#listen im just using our most popular shit

[davekatkins]

HELLO PEOPLE WHO FOLLOW MY BLOG AND ALSO PEOPLE WHO DONT.

When you are requesting from us. Please please please;;

1. SPECIFY IN YOUR REQUEST.

Ex. "Can I have a Eridan edit-"

(What KIND of edit? Talksprite? Panel? Etc. At the least just say whatever WE want cause otherwise we get stressed thinking you might want something specific)

2. TELL US WHO ITS FOR.

Ex. "Can I have a Karkat pq edit for a fictive-"

(This one's more optional. I feel like you might not want to specify for person reason, I guess. But it would be nice to know if you are a kin or would rather be called an IRL or etc. These posts are getting kin tags but if you want it tagged as something else PLEASE ask.)

3. TAG AS KIN/ME/ETC.

Ex. "Can you please put on there for others not to tag as "KIN/ME/ID/ETC"? Thank you!"

A lot of kin blogs go to requests they didn't ask for and rb them tagging them as "kin" or "me" or "irl", and not that that's a bad thing! Just that sometimes people don't want that. If YOU don't want that. Tell us!

4. IS IT OKAY TO USE IN ICONS.

Ex. "Can I have a Dave pq edit? Please don't allow people to use in icons."

New thing now!! Apparently people like the shit we make and want to use it for icons. I'd say fuck yeah go on ahead but. I made these for other people in specifics. So maybe try to specify here haha.

[clownery-and-fuckery]

As promised, my commentary on Hunter.... to the people that like him, im sorry.

Spoiler warnings and the like, this is pretty negative aside from like maybe three sentences?? Feel free to leave you're own opinions on this too ofc !!! >:)

I dont like Hunter.

Actually, that's not entirely true, I liked him in TCW season 7, when he was that silly man who fucked droids around the place, took no shit, and loved his brothers. I like the Hunter who, not putting this nicely, had a personality.

This is not a dig on him as a character, it's a dig on how he was handled, writing wise

Listen, I totally get that the "rugged-man-adopts-a-star-child" trope is popular, and I do LOVE that trope, really I do- I just don't really think it was done that well here? It's bothered me since s1 of the Bad Batch, and I don't think it's going to get any better this season....

My only real problem with the writing inconsistency of Hunter being an older brother of three to "Omega this, Omega that" and while I agree childcare is SUPER difficult at the best of times, Hunter had four brothers who were equally capable of taking care of Omega, too. It just never sat right with me that taking care of her became his ENTIRE personality

Hes a soldier, who despite being completely out of his element, had a routine he strictly followed for the whole war. Yet he seemed to completely forget about that ?? Stressed or not stressed, that worn in routines and LIFELONG LESSONS should not have left his head as quickly as they seemed to.

The most obvious and frustrating example of the oversimplification of Hunter's character is with Crosshair. I cannot even BEGIN to describe my anger when it comes to Hunter and Crosshair. It mainly stems from the way he just FORGETS his brother is with the Empire. Conveniently never bringing it up unless someone else did it first.

As the oldest sibling and squad leader, I personally think Hunter should have been the one to bring him up. It should not have had to be specifically mentioned by another character for Hunter to discuss it. He loves his brothers, he loved Crosshair, broody or not, he should have brought it up AT LEAST once, imo.

We also see this complete disregard for Crosshair AGAIN in s3, now that we have seen Hunter looking for Omega and not ONCE mentioning Crosshair. Has he forgotten that they were originally going to find Crosshair??? That they never actually FOUND their brother ??????? Annoyed me so much, tbh.

What else annoyed me was the singular language he used during the whole episode. "She's part of our squad." "Hemlock took SOMEONE from us." He's completely and utterly disregarding the OTHER TWO SIBLINGS that the Empire took away from him !!!!! It genuinely frustrates me so much.

I know I'm DEFINITELY nit-picking here, but even when Hunter looked to Tech's goggles, it was in a "He should've been here to do this." Way, not a "He should be here." Way. That's his brother, who died looking for another that Hunter has forgotten.

Hunter's tunnel vision is probably one my least favourite things about the Bad Batch, if I dare even MENTION that- and I love this show. It means so much to me, but I just can't handle this particular part of it...

I have so SO much anger directed towards the treatment of Hunter by the writers. I want the Hunter who was devoted to his WHOLE family, who fought for ALL of them, who would have NEVER allowed Crosshair to leave in the first place. Give me that Hunter back.

(Saying this- I do not mind Hunter and Omega's father/daughter and brother/sister relationship !!! I do really enjoy it- in small amounts. The fact that Hunter became nearly an extention of Omega really just- threw me off his whole character, really)

I specifically pick to ignore this when I'm making anything. Hunter has been a sergeant of three idiots(named endearingly) for the entirety of the war. One child who wanders around should not have taken up 100% of Hunter's attention, ESPECIALLY when he was surrounded and supported. It just bothers me, idk

Anyway, thats my rant !!! Back to some positives soon, promise !! I just had to get this off my chest, it's been BOTHERING me.

[fave-fight]

ROUND 1, MATCH 9

NO MAGIC, POWERS, OR WEAPONS

Utatane Piko:

“Wow a vocaloid with an actual last name what a shocker *AHEM* Was made by Sony (yes morbius-releasing Sony made a vocaloid), was unfortunately released RIGHT NEXT TO two other way more popular vocaloids, ended up becoming half-obscure and more people know about him now that he's been discontinued. Yippee 💥”

“literally the most pathetic a boy can get discontinued (he is literally already losing) stuck in v2 forever and has no eng voicebank still assigned meme by fandom silly another vocaloid was meant to be his counterpart but they got split due to their original company going bankrupt sony hates him (yes hes owned by sony) sony please revive our baby boy :[”

“Imagine if a discontinued computer program won, just imagine, that would b cool”

“He deserves to win because he sadly probably won't ever get a voice update, and the little babyman deserves at least something good to happen to him.”

“Discontinued robot man. Let him kill.”

“ROBOT SWAG!! very skrunkly, looks really fucking tired in his official v2 art, dicontinued please give them some justice he has a beautiful voice :(”

Jonathan Sims:

“It would be really funny if he and Jonah Magnus both got in so John could literally strange his boss to death. That would be so much fun. He should lose to everyone else tho bc he is doomed by the narrative to always take the L”

“Listen. Listen this is a fistfight, im not sure if his all knowing fear god bullshit powers will work here. If he can’t smite people. If he can’t Know things about them and scare them to death. If it’s just a fistfight of pure ability. He is going to get beat up so badly but I think he’ll live. Jon’s sturdy. He had a rib taken out. Was kidnapped and forcibly moisturised by an evil ringmaster puppet. He is… the fandom interpretation is that he’s skinny. Thin. His boyfriend is the strong one. Jonathan Sims would probably lose in a fistfight -he’s Just A Guy without the antichrist shit- but it would be so fucking funny. He might win. He might lose. It’s 2:18 AM here and I cannot sleep.”

“He has an endless supply of disdain and is so willing to use it Especially if there's Martin He HATES Martin Martin can do no good Let me tell you, that Martin... Wait, where'd you go?”

[whumpshaped]

Im pretty sure you're in a different part of the world then me. And you like vampires, too! So what's your local vampires lore like, assuming there is any. I'm white American, so I don't really... Have that. Native Americans didn't really have a vampire-equivalent, and even if they did, not my place to speak on it. I don't know my family heritage either, so I can't speak of any vampires from whatever culture my bloodline comes from.

bro u hit some sort of jackpot for sure. im from hungary. its in eastern europe and for a long long time transylvania belonged to hungary too. dracula, the real, historical dracula, was literally held captive here for a while. i just went to see his manor's cellar this summer w my brother. its awesome. so uh. ok. lets see what i can give u-

so hungary and hungarians used to be veeeery pagan and we did not leave that behind after converting. lots of our folklore has been lost but lots of it has remained! a significant part of it, of course, is vampires.

vampires were super popular in the medieval era, when people believed the standard stuff: vampires leave their graves at night and suck the blood of the living. they tried to avoid being preyed on by putting garlic in their windows and wearing amulets.

one of our most famous hungarian vampire figure is báthory erzsébet whom u might know as elizabeth báthory :) she was the wife (and later widow) of a hungarian nobleman, and she was rumoured to have killed hundreds of young women to then bathe in their blood and stay forever young! she became a very prominent figure in the hungarian vampire lore. of course her only sin was likely the fact that she was a girlboss ruling over the enormous land of her late husband alone, which people didnt like, so they started the rumours to be able to get that land from her. she was eventually arrested and died in her cell 4 years later without a trial.

then of course theres the dracula stuff and the fact that hungary is located in eastern europe. its honestly mostly the same as u would hear from slavic vampire myths. heavily intertwined and overlapping. hungary isnt technically slavic but its like...... u know how it is. if i go outside rn i will see a man in a wifebeater and another in an adidas tracksuit. we have pretty good vampire tourism i'd say. and obviously a shit ton of hungarians live in transylvania to this day sooo. basically we're at the heart of the vampire conspiracy.

speaking of dracula, lugosi béla was literally the most iconic dracula according to a bunch of ppl. hes hungarian!

basically.. listen im not saying i know a couple vampires and meet w them frequently to ask questions to better my story.. im just saying the likelihood of that isnt zero

[f4y3w00d5]

And to finish up for the night here is my brief description of Every Song in Danger Days: True Lives Of The Fabulous Killjoys, by My Chemical Romance

Okay so basically  this is their most recent album, 2014, and it follows the Killjoys as they fight against BL.IND (Better Living Industries) who seek to ELIMINATE all  individuality. (Spoiler: They die saving The Girl in the music video for SING) 

Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na) - 

Upbeat!!! Dancing!!! Fast!!! You jump around screaming about doing crime and partying and sex!!! I love it!!! (you should listen to it after Look Alive Sunshine, which is the intro to the album and its just Dr D speaking, and at the start of Na Na Na, it goes ‘THE FUTURE IS BULLETPROOF! THE AFTERMATH IS SECONDARY!! TIME TO DO IT NOW AND DO IT LOUD! KILLJOYS, MAKE SOME NOISE!!!’) 

Bulletproof Heart 

Uh so this is sorta less fast and stuff but its SO cool and idk how to describe it but its sorta jaunty? First song I listened to by the band!!! (Fav part is ‘and tho, I know, how much you hate this. Are you gonna be the one to save us? From. The black. And hope-less feelin. Will you meet ‘em when the end comes reelin? Hold, your heart, into this darkness. Will it ever be the light to shine you out? Or fail. And leave you stranded? I aint gonna be the one left standin. You aint gonna be the one left standin, and we aint gonna be the ones left standin!!!’) 

SING 

Aaaaaaaaa this ones so cool, took a bit to grow on me, its mostly slow and repetitive but the BRIDGE ‘Cleaned up corporations PROGRESS! Dyin in the PROCESS! Children that can TALK ABOUT IT livin on the WEB-WAYS, people movin SIDEWAYS, sell it til your LAST DAYS, buy yourself the motivation GENERATION NOTHIN! Nothing but a DEAD SCENE! Product of a WHITE DREAM! I am not the SINGER THAT YOU WANTED BUT A DANCER! I REFUSE TO ANSWER! TALK ABOUT THE PAST SIR! WROTE IT FOR THE ONES WHO WANNA GET AWAY! ……. Keep runnin.’ 

Planetary (GO!)  

Okay so like omg. I love this one. Everythings amazin. Starts off slightly slow, and then starts movin faster around the verses? AND THE VIBES!!! Ive got a few favs and ill save them here (I love the way theyre said too-) ‘Ladies and gentleman, truth is now acceptable! Fame! Is now injectable, PROCESS THE PROGRESS, This core is critical, faith is un-a-vail-a-ble, Lives, become incredible-‘ and also ‘Youre unbelievable, ah, so unbelievable, ah, you ruin everything, oh, you better GO HOME! Im unbelievable yeah, im undefeatable yeah, LETS RUIN EVERYTHIN, BLAST IT TO THE BACK ROW- they sell presentable, young! And so ingestible! Sterile and collectable! SAFE, and I cant STAND THAT! This is a letter, by word, is the beretta, the sound, of my vendetta against, the ones that PLANNED IT!’ So uhhhhhhhhh yeah lol 

The Only Hope For Me Is You 

Likeeeeeeeee holy SHIT this one just sorta- idkkkk- ‘Where? Where were you when, all of the embers fell? I still remember them… covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends, I still… think of the bombs they built- IF THERES A PLACEEE THAT I COULD BE, THEN ID BE ANOTHERR MEMORY, CAN I BE THE ONLY HOPE FOR YOU? BECAUSE YOURE THE ONLY HOPE FOR ME! AND IF WE CAN FIND WHERE  WE BELONG, WE’ll Have To make It on our own!! Face all the painnn and takeee it on, because the only hope for me, is you alone…’ its one of the slower ones tho 

Party Poison 

This one starts in Japanese for some reason??? Its hard to explain… another fast and dancy type one ig, but sorta raw-er?  Its sooooooo weird- not one of my favs but its semi popular 

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back 

Okay so idk how to describe this really- sorta gives Only Hope type thing but faster and sorta rockier? Idk. My fav parts tho!!! ‘Get offfff the ledge, and drop the knife… Not a victim of a victims life! Because… this aint a room fullla suicides- WE’RE BELIEVERSS I BELIEVE TONIGHT-‘  OH AND ONE OF THE MORE POPULAR LINES PEOPLE KNOW ‘Ill tell you well how the story ends, where the good guys die and the bad guys win… (WHO CARES?)- THIS AINT ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE, BUT THE GRAFFITII THEY WRITE ON YOUR GRAVE-‘ then the last two ‘Im the only friend that makes you cry! Youre a heart attack in black hair dye! So just save yourself, and Ill hold them back tonight….’ And ‘We can live forever if you’ve got the time- YOU MOTHERFUCKER (OHHHWHOAAAA) Youre the broken glass in the mornin light! Be a burnin’ star if it takes all night!’ 

S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W 

OHOHOH APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS TO SOOTHE THE KIDS WHEN THE NUCLEAR BOMBS HIT AND GET THEM INTO THE SHELTER!!! (yes there are nuclear bombs, its post apocalyptic lmao) I love the bridge- ‘Love, love, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this… bomb……. Run, run, bunny, run. Run, run, bunny ruuuuuuuuuuun’ One of the slowest in the album also 

Summertime 

Okay so this is prolly my fav? Idk how to describe it tbh….. I know what it describes for me buuuut you don’t wanna hear me be weird about people……. Ill just tell you my fav parts (that I relate to!!!) ‘Terrified of what I’d be, as a kid from what Ive seen… Every single day when people try and put the pieces back together, just to smash them down… turn my headphones up real loud…. I don’t think I need them now…. Cos you stop the noise!!!’ 

DESTROYA 

………………fucked up robot song where you scream and moan. What else is there to say? (the porn bots In the story worship a ‘god’ called Destroya who will supposedly come save them) 

The Kids From Yesterday 

I love this one too. Sorta slow ig. Nostalgic maybe? ‘Well now, this could be the last of all the rides we take…. So hold on tight and don’t look back……… we don’t care about the message or the rules they make…. Ill find you when the sun goes black…..’ 

Vampire Money 

Dance!!! Sex!! Upbeat!!! Fast!!! ‘Three two one, we came to FUCK-‘ and my other fav line ‘and get your finger on the trigger tap the barrel of the gun! Hair back, motherfucker, jet black, SO COOL-‘ 

@terrencetheshark14 you might be interested in my weird ass mcr related ramblings

[the-epitome-of-sunsets]

you called?

testing, testing. jakob's my idiot of a brother, and i love sunsets.

call me dawn | she/they | istj | questioning | extrovert | not religious | minor | may 15 | taurus | dating this idiot called kyle | darci scott | a certified judo flipper | popular kid | warrior maiden | dyscalculia | | hopeless romantic | hot people on my mind 24/7 | insane soul | half greek half african-american | green eyed dad girl | am a hoe- accept it | nobility | cabin 7 gurl | slytherin | candor | the most noble of the knights | chronically online | public school kid | youngest child | forsenics | sunsets, sunsets and more sunsets

DNI IF: pro-israel, zionist, homophobic, islamophobic, antisemetic, proshipper, religiophobic, xenophobic, transphobic, ableists, anti-blm, porn bot, pro-facist, MAPs, NSFW, racist, sexist, creep, or if you want me to judo flip you :)

fandoms: tales of arcadia, riordanverse, harry potter, marauders, avatar the last airbender, ghosts (bbc), ghosts (us), merlin bbc, boarders, four o'clock club, get even (bbc), creeped out, owl house, grishaverse, and kotlc

music: taylor swift, ariana grande, stray kids, one direction, conan gray, olivia rodrigo, rosendale, lewis capaldi, ava max, billie eilish, miley cyrus, bob marley, tate mcrae, MKTO, alan walker, alexander stewart, nico collins and ed sheeran

hobbies: judo, netball, football, fencing, ballet, fitness, underthinking shit, tumblr, pinterest, embroidery, painting, listening to music, guitar, reading, being a material girl, swearing and cussing, and judo flipping my brother

personal tags:

#the epitome speaks- if i need to speak

#the epitome rants- vent stuff

#tsunami whirls- about jakob

#this punk ass bitch- about cassie

#lightning shatters- about siya

#im going to kill this jock- about my bf kyle

#my beloved moots

I support Palestine. If you don't, you better run, because I will track you down and shoot you with the gun I hide in the basement. If you don't, you're a zionazi- end of story.

@that-one-clotpole & @the-ocean-is-inside-of-me thank you for the help with blog aesthetic <3

I share an account with @the-punk-and-the-jock too <3

Hey! I'm Dawn. I'm a minor, and I decided to join this hellsite, because of my brother- @the-ocean-is-inside-of-me. I thought it would be best to watch over him, and also because I wanted to see what exactly Tumblr has it in for me. You see, I'm the granddaughter of a Greek mafia boss, and I've seen... interesting things. Let's see how crazy this hellsite can get. My ask box is open, as well as my DMs, if you wanna talk, have any concerns or if you just wanna be friends! Oh, and don't you dare try to hurt my brother, or our friends, because if I do, you're invoking the wrath of the ✨judo flipper✨. I think that's all from me! Stay safe, little people on my phone. Dawn, signing out.

[kenobster]

can you explain the appeal of these ship polls to me?

genuinely asking bc i really don’t get why they happen so often or why people take them seriously. it feels like all they do is breed conflict.

what makes everyone feel so strongly about the winners, especially if it doesn’t actually represent the true popularity of the ship? (not that popularity matters bc if it’s fun then it’s fun and everyone is entitled to their feelings and opinions)

not mad or trying to be mean, i genuinely want to understand bc im bad with social cues and at reading people. what is it about them that you like? <3

so like this is actually super funny to me lol because everything you just described has been EXACTLY how I feel about sports (especially regarding American football fans in the United States). I've actually joked a couple times already about how (thanks to this poll) I finally understand what the big deal about the Superbowl is. In fact, over the last week, I've felt a kinship with overworked cashiers who use their fifteen-minute breaks to check the score throughout the day. Every time one of the previous polls taken an unexpected swerve, please picture me jumping up and down and hollering at my computer like I'm some middle-aged white dad yelling at some referee. 😆

My state has two college football teams, both with avid fanbases, and people get SO up-in-arms about it. Even after finding out I have no interest in sports, people have threatened to commit bodily harm against me if they ever catch me wearing merch of the wrong side's team. To be honest, I'm with you — I've always found that kind of attitude to be super aggressive and needlessly rude. Unfortunately.... 😖(insert my walk of shame lol) I have recently acquired an understanding of the psychology behind it....

In other words, I think your confusion is very similar to my confusion about sports. Sports fans, especially in my state, always seem like they would really consider it a dealbreaker if I wear the wrong merch or that they would really punch me in the face if I show support for the wrong team (which does happen to people at some sports games, but I think it's a minority of sports fans who would ever do that). Most of the time, if you get upset by jokes like that, the other person will drop the act and reassure you. But sports fans will never admit they're kidding. 🙄

Anyway, with that context, I think you first must untangle the phrase "people take [shipping polls] so seriously." The truth is that we're not taking it seriously, but, like sports fans, our humor and social cues are probably difficult to read. Especially for someone not "in on the joke," we might look like we're all upset and riled up. We might say things that sound serious and aggressive. But inwardly, we're actually all laughing about it. None of us really care about the results, we're just here to have a good time playfully arguing our sides.

You're probably still wondering why anyone would find enjoyment out of this, so I think it will help if you re-contextualize it into a framework more familiar... Why do people enjoy roller coasters when the purpose of a roller coaster is to trigger your body into a fight-flight response? Why do people watch horror movies or go into haunted houses when the purpose of them is to scare the shit out of people? Why do people enjoy watching or listening to true crime drama when the stories showcase the most barbaric and cruel forms of human nature? Why do people read AITA threads on Reddit, even though they often depict the wildest examples of abuse/toxicity/etc. in human relationships?

It's because all of those examples allow a person to experience stress/terror/anger/etc. in a way that is safe. Roller coasters don't actually kill you. Horror movies have a pause button. Scary things in haunted houses are the work of prop designers and actors. True crime media and AITA threads involve stories that are happening to other people, not you. Similarly, in shipping polls, I think people enjoy having a safe way to channel their feelings about fandom rivalries in a way that is mostly harmless.

Whatever the reason for our enjoyment, however, I think once you realize that none of us actually care about the results, everything else starts to click into place. But here's some answers to your other questions:

Why do we care about the results when they're never accurate? Because we never cared about the results in the first place, hahaha. We care about what's funny. We care about what makes for the juiciest drama. (I mean, think of how funny it was when that final bracket on the Best Star Wars Character poll resulted in victory for Sebulba instead of Obi-Wan! Lmao!) In short, accuracy is boring. Bribing, cheating, and begging in order to skew results is hilarious.

Why are we so mean and hostile to each other? Because we're not actually being mean and hostile to each other.* We're teasing each other. The same way as two best friends might tease each other (example from one friend to another that I literally saw this morning: "oh my god you are SUCH a nerd 😂"). That kind of teasing doesn't work if somebody cares about the subject matter (for example, that joke would NOT be okay if the aforementioned "nerd" had ANY negative feelings about that word). But in the right circumstances, this kind of teasing can feel REALLY good, REALLY fun, and even increase feelings of security within the friendship! In shipping polls, people are probably just exhibiting the communal version of this.**

Why do people care so much about the winners? I don't actually know the answer to this because this is my first time ever enjoying a ship poll, and we haven't gotten there yet. 😅Someone feel free to pitch in.

Why do they happen so often? Probably clout. Beyond that, in order to make a poll, someone has to genuinely be curious about the results. They can theorize, but they can't know what the outcome will be. Not only that, they have to remember that tumblr polls are all fun and games (or else, imagine how incredibly infuriating it would be to see people trolling). People who want accurate results don't use tumblr polls for a reason; they use official surveys instead. In this shipping poll, OP wrote a rule for each round that the results weren't meant to be taken seriously. So I think they enjoy it for the same reasons as we do. That kind of thrill can be addicting lol, and I can see why people would want to recreate it again and again.

In closing, it's been fun, but I don't think another poll like this will similarly compel me. This has just been a one-time thing that I was able to enjoy because of certain circumstances that overlapped with my interests and sense of humor. In truth, I get just as annoyed at the frequency of these polls, and I will likely need a lifelong cooldown after this one concludes. Frankly, if I'd remembered that the final round would be for a week instead of a day, I might have.... well, I might have made different decisions to say the least, lmao.

[*] This is not inclusive of antis. There is no reason to shit on one ship exclusively when there are 5+ other ships in the running. There is especially no reason to threaten the other side with an "electric chair with a built-in guillotine" if they win. That's not fun and games. That's just fucked up.

[**] Because it's a communal version and not a close friendship, it's definitely hard to gauge people's feelings about whether they're okay with being teased. A comment, to one person, might sound like teasing, but, to another, might come across as hurtful and mean. Only intimate friends can really tell the difference (and even they make mistakes). This is definitely unfortunate, but it's kind of a consequence of human behavior in general — not something specific to these kinds of polls imo.

[turtlemagnum]

i think my first exposure to AI art might've been this video where somebody was testing out this new, weird thing where they automatically generate a song using AI, and i couldnt help but feel that it was an indictment of the modern music scene that a goddamn computer could effortlessly and accurately replicate the generic swill that passes for popular music nowadays. didnt have a vocalist synthesized yet but those have been becoming a thing too, or so i hear.

i saw a little article about how the newer generations of gamers are turning more and more to retro games. as somebody technically belonging to the "newer generations" this felt self evident, as frankly most of the gaming i do nowadays is almost invariably in an emulator. i think that to a certain extent, most of the best mainstream games that are going to be made already have been, at least for the forseeable future of major developers with games made scientifically perfect for milking you for the most money possible rather than as an art form. im sure it's all gonna collapse in on itself eventually, from what i hear some of the older folks who lived through more than i have we've been here before. hell, pretty much anybody who cares even a bit about gaming history knows first and foremost about the gaming crash of the early 80s, mostly spurred on by the temporal equivalent of modern cheap asset flip garbage that floods most stores these days. it's hard not to feel like we're about to see a massive crash yet again, with the ones inheriting the earth being the little fellas, and of course nintendo. which, makes sense, their earliest history is of weathering shit just like this, of course they'd know when to spot enshittification and stay clear of it. i'm in no way saying that nintendo is exempt of being a shitty corporation, but i will say that from a business standpoint they're one of the only ones i know of that actually seem to understand the idea of sustainability on a broad scale. hell of a lot better than the likes of activision, thats for damn sure. but back to what i was actually trying to get at before i adhd tangent'd, i think it makes a lot of sense that when the majority of the shit being put on the market is corporatist, design by comittee, prefab trash with aggressive monetization and a consistent attitude of fixing any problems in patches, it makes a hell of a lot of sense that we'd go back to our roots. NES mario is the same as its ever been, has been for over 30 years, and will be in another 30. you dont gotta worry about them patching it to make it actually function as advertised, or patching it from being something you enjoyed into something you hate, or having fomo marketing based microtransaction bullshit. the most that's gonna change is that every now and again, nintendo will make the only version they give not have flashing lights for epileptic folks, or patch out mike tyson because he sucks and replace him with a white guy, and the white guy's less hard but thats ok because it's still pretty hard, and either way it's a good game, fun, and you can still find the original on rom sites and also probably ebay if you dont have a vpn but do have a disposable income, so dont worry about it. getting sidetracked again, ANYWAYS-

what i wanted to get at is that i wonder if we're gonna see a similar resurgence in other old kinds of media just like, in general, for the mainstream. like why watch the 22nd reboot of ghost busters when the originals are right there. king crimson's still good, why dont you listen to them instead of bemoaning how your new favs are problematic, even though i dont think fripp can reclaim the fag slur (im gay, i can it's fine). i've recently been watching fist of the north star and original dragon ball, ilike the m. there are books. lots of those, actually,. you can read em! if you have the attention span. i honestly think we might be seeing more and more of this, now that im looking out for it. like i see just like, random people mention how much they like prog rock or 1930s dracula. relatively normals talk about how they like lemon demon these days. those stupid aestheticized classic anime accounts on twitter get sososo many likes. can you tell im sleep deprived writing this? i can, and im writing thjis. im writing this SO HARD. send poast.

[trickstarbrave]

i saw some people bitching on tiktok about art/commission prices again and i feel like ranting

idk why someone got it in their heads all artists are upper class rich folk trying to scam you out of something that isn't hard at all for us to make. art takes time and energy--time and energy we could literally spend doing ANYTHING else. we could be spending time with our loved ones, working a regular job with reliable pay and better benefits, or even just making art WE want to see. most of us are working class or poor.

"but you could charge less and get more customers" who the hell wants to work more for less pay. genuinely. would you rather work 90 hours for 10 bucks an hour or 40 hours for 35 bucks an hour? like get real. past a certain point of popularity you will be literally unable to keep up with commissions bc you cannot physically make them fast enough and stay healthy so higher prices mean you can dedicate more time to people who want it more

"well your art isnt even GOOD" if someone's art isnt your taste or technically worth it to you then dont buy it. to really get good at commissions you do have to build an audience and if they havent then they'll figure out they need to improve or network/promote more. you bitching about it isnt helping them figure it out any faster, and you bitching to artists who DO reliably get commissions at that price makes you look like a whiny brat

"but you COULD charge less and still survive. that means youre scamming people" listen i know you are used to be catered to by large corporations who can use literal slave labor to make things dirt fucking cheap but ethical labor costs more. we are not large corporations with big art machines shitting out subpar garbage you can buy off the rack. you are asking for handmade, customized things from someone in a place with a higher cost of living. we cannot and will not bend over backwards to appeal to the lowest common denominator. see above: we have better things to be doing with our time and this shit costs time and labor to produce. if you dont want a handmade custom art piece or dress or jewelry consider buying from shein then you cheapskate and get out of this market.

because, see above: we have better things to be doing. you are the one asking me to spend my free time making you something because you want it supposedly. i could instead be making things i like. i have the luxury too where if i dont wanna do something i dont have to. i dont have to pick up extra work for you. other artists can find other customers that arent you. if YOU want something you should make it worth the artists wild. no i dont wanna do a full custom painting for you for 40 dollars. i would barely get out of bed for 40 dollars. if i told you to clean my whole house for 10 dollars and deep clean it you would probably tell me im insane and you're not gonna do all that work for 10 god damn dollars. 10 dollars wont even pay for the cleaning supplies.

i dont take commissions anymore specifically bc i kept getting burnt out. i felt i had to make it cheaper to get more when in reality all it did was make more work with little reward. i didnt feel happy making art anymore. it became a chore, and i didnt wanna make anything for myself after i spent hours and hours making other stuff for other ppl. im lucky enough now to have a corporate job with more free time so i can get paid enough to survive and still make art. if i ever decided to again i would probably price it rly high bc tbh. if you want me to make you a custom piece i dont rly wanna draw you had better make it worth the soul crushing work that is turning a passion of mine into a profit.

and lastily with the "you could charge less and still survive" artists deserve to not only survive but thrive. artists deserve free time to make what they enjoy and have other hobbies. artists deserve to not have to work overtime to have stuff in savings. you do too in fact as a non-artist, but attacking artists for wanting that and trying to make it a reality that they get paid not just a survival wage but a FAIR wage is not actually helping anyone.

[theotherseapancakes]

Very entertaining to me how one of the most popular tumblr posts I have is me yelling (sleep-deprived) about Chrom's insecurities.

(I rambled this got long im sorry.)

Slightly, SLIGHTLY less funny that it constantly reminds me that was the day a bird broke into our house and refused to leave, though, which is funny, in a horrible way. Because Chrom attracted a Robin, I guess, IDK. It was a small one. (It was not funny at the time. Literally nobody would help us we called EVERYWHERE just had to make our poor roommate come home.) I get notes on that one so often. I feel like Chrom's insecurities SHOULD be obvious, but maybe they're not AS obvious as I thought? Hrmmm. Food for thought. ... I'm putting this on main because I'm scared it'll also blow up somehow--but while I'm here, I'm also thinking about how FEA has some really good leitmotif useage. Like, I think anyone if they just listened to the OST will notice the obvious Id ones (which I tend to feel belong to Robin, as the protag, which makes sense to a degree, but Chrom too) but I feel like rambling specifically about something dumb. Say how "Such Bonds Are The True Strength of This Army" has such a simple melody that gets reused in so so many pieces. It's really good stuff; Nintendo music is always leitmotif heavy in the best ways but it's not absent here. It makes the game feel cohesive to me. Also I can't think of many times I've heard the notes to Id Purpose also in other songs. It's present in Sorrow for obvious reasons but I still just. Gosh, I fucking love this game. I know it's a mess, I know it has issues. I know, I know. But fuck if it doesn't compel me. I don't ask much of my fiction. Just engross and compel me. Sell me on your characters. And I can't deny awakening does that. Sitting here rotating Robin in my head and Chrom and thinking about how their relationships really do mean the difference between so much. Grima is so lonely (the latest FB event makes this doubly obvious I would say) and Robin is so surrounded by friends and allies. That shit hurts. Like, imagine if you made all these friends only to be told by the universe, hey, no, fuck you, giant dragon time. Anyway everyone should go play the gay awakening mod and also my game about anime chess people, it was the one that introduced easy mode gdi. GO PLAY IT PLEASEI M ON MY KNEES CRYING AND BEATING THE FLOOR.

[plague-of-insomnia]

Man it reminds me of this meme

Like idk, im a younger millennial, and it was still very normal for our parents to beat us. So normal in fact, that it was expected (what do you MEAN you dont beat the shit out of your kid for misbehaving!?)

If taboo stuff was normalized... We wouldn't call it taboo.

If somebody wrote a shota x adult, it wouldn't have underage, or the tags, it would just be whatever gender pairing like m/m. there would be no acknowledgement whatsoever, or anywhere near the tags. It would just be a thing in society "so whens your boyfriend getting outta grade school" with the same dival of "so hows the weather"

But no, anti's wanna act like warnings are condonement for the material. Instead of like, warnings.

We dont put hairspray in the oven because it has "WARNING" talking about not to do that, and go obviously these people condone putting hairspray in the oven. (Or try to pass off responsibility like No The hairspray company is the reason my house exploded despite the clear warnings! I just didnt listen!)

Im ranting in here but seriously- anywy-

Hi eyeböll 🥺💕

Nope you’re absolutely right and I’ve seen others make the same point.

When someone tags their story with warning tags, that means they’re aware that the content is “bad.” In a sense it’s like how it used to be “warning, this fic has slash” bc that was considered by many to still be “wrong” or “gross” or even enough to get a fic nuked.

If someone thinks underage is 100% fine and normal and acceptable IRL, then why bother with a warning for it? Granted, sometimes I’ll add warnings when I personally don’t feel they’re necessary, but I like to err on the side of caution.

But yeah, antis like to argue that violence and murder is OK in fiction bc “everyone knows that’s wrong/bad” but underage or adult/minor (even aged up) isn’t bc not everyone knows pedophilia is wrong. (I have seen this exact argument, almost verbatim.)

But the thing is, most people agree that actual pedophilic behavior and (sexual) abuse of children is wrong. Yet you still see plenty of people commit murder or physically assault people IRL, and you still have a segment of parents and educators who believe in “spare the rod, spoil the child” to this day. (Yeah my parents hit us too, though I’m older.)

Antis arguments have more holes than Swiss cheese, and that’s partly bc they don’t know the meaning of the words they use (like “normalization” or “pedophilia”) and bc their whole movement is actually based on confounding disgust with morality rather than an actual logical argument.

They don’t like something, it makes them personally uncomfortable, and instead of avoiding that content, they just wanna remove all harm. And ofc that only applies to sexual content, because antis are hypocrites who don’t realize they’re parroting far right, extremist religious crap rather than being the “progressives” they believe to be.

It’s also ridiculous because a fan fic with a few thousand hits is not gonna normalize shit. If fiction affected reality so directly and extremely as antis claim, then half the world would be fucking their sisters after the popularity of Game of Thrones. But ofc they don’t attack HBO bc they have lawyers and such to shut anyone down, but some lone fan fic writer is an easy target.

(Not to mention if someone is sooo impressionable that reading one fan fic is gonna convince them of x being acceptable and OK, the problem is with THEM and not the fan fic. Because no matter what antis say, unless you’re like… 5 years old, you should have the maturity level to deduce that fiction is not something you should be taking life lessons from directly.)

Antis are bullies, plain and simple, who want control, and are too dense to realize the consequences of their behavior.

<3

[puppymuttelias]

1. First one that came to my head was Paris from The Dummys Dummy on webtoonwho is great but id probably say the 12th doctor from doctor who hes awesome

2. Lighter

3. Neverrr my windows are never ever open

4. A lot of them honestly

5. Hazel

6. Autism

7. Hair ties

8. 0

9. Id say cold cus im assuming its iced

10. If theyre shit people absolutely but if theyre good rich people then no

11. Not too sure maybe volleyball or drums i dont play volleyball but id like to

12. So boiling hot i was getting cooked alive earlier

13. 3 hours ago atleast

14. Sometimes

15. Nope

16. Nuh uh

17. Nearsighted 100% i cannot see shit

18. Nothing honestly

19. Sure, itd be shit but i definitely would if you asked

20. Neither i just say the brand name

21. That most of my emotions were super over exaggerated and my real feelings would literally just show as a straight face 😭

22. Idk how to describe myself, i guess im quite anxious

23. Love it purely cus i sleep better

24. Listening to music and maybe smoking

25. Dont really use any of that

26. Playing games with people in a very specific way (an example is the way blarg, smii7y, soup, dooo and the rest of them lot play games with each other)

27. Less than 10

28. No im asthmatic lmao

29. Hot

30. Theres a glass but surprisingly theres not anything else in here

31. Metal and stuff that was super popular in like 2014 when glmvs were around more

32. Yes

33. Dont remember

34. Grenade in the Gravy by TheDooo

35. Gmt/Bst

36. Once

37. My best friend who i met when i was 2

38. Idk

39. No but i own nivea ones i used the raspberry one the most out of them all when i did use them

40. Yeah

41. Iced with caramel

42. Spotify my beloved ♡

43. I loveeee spicy food

44. RISHI SUNAK

45. Nope :3

46. Assuming you mean halloween type of holiday lmao, probably christmas chronicles and scream (for Halloween) i love scream ive almost watched all of them i only need 1 more then ive watchee all the scream movies my favorite is the first one though

47. "Actually so real you should do that, go buy a gun" referring to a message saying that our dm should hold our other players at gun point to get them to play dnd

48. I think i was around 8 or 9 my dad gave me a sip of rum (IN PUBLIC BTW) cus i was thirsty

49. No

50. If you want but i might not look at it lmao

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[traumaalchemy]

A letter to my ex (unedited)

14/11/2008

" We'll always be freaks and we'll never be like other people, and

you'll never be a freak because your just too perfect "

My room is so charged in the most silent depths of the night

Charged with this pulsating energy

It vibrates and it probes

Sending volts charging through my heart like lightning

The slightest movement, the slighest concave or change in frequency will

catch my eye

I close my eyes and yearn for sleep, but im filled with pictures of you

and images of losing you again.

I said I could contend with it, but that doesn't mean it wouldn't slice

my heart apart

Im used to the hurt, I can handle the darkness and the emptiness.

But im not used to the clarity and the reality. The raw and harsh

throbbing of heartache.

But that's me, I can adjust to anything that is thrown in my direction,

You learnt to live in contempt.. You can learn to live with anything

else

You are sheltered and were raised in fear of discipline. I was sheltered

and afraid as well.

I was prodded around, my mind was pryed, I couldn't tell the truth, I

denied the truth existed, "never underestimate the power of denial".. It

really does delude somebody.

The shit really started getting heavy at the beginning of high school.

Do you know that I was so ashamed of who I was that I lied to everyone

and told them I didn't live in rouse hill, all because one guy told me

it was a "shithole"

I was desperate to fit in, desperate beyond belief. But at the same time

I was dispositioned and ostrasized for my differences.

I could never find a group of people who I could be myself around

because people scared me so much

I bit my tounge and followed everybody else

I watched how the world saw me, and I interpreted it accordingly

In year 7 as I was standing outside class waiting to go inside, I said

something to make this girl jessie who has just begun talking to me

laugh. Jessie was popular, outspoken, gorgeous and didn't really care

about anything at all.

She had been bitching about this fat kid in our class called jake, and

he overheard her and he thought it was me

I remember his words clearly as he spun around "danielle, your such a

try hard. Stop trying so hard nobody likes you your a loser"

My comeback was telling him to sign up for weightwatchers.

But as those words left his mouth I bit my lip hard to hold back tears,

inside I felt as though id been poisoned. I felt like I had just been

slapped across the face.

What other people thought of me was the biggest fear I had. I wanted to

bend over backwards and impress. But now I knew what I thought everyone

thought of me I would never speak out again. I couldn't handle the 

confrontation.

So I left that popular group and went to sit in the atypical loser

group. I may of been overlooked in the general population but when I was

placed next to the girls from this group I stood out as being pretty.

I found a place by being in that group.

The weirdos, the nerds, the losers, the outcasts, the overweight and

ugly acne ridden freaks. Every stereotype assosciated with that was

within that group.

We live in a shallow and sick world. To society, appearance is

everything. If your pretty and seemingly well spoken people listen to

you when you demand a fragment of attention.

Especially people who reside lower than you on the social scale at

school.

So there I found the place I resided until I broke apart in year 10 and

conformed.

But in this group I was seen as the superior because I was prettier and

more popular, but after a couple of days my eccentricities compelled the

interests of these people. I believed I was a raccoon. I had nicknames

for everyone according to what animals and objects they resembled

physically. I made up songs about teachers I didn't like and they loved

that, because I was physically normal, they went along and fell in love

with this little bit of weirdness.

And in turn I fell in love with the attention they praised me with.

But my friends didn't know me, the real me anyway. But I knew them.. I

turned a blind eye to this knowledge, acted dumb and pretended to be

just like them, ignored the problems that went on behind closed doors

and chased normality.

Only my bedroom walls saw the essence of who I was. I had an imaginary

friend , one of those little happy meal toys. The count from sesame

street. Everywhere he went, i was and I would quite literally hold

conversations with this toy. Yes, even at 13 years old.

The only freedom I had was riding my bike around the neighbourhood so

the count and I would have adventures together almost everyday.

Because I was too scared to have one on one adventures with another

person. In a group situation, I could control. But the moment it was

just me and one of my friends I let them control and dictate. I was

scared shitless of them not liking my suggestion. So I held back and

went along with whatever they wanted to do.

Thinking back, I hated one on one. I would always find myself doing

something I really had no desire to be doing.

In year 8 I went to sleepover at this girl nicoles house, I was taking

an anti depressant at the time and my mum told her mum to make sure I

took my medicine.

When they asked what it was for I told them I had really bad hayfever.

I dreaded taking those anti depressants. I dreaded the doctor visits.

When I went I would clam up and refuse to talk. My mum did all the

talking, I sat there and denied everything.

I could not bear the confrontation, I liked the denial so much. I liked

to pretend I was this normal 13 year old girl.

But at home I couldn't escape it.

One of the first disorders I suffered from was obsessive compulsive

disorder, one of the behaviours I engaged within was excessive cleaning

and organising. If something wasn't in place I would throw it in the

bin.

Living with 5 other people, nothing was ever always in place. So

mysteriously my dad lost paperwork he left lying around, my brothers

footballs and shit dissapearred. My mums things, maddis things. Anything

out of place irritated me into a frenzy, a frenzy so strong It would bug

me all day. The idea of coming home to unorganization was unbearable. I

spent my afternoons and weekends cleaning, sorting, arranging everything

into proper order. Throwing away things I didn't like. It drove everyone

crazy for months.

But to me, that was normal.

I was on zoloft throughout year 7, the first medication. Towards the end

I started to begin puberty.

I was so scared.

I started to develop, so I duck tapped my boobs down so it looked like

they didn't exist.

I went from being 29kg, to 45kg. In a matter of months, so I started

starving myself and exercising excessively.

I told myself it was for summer.

But for years I obsessed with my weight, and the scales. Food and

dieting.

I wanted to weigh 38 kgs, that was my goal. I remember staring at skinny

girls and idolizing them. I did exercise every morning and night.

I punished myself when I overate.

Again, I hid my food in napkins and threw it down the toilet after

dinner.

Id go well for a few days, and then id binge. I would then punish myself

with excessive exercise.

It was a vicious cycle

I secretley stopped taking the zoloft not knowing the dangers or

implications.. Towards the end of year 8.

I just wanted to be normal. None of my friends had to take medication,

so why should I?

But then I developed an obsession with picking pimples and scabs and

pretty much any lump on my skin needed to be prodded and tweezed and

squeezed.

At one stage my arms looked like they had leprosy.

Back to the doctor.

Another new medication, apparently the zoloft was making me aggressive.

I really started to go crazy.

The beginning of year 9, my hair was long thick and curly. My parents

didn't want me to straighten it as they were once conservative.

I saved up enough money to buy a hair straightner and I summoned up the

courage to ask my dad if I could buy one.

He told me to ask my mum and she said no.

This was the easter long weekend, I sat in my room crying for 4 days

straight. Over a fucking hair straightner. I think this was the first

time I cut myself, I have no idea what provoked me. Or where the idea

came from.

But it gave me a feeling like no other I'd felt before.

I hated my hair.

I just wanted straight long and perfect hair.

Or so I thought at the time.

I don't know the name of the medication I was on at this time, all I

remember were little pink pills each morning and night. But I started

writing morbid emo poetry and listening to the used dashboard

confessional and story of the year and taking back sunday on my

discman.

I started wearing black clothes.

Studded belts.

I was always blogging on my msn space.

Always. Every day without fail.

My parents and I did not get along at all. I was convinced they were

against me and they had installed secret cameras in my bedroom to spy on

me. I spent my weekends sitting in my room. I thought I was a lesbian

because I kissed my friend lucy at a group sleepover and I found myself

enjoying it.

I thought I had feelings for her. But I pretended to be cold and bitchy

to her. I would pick fights with her for no reason. I obsessed over her,

she had problems too. She would always be crying and moody. Nobody knew

why, but I knew that behind closed doors she was like me. Depressed.

I guess that explains the attraction. But at every group sleepover, I'd

find myself kissing her.

And loving it.

She was the first person I really had a slight attraction towards,

before her I kissed one boy and nearly vomited. I hated it.

For her ill never know what those kisses meant, we were 14 years old,

both closed off and problematic. But we never discussed this. In fact, I

was scared to be alone with her.

I was intimidated by her, but in awe at the same time.

And then daniel cox came in and my whole world was shaken around and

tipped upside down and left to suffocate.

I could never be sad around my friends.

I don't know why.

I didn't know how to express how I felt to people.

I was just blank and emotionless.

I was the entertaining and funny one.

But everyone saw me as cold and heartless..

I wasn't, and that hurt.

Every little comment hurt,

"Dani your such a bitch"

Ouch.. I really didn't mean to be

I just wanted everyone to be happy

But I have always been misunderstood

And misread

Hell, I couldn't even read myself

My parents gave me hell

Apparently I was selfish lazy inconsiderate and the list goes on.

I was never naughty at school, I would follow the rules without a second

thought

Crying tears of fear at even the slightest bit of trouble

If I did something wrong and got grounded it was horrible. I had no

computer or phone for a week. That meant no socializing. And that was

what I survived on. the knowledge I learnt from the internet. Without

that support, although I would just browse internet forums and read

about other peoples lives, without this knowledge I was an anchor headed

straight to the bottom of the ocean.

I was far to scared to ask my parents if I was allowed to go places,

because they always said no. I dreamt of the day I would be liberated.

Apparently they didn't trust me.

They would only let me go somewhere when they had interrogated the

parent of the child who I was going somewhere with.

Or unless they actually knew the parent.

I guess this ashamed me so I rarely summoned up enough courage to ask

them if I could go out. It wasn't worth the "no".

I hated that word.

Hm back to reality. Its almost 3 am and my head aches with ache? I don't

want to stop flooding this email with all these thoughts that run

through my mind, but I just need to get them out. I've never really

voiced this to anyone, I was always in denial about these things as they

happened. Blocking them out.

I know you might think you were just a stupid kid, but if I was just a

stupid kid why did I harbour up so much repressed pain deep inside. Why

did I dream of another life.

in primary school id spend my spare time drawing maps of houses and

towns, classrooms and schools. Families and imaginary characters. I'd

pretend to be them, and live out their story in my head. Wishing I was

them at that moment in my life, anything was better than reality.

I hate insomnia. I don't know why its bugging me, but it has been. I

just have so many thoughts. I know I should get some sleep now, or at

least try. Now I've gotten all this down maybe I won't try and process

it all.

I am really sorry about last night, I was overwhelmed with this strong

desire to dish out the pain. I was pushing you away just to see if you'd

still come back. Its something ill always have, I guess I just wanted to

prove you wrong as well. To me it seemed like you wanted to be

opressively enchanting, makeothers depressed. So I thought fuck you, you

can't get me to be like all those other little try hard girls. Ill show

you your not as invincible as you seem.

it does hurt me brendan.

The denial.

The mask upon your heart and then running as fast as you can from

anything remotely intimidating.

But as this email reveals, I was once exactly the same. I understand..

But complete empathy is also complete agony when we both suffer.

So I guess we have to accept the best of the bright and the darkness

which looms below it, and embrace it as it approaches us.

it hurts that you can't be with me in public

Or you don't want anyone to know about us

Its like im having a relationship with a married man with a controlling

wife

There are so many people who would gladly parade me around as their

trophy girlfriends, I know that. But everybody around you wants me shot

dead so you have to pretend I don't exist.

Am I really that evil?

I guess I slipped to far into a state of not caring after spending so

long caring and breaking my backbone bending over trying to fit in

somewhere and always failing.

The people around you had never seen you be so enfixed by one person

before. So that means im evil right?

I never really noticed how tainted my reputation was until I stopped

caring. I always pretended I didn't care, but deep down I did. But now I

notice it, I just accept it.

A lot of people want me dead, they hate me for no clear reason. But it

was not my problem, its i theirs.

I may be cocky for saying this, but im sure jealousy and confusion plays

a large role in this.

I finally found myself, and my place. I am now the person I've wanted to

be percieved as for a long time. Intimidating, yet completely

compelling. People are terrified of me! I look completely normal, but I

manage to frighten the world away.

Socially, I have a hold on everything around me. Complete control my

interpersonal relationships.

Control..

Having control is a wonderful power, I do what I want now. I say what I

want and I think what I want.

Nobody questions me, or challenges me. Its rare. Even teachers let me

be.

I am talked about, but not one word of dislike is spoken to my face..

Not at all.. It once humiliated me, but now I yearn for the

confrontation. I have the power of victory then, I know how humans tick

now, I know their weakness.

Their weakness is not belonging, being different and obscure.

Being excluded and shunned from societal norms. Being branched away from

the majority.

This is the biggest fear, but I live of the opposite because I've

managed to create my own minority in a way. The difference is I am being

completely open and honest with myself, I am not kidding myself.

I've embraced myself for who I am, a problematic, strange, psychotic,

sensitive, over emotionally unstable and exceptionally powerful person.

I could of never uncovered this without your prying and your wisdom.

Without you hand divulging deep within my soul and saving it from

jumping off the edge because it was simply different to the majority.

This difference is not a weakness. ,

I am so fucking tired right now and im assuming im talking so much shit

because whatever comes to my head is being written down.

I have so much left to say to you

I hope someday when you reach the ultimatum of your self discovery, you

send me long and intimate emails like this.

[f4y3w00d5]

Faye Fangirls About My Chemical Romance, Part 1 (Danger Days

Danger Days: True Lives Of the Fabulous Killjoys – Sorta pop punk ig, some more rocky songs

Excluding the ‘songs’ where its just talking

Okay so basically  this is their most recent album, 2014, and it follows the Killjoys as they fight against BL.IND (Better Living Industries) who seek to ELIMINATE all  individuality. (Spoiler: They die saving The Girl in the music video for SING)

Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na)

Upbeat!!! Dancing!!! Fast!!! You jump around screaming about doing crime and partying and sex!!! I love it!!! (you should listen to it after Look Alive Sunshine, which is the intro to the album and its just Dr D speaking, and at the start of Na Na Na, it goes ‘THE FUTURE IS BULLETPROOF! THE AFTERMATH IS SECONDARY!! TIME TO DO IT NOW AND DO IT LOUD! KILLJOYS, MAKE SOME NOISE!!!’)

Bulletproof Heart

Uh so this is sorta less fast and stuff but its SO cool and idk how to describe it but its sorta jaunty? First song I listened to by the band!!! (Fav part is ‘and tho, I know, how much you hate this. Are you gonna be the one to save us? From. The black. And hope-less feelin. Will you meet ‘em when the end comes reelin? Hold, your heart, into this darkness. Will it ever be the light to shine you out? Or fail. And leave you stranded? I aint gonna be the one left standin. You aint gonna be the one left standin, and we aint gonna be the ones left standin!!!’)

SING

Aaaaaaaaa this ones so cool, took a bit to grow on me, its mostly slow and repetitive but the BRIDGE ‘Cleaned up corporations PROGRESS! Dyin in the PROCESS! Children that can TALK ABOUT IT livin on the WEB-WAYS, people movin SIDEWAYS, sell it til your LAST DAYS, buy yourself the motivation GENERATION NOTHIN! Nothing but a DEAD SCENE! Product of a WHITE DREAM! I am not the SINGER THAT YOU WANTED BUT A DANCER! I REFUSE TO ANSWER! TALK ABOUT THE PAST SIR! WROTE IT FOR THE ONES WHO WANNA GET AWAY! ……. Keep runnin.’

Planetary (GO!)

Okay so like omg. I love this one. Everythings amazin. Starts off slightly slow, and then starts movin faster around the verses? AND THE VIBES!!! Ive got a few favs and ill save them here (I love the way theyre said too-) ‘Ladies and gentleman, truth is now acceptable! Fame! Is now injectable, PROCESS THE PROGRESS, This core is critical, faith is un-a-vail-a-ble, Lives, become incredible-‘ and also ‘Youre unbelievable, ah, so unbelievable, ah, you ruin everything, oh, you better GO HOME! Im unbelievable yeah, im undefeatable yeah, LETS RUIN EVERYTHIN, BLAST IT TO THE BACK ROW- they sell presentable, young! And so ingestible! Sterile and collectable! SAFE, and I cant STAND THAT! This is a letter, by word, is the beretta, the sound, of my vendetta against, the ones that PLANNED IT!’ So uhhhhhhhhh yeah lol

The Only Hope For Me Is You

Likeeeeeeeee holy SHIT this one just sorta- idkkkk- ‘Where? Where were you when, all of the embers fell? I still remember them… covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends, I still… think of the bombs they built- IF THERES A PLACEEE THAT I COULD BE, THEN ID BE ANOTHERR MEMORY, CAN I BE THE ONLY HOPE FOR YOU? BECAUSE YOURE THE ONLY HOPE FOR ME! AND IF WE CAN FIND WHERE  WE BELONG, WE’ll Have To make It on our own!! Face all the painnn and takeee it on, because the only hope for me, is you alone…’ its one of the slower ones tho

Party Poison

This one starts in Japanese for some reason??? Its hard to explain… another fast and dancy type one ig, but sorta raw-er?  Its sooooooo weird- not one of my favs but its semi popular

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back

Okay so idk how to describe this really- sorta gives Only Hope type thing but faster and sorta rockier? Idk. My fav parts tho!!! ‘Get offfff the ledge, and drop the knife… Not a victim of a victims life! Because… this aint a room fullla suicides- WE’RE BELIEVERSS I BELIEVE TONIGHT-‘ OH AND ONE OF THE MORE POPULAR LINES PEOPLE KNOW ‘Ill tell you well how the story ends, where the good guys die and the bad guys win… (WHO CARES?)- THIS AINT ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE, BUT THE GRAFFITII THEY WRITE ON YOUR GRAVE-‘ then the last two ‘Im the only friend that makes you cry! Youre a heart attack in black hair dye! So just save yourself, and Ill hold them back tonight….’ And ‘We can live forever if you’ve got the time- YOU MOTHERFUCKER (OHHHWHOAAAA) Youre the broken glass in the mornin light! Be a burnin’ star if it takes all night!’

S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W

OHOHOH APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS TO SOOTHE THE KIDS WHEN THE NUCLEAR BOMBS HIT AND GET THEM INTO THE SHELTER!!! (yes there are nuclear bombs, its post apocalyptic lmao) I love the bridge- ‘Love, love, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this… bomb……. Run, run, bunny, run. Run, run, bunny ruuuuuuuuuuun’ One of the slowest in the album also

Summertime

Okay so this is prolly my fav? Idk how to describe it tbh….. I know what it describes for me buuuut you don’t wanna hear me be weird about people……. Ill just tell you my fav parts (that I relate to!!!) ‘Terrified of what I’d be, as a kid from what Ive seen… Every single day when people try and put the pieces back together, just to smash them down… turn my headphones up real loud…. I don’t think I need them now…. Cos you stop the noise!!!’

DESTROYA

………………fucked up robot song where you scream and moan. What else is there to say? (the porn bots In the story worship a ‘god’ called Destroya who will supposedly come save them)

The Kids From Yesterday

I love this one too. Sorta slow ig. Nostalgic maybe? ‘Well now, this could be the last of all the rides we take…. So hold on tight and don’t look back……… we don’t care about the message or the rules they make…. Ill find you when the sun goes black…..’

Vampire Money

Dance!!! Sex!! Upbeat!!! Fast!!! ‘Three two one, we came to FUCK-‘ and my other fav line ‘and get your finger on the trigger tap the barrel of the gun! Hair back, motherfucker, jet black, SO COOL-‘

@mayhem-moth

[possessesnightshift]

I don't usually respond to these kinds of posts beyond the realm of the tags but like... jesus christ people are you fucking serious??

like i don't even know where to start with this reblog chain alone, not to even getting into all of the replies. i guess chronological order? (in fitting tumblr fashion lol)

ok so the poll itself. this is fine. it is very interesting for the data to show a statistically significant difference in opinion between trans women and the rest of the queer community. i am not judging this poll itself. i totally empathize with trans women who are put off by drag bc of the reasons listed further down. you can not like something that's popular within the queer community. in fact, it is important to listen to people who don't like popular things lest we all succumb to groupthink.

HOWEVER, the moment someone dares to say in the most non-confrontational manner possible "huh its kinda disappointing trans women don't get to enjoy this artform like everyone else" all bets are off.

Now that post might not have been trying to be condescending but the way its written it kind of is. i reiterate that i think trans women are valid for saying they have more negative feelings than positive based on their life experience. maybe some of these women ARE educated and still hold a negative opinion and that is totally fine. but the pushback goes beyond just that

"i already know that cis people respect drag queens more than they do transfems"

um? which cis people? cis people within the queer community? cishets? those are already two wildly different groups to sample, but apparently it's just cis people.. fine ok whatever maybe there's a point to be made about how crossdressing (an important tradition that's been a thing in the queer community for a long ass time) is easier to accept in a temporary performance than as part of a permanent stable identity. the resentment isn't a constructive thing necessarily but i get why its there. fine let's move on

"but I fucking hate how any time some shit happens with trans femme people's rights the news bring in fucking drag queens to talk about it, and they accept. we are not drag queens..."

ok immediately im done being charitable. what the fuck. what the fuck is this nonsense? why? what the fuck are you saying? oh my god.

what is the point of this harsh anti-drag queen stance? are you on the side of the anti-drag bills in congress? this is fucking extreme. do you think these bills exclude drag queens and cisgender crossdressers? do you think the transphobic us govt will just give these people a pass? do you the most homophobic cishet legislators can even differentiate between a trans woman and a drag queen and a cisgender gay man and a bisexual man who happens to be a twink? ALL of these people fall under the umbrella of icky sinful queer. all of them. which is the entire reason we need solidarity in the first place. i can get being frustrated (which is all the original poll really measures) but this goes beyond that. this is about the question what do with we DO with our frustration.

this shit is bad. this is the textbook example of the queer community turning against itself instead against the actual cishet oppressors. while yes cishets are chided lightly in these reblog chains for being bad (what else is new?) the vast majority of the words and analysis in this thread go towards shitting on other queer people, either drag queens directly or cisgender queer people who don't differentiate enough between transfems and drag queens or whatever. however you slice it, this is the definition of infighting. that is what is happening on this post.

i think i've mostly made my point but i'll finish with the very last lines of the last response which is the closest to reasonable:

"And I guess it just frustrates me that the people who use the idea of "queer history" as a bludgeon to tell trans women to be quiet don't know what they're talking about."

Like... telling trans women to be quiet? the snarky post saying for trans women to educate themselves on the history of drag is not silencing trans women. it is literally inviting trans women to stay in this discussion and potentially find value in this artform. that is not just shutting trans women down entirely. in fact, it kinda feels like that is what is happening to the cis queer people and cishets who like drag.

i dont' have any pulitzer prize winning arguments to make the trans women who inevitably will disagree with me see what im so concerned about. i don't know what string of words to use to get people to understand why i find this so threatening to the future of the queer community's existence. we NEED to disagree with each other respectfully. we NEED to have constructive dialogues. but what i see in this post specifically is evidence of trans women being radicalized against the rest of the queer community in real time. and why? because of resentment. supposedly drag queens are making a mockery of transfeminitity by making drag into this big public display that's watering down the queer essence into something palatable for the straights. idk. maybe that's true.

but again. what is the response? what do we DO with this information? well apparently spend a lot of time shitting on drag queens ig. the saddest thing of all is that in a lot of ways i agree with the idea that being expected to just adore drag in an uncritical uncomplicated manner because you are a queer is very annoying at best and deeply hurtful and insulting at worst. i basically have no reason to like modern drag in and of itself save for its association with the queer liberation movement and that history. i have positive feelings of drag not because of any of the times i went to a drag show and enjoyed it (a grand total of zero times) but because of the importance in my heart to support any kind of intentional gender bending in society. whether that's gender bending like they do in the new york balls in paris is burning, gender bending by being born one gender and transitioning to the other later, or gender bending by being a man indiscernible from any other cisgender average joe but still preferring to want to be with another man, i NEED to support all of it because all of this makes me safer as a queer person. sadly, it seems the separatist movements have already taken root. it seems as though individual factions of the queer community are dividing against each other in a time when gay rights have become mainstream but QUEER rights on the whole are more threatened than ever, basically the perfect breeding grounds for resentment and infighting to get out of control.

i want to emphasize the need for queer solidarity. the need to accept people even if their queerness feels like its brushing up against yours. and then i want to ask every queer person on here alongside every straight ally to ponder deeply what the POINT of this rhetoric is.

no i mean it. do it. ask yourself what the point is in being this militant against drag queens? or ace people? or intersex people? or any other hypothetical group that isn't your neck of the queer woods? why is this group of queer people gaining rights a bad thing for you? why? can you say why? and if you can, is that a valid enough reason to go to war with the rest of the queer community?

i don't care if you agree with me.

i just want you to be brave enough to ask the question without any expectations and just listen. listen to yourself, to your internal biases, to other queer people, to straight people who support you, to people who don't, it does not matter in the end. i just ask you to pose the question:

what. is. the. point. of it all?

I've gotta admit I think about this one a lot for many reasons. I'd really love to see what others think

[thoughtsbeewild]

Shout out to All American Patriots out there who make "Unity" Happen. Senile Biden didn't do it, the STUPID who collided with Obama, took your money for concerts and entertainment

That video that one girl did with Jason Aldean song "go woke go broke" damn i never realized how many Americans patriots felt that way, after seeing so many SHORTS made out of that song, shorts in all kinds of forms which lets you know SILENT MAJORITY OF FOLKS ARE LISTENING, ITS AMAZING! We all don't want to see America fall. Biden, the demoncrats, MAINSTREAM MEDIA , CELEBRITIES LIKE TAY TAY SWIFT(PEOPLE DONT REMEMBER HER HOSTILE TWITTER QUOTE ABOUT ORANGE MAN HOW HE SHOULD GO TO HELL ROTT, NOBODY VOTE FOR HIM) DO YOU GUYS REMEMBER TWITTER HATRED QUOTE TAYLOR SWIFT DID DURING CAMPAIGN ELECTION IN 2020?

Revisit Recap : 2020 campaign election

NO BECAUSE ALL THAT HAS BEEN WIPED OUT, YET HERE WE ARE IN 2023 SHE BECAME MOST POPULAR BITCH ON SOCIAL MEDIA GAINING SO MANY FOLLOWERS AND PEOPLE ATTENDING HER CONCERTS. Some people I work with are HARD CORE TAYLOR SWIFT FANS. Its like Mainstream Media which is controlled by the GOVT will focus on shit that you shouldnt know. Same with all the Fucking Homicide, the killings in each state..But yet here we are, thier HATRED FOR TRUMP STILL RISES BECAUSE NOW THAT BIDEN IN POWER PRESIDENT HE CAN GET ALL CONTROL AND USE EVERYTHING AGAINST ORANGE MAN TO GET HIM LOCKED UP. BIDEN CAN TWIST EVERY WORD , ALLEGATIONS AND MAINSTREAM MEDIA CNN, YAHOO, TMZ, NBC, FOX NEWS, ALL THOSE FUCKERS STIR UP THE PUBLIC.

LIKE THAT STUPID PUBLICITY FOR CALIFORNIA SO CALLED HURRICAN HILLARY, FROM THE RESIDENTS OF CALIFORNIA IN THAT STATE I SPOKEN TO , ALL IS FINE NOTHING HAPPEN. LIKE ANY OTHER RAIN OR WHATEVER. THE MEDIA THE DEMONCRAT GOVERNOR NEWSOM WENT ABOVE AND BEYOND TO MAKE IT SOUND LIKE CALIFORNIA WAS OVER. NO I THINK TEXAS, FLORIDA, NEW YORK, ATLANTA, INDIANAPOLIS, MINNESOTA AND OTHER STATES HAVE IT MORE BAD.

So whats my point, my point is that communites are helping eachother from destroying eachother. Yet people bow down to the government and taylor swift and the fucking celebrities as if they were responsible for helping US PUNY AMERICAN PATRIOTS out. The little people.. The fact that that video i shared, man alot people are making that viral in thier own silent way. I think thats awesome, im silent here because ya'll know whats up and how shit works and how many corrputed people will try to use DIRT to destroy your life, the life you build..

I did not watch the 2023 presidential debate. WHY? BECAUSE I LOST HOPE IN OUR PRESIDENTAL ELECTION AFTER SENILE BIDEN GOT ELECTED BY THE DOMINION MACHINE, HELP OF BAD APPLES IN ALL STATES TO DROP MORE MAIL IN VOTES, A PRESIDENT SAT IN HIS BASEMENT ENTIRE CAMPAIN IN 2020 ELECTION DID NOT DESERVE TO BE THIS PRESIDENT. THE ONE who is creating war, death amongst the United states. The fact that thier alot of people killing eachother all over the united states in small poor communities are at the highest risk, murders

Nobody REMEMBERS VALDERADE SHOOTINGS WHAT WAS IT 19 KIDS, 2 ADULTS, ASIAN HATE CRIME AND NAIL SALOON 4 SHOOTERS, MORE KILLINGS EVERYWHERE, THIS IS UNDER UNITED STATES PRESIDENT BIDEN THAT PEOPLE ARE SO HAPPY ABOUT. YET PEOPLE ARE PRAISING TAYLOR SWIFT? LIKE WHY? DID SHE HELP WITH ANYTHING BUT MORE MONEY INCOME FOR HERSELF?

Whats worst an unsolictied virus known as covid 19? that originated from a bat cave. Then people and media pointed to orange man. Member CNN making every show a ticking time bomb of deaths every day.

The media never points anything bad about Senile Biden , it puppets and its FAMOUS CELEBRITIES THAT.

CNN , the CELEBRITIES, TMZ. YAHOO, MSBC, THE HILL they dont do the TICKING TIME BOMB HOW MANY MURDERS, DEATH HAPPEN UNDER HIS PRESIDENCY. WHY THEY DONT DO THAT, THATS NOT FAIR. LIKE THE UNFAIR ELECTION.

That's how new LEADERSHIP is at my old COMPANY. YOU DARE QUESTION, CHALLENGE THIS EVIL DIRECTOR, SUPERVISOR, YOU ARE DONE, WHICH MEANS WHAT THEY DO THE ORANGE MAN, WHAT I HAD EXPERIENCED. IT HAS BEEN CRAZY WAY TO HEAL and not go to the liberal/demoncratic behavior.