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#literally fighting for my life to post this T-T
hythlodaes · 7 months
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we can run away / but I'll always feel at home with you
thank you @harumeau for sketching emile and estinien <3
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fridayyy-13th · 27 days
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i had so many things to do today, but i only wound up doing two. the two simplest things on the list, in fact. putting tabs on my sheet music and writing dates in my planner. no actual homework. (or more accurately, late work.) now a week of three classes' worth of work all has to be done tomorrow, and i already made plans with my friend for that afternoon. it's 1:32 in the morning. what am i doing anymore.
#friday chats#friday vs post-secondary school#tw vent#one of my assignments not actually due monday (from a t/th class) is to write a poem using a technique in one of several poems showed to us#had to pick a poem and technique in class; i hadn't read the textbook excerpt so i picked a poem and talked right out of my ass#i wonder if i could use extensive personification and allusions to human society to describe the mess that is my brain#something something a city with horrible infrastructure where traffic sucks and it's hard to even get from place to place. or something.#bc Good Fucking God#this time around i've been honest about the fact i'm behind when people ask how i'm doing#i thought maybe if i were open for once instead of fibbing that i was on top of everything i'd be met with assistance#but i've just gotten hollow ''oh you'll be okay! you'll catch right back up''s#(y'all online have been lovely. i'm talking about my family)#for God's sake i want HELP. ADVICE. ANYTHING but platitudes#i don't know how to make myself DO this#literally the fucking meme of the drowning person reaching for help and receiving a high five for their troubles#...i need to go to bed. i'm gonna do that. maybe i'll feel less like a sack of pain and misery in the morning.#in the meantime if y'all have any advice for combating still-trying-to-find-the-right-medication-dosage ADHD pls share it#i'm fighting for my life rn. and losing. badly#(though kind words would be nice too i won't lie. it's just the way my family says them makes it sound like they aren't really listening)#or you could just scroll past this post idk. do what you want. it's your dashboard
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fangirl-dot-com · 9 months
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Chapter 13 - I-T-G-I-R-L, You Know I am That Girl
So this chapter is a little different. As well all know, the reader is an ICON and no one is near her level and she will do some iconic things in 2024
Look out for the dates to see how the time line goes (its a bit all over the place so I apologize but this will end with the start of the F1 Season with her clip in the Formula One Intro for every race and some other little things.)
And I know most of the pictures I used were Max but we play pretend here :D
Like always comments, questions, concerns, reblogs, and likes are always appreciated <3
TAG LIST IS OPEN
February 20, 2024
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acrosstheline.podcast we are so privileged to have sat down with y/n.89 for this all exclusive interview where we discussed her opening races, femininity in male-dominant sports, and what it takes to be a racer - read now in our special edition
liked by y/n.89, landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 751,836 others
lilymhe is this what you've been working on! so so proud of you
y/n.89 hehe it is! and love you too - tell Alex that I'm taking you alex_albon I'm right here y/n.89 and? lilymhe gagged him
y/n_updates OH MY GOSH OUR GIRL'S FIRST MAGAZINE
y/n_lover and hopefully not the last! y/n.89 definitely not y/n_updates SHE RESPONDED?!
change_ur_f-car the questions were top notch! good to see interviewers who aren't looking to poke and prod for a reaction
y/n.nation favorite quote - "I never thought I'd podium on my first race - let alone finish it in the points. I hope that this means that this season will be good. I've always said that I was born to break records - and I'm glad to see that I wasn't lying."
formula1fanatic this was beautifully written, I was skeptical about her joining - but now I have no doubts. she truly belongs in the car to win
May 15, 2024
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duke Y/n L/n has taken the Motor Sport World - and everyone else - by storm. we had the opportunity to sit down with the rookie and discuss the inside feelings that might take over during the pressures of her first year. these are the unfiltered thoughts of y/n l/n.
liked by charles_leclerc, formula1, and 284,937 others
y/n-lover MOMMY, sorry, MOTHER, sorry, MOMMY
maxiel_obsessed glad you put my thoughts into words
y/n'soneandonly can arthur_leclerc fight? post up frenchman
charles_leclerc he's MONEGASQUE
girls4girls this is the moment I became a fan
89_all-the_way "I looked around one time and really thought about how I was the only female racer. I was waiting for the doubts to creep in but instead pride found its way into my soul. I made it and no one can stop me" WHAT AN ICON
box-box literally one of my favorite moments number1y/n-fan I love her so much
maxverstappen1 where is your shirt young lady?
y/n.89 its called fashion - something you haven't heard of mr. I only wear RedBull merchant lewishamilton glad to see you went with my outfit suggestion georgerussell33 what was wrong with my suggestion!? y/n.89 I was not about to wear a Tommy Hilfiger jumpsuit
francisca.gomez loml - so proud of you girly
y/n.89 thanks kika! tell pear I want you back
pitstopfailure BARK BARK BARK BARK
October 7, 2024
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voguemagazine "I think that I was born for this. there's nothing else I'd rather be doing than getting in my car every weekend and putting my life on the line for the sport I love," says Y/n L/n. Her days are directed by high speeds, training, and breaking records.
liked by kellypiquet, lewishamilton, and 820, 184 others
redbullracing that's our rookie!!
emotionalsupport-rivals and everyone liked that bullsrunred they are everything to me your honor
verstappensfam first kelly, then y/n! now max just needs a vogue addition
y/n.89 oh I'm working on it!
y/n-on-top they hit us with that "no one is on her level. they may be close, but we haven't seen talent like this since Lewis Hamilton's rookie year. even then, it feels different - she's different."
iamred-iamyellow and then they follow up with "her poise and composure are unmatched. she wins and maturely celebrates, she doesn't too well in the race - she takes it to heart and fixes it. she is everything a formula 1 driver aspires to be."
y/n.89 BEST BIRTHDAY PRESENT EVER!!!!!!
oscarpias-tree the way her birthday is right in the middle of Max's and Arthur's birthdays y/nxarthur exactly 7 days after max's and 7 days before Arthur's
December 4, 2023
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time Y/n L/n (y/n.89) is TIME's 2024 Woman of the Year.
In her freshman season of Formula 1, L/n talks about her phenomenal rookie year, carving her spot into the sport, and the up's and down's of the expectations that were on her shoulders.
liked by taylorswift, zendaya, and 926,824 others
y/n-lover LETS GO!!!!!!!
maxverstappen1 so so proud
taylorswift congratulations y/n.89! you deserve this and everything!
y/n.nation that's our girl right there - woman of the YEAR
y/n.89 why is everyone tagging me in this post??
landonorris uh, did you even look at it??? oscarpiastri you were announced woman of the year? y/n.89 oh. boxbox_nightmare where'd she go logansargeant oh she's screaming right now - I can hear her though the walls y/n.89 LOGAN
y/n_updates everything about this article changed the way I think about life
lestappenlove this is my Roman Empire
December 20, 2024
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motorsportsproduction The "Minds of Champions" special issue is out now!
We thank sebastianvettel, maxverstappen1, and y/n.89 for sitting down with us for this exclusive. Inside you will find separate as well as joint interviews from the drivers.
liked by arthur_leclerc, danielricciardo, and 2,947,935 others
lastlaplando the way they had not only y/n and max but SEBASTIAN VETTLE TOO
vettelsvetos this is everything to me, I know y/n isn't a champion yet but the way she talks and acts - she's truly champion material
emotionalsupport-rivals max, y/n, and Sebastian are the perfect trio, I could see them win a Le Mans race one day
box_box oh my gosh yes - they'd be the perfect line-up
redbullracing our three generations: past, present, and future
sebastianvettel thank you for having me - it was a special time
y/n.89 it was so good to see you again seb! planning my Switzerland trip as we speak maxverstappen1 am I invited? charles_leclerc Sebastian's favorites ONLY maxverstappen1 then why are you still here? y/n.89 shots fired (you're all wrong - I'm the favorite) landonorris popcorn is out and the girls are fighting
landonorris sad I wasn't invited for this interview
motorsportsproductions next time mr. Norris, next time
y/n.nation half of these interviews made me cry
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y/ndoesiconicshit so, y/n dyed her hair navy and red just for a RedBull commercial? she is COMMITTED - sad that she eventually got back to her blond hair
liked by lastlaplando, maxiel-lover, and 170 others
y/n.nation sorry to tell you but these were wigs, y/n mentioned it once in an interview :(
y/ndoesiconicshit NOOOOOOOOOOO y/n-on-top her hair would have been crispy af if she actually dyed it
formula1fan when I tell you I switched teams because of this commercial
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y/ndoesiconicshit y/n put out bts pictures of her first photoshoot and lemme tell you - I am in LOVE
liked by y/n.nation, pitstopfailure, and 239 others
f1-today this photoshoot was everything to me
y/n-loves-me people better be glad that y/n chose to be a driver and not a model
formula_uno the way that half the drivers could be models if they quit their day jobs
y/n_updates those pictures are on my wall
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y/ndoesiconicshit apparently y/n wasn't ready when Max came to pick her up before media day - so she got ready in the car (what a queen)
liked by y/n-lover, y/n_fan, and 361 others
piastri_81 the way she's so unbothered, in her vlog from that day she sounded so chill while max was freaking out about being late
icon-y/n I quote "max what would they do? fire us? yagirl89 the follow up "YES" and then the "oh" had me dying
lastlaplando her skin is flawless - she needs to drop that skincare routine asap
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y/ndoesiconicshit y/n's birthday was wild - y/n hinted at what happened but nothing was confirmed. all we know is that the wags took her out to celebrate the night of and they all went radio-silent (max and Arthur were panicking)
liked by change_ur_f-car, formula1fanatic, and 613 others
f1_wags apparently they went to a club where phones weren't allowed for privacy reasons
y/ns_oneandonly the leaked videos tho were hilarious
y/n-and-wags but the outside videos of Arthur and Max coming to get her melted my heart
maxiel-lover i NEED the details like water - y/n better drop them
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y/ndoesiconicshit y/n at the premier of the Formula 1 film "Can't Catch Me" starring Tom Holland - when she stepped out on the red carpet ALL cameras went to her, like no one else was photographed during this time
liked by y/n.89, arthurxy/n, and 729 others
tomholland-fan DID ANYONE NOTICE Y/NS CAMEO THO
y/n.nation I thought that woman looked familiar! y/n.89-love where was she! I'll go back and watch it just to find her tomholland-fan it was when Tom's character needed to go to the mechanics for his Honda - she was the one he talked to and she was also at the end race as a engineer as well!
RedBull.nation the way everyone held their breaths when she stepped out of the car, the only sound was the clicks of the cameras and then the crowd just erupted in a roar to get her attention
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Start of the actual chapter!
Your sunglasses sat perched on your nose as you sat in the back seat of whatever rental you were in for the day. Your fingers swiped the screen of your iPhone, constantly switching videos before they could even finish. Vito sat next to you, looking out the window as he talked to someone on the phone. Words about contracts, signings, photoshoots, and interviews rattled around in the car. The driver turned the wheel as he pulled up to the studio. The car lurched as it came to a stop. 
Vito quickly hung up on the phone with a short goodbye. You turned off your phone before you stepped out of the car. 
“What was that all about?” you asked as he guided you to the front of the building. 
You heard the click of his phone as he locked it and opened the door. You said a quick thank you as you were blasted with the air conditioning. 
“Just some calls I had to make. Lots of people are wanting to interview you kid. I have to make sure that they’re not just using you or plan to ask you stupid questions.” His fingers flew over the screen, probably typing yet another email. 
You just nodded. Vito had taken care of you for so long, he’d take care of you now. You knew how dangerous the media was, especially as a woman in your occupation. 
The two of you followed a long hallway down to a big room where cameras and other filming equipment were set up. Right now, Max was in the middle in his racing suit working on poses. Since he was the 2023 champion, you guessed he’d be doing what he did last year and the year before. But you’ll have people know you tried to convince him to do an actual pose, but he was resilient against your puppy eyes. 
You however had no clue what pose you were going to do. So, you were really hoping that someone would be able to assist you. 
Max quickly glanced at you and shot you a smile before being directed to pay attention. His smile melted and his stone-cold façade showed up. You wanted to shiver since you knew that Max was this big softy that had been broken down by the villainous persona that had been built by cut scenes and misplaced wording. You’d rather go back in time to tell little Max that he wasn’t the big monster everyone said he was than win a world championship. But because time travel hasn’t been confirmed – yet, you’d stick with helping present Max and work toward your own championship. 
You were ushered to a small changing room where your new race suit was hung up. Your fireproofs were neatly folded and were lying on the small bench. The shoes sat next to them. This year, the suits were a bit different. Max and you had voiced how much you liked the matte gold and navy look. Yes, the navy and red were the big staple colors of Red Bull, but you could do well with a little pizzaz. 
So the design team listened and made the red a sub color. The lettering and stripes down the sides were gold. The bulls on the main logos were gold as well. Red lined the seams as well as being the main color for all the sponsorship logos. 
The one thing that Max was happy about was that the hats stayed the same. He had too many from the year before to not be able to wear them. You didn’t see the appeal as you were more prone to hat hair than he was. 
You put on the all navy fire proofs before stepping into the thicker race suit. You kept the outer layer on your hips as you sat down on the bench to lace your shoes. Standing up, you noticed a mirror. You walked over and just took a moment to look at yourself. 
Possibly for once in your life, you liked the way you looked. The once dark circles under your eyes had finally gone away with some good sleep. Your hair looked more shiny and healthy and you had put on some good weight in the form of muscles that were needed to steer the car. Your trainer had put you through vigorous training, but it was all to help you prepare. 
A knock on the door let you know that they were ready for you. Vito stood to the side with your 2024 helmet. You were known for switching your helmet almost every other race in Formula 2. Your argument was that you just had too many good ideas not to use them. To keep it simple, you went with a full navy helmet with gold logos to match the suits. 
Some of the Red Bull team had mentioned that your helmet looked similar to Sebastian Vettel’s helmet. You only shot them a sly smile, basically telling them everything they needed to know. And it’s not like you didn’t know the German racer, quite the contrary. And did he give you his blessing to take inspiration from his glory days at Red Bull? The probability was huge. 
But again, people really didn’t need to know that either. 
All you knew was that the helmet matched to a tee, and it would be lucky to be used for more than 10 races. You had a list where you’d use special helmets. Vito was already on it with getting them ordered. You didn’t pay him to not order multiple custom helmets per year. He was already used to your antics. 
You shook hands with multiple people before walking over to Max. You took your place next to him. 
“So what’s the plan. I go left, you go right, and we leave with a giant explosion behind us? Taylor Swift Bad Blood style?” 
Max wheezed through his nose, not expecting your full-proof plan. 
From behind, Vito spoke up, “There will be no explosions. Here’s the plan. The producers talked to me and they actually want Y/n’s segment to go last as like a ‘surprise’.”
You interrupted him, “But people already know I’m driving.” 
Vito sighed before continuing. “I know. It doesn’t make sense but they’re the bosses for today. So they want Max to hold your helmet, turn to the left and hand it off screen. Then the camera would cut to you ‘taking it,’ you’d look down, and then put it on.” 
Your hands flew up. “So I don’t get to do the pose I rehearsed and Max doesn’t get to continue to look dead inside?” 
Max looked at you and squinted. “You didn’t have a pose ready. You were just texting me and panicking that you didn’t have one.” 
You only pouted after his confession. 
Max went ahead and redid his segment. This time, he did manage to do a little smile, just because you were the one taking the helmet and you made a weird face at him. 
The film techs said that the last take with the smile was the best one. And to Max’s chagrin, it would be the one to be used in the official video. 
You were told to stand on the massive X in the middle of the background. You were looking around at all the lights as someone helped you fix your hair. You hadn’t done anything pretty with it because it wasn’t realistic. You had never curled your hair and done anything special with it on race day. People would always find your hair in a braid, bun, or a Founding Father’s ponytail. And today was no different. 
You took a bit of time to actually make a nice braid that sat on your shoulder. Made you feel a bit like Katniss Everdeen. 
Speaking of, you wanted to have a little bit of fun. Your nickname wasn’t Kid for a reason.
“And action.” 
Your hand scrunched into three fingers that rose to your mouth for a kiss and then was lifted above your head. 
“I volunteer as tribute!” 
A couple of giggles filled the studio. Max and Vito were trying their best not to laugh out loud too much behind the camera. 
“Cut! Let’s try it again!” 
Your segment took about three more tries to get correctly. One of them, you accidentally dropped your helmet. Another, the helmet wouldn’t go on properly with your braid on your shoulder so you had to move it and undo it, so that you didn’t look like you didn’t have hair – the ponytail worked better. And then the third take was perfect. 
Max had been the one to hand you the helmet off screen and you did the opposite that he had done. You started off with a small smile, before going cold faced when you put the helmet on. You tried not to giggle once the thing was one since it felt weird without the balaclava. But you managed to keep your shoulders still until the man yelled Cut once more. 
You, thankfully, were allowed to now go change out of the hot suit. A Red Bull manager was the one to take the suit from you and hold on to it until preseason testing, which was going to be in a few weeks. You knew that when you said goodbye to Max as the place, it wouldn’t be too long until you would see him again. 
Wasn’t like you were ten minutes away, or that you didn’t work together, or that you somehow had the same simulator testing times just to catch up on what you missed during the week. But during the last few weeks, you spent more time with Arthur. 
He had called you in tears once he finally got confirmation that he was going to be out of Formula 2 and then cried once more when he had to leave the Ferrari Academy program. Your heart just ached and ached for him when you held him. 
You remember when he finally opened up a few nights after. 
You were bundled up in a giant blanket. He had come over to your apartment since Charles was staying with their mom for a few days while his apartment was being remodeled. Arthur’s head was tucked in your neck as a random movie played on the screen. 
He had finally spoken up. 
“You know. I really knew from the moment that I couldn’t continue karting all those years ago that racing just wasn’t for me. It never was.” 
You looked down at his face that was stained with tears. “Thur, don’t say that.” 
He only shrugged. “It’s true. If it wasn’t maybe Papa would have chosen for me to continue racing. And I know I begged Charles to be selfish, but maybe now I’m wishing I hadn’t.”
Your hands grabbed his face and made him look up at you. 
“Please don’t say that. Please.” 
By now, you had your own tears staining your face. 
“Because if you weren’t in Formula 2 this year, I would have never met you.” You took a breath. “My best friend wouldn’t be my best friend without it.” 
His eyes closed as he nodded little nods, almost as if he was having a hard time excepting what you called the truth. 
“I just feel like I don’t have a purpose anymore. You and Charles have racing, Maman has her store, and Lorenzo has the business. I have nothing.” 
Your arms wrapped around his figure. “We’ll find something and figure it out together. If anything, you can follow me to all my races.” You had a shit-eating grin on your face. A small laugh escaped his lips and you took that as a win. 
“What, and be your WAG?” 
You elbowed the Monegasque. “Sure. That’s exactly what I’m going for. I think I’ll have separation anxiety without you.” 
“Then that’s what I’ll do. Or unless I find something else.” 
“That’s all I ask. For you not to give up Thur. We’re in this new world together.” 
Arthur, feeling bold, laced his hands with yours. You were thankful for the dark room so he couldn’t see your red cheeks. 
“Together.”
And together is what you did for the remaining weeks. You and Arthur scoured every possibility he had to get back into racing. You reached out to many people – people who knew your godfather well and had helped you back with karting. You also reached out to many other people who normal fans didn’t know you knew. 
On this list, which Arthur had a hard time believing, were people like Sebastian Vettel, Kimi Räikkönen, Jensen Button, and Nico Rosberg. 
Arthur had tried to persuade you to not go to all your famous connections, but you were on a mission. He even threatened you that he wouldn’t take any offer since he didn’t want you to feel like he was using you. You only threatened him back when you told him that you wanted to do this and didn’t mid at you. You believe that you scared him since he never questioned you again. 
It was the day before preseason testing in Bahrain before you got an offer, or actually two, back. Arthur, keeping his promise to follow you until he found something, came with you. He was under the guise of being with his brother for support, but most knew that he was actually there for you. 
The first one came from a face time call from four time champion Sebastian Vettel. 
“Kind, it’s good to see you!” Sebastian’s voice echoed in your hotel room. Your laptop was on the desk. You sat on the second bed while Arthur sat in the rollie chair. Before, the two of you had argued about who got what seat. You sadly lost the game of rock-paper-scissors and was banished to the bed. 
“It’s good to see you too Seb! How are your kids?” 
A squeal could be heard from behind his office door. Sebastian smiled at the sound of his children. 
“They’re doing just fine. How are you doing Arthur? I know that losing a seat is hard but I was delighted to hear from Y/n when she told me that you weren’t giving up racing entirely.” 
You shot Arthur a knowing grin as to say “see, you still have a spot in this world with me.” 
Arthur spoke up, “Ah, yes sir. I was a bit discouraged. But she somehow convinced me to not give up.” 
Sebastian clapped his hands. “Well I do have an offer for you. However, it wouldn’t be for this year and maybe not the next. There will be a lot of preparation but I know you could handle it.” 
Arthur shot him a shy smile. “I’m down for anything at this point.” 
“Well, I have been in the talks about endurance racing. And as you know, I am getting a bit older, but I still want to be involved. So I need to come up with a team. I would either be a driver or the team leader, I have yet to decide. But that means I need to start creating a team.” 
The young Monegasque took a moment to bring everything in. “So you’re asking me to be on your future team. Even after all the mistakes I made in Formula 2?” 
The German winced. “You are just like your brother. A bit too self-deprecating but we can work on that. Like I told Charles, don’t waste it. Don’t waste your talents away by not trying. We will have to do months and months of training as to get over making mistakes, but that’s also part of life. We just need to learn from them. So what do you say?” 
The rest of the facetime call was filled with tears, smiles, cheers, and talks of sending over contracts to go over. You and Arthur were over the moon. 
He might not be racing in 2024 or even 2025, but he’d be doing something. 
Now, the next two offers came during media day when you had testing. Nico Rosberg and Jensen Button had apparently been looking for the two of you the entire day. Thankfully, it was just media and Max was the one to drive the new livery around for everyone to see. You just got to sit back and relax, well, as much as you could when you weren’t discussing data. 
Nico and Jensen both cornered you when they had the chance. 
“Good to see you again Brittany.” You shot Nico a smirk when you exchanged greetings. Arthur, polite as ever, shook both men’s hands. 
You smiled at the two older men. “Now to what do we owe this pleasure of this fine Tuesday?”
The two former drivers looked at each other before they casted their gaze at Arthur. 
Jensen spoke first. “We just want to preface about how terrible we feel about you losing your Formula 2 seat. It was your rookie year and you had some pretty bad luck.” 
Your eyes rolled. “Way to rub salt in the wound Button.” 
He shot you a glare, but Nico spoke next. “However, we have a solution. Y/n here told us about your taken offer from Sebastian. And we know that there are going to be weekends that you won’t have anything to do. So to save you from quote on quote from Miss L/n here ‘separation anxiety from missing your best friend’ we are offering you a type of paid internship at Sky Sports.” 
Jensen cut in, “Obviously you would be helping either Nico or I depending on what weekend, but you’d be interviewing, commentating, or taking videos of drivers throughout the race time.” 
Arthur had sparkles in his eyes, but you knew they were probably tears. With this offer, he’d be closer to you and his brother. You knew he didn’t want to be alone somewhere while you two were living his old dream. Well, it could still be his dream, but he told you time and time again that it was easier to put the Formula 1 dream in the past so that he could move on. 
That day was also filled with smiles and contract talks. 
Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday were filled with you in the new RB20. If the fans thought last year was a rocket ship, this one had to be some type of vehicle from a Sci-Fi movie cause you think it was even faster. 
But, the Ferraris and McLarens were very close behind. The end of the weekend determined that Red Bull was still on top as you were able to take the fastest time out of the whole weekend, while you and Max did the most laps. 
You were practically vibrating in the debrief meeting from excitement. What this year would hold, you didn’t know. 
But you couldn’t wait to get started.   
y/n.89 has posted
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y/n.89 it's go time
liked by arthur_leclerc, sebastialvettel, box_box_express, and 65,294 others
y/n.nation babygirl's new helmet - I'm in love!
sebastianvettel I see you're coming for my spot as Red Bull's golden child
maxverstappen1 sorry that was me, I have taken the seat y/n.89 sit down max, there's a new golden child
box_box_express middle picture is slaying
y/n-on-top I mean she did graduate from the university of servington with a degree in cuntology and slay sciences y/n.89 PERIOD
arthur_leclerc photo creds would be nice...
y/n.89 sorry ThurThur - EVERYONE ARTHUR TOOK THE MIDDLE PICTURE JUST LETTING YOU KNOW landonorris ok then.
redbullracing rookie of the year right there
y/n.89 I'm the only rookie? but thanks admin :D
iamred_iamyellow everyone was so close with only a few seconds separating the top three
ferrari'slastchamp this year is our year the-bulls sure - you all say that EVERY YEAR
f1 only six more days! see you drivers in the paddock
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missshirophantom · 1 month
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Yandere Alphabet Sebastian Solace
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From the author: hello everyone. I apologize for the abrupt disappearance after the first posts. There was a lot of shit going on in real life. And now especially, especially when I almost had a panic attack. This post... a small attempt to somehow cope with all the emotional problems. Ahem, I apologize for the mistakes, because English is not my native language and I used a translator. Yes, and I just got over it now... Tears, that's it. If I feel better (and a positive reaction will be enough), then I will write a small sketch using this post.
Warning: dr#g use without consent, threat of broken bones, threat of bondage, slight isolation, hint of c#nnib#lism. If you are for the fact that yandere Sebastian is gentle or dark, then you are absolutely not here. The author does not approve of the above written in real life.
Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
— Due to so many years of literal torture and DNA implantation, Sebastian has forgotten how to show love and affection. At least, that's what many people imagine.
— Thanks to vague memories of his past, he often gives "gifts". These are usually very rare deceased marine life that he found while exploring the complex. Most often, he drags soft objects such as pillows and blankets to another person.
— It is worth considering that he will often be... Biting his beloved is not strong, of course, but deep enough and in prominent places so that the bite mark remains as long as possible.
— In rare moments, Sebastian can clamp his beloved with his tail and hands, preventing them from moving. Such moments last quite a long time — from several hours to even days. But don't be afraid, he will feed you.
— About feeding... Sometimes Sebastian intentionally brings dead marine life and forces the beloved to eat them raw, saying that he did not find a normal meal for you, and that's all he found, and there is no necessary equipment to cook.
— And I. Don't even think about giving up this "meal", because he can get very angry at you the longer and more persistently you refuse.
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
— This case can be described as follows: rarely, but aptly.
— Sebastian hates people, especially getting dirty in their blood. But when the threat is directed either at him, or at the beloved, or at his refuge, then... Yes. It's better not to see it. In particular, you don't need to know where that poor guy's body goes next.
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
— Despite his hatred of people, which he skillfully hides by contacting them in his store, especially if you are a person yourself, but in moments of his bad mood, Sebastian can mock you. Especially when you are trying to escape or are somehow stubborn, protesting against his actions and the like.
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
— It all depends on how his beloved behaves. If they try to escape more than once, he will give them a "medicine" in order to keep them in a sluggish and weakened state in the shelter.
— Well, he also locks them in a shelter while he goes out to get supplies. For good behavior, they may not even tie you up and tie you to the railing of the stairs.
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
— It's not much... It is difficult, especially when Sebastian vaguely remembers his life before his arrest and experiments.
— But if he is in a good mood, he can talk about his past. Especially about his cat, whom he misses.
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
— Definitely an annoyance. And the stronger and longer the beloved resists, the stronger his irritation, turning into anger.
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
— Sebastian does not consider this a game, even though he finds it funny to watch the escape attempts of the beloved and their plans for this. But still, he is serious that even for the sake of his "fun" he does not allow another to escape.
— So, yes. the DNA of the same white shark, which awakens in him the instincts of pleasure over the attempts of another to escape.
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
— Oh, definitely quite strong and a decent dose of "medicine" if the beloved misbehaves for too long. Sebastian rarely uses physical punishments. Except when he is very, very driven. Then he will definitely break a couple of bones in his legs.
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
— Sebastian just doesn't know. The arrest and experiments forced him to think about the present, not the future. Especially when there is a looming danger over him because of his mutations. And not only that.
— But somewhere in the tender moments with his beloved, he definitely thought about having a family with them. And also a safe place where they both don't need anything and no one bothers them.
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
— As long as the other person does not speak directly and flirt, or God forbid, does not try to touch the other, then Sebastian is ready to be patient. And if any of this happens, he immediately throws this person out of his store and forbids him to come back. Believe me, this is the mildest thing he can do in bouts of jealousy.
Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?
— Believe it or not, but it's pretty good, let it depend on the mood. Sebastian definitely likes to hold his beloved with his tail and sleep in this position, curled up in the "nest". Bite them, thereby marking them. As it was written above, he gives, albeit sometimes gloomy gifts: dead marine life, someone's bones. But it's definitely nice to get the same pillows and blankets from him. On particularly "lucky" days, he may even bring some simple puzzles, blank paper, and writing supplies. Or even the clean clothes of the employees! And also, as it was written, he definitely likes to watch the beloved eat the food he brought.
— However, do not try to annoy him in any way or, God forbid, make him angry. And even if nothing serious happens for the first time, it's better not to push your luck.
Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
— He will definitely compose a little poetry and read it to you. But mostly his love language, if you can call it that, is gifts, not particularly frequent physical contact, as well as... preening when Sebastian's mood is definitely high. He likes to mess with the hair of his beloved, untangling tangles with his claws and cleaning them from dirt. But it's definitely somehow caused by injected DNA and getting some instincts. Well, Sebastian can also be a good gentleman.
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
— Yes. Quite a lot if you continue to test his patience.
Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
— It varies depending on how much his patience is exhausted. If he speaks from the most harmless to severe punishment, then it goes something like this: stronger and deeper bites that leave a scar; short-term deprivation of food; small doses of "medicine"; medium doses; a large dose; broken bones, usually legs.
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
— Freedom, defined. Sebastian will definitely lock the beloved in the shelter while he goes on business. But even without that, he still has no intention of letting them out of his sight, especially when they are not the first to try to escape or behave badly.
— It will also definitely monitor your meals with extreme care and sleep patterns.
Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
— Surprisingly, he is quite patient. But even such patience has its limits.
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
— Sebastian will refuse to believe that their beloved has died. By that time, he will have time to get very attached and it will be a blow to him. So be prepared for the fact that he will simply lose the remnants of his humanity and will babysit your body by locking himself in a shelter.
— Well, if it's an escape... It won't be difficult for him to find you. He knows this place like his own... "Five" fingers. Plus, his senses are highly developed, as are his newfound instincts.
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
— Definitely not for both questions. And even if Sebastian hated people and if you are a person yourself, he will not let you go.
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
— After the accusation that he did not commit, years of experimentation on him, torture, as well as the loss of some memories, you evoke in him... Something really different and new, amidst all this hatred and irritation. This feeling made him relax a little, feel the warmth in his chest and just made his barely controlled instincts calm down.
— You can say that he is really curious. Plus... Years of loneliness in this cruel situation are making themselves felt.
Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
— Definitely a confusion. Why do you want to come back at all? There, on the surface, you will find a much more cruel world than here, next to it. Yes, the conditions here are not so good, but it is much better than sitting behind bars in a dirty cell or, God forbid, being a test subject of these disgusting people.
— Despite the confusion, Sebastian understands these feelings. But he definitely didn't want to watch the situation worsen. He will definitely give you "medicines" to let you forget, but he will not work hard with it. After all, Sebastian does not want to be like the people who conducted experiments on him.
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
— Not really.
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
— It's definitely that Sebastian has become a monster, without a shred of humanity. Despite everything, he still misses the time when he was human, and these words will infuriate him. Plus, the same flashlight or flash in sensitive eyes. This disorients him for a few seconds.
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
— Mentally? Not much. Physically? Quite a lot, and it depends on how much you've exhausted his patience.
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
— It depends on a lot of things. From the time you are with him, situations have occurred, especially those related to your life. The longer you stay with him and the more situations there are related to your life, the more he will begin to take care of you. But as for the conquest, this is another story and much longer, because Sebastian lost that normal part of himself, acting on the basis of instincts and vague memories.
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
— It depends on the situation.
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
— Oh, Sebastian, which is a little surprising, will try to prevent this. He doesn't want a man like you to become even a little bit like him.
387 notes · View notes
leclercsainzz · 1 year
Note
hey hun!
could you write a smau with actress!reader x charles where charles is literally whipped for his gf and maybe reader is in the new barbie movie and he can’t stop talking about how proud he is and stuff like that and the fans and other drivers make fun of how whipped he is
thx xx 🩷
INTO YOU
PAIRINGS: charles leclerc x actress!reader
TYPE: social media au
yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55 and 518,028 others
yourusername: pretty in pink! 🩷
view 7,929 comments
charles_leclerc: you look mesmerizing
charles_leclerc: baby, you are looking gorgeous 😍
charles_leclerc: forever proud of you!
↳ yourusername: i love youuuu <33
user: the way he hype’s her up, i cannot 😭
↳ user: i need me a man like that ASAP
francisca.cgomes: stunning!!
isahernaez: obsessed with you and your beauty 😩
↳ charles_leclerc: same!
carlossainz55: i cannot stop looking at these - charles
↳ carlossainz55: yn, come get your man! he keeps refreshing this post every 5 seconds just to comment
↳ sebastianvettel: what is it that teens say nowadays? ah, yes .. he’s WHIPPED!
user: you’re so pretty, I CAN’T 😭
user: how does charles get this beauty all to himself?!??
user: call me charles cause i’m also a simp for you 😌
yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, dualipa and 540,619 others
yourusername: this barbie is a certified genius #thebarbiemovie
view 8,510 comments
user: tuRN IT UP, WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE!! 🔥
charles_leclerc: so proud of you, my love!! ❤️
user: screaming, crying, throwing up .. can’t wait!!
charles_leclerc: the prettiest barbie ever!
↳ yourusername: my biggest fan 😘
dualipa: you’re a real beauty!
user: she truly is barbie and then there’s charles
↳ user: she’s everything, he’s just ken
user: charles is one lucky ass man, i swear 😭
↳ charles_leclerc: that i am:)
↳ user: i hope you know how to fight
lewishamilton: charles sent this to the group chat and DEMANDED we all watch this
↳ user: ooh, to be in this gc
user: i cannot wait to watch this!!
charles_leclerc and yourusername
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liked by yourusername, arthur_leclerc and 683,893 others
charles_leclerc: first of all i want to start of by saying happy 3 year anniversary, chéri!! with all that you’ve accomplished over the years, i can’t help but be immensely proud of you and your hard work .. i’m glad to have you around and blessing my life in ways you’d never imagine … thank you for being my biggest supporter and lightning up my mood every chance you get! i love you will all my heart, baby!! ❤️
tagged: @yourusername
view 8,841 comments
yourusername: omg, you’re making me cry:(
yourusername: thank you, bby! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ❤️
user: i’m noT crying, you are
carlossainz55: please tell me yn bought that t-shirt for you
↳ charles_leclerc: if it helps you sleep at night then yes
maxverstappen1: that t-shirt, mate 💀 someone’s WHIPPED
lewishamilton: confirmed: charles is yn’s biggest fan
↳ pierregasly: 😭😭 not even yn’s fans are this obsessed
↳ carlossainz55: the BIGGEST simp out there
user: the waY the other drivers are coming for him 😂
user: cRYING OMG 😭
user: the way they’re each other’s biggest supporter 😩
danielricciardo: i was about to comment “cute” until i saw the last picture you posted ….
↳ user: danny, please 💀 let the man live
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yoursername
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liked by charles_leclerc, estebanocon and 548,792 others 
yourusername: european premiere in london for barbie & race week officially completed ✔️❤️
view 6,847 comments
user: the way she went to support him even though she had to attend the premiere later on 😭
↳ user: don’t forget he attended the premiere with her too
↳ user: smh, and i can’t even get a respond
charles_leclerc: forever proud of you!! ❤️
↳ yourusername: back at you;) 😘
user: meanwhile my bf can’t do the bare minimum
user: they’re the reason i believe in love, i swear 😩🤍
danielricciardo: did you tell margot robbie i love her?
↳ yourusername: of course!! (charles sent you a vid)
user: every couple wishes they were them
carlossainz55: meanwhile charles leclerc starstruck by his own girlfriend at the premiere
↳ maxverstappen1: he’s acting as if he doesn’t live with her and sees her 24/7 💀
↳ yourusername: 😭 i can’t with ya’ll
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yourusername and charles_leclerc
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liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 586,931 others
yourusername: get you someone who looks at you and appreciates you the way he does!! 😚
tagged: @charles_leclerc
view 7,629 comments
charles_leclerc: i’m addicted to you
↳ yourusername: me @ you 😩
charles_leclerc: i can never take my eyes off you, you’re too gorgeous, baby!!
charles_leclerc: you make me blush 🤭
↳ lewishamilton: confirmed: charles is the #1 simp
user: theY’RE MY PARENTS, yA’lL
user: the way he looks at her with such love 😭 i CANNOT
pierregasly: obsessive fan behavior, if you ask me
carlossainz55: i guess this is cute
↳ yourusername: guess???!??
↳ carlossainz55: it’s cute
user: this mf is sooo whipped!!!
↳ user: he’s just like me 💁🏻‍♀️
user: he better know how to fight cause i’m gonna steal his girl
↳ charles_leclerc: for the girl i love, absolutely
↳ user: mY HEART JUST MELTED WTF 😭
user: they say love is dead, but these two proved me wrong
2K notes · View notes
Text
How did it end?
Summary: A flashback to the night that changed your lives forever.
Pairing: past Joel Miller x fem. reader
Wordcount: 2.4k
Rating: T
Warnings: angst (so much angst), flashbacks, some really hurtful words, cursing, crying, pregnancy tests, Joel being a dick, Calvin being the best supportive brother
A/N: somehow I feel in my mind like this should have been worse, but I am sure you all do not feel like that at all so I'm sorry lol
follow @toomanystoriessolittletime-fics and turn on notifications to get notified when I post new fics
part three of invisible string
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Even before the outbreak you dealt with your anxiety or with big life decisions the same way.
You were stress cleaning. 
After walking out from Joel you made your way into the town centre, picking up your kids and then got back home where your brother Calvin was already trying to cook something but you mutually made the decision that you were gonna cook while he bathed the kids. 
You both did not want him to burn the house down.
He wanted to ask you how it went, having run into Maria on his way home from the Patrol meeting, who had told her that you had been at the clinic to see Joel. 
But this wasn’t the time or the place. 
It ended up being a nice evening all things considered. 
You had dinner, played some boardgames, read a good night stories to your kids and watched them sleep in their little beds until the nervous energy in your body left you walking back downstairs.
Once the house got quiet after the kids and you brother were asleep (he had an early morning with his first big day on Patrol the next day) you were alone with your thoughts. 
And your thoughts were loud, and demanded to be heard. 
So you went into the kitchen, took a look at all the cleaning supplies that were still stocked under the kitchen sink and got to work. 
You started with the top of the kitchen cabinets, standing on the counter as you scrubbed what felt like centuries of dust off of them until you were satisfied and moved to inside the cabinets. 
What a picture it would be if one of your new neighbours caught the crazy lady next door deep cleaning the kitchen at 2 am during the literal apocalypse.
Cleaning usually had the power to make the thoughts inside your head shut up. 
But as you emptied the cabinets so you could clean them inside, your mind drifted to the last time you had tried to deal with whatever was going on in your life by extensively deep cleaning every surface around you. 
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The Outbreak might have been an excuse for many people to let things like cleaning the place where they lived become unimportant. 
Which deep down it was of course.
Why have a clean kitchen when just down the street, behind the fences and walls the so called new government had pulled up, there were people and what once were people dying or fighting (or eating) each other?
But you always lived by the mindset of clean home, clean mind. 
And what you desperately needed right now was a clean mind. 
Two ten year old positive pregnancy tests you took this morning after feeling off for the last couple of weeks and missing you period were enough reason to freak out. 
But you couldn’t freak out. 
Joel would do that for you, you were sure. 
That was, if he ever decided to come home to you again after being on a run with Tess for the last four days. 
He hadn’t even told you or kissed you goodbye this time. 
You had woken up to a note on the kitchen table telling you that he’d be gone on a run with Tess and he didn’t know how long.
Something about your husband had changed in the last few months. 
It changed ever since Tommy left and Tess was his only influence outside of you. Not that you had much influence on anything he did nowadays. 
It wasn’t like he was the most attentive men to begin with. 
But you fell for him. 
You fell for the complicated, traumatised and closed off man who to this day was the most handsome man you had ever met. 
And deep down you knew he fell for you, mumbling his confessions of love into your skin when he thought you were asleep. 
It was the way he looked at you. 
The way he brought home a new book to read whenever he went out of the QZ. 
The way he made you forget about the fucked up word outside of the walls you made your home whenever he gave you his full attention. 
He wouldn’t have put a ring on your finger years earlier as you laid in his arms, asking you to be his until the day you both died, if he did not love you, would he?
You loved him, you loved him even when he seemed to make it his personal goal to make you hate him. 
He used to be home every night in the beginning. 
He used to love to spend time with you and you with him. Staying up just talking for hours if he wasn’t making love to you. 
Because even when he was fucking you, it felt different. More… intense. More passionate.  
He used to smile at you. 
By now you couldn’t remember the last time he smiled at you now. 
And by the time you had practically polished the whole shitty apartment you and Joel lived in it was dark outside and he still wasn’t home. 
In hopes he would be home and it would lift his mood you had made dinner that now sat cold on the stove.
It was after 11pm and you were tired, having been in the bathroom brushing your teeth when you heard the door unlock and open. 
A nervous flutter in your stomach made the dinner you had earlier almost come up but you took a deep breath, looking at yourself in the small mirror over the sink. 
You were wearing one of Joel’s old worn flannels, his familiar scent in your nose. 
What was the worst that could happen?
It was not like you could just turn back time?
You were pregnant and he just would have to deal with it. 
Right?
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You would never forget the way his eyes hardened once you said the words
„I am pregnant.“
He had been in a relatively good mood when you joined him in the small kitchen, having already taken his shoes and coat off, his hair damp from the rain outside. 
It made you reconsider telling him for a tiny moment, wanting to just enjoy this with him. But maybe he would not react like you thought he would? Maybe he would be happy?
You wanted to ask a million question about how it went but you were too nervous, having instead kissed his cheek with a whispered „I miss you“ and then offered to warm up some food for him. 
He had put his hand on your waist, his fingers brushing over your stomach as he went into the bathroom, his lips against your temple telling you that he would just take a quick shower. 
It was after he ate, the table cleaned that you told him. 
Sitting across from him at the tiny shitty table you had, your hands flat on the surface, the silence after you told him the news sickening.
His whole face had changed, expression hard, by the time he opened his mouth to speak. 
„Is it mine?“ He asked and you just blinked at him, speechless, your head falling back as if he had slapped you, before you answered. 
„What do you mean? Who else would it be? We’re married,“ you said and he scoffed. 
„Doesn’t mean you don’t open your legs for anyone else while I’m gone,“ he sneered and you flinched at the accusation and the tone he used. 
Sucking your bottom lip in you looked at your hands, still on the table, nodding your head slowly. 
„Good to know what you think of me after all these years,“ you whispered, still trying to process his words. 
„What did you think would happen? That I’ll be happy? Newsflash darlin’, this isn’t one of your dumb romance novels you keep reading,“ he said, before he brought his fist down on the table, making you jump. He got up from where he was sitting, walking over to the cabinet that held all the liquor he scavenged, opening the one bottle of original Jack Daniel’s and taking a long sip. 
„You gonna get rid of it,“ he said and you looked at him. 
„Excuse me?“ You asked. 
„Don’t want no kids of mine in this fucked up world. And especially not with you,“ he said and you felt slapped again. One blow after the next coming from him. You crossed your arms in front of your stomach protectively. 
You had imagined his reaction would be bad, but this wasn’t bad. This was destroying you.
„So that’s it, you don’t want a kid, and I have to just comply?“
„That’s exactly how it is, sweetheart,“ he grinned darkly at you, shaking his head and leaning against the wall and you desperately tried to find the tiniest part of the person you had fallen in love with as you looked at him. 
But there was nothing left. 
Maybe you just had been too blind to see it until now.
„I thought you loved me,“ you whispered, tears in your eyes. 
„How can someone love you? You thought because I put a ring on your finger everything would be okay? We’d be a happy little family and live in this shitty apartment in this shitty QZ while the world around us is fucking dying? How did you think this would go?“ He asked. 
„You made it sound like I planned this. Do you think I like this? Do you think I like being pregnant by a man who even though treated me like the fucking dirt beneath his shoes for the last months, was still the man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with?“ 
„Then get rid of it and we can get back to it,“ he said and you scoffed.
„You really think things are gonna get back to how they were after you said all that?“ You asked. 
He shrugged. 
„Where would you go? You have no family. No friends. All you have is me,“ he said. 
„And you’re so different? Who do you have? Tommy left because…“
„Do not talk about my brother,“ he threatened and glared at you. 
You shook your head, taking a deep breath. 
He was drunk. 
This was not going anywhere. 
This would never go anywhere.
„Things are not going to go back. I can find someone better than you on every corner,“ he said and you could not stop the sob that shook your body and you were pretty sure you could hear your heart breaking. 
„I don’t love you. I never did,“ he said and the tears you had tried to hold in finally fell. 
„Get rid of this, before I take care of it,“ he said, and a chill ran down your spine at his tone. 
„And then get the fuck out of my life.“
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You were in the last touches of finishing cleaning the kitchen when you heard footsteps coming down the stairs. 
You hadn’t even noticed the tears until Calvin pulled against his chest, his hand running soothingly up and down your back. 
„You wanna talk about it?“ He asked and you shook your head. 
„Not yet. Not ever if I’m honest,“ you mumbled and he chuckled. 
„Need to talk to him though,“ you said and leaned back, turning around to turn on the stove to heat up some water and make some tea for the both of you. Looking at the clock hanging on the wall you noticed that it was just before 5 am. 
„Don’t need to do anything,“ he said and opened the fridge, getting the lunch he had prepared the day before for his day out and grabbing some stuff to make himself a sandwich. 
„I can’t ignore him forever. As much as I would like to. He’s…. He’s here and he won’t go anywhere. Neither will we. So we have to…. Co-exist somehow.“
You both get to your tasks before you both sat down at the table, you with two mugs of tea, one for him, him with two sandwiches, one which he pushed towards you. 
„You still love him,“ your brother said after a while and you sighed, looking up at him. 
„Yeah. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t think I’l ever be able to forgive him for everything that happened,“ you smiled sadly. 
„Well,“ your brother said before he got up and put his plate in the sink.
„Then you should talk to him and tell him that so you can both move on with your lives.“
You followed him towards the front of the house where he put his shoes on and checked if he had everything in his little backpack for this first patrol. 
„What if he wants to be in their lives?“ You asked, nodding upstairs to where both your children were still sleeping. 
„Do you think he wants to? He made himself pretty clear from what you’ve told me,“ Calvin said. 
„I don’t know. It’s been a long time and he seemed…. He seemed really sorry? I just….“ You took a deep breath, shaking your head.
„Nope. I am not gonna spend any more time thinking about Joel Miller. I’m gonna go upstairs and take a two hour nap and then I’m gonna go and explore our new home while my children are learning stuff in an actual school,“ you said. 
„There you go!“ Calvin grinned.
„Be safe today!“ You said, grinning back and hugged him quickly. 
„You too,“ he smiled, before he opened the door, your face falling as you saw Joel stand on the porch, his hand held up in a fist as if he was about to knock. 
„I’m here to pick you up for patrol? Tommy’s gotta stay home today,“ Joel said as he looked between you and your brother. 
„Well that is gonna be fun,“ Calvin said, winking at you, before he stepped out and pulled the door shut behind him, giving Joel no chance to try to say anything more if he wanted to.
You watched them through the window next to the door as they walked down the porch and then down the street until they were out of sight. 
Letting your shoulders fall while you exhaled with a sigh you shook your head before you made your way upstairs. 
This was gonna be a long day. 
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pumpkin-bats · 2 months
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Speed Running SFW Alphabet - OP Boys Headcanons Pt 2.
Splitting the previous post because it was getting way too long.
Featuring: Cross guild members! Mihawk, Buggy, Crocodile.
Mihawk:
C for Cuddling - He doesn't really do/initiate cuddling. However! He doesn't mind if you're the one cuddling. Snuggling into his side while sitting together on the couch? Yes. Completely stuck close to you when asleep in bed? Absolutely!
G for Gifts - He's an average gift giver. He'll give you small things or especially fancy meals for holidays, birthdays, and special occasions. One thing to note, he ALWAYS gets you something you either really wanted to get or something you really needed.
U for Upset (angry) - He handles you being upset with a straight face, which often just makes you more upset. Despite this, the first thing he'll try to do is talk things out with you, before asking if you'd prefer to have some space.
V for Vaunt - He doesn't verbally brag about you to others, but he certainly does to you. He'll casually tell you every single thing about you he loves or finds impressive. His way of showing you off to others is to watch you do your thing, look at the other person, then gesture at you while nodding like saying 'see that? awesome.'
W for warrior - He's more of a lone fighter, and will often tell you that though he appreciates it, he doesn't necessarily need your help to fight. The times that you insist and do it anyway, he'll just smirk to himself while he fills with pride, and fight back to back with you.
T for Time - It took about a month for him to fully fall for you, and by month two he actually did something about it. So it wasn't really until three months in that you ended up dating.
R for Rhythm - Too Sweet for Me by Hozier
L for Love (language) - Acts of service is his main way of showing he loves you. He really enjoys doing things for you and taking care of you. He also enjoys spending quality time with you. Nothing puts him at ease like sitting in comfortable silence, reading a book beside you.
Buggy:
C for Cuddling - He adores cuddling but never admits that's what he does. He'll throw himself into your side or wrap himself around you and pretend it's because he just wants to lean on you, but it takes less than a minute for the leaning to turn into snuggling for him. He cuddles like a cat, big spoon, small spoon, face to face, doesn't matter. Just wants to be with you.
G for Gifts - He'll give you gifts for every gift giving occasion and also when you're feeling down to try and comfort you. He tries, and fails, to look casual about it but he secretly is very excited to see if you like the things he gets you.
U for Upset (angry) - You don't often get upset with him, so when you are he gets fairly surprised. Most of the time he'll try to argue back for a bit first but he always apologizes and immediately tries to work things out with you. He doesn't like it at all when you're upset with him, and half the time he gets upset back at you because he's upset that you're upset.
V for Vaunt - Oh he brags. He brags to everybody. Literally anyone who will listen. You'll be walking, holding hands, and he'll lean over to a nearby person and go 'that's my partner' with a smug grin. He's especially proud of your skills but his favorite thing to boast about is your laugh and smile.
W for Warrior - Fighting side by side with you is like a dance for him. He never feels more in synch with you than when you're fighting together.
T for Time - About four to five months. Mostly because it took time for you to adjust to the life he lives (and his massive, protective entourage), and for him to muster up the courage to say something. He didn't really believe that you liked him at first and it took some time to really let it sink in.
R for Rhythm - Hot To Go by Chappell Roan
L for Love (language) - He mostly shows his love for you through physical touch and words of affirmation. The amount of hugs from behind that he disguises as invading your space for fun and giggles is astronomical. Also he won't say much sentimental things up front, but when he does, it's some of the most romantic stuff you've ever heard come out of anyone's mouth ever. He denies having said anything after the fact though.
Crocodile:
C for Cuddling - His cuddling consists of having you in his arms or on his lap. He doesn't care about height or size, his arm is around you or you are basically plastered against him when it's time to cuddle (which is more often than you thought it would be).
G for Gifts - Too many. All the time. That's it. you need to stage an intervention with him at some point, it's getting ridiculous.
U for Upset (angry) - He won't lie, he finds it incredibly attractive when you get angry at him. He won't tell you that though, and he'll take you seriously, but the heat in your eyes makes him feel a certain type of way. He's more likely to give in when you're upset than to fight back, he doesn't like arguing with you for a multitude of different reasons.
V for Vaunt - He flaunts you in a classy way. He'll brag about your resilience and can't help the admiration on his face when he does.
W for warrior - He'd prefer you not to fight because he doesn't like the idea of you getting your hands dirty. Especially because he himself would rather not do the dirty work, therefore he wouldn't force that upon you either. But if you have to he'd rather be back to back so he can fight and defend you, knowing you're doing the same for him.
T for Time - It took about a year for you two to end up together. Given his circumstances, it takes him a while to trust and get to know you. When he does, he tries to court you formally instead of straight up confessing, which took longer than he meant it to. But you got there in the end so it worked out!
R for Rhythm - Sway With Me by Michael Bublé
L for Love (language) - The main reason he gets you so many things, gift giving, to show his love for you is because he wants to pamper you. He hopes that you can see how much he loves you through how much he can give you with what he has. When he's not doing that, it's physical touch. Gentle touches like rubbing your shoulder where his hand rests to show how much he cherishes you.
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despairots · 1 year
Note
miles 42 and miles 1610 are twins and fight over reader and try to impress her and stuff
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━━━━━━━━ talk about first impressions.
earth1610! miles morales x gn! reader x earth42! miles morales. fluff and warning, there’s some suggestive comments from grown adults. i started this yesterday but im posting once/twice a day until i burn myself out from writing and deleting requests. reader is like peni parker. ignore the description, my brain was idk.
please remember that in my last oneshot, earth 1610 miles will be spiderman and earth 42 miles will be the prowler, the two are vigilantes, keep that in mind. also you’re an anarchist lolsies!!1!1! the spanish translation might not be accurate. leaving this on a cliffhanger too LMFAO. you’re always an anarchist in these oneshots.
where the morales twins can’t help but fall for the technology nerd who can do a lot of things, trying to impress you and gift you stuff in public, and with you, obviously being a talented person, you apparently have a lot of admirers, especially weird, old, strange adults.
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you sighed in embarrassment at the two morales twins trying one up eachother with giving gifts to you or impressing you. some people would call you lucky, some would be jealous of you.
being fought over the two most attractive guys in brooklyn vision who may look the same but act like polar opposites is a nightmare.
the two may be extremely smart and artistic but they for sure, had different personalities.
miles morales is smart and passionate, committed to others before himself. he has a lot of love for science and art, which he got from his mother, making inventions since he was younger.
the two are both suckers for music, mixing beats as a hobby with their uncle aaron when they were younger.
miles is sociable around crowds, as even when he struggled to fit in after moving to brooklyn vision, would often start conversations with those he came across on the street.
though many of his acts are selfless, mikes is partly driven by low self-confidence in his own abilities, feeling smaller than he is.
since becoming spiderman, miles is extremely eager to help others. this is as much to his credit as it is to his detriment, as he will often put himself in grave, life-threatening danger, in his quest to protect his friends and those he cares about.
myles morales, on the other hand, may also be smart but he’s closed off only being carefree with you and his twin brother. he also has a lot of love for art, spray painting with his brother.
myles isn’t one to talk, again, he’s closed off and usually upholds a stoic persona, opposed to his brother who doesn’t have a problem showing how passionate and cheerful he is.
with him being the prowler, and technically being labeled as ‘spidermans rival’, ignoring that the prowler is his own being. he had a strong morality of protecting his family and you after his father had died.
to which leads him also going into life-threatening dangers.
“[name], do you have any idea how lucky you? like, i would die to be in your spot!” you rolled your eyes at that sentence, “then do it.” your snark reply made a few people in the hallway snicker.
now back to you, [name] [lastname], the robot-technology-hacking loving nerd that grew with the morales twins and them fighting over you, it’s not something that’s lucky.
that constantly one-upped eachother to gain your attention, to the point they wouldn’t HESITATE to embarrass eachother in front of you along with literally fighting who got the best present for you.
it didn’t help since you liked both of them, i mean, how couldn’t you not like them? they were literally labeled ‘most attractive boys alive’ and their personality didn’t help, why do you think you fell deeply in love?
“i got the best gift-“
“i did!”
your bestfriend, gwen stacy, sneaked her arm around you, “i obviously did.” she gave you a smug looked as you sighed in your hands with embarrassment, remembering the time you two accidentally kissed (more like pecked eachother on the lip).
you two vowed to never talk about that again but since that was two years ago, you guys are all 15 by the way, which you guys were 13 by the time she stole your first kiss.
the morales twins didn’t like that, uhh, next!
“ahora no es el momento, gwen.” you muttered, expressing massive stress from the two and the welcomed gwen, “i — uh, failed spanish.” you made a ‘that’s-the-point-‘ look.
“siempre suenas bien hablando en español.” myles commented, shooing gwen’s arm off your shoulder and throwing his arm over yours instead.
“get apagado de [nombre], myles.” miles rolled his eyes and scoffed at his twin, “at least i get an a+ in spanish.” miles gasped at the comment with offence.
“this is why you’re failing science, estúpido!”
“estoy siendo peleado por gemelos estúpidos.” you pinched the bridge of your nose before sneaking out between the twins quarrel, heading over to foam party.
did i mention that you won awards and was on the news for making a working robot suit and finding out how to time travel?
mutters and comments were heard in the coffee shop, irritating your already bad headache. ‘i hate society.’ you rubbed your temples, before ordering your drink and waited.
apparently those minutes of waiting, you got… weird, suggestive comments from grown adults. your face scrunched up every time they said something about you.
“that shirt really compliments your curves.”
you’re were just 15.
“you’ll find a person just like me.”
they were in their late 30s.
“how ‘bout instead of wasting your pretty little time in this coffee shop, you come to my place.”
you just wanted your coffee.
“can i get your number?”
stop.
“you’re really sexy.”
stop it.
they tried grabbing your hand.
“i’ll treat you better.”
stop it. they tried kissing your hand before someone clocked them in the face, “aren’t you an adult, man?” miles’ voice was heard beside your ear as he tried comforting you.
myles rubbed his knuckles with a grossed look on his face. they saw that they were harassing you as you tried to move away from them, worst thing yet, nobody tried to do anything.
they saw what was happening but didn’t help, god they really hated adults.
“acércate a ellos, y será mucho peor que un puñetazo en la cara.” they ran off, myles grabbed your order as the three of you left. it was quiet, too quiet for your looking.
“i could’ve handled that y’know—“ miles handed you a box, opening it to which showed a necklace with a charm that was your hacker logo. you could feel the myles’ eye twitched.
“remember i got [name] a car—“
“shut the hell up, man!”
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[name] after the morales twins keep giving them money and gifts.
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deesseshesca · 17 days
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PAC : What’s the secret message held in my drafts ? (18+)
What’s the secret message held in my drafts ?
For the one’s still holding on into my past self 
Good evening,pretty souls, today we are getting real personal … 
!!DON’T FORGET TO CHECK THE BIG SALE!!
KO-FI
Choose the image that’s speak to you and allow yourself to soak ONLY what’s reasoning with YOUR SITUATION 
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Rules and Disclaimer 
I am the type of tarot reader to say as it is. Nothing is sugar coated but everything is sent with good intention. If you are not ready to face some truth, you should vagabond somewhere else. 
MINOR DON'T INTERACT WITH THIS POST 
MINOR DON’T READ THIS POST 
Basing myself on the legal age in my country which is 18 
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 PILE 1 
What’s your sexual essence ? 
 3 pentacles (reverse), Hierophant (reverse), Empress (reverse), 8 pentacles (reverse), ‘’ I miss making love to you ! I will do anything to hold you again !’’ 
Check in : Y’all might be infertile or have difficulty conceiving. It could be because of a disease like endometriosis or PCOS. Others may believe you are because y’all been doing the pull out method for at least 3 years now and no kids. Really playing with your luck. Others have been celibate for at least 2 years now. 
Good morning pretty souls, 
 Y’all have a very creative sexual essence. You are down for literally anything. You rarely initiate anything but you are with whatever the vibes are. If your partner is into other people watching then  you are. If they are in BDSM, I guess your butt is perfect for some spanking now. If they are into anal or cum play, all of the sudden you 2. Is not in a way to be completely co-dependent because you get off on pleasing and being almost like a sex doll for the person you love. Emphasis on love, because y’all have an extremely low body count (less than 5), because you only ever really get sexually aroused by the person u be loving on. Y’all are bookworms and academic weapons but slutty all together. Also you communicate when you have sex. You don’t mind asking the person you love to move that way or touch like this or even to suck on that. The same way you like to know everything about your partner. You don’t mind asking them how to personally find a way to evolve pleasure for them. A new lover is making their way to you, Pile 2. What can I say ? You are born the irresistible.
Hey pretty souls, If you want to know how to use this energy to attract your future spouse, find your next lover or amplify your receive energy... you can book a reading on my Ko-fi or DM
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What  ''D'' appointment should you be manifesting ?
PILE 2 
Queen cups (reverse), strength, 5 pentacles, 6 pentacles (reverse), ‘’ I tried to replace you, but it did not work out because I'm madly in love with you & I was fighting it ! I know this is divine !’’, ‘’ I’m not happy in my current situation ! I’m miserable without you !’’ 
First thing that hit me was a sexual fantasy. You dream of having an affair. You are married. You are living the white fence nuclear family dream life. But one random night, you appear in front of your husband's boss, undressing. Looking the fuck good and smelling way too good. Why ? Just because. Like you want to prove yourself you still got it. What I am understanding from this fantasy is that you are NOT ready for commitment. Like you don’t mind the love. But you can ‘t fandom committing. You enjoy being chased and chasing a bit too much. Your reasoning is because: FUCK MAN. I’m hearing: ‘’Since they only see us as a baby machine, I’m only using them as an ATM.’’Ever since they started playing with abortion rights we have been FNF. If 
You ever make it to be a wife, you wish to be like Gloria in Modern Family. Rich, Hot and Kept. You are a real life fantasy. You are out here living  a totally different life, in the morning you present yourself to be the complete opposite of yourself at night. You might be a stripper by night and student by day. Nobody knows. 
M A N I F E S T A T I O N 
You need to manifest a ‘’D’’ appointment where you can leave with no remorse. You are giving soft dom. I’m seeing you entering an apartment with the key. Tights on and lingerie under your coat. Makeup looking good and hair slay. Throwing your keys on the counter and walking toward your sub (where you order him to be). He will spend the whole night pleasuring you while you edge him. Like he is so EAGER to please the fuck out you. You don’t care for anything but his tongue. That excites him, the fact that you don't give a damn about him. Then you stand up and get yourself together. Remind him that if he wants to cum you he has to send a deposit. You walk out in peace. You need someone you is eager for you, while you stay detached. Who will do anything to please you without stressing you, while you get your good good. 
MEN 
You guys fantasize about multiple women being too eager to please you, they dominate you.You want them  to slut you out.  I am sensing a mommy issue. But the way that you are looking for one. The way that you actually want to feel appreciated. You want girls to go crazy for you, because you want to feel enough. So good that you can’t be ignored. 
M A N I F E S T A T I O N 
Is not a manifestation no more, is a work in process. I see walking in the strip club looking sharp. Alone enjoying the view, throw some money on one that's worth sharing your fantasy with. The funny tuning you are not going towards the assertive one. You want the innocent one. Like is a challenge for both of you tonight. Y’all going to the VIP room. She gives a good lap dance and you ask her if she is down with your vision. When  she gives you her consent it is show time. I don’t sense any intercourse. Just mutual masturbation. Let’s not forget the euphoria of the whole situation will make the whole thing 10x better. You leave after giving a FAT tip. I don’t think you ever talk about that encounter. Like a secret between you and her. 
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FUTURE SPOUSE MESSAGE 18+
PILE 3 
Hapiness, Let it go (reverse), Leadership. OV : Grace , trust (reverse) 
‘’ Princess or Princeshë (depending on your ethnicities) 
Take, take, take…everything about me is yours to take. I belong to you. I only exist to worship you. There's not a single thing you can do to me in bed that can turn me off. I’m sorry, I always burst too quickly. Is practically impossible for me not to nut quickly when I see your big milkers. Soft with perky nipples. Don’t get me started when you wear your pretty lingerie. I can spend hours sucking  just like you like it. I love how sensitive that area is for you. Talking about sensitivity, I knew that the pink and bows were just a front. I mean you reveal it pretty quickly. When you started yelling at me for no reason in front of the bar like I was the reason why you could not have fun with your girls. That night was the beginning of good things for us. We match completing down to our soul tribe. The fact that my friends and yours mix so well is a blessing. What's even more awesome is that it does not seem to only be for our sake, they genuinely like to hangout together. Which is great, you know how anti-social I am. I can't make new friends for the  life of me and I can't talk to women either. That's why I am so grateful you yelled at me that night. Dress in a corset and thigh pink skirt and let's not forget the bows. Just like in your bedroom, bows, pink, dolls, makeup, shopping bags. I know we like to joke that if it was not for your roommate, you would feed us pink. But Princess, I love your antics, your bratty attitude is the biggest turn on. How can someone with a high pitched soft voice hold so much space? You stand your own leaving your shoes print on me. I can’t wait to feed your shoe addiction until your last breath.  I lust over your long nails, I lust over your attitude, I lust over your feet.  The best thing about you is that you are a very wet p@ssy. The way it cream easily and in big quantities is something I have never seen. I swear I love it, You thought I would switch up over a tarot reading. Babe I love your CREAMY P@SSY. I love when you take the lead, giving me head than stopping. Just to make sure I am looking at you, The way you ride me always sends me over the edge. The fact that you refuse to let ‘’jr’’ go to sleep after one round is a blessing and curse. . The only way to calm you down is to choke you. I love being the person you lean on when you need it. I love it when you ask me for help, when you run errands because you're tired and the way you are now allowing me to protect you. Your trust in me is MY most precious possession. But do you wanna know the thing that gets me very excited is imagining you in your dream house. That I build, walking around in your robe in morning followed by our big dog.  To get the kids ready for school after giving me head earlier in the morning. Giving you a happy ever after is my ultimate goal. 
Your forever Knight.
A) This is for my black hispanic babe especially. He loves playing with your coils/curls. He loves when you allow him to help you with your wash day. He loves your dark complexion.  I have a personal message for you, you are chosen in your bloodline to break the general curse  around marriage. I feel like your mom was raised by a single mom, and her mom raised by a single mom just like you. But babe if you allow him to help you, i swear he will show you the beauty in marriage and support. 
B) This for my blond Albanian baddie. You are used to seeing your Dad treating you mom like she’s the pearl of this world. Like she’s divine and you question yourself especially with the 50/50 men trend. Don’t worry baby, God knows what you deserve. Let the pressure of society slide on your back, You know what you deserve. And it's coming in a full pack (if you know what I mean) with a pink bow. 
Femdom, Dominatrix, Heels collection, makeup collection, libra venus, pink everything, long stilettos nails, back marks,  is giving me your ways and lets be friends. Cock warming, you are obsessed with his d, choking kink, he's not going nowhere, he loves it there. I am getting the opposite aesthetic, Opposite personality. He is tall, big, does not yell and hates swearing. You are short, curvy, all pink but curse and yell whenever. He comes from a good house but he's extended family is literally the representation of a karmic loop. 
Song : Do a b - Kalii
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miss-musings · 4 months
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Parallels between Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader and Crosshair from "The Bad Batch"
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GENERAL PERSONALITIES & EARLY LIFE
Both of them are fiercely loyal to the people they care about
Both of them are absolute SassMasters
Both have a scar/tattoo over their right eye
Neither had a proper childhood, as they were both trained for combat starting at a young age
Both have special abilities/enhanced senses compared to the average human, and they were trained (read: groomed) because of it
Both of them were part of a unique brotherhood (the Jedi and the clones, respectively) that, at one point, spanned the entire galaxy during The Clone Wars
Both have a complicated relationship with an older brother/father figure in Obi-Wan and Hunter, respectively
Both lost their right hands in a fight with an evil counterpart (Although, for Crosshair, this happens much later in his life)
POSSIBLE FORESHADOWING IN TCW Season 7?
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As I pointed out in a separate post, in "The Clone Wars" Episode 7.02 "A Distant Echo," we get a moment of foreshadowing with these two characters.
In the episode, Anakin and his friend/captain Rex and the four original Bad Batch brothers are on a rescue mission together. About halfway through the episode, there's a moment where the six of them split up to search a tower. They're basically at a T-intersection, and while the other four go one way, Crosshair and Anakin go the other.
(Link to a gif post of the moment here.)
These characters literally take the same path.
By doing so, they are separating themselves from their loved ones (Anakin from his friend Rex, Crosshair from his brothers) and choosing the opposite path.
I realize this might've been unintentional on the writers' part, because I'm not sure if "The Bad Batch" series was in production yet when TCW Season 7 released, but holy hell! That's some insane foreshadowing right there!!
THEIR TURN TO ‘THE DARK SIDE’
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Both betrayed their brothers and other loved ones by deciding to serve the Empire, and it's around the same time in-universe
Order 66 specifically becomes a pivotal moment in their respective stories. For Anakin, it's when he first takes on the name and mantle of Darth Vader and exterminates the Jedi; for Crosshair, it's when he's first torn away from his family due to the Empire's mind control via the inhibitor chip
Both have at least one opportunity to come back but decide to continue serving the Empire/Dark Side of their own accord (Anakin on Mustafar in ROTS // Crosshair on Kamino in TBB S1 finale)
While their battle attire was dark-colored before they betrayed their loved ones and started serving the Empire, afterward, both characters start wearing all-black armor
Despite all their loyalty and sacrifices, their masters/employers are ready to throw them away the minute they find a better or more convenient replacement
Both were burned while trying to kill their older brother/father figures
Both initially had hair, but after being burned and getting scarred on their heads, we only ever see them bald on-screen
Both seem to suffer from an "in for a penny, in for a pound" mindset, which is partly why they stay with the Empire for so long
While serving the Empire, both commit all of the war crimes!! 😬
Both have multiple scenes of them killing their own officers/troopers, and they both seem to take some amount of pleasure in doing so
Blinded by anger and rage, both are ready to hunt down their older brother/father figures at a moment's notice, and ultimately attempt to kill them several times (Vader in the "Obi-Wan Kenobi" series // Crosshair in TBB Season 1)
Both attempt to kill their own kid at least once. (Vader in ANH // Crosshair in TBB Season 1)
(Side note: if you don't think of Crosshair as one of Omega's dads, I recommend you review my post about S3 Crosshair speed-running Hunter's Dad Arc and/or my CrossDad S3 episode ranking. Because, if you're not on board with the idea that Crosshair is Omega's dad, you're not going to enjoy the rest of this post.)
THEIR REDEMPTION & FINAL MOMENTS
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There’s a whole plot line about them trying to find their kid at a secret base (Vader in ESB // Crosshair in TBB Season 3)
When confronted by their kid, both characters believe they are undeserving or too far gone to be forgiven/redeemed (Vader: "It is too late for me, son" // Crosshair: "Omega. Don't risk anything for me. I belong in here.")
At some point, both characters' kids challenge them on their true intentions and decisions to stay with the Empire. (Luke to Vader: "Then my father is truly dead." // Omega to Crosshair: "I wanted to believe it was the inhibitor chip that made you like this, but I was wrong.")
Both of them ultimately find redemption and forgiveness because their blonde kid refused to give up on them (Luke to Vader: "I know there is good in you. The Emperor hasn't driven it from you fully." // Omega to Crosshair: "You're still their brother, Crosshair. You're my brother too.")
A large part of their redemption arcs is saving their kid from being held hostage and tortured by the Empire (Vader saving Luke from the Emperor & the Death Star // Crosshair helping Omega escape Tantiss both times)
While a much larger battle impacting the fate of the galaxy rages on nearby, both characters' final on-screen act -- the climax of their respective stories -- is saving their kid from one of the Empire's worst villains (Vader saving Luke from the Emperor // Crosshair saving Omega from Hemlock)
Both of them ultimately help thwart Palpatine’s plans for immortality/reincarnation(?) by destroying his primary body and his cloning facility on Tantiss, respectively
Their final on-screen reunions with their kids are very personal and emotional. For Vader and Luke, it's the only time they see each other face-to-face. For Crosshair and Omega, it's the first time they ever hug on-screen.
Their last lines of on-screen dialogue are talking about their daughters with another family member (Vader to his son Luke: "Tell your sister you were right" // Crosshair to his brother Hunter: "If I'm off -- I can't risk Omega.")
The final shots of them on-screen are a 'family portrait' type pose with their older brother/father figure and other loved ones, and their kid/s are nearby
(This list is subject to edits/additions if I think of anything else! If you have any ideas, include them in the comments or reblogs. Thanks!)
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booksandabeer · 8 months
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Steve-Centric Stucky Fics: 5 Recs + 1 TBR
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As promised, here is the rec list for Steve/Bucky fics with a focus on Steve-centric stories—all of them not EG-compliant, as requested. It's not quite as long as my usual rec lists for two reasons:
(1) I'm still sick and I can barely sit up straight, so please forgive the brevity of the list, and
(2) I deliberately wanted to include exclusively fics that were written in 2022 and 2023 to shine a spotlight on a few of the many wonderful writers and artists who are still creating absolutely fantastic works for the Stucky ship and who deserve to be read just as widely and passionately as older works in the fandom. Recency bias, but make it positive!
So without further ado, here are five Steve-centric Stucky recs and one more fic that I can't wait to get to:
1. say it soft and it's almost like praying by Somanywords | 41K, M
Author's summary: Natasha says, “Look, whatever the truth is about you, we have no way of really knowing the Winter Soldier's intentions. He’s not all there, he’s not who you remember. He’s a hot mess, Steve.”
“Why does everyone think that?” Steve says, and he’s nearly yelling, but not quite, because he doesn’t need to, not when they’re so close. “Why does everyone keep saying he’s a mess—have you seen me?" 
Post-CA:TWS canon divergent. I literally finished this fic about 15 minutes ago, so I haven't even left a comment yet. I'm still processing, you could say. The author tagged this with "just another post catws fic (but by me)"—and yes, that's what you get. All the usual ingredients are here, but the joy of TWS canon divergence is of course in the endless possibilities of how these well-known ingredients are used, re-arranged, and re-imagined as something new, exciting, and often much more satisfying than in canon. This fic excels at all three and is an absolute joy from start to finish.
2. Daybreak by BonkyBornes, art by PottersPink | 9K, NR
Author's summary: They called it project Rebirth because the person was supposed to be reborn, like a phoenix from the ashes. Steve was supposed to be the phoenix. He was supposed to rise from the ashes of his old body, he was supposed to leave behind his deafness and his limp and the scoliosis that bent his entire body to the left. He was supposed to leave behind everything that held him back.
In the end, the only thing that left was the only thing that mattered.
Shrinkyclinks canon-divergent AU. What if Project Rebirth didn't go right...but it didn't go entirely wrong either? A story about ghosts but not a ghost story. Or maybe something else entirely? Steve fights his body and time and the memories that keep haunting him. Beautifully written, with gorgeous art by PottersPink that perfectly complements the story.
3. Exhale by seapigeon, art by dudewhereismypie | 15K, M
Author's summary: After the Chitauri invasion, Steve parts ways with SHIELD, unsure if he can trust an agency that tried to deceive him and built weapons from the Tesseract.
He finds himself alone in an unfamiliar future, penniless, not even legally alive. Fortunately, he knows how to survive. Steve Rogers is used to getting by on his own.
The thing is, he doesn't have to.
Shrunkyclunks. Post-Avengers canon divergent. A fic that asks the question: What if, after the battle of New York, Steve had told SHIELD a polite but firm 'No'? Follow him as he strikes out on his own, finds an apartment, a job, and friends, figures out life in the 21st century...and of course falls in love!
4. Preberseeschießen by Ginny_Potter | 6K, T
Author's summary: Bucky breathes out and shoots. The bullet hits water… and there it is, the zapping sound of paper tearing.
The light turns on and off three times. Third circle. Just a lick out of bullseye. The Howlies explode in cheers.
Or, the Howling Commandos play a shooting game with the Austrian Resistance and Steve has lots of unresolved feelings about himself, his new body, and his changing relationship with Bucky. In other words, comrades are comrades, angst looms, and Steve feels.
Wartime fic. Would you like to read some excellent gay angst full of yearning and unresolved tension, peppered with interesting and wonderfully specific historical details and Howlies camaraderie? Would you like to get your heart crushed a little? Yes? Here you go. And if this makes you feel too sad by the end of it and you crave a bit of a happier resolution, just jump straight into a fistfull of dollars (5K, E) by the same author, which is not intended as a companion piece or even set in the same universe, but it works just as if it were. (Look at me sneaking in extra recs.)
5. Not In The Answer But The Question by aimmyarrowshigh, art by PottersPink | 27K, T
Author's summary: It rankles that his drink was made before he even got a chance to order it. What if he wanted a change? What if he were adventurous and bold? What if he tried something new?
---
Or, Steve Rogers shakes up his gray daily routine in 2014 by going back home to Vinegar Hill. To his surprise, the Jewish deli he used to frequent with Arnie is still standing.
And Steve's whole life changes again.
Shrunkyclunks. Post-Avengers canon divergent. A lost and lonely Steve tries to figure out who he was, is and most importantly, wants to be in this new century he's found himself in that is both terrifying and full of possibilities. Told in vignettes (I did not count, but I believe all of them are exactly 100 word drabbles) that perfectly illustrate the fragmented mind and life of its protagonist and his experience of constantly shifting and adjusting between past and present. A story about identity, memory, self-acceptance, and finding the courage to love and let yourself be loved. And food. So much amazing food!
+ 1 TBR: Operation: Gros Michel by SquadOfCats | 358K, E
Author's summary: “It starts with bananas. Of course, it's not really about the bananas. Just like a camel isn't bothered by one single straw, just like a dam doesn't break because of one extra drop. Obviously, Steve's mental breakdown isn't about bananas.”
Steve is overwhelmed and hanging by a thread, doing his best to take care of Bucky while still deeply traumatized himself. He finally has a breakdown over the stupidest of things: bananas. So Bucky takes care of him.
In which Steve learns to surf, Bucky becomes a gardener, and they both begin to heal.
Post-CA:TWS canon divergent. No, I did not make a mistake, the word count for this story really does come in at an impressive (or intimidating, you decide) 358,225 words! Which is the only reason why I haven't read it yet. I do want to make time for this asap because the snippets I've read so far were very intriguing and everything I've heard about it from people who have finished it, sounds absolutely amazing. So, this is the wild card pick!
Happy reading! <3
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uh. nothing is neurotypical about this post <3
[Word Count, for everyone's reference because we all know my habits - 1,526]
The framing of Icarus’ shots. The framing of all of the shots but we're starting at the beginning and *mmmm* the framing of Icarus’. Them being front and center, the light being purple, their wings being out and *big*, their desk being behind them, *their scars.* The way you can *see* Icarus’ lightning scars but it is so much harder to notice with all of their things (makes sense why no one really noticed them.) Just the entire way they act during their segments. *mmmm*
Icarus having the lines about having friends on the other side makes me go bonkers - because they *do.* the whole bit is at the end of Fable, they had Midas on their side - they had *the person in the Worldport*, the person *on the other side*, on *their* side.
Midas having “I find delight in the gruesome and grim” like. Something about how despite the fact they're decaying and their realm is falling apart and their family is dead - they can still find time to mess with Icarus and fuck around and have *hope* that Icarus will make the right choice and. *mmmm.*
Cedar having the line about putting a spell on [someone] makes me giggle - potion lad makes potions and *literally* puts spells and things on people. (Also Cedar's freckles??? I love them??? I hold them so gently??? They look so pretty in this shot, I love this so much-)
Caine having the “be prepared” line is so. Mans fights *so much* and does so many things that involve fighting - it almost feels like a taunt? you know, telling their opponent to be prepared for [the future] or something. (This does immediately follow Icarus saying how he can read [someones] future.)
Sherwood has the line about “trusting [them]” they're a pirate lad and they cause *trouble* and well, if you've just arrived somewhere or you're trying to convince someone - only makes sense you'd ask them to trust you.
Ripley has the poor unfortunate souls line and rah rah rah - they are a ghost and they're silly and I love them and. They are a soul <3
Helix's part is wonderful - because like. something about just how the game of among us works and how you *should be* scared and worried and on your toes - also importer Helix <3
Ajax Ajax Ajax Ajax - look at them and their silly area and *mmmm.* Their *introduction* being “beware take care he rides alone” hurts me personally because that's what Ajax has always intended to do; ride alone. They planned not to make attachments - but they still *did.* And then the lines they speak being "this vampire bat, this inhuman beast, he ought to be locked up and never released" is so. Something about hurting people over and over and over again throughout the events and something about becoming someone everyone fears and wants dead and something about the *box,* and the needing to be inside during storms, and being *trapped* underground for a whole season.
Oh Ripley. “He swears to the longest day he's dead.” Yeah cause they are. Blorbo is dead. They are g h o s t. ghost guy. They're dead. They died. Of course they'd swear they're dead-
Ashril ashril ashril - not being normal about any of ashril's parts. “The world was such a wholesome place until..” guys guys we know ashril *did something* and it was a mistake and they had to run and *mmmmm.* It was good, they were living, they had a family and a life, *until they did **that*** and then they didn't anymore and.
Sherbert's “He had a plan to shake things up, and that's the gospel truth” This line is really ambiguous, but the thing that most immediately comes to mind is Sherbert's letter they write to Icarus, and leave in the stream room. Trying to stop Ic and get them back on the right path. (Also can i just say Sherbert looks so pretty in this shot??? Like they look pretty in all the shots really but the outside shots *especially*)
Reo having the lines about hellfire and their being fire in them - fighting boy goes and does fighting things and is okay with it and likes doing it and. Something about adrenaline or something.
Rina. oh the lyrics on Rina's part. "Yes it is he, but not as you know him. Read my lips, and come to grips with reality” while their eye is bleeding *and* while they're gesturing at the computer - which, might I add, has Icarus on it (doing the other parts of the song), and while they are wearing the same hoodie as Reo. Something about how once their eye started bleeding they had to come to terms with the idea that oh shit, all of this is *real* - This thing that *I made* is so very real. And, I guess if you really wanted to look at the first part of that - the idea that the first time their eye was bleeding was because Icarus was there. “Him” being Icarus, but obviously he wasn't in their body, he was in Rina's and. Yeah. Very normal about this part. (Also the way its framed???? Guys it's such a pretty shot??? And the way they spin the goggles???? Biting it nothing on it eating it whole /pos)
Icarus having the lines about changing, and how they're doing it??? Sobbing. Something about how Icarus is always changing and always going through something and it's never been completely *them* and-
Krit krit - they're just a little lad <3 They have the crab from Moana's part and I hold that so gently. I don't have thoughts about Krit's part they're just happy and they are crab and them <333 guys I love krit so much I cry about them so often /pos
Cedar has love is an open door and I. They are in love with the herb lady. They love Azalea. They have a *very big* crush on her - and they also have no rizz - I love them for that <3
Guys it's Ashril again. Guys it's ashril again and I'm trying so hard to be normal but oh my gosh Ashril having the line “But they guzzle up the things you prize” is so. Guys Ashril is running from something and it's not pretty and they've been *hurt* before (gestures at the scar that I think so much about often)
Icarixis having “I hope you're satisfied” guys *Icarixis having I hope you're satisfied.* Because this is what they've worked for for months and years - to be able to fix everything and to be able to make it all work out in the end and. *mmmm* “But if you ain't, don't blame me.” Something about how they'd blame Midas - the Quixis before them, or something.
Okay three people have the “Don't forget it” line - in order being Sherbert, Ripley, Ashril. Something about how all three of them have something they so desperately want to remember. Sherbert in a time where they could die freely and weren't confined to a world. Ripley of a time when they were alive. And Ashril of, well, their brother.
And then Helix gets the “You'll regret it” because imposter and murder and Among Us things - they're simply just a guy /pos
the next few lines are all them commenting on the land and things - which feel pretty self explanatory. I will say oh my gosh the Reo cosplay gives me so much gender envy and for what. Sherbert you look so ahhhhh /pos
Caine having “As a specimen yes I'm intimidating” because of course they do - they're a fighter boy who got strength but also they have Asshole Rizz[™] hence the specimen comment, or something. Caine is simply silly goofy-
Sherbert's part Sherbert's part *Sherbert's part* - “You got what you wanted - but you lost what you had!” Cen refer to both Icarus and Sherbert; but Sherbert *specifically* for the moment. Just - they got want they wanted, Sherb. Their world was back to normal and no longer decaying and sure they had to fix the wack but it's not longer spreading - but also they can't immediately go back to what they had. They can't go back to the infinite dying - they lost that. They may have gotten what they wanted with Icarus, Quixis - but they still lost *so much.* And then Icarus shush-ing them??? silly guys doing silly things-
(And the Icarus idea of this line, if you see it as Sherb telling it to Ic, or whatever else you can see it as - they got what they wanted, being able to fix it all and make up for everything they did; but they lost their family and their life and *themself* in the process. They can't get it back.)
Yeah, anyway. There's you CMV thoughts - definitely just a love letter to my love of all the sherbs and sherbs cmvs and their editing and *everything.* I love this cmv so much and I have very many thoughts and oh my gosh a couple of those frames my artist brain *really* wants to draw because they're so pretty-
Sherbert if you're reading this, you're really cool <3
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You Are In Love (Superstar Chapter 10)
You kiss on sidewalks
You fight and you talk
One night he wakes
Strange look on his face
Pauses, then says
You're my best friend
And you knew what it was
He is in love
Roy and the Reader settle into their life together.
Roy Kent x Reader
9.7k words
Warnings: Language, allusions to smutty things, adults drinking, teeny tiny talk about insecurities, some of the most self-indulgent and fluffy writing I have ever done in my entire life
Author's note: I'm feeling really emotional about posting this final chapter, and I just really want to say THANK YOU. This story really helped get me out of a writing slump, and your love & support has been a huge part of that. I've loved spending so much time with these characters, but more than that, I loved getting to share this story with you. From the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU. I hope you enjoy all this sugary sweet fluff!
~
Roy stared at me in utter disgust, as if I had just told him I was becoming a Man City supporter or hated The Sound of Music. “That is the fucking worst combination of words in the history of the fucking world.”
I rolled my eyes at his dramatics. “Brunch with Keeley and Jamie is not torture, Roy.”
“To me it is,” he growled, pulling back the blankets and crawling into bed.
“Come on. It’ll be fun. Keeley’s one of my closest girlfriends, and Jamie’s your best friend,” I pointed out as I followed suit, pulling the blankets over us.
Roy let out a deep groan. “Why the fuck does everyone keep fucking saying that?” He turned to face me, propping himself up on his elbow. “I want to really, actually, literally murder him. I fantasize about it almost as much as I fantasize about you. How the fuck is that friendship?”
I shrugged and kissed the tip of his nose. “Everyone has their own love language. And violence towards Jamie Tartt is yours.”
“Want to know my love language when it comes to you?” he asked suggestively, his hand snaking its way under the t-shirt I wore. “I’m fucking fluent.”
“I’d prefer if your love language was going to brunch,” I teased, giving him a playful shove.
He grunted, annoyed at my lack of response to his flirting. “Fine. But I’m drinking as many fucking mimosas as I want.”
The next morning, Roy begrudgingly sat at a patio table across from Jamie, listening to Keeley and I gossip and giggle over mimosas and a ridiculous amount of food. Suddenly, she lit up.
“Oh! Roy, there was something I wanted to run by you.” She took his grunt as the signal to continue. “So, with the Greyhounds doing so well, there’ve been lots of requests for interviews and stuff, y’know? And there’s this hot new talk show, hosted by…” She took a quick look at her mobile. “Ryley Sharp. Two Ys. And his people reached out to see if they could get a gaffer to come on for a chat.” She shrugged. “Would you be interested?”
Roy narrowed his eyes and downed the mimosa in front of him. “Why me? Doesn’t this seem more Ted’s kind of shit?”
Keeley shifted, shooting Jamie a glance. Jamie nodded encouragingly; he’d clearly heard this whole pitch already. “I could ask Ted, but…” She thought a moment. “I mean, you’re a household name, so it would be very good ratings. And, as a friend, I was thinking it would be a good opportunity for you to…” She trailed off, her eyes flickering to me.
“For me to do what exactly?” Curiosity floated behind his stony expression.
“To control your own narrative,” Keeley finally said. When she saw the confusion on both our faces, she continued. “Listen, I know you hate the media-”
“I wish they’d all die in a fiery explosion and then have all their ashes fed to feral hogs who eat their own shit so there’s just an endless cycle of their ashes being eaten and shit out for all eternity,” Roy confirmed.
Keeley nodded slowly, glancing at me as if to ask ‘This is your boyfriend?’ “Right. But think about it this way. You’re a very public figure, Roy. And now that the two of you are done pretending you’re capable of hiding your relationship, you’re going to be going out in public together. And you are going to be photographed together. And your name-” She turned to me. “-is going to become known as well. And I assume none of us want a repeat of… you know what.”
A snort flew out of Jamie’s nose. “Boy-toy Roy,” he cheeked.
Roy bared his teeth. “I have my taxidermist on speed-dial.”
“Boys,” I scolded. “Keeley, please continue.”
“Thank you,” she hummed. “Now, Roy, if you go on this show, you’ll talk about Richmond of course. All about how well they’re doing, how great Ted is, how you see yourself in the lads, that sort of thing. And then, Ryley’ll ask you about yourself. Particularly…” She gestured towards me. “This way you get to decide what people know about you. No room for speculation from the press, no room for making shit up to sell a magazine. Just ‘I’m Roy Kent, I’m in a very happy relationship with the world’s fittest woman, and we have an adorable dog’.” She offered up a hopeful smile. “What d’you think?”
All three of us looked at Roy expectantly. He shoved a piece of fruit into his mouth, then reached over and grabbed my mimosa and gulped it down.
“Tell me about this Ryley Sharp prick,” he finally muttered, taking my hand under the table.
Keeley perked up and gestured to a passing waiter to bring more drinks. “He’s not too bad actually. I’ve watched his show before. Bit of an airhead, but very sweet. And I’ve asked around to see what people have to say about him. Not a bad word from anyone. He’s absolutely not the gotcha kind of guy. He’ll ask you lots of easy, soft questions, make you look good, give you the opportunity to gush about this one here-” She winked at me. “-and he won’t go into anything you don’t want to go into.”
Roy grunted, tapping the table. He glanced at me. “What d’you think?” he asked earnestly.
I looked back at him. His eyes were unsure, eyebrows all scrunched. He’ll do whatever I ask, I realized. He wanted to make me happy, to help me feel safe and secure. And fuck, I wanted to do the same for him.
“I think,” I started carefully. “I think you should do what you want. Keeley makes some really good points about getting out in front of things and not giving the media room to speculate, but if it’s going to kill you, don’t do it.” I squeezed his hand. “I’ll support whatever you decide.”
“Hmmf.” He looked my face over, thoughtfulness in his expression. “Fuck it.” He looked at Keeley. “I’ll do it, but I’m not saying nice things about that prat.” He nodded at Jamie.
Keeley squealed, ignoring the outraged look on her boyfriend’s pretty face. “Ahh! Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She grabbed her phone and began typing rapidly. “I’ll pop by tomorrow with all the details. And a backstage pass for you,” she added, winking at me. “And don’t you worry, Roy, I’ll be there the whole time to make sure it goes well, I promise.”
He nodded curtly. “Yeah, well.” He cleared his throat. “I can still swear and shit, yeah?”
~
I smiled watching Roy through the mirror as the makeup woman attempted to powder his face. He was wearing his signature scowl, along with a charcoal suit that hugged him beautifully. At Keeley’s insistence and my prodding, he had gotten a haircut and tidied his beard. All in all, he managed to look even better than he did on any of my old posters.
I really get to go home with this man, I thought with a giggle as I nestled further into the couch I shared with Keeley in the greenroom. Noticing the giddy way I was watching him, he met my eyes in the mirror and cracked a smile.
“No, you’re not putting makeup on me when we get home,” he warned.
“Spoilsport,” I teased as the door opened and a production assistant entered to let Roy know that he would be on after the commercial break, which meant it was time for all of us to leave the greenroom.
Keeley linked her arm through mine as another assistant led us to a pair of audience seats that had been reserved for us to watch the interview. “I made sure they told Roy exactly where we’re sitting,” Keeley assured me as we settled in.
Sure enough, as soon as Roy walked out onto the set to thunderous applause, his gaze found mine. I wondered if the viewers at home would also notice the tiny twitch of his mouth when our eyes locked. He plopped down into the stylish chair by Ryley Sharp’s desk.
We had gotten to meet Ryley Sharp before the show, and Keeley had been right about him; sweet and a bit of an airhead, in the best possible way. He was very excited to have Roy on the show and was thrilled to know I’d be sitting out in the audience with Keeley. He was completely onboard with everything Keeley had discussed with us and thought that Roy wanting to chat about me during the interview was simply “adorable”.
Keeley gripped my hand as Roy was interviewed. I was hugely impressed; he was almost charming and nearly friendly, he actually answered questions, and he even managed to keep his “fucks” to a minimum. It was the best interview I’d ever seen him do, and I’d probably watched every single one he’d done in his entire career. Multiple times.
My cheeks hurt from smiling so much as I listened to the audience laugh at some cheeky comment he made about Ted.
Ryley Sharp shifted in his seat, running a hand through his bleached hair. “Alright, so it looks like things are going well for you, Roy. Happily retired from a massively successful career, coaching Richmond to one of the great underdog stories of our time. What about in your personal life?” He raised his eyebrows. “Got a girl?”
Roy shifted in his seat, clearing his throat. “I actually do,” he admitted, his eyes flicking in my direction as the studio audience ooohed.
“Roy Kent, are you squirming?” Ryley Sharp humorously gasped, leaning forward.
“Do I have to answer that?” Roy asked, a teasing edge in his voice.
Ryley Sharp shook his head. “Not if you agree to tell us about this girl of yours..”
Roy nodded. “Sounds like a deal to me.” He gave a small cough. “She’s, uh, she’s amazing, yeah. We work at Richmond together and, I dunno, we clicked. Decided to give it a go, and so far, so good.”
“Descriptive as always,” Ryley Sharp teased, eliciting some light chuckles from the audience. “Mind if we do some lightning-round questions to learn more?”
Roy nodded firmly. “Fuck it, let’s do it.”
Ryley Sharp cleared his throat. “She like football?”
“Loves it.”
“Fan of yours?”
A smirk graced Roy’s face. “Huge.”
“Her parents like you?”
“I like to think so.”
“She smart?”
“Brilliant.”
“Funny?”
Roy bobbled his head. “She thinks she is.”  He winked in my direction as the audience chuckled.
Ryley Sharp’s friendly smile widened. “She pretty?”
“Fucking gorgeous.”
“And am I to understand…” Ryley Sharp perked up a little. “She’s here in our studio audience?”
Sharp had come up with this idea, explaining that the audience would find it charming as hell. Keeley had left it completely up to us whether we wanted to go along with it, and I’d left it up to Roy, who surprised us all with his yes. My heart skipped a beat when I saw Roy sit up straight and turn his gaze back to me.
“Um, yeah, yeah she’s here.” He gave a little nod in my direction. “Sitting right over there with our friend Keeley.”
Sharp waved to someone off-stage. “Could we get a mic out there?” he called.
In an instant, the same production assistant from earlier was standing next to my seat, holding a microphone. Roy gave me a thumbs up as Ryley Sharp turned his attention to me.
“Why don’t you stand up, love?” he asked as the house lights came on and a camera turned my way.
Keeley pushed me to my feet as my face burned. I smiled and gave Roy a little wave as the production assistant handed me the mic. “Hi,” I said timidly, suddenly hating the sound of my own voice.
Roy smiled, a full smile, and nodded back. “Hey,” he called tenderly. Even from my seat, I could see his eyes were full of affection.
Ryley Sharp cleared his throat playfully. “Alright, lovebirds, back to the interview.” He focused on me. “So, Roy Kent’s girl, eh?” I nodded, suddenly bashful. “What’s it like dating this guy, hmm?”
I lifted the microphone to my face. “Lovely, actually. He’s a pretty good one.” The wink Roy sent me bolstered my confidence.
“Alright, I’m sure all the hardcore football fans out there are dying to know.” Sharp looked at me with mock seriousness. “What is the most romantic thing Roy Kent has ever done?”
My eyes drifted from Ryley to Roy who raised his eyebrows at me. He spoke up. “It’s Paris, innit?”
I nodded, biting back a grin. “Can I tell them about it?”
Roy sat back in his seat and shrugged, as if it were totally normal for us to have a conversation on national television. “Why the fuck not?”
I turned my attention back to Sharp. “Um, well Richmond had gone to Paris for a friendly. And after the match, Roy here surprised me by taking me to the Louvre.” More ooohs from the audience. “After hours,” I added cheekily, garnering more hooting. “And we had a lovely time. Dinner and champagne, the kind of thing only a retired footballer can afford to do.”
Sharp joined in the audience’s chuckles. “Goodness. If that’s a date, I can’t wait to see what his proposal’ll look like!”
My cheeks burned, but I tried to maintain my composure. “Yeah, well, you and my mother have something in common then,” I joked, earning a laugh from the whole room- most especially Roy, who was shaking his head and looking at me like I was the most wonderful, special thing he’d ever seen in his life.
Ryley Sharp asked me a couple more questions- about Oscar and about what Roy and I liked to do when we weren’t at work- before wrapping it up. “Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up for Roy Kent and his lovely girlfriend!”
As the audience gave a hearty round of applause, I handed the microphone back to the assistant and looked at Roy, who was still staring at me. I blew him a kiss, and he looked down, clearly blushing. He turned back to Sharp, shaking his hand and looking uncharacteristically cheerful.
After the show wrapped, Keeley and I made our way back to the greenroom, where Roy was chatting with Ryley Sharp. He offered me a smirk when he saw me and placed a kiss on my forehead.
“You were fucking brilliant,” he murmured in my ear.
Ryley Sharp reached out and shook my hand. “How’d it feel?”
I cleared my throat. “It was fun,” I admitted. “But not something I could do every day. Don’t know how you all live with being famous.”
Keeley giggled and nudged me. “Oh, so you don’t want me to set you up with a modeling contract then?”
“Hell no,” I laughed. “Being Roy Kent’s girl is more than enough attention for me.”
~
Life became predictable. Easy. Routine. And I loved every moment of it.
We’d spend our days at Nelson Road, with Roy in training and me doing my best to bring some semblance of order to the coaching staff, eating lunch together almost every day. Our evenings were often spent with Phoebe and Oscar, making dinner together, playing, and watching movies until Roy’s sister came for pickup. Nearly every night was spent together, either at his place or mine, and our mornings were spent waking up in each other’s arms. On weekends we were with the Greyhounds, or taking Phoebe on outings, or meeting up with friends, or just sitting on the couch and reading.
From time to time our picture would end up online or in a magazine: playing at the park with Oscar, or sharing an embrace after a Richmond victory, or getting drinks with Keeley and Jamie. More often than not, the picture featured a blurred gesture on Roy’s part, but he could always be counted on to point out how stunning he thought I looked in the photos.
Amidst this domestic bliss- or “the boring life of dating an old geezer”, as Roy called it- was one thrilling constant: Richmond was still winning. They’d bounced around the top four spots over the course of the season, but there was actual expectation for them. More than one pundit even selected them as their pick to win the “whole enchilada”, as Ted and Dani loved to say in unison. Things came down, in true dramatic fashion, to the last match of the season, which would be against Arsenal.
Roy had already gone running with Jamie and was showered and set to go by the time I woke up, so he sat on the bed with Oscar and read as I got myself ready. He not-so-stealthily watched me over the top of his book as I dug through the half of the closet I was slowly taking up and cleared his throat.
“Wear the sweater,” he mumbled, absently turning the page of his book.
I turned to him. “Hmm?”
He glanced up at me again. “The fucking lucky sweater,” he repeated. “We could use all the fucking help we can get. Wear it.”
“Oh.” I looked at the sweater that was always in his closet. I wore it at home all the time, wore it out for errands occasionally, but had never worn it to a match. It felt a little silly, and I didn’t feel the need to give anyone fodder to tease us with. I turned back to Roy, who had set his book down by now. “Won’t I look a bit funny, wearing your name with you there in the dugout next to me?"
Roy sat up, his face soft. “I mean, people should get used to seeing you wearing my name.” He paused, tilting his head. “Right?”
I felt myself blush. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t thought about marrying Roy someday; I’d been thinking of that pretty much since I hit puberty. And the topic had been one that our friends and colleagues teased about from time to time. And it was something I felt myself wondering about more and more lately.
“Oi.” Roy was grinning at me, clearly amused by my silence. “Don’t worry, I’m not fucking proposing after the match or anything like that.” He stood up and came over to where I was, wrapping his arms around me. “I mean, someday, sure. But not today.” He kissed my forehead. “Alright with you?”
Roy Kent wants to marry me someday. Roy Kent wants to marry me. Roy Kent wants to fucking marry me.
I gave an embarrassed laugh and returned his hug, pretending that he hadn’t just filled my heart with more love than I knew how to carry. “Alright. I’ll wear the fucking sweater then.”
Clad in my dark blue sweater, KENT screaming across the back in white lettering, I stood by the coaches all game long, screaming and cheering louder than usual. Rebecca had been lovely enough to get my family amazing seats, and I swore I could hear my father’s shouts above the rest of the crowd. I tore my eyes away from the gameplay to check the clock, which was fast approaching the 100th minute. By some incredible miracle, we were up 2-1 and just needed the ref to blow the fucking whistle.
As we watched the boys do all they could to keep possession of the ball and push towards Arsenal’s goal, I felt Roy grip my hand tightly and heard him muttering “Come on, fuck, come on,” under his breath non-stop.
Fweet fweet fweeeeeeeeeet!
“Holy fuck!” At the sound of the final whistle, Roy picked me up and spun me around, squeezing me so tight I swore I’d have bruises the next day. Everyone from the dugout raced onto the pitch, where the team was screaming their heads off, jumping on each other like children.
I spent God knows how long on that field, hugging sweaty men and kissing their faces, shouting out expressions of pride over the roar of the fans who were forcing their way onto the pitch. Roy finally pulled me back to himself with urgency, as if he couldn’t bear to be far from me for long.
“Are you fucking crying?” There was a loving edge of teasing in his voice as his thumb swiped across my cheek, which I hadn’t even realized was wet.
I nodded, not caring that I was full grown woman weeping over a football match. “Fuck yeah I am,” I confirmed. “They fucking did it, Roy.”
He shook his head and wiped away more of my tears. “We fucking did it. You’re part of this team. Don’t you ever fucking forget that.” He kissed my forehead, my cheeks, my nose, my chin, every square inch of my face. “I love you,” he mumbled as his mouth finally found mine.
“Love you too,” I managed to huff out between kisses that were slowly becoming heated as the boys began shouting the Richmond chant at the top of their lungs and formed a conga line. “Watch it, or Jamie’s gonna give you another warning about keeping things family-friendly.”
“Fuck it. If they wanna broadcast this, we might as well give ’em something worthwhile.” With that, he dipped me backwards, latching his lips to mine in a way that could only be described as cinematic.
That kiss was as if he’d managed to peer into every girlhood fantasy of mine and decided it wasn’t enough. As if he’d taken every great rom-com kiss and wanted to show them how it was done. I knew my girlfriends were sitting in a pub, cackling with glee about how I had twenty-eight posters of this man in my childhood bedroom and was now snogging him on national television. I knew my parents were in the stands, my mum beaming with joy at seeing me so in love, my dad playfully grumbling and asking if Roy really had to kiss her like that, but unable to help the smile on his own face. I knew we’d have to endure lots of teasing at the team celebration, with the guys egging Roy on to kiss me like that again, and with Roy giving in after having just the right amount of shots that would make him forget to be grumpy. And I knew I’d be thinking about this particular kiss for a very, very long time.
As I touched his face, wondering how long we could get away with this embrace before we crossed over into truly insufferable, my mind drifted back to our conversation that morning, and an obvious realization hit me: I want to kiss Roy Kent for the rest of my life.
~
Rebecca’s email took me off guard. It was a week since the Arsenal match, and Roy was outside putting our suitcases in the car while I double checked the reservations for the weekend holiday we’d planned to celebrate the end of the season. It was supposed to be a simple, easy weekend, full of food and drinks, relaxing, reading, maybe a little sightseeing if I could convince Roy, and no football whatsoever. Just us, a normal couple. But now Rebecca’s email would be looming over my head the whole time.
Roy noticed. Of course he noticed, he noticed everything when it came to me. We had stopped to have lunch and for once, I was quiet. He tilted his head at me as I poked at my food.
“Alright. What the fuck is wrong?”
I looked up at him, the concern in his eyes contrasting with the harsh way he spoke. “Nothin’,” I lied.
He shook his head. “Come off it. I’m not going to spend my first chance to actually relax in months with you not talking to me. You’ve got me too used to all your fucking prattling.” He reached out and took my free hand as his voice softened. “Come on. We’re supposed to tell each other things. Fucking vulnerable, remember?”
Despite myself, I smiled at our favorite word. “I, um, got an email from Rebecca this morning.” I squirmed, not quite looking at Roy.
“Doesn’t she know it’s your fucking break?” he teased, clearly trying to help me relax. “Fuck does she want?”
I set my fork down and took a deep breath before I spoke at hyper speed. “Rebecca wants to make me the Assistant to the Director of Football Operations. Working directly under Higgins. She says they both were very impressed with everything I did this season, and they want to see what I can do with more responsibility. And Higgins wants more time with his family, and he and I get along so well already, and it would be a really great opportunity-”
“I know.”
His suddenness caught me off-guard. “What d’you mean you know?”
He bobbled his head in that nervous manner of his, half-smile playing on his lips. “Rebecca and Higgins came to the gaffers before the Arsenal match and asked what we’d think of the move.”
My stomach fluttered as I stared at him. Fuck, I should have ordered a drink.“And what did you tell her?”
Roy sipped the beer he’d been smart enough to order. “Told her she could fuck right off if she thought she could move you out of our office.” He smirked and shrugged. “And that you completely fucking deserve it.” He leaned forward earnestly. “You’re too fucking good to stay down there with us, babe. You should be running the whole fucking club, not just bossing around me and Ted and Beard. You are going to be amazing. I’ll fucking manage to figure out how to get to interviews and press conferences on time, I promise.”
Tears I didn’t realize had formed threatened to fall when I saw the excitement and pride glowing on his face. “Just put a fucking reminder on your phone, you idiot,” I managed to choke out.
“See, it’s that loving, patient guidance I’m going to miss when you’re upstairs plotting your hostile takeover of the football world.” Roy lifted my hand to his lips and pressed a soft kiss to my knuckles. “Almost as much as I’ll miss seeing your gorgeous face every time I walk into our office.” He squeezed my hand. “Take the fucking job.”
“It’s a pretty great job,” I murmured, gazing at our hands. “And I mean, who knows, maybe someday I could have Higgins’s post.”
Roy’s smile widened when he saw me seriously considering the position. “Ruthless woman. I’ll let Higgins know you’re coming for his job.”
He earned a laugh from me. “We’ll see how I like being his assistant first,” I assured Roy. I squeezed his hand, thinking. “I’m just really going to miss sharing an office with you, y’know?”
He shrugged. “Guess we gotta figure out a way to make up for all that lost time.” He paused, taking a sip of his beer as his eyes suddenly became shifty. “Say, what do you think of that flat of yours?”
I almost choked on the sudden shift in the conversation. “My flat? It’s fine. I like it well enough.”
Roy’s face became serious. “But d’you really like it? Because I’d be willing to move in, but fucking Oscar’s spoiled and likes having a yard. I really think he’d prefer it if you moved in with us.” He licked his lips anxiously. “I’d fucking like it too.”
Roy wants to live together. Roy wants to live together. Roy wants to live together. “You want me to move in with you?” I squeaked, wondering, as I often did, when I would wake up from the dream I was living in.
“You already have your own key. You’re there even more than your own flat. Half your shit is already in my closet. I fucking hate it when you’re not there. Besides, you can’t fucking cook, so I’d like to make sure you’re well-fed.” He shrugged. “D’you want to?”
He was doing that thing. That thing where he acted like something was insignificant and casual, like it didn’t matter too much, when underneath he was a ball of nerves, anxiously waiting for an answer. It was a defense mechanism, for sure. A way to make sure people knew that whatever they said didn’t matter to Roy, even though I knew that what I said mattered to him very much. It was, in my opinion, one of the most adorable and attractive things he did.
I didn’t make him sit in that nervousness for long. “Yeah. Yes. Definitely.” My smile was probably the dopiest, silliest one I’d ever worn. “I’d love to.”
“You sure? You don’t seem too thrilled.” Roy grinned and leaned back in his seat, staring at me for a moment. “Look at you. Kickass new job, moving in with your dishy boyfriend. Your life fucking rocks.”
“I’m sorry, did you just call yourself dishy?” I snorted.
He cleared his throat, cheeks tinted pink. “Fucking saw someone call me that on Twitter the other day. Figured my girlfriend would agree.”
I shook my head and laughed. “God, what’re you going to do without me in the office telling you when you sound like an absolute wanker?”
~
The off-season involved a lot of moving on my part. First, I had to pack up my entire flat and move everything into Roy’s house; luckily, Roy was right when he said that half of my things were already at his place. He’d managed to wrangle the players who weren’t away on holiday to help us move all the boxes one afternoon, rewarding them with pizza and beer, which somehow evolved into a karaoke party in Roy’s- our­- living room, with Oscar jumping from person to person, just waiting for someone to drop a slice of pizza.
It was well past midnight by the time everyone left; I assumed Roy would want to go straight to sleep after the exhausting day we’d had. Instead, he dragged me into the kitchen once I’d changed into an old Sunderland shirt of his.
“Didn’t you have enough pizza already?” I asked, stifling a yawn. “’m ready for bed.”
“Just have one thing to do first,” he mumbled, rummaging through the fridge. “Grab a couple of glasses from the bar, yeah?”
Rolling my eyes, I did as I was told, picking up a pair of wine glasses that Keeley had gifted us in honor of the move. When I brought them back to Roy, I stopped in my tracks.
On the counter was a chilled bottle of champagne and a tiny cake, just perfect for two. Roy leaned on the counter, eyeing me carefully, a smirk playing on his lips.
“What’s all this then?” I breathed, blinking from either the tiredness or the surprise. Maybe both.
Roy shrugged, picking up the bottle. “Fucking celebrating of course.” He opened the bottle with ease, but not without champagne starting to flow out. “Shit, bring me the glasses,” he laughed, trying to avoid spilling everywhere.
The kitchen filled with sleepy giggles as we managed to get most of the champagne into the glasses rather than on the countertop. Once we’d finally gotten our glasses filled properly, I sat in my usual spot, with Roy opting to stand next to me, gazing at me softly. He held up his glass.
“Welcome home,” he murmured, tapping his glass to mine with a small clink.
My cheeks warmed as I sipped my champagne, staring at Roy as he did the same. Maybe it was the late hour and my tiredness, but it didn’t feel real, moving in with Roy. And it wasn’t even because it was Roy freaking Kent; rather, it was because I found it hard to believe anyone was capable of feeling the intense love that burned in my chest as Roy handed me a fork and slid the little cake towards me.
We ate and drank in a comfortable silence, the only sounds being the clinking of forks against the plate and Oscar pattering around and our soft chuckles every time our eyes met. After Roy put everything in the sink, mumbling something about taking care of the dishes in the morning, he turned to me, sleepy smile on his face.
“Oi, you brought the blanket, right?”
I had this one particular blanket that had always laid on my couch in my flat. My gran had made it, and it was, without a doubt, the warmest, comfiest blanket in the universe. Roy had gotten in the habit of stealing it from the first time he’d come over to watch The Sound of Music and often brought it to bed when he spent the night. Honestly, there was a very real chance he asked me to move in just so he could have the blanket at his house.
“Um, yeah, it’s one of these boxes somewhere…” I ran my fingers through my hair, eyeing the ridiculous number of cardboard boxes that now decorated Roy’s- our­- house.
Before I could suggest he waited until the morning to look for it, he had already walked over to one of the boxes and started digging. Since he clearly was not going to bed until he found it, I figured I might as well do the dishes. I was rinsing the glasses we’d drank champagne out of when I heard-
“What the absolute fuck is this?”
When I turned around, there were two Roy Kents in the doorway. One was my boyfriend, shirtless and ready for bed, eyebrows raised higher than I’d ever seen them, his mouth wide open in amusement, laughter bursting out of him. The other was cardboard, clad in his Richmond uniform and wearing a scowl.
“Oh fuck!” I nearly dropped the glass I was holding. “You weren’t- that box was supposed to go to my mum’s- shit!” I was choking on embarrassment as my face turned redder than a tomato.
In all the years I’d spent watching him on television and the countless hours I’d now spent in his presence, I had never heard Roy Kent laugh so damn much. He was doubled over with laughter, wiping away tears and making so much noise he woke up Oscar.
I turned off the sink and stormed over, folding the cardboard cutout back up and tossing it on top of the box it had come out of. With a huff, I turned to Roy, who was finally starting to breathe again.
“It was a gag gift from my dad for my birthday a few years ago,” I mumbled, not looking at his smug face. “Kept it because my mates and I thought it was funny to bring out when we watched matches at my place. I was going to take it to my mum’s, figured one of these days I’d sort through all my… football things and throw some stuff out and decide what to do with the rest.”
Seeing the humiliation on my face, Roy sobered up and grabbed my shoulders. “C’mere,” he chuckled, tugging me close to himself. “Please tell me you were not going to throw that thing away.”
I shrugged, still avoiding his gaze. “Probably. I dunno. Wasn’t planning on deciding that right now.”
“Hey.” He lifted my chin, forcing me to look at the tenderness in his eyes. “Don’t you dare be fucking embarrassed.” He tilted his head when I let out a little hmmf. “Did I… did I ever apologize for bringing up your posters that night?”
We both knew what he was referring to.
“Dunno,” I muttered, knowing full well that the answer was no. We’d never brought up that particular comment.
“Oh.” Roy’s hands slid off my shoulders and he grabbed my hand, leading me to the couch. We sat, and he kept my hand in his. “I’m sorry. I… I never want you to feel embarrassed about having a fucking crush on me, alright?”
I shrugged, glancing away. “It’s… it’s silly. All those posters and the sweater and now the freaking cardboard cutout. It just reminds me what a crazed stalker fan I was before we met. Makes me feel a bit embarrassed.”
He smiled and shifted closer. “It might be a little silly,” he agreed. “But it’s also fucking flattering.” He brushed some hair out of my face. “Y’know, when I first saw all that stuff in your room, I thought my heart was going to fucking stop. Because there you were, my stunning new officemate, with my stupid fucking face on your walls. Even the really bad pictures.” He shrugged, suddenly bashful. “Made me realize I had a real fucking shot with you.” He gestured towards the folded-up cutout. “So, I know when you see that shit, you feel embarrassed and all, but when I see it, I remember how fucking excited I got when I realized that you were at least attracted to me. And how seeing you get all flustered, just like you are right now-” He poked my nose affectionately. “-gave me the guts to kiss you.”
To punctuate his point, he leaned over and gently pressed his lips to mine, reminding me of that moment in my bedroom, where he sat on my bed and asked if he was still hot and kissed me for the first time. It felt just as surreal now as it did then, and I asked whatever god was out there to not let me wake up from this dream.
When Roy pulled back, he wore that same fucking smile, the one I didn’t think I’d ever get used to seeing. “Right. Help me find the fucking blanket so we can get some sleep, hmm?” Holding my hand, he helped me to my feet, and the two of us set to work, looking for the blanket so we could finally go to our bed.
~
Working for Higgins was an easy adjustment. I loved my new office upstairs; I had put up photos of Roy, both of my little orange sticky notes, a couple drawings from Phoebe, pictures with Keeley and Rebecca, Oscar, the team, my family, Roy’s family. The handmade card that Ted, Beard, Roy, and the whole team had signed to congratulate me on the promotion sat on my desk, alongside a framed photo of Roy kissing me after the final game against Arsenal, courtesy of Keeley, who’d found it in a tabloid.
I loved having my office right next to Higgins, who liked to pop in for a chat in the late mornings, and brought in treats that his wife made for us to share, and tapped out a beat on our shared wall when I played my music loud enough for him to hear. He listened excitedly to my ideas and suggestions, and he quickly stopped referring to me as “Assistant to the Director of Football Operations” and began calling me “Assistant Director of Football Operations”; it was a change everyone at the Dog Track was quick to adopt.
But I had to admit, my favorite thing about my new office was the window by my desk. As much as I missed my office that I had shared with Roy, this office had one great advantage: the view. My window overlooked the pitch, where I could watch training. Meaning, I could watch Roy. When my window was cracked open, the way it always happened to be when the team was on the pitch, I could hear him screaming “Whistle!” and swearing at Jamie. Sometimes I’d just stand by the window and watch for a bit; that always managed to catch his eye, and I was always rewarded with a smirk and a wave from Roy, sometimes some teasing whistles from the team or a cheerful “Howdy!” from Ted.
After a bit more than a full season working upstairs, I found myself skipping from Higgins’s office to mine. We’d been pursuing a great young player out of Mexico, someone Dani had brought to our attention, and we’d finally signed him. And, despite my insistence that this was a team effort, I had been instrumental in making it happen. So, Keeley and Rebecca decided to take me out to a celebratory lunch, one that Rebecca informed me would take the rest of the afternoon and also required me to dress nice. Accordingly, I had worn heels and a springy little dress that had made Roy’s jaw drop with a soft “Whoa” that morning as we got ready for work. Seeing that man check me out still managed to make my heart flutter with delight.
After popping into Higgins’s office to let him know I was heading out, I went back to mine to open the window and shout down a quick goodbye to Roy. Instead, I found an empty pitch. Weird.
I figured they must have gone into the weight room or something, just a spontaneous change of plans. Par for the course with Ted in charge. So, I made my way downstairs, thinking I’d pop into Roy’s office to see if I could get a proper goodbye.
The changing room was eerily quiet, as was Ted and Beard’s office. I poked my head into Roy’s office, which I hated to admit looked empty since I’d moved upstairs. It was especially empty without Roy. With a small hmmf, I paused to glance over his desk, smiling when I glimpsed the picture of us that sat on his desk, a selfie in front of the Mona Lisa that he’d grumbled good-naturedly about.
“That’s a great picture of us.”
Roy stood in the doorway, kebab takeaway container in hand. He smiled and walked over to me, placing the Styrofoam box on his desk. He kissed my forehead sweetly and let his eyes trail over my face.
“Just wanted to say bye before I head to lunch,” I explained, giving his leather jacket a friendly tug. “You look nice, by the way. Interview today?”
He shrugged. “Just didn’t want to be in fucking workout clothes all day,” he mumbled. He nodded towards the takeaway box. “Got you somethin’.”
I frowned. “Kebabs? Roy, I told you I’ve got lunch plans with Keeley and Rebecca.”
“Open the box.”
I rolled my eyes. “Seriously, Roy, I’m gonna be late. Can’t you just toss these in the fridge, and I’ll eat them tonight? Or you can eat them. Or-”
“Just open the fucking box,” Roy said with a laugh, eyebrows raised. “Shit, you really never fucking shut up.”
Narrowing my eyes, I picked up the surprisingly light container. I glanced back at Roy, who nodded at me, encouraging me to open it. With a sigh I opened the lid. Instead of finding our usual lunch, there was a small, velvet box inside and a little orange sticky note that simply read:
To my future wife
XOXO Roy
I snapped my head up to look at Roy, whose smile had grown. Hands shaking slightly, I picked up the black box, letting the Styrofoam container plop back onto Roy’s desk. When I opened the little box, I gasped.
Inside was a diamond ring. It was simple, a small diamond, the exact kind I’d described to Keeley and Rebecca at our sleepover so long ago. I looked back up at Roy, whose eyes had that old anxiety swimming in them, alongside affection and tenderness.
“I’d get down on one knee, but, y’know,” he mumbled, offering up a bashful smile. He cleared his throat. “If I could go back to the first time I bought you kebabs for lunch, I’d have done this. Because every minute of not being married to you is a big fucking waste of time.”
My breath caught in my throat as I blinked back tears. “Roy,” I gasped, my eyes shifting back to the beautiful ring.
He reached over and took the ring out of the box and held it up to me. “What d’you say?” His voice was soft, tender, full of adoration to an extent I’d never heard. “Please say yes.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at the familiar phrase. “Yes.” I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his lips, my heart bursting at the feeling of his smile against mine.
To my surprise, he pulled back. “She fucking said yes!” he hollered, slipping the ring on my finger.
In an instant, every Greyhound player, along with Ted, Beard, Rebecca, Higgins, and Keeley, burst into the tiny office, shouting and cheering and hugging each other with even more joy than when they’d finished first. Someone- Dani and Colin and Sam, I presumed- started throwing confetti around the office while we were ambushed with hugs and kisses and congratulations.
Keeley and Rebecca smothered me in their arms, offering their own words of excitement and joy. I looked at them suspiciously.
“There was no lunch, was there?”
Rebecca scrunched her nose and shook her head. “Roy asked if we could find an excuse to dress you up,” she admitted, tears in her eyes.
Keeley, who was openly crying, held up her phone. “And a good thing! Look how fucking beautiful you look!” Sure enough, I looked gorgeous in the photos Keeley had managed to take of the proposal. But my eyes were drawn to Roy’s face and the absolute joy that could be seen there.
I felt someone grab my hand and tug; Roy smiled down at me as he pulled me close. “Did I do good?” he murmured. When I nodded, he grunted. “Good. I’m actually impressed that these muppets could keep a fucking secret.”
As he pulled me into a proper kiss, Jamie and Sam started a chant that everyone quickly joined in: “He’s here, he’s there, he’s gonna marry her! Roy Kent! Roy Kent!”
~
The night before the wedding, I packed a bag to go stay at my parents’ house, where Keeley, my maid of honor, insisted on having a sleepover so she could see the shrine, as my childhood bedroom was often called.
Her mouth widened into that Cheshire-cat grin as she took in all the posters. “Holy shit, it’s even better than I imagined!” she giggled, setting her things down. “You’re telling me that Roy saw this, and that’s what made him decide to kiss you?”
Sitting down on my bed, I chuckled. “I know. He must’ve really fucking liked me.”
Instead of joining me, Keeley meandered around my room, pointing out different posters and tittering at them. She turned to me, eyebrow cocked. “Alright. Which one is your absolute favorite?”
I bobbled my head, grinning. “Well, there’s always this one.” I pointed above me to the poster of a young Roy that my dad and I had argued over the placement of. I stood and skipped over to the closet. “Or this one.” Taped inside my closet was a picture of a shirtless Roy running, the one that I’d secretly ripped out of a magazine when I was sixteen and spent far too many hours drooling over.
Keeley howled with laughter at the sight of it. “Holy shit, no wonder you’re marrying him, he looks fit as fuck there. Has he seen this one?”
“Abso-fucking-lutely not,” I answered, joining in her snickering. “That’s the one secret I’m going to keep from my husband, thank you very much.”
We spent the rest of the night sitting on my bed, gabbing and giggling and sharing the champagne Keeley had packed in her overnight bag, until Keeley knocked out next to me. I gazed up at the ceiling, staring at Roy, unable to believe what my life had become. When I had put that poster up, I was a giggling young girl, fantasizing about what it would be like to meet the guy on the poster, the one who made me betray my family and watch Chelsea matches. And in mere hours, I’d be standing in front of that same man and marrying him.
Oh, if only my teenage self could see me now.
As excited as teenage me would be about marrying Roy freaking Kent (and the fact that we got to shag that gorgeous man), she’d be even more excited to find out that he was kind. And loving. And funny. And good with dogs and kids, despite himself. And that he loved The Sound of Music and reading. And that he was a damn good cook. And that he begrudgingly sang Spice Girls songs on road trips. And that he loved us.
Before I drifted off to sleep, I blew a kiss to the Roy on my ceiling, silently thanking him for his role in introducing me to the real Roy Kent.
~
My hands started to sweat as I heard the violins playing. Keeley had squeezed me tight and shoved my bouquet in my hands before walking down the aisle, where Roy stood with Jamie, who he’d asked to be best man through gritted teeth. After Keeley went Phoebe, in her poofy dress, who, at this point, was probably more excited about the wedding than anyone else.
As I took my position in front of the closed doors, my dad linked our arms, smiling at me with gentle pride. “You ready?” With my mouth insanely dry, all I could manage was a firm nod. “Roy Kent,” he clucked, shaking his head. “You’re really marrying Roy fucking Kent.” He kissed my cheek. “And more importantly, you’re marrying someone who loves you the way you deserve.”
“That I am,” I managed, taking a deep breath as the doors opened.
Roy’s eyes lit up the moment he saw me, just like I knew mine did at the sight of him. As a surprise, I’d asked the violinists to play the wedding march from The Sound of Music for my walk down the aisle; I could see the moment Roy realized it, because he threw his head back and rolled his eyes cheekily.
After my dad kissed my cheek and placed my hand on Roy’s, Roy leaned forward. “My fucking Maria,” he whispered, shaking his head.
“My Captain von Trapp,” I countered with a wink.
~
Rebecca had meant it as a joke when she offered to let us use the Dog Track as our reception venue. But Roy and I jumped at the offer, thinking it was fitting, considering how central A.F.C. Richmond was to our relationship. In the days leading up to our wedding day, we spent hours transforming the pitch into a proper party space, surpassing all of our expectations.
After allowing people to mingle with appetizers and drinks, Ted, who we’d allowed to play emcee for the night, called us forward for toasts. Roy sighed and rolled his eyes, more of a reflex than anything else, and gripped my hand tight as we walked to the stage that Keeley had managed to have brought in.
Roy took the microphone from Ted with a grunt and a curt nod. He let out a deep breath and brought the microphone to his mouth. “Right. So, for some reason, everyone thinks that prick over there is my best friend.” He pointed at Jamie, who stood up, looking prouder than when he was named Player of the Year. “But honestly, this right here is my best friend in the world.” He turned back to me, ignoring the offended scoff from Jamie. “From the moment I crashed her father’s birthday dinner, she’s become my very best friend.” He cleared his throat and gave his head a little nervous scratch. “So, most people who know us know the story of how we got together. Dad’s birthday dinner, posters in the childhood bedroom, secret relationship that apparently everyone at Nelson Road fucking knew about. But, I’ve never told anyone about how I was basically a fucking stalker before any of that.”
I looked over at Roy quizzically. He smirked and continued.
“See, I fancied her the fucking moment I met her. Like, Ted brought her into the office, and I couldn’t say a fucking word. I think I told her not to wear any rank perfume and then just slouched off.” Everyone gave out a light chuckle. “Then I bought her lunch, as a way to, I dunno, make conversation. And we sort of started chatting at work a bit after that. And then this one Friday night she leaves early. And Ted says that he forgot to give her some papers he’d wanted her to work on over the weekend, and he’s all ‘Oh well, she can get it Monday’. But me, being properly whipped at this point, I fucking say ‘I’ll take it to her’.”
My jaw fell slightly; this whole time, I had thought Ted must’ve begged or bribed Roy to bring me those papers. Had he really brought them just to see me?
“I made up some shit about how she told me whereabouts she lived and that it wasn’t too far from my place. And now, looking back, I don’t think he fucking believed me.”
“Nope!” Ted called out with a hearty laugh. “I knew you were in love!”
Roy playfully shot Ted his favorite gesture and continued. “So, I realized I had no clue where she lived. And I felt like an absolute wanker. But then I remembered, we were on some stupid Snapchat group with Ted.”
“You’re welcome!” Ted chimed in again.
Roy rolled his eyes. “And this gorgeous idiot had her location on. So, I did what any sane guy would do: I fucking stalked her. And I turned into fucking Hugh Grant in Love Actually and went knocking on every door in that neighborhood like a right idiot. Until finally, I knocked on a door and saw this beautiful face.” He smiled gently at me. “And I realized right then that I loved that face. And I wanted to see that face every day.” He leaned over and gave me a small kiss. “So, I just want to say, I fucking love you. And I am so happy that I get to see your face and buy you kebabs for the rest of my life.” He took the champagne flute that Ted was holding out to him. “To Mrs. Roy Kent.”
“Mrs. Roy Kent!” everyone repeated, clinking their glasses together and sipping their champagne.
I toasted with Roy and took the microphone he offered me. “All I can say,” I started as everyone quieted, “is that dreams really do come true, and sometimes you get to marry the guy on the poster.” Everyone gave a light chuckle before I went on. “Honestly, though. Anyone who knows me knows that I have had a monstrous crush on this beautiful man for years. Pretty much since the day he made his debut. My poor dad had to watch me put up posters of a Chelsea player on my walls. Best day of his life was when Roy Kent came to Richmond, because it finally meant me putting up Greyhound posters.”
My dad’s laugh was the loudest of all.
“But I realized that today I’m not marrying some guy on a poster.” I turned to Roy and looked into his eyes. “Today I’m marrying Roy. The fit guy I met at work who cooks and who is a wonderful uncle and who loves Dan Brown novels and makes me happy.” I knew my smile was big and silly as I gazed at him. “When I met you, it was a dream come true, getting to know my big celebrity crush. But now, the life I’m living is better than any dream. And I love you for that. I absolutely love you.” I leaned over and planted a heated kiss on his lips, eliciting wolf-whistles from the Greyhounds. Blushing, I raised my glass. “To Roy!”
“To Roy!” came the echo, amidst cheers and sips of champagne.
Rot was relieved when the toasts were over (especially Jamie’s surprisingly tearful speech). We went through the rest of the motions- first dance, dinner, cutting the cake- and finally came to the part of the evening we were most looking forward to: the party. We danced with our friends and drank, reveling in the joy we all shared.
I was enjoying a dance with Beard when Roy grabbed my hand, saying he needed to show me something.
“Roy, can’t you wait until we leave for our honeymoon?” I teased as he led me away from the dance floor.
He rolled his eyes. “Sometimes I think you talk so fucking much just so I kiss you to try to shut you up,” he quipped.
We came to a stop at the edge of the party, where a flat wrapped package sat alone. I stared at Roy quizzically as he picked it up and handed it to me.
“I think your office can use some more décor,” he started slowly. “Especially because I heard some rumors about Higgins thinking about early retirement.”
I sighed and bit back a smile. “There has been talk,” I admitted. “Nothing set in stone, but I am definitely in the running to eventually become the D.F.O. once Higgins is ready to hand over the reins.” I gestured to whatever it was I held in my hands. “But what’s this?”
He bobbled his head. “Wedding gift. For your office. I’ve owed you this for a while now.”
My curiosity growing, I quickly opened the gift, letting the paper fall to the floor. It was something in a frame. I turned it over and threw my head back when I saw it.
It was the poster from my ceiling, the one Roy and I sat under when we kissed for the first time, only now it was framed. And more importantly, autographed.
“You’re an arsehole,” I laughed, cupping Roy’s cheek and pressing a kiss to his lips. “And I fucking love it.”
He shrugged, taking the poster from my hands and laying it down so he could hold me, leaning his forehead to mine. “Told you I’d autograph it for you,” he mumbled before peppering kisses all over my face. “I think it’ll look fucking great in your office, don’t you?”
I laughed and nodded. “Even if I don’t become D.F.O., I’ll still have the best office decorations in the building.”
Roy pulled back, studying my face carefully. “Fuck that. You’re going to get it.” He kissed me again. “After all, you’re a fucking superstar.”
I let out a small huff, embarrassed by the praise. “Roy-”
“Don’t you ever stop talking?”
And with that, he shut me up in the best way he knew how.
~
Taglist: @optimisticsandwichgladiator @giggling-sewer-ginger @katdahlali @sonyume @djarindroid @reading-blogs @thezimi @benedictscanvasmain @wibblywobblyvampywolfystuff @puckyou-forpuckssake @old-enough-to-know-better73 @ladygrey03 @soundofboots @justsomefunshit @geekgirl1996 @tedssweaters @queen-of-dumbasses @miaalltheway @di-essere-amato @shakespeareanwannabe @hotdoglamp @mal-adaptive-dreams @allthetroubleiveseen @netflix-addict @callmecasey81 @forgetmeaway @royalestrellas @kingleahhh @lemoonandlestars @ghxxxf @jill2629-blog @sunderland-6 @janalustare @ellouisa17
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luvyunjinxo · 1 year
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I hate you
Sakura Miyawaki x fem!sub!reader
CW: not proofread, caught masturbation, humiliation, mommy kink, bondage maybe? & overstimulation
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"I really hate you, you know?" "Then why are you under me?"
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚˚₊
You and Sakura were enemies hated each other for life. You didn't know how this rivalry started but it just did I guess. You guys were roommates sharing a house with all your friends. Your friends were aware that you guys hated each other, but they never seemed to care because they loved both of you.
Once again on a Friday afternoon you had no plans while everyone else did. You thought that everyone was out of the house but you were wrong. You pulled out your phone watching the videos Sakura had posted since she was a youtuber. She vlogged around the house but would always stay out of her way so her fans didn't know you as much.
You were clueless. Not knowing that you're starting to get wet by the second. She had posted a video on her workout and you're starting to get needy? Weird of you. You started to feel the wetness travel down your thighs so you decided to finally do something about it. Your hands went down to take your shorts and underwear off while the other placed down your laptop to the side.
Man you knew this was bad, but you needed to get rid of the feeling. Poor Sakura not knowing any of this happening, or did she? Anyways your hands traveled down to toy with your clit then inserting two fingers in. In, out, and in again making lewd noises. Then eventually noises started to come out and as soon as you know it you were screaming her name. How embarrassing.
Surprise, Sakura was home this whole time. You didn't know how thin the walls were but her room was literally next to yours. She pressed her ear against the door and knocked once. Second knock, no answer. Third? There was no third. She barged in like it was nothing and her jaw dropped to the floor. You didn't say anything but panicked and covered yourself with the blanket that was underneath you.
She scoffed. "I could hear you from the other room could you at least try and be quiet? What if everyone else was home"
You were just in shock. "And what were you even getting off to? I swear I could've heard my name yelled at least a thousand times."
"Lets check that laptop of yours, shall we?" "Sakura no."
"Why Y/n? I know you're hiding something, but what is it?" She scoffed again once she finally got the computer you guys were fighting for 10 seconds ago. She opened it and saw herself working out, specifically doing planks.
"Well what do we have here? You're getting off to the person you hate the most? So pathetic you are. Lets see whats under that blanket."
Oh my god you were dripping. Badly. Your puffy cunt was smothered in wetness. How embarrassing, again. She collected your wetness with her finger and put it back into her mouth. Damn that was hot. "Y/n do you have a tie somewhere?"
"B-by that closet."
"Stuttering before we even got started?" She went over to the closet to grab three ties and started to tie up your arms together, then tied down one of your legs to the bed, then the other. You were now fully restrained under Sakura Miywaki's touch. Could get destroyed any second now really.
"Fuck the foreplay, I wanna have a taste already."
She dived fully in giving you the best head you've ever had but you were so sensitive due to the other orgasms you gave yourself a few minutes ago. You were squirming so much you almost broke out of the ties but she held your waist down. She kept eating you out but started to switch and entered two fingers in and started pumping fast, plus starting to toy with your buds with her tongue.
"mommy! I-Its t-too much" She ignored you but kept going faster having you cum in no time. But anyways she kept going not stopping one bit, leaving you overstimulated.
"I c-cant take it anymore~"
"You can and you will. Shut up and keep still."
You reached your third orgasm in a row and she finally stopped. She gave you a sloppy kiss and said
"That was just the beginning. Don't you think you deserve a punishment for touching yourself?"
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thesarcasticreader · 2 years
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PAC 18+: WHO IS HAVING WHAT FANTASIES ABOUT YOU?
IF YOU ARE MINOR, OFF YOU GO FROM THIS POST. ENJOY A TEA PARTY, NOT AN 18+ READING!
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These are general readings meant for entertainment purposes. You can partake in advice, but do not let it cloud your decision-making.
I do take paid readings. You can contact me for them. Make sure you have either Paypal or Gpay! DM for the price list!
(IMAGES ARE TAKEN FROM PINTEREST)
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Pile 1:
This person will love hugging. It's not a kink but they love it very much. For very few, they could be into the whole spanking thing. They are on the dominant side. They fancy you misbehaving and them schooling you, so there's that.
They love seeing you in flowy, risqué dresses. Something about wearing basically that netted lingerie is coming through. They would want you to embrace your body as it is and prefer it when you do not hide your body from them. They will want you naked all the time. If you are home, you remain naked. That’s their rule. This person hates beating around the bush when it comes to sex. They see it as a natural thing, and they do not give a fuck about what the world says. They live fully.
They will play out every single one of their fantasy. They love cuddling after sex. You two can share some food and drinks or even cigarettes if that's your thing afterwards. Your pillow talk will include food.
Strawberry would be their favourite food. You could smell or taste like strawberries to them.
They love blowjobs/ oral from you. They literally cannot get enough of your mouth. They would die a very happy person if they received orals for the rest of their lives.
They are scared of losing you to someone else. They would write you love letters and even give you gift baskets randomly. They would love to take you out for a picnic and then draw out an orgasm or two.
This person is religious and traditional. They may ask your assistance if they are into witchcraft Lilly and orchids may have relevance. Marriage is sacred to them. They only marry when they are sure.
They don’t want anyone who is materialistic. Out of place but this person loves a fluffy bed with a lot of pillows. Guess they use the pillows to settle you in the perfect position. Try it if you haven't. It helps.
They aren’t vanilla but they aren’t crazy wild either. This is respectful sex with multiple rounds.
They love coloured hair. They are going to be obsessed with watching you sleep. They may even wake you up with sex. Morning sex is their favourite. Take it as it resonates but threesomes orgies may be their thing. Or at least they will fantasize about it. They may have grown up on a farm. Their fantasies include taking you from behind and fingering you at the same time.
They are the more dominant in the relationship. You two are tied to fate or maybe a twin flame.
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Pile 2:
Death by orgasm. That's it. That's what came through immediately. You will be a little overwhelmed when you sleep with this person. They give it all. All or nothing is their motto.
This person is super possessive. They will not tolerate anyone hitting on you. They will mark their territory, drag you home and mark you some more. A very heavy Scorpio energy. You or they may have a Scorpio venus. Capricorn is prevalent too.
Makeup sex would be their thing. They fight and fuck. Hehe.
Sore body parts and all the work. You probably know where this is going, but the relationship with this person can be toxic.
Britney's Toxic playing in the background. 🎶🎶With a taste of your lips, I'm on a ride You're toxic, I'm slippin' under With a taste of a poison paradise I'm addicted to you🎶🎶
Anyway, To alleviate stress this person would go for sex. Let’s put it this way. All of life’s problem has one solution according to this person and that’s sex. This person's approach is flawed but in an odd way. They are not overly optimistic but they aren't pessimistic either. You could describe their view of the world as mundane. Is that a weird word? Sure. But it's true. They are flexible in thinking but they don't give two fucks about things.
This person may piss you off a bit sometimes. They can be secretive and impulsive. They have a mouth that runs a mile too long. This can frustrate you and flare insecurities, that's why if you meet this person or have met this person, hesitate to enter into this relationship until you are sure that this person has the ability to self-reflect and adapt.
They love your boobs. They stare at those a lot. For the male audience, the feminine is going to be leaving bite marks all over your upper body. Plus if you ever try to seduce them, they are a goner. The fun part is if you tease them throughout the day bit by bit. They are going to torture you through the night. Delaying orgasms, and edging all the good but frustrating stuff  This person expresses themselves through sex.
Hibiscus may be important for this pile. Pineapple is what they would describe your smell. There may be communication issues at the beginning of this relationship. This person will learn to listen. Be patient with them. Rough hardcore sex is their thing. Oof, your poor legs.
This person has a lot of healing to do. This feels like a twin flame thing. It's not bad, but there is a lot of misunderstanding because many of the habits are being reflected and they/ you may want to run away from but cannot.
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Pile 3:
This person will indulge in a lot of car sex and kitchen sex. This person is someone who will love to introduce aphrodisiacs in the bedroom or the kitchen, anyway.
Shower sex is there but you guys are not going to indulge in that one very much.
Vanilla is what you smell like to them. Poison ivy may have some relevance to this pile. Plants have come through for each pile. So idk if that's a message for me to start doing green witchcraft or encourage people for the same. Confusing times.
This person would love to tie your legs together, hold them up and pound it out. In the case of the feminine, she will love to tie you up. Her personality is going to be more dominant than yours. She would not be shy about sex. This pile may be drawn to pile 1 as well. There is a lot of difference in the relationship dynamics and that may be why you chose this pile.
This person is very transformative. They like to adapt and change as per the world. Not in a superficial way, but having a transformational mindset. They are very, very progressive. This person could like the colour green.
This person may travel a lot too. You would have to opportunity to explore a lot of places with this person. Greece, Turkey and Morrocco came straight through. This person will introduce you to a part of this world you would have never thought you would be a part of. This person does seem financially well-off. Like taking two trips to foreign countries rich. That's pretty amazing. You may be expecting a little more from this person but you do have certain financial insecurity which you could project onto them. Time to do shadow work!
You are going to be smaller than this person if you are feminine. And for the masculine, this person is going to be smaller than you.
You know how some people mark great memories of new places with sex? Yeah. That’s this person. You guys will celebrate with sex when you travel to a new place.
Basically very experimental, not dull and dour. Tying you up may be on the menu every now and then while teasing with a vibrator.  This person would love to gift you sex toys  And you are going to love to tease this person. They are a big fan of that habit.
They love to see you masturbate. Knee-high boots and wearing nothing is the key to their pants. They might give you a red necklace as a present too.
They love grabbing you when you walk past them. It could be the ass the boobs whatever. There is also another element. You two gossip a lot.
Like if there’s tea that either of you heard, both of you know. There is no point in asking you to not tell anyone because you will tell this person. You two are like besties.
IF YOU WANT MORE READINGS, YOU CAN CHECK MY INSTAGRAM: @A_sarcastic_Reader.
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slitheringghost · 3 months
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Lily Evans Fic Rec List
Part One: Blood Magic
These fics incorporate a Lily who did intentional magic to defeat Voldemort rather than the "it was Love" explanation. If anyone has more recs along this line, please please leave it replies/reblogs, I'm always looking for more!
the stranger in the shell of a lover by @slashmarks (Snape/Lily, 11.3k, T)
Rec: Slashmarks writes my favorite Lily of all time, and this is the literal best concept - Lily as DADA teacher who breaks Voldemort's Defense curse, with a hilarious and compelling Snape/Lily teacher romance.
This was very like Sev. He was good and he was bad; she loved him and hated him and it was simply a coin toss which would come out on top at any given occasion. He was her first best friend and the closest she had ever had, the boy she had snuck out at night to meet and whisper about her fights with Tuney and who had in turn muttered recalcitrant confessions about his parents' fights. They had made up spells together, learned about illegal magic and acquired the first gasps of the skills they would use in the war: Sev to kill and Lily to save. He was the only person she had ever let read pieces of her diary. He had spent years helping torment her muggleborn friends until finally she had refused to let him make her an exception, and then she had been included, too.
The Art Of Dying by The_wig_is_a_metaphor (James/Lily, 11.4k, M)
Rec: I love the magical worldbuilding details in here, Lily’s dynamic with Dorcas, and conflict with James over Dark magic.
“Lily—it's not a waste of time—the power of names—” “Is a superstition, like everything else—like your fear of me, and of what I'm doing—oh yes, you think I haven't noticed?” Lily sneers, and it's a strange, ugly expression that makes her face look wrong and unfamiliar. “You think I haven't noticed how you avoid me? How you can't stand to touch me, or my son? How you hate me for what I made you watch—what I made you do? So reluctant to contribute even a moment of pain for the safety of my son—” 'My son', again. Not 'our son'.
where dust was once a man by slashmarks (Lily/Narcissa, 3.3k, T)
Rec: A Lily Comes Back Wrong/is semi-resurrected fic - the writing is stunning and it utilizes the parallels between Lily and Narcissa, and Lily and Voldemort, so well. Plus there's a great Narcissa and Bellatrix dynamic.
"Poor Narcissa Black," said Lily Evans, mocking, from her bedroom inside Malfoy Manor. She spoke to Narcissa by the name Narcissa still called herself in her head, the unmarried youngest Black sister forever in her mind. "You have what you wanted, don't you? Your pureblood husband, your ancestral manor, your pureblood son. You have your sister back, the only sister you deign to acknowledge, and you have your service to a Dark Lord, but it isn't what you thought it would be, is it? He's going to take your son, the same way he tried to take mine... But you won't do what I did. You can't do what I did, but I don't think you'd want to anyway."
we’re already in the aftermath by slashmarks (Sirius/Lily/Remus, 15.8k, T)
Rec: Master of Death Lily grappling with her and Harry surviving post 1981 and magical Britain's reaction to her post defeating Voldemort, with a dark and fascinating spin on James/Lily.
Lily had been dead for months in a very literal sense. She had planned for this, of course; planned and calculated and bargained for Death to take her place and leave her waiting, asleep more than gone. She hadn't known what it would feel like: the waking, the return to life, the horrifying, nauseating fear and the relief and the guilt. Harry was alive. Harry was fine. James was not, and it was her fault. She had planned for James's death and accepted it as a part of the price of her bargain with Death. If James had been willing to go along with what she was doing, to hear about it and help and participate, she might have saved him. She might have tried to persuade him anyway, but of course she had seen his horrified objection to even so much as she had to do for Dumbledore to break Voldemort's curses and had known better.
defector of a kind by slashmarks (Sirius/Lily, Lily & Marlene, Orion & Sirius, 7.8k, T)
Rec: A fic about Lily getting involved in the political situation during the First War, with really fascinating Orion characterization.
Voldemort was supposed to have mastered death, and bragged about it constantly. Lily was going to beat him at his own game – but first she had to understand it. - Sirius sighed. "Did you really write to my cousin and tell her she and the – and Voldemort screwed up a curse analysis?" "Yeah, I really did. Fifth year." "Jeezus," Sirius said, imitating Mary – not Lily. She had known she needed to blend by the time she started first year, from Sev. It was a strange kind of caution that had governed her cursing and her clothes, even the length she let her mother cut her hair as a child, but hadn't told her not to write letters correcting the leaders of a fascist revolution in their intellectual endeavors.
Lily Potter & the Lightning Bolt Scar by rosestone (Sirius & Lily, Harry & Lily, 15.5k, T)
Rec: Lily is resurrected by the Golden Trio; absolutely fantastic Lily characterization. Rosestone also wrote the fic Cure centered on an OC which incorporates Lily deflecting the Killing Curse intentionally.
"You're probably thinking about that time I booby-trapped that old Order safehouse before the Death Eaters got there." Sirius scoffed as he shoved a pile of blankets away.  "You booby-trapped it while they were blasting the wards down!  You almost killed yourself doing whatever that ritual was you made up on the bloody fly - and wasn't that a nice thing to discover while I was trying to drag you out, that you were playing with magic the Ministry outlawed for a damn good reason like it was Baby's First Potion-Making Kit -" - Magic surged around Lily, dangerous and wild and full of possibility, and she laughed.  Maybe this would go wrong.  Maybe she'd drag her own soul out alongside the horcrux.  But right now - right now, with magic curled around her like a lover's caress, she wasn't sure she believed anything could go wrong ever again. Voldemort wouldn't know what hit him.
The Recruitment by silenceinwinter2019 (James/Lily, 8.4k, T)
Rec: This explores Voldemort recruiting Lily to the Death Eaters. I adore the interactions between Voldemort and Lily, and Bellatrix and Lily, in this.
She barked out a laugh. “Am I supposed to kiss your feet with teary thanks now? Singing thank you, my lord for letting me live over my son’s corpse? Geez, what kind of fucked up family did you have?” Those red eyes were unreadable, but his magic closed in on her, and it smoldered, turning oppressive. “If your mind is made to die with your spawn, I will not waste my time convincing you otherwise,” he said. “Let your foolish Gryffindor honor serve you right then.”
Part Two
Groundhog day by @artemisia-black (James/Lily, Harry & Lily, Harry & James, 900 words, G)
Rec: A beautiful snapshot of the Potter family with such vivid descriptions.
And as a squeal of Harry's laughter washed over her, her heart beat a rhythm of contradiction—each beat a testament to the love that overflowed for the small, fragile life they had created. Yet, each beat pulsed with an undercurrent of fear so palpable it threatened to consume her. The love she held for Harry was a fierce, enveloping entity; it cocooned him in an embrace so tight that the thought of anything piercing that cocoon sent tremors through her. 
but tonight your hand is steady by @broomsticks/leftsidedown (James/Lily, 1.8k, T)
Rec: "Five times Lily walked away and one time she stayed" - a wonderful character study.
That first night she thought she’d be able to appreciate forever how this new world sparkled—its floating candles and starry-sky ceilings and the talking paintings and walking suits of armour—but a week was all she got. She’d been so focused on getting to her next class—left around the marble bust of Warwick the Whatever, up two flights of stairs—or was it just one? What day of the week was this again?—that she registered the hard shove against her shoulder only when she hit the ground, quills snapping and inkpots shattering.
Stay Close by @turanga4 (Lily & Harry, 389 words, T)
Rec: A evocative and heartbreaking mini fic about The Forest Again.
Her beautiful boy, resting in her arms in the place where she belonged. Her brave, gentle son, laying murdered on this ground. It wouldn’t hurt. It wouldn’t hurt. But the idea of it pierced her more keenly than even her own death had, more even than meeting his starved eyes through the Mirror. Time must have meant something. Pain must have been possible. She remembered that she had wept as she beamed at him, and he’d seemed to do the same. Seeing, now, her child grown up and standing in the Forest, she found herself longing for a thing that she recoiled from, and felt herself caught between the sadness and the joy.
three knocks upon the door by @lunapwrites (Lily/Tonks, Sirius & Lily & Remus, 6.9k, E)
Rec: A Lily/Tonks casefic that sold me on the ship, and I especially love Lily's dynamic with Sirius and Remus in this. These characters are all feral and wild and in love with each other.
No, it was rather more the fact that Lily Potter had emerged from thin air behind her with the unconscious body of the real Ministry official Tonks was impersonating and dropped him at Lupin’s feet like a fresh kill. It was the fact that at a nod from her, Black and Lupin both fell upon him like a pair of starving dogs.
wrest up by the root by leftsidedown (Lily/Astoria, 200 words, M)
Rec: The rarepair I never knew I needed, and such an effective fic in so few words. These lines absolutely haunted me:
Shouts in the distance, but she heard only a whisper: “The only perfect mother is a dead one.”
flowers kiss and miss by leftsidedown (Lily/Narcissa, 1.4k, T)
Rec: Stunning writing and characterization through several mini fics weaved together.
That redhead Gryffindor who hangs with that Snape boy — Evans — has some awfully odd ideas. She thinks mermaids are red-haired. She thinks they sing. She thinks they’re beautiful.
some such trouble cling like vines by slashmarks (Snape & Lily, Lily & Harry, Lily & Mary, 3.4k, T)
Rec: An HBP canon divergent fic where Harry finds a box of Lily's letter in Snape's office right after Snape kills Dumbledore. The Lily voice in her letters is so wonderful and accurate to canon.
I've had about a million ideas for that potion we were working on. They're attached but promise me you won't try them until I'm back at school! First of all I'd never forgive you if I didn't get to see how they work out, but second you know it's not safe to experiment alone. Especially with a potion you'll be trying on yourself. Really, promise me - I enchanted the letter so once you get this far you have to promise me out loud or it'll all go blank, including my notes...
Defying Divination by shaggydogstail (Lily/Alice, Lily/Narcissa, Lily/Rosmerta, Lily & Sirius, Lily & Severus, T, 32k)
Rec: A lovely weaving in of tarot in this, and includes some of my favorite Lily femslash and Lily and Sirius friendship. Shaggydogstail writes an excellent Lily in general, reccing all their fics with her!
Professor Dammerall was a nice enough man, made bearable by the fact that he didn’t seem to take his own lessons too seriously, but Lily still found it difficult to concentrate on the meanings of shapes in tea dregs or crystal balls. There seemed to be an extraordinary number of rules, all of them fuzzy and indefinite, and she never could quite absorb them all. Underneath it all, Lily resisted the idea of Divination, of a future mapped out and governed by the fates. She never had much liked being told what to do.
a meeting of the minds by slashmarks (Sirius/Lily, 3.6k, E)
Rec: I've recced this a billion times but it remains a fave.
"Merlin, you're gorgeous," Sirius said, once he had her bra off (with minimal fumbling, but then he had dated the muggleborn Valerie Webster last year before her whole family was killed, so this was no large surprise). "Sweet of you," Lily said cynically but she also took his hands and put them, lightly, on her chest, so it had worked well for him. "You can touch, you know," she said, and was unable to keep it from coming out shyly. "Thank you," Sirius said, sincerely - she could really see why half of the school was in love with him, damn it -
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