#literally cannot believe that i am the only person in TWO servers who knows what gorp is
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(for reference: it stands for Good Ol’ Raisins and Peanuts; generally it contains other things, but those are the base ingredients. it is, essentially, trail mix, but calling it GORP usually implies it’s homemade)
#mine#was just thinking about this again#literally cannot believe that i am the only person in TWO servers who knows what gorp is
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What I want out of a QSMP season two.
(Some of these points may be a little divisive - it's just my personal opinion. Content creators will be referred to as players for conciseness. QSMP as it has been for the past year, for the sake of this post, will be referred to as "season 1".)
1. TAKE A FUCKING BREAK.
I do not want to see the QSMP coming back in less than two months at the very, very least. Five or six months to a year is ideal, in my opinion.
This is for a few reasons. Firstly, the obvious; I want Quackity Studios to take the necessary time to make 100% sure that everyone who has worked, does work, or will work for them is compensated. Not just this, but I want the communication among the studio to become streamlined and consistent, for the purpose of maintaining the quality of the SMP, the quality of life of the employees, and entirely avoiding a repeat of the previous situation. Any less will be unacceptable, and prove that all people in charge, including and especially Quackity himself, have not learned their lesson.
Secondly, I am very sure that a lot of players will lack or have completely lost their motivation for the QSMP, due to the nature of the last few months of season 1. I am sure that those who had a lot of lore written up and had to scrap it or cut it short are probably still quite sore about it, and may not have the energy to pick the QSMP story back up. This is especially true if they had already given their characters a canon ending and don't want to overshadow it. When creating a new SMP, or a new season of an SMP, you first and foremost need player motivation to be high. Waiting several months would ensure that the wound of player lore being ruined would have mostly healed over by the start of season 2.
Thirdly, viewer engagement will always be an important thing to take into consideration when creating an SMP that will be televised. The large majority of QSMP fans are completely burned out from watching. Leaving a large gap between seasons 1 and 2 would let fans, who have had an exhausting last few months, recover and reset. It will also allow hype and anticipation to build up when things eventually start being teased and announced again. Fans have a lot of disdain for this project at the present moment, and waiting for a while between seasons will not only let fans know that serious action is being taken behind the scenes, but also will let the sour attitude a lot of fans have right now wear off over time.
2. RESET. FOR REAL THIS TIME.
Probably my most controversial take on this topic will be; I fully believe that if a QSMP season 2 is to occur, it should be a completely new server. By completely new I naturally mean a new map, but also ZERO LORE CONTINUATION. I know this is a hot take, but I personally believe QSMP season 2 is a perfect chance for a completely fresh start, and a fresh start cannot happen if it still takes place in the same universe.
We all know that season 1's lore was overwhelming, slightly confusing, and at the end of the day, completely disjointed. We all fell in love with the terrifying Federation and Codes, yes, we all loved the basis of the story; a group of people from different countries get stranded on a "perfect" paradise island controlled by a governmental body that won't let them leave, and have to work together; but at the end of the day, the lore of season 1 became messy. Very messy. Instead of trying again and again to salvage it, the best option is probably to just start again.
Put the same players in a different map, give them a completely different premise, and let the lore unfold anew. Which leads into my next point.
3. PLAYER DRIVEN LORE.
Let the players develop the story. If a player has an overarching storyline they are unfolding themselves, prioritise letting them do so. All of the best lore in season 1 was player created, and player enacted; Cellbit's regret arc, the happy pills, Cellbit's murdering Fed workers arc, literally everything Fit ever did, Roier's lore, ect ect ect. Server admins should only intervene in player's lore when directly asked, and big changes to the server's status quo should only occur when there is no active lore to be interrupted, everyone agrees it should happen, and it would actively drive engagement up, rather than down.
The best case scenario for a QSMP season 2, in my opinion, is for the server admins and Quackity to come up with an exciting and engaging premise for a brand new universe with brand new characters, to place the players in an interesting themed map, and just let them loose. Let the lore build naturally, and see what comes of it.
IN CONCLUSION.
I vehemently disagree with people who believe the QSMP should not have a season 2. The QSMP is a brilliant idea, and its noble goals shine through all of the incredible friendships and memories it, and only it, made. There is no other server like QSMP.
The act of uniting people from all over the world has been proven to be an extremely important and worthwhile goal. I, genuinely, admire Quackity for his passion in this, and for understanding that this thing should not be easily given up on or let go. Drastic changes need to occur, but the QSMP is bigger than just a Minecraft server; it represents so much unity, community, and love.
It is worth saving.
I hope, desperately and for the sake of everyone involved, past future and present, that the QSMP can come back better and stronger than ever, continuing to further its goals; to tell amazing stories, to forge impossible friendships, to spark joy and laughter, and to bring people together no matter the barriers keeping them apart.
Thank you for reading.
#qsmp#yer man wrote an entire literal essay completely willingly#if only I'd had this energy for my GCSEs
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part 1 - [you are here!] - part 3
yepyep . making true on my promise to make this a three parter i guess! hopefully the final part will be out soon
disclaimer: i am not blaming trans women as a whole for my trauma, nor am i saying that the patriarchy doesnt exist. lol. ok bye
text transcript / partial id once again under the cut!
UH-OH! part 2: no lol
i was a
uh
xenogender kid? double-rainbow freak?
[a drawing of very slightly younger me, awkwardly smiling and going "yaaaay".]
we don't have any slurs i think which is good but you get the idea
i tried a
[caps] LOT [end caps]
of other terms before i really settled with this one
[a drawing of a man with a shadow over his eyes. he has two sharp horns protruding out of his head. the drawing is captioned "genderfaun".]
[a drawing of little me singing "lemon boy" by cavetown, captioned "soft boi".]
[and, finally, a drawing of a slightly abstract creature with a long dress and tall horns, drawn in grey, and with vines crawling around it, captioned "voidpunk [hi fomes]']
it wasn't an instant click.
it took a lot of hearing the word, seeing the community in the corner of my eye, and finding 15 subreddits before i started thinking
[a drawing of younger me, looking at a subreddit, and going "oh, shit,"]
[followed by a decently well-drawn frontal sketch of me, genuinely smiling, sparkles around him, going "it me!!!"]
okay, so, like,
[caps] THIS. [end caps]
this has to be it.
i'm happy
i know who i am
i know [caps] WHAT [end caps] i am
i found an amazing community with amazing people working together to create something beautiful
[caps] THIS [end caps] is the end [caps] RIGHT?????
[a drawing of me, sobbing cartoonishly, my glasses foggy due to the tears.]
[followed, in the next page, by a half-view of my face, my glasses clouded due to light shining on them harshly.]
turns out knowing yourself and who you are and where you belong
isn't always quite enough.
[a drawing of me, face down, cushioned by my arms, my glasses next to me. below the drawing, black spikes rise, covering the bottom half of the comic.]
a lot of things happened very very quickly.
at least it sure felt that way
[a drawing of me, white against black, staring in horror at my phone.]
turns out my brother wasn't the only person who didn't believe my identity made sense.
there was - and probably still IS - a group of trans people dedicated to making sure trans men know their place.
we are the oppressors, we cannot be oppressed, no men can be oppressed.
no men can be [as in, feel] harmed. no men can be kind. no men can be loving. no men should be allowed to exist
testosterone is poison. it makes you violent, and it makes you cruel. it makes you ugly, and unlovable.
you are encroaching on trans territory by simply existing as a trans man.
anything you do or say or think or feel or know is at the expense of the oppressed. of trans women
your existence harms them and must be stopped.
[a crude, nearly featureless drawing of me, holding my glasses, staring in shock.]
i was fourteen ish when someone i knew on a discord server asked,
"if all men were to be killed and you were included would you feel gender euphoria?"
[a drawing of younger me, looking at his phone, one eye obscured, going "huh?"]
she was a trans girl and i think her name was lily.
but, uh, obviously,
men are oppressors
[a drawing of me, looking to the ground.]
men can't be oppressed
men can't be hurt! so
it's fine.
so if you really ARE hurt or oppressed,
[caps] YOU'RE A WOMAN [end caps]
and that means you feel dysphoric
[a drawing of me, gripping at my own shirt, staring at the camera, smiling in fear.]
and you wouldn't want to feel dysphoric, right?
that's
[caps] REALLY
THE WORST
PART OF
THIS
SITUATION
RIGHT?
[an incredibly messy, quickly-scribbled drawing of me, quite literally falling apart, now grinning slightly wildly, massive bags under his eyes.]
[caps] THE WORST POSSIBLE OUTCOME [end caps]
[in large font] ...uh oh.
[a small drawing of me, a single tear coming out of one of my eyes, a hand raised up as if to brush it away, obviously scared.]
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mole game 01
today is february the first,
i am the most motivated person in the world right now i am literally god, i am having a prophetic episode and everyone is my pawns
i am going to learn the unity game engine as one with such an overload of emotions and a psychotic mind would do. I believe the best therapy is to just give urself work and convince yourself it is actually really fun.
why do i want to learn a game engine, because i want to make a game, for gaming. I'm a bit of a prophet gamer, like a holy spirit that makes video games for all the poor peasants
I have chosen unity game engine because the internet is made for gnomes, and im not picking no engine made and spread around for gnomes, im no gnome. I will rip out all of my body hair if someone tells me to try out gadot game engine, i shouldnt even be hearing those words, just make it easier for me, im a beginner how do you expect me to learn on that shit.
the internet makes things so much harder for me to learn this shit, makes it impossible to know who to trust, youtube does not help, ive tried in the past to learn but youtube video tutorials do not help in the slightest, ill just find my brain going into college lecture mode and just write down code and not even understand anything
unity docs are also chronically impossible to read, its like a different language, its like they thought that they needed to restate all their type functions and shit in their docs and not say anything about what they do besides what they output or something, even though you already get this information from your IDE.
you can scrub over here, rant is over ill get into what I have done
i followed game makers toolkit tutorial for unity which idk if i should be like embarassed to mention considering my distaste my tutorial videos, i dislike this video for like spending alot of time explaining what code does like as if someone who doesnt know c-sharp at all isnt going to have like a really hard time after watching the video. but its like mildly encouraging to learn on your own and find your own problems and whatnot to work on.
I made the dumb flappy bird clone and made like a pencil character and like some book assets which was probably the fun part, really cool seeing your own art be in a video game.
here is flazzyjohn completely preserved as a gif on the tumblr servers
the only two things i even bothered to do after doin all the shit in his video is make the wing sprite change when pressing the space key and like that sucked, unity animation system looks like its going to be something that i will hate the more i use it, and i made it to where when the walls/books spawn they like randomly choose what sprite they are out of the 3 book sprites i made
brackeys unity videos which people seem to praise in the youtube comment sections really feel like dumbbed down youtube content in the meanest way possible, i refuse to accept that the answer to my problem is that you used a function that you made in a different video and actually i should watch that, just flash the code on the screen or something, its literally not worth my time
ok now i will exclaim my prophetic invision for my incredibily intricate first real game that i will burn out on sooner or later, you cannot convince me otherwise
either that or ill backout and make a snake clone or something
BUT then ill work on it
I want to make a 3d game, i know dumb, it would be like shitty low poly if that rationalizes it in anyway (it doesnt).
I have one idea that im kinda hyperfocusing on right now thats really simple but really complex and already hyper engineered in my head.
im imagining like a really dumbed down mining game wit like gumdrop-shaped moles with big handheld drills
(ignore the chibi robo they wont be in the game)
so ur this little mole guy and theres like a mole city wit like people to talk to or whatever (they would exist just to give u fetch quests and dumb dialogue) and the fetch quests would consist of going down the big elevator in the center and heading into the ever changing mines or something lore something lore
made this ms paint drawing for a friend in a jiffy
the like splotches of colored areas is supposed to be what minerals looks like on a map you recieve everytime you go into the mines, its always the same level, it just resets through like shifting rock or something, thats why there will be a time limit of like 2 minutes or something idk to grab ur shit and get out.
the map would be start out like one of those like lottery ticket scratch off things, and u gotta scratch it off like really fast.
i guess like the point is to like implement alot of weird stuff to do on the map that takes up your time inside the mine, since the main game concept is kinda simple
a sense of progression could be implemented through items given by the npc's that let you do more weird stuff with your map, like reveal hidden minerals and shit
i got like two ideas rn:
ones just like a pencil that you have to hold down and wait for your mole character to draw out a line to where you currently are, because the map wouldnt like show where you are.
another where you have like a limited use item where you could put like magnetic dust that sticks to a certain part of the map that would tell u where a secret mineral is or somethin.
im thinkin like this can only work in a 3d game for like selfish and learning reasons, i have like a few inspirations to go off of too
i had to play like 30 minutes of this game for like screenshots but like this shit, fairly oddparents shadow showdown encapsulates the gamecube era of games, i also played way too much of it like 3 years ago because i thought it would be fun to speedrun and wasted alot of time on it. Mostly just taking inspiration from the incredibly simple icons and text boxes.
Woooo i lovwe animal crossing i love making fake relationships with animal people, growing up with animal crossing did not impact me in the slightest, not a single thing. Ive always really liked the ui design in animal crossing, i will be ripping it off in some shape or fashion, i will decide if it will be shameless or not at a later date
Main issue with making a 3d game is that i gotta learn blender and thats makes it difficult because i also have to learn how to make a 3d model like look good
Anyways I dont expect this to be done for awhile, but im hoping the pressure from starting a log, generally just to complain and complain about how unreadable documentation can be.
This is supposed to spark the start and I will be opening a unity project and trying make a cube move with WASD whenever i have free time and im not drawing.
#game dev#computer science#dont steal my ideas i will make you feel really bad#like send you really personally attacking mail#completely psychoanalyze you and pick out everything that makes you insecure#mole game
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troublemaker
― dancer youtubers!lee heeseung x gn!dance major!reader
sparks fly when the top two dancers on youtube collab!
genre: slow-burn fluff, s2l
wc: 3.9k (omg i'm sorry) + 2 twitter pics
warnings: probably some wrong dance terminology, slightly suggestive (the dance is just 😳), short timeskip, it's cheesy please bear with me
part of my youtuber enhypen series, the fifth upload! feel free to read on its own~ ♞──────────────────────────♞
you finish off your last move with your arms wide open, your chest heaving up and down from lack of breath. smiling nevertheless, you know you absolutely love the feeling of getting your breath taken away after dancing because you know it meant you did your best. you walk towards the camera lens and peek at the comments through your open laptop.
"did you all enjoy that?" you ask breathlessly grinning. the flooding comments are filled with compliments from your cover of nct u's boss. however, one comment, in particular, caught your eye as others seemed to reply to it.
heeseung ✔ 2s ago wow that was amazing do you wanna do a collab sometime? 😊
line break insurance you've failed me 5x already
your eyes widen as you let out a gasp. "is that the lee heeseung?" you accidentally say out loud. you wince at the realization of your mistake. the comments are both praising you for your success in getting noticed by the other top dancer on youtuber and relating to your remark.
heeseung ✔ 3s ago haha yes it's me dm me if you want to hear more about it 🤍
"oh wow... this is really cool..." you state before blinking to get you out of your stupor. "well everyone, that's going to be all for y/n's motion of dance today! thank you so much for tuning in, love you!"
you wave goodbye for a few more moments and then shut off the broadcast, closing your laptop as soon as you do. you blink twice and suddenly let out a scream.
you stop with a gasp and cover your mouth with your hands because you cannot believe you forgot that your dance studio isn't the most soundproof of places. "sorry, other dance students..." you whisper to them but more for yourself.
taking a look around your escape, your passion, you can't believe you've made it to where you are, being praised as one of the top dancers on such a vast social media platform like youtube. if anything, you guess it runs in your family, after all, you are related to choi yeonjun, who is considered 4th gen's it boy.
though people were skeptical of you at first when you came on the youtube scene as a dancer after your older brother started taking more to modeling and acting, you quickly proved them wrong by showing them your talent and bloomed from then on. of course, you can't forget to mention the person who skyrocketed just around the same time as you.
and that was the aforementioned lee heeseung. you sigh as you finish packing up your clothes and things to head back to your dorm, glancing out the window to see the sun beginning to set. it seems today was a rare early finish for you.
"i could go for a coffee... i need to finish my classics essay anyway," you mumble to yourself, throwing your bag over your shoulder before hitting the showers and changing into a more casual set of clothes. the finishing touch is a baseball cap that sits snug on your head. tightening the strap on the back and grabbing your backpack and dance bag, you finally take your leave of your beloved dance studio and return the key on the way out. fresh air meets your face, allowing you to take a whiff of the cherry blossoms that have been blooming for a month or so as you make your way to the campus café.
ding ding, the coffee shop's calm doorbell welcomes you as your nose is hit by the sweet smells of freshly ground coffee beans. "welcome!" one of the servers calls at the counter, smiling at your figure that walks closer to order. "what can i get you?"
"hi, may i have..." you scan the menu quickly for a familiar drink. "a honey cinnamon iced latte please?"
"of course, name please?"
"choi y/n," you reply.
if they recognize you, they don't make any notion of it, simply scribbling your name on the plastic cup as you make your payment. you're grateful for the normal interaction and the peacefulness of the café, especially after a surprising stream. "i'll call you when your order's ready, choi y/n-ssi," they inform you with a warm grin.
"thank you," you smile back before going to find a seat. spotting a relatively private area close by with only a pair of boys sitting at the booth, you decide to take the booth two spaces away from them. one boy, you notice, sits taller than the other, but his face is covered by a baseball cap. the other looks like a freshman, his cheeks accentuated by a pair of deep dimples.
as you take your seat, you can't help but think the boy with dimples looks rather familiar but can't seem to place your finger on it. shrugging, you simply begin preparing to write your essay by taking out your laptop and notes from your classics ge. the moment you finish is when you hear your name being called.
"choi y/n-ssi, your honey cinnamon iced latte," the server's voice calls. on your way to receive your awaiting drink, you can finally hear the voices of the two boys sitting two booths down from you.
"did your crush just say choi y/n?" the one with the hat says.
'yes, that's me,' you think to yourself nonchalantly.
"weren't you just watching their stream, heeseung hyung?" another voice says as you pick up your latte and thank the server.
wait, heeseung? as in lee heeseung? it's when you turn around with your drink in hand that you notice the two males looking straight at you. now you're able to make out the features of the boy with the cap, and there's no mistaking it.
"lee heeseung?" you mutter out loud at the same time he speaks out yours.
well, maybe that wasn't what you were expecting today, but hey, life is full of surprises, even if they are one after the other for you. after that unexpected encounter, you and heeseung acquainted yourselves, he invited you to sit with them, and now you're sitting at their table, awkwardly sipping on your latte.
"right, so should i leave?" the other boy, who you found out is studytuber and vlogger yang jungwon (which is why he looked familiar to you), blurts out. you chuckle as heeseung shakes his shoulder lightly. "what? you two clearly have to talk about something, i need to study."
"yea, yea, lover boy. make sure you say bye to your crush on the way out," the male dancer teases, causing the younger one to turn bright red.
"don't call me that, hyung," he mutters before picking up his bag and leaving the booth. sure enough, you watch as jungwon passes by the counter and erupts into a nervous mess the moment the server beams at him.
"ah... so he likes them?" you think out loud.
"yup, it's been almost four months now. i'm the reason he even knows this cafe and that server exists," heeseung mentions, making you nod courteously. he turns his attention back to you with his hand placed under his chin. "but their relationship is besides the point. let's talk about us."
"d-did you have to put it that way?" the forwardness catches you off-guard, and you suddenly have a harder time swallowing a sip of your coffee.
"sorry," he says with a teasing smile. "i just think the collab i mentioned would be good for both of us, and it'll be really fun too."
"i agree, people who like you will come to me and vice versa," you nod. "but do you know what we would be dancing to?"
"so does that mean you're in?" he asks, smile starting to grow on his face. wordlessly, you roll your eyes and hold out your hand for him to shake. that's when his full smile comes out, causing your cheeks to heat up as you think about how much more handsome it makes him look. taking your hand, heeseung shakes it with his vigorously. "alright, dance partner, we have a deal."
after much deliberation and research, the two of you finally agree on troublemaker by the duo hyuna and hyunseung. heeseung suggested this song, stating that he always wanted to do the choreo with somebody and that it's destiny that both males have a name that starts with h and ends with seung. quite frankly, it's not like you could find much anyway, besides some cool music bank mc stages, it is cool that troublemaker was originally an opposite-gender duo in the korean entertainment industry.
the choreography however is an entirely different story. at many points, hyuna's body is touched by hyunseung and vice versa, but if they can do it and stay professional, then you believe you can too. besides, dancing will always be just dancing. heeseung also assures you that if you want, the two of you can just have your hands hovering, which makes you feel relieved to have an understanding partner.
hours pass by, and you and heeseung decide to meet at your usual dance studio daily after all your classes, which wasn't hard because he also frequented the same one.
"i still can't believe we attend the same university," you say aloud as the both of you pack up your laptops and supplies.
"i know right, you would think one of us would recognize the dance studio we go to 24/7, right?" he laughs. "although, i've seen you use a different one sometimes."
"do you really watch my covers and streams often?" you ask baffled. he and you wave the workers goodbye and make your way to the brisk evening air waiting outside as the staff sends you off.
"i do, is that so hard to believe?"
"a little," you reply sheepishly.
"well, let me walk you to your dorm and prove to you how much of a choi y/n stan i am," he boasts, and you let yourself laugh freely as you walk beside him to your destination.
it's strange, knowing a famous youtuber you watched also knew and followed you, but then again, you're not exactly nobody either. when heeseung drops you off, he admits that he actually lives a few floors above you and that you two can walk home together after each rehearsal. it's even stranger, knowing a famous youtuber literally has been on your campus, in the same dorm building as you, and this whole time, the two of you have both been clueless as to the other's existence as an ordinary college student.
speaking of which, he can't be a dance major, right? otherwise, you would've already seen him! these thoughts keep you tossing and turning to the point you don't register when you fell asleep. when you wake up, you feel as if you didn't get any sleep at all, but get up and ready nevertheless, going through another regular day as a dance major.
by the time your classes are over, you walk out of the studio yawning about to stop by your dorm to freshen up and maybe fit in a nap. you're holding a hand over your mouth mid-yawn when a voice starts talking to you.
"good thing i stopped by to get coffee." you open your eyes and close your mouth to see lee heeseung holding two cups of coffee. he's dressed in an oversized white shirt and grey sweatpants, a common dance practice outfit, so why is your heart skipping so many beats. "yo, choi y/n."
"heeseung," you say, still shocked. he hands you the coffee, which is actually the same flavor you got yesterday. "thanks."
"no problem," he replies coolly. "maybe we should take a break before we get to it?"
"i'll be fine, how about we can start watching the choreo?"
"they're always ready to dance," he nods with an impressed smile. "as expected of a dance major."
the two of you walk inside and book a studio for a few hours as you raise an eyebrow at him. "wait, what major are you?"
"music production."
"that makes so much sense!" you say relieved, stepping into the studio room for the umpteenth time. "i was racking my brains wondering what major you were."
"so the famous choi y/n is curious about me?" he smirks. you groan and facepalm in response. "i'm kidding, i'm kidding. let's watch the video on my tablet?"
nodding, the two of you watch carefully, eyes glued to the screen at your respective roles. you hold your breath at some touchy parts but also notice that both idols were able to shine in their solos.
"a few tweaks here and there, and it'll be perfect," heeseung comments once the video is over. "but let's go over some boundaries, yeah? let me know what you're comfortable with and what you're not."
"right," you agree, once again relieved to have such a safe and understanding partner like him. "well, i think i'm okay with you touching my arms, shoulders, and hips like hyunseung did to hyuna. i just need some time to get used to it."
"alright, that sounds good," he says nodding with a hand under his chin. "then for today, i'll just hover my hands over the places they need to be."
"what a gentleman," you tease.
he rolls his eyes playfully at you. "let's start marking."
and so that's what the two of you start on. with the video on the tablet, you go through the motions with the speed lowered, eventually picking up more moves until you're able to follow at the normal speed. as expected of the top two dancers on youtube, the two of you are quick on observing and learning the dance and get done with basic marking within 20 minutes or so.
after marking, you take a quick water break to watch the video again in full detail, officially beginning your first real practice. as promised, throughout the entirety of marking, heeseung has kept his hands to himself, but you've become comfortable enough to have him do a little more.
before you start practicing for real, you decide to speak with him. "hee," you call him as he puts down his water bottle.
"hm?" he confirms that you have his attention, looking up with his large doe-like eyes while wiping his mouth off from some excess water.
"uhm.." you fidget with your top a little before mustering up some courage. "you can do light touches now for the choreo."
"really? are you sure?" you nod at his question, causing him to come up to you and ruffle your hair lightly. you bat his hands away with a pout, smoothing out the mess he made as he laughs at you. "that's great, y/n," he says with a bright smile, unknowingly making your heart beat a little faster as you nod again. in your head, you rush to cover up the physical reaction with an excuse that it's just from the amount of exercise you've done.
the two of you stand in front of the mirror, ready to go. before the music starts, heeseung turns to you and says, "just let me know if i make you uncomfortable at all."
"i'll be fine," you reassure him with a small smile. that's when the song begins, and the sparks start to fly. every move flowed like water, yet every touch between the two of you was like electricity as if the two elements were working together instead of fighting. even though the touches are light, they still put chills up your spine, in a way that you can only describe with the phrase "meant to happen."
was fate moving its course to put this match together, or were you imagining it? you're not sure, but you grin while catching your breath once the first practice is over. falling to the floor softly, you sit with your hands splayed behind you and let out a relieved sigh. "ahh... dancing is so... great!"
heeseung chuckles at your reaction and offers a hand to get you up. "i'm glad you think that because we got a lot more practice ahead of us, partner."
"yup!" you say with a widening smile. the moment you took his hand, you felt an electric jolt that almost made you let go. getting up, you shake it off and barely catch the expression on your dance partner's face. "is something the matter?"
he blinks a bit before he's shaking his head with that charming smirk of his. "nope! let's practice!"
practice, practice, practice. that's how the next few hours go. and just like the day before, heeseung walks you to your dorm building, this time the conversation about how excited the two of you are for the recording.
that's basically how the next four or so days go, now that heeseung came into your life. your daily routine of wake up, eat, class, dance, repeat was shaken by him, because now he was a part of it. it's an indescribable feeling, hanging out with him. the best word, or phrase actually, is the same one you used while dancing with him: meant to be.
so when you finally get to the day of recording, you almost don't want it to end. at least, that's what you're telling your best friend and makeup artist, kim sunoo.
"friend, you're telling me that you and this guy have been following along to..." he tells you to look up as he curls your eyelashes. "a dance like that for four days and you've been getting shocks this whole time?"
"i mean, yeah?"
"y/n, i love you, but you're missing a little something, aren't you?"
"wha-!?"
"pucker up, sweetie, we're making your lips look kissable," sunoo commands. you do an eye-roll but do as he says. "if you don't ask him out or do something by the end of this, you can at least kiss your best shot at a boyfriend goodbye with luscious lips."
he finishes applying the color and asks you to rub your lips together and make that pop sound. "perfect," your best friend compliments. "go out there and get your mans."
"thank you, sunoo!" you say, gazing at your reflection in the mirror and loving the way he accentuated your features. "by the way, you're all talk. you should ask your celebrity crush out when they appear on your channel."
"i'll get there when i get there!" he whines and starts pushing you out of his dorm room. "just go get 'em, tiger."
with that, you make your way to the dance studio where heeseung is waiting for you, dressed in hyunseung's iconic suit with the leopard-patterned blazer. your heart quickens, seeing how much more handsome he looks dressed up, hair slicked back and some makeup done. he looks up upon hearing the door open and his mouth slightly hangs open as well.
the both of you are silent as you approach him, in your equally bedazzling outfit, sheer to mimic hyuna's stage dress. "you look amazing," the two of you say at the same time. stunned at the simultaneous sentence, you two immediately start guffawing at how this was unlike your usual interactions.
"that was so awkward!" you blurt out, unable to contain your laughter.
"yea, not like us at all," he admits while he wipes a stray tear from laughing too hard away. smiling at each other, you admire the way his eyes reflect your image and sparkle. "you ready to get this show on the road."
"ready as i'll ever be." the two of you get into your positions on the opposite ends of the room, and heeseung starts the camera and the music soon after. you take each step slowly to meet him in the middle as he takes your hand and brings it up to his lips to give it a kiss while smirking. you keep your face professional as the two of you take a few steps forward, the back of his fingers curled over the front of yours.
starting back-to-back, you walk forward a bit before the beat drops and heeseung's part begins. you're on autopilot as you dance your fingers from his chest to his shoulders, and then the chorus comes. hips swaying, you're able to feel his hands' light taps on your body as the two of you lose yourself to the music you've danced to hundreds of times this week.
then, it's your killing part as you lipsync hyuna's rap and take bold steps around heeseung's body, ending up behind him to bring your hands over his shoulders and make a scratching movement across his chest. you step towards his side, do your thing, and walk away as if playing hard to get.
you wait for his part during the bridge and make a side glance towards him before moving towards him and performing the hip-heavy part of the chorus together. your partner moves his face up along your arm, taking it in like you're a statue. you then act like you brush him away when heeseung gets close enough. after this second chorus, you're leaving him to do his big solo, watching carefully as he makes his every move precise and crisp yet flow well.
it's the last chorus now, and this time, you can't take your eyes off each other as you finally face one another. you stay drowning in his shades of brown without a single misstep until you have to walk away from him. you wait for him to come towards you, back slightly turned away as he jaunts forward, making his way to be captured by your hand behind his neck.
the last breath of the song is the one where you're supposed to turn your head away as his own chases yours, but this time, you brave forward and lean in close. the music fades away, but all you hear is his breathing, feeling it against your own.
you stay like this, ensnared in each other's arms, forgetting about everything except the person wrapped close to you as you feel his every breath against your lips and every inhale and exhale under your hand. he searches your eyes, looking for some kind of sign. "do you mind if i—"
that was all you needed before you're pressing your lips against his. it only takes seconds for him to kiss you back, moving his hands from their previous position on your hips to hold your face. becoming breathless from dancing was one thing, becoming breathless from kissing heeseung was another thing entirely, it was in a league of its own you note as you pull away and rest your forehead on his.
"we'll have to edit that out," you say after what seemed like ages of taking each other in while chuckling.
"i have a better idea than editing."
"oh, and what's that, handsome?"
"look at you getting all bold, troublemaker," heeseung replies with that smile of his. he shakes his head, moving away from you and taking your hand in his. "how about we go on our first official date as youtube's top dancer couple?"
"that does sound like a better idea," you agree, your own smile widening.
"then let's make it happen, sweetheart."
bonus! - click for full images
taglist: @cha-raena @imjustme-things @misoiishi @rikitaiyaki send an ask to join the taglist! :3c permanent taglist: @fiantomartell
a/n: wow this was a long one!! i'm not sure if i detailed all the movements well, but i hope you all enjoyed it nevertheless <3
#enhypen#enhypen x reader#enhypenwriters#lee heeseung x reader#lee heesseung fluff#enhypen imagines#enhypen fluff#enhypen scenarios#enhypen oneshots#lee heeseung imagines#enhypen heeseung#captured on camera#this came out more detailed than i thought it would be JFAIJFA
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ORIGINS SMP HEADCANONS (because i love them): SEASON TWO EDITION BAYBEEE
(this is really long ENJOY :gun:)
tommy
he is phil's son smile
phil's most recent son at least
he's got like one more somewhere
he picked this one up off the dangerous streets a few years ago and he's been sticking with phil ever since
his wings are small- not too small to fly, but they're untrained to the point where it would take a lot or work to get him off the ground
but at first, he didn't really seem to want to learn all that much?
(he has three scars on his face- all from trying to learn how to fly when he was younger)
(he gave up after the third one)
("if at first you don't succeed; try, try again" is his motto, and he tried all three times)
but!! phil and wilbur are very persuasive :) and now that he knows he can fly, he's not going to rest until he does
he's a little manipulative to get what he wants sometimes, but can you blame someone that lived on the street for so long?
he had to do that to survive! it's not his fault.
(it's a great excuse.)
he laughs like a kookaburra amen
he squawks when he gets scared
he chirps. he tries not to because it makes phil go absolutely bird-brained but he does sometimes and he hates it.
tubbo
NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A B[GUNSHOTS]
god he is. so fucking annoying (/rp)
he simply does not know when to stop
he ignores social cues to see when someone is annoyed
(see: he can read social cues. he does read social cues. when you get annoyed that's when he starts being more annoying, because you're more likely to give him what he wants to get him to shut the fuck up.)
he loves talking to (at) people, especially people he doesn't really know that well
so he's trying to be friends with ranboo, but the absolute prick keeps trying to avoid any actual conversations, so that's not working
he buzzes when he gets excited-happy
his fingertips are completely blackened and horrendously sharp, functioning as ten individual stingers
they don't do any actual damage but he's working on that
techno
wither hybrid (??)
how can you be a wither hybrid?? nobody got down and dirty with the wither
he's an experiment
the reason we haven't seen him yet? he's staying away from the main area of the smp
he doesn't want to ruin its natural beauty with his withering effect, so he keeps to himself on the outskirts of the smp
which sucks
withers get health from killing things
he's not fully a wither, so he gets energy from being around people and sort of draining their life force a little bit
he feels terrible when he's with just one person because they are Literally his life support and it makes the person feel like shit
when he's with a big group of people its great!! he only has to take a little bit from everyone and its barely noticable!!
but then there's the wither part. so he has to stay away.
he's always tired
always exhausted
he's a farmer, so taking it from animals works, but god does he miss people
but he can only visit a few times and for very short
(he's afraid that one of these days he'll get so bad that the next time he sees someone he'll accidentally kill them)
(it already happened once. he's blessed that he's been forgiven, even made friends with by the victims, but he doubts he'll be able to pull that off again with no consequences like last time)
wilbur
phantlings are dead elytrians, and given that wilbur was phil's son...he's a phantling
he died in the late 50s and was a librarian when he was alive, so he's very possessive (ha) over all of his things
you should never ask to "borrow" anything from him, he will hound you about it until you give it back
it's best to just say that you want something from him to keep
even if youre going to give it back
just for your own peace of mind
phantlings can feel fear and get a genuine feeling of elation from scaring people
of course, sometimes its unwelcome (feeling large amounts of fear from someone they care about in a bad way just makes them pissed)
but for the most part, wilbur loves appearing in the corner of people's visions just to jumpscare them a few minutes later
all in good fun, of course!! it's just hilarious :)
being the lighthearted, fun guy he is, he's not particularly secretive about his method of death
"how did i die? well, it all started -- ended -- on november 16th, 1958!"
"i walked out of the library late, since i took the shift for my wife since she was feeling sick and i worked there anyways,"
"the streets were dark and only lit up by gaslamps...and out of an alley...appeared..........."
techno.
he didn't mean it. wilbur isn't at all mad at him (anymore)
he was starving. he didn't know that one touch would be enough to fully revitalize him...
and murder wilbur where he stood.
sneeg
has details on everyone on the server
you Cannot Hide Shit From Sneeg
its impossible
if you find of his any shittly little mouse holes then you're doomed
you find one and there are twenty more
he's under your floorboards while you're having your important discussion about trapping the nether roof
sucks to suck ig??
he seems to be the favourite of many, which is weird since he rarely goes out of his way to actually talk to many people
he's the only person that tubbo doesn't actively try to annoy (or maybe he just doesn't find tubbo's antics all that annoying)
he's the only person that ranboo stays around (or maybe he stays around ranboo- he and Phil seem to be the only ones not off-put by his slightly sadistic and whiny demeanour (not counting tubbo, who annoys him anyways)
phil seems to be more protective of him than he thinks is normal (he lets sneeg ride on his shoulder while travelling, so he doesn't really complain)
niki is completely protective over him (again, not complaining)
contrary to popular believe, he does not get high from sugar
if anything he gets
high-per
(get it)
(high-per)
(hyper)
he's literally just a nine-year old getting a sugar rush leave him alone
phil
take the normal "bird-brain" headcanons and multiply it by like sixty-four
and you've got origins phil
he can't see glass- or, rather, he can, but it doesn't register that 'hey, this is a solid surface i am going to slam into'
its very funny for everyone else but he's pretty sure he has permanent brain damage from the blunt force trauma
if there is ANYONE on the server who dares to chirp, bird or no, they must understand that they are signing away their privacy and giving phil the right to go absolutely bonkers over them momma bird style
(shoutout to tommy, wilbur, ranboo, and fundy for having to suffer through this)
"oh??? you don't have wings?? you don't have feathers?? omg?? then what's this im preening?? what do you mean im just braiding your hair?? nono this is preening smile"
god help you if you dare to have wings
poor tommy, wilbur, sneeg, and tubbo
phil can't help himself alright
do you think he wants to be any sort of protective over sneegsnag?
no!! but he cant stop himself!! sneeg might damage his wings if he keeps flying those super long distances!!! nnnno! carry the bug man!!!
it's weird, he's always had that protective sense over ranboo, too
but ranboo very obviously doesn't have wings, so he doesn't get it...
ranboo
yes ur a peasant
yes ur poor
yes im cooler than u
what r u gonna do about it
the enderdragon's son! partially a dragon, partially enderman, partially human (don't ask, his other mom is a hybrid), all spoiled brat!
given that he has a ton of dragon genes, he's extremely possessive over his stuff and Yes He Does Do The Hoarding Thing
he has a pile of rings and gold chains and necklaces and most of his jewellery hidden underneath his bed
(if you ask him, no, he doesn't)
not to wear
just to Have
one time, fundy stole one (1) bracelet from the hoard and ranboo was sent into a panic for a good 24 hours
he wouldn't leave his cave and kept counting and recounting as if that'd make the missing piece reappear
(when fundy had to give it back because of the guilt, he expected to get his face bitten off)
(instead, he just watched as the prince was flooded with relief, telling him to get the hell out and nothing more)
it's weird, he has so much gold and even a crown, and yet here he is
living with all those people ^^^
truth be told, the enderdragon isn't a very nice dragon
nor is she a very kind queen
nor was the other queen
nor was her son
there was a mutiny in the end, leading to the dragon queen and her wife being killed brutally by the crowd of angered people
they went after their son next, who had ordered executions and worked servants to the bone just as much as they had
they cut off his wings in the middle of the square
he was sure he was going to die until a random person (a peasant) jumped up and yelled at them for publicly torturing a child
but ranboo didn't really catch all of it, given he was delirious from pain
he got to get some stuff quickly and escape with his life
this wasn't too long ago, either, so he's still trying to...adjust...to people talking rudely to him
(he's also trying to adjust to not having wings)
(hence why he hurls himself off the edges of cliffs and then has to teleport to the bottom instead of glide. he keeps forgetting.)
#this is so long#origins smp#originssmp#ranboo#tubbo#philza#philza minecrft#sneegsnag#wilbur soot#technoblade#tommyinnit#help this is so long
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Watch Dogs Legion - "My Moron"
["Forgive me for the intrusion..."] Bagley's terminal flickers to life, his avatar appearing above it. ["...but judging by your posture and your frankly outrageous alcohol intake over the last few hours...I'd say something is bothering you."] "Smartest AI in the country." Wrench mutters, staring at the bottle in his right hand. "We've got him right here...underneath a bar in Westminster." ["Sarcastic Humor."] Bagley states. ["The deflection mechanism of fools who regret their life choices. I should know, I was one of them at one time."] "Look..." Wrench suddenly looks up at the terminal, breathing out. "I'm not in the mood for company right now...so if you wouldn't mind...fucking off to wherever it is you go late at night." ["A thousand apologies."] Bagley replies. ["I'll just install myself in the nearest spider bot and scuttle off to Buckingham Palace for tea with Her Majesty shall I?"] "Whatever." Wrench squeezes his eyes shut, taking a swig from his beer and sitting back on the couch. "I don't care. Just shut up and leave me alone." ["Unfortunately I cannot."] Bagley says, a momentary glitch occurring in his speech processors that could have been a sigh if he had lungs. ["As I am rooted through this basement. Also I was here first, so check yourself before you tell me to fuck off."] "I seriously don't have the fucks to give in order to be angry at you right now." Wrench sighs, rubbing at his forehead with the palm of his left hand. "It's just another pain in my ass that I don't need." ["Then might I inquire as to what has gotten you so down?"] Bagley asks, a noticeable lilt of knowing entering his voice. ["Could it be those voice messages that you recorded and have yet to send?"] Wrench opens his eyes again, glaring at the holographic avatar in-front of him. He sits upright. "You hacked my phone?" ["No."] Bagley states. ["I am your phone...and all 27 million above. Or did you forget I'm running on almost every device in this country? Except Scotland...Savages."] A small pause occurs before he speaks again. ["What's stopping you?"] "..." Wrench stares at his terminal. "...I...don't know." He sits back, deflating again. "I guess I'm just a pussy." ["No you're more of a porcupine."] Bagley comments. ["The spikes, both literal as well as figurative. How do people give you hugs?"] "They don't." ["Marcus does."] Another pause. ["From what I've gathered...he's a reasonable person."] he continues. ["Not prone to any sudden mood swings like yourself."] "Exactly." Wrench gestures obviously with his left hand. "He's reasonable enough to know that what I have to say is pointless. That even if we both really tried, it would be doomed to failure and disappointment. That's why I didn't send them. Are you happy now?" ["Not even remotely."] Bagley states. ["Believe it or not, I was human once. You already know that. And I went through a similar...situation to yours."] "Well I hope you did better than me." Wrench shakes his head, placing the beer to the side as his stomach turns. "Because at this point, I just have to accept that some things just aren't supposed to happen." ["Actually I did much worse than you."] Bagley replies. ["But that doesn't matter in the long run. You know why?"] "...enlighten me?" Wrench rolls his eyes, expecting some sort of sarcastic or witty remark. "Because he's running on every device in this country." a voice suddenly says out of the silence, making Wrench near enough jump out of his skin. Marcus holds up his phone in his right hand. "...including mine." "You son of a bitch." Wrench looks at Bagley's avatar, before suddenly standing up. "You called him down here!? Are you out of out of your fucking mind!?" ["I just did you a favor, Reginald."] Bagley replies. ["Now why don't you two have a little chat whilst I run another maintenance cycle."] "Oh no you don't-!" Wrench yells, only for the terminal to go dark and the servers around them to tick off into stand-by mode. He kicks the side of it's casing, cursing when all he gets is a sore
foot. "Fuck!" Turning to face Marcus, he wishes a thousand hells upon the AI. "He sent you those messages, didn't he?" "He did." Marcus nods slowly, his face was passive, but there was definitely a weight in his eyes. "How long?" "I'm sorry about that." Wrench sits back down, reaching under his hood and pulling it back, running his hands through his hair. "He's a fucking dick for sending those to-" "-How long, Reggie?" Marcus asks again. "Just...answer me. Please." Wrench finds what strength he can in the moment to look him directly in the eye. "...since before I left SF." Marcus breathes out quietly, reaching up to his face and pulling off his glasses. His head rolls back and he pinches at the bridge of his nose. "That was nine years ago." "Yeah." Wrench replies, staring at him. He wasn't sure if he was about to charge at him or start crying. Either one wasn't worth thinking about. "...I know." "Why didn't you tell me?" He suddenly looks at him again, stepping forwards. "What part of you thought that I would have any problems with that? You know for a fact that I swing both ways like you." "I didn't-" Wrench stutters, finding that he was speechless, which wasn't new to him, just rare. "You were- There was a lot going on with-" He goes quiet as Marcus stops just in-front of him. He reaches forwards and places a hand on his left shoulder. Before suddenly bringing it across his left cheek. Wrench flinches at the smack, his whole body erupting in shivers, along with the sharp stinging pain on his face. Slowly but sure he looks the Hipster in the eye again. "..." "You're a fucking moron." Marcus says, lowering himself down onto one knee. He takes a hold of his right hand with his left, the other caressing the red spot on his cheek where he'd smacked him. "...you know that?" Before Wrench can respond with anything, he's pulled into a hug. It draws the breath out of him, all of the tension he was feeling releasing in an instant. "But you're my moron." Marcus says, his head resting on his shoulder. . . . (I'm very tired and very gay. Please be gentle with me. ;-;)
#watch dogs legion#reggie blechman#bagley#wrench#marcus holloway#wrencus#i wrote this instead of sleeping#as usual#is this any good?#stories
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Always Shine and Redefine Our Humanity
How Eret Contributes to the Dream SMP's Narrative Themes of Change and Self-Discovery
I can’t believe listening to a song from a fairly obscure but growing musical (where I took this post’s title from) would prompt me to inspect Eret’s character more but here we are. I will heavily use @theeretblr's (whom you should subscribe to, btw) Character Explanation thread as a basis, as well as statements about their character from their most recent streams and things that I have gathered from other essays by people who clearly have been watching from the start.
This will include sentiments and theories I want for the character because I kinda got attached to them as of late. Please keep in mind that I have been watching since around Late November-Early December, so my biases would be appropriate to such a viewer.
This essay is a discussion of the roleplay character.
1. Eret is Self-Preserving & Versatile in Skill (and this is why they're powerful)
"Those who are given Power hold on to it."
Something I’ve observed concerning Eret’s Betrayal of L’Manburg was their motivations for doing so. For a time they have believed that power and security mattered. For a time their interests went first. CC!Eret referred to the choice as "an offer no one would refuse" as well. This wasn't just luxury and (they didn't know it at the time, but false) power, it was the protection they would be allowed to have by the admin of the server. It was being allowed to do whatever they wanted, despite the means to it being dishonorable and interestingly enough, demanding of permission.
Eret was willing to do anything to remain secure and equipped, and I argue that they still do until now. The difference is that now, they are more concerned about how they maintain their security in that they wouldn't hurt other people or be extremely unethical in the pursuit of this security.
Also, they're privy to grinding when it's necessary, they know how to build structure and contraption, and they can hold their own fairly well. They're very well-spoken and can deliver on appearances and ambiance, excellent at both comforting and intimidating whomever they choose. They had to have been this skilled for a while.
2. Eret has a Forgotten History (of bringing down powerful groups of people, apparently)
"Those who don't know History are doomed to repeat it."
So remember that interaction with Foolish? I want to bring this up because I feel that having particularly close ties with a God of Undying/Death has implications.
Foolish also brings up "taking care of [a] Wither cult"—an organized group! Wasn't Eret known for taking down an organized group on the server? L'Manburg, at its founding. He was part of the rebellion against Manburg. He was against the Eggpire. Yep, that's a pattern.
What does this mean? Well:
Eret's hands were never clean from the start, clearly before the Final Control room, and it can be inferred that they're redder than they seem
Eret's tendencies towards self-preservation may have been influenced/learned from Foolish
Eret may have had (if they still don't do) an inclination to pursue power through the dismantling of organized groups that also seek/already have established power
Eret's current skills are the way they are due to his past
And we cannot forget the CC confirmation that c!Eret has relations with Herobrine, the infamous Minecraft urban legend known for the horror he brings and how many lovers of Minecraft frame him as this terrifying powerhouse entity beyond human comprehension. This relation is still a mystery, but from what we know, it can tell us a lot about what Eret has forgotten about himself and what Eret is capable of!
3. Eret is Concerned by What People (though only those that matter to him) Think of Her
"I think Respect is a big thing."
In light of her power, we have to remember that Eret regretted pursuing power upon recognizing the loss of respect and friendship that came with the throne. This becomes a much stronger detriment when she realizes that the power she thought she had never actually existed in the first place—one can say she would dread pursuing power for herself again. To subject oneself to the standards of others after all is to subject yourself under constant scrutiny.
In her regrets, she learns and realizes what she wants—to be loved and cared for, to be truly alive with her loved ones. It's why she decides to improve herself, and she works and makes the effort to try! She struggled (and still does) in the process of pursuing forgiveness, illustrating that her determination towards an end is very strong, gradual as it may be.
It's how she looks up to Wilbur! Still! I reckon the two believe they're responsible for the other. Change! What an incredible thing the two are able to do.
4. Eret Knows What He Wants (but is struggling to figure out how to get it)
"That was a long time ago. I've changed things and I know not to break people's trust anymore."
One of Eret’s biggest concerns right now in Season 3 is his relationship with the Crown, mixed and fickle it seems based on his streams during this time. His kingship carries more and more weight each passing day, debating whether forgoing the effort and spilled blood Eret had to get the Crown is worth it. (I mean, he accepted the restoration of his Kingship when George got dethroned.)
The Kingship is still power, and it's become true power after Dream had been put in prison. We know he's admitted being deathly afraid of Dream, so this period of genuine Kingship would be incredibly special to him. Ever since he's been finding ways to make his kingship genuinely meaningful, redefining the evils the Crown used to have by doing good to whomever sincerely, freely, and willingly. He's attempted allyhood with like-minded individuals based on his judgment of their character. Remember his Knights? These consisted of HBomb, Puffy, and Punz, each of which exhibited behaviors (predilection for community, dedication to duty, moral neutrality) he has as well!
But yet, the blood spilled for that Crown still stains him, and it cannot be denied that it will continue to do so for as long as Eret wears the crown. I wonder if he believes this, whether a part of him does deep down. Dream being in jail doesn't just mean freedom to be a king but freedom to quite literally be yourself, whatever it may be.
5. For these reasons, Eret Represents Constant Self-Actualization and Rediscovery
"I'm a strong, independent...whatever the fuck I am."
Given the points established above, Eret is unfamiliar with her full self and wants to shape herself into someone desirable and genuinely contributing kindness to a clearly broken world, a world whose brokenness she also happened to contribute to.
Her enthusiasm for History and the pursuit of enlightenment speaks volumes to this motivation. It's her repeated, dedicated efforts to try and try and try and try, to be better! Not just to be a better person herself but for everyone else to be able to be better too! She's aware that perfection is impossible, but clearly recognizes that constant reevaluation of the self is nonetheless necessary.
It's how she's open to engaging with as many people as possible despite differing opinions and carried baggage. She researches and explores and examines! She does no harm but takes no shit.
Every facet of her, to the terror her eyes have been known to give, to the air of affirmation radiating in her domain of a Pride castle, to the blood that decorates her fingers, to the people she has given support to, to the people she has disadvantaged, to the History she keeps, to the part of herself she no longer remembers, to the power she carries—Eret knows how to be truly alive.
#hey eret if you're reading this feel free to respond in any way you can (especially if i get something wrong!)#dream smp#dream smp analysis#dream smp theory#eret#the_eret#eretblr#long post
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This is the second analysis and summary of Tommy’s prison stay with Dream
You can read through the first one here. Dialogue is color-coded: Tommy, Dream.
Streams: Tommy's Trapped In Prison with Dream, Tommy's Final Canon Death on Dream SMP
It has now been a week since TNT started going off in the prison, and Tommy sings Roadtrip and makes noises to annoy and make fun of Dream, which is not new behavior from Tommy. There is a new guest in the cell this time; it is a cat. The cat was Tommy’s and it was originally sitting outside the hotel. We actually see this cat in the prison stream before this one. How or why the cat is here now isn’t known. Tommy thinks he’s annoying, while Dream thinks that it’s the best thing that ever happened to them. Tommy calls the cat Pussboy. Tommy hits the cat, and Dream immediately retaliates. Tommy makes more mouth noises to annoy Dream, and he says that this behavior has gone on since Tommy got stuck. Dream once again says that the cat was the best thing that ever happened to them. Tommy still has no attachment or feels much of anything other than disgust toward the cat. Sam begins to speak after this, which grabs Tommy’s attention. Tommy says that it has been 19 days, but Sam says that he’s wrong. Sam gives them more food but says that Tommy can’t leave yet. Tommy pleads with Sam for a while, but he gets nowhere. Eventually, we get this:
“You remember when you visited me in exile, Sam? Alright? This is worse than that, Sam. Let me out. I don’t like this.”
We, the audience, have not seen all the time Tommy and Dream spent together, however, this is a big hint of what it was like for Tommy. Exile was absolutely horrible, to put it lightly. He was physically, emotionally, and mentally abused so badly that he wanted to commit suicide. For Tommy to say that it was worse means a lot here. After this and some more yelling, Sam leaves. Tommy opens a book and begins to write while Dream explains that this is not that bad. The book just says that Dream is ugly, bad, and has a massive ego. He signs the book and gives it to Dream to read, and Dream throws it in the lava. Dream suggests that he and Tommy should get out together, and Tommy declines. Tommy directs his attention to Pussboy, saying that he’s in the way and hits him repeatedly. Dream gets in front of Pussboy to push Tommy away. Tommy right clicks on Pussboy to make him move. He asks if Dream likes Pussboy, and Dream says yes. Dream says he loves Pussboy after Tommy asks, and eventually, Tommy hits the cat enough for it to die. Right after it dies, Tommy says,
“Yeah, and that’s what happens when you love something, bitch.”
This is a lesson that Dream has taught Tommy before. Whatever he loves will be taken from him in some way, and that the people he loves will die. It is the lesson that attachment is a weakness and a detriment. Tommy proved that the lesson was wrong during the Disc War Finale, but now, Tommy has flipped the script, and Dream is the one receiving this lesson. Dream says that he will get out, and Tommy only motivates him to do so. He says the cat represented hope, and Tommy immediately butted in to say that the hope was now dead.
Dream says that once he gets out, he’ll get his revenge. Tommy believes that Dream will kill Tubbo if he’s let out, which causes Tommy to hit Dream and yell at him. After some more arguing, Dream asks Tommy,
“How am I any more evil than you are?”
Dream believes that he and Tommy are two sides of the same coin. He truly thinks that he and Tommy are on an equal playing field when it comes to morality, which is not true. Dream cannot differentiate himself from Tommy, so whenever Tommy reacts differently from how he does, he is confused and upset by it. He cannot fathom the fact that Tommy is his own person.
Dream rants about how Tommy’s whining has been annoying and how this has not been that bad. He says that he’s been in the prison for much longer, so he does not see why Tommy is complaining. He says they have each other and used to have a cat, so it’s not that bad. He says that he will get out to get revenge, and a favor might have something to do with it. This is more proof that Dream has not grown or changed since entering the prison. He wants revenge, not to make amends. Tommy responds with this:
“You don’t have me. You’ll never have me. We don’t have each other, alright? I am me, and you are this fucking loser that goes around manipulating people… When I am going to leave here, you’re not!”
Again, this is Tommy trying to assert dominance in the situation. He is trying to remove himself from Dream, and he does not want Dream to think that he has anyone to help him, whether it’s in the prison or outside it. Dream says that he has something Techno would want. Later, he says this,
“Even when I’m in here, I’m more powerful than you are when you’re outside.”
This is true when it comes to Tommy. Despite the fact that Dream has been locked up for a while now, Tommy still feels unhappy. There is no immediate danger, but the fact that Dream causes Tommy to be fearful despite not being around him is proof of Dream’s power and Tommy’s victimhood. This also proves that Dream knows exactly how Tommy works, and he knows how to use that to his advantage.
Tommy ignores this statement, however, and explains that Dream is only alive for the revive book. Dream says that he will never use it to help Tommy or his friends. Dream threatens Tommy to kill him over this. Dream explains that the only way he’d use the revive book for Tommy is if he’s let out, using Tubbo as an example. Tommy says that he actually doesn’t believe that this is worse than exile. He acknowledges that he does not like the situation that he’s in, but he believes that he has some power. He does not believe that the revive book is real. He calls Dream a clinical manipulator over past events like the beach party and the destruction of the community house. Dream notes that Tommy is disrespectful, annoying, and overly accusatory while punching him. Tommy responds with,
“... I see a sad, little man who is insecure about the fact that this server has gotten so far ahead of him and his only little glimpse of power in this world is gone.” … “Tommy, your life is literally in my hands… You can’t kill me! I might as well be a god, Tommy! You can’t kill me, but I can kill you! If you can’t kill me, does that make me some kind of god?”
The ability to revive or keep people dead has sent Dream on a huge power trip now that he’s realized how much revival or lack of means to Tommy. He believes that he is god-like and above others. Tommy is unable to have the upper hand in this situation because Dream is so incredibly delusional. It is basically useless to fight with Dream under these circumstances, and Dream physically has the upper hand. Tommy is beaten to death by Dream. This is what causes Tommy’s death: a god complex, delusion, and obsession.
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Thoughts about the fifth season (spoilers)
Okay, so normally I would make these posts as neutral as possible because I want them to reach anyone who enjoys the show. Even if you are someone that really fucking hates incest ships you can read them and still have an idea of what I liked, what didn’t, etc, without me bringing up that element. You can disagree or agree without being reminded “oh, yeah, he is one of THOSE fans I don’t like” and that is totally fine by me. Curate your own online experience and all that. But this is season is quite literally about the relationship between Rick and Morty, so as a rickmorty shipper I just can’t separate that from what I enjoyed about it and thus I am going to be talking from that position during all of this. If that makes you uncomfortable, that is cool, I get it. You can skip this one if you want. Also, this is going to be a general big mess of thoughts and whatever because I have lots of them so, bear with me. -Some of the shippers I was with on a server will know this already, but from the very first episode I was sure we were going to have two major themes: 1. Rick is a flawed human being, not a god, not a ultra genius who is always destined to be on top of everything and knows how to get out of any situation. Just a man. And that is why he needs other people, which is somethig he had to accept and understand about himself, especially after the fourth season was all about dethroning him as the patriarch of the family and break away the illusions that Beth had about her own father. We have standed too long having Rick win on everything and coming out like a badass, so it’s time to kick him down a bit and let him lose. 2. Morty’s heart is always going to get fucked over, which is something that gets even more explored on the Planetina episode: he wants a place to belong with a person who doesn’t make him feel like the odd one out. Combine the two and my idea was: they want to assure us about their relationship on some kind of way, this is about them and what they feel regarding each other. Probably about why or how Rick became so jaded because why else include Rick freaking out about Mr Nimbus just mentioning Diane’s name and how much he changed, on a first episode no less, if this isn’t something we are setting up to see later. They explicitely brought someone from Rick’s past to talk about that past and make a point to tell us that changed Rick. -So, we have the two major player set up like this: on one hand, Morty aspires for that companionship but he is not willing to compromise his own moral for it, whatever he has left after starting to take on some Rick’s traits. He is desperate for that connection and if that means leaving Rick behind, so be it. Rick will still be there anyway. On othe other hand, Rick also wants that connection and companionship but it’s too disfunctional and can’t make it quite work because there is always a part of him that wants to keep distance. With the alien lady, evne with the crows, it’s all about escapism and pretend like everything is fine, it’s just fun and he doesn’t have to care because they are just having a good time together. He tried to do that too with BP by keeping away the info about his daughter, but he called his bluff because BP knew Rick too much to not see that comic. It’s rebound after rebound because he is missing the one person that can keep him in check, that truly knows what a piece of fucking shit he is and somehow still comes back to him. BP saw that, knew what was happening, and prefered to get the fuck away because he didn’t want to compromise his own values like that either. But Rick doesn’t have that problem with Morty. It truly is Rick and Morty one hundread years because, no matter how fucking bad it gets, they still choose one another. -Now, the way they keep building up this relationship, these connection, even regarding the rest of the family, to me is brilliant in restrospect because it perfectly illustrate how much they have changed from what they were before and what that means. Morty is more independent and less afraid, right, but that doesn’t make him more happier because he is still lonely and Rick is being reminded, over and over again, that he can’t be alone either. -Regarding the way Morty have behaved, I have seen some people being concerned about how Morty is becoming more independent and therefore not relying on Rick as much for anything, so it’s like what is the point of their relationship anymore. And like, to me it makes sense they show because they have already told us on past seasons that Morty has stopped viewing Rick with that wide eyed expression for a long time. He is learning from him and can defend himself, so why does he need Rick at al? The answer is because he loves him. You can read that as platonic or romantic or whatever, but for better or for worse Morty just loves Rick. You shouldn’t love people because you need them, or at least that is not a healthy basis for any relationship. I said this on another post: you cannot make anyone to be your center for your mental health like that, and I feel like they aware of this point, which I really fucking love because it would have been easy as fuck to write any pairing like that. -If you stay for the “Behind of scenes” scenes, the writers talk about how this season is about building trust between Rick and Morty. So it starts with Morty going around cleaning up some of the messes Rick left behind without telling Rick and then fucking the portal gun because he doesn’t trust Rick to not “kill him” to finding out he did that, just like Rick in fact doesn’t trust Morty to not be doing unnecesary bullshit. So Morty, hurt because his suspicions were right, puts an ultimatum and Rick, being the petty fuck we all know him to be, takes it kind because of course he would. -What does Morty does immediately after this? Latch onto another sketchy as fuck older man whose name ends with Ick and hope that is the connection he craves, because after all “we are like brothers now.” So rebound for him, rebound for Rick, rebounds for the crows, rebounds for everyone. Yay. -I know it has been however many years have passed since this show started, and it was obvious for fucking everyone who watched it, but I do really like that they use the exact words for how their dynamic has been: unhealthy, toxic, abusive. Lack of trust, lack of boundaries, secrets. Just straight up calling it as it is. So they have both of them confronting that fact, being aware of it, and to top it all off, make Morty the only being now on their universe that knows everything about Rick, every single thing he has kept even from BP, like the true reason he joined to their guerilla group, and still makes the conscious choice to go after Rick even when, as far he was aware of at least, there was another option. -So, okay, now what, might someone ask. We have put everything out there and we have talked about what is wrong about their relationship, does this mean we are doing the boring healthy bullshit now? Well, nope. Considering that Morty did went out of his way to guilt trip Rick into getting back and Rick admits point blank admits he get it, Morty refusing to demand things be different because he is just desperate... they are still and probably always going to be a condependent mess, but hey, a condependent mess that at least is kinda self aware about it and won’t pull the “I am going to break up with you on a whim” move again, hopefully. I do think and expect some things to change, but only as far their dynamic during adventures goes and regarding the rest of the family, with everyone being on the know that those two are an item neither of them can get in between. Rick is probably still going to want to keep some things in control, he is still not going to express his feelings to Morty directly and Morty is still going to be a little shit that will want for validation that won’t come his way. It’s a shithole house, but at leat it’s their home kind of thing, and personally, that is how I like it. -The “adventures as a metaphor for a relationship so this is not like a real break up” is real funny when you hear the writers literally calling it a break up and a relatonship. Also, the amount of times that they say “my partner”. Like, I am sorry, but how the fuck I am supposed to believe this wasn’t for the shippers, fucking how? Like even if you aren’t one, and you go “it’s a metaphor!! it’s not like an actual relationship, they are not saying they are together as a couple”, that is flimsy as fuck because we have determined already that Rick uses adventures as an extension for all his relationships. There is a intentional paralel between BP and Morty and how Rick treats the both of them, like he would do anything for them but still be kind of a lying piece of shit too, so it’s definitely canon on the sense -Omg, we had miniature cute Mortys who like crayons and also big hot adult Morty, fucking finally. I cannot fucking believe they wouldn’t know the blessing they were throwing to fandom with that one, they know what they are doing. -Rick as a boy dressing on the same colors of Morty could have been a cute little detail, like aww, they are family, so they pass down those colors from one generation to another because family, but fuck all of that, let’s make it creepy and fucked up because why not. But it’s also interesting because if Ricks breeded Mortys and put those colors on them, isn’t that another way of saying “you are connected to us just as much as we are connected to you”? Because they didn’t had to chose those colors, but they did it because it meant something for them. On a very fucked up way, I think they might even feel themselves more fathers to Morty than even Beth, because many of them didn’t cared manipulating her in order to gain more Mortys even if they could just clone them easily. -”You all really are bred for forgiveness”... Not really, or else “Evil Morty” wouldn’t exist and Cop Rick, the good one, would have never been attacked by using the attachment of Ricks against him. But Morty had made his choice and that choice was Rick, and even then Rick cannot fucking believe it so he has to reduce it to his breeding. -So, the finite curve has been destroyed and almost all Ricks were killed, the ones that weren’t coincidentally fucking off to another place just when that happened. That means that now there is true infinite universe where Rick is not the smartest man on the universe, where Rick doesn’t even exist at all, so we may have adventures where other people where the smartest people on their universe and Rick could finally meet his equal or someone even worse. -The final speech of Mr Poppybutthole is kinda the perfect ending to everything, because he is talking avoid being afraid of the people he loves finding the “true” self of him and not loving him anymore, but Morty did that and he still loves Rick and, listen, I have FEELINGS about it, okay. -After exploring this, which was the true only canonical mistery of the whole series, while also dumping off the backstory of Rick so nobody has to theorize about it anymore, it feels like they going two routes: either we are dumping anything about serialized anything, at least for a while, and we are back to just silly adventures with asshole grandpa and traumatized kid, or... we are introducing another big baddie that we are going to drag to hell and back. Maybe Evil Jerry? That could be fun to explore on the show. My bet is on the second option because I think that is the kind of thing that Justin really enjoys doing and that is why it appears on Solar Opposites as well, with the whole Wall as a central points behind all the shenanigans of the aliens. -The only misteries left are: the weird Rick that killed his family, if he wasn’t killed already on the Citadel, and Birdperson reunion with his daughter, for which he might ask Rick’s help in the future when he cools down or maybe Rick gets his daughter back for him on a ridiculous plan to make him return his calls, because that is something he is going to pull. The Jessica thing and her quest for becoming an actual character with her own thing going on. -This finale made rickmorty canon on all the ways it could without having them literally making out willingly, and after Naruto, I don’t think that is a line they are not willing to cross at some point in the future, even if it’s just a joke. They already did with the parasites. I honestly don’t even know how you can watch the show and think “fuck yeah, they hate those ships just as much as I do!”, because with the way the writers talk about it and literally this entire season being nothing but a building up for their relationship, I would have been turned if I didn’t ship it already.
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76. it’s my birthday and you just fucking ruined my party and I don’t even know you
Danbrey, sfw or nsfw, please!
Here you go! I went SFW on this one
“Wow, dude, this is so fancy.” Jake takes in the dining room of Yosemite Lodge, “look, napkins!”
“Jake, we have cloth napkins back home.” Dani smiles fondly; while she’s more interested in the location and the decor, she agrees with her brothers overall enthusiasm.
The rest of Amnesty Lodge, where Dani lives and works, pooled their resources to surprise her with a weekend trip to Yosemite for her twenty-fifth birthday. She would have been happy camping, but they even went to the trouble of booking rooms in the main lodge and scheduling her a birthday dinner in the restaurant that looks out onto the valley.
Mama whistles at the menu from her seat at the head of the table, “damn, this is a good lookin dinner.”
Dani picks up the single sheet of paper, the silver writing informing her the meal with consist of a summer salad, shrimp scampie, and a strawberry rhubarb tart for dessert. When she glances across the table, Barclay is smiling down into his water glass.
“Oh my god, did you request a specific menu just for me?”
Her friend nods, blushing a little, “Head chef is an old friend from my line cook days.”
“Aw, you guys.” She sips the fancy cider Barclay ordered for the table, “you didn’t have to do all this.”
“You ain’t had a real party in years; seemed time to fix that.” Mama’s about to say something else when the fire alarm blares through the room and a server asks that everyone please exit through the side doors into the courtyard.
“Probably just a false alarm.” Barclay leans against a decorative rock.
“Uh, dudes? I smell smoke.”
Dani cranes her neck, tracks the path of the curling smoke through the lights from the windows to the main meeting room on the bottom floor of the hotel. A woman about her age, dressed entirely in red and black with, “The Lady Flame” emblazoned on her sparkly jacket, is talking and gesturing rapidly with disgruntled staff.
Two minutes later, the same woman steps onto the lawn with a sheepish smile.
“Hi everyone! It’s safe to go back in now. I, um, there was a tiny accident with some flashpaper. I think. Anyway, point is, I’m super sorry and there’s no more fire so please come enjoy my show. Oh, but, um, we have to move to the dining room due to some, um, ash.”
Just as she says this, one of the servers whispers in Barclays ear.
“Fuck. Sorry gang, sounds like we gotta postpone until tomorrow; whatever party booked ms fireball over there is gonna take up the whole restaurant.”
Dani sighs, resigning herself to a night of vending machine dinner as they head back inside. Then a hand settles on her arm and she’s locking eyes with the person who just ruined her evening.
“Hey, I always ask the cutest girl in the audience to be my assistant for the next bit. Do you want to-”
She pulls her arm away, “Yeah, hard pass, I’m not in whatever group decided to book you. I’m the person who’s birthday is getting turfed for your party.”
The magician cringes, “EEsh, I’m so sorry, I’ll, um, I’ll just.” She steps back, eyes glued to her black boots. As Dani continues into the lodge, she swears she hears the same voice go, “aw beans.”
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The spring sunshine feels perfect, the breeze is gentle, and there are literal bluebirds calling around her. Dani feels like a dang disney princess as she naps on a rock near one of the meadows.
Something--a chipmunk, she assumes--munches the grass below her.
“Dr Harris Bonkers, no! This is a national park and I’m not letting my only son go to jail for vandalism.”
Dani rolls onto her side in time to see the magician from last night scooping a massive, orange rabbit from the ground. When she straightens enough to notice she’s not alone, the woman freezes.
“Um. Hi. Again.”
“Hi.” Not feeling like rehashing last night, she studies the rabbit, “should he really be running around out here?”
“Not even remotely. He was supposed to stay in my room, but he gnawed his way out of his carrier, hopped onto the windowsill, and decided to bounce when he saw all the plants out here.” She cautiously sits on the edge of the rock, rabbit in her lap, “I really am sorry about last night. I never used to have problems during my shows, but lately it’s like my flashpaper has a freaking mind of its own. I was kinda hoping it wouldn’t screw with anybody’s plans but mine.”
“It’s fine.” Dani shrugs, “we’re just going to do a dinner re-do tonight.”
The woman bites a matte black lip, “Could I, um, make it up to you?”
“How?”
“Well, it’s your birthday, right? You’re supposed to spend your birthday doing things you like, so I could, like, keep you company while you do them?”
It would be nice to have a hiking buddy. Mama is taking a well-deserved nap, Barclay is off for a swim, and Jake found some rock climbers to hang with. And while the Lady Flame looked good last night, today she’s downright gorgeous. The dyed-red streaks in her curly, black hair, the freckles, black shorts that make her butt look incredible, all of it adds up to someone Dani wouldn’t mind spending the day with.
“Do you have shoes you can hike in?”
She kicks up one leg, showing off her Doc Martens, “I once walked five miles in these with no problems.”
“Great. Let’s get the doctor” she rubs the rabbit’s ears, “somewhere safe and get on the trail.”
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The hike’s only three and a half miles, but it’s taking them a long time to complete it. Not because they’re slow, but because Aubrey (as the Lady Flame calls herself) keeps stopping to look at or point out any interesting thing that catches her eye. It’s adorable.
Dani likes when she points out plants, because then she can show off a little.
“Dang, you really know your plants.” Aubrey stoops to take a picture of some Scarlet Monkeyflower.
“I run the teaching garden out back of the Lodge. Uh, Amnesty Lodge, where I live, not this one.”
“Coooool. I keep thinking about making Dr. Harris Boners a little garden when I finally find a place to stay put for awhile, but everything is always about how to keep bunnies out of your garden.”
“I mean, they can really trash it if you’re not careful.”
“I believe it, Dr. Harris Bonkers can take out a whole patch of rug in, like, ten minutes.”
“Herbs would probably be okay, clover too. I guess it depends on how much space you have.”
“Probably not much” Aubrey holds out a hand to help her across a creek, “traveling magicians don’t make much.”
Their talk turns to Aubrey’s life on the road, and her various misadventures trying to transport a fifteen pound rabbit on public transit. When they reach the waterfall that marks the trails end, they slip off their shoes and socks to dip their feet in the nearby pond, shoulders touching as they compare notes on growing up in sometimes stressful family situations.
It’s well after lunchtime when they get back, so they sit in the meadow and split a bag of chips, shooing away several overly ambitious squirrels. Mama joins them for a bit, and Dani smiles when she notices how quickly the older woman takes to Aubrey. Mama can never turn down a stray.
Dani’s already scheming for how to spend the last day of her vacation with Aubrey when the magician turns down her invitation to dinner. She’s a little disappointed, but Aubrey promises she’ll see her later.
Her birthday dinner redux is halfway into its second course when the lights at the front of the room brighten and the ones above her dim.
“And now, as an added, surprise treat for this evening's meal, the magnificent Lady Flame is here to dazzle you all with her astounding feats of magic!” The server at the edge of the room gives a thumbs up and Aubrey bounds into view, smile glittering brighter than her outfit.
To Dani’s delight, Aubrey is an amazing magician; her tricks are interesting, her patter is the same funny, energetic pace that their conversations were this afternoon, and her assistant is adorable. When she declares she needs a volunteer for her next trick, she’s holding her hand out to Dani before anyone else can raise theirs.
The trick turns out to be picking cards and showing them to the audience, though Dani notices Aubrey devotes as much sleight of hand to brushing their fingers together as she does to her act.
“And now, esteemed audience, I will produce a flower from my lovely assistant's hair!”
Dani smiles, then claps along with everyone else as Aubrey produces a spring of Larkspur from thin air. Literally, Dani cannot for the life of her tell where she was hiding it. Or how she was able to get what Dani said was her favorite flower on such short notice.
Aubrey finishes up her act (and doesn’t set anything on fire) to thunderous applause, and Dani spots Mama leaning over to whisper something to Barclay, who nods thoughtfully. It’s only after the magician has taken her last bow that Dani has a horrible realization; Aubrey went to all that trouble to make her birthday dinner memorable, and she didn’t get to eat any of it.
Her white sandals sink into the carpet as she carries a plate down to Aubrey’s room. When her new friend opens the door, she’s between worlds; sparkly jacket on top, red pajama pants on the bottom.
“I brought you some cake. Or, uh, I guess it’s a tart.” She holds out the plate and Aubrey takes it, cheeks going pink, “since you didn’t get the rest of the dinner.”
“Thanks” Aubrey steps back so Dani can join her in the room, “it’s chill that I didn’t get to join you all; I wanted to make up for ruining your dinner last night.”
“You already did way more than that. Aubrey, this was the nicest day I’ve had in months, and most of that is because I got to spend it with you.”
“I dunno, feel weird getting cake from a thing I crashed.” Aubrey is fidgeting with her bracelets, blushing harder every time she looks up and finds Dani still smiling at her.
“Can I give you something else instead?” Dani takes a half-step forward.
“Sure! What-” Aubrey’s words fade into a little sigh as Dani wraps her arms over her shoulders. Then her back bumps into the nightstand as Aubrey throws herself into a kiss.
“Hey” Dani teases, nibbling her ear as Aubrey holds her tighter, “you messed up my big reveal.”
“Aw dang, guess I’ll have to make it up to you.” Aubrey slips her hands down to the small of her back, “how does even more making out sound?”
Dani pulls her towards the bed, heart buzzing with warmth at the sight of her smile and the touch of her hands, “like the best birthday gift ever.”
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Let’s talk about the old Techno tweets
For a week now, I’ve been sitting on this ask that linked me to a Twitter callout thread on SBI. Although I have many thoughts about the entire thread, I’ve since only had the time and will to respond to the Techno part, and I figured instead of keeping it in my drafts and waiting to gather the energy to write the rest, I’d just post what I have.
Here is the thread, for reference: https://twitter.com/burner0321/status/1379103348364865536?s=21 Trigger Warnings: anti-semitism, mentions of genocide, racism, n* slur, r* slur, ableism, lesbophobia, racism Please prioritize your health and safety, and do not engage with this thread or this post if you will get triggered by any of the aforementioned. I love you, please take care of yourself, first.
So, let’s talk Technoblade’s history of making “edgy” jokes. When CCs tend to use edginess as a cover for offensive humor, they tend to do so to cover up the fact that their humor involves taking shots at minorities or employs harmful stereotypes, without addressing why people get offended by such jokes. However, when I call Technoblade’s old humor edgy, this is not what I mean. The reason I do not think people are justified in demanding an apology or addressing of the jokes in the Twitter thread is because they do not use the minorities or horrible things they address as the punchline. A joke can be in bad taste, without being malicious. This is edgy humor. In explaining my point, I want to address as many of the specific things in the thread as possible.
1) I don’t fully understand the “was Hitler a lesbian?” tweet or the title of that video, so I won’t address that. If someone has something to say about it, feel free to reply to this post, I’d love to see what you think of it.
2) Next, we have the, “titling my next video ‘mvp++ is worse than nazi germany’” tweet. What is the joke in this tweet? The joke is that the comparison between a Minecraft game and a fascist regime that caused genocide is ridiculous, and as such, would be effective clickbait, and draw people into the video. The joke is not that Nazi Germany should be taken lightly; it is actually the complete opposite.
3) Next, “#askpewds do you have any constructive criticism for Nazi Germany.” Frankly, without the context of timeframe or what the hell was going on within the Twittersphere at the time, I can only make a reach as to what this joke meant. I assume it’s in reference to the time period during which Pewdiepie was being framed as a fascist by several media outlets, and could either be a joke on the fact that people believe Pewdiepie to be a neo-Nazi, or a shot at Pewdiepie himself, by playing on the fact that he actually does espouse neo-Nazi beliefs. Again, the punchline is far from, “Nazi Germany was good,” or anything along those lines. Edgy, not anti-semitic.
4) The vampireZ tweet. The joke here is, “why did vampireZ think this was a good idea,” not, “haha get it, black people kill people.” As with many of these kinds of jokes, the existence of the word, “black” in the joke makes people think he is insulting black people. In reality, the tweet points out that the game is fitting into the history of media portraying black people as the more aggressive, violent, and/or murderous characters, and is like, “hey, isn’t this kinda fucked?”
5) This tweet actually does make an offensive joke that is malicious in its intent. Congratulations, we are five tweets in, and we finally found a joke that makes minorities the punchline. I completely understand people’s criticisms of this one. The punchline here is, “haha, I’m one of those entitled people who claims that racial profiling is the reason I was wronged,” and this minimizes the fact that racial profiling is an real, serious, and widespread problem. This tweet makes it seem like people claim that racial profiling is the reason they are excluded from spaces or that punitive actions that were enacted upon them are doing so unjustly. This can be extrapolated from the fact that it’s ridiculous to think that a) a Minecraft server would racially profile someone, and b) that a white person would be racially profiled.
6) This tweet literally just seems like a sarcastic response to someone who was accused of being a white supremacist and/or racist. Presumably, SealPlays was defending himself of not being racist, and Technoblade responded sarcastically that he was "totally” trying to recruit him to the KKK. I literally see no reason someone thought this was malicious? This does not make light of the KKK, and it doesn’t make black people or any other group or individual victimized by the KKK the punchline.
7) The slavery jokes. Presumably, the slavery jokes are in reference to the times on his Skyblock, SMP Earth, and/or Dream SMP streams and videos, during which Technoblade has done bits about making some of his friends slaves for him, so he has to do less work. Again, slavery jokes might be in bad taste, but there was literally no racial context to this, given that he wasn’t make jokes about any black CCs being his slaves. This is not to mention that he always played up the role of the one telling the people what to do, making it out to be a very negative role that only an arrogant, selfish, and/or callous person would fill. Think, Alec Baldwin playing Trump. This part of the thread is, however, so vague, that it’s hard to know exactly what instances the OP is even talking about.
There are several reasons I am personally angered by this section of the thread, but in an effort to make this post shorter, I’ll only discuss two: One, there are genuinely things that CCs, including Technoblade, have said, that carry ignorant and malicious connotations. The racial profiling joke is just one example. To create a thread where most of the examples are absolute bullshit, lack context, and/or were misinterpreted on your part is a disservice to minorities who want to have productive conversations about genuinely harmful things. I want to talk about this idea that minorities who talk about their experiences with microaggressions, such as racial profiling, are seeking attention/using an excuse/lying. But that one tweet is so buried under this mountain of bullshit that has everyone talking over each other and screaming, that the one conversation we should be having cannot be had. Two, I am utterly exhausted at watching people misinterpet jokes. As I have already said again and again, just because a joke mentions something horrible, does not mean it is malicious, or that it even harms anyone. A joke needs to make light of something horrible and/or make minorities the punchline to cross the line from “edgy” to “explicitly offensive.”
I would like to make a disclaimer: there is always two sides to a CC doing something wrong. There is the CC, who may or may not have had malicious intent, and there is the audience, who may or may not take offense to what was done or said. Both of these are separate, and I will treat them as such. What I am examining in this post is mostly the first thing - were the things said or jokes made meant with racist, anti-semitic, homophobic, etc., intent, or are people unjustified in stating that they were? That being said, and this is important: anyone is allowed to take offense to and not forgive a CC for making a joke or saying something, no matter what. Even if a joke was meant satirically or does not actually offend minorities, if you, as an individual, take offense to it and were deeply hurt by it, that is fucking valid. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise. A CC can apologize for something, and that can mean that objectively, they are not a bad person and/or have grown, but that does not mean you have to forgive them. There are two sides to this coin, and they are not inherently dependent upon each other.
If someone is offended by any of the jokes Techno made, that is perfectly valid and understandable. Even if I or anyone else comes to the objective conclusion that any given joke doesn’t have malicious intent, that doesn’t erase minorities’ very real feelings about such.
#i wrote all of this a few days ago#the only thing i wrote just now was the first paragraph#just wanted to put that out there#techno critical#mcyttwt#racism#anti-semitism#lesbophobia#mcyt#.txt#/neg#discourse
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Impromptu Ramblings about the NEO:TWEWY Demo
In case y'all weren't aware, I've been a pretty big fan of TWEWY for a couple years now, and with the sequel coming out next month, the excitement I feel for this game is greater than ever :) I played the Demo for the first time yesterday, and following a couple views of some livestreams of others playing it, I felt like sharing my (very ramble-y) thoughts prior to the release of the full game. This post WILL contain spoilers for both TWEWY and NEO:TWEWY, so if you want to avoid those from now on, please block the tags: #twewy spoilers, #ntwewy spoilers, #neo twewy spoilers, #ntwewy, and #neo twewy ^_^ Oh, and if you wanna keep up with any other posts I make about my experience with this game, please refer to the tag "kat plays neo twewy" :)
-First things first: I have not watched the Final Trailer and I don't plan on doing so to avoid spoilers, especially after the pre-release era of KH3 where a lot of the later trailers spoiled a lot of the endgame content. That being said, I've seen some minor screenshots from the final trailer including what many believe to be characters from the original TWEWY, namely Shiki and Joshua. That is all I know about the Final Trailer and I would very much like to remain as blind as possible going into NEO :)
-The very first cutscene was quite ominous in the sense that this game is likely going to be about "changing fate" (a recently common theme in Squeenix games, which I do appreciate), perhaps leading off from the end of A New Day in the OG and trying to stop an Inversion of Shibuya. Also worth noting that A New Day had similar aspects in which the main character experienced "future visions" of tragic events, although in A New Day these events were not able to be changed, while in NEO it seems like one of the main "powers" our protagonist has is specifically to rewrite these events and avoid a "bad ending." Very interesting indeed!
-I really like the revamped comic book style dialogue scenes, it's much more fluid and modern, which is an excellent direction for the series to take!
-I would love to have an actual PokemonGO knockoff of Final Fantasy creatures, please Squeenix that would be incredibleeeeee
-Also the LINE stickers??? Are so cute???
-I would just like to point out that Fret is an absolute treasure throughout this entire demo, he's hilarious and I will protect him with my life
-UHHHH don't like that Fret picked up some Reaper Pins just out of nowhere.....or the fact that they're apparently popular all over Shibuya.............did y'all not learn anything from the OG game or what lmao
-Okay so when I first got the "curry or ramen" scene and heard NPCs talking about the new curry place replacing the old ramen place I became IMMENSELY distressed that Ramen Don was totally cut from the game because....well, Ramen Don is a King okay?? But I'm glad to learn that no, he didn't fall off the face of the earth, he's still in business and he's the one opening the curry restaurant lolol. PHEW, crisis averted!
-.....I don't like the sudden appearance of a Wall Reaper and being able to read NPC thoughts. Wtf happened when they left the ramen place??? Are they playing the Game alive somehow?
-Okay so I have my own theories about this "Swallow" character and what they're up to but considering this is only the Demo and I still Have No Idea What's Happening, I'm just gonna say that I think Swallow intentionally led Rindo and Fret to the Crossing so they could join the Game. I mean, add in the fact that Swallow still communicates with Rindo during the Game and you've got yourself a suspicious character right there lol
-"Hey they're shooting off fireworks!" Fret honey that's not fireworks oof (see also: "*laughs* I'm in danger")
-WOOOOOO way to traumatize Rindo right off the bat like that LMAOO
-The visuals for the intro are VERY GOOD, the song is pretty decent until it gets all "screamo" (which I absolutely cannot stand sorry lol)
-Shoka is every Customer Service employee ever and I respect that
-Susukichi went from being "meh" to "WOW THIS GUY IS FUN" in the span of 10 seconds and I also respect that (he is also built like an Absolute Unit which is hilarious)
-The Wall Reapers (and just Reapers in general) seem.....way nicer and more helpful this time around?? Like in the OG the Wall Reapers were SO RUDE gfhjgjdfkhn and yeah I'm sure we'll get some like that but the juxtaposition of the first Wall Reaper in the OG compared to the first one in NEO is insane.
-The puzzles are quite a bit more entertaining this time around even if it's generally the same "fetch quest" formula lol
-"Rindo's Group" way to go Fret HFKJDGHSDFKJ mans really left the default name in there lmao
-OKAYOKAYOKAY so to those who aren't aware I am a MASSIVE SIMP for Sho Minamimoto, he's my absolute favorite and I think about him daily. HIS INTRODUCTION IS. INCREDIBLE. I LOVE IT SM.
-GOD hearing him actually SPEAK FULL SENTENCES is just SO SURREAL I love this sm
-Also the remix of his theme???? NEO TRANSFORMATION????? IT'S SO GOOD????????? It's like gone from a Boss Theme to a more triumphant sounding theme and I am HERE for it (every version of Transformation is just INCREDIBLE and getting a new one is even better)
-I Love Him, Your Honor
-Also idk how exactly but it's kinda weird seeing Sho in the OG vs NEO, cuz while he's mostly the same Insane Math-Obsessed Catboy, he's.....calmed down quite a bit?? Like OG made a whole point of how poorly he cooperates with others (not to mention just being completely unhinged and trying to kill everyone), whereas here in NEO he's......actually kinda working with others??? HELLO???? Sir what happened to you and Neku during those 3 years I would love to know all about it
-I guarantee you Sho is still probably scheming shite and will likely pull some total insane BS later down the road, and I am very much looking forward to that. Also, is he looking for a certain Pin or something??? Cuz he keeps talking about different Pins and even mentions "this is just another Psych Pin" like he's actively looking for a Pin to do something with. Maybe it also has to do with the "latent powers of Players" thing he mentioned as well??? What is this dude UP TO oml (also is he in contact with Neku at all?? they're both technically fugitives at this point right?? WHAT HAPPENED AFTER A NEW DAY I AM BEGGING YOU)
-I seems like Sho ALSO has an idea of what's going on in this specific game (even if he won't admit it straightforward). Per his quote "The game's 142,857. Factor it out," he's essentially saying, "This game is a neverending cyle, figure out how to get out of it" (or at least that's what I got from his "cyclic number" nonsense lolol)
-I do like how Sho mostly stays out of sight until he's needed for a battle or assisting with a mission, that's kind of on par with his whole "uncooperative" quirk from the OG, plus he might literally have to stay out of sight of other Reapers and Players considering he's likely breaking the rules of the Game (not surprising considering him and Neku broke practically every rule in the book during OG)
-The nicknames for Sho- I can't- They're so FUNNYYYY GFHJSDFKJ
-He goes from being called "Pi-Face" and "Tabooty" in OG to "Mr. Minami" and "M-Teezy" in NEO LMAOO
-(Wowee I just realized I've been mostly talking about Sho oopsies sorry y'all, this is what I meant by thinking about him almost daily he is THAT much of a fav of mine ghfkjsd)
-Okay RIP Fret and Rindo for not getting literally ANY explanation as to how the Game works OOF, that is kinda cringe that whoever gets the Pin earns points, not whoever erases the Noise (which like I understand but also URRRGGHHH I WANNA SEE THE SQUAD SUCCEED)
-"I should be going home now it's getting late" Oh you sweet summer child-
-Also love the mention of parents in this game???? KH you could learn a thing or two from TWEWY (poor Rindo's mom fhgjkdh)
-KUBO IS HILARIOUS I SUPPORT HIM AND HIS GROSS FACE (also thank you Final Trailer thumbnail for spoiling my suspicions about him very cool smh)
-Kaie is a LAD I also support him, go King type those funky texts I believe in you
-FRET PLS STOP SCANNING FHGJKSDHKJFGHFKJ he's like me when I scan in OG during Weeks 2 and 3 and see Taboo Noise coming after me ghfjdshfj
-Also Rindo can you stay off your phone for TWO SECONDS ik you're trying to figure things out but Fret is a jelly boi and I don't want him to be upset with you my guy
-Sho being an actual sorta mentor to the kiddos?? Who are you sir this is so unlike you ghfgskj what happened to the guy who tried shooting children in the face 8 times over LMAO (granted he's probably just using them but it's still nice to see him actually cooperating and sharing knowledge with the kiddos aaaaa)
-EYO EIJI OJI THE TIKTOK INFLUENCER IS BACK LMAO
-hgjkfshgkjf "we aren't glorifying capitalism on my watch" THATS SO FUNNY TO ME GFHJFSDGHJKS (also an all-orange ensemble is disgusting you deserve jail for one thousand years fkn Cheddar Goldfish Cheezit ass woman)
-WICKED TWISTERS NAME DROP EYOOO we love to see it
-gfhsgjf Poor Rindo embarassing himself for the sake of the Game that's incredible
-R e t u r n t o M O N K E. That is all.
-Dialogue during boss battles is HELLA cool i love that
-HHHHH THE KANON SCENE MADE ME A N G E R Y FRET STOP SIMPING MY GUY says the girl with a Literal Simp Encyclopedia and simps for pixels on a screen daily
-Can't wait to see the other Reapers :eyes emoji:
-CAN'T WAIT TO SEE NAGI MY BELOVED YEAHHHH WOOOOOO AAAAND that's about it for the demo lolol, I absolutely CANNOT wait for next month, this game is gonna be INCREDIBLE holy hell Prepare for more simping, more screaming, and more vibing from Yours Truly :) I fully intend on sharing more general thoughts like this on both Tumblr and Twitter so it's not just reblog-retweet-reblog-retweet with the occasional comment fhgskjd
If you wanna witness my insanity up close and personal I have a Square Enix Discord server called Sea Side Dreamers! You can look it up on Disboard, or you can add me on Discord @Katara0524#9244 for a direct link :) We have topics about Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, NieR, and ofc TWEWY (as well as other topics!), so if you want some good ol' chaos and chitchat, you're more than welcome to join!
#neo twewy#ntwewy#neo twewy spoilers#ntwewy spoilers#twewy#neo: the world ends with you#the world ends with you#twewy spoilers#twewy rindo#rindo kanade#twewy fret#tosai furesawa#twewy sho#sho minamimoto#long post#also shameless Discord plug lmaooo#kat plays neo twewy
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I would like to revisit my alternate S5 ending...
...to address the villainous aspect of Lena’s character instead of ignoring it, in which case the big reveal leading to the final stretch of episodes being the superfriends finding a hidden server at the DEO that seems devoted to tracking and monitoring a secret convoy.
When they track it down, they crack open a freight truck to find it modified into a prison inside. A prison with a single prisoner.
Locked in a straightjacket and blinded by a dark hood, they can’t fathom who it might be. But when Supergirl wrenches the cell door off its hinges the bare feet that recoil in fear are delicate and pale.
A woman?
Kara reaches out with wary care, and gently removes the hood.
It takes her an eternal moment before she pieces the dark hair and pale skin and green eyes into the complete picture of Lena Luthor.
Except this Lena isn’t the one who glared at her from across her desk in the LuthorCorp headquarters not so long ago. This Lena has sallow skin and dark bruises under her eyes and limp hair and flinches away from Kara without looking at her... but it is Lena.
Kara reaches for Lena’s cheek, but flinches away when Lena kicks out, still without lifting her eyes. “Don’t touch me.”
The clink of a chain follows as Lena scoots away-- a repurposed leash that tethers her to the wall of the truck, barely a foot of give. This Lena is small and skittish of the bodies milling in the truck around them, pressing closer with dangerous intent, but it’s still...
“Lena?”
Bruised green eyes snap to Kara, locking on her face for a long shuddering moment before they drift to the symbol on her chest.
“K-Kara...”
Bruised green eyes fill with tears, and even though it doesn’t make sense, none of it makes sense, because this isn’t the woman who cried in anguish in the Fortress of Solitude, this isn’t the person who turned her back on Kara’s hologram, but it is the Lena who leans towards Kara for comfort as reality kicks in, and the tears spill over.
It is the Lena who Kara wraps her arms around, and holds her close.
---
In a Tower interrogation room, they learn Lena knows less than they do.
“I don’t know,” Lena tells them from across the table. “I woke up, in the-- in a lab, and my brother was there. He told me--”
Her eyes flicker to Kara, then away.
“He told me some awful things.”
She’d spent most of the time since exactly where they’d found her. Lex didn’t seem to want anything, except to keep her contained. Contained, and alone. But when they move the conversation to the medbay, where Alex examines her, she locks up, and can barely seem to breathe for all the equipment around her.
When Alex comes in with a syringe, Lena recoils. “No. No, no, no...”
“Whoa, hey,” Kara soothes, “it’s okay. It’s okay.”
“It’s just a booster,” Alex says. “Cocktail shot of some vitamins and electrolytes.”
“See?” Kara holds Lena’s hand. “Nothing to be afraid of.”
Lena’s eyes lock on Kara’s, but she doesn’t pull away when Alex moves back in for a second attempt. Kara brushes the hair from Lena’s forehead, hoping the touch will keep Lena focused on her rather than the needle. It works.
But when Lena starts to relax when the needle withdraws, it’s not in relief. Lena’s eyes grow wild with panic, even as they start to drift shut. “You said...”
Kara looks to Alex, and finds her sister’s features solemn and unyielding. Sudden anger flares at Alex’s lie, that Alex lied to her, but focuses instead comforting Lena.
“It’s okay,” she promises. “You’re safe. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
---
“We don’t know who she is,” Alex defends herself later.
“She’s Lena, Alex.”
“So is the person who kidnapped J’onn’s brother and stole Myriad,” comes the counter. “Maybe she really doesn’t know anything, or maybe she does. Until we know exactly what is going on, she cannot be trusted.”
And so when Kara next visits Lena, it’s from the far side of the isolation cell glass. Lena sits curled in a ball, head on her knees, shoulders slumped in defeat.
“They don’t believe me.”
It’s not a question. There’s no doubt in Lena now. No more fear. She’s back in a situation she’s familiar with-- being contained, being controlled. There’s a bitter sense of comfort in it.
“Lex told me they wouldn’t,” Lena continues. “He was right. About them. About you.”
Just as with the Lena who sits at her desk in Luthorcorp headquarters, Kara can barely face the hurt in this Lena’s gaze. She almost looks away, but stops herself. This time, she holds Lena’s gaze, and faces the anguish she’d been unable to face the last time.
But this time, Lena isn’t looking for comfort.
“Go away.”
It’s not the second chance Kara hoped for. That second chance remains out of her reach as Lena turns away and doesn’t speak for days after. The only further information they get out of her is that her last memory before waking up in Lex’s lab is of her pulling the trigger on her brother. Of killing him.
“She doesn’t deserve to be here,” Kara argues to Alex. “I know you don’t trust her, but I do. I’m not saying we should just let her out on her own--” they have no idea why or how there are two Lena’s, but risking the two meeting would be a bad, bad idea. “What I’m saying is that she come stay with me. I’ll keep an eye on her, and maybe she’ll be able to trust us enough to give us more information.”
And so Lena soon finds herself standing awkwardly in the middle of Kara’s apartment. She looks around like she’s never been there before. Maybe she hasn’t. Or maybe she has, and she’s absorbing the minutiae of differences since her last visit.
Kara suspects the latter, when she sees Lena’s gaze linger on a photo of the most recent game night that scrolls across her sleeping laptop. It’s one she loves because it includes Winn. That it’s one without James and Lena both leaves her feeling empty.
But when another photo from that night scrolls across, a close up of Will, Kara, and Nia, Lena’s jaw tightens. When Lena averts her gaze, Kara catches a glimpse of anger, and an old guilt rears its ugly head in Kara’s chest. She should have been quicker to invite Lena into her life. Into their game nights, into her secret, into everything. Will’s quick acceptance of and by the group proves that the only thing that kept Lena at arm’s length was Kara’s own inhibitions.
Her own fear.
“Lena, I--”
“I assume I’m taking the couch,” Lena grumbles, forestalling any overture. “Or is this where the chains and dog cage come out?”
Kara swallows thickly, unable to completely deny Lena’s concerns as outlandish, as she’d had to talk Alex out of physical restraints for her guest.
“No,” Kara replies. “No chains. No cages.” She shrugs. “I trust you.”
A scoff is all the response she gets to that.
---
Lena picks at her dinner, and barely eats a morsel before ultimately putting her plate aside. When Kara clears up, she listens to Lena’s breath and heart rate, finding some semblance of relief when Lena finds a comfortable position on the couch and finally, finally relaxes.
She takes her time, allowing Lena extra minutes to herself. When Kara finally returns, she does so with a mug of tea in each hand. Lena simply stares at hers when Kara sets it down in front of her. Kara tries not to notice the way Lena’s eyes follow her as she curls up in the chair opposite the couch. She stirs her tea with a pensiveness that’s not entirely genuine.
“Why didn’t you just tell me?”
The question comes as quiet as a sigh.
“All I ever wanted was to be trusted, and you let me believe that I was--”
Lena’s voice cracks, making tears spring to Kara’s eyes.
“Lex really was right. Nothing I did was ever going to be enough for you.”
“That is not true.” Kara sits forward. “It was never about that. Never.”
A shrug lifts Lena’s sweatered shoulder. She still has yet to meet Kara’s eye. “No, it wasn’t.”
Because if it had been, Lena would have been told a thousand times over. Like she should have been.
“I was afraid, Lena.” Kara curls her hands around her mug. “I know that must seem so foolish to you, and it does to me too, now. But before I told you? The thought of losing you--”
“What have I ever done to make you think I would hate you?”
“Because… you do?”
“I hate that you weren’t the one who told me. I hate that the words came from my brother, as he lay dying in front of me after I shot him in the chest. That’s what I hate. Not you.”
Kara’s throat locks around a sob, her eyes filling with tears. “Lena…”
“I hate that of all the things my brother is, everything he’s done… I hate that he’s more honest than you are.”
In a single blink, the floodgates open. Tears spill down Kara’s cheeks and don’t stop. On silent feet, Kara moves to kneel at Lena’s side. Reaching for Lena’s hand is a risk, but one that rewards Kara with warm fingers in hers.
“I’m sorry, Lena.” Her voice scrapes and scratches-- there’s no defense in her, no way to hide the raw emotion spilling from her. “I am so sorry. I should have told you. I should have trusted you. Not just with my secret. I should have trusted that you-- that our friendship-- was stronger than that.”
Lena takes a shuddering breath, one that seizes in a sob. When Lena leans towards her, Kara wraps both arms around her. Thin arms hug her back, and bony shoulders wrack with silent sobs.
“I’m so sorry, Lena.”
And just like that-- they start to heal.
---
Their peace doesn’t last long. J’onn can only pretend to be Supergirl for so long before the real thing is needed. Lena’s trust in being trusted is put to the test: she spends Kara’s time away curled on the sofa, eyes on the door, just waiting for Alex’s team to burst in and take her back to the isolation cell. When the only person to enter is Kara six hours later with four pizzas, garlic breadsticks, and a two liter of MelloYello in hand, Lena almost starts crying all over again.
When their paths end up crossing, Kara finds interacting with the other Lena difficult-- she spends the limited exchange searching Lena’s face for any hint that she knows a version of her exists besides herself; that a version of her is sitting in Kara’s apartment, wearing an oversized hoodie and baggy blue jeans.
Kara can’t find any.
Kara knows that doesn’t mean anything.
She goes home that night and asks her version of Lena for a hug. Her version of Lena gives it-- slowly, but without hesitation.
One night, Kara returns home to a ransacked apartment devoid of any Lena. There’s no question who is behind it the blood Kara finds on her hardwood floors. Only one man knows this Lena exists. Only one man knows where Supergirl might keep a traumatized best friend.
And there’s only one person who can go up against Lex Luthor and have a hope of coming out on top.
So Kara goes to the Lena Luthor whose eyebrow lifts in derision at the sight of her, and tells her everything. She explains the second version of Lena they’d found and lost again, tells her how Lex is behind it all, shares how they still haven’t any idea why.
And that Lena stares at her as though she wants to accuse her of more lies, more subterfuge, but when her lips part, what falls out is “then let’s find out.”
They track Lex to one of his many bunkers that still exist in this reality, and there they find him with the second Lena (or maybe the first, Kara’s still not sure). The Lena’s stare at each other, one with more surprise than the other. Kara supposes it’s hard to be surprised when one is cuffed hand and foot, with a collar around your neck.
Lex, for his part, only smiles. “Hey, sis.”
The chain connecting to the collar around Lena’s neck retracts into the ceiling, pulling her to the very tips of her toes and leaving her choking for breath. Kara shoots forward, but the area around the dangling Lena glows green with Kryptonite, effectively grinding her to a halt before she staggers back to be caught by the other Lena.
“Why?” that Lena asks her brother. “What good could having two of me possibly be to you when you don’t let one out of your sight?”
“Oh, you sweet summer child,” Lex returns. “I didn’t double you, god no. Why would I double my work trying to control you? No, I reduced you. By half.”
Shock ripples through them both. The sight of it makes Lex chuckle.
“You always had such potential, ace. But your judgement was always clouded by empathy-- you were always soft. But brilliant. Brilliant enough to figure me out. Splitting all of that between two of you, well… it made you far more pliable.”
“But…” Kara gasps. “How?”
Lex lifts a brow in an expression eerily like Lena’s. “You of all people should have figured it out by now, Supergirl.”
Just like that, the pieces click into place.
“The harun’el.”
The same mineral that once split Kara herself. The same mineral Lena spent months working with. Rao.
Lea leans towards her. “He means…?”
“Red Daughter,” Kara confirms.
She can still see her. Sometimes Kara dreams of her, still feels the weight of her body evaporating from her arms as she holds her dying counterpart.
Kara looks at Lena, sees her eyes dark with thought as they travel from Kara to her dangling twin, then to Lex. Lex receives her silent gaze with an almost proud grin.
“But I gotta say, sis, even I never imagined you’d go as far as Non Nocere.”
Kara staggers to take her own weight, freeing Lena to approach her brother. Whatever Kara expected Lena to say or do in confronting Lex, it wasn’t the sight of long fingers snatching a scalpel from a table as she passed, or for the movement to be so blatant that Lex would see it coming.
“Oh, come now, Lena,” Lex chides. “At least you were smart enough to bring a gun last time.”
Lena lifts the blade towards him, but her features twist into a smirk. “What makes you think this is for you?”
Before anyone has time to react, Lena lifts the blade and plunges it deep into her own throat.
“NO!” Lex and Kara cry in unison.
Kara moves faster, catching Lena as she falls. She cradles her friend in her arms, tears spilling down her cheeks. “Lena… why?”
“I refuse…” Lena gasps, “to be less...”
“What if--?”
“I’m not the copy?” Lena gurgles slightly through the blood filling her throat. It bubbles to her lips, staining them an unnatural red. “I’m the one he kept around. Just like…”
She coughs, unable to finish. Kara does it for her.
“Just like Red Daughter.”
Lena features droop, gray with increasing blood loss. “Don’t… let him… win…”
With her last crackling breath, Lena’s form melts away just like Red Daughter’s, misting into a purple ether that lifts from Kara’s arms and chases towards where Lena still hangs on the tips of her toes. The violet energy sinks into her, illuminating her entire frame for a split second before it pulses out of her in a violent burst that disintegrates her bonds and drops her to her knees, choking for breath.
Kara intercepts Lex when he makes a run for it-- she grabs him by the collar and tosses him back towards his sister, who still glows with unearthly light. He struggles to his knees as Lena climbs to her feet, eyes glowing with power.
“Okay, Lena, listen to me-- I just wanted the best for you. For us to be working together, just like we used to--!”
Lena roars. She roars so loud that Kara covers her ears under the onslaught, and peers through slitted eyes as the power of the harun’el funnels into Lena’s hands, mouth and hands, firing a single combined blast towards her cowering brother. It consumes him entirely.
When the light under Lena’s skin finally wanes, there is nothing left of Lex-- not even a scorch mark. In the silence that follows, Lena sags to her knees once more, exhausted.
Green eyes meet Kara’s, heavy and full of emotion Kara can’t quite decipher.
“I’m sorry,” Lena murmurs. “For everything.”
Kara staggers towards her, and collapses to her knees beside Lena. She wraps Lena in a fierce hug, tears still damp on her cheeks.
Lena’s alive. This time, Lena is whole.
Kara would have asked for nothing else in the world.
---
It doesn’t take long for normalcy to return after that. Lena steps up as the CEO she’s meant to be, and it’s less than a month before she announces her intent to rebrand LuthorCorp as L-Corp. Supergirl resumes her full duties, and this time does so with a true ally in Lena.
Still, there’s a hesitation in her chest when she arrives at Lena’s office one afternoon as Kara Danvers. She has Big Belly Burger in one hand, and kombucha in the other, the only peace offerings she can think to bring besides her heart, ready to be given if asked.
She steps into the room with said heart in her throat, and almost swallows her tongue when Lena’s gaze snaps up to her and freezes for a split second before softening in recognition. The smile that follows is as gentle as the first rays of sunlight on an early sunday morning, and warms Kara just as completely.
“Hey you,” Lena greets quietly. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”
It takes a long moment for Kara to realize she means Kara Danvers-- it’s been too long since Kara has been anything but Supergirl in front of Lena, even when she wasn’t wearing the cape.
“Yeah,” Kara agrees. “Sorry about that.”
They stare at each other for a long moment, until Kara lifts the heavy bag in her right hand. “Big Belly?”
Lena’s features warm.
“I knew there was a reason you’re my favorite.”
#this took me all day#you're welcome#kinda lost steam towards the end#but the very end is what i really wanted to see#just a matter of getting from a to b#supercorp#cw suicide#??#i'm putting the warning there but not sure if it really qualifies#more like a self-inflicted death#less of the usual culprits that come with suicide#makes sense if you read it#but be wary if you're sensitive to it#didn't wanna leave it untagged in case it does trigger some folks#use your best judgement#read more#3.1k#i wrote dis#alt s5 ending#take 2
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one big happy family: a dream smp character analysis
in trying to make sense of what humanity dream could possibly have and/or express, i immediately began to think about dream’s relationships
of these relationships, his relationship with ranboo is one that is muddled in mystery, though its mystery seems to slowly be more revealed the more we learn about ranboo’s enderwalk state
for distinction, i will refer to the ranboo we have been following as “streamboo” and the ranboo in enderwalking state as “enderboo”; when i say “ranboo” i am referring to the whole person
according to cc!ranboo, ranboo’s memory loss problems are not inherent and that something caused it. based on what and how streamboo remembers things, my theory is that something happened to ranboo that made his memory functions change into the way it is now, existing in two different states. they function identically and reason identically, it’s just that what one state can remember, the other cannot, and vise versa. this is how our ranboo started out upon arrival.
what i believe happened is that enderboo was the first of the two states to discover streamboo and what he’s been up to. perhaps his first attempt at contacting him was through the memory book, but decided against it, hence the [REDACTED] of Page 6. this also implies that enderboo know about his other state far longer than streamboo
enderboo’s memories are different, and i think it’s obvious that enderboo’s first friendship was with dream. enderboo functions no differently than streamboo, so it’s easy to assume he pledged loyalty and friendship to dream right away, quick to understand and support dream’s plans and intentions. this is why dream took the blame for the community house, why dream trusted him with one of the discs, and why dream called him a “friend” and “servant” in the prison stream (which i’m inclined to believe is both true and untrue depending on which elements we’re discussing). it can even be argued that enderboo’s friendly relations with dream enabled dream to go as far as he did as to get imprisoned. enderboo’s relationship with dream could be comparable to streamboo’s other meaningful relationships with tommy, tubbo, phil, and techno (and at some point, fundy).
if enderboo knew about streamboo and his intentions for a while, why didn’t he try to reach out to him earlier? i’m guessing he underestimated the possible power streamboo had in being tied to so many enemies and pawns of dream. he has just as much access to streamboo’s memory books as streamboo does, getting good ideas about streamboo’s relationships. enderboo has memory book 4, as we know. i mention this because i’m inclined to believe that memory book 4 is as old as the first one, just better hidden because he felt that streamboo didn’t need to know about him at the time.
more theories about enderboo is that he may be the state of ranboo most like what ranboo was like before incurring memory loss. evidences of this would be:
being more in-touch with the enderman half moreso than streamboo, via speaking in ender and disappearing so mysteriously it could be interpreted as teleportation
having more agency over the body.
a display of stronger backbone, opinions, and knowledge through obvious friendship with dream
proof of the second one? the dream voice + mellohi thing during the 20th of january stream + the :) trigger established through the one initially erased in the memory book, in the “Thanks :)” note, and through dream’s prison message. the dream voice was his first direct attempt to talk to streamboo, as it was through here that he communicated what he did and knew to streamboo, who as we know didn’t deal with this well. i think enderboo decided to talk to streamboo then because they came to a point of differing intentions. support dream or fight against him? you’d think that by knowing about streamboo more he’d understand streamboo’s point of view, but seems like he knows something that’s keeping him firm in his opinions instead of adopting streamboo’s. in fact, it seems like he’s trying to get streamboo to think like him. i mean, ranboo and dream want the same thing, so it’s no wonder they’d get along so well. enderboo knows streamboo is literally him and is struggling to get streamboo to reframe his perspective to one that helps and supports dream.
enderboo, based on this, is proof that dream is still capable of changing, arguably.
we know that streamboo made deliberate choices to avoid, repress, or ignore enderboo’s calls. he just wants peace. it only took a direct attack from the egg for him to be forced to recognize what enderboo was saying and doing. the egg has seen enderboo, and so have its servants (bad saw enderboo place a block on one of the vines and ant saw enderboo communicate in ender), hence its knowledge about ranboo that streamboo has been trying to repress. the crimson is making streamboo come to terms with enderboo so it would be easier to get him on its side. it did not hesistate to use enderboo’s connections with dream to guilt streamboo into submission.
point is, when the two states accept each other, we could only hope ranboo will not only provide the desire server peace, but help reform dream into being better, if it’s even possible. mizu is so damn obvious, but it could changed, if altered correctly.
#dream smp#dream smp analysis#dream smp theory#ranboo#dreamwastaken#i am fucking terrified of how true this could be#call me out by pointing at tumblr should you see it ranboo's secret tumblr
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My opinion on something in this community.
Okay, I know I said I’m avoiding opinions but I need to get this out before I continue with today fjsbfjsnsk. AFTER THIS IM TAKING A MENTAL BREAK FKSDBFSBF
Tw: Mention of respawning, death, suicide, toxic behavior, cursing and slight mention of abuse.
Heads up before I start, I want to say I am someone who believes it is possible to shift permanently and I also believe your physical body, in no way, can be affected by shifting unless you mean trauma wise because you shifted to somewhere not so mentally friendly and so on. I may change my belief depending on whether it has enough backing or makes sense, logically, to me. So if you’re reading this when i’ve changed my views then you can go “heeeeyyyyy old you” and move on from this post lmao. Anyway here we go!
This "permanently shifting is respawning" BOTHERS ME SO MUCH. I, personally, want to shift permanently because I see no future here, I have no interest here, I am not in a good home situation, and that SHOULD BE valid. To associate people who want to live a better life and live out their dreams in a safer form with something that isn't on the communities best side is going to . . .
1. Spread misinformation on the definition of respawning
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Ahem, and before I move on let's look at the definition
Respawn: (of a character in a video game) reappear after having being killed.
This could also relate to reincarnation. Let's check that definition too.
Reincarnation: the rebirth of the soul in a new body.
See also "reincarnation, also know as rebirth or transmigration of a living being begins a new life in a different physical form or body. "
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2. Not only will it spread misinformation, those who hop on the "majority belief train" might spread hate towards those who really can't stand to be here.
⚠️ Permanent Shifting and Respawning are two different things. Respawning has no definite security that you will be in your DR, it's too risky. As for permanent shifting, you simply shift and stay. There is no harm to your body or anything and you can ALWAYS come back if you decide to, something respawners cannot do. Permanent Shifting and Respawning are two different things. Comparing those two is like saying shifting in general and Respawning are the same because they both involve leaving this reality. They arent, and you know it. Just because they both stay in their DR doesn't mean they are the same. If you disagree, I have an entire server and a lot of people to back me up that it is not the same. They all agree, it's two different categories. Permanent shifting isn't always permanent and you can come back, there's no harm to you or your body. Respawning isn't guaranteed, nor can you ever come back. There is a big difference. Stop clustering. I spoke with a respawner on Amino who said that Respawning is the disposal of the body AFTER shifting and ties are severed. It is not done by then consciously. Secondly in addition to that, permanent shifting means you can always come back if you change your mind and the ties with this reality is still there. There is a big difference here. ⚠️
People who see no future here are not cruel to their families. People who, at an early age, dreamed of being somewhere else other than 'home' are not cruel. People who want to see their comfort characters and stay there, consciously, are not cruel. It. Isn't. Wrong. It isn't disgusting. It isn't mean. It isn't "mentally ill." If you see it as wrong then tough luck buddy because I don't care. Unfollow me or block me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.
ANOTHER THING THAT IS BOTHERING ME.
Those who shift permanently are not evil, cruel, or stupid. Nor are they harming their old reality/current reality body. And I do not want to hear the "you can't shift permanently without respawning" excuse. Yes, you can. Shifting your conscience has no time limit. It does not in any shape or form, in my mind, make sense logically that there is a time limit where your cr body, which shouldn't have control over you in another reality, just yeets you back.
Why does this community INSIST on just blocking respawners and giving them hate. I don't support it 100% right now, but what I'm saying is don't bash someone who needs your help?? Like I get the whole "I'm going to shift and my CR body will die right after I leave" is unsettling to a lot of people and many might be triggered by the topic. I get that. But ????? Y'all are TOXIC as hell to completely bash these people. (And if you haven’t then good for you ILY here’s a lolipop 💖🥺🍭.) Like??? Yes, you can verbally do that because it’s the internet. But should you, morally? In my opinion, no. If someone is saying they want to dispose of their body and you tell them they aren’t welcome to talk to you, then what the actually HELL.
( I get that someone randomly venting to you is frustrating and mentally draining which can cause worsened depression or a worsened mental state; always ask first before venting unless you need immediate help, kids. So to clarify, that’s not what I’m saying in this context. )
Don’t be a d*ck. Stop hating someone who may even need help. That’s TOXIC AS FUCK. I don’t CARE if you think it’s weird or gross. Belittling, excluding, bullying, etc is invalidating someone who could use information and support and that is DISGUSTANG. I DON’T CARE IF YOU DON’T LIKE WHAT I’M SAYING. Don’t hop on the majority train and stay there because you’re too afraid to voice a different opinion so now you’re going to be a d*ck. It’s not cute nor is it funny. As Michael Jordan said, “Stop it, get some help.”
All I literally ask of anyone reading this is to validate those who you know nothing about. Talk, communicate, and reach out. If you feel uncomfortable with it, that’s fine. If you feel triggered by the topic then that is also fine and VALID. Just don’t be an ass to other people who might feel the same way.
Also as a closing and before I hear “I’ve never seen this issue, you’re just starting shit” kind of thing I will have you know IT DOES HAPPEN. Especially on amino and discord servers I have been on. It does happen. It needs to stop.
Instead of bashing them and then saying they're wrong with no further explanation maybeeee you should try something more decent. For example you could explain to them what respawn is, the effects to those here, how it works, and avoid anything opinionated until they have the facts (I’m going to use facts as a loose term being that we are a small and new community and we still need more scientific backing or experiences to gain more insight). Also you should explain that YOU DONT NEED TO RESPAWN TO STAY IN YOUR DR PERMANETLY. A number one factor, that I have noticed, is they take the risk to respawn because someone failed to inform them that they didn’t need to kill themselves to stay in their DR permanently. Due to this, they take the risk because they would rather do it than ever come back to this reality which may not be kind to them at all. And that is a community failure. Instead of bashing someone who may need help, talk to them. Inform them.
⚠️ALSO FYI some people respawn for spiritual aspects but right now I'm talking about the suicidial part of the respawn community so if you're a spiritual respawner I'm not talking about that, I'm just mentioning the other part. 🧍🏻♀️⚠️
#realities#reality shifting#reality shift#shifting#reality#desired reality#ideal reality#desired#ideal#respawning#current reality#old reality#reality jumping#jumping realities#desired reality self#shifting community#reality shifting community#reality jumping community#respawning community#subliminals#loa#lifa#shiftblr#shifting realities
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