#listen to me i will NEVER

[honeybyte]

. well,

[shadesofmauve]

I want to step away from the art-vs-artist side of the Gaiman issue for a bit, and talk about, well, the rest of it. Because those emotions you're feeling would be the same without the art; the art just adds another layer.

Source: I worked with a guy who turned out to be heavily involved in an international, multi-state sex-slavery/trafficking ring.

He was really nice.

Yeah.

It hits like a dumptruck of shit. You don't feel stable in your world anymore. How could someone you interacted with, liked, also be a truly horrible person? How could your judgement be that bad? How can real people, not stylized cartoon bogeymen, be actually doing this shit?

You have to sit with the fact that you couldn't, or probably couldn't, have known. You should have no guilt as part of this horror — but guilt is almost certainly part of that mess you're feeling, because our brains do this associative thing, and somehow "I liked [the version of] the guy [that I knew]", or his creations, becomes "I made a horrible mistake and should feel guilty."

You didn't, loves, you didn't.

We're human, and we can only go by the information we have. And the information we have is only the smallest glimpse into someone else's life.

I didn't work closely with the guy I knew at work, but we chatted. He wasn't just nice; he was one of the only people outside my tiny department who seemed genuinely nice in a workplace that was rapidly becoming incredibly toxic. He loaned me a bike trainer. Occasionally he'd see me at the bus stop and give me a lift home.

Yup. I was a young woman in my twenties and rode in this guy's car. More than once.

When I tell this story that part usually makes people gasp. "You must feel so scared about what could have happened to you!" "You're so lucky nothing happened!"

No, that's not how it worked. I was never in danger. This guy targeted Korean women with little-to-no English who were coerced and powerless. A white, fluent, US citizen coworker wasn't a potential victim. I got to be a person, not prey.

Y'know that little warning bell that goes off, when you're around someone who might be a danger to you? That animal sense that says "Something is off here, watch out"?

Yeah, that doesn't ping if the preferred prey isn't around.

That's what rattled me the most about this. I liked to think of myself as willing to stand up for people with less power than me. I worked with Japanese exchange students in college and put myself bodily between them and creeps, and I sure as hell got that little alarm when some asian-schoolgirl fetishist schmoozed on them. But we were all there.

I had to learn that the alarm won't go off when the hunter isn't hunting. That it's not the solid indicator I might've thought it was. That sometimes this is what the privilege of not being prey does; it completely masks your ability to detect the horrors that are going on.

A lot of people point out that 'people like that' have amazing charisma and ability to lie and manipulate, and that's true. Anyone who's gotten away with this shit for decades is going to be way smoother than the pathetic little hangers-on I dealt with in university. But it's not just that. I seriously, deeply believe that he saw me as a person, and he did not extend personhood to his victims. We didn't have a fake coworker relationship. We had a real one. And just like I don't know the ins-and-outs of most of my coworkers lives, I had no idea that what he did on his down time was perpetrate horrors.

I know this is getting off the topic, but it's so very important. Especially as a message to cis guys: please understand that you won't recognize a creep the way you might think you will. If you're not the preferred prey, the hind-brain alarm won't go off. You have to listen to victims, not your gut feeling that the person seems perfectly nice and normal. It doesn't mean there's never a false accusation, but face the fact that it's usually real, and you don't have enough information to say otherwise.

So, yeah. It fucking sucks. Writing about this twists my insides into tense knots, and it was almost a decade ago. I was never in danger. No one I knew was hurt!

Just countless, powerless women, horrifically abused by someone who was nice to me.

You don't trust your own judgement quite the same way, after. And as utterly shitty as it is, as twisted up and unstead-in-the-world as I felt the day I found out — I don't actually think that's a bad thing.

I think we all need to question our own judgement. It makes us better people.

I don't see villains around every corner just because I knew one, once. But I do own the fact that I can't know, really know, about anyone except those closest to me. They have their own full lives. They'll go from the pinnacles of kindness to the depths of depravity — and I won't know.

It's not a failing. It's just being human. Something to remember before you slap labels on people, before you condemn them or idolize them. Think about how much you can't know, and how flawed our judgement always is.

Grieve for victims, and the feeling of betrayal. But maybe let yourself off the hook, and be a bit slower to skewer others on it.

[overlymetaromantic]

Dungeon Meshi, or as I like to call it, Marcille's-increasingly-difficult-to-ignore-revelations-that-her-endless-devotion-to-Falin-may-in-fact-be-more-rooted-in-lesbianism-than-she-originally-thought

[qualityrain]

[makesyouevil]

in dreams

[verysadlesbian]

Sky practically called Viktor a fruitcake and then faded away. That is queen behaviour.

[starcurtain]

Please someone redraw this with Dr. Ratio and Aventurine because this is the exact vibe they have in my head post-Penacony.

[mangozic]

archivist be upon ye

[bacchuschucklefuck]

no more fan-ta-sizing about it! everything's already changed~

[akynoctua]

They’re so married.

[chloesimaginationthings]

Is Michael Afton gay or European in FNAF?…

[shalom-iamcominghome]

I think the difference between myself and other religious people is that I don't see saying "oh my g-d" as being disgraceful to His name. I see saying "oh my g-d" like you're trying to get g-d's attention so you can do this:

[lotus-pear]

do you finally see me?

[hinamie]

*catboys ur shounen protag*

[socallmedaisy]

absolutely obsessed with the implications of the different versions of the ballad now we have the full picture. it really is a masterclass in songwriting.

we start with nicky's version. the road is a metaphor for death, but it's about acceptance ("tame your fears, a door appears, the time has come to go"). it resolves musically, we end on the note we began on. it's in a major key, it sounds happy. it's a fun little tune.

agatha takes this and twists it in the version that plays over the montage of her killing covens. some of the chords are the same (A and D in the chorus) but they're minor versions now. it sounds dark and sad. agatha is grieving. when the other witches join in the harmonies are sinister, adding notes from the minor key. this becomes canonised in the sacred chant version: for 260 years agatha has been stuck grieving nicky.

enter lorna wu. her version is in a different key (p sure it's E flat major at the start). there are still some minor chords but the overall effect isn't the same, it's a major key. partly this is a trick of the instruments and the rock/pop vibe but we know there's a still a mother's grief about not being able to save her child (and herself?) in there, but she's more positive about this than agatha was: she accepts her own death, and she will protect alice if she can, but ultimately the road is still a metaphor about death and everyone walks it, but this time lorna changes the lyrics (the door doesn't appear to death in this version, it appears "to love that never dies" the people we love stay with us after death). and then the bridge. now a bridge musically takes us somewhere new, quite often it signals a key change, a turning point in the lyrics, something shifting. here I think the function is to show us that lorna is not accepting of agatha's static version of the ballad that has stayed the same (unable to move past her grief). the key modulates to a minor one (I think it's A minor), it's sad as lorna tells alice that though lorna will die, she'll always be with her: "if I can't reach you... if I can't hold you, remember what I told you". I think it's significant the last chorus is "we" go down, down, down the road. everyone walks the road to death. it's part of life. agatha can't accept this, but lorna does. she'll see alice at the end.

[sabertoothwalrus]

appreciation post for the second half of dungeon meshi where senshi clearly starts treating chilchuck more like an adult. and also how the two of them start looking incredibly married