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hard--headed--woman · 4 months

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Hello and happy Pride Month everyone ! 🏳️‍🌈

As promised, I am going to talk about an important lesbian in history everyday. And this first post is about one of my favourite :

Renée Vivien !

I have seen some people talk about her here but she clearly isn’t as famous as she should be, and she deserves way more recognition!

Renée Vivien, whose birth name is Pauline Mary Tam, was a British writer poetess, who wrote her poetry (and most of her works) in french ; born in 1877, she died in 1909, at only 32 years old.

Renée was openly a lesbian, and she never tried to hide it despite the society she lived in being extremely homophobic and considering homosexuality as an illness. In her poetry, she mentions her love for women a lot, and wrote a lot of love poems for several of her lovers. This even earned her the nickname “Sappho 1900”. ("Sappho 1900, Sappho cent pour cent").

Of Sappho, she was by the way a huge fan : in 1903, she published the work "Sappho", in which the poet's Greek texts are followed by a French translation, as well as verses by Renée Vivien, which thus "completes" the remaining fragments of Sappho's writings. This collection greatly helped to anchor Sappho's work and her identity as a lesbian woman in our culture.

Her work consists of :

Twelve collections of poems, totalling more than 500 poems

Several translations of Greek poetesses (including Sappho)

Seven books of prose

Around ten novels (written under various pseudonyms)

A posthumously published collection of short Gothic tales (written in English this time)

A book about Anne Boleyn's life

It is also possible to read her diary and the letters she exchanged with her lovers, friends and other personalities of her time, including Natalie Clifford Barney, Colette, Kérimé Turkhan Pacha and others.

Pauline studied both in Paris and in London, then decided, once she came of age, to come and settle in Paris. She published her first collection,"Études et Préludes" in 1901, under the pseudonym R.Vivien. This pseudonym later became René Vivien (the male version of Renée) then Renée Vivien, the name under which she will be remembered. We can easily guess that she first chose these neutral then masculine pseudonyms to be able to write and be published despite the misogyny and homophobia of her time, especially given the themes exploited in her writings.

Sadness, death, ancient Greece, love, despair, solitude and love are the most recurrent themes in Renée's poems. There is actually a poetry prize in her name, the Prix Renée Vivien, which rewards poets whose themes and style are close to those of Renée Vivien.

Among Renée's best-known lovers is Natalie Clifford Barney, a famous writer and poet, with whom she had a relationship for several years before leaving her, tired of her infidelities. It is said that Natalie never accepted this breakup and tried until the end to get her back by all means, sending her love letters even years after.

Renée then had a relationship of more than six years with the rich Baroness Hélène de Zuylen, married and mother of two children, with whom she traveled extensively around the world and collaborated on the writing of several works (under the collective pseudonym Paule Riversdale). In a letter to her friend Jean Charles-Brun, Renée admitted that she considered herself married to Hélène.

While still living with the Baroness, she received a letter from a mysterious admirer, Kérimé Turkhan Pacha. What followed was an intense four-year epistolary relationship, interspersed with brief clandestine meetings. In 1908, however, Kérimé, the wife of a Turkish diplomat, put an end to their relationship when she had to follow her husband to St. Petersburg. This break-up probably contributed to Renée's tragic end.

The writer was in deep psychological distress, which only worsened from 1908 onwards. Alcoholic and suicidal, she began refusing to eat properly, and attempted suicide with laudanum. After this failed suicide attempt, she contracted pleurisy, which left her very weak, and then chronic gastritis due to her alcohol abuse. She gradually fell into anorexia, and, with her limbs paralyzed by multiple neuritis, she died on November 18, 1909, aged just 32. Her death was attributed to "pulmonary congestion", probably due to pneumonia complicated by alcohol and anorexia.

After her death, intellectuals, artists and newspapers, out of lesbophobia, tried to make her forgotten by the literary world, describing her as a woman of evil and damnation, perverse and cruel, going so far as to invent for her a life of crime, debauchery, orgies with married women, violence and cocaine consumption.

Today, Renée Vivien's name is no longer known to the general public, and is never mentioned alongside those of great ans famous poets such as Arthur Rimbaud or Charles Baudelaire, despite her gorgeous poetry, her immense talent and fascinating work.

She's personally my favourite, and not only because she was a lesbian. Her poetry is the most beautiful, interesting and deep poetry I have ever seen. She deserves to be as famous as Victor Hugo or Paul Eluard (and even more famous, in my opinion lol).

Here is one of her poems, with its english translation :

A link to some of her poems (in french but you can use a translator) ;

And two links with some of her poems translated into english : 1 and 2.

You should totally buy and read her books and poems, I have them and they're amazing!!! I'll post more translations of her poems in the future for those interested.

Anyway, thanks for reading and see you tomorrow for the second post!

#lesbian #renée vivien #renee vivien #pride #pride month #poetry #french poetry #poésie française #poésie #female homosexuality #female homosexual #lesbian history #lesbian artist

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joanquill · 3 months

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How Touching

How Albert would react to a reader who doesn't like physical intimacy at first in the modern era.

Albert James Moriarty

A/N: Sorry for the long absence, a lot has happened and writer's block has made a home in my head rent-free at this point it's almost homophobic :) (as you can probably tell with this one so advanced apologies!) late happy pride month! 💕🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

Tag/s: One-Shot with Headcanons, Modern!AU, Long (2.2k words)

Warning/s: Slightly Suggestive(???)

When you first joined the Moriartys with their plan to abolish the class system, the group welcomed you with open arms.

Quite literally with how Bonde tried to hug you as a greeting.

You evaded him smoothly, surprising the man and the others.

But you explained how you were uncomfortable with physical touch, and everyone respected your boundaries.

Despite the awkward start, everyone still welcomed you.

And as time passed, you slowly grew closer to everyone in the group.

But especially with the oldest Moriarty, seeing as your job usually involved assisting him.

Whether being his partner on missions or attending parties with the rich, you two are usually seen together.

It also doesn't help that you were mostly in charge of maintaining the manor in London when Louis and Master Jack were away.

Because of this, you also tend to stay with him in London while William and the others are back in Durham.

This leads to you and Albert sharing chores in London.

While Albert is a master when it comes to cleaning, you always make sure he's nowhere near the kitchen or at least have you there to supervise.

The first time you tried his cooking, you were out of commission for three days.

Because of how much time you spend together, you two started to get closer.

And this didn't go unnoticed by your housemates.

"(Y/N), have you seen my-?"

"-It's in your coat pocket,"

"And the-?"

"-It's already in your suitcase,"

"And did you already inform-?"

"-Yes, Director Holmes is aware of your return to London tonight," you answered as you showed him the email you sent to the director.

Albert chuckled as he loosened his collar, "What would I do without you?"

You smirked at his remark as you fixed his loosened collar and necktie.

"Well, aren't you just a perfect match," Sebastian commented from the couch, watching you two blankly.

You froze at his words as you turned away, making sure your expression remained neutral.

"It's almost freaky, to be honest..." he shuddered, making you chuckle.

"Don't you have a chimney to sweep, colonel?" Albert reminded, earning a glare from Sebastian as the doors burst open, Bonde running inside the room.

"You're really leaving already? We planned to go to that new restaurant this afternoon," Bonde asked as he walked in, seeing you and Albert grabbing your coats.

"Yes... The director suddenly called saying it was an urgent matter, so our plans will have to be rescheduled," you explained, much to Bonde's disappointment.

You smiled softly at him as you gave him a gentle hug.

"Don't worry, I'm sure we can go there some other time," you reassured as you pulled away, seeing a shocked expression from the three men.

"...What?"

"You hugged him..." Sebastian pointed out, making you raise a brow and smile.

"Yes, and what about it?" you teased, hugging Bonde again, surprising them for a second time.

"What the-?!"

"Awww, (N/N)!" Bonde smiled as he hugged you back tightly, cherishing the moment as you laughed.

"No way..." Sebastian breathed out a smile, "To think Bonde would be the first..." he smirked, looking over to Albert, who held a faux smile as he walked up to you and Bonde.

"(Y/N), I believe it is about time for us to leave?" he reminded, making you gasp.

"Right! I'll go call a cab," you hurriedly walked out of the manor, hoping you wouldn't miss the last train back to London.

Sebastian laughed wholeheartedly as the door behind you closed, hitting Albert's back while Bonde kept a hand over his mouth, hiding a proud smile from the oldest Moriarty.

"Didn't expect you to be the possessive type!" Sebastian snickered, making Albert lightly scoff and swatted Sebastian's hand.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Albert denied as he grabbed the bags.

"(Y/N) is a reliable comrade to all of us,"

"Then why don't you let them stay in Durham with us?"

"Because their skills are needed in London,"

"But what if William asks them to stay with us?"

"Then there's no helping it, I suppose,"

"Oh?" William's voice cut through, catching everyone's attention.

"Then you finally agree to have (Y/N) stay with us for this weekend?" he asked, but Albert stayed silent as he kept facing away from the group.

"You seemed quite adamant about having them join you back to London mere moments ago when we were discussing in my office," William added, making Albert sigh as Sebastian and Bonde grinned from ear to ear.

"My, my, Al. How unprofessional," Bonde teased as he tried to see Albert's face, now contorted in irritation as he kept his smile.

"It seems (Y/N)'s skills are needed here in Durham more than in London," Sebastian added, wrapping an arm around Albert's shoulders,

"Such a shame..."

William chuckled as he walked up to the group, giving Albert a piece of paper.

"Here are the details for your and (Y/N)'s next mission in London. It seems (Y/N) is more needed in London after all," William innocently smiled, making Albert sigh.

"...I will make sure to visit again next week with them,"

"Thank you, Nii-san. And do not worry about (Y/N)'s affections," William commented, perking Albert's ears.

"I'm certain they also consider you one of their closest companions. But you must be more proactive if you wish for them to see you as something more," he reassured the oldest Moriarty, catching everyone's attention.

"That is not-"

"-The cab's here!" you announced as you hurried back inside, seeing everyone gathering around Albert.

"...What? Do we have another meeting before leaving?" you questioned, making the others share a look as they left, saying their goodbyes as Albert walked up to you with your bags and coats.

"What were you discussing while I was gone?" you questioned as Albert gave you your coat and scarf.

"Just..." Albert replied, looking down at the paper William gave him, "Have courage" written on it, "... Just the details for our next mission," he smiled, pocketing the piece of paper as he helped you with your scarf, careful not to touch you.

"...I shall tell you later,"

During the trip back to London, you noticed Albert has grown quiet, deep in his thoughts.

As you tried to ignore the man's change of behavior, he suddenly called your name and asked what you thought of everyone in the group.

Confused by the sudden question, you shrugged it off and answered honestly, seeing everyone as a trusted companion, possibly even family.

"Really?"

"Yes. Don't you see me as one?" you jokingly asked, making Albert smile widely.

"...No, I cannot say the same," he answered, shocking you. You quickly turned to him and saw him looking at you with straightforward eyes.

"You may have started as one of my most trusted companions, but I never saw you as family," he explained, straightening himself up as he grabbed the end of your scarf.

"But as a lover," he clarified, gingerly kissing the end of your scarf as he kept his eyes on you.

After his declaration of love, the trip back to London felt excruciatingly long.

Nonetheless, you admitted you felt the same you both agreed to take it slow.

Albert was a true gentleman in the whole relationship, making sure you were comfortable with everything.

He makes sure to spend time with you, whether it's just at home or out on a date, giving you gifts, and words of reassurance.

He would never make you feel you were lacking or guilty about taking the relationship slow.

He also never tried to touch you or force himself on you.

He might feel jealous whenever you and others hug, such as Bonde, Fred, or your close friends, but he won't force you to do the same to him.

"You will be gone for three weeks?" you repeated in disbelief as Albert nodded dejectedly.

"Yes, which is why we discussed that you should stay in Durham with the others in the meantime,"

"I see... If that's the case, I need to see some things before I leave," you muttered, trying to plan your sudden leave as you looked around the manor.

Albert breathed out a laugh as he let out a dramatic sigh, catching your attention.

"How cold... And I thought you would miss me more," he teased, opening one eye at you with a playful smile.

You scoffed as you walked up to him, cradling his cheek.

"You will be coming back home to me after, are you not?" you questioned, making him smirk.

"Always," he reassured, taking your gloved hand and kissing your knuckles.

You smiled as you interlocked your fingers with his, clasping it.

"Then I have nothing to worry about,"

"(N/N)!" Bonde beamed as he ran up to you, giving you a hug as he squeezed you tightly.

You giggled as you hugged him back, returning the same affection.

"You should go on more overnight trips, Al," Bonde joked, making Albert roll his eyes with a smile as he put on his hat.

"Next time, I shall bring (Y/N) with me," Albert mused, kissing your gloved hand again.

"Take care, Albert-nii-san," Louis smiled as Albert waved goodbye to everyone.

"Goodbye,"

"Take your time~,"

"Be careful...!" you warned, sighing at the memory of Albert returning home in a bloody uniform.

"Aww... Miss him already?" Bonde teased with a toothy grin, making you scoff and lightly push him off.

"Come on... I remember Louis saying we're doing some spring cleaning in the manor?" you reminded, making Bonde and Sebastian freeze.

"Oi! Keep your mouth shut...!" Sebastian shouted in a whisper as he grabbed your head, making you grin.

"That's right..." Louis started, a dark glimmer shining from his glasses, "I hope you two are done with your portions?"

It's been two weeks since Albert's trip, and he has been calling you every night and leaving short, sweet texts throughout the day.

But, you couldn't help but feel uneasy.

"Hey, (Y/N)!" Sebastian called out, snapping you out of it.

"Y-Yes?"

"William's calling everyone for a meeting," he reminded, raising a brow at you.

"What's wrong with you?" he questioned, making you shake your head.

"It's nothing," you faked a smile as you walked ahead, unsure if it was a topic you could bring up to the man.

As you walked ahead, Sebastian couldn't help but let out a sigh as he followed you along.

"Lovebirds... What a pain,"

"Well! This is new," Bonde smiled as he swirled his martini while Sebastian downed his third whiskey for the night.

"I didn't think you would be the type to offer free drinks, (N/N),"

"I'm not," you sighed, nursing your cup of water, "But I would like to talk to you both in private..." you muttered, looking around your booth for any familiar faces or peeking heads.

"Since you two seem the most... acquainted with this subject..." you added, fiddling your fingers as you stared down at your drink.

Sebastian raised a brow while Bonde furrowed his brows, looking at each other as if trying to figure out what you were alluding to.

"So... What is it?" Bonde asked, taking a sip of his drink while Sebastian tried to catch the attention of a nearby server.

You felt your face burn as you took a deep breath, gathering up all of the courage you had.

"How do you know when's the right time to be physical with your partner?" you asked in one quick breath with your eyes shut.

Sebastian froze while Bonde choked on his drink, making him cough.

"A-Are you all right, sir?" the server Sebastian called asked Bonde, who dismissed him.

"Y-Yes... I'm fine," Bonde coughed as you tried to give him your drink while Sebastian asked the server to just bring more whiskey.

"Thanks..." Bonde sighed, clearing his throat as he looked at you.

"(Y/N), by... physical, you mean...?" Sebastian asked in a hushed tone as he and Bonde leaned to you across the table.

You felt your face flush as you looked away, hiding behind your hands.

"L-Like kissing, and such..." you clarified, stunning the two men.

They both sighed as Sebastian leaned back in his seat with a hand over his eyes while Bonde had his face in his hands.

"That's what you meant..."

'It'll come naturally, huh...' you thought, remembering your conversation with Bonde and Sebastian.

You sighed as you focused on your chores and hoped for the best, just as they advised.

As you fixed the dinner table, you heard the front doors open, making you gasp and look back.

"I'm back," Albert announced, wearily putting away his coat.

You instinctively ran out of the dining room and to the entrance.

As Albert caught sight of you, he immediately smiled as you kept running up to him.

"(Y/N), I found-" you wrapped your arms around him tightly, sighing as your body eased up at his warmth.

Albert, on the other hand, was stunned as you kept hugging him.

"(Y/N)...?" he called out as he hovered an arm around you.

You breathed out a smile as you looked up at him, squeezing him lightly,

"Welcome back," you greeted as you cupped his cheeks, kissing his lips.

Albert blinked in surprise before wrapping his arms around you, deepening the kiss.

When you pulled back, you felt Albert leaning to you before opening his eyes, and smiling at you.

"I missed you too,"

#yuukoku no moriarty x reader #moriarty the patriot x reader #albert moriarty x reader #albert james moriarty x reader #albert moriarty #albert james moriarty #headcanons #imagines

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super-ace · 1 year

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I went to my first Pride event in London in 2019 and at the time I was still ‘very straight’ and I went with a straight friend as allies. I honestly use the word ally as a badge of honour when I talk about her because she’s so great and I will genuinely always go to her instead of my gay mates whenever I’m having a wobble about my sexuality. At the time I wasn’t properly questioning my sexuality, it was more of a background niggle. But I just remember thinking that I was with my people. Looking around and seeing everyone be unapologetically themselves and I’d see kids with their parents which made me emotional at the thought that they were so supportive. I always felt such an affinity with the queer community and just felt so at home at Pride. So whenever people say that aces and aros aren’t part of the queer community I get my back up a bit because I’ve only ever felt part of the queer community.

🏳️‍🌈❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🏳️‍⚧️

🖤🩶🤍💜

💚🤍🩶🖤

#asexual #ace #asexuality #asexual spectrum #ace pride #aroace #aromantic #aro #queer #lgbtqia+#happy pride 🌈

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consult-sherlockholmes · 3 months

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Happy Pride in London 🏳️‍🌈

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melodygatesauthor · 5 months

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Feeling You Can't Fight - Chapter Three

Not Beta Read - Masterlist - Pride Event Fic 🏳️‍🌈

Written for the @flightlessangelwings pride event - (Yes this was written for the 2023 pride event and I'm trying to finish it before pride 2024 I'M SORRY).

Summary (Entire Fic Summary)

After replacing the loathsome former staff manager of the National Art Gallery in London, you find yourself all too interested in one of your employees in particular. Manager and employee relationships aren't allowed, and even if they were, you aren't sure if the nervous gift shoppist would be interested in you anyway. There's only one way to find out...

Reader Inclusivity

Reader is not race coded, is a cis man, taller than MK by a few inches, British, ex military, has a big peen

Tags/Warnings (for entire series)

NSFW, writer is NOT from the UK so please be gentle, I did my best with UK terms and such, smut, anal sex, oral sex, anal creampies, cum eating, cum swallowing, rough sex, Marc has DID, reader has mild PTSD, PTSD symptoms, trauma responses, semi-public sex, praise kink, fluff, comfort, angst, romance, love, forbidden relationship (boss and employee), minor physical violence.

Word Count: 3.1k

“Wait love wait!”

The entire demeanor of the man in front of you changed into the sweet, caring man that you were smitten with. You let go of him, stepping back and looking down at him with a furrowed brow. You felt your heart racing as your fight or flight kicked in. Steven looked nervous as he stepped forward, pressing his palm to your broad chest.

“D-darling I…well…we have something we want to share with you and I thought that if we’re getting more serious then…no time like the present yeah?”

“Steven…what’s going on?” You were trying not to express your irritation with him, but your balled fists gave you away.

“M’gonna let Marc tell you everything but you have to promise not to hurt him, yeah?” Steven looked up at you, brows turned up and knitted together as he awaited your answer.

He gulped, rubbing your clothed pecks with his hand, smoothing out the wrinkles in your button-down. He tried smiling at you, biting his bottom lip. You didn’t like making Steven so frightened so you let out a deep exhale. If he wasn’t scared or in danger, then you didn’t need to be so on edge. You nodded slowly.

Steven let out a deep breath, “right then, gonna let him out now.”

You watched in awe as Steven’s eyes rolled back in his head and then his body changed again. He stood a little taller, and his expression appeared a little darker. The man breathed deeply, looking up at you before pulling his hand off your body as though he’d been burned. He averted his gaze. You could’ve sworn you saw his cheeks get a little more rosy.

“What the fuck is happenin’?” You asked in a serious tone.

“Look, I told Steven you weren’t ready for this conversation but he insisted we have it so…here we are. He said it was gettin’ serious with you and he didn’t want any more secrets between you two,” he cleared his throat nervously, “my name is Marc Spector.” The man shrugged, “I guess the easiest way to tell you is to just get it out there so…I have an identity disorder as a result of my childhood trauma.”

You both stood silently for a moment while you absorbed the information. You recalled your time in the British Armed Forces, and some of the horrific things you’d seen. Trauma caused the brain to do amazing things; Things that were difficult to explain sometimes. You understood trauma well. You looked at Marc’s face, seeing the seriousness behind his eyes. This wasn’t a game. This wasn’t some guy trying to mess with you, or pull a fast one on you. This was a man who had been through something horrible, or several horrible things, and it caused his mind to tear at the seams.

You nodded in understanding, “alright, yeah, I don’t know everything there is to know about identity disorders but, I’ve got some mental issues of my own mate, keep goin’.”

Marc nodded and exhaled in relief, “well, my…our mom…”

You put a hand on Marc’s shoulder, “s’fine, you don’t have to explain it t’me.”

“I…Steven, wants me to, he wants you to know, and he’s right…I need to be the one to tell you, because I’m the one who was there.” He looked away from you and at the floor, “our mom used to beat me, she hated me.”

You squeezed Marc’s shoulder gently. His head jolted up, glossed eyes meeting with yours. He shook his head, as though he were begging you not to make him continue.

“I meant what I said, and I’m talkin’ to Steven too…you don’t have to explain this t’me. I understand.”

“Fuck,” Marc said, turning away from you and covering his face in his hands.

I was awkward as hell to stand there while Marc cried, but you were glad he was getting it off his chest. You wondered if he’d ever shared this with anyone, or if it was only you. Either way, you knew he wasn’t sharing for his own sake, but instead for Steven’s, and you could respect that. When you look back now, you think that on the same day you met Marc, was the day you fell in love with him too, but you didn’t realize it yet.

“There’s another one too,” Marc looked at the water glass on the table.“Steven, I have to tell him.” You watched the - from your perspective - one sided conversation between Marc and Steven. “You didn’t want to keep this a secret but you want to keep him a secret? St–” Marc grumbled and then looked at you, “I’m telling you, even though Steven doesn’t want me to.”

“Tellin’ me what?”

“Jake is the third one of us. You may never meet him, but he’s here nonetheless,” Marc let out a sharp exhale, “We don’t really see him much either, but…the three of us get along…kinda.”

“Well, if he’s part of Steven’s life, then I look forward to meeting him,” you gave Marc a kind smirk.

You watched Marc’s entire body language change. It wasn’t like before when he switched from Steven to himself, but instead, it looked like his entire body relaxed with your reassurance. Marc looked like he might collapse and start crying again right then and there. You wondered when the last time he’d talked to someone about this was…if he’d ever talked to someone about this.

“Damn. That was…easier than I thought. You took that surprisingly well,” he said, giving you a tight lipped smirk.

“Had a boatload of therapy,” you shrugged, “I learnt long ago that you can’t really tell how the mind is gonna deal with trauma.” You thought now was as good a time as any to change the subject, seeing that Marc was getting uncomfortable again. “So are you…do you like…” you pointed to yourself. Of course you would hop from one uncomfortable topic to another.

Marc’s eyes shot wide once he realized what you were suggesting, “no, no, I like women, one hundred percent.”

Marc crossed his arms and cleared his throat nervously.

“But this, Steven and me, that doesn’t bother you?” You asked.

“Oh, oh, no. Steven’s happy, and the way I see it, that’s the only thing that matters,” Marc’s lips managed to curl into a smirk.

You could tell he cared about Steven, and so the two of you had that much in common, but that wasn’t the last time you saw Marc. You saw him again when you and Steven got into your first argument. It wasn’t anything serious, but it seemed to upset Steven enough to force him into the headspace.

The argument was stupid, and if you were being honest, it was a little funny. Steven walked into your office one afternoon, closing the door behind himself. He was stammering, as he often did when he was thinking about what he wanted to say faster than the words could come out. You chuckled, standing up and walking over to him, cupping his face.

“S’alright love, just tell me what’s wrong,” you brushed your thumb over his stubbled cheek.

“Gettin’ fed up with Linda not pickin’ up her mess in the break room,” Steven groaned, “I know s’not a big deal, not really, but I told her three times to pick up after herself and she still acts like a right slob.”

“Steven, that’s not really somethin’ I deal with,” you said as he huffed out a frustrated breath.

“I know, sometimes I just want to complain a bit, yeah?”

“C’mere,” you said, motioning with your finger.

He walked back over to you and pressed his face into your chest, “I’m irritated.”

You wrapped your arms around him, “I know darling,” you pushed him back at arm’s length, but I know something that might help.”

Steven had joked about wanting to blow you under your desk, but he’d never actually done it yet. In fact, he hadn’t blown you before at all. He acted like you were doing him a favor when you sat down in your big office chair with your legs spread out and his face between them. The way his eyes went wide with excitement and he started drooling you would’ve thought he was the one getting a blowjob.

He looked hungry, fumbling with the button and then the zipper of your pants as he released your cock from its confines. He always - always - made a comment about how big you were. His eyes crossed as your dick lined up between them, and he seemed breathless despite not yet having done anything at all.

“Steven, darling, might be too big f’you to fit in your mouth, it’s alright if you don’t want to.”

He looked up at you, putting a hand on either of your thighs.

“I want to,” he said softly.

Steven licked a stripe up your length, forcing your cock to twitch in response. You grabbed the arms of your chair as he repeated the gesture. You bucked your hips upward involuntarily. Steven giggled and looked up at you.

“Ooh, needy…” He wrapped his fingers around your girth, pumping up and down slowly, “you’re a bit leaky too love.”

“Are you gonna keep teasin’ me, or are you gonna be a good boy and take this thing like you were made to?” You asked, raising an eyebrow.

Steven nodded with a shaky breath, smile fading at your words. You felt bad being so verbally rough with him sometimes, but you knew he enjoyed it. Whenever the two of you were in bed together it was like flipping a switch, making him hard in an instant. You slid down further in your chair, moving one of your hands to the back of his curly head.

He licked up your length again before taking the head in his mouth. You shuddered seeing Steven’s lips stretched around your fat dick. It seemed like he really was made to take it, sliding over the length as though his gag reflex was nonexistent. You exhaled sharply, feeling the way his tongue rolled over the underside of your shaft.

“Oh god Steven, takin’ me so well love, that’s it, just like t-that,” you pushed him down over you even more, “you tap my knee if it’s too much darling, don’t wanna hurt you.”

You felt his throat contract around you. There was still more to go, and you wanted nothing more than to see your entire dick disappear inside his precious mouth. You brushed a thumb over his cheek.

“Relax your throat, Steven, open up f’me,” you felt his muscles relax and you were able to push in further. “That’s it, that’s my good boy.”

Steven moaned over your length as he started bobbing his head in a delicious rhythm. He took one hand off your thighs and you heard the clank of his belt while he started freeing his own cock. The sound of him jerking himself could just barely be heard over the sound of him choking on your dick.

He looked up at you with affectionate and tear glossed eyes when you carded your hand through his hair. You bit your bottom lip and started rolling your hips slowly forward into his mouth, brushing your pubes against his nose as he took every single inch you had to offer.

“Steven, you sure you’ve never done this before?” Your entire body trembled, “s-so good…”

You heard the distinct sound of footsteps approaching the door. You both froze.

“Steven, you locked the door, yeah?”

Steven, in fact, hadn’t locked the door.

Steven made himself as hidden as he could in the space under your desk, where the intruder wouldn’t be able to see him. You rolled up as close as you could get without crushing him in there. John, your boss, walked in, smiling big. He stepped over, putting a hand on the varnished surface of the desk, leaning in to talk to you.

“Hey! Just stoppin’ in to tell you I think you’re doin’ great, and those reports you sent me yesterday…perfect.” He patted your shoulder and you jumped in response.

You felt Steven between your legs trying to put your cock back in your pants, but struggling given its current…state. You were close before while he had it buried in his throat, and that hadn’t changed in the seconds that had gone by. You were still close, and him moving it around wasn’t helping that issue. You kept your eyes on John, but tried like hell to push Steven’s hands and face away from you, but to no avail.

“Well I’m…oh…” you cleared your throat, “I’m glad you l-liked them.”

Steven didn’t get the hint, he was still sliding his hand over your length, trying to get it back inside your boxers. You couldn’t try very hard to stop him, or it would be obvious you were trying to do something under your desk, so you stopped trying, and just hoped that John would leave before…oh god.

You slammed your hand on the desk, “f-fuck!”

To John, you must’ve looked insane, like you were staring at him wide-eyed and shouting for no apparent reason. To you and Steven, you were coming, hot ropes of your spend hitting your boyfriend in the face under the desk. You managed to keep yourself from saying anything too telling, and you kept your breathing level…as level as you could.

“Fuck I forgot to sign the agreement for the…the uhhh–”

“Oh! For the new display going into the Ancient Egypt section of course! I’ll go get that right now!” John chuckled, “glad you remembered that, I’ll be right back.”

As he walked out, you rolled back in your chair to see Steven’s pretty face covered in globs of your spend. He looked pissed off, crawling out from under the desk and grabbing a few tissues from your desk to clean himself off.

“Darling, what’s wrong? You’re the one who–”

“You…did this…all over my face!”

“Love, I couldn’t help it, you kept touchin’ me and–”

“And,” he held a finger up, “and you could’ve locked the door before havin’ me do that in the first place!”

“Steven, you could’ve locked the door yourself when you walked–”

“I wasn’t plannin’ to come in here and do somethin’ like that now was I?”

You could see the embarrassment in his flush cheeks. He seemed exasperated, chest rising and falling with every heavy breath. He wasn’t really mad at you, but you doubted you’d be getting another ‘under the desk’ blow job any time soon.

“Now your boss knows what we were doin’ and he’s gonna make you fire me and maybe he’ll even fire you and–”

“Stop…” you cupped his cheeks and kissed his forehead.

“No!” he pushed you off of him, “no, m’not gonna let you just kiss this one away. We could’ve been caught, you’re reckless and this isn’t like me at all! I don’t do things like this!” Steven stormed out of your office, passing John on his way out.

That was it…that was the argument.

You supposed that with Steven never having really been in a relationship before, an argument with his first ever significant other could be upsetting, despite it being such a silly thing to argue over. Taking that into consideration, you decided to tread lightly when you got home, toeing off your shoes in the entryway of his flat when you arrived almost silently. That’s when you noticed that Marc was there, not Steven.

“Hey,” he said, tipping back the beer in his hand and then holding it up, “want one?”

You shook your head, “no thanks.”

It was like Steven had a roommate. At least…that’s how it felt. Marc was the more stern one, like he was the polar opposite of Steven, but you didn’t mind. You liked the company regardless. Marc was a good guy, you could just tell. After a couple of minutes talking about the weather, the two of you managed to get into something more serious.

“You said you’ve been to therapy? Mind if I ask what for?” Marc took another swig of his beer.

“Uh, PTSD, spent a few years in the British Armed Forces and then got myself honorably discharged after…” you sniffed out a laugh, “maybe I will take that drink after all.”

After a few drinks, you and Marc were trading war stories and with it, your tales of trauma. You wondered how long it was going to take him to open up to you about why and how Steven came to be, but there Marc was, letting down his always stoic demeanor in order to open himself up to you.

He cried, and you opened your arms to him.

“No, no I told you I’m not…that’s not my thing…”

You laughed, “s’not a ‘thing’ to hug someone when they’re sad, Marc. C’mere…”

You tugged his jacket and pulled his rigid frame into your arms, wrapping them around him tightly. At first he was stiff, still mumbling some protests, but then you felt him exhale, like his entire body were a balloon being emptied of the air inside of it. That’s when the heavier sobs came, tears spilling out of his eyes and onto your forearm.

“Steven is so good, and sometimes I think it would just be best if I don’t ever come out. Sometimes I think that the world would be a better place without me in it,” he said between heavy cries. He looked up at you, “Steven could be happy, and be with you all the time and–”

“Steven would miss you, Marc,” you looked into his eyes, seeing the pain he felt just made you want to hold him closer, but you knew that would only make it more awkward.

You didn’t have to worry about feeling awkward though, because he leaned up and slotted his lips over yours all on his own. You pulled back in surprise, wondering if he did that by mistake or not, or if Steven had decided to come back when you didn’ notice.

“S-Steven?” You asked, looking between his eyes rapidly.

He shook his head, “no, still me,” he said breathlessly, looking down at your mouth before pulling you in again.

You smiled against his lips, “how unexpected.”

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