#loads of potential that's really exciting to me tbh

[byanyan]

@apexulansis sent: 🕴 👨‍🏫 perhaps ……. (from Ardaka, obvs)

relationship prompts ✧ * º • accepting

🕴: partners in illegal activities 👨‍🏫: one muse is a teacher/mentor for the other muse

yes, i'm SO here for this that it's ridiculous.

byan is, in every verse (but especially their space orphan verse), very directionless. having someone willing to mentor them could do them a lot of good, and having someone like ardaka take them under his wing could potentially be that much more beneficial for them. byan would be in it for the violence, of course — the idea of learning the trade of bounty hunting from one of the most well known names in the business would be something they'd have a hard time turning down. there's so much more than that which they could learn from him though, things that could potentially help them in the direction of a better path than the one they're on — things like patience, the fact that empathy & compassion aren't a weakness, etc., which they'd be more willing to listen to when it comes from someone like ardaka, someone who tries to do good without necessarily worrying about being lawful. —and someone who, honestly, i could see them looking up to a lot with a bit of time. if he has the patience to put up with them, i think they'd do pretty well under his mentorship.

[becca-e-barnes]

Hey lovely! I love your work so much honestly you’re absolutely amazing! I was just wondering if you’d ever write anything for sbf!bucky again? I re read your work about him all the time and I’m a little bit of a whore for him 😅 no pressure whatsoever, it’s just that sweet baby has my heart 🥺

Sbf!Bucky has been really heavily requested recently and now I feel like I've been neglecting him 😩 I really enjoy writing him and it lets me dabble in my dream of being a milf some day

But I feel like he has a real sweet tooth. He's a dessert guy, 110%. Not like your husband or your son.

From the very first Sunday that your son brought Bucky over for dinner, he's been so into your desserts because a good dessert is something he's really missed during his last couple of years at college. It doesn't even really matter what you make, every week he tells you it's even better than whatever you made the Sunday before.

The store bought, dry cakes he sometimes treats himself to don't even come close to the fluffy sponges you make for him. He tells you your lemon meringue is better than the one his aunt used to make and your pies are probably a cure for sadness. He exaggerates but at least he sounds sincere.

And it's nice. It's nice that he appreciates your effort. It's nice that your desserts actually get eaten and enjoyed. It's nice that you're not sitting at the dinner table alone after lunch. Company is nice. Compliments are nice.

"I know it's late but I don't want you to think I'd forgotten." You made yourself busy in the kitchen, talking a little louder so Bucky could still hear you in the dining room. He usually helped you plate up dessert but not today.

"What are you talking about?" Bless him, he sounded so confused. "I can give you a hand if you like?"

"No, it's okay. Close your eyes." You thought your instruction was clear enough but Bucky still protested.

"Just close your eyes, Buck." You could've sworn you felt him raise his eyebrows but he did as he was told anyway.

You set the plate in front of him and laid a little dessert fork above his placemat. "I know your birthday was last Tuesday but I thought we could still celebrate it today. You're only 24 once." Bucky opened his eyes to the most mouth watering slice of chocolate cake he swore he'd ever seen in his life.

Two thick layers of moist chocolate sponge with a rich chocolate icing in between. The cake must have been heated for a couple of minutes, making the icing warm enough to make the layers slide slightly. Thick, warm chocolate sauce rolled down the sides, taking with it a light dusting of powdered sugar, almost washing away the single lit birthday candle. The plate was decorated with a perfect scoop of cool vanilla ice cream and some fresh strawberries, left overnight in a teaspoonful of sugar to draw out their juice.

"You didn't need to make a whole cake just for me!" His genuine excitement was heartwarming, quickly blowing out his candle before wax melted onto his dessert.

"Sweetheart, I make a whole cake just for you every week. Happy birthday." You lifted the little dessert fork, slicing through the sponge with it, making sure to add a little ice cream and a slice of strawberry before raising it to his lips.

You could swear he actually moans when the cake passes his lips. He makes the same noise at dessert every Sunday and you swear you never get tired of hearing it. It's so close to the noise he makes when he first sinks inside you and God, that sound is beautiful.

Your foot grazes his leg, gently but deliberately and there's a battle going on behind those eyes when he takes the fork from his own mouth. On one hand, your husband is in the next room, sitting beside your son, Bucky's best friend. On the other hand, Bucky needs you to know how much he appreciates this. Appreciates you. And if he's honest with himself, your husband and son being so close has never stopped him before.

"Fuck, you've ruined me." He groans, pressing his lips to yours in a hurry. Somehow you manage to stifle your surprise, catching up when he presses you back onto the dining room table.

"You and those fucking desserts. It's not fair. You get me half hard during dinner and then you feed me the best chocolate cake I've ever had? Do you know how unfair that is?" His hands are all over you, pulling your skirt up in between frantic kisses.

The chocolate cake is all but forgotten, the ice-cream left to melt while Bucky kisses your neck before he tugs your panties off, tucking them into the back pocket of his jeans.

[chanderlona]

AHHAGSGSGG HIII I'M SOO SORRY FOR NOT TALKINF HEREEE. i. hate my data i cant opem tumblr 💔💔💔

anywaysss i have created more art and who do you know? 🤭🤭

GRGGEHAHHXAHHDHSNCJJS IM CRYING AND SHAKING HE'S GETTING THE LOVE HE DESERVESSSS

I LOVE MARBLE BREAD SO MUCH 💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

ahem okay so let me just say things about the update priview from yesterday

THE

THE GJE THE THE THE

THE HE ‼️‼️‼️ HE FINALLY GOT HIS OWN CUTSCENES IM SO HAPPY FOR HIM 😭😭😭💞💞💞🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 like honestly he's the only (named) NPC who didnt have one in his reveal and i was pretty sad cause he could really use one...... /vvvvvvpos

from what i assume here..... i think the loading screen will be split into 2—one for tomorrow that has Schneeball and this one with Marble Bread for the 2nd half of the update.

either way just.... look at him..... he finally got his own spotlight...... *sobs

i remember when i said he's such a missed potential... now look at him.... he grew.... /silly

also also i dont know if i'm the one who's forgetting something in Operation TimeFixers, but honestly i'm REALLY surprised that he's the head, the BOSS, of the division he's in (Facility Management Division).

if it is jusy established recently than i'm so proud of him AAAAANAHHDHHSHFB 😭😭😭🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💞💞💞💞💞 (also tbh he looks so soo SOOOO cool i love his costume so much, its a must need for me right after xylitol's costume)

the update is like tomorrow morning i might not able to play it immedietly sadly...... but i'm still so so excited that we get to be in the TBD againnn i miss everyone there (except dark fondue cause i have a beef with her /lh)

AAAANDDDD that allll have a great day/night :]]]] have a free capcut template usage!!!!

[dnalt-d2]

QSMP has Ended, but What Do I Think, and What Will I Do?

(Probably my last long post for a while, so heyyyyyy)

So…QSMP is over

OR IS IT?????

(I don't know for sure and I don't think anyone else does right now either tbh I'll circle back to this)

So the day started 10 mins earlier than I fucking expected because no one said anything about a QSMP Info Stream, so I slept through that stuff about D.R.A.G.O.N. But I have since seen it and oh boy

I hurt about it

Maybe

To start with, they listed Chayanne and Lullah as deceased, even though as far as we know, they're eternally asleep in Rose's Garden. Did the Feds just list them as deceased because they couldn't find them? Probably maybe idk what am I a cop??? I do know that Richas probably actually died and that fuckin sucks. RIP little dude. Your chaotic energy WILL be missed, sincerely

Now the rest of the surviving Eggs (possibly sans Dapper and Pomme for BBH/their own Lore reasons) to be left in cryogenic stasis. I will return to this point later

BECAUSE THEN THE HORRORS, FINALLY

Everyone got loaded up into a plane to go somewhere, but crashed before arriving, leaving everyone to gather plane parts and survive numerous Code Monsters. RIP Etoiles, you and your badass sword/shield would've loved QSMP Horror

Also, since I didn't mention it, we got some strange occurences with some of the people. Fit got deported, RIP to him as well, and replaced with local Heterochromatic/Possibly Homophobic Catboy Madagio. Pac became PacOvo, or whatever they were calling him, I think I missed that part. And Mike is a straight-up zombie. Dude lost his eyes at one point, I saw it myself, it was fuckin wild. Also Max showed up. And I'm not sure he did much to explain that. I do know he seemed to trauma-bond with Bad about their mutual Nuke-related deaths. Wouldn't be the first thing they trauma-bonded about, I'm sure

And then BACK TO THE HORRORS

So they managed to fix the plane, only to be told that the Codes are a product of a virus in long-forgotten plot-point SOFIA, and they needed to destroy her in order to destroy them and the Feds, much to Max's (and for some reason Quackity's) dismay. But they still basically ripped her apart and did the thing anyway, and they managed to essentially destroy the island. I think. Or they just escaped? I'm gonna be real, I'm not 100% sure on whatever happened there, it's been a hot minute and I'm tired

Either way, we were then met with a montage of numerous moments on the QSMP, and then an ominous Number 2, which has some…Interesting implications…

Now I've never been part of the DSMP fandom, but I still kinda feel like this has the same vibes of DSMP Season 2. And by that I mean that right now, I'm sure there are intentions to continue eventually, once things behind the scenes are sufficiently sorted out, much like how DSMP was initially intended to continue. That's likely why they left the surviving Eggs in a state that possibly leaves them open to continuation. However, I think we also all need to keep in mind that things could potentially not be sorted out

This doesn't mean don't be excited, I know I am. But I do think we need to keep our expectations in check, just in case we get a different announcement. There is always the possibility that things went too far in the wrong direction, and course-correction just isn't feasible

Once again, I wanna say just how happy I am to have been here for all this. I was there on the first day of QSMP, just by pure coincidence, and I have been here ever since, all the way to the end. I don't regret that in the slightest, and I am super glad to have seen the community it fostered here. I'm not quite social enough to have been able to make friends the way a lot of you have, but nevertheless, I am really happy to have been along for the ride. For me, I think it was that I kept seeing some of the same names in the feed, and in my notifications. That made me really happy, seeing all of you

So Thanks Quackity, Thanks Admins, Egg-Related or Not, Thanks QSMP Creators from all over the world, and of course, Thanks QSMPblr, for making this an incredible experience

Now as for this blog…

I'll admit I made this side-blog as primarily QSMP-related, while also hoping to talk about my other fandom interests sporadically, maybe do some fanart. But then suddenly people started following me???

Like actually wanting to hear what I have to say apparently???? And that blew my mind, but also made me too anxious to start posting other fandom stuff because "That's not what these guys are here for, what if they get annoyed, etc." Just that typical social anxiety fun stuff that lives in the void where my brain once was

But at this point, I'm probably gonna belay that entirely, and start finally ranting about other things here like I've been holding off on for a while. Might even just do an art dump of random stuff that I just made and never did anything with. So uh, if anyone who followed me doesn't wanna see that…Sorry. I just don't want this blog to die entirely, if I'm being honest

I do have a project I'm hoping to work on, and I might do some progress reports over here, but if not, and you're still curious, I also have my main blog [@dna-d2] that I would be on otherwise. Idk if I'm gonna go to posting there primarily, hard to say. But that's the thing about the future. You can think all you want about how it's gonna go, but in the end, it only takes a moment to decide what will actually happen. Did that actually mean anything?? Was it actually profound????? Or am I just tired and hungry at 3 in the morning?? YOU DECIDE, THAT'S THE MAGIC OF NONSENSE

AND SO, QSMPBLR AND ALL OTHERS WHO MAY SEE THIS

IT IS NOT A FAREWELL

BUT A SEE YOU LATER

So yeah

See you later

[darrys-laundry]

1, 20, 53 - any or all three for the ask game, whatever you feel like answering!

1. favorite place to write

tbh i mostly write in bed, for some reason i was ON FIRE when i was living in LA, but part of that may have been a) i was still in classes, so i had no choice but to write (i wrote a stranger things season five spec script, which, imo is basically fanfiction for my last tv writing class) and b) when i wasn’t working on the aforementioned spec script, i was writing ted lasso fic and the show was still actively airing. but yeah, all this to say, i usually write in bed, on my phone, in google docs.

20. post a snippet of a WIP you’re working on

“Babes,” Keeley says, sinking down onto the edge of the bed beside him, “it’s my job to know you lot better than you know yourselves. I mean, the amount of PR nightmares I’m prepared to tackle would keep you both awake at night.”

“...We’re a PR nightmare?” Jamie says quietly, almost crushed, and Keeley’s quick to squeeze his hand.

“No,” she backtracks, “Roy killin’ you is a PR nightmare.”

Roy hums then, intrigued, “You’ve thought about me killing him?”

“You’ve only threatened to do it a million times.” Keeley reasons.

from chapter five of there’s a magic there (in chicago)

53. what does writing mean to you?

oh god, this feels like such a loaded question. i don’t even know what writing means to me really, i just know that i can’t imagine not writing for the rest of my life? i graduated with a degree in tv writing, and i hope to do that one day once ive finished paying off school! i have some original ideas, but i got my start writing in fanfiction, right? that’s where my passions lie. i’d love to work on an adaptation, or jump into a show that’s already a couple seasons in. that’s what excites me about things like the new percy jackson show, or the potential for a ted lasso spin off.

ask me about my writing!

[elegyofthemoon]

hurry before my hotspot shits itself again asldfjah

Successfully executed an escape route/plan out of work so my director doesn't catch me not working but also it sounds like she kinda suspects me anyways for not showing up anyways. My response?: 🤷🏼‍♂️🤷🏼‍♂️

GOT TO SEE SOOOOOO MANY DAFFODILS ON MY WAY THROUGH THE ESCAPE ROUTE.... In a very very silly overly romantic view, running off and seeing daffodils felt like a sign that "a new beginning was coming" and that was very nice ! Even despite the freezing rain ☺️(my hands were so cold)

I pushed myself to finaaaally send a small voice acting clip to my friend at home. Originally, I was making it a goal to do some clips every other week for my friend, but I was so drained that I couldn't even enjoy doing it, but now that we're in a "giving no fucks" zone, we having a good time 😎happy

I started looking into jobs back home I could do and that's been nice! I hate applications but also just realizing that there's so much I can explore and do is loads of fun tbh alskdjf so much potential

Uhhh I finished one art thing this morning before the meeting with my director which was so nice ( /u\) happy about that and got to share it with my friends

OH my friend and I were talking a bit about ff//7 and how we both had wanted to revisit the game again since it's been a while and for x reasons, we both got eeked out from touching the series again, but that conversation eventually led to us making plans to play it together once I get back home and I'm !! because I think she first started the idea of playing the game and I was like "omg and it'd be fun too to try voice acting it too!" and she's also big on voiceacting!! It's been a while since I've had a partner with voiceacting so we were both really excited about it ahhhh things to look forward to !!

I don't remember anything else. I actually have to start writing on my phone things that make me happy because I always forget aslkdjfahl so that's a plus askdjfhl

[fadebolt]

Personal room ranking:

1 - Chimney Canopy: C07 (9/10) 2 - Silent Construct: A11 (8/10) 3 - Silent Construct: A40 (8/10) 4 - Icy Monument: B12 (7/10) 5 - Industrial Complex: A14 (7/10) 6 - Outskirts: A07 (6/10) 7 - Outer Expanse: RUIN25 (6/10) 8 - Silent Construct: A13 (5/10) 9 - Outskirts: CAVE03 (5/10) 10 - Farm Arrays: A06 (4/10)

Extra comment: Honestly, this one isn't as exciting. Most of these are decent, but I didn't really find them super memorable, with the exception of C07 (and perhaps A14, due to me going there a lot, even if the room is nothing special). My list also only has two relatively small and simple rooms for this, so I'll cover them real quick.

The first is A07, a room that can either be super fun or super annoying, depending on your luck that day. However, this place does clearly follow the Outskirts design principles, and gives you more than enough options to deal with the threats you'll find here… as well as Mushrooms, which can actually come in really handy around this general area. You can absolutely get an unfair moment or two in here, but for the most part, this place functions relatively well, hence the positive rating.

And the second is A13, which… hey wait a minute, didn't I also cover the Shaded Citadel version of this thing? Eh, whatever, this isn't the only room that had multiple versions appear on the list, and the last few rounds will involve a lot of 'looking through and comparing different versions of the same rooms', anyway so I might as well get used to it. And does it get better on Saint's campaign? Well, not really, if I'm being honest. The platforming of this place is very straightforward, so the tongue really doesn't do much, and the visuals are basically the same, except that things are little whiter (and tbh, I prefer the looks of the original). So yeah, I don't have anything new to add, except that I accidentally noticed a face in this one too (just turn on geometry and zoom in on that hole near the eastern exit…. yeah, ever since that one Sky Islands room, I now can't stop seeing these things… someone help.... please....).

Well, since today's rooms weren't all that exciting, let's spice things up with some bonus rooms that are ironically more interesting than the two I just went over. Starting with:

Another Saint room, B07 from Icy Monument! This one is a tad tricky to rate, because it's one of those places where Saint can't really make great use of its mobility, despite there being a bunch of aggressive creatures. The nearby area in general is kind of filled with a ton of spawns, but for the other rooms, it works, because your mobility is exceptionally good there, letting you traverse those rooms in ways that a Survivor or Hunter could only dream of. But B07 is unfortunately one of those rooms. That background is still wonderful, and way nicer to look at than the original, which is enough to boost this to a 6/10, but I really don't think it deserves anything higher than that.

And for the final one of today, we have a rarity, a Ruin room from Outer Expanse that actually failed, RUIN03 This fact might appear weird at first, since this is genuinely good and unique room, and when it comes to OE, even the average ones usually end up making it. But the explanation is simple - it had to face the Random Gods Room (the first thinner one, specifically)…… yeah. So I firmly believe that this would have absolutely performed well if it didn't get an unfair matchup. I mean, just look at it, in what other room can you see colors like this? Not to mention, it has a very interesting layout that is sort of tricky in a fun way, as well as some Noodleflies for folks who are feeling daring that day (though OE is absolutely loaded with food, so just.... don't). Yeah, this one's an 8/10, potentially even a 9. Maybe there's a little bias going on here, especially since RUIN25 got a bunch of votes, which I didn't rate very high, but I just think this one's more creative (though RUIN25 is also solid enough, of course).

Pick Your Favorite Rain World Room, Day 238 R2

This is not single elimination! Every room with at least 15.0% vote will move on to the next round.

There is a hidden slugcat in one of the rooms (they can be in any color). If u can see it comment or reblog with where they are and if u are first, u get a cookie!

Credit for game screenshots goes to: Rain World Interactive Map, Rain World Wiki and me

Congratulations for day 237.1 and 237.2 winners!

[dramarants]

soundtrack no. 1 first impressions: (okay more like rambling to avoid work)

 the leads are beautiful, the cinnamontography is beautiful, and surprise surprise the ost is beautiful too

they’re revealing a lot from the pilot episode which is kinda exciting cuz it’s laying it out for us that sun woo likes her, has considered pursuing a romantic relationship, and now might be willing to try again/explore his own feelings more, while eunsoo has explicitly said she’s not interested in that cuz she doesn’t wanna risk their friendship. since it’s already out there, there’s a lot more places the plot can go and hopefully they’ll get creative and deep and angsty and yearning with it while maintaining a steady pace forward

I don't want noble idiocy pls, make our boy obviously try to flirt but it goes over her head bc she’s so comfortable with him or homegirl teases him and he boldly reciprocates, leaving her kinda stunned and flustered bc she didn't expect it and now she’s feeling some feelings 😂

praying for general emotional maturity and no constant teen tantrums moving forward

cohabitation!! the trope of tropes!! 🤩

at first I was like wait what? he’s moving in just cuz she asked for helping with writing, not some unavoidable disaster involving property damage? but then it just means sun woo is doing it bc he wants to and he KNOWS he wants to and that’s juicy 😏

did I mention they’re pretty?

this feels like it’s gonna be a predictable show with the potential to surprise us but tbh I'm not mad about it, it’s okay to turn your brain off sometimes and watch something simple and little indulgent (I have a feeling the casual touches and heart eyes hyungshik’s already shooting are gonna be pivotal in distracting me from the void left by 25 21)

I'm terrible at predictions but here’s my guesses and let’s see what comes true: sunwoo’s exhibition is gonna be loads of images of sohee where everyone praises “wow you can feel the love the photographer has for the subject, what a special bond they have” “you captured [type of relationship that they definitely aren’t] so well!” 

“composer guy asked me to write a saucy song about the thrill of eros what do I do” “oh well you know-” *grabs hand* “your heart starts to beat” *fixes hair* “your breath gets faster” *moves closer* - OKAY I’M NOT TRYING TO WRITE FANFIC YOU GET WHAT I MEAN

jealousy trope! for both of them! not the biggest fan of it but it fits the narrative, maybe the idol she’s writing for and a friend from his time abroad? tbh the composer is prolly gonna fall for her but that’s really ick

at least one “tell me about Jennifer” “shut up” *smiles esoterically* moment every week for the first half of the show

drunk kiss or drunk confession or drunk grey area something from eunsoo 

eunsoo’s big break song is gonna be a confession song and she’s gonna sing it in front of ppl while making direct eye contact with sun woo in the audience

or maybe a proposal song that gets them thinking about marriage and how domestic they are?

eunsoo confides in the restaurant couple about her changing feelings

eunsoo’s def gonna write a song about missing sun woo after the two weeks

stuffed animal gift from sun woo

more Vincenzo actors popping up

ep 1 score: 6/10 story, 9/10 visuals, 7/10 overall enjoyment 👍

[kendochick-moor]

While #1 oldest child is still battling their way out of Hades, you get an update from me. Unfortunately, no fic updates yet, but I may get desperate and just use my phone this weekend to see if a 200-page Google doc will load on it. :)

As for what's been happening around here:

- officially have use of both my legs again

- blood clot has officially been deemed No Longer A Threat to my immediate health

- no hemorrhages for nearly 8 weeks!

- I get to stop my blood thinner injections after my current prescription runs out (yay, no more track marks across my stomach for swimsuit season, lol)

- yes, I know the last two contradict each other; yes, it has been a complete show with many ER and hospital visits since March

- still waiting to hear back about why I randomly stop breathing, but I keep kicking back so, eh, could be worse?

- we removed our deck.

- By force.

- because masons fixed $15k worth of damage/wear on our house (including rebuilding our chimney) last week (had to say 'no' to so many things over the past year in order to save up for that. My car hasn't moved from the garage since October. I don’t think it runs anymore, tbh)

- worked out our financial plan update with our advisor

- currently working on our mortgage renewal (so, so fortunate that our financial advisor is giving us tips)

- kids are almost done school for the season

- #1 son has started singing lessons

- i got a promotion at work and start my new job on the 28th of this month (a little more than a week!)

- new job will NOT have anywhere near the OT i am used to working, so hopefully this means a healthier lifestyle for me soon.

- I'm... wishing I felt happier/more excited about the new position, but I know my current team is really going to be hit hard because of the timing. My team has all responded to the announcement with "mixed feelings".

- Doreto is doing great 👍

- next week is my last week of FT in my current job, though I will still be helping the team PT through July

- second dose of Vax is due next weekend

- my lilies are blooming in the garden, and somehow, a single sunflower seed snuck into that patch so now there's this umbrella-like plant growing taller and looming protectively over them like something out of a Ghibli movie

- while I am in terrible physical shape from the last 8 months or so, after a lot of work, I hauled ass to get myself into a better place at my job, got the house fixed up, confirmed our family would not die destitute (at least not as long as we stick to our budget and live a bit thrifty), threw a birthday party weekend for #1 son and soon, for #1 oldest child, too (16!?!?! Wtf, when did they grow up!?!?), and told my broke ass body to suck it up because I still have too much shit to do.

- thank the gods for #1 hubby being a rock through all of this

- literally #1 hubby to me: fucking unkillable (affectionate)

This past week was a return to OT (and 12- and 13-hour days) and this coming week will be worse... but this may be it for some time after. Possibly. We will see. New job will be... a shift from what I currently do.

But the team i am moving to is also incredible, and I really want to do my best and impress, so fingers crossed that this coming week i don't burn myself right out finishing everything for my current job. (Because I don't want to leave a mess for my current team to deal with.) So, hopefully my last 65-hour week!!

Anyway, yeah. Been a show here. Had to focus my attention to move up instead of trudging through. ^^;;

... because new job puts me in a position to potentially help my entire (current) team from a higher level up, if I play my cards right.

.... which, ugh, means I need to get myself back in physical shape ASAP, because I am going to have to use charm and schmoozing skills, and actually style my hair so people take me seriously. And brush up on my languages. And...

Argh.

Anyway, this is why I have been AWOL.

Adulting for the greater good. Or, trying.

Time for a new game, I suppose.

How have you been, fam?

[formulatrash]

What are your thoughts on fanfic writing in the f1 fandom? I am pretty sure I saw you tweet about it at some point something small but I was too scared to interact with you on it over at twitter :D

So, this is a hotter topic than I’d really like it to be on my Tumblr and it’s my own fault but. Here we go.

RPF has some questionable ethics and some even more questionable origins. I’m ancient enough that it just used to get straight-up published as a ‘5 minute fantasy’ in young women and girls’ magazines where you’d get like, some 15 year old’s daydream about meeting a boyband member on holiday and falling in love and this was for some reason just treated as an absolutely normal bit of publishing not like ‘what the hell, that would be illegal’ and ‘why is this the fantasy we are encouraging girls to have as an ambition when it comes to sports or even pop success’ and y’know. 

Anyway, the 90s: really can’t emphasise enough how fucking weird having only a few sources to get your media from makes them.

Back to RPF; its roots are in political obscenity, if you want to talk about the bawdy stuff. The French Revolution, in particularly, wrote lots of erotica (the kinkier the better) about the royal family as part of refusing to acknowledge their divine rights under the church. It was an anarchical refusal to accept the situation as it was and to undermine it. 

Beyond that you’ve got historical fiction - Thucydides was all about working up a really good narrative take* on the Peloponnesian war back in the fifth century BC. Extra scenes, big dialogue, you know. If he’d known about self-lubricating buttholes then you BET Herodotus would have put them in the Histories.

Point is: writing fiction about real people isn’t really that weird, Shakespeare did a load of it. But we tend to problematise RPF and consider it strange, even amongst fanfiction.

Now, to 21st century sports and specifically F1. We speak here on Tumblr dot com, the audience where F1 fans skew most largely LGBT, non-cis and female or non binary rather than every other platform which is full of cis het men. Here is where we talk about fanfic. Because they don’t know we’re here, I assume, is the logic.

(they kinda don’t, to be fair)

Most of us do not see ourselves in sports. Most sports media is not aimed at the way that a lot of us were socialised to engage with stuff and most of us - lucky buggers like me aside - do not get to write the narratives of the way sport is engaged with or talked about or who does it. 

A lot of us who live here on god’s abandoned internet have drifted in and out of fandoms and a lot of that will have involved engaging with fanfiction. Fanfiction is a really fun sandbox to play in, as an adult - we get told to stop playing, as we grow up and it’s no surprise that we still want to. 

There’s a six monthly cycle of some AAA game that asks the question “is shooting people bad?” that prompts 10 broadsheet newspaper pieces on Videogames: Not Just For Kids Anymore (and sub in comics/superheroes/etc for games there) that makes everyone who knows that roll their eyes. Games and comics and superheroes are big, legitimised industries now that turnover hundreds of billions of dollars.

Fanfiction is an outlier, as the purest form of play in a lot of senses. Unfettered, it’s the democratic media platform; there’s no minimum standard for publishing, there’s no real limits beyond your own ethics on what you can publish. it doesn’t turn a profit, by its very definition and it allows lots of games and versions of itself within that. 

For something with a ludicrously broad definition that encapsulates hugely different types of works, it has defined forms; from drabbles to wingfic, as structural formats, we also recognise fluff or hurt/comfort as genre. Fanfiction isn’t really the thing itself, it’s the bookshop and what you find in it will vary on where you look and often, the advice of the bookseller or friends you speak to.

If you’ve enjoyed wandering that bookstore and adding to its shelves as part of the way you engage with media and then you come to a sports fandom? Well, you’re gonna look for the fic. If you don’t see yourself in the sport, as a woman or a queer person then you can write yourself in. It’s sad that we sideline the fantasies where we exist - given they’re entirely normal to have - into places where we jealously guard them away from the reality we daren’t intrude on but that is how it is.

And fuck: if your whole reason for liking F1 is cus you wanna marry a driver and you’re writing those 15 minute fantasies about them like you’re 15 and they’re a poster then it’s not doing any harm - it’s a lot healthier than stalking them. You might even work out what you really want or more things about yourself, in the process.

(if it’s ‘to marry an F1 driver’ then I suggest you take some boring swimwear snaps somewhere that looks expensive, stick ‘em on Insta and wait for the DM slide)

One of the things I like best in fanfic is the possibility of a queer narrative without complications, of telling queer stories without having to justify them as Issues, of letting us see ourselves and our own awakenings because fuck, you know the big book shop (if such things still exist) has one shelf of expensive, niche published novels you find difficult to related to and three sex ed books.

F1 fanfic was one of the ways I wandered back to the F1 fandom and one of the reasons I work in the industry now. It was enough of an in to make me want to really think, to have that new crush energy of obsession and enjoyment, about motorsport in a way I’d drifted away from as I felt sidelined from the sport through my early-to-mid 20s. I found brocedes much more compelling, as an interpretation and a way of processing the intense rivalry between Lewis and Nico - even knowing it was fictional conjecture - than I did the equally fictional conjecture about their psychological states and potential weaknesses published in the sports papers.

So, yes, I have read some excellent Formula 1 RPF. I have written some frankly mediocre and in retrospect very poorly edited F1 RPF that I posted to Twitter in a drunken moment of excitement because I was happy I’d finished it and forgot, idk. I have a tricky relationship to being a Notable Person I guess, I hadn’t intended any harm and was mostly worried I’d get flack from the industry. Lol. Anyway, only saying it cus like; this isn’t just me talking about things theoretically.

There’s a lot of F1 RPF that is more insightful than a lot of columns about ‘inside the drivers’ minds’ working off very little more than the RPF is.

Some of it, I won’t lie, I find really fucking weird but I guess like, that ain’t for me. There are a lot of problems with RPF - it’s too male, too frequently misogynist, too keen to reinforce homophobic ideas, too often white and blonde, not radical enough but those issues are for the advanced class rather than the 101 overview I was aiming for here and go well beyond F1 or RPF.

Shit I should be writing the weather report. Fuck. I’m the worst. Err, there you go, that’s a whole thing.

(I don’t read very much - I am busy af - but occasionally and especially on long haul flights when the idea of anything other than soothing is impossible)

*Actually tbh Thucydides couldn’t write for fuck but it was early and you know how when a tag’s young you’ll read a lot of mediocre stuff?

[tirednotflirting]

okay okay okay let's do it. 4, 24, 25, 26, 35, and 39 bc you deserve to be nice to yourself. yes i read the entire list of questions. give me your answers at your leisure love you the most xoxo bella

lol thnk you my love u are Right i just forget that sometimes <3

okie dokie here we go:

4. Link your three favorite fics right now.

heck yeah okay RIGHT NOW? okay.

i have been LOVING ! off the wall by @ilovegolden from the very beginning. warped tour au is a god tier au, alright? i love how the whole thing is so romanticized by everyone who was ever involved in it, especially as someone who never got to go it brings me a lot of joy. the characters in this are all so vibrant and bright and i wanna be their best friend and also just give them a hug (and probably a nap and shower lol). the detail in this is so special and carefully crafted like i feel the love in it. i read so little harry fic nowadays like keeping up with this has made me so nostalgic too. really looking forward to where this guy goes :)))

(i stg i’m not kissing ass here) i fucking love daydream jalex (aka right now could last forever (just as long as i'm with you) like quite literally babe it’s my emotional support fic i almost have a ritual of reading this probably once a week. the story telling in this is unreal like you’re sucked into their little world from the first line where they’re throwing fucking cheese at each other. there’s so much history woven into every line like it’s wild i don’t know how you do it. there’s so much love and joy between all the characters and it’s just FUN. this fic really highlights all of the best things about your writing like i could go on for days. <3

lastly, bc i was beginning to reread it the other day, i think i’m going with the one and only britpop malum (orrrr i took a walk with my fame down memory lane (i never did find my way back) by @calumcest) (god helen your url never fails to make me giggle at least a little bit). one of my favorite things about helen’s writing is how fly on the wall i immediately feel in every scene. she shows and tells it all and i can see the lights from the show and heat liam bitching about the band and football and it’s such a good time living inside of her writing for a little while. i’m always going to hold this fic close to my heart i think after spending the entire summer sitting in the doc. (side note - it still kills me that every once in a while after reading this fic i forget the gallaghers are real people ANYWAY.) excited to get caught up on this thing i miss this little world <3

(sorry idk how to provide short answers on Anything :    )

24. What’s a trope that you’d like to never hear about as long as you live, let alone write?

see this is hard for me because i know for a fact that there are LOADS of tropes i would never want to write but i’ve read a ridiculous number of them and i’m not necessarily opposed to much (something for everybody, ya know?). i guess like a True enemies to lovers is a little bit lame and hard to do well, imo (i say true bc i almost feel like something like sugar on the asphalt - fucking fantastic and a Classic from @justanchorandhope i must say - could fall into that category except not really though bc grace probably doesn’t have the word enemy in her vocabulary, bless her heart). so okay we’ll go with that bc you probably couldn’t pay me enough to write it and i’m bored of trying to read it (said w love)

25. Do you listen to music as you write? If possible, link your writing playlist.

only if i’m writing songfic tbh! otherwise it confuses my brain. so all too well is still in my on repeat and currently it’s cornelia street (lol i rlly need THAT to go somewhere sdkfsfdjkl). i do have this playlist from when i tried writing this ashton fic last spring that went literally Nowhere but ya know good tunes. (god i came up with the coolest OCs last spring, miss them)

26. What’s your biggest distraction when writing?

oh god basically everything sldkfjsdlk i guess like i kinda just said, i cannot listen to music 95% of the time when trying to write. i wish i could but it would making 3248290x more of a headache and it also usually just gives me other ideas and then i can’t focus on the doc in front of me lol.

35. How much has writing fic changed your life?

like more than i could ever even begin to describe, dude. so i’m a stem girl, right? but when i was younger, my creativity was a lot more present and living inside my head and reading and writing little stories was so much fun. there was some kinda switch as i got older and i think those around me started preaching practicality a lot more and like, i was good in science and it was an easy route to a career and heeeeere we are. but it also meant i didn’t get any practice at being creative and i think at some point the jokes about not being good at or being allowed to be creative really got to me? so i just gave up the idea of the ideas i had ever really becoming anything. idk exactly what it was (something mixed into my conversations w helen last spring, probably) that got me to open up a doc one day and give it a shot but jesus christ, i’m so happy i did. writing fic is quite literally the biggest thing that brought me joy and community and some of the kindest souls (like yourself, miss bella) during a year that was set to be potentially pretty shitty. i wasn’t sure how i would be able to make friends in ‘adulthood’ but a creative outlet like this appears to be the answer. it’s also provided me a confidence in myself and my ability to create things that i never knew possible. like you said, i can be pretty mean to myself but like. i’m good at this. and that’s fucking cool. happy to be here.

39. What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

ya know that luke/lashton thing i wrote with a single line of dialogue? that. i pride myself on that. fkjsdlkf but really i think i’m pretty damn good at descriptive writing and i kinda dig how it’s become ~my thing~. i like showing rather than telling in my writing i think, it feels like a challenge. lemme talk about a sunset for dayyyyyys i swear i would. 

*

[ohnopoe]

first lines game

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Then tag 10 of your favorite authors!

sending loads of love to @yoditorian for tagging me in this. I love the tag games you send my way, Liz. They always seem to motivate me to actually write!

some of these are wip/drafted but not yet posted, i have hundreds of fics (wish that were a joke) but i wanted to focus on things i’ve written/worked on more recently

Main Attraction - The job was simple, well, as simple as it could be when partnered with none other than Jack Daniels himself.

Something Else - Marcus is pushing you away the moment you start to lower yourself before him.

Once Upon A Time - It was a story he knew better than any other. 

Aroma - Frankie had never really considered it before, a favourite smell; it seemed so childish.

Unexpected - If it hadn’t been for the liquor making your mind swim pleasantly, you might have been able to think of an excuse for your actions.

Personal Hero - The shrill ringing of your mobile cut through your office, sending thoughts flying in every which way at the sudden sound.

Alone, Together - The silence echoed through the command centre, holding a weight upon your chest that felt akin to drowning. 

Potential Breakup Song - Sitting there alone at the little booth you had claimed over an hour earlier certainly wasn’t how you had expected the evening to go. 

Alone - The invitations were plentiful.

Ulyc- It wasn’t just hot, no, it had surpassed hot hours ago. 

Worth The Wait - The train ride had seemed to drag on for far longer than it actually was, but then, with your excitable companion pointing out every field and creature, every car and house, it was bound to be somewhat waring. 

Do I Wanna Know (chapter one) - It was a well known fact, Jedi were not allowed to have attachments, especially relationships. 

Do I Wanna Know (chapter two) - The rules were simple. 

Do I Wanna Know (chapter three. wip) - Had he heard the way you gasped at his words? 

Untitled (unposted) - “Hi, I’m so sorry to bother you, I just wanted to come over and apologise,” well, that certainly caught the group’s attention. 

Distracted (unposted) - In all honesty, Din was distracted. 

Wrong Number (wip) - This was something new. 

Fight Club (wip) - Honestly, it wasn’t even that short.

Untitled (wip) - “You’re staring,” you didn’t even bother to open your eyes to confirm your suspicions.

Untitled (working title: Snow. wip) -  It almost seemed to float by, lighter than the air itself, dancing through the sky without aim or intent.

I... really need to open with more dialogue, in stark contrast to the lovely being who tagged me lol. And DAMN some of these are long as heck! At least there’s variety in length lol.

As for my favourite? Ooft, idk man, they’re all eh to me tbh. Probably the more descriptive ones, like Snow, Ulyc or Alone, Together, which I think might be my favourite from the weight it holds.

no pressure tags: @djarinsbeskar, @flightlessangelwings, @the-purity-pen, @bee-dameron, @maharani-radha-writes, @23orso, @engineeredfiction, @meshlamando, @remmysbounty, @codenamewitcher

[smolbeandrabbles]

Selfish Pt.7 - Sheriff of Nottingham x Reader (Robin Hood 2018)

@wltz-bby​ @happyskywhale​ #mendotagsquad

@themadtarkantaur​ - Thank you for your patience 💙💜

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6

Author’s Note: Welcome back! It’s been a while! The last time I wrote for Sheriff was that *chef’s kiss* unrepeatable masterpiece Young God.  The last time we saw these two in this series was January 13th... So yeah, overdue doesn’t even really cover it. BUT! We’re back with our Norse Shield Maiden and she’s no longer a third person reader insert! From this part we’re jumping right into 2nd person. 

TBH, it feels so good to put a banner back up there - it’s been way too long!

Disclaimer: Robin Hood has nothing to do with me / a lot of this series is now probably going to be shaped by conversations I’ve had with @mendelskrull​ / lyrics not mine

Premise: The time has finally come for you to be married, and for him to show you off to the world. Your marriage may come with rules and responsibilities, but promises power and influence to enact your own Agenda... 

Words: 8452

Warnings: Slight swears / Sheriff’s past is a regularly recurring theme (don’t wanna give it an abuse TW tag, It’s a little subtler this round) /  

______

Don't ever say your lonely Just lay your problems on me And i'll be waiting there for you The stars can be so blinding When you get tired of fighting You know the one you can look to I know its been a long night but now I'm here it's alright I don't mind walking in your shoes We'll take each step together, til you come back to center You know that i know the real you And when the vision you have gets blurry You don't have to worry i'll be your eyes That's the least i can cause when i fell You pulled me through So you know that I'll carry you, i'll carry you, i'll carry you So you know that I'll carry you, i'll carry you, i'll carry you Like you've been running for hours and can't catch your breath The demons are screaming so loud in your head Your tired you're broken you're cut and you're bruised But nothings to heavy just hold on, i'll carry you

---

This wasn’t really the wedding you had envisioned. You’d watched many friends of yours, and even you eldest brother, marry. Yet even the smallest weddings back home didn’t involve only four people.

When the Sheriff had asked you if you would let him be yours, you thought it might be a city-wide affair, perhaps even his jurisdiction wide affair. It wasn’t. It was you and he and Tuck in a room, with Marcus to witness, and a contract that said you were married. You wondered if official ink to parchment would really have the Sheriff changing his ways, or if it would all be the same still.

The day before you had gone to the Friar in the strictest confidence: “Well, Y/N, all I can really tell you is he’s not been to confessional since the last time you saw him. And I swear on it now, that wasn’t to do with infidelity.” “Then what?!” Although Wil has already told you this, you thought hearing from someone who didn’t literally spin rhetoric for a living might set things straight. Tuck seemed to indicate to Nottingham as a whole, “What with the crusades still raging so far away people are getting anxious. They want answers he doesn’t have... he needs you.” Tuck took your shoulders gently, “He needs you more than he realises he does, in fact our Sheriff will need all the supposed he can get.” “Do you think I should marry him?” “Do you have a choice? He and your father made an agreement... I don’t see a way out of this that doesn’t end in you going home; unless that’s what you aim to do?” Tuck looked concerned for a minute. He himself wasn’t ready to lose your influence on the Sheriff. “No...” It was quiet and unsure, but you knew that running away would help nothing. You’d already given yourself to him, and Wil was trying... you knew he was trying. But was trying enough? You thought about the cross-cross of scars on his back and the way that he acted in Church... about the kind of woman it would take to handle that. About what Wil must have thought of you to tell you all that he had. Not like a man who didn’t care. He’d given you control of Nottingham’s defences. He didn’t ACT like someone who wanted you to be the good obedient silent wife by his side, useful only to bare him children. Wil knew that’s not what he would be getting out of you as it was, not with your Norse heritage. If he was using you for your skills... then at least he was giving you freedom and something you wanted, that you actually enjoyed. You didn’t have to keep yourself trapped in the palace all day every day. You shook your head. “I can’t turn my back on him now.” You would have come so far, and for what? You were here to marry him. Perhaps when that was fulfilled you would know a different man. Your parents always said everything is different when you’re married... but you weren’t sure there was ever any indication it was positive. Still, as you stood beside him and Tuck read out some verses for you to repeat – in all honesty you had no idea what you were saying, just that they sounded vaguely like vows – you couldn’t help but feel the nervous knots in your stomach. This wasn’t a real marriage; heck it wasn’t even a real wedding. But you were convincing yourself that it was one. This certificate would tell the Church you were married. It’d tell The King you were married… and your family… But that wasn’t what was really happening. The Sheriff was fulfilling a contractual obligation. He’d made your father a promise, and Wil was making good on that. You on the other hand weren’t even sure anything would change. But you hoped against hope that it would… That he would love you, exactly as he had done before. The fact that it wasn’t a ‘real’ wedding also explained why Askel wasn’t present, although you supposed that he would go mad knowing that you’d done this in relative secrecy. You were also aware of what he’d report back to your father, and you weren’t sure you wanted that eventuality either. It didn’t last long and there were no rings. Yet there was also no hesitation in the Sheriff’s signature as he flowed the quill neatly across the parchment, before handing it to you with a sweet smile. A smile that made your heart skip, and you shivered as his hand touched yours; and then you thought if you hesitated… what would that mean? How would Wil react to such a thing? You didn’t want to hurt him; he’d been through enough… But you were signing away your life here. Potentially your freedom too, although you doubted it. Why would he give you so much only to take it away now? The quill scratched across the parchment with your own name – which gave you your own pause. Did you get a title now? Did you take his name? Did it feel right for either in such a strange setting. You looked to Marcus – and the look on his face. How excited he was – it surprised you, and coupled with how eagerly he took the quill from you to witness, you found yourself smiling again. You took a deep breath; this was the start of your real journey. The prospect, the very inference, of being married to him carried with it responsibility. You were determined to live up to it. Askel wasn’t just mad. He was outraged, and you were glad your new husband was attending to official duties when he caught you. Even gladder that no one else in the palace would have had as good a grip on Norse as you, considering the insults that were being traded: “-ARE YOU AN IDIOT!?! HOW COULD YOU JUST GO AND GET MARRIED!?! HOW CAN YOU JUST SWEAR YOURSELF TO A GOD LIKE THEIRS!?!” “THAT’S WHAT I’M HERE FOR!! THAT’S WHAT OUR FATHER AGREED TO!” “If he KNEW what he’d agreed to, you wouldn’t have been getting married. Why can’t he give you a REAL wedding? What, he doesn’t want all of Nottingham there?! Or the whole jurisdiction lining the streets-!? That’s how it SHOULD be!!” “Well maybe we will!!” “That’s a load of shit – you don’t even know what you’ve got yourself into, Y/N! You should have come to ME!” “So you could tell me NO!? So you could go to our father-!?! Wil is opening the trade ways, I’ve seen the official notifications for the beginnings of our people trading here!” Another tick in the box for the Sheriff, as that was also a part of the deal made; “Why are you acting like this-!?! Like my feelings don’t matter-!?” Your brother’s eyes narrowed, it was a cheap shot, and you both knew it. To Askel the way you felt about the situation was the only thing that mattered at all; “WHY!? Why would you do it!?” “BECAUSE I LOVE HIM!” That felt weird to say, it wasn’t even a sentence you had to think about. And it hit you like a ton of bricks. Love? Did you? To say it in such a way? You swallowed hard and knew fear had crossed your face, flickering in your eyes. You weren’t sure Askel could see passed his own blind rage. “I don’t CARE if you love him. Does he love you!?” It wasn’t a question you could answer.

 *** You no longer had a room. You had a husband. And an ‘our’ room. (For the record, your brother was not happy. But managed to hold his tongue.) The space in actuality was minimal; a bed, and a desk that you’d noted before, a mirror, and wardrobe space, (cupboards and drawers of varying sizes but all the same colour and wood style.) a few chests and a modesty screen. Minimalist, but everything matched. The crest of Nottingham stood out in blue and grey, hanging above his bed; cross and three crowns. Which meant moving your own things in here wasn’t exactly hard; you weren’t lacking for room. But you wanted to make sure that nothing disturbed the aesthetic he’d worked so hard to attain. You spent a lot of time standing in the doorway and thinking hard, and you must have looked it. Wil stayed with you, working from here instead of the usual room you found him in. “Y/N, darling, if you stand there all day you’ll start growing roots…” He shuffled through papers as he crossed the room, and you enjoyed the amused little smile on his face. “I just want to make sure that I don’t ruin your good work.” He scoffed, turning those blue eyes from his work to you, “These are your chambers too, now, do with them what you will.” Wil placed his papers down and strolled to you, taking you in his arms, “You will, if anything, make it a home.” “You say that, Sheriff, but I am well aware of safe spaces. And I wish to make sure yours still IS one.” No matter what happened between you now, knowing what you knew he’d already been through your only wish was to make sure it never happened again. Wil moved his hands to frame your face, his unreadable – eyes delicate; “You know what I think?” Your lips parted but you didn’t answer, not by the look in his eyes, the feeling of his touch. “You think too much.” The Sheriff knew you were about to protest that, so immediately moved to kiss you; you wouldn’t deny him that. You hadn’t had a wedding night, per se, kissing him like this was as good as either of you had given. In fact you were a little impartial to sharing a bed with him at all. You had done it before, and you didn’t want his impression to be that you hadn’t enjoyed it. But you were cautious. He was your husband as your equal, and you weren’t going to do this any other way. Wil’s lips left yours and he pulled you back tighter to him, resting his head on yours; “Please, I want you to make this whatever you want. Don’t worry about me.” He’d failed to realise that was the only thing you were going to do. But the Sheriff chuckled, “I think I need some redecorating!” You did it slowly, and everything you did you asked for his opinion on. But you worked hard, and got through all of your work quickly just so you could get back to fix something up and surprise him. It was one of the things you loved most – the smile on his face as you eagerly waited for him to spot what you’d changed. Your rounds got easier, and splitting them between Marcus, Askel and yourself made it easier. In fact you always made it a competition, who could complete their round and get back to the palace first. Which, was usually you; before that Town Hall meeting. The Sheriff introduced you out of the blue, but not like an afterthought. And he smiled, he genuinely smiled and sounded happy. A whisper ran through the crowd that was excited – a change from the disgruntled kind you’d heard many a time before. Some of them likely had already seen you in the mines, and as you picked out Will and Marian you couldn’t help your beaming smile. The only people who didn’t seem happy with this marriage announcement were the Lords. You were already cautious of them from your previous meetings, when he’d let you sit in on them (now you had a real job you had less time to do such things); but now you simply dared them to come between the two of you. Although you had to admit in your head the thought of running your sword, or shooting an arrow, through some of them didn’t seem like such a bad idea. Because of the Town Hall many people liked stopping you and your horse to talk to you. At first it was sweet; the way they would welcome you to the city and shower you with compliments. But then it became ‘Can you just ask the Sheriff’, ‘Could you just tell the Sheriff’ ‘This is urgent!’ and you realised that you had to remember all of these things on top of your general running around. Not always easy. Today you came back with ribbons & flowers in your hair, and Marcus and Askel had been in hysterics (on top of having waited for you for over an hour). This was the work of little girls downtown, and you weren’t about to stop them – Eyhamel hadn’t escaped either, for his troubles, and they ran through his mane and tail. “Just because they aren’t giving you flowers for protecting the city.” “Do they know that’s what you’re doing?” Marcus grinned, “I think they just use you as a messenger.” “Well, I don’t mind that either-!” “You think he listens to what you tell him?” You shrugged, dismounting and kissing Eyha’s muzzle for his patience, “Sometimes we have meaningful discussions. Sometimes he shuts it down. Wil runs things, I’m just glad to make him aware of them…” You began to lead your horse to the stables. Visiting Vesper mattered just as much as anything else; he was out more than he used to be, but still looked like a horse ready to run. “You’re too good for Nottingham, Y/N!” “Oh, hush!” You giggled at Marcus’ comment, but didn’t miss your brother’s look of significance – as if he needed any other reasons to give you one. Today you caught your husband coming back from your room to his office and he paused in the hallway to observe you for a minute; “What did who do to your hair?” “Oh! Little girls from town!” He laughed, “Ah… I like it… it… it looks good.” “It’s pretty.” You beamed, before questioning him. “Where are you going?” “Writing. Uhm, actually I was thinking, if you needed someone else for your rounds.” Wil beckoned you to follow him and you fell in line, “If you want to take Alder with you…” “OH! But-! Darling, he’s… he’s your personal guard.” “I know, but I wanted to help out your cause. It’s no secret you’re helping mine.” He paused again unable to keep his eyes off you, “They like you. I’m glad the people like you. It’s not something I should ignore…” “You don’t.” “I don’t. It’s about taking it elsewhere.” He held his hand out for yours, “Come with me, I need to show you something.”  You kept step with him until you reached his ready room, Alder was the only guard on duty, and gave you a warm smile – which you returned. Hastily turning to your husband as soon as you were inside and the door was closed; “Did you perhaps promise him a position?” “You’re too good at reading people.” “I aught to be, I believe I’ll be needing it.” Your look was significant and the Sheriff feigned as if he didn’t know what you meant with a hum to match, “If you wish not to give him one.” “I can figure something out, but he’s a man I actually trust around you. Which I may also be able to tell you now.” He laughed, beckoning you to his desk, “You don’t trust people around me?” “Not the people with whom you must unfortunately be acquainted. Though why you would expect me to after what you have told me…” “Thought there might be a reason you were no longer accompanying me to Church.” “I’m still angry.” You would go back eventually, the thought of him suffering alone was already pulling you that direction. He sighed through his next sentence, “And she has a temper.” Then lifted the parchment from the table and held it out for you, “Tell me what you think.” Your look was at least amused as you snatched it from him ‘I’ll show YOU temper!’ and read; surprised to find that the letter was from Carina (who signed as Cara) and her husband Charles. “Your friends address you as Sheriff too?” You were also surprised to find it was not addressed to ‘William’. “It’s an official letter so, yes.” You wondered if he would stick with the idea of you writing to him as ‘Wil’ and read on; ‘… We are pleased to hear of your recent marriage to Y/N, Princess of Stavanger. Having briefly made her acquaintance in Nottingham.’ You cringed internally, remembering her from the last big argument you and he had, ‘We cordially invite you to Shirebrook township. We would be honoured to welcome you, as Sheriff, and the new Lady of Nottingham. The people will wish to see her, especially, and we would be overjoyed to be her first official visit. We are not otherwise engaged presently, so reply with a time most convenient for you and we will begin preparations…’ You raised your eyes to the Sheriff’s face slowly; “Lady of Nottingham--?” He nodded, “You have an official title now. But,” he gestured, “that’s hardly the point of the letter.” “It’s addressed to you, it’s your decision.” Wil scoffed, “I won’t do anything without you, especially when you’re involved. You should know that.” You bit your lips together, “…I would love to go.” “I told you they loved you.” You tilted your head, “They don’t have a choice.” “Of course they have a choice. It’s much more testament to you than I.” There was a distinct message there, not lost on you; they don’t like me, they have to like me, but you… they LOVE you. “So you will accompany me?” “I will…” You nodded, suddenly remembering a good idea of your own; “OH! Wil! I- May we ride? Just us, no entourage… no carriages… Alder and Marcus if we really must. But, just you and I.” The Sheriff immediately smiled – and you knew he knew before he even spoke; “You’ve been planning this for quite some time, Y/N, haven’t you?” “I’ve wanted to see what is beyond Nottingham, yes. Especially as you have such jurisdiction… I suppose I am far more used to… open land. The advancement of your city is a new game. One I very much enjoy but-” “You wish to be out there?” “I do. But only if that adventure gets to happen beside you.” He chuckled, “Okay. We’ll do it your way.” He took the letter delicately from you, before proceeding to take your hand in his, “Besides, I suppose the head of my Nottingham guard will be apt at defending her Sheriff.” You grinned; “He best believe it.” *** As an official ‘Lady’ now, you were also sent a group of handmaidens. Which at first you weren’t even so sure you wanted, for one thing if it wasn’t so obvious that you were better in the company of men… then again on that thought, you supposed that may be the point. It was just strange for you to be around so many British women at once; you were certainly out of your element. You had to admit it was nice to be waited on, that they would spend hours on your hair and dressing you in clothes that seemed a little too fine to just wander to Church in. (Although that was always an afterthought when you saw how much Wil beamed to see you in some of these dresses.) It was enjoyable to sit with them and gossip – your old room became an airier space to relax in – and it made you miss your sisters, suddenly you were glad of the substitute. Even though you complained; “I don’t need them-!” “Yes, I know you don’t need them, but to play the part you now must, you should have some. There are some things that can be overlooked, but a role must also be played here.” You wondered how much of a role he was really playing himself, what Wil would be like away from here, if he didn’t have to look after Nottingham… if he didn’t have his fancy title… The Sheriff paused, “Besides, you now have female friends.” You shot him a look at the suggestion you didn’t have female friends and he chuckled, “You understand perfectly what I mean.” “I do. I’m just glad your inference is not that I only have female friends.” “I know you better than that.” “I should hope you would.” You nudged him gently with a smile, “Speaking of, I must be off! Nottingham shall not defend itself-!” You took Wil’s hands in yours as you skipped in front of him, leaning up to steal a kiss. then let him go to run to your next patrol. His laughter followed you up the corridor. “Hurry back.” You swivelled back to him with your best smile; “Only for you!” Things weren’t always good. On his best days you almost couldn’t believe that you’d could have lucked into a better - albeit arranged - marriage. On his worst days you wanted to be nowhere near him, at the same moment as wanting to take him in your arms and hold him closer than he’d ever been before. The Sheriff was a man with a dark past and you were glad you knew that, there was a lot that could be attributed to his behaviour from that. And as he came and went between meetings you also became knowledgeable as to who made him more antsy, and who made him tense. As you learned all of this you could roughly map out how Wil’s day would go, and how his mood would take shape (depending on how he woke up.) Wil had rough nights, where he would wake panting and shaking in a cold sweat, nearly delusional. Where he’d flinch if you touched him; the only way down from this was to talk to him – gentle and firm, until he sought the comfort of your arms himself. Nights where he was restless and couldn’t sleep; where it was best to slip your arms around him and kiss his shoulders, sometimes your delicate touches and soothing voice would eventually lull him to sleep – sometimes you’d drift off, but he would stay with you; before you’d been a permanent resident the Sheriff would have spent half the night pacing the floor – you had the ability to keep him here.  It wasn’t all bad – you couldn’t even pretend that. He had good nights too, where he’d retire to bed with you early. Or when you could entice him from the draw of his desk to lie with you. Pulling you to his chest and kissing you, slow and lazy and intoxicating. Rough nights didn’t always translate into bad days, and more often than not the Sheriff had softer, quiet mornings where he would lay with you and simply talk. He was an early riser – you weren’t always, but sometimes Wil would stay until he had no choice, and sometimes he would let you make him late: ‘Oh… it’s only Pembroke he can wait.’ Maybe you should have been telling him not to shirk his duties, but he worked incredibly hard the rest of the time and you would be selfish with his time when he let you be. The Sheriff was yours, and you loved him dearly, that much you knew was certain. You were beginning to wonder if perhaps he felt the same – his command of Norse went from strength to strength, he would greet you and leave you with typical sweet talk, but also liked telling you all about his day in words that were your own. When you gently prompted corrections, he would only smile and attempt again. You and Tuck kept in daily contact – well, you needed someone’s professional opinion on what was happening in the Sheriff’s meetings that didn’t come from the man himself. Tuck was the safest, and most neutral, place to gossip and right now only had good news for you. There had been no confessional since you had married; what’s more Tuck said Wil spent a great deal of time talking about you. You were his focus – what’s more his focus was only on you. You weren’t sure how long you could keep it; or if it was ‘yours’ to keep. But for now, you would revel in him – and nothing and no-one was going to take him away from you.

*** Surprisingly everyone allowed you to go on this trip alone together. Considering your occupation, you were supposed to stick to the main trails; which if you were honest you thought was stupid, it would give everyone a clear shot at him, yet you understood the point. He’d be much safer than if it was a narrow path through forests where anyone could hide anywhere. Still you ignored the directive as soon as you were outside the walls. Nottingham city was beautiful, you weren’t about to fault it; but the stir in your heart matched the stir of the horse beneath you as the gates opened onto rugged pathways and grass. You weren’t about to stop Eyhamel from surging forward and urged him on. There were shouts from behind you, but it was the Sheriff’s laugh you were really listening too; and soon you were joined by a gorgeous black Stallion. That caused you to laugh too; the feel of the wind rushing passed, blowing cool air through your hair and stirring your dress – the freedom of being outside was a kick you couldn’t resist. And it had been so long. Wil would have been content to simply watch your free spirit; a proud smile on his face. You looked much more comfortable in your clothing today than what they had been dressing you in for church. They complimented your personality – dress a little courser in fabric, you wore riding trousers. The English would see that as scandal, to you and your fellow Norse women it was standard ‘What, you think we go into battle in pretty dresses?!’ then to the look on his face ‘Don’t answer that.’ Comfortable and easy to move in, and yet still elegant in a steel grey-blue that matched his own attire. Your hair was intricate and pulled back from your face so it didn’t get in your way as you rode; a real Norse Princess. Or, Shield Maiden. Still, despite this he couldn’t let you get too far ahead when you didn’t know the exact route, and under all technicalities you were supposed to be protecting him. He encouraged Vesper and his horse responded in kind, tugging the reigns as he raced after you. Wil was a skilled rider, it had been one of the very last things his parents had taught him, you had a wealth of experience, but he was determined to give you a run for your money – and you’d already witnessed the steady control of their partnership in town. His horse out here was something else to behold, and you wanted to see Vesper run. You turned to him with a smile; “Think you can keep up, Sheriff?” “Keep up?” He returned a smirk, “I believe it is you that aught to be worried about such things.” “Is that so?” Eyhamel was quick, that you knew, but Vesper was larger and you’d never seen him at speed, let alone full tilt. You urged him again; “Let’s see you try to keep up!” “Ah!” He called after you, “You forget who knows the way!” “I studied the map!” You yelled back, unwilling to concede that he had a point. Wil shook his head, but found himself chuckling again; “Let’s give them a run for their money, Vesper!” Eventually you both slowed to walk, to give your horses respite – still, by then you were both laughing together. That laugher changed to friendly chatter, as he explained his jurisdiction, the towns nearest to Nottingham and far on into the North of England – how the trade deal with your home town would work, and then the river-to-sea connection. Which is also how the soldiers made their way to the crusade, but, he was a little less willing to talk about that. You told him a little bit more of the journey here from the North, how you wished that you had come into port in Nottingham instead of London with your quip of ‘Oh, I bet it’s beautiful from the water’ to which he chuckled, ‘Well, your people will surely get to see it in its glory…Perhaps you can go and greet them as they arrive?’ You lit up immediately at that, as he knew you would, and the Sheriff got to enjoy your smile. You arrived on the outskirts of a small town eventually, and Wil reached out for your reigns, pulling you and your horse closer. As Nottingham, there were walls around this town, these wooden instead of stone and brick. Already on your approach you saw people scrabbling around on the top to open up the gate. You could hear the faint calls of “Sheriff! The Sheriff is here!!” and your heart swelled a little, hand slipping to his around your reigns, Wil squeezed your hand tight – thanking the guards for opening up the gate. Slowing your horse in sync with his as the gate lowered behind you, Wil let you hand go with a small nod – already you had noticed many of the towns people standing in their doorway to stare inquisitively. It was not Nottingham by any stretch of the imagination; with most of the houses small wooden structures of only one floor. Save for one a little more stately in the middle; you assumed belonging to the people you were really here to meet. Wil pulled up and dismounted, stable hands surging forward to take care of Vesper – you weren’t one to wait for him to help you down, and slid from your saddle before gently patting Eyha for riding so well, handing over your reigns, rejoining your husband. The Sheriff placed his hand gently to the small of your back and guided you towards the couple awaiting you. You already recognised the woman as Cara, the man beside her must have been her husband, Charles. “Wil-!” He stepped forward, “It feels like it’s been a long time.” That hit you immediately; they called him Wil. Sheriff in official letters, Wil in real life. Friends. “Not nearly as long as you’d think. It’s been a while since you yourself made the trip, no?” “Would that I could attend anything in the fair City of Nottingham. What with the war effort we have much to attend to.” The Sheriff chuckled gently; “Well, let’s not make that a priority topic today…” turning to his wife, “Cara… a delight as ever.” She accepted his kiss to her hand, before he straightened to presented you. “It pleases me no end that I am able to introduce you to my wife, Y/N, Lady of Nottingham. Hailing from the Norse Kingdoms.” He always added it, as if it were the thing he loved the most. That you were unusual, an unknown, untameable force of nature. Cara immediately took your hands in hers, “Oh! Y/N! It’s so, SO good to finally make your acquaintance!” You tried not to think about the last time you’d seen her, and were equally glad that at the time you were not speaking English. You took a breath and smiled, squeezing her hands gently, “And yours. It’s a pleasure to make this my first official…” you searched for the word, “…outing?” The Sheriff brushed a hand to your back encouragingly, “It’s taken us quite a while longer than I should have liked. But, we’re here now.” Charles stepped forward and took your hand much as Wil had Cara’s. “It’s an honour to have you in Shirebrook…” You could already see the way that Cara was studying the sword and bow strapped to Eyhamel, and you couldn’t help but smile at her line of sight. “Wow…” she gasped, “when Wil said Shield Maiden he really meant it.” You nodded, “I’ve seen my fair share of territorial battles.” Then with a shrug, “It’s as much my role now to protect him as to be…” you turned to your husband, “a devoted wife.” And you would be. If he was; you still weren’t counting any slips. “It must be incredible to learn such things.” “I could teach you.” You didn’t even consider the fact that wasn’t something done in England. For a second it slipped your mind that you weren’t in a country that respected the freedoms of its women, and Cara immediately flushed. “Oh, I don’t know if I… I don’t know if-” Charles’ response surprised you, and he nudged her, “Cara, dearest, this is not an opportunity you will often have, hmm?” The Sheriff folded his arms with a chuckle, “Whilst you’re at it, you can exchange for an English woman’s etiquette.” You scoffed and shoved his arm with a laugh of your own, though had probably just proven his point. “Remember you’re talking to a Princess!” Still you winked, “She could teach me better than you!” Your first foray into Shirebrook township therefore didn’t go as expected. Perhaps you thought you’d sit around and chat, maybe talk about the town and have dinner together, yet it was very much a split room. The men discussing town planning, and you: teaching Cara how exactly to balance a sword right and how to pull bow strings to just the right amount of tension, the right posture… Then her giving you a surprisingly sarcastic rundown on how women were ‘supposed’ to behave, but also gentle advice, which you knew you would be indebted to. Advice you would gain nowhere else; how to be sassy and snarky whilst still seeming to be polite and in your place. How to speak through your husband; or else, convince him that your idea was his idea. Cara expressed that you wouldn’t know it, but she essentially managed to run Shirebrook like that – although this didn’t surprise you, she was the one who rode all the way to Nottingham after all. And after your initial impression of her perhaps being just another of the Sheriff’s women, you were also gaining a practical example of ‘never judge a book by its cover’. The Sheriff watched all this from his chair, at first it was subtle, because he did have many important things to discuss with Charles. What with fighting and funding the war; but a number of great changes going on in the town itself. A few of which would need the Sheriff’s permission to take place. Once the serious conversation was over, however, both men were able to sit and admire their wives. Of course William had heard Charles wax lyrical about Cara many times before, yet he had never had the opportunity to do so with you. True, he’d written a lot about you – and upon introducing the idea of you to people, he’d always given a lot of information but, that was really all it ever was. He’d never really talked about his feelings for you. “You know…” The Sheriff sat back, comfortably, running his fingers over his lips; “When the King suggested an arranged marriage, I must admit to my worry… Now I can only think how, not only did I have no right to be worried about her but, that in all honesty, it is nothing but an honour to be in a union with such a woman…” He swallowed hard, and soon the Sheriff was discovering that, having started, he couldn’t stop. “She is perhaps a little fiery, but she’s already more devoted to me than I deserve. If I were her, I perhaps would have left. But she’s here. And it’s not… like anything I’ve had before. She cares – about me, as a person and how I feel. And how people treat me.” William tipped his head, watching the way you laughed gently, thoroughly enjoying yourself in Cara’s company. The realisation came too quick; and clearly not soon enough. This marriage was not just a contractual fulfillment, because he had to. Although he had treated it as such. The Sheriff cared about you; he cared a LOT about you. He may have been the cause of a lot of your hurt, but he didn’t want you upset. He didn’t want others to hurt you either – and he would try to stop that to the best of his ability. Wil had let you take over his guard because he wanted to ulitize your strengths; but was that just the reason, or because he also wanted to see you happy? Of course he wanted to see you happy here. And so he kept talking, perhaps even a little perplexed by what he was saying. Yet realising there wasn’t a word of it untrue. He wasn’t sure he knew you enough to love you yet; to really love you. But he felt something for you – a lot stronger than he thought he’d ever felt for anyone. Charles watched all this with a smile that turned into a smirk; “Hey, what happened to you? You’re not that silver fox that everyone spent too long trying to tame now, huh, Wil?” There was a long pause, and his blue eyes still didn’t leave you – the Sheriff blinked a few times before speaking; “Not anymore.”

***

There was something in the way that he treated you after you got back from Shirebrook that was a little different. You weren’t sure why, but the Sheriff smiled more around you, he let you into meetings that you hadn’t been allowed in before – and if anyone said anything, he was pretty firm about you staying. By the tone of voice he used, no one was arguing with him either. And you soon gained your own kind of political astuteness. Even if you spent most of it listening, not talking. At this particular meeting things seemed tense. Your eyes had flicked from side to side within the room for what felt like hours and no one was budging on their view. Wil seemed annoyingly on the fence, and every time he actually tried to come up with a reasonable solution another point was argued. To which he would look irritated and give you the same exasperated glance. You didn’t think it was possible to come to his rescue without either being ordered out of the room… or laughed out of it. Point being, nothing was getting anywhere. Eventually the door at the far end of the room opened and a servant wheeled in a cart filled with what appeared to be bottles of alcohol. It was about the first thing that had really caught your attention, standing with your back against a pillar. The Lords at first paid him no mind as he walked to the table in the corner, upon which stood a collection of alcohol bottles neatly lined up with ornate glasses for everyone present at the meets to help themselves to. You stood straight and tried to guess the content – all the bottles he had seemed to be of the same or similar type, so you assumed the liquid inside them was one sort of alcohol. But it was only as he began stacking them and refilling things that the conversational lull seemed to fade, and they paid attention. “OH! I say, what have you brought us today?” “We have been gifted a large set of brandy bottles from the Archdeacon, M’Lord.” Tension immediately ran through your body and if you were standing straight before, it was nothing compared to the way you were heightened now. Arms no longer folded – although you weren’t exactly sure what kind of action you were ready to take. Yet the message was clear – the Church had sent him brandy… You dared let your eyes flick to Wil; not exactly tense, but the look on his face begged that to be where the conversation was left. It wasn’t. “Oh! Brandy? I dare say we should have some!” The Lords were all in agreement with Pembroke’s statement and the Sheriff’s eyes slowly traced to yours. You shook your head subtly ‘Don’t do this to yourself, you don’t have to do this to yourself.’ There was panic there, it was restrained, but it was and you saw it. Too good at reading someone who had so many walls. ‘I’m here… I’m HERE now.’ Pembroke turned to him; “Will you partake Sheriff?” You hated that it took a minute to recollect himself, “No.” but glad of the word, as he shook his head, “No.” “Oh, but you must!” One of the other Lords piped up, “It’s exquisite.” You shot him a look, maybe he’d like to take a look at your husband’s back and then try to reargue that point. But then it hadn’t occurred to you that the fathers of these men would have been the guardians of the House – did they know? Was everyone in this room aware of what he’d been through? That made the goading into a glass of alcohol even more horrific; they were taunting him with his past and knew it. “No. No. I’m quite alright.” Of course they poured him one anyway, “Oh, but we insist.” “No – I’d rather not!” “Sheriff-!” “No-” This was strange to see; he wasn’t someone that would put up with this. You’d seen him yell at them enough before (sometimes you got a kick out of it, but you weren’t about to tell him that.), but it was the significance of the situation that had turned Wil from snappy and confident, to someone clearly conflicted by what he was faced with. It was starting to affect him; especially with the forced nature of the scenario – like the polite declines were a habit coded into him. By the very same people that had made him hate the taste so much, you could bet. You were already a few paces forward and reading the room like a book, if anyone took another step towards him, if they were about to force him to drink it, if Wil thought he really had to drink it… You were pissed. That they wouldn’t take ‘No’ as a valid answer, that they wouldn’t just leave him alone. It clicked, a little late perhaps, but also just in time – that’s why you were there. Protect the city. Protect the Sheriff. Hell, PROTECT YOUR HUSBAND!! You stepped between them, snatching the bottle with purpose and Pembroke paused like he wasn’t sure what to do with you. There was a hushed whisper over the other Lords and you couldn’t give a damn. You took one look at it with disgust, before weighing it up correctly in your hand and not giving it a second thought, smashing the bottle against the wall. Everyone but the Sheriff jumped at the sound, splinters of glass scattered over the floor; you were sure there were a few in your hands to accompany the tacky sweetness of the alcohol. You didn’t care. The way you were staring at Pembroke didn’t stay exclusive for long and your disapproving scowl shifted to the other Lords, now cowering in the corner. Yeah, you didn’t think they’d like even an ounce of defiance. You were cold, and fierce.  They weren’t standing up to anything but a Norse warrior in that moment. He’d proven to you his faithfulness, his loyalty. Wil had opened up to you about his past and it was more than clear that his history was keeping him manipulated. This might have been the first time you’d seen it first hand, perhaps the first time you’d noticed – but you weren’t about to stand for it, and everyone was going to know this in no uncertain terms. Wil shifted behind you; you weren’t looking at him but you could already bet he was calmer – he was breathing again. Safe. Exactly how you intended to keep him. You made sure that your statement didn’t go unheard and this time it was your voice shaking in anger, no matter how controlled you tried to keep it. That force of nature that the Sheriff always insisted you were; “He said. NO.”

*** When you couldn’t go riding outside alone – as sometimes he let you do, but William worried and wouldn’t let you go too far – to see her, you would write to Cara, and you found yourself loving her more and more. You were glad that he was right, and you were becoming fast friends. It was nice to have someone to vent to sometimes who had a different perspective, or when you wanted to gush poetically about the man you’d married. To read back the same things from her made you smile, sometimes made you glad that you weren’t the only woman here who felt that way. Cara was free to speak her mind to you because of her social class, a fact for which you were eternally grateful. But there was one subject for which she could not speak, and you had much curiosity… Today you surrounded yourself with your handmaidens. It was a hot day, so instead of sitting in your room eager to soak up the sun’s rays for yourself, you all moved outside into the courtyard. As everyone had noticed that your relationship with your husband was progressing nicely, talk had begun to turn – predictably - to the tentative beginnings of children. It was a conversation you were willing to entertain, but not seriously. For one, this wasn’t a conversation that the two of you had had yet. And besides what had already transpired between the two of you, there wasn’t a lot of sexual activity going on. He was still being respectful of your space, and your need to get used to the idea of ‘ours’, not ‘his’ and ‘yours.’ But you knew it wouldn’t stay that way; and you didn’t want it to stay that way. From there… well, unless Wil was adamant he didn’t want any, which, you could understand considering what he’d been through… Children would be a natural progression; at least to talk about. Still, none of these facts stopped you from giggling with Ada and Carolyn about the prospect of having children, and other general gripes they had about men in general. After a particular loud fit of giggles, you found yourselves joined by Tuck, who’s little smile read intrigued; “What on Earth are you ladies talking about!?” “Oh, Tuck!” Ada sighed, stifling her laugher, “The prospect of having children!” He turned curiously to you, “Yes?” You shrugged; “Eventually I suppose. You would know better than I.” “Unfortunately that part of the Sheriff’s life remains a mystery to me.” But he winked gently, “I’ll see what I can figure out, don’t you worry!” “Well, thank you.” Although you mused on it for a second, “Although I suppose the whole idea is fairly presumptuous…” You trailed; it wasn’t something you had considered before this moment, but what if one or both of you were unable to actually have children? Tuck swayed from side to side as he mused that, “Well, there’s always the option of Foundling House.” “OH!” Ada nodded along, “That would be a secondary option – good idea Tuck!” You were glad they were all conversing and the focus was off you for a second, because the name itself shocked you back to a conversation you’d never forget. “Wait, wait, what!?” “You know, a Foundling House, like an orphanage?” Carolyn’s head tipped at the look on your face – which you could imagine was fighting very hard not to look horrified, “Do you, not have those?” Tuck shook his head; “No, Y/N, for accuracy it’s… more like... for abandoned, found children. Hence... foundling.” Suddenly that conversation was a hundred times worse than you had ever realised, and your hands flew to frame your face. “Y/N? Are you okay?” “No- No… I…” You sprang up, eyes flown wide, “Excuse me!” You were flying though the palace before you really knew where you were going, and even though everything was connecting in your head, there were pieces you couldn’t place. Wil had mentioned his father to you before, he said ‘that was after my father was gone’ and he’d also mentioned his family’s estate. But now Tuck was telling you he was abandoned? Perhaps? Abandoned and then left to the Churches mercy!?!? and now here. Not broken, not in a way that made him weak – but bendable, to their whims. What the Sheriff had been through was horrific. What you’d just been told made it so much worse. It wasn’t like, if his parents died, he was orphaned through no fault of his own. You’d just been told he was unwanted. No more. He turned in surprise to your hurried approach and placed the papers back on his desk not quite so ready to accept your embrace as you were to give it. Causing the Sheriff to stagger back a few paces. “Y/N…? Are you- Are you okay? Sweetheart?” You didn’t answer, burying your face in his jacket; you weren’t sure you could answer him, at least not appropriately. I want you… I will take care of you now… Wil sighed, winding his arms around you as your hold on him tightened. As if letting him go had never been an option. Running a hand through your hair he cleared his throat; “I don’t know what I did to deserve your affections, but, I love you too.” You immediately pulled back, staring up into his eyes, unable to hide your shock; “You… you…?!” You weren’t sure if it was deliberate and he’d meant to say it, or it’d simply slipped out as an afterthought, but you couldn’t help but laugh happily and take his face in your hands before kissing him. The tears were happy too; no matter what had been said downstairs. You stayed like that for a while, doing nothing more than looking into each other’s eyes. With Wil’s arms around you like this you were content to remain here forever; and by the smile on his face every word out of his mouth was sincere. It was about time you said the same – but he had used the word ‘too’. He knew you loved him; the Sheriff didn’t need to hear you say it out loud. He never had.

I can hear everything you don’t say…

---

Thank you for reading this! You guys are real ones! Thank you for bearing with me on updating this! 😅😅😅 I hope this point was worth the wait!

[fineosaur]

tropes tag

i was tagged by @wynafryd-manderly, thank you lovely 💖

slow burn or love at first sight // fake dating or secret dating // enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers (which i think is obvious cause literally all my otps are best friends to lovers) // there’s only one bed (i honestly dont die for either of these but one bed is a lot sexier than long distance trust me) or long distance correspondence // hurt/comfort (THATS MY SHIT. THATS DELICIOUS.) or amnesia // fantasy au or modern au (im rly a sucker for moderns and if you look at my ao3 page it shows.)// mutual pining (mutual pining has potential for angst so you know where i’m at bby) or domestic bliss // smut (HAVE U SEEN ME? fluff is just the sprinkles you get alongside a dump load of smut in my fics) or fluff // canon compliant or fix it (i cant choose 🥺 i love them both) // reincarnation or character death (unless its jon in winds, idgaf about reincarnation tbh)// one shot or multi chapter (im gonna go with both because whilst im unable to read anything longer than 6k at a time recently, i really really love multis. writing them. reading them. spending the whole night absorbing a 200k fic was the shit when i had the attention span for it)// kid fic or road trip fic (i 🤢 kidfics. yes ive written one but that was a gift. its just not my shit. i do not engage.) // arranged marriage or accidental marriage (hehe im writing an arranged au. only cause i cant help myself. accidental sounds fun as shit i might give it a go too.)// high school romances or middle aged romances (neither? like i dont read either. i have fully removed myself from the fact that i ever went to high school and i believe i’ll never age so i just dont give into middle aged romances either) // time travel or isolated together // neighbors or roommates (neighbours somehow has a sexier appeal to me.)  // sci-fi au or magic au  // angst or crack (i believe every fic i’ve written has angst in it and yknow what idgaf thats the best shit. i will only get excited by reading angst as well) // apocalyptic or mundane

most people have been tagged in this but im gonna retag like a loser so im sorry if ive missed that you’ve done this

@yanak324, @evax3, @watersandwolves, @northernfieldsforever, @treaddelicately, @aryasbadbenergy, @livhatesolives, @nalgenewhore, @go-catch-a-chickn, @sneetchstar

[gay-dragon]

David’s character development as seen through his clothes

In light of the quarantine and suddenly having loads of free time when I usually have none, I figured I'd take this opportunity to revive an old post that I think got swallowed by the internet (probably because I tried to get fancy with gifs, so I'm just gonna do screenshots this time)

Basically, I'm a fashion hoe and I adore David Schreibner so this is an analysis of how the clothes he wears in season 3&4 reflect his journey as a character - let’s go!

Essentially, one thing I love about David is that he's a very multi-layered character, but he remained super consistent throughout his development. That's really hard to do, and DRUCK did it beautifully. To summarise it very crudely, I'd say that there are three main levels to David that we discover in season 3:

- Layer 1 is the mysterious cool guy that Matteo is instantly struck by

- Layer 2 is a fun, goofy and playful side of him which Matteo discovers quite quickly when they start getting to know each other

- Layer 3 is the very vulnerable, scared side of David which Matteo sees hints of a couple of times earlier in the season, but it’s so heavily veiled by the other two layers that I would argue he doesn’t really see this side of David until at least episode 7, and only truly sees the proper extent of it when they reunite at the pool and David finally talks about his feelings.

I also think there’s another layer which is the competitive, sassy side of him, but I have yet to figure out where to place this one, so I’ll leave it aside for now (I think it could play a big role in his potential season, though: when you’re competitive but struggling to achieve your dreams, it can be really painful. But I digress)

None of the three layers cancel each other out of course, David is still a cool person and a goofy person even when we’ve seen his more vulnerable side. But by the end of the season we’re finally able to see how these three aspects of him work together and influence each other to inform his behaviour.

This brings me to his fashion. I absolutely adore what they’ve done with it, and how consistent it has been throughout this development. I just want to point out a couple of examples of his outfits that perfectly demonstrate his consistent and believable development.

Of course throughout the majority of season 3, we see David sporting plain, baggy, dark coloured outfits in order to, we assume, be noticed as little as possible. What I’d like to look at is the clothes we see him wear that depart from this.

There’s of course this iconic shirt, which we see him wear very early on in the season. It hints at his goofier side, which Matteo has already gotten to know. I love that they had him wear it in the almost kiss scene, because although Matteo was very smitten by David’s cool guy side, I don’t think he would have fallen for him so completely if he hadn’t gotten to know goofy David. DRUCK makes a point of showing us the two of them clowning around a lot, so it’s clear that this playful attitude is something of a requirement for both of them, in a relationship. This shirt is also slightly more revealing than a lot of the clothes we’ve seen David wear so far, so that's a reminder of the hint of vulnerability that David has let Matteo glimpse. Basically I love this dinosaur shirt because it encapsulates hints of all three of these layers of David, making the almost kiss even more believable as we are reminded of exactly why Matteo is falling for this guy.

Similarly, the shirt David is wearing here is more revealing than what we’ve seen him wear before, once again reminding us of the reasons why Matteo is so smitten. However there is none of the playfulness of the dinosaur shirt, it’s just dark colours, slightly paralleling the way Matteo feels about this situation: a little vulnerable, and definitely not playful (it’s so clear how uncomfortable he is)

Fast forwarding a little to this scene, aside from being an absolutely iconic look, I was so excited about this wardrobe choice because it completely communicates what is happening in this scene: David is beginning to let other people in. He’s meeting his boyfriend’s friends properly for (I assume) the first time, and later in the scene he gives Abdi advice in a way that implies personal experience (so hints of vulnerability). What’s great about the shirt is that along with this slight opening up to the world, we finally see David starting to wear clothes with a little more pattern and structure, but it remains consistent to his character by having a dark colour scheme. The shirt is also still quite baggy, reminding us that David hasn’t quite let these other people see his more vulnerable side.

This one is quite simple and goes without saying: Matteo and David wearing each other’s clothes, the morning after they’ve finally let themselves be completely open and vulnerable with each other. It’s such a gorgeous visual way of saying: we understand each other, we are here for each other, we love each other.

This one is the look that made me most emotional. The sunglasses are fun and goofy but also cool, and they hide part of his face so again a reminder of his vulnerable side. And paired with the jumper which denotes a sense of belonging to a group, we get this: David still has some way to go in terms of letting people in, but he feels like he belongs, and he’s beginning to open up. I love it so much.

Going into season 4, we see David wear a shirt that serves a very similar purpose to the dinosaur shirt, except this time it has the added layer of being a shirt that belongs to Matteo. Here we are once again reminded of all these layers of David, all these reasons Matteo fell for him, but it also goes the other way around. Indeed, this clip is technically David’s perspective, so we see that he loves Matteo for all of these reasons too, and they go so well together because they understand each other on all of these different levels.

Then for the rest of season 4:

Throughout season 4 we get to see David wearing much lighter colours, or wearing outfits like in the scene where he meets the boys that fit the darker colour scheme that he has always adhered to but have more structure (and occasionally more pattern). This is what I was saying earlier about him having let his friends in to an extent, but still having some way to go before he lets himself be truly open.

 On that note, in season 4 I know some people found him out of character, but I don’t really agree: I think those three layers are still at play. The only difference is that we’re no longer seeing him through Matteo’s eyes, and he hasn’t let many people in all the way to layer 3, so of course we’re not going to see him in the complexity that we saw him by the end of Matteo’s season.

Indeed, by this point David seems to have relaxed a little, I’d say he’s let Matteo’s friends in to layer 2, so he is now both cool David and goofy David. But as far as we know he has not yet let them see him truly be vulnerable. This means that he’s still at a level with them that he was with Matteo quite early on in season 3, so there is clearly still a long way to go before he really opens up. 

Therefore I hope that if/when he gets a season, we’ll get to see him working towards finally being totally open with the world (not that he needs to tell the world all of his intimate secrets, but just being his entire self). I’m sure Matteo isn’t the only person that he’s let in to layer 3 (Laura most definitely was before him), but I think it’s important to be able to be vulnerable and honest about not being okay with more than just one or two people - maybe we’ll see him start letting in some of his own friends, new or old.

 But there you have it, guys. There’s always so much to see, and tbh this only really scratches the surface of what there is to read, but in essence this is why I love what they did with David’s wardrobe choices throughout the two seasons that we have known him. It’s such a perfect example of what DRUCK does so well, which is developing characters in every aspects of the show. I’m really excited to see where they’re going to take David next, and how it will be reflected in what he wears!

[oofluc]

⌠ AXEL AURIANT, 20, CISMALE, HE/HIM ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, LUC MONTAGNIER! according to their records, they’re a FIRST year, specializing in AWARENESS TRAINING, BREATH CONTROL, HAND TO HAND COMBAT + KNIFE FIGHTING SKILLS, SWORD TRAINING, PRECISION SHOOTING, FIREARMS & SWAT TRAINING; and they DID go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of ( dried blood on busted knuckles, forced smiles and sweat drenched after training ). when it’s the (virgo)’s birthday on 09/17/1999, they always request their SEARED SCALLOPS from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. ⌿ ooc mochi, 23, she/her, gmt ⍀  

slight warning to those who saw i originally planned him to be an anxious soft boi … i was wrong also there is a suicide mention & some subtle child abuse maybe... plus it’s kind of long ? and an incoherent mess but whatever !! plotting is welcome either on tumblr or on discord which you can find me at mochi#7066 !! his pinterest is here yes i went overboard with sections esp bc im gonna add more hdjf !! stats here and a full connection page here with most stuff i have so far ! @gallagherintro​

PARALLELS

fred jones | scooby doo

stefan salvatore | the vampire diaries

hatsuharu sohma | fruits basket

noatak | avatar: the legend of korra

FAMILY

phillipe montagnier | 54

ameline montagnier | 46

marc montagnier | ✝

luc montagnier | 20

charles montagnier | 18

elias montagnier | 18

HISTORY

the montagnier family was originally located in the south of france until luc’s grandfather moved them to quebec. their empire was in manufacturing all kinds of weaponry and selling them to governments and other spy families and organisations. if you needed something a bit obscure or unique, this was the family you'd come to.

luc grew up in a fairly isolated countryside area in a family of four brothers who he loved for the first few years of his life. first was marc, shy and respectful, luc himself two years behind, and then another two years graced the family with twins; charles and elias who lived by their own rules. marc and luc had always been close, marc was the best big brother possible and luc loved him a lot.

eventually after being pitted and forced to compete against each other for so long, it got quite personal and their bonds started being tested. their mother turned a blind eye to their father's borderline abusive methods when luc overtook his older brother in their father’s tests and training. bruises and broken bones were only natural in training so there wasn't much she could say even if she wanted to.

from as long as he could remember, he'd been firing guns. there was a shooting range on their estate and they went on hunting trips, too. his dad often had him show customers the potential of their weaponry and so he'd always been thrusted into that life whether he wanted a say or not. it’s been clear since he was around fourteen that if anyone was taking over the family business it'd be him, not his older brother, marc.

this definitely caused somewhat of a rift between him and marc, as he'd end up getting much harsher punishments when luc would disarm or ground him.

luckily for luc, he did enjoy fighting and was exceptionally gifted in the life planned out for him. he was always the most determined to gain their father's approval, which definitely showed in their results and how obedient he was in front of the man. when he finally got what he wanted, he didn't quite expect it to mean what it did. it was rare but every now and then he would kill for his dad. whether it was someone who betrayed the family or a potential threat to their business, if his dad told him to, he would, no questions asked. it was during this time he was more excluded from training with his brothers since he would be with his dad instead.

SUICIDE TW !!!!!!

his oldest brother marc was sent to blackthorne once he was eighteen and ended up committing suicide at the end of his second year, with luc set to follow the next year. this news was shocking for the montagnier family as luc's father was bitterly embarrassed and disappointed by his firstborns' death, wanting to cover it up as a murder so it couldn't be tied to the family name with such dishonour. it quickly created a divide as charles and elias defended marc's actions and revealed he'd been struggling with depression for the majority of his life, much like they did, which was all unknown to luc, who, for the first time, felt the repercussions of his father's favouritism. he had a new found rebellion against him that was violent with them going at each other's throats for the foreseeable future. luc ended up avoiding his place at blackthorne in hopes to piss off his dad and becoming more reclusive and bitter as time went on.

he really took his brother's death personally, believing he was a factor in it and wishing he'd been there for him more closely. if anyone so much as mentions marc to him he will be on guard and very easily angered. i think before marc died he was very charismatic, egotistical at times and driven whereas now he’s lost a lot of his energy and is more negative & aloof.

the following year was Rough™. he was no longer his dad's golden boy and the family dynamic shifted a lot with marc's death as luc ended up protecting his younger twin brothers instead of beating them for their dad's favour. he's certain he'd have been disowned had his mother not aligned herself with the kids as well.

i think their family dynamic is kinda like the cha family from sky castle if anyone has seen it !

luc eventually decided to enrol in school late, only to end up at gallagher instead. which... i mean, i think before marc died he was excited about attending blackthorne. so he’s bit ??? uncertain about the girls school.

PERSONALITY

genuinely i think it comes down to so many factors, whether he’s in a good mood, who’s speaking to him etc but neutrally he’s quite charming, happy to mess about a bit but more or less takes most stuff too seriously. since he’s not around his dad i do think he will explore a lot more and seek out adventure and fun but if he’s got a test or something due the next day then he’ll bail early since he is defo the type to never let his grades or performance be ruined

he’s quite cocky + likes to win no matter what so yes he will ruin a friendship to beat u at monopoly. second place is last place in his head.

at his best he can be confident, alluring, courteous, loyal… at his worst he's aggressive, destructive, apathetic and always says shit he doesn't mean !!!! will he apologize ?? unlikely but he'll try n make it right once he’s calmed down

thinks the best way to deal with things is with his fists, he’s so EASY to snap and start a fight n he’ll.... maybe apologise for it

i think he defo likes to pretend he’s got no problems and so reverts to a social, supportive friend every once in a while. the type to be brutally honest !!

he’s a definite know it all, thinks he’s the dog’s bollocks, gods gift etc !!!!! doesn’t believe in god but still. I kinda see him a bit jocky idk why but more brooding n isolating 70% of the time bc he’s easily pissed off but when he’s having fUNNNNN he’s ok like a solid guy at times just easily angered

very flirty, he's a major ladies man despite actually being GAY. which is a secret. sh. only two people know he’s gay and that’s his current beard girlfriend ellie cavanagh and childhood friend regine ren. more ppl can defo find out in time and i’m sure ppl have speculations ? maybe have seen him hooking up with guys or something when he thought no one was looking etc probs think he’s bi who knows!!! but for now those two are the only people he’s actually spoken to about it!!!! so if anyone else tries he will deny it as he’s very against the idea of coming out so will not discuss it ty pls.

and it’s not that he doesn’t enjoy sleeping with girls, he’ll be having a great time regardless but he just aint abt to love them like that pls understand

still, he is in a current relationship with ellie who is acting as his beard for him. they have ‘ dated ’ before and are off and on a lot, so they probably seem pretty toxic tbh since ellie n him can clash n argue and he defo still hooks up with other girls despite being in a relationship so feel free to kill him for cheating !

wanted connections !!!

going off the last point, maybe some of ellie’s friends who come at him for how he seemingly treats her !!!

i'd love for blackthorne ppl to have known his brother, he'd have been around about 22/23 and a fourth year now if he was still alive so ?? it might help luc with some closure if he could talk about him since it happened at blackthorne

ppl to know the family, some family friends would be amazing !!! i feel regardless of alliances etc their family would have stayed as neutral as possible since they're selling weapons so they want all the customers.

so people that know HIM while he was growing up would be interesting esp those expecting him to have joined blackthorne when he was supposed to 2 years ago, and obvs him probably changing from who they knew him as to a more negative version now

might put a wc for his twin bros as they potentially joined his arrival at gallagher as first years too but who knows. they’d be 18 so if anyone wants a family friend connection that is around that age, maybe they were closer to the twins than luc ??

he sleeps with a lot of girls to kinda ‘make sure’ no one knows he’s gay as he defo doesn't feel comfortable with being out. the guys that he sleeps with he'll always pin it on being too drunk to remember or he'll threaten them if they told etc ?? he's very on edge about it and would only hook up super secretly sooo if anyone’s down for that with him

and then obvs need a lot of ladies he’d wanna sleep with to keep his image

previous ex gfs ?? from prep schools !!!!!!!

some positive influences would be good

bad influences as well bc tho he is a bit of a party guy, he doesn’t drink loads and he doesn’t do drugs !!!!!!!!!!!!!! but…. I mean i bet he could be convinced now he’s away from home so

study / sparring buddies !!

i’d love someone to teach him pop culture n normality !! his childhood was training and competing with his bros so he defo doesn’t watch many movies or tv or play games etc so ? someone making him watch all the harry potters ?? binging parks and rec ?? he’d find it so dumb but who wouldnt enjoy it ??