprises yourself again at how receptive you are, smiling at his compliment. You laugh to yourself as you try to remember his name, everyone introduced themselves too quickly earlier and gave you no time to memorize them.

"I'm sorry. What's your name again?"

"Alex," he says, taking another step towards you as if he wasn't standing close enough.

Alex is super tall, super attractive, muscles in all the right places and you have never cared about such things in a man before. Alex has nice brown skin and soft curly hair, he's charming in a way that subtly grows in you.

"Well, Alex, how come you're so tall?" You playfully ask him, holding your champagne flute close to your face.

"I play basketball," he answers.

You click your tongue in awe and at the same time, feel afraid that Alex has raised your standards of men to a whole new level.

YOU: Alex is hot. Isn't that obvious? That French accent ooh... [whistles] and he plays basketball. He's like a tall glass of water and I'm super thirsty.

He's hot, he's tall, he speaks three languages, and he also plays sports. What else can he do? You wonder...

"What about you?" He asks.

You think for a moment, "Well, I only speak English," you answer with giggles.

He leans forward and puts his elbows on his knees, looking at you with an intense stare.

"I can speak cat language too if that counts," you add.

He raises an eyebrow at you, "So you're a cat person, huh?"

"Yes, I am."

"I see..." he says, looking at you with an even more intense stare, "you like to be spoiled, huh?"

You turn to lay on your side to show him the curve of your body and bite your lower lip as you bravely stare back at him, "who doesn't like to be spoiled?"

Alex licks his lip as you catch him glancing at your lips, he thought of kissing you for sure but has no idea what stops him.

"What animal person are you?" You ask as the conversation starts to dry up.

He props a hand under his chin, "Why don't you guess?"

You tap your lips with your index finger to subtly tease him, "A puma?" You wildly guess.

He laughs, "Why?"

"I got the impression that you're wild, can't be tamed," you say whatever it is crossed your head at that moment.

You don't think Alex would care anyway with what you're saying because all he can think about is whether he should kiss you or not.

"Am I right? Or am I not wrong?" You dare him by closing the gap a few inches short.

Yet he remains in his seat and you're getting bored of waiting already. You retreat from keeping this going and sit up on the longue chair.

"I think I have to start getting ready for the party," you excuse yourself.

You're not proud that you're back to being such a bitch who plays with men but gosh, something about this reality show that brings out the bad girl in you.

YOU: Perhaps it's too early for him to get his move on someone. I think he wants to keep his options open and that's what I'm doing as well, I want to get to know a few of them and see if I... uh can have some fun.

The males are already waiting at the beach for the party.

The females are taking longer time to get ready because there is so much to do, hair, make-up and even putting fake acrylic nails.

You have lived as a woman for twenty-three years but only realized now how exhausting it is to be one. Not that you don't like it but people oftentimes don't give women enough credit for it.

"Come here, you sexy!" One of the males says.

Wow. What a way to impress a woman!

Everyone is sitting on the benches set around a bonfire and drinking cocktails with umbrellas in them, sipping and talking, checking each other out in secret or not so secret

A player recognizes another player so there's no use for all contestants to play naive, pretending that they're just here to sit around bonfire and make friends.

Everyone knows that they're here to get wild and becomes famous by doing it on a reality show. Except you thought, you don't want to go that far.

"Icebreaker time!" Says the girl with brunette hair and rosy cheeks. You believe her name is Heidi.

"Each one of us will take turns to stand in the middle with a blindfold on and anyone can do anything to that person. In the end, they have to guess who did it," she explains but more like babbling around the words while seductively chuckling in between words.

You don't get what she's saying but try to learn the game by watching as she takes the first turn to set an example. Heidi is a total babe, it's impossible if no one wants to have a piece of her.

A male comes up to her and has a deep kiss that put everyone to shame. One look and you can tell that it's one hell of a kiss. You sip the drink you've been holding in your hand.

Your heart is drumming the closer it gets to your turn, afraid that someone does things with you but it would be more embarrassing if no one does things with you.

So far, everyone at least has a kiss or a smooch, Laura even lets a guy touch her ample bosoms. You haven't made a move yet and it's kind of a requirement that you show your wild side because that's the idea of the show.

It's Jamie or that's what you remember his name is. He's taking his turn and putting a blindfold on, he looks gorgeous wearing a white shirt and short pants.

Jamie has glowing tan skin and six-pack abs, his hair must have skipped months of a haircut but rocking it all right. He keeps brushing his hair to the back, knowing that it looks better when it's messy.

You take a glance at everyone and none of them seem to make a move on him, impulsively, you get up from the stool and come up to him.

It's when you stand in front of him you have no idea what to do with him or more like, you have tons of ideas of what you want to do but can't choose one.

Everyone else is watching from their seats in anticipation, you shut down your brain from thinking and just go with it. You stand on your tiptoe and kiss him on the neck, covering your lips once you're done to not give him any clue that it's you who kissed him.

You run back to your seat and see what his reaction is once he takes his blindfold off. Next, Jamie has to guess who is it and to avoid looking suspicious, you calmly sip your drink and watch him guess who did it.

After taking too much time observing, he gives up, "I don't know. But whoever it is, I kind of want more," he says.

You try to remain calm and take another sip, looking anywhere but not in his direction.

It's finally your turn, your heart is beating faster and you wonder if the audio guy can hear it too with the mic resting around your neck.

Taking a quiet deep breath, you tie the blindfold over your eyes and around your head. You can only hope for the best now and block every insecurity that tries to reside in your head.

"Ooh..." everyone coos in unison and that only means someone is coming or about to do things to you.

Nervous, you clench and unclench your fists to calm yourself. Then a pair of hands gently cup your face and tilts your head upward.

Not ready for it, this mysterious person kisses your open mouth and proceeds to kiss you more, using his tongue in the most pleasurable way to taste you.

Damn! He's a good kisser and you reflexively respond to his kisses with your hands holding theirs. For a split second, you forget that you're in the middle of shooting a reality show and everyone is going to watch it.

You gasp the second they let go and have you fixing your lipstick because there's no way that phenomenal kiss not smudging it.

"Whoa. Can barely think after that kiss," you shamelessly tell everyone as you act drunk as you walk back to your seat.

Sipping your drink, you secretly assess everyone and try to guess which one of them kissed you. They're all hot anyway, it's not a loss to kiss one of them and you didn't know why you were fussing about it earlier.

Since Laura is taking the last turn and everyone seems to be whipped by her, you can see that all the male contestants anticipated this. You bet they're lining up to get a kiss from her.

It takes only a few seconds for anyone to make a move, the first one to have it is Daniel with half of his body covered in tattoos. He has a lean body and that bad boy attitude, he confidently strides to kiss Laura on the lips, so hard that she gasps in surprise.

You find yourself clapping at two people doing lewd things in front of a group of people. When you think Daniel is the only one succeeding in having a piece of Laura, another one takes his turn.

You almost scoff seeing Alex holds her by the neck and kisses her so deeply. Instant turn off, all those charms he has seems to be wiped off your head in a second.

YOU: Well, now we all know why Alex didn't kiss me [laughs] He likes someone else and that's good, I'll stop chasing him from here [sucks air through teeth] and on to the next one! [Raises hand triumphantly]

Moving on to the next segment, you prepare yourself for your act.

Sara is nice enough to let you know what the show is really about. When you ask everyone else, they believe that they're on a dating show and are here for partying and having fun and such.

Well, until... the cone-shaped talking pops out of its hiding and stops the party and the fun altogether.

"Hi, I'm Lana, and welcome to Too Hot Too Handle!"

Everyone stops talking and turns serious while deep inside you will find pleasure from their pain.

"You have been specially selected because you are all choosing meaningless sex over genuine relationships."

"That's true, though!" One of the males says and the other chuckles along.

"The purpose of this retreat is to help you gain deeper emotional connections in your personal relationships."

Daniel seems to be taking the news badly, "I'm not here for that!" He comments.

"As always, there are conditions to your stay here. You must abstain from sexual practices for the entirety of your stay."

Everyone is groaning in frustration, covering their eyes as if not having sex will make them die.

"No kissing. No heavy petting. And no sex of any kind."

More groans are spilling out of everyone's mouth.

"This also applies to self-gratification."

Wait! You didn't know that you'll not be allowed to touch yourself. Your body and you can't do anything about it.

YOU: The second I saw Lana, I know it's bad. But I didn't know it's that bad. Can't even touch myself? What?

"However, to aid your development, I've increased the prize fund to $200.000."

That one gets everyone hyped and jumping in excitement, including you. Thinking of that much money, you can shrug all your financial problems away.

"Each time the rules are broken, money will be deducted from the prize fund."

But this one gets you down immediately, there's a possibility that no money will be left with all these horny people locked in a villa together.

"Everyone, welcome to the retreat!"

"Ugh!"

YOU: Everyone is pissed off, including me. But you know, something about being told not to do something only makes me want to do it [bites lip]

No, you're not pissed off about it. Sex is something you can easily avoid doing, you just need to keep it in your pants and that's what you're going to do.

You want the prize so much and want to put your focus solely on that.

"How do you feel, babe?" Maeve asks while putting her wavy hair into a messy bun.

You're cleaning up your make-up with her with Heidi in the room, "I'm super bummed!" You lie.

"I'm here to have fun so... I'll continue to do that," Heidi eggs on the conversation.

Maeve nods in agreement, "Right!"

Going to the bedroom, you see the next struggle and that is choosing your bed. A few of them have chosen partners to share the bed with. You don't want to choose yet so you nudge Maeve's elbow, "Want to share a bed?"

She smiles at you, "I thought you'd never ask," she answers.

Everyone else is on the bed and you look around, catching someone staring at you from across your bed. It's Jamie.

"It's you," he points at you.

You raise an eyebrow at him and mouthed, "What?"

He turns his head to the side and shows his neck, "the kiss."

Instead of answering, you slump down the bed and giggle behind the duvet. You bet he can tell from the color of the lipstick mark.

However, from all the males you see, you can't guess yet which one of them kissed you. Alex can't be it, he's sharing the bed with Laura and looking comfortable there.

That leaves Jamie, Daniel, Cole, and Felix. It could be Jamie but...

"Goodnight, babe!" Maeve says as the lights are turned off for the night.

"Night, beautiful!" You greet back and you silently thank her for stopping you to think about boys when you should be thinking about the money.

Eyes on the prize.

The first day and you wake up feeling so disoriented. It's the timezone, the weather, and the blinding sun that greets you the moment you get out of the bedroom.

They provide swimwear in the closet for everyone to wear besides your own clothes. You pick a pair and put on your make-up after with Laura and Alex, not sure if either of them is trying to make you jealous.

It's the first day of the rules applied and you already need to remind yourself of the prize fund.

"Who do you like?" You curiously ask Maeve as you're in the pool together with Jamie.

"I like Felix," She answers without a beat.

It's an obvious answer. If this show has two main characters they would be Laura and Felix. The males go for Laura and the females for Felix. You haven't had time to speak to Felix in person then again, everyone in here is attractive.

"I think he's just so hot and cute," Maeve adds.

Jamie splashes her with water, "you're blushing!"

Maeve giggles and splashes water back at him, "what about you? What is your type?"

You didn't expect she'll turn the table at you and that you're like a rabbit about to get hit by a car.

"Come on, you can say it. Brunette with a British accent, nice smile, nice hair," Jamie playfully says with a grin at you.

Maeve chuckles then comments, "I think you two look cute together!"

YOU: I think Jamie is cute, he's a goofball. We share a vibe and he always smells so good [laughs] I can't say anything yet but yeah, let's see.

There are five males and five females, everyone can pair up and be a couple but things don't work out that way. There are so many things to consider like chemistry and connection, etcetera. However, you believe everyone is just waiting for someone to break the rules to go further.

That seems to be plausible with Lana throwing a party tonight.

"We're matching!" Jamie says.

You chuckle seeing that the only matching thing you have with him is the color of the pants you're wearing.

"You look beautiful," he compliments.

You tease him by jutting your ass at him and looking over your shoulder while batting your eyes at him, "Thank you!"

Doesn't want to be tempted, he turns your body around and puts his arm around you to lounging outside. You bet that he will use the opportunity to tell you about his intention.

You haven't been in relationships for so long that you forget how nerve-wracking it is.

"Cheers!"

"Cheers!" You clink your glass with him before taking a sip.

The sky is so pretty and clear tonight that you can see the stars like pinpricks on the night sky. The breeze is warm and salty, it's not good for your hair, you spent almost an hour straightening your hair and it's ruined in ten minutes.

"So do you have anyone you like?" Jamie asks.

You put your glass away and shake your head, "Nah, not yet."

He stares deeply into your eyes, "well, I like you," he suddenly admits.

"Like it isn't obvious," you jokingly say.

He laughs and licks his lips which makes you glance at his lips, it's round and full, glistening wet. You look away before it gets too creepy.

"You're gorgeous and easygoing and so fun to be around," he starts by complimenting you.

You don't know how he can have that conclusion when you only know each other for one day, you go along with him and nod, "Yeah, I agree."

He shifts on the seat and leans in close, putting his arm on the back of your head, "You're the first that caught my eyes when I came."

It's hard to know if Jamie said that in all honesty or to merely impress you. You saw how Alex jumped from one girl to another in a span of a few hours so you can't just trust his words.

Remember that they're all here for a reason, they're horny and emotionally unavailable. Sadly, that's what your types are for the last few months.

"I was hoping you'd compliment me more," you joke.

He throws his head back as he cracks a laugh, "I think it's your time to compliment me back."

You fold your legs on the sofa and put a cushion on your lap to play with the lint to keep your brain stimulated, to prevent you from zoning out midway.

You look at him as he looks back at you with hopeful eyes, "I think you're absolutely fit, you have a nice smile and are tall enough—"

"Tall enough?" He asks, a little offended.

You chuckle at his reaction, "In the best way. I hate when a guy is too tall," you explain.

"Okay, continue..." he allows.

"And you always smell so good," you lean in to take a whiff of his perfume.

"Good, yeah?"

"Tell me the perfume you're wearing," you playfully ask.

He shakes his head, "Not when there's the chance to make you take a whiff of it from me."

Jamie places his hand on your knee and the gust of wind makes his hair tousled and makes him look double attractive. His light brown eyes pierce right through you with the gaze he locked you in.

"What is there not to like about you?" You conclude.

He props a hand to support his head as he looks down at you, "what do you think about us?"

To be honest, it's too early to say something about this relationship. Not only that you barely know him, you don't have the intention to have a relationship at all.

"There's something there but I don't know, not sure about it yet," you honestly answer.

The hand on your knee moves up to your thigh now. Damn! Jamie is smooth.

"Maybe once I get to know you better, I'd know," you hurriedly add before he gets the wrong idea.

The next thing you know, you get yourself in a pickle as you find him leaning closer to you and his hand that was on your thigh, now resting on your waist.

"Maybe if we kissed, we'd know each other better," his eyes are centered on your lips.

"You want to kiss?" You lower your voice, afraid that there are other people around you.

Jamie leans in closer until his nose meets yours, "So bad," he answers.

Is it why he smells so good? That his perfume isn't just perfume, but it's also pheromones? You hold his chin, unable to choose whether to turn him away or bring him close, finding it hard to resist him.

YOU: Jamie looking so good tonight. He's literally too hot to handle [dramatically rolls eyes]

Jamie leans in closer and an inch away from your lips when you put your hand on his lips, stopping him from kissing you.

"Stop!" You mewl at him.

Jamie looks a little taken aback, thinking that he can seal the deal tonight.

"I want to kiss you," you tell him with your thumb brushes over his lips.

"But..." You cup his jaw and slowly speak to him so your explanation is not lost in the middle, "I don't want us to be the first to rule break."

If you were out there in the wild, you'd be all over each other by now. However, you think about the money, and spending money this early in the show isn't worth it, well, for you. Other than that, being the first to break the rules will only get you so much shit from everyone.

YOU: If we were outside, I would have ripped his clothes already by now [laughs] [facepalm] Lana, you should be proud of me.

Jamie sucks air through his teeth and laughs this off, maybe he feels a little rejected, you bruise his ego. Men are fragile like that.

"It's hard for me too," you sincerely tell him and throw your arms around him, consoling him with a hug.

"I'll just give you another kiss on the neck, okay?" you proceed to do it, placing a soft kiss on his neck right below his ear.

You hear him lowly groan with eyes closed, "That's not... uh, make it better."

He puts a hand around you, keeping you close next to him, "what about sharing a bed?"

You laugh at how relentless he is. Not only it means putting you at a bigger risk to break the rules but also, he's being haste about this.

"I'd like that," you answer, earning a grin from him.

"But not tonight," you hurriedly add.

His hand slides down your head to play with the end of your hair, twirling it around his fingers.

"Why not?"

The player recognizes the player and Jamie is giving you the eyes right now. You look away and snug to his side, "I hump in my sleep and I think you'd like that too much."

He cracks a laugh with his hand drawing you closer to him, "More reason to share a bed!"

YOU: It's too early to share a bed with anyone. I still want to get to know the other and... [shrugs] keep my options open.

The party is far from over but you feel tired from socializing, and worse is, you can't escape them since you're sharing a house with them for the rest of the month.

You decide to excuse yourself, going to the make-up room and powdering your nose, then staying there to sip your drinks in silence.

There are nine other people to get footage from so you don't have to worry about making it interesting for people to watch.

"Hey, I've been looking for you!"

You turn on your seat to see Maeve entering the room, "what's up, babe?"

She drags the chair next to you, then sits on it. She checks her hair in the mirror and brushes the end with her fingers.

"I'm thinking of talking to Felix," she finally answers.

You sip your drink before talking, "And why are you here?"

Maeve laughs at your playful response, she leans back on her seat and sighs, "I don't know I'm so nervous to talk to him," she says.

That should be your question but you know that Maeve doesn't seek an answer from you, she needs some encouragements.

"You're gorgeous and fun, I think he'll like you," you tell her with a gentle squeeze on her shoulder.

She warmly smiles at you and checks herself again in the mirror.

"But if you intend to break the rules, I suggest you apply matte lipstick," you poke fun at her.

"I should do that," she searches for her make-up bag from the cluttering mess on the long vanity table.

After sending Maeve out of the door with another encouragement in a form of a cheeky slap to her butt, you bring your drink with you to the bedroom, feeling so ready to end the day already.

The first thing you see are two bodies going at it on the bed in the corner. You don't know why but you stay there standing in the doorway of the bedroom, watching them kissing on the bed.

After a minute of observation, you're positive it's Heidi and Daniel.

You hear someone coming from behind you, you hurriedly turn around to find Jamie there.

"Get me more drinks?" You immediately ask him, trying to sound natural.

"Sure, yeah, been looking for you," he says, more than eager to take you back to the party.

It's the only right thing to do. He doesn't care about the rules and if he knew that someone has broken the rules, he will be more relentless than he already is.

Thankfully, Lana doesn't announce any rulebreaking behaviors for today, the party ends on a good note and everyone has their happy ending, at least for today.

But for you, you're just happy to finally get on the bed.

As Maeve climbs onto the bed after you, you can't wait but ask her about how the talk went.

"So, how's the talk?"

From the lack of her usual radiance on her face, you can tell that it didn't go well. You regret asking about it.

Maeve scoots closer to you on the bed and leans in, keeping her head turns away from Felix's bed.

"I talked to him and he was nice, said he finds me cute and funny," she keeps her voice low.

"Well, that's great!" You comment, a little louder than you intend to.

Maeve puts on a thin smile, "yeah so I asked him if he has eyes for someone," she says.

"Yeah and?"

"He said he likes someone," she answers.

You playfully bump her shoulder, "and it's you."

"Else," she finishes her words, "he likes someone else."

She rests her head on your shoulder and you put your arm around her, comforting her with gentle squeezes on her shoulder.

"Does this mean you're going to stop trying or...?"

"Not sure," she shortly replies.

"He said you're beautiful and funny, you should focus on that and work your way from there," you comfort her.

Men are not only stupid, they're all short-sighted, and that's why they like everything big. Maybe at first glance, Felix didn't see Maeve clearly and that's why you encourage her to try once again so he can take another good look at her because who knows?

The morning alarm is ringing.

They set a time to let everyone know when to start their day even though a few of us have woken up earlier. The lights are on and greeting each other, barefaced with eyes still sleepy.

Jamie jumps onto your bed and gets between you and Maeve on the bed.

"Good morning, girls!" His voice is muffled by the pillow underneath.

Maeve gently pats his back, "Cuddles only!" She reminds him.

He lifts his head and looks at you, "Not going to lie but I was about to kiss her until you said that," he tells Maeve.

Jamie looks so fine with a bare face and his bedhead looks extra fluffy when it's tousled.

YOU: Good morning! It's a good day, clear sky, nice weather with no chance of sex. [Snorts]

When everyone is called to the cabana, you know that it's judgment time.

You feel calm knowing that you successfully refrained from breaking rules but you know that everyone is not going to be pleased that a few people spent a few thousand dollars last night. Including you.

So far, you only knew about Heidi and Daniel but there's a big chance that other people break the rules too. It's a big place, you can't keep track of everyone.

This secret you've been keeping is getting too hard to bear yourself. The only person you can share it with is Maeve and you're positive that she didn't break any rules, not that you know of.

"I walked in on Heidi and Daniel kissing," you whisper to Maeve.

"My Gosh!" She lowly gasps.

The sound of Lana's cone-shaped head chiming and your heart leaps. You're not ready to lose money, not when you have your credit card bills spilling out of your mailbox as you speak.

"I regret to inform that there are several rule breaks."

Several? So that means there's more than one rule break? You're doomed, everyone is doomed.

"Everyone better be telling the truth right now!" Cole says as the resident's sex cop.

Everyone is looking at each other and a few are looking very suspicious right now. You bet that Laura and Daniel broke the rules from the way they avoid everyone's eyes.

Heidi raises her hand like she's in a classroom, "So..."

And everyone groans, knowing that they are about to hear a piece of bad news.

"Daniel and I, we kissed in the bedroom," she admits.

It's good that Heidi decides to come clean but it's a bit upsetting that Daniel just sits there like he didn't take part in it.

"But that was it. Just one kiss!" She assures everyone.

Welp, that's $3000 down the drain. However, Lana continues to press everyone to confess.

"Let's just get it over with, guys!" Cole adds with gritted teeth.

Can't hold it in yourself for long, you call them out by the names, "Laura? Alex? Have anything to say?" You ask with a piercing gaze.

"We uh... we kissed," Alex may have a buff body and the tallest of the bunch but he's bad at being honest like all men are.

"But it's because we're sure we have a connection. That's why we kissed," Laura is, of course, backing her man and ready to claw people with her super-long acrylic nails.

"I don't care what all of you are saying. We—"

"You kissed for how many times?" Cole cuts her off with the most important question of all.

There's a moment of silence and that means it's bad.

"Twice. On the bed and the beach," Laura answers with no apologetic expression whatsoever.

"That's so selfish!" Maeve exclaims next to you and lets out a big sigh after.

The worst is Lana is still here and asking if anyone wants to own up to their shit. You don't even want to count the most you've lost, it's a lot.

"You've got to be kidding!" Jamie groans from the end of the sofa.

Not only that the truth costs everyone money but serves the juiciest drama needed for TV broadcasts.

"Daniel kissed me," Aly finally confesses.

Everyone's eyes dart at Daniel, he kissed two girls yesterday and put them in a fight after this. Heidi looks furious sitting next to him.

"I'm pretty sure he kissed me first then he kissed Heidi," she adds, her eyes throwing daggers at Daniel.

"This is a mess!" You quietly comment and plant your face in your hands.

"These rule breaks have cost the group a total of $12.000," Lana announces.

You groan into your hand thinking that much money can cover a couple of months of your rent and here these fools spending them to satisfy their wild desire.

YOU: From now on, I'll be thinking of a Chanel handbag every time I get the urge to kiss someone because that's how much it costs.

"There are a total of four rule breaks in the last 24 hours and the fine on any further rule break will be doubled as of this moment," Lana announces another shocking news.

YOU: Great! A kiss equals two Chanel handbags now. [Hand against forehead]

It was one hell of a way to start the day.

Everyone's mood turns sour after that and Cole, being the sex cop he is, doesn't stop preaching to everyone to not break any rules.

What you fear the most with rules has been broken more than once now, it's allowed everyone else to take their turn and that includes Jamie.

It's only about time that he'll start demanding a kiss from you. Don't get fooled, men are just as insecure as women but they mask it well with their huge egos.

You try to avoid him and hang out with Maeve instead, chilling by the pool.

"I heard Irish people are a great drinking buddy," you want to distract yourself from the reality show you're in.

"I wouldn't call myself a 'buddy' but yeah, we're good drinkers," Maeve answers with her playful laughs.

You dip your fingers in the pool water and mindlessly splash it around.

"Come to Ireland and I'll show you a good time," she says.

You snort thinking that with the debt you have, you can't afford to travel out of the country right now but you can't pass on the invitation.

"Okay, I'll just go there with my winning prize," you jokingly say.

"Oh, yeah, totally," she responds with giggles but her eyes are nowhere in your direction.

Following her line of vision, she is watching Felix working out with Alex and Cole at the beach. You take it that she hesitates to make a move on him after knowing that he likes someone else.

"You're going to talk to him again right?"

Considering that the outside world is off-limits, leaving all of you with no choice but to interact with each other. This also means that Maeve will have to get a move on him or try not to be awkward with Felix walking around the house for the next three weeks.

"Who do you think it is?"

"The one he likes?" You guess.

She nods, glints of curiosity filled her eyes, "yeah."

"Certainly not you," you joke and break into laughter.

"Ouch!" She splashes water at you.

YOU: Maeve thinks a lot when she has nothing to worry about. She should just do it.

The house is huge even for ten people living in it but you can't keep avoiding Jamie.

After dressing up to hang out in the firepit, you sit next to Jamie at ease with the presence of other people there. But that doesn't stop him from touching you, putting his hand around you to play with your hair and whatnot.

"We should have kissed yesterday," he suddenly says.

You lowly chuckle, "When it was cheaper?"

The wind keeps blowing your way, sending your hair flying around and making it messy. Jamie attentively puts the stray hair away and tucks them behind your ears.

"Do you still want to break the rules?" You ask out of curiosity.

"If you want to," he answers.

He fixes the collar of his shirt and looks at you, "what about you?"

You crinkle your nose at him, conflicted. On one side, you want to kiss him and see if there's a spark between you and him but on the other side, it costs two Chanel handbags.

You rest your head on his shoulder, "I just don't think we should be selfish by spending money recklessly," you honestly answer.

"Yeah..." he agrees but the sigh he lets out at the end tells you otherwise.

YOU: Jamie sounds a little disappointed that I don't want to break the rules. I mean, don't hate the player, hate the game!

The make-up room is crowded with the girls cleansing their faces and doing their bedtime routine. You decide to take the last turn, lounging on Jamie's bed to make up for not sleeping with him tonight.

"Are you guys going to sleep together tonight?" Aly asks from the bed across the room.

Jamie turns his head with an eyebrow raised at you, asking you the same question.

"Yes, we are," you finally answer.

Jamie can't hide his triumphant smile and it looks adorable on him, you can't help but smile along.

YOU: I don't want to feel pressured to do it but I owe it to Jamie to at least try and see if this relationship is going somewhere.

It's understandable for them to be nosy, it's what the viewers need, a little drama, a little action but what they need are the juicy details.

Before anyone else gets nosy, you start getting ready for bed. Wipes clean your make-up and go to the bathroom to wash up, someone else is showering inside the stall.

It's a normal occurrence. Honestly, everyone else is just so calm about seeing each other's body at this point.

However, the glass wall is blurry so you don't have to worry about seeing someone's naked body inside. You head to the sink and mind your own business.

As you're brushing your teeth, the shower door opens and a hand reaches out for a towel hanging by the handle. In the mirror, you see Felix steps out of the shower and your eyes eventually meet through the reflection and you reflexively smile with a toothbrush tugged between your teeth.

"Hey," he greets.

It surprises you that the deep voice belongs to him, "Hi," you greet back.

He walks toward you and you scoot to the side knowing that he needs to use the sink.

"You don't mind, right?" He asks, taking his toothbrush out of his toiletry bag.

You shake your head, "not at all."

It's hard to not see his body when he stands close next to you. Everyone in here has a nice body but on the first impression, you see him as this thin and dainty guy.

Now, you've seen him up close, he has one of the best bodies in the house, his muscles are perfectly toned and it shows that he diligently worked on his body.

"How's your day?" He casually asks with the towel hanging low around his hips.

"Alright, I guess," you answer.

"You?" You ask back while washing your toothbrush under the running water.

He looks at you and smiles, "just got better, actually," he answers.

Felix is definitely flirting and you immediately fill your mouth with water before stupid things come out of it. You decide to quickly wrap it up before someone else enters the space even though you're doing nothing.

YOU: Felix and I are just talking. There's— [inhales] he's low-key flirting with me and I freaked out, there I said it.

Maeve is already on the bed when you enter the bedroom and so is Jamie with a space prepared on the bed for you.

It would be rude to say nothing to Maeve that you'll not be sleeping with her, so you come to her first.

"I'm sleeping with Jamie," you tell her.

She slyly grins at you, "Should I give you the sex talk?"

"No, thank you, mom!" You grab your pillow and walk to Jamie's bed still laughing.

Jamie's smile grows wider the closer you get to his bed, he opens his arms to welcome you.

"Come here, sweet thing!" He playfully says.

You hit him with your pillow before coming into his hug. As you settle on his bed, Felix walks past your bed and flashes you a smile, a little different from the one he gave you earlier.

You forget that he sleeps on the bed next to Jamie's and you don't know how it suddenly feels awkward to you.

"Be good, you two!" Cole warns with a piercing glare.

"Not going to break any rules. You can have my words," you assure him despite Jamie nuzzling his nose onto your shoulder as you speak.

YOU: At least, that's what I hope. Being in bed with Jamie and try not to break rules will certainly not going to be easy. Ugh!

Once the lights are out, Jamie spoons you from behind with his arms wrapped around you. Not going to lie but it feels nice to be with someone.

"You smell so good," he whispers into your ear.

You don't respond, afraid that it will only encourage him to do more.

"You're so soft," he says again with his hand splayed on your bare stomach.

"Night, Jamie," you put an end to the talk.

That doesn't stop his hand from cuddling you and nuzzling his nose in your neck.

"No goodnight kiss?" He asks.

You take his hand and kiss it as a substitute, earning a low laugh from him.

Jamie kisses you on the neck in return, "Night!"

YOU: It's getting a little hot in here [fanning your neck]

The first thing Cole does when he wakes up is ask everyone an important question.

"Did anyone break any rules last night?"

You shake your head because as much as it's been hard to refrain from touching Jamie, you didn't do anything but cuddle under the cover.

"I can promise you we've been good in here!" Jamie confidently states and puts his arm around you.

Aly as Maeve's new bedmate, points at Laura and Alex's bed, "I definitely heard noises coming from their bed," she snatches on them.

Alex may have a good poker face but you can't say the same with Laura, she's looking guilty but the kind that tells she's not sorry for doing it.

"You may as well spill the truth now," Daniel eggs in.

Laura nonchalantly shrugs as if she's not been acting selfishly when it's only about time that Lana announces how much money we've lost because of them.

YOU: I'm proud that Jamie and I managed to not break any rules last night. I hope that proves that we do have a real connection.

It's too late for you to walk out as Felix sees you coming into the bathroom.

You walk to the sink to grab your toiletry bag you forgot to take with you, "I can't believe our meet cute is in the bathroom," you say.

He laughs hearing your words while struggling to put sunblock on his back.

"Need help?"

He considers it for a moment then nods, "Yes!"

You take the tube of sunblock from him, pressing a big dollop of the cream on your hand and slowly lathering it on his honey skin. His skin is smooth and warm with muscles that make his back the perfect spot to lean on.

"So, you and Jamie, huh?" he suddenly asks, looking at you through the reflection in the mirror.

The question snaps you out of your daze. You're thankful that he can't see your face as you're busy making sure the sunblock is covering his back evenly.

"Yes," you shortly reply.

He hums while subtly nodding his head, "And what do you think?"

You play dumb but it's also because your hands wander to his lats and they're distracting, "of what?"

Felix leans forward with hands resting against the sink, "is it serious?"

You silently gulp air because his question only means that he has an interest in your relationship which also means that he has...

"We're still figuring each other out," you settle with a diplomatic answer for him.

You glide your hands back up to lather the sunblock down his shoulder blades.

"I see," he responds with a smile.

And not just a smile, a smile that tells he got the answer he wants.

You slide your hands down his arms and playfully squeeze his biceps, "there! Done!"

He takes the sunblock back from you and checks himself in the mirror, "thank you."

Felix raises his hands for a high-five with you, "Let's have a great day!"

You smile at him and return the high-five, "Let's do it!"

YOU: Maeve likes Felix and I'm obviously team hoes before bros. Always!

"Blue looks good on you!"

It's another day of Jamie's endeavors to kiss you, starting the conversation by complimenting your bikini. He joined you sunbathing by the pool in the afternoon, sharing a sun lounger.

"Thank you!" You reply with a smile with your eyes squinting under the bright sun.

His hand is squeezing your arm, "you got some muscles here," he says.

"I played volleyball in high school," you share.

Propping a hand under his head, he looks down at you, "I want to see you play volleyball."

You chuckle, "That was years ago. I forgot how to play."

"Must be looking sexy serving ball in tight shorts," he lowers his head into your neck.

You burst out laughing and slip your hand in his soft locks, "that sounds so wrong."

Not only that you're out in the open, it's rather dangerous with how close he is and his lips looking inviting as he plants it on your shoulder.

It's only right that you distract him by giving him a little taste but not too much, enough to make him crave more.

"Do it for me?" You ask with a bottle of sun spray in your head.

"I'd love to," he eagerly says.

Jamie sprays on parts of the body he wants to touch, all over your back as you lay on your stomach and down to your asscheek, excessively kneading on them.

You laugh at how he can't stop himself that you eventually have to turn over so he can continue, spraying your shoulders.

You take off the straps around your neck so he can spray your chest and sneaks his hand on the valley between your breasts.

"Yeah, get in there!" You playfully encourage him.

Jamie grins like a child who got caught taking a cookie out of the cookie jar. He then continues to spray on your abdomen and evenly rub them down your thighs next while glancing into your eyes once in a while.

To say that you don't enjoy teasing him would be a lie.

YOU: Jamie becomes more relentless by the day but am I wrong to not want to rule break? Isn't that the purpose of this retreat?

As the day turns to night, it's only about time until everyone got called to the cabana.

You feel sick listening to the sound of Lana's cone-shaped body chiming, especially with Laura and Alex acting so suspiciously.

Lana is a computer but she sounds not pleased as she greets everyone. Cut to the announcement, she informs that Laura and Alex did break the rules last night.

You glance at Cole who got speechless that he's just looking at Alex in disbelief.

"These rule breaks cost the group $18.000."

YOU: For three kisses? Really? Lana, please, be reasonable with the prices.

"That's not the only rule break they committed," Lana spills more truth.

This is what you fear the most, getting riled by the whole group for breaking the rules. Everyone looks at both Laura and Alex waiting for them to confess.

"I touched his willy under the cover," Laura confesses.

Everyone groans in unison.

You don't know how Laura is okay being so selfish and can keep a straight face, but that's probably why her make-up is super thick.

"This rule break costs the group a further $4.000."

"Why would you do that?" Maeve asks and she rarely gets this mad.

"It's not a big deal!" Laura nonchalantly responds.

"Yeah but not for $4.000!" Heidi snaps at her, as furious as everyone.

"Now the prize fund stands at $166.000."

YOU: I can use that money as a deposit for a house and here we are, spending it on kisses and a hand down a guy's trouser.

The night gets darker not only on the outside but inside the house as well.

Lana sends Laura and Alex to the suite to test if they're building a true connection but everyone is skeptical that they'll pass the test.

You sit on the bed with Jamie resting his head on your lap, brushing his hair to relax you now that you've lost a chunk of money.

"Alex is like the horniest people and Laura is the biggest teaser, it's a recipe for a disaster," Aly comments, lying on her stomach on the bed opposite yours.

"They will rule break once or twice at least," Jamie adds his opinion.

The night ends early but you see that Maeve and Felix haven't returned yet to their respective beds. You hope that things are going well with them.

You nuzzle your head into Jamie's chest and murmur, "We haven't broken any rules," you tell him.

"Yet," Jamie continues your words clasping your hand with his.

You look at him and smile as he looks back at you, "We've been good and I'm proud."

He foolishly smiles and opens his arms to invite you for a hug. You jump right into his embrace and those muscles on his body feel pillowy under you.

Jamie pulls the duvet to cover both of your bodies even though the lights aren't out yet. You squeal as he starts to glide his hands down your sides.

YOU: I appreciate Jamie for being so patient because I know, it was hard for me to not throw myself at him.

"We don't need another rule break tonight!"

Cole pulls the duvet down to reveal that the two of you are just tickling each other under the cover.

At the same time, Felix makes his way to his bed, seeing you straddling Jamie on the bed which sends you to get off of him immediately.

It's unclear why you do that but your eyes go straight to Maeve's bed, it's empty even when the lights are already out.

You nestle your head in Jamie's neck as he lightly touches up and down your arm and kisses your hand once in a while.

You plant a soft kiss on his neck and whisper, "Night."

He kisses you back on the head, "Goodnight!"

YOU: I start to believe that maybe Jamie and I do have a genuine connection [smiles]

Everyone is looking restless from the moment they woke up and looks in shambles once they gathered in the cabana, ready for that time of the day.

After a while, Laura and Alex are returning from the suite. You recognize the glow on Laura's face right away but you could be wrong.

God! You hope you're wrong and they didn't do anything selfish last night.

You're spacing out as Lana comes with her anxiety-inducing ping sounds and all you can think about is how much money Laura and Alex spent last night.

"They're looking suspicious," Aly whispers at you.

Indeed, they are, and looking very guilty as well. Everyone waits in anticipation as Lana takes her time to announce whether they pass the test or blow all the money in one night.

"I must tell the group that Laura and Alex did..."

You hold your breath for the worst outcome.

"Not..."

It's getting harder to breathe now.

"Break any rules!"

Everyone shoots up from their seats and congratulates the couple in turns. You got so far in life that you get to celebrate people for not having sex.

YOU: So they can keep it in their pants! I'm proud!

Lana has another announcement after everyone settled in from the celebration.

"To motivate everyone to grow genuine feelings of connection as opposed to lust, I've prepared gifts for all of you."

You take the box in front of you and open it to reveal a watch inside.

"When I observe two people forming genuine connections, they will be given a green light like this."

Everyone's watch chimes and turns green at the same time.

"While the lights are green, the rules do not apply for a limited amount of time."

Cole claps his hands together to get everyone's attention, "There's no more excuse for anyone to break any more rules!"

YOU: This [shows the watch] motivates me to build a connection with Jamie. Hope we get to be the first to get the green light.

After a very stressful morning that thankfully ends with a happy ending, you can have the room to breathe since the boys are out of the house to do a workshop at the beach.

The girls are hanging out in the bedroom and with the drama going on earlier, you forgot to ask Maeve why she went to bed late last night.

To get a little privacy, even though you can't get any with cameras placed in every crook and nook of the villa, you take her to the make-up room. You sit next to her while fixing your make-up in the mirror.

"Is everything okay?" You ask.

Maeve sits with both feet up on the chair and looks down at her nails, "not okay, honestly," she answers.

You stop looking at the mirror and turn your chair to face her, "why? What happened?"

Maeve hugs her folded legs and looks at you, a sad smile on her face.

"I just don't know what I'm doing here..."

You place your hand on her knee, "hey, don't say that!"

"I'm not making connections with anyone and I tried, but it's not working. I-I don't know why I'm here," she says with a heavy sigh at the end of the sentence.

It seems like things aren't going well between her and Felix, and Maeve is someone with low self-esteem, which makes her somewhat dejected that things didn't go well.

"You don't have to be a couple to make progress, you know," you comfort her and it's true, Cole is proof that he's fine not being in a pair and dedicates himself as an avid protector of the prize money instead.

"I'm not pretty. No one wants to be with me," she breaks into tears and buries her head in her hands.

You get up from the chair to hug her, "First of all, everyone here is pretty and it's not a beauty pageant, okay?" You comfort her while slightly bending down with your arms around her.

"It's not about look. It's about chemistry, attraction, and stuff," you awkwardly explain.

You have no talent in comforting someone but you try your best. After a moment, Maeve lifts her head and looks at you.

"No one is attracted to me," she says with her fingers carefully dabbing the corner of her eyes to avoid ruining her make-up.

You scoff and turn the chair to face her before sitting on it, "you are so beautiful, Maeve," you assure her with both hands holding hers.

Maeve puts down her feet and your clasped hands dropped onto her lap, "I know," she half-heartedly agrees.

"For you, I'll fly to Ireland and come see you, we'll get drunk and have so much fun," you cheer her up with nice thoughts while shaking her hands.

Maeve cracks a laugh and you can see that she starts to get hopeful again. She's a genuinely kind person which is not someone you expect to meet here, you think of her as a friend despite it happening because you both are in a reality show.

A crazy idea crosses your head, "you know what? We can be a couple and win the money," you tell her.

YOU: I'm bad at comforting people and the only thing I know how to comfort someone is through actions [slyly smiles]

She laughs at your wild suggestion that it takes her a while to reply to you, "I'd love that, yeah," she jokingly answers.

An even crazier idea crosses your head, "come here then," you tell her, pulling her close until your heads meet in the middle.

Maeve senses your intention but not doing anything to stop you, instead, she leans in first to kiss you.

You kiss her back as she softly brushes her lips on yours over and over again. She tastes so sweet and warm, she knows how to use her tongue and not overdo it, and overall, one hell of a good kisser.

You pull away first as the reality that someone might walk in on you dawns on you.

"Did we just break the rules?" Maeve asks while wiping her smeared lipstick.

"You'd better have a good poker face!" You warn her.

YOU: Goodness! Maeve is a good kisser and that kiss... I think that was the best $6.000 I ever spent. No regret at all.

The boys are back just in time for another party Lana is throwing tonight.

The theme is Saints and Sinners and there's a box of costumes for everyone to wear. You choose to be an angel with wings even though you've been behaving badly after breaking the rules earlier.

He sits you on his lap even though the sofa is spacy enough for another two persons but you feel safe since Alex and Laura are there, cuddling in the smaller sofa across from yours.

"So, what did you do in the workshop?" You ask Jamie.

He takes a deep breath and his chest heaving along with yours, "we learned how to be more open with our feelings."

You nod along and leer over at him, "And how did it go?"

Jamie rests his chin on your shoulder with a hand resting on your stomach, "Well, I'm never good at it but I think I did alright."

He doesn't sound so convincing but you appreciate the effort.

"You look beautiful, babe!" He compliments you along with a gentle squeeze on your thigh.

You're immune to sweet nothings like this but a compliment is a compliment. You smile and mutter, "Thank you!"

You slip your hand into the opening of his shirt, "I like your shirt," you compliment back with a seductive smile.

He sees your hand slide in further into his shirt, "should have let another button open."

Jamie keeps checking his watch hoping that the light turns green soon.

You doubt that a few compliments can do it and silently laugh at his fruitless effort.

YOU: I'll always be physically attracted to Jamie but I don't know. I can't tell if I doubt myself or him, or us, entirely [clicks tongue]

The time for doom is here.

You exchange nervous glances with Maeve knowing what we've done would damage the numbers on the prize fund. You doubt that it's what Laura felt when she broke the rules because what you're feeling is a sense of guilt but that's solely because you behaved selfishly, not for the kiss.

"Hours after receiving the gifts of my watches, a couple of you decide to break the rules by kissing," Lana announces.

Everyone's eyes land on Alex and Laura since they're the regular rulebreakers. Just know that they'll be surprised once they found out who did it.

"You know the routine. Just spill it!" Cole sounded so done at this point.

You hate to break his trust but you don't feel bad for breaking the rules, not when you have a good intention. Your heart is pounding for how much shit you'll get either from admitting it or don't, you choose the former.

"It was me," you blurt out with a hand raised.

Jamie snaps his head at you, eyes wide filled with confusion because he knows for damn sure you didn't kiss him or vice versa.

"I'm not going to name names who I did it with and why," you quickly add and it's the only right thing to do, you don't want to force Maeve to speak out unless she wanted to.

"I'm sorry," you apologize.

Jamie looks even more confused but his eyes are scanning the guys one by one even though it isn't any of them you kissed.

"I'm sorry, Cole," you apologize to him personally since he's the one who gets sensitive the most about the money.

Maeve raises her hand and decides to admit it as well, "she did it with me."

They let out a collective gasp, laughter, and sneaky eyes going on after. Jamie squeezes your shoulder but not saying anything to you.

"Another $6.000 has gone from the prize fund, leaving the group with $160.000," Lana furtherly informs.

Funny that you didn't about the money at all when you kiss Maeve. Probably because you know that you intend to rebuild Maeve's confidence, so she's not giving up on herself and continues her journey here.

However, when it comes to Jamie, you're still not sure if you want to spend $6.000 on a kiss with him.

The rule break doesn't seem to leave that much impression on everyone.

Maybe because they give you a pass because it's your first time breaking the rule and the night ends in peace or that's what you thought.

You're chatting with Aly in the firepit to avoid the crowded make-up room when suddenly Felix comes behind you. You didn't notice until Aly sends you a signal with her eyes.

"Can I talk to you?" He asks.

Aly gets the hint and decides to leave, "I'll excuse myself then."

You've spent a couple of times alone with him even though they only last for a few minutes, but this time is different, no one is around except for the filming crew lurking in the bushes or somewhere you're not aware of.

The sofa could fit a couple of dozen people but Felix decides to sit next to you.

"Hi," he sweetly greets.

"Hi, how are you?" You ask with a smile.

His legs are spreading wide and he has gaping holes in his jeans, exposing bits of his thighs that you found are surprisingly muscular.

"I'm good," he answers, doing the classic move of putting his arm on the headrest of the sofa, "how about you?"

Your body somehow responds by putting your leg over the other and leaning towards him, "Never been better."

Felix gets quiet but his eyes are deeply looking into your eyes as if he found something fascinating in them. A while later, he clears his throat as he slightly slouched on the sofa, legs spreading wider, sending the holes in his jeans to stretch and expose more of his skin.

"During the workshop, we were taught to open up about our feelings and I–" He pauses to scratch his small nose and continues with an uneasy glance at you, "I know what I want and I want to do it. I know I'll regret it if I don't."

"Okay," you respond while nodding along and at times, getting distracted by the holes in his jeans.

"I know you're with Jamie and I don't mean to break things between the two of you but I feel like... I need you to know that I like you."

Felix talks without a beat and with the intense stare he's giving you, you gulp air feeling nervous but in an exciting kind of way.

"I like you," he says again.

Your heart starts to race because you can feel how much he meant all of his words.

YOU: Oh my God! The hottest man in this retreat likes me?!

"You don't have to do anything about it," he casually says as if he didn't just put you in a predicament since you're with Jamie.

Felix retracts his hand and accidentally or not, brushes his hand on your shoulder. He gives you the faintest of physical contact but enough to send a shiver down your spine.

Still speechless by his sudden confession, but you know you should have said something to him to avoid him getting the wrong idea.

"Thank you for letting me know," you begin.

"You're very welcome!" He excitedly responds with a wide grin.

"But let me know if you want to do anything about it," he adds with a playful grin.

Something about him makes you warm inside, you can feel your cheeks heating, flustered with his eyes never straying away from yours even for a second.

The night is late and the fireplace is laying low, swaying with the gentle breeze coming from the sea, Felix's lips suddenly look so inviting, enticing you like a forbidden apple.

This is dangerous.

"Let's head inside," he says, thankfully being the one putting a brake on the imminent danger.

YOU: This is honestly what I seek with Jamie, that excitement, that sparks and it's a problem that I got it from someone else without any sort of physical contact whatsoever.

"So, Maeve, is she a good kisser?" Jamie asks as he sits with you on the bed.

Maeve sips water from her tumbler before answering, "The best!"

She takes another sip before talking again, "You're in for a treat, Jamie."

He glances at you with an impressed smile, "Too bad that I can't confirm that," he says.

That's his way to dig at you for what you did. You understand that he feels betrayed by what you did, you refuse to kiss him but easily kissed someone behind his back.

You put your hand across his chest and look at him, "Are you mad?"

"Nah," he coyly answers.

You bring your mouth close to his ear, "are you jealous?"

Jamie chuckles as your breath tickles his ear, "A bit, yeah."

You kiss his cheek and deliver your apology with a heartfelt whisper, "I'm sorry, baby."

YOU: I, of course, feel bad for not giving Jamie the heads up about the kiss I did with Maeve. He looks rather upset but I know I deserve it.

It's probably luck that follows you throughout the times you spent in the retreat.

Everyone forgot about your rulebreaking as Daniel decides to get a new bed partner. He used to sleep with Heidi but tonight, he decides to sleep with Aly.

You nudge Jamie who's sleeping with his head nuzzles in your neck to witness the drama happening in the room.

His mouth opens in surprise while you look at Heidi who's slumped down on the bed.

"You okay?" You mouth at her.

"No," she mouths back.

You turn to look at Jamie, "Oh my God!" You lowly gasp.

"I feel bad for Heidi," Jamie whispers.

"Me too," you say back behind the duvet at Jamie.

YOU: Let's say we never know what's going to happen next [shrugs]

The mood the next morning has been set to gloomy with the drama that happened last night.

The good news is there's no sign of anyone breaking any rules and the bad news is that Jamie seems to not moving on from your kiss with Maeve yet.

Jamie is usually chipper whenever he's with you, except for today, he seems distant even though you're working out together by the beach.

"Tighten your glutes," he instructed.

You play dumb since that's the most successful way to win a guy's heart, "tighten my what?"

Jamie chuckles and enthusiastically shows you the parts of your body you need to work on, the back of your thighs and legs. His hands don't skip the chance to rub over the curve of your ass.

"Can you feel it?" He asks as he guides you to do a proper squat by standing right behind you.

You intentionally nudge his crotch with your ass, "oh yeah, I can feel it," you answer with giggles.

By working out, you hope that it would help to release tension between you and Jamie, it worked but in the process, you're getting that tingling down there with his hands constantly touching you.

You collapse onto the yoga mat from doing a plank and groan, "Ugh... I'm so horny."

Jamie laughs as he helps you get up from the mat.

YOU: I realized now that maybe Jamie needs validation, he needs more than just words from me. Maybe I have to do something about it [raises an eyebrow]

Before you can set a plan, Lana calls everyone to the cabana.

Not sure if anyone breaks any rules but you feel sick in the stomach whenever you sit down and face her cone-shaped body.

Cole is getting ready to put his laser eyes on anyone who breaks the rules.

"No one break any rules last night," Lana announces.

Everyone seems to be letting out a sigh of relief and you feel guilty just from thinking about doing a rule break later for Jamie.

"With the couples seeming to form deeper bonds, it's time to establish how committed to each other you really are," Lana states.

Couples? You are positive you and Jamie are included in it.

"By sending some of you on dates..." Lana continues.

YOU: The question is... Who's going on a date? I would love to go on a date with Jamie.

Now everyone starts to hold their breath again with Lana dragging each piece of information just to torture all of you.

"With new arrivals," Lana finally finishes.

This is not a good time for Lana to intervene, not when you plan on taking things further with Jamie. Also, new arrivals mean that they're not adapted to the rules yet, they'll be uncontrollable, horny babies like... well, everyone here a week ago.

"The first arrival is... Mia," Lana announces.

The guys snickered in joy, excited even just from hearing the girl's name.

"I have given her a choice of dating one of the boys currently in couples."

Your mouth hangs open in surprise, you're wrong to underestimate Lana's power and that she owns this game, she's the mastermind.

"She has selected..."

YOU: I hate to think about it but I have an inkling that this Mia girl is going to choose Jamie [leans back on the sofa]

"... Jamie."

The timing is impeccable.

Things are going well between you and Jamie, then Lana, being the girl boss she is, decides to ruin all of that.

You look at Jamie and he looks slightly pleased that he got chosen.

You're spacing out the rest of the time Lana announces another arrival, a boy who chose Laura to be his date.

It's unclear whether you're jealous about him going on another date or you regret holding yourself back from him all these times.

Jamie rubs his hand up and down your arm, briefly kisses your cheek, then says, "You have nothing to worry about."

How come you trust his words when you've witnessed all these bed hoppings and jumping ships happened overnight?

YOU: What Jamie said only makes me even more worried. Lana said it's a test so this Mia girl must be sexy, and speaks three languages or something. You know, like a girl version of Alex.

Maeve is helping you style your hair for tonight.

"How do you feel about Jamie going on a date with someone?" She asks.

You shrug and sigh, sending the powder you're holding flying around your face.

"I just hope she's ugly," you jokingly answer.

"Hate to break the news but I think she's hot and a potential rulebreaker," Maeve decides to pour salt on your wound instead of soothing it.

"It's not that I don't care but I decide not to care," you explain.

You finish your make-up with a setting spray and check yourself again in the mirror, "but you know, deep down, I'm scared, shitless," you admit.

It's getting more nerve-wracking waiting for Jamie to come back from his date. Maeve keeps you occupied with happy thoughts, telling you fun things you can do in Ireland with her.

The other girls low-key comfort you by complimenting your looks. It's a nice gesture except that no one died and you're not in mourning, you just want this to get over with.

Laura is the first one to come back, guiding the new arrival by linking her arm with his.

She introduces Killian around, an Irish man who's just the perfect match for Maeve.

Killian is a great distraction, his accent is attractive and so is his smile. You keep nudging Maeve's elbow to send her hints.

Maeve replies by elbowing your side and you thought she was being playful, then turn your head around to see Jamie has came back from his date.

"Oh shit. She's hot!" Aly exclaims.

You bite your tongue and put your lips together, not wanting to lose your calm easily. There are only two possibilities, Jamie stays with you, or not.

As Jamie pulls you to the make-up room, you know it's time for him to decide.

"How was the date?" You ask with a smile.

"It was nice. We had champagne and fruits and cheeses," he gives you an answer that you don't expect.

You silently gulp air and keep on putting on a smile for him, "Sounds lovely!"

The moment passed in silence is deafening and you need to burst it. You clear your throat and hold the hand on his lap.

"So... are you here to tell me I was right for not worrying you?" You joke.

Jamie awkwardly laughs at your question and that you're right for worrying him. A part of you is in denial that you're not chosen but another part of you decides to shut him out right here, right now.

"I want to tell you that Mia and I... I think we have something going on between us and I want to get to know her more," he slowly explains.

This heart is fickle, you decided not to care but you feel a sting in your chest when he told you that.

"You're saying you chose her?" You ask for confirmation.

Jamie takes your other hand, afraid that you run away before he can explain.

"No, I'm staying with you and openly telling you that at the same time, I want to get to know Mia," he refuses your words when it's exactly what he wants.

Other girls would give him the chance but not with you, if Jamie chose her then he should stay with her. There's no use for you and him to stay together if he wants to get to know someone that isn't you.

"Jamie you can't do that. You either stay with me or be with her, you have to choose!" You insist on him settling on a decision.

YOU: Apparently, Jamie wants to have his cake and eat it too [shakes head]

You get it that Jamie is conflicted because he still likes you but the other girl offers him something that you don't give to him.

"I like you. I still want to be with you," Jamie persists.

His words are not aligned with his action. You shake your head and put his hands away, "it sounds like you're asking me to wait for you while you're getting it on with someone else."

That seems to put the nail in the coffin that he got speechless. The disappointment got to you that you and if you stayed longer, you're afraid you would say something you didn't mean to him.

"You've made your choice, Jamie," you tell him.

YOU: To say that I'm disappointed is an understatement. I'm livid, I'm... I was planning to take things further but yeah... [brushes hair to the back] Mia happens.

Can't believe that you'll be the one serving drama tonight.

You stall in the make-up room, not wanting to get to the bedroom yet. You're drying your hair after a shower and sitting there for a minute, just taking everything in and trying to let it go.

Taking a deep breath, you keep a straight face as you push the door into the bedroom and have no choice but to share a bed with Heidi since Maeve is sharing the bed with Killian.

"You alright, babe?" She quietly asks.

You hold your forehead and slump down on the bed, "it's shitty."

She gently squeezes your elbow, "yeah."

You lay down on the bed and avoid the eyes looking back and forth between you and Jamie. You may decide not to care but seeing him sleeping with another girl right in front of your eyes, hurts.

You cover your eyes with your hand and mumble, "I just want to get this day over with."

YOU: Jamie has decided so he has to live with that decision. Good luck, I guess.

If it weren't for her, Jamie would have stayed with you and you wouldn't be waking up to Heidi lowly snoring next to you.

Mia might have seduced him but it wouldn't happen if Jamie remained faithful so you decide to blame him, not her.

This is probably what Maeve felt that day when she cried, defeated, and dejected.

But Jamie has to try harder if he wants to see you cry.

"How are you feeling, sexy?" Maeve asks as she waddles in the swimming pool.

You sit on the edge with your feet dipped in the sun-warm water, "I don't know, really," you shrug.

She holds onto your leg, clinging to it to stay afloat, "You're better than her, trust me, she's not that attractive if you looked at her long enough."

You know that she's not saying that out of spite, she said all that to make you feel better.

"Saying unkind things about her doesn't make me better, Maeve," you tell her with a glare.

"I'm sorry but it's true," she says with a subtle shrug.

YOU: Jamie and I [sighs] We hugged, we cuddled, we slept in one bed together. I don't want to care but the truth is... I care.

The day drags on and you're more than happy to get to your bed except that you're not ready to see Jamie and Mia cuddling on the bed you used to sleep on.

You're hanging out with Maeve in the make-up room while she's braiding your hair to pass the time.

"We can sleep together. I'll just tell Killian—"

"And risks Heidi stealing him from you?" You cut her off with a joke.

Maeve laughs as she tied the end of your hair with an elastic band and fixes the loose hair on the back of your head.

"Enough about me. How about you and Killian?"

Maeve plops down on the chair next to you and takes a hairbrush from the table, slowly combing the end of her hair.

"We chatted a lot but not sure if we have that connection," she answers.

"But don't worry, we're getting along just fine," she assures you in response to your concerned expression.

"Is it perhaps because you haven't moved on from Felix?"

Asking her that is like walking on eggshells and you're doing it carefully. Mostly because Felix confessed that he likes you that making it seems that way to you.

"Oh come on! I've moved past that," she answers while twirling her hair around her fingers.

You consider telling her about Felix's confession that night but it comes to no use, the retreat has come halfway to finish and you're not sure if Felix still likes you.

It's close to lights out and you step into the bedroom with Maeve.

Heidi is already taking half of the bed with her long legs that you have to scoot close to the edge to lie down.

"Goodnight, everyone!" Aly says to everyone in the room and getting sleepy mumbles in return.

YOU: When I think about it, I'm seeing Lana more than my therapist [uneasy smiles]

This is not how you want to start the day.

You don't want to hear what Jamie and Mia did or how they spent $20.000 last night. He probably has pent-up tension and finally got to release it with her.

"You got the watches, man!" Cole is coming at him.

You sit back and watch it from the end of the sofa on how Jamie is trying to explain himself.

"I know you won't believe me but Mia and I, we have a connection," he explains.

"Why not act right and get rewarded?" Cole is jabbing him with words.

"You won't understand," Jamie says with a defeated sigh.

YOU: Maybe that's why I doubted Jamie. I can see it now, the bright side [smirks]

Nothing says a fresh start than doing yoga with Heidi.

Apparently, she is a licensed instructor and you feel a whole lot better after stretching your body to the limit.

You share the shower with Maeve to cut the time and get ready to dress up.

As you're applying your lipstick, Lana chimes in and makes you jolt in your seat.

Maeve's mouth drops open and she stops curling her hair altogether.

"Hello, ladies!"

"Hi, Lana," you nervously answer and push your chair away from the table.

Then she calls your name and you almost choke on air.

"Y-yes?"

"I'm offering the chance to go on a date with Felix " Lana informs out of the blue.

"Me?" You ask in disbelief.

"Would you like to attend?" Lana asks.

You turn to look at Maeve to remind yourself to be a good friend and a good friend avoid hurting her friend's feelings.

"Shouldn't we make them wait for at least 48 hours for an answer, Lana?" You playfully respond.

Maeve kicks your feet under the table, "what are you doing? Say yes!"

"Then how about you?" You blabber, not expecting that she gives you the blessing to go on a date with her former crush.

"What about me?" She asks in pure confusion.

"Don't you like him?"

Maeve excessively sighs, "I told you I've moved on!"

She kicks your feet again, "Hurry! Say yes!"

You turn to look at Lana in her mixed purple-hued lights and hesitate to say yes. Not only it means you have to start it all over again, but also letting yourself open for another heartbreak.

"Would you like to attend?" Lana asks once again.

YOU: I'm not sure if I'm ready to try and restart [sighs]

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jinkiezzsstuff · 11 months ago

Text

Hate That I Love You

adam x insecure!tsundere(ithink) GNreader

Summary: You’ve been Lutes friend for a long while, and occasionally you ran into Adam; after finding out about the extermination thanks to him, you become a three party group. Except you can’t accept liking Adam, him being obnoxious and egotistical, you pretend you hate him. That blows up in your face.

Warnings: Suggestive, swearing, angst ish, hurt/comfort i think, insecurities around strength (mental and/or physical), implied but never confirmed virgin reader, readers looks get insulted nothing intense nor specific, descriptive panic attack/fainting, reader throws an object at adam’s head, NO YN, GN, No alluding to or mention of bodytype/hairtype/skin colour. oh possibly OOC adam idk, not proofread so sorry luvs, I think that’s it if not let me know! enjoy :3

Word count: 2K

Your index finger sat atop the straw sitting in your drink, moving it around the glass as you mindlessly listened as Adam ranted to you and Lute, mostly Lute, about Charlie Morningstar. You weren’t an exorcist- no, you actually didn’t know about the exterminations at all…up until recently. Thanks to one of Adam’s childish outbursts, you had a long night with Lute explaining the whole situation to you. Now you were sworn to secrecy, and conversations of the madness that the extermination were and everything they came with, AKA Charlie.

Adam wasn’t ever your buddy, he was just someone who shamelessly attached himself to Lute's hip; but you put up with it because of your good friendship with Lute. Now, he’s somehow weaselled his way into believing you were part of this weird “team” purely based off of association.

“I mean who does this long horned, pointy teeth, pussy mucher think she is?!” Adam screamed slamming his hands against the table, you rolled your eyes at him and his stupid antics. “You’re one to talk,” You replied, his eyes snapping toward you. “You’ve got both horns and teeth. Why don’t you take that funky band mask off anyways?”

Scoffing he rolled his neck side to side. “Because this is my job, my persona, how’re people gonna recognize me without it!? Duh, dumb bitch.” Muttering the insult quickly, he leaned his cheek on his palm and went back to sucking his drink.

“With all due respect sir, this is really bad news, we can’t let Charlie persuade Sera.” Lute piped up, her mask discarded showing the genuine emotion on her face. Sometimes you couldn’t tell if he was a friend, someone she was in love with, an annoying brother-like figure, or just her lazy ass boss. Maybe all of the above.

Which is probably one of the reasons you kept your tiny little crush on Adam to yourself. He was cruel to you anyways, always comparing you to someone faster, funnier, stronger, hotter at least that’s what you told yourself. Instead you chose to be more of a bitch back, acting as disgusted and disinterested as you could, especially when Lute was around as she could sniff out a lie like some psychic canine.

“Yeah, duh Lute i fucking know that. You think I've been jerking off this whole time! No, eyes, ears focused, I haven't cum in days.” He whined, throwing his head back. Lute only scoffed glancing over at you slumped back in your seat barely sipping your drink, eyes casted downward. “You don’t have to be here for this kind of talk,” Lute started saying, her hand inching across the table to yours, but she was stopped by Adam once more leaning forward, gloved palms slapping against the table.

“The fuck are you saying Lute!? We get another fucker in this circle and you wanna cast her out. Un-fucking-believeable. It’s like you want Charlie to win.” Throwing a napkin at Adam, Lute slid her hand away from you. “They’re not even an exorcist Adam, you’re the fuck head who got them in on exterminations!”

“No i didn’t, they walked in on a private conversation.” Eyebrows knitted together you lurched forward, anger fueling you. “Oh piss off Adam, how many times are we gonna go over this stupid situation! I’m not your fucking friend, i’m not ‘in’ on it, i’m here for Lute and you won’t fucking leave!”

Adam had a bored expression on his face while you ranted, unfazed by anything you’d said. Lute however bit her lip clasping her hands together. In a fight between her boss slash friend, and her friend, she didn’t know what to do. “You always have your nose up in Lute's business, it’s so annoying. Lute’s my man, okay she works for me! Guess who comes first in this business chica? Not you.” Adam mocked sticking his tongue out at you.

Standing you picked up your cup whipping it at Adam’s head, he dodge it easily, but your emotionally fueled violence made you quickly regretful as both Adam’s and Lutes eyes looked at you questioningly. You’d never really lost your shit before, and this wasn’t the worst Adam has said, so they were a little confused at your outburst, yourself included.

“Listen, Adam, I’m-“ Before you could finish Adam keeled over, laughing maniacally as you watched. After a few short laughter filled moments, Adam straightened, elbows on the table, hands hammocking his chin as he smiled up at you.

“Got some bite in you for sure huh babe, ha! I’m not surprised, honestly when i saw you i was like ‘this bitch has a face made for hell’, you probably got up here cause you were unfuckable so, like, virgin. Oh! Oh! That makes so much fucking sense dude! Ha! Bummer, I could smell the weak loser on ya, didn’t I tell ya danger tits?” Adam questioned head turned toward Lute after his animated, and very condescending speech.

Lute only looked down, not responding. Meanwhile you were horrified, you’d always felt a little less than Lute, after all she carried out holy duties, ones that you hadn’t fully known up until recently, so hearing Adam say the same things you thought of yourself, shattered you. Your face felt hot as tears gathered on the waterline of your eyes. You didn’t belong here, you said it for the longest time everyone here was mindless optimist zombies, Lute was your only lifeline, and for a few months you suppose-Adam.

You never hated him, but it’s clear he’s only fond of Lute. You’re the intruder, you’re the odd one. Clenching your fists you didn’t even bother with a come back, you slid out from your table booking it to the door. Tears unwillingly slid down your cheeks, your chest heaving as your throat closed silencing whatever weep dared to exit your throat.

You could hear Lute calling after you but you genuinely didn’t want to be followed by her, you were embarrassed; the last thing you wanted was the strong exorcist coming to witness you crumble. Throwing the door to the building open your wings sprung out on reflex, and after a few quick steps you took off. You couldn’t quite see, or breathe for that matter. Your mind lagged behind you, replaying the moments in your head that matched up to Adam’s insults.

You blinked rapidly as you attempted to focus on the clouds beneath you and breeze around you, but you couldn’t. You choked once more, your stomach convulsing inward causing you to gasp, a sob violently escaping you as you rocketed toward whatever surface you could find. Suddenly you hit something solid, stunning your flight and causing you to spin down, plummeting. As you fell, the breeze stabbed you as you cut into it, your wings sagging and loosely flailing above you, it felt so calm and freeing you didn’t feel the will to stop.

By the grace of god, however, you were caught and roughly smacked against the chest of someone, their arms clutching you tightly. You barely heard a ‘gotcha’ before your vision tunnelled, stomach flipped and you lost consciousness.

——

Waking slowly, your eyes stung the moment they opened, nearly watering at the blinding white that invaded them. Willing yourself to rise, you lazily scanned the room you laid in. A living room, coloured with yellows, creams and whites, it was, in all honesty, way too much. A large portrait of a man with a woman, meticulously scrapped out, hung above the fireplace. You’d never seen this man ever before, and the woman was too scratched out to get any idea on who it was. Suppose these people never existed as it was a painting, but there was something about the man that captivated you so deeply.

“Look who finally rose, sleeping bitchy.” You immediately felt sick, turning your head unsurprised to see Adam standing there smugly. You frowned deeply, it felt nearly impossible to twist your mouth in such a way, but there was no hiding your distaste in seeing the angel. “Why am I here, Adam.” You say scaldingly, eyes closed attempting to shield yourself from whatever foul look took over his face. “Well after your little shit show, a little over dramatic by the way, Lute left to find you, and I went for a fly. Then suddenly minding my own business I see you tryna play asteroid! Then when I caught you, your dumbass went out.”

Sighing loudly you pulled your hand down your face. “Please, admit Lute put you up to it.” Slamming a glass of water down on the table along with a platter of fruit, including oranges, pomegranates and mangos, Adam grunted moving his hand to sit on his hips. “The fuck she did, she’s not getting the praise for this one.” You looked up at him and then down at the fruit and drink on the side table just to your right, you nodded at it. “What’s this?”

You barely whispered out. Blowing air out threw his lips effectively raspberryingring the air, he shrugged. “Stuff for you, duh, you’re like sick or something right?” You nearly smiled at that, you’d never had Adam have that reaction. Quite the array of fruit as well, carefully you picked up a few pieces of orange, as well as mango that had a toothpick sticking up from them you munched down. You hummed, watching like a hawk as Adam walked across from you and sat on the other couch.

“How long was i out?” You questioned after swallowing, gulping down some water feeling the soothing sensation on your raw throat. “Maybe thirty minutes, not long. I texted Lute, I told her you were with me, safe.” That made you pause, you gazed up at him from the bowl of pomegranates you started digging into. “What? Why didn’t she come?” Adam huffed, throwing his hands behind his head and leaned back. “Because I told her not to.” Your mouth fell open eyes wide.

“Why thee holy fuck, would you tell her not to come?” Sitting up straighter you swung your legs over the side, sitting properly instead of lounging. Adam wouldn’t meet your gaze drifting off to the left and right. “Fucking… fuck!” He exclaimed almost in what sounded like exhaustion. Watching him closely, you waited as he seemed to have an inner debate with himself. Then swiftly he gripped his face and ripped off his mask.

The face you were met with was like a punch in the gut, yeah he could be compared to men you’ve seen in your lifetime probably at a gas station or cheap bar, but it was Adam. The man you’ve been trying so hard to hate, getting into cussing battles, throwing insults at each other that rolled off the back, occasionally praising each other's insults, forcing yourself to loathe him when you both kinda knew it wasn’t and now it was real. You got to look in his gold eyes, the dark thick lashes accentuating the uniqueness of his eye colour, the chin hair that crawled just under his chin -which you never expected him to have-, his tousled brown hair, thick eyebrows one eyebrow pierced - also a shock to you-.

He looked like the asshole he was, and it made you fucking sick. Trying so hard to hate him had come to this? Him unmasking himself after saving you? Cruel, you wanted to hate him, get over him not know that all he said about him being the hottest, the dickmaster, pussypounder-whatever, was probably true, that he’s hot. You were embarrassed to feel the nasty hum of jealousy claw at you when you could see the woman in the painting in your peripheral, that was obviously him, with some woman. He was wanted, and taken before.

Flicking his tongue over his lips you caught a glimpse of a tongue piercing because of course the pretty boy would get whatever he wanted without worrying about rules. He shuffled nervously biting his lip as you eyed him shamelessly, which to him was judgemental, his nerves suddenly making him feel sweaty. “Why?” You ask breathily, you were too enchanted to care how he perceived that however. His eyes properly met yours, your legs crossed subconsciously at the zap you felt just by a look.

“Youre fucking dumb you know that? You think I hang with Lute when you’re around because Lute’s there?!” Adam stood after the exclamation, his eyes shooting around the room, hands flying to his hair. “I can’t fucking do this a third time! Fuck!” Tossing a vase across the room you watched unfazed by the sudden explosion, after all this was your thing too.

“I only go round Lute like that because you’re there dumbass, i tried easing up on you; just like Lute said! But you, oh noooo little bitch, just had to be so fucking bratty.” Standing over you sneering, you made no attempts to move, not genuinely scared of his anger but instead, perhaps, a little aroused. You in a way understood where his frustrations came from anyway, you in a sense felt the same way. Might be why you lost it earlier, the yearning had gotten too real, and he seemed so focused on Charlie.

“I am so disgustingly attracted to you, not even in a sex way! And I know how to deal with that a lot better.” Swinging his hand out sassily, he smirked to himself. Plopping next to you he rested his cheek on his hand, elbows rested on his legs. Plucking an orange from the table you watched him eat it, juice moistening his lips. “You think i’d peel fruit, save, house and give water to some broad I genuinely hated? No, stupid.”

Laughing dryly, you looked up away from Adam’s intense gaze. You smiled, eyes falling from the ceiling to your lap. “God i fucking hate you,” Adam’s face looked horrified, opening his mouth to speak, you stopped him grabbing his cheeks and pulling into a searing hot kiss. Your lips crashed against each others’ lazily but passionately, opened mouthed and slightly sloppy. It was slow however, a kiss that wasn’t just a kiss, neither of you wanted to haste past such a moment, such emotion. Adam’s arms wrapped around your hips nudging you forward, understanding the message you moved in closer, your body’s pressing against each other as much as you could from the seated position on the couch.

You dug your fingers into his hair, brainlessly playing with different strands as your tongues slid along one another’s without care, tasting the orange he just ate presently on his lips and to tongue. It felt heavenly being up against him, Adam smelt so good, he was so warm and you could feel how badly he wanted this. His body jittered, his hands gripping you like you’d disappear if he loosened. Pulling away and looking at Adam, he made no effort to move eyes still closed like trying to etched this memory in his mind. You hummed lovingly, brushing hair away from his forehead. “You’re a dumb bitch.” He whispered raspily, opening his eyes, although not by much as they lidded with lust.

You smirked at him brushing your thumb against his bottom lip. “I know. You too.”

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel adam #adam hazbin hotel #adam x reader #adam hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel adam x reader #hazbin hotel imagine #hazbin hotel oneshots #hazbin hotel fluff

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sister-lucifer · 1 year ago

Text

A Bullet in the Chamber

Proxies (Hoodie, Masky, Toby) x Gender Neutral Reader

Genre: Horror/Dark Angst

Summary: They want you to prove your love, to prove that you truly believe you’re meant to be together…with the help of Tim’s revolver, of course.

Content/Warnings: God, where do I start…obviously massive use of a gun, they play russian roulette, descriptions of gore, the proxies are super manipulative and emotionally abusive to reader, just a super obsessive not healthy relationship, this is NOT a feel good fic, it’s implied reader is being held captive

Like my writing? I take requests! NSFW or SFW for any fandoms in my bio (request rules + masterlist in pinned post)!

Also, please reblog! it’s free, takes two seconds, and really helps me out

Feedback is encouraged and appreciated:)

Not fully proofread! Let me know if you see any errors!

“We just wanna…play a little game with you, that’s all,” Tim drawls, his voice deep and lazy as he looks at you from behind his mask.

You’re nervous suddenly. Unbearably nervous. A cold chill runs throughout your body and makes your stomach convulse in an agonizing manner, and you don’t know if you’re going to vomit or pass out first. You don’t know why. He’s only just started speaking. Maybe it’s the way he drew out the last part of that sentence, or the way he immediately tried to soothe you before you’ve even fully understood what’s going on, or just that look in his eyes that says ‘I want to fucking gut you.’

There’s a reason you learned to keep your guard up around these three.

Suddenly the little circle you’re all sitting in on the floor feels much, much tighter than is comfortable, and it doesn’t help that Toby slides in closer, bumping your shoulder with his and flashing you a knowing smirk. What exactly he knows, though, is a horrific enigma to you.

Brian is on your other side, and although he doesn’t move, for a split second he glances at you out of the corner of his eye before his gaze returns to Tim. He’s managing to hold a straight face, but you can see the corners of his mouth just barely twitching as he internally fights to keep the emotion bubbling beneath the surface at bay.

There’s silence for a few moments, you’re not sure how long, but you don’t realize they’re waiting for you to speak until Toby nudges you.

“I, uh…what, um— what kind of game…?” You stammer, immediately regretting your question despite the curiosity that’s gnawing at you like a starving animal. You shudder when Toby giggles, clearly trying to stifle the sound as he bumps your shoulder again.

Tim thinks over his answer for a moment, scratching at his stubble in a manner that is far too casual. You think he’s going to speak, you’re expecting it, but he doesn’t say anything at first beyond a tired sounding sigh. Your eyes are locked onto his hand as it reaches behind him, and when it emerges once more it’s holding onto the grip of Tim’s revolver.

“There’s one bullet in the chamber.”

The world is spinning suddenly as you watch him place the weapon on the ground, and the sound of it sliding across the floor to you makes you sick. You bite back a gag as it slows to a stop in front of you. Your mouth hangs open uselessly as you struggle for words, desperate to pull out some sort of protest to what you know he wants but no sound comes.

They watch you grapple with yourself for a few moments before Brian places a hand on your knee. It’s supposed to be a comforting gesture, and normally it would be, but now it feels like a threat.

“Hey, don’t freak out so soon,” He says, lips curled into a subtle smirk, “We did this all the time when we were younger, it’s practically a rite of passage.”

Unsurprisingly, this does little to quell your fears. You’re shaking now, unable to wrap your mind around how they could be acting so nonchalant about putting your lives on the line like this.

“Listen,” Tim huffs, “I’m gonna be straight with ya, kid. We know how you’ve been feeling recently.”

That hardly narrows it down. You’ve been feeling a lot of things recently, none of it good and all of it confusing. That’s just the sort of conflict born from this kind of captivity. You shrug, unsure what to say.

“We know you w-wanna leave,” Toby clarifies, “I saw you staring out t-the window the other day…you just s-sat there for hours.”

That…made you feel a bit guilty. You shouldn’t, but you do. You could’ve at least made it less obvious.

“We trust you, hon,” Brian adds with a nod, “But we also think we could all use a little…what did you call it?”

He turns to Tim, who yawns before answering.

“…Group bonding.”

You shudder at the phrase. Disgusting.

“I…I don’t think this is the best way to…t-to do that,” You murmur, but your words hold no weight when you can’t even look them in the eyes. You’d never take the risk of making any sort of real fuss anyways.

Tim shrugs, seeming to consider your words.

“How would you do it, then?”

You…don’t have an answer for that. Why don’t you have an answer for that?

“I-I don’t know, I mean…can’t we just have awkward group sex like other, uh…groups, or whatever?” You ask, hesitating to call your dynamic any sort of relationship.

You make sure to tack on a nervous laugh at the end to make it seem lighthearted, but no one is amused. Toby giggles, but he’s laughing at you, and it’s painfully obvious.

“Don’t stress about it,” Tim says, “Just think of it as a…a test, you know?”

He sighs when you shake your head no.

“Ya know, like…a way of proving yourself. I mean, you trust us, right?”

You hesitate to answer that, but nod quickly when Tim narrows his eyes at you.

“Good. Well, think of it this way: if we all survive this, it’s a sign that we’re…meant to be together.”

“There has to be a better way—“ You blurt out before you can stop yourself, and Brian instantly takes to calming you.

He wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you into his side. His other hand comes up to your face, holding your head against his shoulder.

“Calm down, baby,” He says softly, “Don’t jump ship so fast. I told you, we’ve all done this before. We’ll even go first to show you there’s nothing to be afraid of, alright?”

He’s not really giving you a choice.

You nod.

Maybe you’ll be able to just get this over with. If you sit here for much longer, you’re gonna be sick.

Toby reaches out to grab the gun first. That doesn’t surprise you at all. He’s never been one for forethought, or common sense in general. One day his hubris will get him killed, you think, but for once you’re hoping it won’t be today.

Not today.

Not here.

Not right in front of you.

Brian doesn’t let you go, continuing to hold you against him as Toby makes a show of spinning the chamber, letting it run until it stops on its own. He giggles with deranged amusement as he presses the end of the barrel to the bottom of his chin, looking back at Tim with a crooked grin.

There’s silent for a few moments, and you can’t look away from him until you follow his gaze to Tim, who is staring back with furrowed brows.

He’s still for a beat, and then he nods.

A signal.

Go.

You have a split second to process Toby preparing to pull the trigger before you bury your face in Brian’s hoodie and he, in turn, covers your face with his hand and squeezes you tight. It’s hardly comforting, but it’s better than nothing.

The soft click of the trigger seems to echo endlessly in the silence that follows.

Silence.

You quickly look back up and are immediately met with Toby’s hazel eyes looking back at you, their corners crinkled with the wide smile that’s spread across his pale face.

“Lookie there,” He drawls with a laugh, “This h-handsome face is still in tact.”

“Hardly the better outcome,” Tim mutters with a roll of his eyes.

This prompts Toby to slide the gun to him next, crossing his arms in feigned hurt.

“You go n-next then, wise guy. If you blow y-your brains out, at least we’ll know you h-had one.”

“Shut up,” Tim hisses back as he, too, brings his hand up to spin the chamber of the revolver. You’re still trying to catch your breath. You didn’t think they’d be so eager.

You’re gripping onto Brian’s hoodie so tightly your knuckles burn as you watch Tim press the barrel of the gun to his jaw, angling it upwards toward the dome of his skull.

He’s not nearly as giddy as Toby. He’s straight faced and silent, which isn’t odd, but something in his eyes is darker than you ever remember it being. You can only see his eyes with his mask on, yet you know his expression exactly. He’s staring right at you, and you’re imagining his brains dashed against the wall behind him, his face and any identifying features that once made him human reduced to a splatter of viscera that barely resembles the pieces of a person.

And when it’s all over, you think, you’ll surely be the one left to clean the mess of what used to be Tim. You’ll be left to scrub the red stains from the floorboards while the others continue on as if nothing has happened, and suddenly you can’t breathe.

The world stills as once more the trigger is pulled with a click.

Then relief hits you like a shockwave when that click is followed by silence.

Silence.

Your lungs fill faster than you were ready for, and you cough and sputter as your chest heaves with newfound breath. Brian rubs your shoulder gently, his other hand reaching out to grab the revolver as Tim slides it to him. The gun is exchanged without a word, only piercing eye contact as Brian lifts the weapon and spins the chamber, just as his companions had done before him.

It seems so natural for all of them. In the half a second it takes for Brian to lift the gun you wonder how many times they’ve done this, if you’re the first person to witness this ritual, and if not, what happened to those who came before you.

You don’t find any hope of getting answers, though, as you watch Brian press the barrel to the side of his head. He gives you a squeeze, and you can’t tell if he’s assuring you or saying goodbye just in case.

You still haven’t released his hoodie despite the throbbing pain in your fingers. You’re barely a thread away from tearing out a patch, but you can’t let go. You don’t look at him this time, unable to pull your head away from where it rests on his shoulder. You wrap your arms around him and squeeze like you’re trying to crush him, but he only lets out a breathy chuckle and ruffles your hair in response as if he’s amused by your terror. You’re a scared kid to him, a foolish little child running from an imaginary monster despite the very real threat.

You can hear his hoodie shifting as he adjusts the position of the gun. You can hear the slight scratching against his hair as the barrel moves against his head. You can hear him suck in a quick breath as he readies himself to pull the trigger.

You hear the click.

And then silence.

Silence.

You’ve never been so grateful for silence.

You nearly jump out of your skin when Toby claps and laughs loudly, practically howling with wildly misplaced celebration. He shakes you in his excitement, unable to get any intelligible words out through his giggling.

“Shhh,” Brian says with a finger to his lips, “We’re not done yet.”

He’s right. Goddamnit, he’s right. Not everyone has played yet. You were hoping that maybe just this once the higher being that trapped you in this hell would have this minuscule mercy on you, but you were met with a resounding no.

Brian places the gun on the floor in front of you. You can’t hear the sound of the metal gently knocking against the wood floor, but it makes you feel ice cold. Your world is rapidly going dark as you struggle to make yourself breathe.

You can feel the others’ eyes on you, three pairs of eyes staring right at you and boring a hole through your skull that’ll surely be identical to the one the bullet will leave. Maybe they’re imagining it, too.

It seems you’re not moving fast enough for them.

Toby reaches out and grabs your wrist a bit too roughly, forcefully placing your hand on the gun. You wince like you expect it to burn, but you’re left with only the cruel sensation of metal on your palm.

You weakly curl your fingers around the grip of the gun. It feels impossibly heavy as you lift it, trembling like a leaf in the wind. You force your other hand up, placing two fingers on the chamber of the revolver as you prepare to spin it.

You press the pads of your fingers against the metal, pushing down in an attempt to spin, but the gun slips from your shaking hands and clatters to the floor. You yelp in surprise and clamp your hands over your mouth, tears suddenly forming in your eyes but refusing to flow over.

Brian sighs. You can’t tell if he’s annoyed or just disappointed. He picks up the gun, and you think that maybe, just maybe he’s going to let you out, grant you some small reprieve and tell you you don’t have to do this.

Instead he wraps an arm around your waist and holds you close, and his other hand presses the barrel of the gun right to your head.

“I’ll do it for you,” He says, as if it’s nothing serious. Like he’s just grabbing a box off a high shelf to be nice.

You feel like he’s strangling you. He might as well be. It would be a more humane death.

He’s going to kill you, you think, you’re going to die in this godforsaken house with these bastards, you’re going to die in isolation with no one to honor your body.

They’ve sentenced you to death.

You think back to that question of how many have come before you. Is this what they thought about, too? Is this the first, third or twentieth time someone like you has been here? How many unfortunate circumstances have stained the floorboards red over the years this cabin has stood?

It doesn’t matter.

None of that matters.

You’re going to be the next.

That’s all there is for you to be now.

A stain of red on the old wood floors will be your only legacy.

You can hear your heartbeat in your ears as you look up at Brian. His expression doesn’t move an inch. There’s no trace of the humor he always seems to have, not even a hint of feigned compassion or sympathy for your position. He’s not letting you out of this. None of them are.

You reach down and grab Brian’s hand where it rests in your hip, your nails digging into his knuckles. He doesn’t react. He doesn’t even move beyond adjusting his finger to pull the trigger.

Each second seems to go on for an eternity, yet at the same time everything is moving far too fast. You can’t process what’s happening but you just want it over with, that’s your only choice.

He’s lifting his finger, preparing to bring it down on the trigger.

He’s pressing the barrel of the gun into your skin just a bit harder as he readies himself for whatever happens next.

This is it.

This is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is it this is…

The trigger clicks.

Then there’s silence.

…it.

Silence.

And then Toby erupts with animalistic, ecstatic laughter. It rings in your ears and echoes around your skull in an almost painful manner. You can’t stand the sound.

You’re alive.

The game is over.

All at once relief floods your body in such an overwhelming manner your vision goes dark. You can’t speak a word before you’ve gone limp in Brian’s arms, and he barely has time to put the revolver down and catch you. He holds you in his arms and makes a half hearted attempt to wake you, but when you don’t respond he looks up at Tim with a smirk.

“Out like a light.”

Tim can’t help but chuckle, and for a moment it’s even a full on laugh. This only encourages Toby, who’s flopped over onto his back as his body writhes with mirth.

Brian groans as he stands, pulling your body up with him. He throws you over his shoulder and nods to the others.

“I’m taking this one up stairs, gonna put ‘em to bed. I’m sure they’ll be whiny when they wake up, and you two better deal with it.”

Tim and Toby nod and wave him away. Toby’s finally stopped laughing enough to pull himself off the floor as Tim picks up the revolver. He shoves it into Toby’s chest, nearly pushing him over.

“Go put it up,” Tim orders.

“Or what?” Toby teases as he takes the gun, “You g-gonna get mad ‘cause I won’t clean up y-your toys?”

“Just do it,” Tim demands with a growl, clearly not amused. Toby rolls his eyes and huffs like a defiant child, but nods.

Tim starts to walk away, headed upstairs to his own room, but he pauses on the first step and turns to Toby.

“Oh, and don’t forget to load it,” He adds, “If it’s empty the next time I need it, I’m gonna kill you.”

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hoshigray · 2 years ago

Note

I WANT TOJI TO GUIDE ME (like literally almost teach me) HOW TO GIVE HIM HEAD PLZZZZ

Ohhhh, I don't know how tf I'm gonna write this, but here we go!! Hope I did alright on this one hehehe~ *sweats nervously*

Cw: Toji x fem!reader - oral (m! receiving) - it starts off cute but gets dirty, so minors DNI - reader admiring Toji's dick lol - face+throat-fucking (Toji goes at a reasonable pace) - pet names (angel, baby, cutie, sweetie, mama) - heavily detailed descriptions of a blowjob - praise - Toji laughing at you asking him to help bc what are boyfriends for, but you get a laugh out of it too - some humor. Wc: 2.8k

"You okay, kid?"

"Hmm?"

"You look lost in thought about somethin'."

"I do?" He lifts a brow and nods at you. "Oh, it's nothing, Toji, honest." The man looks at you for a few seconds as if he doesn't believe your answer, yet he goes back to watching the television, and the big hand on your shoulder brings you closer to him.

It's a lazy Sunday afternoon, and you and Toji are watching your favorite sitcom on the couch in your living room. But the show wasn't capturing your attention like it usually does. Instead, your mind wandered to other matters. Other...explicit matters.

How explicit? The two of you have been together for a long while now, and you can honestly say things have been going great. For him to be your first serious relationship — plus him being older and more mature than you — it's nice to know that things have been going way smoother than you'd thought in the beginning.

Although things may seem fine, something has been clouding your head recently. This is where explicit matters come into the conversation.

Through all this time together, it just occurred to you that you haven't given Toji head. Scratch that: you've NEVER given a blowjob, period.

It's always been the other way around. Not that you're complaining, because your boyfriend seems to enjoy eating you out. And he's actually good at it! Like, really good at it. Just reminiscing all the moments he's had you turn into jelly with just his scarred lips and relentless tongue is enough to make you go dizzy.

It's a pleasure how attentive he is to you during sex. And you appreciate that he cares for you in that regard...yet you can't help but feel like you're not a good partner in bed with your lack of reciprocity.

And it's not like you don't want to give him head. Because trust, you would've done so already! The real problem is that...you don't know how.

You've watched videos and read articles on how to do it, even practicing on a banana (per your friend's advice). Nevertheless, whenever you wish to initiate; or the opportunity arises, you just freeze on the spot and force yourself to forget about it. It's as if researching and amping yourself up is way easier than the execution.

Though, you can't just let your man be the only person doing the work — sex is supposed to be enjoyable for both parties, damn it! And you're gonna push yourself to have his dick in your mouth one way or the fucking other! But......where the hell do I start!!??

You release a defeated sigh, bringing your hand up to massage your forehead from the endless banter in your brain. And Toji watches you from his peripheral, his brows drawing downward at your display of frustration. "Alright," his gruff voice snaps you back to him as he lowers the TV volume. "What's goin' on in your lil' head, baby?"

You blink at his question. "Hmm? What do you—"

"Aht aht, don't do that with me." His jade eyes harden, and you hold back from finishing whatever you were going to say. "Somethin's wrong, so tell me. I'm over here watchin' this stupid show that you dragged me on to, and you're not even paying attention."

"Hey! It is not stupid," you counterargue, and use his comment to dissuade him from the topic. "You were very invested last week when my favorite character punched the guy she likes for stabbing her in the back! So who are you to—"

"Y/n." It didn't work. Your name was thrown at you with such seriousness that there was no use in trying to distract him. "Tell me what's goin' on. If somethin' is bothering you, don't be scared to come to me about it." He says it sternly, yet he's still gentle with his delivery.

"Toji..." You can only call him by name before he leans forward to kiss your forehead, and it almost melts all your worries away.

"Tell me."

The two of you look at each other for mere seconds, you searching for any sign of uncertainty before confessing your thoughts to him. You sigh once more and lean onto Toji, his hand rubbing on your shoulder — a silent gesture of him giving you all the time you need before confiding with him.

You told him, "Don't laugh, okay?"

He scoffs. "Can't make promises I can't keep, kid." His smile manifests when you shake your head at his shenanigans. "I won't laugh, angel."

When he uses the pet name on you, it seals the deal. It's now or never.

"I was just thinking that...I might need your help with something."

A brow is lifted. "With what?"

"Umm, it's..." Your fingers find each other to fiddle with to keep you busy from the awkward tension. "It's for......y-you know—"

"I don't know."

"I-ahem-I want," you can only gulp to ease the uncomfortable bob in your throat. ".........Iwannagiveyouablowjob."

No words. No movements. Nothing. Only the noise from the TV gives a sense of life to the silence following your confession. Even the big hand on your shoulder chose to remain completely still. And you can feel the slight quiver of your lips start to come to fruition.

Nothing happens until you feel a jolt on the shoulder you're resting on. Your face blooms hot, and your lips can't fight the uncomfortable twinge. Oh, this motherfucker is about to laugh.

"Is...Is that—ahem," A tiny gust of wind exits through his nostrils, trying to extinguish the beginning of a chortle. "Is that what was botherin' you this entire time?"

Now your ears get hot, and all you can think about is how you'll dig a nice big hole for yourself to crawl in later. God, why me??!

"W-Well, I mean, I notice how you're always doing it on me," another jolt from the older man. "And...I just feel like I'm not doing my part." He lifts his hand from your shoulder and rests it on his face. Fits of chuckles silently enter the air. "But I don't know how to....do that kinda stuff. So, I was just wondering—" He starts smacking his thigh, and with the twitch of your eyebrow, you've had enough. "Toji, I swear to Christ, if you don't fucking stop—"

And with that, the floodgates opened. The laughs he was doing a terrible job suppressing wheezed out, his hand covering his eyes while the shit-eating grin was present with laughter seeping out his system. You cover your face with your hands, shielding away from the embarrassment and not letting him hear giggles of your own.

"Oh shit, c'mere ya damn cutie." Toji pulls you in with both arms, caging you so he can place a kiss on your temple. "Pfft, kid, I'm not laughing at you. But goddamn, you looked so fuckin' stressed fr' no reason."

"But it is a reason!" You chuckle under your hands, only prompting your boyfriend to laugh harder. Once he calms down, you explain yourself further. "Toji, I'm serious. We've been together for this long, and it's always been me getting eaten out. I just think it's unfair that I get to feel good and you don't, ya know?"

He snickers. "I'm always feelin' good when I fuck the shit out of you."

"You KNOW that's not the same thing!!" Toji barks a laugh from you yelling at him, and you can't take this anymore. Removing yourself from him, you get up from the couch before you sink further into the internal pool of regret. "Just forget it. This conversation never happened...I'll just go to sleep." And hopefully, die of suffocation from my pillow.

However, before you could step toward your bedroom, Toji quickly caught your wrist. You reluctantly turn to see him looking at you with a playful smirk and soft hooded emerald eyes. "Not so fast there, sweetie." His hand slides down to fully grasp your hand, engulfing it with his size. "Ya know, you're a real cutie when worryin' about me. But don't go thinking you're not making me feel good, because you do with what you got. I woulda found someone else if you didn't." You briefly glare at him, though you know he has a point.

"Yeah, I know. But I want to do more. You always take good care of me, so...I wanna do the same for you." And Toji knows you're serious about this. It doesn't matter if you can't look directly at him because of your bashfulness; your words are sincere. God, you looked so cute it drove him crazy.

He sighs quietly with a smirk, his thumb making circles on the back of your palm. "Well, if you're really sure about putting y'r mouth on my dick," and before you could fully process his words, the older man spreads his legs for your eyes to observe. And the first thing that corrupts your vision is the outline of his erect cock, the tent prominent through his dark sweatpants. "Looks like ya got yourself a lesson. Up for it?"

You gawk at his erection for three extra seconds before you look at your boyfriend and give him a nod for confirmation. Seems like your plans of suffocation and dying in a hole have been postponed to another day.

Toji grins hard, his teeth peeking through under his scar, and then he points to the floor with his chin. As instructed, you kneel between his legs.

He pulls down the waistband of his sweatpants, freeing his cock from the clothed prison for you. And you're in awe with the sight before you. Of course, you've known his girth to be immense. You've had the damn thing inside you, for God's sake. But now, seeing his length so close, it's hard to believe you had him before. You can take note of every dent and vein of his shaft, how they structure all the way down to the base, and the pinkish-red color of the tip. It all overwhelms you and makes you second-guess what you're about to do...and the throbbing sensation down south flourishes.

"Like what ya see down there, angel?" The heat on your face worsens when you glance up and see Toji sneering down at you, and a hand comes down to massage your cheeks. "Try lickin' it first."

You gulp before following his suggestion, opening your mouth for your tongue to flick on the frenulum of his cock. You can hear him moan from the action, so you proceed and lap around the head of his cock until you feel adventurous enough to take his glans in your mouth. Toji groans from the wet walls of your mouth, and your teeth brushing against his glans makes his body jerk. "Hmmm, be careful with y'r teeth, baby. Relax that jaw and puff those cheeks a bit fr' me."

His comments are taken wholeheartedly, making sure everything goes right for him. Your cheeks go hollow for you to suck his cockhead and take in a few more of his length, his hums of pleasure egging you on. It goes well until the tip hits your uvula, resulting in your gag reflex. And Toji is quick to gently pull you from him, your saliva coating his dick.

"Woah there, sweetie. Don't forget to breathe." He coaxes while you cough. Your eyes start to water as you gasp for air to even your breathing. "We can stop now, don't want you chokin' on— Aisssh!!."

He's unable to finish his sentence when your hand strokes his cock, paired with kisses to the underside of his shaft. "No, I can keep going." You look at him with half-lidded eyes, having the man twinge his lips upward.

"Alright, then we're gonna go slow, okay? No rush." He aligns his cock to your lips, waiting for re-entry. "I'll push, and you breathe."

You give him a nod to signal you're ready, and your mouth agape to take in his returning limb. Toji brings your head in while you remind yourself to breathe, but your body jolts when you feel the tip come almost close to your uvula again. "Relax, mama, relax. Keep taking deep breaths fr' me." He coos at you, and you do as he says. Breathe in, breathe out. Once you slowly move, Toji aids you by gently pushing the back of your head toward him. And a wave of astonishment and relief hits you when you manage to have his dick hit the back of your throat.

"There ya go, cutie." He smirks at you, aware of your tiny display of giddiness. "Now, try goin' at your own pace."

With a few bobs up and down, slowly but surely, you get used to having Toji's cock in your oral cavity, going at your own tempo and enjoying yourself with this. Your movements are filled with confidence, and you whimper every time you try to go as far as you can but not too crazy.

And Toji loves every second of it. Your moans vibrate the walls around his cock, and it turns him on even more when he peers down to see you suck on him so deliciously. Spit covers your lips the more you take him in your mouth, and he groans when he feels your hands stroking him and kneading his balls (something you've learned to do from the articles you've read). "So good...Hmmph! So fucking good..." It's been a long time since Toji's been given a blowjob, and it feels so good to have you — his sweet thing — do it for him.

But then a thought pops into his mind, and the pleasure in his body churns into a different path of want and need. "Sweetie." Your eyes flutter up at him when he calls you, stopping midway through. "Wanna go a lil' further than this?" It takes a moment for you to register, but you give a curt nod with a hum on his dick, which he can only assume is a "yes."

"I'm gonna stand up, okay? So keep taking deep breaths and follow my lead." You don't answer, only gaze at him as you mentally prepare yourself. Toji rests a hand at the rear of your head as he gets up from the couch, keeping you still on his cock in hopes you don't choke. Now he's standing upright, and his sweatpants slide down to his sturdy thighs. He places both his hands on each side of your head. "I'm gonna start moving slowly, 'kay baby?"

And so he does, unhurriedly pushing his shaft into you, and your hands find purchase on his thighs as he does so. His dick that once stopped at the back of your throat eventually finds its way deeper within, and you're senses are clouded with his smell when your nose and mouth meet his pelvis. It all feels so overwhelming that tears start to form.

Toji lets you adjust to all of him for a while, grinding his hips on your lips to fully accommodate his whole girth, prompting more muffled mewls from you. He ruts his hips at your face when he notes your steady breathing. Gradually, every inch of his cock sinks into your mouth. Your head starts to pound as you enter a haze.

The pace of his thrusts eventually goes faster and faster by the minute, and the tears finally come down with every jab to your throat. Saliva runs down your chin with the smack of his balls, the head bullying your insides with the erratic rhythm. Your nails form scratch marks on his thighs from all the stimulation you're going through, but you'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn't feel so fucking good. Having your boyfriend's pelvis smack on your face on par with the sounds of you sucking him off felt like fire to your eardrums. So hot but so electrifying the more you indulge yourself.

As for the older man fucking the hell out of your face? Oh, how he missed this. It's been so long since he stuck his dick on such a pretty mouth. And your throat's tight, velvety walls have him rutting for more. He knew this would make his thirst return, and now he was sure an addiction would form from this. But right now, he can feel the surge of his orgasm arise, and his brows crease with a guttural groan as he thrusts into your face with harsh motions.

"Shit, ahhhhh shit, shit," It's so close, almost there. "Gonna cum, mama, gonna—Mmmm! Haaah, oh fuck, oh fuckin' Christ!" Through his moans of pleasure, Toji releases his load down your throat. And you're in no other position than to just take it, whimpering blissfully onto his length as he gives you a few more ruts to your face.

When he's done experiencing his ecstatic high, the older man withdraws himself from you. Your throat and mouth become empty except for his essence that you swallow. Strands of spit and come connect your wet face to him for a crude yet intimate moment before they break out.

He pulls up his sweatpants and drops down to wipe your pretty face with his hand. "So? Was I a good teacher?"

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soxcietyy · 1 year ago

Text

Racer Yuuta pt2

Yuuta x fem reader

Part 3

Continuation of part 1, I’m horrible at descriptions so… also please read authors note down below!

˚₊‧꒰𓆩 ♱ 𓆪꒱ ‧₊˚ forbidden love, brat taming, 5 year age gap, 18 + content, gagging.

Gojo ended up picking you up and taking you home. You couldn’t help but feeling so happy from tonight. You bopped your head to the music Gojo played in his car as you relived thoes memories in your head. If your uncle wasn’t here you would be screaming and kicking your feet. You Guys ended up exchanging contact information but you felt to nervous to text him first. What do you even say? You wernt trying to sound childish and just set hey. Maybe he was the type of man that like woman who played hard to get. Though that wouldn’t make sense since you were the one to confess to him.

"What had you all giddy?" Gojo asks as he noticed your absurd behavior.

You callado your hands together and look at him "I’m just so happy you took me out uncle Gojo, do you think I can come with you to the race?!" You say looking at him with your big glossy eyes.

Gojo let a loud hum as he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. Trying to think if he should let you go or not. Yuuta didn’t say anything bad about you tonight so maybe he would agree. But Geto would get back from his trip in the morning. Then again he’s leaving to America the day of the race so the odds were perfect for you.

"I’ll agree if you don’t embarrass me tomorrow at dinner. I’m having a few of the guys competing coming over and the last thing I need is you telling them my business."

All three of you lived together in this house because well they didn’t find the need in having their own place. Gojo would feel too lonely and nobody would be able to take care of you back when you were younger while Geto had trips. So it was a win win situation if they lived in one place.

"But won’t dad get mad if you bring people from drag racing home?" You tilt your head.

He let out another long hum. "I doubt it, he knows most of them. Plus it will remind him of the good old times. We were so young and wild, you probably wouldn’t be able to recognize your pop’s. I’m just not sure if you’re going to be allowed out your room but in case you are granted permission you better shut your mouth." He says as he drives down your neighborhood.

You roll your eyes knowing that you would have to convince your dad.

The next day you woke up to see you dad was home. You gave him a hug and helped him bring his things inside. You usually never woke up this early but you had eavesdropping to do. You had no idea who was coming but you hoped it was Yuuta. Like why wouldn’t he come? He’s Gojos pupil after all!

You help prepare breakfast and serve it to you dad and uncle as they spoke. Nothing could beat pancakes and bacon on a lazy Sunday. The second you heard Gojo say "hey Suguru" you knew it was going to be about a favor or idea. You quickly threw your portion of breakfast on a plate and ran to the table. Sitting down you pretend to not care about their conversation like usual.

Gojo told him about his dinner plans and your dad said that it was fine with him. Though he wanted to know who was coming over. He wasn’t going to let Gojo bring just any stranger inside.

"Yuji, Todo, Shoko, Nanami and Yuta." He said

Hearing his name made you choke on your orange juice making them both quirk a brow at you. You had no idea why you were so surprised by it since you called it not too long ago. You coughed as you waved them off telling them to ignore you.

You could see your dad’s face as he was thinking deeply. "Sweetheart are you nervous about having so many guys over? That’s okay you can stay in your room and hang out with Shoko." Your dad said looking concerned.

"No! That’s not it at all, I just couldn’t believe uncle Gojo has that many friends!" You say trying to somewhat change the topic.

Gojo let out a dry laugh. Not being able to believe you at all. He didn’t try to interrogate you about it though. Soon dinner time arrived and you had finished cooking the curry. When Gojo or your dad had small dinners like this you’d get paid to make the food. Them being rich meant heavy paychecks in your pocket. How else are you supposed to afford to keeping up with the trends. Setting your apron aside you heard the door bell ring.

You quickly run to your room to get ready for the night. You brushed your hair, did your makeup, and put on a silky light purple dress on. Everything and to be perfect tonight, you had to be perfect. Was this color good or did it make you look like a kid? You soon began to mess with the paint of your manicure. You stood at your door for who knows how long anxious to see what’s in the other side. Yuuta had yet to text you making you feel like you like this was one sided. Then again you hadn’t texted him either but that’s because you didn’t know what to say. What are you supposed to say to a guy like him? You didn’t want to seem annoying or desperate. It’s almost as if he heard your thoughts because a text soon came in.

Yuuta: I wonder what you’re doing in that little room of yours that is making you take so long. Trying to look cute for me?

You could feel your heart pounding heavily against your chest. Opening the door you walk down the stairs to see everyone is here. The first one to notice you is Yuuta who’s looking at you as if you were prey. You feel a sudden shiver knowing he has eyes on you. Those were the same dark eyes that had you melting last night. You approach the table where everyone is talking to introduce yourself but you knew there was no need.

"Ah my dear y/n, everyone this is my daughter y/n who just graduated high school not too long ago." You dad said making everyone look at you. The last part was unnecessary but either way you give them a small wave as you excuse yourself into the kitchen to start serving food. Pulling plates out the cabinet you place them out and start serving them one by one. Putting a spoon of white rice on one side and the curry in the other. When you got to the table you couldn’t help but look away from him. He made you feel so nervous that the butterflies in your stomach were about to burst out. The way he looked at you was so intimidating that it made your legs weak. Oh how you hated how this boy had a huge chokehold on you.

"They put my Angel to work I see," you hear someone say as they grab your waist. You jolt at the sudden surprise and turn to see that it was Yuuta. Today he wore a black shirt with some casual grey slacks. You give him a nod as you go back to serving food. Hands shakily holding the plate. You see as his hand comes into view and holds the plate still for you. All of a sudden you’ve become mute. Not being able to say anything but blush. His other hands snakes around your waist as they trail all the way down to your thighs. You bite your lip trying to hold on any possible squeak that may come out of you. It’s not that you hated it, more like it was driving you crazy. How his cold hand slowly moved up. Teasing you by gripping the fat of your inner thigh. His large hands then proceeded to go back up. Going under your dress just to stop when he found something interesting.

"Where have your panties gone? Did they get lost on your way here? I can also see that you have no bra on from how perky you nipples are looking through the dress" Hes says as he slids a finger in between your folds. You muffled a moan as his finger slid deeper into your wet slit. He makes you put the plate down slowly since he noticed your body quivering too much. He wouldn’t want you dropping a plate and making a mess.

"Gone all shy on me angel? You were so bratty and demanding yesterday. Or could you be trying to be on your best behavior tonight?" He asks as he brings his coated finger up to his mouth and taste your slik. This was not what you thought would happen tonight. You took him for a shy guy who was scared to do anything but here he was toying and tasting you. "You look so fucking perfect like this, my cute obedient angel letting me do anything to her."

"What’s all this chattering about?" You both freeze at the sudden question. Yuuta is the first one to turn his head around to see it was your dad standing in the kitchen entrance. Thank god Yuuta was huge and covered your body up so easily because you were mentally a mess right now.

"Ah I just came to help your daughter out with the food. Felt bad knowing that we were just sitting while she worked." Yuuta said as he grabbed the plate you set down and turned his body fully with another one he found next to him. Geto gave him an approving smile as Yuuta began to walk out the kitchen. He stopped half way in his tracks to look at you.

"By the way y/n, it tasted amazing."

Your face suddenly became beat red knowing what he was referring too. When he left you handed two plates to your dad. He couldn’t possibly think he was leaving the kitchen without being a helping hand. He gives you a tired smile and takes the plates to the table.

When you’re done you bring your plate to the table. Then you noticed the only available seat was in between Yuuta and your dad. You nervously sat down in between them and started eating. The dinner went by fast and easy. Everyone complimented your cooking skills and asked for the recipe. Gojo shut them up real quick saying that he would never allow his niece to give out such valuable information. You and Shoko spoke about how annoying these two grown adults were and there random things as you had Yuta on your left caressing your thigh. Shoko eventually pulled out a cigarette and started smoking making your dad roll his eyes.

"Shoko can you let me have a few drags?" Yuta pirks up when he sees her light it. She shrugs and hands it to him. You didn’t know he smoked at all though you didn’t know much about him period. You watch as he leaves the dinning table and walks to the back porch outside.

"I thought he stopped smoking," Itadori says

"He must be craving something, back then when he was a rookie he would smoke when he wanted something. If he wanted Icecream but couldn’t find an open shop he would simply smoke. Though that was years ago. Whatever he’s craving must be driving him crazy." Gojo laughed.

You could feel the heat began to pool down there. Your gaze turned to look at him to find him blowing out smoke while looking at you from afar. There was no way that he could be craving you?!

The dinner soon came to an end and everyone was leaving. They were bidding there goodbyes outside but Yuuta had stayed back for a bit to be with you,

"I’m guessing you’re going to the race tomorrow?" Yuta asks as he looks at you.

"That’s the plan, I guess I’ll be seeing you then." You say as you give him a hug. He gives into it and hugs you tighter. Placing two soft kisses on your forehead. Your heart sunk in pain as he waved goodbye and left.

The next day you sent your dad off to the airport. Gojo had stayed home trying to do some mechanics on his car before the race. He would do this every time he had a race, spending all day until everything seemed perfect for him. You grew tired of waiting on your uncle so you went into the garage.

"Can you make Yuuta pick me up? I’m so bored and you take forever to fix the car. I at least want to eat before going to the race." You say as you watched him roll up and down from under his car as he picked out tools.

"Can’t really make him do anything, maybe if he calls then I’ll let you go."

He says brushing your questions off because what were the odds of that actually happening. You eventually ended up leaving not satisfied with the answer but he didn’t really care. After working on his car a bit more he eventually finished changing the oil. But before he could get to something else, his phone started ringing. Shuffling around he somehow got the phone next to his ear and answered.

"The one and only," he answered

"Hey Gojo can you let y/n go out with me for the day?"

"Common man are you really giving in to her that easily? You’re not helping her spoiled brat allegations you know." Gojo said as he rolled out from under the car to sit up. When he did he was met with you sitting down on a random stool in the garage. He glared at you for somehow being able to pull strings.

"Sorry Gojo but I did promise her to take her out to eat before the race. I just forgot because iv been so busy on my car." Yuuta said

"Yea, no I get it. Fine you guys go have fun. Please keep your eyes on her. God someone really needs to say no to that girl." He mumbled the last part. You wave Goodbye to Gojo as you leave the house as soon as he got here. You immediately recognize his car and hop inside. He smiled at you sweetly as you put your seatbelt on. He liked the way you dressed, always having a skirt or a dress on to give him easy access in the future. Today you wore a tight red skirt with a black top and a leathered cropped jacket. You looked like an adorable doll that was dressed up. Maybe one day you'll let him dress you up.

on your way to eat you guys talk and talk about anything and everything. Trying to get to know each other better.

You were such a sweet, kind, funny and very adorable person If he had to describe you. That didn’t go for your other side. He could tell you have a big attitude from how you spoke. Though it wasn’t something he couldn’t handle. With the small amount of time you’ve guys spent together he was sure he had you dominated. Like right now he sent you to fetch some napkins and condiments. It’s the little things that matter. As much as he had you under control that didn’t mean that you weren’t going to try him.

Both of you sat together in a booth. Yuta was trying to enjoy his burger but you weren’t quite letting him. You had taken your heel off and rubbed your foot on his crotch. Trying to get a reaction from him that he refused to give.

"Can you let me enjoy my meal?" Yuuta asks as he takes a bite.

"Yuu I want to do it, you’re not actually going to ignore my pleading right?" You smile innocently as you press harder in his member.

He let out a sigh knowing you weren’t going to stop till he gave in. He took another bite of his food and simply ignored your attempts. As much as he loved the thought of doing it with you he knew it wasn’t the time.

"You’re not ready for it." Yuuta said as he stole a fry from your box.

He could have swore he saw your eye twitch at his response. By the time you guys got done eating it was time to head to the race. It was already getting dark and Yuta had to get there early to make sure the event was going smoothly. On your way to his car you kept telling him how you were fully capable of taking him and that he was doing too much. Again he ignored your comments and walked to your side of the car to open it.

When he did you sat on the concrete floor refusing to get in until he said yes. He clenched his jaw as he closed his eyes for a brief moment. He knew Damn well you were not throwing a fit at this moment. Before he could fully let himself calm down he heard someone call out his name. He opened his eyes and saw a guy approaching him. He didn’t look familiar though. The boy eventually made it to Yuuta but stood on the other side of the car.

"Hey man, so glad I caught up to you before you left." He panted as he tried to catch his breath.

"What’s up?" Yuuta asks.

"I need relationship advice, Not trying to sound weird or anything but I saw you and your girl in the restaurant. I saw how you spoke to her and maintained your ground not giving in to her and well I need help with that."

Yuuta did not have time for such conversation and didn’t really enjoy the fact that he was listening to your conversation. Before he could let him down and tell him he was busy he felt something weird. His eyes slowly averted to the ground to find you unzipping his pants. He whispered how much of and idiot you were right now. Fine, if you wanted this so be it.

"You just got to say no to the things you don’t like or want. Obviously you have to take into consideration on what they’re asking or saying. Though I assume you’re saying no to them because you know what’s good for them." Yuuta said as he felt you wrap your wet lips around his member. Going only half way down his shaft.

He couldn’t believe you were doing all of this when you clearly lacked practice and skills. If you were going to do something at least do it right. Though he had to admit it was cute that you were trying so hard to please him. You probably thought he was feeling so good right now. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case.

"Usually they would then try to prove to you that they were capable of doing it. That’s when you let them do it but watch them fail at it. You watch them suffer until you feel like stepping in and actually do something." He said as he leaned onto the car making you hit your head on it. He leaned in so much that he shoved himself all the way in your mouth making you gag.

Luckily the restaurant had music playing loudly outside so the guy couldn’t hear how badly you were gagging.

"With my girl I would personally let her make a fool of herself until she’s learns her lesson." he said smiling at the other guy.

you began tapping his leg begging him for air but he refused. He pulled his hips back and forward ramming into your drooling mouth. You tried to push him off of you but he was so heavy and you were starting to get weak from the lack of air. Still he thrusted deep into your throat. Your vision began to turn white as your jaw slacked.

"Thanks for the advice man, good luck on your race!" The guy said as he left. Yuuta thanked him as he pulled himself out of your mouth causing you to gasp for air. You collapsed onto his feet as you tried to compose yourself.

Yuuta crouched down grabbing you by the arms to help you up.

"At least be good at it next time you decide to go against my word and do what you want." He said helping you get in your seat. You sat there dazed as he reached into his glove box and pulled out some napkins. He folded them and proceeded to wipe your mouth clean. He didn’t want to take you to the race looking like a mess. Grabbing your purse he digs in it and pulls out a lipgloss. He might as well touch up your makeup right now since you’re not capable of doing it yourself.

AN: I couldn’t not fit everything I wanted in this chapter so the race will take place in chapter 3. Sorry for the inconvenience 😞

Tagged people who wanted a part two though I couldn’t really tags most people.

Tags: @officialholyagua @sukunaswifee

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keppa-nero · 17 days ago

Note

What do you think would be bill's reaction if the reader asked him to dance?

I've had some other requests I'm still thinking on how to do but goddamn if I'm doing this one right ahead 🗿

[Getting these images from random

Google searches btw xd]

Bill Williamson x Male! Reader;

Fluff

ASKING HIM TO DANCE

TW: Homophobic slurs mentioned \ Pretty short

Bill Williamson.

Oh he was the gang's dumb, big, stubborn, lazy man that everyone knew from exactly that description.

And, Bill being Bill, he didn't like it, he hated being seen as someone 'weak', as he for some reason thinks everyone sees him as. But he still couldn't help but live up to those expectations.

It doesn't help that, absolutely every member of his gang, probably even Jack had heard about, knew he liked men. Despite all his claims about "Having done it with Abigail, like any other in the group", no one even believed he could look a woman any way other than with annoyance.

Tonight though, while he sat next to the campfire after having some of Pearson's god awful fish stew, Bill had a beer in hand and was already thinking about spending the rest of the night drinking himself to sleep, as any other night he isn't doing night watch.

Camp was quite calm since they were having one of those nights where they just enjoyed some drinks, talked, sang, and the ones that had anything close to a partner danced to the ambience. Of course Bill, instead, just tried to make himself invisible between the rest like he wasn't feeling miserable about himself, his mind still full of that failed train heist two weeks ago, overthinking it as his fault. It was just what was clouding his mind at the moment.

So of course he didn't hear or see you approaching.

When you almost timidly reached out your hand to him, your other hand behind your back in a respectful manner, and asked him to dance... Well he didn't take it all well.

He thought you were joking. I mean of course, who'd want to willingly even want to touch Bill Williamson? You were a fine man, an attractive one in his own eyes. You were manly, gentle, and all woman in their right eyesight would fall for you, at least in. His own. Eyes.

You must be just putting on a joke to humiliate him even more.

He swatted your hand away with a frown, standing up quickly as he tried to make himself look as big and intimidating as posible so you wouldn't see past his hurt pride, leaving the beer on the log he was sitting on and glaring at you, ignoring his urge to break eye contact and check if anyone around was seeing the situation.

"You must think I'm an idiot, huh? What's with you? You think you can make a fool out of me? Y'see I ain't a goddamn girl for you to ask me out like a fag-" He simply started spitting at you in a low growly voice, his hand on your chest to push you back, roughly.

It made you freak out a little, looking back at him with a slightly open mouth with no words to come out, glancing around as if to double check no one peered. You knew very well how he was, how he'd just have the punch reflect up at any moment.

"No- Hey Bill-..." You rushed your voice quietly to not attract attention, reaching out for his hand to try to make him listen, but he just backed it away with a confused yet almost offended narrowing of his eyes.

"I ain't gon-" He started to argue back, but you quieted him down again and grabbing his hand with both of yours, making him fall in complete silence.

"No I'm- I'm... Being honest, I want to dance with you, it ain't a joke or nothing, I just wanted to ask for... Your... Ehm- H-Honest answer, without anyone around" You cleared your throat mid-sentence after realizing how eager you must have sounded like, and just looked at his eyes with a silent hopeful gaze now. It's like the embarrassment had shifted to you now.

You both just stared at each other for some long seconds while Bill processed each of your words, analyzing every letter you said and trying to mentally guess if you were being genuine or not.

"Uh-... The hell? You crazy...?" He muttered with his gaze down, silence falling between the two. He back at you and raised his eyebrows slowly as he realized you meant it. "Oh, really?- Like?... Now?..."

His eyes darted to your hands on his, and had to clear his throat too after realizing how much like a little boy he had to look like.

He was the type to get all red and flustered over someone brushing his pinky.

He trailed off in a similar manner as you did earlier, eyes widening and then darting everywhere as he nodded frantically, grumbling in a low tone to make up for his stutter just now.

"Yeah of course, uh, just because you want... Uh..."

It made you smile widely seeing his reaction and affirmation, taking the initiative and forgetting your own racing heart, as you guided him a bit farther from the fire to listen to the others singing and have more space, also to avoid the most probable guys from insulting or laughing at you two.

"You just, you know, place your hand on my shoulder and I'll do the same" You spoke below your usual pitch, placing your hand on his shoulder and the other one on his waist.

Him though, was still completely freaking out mentally, looking at your eyes with his wide as plates, noticing how he was acting and, once more, tried to cover it up and did as you said, with a quick "Yeah sure" under his breath, putting his hand on your shoulder while the other awkardly rested on your forearm, looking down at his own limbs like they were alien.

You couldn't deny you two looked like teenagers with a crush on each other holding hands with the way you dumbly smiled and he stood quiet, not an uncomfortable or awkard quiet, but just a flattered and happy one.

His eyes were darting all around you when you two started dancing, trying to follow your feet movements to not step on each other, without realizing how hard he was pressing his lips to not say something stupid or blurt out non sense.

You though, were looking directly at his eyes like nothing else was around, pretty much sharing the same feeling as him as in, nervousness and happiness. Which only spiked up when he was secure enough to not be scared to mess up.

"This is- They'd call me a fag for this one" He grumbled again while his gaze got hopeless and lost in yours.

You instead chuckled, well, more like giggled, bringing him a bit closer while you two danced in a sweet slow.

"While they don't see us... I think we're fine" You said in a whisper.

The dance ended after whatever group of drunks stopped singing from a distance, and you two pulled away. Bill though, couldn't help the detail to take your hand and quickly kissing your knuckles softly, pulling them back like it'd bite him.

But he just went red after you decided to kiss his forehead after tipping up his hat, finding it endearing how he reacted to any small detail.

"What about we two go, uh, do this in Valentine or something next time... If you want to, I mean, less people know us there" He then suggested nervously after forcing eye-contact with you, his lips moving up into a smile as dumb and sweet as yours, just that his, being Bill's, didn't look as friendly. Yet in your eyes it did.

"Of course, yeah... I'll- I think I'm gonna go sleep already anyways... You uhm, have a good night eh" Your voice left your mouth awkwardly, tipping your own hat down as a gentleman wave off, like you usually did, just that this time you swear your hands were trembling slightly, just like Bill's did when you held it.

And like that, you walked off to your personal tent, after hearing his own silent 'See you later'.

It was incredible how it managed to break down a man as Bill's walls, making him a nervous mess and think about this moment for the rest of the night and the rest of the week, until you two met this privately again. At least it wasn't one-sided, it was weird seeing an attractive, gaze-driving man like you get all mushy too...

You'd like sharing a cigarette with him, honestly.

_______________________________________

There it is. YA HAVE IT, PLEASE TELL ME YOU LIKE IT, I TRIED NOT TO BE TOO MUSHY BUT IT CAME OUT KINDA LIKE IT 🦐

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption two #bill williamson #rdr2 x male reader #male reader #bill williamson x reader #red dead fandom #gay #fluff #headcanon #short #cutie pie

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khuzena · 2 years ago

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✎Regret, love and death

Itoshi Rin, Itoshi Sae, Michael Kaiser x g/n!reader

Summary: The bllk boys break up with you not knowing you're terminally ill and they meet you again but this time you're dying right in front of them.

Warning: Angst, no fluff, breakup and breakdown, death, grief

A/n: this is super cliche ik but this has been on my mind for months now, it's time i actually write about it. Listening to ditto while making this. I tried to make it g/n so bear with me

Itoshi Rin

"Stay in the middle, like you a little"

Itoshi Rin who left you months ago after a stupid argument he wishes he could've prevented. He tells himself that he doesn't need you anymore and that he'll never open up his heart again.

Itoshi Rin who gets mad when he sees happy couples, he swears it's anger and jealousy but it's mostly confusion and betrayal. He believed that it was your fault that he became this vulnerable but he willingly gave his heart to you.

Being a professional athlete like Itoshi Rin it's common to regularly get some injuries here and there so he visits the hospital.

He waited patiently right outside his clinic, an earbud in one ear and he listened to the environment around him. Squeaky wheelchairs, cries from a hospital room nearby and patients conversing in daily chit-chat. The line at the clinic was taking too long so he decided he'll go next time; but something caught his eye. The soles of his shoes clack on the marble floor at the empty hallway and the music he's listening to but he hears the faint beating of a heart monitor. Then, he sees your name in one hospital room.

He couldn't believe his eyes. There was a folder attached loosely on the door, your name written in lazy cursive and numerous descriptions he couldn't understand. Rereading and rereading the name on the folder over and over again, his eyes narrowed as he decided to look over to the glass window at the door; he saw you. Rin doesn't understand why you were here and why the folder was marked "terminal— confined" . The writings are too messy for him to understand but his heart beats loudly through his body like a gong.

He tries to convince himself it's probably someone else but he knew you too much to know that the one stuck in that wrinkly hospital bed was you.

He has to go, he has to but he doesn't. He takes a deep breath and opens the door. You open your eyes as you realize your peace was disturbed from the loud creaking of the door. You scrunch your nose and blink your eyes as you take a look at the figure standing at the side of your bed, it was Rin.

"You… why are you here?" He whispered, you could barely hear him but he stared down at you with pity, anger, grief— you don't know.

"I should be the one asking you that." Your voice was muffled by the oxygen mask strapped to your head as you sat yourself up and looked up to him, he tried to avoid your gaze as he looked over to the IVs inserted into your wrists, wires everywhere he was sure he almost stepped on one.

Rin furrowed his brows in irritation, all this pent up anger from the break up bursting all at once, "What the fuck happened to you?"

You gave him a weak smile, "A week before we broke up… I was diagnosed with a heart disease. I couldn't tell you what happened to me, then we fought but I was too scared and stressed I broke things off."

Rin breathes raggedly, fear and guilt flooding his senses; wondering why he was such an idiot to leave you.

"Will you get better?"

You smile again at his stupidity, you know he's seen the document attached at the door saying 'patient in hospice' but Rin wants to hear it from you, he wants you to confirm his thoughts. Maybe even deny it so he'll feel better. You feel tears drip down your arm as you watch him shaken like he's seen a ghost.

"I won't, so go now."

Rin wants to pour out all his emotions, everything welling up inside his heart— the thoughts brewing in the depths of his heart that ate him alive from the time you were seperated but he holds himself back.

His knees buckled and his strength prior to this incident dissipated into nothing as he held onto his remaining resolve. Like the coward he always was, he leaves and never comes back… but he will come back to you eventually; with a chrysanthemum in hand this time and a fresh black suit he picked out.

Itoshi Sae

"Don't want no riddle, Say it, Say it back"

Itoshi Sae who visits Japan for the first time in months, only going back to renew his passport.

It wasn't his intention to pass by your old friend group in public, he eavesdropped on their mindless conversation then they started talking about you.

Itoshi Sae listens to their conversation, getting some details about you. Hearing that you got confined somewhere and that there was no one to take care of you other than the nurses and hospice workers stationed at your room.

Itoshi Sae who tries to keep that newfound information out of his mind but the thought of you being confined in a hospital is making his heart race. Not in love nor from the butterflies he used to get when talking to you— no. He couldn't stop thinking of you. He promised to himself to never interact with you, avoid every single thing that reminded him of you but he couldn't. He just couldn't.

Itoshi Sae who visits the hospital and asks where you are, pretending that he was a visitor to the nurses was easier than he thought.

"Are you asking about that patient?"

He nodded, the nurse was stupid enough to fall for his charms as she sent him the directions to your room. Sae knows what dangerous game he's playing, if he comes back to you again then it defeats the purpose of avoiding you forever like he promised himself but he still goes.

It was a nice afternoon, birds chirping and he saw little children from the nursery running around in the hallways with toys in their hands. He mentally prepared himself for what he was about to see, turning away from your hospital room for a moment before entering.

His eyes softened for a moment when he laid his eyes on you, you were reading a book— an eerie one at that. Sae raised an eyebrow when he noticed that you didn't hear him enter, what if you were deliberately ignoring him? He was sure you were but he didn't catch your attention until he stepped closer to your bed, a shadow looming over you as you slowly looked up to him.

The two of you stare at each other for what it felt like forever, he's still looking at you like that. Love in his irises but there's a tint of melancholy.

You could see Sae saying something to you, you tried to read his lips but his words fell on deaf ears.

Sae was getting irritated on why you didn't respond but you took the white board that was resting on your bedside table. He patiently watched you write something on the board, clack, clack, clack.

'Im deaf. I can't hear you.'

Just months ago you were fine but he gets more ill with worry when his mind starts to drift and wonder what could've happened to you when he left you here all alone.

You erased the writing on the board, giddily like a child as you handed him the board next, signaling him to also write you something.

The athlete hesitated for a moment before grabbing the board off your hands, writing something hastily. He feels like if he wasted any more time he'll lose everything— but he knew that he already did the moment when he called it quits months ago.

'What happened', he wrote on the board, streaks of ink staining his palm but that's the least of his worries.

You sat up in a more comfortable position before opening the drawer, taking a clipboard, medical documents clipped to the board. Sae reads the papers, his throat starts burning and he feels tears building up in his eyes. He flips through the papers, information about your condition printed on the tiny pieces of paper as he reads through everything.

You couldn't understand what he was muttering under his breath but you were sure it was something… the way he bit his lip to hold back the tears and the way his hands got sweaty as he scanned the board.

Sae loved many things, you, soccer, coffee and the beach. There was something about hospitals that made him uneasy. Hospitals correlated to injury and death— a big no no for him. But as an athlete, a pro one at that it's not surprising that he regularly visits the hospital for nutrition advice or medicine. Though… this one was his worst visit yet. He told himself that he won't ever cry or love you again, that's why it's 'Sae loved' but he realizes he still loves you. Even though you're stuck on the hospital bed, sickly and dying, your arms littered with scars from the tubes that go in and out your skin and maybe the way you look so frail and skinny now compared to what you looked like months ago; he still loves you. He realized that in this moment he's always going to be looking for you the way you pathetically looked for him in the hospital, wishing he was there after you two broke up.

At least now the gods were merciful enough to grace you with his presence for the last time, even in this situation you still smiled at him like he deserved to see that again.

Itoshi Sae who visits you again tomorrow before you pull off the plug, Pain plastered on his face as he holds you tightly. He broke his promise.

To you, to never hurt you.

To himself, to never love you again.

Michael Kaiser

"Oh say it ditto, Can't wait till the morning, So say it ditto"

Michael Kaiser pretends he's fine after the break up and to distract himself from the pain, he dates other people— looking for someone who can fill the void you carved in his heart, looking for you.

Michael Kaiser who still wears the cardigan you bought him, giving him solace and comfort when he curls up in his bed alone, wishing you were there with him.

You and Kaiser didn't break up on bad terms, more like a confusing and neutral breakup. He told you he was done and you didn't beg him to stay, after all he neglected you for his selfish desires. He's like an icarus who has flown too close to the sun, his ego representing the melting wax wings of icarus— it burned your skin and melted your patience.

Michael Kaiser still stalks you in his other account you forgot that existed. He wouldn't admit it but he patiently waited for an update on your account.

Michael Kaiser who stalks your account and finally sees something. Your parents' post talking about you being stuck in the hospital.

Michael Kaiser doesn't cry, he can't. Images on the posts ingraining— burning itself in the deepest parts of his brain then it triggers something in him. Confusion.

He doesn't know the exact details of your situation but he's too curious to scroll past the post.

Michael Kaiser who gets a cab and arrives at your hospital, like a man with no shame he looks for your room.

It was nighttime and the hospital was uncannily quiet, he wasn't sure why but the guard was doing a terrible job at guarding the entrance of the hospital. Kaiser walks past the sleepy guard, ignoring the thumping sound of the guard falling on the floor as he makes his way to the lady on the desk.

"What brings you in here, sir?"

He pushes up his glasses, "I'm looking for my lover, [patient name]", he says boldly, lying through his teeth but he knows it's the only way they'll let him in.

"Give me a minute," the nurse starts flipping through the hospital log book, "They're at room 405, third floor."

Kaiser nods, thanking the nurse as he takes the elevator.

'ding' Kaiser enters the elevator, checking his watch while waiting for it to arrive at the third floor. The elevator was dimmed and it looked like a scene straight from horror movies, another old lady in a wheelchair strolls to the elevator.

"What's a handsome young man like you doing in the dead of the night here?" The grandma says in a hoarse voice, grey hairs covering her face as she holds onto both her wheelchair and fruits.

Though Kaiser is an asshole, a liar, he naturally had a soft spot for children and the elderly. "I'm here for my… lover" he doesn't know what gave it away but the older woman noticed the hesitance in his voice.

The grandma nodded at his reply, 'ding!'

"I guess this is my stop." Kaiser stepped out of the elevator, waving goodbye to the elderly woman and ambled in the hallway.

The scent of disinfectant invaded his nostrils, though the smell gets more diverse as he passes by different hospital rooms. He hears people screaming and crying at the room to his left and the other room dead silent, as if a corpse inhabited the room to his right.

Sweat starts trickling down his forehead when he counts the hospital room's numbers and realizes he's getting closer to yours. 'shit, shit, shit' his mind spiralling into madness, anxiety as he braces himself for what he's about to see.

His legs started to feel like jelly as his feet dragged him in front of your hospital room. A feeling of uncertainty, something he never felt again after breaking up with you.

Months ago when you two broke up he wondered if maybe you'd crawl back to him, like a child who ran away but comes home again the day after, but you didn't.

The door pulled open as he made his way inside, the lights were turned off but the sound of humming took him by surprise.

"I can hear you, you know."

Oh, that voice. That voice that could soothe him on days like these, your voice so gentle he thinks it's a sweet melody, a lullaby so sweet it would bring the devil down on his knees begging and repenting for forgiveness if he ever heard your voice.

The German boy doesn't come forward, only staring at your disheveled figure on the bed, waiting for death themselves to take you away from your misery.

"Have you eaten yet?"

Your fingers traced the lamp before finding the switch, making a flick sound as the soft illuminating glow lights up the room. You nod as you sit up, hugging yourself as you find comfort in the bandages that wrapped around your body.

"I'm sorry." It was the first time he's ever said this to you in ages, he wished he said this to you back then, he wishes that he was there for you.

Maybe he was the devil, cruel and mean, strong yet so weak. His knees buckled as he let out a choked sob, his fears that builded up couldn't hold in much longer as tears streamed down his face.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Kaiser says in between his sobs, the prideful man being broken down into a pathetic, crying mess.

Your fingers fiddled together in anxiety, you always had that stupid habit of yours when in distress. As much as you couldn't forgive Kaiser— he's too weak, too vulnerable for you to ignore.

Still Kaiser was shameless but not too shameless to go even a few inches closer to your bed, his mind racing— thinking that everything is all his fault as his heart rate goes up.

"Why should I? We're not even together." His chest tightens, if anyone could see him right now they'd think he's a fucking idiot— crying over the dying lover he left to rot in the hospital? Piece of shit.

"Yeah I know." He tries to calm himself down but he knows it's useless when you pick up on his uneasy behavior.

Kaiser wanted to ask you, 'let's get back together?' or maybe 'please forgive me' because he's a shameless prick but it's the first time he doesn't let his pride take over his senses.

He grieves right in front of you, your eyes never leaving his as his body language is signaling you, begging you to say something but it's better that you didn't.

He has all the time in the world to grieve for you after all, he's a shameless, selfish man… isn't he?

Notes: hell nah i'm sorry if there was so many grammar mistakes and stuff this isn't really proofread and i'm thinking of opening requests so like uh what do you guys think should i open requests

Written by @khuzena. Likes, reblogs and comments are always appreciated. ♡

#blue lock fanfic #blue lock x reader #bllk x reader #blue lock #itoshi rin x reader #bllk angst #bllk fluff #blue lock ansgt #michael kaiser x reader #itoshi sae x reader #itoshi sae angst #itoshi rin angst #michael kaiser #what have i done #go girl give us nothing #blue lock fluff #✎♡Zena's thoughts~

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loving-n0t-heyting · 10 days ago

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the standard suite of "positions in the philosophy of mathematics" ("formalism", "intuitionism", "platonism", etc) reminds me of the canonical trio of "positions in normative ethics" ("consequentialism"/"utilitarianism", "deontology", "virtue ethics"), both in that a) these taxonomic schemas seem much more popular among non-(professional )philosophers, at least when presented this simply; and, ii) their appearance is a sure sign the conversation is about to get much more boring and much less tied to puzzles that might actually emerge from the subject matter. but they come with the supposed seal of real professional philosophical consensus, so invoking them manages to conflate this muddledness with the prestige of philosophy as a discipline, either by elevating the former or degrading the latter

as ordinarily deployed, they seem to be primarily an excuse to flag-wave and condescend. "platonists" are credulous mystics who probably still believe in santa clause; "deontologists" are hotheaded dogmatists who to save one would condemn a hundred to die. "formalists" reduce mathematics to a mere game of pencil-scratching; "utilitarians" are unfeeling automata insenstive to the language of the heart. (note that these criticisms could not be better designed to flatter the sympathies of the camps at which they are directed.) some are better than others: "utilitarian" and "formalist" come close enough to being well-defined, sufficiently so to have a fair number of self-proclaimed devotees; "deontologist" seems to be basically a slur; "intuitionism" was an actual self-adopted banner for a philosophical/mathematical programme thats been basically dead for about a century. but generally speaking, their function is less to illuminate differences of opinion than to reduce them to a familiar set of rallying cries and slogans

if you find yrself trying to articulate differences of opinion about these subjects—or better yet, resolve these differences—reach for description instead of buzzwords. try to say clearly, in ordinary words, what you and yr interlocutor seem to think, and why you think them. its more honest, and less repetitive

i said above that idt they mostly see much use, at least without many qualifications, among actual professional philosophers. so now comes the part where you ask: well, lnh, you study philosophy, what are the real battle lines that get drawn? and my answer is: idk, go read the sep articles or smth? ive read enough to say this is not how (most) normative ethicists or philosophers of mathematics talk, but they are very much not my wheelhouse. (also its been so long since ive "kept up with the literAture" on anything, bc im a lazy wastrel.) if it were, idk, vagueness or smth, i would be maybe entitled to a "professional opinion," but not about these kinds of debates in ethics or phil math. if i ever talk about either topic, it is purely as a soapboxing layman. if i come across as pompous when doing so, its entirely my personality to blame, not academia inflating my head

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spenceragnewfics · 7 months ago

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THE INTERN | Chapter One

Spencer Agnew x Younger!Intern!Reader

TW: None

Word Count: 1.9k

Description: Y/N has been a fan of Smosh since they could remember. Now about to enter their senior year of college, they get an opportunity to be an intern at the Smosh Office and their first day has arrived.

Every new job comes with stress. You never know what is going to happen. You could have awful co-workers, creepy or mean bosses, and horrible workloads pushed onto you by lazy co-workers, the list is infinite.

The stress comes even more when it’s something that could become your first job in the real world. Internships are a major stepping stone in any college kid’s career, it’s the start of being over with college and being a person in society.

That’s all that is racing through Y/N’s head as they look at the studio in front of them. Many people would consider them lucky with their internship. You see, Y/N is a long-time fan of Smosh, a very popular YouTube channel, and was somehow able to get an internship with the company for the summer.

They didn’t know exactly where and who they would be working with, except for knowing that their main job would be helping with social media. Looking at their phone, it shows that they still have ten minutes until they should be there but the anxiety was killing them too much to be any later.

Taking a deep breath, they grip onto the bag on their shoulder and walk to the front door. Pushing the button, they wait until a voice comes over the speaker, “Hi, how can I help you?” They lean down to be face-level with the camera. “Umm, I-I-I’m Y/N L/N. I’m the new intern.” Their voice comes out nervous, hoping they didn’t get the days confused or anything. They read the email what felt like a million times to make sure they were right.

“Yes! Alright, come on in! I’ll meet you at the door.” They hear the door unlock and push it open. Walking into the cool space, the heat from the outside slowly starts to melt from them. Looking around, the office looks much cooler in person. A lot of it is familiar but some things are new or haven’t been shown in videos.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you!” A gentle voice says, pulling them from their daydream to look at the woman in front of them. The short Filipino woman standing in front of her is smiling kindly, “I’m Selina. Welcome to Smosh.” The woman sticks her hand out for Y/N to shake.

“I’m Y/N, which you already knew, and I know who you are. I’ve been a fan of the channel for a long time. That sounds creepy though, I’m so sorry.” They say while shaking her hand, thankfully the woman has a good sense of humor and is laughing. “It’s not creepy at all. I knew it would come with being in some videos. It’s always cool to meet fans. This must be like a dream for you.”

“Yeah, honestly, the whole process felt like a major dream. I can’t believe I’m here. I had my friends dump cold water on me when I got the email about me getting the internship. It was dumb but helped make sure it was real.” They confess as they play with their hands. Nerves still being the main thing Y/N is feeling.

“I can tell you're nervous. Don’t be. I promise, this place is very chill and the people are amazing. As long as you are willing to work, you’ll fit in well here.” Selina says, comforting the nervous mess that is in front of her. “Thank you, so where do I go?” They ask after taking a deep breath.

“Well, I will give you a tour, and then when we get done with that we will go to the conference room and you will meet some of the people you’ll be working with and some of the higher-ups. That does include Ian and Anthony.” Y/N perks up a little, their mood becoming more optimistic by the second because if everyone is like Selina, then this will be the best time ever.

They follow Selina as she takes them around the office. It’s very empty because it’s a shooting week so most of the office is helping with filming stuff. She got to see all the different pods and meet some of the office-focused staff like Emily, Josh, Peter, and Marcus.

Once the tour is over, the two head back to the front so Y/N can go to the conference room. “And that over there is the conference room. That’s where we do most of our big meetings and important stuff. That concludes the tour, if you have any questions please don’t be afraid to ask.”

“Thank you so much, Selina. I will keep that in mind.” Y/N says, slightly laughing as the two walk to the conference room. “Now this is where I must leave you. I am very excited to be working with you.” She says, giving Y/N a comforting squeeze on the arm before walking away.

Turning to the door, they can see a few people in the conference room. All people They recognize. Tommy, Alé, and Zoe are the only ones in there so far. Taking a breath, they open the door with a kind smile, “Hello, I’m Y/N L/N. It’s nice to meet you.” They say as they walk in, catching the attention of the room.

“Oh, you scared me! I didn’t expect you already, it’s so nice to meet you. I’m Zoe.” Says the blonde woman, walking over to shake her hand. “Nice to meet you, as well.” They say as they walk to the table. “I’m Alé, welcome to Smosh. You impressed us with your interviews and work.” The CEO says and it makes their heart soar.

“That means a lot. Thank you.” Alé gives them a kind smile before they turn to Tommy. “Hello, it’s nice to meet you fellow social media person,” he says, a little hint of amusement in his voice. “It’s nice to meet you as well. I’m so excited to be here, honestly. This is a dream.”

“Okay, you don’t have to butt kiss anymore. You’re already in.” He jokes, making Y/N laugh. “It shouldn’t be too much longer until the rest are here. I think they’re finishing a shoot.” Alé says and Y/N sits down. They look around, not knowing where to sit. “I won’t bite, I swear,” Tommy says, patting the seat next to him.

They sit next to him and put their bag on the table. Pulling out their laptop and tablet, Y/N opens up the important stuff that holds their digital work, video ideas that her advisor said could come in handy, and some examples of videos she’s worked on for her classes.

A few minutes pass with the groups sharing small talk until the door opens. Looking over, Y/N feels nervous all over again as Ian and Anthony walk into the room with Erin D. walking in behind them. “So sorry, we’re late. The rest are coming in soon.” Anthony says before turning to Y/N.

Their eyes widen when he looks at them, not believing this is real again. “Well hello there, you must be Y/N. I’m Anthony.” He says, walking over with his hand stretched out. “I know, I’ve been a fan for a while. Thank you again for this, it’s a dream come true.” They say as they shake his hand. Ian chuckles while walking over, “We’re glad to have someone so talented on our team. Your work is amazing.” He says, shaking their hand as well.

“That means a lot. Y’all’s videos got me through years and years of homework and projects.” They say, laughing a bit. “Well, we’re glad to have helped,” Anthony says as the door opens again.

This time Shayne and Courtney walk in and behind them is someone who makes her heart race for a different reason. Her breath halts when Spencer walks into the room, dressed in a jean jacket, button-down, rolled jeans, and boots. His curly hair was held back by a cap on his head.

The three sit down together, across from Y/N and Tommy. “Okay, everyone is here. Thank you all for coming. Today we are welcoming a new addition to our office for the summer. Y/N L/N is coming to us from across the country and is currently in their senior year of college. Welcome, Y/N.” Alé says and the room claps.

Tommy motions for them to stand up, “Uh, hi. I didn’t expect to say anything but I’m Y/N, if that’s not obvious. I’m a social media management and multi-media production major. I’m a little nervous being so far from home but excited to be here for the summer.” They say, a shy smile on their face as they look around the room.

Their eyes stop on Spencer who is looking at them with a soft expression. The kind he has when he’s listening to people, the same one they’ve seen in many videos. “It’s very exciting to meet you, Y/N. Welcome to the team.” Courtney says, a kind smile on their face.

“Yeah, I’m excited to see what you can bring to the games channel,” Spencer says, keeping his eyes on them as they sit down. “Yes, thank you for bringing that up Spencer. Y/N, we have looked at the stuff you’ve done and from what you’ve told us plus input from your recommendations. You’ll be mainly helping with the gaming channel.” Alé says.

“Really? That’s so cool.” Y/N says, a smile bright on their face. “Yeah, so you will work with Tommy and me mostly to get things done,” Spencer says and they nod. “Okay, I think that’s all we have. This was just a meeting for you to get to know a few people, mostly the ones you will be working under.” Zoe says.

“Okay, sounds great.” Y/N says, an optimistic smile bright on their face. Everyone stands up, those who already met Y/N leave while Shayne, Courtney, and Spencer stay behind.

“So, Y/N, what have you done at college besides your degree stuff?” Courtney asks, wanting to get to know the newbie more. “Well, I am a part of my school’s esports team. We’re still kind of new but have done pretty well. I also was on the university paper but I stopped so I could do my internship.” They explain.

“That sounds super cool, you must be a good gamer to get on an esports team.” Shayne acknowledges. “I try, it’s not something I do all the time. Mostly for fun and I kinda joined because of my ex but that’s a long story.”

“Ah, the things we do for love.” Courtney reminisces, “I think you will fit in great here. I know Trevor will be happy to have someone close to his age.” Spencer jokes. “I’m super excited, this is honestly a dream. I’m not even sure I’m awake right now.” Y/N confesses.

“I think I know how we can break that. Since it’s your first day, you can sit back and watch how things go then we’ll throw you into the deep end tomorrow.” Spencer says, his eyes never leaving Y/N. “Ooo, that sounds scary. Fun, but scary. I like it.” They say, perking up and putting their bag on their shoulder.

Courtney laughs as they wrap their arm around them, “You are gonna be perfect here.” They say as they all walk out of the conference room.

#smosh #smosh cast #smosh games #smosh mouth #smosh pit #spencer agnew #spencer agnew x reader #fluff #spencer agnew fluff #romance #fanfiction #imagine #request #smosh x reader #smosh imagine

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mirai-e-jump · 1 year ago

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Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger Character Book: The Bonds Connected by Moffun and Racules?! Main Cast Member Interviews (translations below, long post)

(other pages)

Murakami Erica x Hirakawa Yuzuki x Hasegawa Kasumi

"Since this is a roundtable discussion, please introduce each other. Let's have Murakami-san with Morfonia, Hirakawa-san with Hymeno, and Hasegawa-san with Rita."

Hirakawa: Hymeno Ran is the queen of Ishabana, she's a beautifully gorgeous, strong and cool woman. Also, she's very compassionate…

Hasegawa: (to Murakami, in a low voice) This is pretty embarrassing.

Murakami: It's not about me, it's about the role I play.

Hirakawa: …If there's someone in trouble, she'll always reach out to them. She's a person who focuses on what she wants to protect and the path she believes she should take, and then pushes forward toward that goal.

Murakami: Morfonia is the retainer for Gokkan's king, Rita Kaniska. She works together with Rita, but is a lazy slacker who hates her job.

Hasegawa: (staring intensely at Murakami)

Hirakawa: She's mad (laughs).

Murakami: She also says, "I'm going home" as soon as the work day is over, but when it comes to Rita, she can become alittle emotional, and she watches over Rita and can't leave them alone.

Hasegawa: Rita Kaniska is the king of Gokkan and the Supreme Court Justice…..wait, that's not right.

Hirakawa: The Chief Judge of the International Court of Justice

Hasegawa: Right, the Chief Judge of the International Court of Justice. It's hard just saying it out loud again (laughs). At a glance, they appear strong, dignified, and unmoved by anything, but they're probably the most human among all the members of the Royal Sentai, or rather, they have alot of weaknesses…..they're cute (laughs). At the start of the broadcast, Rita stubbornly insisted about being strong and being equal, but as they came into contact with the kings, Morfonia, and various other people, they learned how to rely on others. In a real sense, I think they're getting stronger.

Murakami: Amazing. It's like there's nothing you don't know about Rita.

Hasegawa: (laughs). I think Rita will become stronger in the future by showing more of their vulnerabilities, so I'd like to see Rita like that….I'm just saying what Morfonia is thinking! (laughs). Regardless, Rita is a wonderful person.

"Next, in regards to the other two, we'd like to hear about the similarities and differences between them and the character they play."

Hirakawa: Marie (Murakami) is as elegant as a princess in her gestures, speech and actions. Also, she's strong and cool. Although, she's not as selfish as Hymeno.

Murakami: Eh~?

Hirakawa: She seems to be very similar to Hymeno, but Marie likes to mess around more than I expected, so I guess that part's alittle different. You like talking with everyone, right?

Murakami: I like it.

Hirakawa: When Hymeno sees everyone messing around, I feel like she'd say something like, "How childish…"

Hasegawa: I wonder, does Hymeno want to be around where banter is going on?

Murakami: I think she'd be strong and say, "I don't want to join in." That's definitely the opposite of me.

Hirakawa: Marie has a playful side, and I think that the description of "cute" fits her well. In reality, I think she tends to be described as "cool."

Murakami: Things like, "She's just like a ViVi Model" and such? (*fashion magazine)

Hirakawa: That's right. Of course there are many cool things about her, but I get the impression that she has more of a cute side. Also, I wonder if Morfonia and Kasumin (Hasegawa) are the opposite. Or atleast, the exact opposite when it comes to work. She definitely doesn't have an attitude of not wanting to do anything.

Hasegawa: Well, it's work (laughs).

Hirakawa: Kasumin is older than me, but she speaks from my point of view, so it's easy to talk to her. I think Kasumin is alot like Morfonia in the sense that she adjusts to the people around her, not just with me. She goes at her own pace, and also feels "floaty," which is just like Morfonia.

Hasegawa: I recently learned that I'm a person who likes to go at my own pace (laughs). I didn't think that was the case….

Hirakawa: I basically go at my own pace, but I can adapt to others depending on the situation.

"Now then Murakami-san, we'd like to ask you about Hirakawa-san and Rita, and Hasegawa-san and Morfonia."

Murakami: Yuzuyan (Hirakawa) and Rita are similar in that they're both dignified and unafraid. Also, Rita is the unmovable king who is "quiet", but Yuzuyan is a "movable" person (laughs). In episode 28, Rita and Yanma's bodies were swapped, and Rita, who had Yanma's personality, was just Yuzuyan's usual self. I think that difference is also appealing.

Hirakawa: I'd agree that I'm "the king of hyperactivity." It's really true (laughs).

Murakami: Kasumin and Morfonia are similar in that they both end their words in cute ways. Morfonia says things like "Sow~wy" but Kasumin also says things like "I'm sor~ry" (in a cute way), and the way they speak is abit similar, they also share the same loose slurring of their speech. Like Yuzuyan said, the difference is that Morfonia doesn't take her work too seriously.

Hasegawa: Now then, it's my turn. Hirakawa Yuzuki is a person who has the mindset that she has to behave herself in front of others, and is thinking about alot of things in her head. I guess she's similar to Rita in that respect. The difference is that she's "movable" (laughs).

Murakami: You're right about that.

Hasegawa: The only time Hirakawa Yuzuki is calm is when she's sleeping in the dressing room. When she's not talking to anyone….

Hirakawa: Is there ever a time when I'm not talking?

Hasegawa: Not really I guess (laughs). And then there's Marie and Hymeno. It might just be my imagination, but I think Marie has a firm idea of what she wants to be and how she wants to live her life. Isn't it the same way with Hymeno? Another similarity is that they're both beautiful. Her gestures, or rather her movements are so beautiful! I'm not sure how to describe it…..

Hirakawa: Picturesque?

Hasegawa: Right! It's picturesque!

Murakami: Uw~ow, I love that~ (laughs).

Hasegawa: Me too~ (laughs). I think that they're similar in that way, and I think she's a perfect fit for the role of Hymeno. The difference is that, like Yuzuchin mentioned, when there's a lively gathering, Hymeno is like, "I won't get involved with that," while Marie is like, "Let me in! Let me in!"

Hirakawa: Marie is adorable.

Hasegawa: Yeah, she's cute. Similar to Hymeno, she's also kind and attentive. Hymeno tries to be strong and not let it show.

"Now, we'd like to know how you interpret what the character you're playing thinks about the other two characters. For example, Hirakawa-san, if you could tell us what Rita thinks about Hymeno and Morfonia."

Hirakawa: Rita sees Hymeno as the closest thing to a friend among all the kings. They can't say for sure yet that, "This person is my friend", but their relationship definitely isn't just that they're kings to each other. Compared to the beginning, they can tolerate Hymeno's selfish personality. At first, Rita didn't necessarily reject Hymeno's behavior, but they didn't even try to understand them. They didn't have enough interest in not only Hymeno, but all the kings to want to understand them. But now, their stance is that they want to understand her feelings. They've developed a sense of camaraderie with everyone, and among them, Hymeno has become the person they want to understand the most.

"In episode 30, Hymeno called them a "friend," how do you imagine Rita felt about that?"

Hirakawa: I think they were happy. Rita is stopped by Hymeno when they try to seal away Grodie, the enemy of Karras, former king of Gokkan, as well as Hymeno's parents. While I was acting, I had about a 5% feeling that I wanted someone to stop them. I think that Hymeno, who actually stopped them, became a very special person, different from Morfonia. And since sealing him would freeze Rita as well, it can be said that she saved their life. After Hymeno stopped Rita, she told them, "(about Grodie) We'll defeat him. We'll do it together." Having someone who says, "Together," must be a great source of support for Rita.

"Regarding Morfonia, you previously said in the interview for "Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger Character Book: We're KING!!!!!!" that "For someone who finds their work to be a bother, she's a hard worker," but what about now?"

Hirakawa: Lately, Rita doesn't suppress their emotions so much in front of Morfonia anymore. They used to feel that they had to behave properly in front of Morfonia, that they couldn't let their retainer see them acting strange, but now I think they seem to recognize her as their partner. She has the utmost trust in Rita, that she will not leave their side no matter what, and that she will believe in Rita, even if they're accused of committing a crime

"Murakami-san, what do you think the two of them are like from Hymeno's point of view?"

Murakami: Hymeno's very excited that they recognize her as their friend.

Hirakawa: Are you also excited?

Murakami: Yeah. Because they're Hymeno's first friend. Hymeno lost her parents when she was young and became queen, and I don't think she had anyone she could talk to as an equal, but Rita is able to express their opinions to her. I think the reason why she invited Rita to tea in episode 30 was because she was excited that Rita, who she considers her first friend, came all the way to Ishabana. Rita's presence in Hymeno's life has grown, and a childlike feeling of happiness is building up inside her. Until now, Rita was just one of the kings, but now that they have a common enemy, they've grown closer and have become friends. I think this is a very happy relationship for Hymeno. I think Morfonia is recognized as an understanding person who is with Rita all the time, who as a friend, helps improve Rita's well being. There's a scene in episode 38 when Rita was having an idol audition, and although Hymeno doesn't often talk with the other members of the royal entourage, she was having a normal conversation with Morfonia as an equal. Hymeno was able to do that because she knows that she's a good and understanding friend. She probably met her more than other members of the king's entourage, and I think that in Hymeno's mind, Morfonia is a friend of a friend.

"On the other hand, How does Morfonia view Rita?"

Hasegawa: It's possible that she doesn't view Rita as a king. Her feelings are of parental love, rather than loyalty. They're just so cute that she can't stand it. Yuzuchin said that Morfonia would always be on Rita's side, which is the same as how I feel regarding my own parents. Of course, they're not a child (laughs), but they're her work partner, and is someone she wants to watch over all the time.

"Morfonia is also Rita's potential successor, so the relationship between the king and their retainer is quite different from that of the other countries. Gokkan has practically no people to rule over."

Hirakawa: If you think about it, it's only just the two of them.

Hasegawa: That's true.

Hirakawa: They're in a situation where they have no one to rely on but each other.

"How does Morfonia view Hymeno, the king of another country?"

Hasegawa: My own interpretation is that at first Hymeno was just like the other kings, and Morfonia honestly didn't care about her (laugh). However, when she found out that Hymeno was someone who understood Rita and became their friend, she felt happy, but she also felt like she couldn't let go of her feelings and be too pleased about it. It's kind of like the loneliness you feel when your child is about to leave your care…..But, while Hymeno may look like a selfish and troublesome person at first glance, she is in fact a kind and gentle person who is always looking out for those around her. If such a person were standing beside Rita and stirring them up, it would make Rita feel more human, and that they could live an easier life. In fact, I think they'd probably feel grateful.

"When performing with the people here, do you have any discussions about your performance or anything you need to be careful about?"

Murakami: When I'm in a scene with Yuzuyan, I try to clearly tell her, "Your spot is over here, and I'm right here." Yuzuyan's face is mostly hidden due to her costume and makeup, so her visibility is poor….Even in the scene in episode 36 where we did ballroom dancing, I said, "My hand's here. Don't worry, I'll move first."

Hirakawa: It's not just about having a performance plan, it's simply that I can't see (laughs). Even when we danced, I couldn't see her, so I had to remember her position before I could hold her hand.

Murakami: But, the only thing we talk about before acting is confirming those moves. I almost never have meetings related to acting. We both perform with what we have, and I think that brings out the best in each of us and has created the relationship we have now.

Hirakawa: The kings are just a clash of personalities, aren't they? That's why when we start talking, we all get together, or rather, we get strangely grouped together. I think it'd be better if the kings just expressed their own ideas instead of talking to each other, giving the impression that the kings were doing whatever they wanted. If we talk and try to get closer, then maybe…

Murakami: It wouldn't be interesting. We only talked about each other's roles during the body swap episode (episode 28). That episode was a great opportunity for me to learn things about each character that I didn't know before.

Hasegawa: Yuzuchin and I would talk alittle before shooting a scene between Morfonia and Rita. We both think alot about what kind of performance we want to do, and then we talk about it and make sure we have the same understanding.

Hirakawa: Ultimately, the understanding of what we want to do and what we want to convey in the scene has to align.

Hasegawa: Just don't go overboard……

Hirakawa: We're on the borderline

Hasegawa: Yeah. I remember having to decide for some important scenes.

Hirakawa: In episodes 10 and 25, regarding the scenes with just Rita and Morfonia, I'd say, "I'm thinking of doing it this way, but what about you Kasumin?" We tried it once, and if it wasn't right, we'd come to a good compromise. We also talked about the kabedon scene in episode 25. Morfonia's trying to escape from Rita's room, and at first Rita grabbed her arm and tried to hold her back, but then I thought, "Rita doesn't pull people's arms, do they?" I thought that if they did, it would give the impression that she was used to being restrained.

Hasegawa: We talked about how it'd be better if they were more clumsy.

Hirakawa: I wanted to express Rita's clumsiness due to their lack of human relationships, but I also wanted it to look cute. As a result, they ended up doing a kabedon.

Hasegawa: However, we don't always talk about the performance in detail.

Hirakawa: We don't talk about specifics like, "Let's do this at this moment," but rather about the nuance of matching the groove. When we need to pay attention to our movements, we communicate specifically to each other. Things like, "I'm going to put my hand here when I hit the wall, so be careful."

Hasegawa: For the kabedon scene, the staff behind the wall were trying to keep it together (laughs).

Murakami: They were holding back! The only scenes involving Hymeno and Morfonia was in episode 38, where they had a conversation, but that was about it…..

Hasegawa: I'd like to talk to you alittle more.

Murakami: I think I could if there was a time to visit Rita. Maybe Hymeno would ask Morfonia, "Prepare some tea" and she would respond in a slightly disgruntled voice, "Eh~?" (laughs).

Hasegawa: (in Morfonia's voice) "Is cocoa okay~?"

Murakami: (in Hymeno's voice) "Ishabana has black tea, but Gokkan's tea time is cocoa, huh? Hmmm~"

Hirakawa: I started this (laughs).

"We'd like to ask about any particularly memorable moments or scenes so far."

Hirakawa: I liked episode 10.

Hasegawa: Me too. There's the scene where Morfonia says, "I want to be with you," through the giant Moffun plushie.

Hirakawa: Rita was vulnerable for the first time…..

Hasegawa: Morfonia also stepped into Rita's mind for the first time.

Hirakawa: We were both still getting a feel for each other, but it was the moment when we tried to come out of our shells by telling each other how we really felt, and it was also the moment when our relationship started to change. After filming episode 10, Kasumin and I became closer.

Murakami: As I said before, Hymeno and Morfonia don't really interact, so it's hard to name any memorable scenes…I'd like a scene together with Morfonia by Takamina Sensei (screenwritter Takano Minato). Please! (laughs). I think episode 16 is the one that left an impression on me due to the interaction between Hymeno and Rita. Rita turned to Hymeno to get to the bottom of the murder of Karras, Rita's former king, from 15 years prior. Hymeno is a king who's full of hospitality as a doctor, so she's very happy when asked to do something for them. Furthermore, it was a big deal for Hymeno to be trusted by an equal king, and from there, she and Rita started working together to get to the root of the incident. After the truth was revealed, there's a scene at the end where Hymeno gave Rita a rare good called the "Chibi Moffun Premium," and I think that was the beginning of Hymeno's excited state of mind (laughs).

Hirakawa: She was so excited when she left the Chibi Moffun in front of Rita's room.

Murakami: She was so excited. It was her first time making a friend, so she couldn't help but be happy.

Hasegawa: That scene was great. Rita really wants the Chibi Moffun Premium, but they refused with, "I'm neutral," and won't accept the gift, so Hymeno tells them, "Then throw it away. It's garbage. It doesn't matter what you do with garbage, right?" and then leaves. Then, Rita accepts the gift and mumbles, "Thank you." I thought that Rita's understanding person had appeared.

Murakami: I'd say it was Hymeno's forceful kindness, knowing that Rita wouldn't accept it as a gift. In episode 3, which was Hymeno's main episode, there were multiple scenes where this forceful kindness is shown, and even if it doesn't appear that way on the surface, Hymeno often acts with the other person in mind. On the other hand, there's something about Rita that makes her want to do something for them, and that builds up from episode 16. In episode 30, Rita comes to Ishabana again, and they interact by inviting them to tea. As they deepened their relationship, Rita's presence within Hymeno grew. In episode 38, she was so moved by Rita's stage presence that she cried and cheered for them.

Hirakawa: That episode was amazing. The script said something like, "Rita will perform a spectacular dance," and for that one line, we had to put together a large set and have a large number of extras gather…..They filmed with four cameras, which is quite alot.

Hasegawa: We usually use alot of green screen, so it's normally one camera!

Hirakawa: I was nervous when I heard voices saying "Camera's rolling" from four different places~!

Murakami: It was much bigger than I had imagined from reading the script, and I got the sense that this is what happens when adults get serious. Going back to Hymeno in that episode, she thought Rita's dream was to become an idol and said, "I'll be the producer, you be the idol!" She can't leave Rita alone, so in true Hymeno fashion, she tries to drag Rita along in the way she wants. I think that kind of uniqueness to Hymeno came out.

Hasegawa: The ending of that episode made me happy. There's a scene where Morfonia says to Rita, "I think it's okay to be yourself in front of your friends."

Hirakawa: It was also good that there was some adlibbing. In the script, it ends with Morfonia saying "I…I like you," but Rita didn't hear it, so they said, "You were just complaining, right?," to which she replied, "It's okay if you didn't hear."

Hasegawa: It was a nice scene. Gokkan looked warm.

"Let's also ask a question unrelated to your roles. You've been calling each other by your nicknames for awhile now, but what do you usually call each other?"

Murakami: I'm often called "Marie" on set, as well as from these two. I call Hirakawa-san "Yuzuyan."

Hasegawa: I call Hirakawa-san "Yuzuchin."

Hirakawa: Hasegawa-san is "Kasumin."

Hasegawa: At the beginning of filming, when the three of us were in the dressing room, I remember asking, "What would you like to be called?"

Hirakawa: That's right! At that time, I was already calling Murakami-san Marie.

Hasegawa: I said, "Who's Marie?" (laughs). From then on, I also called her Marie.

Hirakawa: I also asked Hasegawa-san, "What should I call you?" and she said, "People often call me Kasumin," so I decided I'd call her that too.

Murakami: When we first met, I called you "Yuzuki-chan." I think I said, "Yuzuki-chan, you're good at remembering directions."

Hirakawa: I also used "Erica-chan"! Uwah…..it doesn't feel right anymore (laughs). It feels like, "Wow"

Murakami: It's nostalgic (laughs).

"We'd like to know about any unexpected aspects of the other two that you've discovered between photo shoots or in your private life."

Hirakawa: Since we're always together, we have a common understanding.

Hasegawa: Ummm~, Hirakawa Yuzuki actually likes glasses.

Hirakawa: I love them!

Hasegawa: Those who know me know that I like glasses, but Yuzuchin also likes them.

Hirakawa: When Marie makes a joke, she gives a look that says, "I'm going to make a joke now, so please laugh."

Murakami: Ah~! I only get silly in front of people like Kaku-san, who definitely pick up my jokes (laughs). Yuzuyan will also definitely respond to them. She accepts them so willingly, that I end up getting carried away. For Kasumi-san, there was something strange in the book she was reading the other day. It was called "The Complete History of Sapiens."

Hasegawa: Ao-tan, who plays Yanma, told me, "It's interesting."

Murakami: The fans probably didn't know that we're reading such books, huh?

Hirakawa: Ah! Speaking of Kasumin, she really likes patterned items, like on clothes and such.

Hasegawa: That's true, I might have alot of things.

Hirakawa: You also like embroidery, don't you?

Hasegawa: I love embroidery! The cushions in my house have embroidery on them. I never thought about it until you mentioned it.

"Finally, we'd like to get a title suggestion for this Character Book."

Murakami: "Moffun and the Delightful Friends"?

Hirakawa: "The Bonds Connected by Moffun"

Hasegawa: That's good, that's good! We didn't take any pictures with him, but it looks like Racules will be making an appearance, so "Racules" should also be included.

Murakami: The relationship between these three people is centered around Rita.

Hirakawa: Then, how about, "The Miracle Connected by Rita"?……I thought about it, but it's not a good idea not to include the names of Hymeno and Morfonia.

Hasegawa: I hope it can give off a feeling of taking a step towards friendship.

Hirakawa: I think we've given you alot of hints, so please come up with a great title! (laughs).

Kaku So x Kamura Mami x Masato Yano

"Since this is the long awaited roundtable discussion, please introduce yourself with a role that you're not playing. We've prepared a lottery with the names of all the characters, so please draw and tell us about the role written on it."

Kaku: I got…..Racules? If I were to describe with one saying the character of Racules Husty, played by Yano-chan, it'd be that he's charismatically evil.

Kamura: Oh~ (applauding).

Kaku: His fans are extremely enthusiastic, which is understandable. When he makes an appearance, the atmosphere changes. Viewers often say, "It gives off the atmosphere of a night time drama." I get the impression that he spices up and enhances this production.

Yano: That makes me happy! Now, I'll introduce Suzume Dybowski. She's the cute younger sister of Kaguragi Dybowski and is also a schemer. Also, in episode 20, there was the wedding scene with Racules, and I thought that wedding dress looked really good on her.

Kamura: Yay~! (laughs).

Yano: Suzume said she liked Racules in the first chapter (episodes 1-26), but behind the scenes she was working for Kaguragi, I also wasn't sure, did she really have feelings for Racules or not? However, in the second chapter, there are many depictions that make you feel that it's real love. The scenes involving Racules and Suzume are always abit embarrassing for me, like when we look at each other (laughs).

Kamura: Next, I'll introduce Kaguragi. He's the lord of Toufu, but you can say he's a character in the gray area…..

Kaku: He's not very hero like (laughs).

Kamura: Right, there's a reverse side. But, he loves his sister, and he loves Toufu. He's a very cool king who dirties himself and lies for the sake of his country.

Kaku: Thank you so much.

Kamura: It's wonderful that he's able to tell lies and keep with it. King-Ohger is a show for children, and perhaps it should be portrayed that it's not good to lie. But, everything he does is for the good of the country and his people, and there's no lie in that. I like that he has a strong core and doesn't hesitate. Lying is part of being a "man" that ultimately makes them feel cool.

"Next, regarding the other two, please tell us about the differences and similarities between their role and themselves."

Kaku: Yano-chan is a very playful person. We joke around with each other between takes. He's also very funny. That's one of the things that separate him from Racules.

Yano: There are times when I feel like I'm just screwing around (laughs). If I only give off the impression of my role, people will think I'm a scary person.

Kaku: Suzume is the opposite of Racules, and is always smiling, which is something she shares with Kamura-san. But, you're not a schemer, right?

Kamura: I'm not (laughs).

Yano: I don't know. A schemer wouldn't admit, "I'm a schemer" (laughs). But my intuition tells me that Kamura-san and Suzume are close. (to Kamura) What do you think about Kaguragi and Kakkun (Kaku)?

Kamura: I wonder…(thinks for a moment). As her older brother, Kaguragi is always kind to Suzume-chan. I think they're similar. I think there's a sense of security.

Kaku: The only time Kaguragi shows real kindness is when it comes to Suzume. He always seems to be thinking about how to trick other people.

"Kamura-san, do you think there are any similarities between Yano-san and Racules?"

Kamura: Any similarities…

Yano: Well, it's a difficult question because you probably don't even know that much about what kind of person Masato Yano usually is.

Kamura: That's true, I don't really know Yano-san that well privately.

Kaku: All three of us, Chiwata Yuhei-kun, who plays Shiokara, and Hasegawa Kasumi-san, who plays Morfonia, all cast members in our 30s, went out to eat wanko soba (small bowls of soba eaten quickly, is immediately refilled, and repeated).

"Wanko soba?!"

Yano: That's the kind of reaction we get (laughs). It's not simply, "We went out to eat soba."

Kamura: I'm from Iwate Prefecture, so a conversation started of, "What kind of specialties are from there?"

Kaku: We were all excited saying, "Wanko soba is famous," "I've never had it before" and "Alright, let's go everyone!" That day, we ate wanko soba, walked around Yokohama Chinatown, and had our fortunes told.

Yano: I didn't enjoy it properly. I ate way too much wanko soba… (laughs).

Kaku & Kamura: (laughs).

Yano: My stomach was so full I couldn't think straight. I think I ate about 130 bowls. Kakkun ate about 150 bowls, right?

Kaku: I could've eaten more if I wanted to, and I was totally fine! That was a fun day. It's become a good memory.

"From Yano-san's point of view, do you see any similarities between Kaku-san, Kamura-san and the characters they play?"

Yano: Kaguragi's alittle scary, and I don't know what he's thinking behind that smile. But, is Kakkun easy to understand? (laughs). I think it shows on his face. Also, Kaguragi is kind only to Suzume, but Kakkun is kind to everyone. As for Kamura-san, I don't really know what kind of person she is, but I thought she wasn't that far off from Suzume…but now that I look at her face, I don't recognize her anymore.

Kamura: Eh? Why's that?

Yano: No, I think it resembles Suzume after all. Kamura-san is always smiling, just like Suzume, but I don't know what she's actually thinking (laughs).

"Continuing, we'd like to ask you about your perception of each other's characters. First, how do you think Kaguragi sees Racules?"

Kaku: At this point in time, there are some things I don't understand either. Racules, who was thought to have died after falling off a cliff in episode 20, reappeared in episode 34, but in reality, I'm wondering if Kaguragi actually knew that Racules was alive and had been colluding with him all along or not.

Yano: I'm definitely curious.

Kaku: Even in the interactions between the two of them so far, it's not clear how far in advance their actions were based. In the beginning, I thought that Kaguragi was playing political games with Racules for Toufu's sake, but I have a strong feeling that it's not the only reason. Furthermore, I was also aware that Suzume's love for Racules was just her acting for the sake of the country, but as the episode progressed, I came to believe that she was serious (laughs). I think Kaguragi's feelings are that he's shocked because she's his precious little sister, and he hates the idea of Racules and Suzume getting married, but he also wants to congratulate them. I can't help but feel that his feelings are similar to those of a father watching over his daughter who is about to get married.

Kamura: Fa~ther!

"Yano-san, what do you think Racules thinks about Kaguragi and Suzume? By the way, do you know what will happen next?"

Yano: Somewhat……

Kamura: Hmmm?~

Kaku: (in a monotone voice) What's gonna happen?

Yano: No, no, I can't say (laughs).

Kaku: You always keep your lips sealed.

Yano: People tend to say that, but the more I say, "I don't know," the more they think I definitely know (laughs).

Kaku: Maybe it's because of the way you sometimes smile with a sence of sarcasm? When I asked him if he knows what'll happen, he says, "No, I don't know. How much do you know?" When I replied, "I heard this happens," he replied, (with a blank expression) "Ah, I see" (laughs). I think Yano-chan probably knows what's going on!

Yano: But I really didn't know anything about Suzume either. When I was told that although he was holding Kaguragi's sister hostage, she was officially his fiancee, I was surprised and said, "They're getting married?!" (laughs). I often act without knowing what'll happen next. Come to think of it, the ring that Racules put on Suzume's left ring finger in episode 20 was actually important.

Kamura: It's a key item!

Kaku: Was that a calculated move by Racules in anticipation for the future?

Kamura: When we were filming the wedding, Yano-san said, "Isn't this ring pretty important? I said, "Absolutely not!" But, in the end, it turned out just as Yano-san predicted (laughs).

"The ring was an important item, since it was thanks to it that the kings were able to return to Chikyu from Earth. What does Racules, who entrusted the ring to her, think about Suzume? Is there actually love…?

Kamura: I want to hear it!

Kaku: What does he think of my Suzume?!

Yano: I don't think he dislikes her. Well, I don't know if Racules has feelings to like people or not…

Kaku: It sounds like you're thinking if he's qualified to love someone.

Yano: There were also opinions on SNS that he may have been drawn towards Vedalia, who appeared in the spin off drama "The Secret of King Racules" currently being distributed on YouTube, and was working at Shugoddam's research institute…but what do you think? In the future, I think it'll be an interesting point to see how Racules interacts with various people, including Suzume.

Kaku: I wish he was alittle more "lovey dovey."

Kamura: I know, right~

Yano: But, in episode 22, there's a flashback scene where Suzume sleeps on a futon in front of Racules's throne. Maybe it's Racules's way of expressing his love for her that he's allowing that behavior. If he felt it was a nuisance, all he had to do was order someone to, "Take her away."

"It was interesting that Suzume described that scene as a "bedtime story." Kamura-san, what do you think Suzume thinks of Racules and Kaguragi?"

Kamura: When I was given the role of Suzume, I was told that she loves her brother, the country of Toufu, and that she doesn't dislike Racules. At first, that was my intention, but as I played the role more and more, I began to think, "I love Racules!" (laughs). There are similarities between Racules and Kaguragi, so it's not surprising that Suzume loves them. I'm not sure if what's in Racules's heart has been revealed yet though. On the other hand, although she still loves her brother, I think Suzume also thinks that working with Racles will ultimately benefit her brother.

"Kaguragi, Suzume and Racules all have alot of suspenseful scenes where they're trying to expose each other, but is there anything you keep in mind when performing together in confrontational scenes?"

Kaku: For scenes with Racules, I try to be conscious of overacting when I'm bluffing, and dropping my tone when I'm talking about something more serious. Also, I try to look as cool as possible! (laughs).

Kamura: You're so cool! The atmosphere between the two of us is different, isn't it?

Kaku: I try to make scenes with Suzume look as humorous as possible, as it's funny to see Kaguragi being pushed around. There's a scene in episode 15 where Suzume says, "I love you, Racules-sama!" and Kaguragi begins to hyperventilate. It wasn't written in the script, but I thought it'd be funnier if I played my character in such a stressed state. I think he feels that way because he dotes on his little sister. I enjoy the scenes with Suzume because I can have fun with her.

Yano: I don't have a specific plan for what I do, but I want scenes with Kaguragi to have some "weight" to them in the work of King-Ohger. Also, the scenes where I interact with Kakkun I can really feel emotionally. There are many scenes with Gira, but Taisei Sakai, who plays Gira, is still young, so I have a strong desire to watch over him and take him under my wings. But, when I'm performing with Kakkun, I have a sense of trust that no matter what I toss at him, he'll always react, so I can concentrate everything into the performance.

Kaku: (has a satisfied smile on his face)

Yano: (looks at Kaku) A smile of satisfaction!

Kamura: It really is a satisfied smile (laughs). What I pay attention to…I often have to worry about my brother and Racules, so I guess I'm just trying to, "Give it my all!"

Kaku: We need to raise the tension

Kamura: In episode 15, the first time I participated in filming, I was so close to Racules that I was hugging him. At that time, I really felt like my heart was going to jump out of my mouth (laughs).

Yano: You were nervous. You also had alot of lines.

Kamura: I was under alot of pressure on the first day. But I knew I couldn't give up, so I just gave it my all.

Yano: I thought it must've been difficult, but I was desperately trying to hold back my laughter (laughs). Just the thought of, "Suzume is approaching me, and getting closer!" is funny….

Kamura: Moreover, on the first day, we were filming on a set. Usually we film with a green screen background because of the CG.

Yano: Unlike the openness of a green screen, the space on set was cramped.

Kamura: That may be why I felt a difference in atmosphere on the set, which made me even more nervous. When we finished filming, I was drenched in sweat.

Yano: I see. I wish I could have helped you relax more.

Kamura: But, it was also the first time for me to hug someone I'd never met before, so it was good experience. In the scenes with Kaguragi, I still give it my all, but sometimes Suzume acts like a queen, and at those times I was instructed not to be too harsh and to act cute. So, I try to keep that in mind.

Yano: For me, I'm on the verge of grinning during scenes with Suzume. It's funny, but it's also really embarrassing. Doesn't Suzume just give off the feeling of, "Racules-sama~❤️"? When I play Racules, I get the feeling that he's apart of me, but that Racules is embarrassed.

Kaku: Racules is also shy.

Yano: "It's not Racules-sama, don't call me Racules-sama or anything like that…" (laughs).

Kamura: How cute~!

Yano: The scene where I put your ring on during the wedding almost made me start grinning (laughs).

Kaku: You did your best to endure it, huh?

Yano: I wish I could interact with Suzume in a less serious situation…

Kamura: Yeah~ I think it'd be fun.

Yano: The scene mentioned earlier where she sleeps in front of the throne was also fun. When I play the role of Racules, my shoulders tense up and I get tired, so I tend to act out when the cameras aren't rolling. I make alot of strange faces on set (laughs).

Kaku: It's true, even while we were getting ready, the cameras were rolling, and when we looked into the monitor, we could see him making strange faces (laughs).

Yano: I have to mess around to maintain a balance. That's why I hope there'll be more funny scenes with Suzume.

Kamura: On the contrary, Suzume always has alot of funny scenes, so I was nervous about the Toufu scenes in episode 37. This was the first time in this production where all the scenes involved were serious, so I wondered, "Am I doing the right thing?"

"Looking back on the past, please tell us about any scenes with either all three, or just two of you, that left a particularly strong impression on you."

Yano: It has to be the first time all three of us filmed together…

Kamura: Episode 15 right? I really liked that one!

Kaku: But, is that the only scene where the three of us were together?

Yano: There was also the three of us at the wedding ceremony. Although it wasn't all three, the scene where Racules and Kaguragi talk about Suzume for the first time left an impression on me.

Kaku: Ah, episode 12.

Yano: I like that scene, where they stood back to back and talked without looking at each other. When Kaguragi was reporting to Racules about Jeramie, who was still a mystery at the time, the subject of Suzume came up, and Kaguragi changed his tone of voice and asked, "Is Suzume doing well?" Racules replied, "Of course. But, depending on your attitude, that could change."

Kaku: I'm sure the viewers were surprised with, "Kaguragi has a younger sister, and she's also being held hostage by Racules?!"

Yano: I was surprised too (laughs). I remember thinking that her name sounded like the bird (sparrow). I later realized that it comes from the vespinae wasp.

Kamura: How interesting~ (laughs).

Yano: When we were filming that scene, everyone was wondering who would play Suzume, even though she would eventually make her appearance.

Kamura: I see!

Kaku: She made her first appearance in episode 15, where she suddenly hugs Racules…But, there's also the scene where she vows, "Let us dirty our hands together and defend Toufu. Brother!" She is indeed Kaguragi's sister, and she showed that she's not crazy about love, but is committed to her country.

Kamura: I really liked the part in episode 18, where Kaguragi appears in front of Racules and takes the OhgerLance and OhgerCrown. It was an intense development that revealed all the foreshadowing of Kaguragi's actions.

Kaku: Toufu's theme song, "It's a Banquet Ohger!" was playing. In episode 18, it was funny to see Kaguragi squeak "Gii Gii" when Suzume orders him with, "Show your respect for Racules-sama and pretend to be a rhino beetle."

Yano: I've seen alot of onomatopoeia in the scripts, like "Gii Gii." Especially recently, they seem to be getting more and more frequent…I guess screenwriter Takamina-san likes them.

"Do you have a favorite line as Suzume?"

Kamura: What would it be…..

Yano: I always have the image of her saying, "Racules-sama~❤️"

Kamura: Well then, "Racules-sama~❤️" it is (laughs). Just now, I thought of the scene in episode 33, where Suzume sticks the Ohger CrownLance under the floor of the throne to move Caucasuskabuto Castle. I like the line, "If that is your will, I'll make it all come true!" because it shows that she's determined. Especially since there's always so many comedic scenes.

"Kamura-san and Yano-san seem to be especially interested in doing funny scenes, but are there any scenes that the three of you would like to do in the future?"

Yano: I really want to do something comedic. You want to play around too, right?

Kamura: I want to, even if it's in a spinoff!

Yano: If we can joke around there, we might not have anything to say off camera (laughs). Also, a scene of Racules being bullied by Kaguragi and Suzume…that'd be good. He'd keep being served food endlessly and forced to eat. His body would swell up and he wouldn't be able to arm himself with the royal armor (laughs).

Kamura: That's good. I want to see it, right now!

"Kamura-san, are you interested in trying action scenes?"

Kamura: No, I'm afraid I'll just be an inconvenience…(bitter smile)

Yano: Kamura-san, you can move, can't you?

Kaku: However, it seems it'd be difficult since Suzume's costume is a kimono.

Kamura: That's right. However, in episode 15, I was about to pull a katana out of its sheath, so I thought there might be a scene where she'd do something with the katana when the time came, but so far nothing's happened.

Kaku: That katana, I was wondering if it had been passed down in the Dybowski family from generation to generation, but I guess not?

Yano: I wonder if there'll be a scene where Suzume slashes at Racules with that katana.

Kaku: Racules hasn't had any action scenes since episode 20. It can't be helped that he left the show at the time of that episode…

Yano: That's why I'm looking forward to seeing future action scenes where he doesn't transform. I think a sword fight with Gira will happen someday, and I think Sakai is getting better at it.

Kaku: In episodes 32 and 33, I experienced the production directed by Sakamoto Koichi, who's famous for his action direction.

Yano: Watching those two episodes, I was impressed with how well Sakai could move. In the scene in episode 20, where he confronts Racules in the trial by combat, it looked like he was having a hard time with some of the moves he wasn't good at. I co starred with Sakai in the drama "Shinyu wa Akujo" which was also his debut work, and right after that we started filming in King-Ohger, so we've been on the same set for a long time. I've been watching over him for about a year now, and he seems to be growing properly.

"As a viewer, I feel like I'd love to see Racules fight alongside someone."

Yano: That'd be nice. I'd love to fight with Gira for a given reason, or Kaguragi, with our backs against each other.

Kamura: It'd be cool if that happens.

Yano: It'd also be nice to see Kaguragi and Suzume get involved in the action scenes. Suzume would be fighting with a katana, but when she finds herself in a pinch, Kaguragi comes tackling in to help.

Kaku: It's not hard to imagine Kaguragi springing into action and saying, "What are you doing to my little sister?!" (laughs).

"We'd like to ask you about your private lives. Are there any aspects that only the other knows?"

Kaku: Yano-chan has been working hard on muscle training to gain weight. After losing weight for another production, he's not just trying to gain the weight back, he's trying to gain it back with muscle.

Yano: I lost around 10 kg (23 lbs)…..

Kaku: To be honest, he's quite macho. I do strength training myself, and I have a set menu made that'd surprise you.

Kamura: I don't know if I'm allowed to say this…

Yano: Is it something bad? (laughs).

Kamura: I'll say it! There's the cast's LINE group, and Yano-san sends us some playful photos (laughs).

Kaku: That's right! Seeing them, I think he must be bored on set. Yano-chan often films alone.

"In response, the general reaction was…"

Yano: They don't check them often. It makes me think that the kids of today aren't interested (laughs). As for Sakai, he probably hasn't even seen them. During this time, I contacted Sakai and asked, "Are you free?" I thought I'd invite him to dinner if he had time. Then, I received a reply saying, "Please invite me again." (Japanese gesture often used to decline a date)

Kamura: You're kidding?!

Yano: There was no, "I'm in the middle of filming right now" or anything like that. Even though I didn't say, "I love you" I feel like I was dumped…..

Kaku: He can be direct, so it's a shame that we understood his response (laughs).

Yano: Oh yeah, I'd love to mention this too, when I film alone, Kamura-san also stays behind to watch over me.

Kamura: But, the other day, I stayed behind thinking that there was just one more shot left, but then I realized I was wrong and said, "Ah, there's still more filming to do? Well then, I'm going home" (laughs).

Yano: At that time, Morioka Yutaka-san, who plays the role of Douga, was also there, and I overheard him saying, "Yano-chan, you're almost done, so I'll watch over you until you've finished." Then, just one minute later, he started leaving and said, "Good work today!" I was surprised and said, "Eh?!" (laughs).

Kaku: (laughs). In the show, we have a very tense relationship, but we get along well when filming! Please look forward to the second chapter!!

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camlovesjace · 8 months ago

Text

GHOST RIDER, modern Jacexoc!fem

SUMMARY: Jacaerys had been acting weirdly, going out many nights and coming back in the mornings, Cellys is suspecting he was cheating...but the truth was far away worst. WARNING: violence, cheating suspicion, use of bad words, murdering, graphic descriptions (also, writer is not an english native, had patience pls)

Once again, he was gone. He had slip out of the bed at midnight and didn't come back, as usual lately. Cellys was worried, freaking out was a most clear description, her friends had talk with her, saying he was probably sneaking around with some other girl and that she should dump his ass away from her before he break her heart deeper or found him red handed. That thought made her shiver, she could barely think of it without feeling the knot forming on her throat.

Jace. Her Jace. Sneaking around with other girl?

It sounded so unrealistic, but nothing else could explain his behavior. He always arrived home in the mornings, tired and exhausted. His abstinence in home was like an empty place without solace, and she didn't realized she was getting distant when he was around.

She used to look at him, she notices everything he does or don't does.

He looked disturbed, his mind anywhere else but not there.

Then she heard the door opening, his lazy steps entering in the apartment, the sun was shining with it´s first rays of golden, it was a constant reminder of the day embracing the night. She pretended to be fall asleep, covering her back with the sheets and blankets, she heard his soft gasps of tiredness, he was coming to the bedroom.

He walked in, his presence itself was relieving, but it didn´t made her felt better. The idea of him in the arms of someone else, with his hands touching other skin, his lips kissing someone else...his love being torned apart from her, it was killing her.

His weight get into the bed, he was moving quietly but his lazy movements made the mattress move up and down slightly.

"Babe..." he murmured, his voice was low and hoarse but she didn't opened her eyes, trying to look as slept as possible. She could felt his hazel gaze on her back, then his arms wrapped her waist under covers as he cling behind her, like a hurted dog.

He buried his face on the back of her neck, his nose smelling the sweet aroma of her hair, a smell that always bring him home. She could smell a strong burning smell, like the smoke of a bonfire. The way his arms felt so heavy around her showed her how tired he truly was, and once again, that knot on her throat felt tighter than ever.

She broke down, crying as his warm body held hers, her soft almost inaudible cries hitted him like a punch in the guts.

"Hey, hey...what´s wrong?" he whispered, sitting in bed and turning her to face him, his grip was firm but gentle, seeing her eyes covered in tears all of them pouring down her cheeks -like if she were holding them for so long- while her chest moved up and down quickly in a painted breathe.

A wave of protectiveness washed over him, as he pulled her into his arms deeper but she broke the hug, getting away from him in bed. Then the realization made him felt sick.

"No" he spoke, his tone sounded more hard than he would've wanted, but into his chest he only felt guilty. Guilty for making her feel like this, for making her think he was doing that to her. She the love of his life, the best thing that's ever been his and the most precious he has.

"Do not do this worse" she whispers, trying to clean her cheeks but it was useless, tears were locked in for too much weeks and now they were scapink in a tsunami of emotions that made her stomach twist in pain "Jace, i know...i know-"

"No" he interrupted her, he moved quickly over her, holding her wrist and pinning her on the bed, his eyes held a plea on them "You need to believe me, please, please, my darling" he begged, desperately.

Knowing the truth would be dangerous for her, but he knew staying by his side would be much more. He didn't wanted her to leave, to go away from him and never see her again, to never heard her laughter or to feel her warmth on the bed every time he need solace from the dark curse on his soul.

"Aren't you? Tell me you're not doing it, tell me that even if it is a lie" she says, her lips on a soft pout, her heart was sinking on her stomach. He looked down at her, still pinning her body under his, not wanting to let go.

"I'm not! Cellys, i'm fucking not" he shouted, but his own tears made his confession sound weaker, not because it wasn't true but because he knew he was being selfish. He wanted her to stay, he told himself he would be able to protect her, to not hurt her in the path...but he was doing it by lying to her "I would rather die than betray you that way, you heard me? i would rather to be a damn rotting corpse buried in the darkest place of the world and the hell before hurting you like that" his tears were pouring down his cheeks, his grip on her arms tighten but not enough to make her feel pain.

She felt completely devastated, torned by the suspicion of his cheating and his sincere voice when he said he would never, she wanted to believe him so bad. She wanted to say she choose to trust in their love, but what if she was wrong? what if he lied? once again.

What if...?

It´s been a while since they talked, Cellys was out with a female friend on Verona, for the long weekend. But he knew it was an excuse to stay away from him, from home. She didn't believed him, and he understood why, he was lying after all. But not in the way she thought he was lying, her suspicions of cheating made him felt offended, but how could he blame her? He was, in fact, being distant and having an erratic behavior.

But there he was, sitting in a dark place in the middle of nowhere. The blood slipping through his fingers, the bone still noticeable under his knuckles. His body was sore, he could feel the heat of the fire around his neck. Even if his own fire could not hurt him he still felt the wound.

The sun was still hiding, extending his course.

The man sat next to him, in the bench, his pale skin was similar to the white tone of his bones, that were covered in an orange and blue flame.

"It is done" he announced, not disappointed but neither proud. The dead body of a man behind them, his soul was lost...as well his own.

"I know it's fucking done" Jace says, his voice was lifeless and rough, like if it carried a demoniac tone with it. The sun started to rise, the golden color was heavenly, and it reminded him to Cellys. Her sweet smile, her gentle touch, how it was to feel her breath against his neck when he held her.

He was losing her...

"Be careful in the way you spoke at me, child" the man says, the rage on it was heavy but Jace was not afraid of him, he was mad too. This was ruining his entire life, he wanted to give up.

He would rather die but not let his girl to think he would cheat on her like a bastard. No when he would fight with the devil himself to protect her and her feelings.

"I don´t wanna keep doing this, i wanna go home..." he says but the man only laughs.

"You think you have an option?" he mocked, then his gaze darkener "if you don't do what i say, i guess i must start to give you reason to..."

Jacaerys felt his skin burning as the sun rises more and more, he gasped in pain when his flesh started to cover his bones back, his fingertips found his jaw when the skeleton under was being replaced by skin and muscles, the fire dying.

"What...do you mean?" he asked, breathless. The smell of smoke burned his nostrils, it was the smell of his flesh killing the fire that was around his bones. The process was painful but more bearable than the first time he was turned into this monster.

"The girl" the man says, a smile pulling of the corner of his lips "She is pretty, isn't she? An angel"

A shiver ran down his spine with that protective instinct over him he had felt so many times before, but this time was much stronger than ever.

"Touch her and you're dead" Jace threatened but it sounded like a pathetic and useless warning in the ears of the devil.

"Oh, boy, i'm already are"

dt; @nebulamorada <3

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ateriblewriter · 1 year ago

Text

Snuggle Day (c.c)

Requested: no

Warnings: mentions of sexy times (nothing really descriptive), nothing else I believe

Masterlist

Enjoy! Let me know what y’all think! Anything is welcome!

"Cole," you whisper, brushing aside a stray piece of hair that had fallen in front of his face, prompting him to stir slightly. His bare arms are still wrapped around you, pulling you in closer. The two of you were still sparsely dressed from the night before.

"Come on, lover, I need to get going if I'm ever going to make it back by the time you boys get home." You very much wanted to let your sleepy boyfriend continue in his slumber. But you had wanted to get your training run in before it got too hot outside, and you didn't want to do it anymore. Plus, it's a thirteen-mile day!"

You had been running ever since you were little, a run for fun. Starting with kids runs when you were younger, evolving to cross country and track when you were in high school. You ran your first half marathon during your first year of college, completing a full 26.2-mile marathon the following year.

"I think you should skip your long run today and stay here in bed with me. I can think of a better way to get your training in." Cole's words were muffled when he nuzzled his face into your chest.

"Come on, darling, the boys are probably already waiting for you. Plus, we can always take a shower or something when we both get back." You laughed at your lover boy's insistence on staying in bed. You didn’t want to leave either, but if you both got the things you needed to do out of the way first, then you could pick up where you had left off.

"Or, or, hear me out on this. We stay here while everyone else goes out. We can have a little fun." His eyebrows bounced up and down as he said the last bit, alluding to something more intimate taking place once the other boys staying at the home left. "We can still take that shower and have even more fun in there. And then we can just snuggle for the rest of the day."

"But we have to..." You trailed off, trying to come up with a good enough excuse not to give into the temptation to take a day off of training for your respective sports and spend the day together instead, but nothing was coming to mind.

"Nope. No. You hesitated, and now you can't get up because you are my prisoner for the day. And we are doing what I want to do." Cole, with his arms still wrapped around you, now swung one of his legs over yours, successfully trapping you.

"Okay." You admitted defeat, still not being able to come up with a good enough excuse, and gave in to him. What was one day? You could go on your run tomorrow.

Cole placed his hands on either side of of your face, peppering it with kisses. Grabbing his phone he sent some made up story as to why he wasn’t going to be making it in for training session that morning.

The two of you then had some of the best slow and lazy sex, which was the complete opposite of what was performed in the shower when the party was moved in there after the boys returned to the house.

“Hey do you want to get some snacks? I’ll set up the fort and queue the movie up?” Finishing up in the bathroom, you step out of the bathroom to admire your shirtless boyfriend. God he was beautiful, especially with the various love bites you left on him.

Cole knew once he left the room he was going to be subjected to the chirping of his friends. He let their comments roll of his shoulder.

“You’re just jealous you’re not getting any.” The boy in love smirked showing off the hickies with pride.

He grabbed the plate full of fruits and the of popcorn and brought them back to the room where you had taken all the blankets and all the pillows on the floor arranged to make a small fort.

For the rest of the day, the two of you were tangled up in each other watching movies, eat snacks and talking about anything and everything that came to mind. It was a nice and relaxing day spent together. At some point during a viewing of Toy Story 2, you managed to fall asleep.

“I love you, my beautiful girl.” Cole kissed the top of your head before turning his attention back to the movie playing in the laptop.

#cole caufield #cole caufield blurb #cole caufield x reader #nhl imagine #nhl blurb #nhl imagine

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sena-seastar · 4 months ago

Text

The Dragon's Gold

Chapter Thirteen

Pairing: Aegon II Targaryen x Aerys Reyne (male oc)

Summary: Aerys Reyne, son of Naerys Targaryen, the second-born daughter of King Viserys and Queen Aemma, has been best friends with Aegon since childhood. As boys, they had been inseparable. Wherever one boy was, it wasn't long before the other came running behind him. That was until forbidden desires of the heart forced a wedge between them. After the death of his grandsire, King Viserys, Aerys finds himself torn between two sides: stand by his oldest friend or stand by the only mother he has ever known.

Warning: descriptions of burns and other injuries

A/n: There may be medical inaccuracies, so I apologize in advance for that. As always, dialogue in italics means that the characters are speaking in high valyrian. I was just too lazy to attempt to translate it. No beta, so I apologize for any grammar and spelling mistakes.

Aerys

Agana descended from the sky with a painful-sounding call. The noise pained Aerys more than the burns he had received at Rook’s Rest. He turned his head, observing the messy, hastily bandaged wounds. He had been offered milk of the poppy, but Aerys had declined—something he was sorely regretting now as the pain steadily crept up on him. It wasn’t the actual burns that hurt so much as it was the skin around it that was burned less severely. The more severe burns on his shoulder and arm still felt numb. He could feel a slight warmth, but that was it.

Agana dropped to the ground with a heavy thud. Aerys groaned; the pain in his arm flared as his body jerked forward. He kept his right arm clutched tightly to his chest as he struggled to lift himself off his saddle. Painful whimpers escaped his throat with every move he made. Aerys had no choice but to slide off of the side of Agana’s body as he had done at Rook’s Rest. He did not believe he would be able to climb down with only one arm. He kept his knees bent, trying to ease the shock of his jump. He stumbled but was able to steady himself before he could fall.

Aerys looked around, watching as the dragon keepers made their way towards them. Their eyes widened as they observed the silver dragon’s wounds. The distress on their faces was evident. It made sense. The dragon keepers worship the dragons. They see them as gods.

To see one of their gods return in such a broken state must have filled them with overwhelming despair. He shifted uncomfortably as their eyes shifted onto him. They looked at him with such loathing it made him feel ill. They must hate him. They must believe he is not worthy of being bonded to such a beautiful creature. In that, perhaps they were right. Agana was only injured because of him. The silver beauty deserved much better than him.

Agana trilled, trying to get his attention. He turned to her, watching as she moved her head closer to him. Aerys lowered his head, resting it against the side of her face.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized again.

No matter how many times he said it, it never felt like enough. How could words ever be enough to make up for the pain she had endured? Agana called to him. The sound gave him some comfort. She pulled away, growling at the dragon keepers who approached them. Aerys rubbed a hand over the scales on her neck, calming her down.

Aerys led her back to her cave, himself. He stayed with her, rubbing a comforting hand over her snout, lulling her to sleep. The searing pain in his arm was becoming even more challenging to endure, but he did it for her.

“Lord Reyne!” A shaky voice called out to him.

Areys turned his head, watching the unknown Hightower knight cautiously move towards the cave. The man stopped, standing a couple of feet away from the gate. Terror filled the man’s face as his eyes observed Agana.

“What is it?” Aerys asked impatiently, wishing for the man to go away.

The man stared at Agana for another moment before flinching. He quickly turned his head towards Aerys.

“The lord hand has ordered me to inform you that they have returned to the city.”

Aerys’ eyes widened. Aegon was here. He stood to his feet. Agana tried to raise her head, but Aerys pressed a hand against her snout. He leaned down, resting his head against hers.

“You must stay,” he replied sorrowfully. “I will return as soon as I can.”

Agana whined but remained still. Her body was too exhausted and in too much pain for her to move around. It broke Aerys’ heart to leave her in such a state.

“Rest now, Agana.”

He rubbed his hand over her scales one last time before turning away. His eyes filled with tears as she let out distressed chirps, trying to call him back to her. Aerys clenched his fist, trying desperately to ignore every fiber of his being that was telling- screaming at him to go to her side.

Aerys returned to the red keep, escorted by the four Hightower knights Ser Criston had sent to retrieve him. The trip had not been nearly as quick as Aerys would have liked. As he made his way through the city, he quickly noticed the palpable uneasiness and fear among the smallfolk as they eyed him warily and whispered to each other. He could not blame them. He had heard of the horrid display Ser Criston had put on for them as he made his way through the city.

The dragons were the symbol of House Targaryen, his mother’s house. They were the true power and strength behind their family; they would have been lost without them. To present Melyes’ head as if it were nothing more than some hunting prize ... it was a terrible ignominy. Aerys was glad he had not been there to witness it. The thought of it made him ill and filled his heart with a great uneasiness. The people believed the dragons to be gods and the Targaryens, by extension. They believed them to be invincible. Ser Criston had just proved to them that they were not.

Aerys pushed past the small team of maesters who were awaiting his return in the outer courtyard.

“Lord Reyne, please!” They called out, running behind him.

The man paid them no mind. He had to get back to Aegon. He needed to know if he had survived the journey. Aerys had been unable to ride by Aegon’s side, as he had to fly with Agana back to the Dragonpit. The last time he had seen Aegon, they were placing his broken body into a wooden box. Ser Criston insisted that the king’s body had to remain hidden. The sight of it had made Aerys’ stomach lurch.

Even the memory of it now made him feel like he was going to spill what little food sat in his stomach. Aegon appeared almost dead, his body lying so still in that awful wooden box that looked like a casket. Aerys shook his head, trying to clear his mind of the memory. He had to believe Aegon would be alright. Otherwise, Aerys did not know how he would be able to carry on.

“Lord Reyne, please wait!” One of the maesters cried out, grasping onto his uninjured arm.

Though Aerys quickly slipped away before he could get a firm grip on him. He hurried around the corner, eager to reach Aegon. The doors of Aegon's room were wide open. His kingsguard stood post by the door. They turned their heads, watching him as he approached. Aerys did not give them enough time to shuffle out of the way, pushing his way through them.

The first thing his eyes fell upon was the two silent sisters who lurked in the corner of the room. His breath quickened, and his body broke out into a cold sweat. Why were they here? Aerys wanted to scream at them- order them to leave. Aegon would not die. Their presence was not needed or wanted.

Aemond stood at the foot of the bed. Aerys rushed to his side, pushing the man out of the way. This was all his fault, Aerys thought. He acted hastily, and now Aegon was paying the price for it.

A much larger team of maesters crowded around Aegon's body, making it difficult to get a clear view of him. Then, one of them moved to retrieve something. Aerys let out a short gasp as his eyes observed the severity of Aegon’s injuries. They had stripped him of his armor, exposing his charred, mangled flesh.

Aerys’ heart raced painfully in his chest, and his throat tightened. Blood pounded in his ears, leaving him deaf to the world around him. Was Aegon going to die? The maesters skills could only go so far. Were his injuries too severe to be treated? And what of injuries within, injuries that could not be seen with the naked eye?

Aerys could feel the sweat rolling down his skin, making his hair stick to the back of his neck. His feet tingled, and his knees buckled slightly beneath his weight. His vision blurred, and it became almost impossible to focus on anything. Aerys wanted to flee. He couldn’t bear to look at Aegon like this. He couldn’t bear to watch him fade away from this world, away from him. But he could not leave him- he would not. Not this time.

Aerys feels someone grab onto his arm, though he cannot make out their face. He hears them speak, but he cannot make sense of their words. His breathing grew more ragged and heavy, making it almost impossible to catch a full breath.

Perhaps he was more to blame for this than Aemond was. Aerys was no warrior. He had rushed into battle without any clear plan or strategy. In the end, Aegon and Sunfyre had fallen from the sky, and Agana was permanently maimed.

Agana.

His beautiful dragon, whose silver scales glimmered like the moon. His silver maiden who has served him faithfully all these years, protecting him, giving him strength. Yet he could not do the same. He had failed her by sending her into a battle she was unprepared for. One that resulted in her losing an eye. Aerys thought back to how he had left her, broken and alone, as she cried out for him. He was not deserving of her. He believed that before, but he was more sure of it now.

“...Aerys,” a far-away voice calls to him.

Something- someone grabs onto his uninjured arm, trying to pull him away from the bed. But Aerys stands firm, refusing to move.

“Aerys,” the voice calls again, much louder this time.

His vision began to clear as the pain in his arm flared up again, this time worse than before. He bites his lip, trying to keep himself from crying out. Pathetic whimpers escaped his throat as he tried to breathe through his nose. Fingers grasped his chin, turning his head to the side. Aerys looked down, finding the queen dowager staring at him.

“You must let the maesters treat your wounds,” The Queen dowager urged as she tried to pull him away from the bed.

“No,” Aerys gritted his teeth, trying desperately to ignore the searing pain in his shoulder. “I will not leave him.”

“Your wounds will fester. You must be treated,” she insisted.

Aerys ignored her, turning his head back to Aegon. She calls out to him again, but he shakes his head. He would not leave Aegon. No matter how painful it was to see him in this state, Aerys would remain by his side.

“Will he live?” Aerys murmurs.

“The maesters are doing all they can,” the dowager queen replied mournfully.

Her words do little to quell his worries.

“The maesters will treat your wounds here, but you must sit.”

Aerys turns to her, prepared to refuse her aid, but stops when she looks sternly at him. He relents, allowing her to guide him towards the cushioned benches near the window. As soon as she stepped aside, the maesters descended upon him.

One hands him a small cup filled with a white liquid- milk of the poppy.

“No,” Aerys groaned, pushing the cup away.

“It will help with the pain, Lord Reyne.” The maester explained.

“I said no.” Aerys asserted.

Aerys let out a pained hiss as the maester peeled the bandages from his skin.

“Just a sip, my lord, to dull your senses,” the maester reasoned. “The process will be rather painful.”

Aerys groaned, his body jerked to the side as one of the master's hands grazed his wounds. He finally accepted the cup, albeit begrudgingly. The white liquid trickled down his throat. Aerys quickly swallowed, not wishing to have the taste of it stuck in his mouth. When he was through, he shoved the cup back into the maesters hand.

Aerys closed his eyes and gritted his teeth as one of the maesters opened the blisters that had formed and cut away the damaged flesh. The maesters whispered their apologies but continued their work. Aerys ignored them, trying his best to stay quiet. Thankfully, the milk of the poppy seemed to work quickly. His mind was becoming hazy, and his body grew heavy. Even the simple act of clenching his fist seemed almost impossible.

Aerys tried to fight the fatigue threatening to overtake him. But it was a hopeless battle. His eyelids were so heavy he couldn’t lift them even a little. Perhaps some rest wouldn’t hurt.

When Aerys shut his eyes, he dreamed of crows.

There seemed to be hundreds- maybe even thousands of them. His eyes searched the outer yard of the red keep. All around, there were heads mounted on spikes. The smell of blood and rotting flesh overwhelmed the air. Crows sat on the heads, pecking away at the faces of the dead.

It was a grim sight, but to Aerys' surprise, he felt nothing. Neither happiness nor fear. He made his way through the throng of crows. Yet they paid him no mind.

A thousand deafening caws sounded in the air, making Aerys press his hands to his ears to try and drown out the noise. The man raised his head to find hundreds of crows circling above him in the sky. But there was something odd. The sky was not its common shades of blue or gray, but red—like a giant never-ending lake of blood.

“Aerys,” a honeyed voice calls out to him.

Aerys lowers his gaze to find a woman- no, Helaena staring at him. She stands just a few feet away amidst the bloodied spikes.

“What’s happening?” He asks.

“It is time for you to wake now,” she says.

Without another word, she turns around and walks away from him. Aerys calls out to her, but she’s too far away. He tried to run to her, but he found himself unable to move. Aerys looked down to find himself standing in a large pool of blood. It was rising to his knees, or rather, he was sinking into it. He tried to call for help. He tried to twist, turn, and fight his way out, but the faster he moved, the quicker he sank.

Yet if he stayed still, he sunk all the same. The blood sat right under his chin. He lifts his head, gasping for air, preparing himself to be swallowed whole. His body sinks lower. The taste of iron coats his lips. Aerys tried to kick his legs as the red liquid reached his nose.

It was too late. His eyes stung as the blood submerged him completely. His vision clouded with a red mist. The world around him faded. His lungs burned from being deprived of air. It was like someone had stabbed him in the chest. His ears throbbed, and he could only hear his pounding heartbeat. This was it. This was the end.

Aerys awoke with a start. His heart was hammering away in his chest as he sat up. His eyes searched around, meeting the familiar sight of Aegon’s bedchamber. Aerys was unsure of how long he had been asleep. It was still daylight outside. Was it the same day, or was it the next? He looked at his arm, which was wrapped in fresh bandages. Aerys found himself still resting on the cushioned benches near the window.

“Are you feeling alright, Lord Reyne?”

Aerys looked up, finding Maester Orwyle staring at him.

“I’m fine,” he nodded. “How is he?”

The maester looked nervous as he clasped his hands in front of his stomach. “I’m afraid it is too early to tell. We’ve done all we can. His fate rests with the gods now.”

Aerys wanted to laugh—the gods , of course.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Maester Orwyle asked.

“Yes, I just had a ... strange dream, that’s all.” Aerys brushed off the man’s concern.

“Ahh, yes,” the maester hummed. “Poppy dreams, they call them. It happens. I would not pay too much attention to it.”

Aerys nods his head. He had heard of the poppy dreams before. His father had been quite prone to them, or so he heard. They say these dreams caused his father to become oversuspicious of their liege lords, the Lannisters. The man was convinced that they were out to get him and intent on destroying his house.

“The small council is having a meeting,” the maester said. “The queen dowager insisted you be present.”

Aerys sighed and nodded his head. “As she wishes.”

Maester Orwyle helped Aerys get dressed in fresh clothes, before the two of them walked to the small council chamber. The rest of the council members were already present and seated. An extra chair was placed beside Ser Jasper Wylde for Aerys, now that Ser Criston had returned. Aerys quickly took his seat, trying his best not to react when his arm brushed against the chair as he sat down.

“Shall we begin?” Ser Criston announced.

Maester Orwyle was the first to speak. Giving the council a detailed account of the king’s injuries.

“Has he woken?” The Queen dowager asked.

Aerys wondered how she was handling all of this. Aegon was her son, her first son. He couldn’t imagine it was easy on her to see him return in such a state.

“No.” The maester answered solemnly. “I must admit, I’m not sure he will ever wake.”

Aerys let out a quiet scoff, dropping his gaze to the table. He refused to listen to the man. Aegon will live, I know he will. He’s stronger than they think he is, Aerys thought to himself. A thick tension grew in the air, as the maester finished saying his piece. They all believed Aegon would die. Doubters, he called them in his mind.

The Queen dowager is the first to act. She stands to her feet, resting her hands against the wooden table.

“A king cannot rule in his sleep,” she says. “The realm will have noticed his absence. Let them hear of his great deeds at Rook’s Rest.”

Aerys turns his head, looking towards the end of the table where that one-eyed coward sat. Though the man kept his single eye lowered to the table. Aerys glared at him. This is all his fault, he thought again.

“But now we must name a regent to take his place. Until he recovers ... or does not.”

Aerys turned his head towards the king's seat- Aegon’s seat. He didn’t want to be here. He should have remained by Aegon’s side.

“A wise strategy, your grace.” Lord Strong replied. “A regency will assure the people of the stability of the crown.”

“Did you have a candidate in mind, your grace?” Lord Tyland asked.

Aerys wanted to laugh. The answer was obvious. These lords were simply letting her down easy, like a mother does her child when they want something they cannot have.

“I myself served in this role for my husband. I am well-prepared to do it again,” she asserted.

Her eyes glanced at all the men around the table. It reminded him of when Aegon had done the same at the last council meeting when they had shut down his ideas in favor of Aemond, just as they were about to do to her now.

“You played your part admirably in a time of peace, your grace. But circumstances have changed.” Lord Jasper spoke up.

“And here I had forgotten,” she quipped.

Lord Jasper ignored her, continuing on. “The king does not lack for heirs. The obvious choice is his immediate successor, Prince Aemond.”

“Agreed,” Lord Tyland affirmed.

“Aemond is young,” she argued. “And his lack of restraint has already cost us dearly.”

She looks around the table again, looking for support. Aerys decides to answer her call.

“The queen dowager is right,” he says. “Aemond’s skill is best employed on the battlefield. The person best suited for the task is someone who already has experience ruling the realm. Don’t you think?”

“It is experience that offers the surest path to security,” Maester Orwyle chimes in. “Queen Alicent ably shouldered the duties of the realm when her husband’s health failed him.”

“Experience is valuable, yes, but the dowager queen is a woman.”

Aerys snickered at the master of laws statement. “I assure you, Ironrod, not all women are as faint-hearted as one so simple-minded might think.”

Aerys looks to the master of laws, who is glaring daggers at him. A smirk crosses his lips as he watches the mad turn red with anger and embarrassment.

“I am no stranger to rule or to sitting at this council. Aemond is a fearsome dragon rider; as Lord Reyne said, his skill is best employed in the field, but my experience is needed here, at this table.”

“No offense was meant, your grace, but at a time where we must show strength-”

The woman did not wait for Ser Tyland to finish speaking before calling out to Lord Larys Strong. Though the man proved to be of little help to her.

“I agree, your grace. It must be Prince Aemond. What would it say if, in response to Rhaenyra’s crowning, we raised up a woman of our own?”

“Then it should be Lord Reyne!” She countered.

Aerys snapped his head towards her, his eyes widened, “What?”

“Your grace,” Lord Tyland sighed.

“It is inconceivable,” Lord Jasper interjected. “The man doesn’t even have a proper seat on this council. Are we so willing to put the stability of the crown in the hands of a man who has spent years by the princesses’ side?”

“What are you implying, Lord Jasper?” Aerys snarled.

Before Lord Jasper could answer, the queen dowager called out to Aerys. He turned his head towards her, catching a glimpse of the stern look on her face. Aerys huffed and sat back in his chair. He looked to the master of laws, glaring at him one last time. His eyes flickered over to Aemond. The prince had his gaze fixated on him. Aerys shot him a glare before turning his eyes back toward the table in front of him. The queen dowager continued, arguing on his behalf.

“Aerys has proved himself to be a loyal member of our cause. He fought against Princess Rhaenys in defense of our king and was wounded in the process. The king trusts him. If he were here, I'm sure he would vote in favor of Lord Reyne himself.”

“Lord Reyne is too far down the line in terms of succession, your grace. Prince Aemond is the king’s heir.” Lord Strong replied. “But umm, the hand speaks with the king’s voice Ser Criston, what say you?”

All eyes turned towards the king’s hand. Ser Criston had been unusually silent since they had started the meeting. The man kept his head low but glanced his eyes up for a second before quickly dropping them back to his hands, which were clasped together tightly on the table.

“Aemond is the next in line. It must be him.”

The woman’s eyes were full of betrayal. Ser Criston had been her sworn protector and a dear friend for years. His words must have stung.

“It’s agreed then,” Aemond speaks for the first time since they had entered the room.

Aerys leans back, dropping his gaze to the ground. He stared at the dirt and grime that stuck to his boots as Aemond walked around the table. He refuses to look at the man as he sits in the king’s chair- Aegon’s chair .

“What is our standing in the riverlands?” Aemond asks.

Aerys chews on his lip, trying desperately to remain calm. He stays silent as Lord Tyland drones on about the Riverlands, as maester Orwyle talks about the smallfolk's unease, and as Aemond starts barking orders. He remains seated when all the others stand.

“We shall meet again at first light,” Aemond declared. “Oh, and someone cut down the fucking ratcatchers.”

Aerys finally stood, prepared to return to Aegon, when Aemond called for him to stay. The dowager queen tried to stay behind, but Aemond quickly dismissed her. Aerys sat back in his seat, fixating his eyes on the table. Aemond waits until everyone is out of the room, and the door slams shut before he speaks.

“I understand my brother ordered you to attend these meetings. I am now relieving you of your obligation.”

Aerys gave no reply, instead choosing to continue staring at the table. This did not seem to sit well with Aemond, who continued speaking at him. Though Aerys paid no mind to what he was saying. His words became muffled in his ears.

“Were you trying to kill him?” Aerys asked, interrupting the prince’s spiel.

He can see Aemond stiffen from the corner of his eye. Aerys turns his head, finally looking at the newly instated prince regent. The fury behind Aemond’s eye was palpable; a vein pulsed through the skin of his forehead.

“I’d choose my words more carefully if I were you, nephew ,” his words are laced with venom.

“Or what?” Aerys challenged.

Aerys was unsure where this newfound confidence had come from. He had never been very contentious, but something about Aemond drew it out of him. Aemond’s jaw clenched as he stared at Aerys, trying to intimidate him.

“I was there, Aemond. You burned him.”

“Aegon wasn’t supposed to be there. It was he who put himself in harm's way,” Aemond replied nonchalantly.

“Only because you did not let him in on your ploy,” Aerys argued.

“Am I supposed to hold his hand and explain everything to him like a child?”

“No, but as his brother, you should stand by his side. Instead, you’ve done everything you can to undermine him. And now this?!”

“He wasn’t supposed to be there,” Aemond hissed. “Do not act like you are completely blameless in this.”

Aerys looked at him confused, “What are you-”

“I was there, Aerys,” Aemond snickered, mocking him. “Agana could have killed Rhaenys, but you turned her away. Perhaps if you had let her do it, I would not have had to act.”

“Well, I apologize, but not all of us are so keen on becoming kinslayers,” Aerys retorted, furious that Aemond would try to pin this on him.

Aemond growled and lunged forward. For a moment, Aerys believed he would strike him. He closed his eyes and prepared himself for the blow, but it never came. He opened his eyes, watching as Aemond pulled back, lowering his arm back to his side. The man’s breath is ragged, his single eye blazing with rage. Aerys can see how hard he is trying to restrain himself.

“It seems the milk of the poppy has left you delirious, nephew ,” Aemond jibed, his tone filled with malice. “Perhaps some more rest is needed.”

“I don’t need-”

Before Aerys could refute the man’s assertion, Aemond called out to the guards outside the room. Immediately, two members of the Kingsguard entered the room.

“Yes, your grace?”

“Lord Reyne is tired, see him to his chambers.”

“I am not tired,” Aerys rebuffed. “I must return to the king’s side.”

“Have the maesters prepare some essence of nightshade to help him sleep,” Aemond continued as if Aerys wasn’t even present.

“Yes, your grace.” The guards nodded, moving to Aerys’ side.

The man sent Aemond one last vitriolic glare before begrudgingly standing on his feet. The one-eyed man stared back at him with a vexing smirk upon his face. With his fists clenched and arms pinned to his sides, Aerys stormed out of the room. The guard’s armor rattled as they trailed closely behind him.

Aemond was demonstrating his authority, reminding Aerys that he had no allies here now that Aegon was abed.

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