#like. why am i doing this even. what the fuck. i think i'm going to ask her if i can cancel.
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inkskinned · 22 hours ago
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you said you were stuck in a time loop, which was fine. i feel like late-stage capitalism has us all in a time loop, ammiright? you came barging in at 5:33. in the morning. i hadn't even processed the idea of coffee.
but you had this look of utter panic in your eyes. terror like the ocean. you grabbed my cheeks. im in a time loop.
i don't know why in movies the first reaction is to deny it. when someone is panicking like that, it's not appropriate to ask them to calm down. it didn't matter if i believed it, what mattered was that you believed it so much that it was consuming you.
so here we are. i pour you some of the dark roast. "you look like utter and entire hell," i say.
you push your fingers into your eyes. "you always say that."
i try to think of something funny to say that i wouldn't have said on previous time loops, but jokes don't land without the proper timing (lol). "remind me to think -"
"-yeah, of a joke that only works in the future. and before you say anything, i know you're pissed i just stole your punchline." you bolt the coffee, which is wild. it's very hot. you don't seem to notice.
i blow on mine to cool it down. i both am very pissed at you and also i can't see you in this amount of panic without wanting to help. but i'm also not really sure what we are, not since i saw you kiss her like that, no offense. it just was like, kind of rude when you knew i liked you.
and besides. i'm just like, barely a person. i write omegaverse fanfiction. i love the concept of a time loop, but what the fuck am i gonna do? send an alpha in there? i open my mouth.
you point at me. "you're about to ask why me. and then say some disparaging shit about yourself. i'm just a nerd who plays dnd or something. that self-own is slightly different each time." you sigh. "i know you think you can't really help me. i don't know who can help me. i only came to you because you fucking believe me." you check your watch, sigh, and throw your head back. you cover your eyes with one hand. "i've come here on 26 separate revolutions," you say. "you have believed me every time. and yeah, i have no idea how you fit into this but i just -" you sigh again. "i just like fucking talking to someone about it."
"do you need more cof-" i start, but you're already holding the empty cup out. i frown at it. "you're not getting any more until you promise not to bolt this one like an animal."
you laugh a little and sit up, pushing your hair out of your face. "okay, that's new dialogue. but to be fair to you, i'm not usually this rude. i'm still pretty new at all of this." you check your watch again. another sigh. i guess you're cruising for a personal best in the Sigh Olympics.
i almost tell you im not an NPC but i've played enough video games to know i'm very much an NPC. i pour you another cup. "so what happens in the loop?"
"really bad explosion." you mutter into the mug. you put your elbows on the table (rude) and bury your face in your arms like an angsty teenager. one hand floats up while you talk, because evidently you literally can't talk without your hands. "i have to save the day and there's this bomb and i have no bomb training and it keeps moving, you know."
"do i die?"
you peek up from your arms. "yeah. bigtime. you keep trying to run or stay or do anything and you always super die."
"oh."
"to be fair, like, everyone dies in it though.... so you're in good company."
i hate that you make me laugh. i hate that being around you always feels tingly and strange, this electric tension between us. something that is evidently (given how you stuck your tongue down a stranger's throat literally 3 days ago) (well. 3 for me) super one-sided. i take a sip of my coffee and close my eyes.
i die today, i guess. a little spark of panic starts at the top of my hands and starts whipping up my wrists.
"shit," you say. you look at your watch and jump to your feet. "i have to go. if i can come back, i will. i am still trying to figure out when is best to do everything, you know? the order of stuff. maybe morning isn't good for us."
i look up at you and think about how you keep kissing me in the back of my car and in alleyways and in the dark. and i can never fucking get a read on you. and i also think about how incredibly panicked you look. how broken. how long have you been doing this? "i don't want to die," i say.
you glance downwards. "well, you're not really dead, you'll come back in the loop."
"but i will have died." my hands are shaking. i am trying really hard to stay calm.
you push your hands through your hair again. "i really have to go. i will have this discussion with the next version of you, though. it is like, something i am thinking about."
"but i don't get a next version," i say. i don't really have the language for this, because i haven't had 26 tries with you. i only have my memories: you, a week ago. drunk and telling me you loved me in my ear. you, kissing her anyway. you, months ago, throwing up on my birthday, whispering to me i ruin everything i touch, always, over and over. please don't ask. i can't ever fucking have that be you.
i run my finger along the rim of the mug. "i don't want to die in this one."
you seem baffled by this. "i get that but - time will reset, you'll be fine, you won't even remember we talked about this."
"but i know now." i stand up too. "i have to live the rest of this day knowing i could die. knowing i probably am going to."
"you could always die, to be fair."
i feel my hands get out of control. "earlier, you said i always say a different insult about myself. what if you're just going through different parallel universes and those are all just different - but real - versions of myself? what if you're not in a time loop, you're in a fucking universe loop?"
"if it helps, i've wondered this too. also, you're hot in all of them. if that helps."
i point at you. "no flirting. i'm trying to figure out if i die today."
"who's flirting?" you catch my wild hands and give me that long, perfect smile. like we're in this together. "i won't let ya die." you check your watch and sigh again. "well. maybe not this time."
i grit my teeth. you are so not making quips at me while i try to explain the existential dread i'm having. "does the time loop reset if i fucking kill you?"
"honestly i don't know how long it continues after i die, because i just wake up. it could be that the loop goes until the explosion for everyone, and we're all in the loop, or it could be that when i die, the loop restarts. when i die i wake up, is all."
i pull away from you and stalk into the kitchen and start doing all 3 of my dishes. "okay, first, you know i was joking. and secondly, this is exactly my point. you don't know if this is just a parallel universe. maybe in the ones where you died, the explosion happened and nobody reset and it's just you travelling." i have to stop and push my heel into my eyeball. "... how often have you died?"
i look at you. you look at me. you give me this very sad, halfway smile and a little what can ya do shrug. something in that action seems so old and weary that i want to burst into tears.
"i have to go," you say. "really. for real. there's this family of five i save from getting into a car crash. and i know it's like oh but we're all gonna die in the explosion anyway, what's the point. and..." you shrug again. "it matters to me, is all. at least i saved them for now. at least i saved anything."
you pad over to me and wrap me in a tight hug. you always seem so tall against me. i feel your cheek rest against the top of my head for a moment. for a second, it's just us, and the space is warm, and my heart is a little broken hare.
you leave me there, and i stand in my stupid badly lit kitchen with my stupid mugs. i think about you. i start texting my mom that she needs to get out of the city, but it feels pointless.
i don't know what to do. tomorrow is the same day for you. but i have to prepare to die in my today.
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lovelytayforce · 8 hours ago
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I agree with this comment here so hard, I remember getting blasted for calling readers who don't comment "leeches" on R/Fanfiction and I'm glad people are seeing that for what it is even if it's four years late
So, I'm gonna share my own little story here because discord has actively ruined communities for fanfic (and art too I'm not gonna leave y'all out cause my bestie @zoetiger-1106 is an artist who deserves way more praise than she gets!!) The reason why authors and myself see the "I'm shy" shit as an excuse is because the same people will type long ass tirades on Discord without a single thought. YOU CAN EDIT AO3 COMMENTS PEOPLE! If you make a mistake, read it back over and edit it. I've watched it happen in real-time with one of my favorite commenters on my one-shot where they left a short gushing comment and then came back and wrote more, you have no excuse much less reason to go "Man fandom keeps telling me to not critique and I might make a mistake so I will say nothing and consume like the average TV and Streaming consumer who thinks there doing something!" YOU have a lot of power with comments and even those bookmark tags hell just copy-paste what you put into those bookmark tags as a comment I DON'T CARE AT THIS POINT USE THAT LIL BOX TO VOICE SOMETHING!!!! God this is all over the place idc but I read back at those bookmarks, and saw people call my works the best and super cool and I APPRECIATE THAT but tell me! Stop taking the easy route, I been blasted for misunderstandings over comments multiple times cause people take my "tone" terribly cause it sucks being black and emotive online yay and for some reason people think !!!! Is bad? yes, I've been hit with that but I keep on trucking cause fuck whatever some weirdo thinks about exclamation points! Anyways back to discord and why I hate it now, I was in a small fandom, KFP got invited to a discord cause ONE person commented on my works and saw they talked about my fic, and at first, I was happy and people TALKED about my chapters at length in the fanfic channel. I basically was the ONLY ONE posting consistently in that channel and it was great but also I wanted that on my fic to show I improved so guess what I did? I went all in trying to one-up myself to be noticed, to have the acclaim my peers did so it would evolve outside of discord channels but it never happened. And Imma tell y'all now; it never will. Readers prefer convenience over your hard work, they are not gonna take time for you no matter how much you improve. People told me over and over while I looked for solutions for this; "We can't make commenting look like an obligation." "Add more prose, space these paragraphs better" all this just for no one to take the initiative and say something SINCERE towards a work they love on it. I've had to tell my own ex-friends now to go leave comments on works they called Masterpieces while ignoring me. Despite the fact they wanted Gen content in which I WROTE. Or met people who have very weird "I don't review" rules for themselves despite getting motivated by reviews themselves!! We're in a shitty time for creatives much less community cause we don't see each other as humans much less want to treat each others as we desire to be treated. Fanfic readers want to treat authors like showrunners and I hate it. But then your peers will tell you 'not to worry about engagement" and no I am because why is my hit count going up every day but ain't no one saying shit? Make it make sense!! I sat in that community commenting as much as I could, especially on long fics; it wasn't all perfect but I TRIED. I didn't expect shit back but hey it would have been nice but it never happened and again I learned; it never would. That's the real issue, no one wants to give no more; just take and take and take til you're sucked dry of passion worse than any corpo out right now. It's why I thankfully switched fandoms. I got ONE consistent commenter and they are better than that ENTIRE SMALL CLOSED COMMUNITY!! So, to any discord reactor for fanfic you better skip on to that message you made and copy and paste it in this box right here and never utter "I'm shy" ever again cause we see you, our friends tell us about you. You are not as anonymous as you think! 🫵🏽
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A writer friend told me something that broke my heart a little bit today; they're going to quit publishing their fanfic.
My instant thought was that they had been trolled or attacked or that something terrible had happened in their life because this person is so passionate about their writing. It wasn't any of that. Engagement with their works has been going down, as it has for many of us. Comments are like gold dust a lot of the time, and just looking through the historical comment counts on old fics on ao3 demonstrates this trend very clearly. It was not simply the comments dropping off which caused them to decide to stop posting, however.
My friend came across a discord server for their fandom (I should point out here that their fandom interest and mine diverged a couple of years ago, we stay in touch but don't currently read each other's posts because I'm not into their fandom and they would rather gouge their eyes out with a wooden spoon than read anything Star Wars) and specifically to share fic in that fandom. They joined, because we all love a good fic rec, only to discover that their latest multichapter fic, which has almost no comments and very few kudos, is being hotly discussed in this server as one of the best stories ever. Not one of these people has bothered to say this to them on the fic. When they asked, none of participants could see the point in telling the author of the fic they apparently loved so much that they love it.
This discovery has absolutely destroyed my friend's love of sharing fic. They share because they love seeing other people's enjoyment, and fic writers do that through comments and kudos/reblogs/likes because we don't get paid. There is no literary critic writing a blog post/article about how amazing the story is for us to copy and keep/frame. There is no money from royalties. All we have are the words of the people reading our works.
Those people on that server could have taken five minutes of the time they spent gushing about how amazing my friend's story was to other people and used it to tell the one person guaranteed to want to hear that praise how much they loved it. They could have taken a moment to express their opinion to the person who spent hours upon hours plotting, writing, editing, and posting those chapters. Instead, they deprived my friend of thing that keeps them sharing their writing, and in the process have killed their love of it. My friend now feels used and unmotivated.
I won't be sharing a link to their fic, they said I could share their experience but not their identity. I know they plan to post one final chapter. I know they intend to express their hurt at being excluded from the praise for the thing they created, and I know they intend to announce that as a consequence they will not be posting for a long while, if at all.
So please, I beg you, don't hide your love of a story from the writer. It's just about the only thing we have.
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tpwrtrmnky · 10 hours ago
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invaders
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[ID: Thirteen panel comic with crudely drawn stick people divided across four images.
Panel 1: A blue person with pointy ears on top of their square head watches two grayscale stick people argue.
Grayscale 1: "Hah, you fool! Nobody actually thinks they're blue, we're just being polite because they look blue enough!"
Grayscale 2: "You admit it openly! You admit the lies of chroma ideology, greenie!"
Grayscale 1: "Owned again! I am not green!"
Panel 2: A reddish-orange person talks to another grayscale person while Blue watches dejectedly.
Reddish-orange: "I mean back in my day we were content with just getting to be primary colors, but now that they're also asking for us to be treated like fully worthwhile people rather than freaks? I think the chromatic movement's gone too far."
Grayscale: "Wow! A reasonable one!"
R.O.: "Yeah I'm one of the good ones. Will you respect me for it?"
Grayscale: "Haha no, but I'll exploit you as long as you're useful to me!"
Panel 3: A grayscale person approaches blue from behind.
Grayscale: "Hey why do you have to go all the way to being an entire blue dog person? Can't you just be a normal person who pees outside?"
Blue, in narration: "And so, on that day, I finally accepted that it was time to leave."
Panel 4: The blue dogperson is now in a more deliberately rendered room with beige walls, kneeling and wearing sunglasses. An orange dogperson is laying on the floor next to them.
Blue: "I… We only wanted to be left alone. But even this place isn't safe from them anymore."
Orange: "Why is it so bad to have to deal with people who disagree with us?"
Panel 5: Blue looks dejectedly, with dramatic shadows across their face.
Blue: "This is why you've yet to earn our trust, Orangepup Dogsaturated. You fail to distinguish between legitimate debate and thinly veiled harassment."
Panel 6: The Most Illiterate Person Alive, a grayscale stick person riddled with still-bleeding bullet wounds, looms ominously at the outskirts of a nearby forest.
Blue, narrating: "As for that thing… Far from a person with legitimate views to debate, I have doubts regarding whether it is even a person."
Illiterate: "I am… the most… ill…itt…er…ate….. person…. alive….."
Panel 7: The most illiterate person alive leans down, breathing heavily. The dialogue is just "h" over and over.
Panel 8: Indoors, a hot pink person with fluffy fur is talking into a walkie-talkie, and an onyx-colored person is aiming a sniper rifle out the window.
Hot Pink: "Comrades! There's movement again! They're up to something!"
Panel 9: The most illiterate person alive leans back, screaming: "Holy fucking shitfuck"
Panel 10: A dramatic zoom out shows more of the forest as the most illiterate person alive screams: "I can't fucking believe these dogpeople want to make everywhere a public bathroom!"
Panel 11: A view of the dog people's barn from within the dark depths of the woods, where grayscale people are lurking. The most illiterate person alive is continuing to scream: "They hate supply chains for lifesaving medicine! They want to force everyone to be green and worship Barxism!"
Panel 12: A view of the sky with a mountain in the distance. A large number of voices with increasing frequency and intensity say "Holy shit" over and over.
Panel 13: Out of the woods a swarm of grayscale people emerge, using a variety of creative approaches to movement, screaming:
"I have some concerns!" "Would you like to debate this issue?" "You need a healthy debate climate!" "You should hear out opposing viewpoints!" "Stop censoring me"
The comic ends at this and you are left questioning what the fuck that was.
End ID.]
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hexlenx · 3 days ago
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LIE DETECTOR — aaron taylor-johnson
In which both you and your husband were invited to do a lie detector test in the vanity fair channel.
note: I only own the story not the channel and our daddy Aaron. This was also inspired by Ariana Grande and Cynthia's lie detector episode so some of the questions in this story might be the same as the episode. I honestly don't like Sam Tayler that much because of her marrying a male so much younger than her but I can't lie that she's a decently good person, she matched Aaron's freak but a bit too much—
warnings!: none really.
__________________
"Hello I am Mr. Johnson, married to this lovely amazing woman here." Aaron Johnson greeted towards the large camera in front of him and his wife, who was beside him blushing as well as smiling widely at what he said, before moving his gaze towards you. Everyone in the room as well as the viewers could see the love in his eyes with the way he looks at you.
"And I am [ Your Name ] Johnson, the wife of this very handsome and devilishly charming bloke beside me." You grinned at the camera while moving your hand towards your husband's hand before holding on to it. This lead to Aaron subconsciously intertwining both of your hands before mindlessly holding it up for him to kiss your joined hands.
It was an adorable sight for everyone watching as they could feel the pure love coming from them.
"Mr. and Mrs. Johnson, you are here to take a lie detector test. One will be attached to a machine for the test to work and the other will be sitting in the chair in front of you to ask you some questions. So who will be ready to take the hot seat?" The woman behind the camera said to the couple. After hearing this, you raised your free hand taking you and your husband by surprise.
"I think I can go first." You said while you looked at your husband, seeing if he agrees.
"You sure? I can go first for you." Aaron proposed but you shook your head and said you were okay to go first.
Now seated in your places, the woman, Stephanie, who was a lie detector professional put a black strap around your chest as well as a smaller one around your index finger.
"You alright, love?" Aaron asked his lover while smiling slightly when he saw you closing your eyes when the straps were put on you. He could tell you were about to enjoy this test and he could tell he would as well.
"Yes! Does this detect my anxiety as well?" You asked towards Stephanie who paused for a while.
"Yes, it can."
"Oh fuck me." You cursed making your husband laugh at your misery.
"Oh yea, laugh at my misery, why don't you?" This made Aaron laugh even harder before composing himself.
"Right. So before we start with the serious question, I need you to answer some simple questions to calibrate the machine. You okay with that, love?" Aaron inquired.
"Oh, Absolutely." You agreed. Aaron nodded and cleared his throat before asking you the questions.
"Alright, are you [ Your Name ] [Last Name ] Johnson?"
"Yes."
Stephanie nodded.
"Were you born in [ Birthday ]?"
"Yes."
Another nod from Stephanie.
"Are you nervous?"
"Yes but at the same time I feel really excited."
Another nod.
"Were you and Mr.Johnson married in [ date ] and at [ time ]?"
"That's oddly very specific but yes." Aaron chuckled at this because he agrees.
"The machine has been calibrated." Stephanie informed the couple to which they nodded. You adjusted in your seat before breathing out to ready yourself for the real questions.
"You ready, hon?" Aaron looked at his wife who nodded with a small 'yep'.
"Love, you've won two oscars and was awarded of the best young actress award in 2013. Would you say that you have the best work ethic?" This made you think a bit because you definitely don't have the best one right now but it was alright and you were comfortable.
"I wouldn't say I have the best, I mean there are some times where it's the worst and there are also times where it worked in the most conventional way. I would just say I'm a workaholic." You explained it as best as you could making Stephanie nod a yes from behind the lie detector. This caused you to beam in excitement, you knew to yourself that you weren't lying and seeing that it was confirmed made you excited.
Seeing you excited made Aaron smile at you fondly. He always loved seeing you light up, it's one of the things that made his days brighter even on his worst days. He guesses that this lie detector test would help both of you gain more trust in each other in some way.
"Oh you are definitely a workaholic. Speaking of, the next question is are you a workaholic?" Aaron chuckled out when he saw you sarcastically roll your eyes.
"Duh? I just did a few moments ago."
"Truthful." Stephanie said making you smile at her.
"Next is, would you work with this person?" Aaron slid a photo of Ben Barnes to which you chuckled.
"Oh my god, not Benjamin!" You dramatically exclaimed as you saw the photo of your long time friend, to which everyone chuckled in amusement. "We've worked together multiple times, secretly. Though Aaron knows this because he's 'his brother from another mother' if you get what that reference means." You winked at the camera.
"Hey! We're supposed to keep Padfoot a secret, what would his banshee of a mother think of now?" Aaron playfully reprimanded you to which you laughed because you understood his joke quite well.
"James, you practically announced that he was living with you since we were teens." You deadpanned continuing the joke as your husband playfully glared at you.
"Everything she said is the truth." Stephanie said, making everyone watching gape as you both basically revealed the Sirius Black and James Potter fancasts are best friends to the point of barging in each other's homes like the Harry Potter characters.
Both you and your husband exchanged amused glances before continuing on with the questions.
"What do you think of this photo?" Aaron slid another photo of you and Sam Taylor smiling at the camera on the way to the Tony Awards.
"Aw, it's Sammy! This was probably one of my favorite photos because if it weren't for Sam, me and Aaron wouldn't be together to this day. Because fun fact, Sam was the one who kept trying to put us together whenever she could when we met each other in the film Kick-Ass. It also just happened that I was the love interest of Dave Lizewski so it kind of made her set on her 'matchmaking' as she calls it. She's like a mother to me, truly." You explained in fondness, it was true. The woman was not that very liked due to her marrying a way more younger man than her but behind all that, she was truly only a woman who loved to love. Her movies directed by her showed that.
Sam saw what you and Aaron had and wanted you to be able to experience the type of love she couldn't have when she was younger. A love that was shared with a pair at the same age or close to their age. Sam loved her husband who was 34 now but even she knew that it wouldn't last, she was 57 for god's sake. She knew she would end up divorced sooner or later and she wanted to see you end up with someone you love and is the same age, she didn't want you to end up like her. Because she truly thought of you as her daughter as well.
Aaron stared at you with the warmest and loving eyes you could ever see in a person. He was deeply in love with you and the viewers can see it, feel it. He knew that you loved talking about Sam, she became like a mother figure to him too. She was the one who he confided to whenever he was worried about making the wrong move towards you and he never once regretted asking her for help because he wouldn't be married to you if he did.
"Alright, love. Next question is—" Aaron scoffed off a laugh threatening to burst out of his mouth when he read the question.
"What? What is it?" You asked worriedly to your husband who shook his head no before stuttering out the question.
"Do you believe the moon landing was fake?"
"What the fuck? What kind of question is that? No!" You voiced out in confusion. Of course you knew it was real! Right?
"Inconclusive." Stephanie hid a smile as she said this, the machine was indeed saying it was inconclusive.
Aaron bursted out of laughing as soon as he heard that.
"You think it was fake?" Your husband laughed out while smacking his thigh from amusement.
"No! I didn't until Stephanie put that in me!" You exclaimed as you looked absolutely repulsed and confused. Maybe this is rigged.
"Oh god, that is hilarious! I am never letting this go down, love." Aaron breathed out as he tried to compose himself. You on the other hand, covered your face with your hands in disbelief.
"Do you believe the earth is flat?"
"No!"
"Deceptive."
Another burst of laughter as well as a gasp of disbelief.
"You think the Earth's flat now?" Aaron was almost crying because of how entertaining this was. This was the best day of his life, one of them at least. "Let's try again, Do you think the Earth is flat?"
"No, the earth is round." You said, now much more calmer than before. This made Stephanie nod in confirmation that you were indeed telling the truth.
"I think you were still stuck with the moon landing, love."
"I was definitely still stuck there."
"Alright there is one more question before we switch." Aaron announced after a series of questions went by. You nodded and slightly adjusted in your seat.
"Do you love me?"
"Of course, I do, very much." You answered instantly and with a single nod from Stephanie, Aaron smiled softly at you to which you did the same.
"Why?" Aaron added making you pretend to think, which made him chuckle a bit.
"The right question for that is 'cuz, why not?" You said with a smile as your husband only raised a brow signalling you to elaborate.
"What's there not to love about you or yourself in general?" You said softly as you looked into his eyes with that same look that he has on his. Both of you stared at each other in silence. God, He thinks he just fell in love with you again. He thought as he took in your whole being in front of him.
"I don't know—a lot, I guess?" He shrugged seemingly nonchalant but you knew better.
"Well I love them and love all of you." You said short and honestly. To which Stephanie nodded once again to confirm that what you said was true. The Lie detector professional knew she doesn't need to speak to confirm this so she settled with a simple nod like from before because she did not want to ruin this cute moment the soulmates were having. Yes, she thinks both of you are soulmates. Not everyone would look at their spouse like that even after getting married or spending time with each other.
"God fuckin' damn it, I think I just fell in love with you over and over again."
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sweetbunpura · 3 days ago
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Filled with Static...
Summary: Yuu was already fed up before coming to Playful Land and now that it's over... She has some very choice words for she has reached her boiling point...
Sorry in advance~
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Yuu watches with hollow eyes as Fellow and Gidel depart without having to face the consequences of their actions. Everyone jokes around her about what they just went through, but static is rapidly and quickly filling Yuu's ears. She moves away from the group and makes her way down a street, unaware of the sound of footsteps behind her. A hand lands on her shoulder and she's quick to slap it off.
"Ow, rude much?"
Yuu turns to see Ace with his arms crossed. "What?"
"Just wanted to know why you took off like that."
"Why do you care?"
"Wow, jeez." Ace scoffed. "I knew you were snippy from the start, but I thought that would've cleared up. What's the big deal?"
"What's the big deal? What's the big deal!?" Her voice echoes throughout the small area of the docks. "Ace, are you fucking blind as well as a total fucking moron!?" She jabs her hand to where Playful Land used to be. "We almost got turned into puppets and sold off because of you guys!"
"Hey, we got out in the end!"
"No, we didn't. If Fellow hadn't gotten that phone call, we'd be goners." The others have stopped a few feet away, but Yuu ignores them. "And you're cracking jokes about it."
"Well, destroying the park was-"
"I mean about the whole thing, you brainless baboon." She snarls. "From the start, you ignored all the fucking warning signs that said you should stay far away from this man. Did Azul tricking you not ring any bells in that empty head of you?" She tapped her finger against Ace's forehead. "And even when you were told that the warning signs were blaring red, you still ignored them."
"Hold on." Ace growled. "Why am I getting signaled out?"
"Oh it's not just you, Ace." She points behind him. "It goes double for those cacophony of idiots."
"Wow, rude, Yuu-chan..." Cater mutters.
"I get that you guys are like this. It's all fun and games to the ones who can use magic." She shakes her hand in a mocking way. "But this is just another scar on my body that I do not need." She pulls up her sleeves to show the overblot scars...as well as a new wooden looking scar on her wrist. "You guys think this is a joke, when it's not. You're risking my life with your guys shit."
"You came with us!" Ace argues.
"Cause I had to make sure my useless excuse for a fucking cat didn't keel over and die!" Yuu shouts and begins shoving Ace. "You. Treat. Me. Like. I'm. Expendable." She pushes him back. "I'm a living being too, jack ass, what I have done to warrant being treated lower than dirt? Every time this happens, and I almost lose my life in the process... how many more times is this going to be an almost before it actually happens?"
The red head narrows his eyes and snorts. "If you hate it here so much, why don't you just go back home?"
"Ace..." Lilia tries to say but is cut off by Yuu socking Ace in the face and sending him to the ground.
"NEWS FLASH, ASSHOLE!" The look in Yuu's eyes are murderous. "I'VE BEEN TRYING TOO! YOU GUYS CAN JUST CALL UP YOUR FAMILY OR SEND THEM A QUICK TEXT TO CHECK UP ON THEIR WELL BEING! YOU'RE A PORTAL AWAY FROM HOME! I HAVE NOTHING, I GOT NOTHING, I HAVE NO FAMILY HERE AND I AM REMINDED OF IT EVERY DAY BY YOU GUYS AND BY CROWLEY!" Tears well up in her eyes. "I've had it here. I'm gone. I'm leaving NRC, I'm getting far away from you guys." She turns to leave and rubs her eyes. "Enjoy the rest of your fucking lives."
"Yuu-chan!"
"Shrimpy!"
"Herbivore, come back!"
"Potato!"
"Henchhuman!" Grim tries to follow after her only to lower his ears and back up as she shoots the darkest glare she can muster at him. "I'm....I'm..."
Yuu disappears into the morning crowd that had gathered to learn what the commotion was about. She did not return to NRC that day...rather Crewel had found her, curled up outside his temporary house.
"Oh, Pup...." He pulls his coat off, wraps it around the crying young lady, and helps her inside.
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biancadoes1 · 17 hours ago
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Am I missing something?
Every time I open X people are saying to “be prepared for a 💣” when it comes to N & L.
Possibly out of the loop but is there any context?
HERE'S SOME TOUGH FUCKING LOVE ON A FRIDAY AFTERNOON.
It's a tarot thing yet again.
They're convinced we're going to get another bomb. They also keep pushing the date back on said bomb.
Truthfully it just feels like we're waiting for something that might not ever come. It's making people feel anxious.
Here's the thing - paying attention to any of this drama surrounding irrelevant people is only going to prolong the bullshit. I'm really beginning to think some of you enjoy the chaos bombs more than you enjoy anything Nicola or Luke do, say, or crumb for us in the fandom.
I'm going to say it AGAIN, and this is not directed solely at you anon but everyone.
STOP. GIVING. ATTENTION.
I need everyone to fully understand what I'm saying.
These people THRIVE off attention. That's why we're almost to the end of November and this fucking shit is still going on. The spiraling, the back and forth, etc.
Aren't y'all tired? Or you just like to be miserable? You do realize that they're fucking with people, right? Because the way some of you react is down right fucking childish and they probably sit there and laugh behind their burner accounts that I KNOW are on every social media site.
Please. Learn to control your emotions. Some of you are way too damn old to even be spiraling about anything let alone some unemployed 20 somethings spending precious minutes of their lives taking the piss out of a fandom.
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littlefireball · 2 days ago
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ᴊʜ|ᴡᴀɴᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴏ ʙᴀᴅ (ᴀ)(ᴍ)
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ᴘᴇʀᴠ!ᴊᴏɴɢʜᴏ x 9ᴛʜ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ꜰ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: ꜱᴍᴜᴛ|ᴜɴᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛᴇᴅ ꜱᴇx(ᴏᴏᴘꜱ)|ᴊᴏɴɢʜᴏ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴘᴀɴᴛɪᴇꜱ ᴛʜɪᴇꜰ|ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴏᴜᴛ|ꜰɪɴɢᴇʀɪɴɢ|ʀᴏᴜɢʜ ꜱᴇx(?)
ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 2.3ᴋ
Part 2 of perv!JH x 9th member
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One day, while you were tidying up your closet, you noticed that your underwear collection was getting pretty sparse. It struck you as odd since you hadn't tossed out that many. You figured maybe you had stashed some in a different closet and didn't think much of it. So, you picked up a few more pairs and moved all your underwear to another cabinet. 
When Jongho opened your drawer like he usually does, he couldn't find your underwear. Just then, he heard someone say something from behind.
"What are you looking at?Panties thief." 
Oh shit. He fucked up.
He jumped up nervously when he heard your voice. As he turned around slowly, he rubbed his hands together, only to find your angry gaze waiting for him. But instead of feeling nervous or guilty, he was turned on more. There you stood once more, clad in a towel that barely covered you. Your exposed thighs were visible, and your chest appeared even more alluring as you pushed it up by crossing your arms.
"What can you explain?Huh?" You yelled angrily. Jongho stammered, no words formed even if he opened his mouth. You stepped forward,  locking your gaze onto the man who gulped nervously, your enchanting fragrance enveloping him. Gosh. You smelled so good and he found himself drawn to breathe in your captivating aroma.
"Say something, asshole!" 
"Yah!Fuck!" He stepped in even nearer, his large frame casting a shadow over you. Towering above, his height made you instinctively flinch and look away. Then, with a soft touch, he bent down and cradled your chin in his hand. "Then who is always wearing only a towel?Don't tell me you forget your pajamas every time." 
"That's not the main point!Don't try to distract me!" You said that with a sheepish expression, which made him smile. He knew you so well. You're definitely the most reserved one in the group, and you keep your daily style pretty polished, avoiding anything too flashy. Only wearing a towel before your members? He couldn't believe you were not doing it on purpose. 
"You fucking stole me panties!You fucking pervert!!What're you doing with it?!" You pushed away his hand, totally pissed off. 
"You guess?" 
"WHAT THE FUCK!" You smacked at him, but he held your wrists tight to stop you. 
"Hit me harder or your towel will slip down." He spoke with a serene demeanor, his smile only fueling your frustration. You clenched your arms, feeling the towel slip further down. As the realization hit that you were on the verge of exposing yourself, heat rushed to your cheeks, leaving you utterly flustered.
"You fucking bastard, let me go." You tried to shake off his hands but he was too strong. 
"How can you say this to your oppa?" 
"You…shut up!" 
"But I don't want to." He grabbed your wrists, pulling you to his embrace. Leaning down to meet your gaze, his hot breath pooled against your skin. "Unless you want to be naked in front of me." 
"You…you totally a pervert!" You looked away, pursing your lips. 
"Don't tell me you are not." 
"Why am I?" You shouted back.
"So tell me why you are wearing a towel?" 
"I…I…forget my clothes." You trailed off, feeling too shy. 
"Is it?" A playful smile danced across his face as he straightened up to gaze at the bathroom. In the mirror, he caught sight of your pajamas draped casually behind the door. "And what about that dress? Isn't that your sleepwear?"
"I-" 
"Forget to wear clothes when I'm here?" He sneered, pressing his chest against your fists. "Aren't you a pervert?" 
"I-I'm not…" 
"Are you going to continue to be tough, cutie?" 
"Then…then what 'bout you?!You…you stole my panties!" 
"I admit." 
"What?" You gasped in surprise, your eyes growing wide. He pulled you close, his arm encircling your waist, prompting you to rise onto your tiptoes and lean into him.
"Because I want you so bad, love." He stared at your rosy lips before shifting to your eyes. "Then what about you?"
You couldn't deny that you were intentionally drawing him in. Each time he took your hand or brushed against you, a swarm of butterflies danced in your stomach. You were fully aware of the way he gazed at you, like a hunter eyeing his target, yet you feigned ignorance. Whenever he entered your room, a part of you secretly wished for him to linger, prompting you to conjure up reasons for him to stay—suggesting movie marathons or gaming sessions, all while seeking those fleeting moments of closeness.
"Cat gets your tongue, honey?" The name he said gave you shivers, even stirring the depressed desire within you. 
"So can you tell me what would you do if I admit I'm doing all the things on purpose?" Your hand found its way to his nape, wrapping around it to pull him closer. 
"I will kiss you so hard and give my girl all the attention she needs." With a warm smile, he bent closer, his lips brushing against yours as you nodded in agreement. The initial kisses were a bit awkward, a reflection of your inexperience, but soon Jongho's confidence took over, igniting a fiery passion between you. 
Suddenly, a chill enveloped you as your towel slipped away, landing on the floor with a soft thud, causing you to gasp in shock. Seizing the moment, Jongho deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring as you instinctively recoiled in surprise. Yet, he gently but firmly cradled the back of your head, ensuring you remained lost in the intoxicating kisses. 
You both laughed softly as you broke away from the kisses, only to reconnect as he lifted you with ease. With a playful shove, he sent you onto the bed, the mattress releasing a soft puff as you landed. He shrugged off his coat and unzipped his pants, his eyes roaming over your naked figure. You were undeniably stunning, really.
"I don't have a condom." He tossed his clothes aside in a frenzy, unconcerned about the time it took to search for them.
"Me either." 
"Well, one kid doesn't kill. Damn it." Your lips met again as he cupped your face and loomed over you. That was much rougher than last time. He kissed you without care. Lips sucking and smacking were the only sound in the room, fueling your desires even more. His arched crotch pressed against your velvet clit, every friction made from his movement caused you to moan in his mouth. Your legs found their way to wrap up his waist, trying to get more friction as you rub harder. 
"Someone is horny, huh?" He spoke between the kisses, his face diving into your neck as he planted kisses on that. 
"Aren't you?" You replied with a soft voice, tilting your head to give him more access. He smirked at your response, licking your skin to find you trembling. 
"So sensitive." His voice flowed like warm honey, pulling you into the enchanting whirlpool that was him. You relished the way his breath caressed your skin, a soft melody that seemed to savor you like a delicacy. His hand reached down to press your clit, causing you to let out a soft whimper as his touches went further. His fingers glided over your body, a gentle friction on your sensitive spot that made you whimper with delight. He suddenly flattened his fingertip to give a hard press and circle on it and you couldn't help but moan loudly. Stretching your fold slowly, he inserted two fingers into your tightness in one go. 
"Jjong…!" 
"Shh…gotta prepare you well." 
He went as deep as possible until his finger reached your limit, pulling them out fully and shoving back to the depth. Your choppy moan was swallowed by his kiss, only a muffled sound flew from your lips. His pace quickened enough to ruin you, a loud water sound echoed the room as he plunged to your cunt without mercy. You moaned so loud and your face turned red as if oxygen got out of your lungs. 
Your toes curled as you were pushed to the edge, a knot forming in your stomach that urge to release. The wall wrapped around Jongho's fingers tightened and he knew you at the limit. "Cum for me, honey." "Mhm…" His words were just like a trigger, combined with his fingertip kissing your sweet spot suddenly, tugging you to the climax. Your whole body shook as the hot juices released from your lower core, soaking his hand. 
"Good,dear. Look at you." He said, his voice deep and attractive. Your fuzzy eyes met with him sucking his fingers deliciously and left a pop sound when he pulled out. 
"Ready for me?" A smirk crossed on his lips as he climbed on the bed, the mattress dipping down due to his weight. He grabbed his length to pat on your clit, entering your cunt after you nodded as a non-verbal agreement. Shutting your eyes tightly, you arched your back and wrapped your arms around his board shoulder. You leaned back as he hovered you, meeting your lips gently. He stayed still for a while to let you adjust his size. Even if he stretched you but that was not enough for his big fat cock. 
His hand once again reached down to caress your clit, giving you more excitement to make you relax. Once he found you not that intense, he slid deeper as if testing water. Everything was slow and gentle. You naturally got used to his size as his length kept rubbing along your curve deliciously. The way his hard tip kissed your sweet spot caused a wave of pleasure to rush through your body. 
You swore his pre-cum filled your cunt everywhere as it was so hot inside you. He became more impatient as he deepened the kisses. He pulled up your hands above your head, tucking them together so that he could grab them in one hand. Sitting up straight, he slammed his hips toward you as a long, deep moan left his rosy lips. "Damn it, you are so good. I gotta be rough with you." 
"Yes…yes…please." You gasped, tilting your head back to reveal your neck adorned with his marks. With each powerful thrust, a flicker of concern crossed your mind about the bed's stability. The creaking noise echoed around you, making you wonder if it would give way at any moment. Jongho was unfazed; he collided with your warmth, disregarding any potential fallout. Sure, dance practice might be off the table tomorrow since your backs were aching. But who cared? He brushed aside the thought with a carefree attitude as he pounded your cervix with a different angle. 
"Slow…slow down…jjong…" 
"Nope." Withdrawing his cock, he spun you around in an instant, your head hitting the pillow as he held you down, your backside elevated enticingly. With a firm grip on your wrists, he secured your arms behind you, pinning them down with an unyielding strength. One of his hands moved to your nape, grasping it tightly as he continued to roll his hips into you. You moaned so loud that your neighbor must complain tomorrow. But the roughness behind left you no choice. The messy moaning mixed with skin slapping sound, bouncing off the wall to make Jongho go rougher. 
"No…I can't take it…anymore." You huffed, but soon replaced by a high-pitched moan as he spanked you. 
"Just take it, honey." Smack, again. His hand sneaked under your body, reaching to your chest. Cupping it with his palm, he teased your nipple, rubbing it up and down. "So soft." You could only whine, feeling his cock ruin your sensitive, little body. "Hm…" His ball slammed your ass each time he thrashed back to your cunt at a steady pace. You couldn't help but squeeze hard around his cock with your wall, pulling him deeper to kiss the deepest part. 
This sensation made Jongho lost control. "Ah fuck!I'm cumming." A long throaty moan flew from his lips as the climax was approaching. It seemed that all the blood gathered on the tip, urging him to release. "Jongho…oppa…I'm so close." Your fist clenched around the sheet, making your fingertip turn white. "Show me what you get. Honey. Ah fuck!" His moaning was just like a beautiful melody rang in your ears, pushing you to get close to the limit. 
"Oh…oh…!" The harsh trusting lost its rhythm as Jongho became slow. He left his head each time he pushed deeply, staying for a while before another thrusting. A soft whimper left your body as all was overwhelming, the urge of releasing caused your heart to race.
"I can't take it anymore…" Tears gathered in your eyes, your bottom lips shaking as soon as his hard tip kept kissing your spot. 
"Cum…cum with me…Oh fuckkk…" He gasped and strained, releasing his warm essence against your wall, and in that moment, you both reached the peak of ecstasy together. The warmth filled you completely, spilling over onto the sheets. As he laid you down tenderly, he turned you over, only to find your tear-streaked face. He reached down to kiss you as if giving you a tender comfort. 
"You okay?" The words slipped from his lips with a soft pop as he gently tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. You nodded, pulling him closer by wrapping your arms around his shoulder. 
"What about tomorrow's practice?" 
"Uh…just tell them your back hurts because I fucked you too hard."
"Yah! Choi Jongho!" You playfully hit his chest, but he just grinned at you with that charming smile.
"I can see you're still full of energy. Want a round two?" He laughed, teasingly pushing against you once more.
"No way…" A soft moan escaped you as the sensations overwhelmed you. You quickly pressed your lips together, but he caught every bit of your reaction.
"So, you're not denying it?"
"Wait─" Before you could finish your thought, he captured your lips in another kiss and pulled you into a cozy embrace. 
Well, this night was turning out to be incredibly long.
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tag list: @angelsaway, @yeosangcutie0615, @monsta-x-jagi
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euniexenoblade · 3 days ago
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I debated if I wanted to mock this post/screenshot for a couple hours and i decided I was just gonna go in line by line and dissect it
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"being poly is a choice you make. not an identity you cannot change."
I disagree. I struggled with this through most of my teens and early twenties. The desire to be with multiple people was strong and the concept that I couldn't be with all of them was very confusing and hurtful not just to me, but the people I was with. Had I been taught what polyamory is younger and had known that monogamy is not actually the only way you're allowed to be, i'd have probably been able to stop struggling with this much sooner. Do I think this was as big of a mental struggle as being gay or trans? Nah. But it was certainly an issue that ate away at me.
As much as polyamory was a choice, so was me being trans was a choice. I would say both are inherent to who I am. Just because something isn't inherent to your identity, doesn't mean it isn't inherent to mine.
The second paragraph is a gross misinterpretation of what was said. I said abused poly people in relationships they cannot escape will likely cheat when they do find love. The same is true for monogamous people who cannot escape relationships. This happens all the fucking time. To women. To gay people. To trans people. To poly people. This is so utterly common it's an overused trope in story telling.
"OBVIOUSLY abusive situations aside"
The post was about abusive situations. You're already throwing away the core concept to the post.
"why are you staying with someone you are completely incompatible with"
This shows how this person has no value for relationships. Just because you realize you're poly doesn't mean your feelings for an individual disappears. You want to see if this relationship can still work, whether monogamous or polyamorous. Not to mention so many people would find themselves homeless or penniless by just leaving. There's no actual understanding of love and relationships and the heart here.
"you don't need to pursue any kind of relationship ever"
And gay people don't have to be in gay relationships. Trans people don't have to transition. Doesn't change the longing to experience what you want to experience.
"where exclusivity is agreed upon"
I know poly people who entered relationships under the premise the other person was poly, just for that person to decide "actually I'm monogamous, and I'll kill myself if you leave me." You have no understanding or empathy.
"wanting to be poly does not excuse cheating what is wrong with you people"
Look I agree cheating sucks and violates trust, but acting like it's the worst thing in the history of ever is just childish. I get it hurts but at the end of the day, you do not own another person's body and sometimes shit happens. I just do not care what other people do with their own bodies and you cannot make me believe I'm supposed to care. If my husband goes and fucks someone without my permission (which he commonly does) then that's rad. I hope he has fun. If my wife goes and fucks someone I don't know (which she regularly does) then fuck yeah I hope they both had fun. Y'all are too fucking uptight.
Also the tags
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The "monogamous people are losers and shouldn't get a say in anything" was something I said in reply to a heckler on my 'monogamous people often abuse poly partners' post. To take it solely as 100% serious opinion is foolish and childish.
"I cheated cuz waaa"
I've never cheated on any partner. The post isn't even saying it's ok cheat, it's saying that poly people get branded as cheaters whether they do or don't. But I'll say it here just because it's so controversial that it pisses losers off: it's ok for polyamorous people to cheat on monogamous partners. Get out before they abuse you.
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taurasiscntybun · 2 days ago
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But we’re roommates! Pt 2
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-College DT x nerdy reader
-18 plus minors DNI
-Warnings: Adult language, anxiety, internalized homophobia, descriptions of foreplay, virginity kink
-2,800 words
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Diana’s POV
I shove my headphone over my head, my hair pulled back in a loose ponytail, the curls threatening to escape. 50 cent blares in my ear as I cross through the hallway of the dormitory.
“Distracts me?” I mutter to myself. I don’t understand my weird ass roommate, it’s rare she actually talks to me, even rarer that she comes close. Maybe it’s for the best, if she knew the thoughts I had about her I'm sure she’d never speak to me again.
“Distracts me?” I mumble again, I’m stuck on that, it has to fucking mean something. Why would it bother her if I’m in my sports bra? I wish she wouldn’t walk around in her goddamn tank top and shorts, well not really, I think her thin sleep shirt is my favorite thing she owns. I let out a groan as I picture her, the thin fabric stretching over her tits.
“Fuck” I mumble and shake my head to clear the thoughts. If only she knew how distracting she was, I keep my music blaring so I don’t notice her. I already know today is going to be a waste in class. Not that I give two fucks about my English class, as long as I get a C I can keep my scholarship and keep playing basketball. I should care more, I’m the first in my family to go to college; I’m not gonna flunk out or some shit but I’m happy with getting by. I hate my English class the most, what the fuck am I learning by reading Beowulf and Pride and Prejudice? At least my roomie helps me with English, she’s so smart. I turn up the volume on my mp3 player, keeping my mind from drifting to thoughts about my nervous baby bunny. I wave to a few people as I walk through the green, I don’t know everyone but since my face was on the fucking school magazine everyone seems to know me. Finally I get to one of the biggest buildings on campus, it’s on the other side of the fucking campus from my dorm but at least most of my classes are here. I glance down at my watch and swear under my breath, I’m like five minutes late.
“Miss Taurasi, you do know class starts at nine, correct?” My professor says, a smug look on his face.
“Yes sir, I got held up this morning.” I reply and flop down in my seat, pulling out my notebook.
“It’s five minutes, can he fucking chillax?” I mumble under my breath as he drones on about the oral history of Beowulf. I should be paying attention, I should be taking notes, but I can’t stop thinking about my fucking roommate. The way my hands fit perfectly around her waist, her touching my shoulder, her soft voice saying I’m distracting plays over and over in my head. It means something, it has too; why would my sweaty body be distracting to her? I look up from my blank notebook, realizing.
”Fuck, she’s attracted to me.” I mutter without thinking and a few heads turn my way but I ignore them. Now all I want is my classes to be over so I can get back to my dorm.
“Oh god, shit.” You say and run your fingers through your hair. Your classes start a little later in the day, back to back history classes then humanities. You stare at Diana’s unmade bed and replay your conversation. You had admitted she was distracting, you’d said her body was distracting.
“God she’s gonna think I’m some lesbo weirdo.” You mutter and pace the small space.
”No.. no.. it’s normal to be distracted, she’s hot.” You try and reassure yourself but it doesn’t work, you know deep down that the feelings you have towards Diana aren’t platonic. You want to feel her big hands on you, her lips, her everything, you want to be consumed by her presence. She’s gorgeous, a mix of strong muscles and soft curves that make your mouth water.
“Don’t be weird, it’s fine, it’s fine.” You dress quickly, a tank top and loose cargo pants and hurry out the door for class; your mind clouded with anxiety with before class.
The rest of the day goes by in a droning bore, your classes blurring together as your stomach tumbles in anxiety. When your last class leaves you bolt for the door and race across campus to your dorm. Diana’s day ends before yours but she has practice so it’s fine.
“Calm down, calm down, its fine, she’s at practice and I’m sure she doesn’t even remember what I said this morning.” You mutter as you fit the key in your dorm room door. You swing it open and yelp as Diana looks up at you from her bed.
”Finally you're home, I didn't know when your last class ended.” She says and stands to come closer.
”No it’s Monday, your math class lets out at four and your practice starts at four-thirty, why are you here? It’s five?” You say and shake your head.
“You memorized my schedule?” She asks and cocks her head to the side, her hair is down for once and the dark curls bob as she turns her head.
”I..I..I wanted to know the times you wouldn’t be here, for.. for studying.” You stammer, still standing in the open doorway. Diana gives you a wolffish grin and takes another step towards you, she’s in touching distance now but she feels much closer, her large statue looming.
”Oh yes because I’m so distracting right?”
“Y..your music and..and..” You stammer but she cuts you off by grabbing you and pulling you into the room, the door clicking shut and locking behind her.
”We dont need to have this talk with the door open.” Diana says in a hushed tone, her hands still on your arms.
”And I know, you find me walking around in my sports bra very distracting right?” She taunts, her thumbs rubbing up and down your bare arms, leaving goosebumps along your skin.
”I..I..”
“Why does my body distract you Baby bunny?” She whispers, drawing you even closer.
”I’m not the genius you are but could I be distracting you because you find me hot?” She’s standing so close now you could count the freckles across her face, she looks down at you with a serious expression, something you're not used to. You look up at her slack jawed and you know you're blushing but you can’t stop. You try to think of something, anything to say to her but your mind is drawing a blank.
”Y..yes you..you are pretty but..but lots of g..girls are pretty.” You stammer and try to pull away but her grip tightens to nearly painful.
”Do you look at a lot of other girls?” She whispers and searches your face.
”I..I mean a normal amount, everyone notices pretty girls right? I mean you notice pretty girls right?” You answer nervously and look down. Diana moves one of her hands from your arm to under your chin and she tilts your head up gently to look at her.
”Oh yeah, I notice pretty girls, all the time, but then again I don’t notice boys.. if you understand what I mean. I definitely fucking notice you. You think I’m distracting? Baby I can hardly think when you're around, everything comes out in a rush of word vomit when you look at me with your big eyes.” She’s leaned down to you, your air mingling as her eyes dart from yours to your lips.
“Do you feel the same way baby? Am I right?” Diana says, her tone so hushed its barely audible over the roaring in your ears. The room feels too small, Diana too close, you can’t breathe let alone think. As if she can read your thoughts she takes a step back and lets go of your arms, raising her hands in surrender.
“Tell me I’m wrong, tell me to fuck off and I’ll never bring it up again, I’ll even wear a shirt all the time.“ Her eyes search your face and you can see the quiet vulnerability in her face. You’re frozen, not able to deny how you feel but not knowing what to say either. Diana looks at you concerned and then a look of understanding crosses over her face.
“You’re new to liking girls aren’t you? Or rather new to admitting it to yourself?” Her tone is soft and her gaze warm. She sits on her bed and pats the place next to her.
“It’s ok, everyone’s been there.” You take a tentative step towards her, trying to think of anything to say.
“If you don’t say anything cause you’re scared of rejection, don’t be.” Diana says in a hushed tone and you sit, she immediately puts her hand on your thigh, nothing scandalous just resting on your knee but it was enough to get your blood heating.
“I don’t know why I feel this way about… about you.” You say softly and turn to look at her.
“Are you attracted to me? Do you get distracted by my body because it turns you on? You don’t understand why I affect you… it’s nothing I did baby, you just like women.” Diana says and grins, her touch on your thigh turning teasing as she traced patterns on your inner thigh; the calluses on her long fingers leaving goosebumps under your pants.
“It’s ok, I feel the same way, I want you baby, fuck I want to kiss you all the time, I want you to come to my games in my jersey. I want to devour you.” Her tone dropped as she spoke and she squeezed your thigh for emphasis on the last part. You let out a hushed whimper and she moved closer, her hand moving up your thigh.
“You gotta say something babygirl, I’m not going to keep touching you unless I’m sure you want it.” She starts to pull away and immediately you feel the loss of contact and speak before thinking.
“No please keep touching me. Fuck I want you to touch me please.” You admit and she grinned.
“Thank fuck.” Diana groans and doesn’t give you a chance to respond before pulling you in tight, her lips crashing into yours. You freeze, your body locking up under the foreign touch.
“Come on baby, let go, let me show you how I good I can make you feel.” Diana says and kisses down your neck.
“Don’t think, just feel; you want me to keep touching you? Well I want you to touch me too, give in baby.” She almost begs and her soft suck on your pulse point makes you come undone. You melt against her, and pull her down for another kiss. Your kiss is clumsy and unpracticed but passionate; Diana’s hand comes up behind you and tangles in your hair, tilting your head back as she takes control. She slows your kiss, her mouth moving against yours with practiced ease.
“God you don’t know what you do to me.” Diana practically growls and pulls away a bit.
“Talk to me baby.” She begs and strokes your back.
”Im sorry I..I’m not good at this at uh talking about stuff.” You manage to say and she grins.
“No apologies baby, you don’t need to try, just be you.” She kisses down your jaw and you gasp.
“O..Ok” you say in a breathy tone, collecting yourself a bit.
”I like you, i really like you in a way I haven’t liked another girl before and I didn't know what to do or how to act because i didn't want you to think I’m a freak but then that meant you needed to stay away from me because my like brain stops working when you're around.” Your words tumble out a fast long sentence and Diana pulls away to process your words.
“Firstly I dont think you're a freak, I’m actually super fucking happy that you have feelings for me because fuck I’ve wanted you since you walked into this dorm all wide eyed and excited the first day.” She smiles and pulls you close again, this time in a tight hug, Diana was successfully breaking your walls down, bit by little bit. She waited until she felt you relax in her embrace to speak.
“When you see me walking around in my underwear what are you thinking baby?” She whispers against your hair, her tone low.
”I..I..” You start to stutter in response.
”You tell me and I’ll tell you what I’m thinking when I see you in your cute little pajamas.” She teases, moving her head down to whisper in your ear.
“I..I think about your body and.. and how much I like it and want to touch you. I..I think about your boobs probably too much and your uh sweaty sports bras hide little.” You admit and pull away again, sitting next to her. Diana raises her eyebrows in question.
”My…boobs?” She asks and looks down at her somewhat flat chest.
“Yes yes I think about them all the time, every time I see you without a bra at night or when you walk around after practice. God Diana were you not doing that on purpose?” You ask, you're softening, feeling more comfortable with her now that your crush was out in the open. Diana laughs and shakes her head incredulously.
”I honestly just started dressing in here because it seemed to annoy you and you look so adorable when you're mad but you weren’t mad were you? You were horny?” She hooks a finger in your belt loop and tugs you towards her, forcing your body to angle to her. You blush and look down at your hands in your lap.
“Nah baby dont get shy on me now, you were just telling me how much you like my boobs.” Diana’s hands cover yours and you tilt your head to look at her.
“Do you wanna see ‘em baby?” Her voice drops to a whisper and she looks down at you with heat in her gaze. You suddenly realize yes, you’d very much like to see her boobs and the rest of her.
”Yes, Diana I..I want you.” You say in a shaky tone and bite your lip. She lets out a groan in response.
“Ok , you can have me but fuck that means I get you, I get to really know you, you gotta let me in.” Dianas words came out in almost a plea, she needed you as much as you needed her right now.
“Yes I promise Dee you can-“
”Don’t call me that.” She cuts you off abruptly and you look at her in confusion.
”But everyone calls you that?”
“Yeah but you aren’t everyone and you’ve never called me Dee, I uh I like that you're the only one that calls me by my full name. To everyone Im Dee or DT but you have always called me Diana.” She brings your hands to her lips and kisses across your knuckles; you're left breathless by the reverence in her touch.
”Diana I promise I’ll be myself, I want you, I don’t want to hide from you anymore.” You admit to her as she kisses your knuckles again.
“Thank god baby, now I want to touch you, I want to touch you everywhere, can I?” Diana asks softly and drags her big hands up your arms.
“I wanna show you how much I like you.” Her thumbs hook under the thin straps of your tank top and pulls them down your shoulders.
”I..I dont know what to do, i.. I’ve never..” You stutter and she groans low in her throat.
”Fuck are you telling me you're a virgin?” Her thumbs move in small circles on your shoulders as she looks down at you predatorily.
“Y..yeah I uh have never with uh anyone.” You say quietly, a touch embarrassed.
”But you want me to touch you right? You want me to make you cum dont you baby bunny?” She asks in a raspy tone, dipping her head to kiss down your neck.
“Y.yes Diana p..please.” You say and let your head lull to the side giving her more access.
“Mhhmm you're so beautiful.” She said against your skin, one hand fisted in your hair to gently lean your head and her other hand wandered up your body, teasing at the hem of your shirt.
“Diana please I..I want you to make me cum I… I want you.” You whine and arch your back into her touch, your body automatically knowing what to do. Diana chuckles against your skin and places one more kiss on your pulse point before pulling away.
“Ok baby but first I need you out of these clothes.” She leans down and starts untying your sneakers, her long finger moving deftly as she undoes the knot and slips the shoe off you.
“Lay back, lemme take care of you.” She says softly and kisses your inner ankle sending a buzz of heat through your body. Diana repeats her actions with your other shoe then stands.
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letmerideitchris · 1 day ago
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𐬺𝐕𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐𐬺
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summary: Chris matt and nick get a new videographer, she is funny, smart and pretty, basically everything Chris could ever want in a girl. Chris finds it impossible to not fall for her…
Warnings: angst, yelling, cursing, mentions of killing (in a joking way)
Wc: 1009
𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟏
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“Chris would you like to tell us what the fuck we just walked in on?” matt says sternly
Y/n had previously left the house out of embarrassment to what nick and matt had walked into.
“does anyone know where some bleach is? My eyes need some” nick says looking around
“guys you're being dramatic, I'm sorry i couldn’t resist, she’s everything i have ever wanted” chris says as he looks down at the floor
“that is the least of our problems right now, shes meant to be coming over tomorrow to film a vlog for us, that is going to be so awkward thanks to you dick face” nick says hitting chris’ shoulder
“yeah chris, you need to sort it out and apologize because you are runing it for us”
“but I'm not sorry and i am quite looking forward to seeing her tomorrow even though it will be awkward…” Chris says slightly smiling at the thought of her
“im not sure if shes looking forward to seeing you, she just ran away” matt says looking at the open front door y/n previously left through.
“chris you make me want to kill you, is it hard being this dumb?”
“guys can you show some sort of sympathy? Like imagine the girl of your dreams is actually interested in you and then your brothers walk in on you fucking and she runs out of embarrassment?” chris says
“No i actually cannot imagine that i am gay if you forgot dumb shit” nick says in a duh tone
“you guys are ridiculous” chris mumbles annoyed as he makes his way downstairs to his bedroom.
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The next morning chris is laying in bed half asleep, wishing she was beside him. But hes quickly taken out of his trance when he hears the doorbell, the sound he was dreading yesterday but wishing upon now.
“i’ll get it!” matt yells from upstairs
But when he turns to the door chris is already unlocking it
Nick is sitting on the couch with an unamused face, when matt looks over at him “look at this desperate dickhead”
“hes never gonna learn, fuck sake” nick eyerolls
When chris opens the door, y/n is taken aback by his face. y/n looks down at the floor and says quietly “oh… hi chris”
chris’ smile quickly fades as he hears her tone and realizes his excitement isn't mutual.
“hi y/n, come upstairs, can I get you a water or?-”
“uh no i should be good..thanks..”
Chris takes a seat on the couch wondering why y/n is acting so weird towards him. What did he do wrong? Did he say something bad?
The boys all give y/n a hug greeting her, besides chris.
“matt would you mind getting me some water? I’m really thirsty?” y/n says looking at matt
Chris looks over at her with a confused look across his face
“yeah of course, nick can you come with me, i think these two need to talk it out..” matt lowers his tone at the end so only nick can hear his last comment
Chris and y/n are both sitting on opposite sides of the couch looking at each other waiting for one to speak up.
“y/n, whats wrong?” chris speaks up
“have a think chris, have a think.”
Chris is using all of his brain and is trying to peice together what could be wrong. And then something clicks in his mind and realizes what has happened. He looks up with a concerned look on his face
“is this about yesterday, y/n? If it is im really sor-”
y/n cuts him off “chris do you not realize what we did and how this will affect our relationship and my job”
Chris is shocked by what she said “wait so your saying you regret what we did? I-I really thought we had something, something that would last, something you would care about” he says as he raises his voice and stands up angrily from the couch.
“no i don't regret it, that's not what I'm saying. I just think we should've been more careful or waited a bit longer” y/n says avoiding eye contact
“so you do regret it huh?” he starts to walk off then she grabs him by the arm
“no, chris just calm down i am not done-”
“well i sure am, get out of my house please”
y/n opens her purse quxckly, chris is standing there waiting for something that could save this relationship but instead it is something that will change their lives forever.
y/n slides a positive pregnancy test along the coffee table.
“as i was saying, we should've been more careful, should've waited longer, not saying i regret it.” she says shaking with tears forming on her waterline
She closes her purse, gets up, looks into the kitchen to see matt and nick both staring in such a state of shock. Tears start rolling down her face as she looks back at chris’ guilty and worried face. She wipes her tears and continues to leave.
The door slams
“i could choke you to death right now chris, not much is stopping me” nick says furiously as he follows y/n out of the house
Chris is still standing there in disbelief staring at that positive test.
“chris, ill get you some water, all you can do right now is sit down and try and relax yourself. Don't text anyone and don't listen to what nick is saying even though he is right, i know you would be really stressed right now and nothing he has to say will help.” matt says patting chris on the back gently
chris sits down on the couch shaking with tears falling down his face onto his pants, he can't seem to look away from the test. Regret and guilt clouds his mind and all he is thinking about is y/n.
“m-matt” chris stutters, matt turns back around to face chris, you can tell even matt is stressed out
“i, i am going to be a d - dad”
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𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @riggysworld @chrissturnsss @sophand4n4
@chrispycremedonut
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icarusredwings · 10 hours ago
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Thinking about old Worst Wolverine being called by each of the X men individually after they have a falling out because Logan injured a child very badly to the point the only reason they didn't die is because another classmates healing abilities all while he just... walked away.
Well- ran.. away... leaving a child to die. He's tried to explain thousands of times that he blacked out, that he didn't remember doing any of this. He tries to say that maybe it was someone else, that mystique did this shit all the time in his universe.
"Yeah, well!? This isn't your universe! Because the REAL Logan would never do this.." Scott screams at him as Logan leaves the Mansion for the last time. He doesn't come back. He didn't even get to tell his Xkits goodbye. It got to the point where Laura dropped out, taking Gabby with her, wanting nothing to do with the school anymore.
So now, here he is. In Maine, an old fisherman, part-time hunter, and the only people he lets around him have healing factors.
He lives with Wade, who still- by the way- doesn't have any grey hairs (maybe because hes bald but- yk)
One night, while Logan is out, making himself feel useful by feeding the small town they're in, providing for more poor families, feeding their children's hungry mouths and asking nothing in return but respect. (It gets to the point that the children cheer when they see Logan, wanting to hug him, but he growls at them to get off, too afraid of hurting them) Wade finally awnsers the ringing phone.
"What." There's vemon in his tone, but soon his eyes widden, and he frowns.
Walking outside he stands there a moment, knowing Logan can hear him.
He ignores him, looking at the fish, litsening, his breathing slowing as he skewers some with his claws. Its not exactly spear fishing but- close.
"What?" His voice is almost annoyed, as if knowing what his long time Husband was about to ask him.
"Logan.."
"No."
"Logan-"
He shakes his head. "Don't care."
"...She's missing."
He pauses, turning after scraping the dead fish into a bucket. "Who's missing?"
"There's a little girl missing."
"So?"
"Logan!"
"I'm not helping them, Wade. That's final." He growls.
For a moment, Wade frowns, but he didn't learn to obey thy husband like the bible said.
He never did.
"Logan, there's a 6 year old out there. All alone. Cold. Probably going to be eaten by wolves!" He shouts from the back porch, knowing his place enough to stay here and not come near his fish. Even after all these years, Logan was still finicky over his food. "And all because some old fart won't help her!"
The silence thickened as Logan thought about it, the hero side of his brain yelling 'We'll find her!' And the hurt old part of him saying 'That's not my buisness.'
".. You find her then." He compromises.
"I can't! And if anyone knows those Canadian woods, it's you! You said you knew those forests like the back of your hand!" Wade protests. "If I could smell someone through miles of freezing snow, I would. But I can't. So here I am, asking The Wolverine to go do what he does best."
He grunts, glaring. "And that is?"
"Helping a little girl get back to her mommy..." Wade says, knowing that he was sold. He knew he was sold the moment he told him to do it himself. "She doesn't have much time, Logan." He sighs, putting a cherry on top.
The greyed man huffed, grumbling under his breath for a moment. "Who will stay here with the dog?"
"Gabby can! She loves gabs." Gott'em.
"What about Laura? Why can't she find her?"
Shit.
"Logan, Laura has barley been in those woods. You've lived in them for years. So. What will it be. Pull up your panties and go save a little girls life? Or do it anyway when our baby girl gets lost too?"
Logan scoffs, disappointed. "..She wouldn't get lost.."
"She would if the scent kept being blown away.."
Wade adds, seeing the 'god damn it, he's right.' look on the old mans brow.
He lets out a large sigh. "...I don't want any help."
"Oh well too fucking bad bucko, I'm gonna go pack my snow suit!"
"No! I mean... I don’t want any help from THEM.."
"No promises. I'm not letting poor Susie die just because you have a grudge. Now put your fish in the freezer and lets go! They're coming to pick us up-"
"I ain't flying!!" Logan snarls, watching as his lover ran off, having a deep feeling that he would be in the air shortly..
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fuck-customers · 3 days ago
Note
I can tolerate helping customers with technology things that are specific to my store. Such as how to connect to the wifi (you have request to connect on your settings and then a popup will appear that asks you to put in your email + name to use the wifi. I just tell people to put "No No [email protected]" It is admittedly slightly complex) or how to navigate the store's website. It can get annoying and repetitive, but I can tolerate it because these are things that are specific to my job/store, so the general public would not organically know these things.
However it is not part of my job, nor will I make it part of my job to teach you how to use your own phone, including, but not limited to:
-walking you through step-by-step on how to access a website. And I mean "go to your browser. Well what browser so you have on your phone? Firefox? Chrome? Chrome is the one that looks like the Simon game. Firefox has a fox on the logo, hence the name. Ok go to the address bar. The address bar at the top of the page. That long horizontal white rectangle at the top of the page. The TOP of the page." Etc etc
-walking you through how to download an app in the same fashion as the above bullet. If you don't know what the app store is, you don't get the coupon. Sorry. I'm entirely too burnt out for this shit.
-straight up handling YOUR phone??? Hello? Do not hand me your phone. I don't know you or where you or your phone have been. I will not be touching it.
-similar to the last point: taking a screenshot/teaching you how to take a screenshot on YOUR phone? I'm not a tech wiz, but I think it's different based on what make+model of phone you have and I can't tell what kind of phone it is just by looking at it. And more importantly, I don't want to, nor do I get paid enough to.
-what your password is?? For your app or email? How the actual fuck am I supposed to know that? I don't even know you, but I somehow know your password? Based on the intelligence you're currently displaying, I would assume your password must be "ABCD1234"
There's probably more that I'm forgetting. I could kind of understand these if I was a tech support person or worked in a technology-based store, but I work in a regular ass store. The only connection we have to technology is that we have registers and phones in the store.
On iPhone The address bar is on the bottom in Safari.
But seriously I tell them I am not allowed to touch their phone per company policy. If they ask why that's a policy (and for some reason they all do) I say "a cashier once dropped the customers phone and the store won't pay to repair it, so to keep that from happening again we are not allowed to touch it."
C: "but the last one did it for me."
Me: If they want to break policy and risk their job that's on them but I can't afford to get fired."
-Rodney
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wholelottaprompts · 19 hours ago
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ᡣ𐭩 Emails I Can't Send Prompts ᡣ𐭩
from the album Emails I Can't Send, by Sabrina Carpenter
"And I still make excuses for you constantly."
"Sorry that I pulled the 'it's not you, it's me.'"
"You're not my friend, and baby, you never were."
"It's times like these I wish I had a time machine."
"Whatever, you're a waste of time."
"I can't myself when you get close to me."
“Oh, so you do have a type."
"Where else can we go?"
"I hate the way you left me dry."
"Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it."
"Don't say sorry now."
"One day, I'll make sure you get a real apology."
"I tried to look for the best in the worst."
"Oh, so you can reply."
"I'm so tired."
"You want me? I'm done."
"I wonder how many things you think about before you get to me."
"You're lucky I'm a private person."
"I'm over that son of a bitch."
"Don't make me cuss you out."
"You're so vicious."
"Nobody gets my jokes, everyone here thinks I'm fucking rude."
"Why were you somewhere else when you were next to me?"
"I can't help it, it's a habit."
"You act like a bitch."
"I never saw him and we never kissed."
"There's nothing left here to decode."
"Were you lying to me and the family?"
"If you wanted brown eyes, I could have got contacts."
"You don't feel remorse."
"That never made too much sense to me."
"I can't read your mind."
"Why'd you let me down?"
"You knew I would see that."
"Looking at you got me thinking nonsense."
"Bet you wanna love me now."
"How do you do this to me?"
"Tell me what's gonna happen."
"You knew I would notice."
"I'll drive you home."
"I don't even know, I'm talking nonsense."
"I want you there sometimes."
"She looks nothing like me."
"Your signals are mixed."
"Everything reminds me of you."
"I know you know it keeps me up."
"You drive me crazy."
"Chase me."
"Did you even give a fuck?"
"You disgust me."
"Now I'm a homewrecker. I'm a slut."
"Tell me I was more than just a decent opportunity."
"Why do you look so happy?"
"I'm so sorry for your loss."
"Thanks to you, I can't love right."
"I know now even if I tried to change that somehow, you'd end up with her anyway."
"You fit every stereotype."
"Does she step out of the spotlight so you bathe in it?"
"Now I can't even look at you."
"You said I'm too late to be your first love, but I'll always be your favorite."
"I know what you're about to say."
"Does she get up on top of you more than I would?"
"He had it coming."
"I deserve my own consideration."
"I look up from my phone and think there's no chance it's you, but it is."
"He's good for my heart, but he's bad for business."
"I've got death threats filling up semi trucks."
"How am I supposed to close the door when I still need the closure?"
"All my friends think I've gone crazy."
"I care, but I don't."
"Please fucking fix this."
"Tell me that you miss me in your life."
"It feels so good not caring where you are tonight."
"You were all I looked up to."
"Was I being lied to?"
"I got ways to find you anywhere."
"You miss me? No duh."
"Maybe we should do this on purpose sometime."
"It was all so innocent."
"What the fuck is patience?"
"I can't even stomach loving someone else."
"God, I love you, but you're such a dipshit."
"You're good at impersonating someone who cares."
"I bet your house is where my other sock is."
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scrollonso · 1 day ago
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Ghost — Strollonso (ft. Nikola)
@boxboxluckybird saw it first + an add-on to First Kiss
The night was quiet, except for the soft hum of the wind brushing against the windows. Fernando sat at the kitchen table, staring at a half-empty glass of whiskey he wasn’t sure he wanted to finish. The divorce had left his house emptier than it had ever been, the silence suffocating, a constant reminder of everything that had gone wrong. Fourteen years Fernando had spent married to Lance. Seventeen years they'd had a son together. All for nothing.
The sound of footsteps broke the stillness, tentative at first, then more deliberate. Fernando looked up to see Nikola standing in the doorway, his face pale, his eyes red-rimmed and glistening with tears. Fernando’s heart clenched. He knew that look. It was the same one Lance had whenever the world felt like it was crumbling around him — whenever the world was crumbling around him.
“Nik?” Fernando’s voice was softer than he expected, his usual sharpness dulled by concern. “What’s wrong, mijo?”
Nikola didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he stepped into the room, his arms wrapped tightly around himself like he was trying to hold himself together — trying to hold the closest thing he had to Lance. His lower lip trembled, and when he finally spoke, his voice was raw and cracked.
“Do I look like him?”
Fernando blinked, startled by the question. “What?”
“Do I look like him?” Nikola repeated, his voice breaking. He stepped closer, his movements shaky, like he was being pulled forward by some invisible force. “Is that why you… why you treat me like this? Why you barely look at me? Because I remind you of him?”
“Nikola, mi amor, that’s not—” Fernando started, but Nikola cut him off with a sudden, anguished outburst.
“¡Ya basta! Don’t lie to me, Papa!” Nikola’s voice rose, thick with emotion. “You can’t stand to look at me, can you? Because I look like the one person in the world who loved you unconditionally, and you bailed on him. You left him because you were fucking scared!”
Fernando’s breath caught in his throat. He opened his mouth to respond, but the words wouldn’t come.
“Scared of this,” Nikola continued, tears streaming down his cheeks as he motioned towards himself, convinced he was the one that drove his fathers apart. “Of having a family. Of having me. Having me with a man. You were so scared that you ran away from the best thing that ever happened to you, and now… now I’m here, and you can’t even look at me without seeing him, without remembering what you lost.”
“Nikola Díaz. Stop—” Fernando tried again, but Nikola wouldn’t let him.
“Are you ashamed of me?” Nikola asked, his voice trembling, every word cutting deeper than the last. “Is that it? Am I the reminder of everything you couldn’t handle? Everything you didn’t want? Do you hate me because of him? Because I'm a Stroll?”
Fernando stood abruptly, the metal of the chair beneath him scraping harshly against the floor. “Nikola, stop it!” he snapped, his voice cracking under the weight of his own guilt.
But Nikola didn’t flinch. He just stood there, shaking, his eyes locked on his father’s, pleading for an answer. “Do you love me? Did you love him?” he whispered. “Because it doesn’t feel like it, Papa."
Fernando felt like the air had been sucked out of the room. He took a step toward his son, then hesitated, his hands trembling at his sides. How could he explain the storm of emotions that had consumed him since the divorce? The shame, the regret, the unbearable weight of knowing he’d failed the two people he’d loved most in the world?
“You look like him,” Fernando finally admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. Nikola flinched as though struck, but Fernando kept going, his words tumbling out in a desperate attempt to bridge the growing chasm between them. “You look like him, and it kills me every single day because I can’t look at you without thinking about how much I screwed up. How much I hurt him. How much I hurt you.”
Nikola’s breath hitched, but he didn’t say anything, his eyes wide and shining with fresh tears.
“I’m not ashamed of you,” Fernando continued, his voice thick with emotion. “I could never be ashamed of you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Nikola. But every time I see you, I see him. I see the man I loved more than anything, the man I let down because I was too scared to face what we had, what we could’ve been.”
Tears spilled down Fernando’s cheeks now, his composure cracking under the weight of his confession. “I was scared, yes. Scared of being a father. Scared of being with a man. Scared of failing you both. And in the end, that fear made me do exactly what I was afraid of. I failed. I failed him, and I failed you.”
Nikola’s lips quivered, and for a moment, he just stood there, staring at his father. Then, with a sob, he rushed forward, throwing his arms around Fernando and burying his face in his chest. Fernando froze for half a second before wrapping his arms tightly around his son, holding him like he was afraid to let go.
“I’m sorry,” Fernando choked out, his voice muffled against Nikola’s hair. “I’m so sorry, hijo. For everything. For hurting you. For not being there. For making you feel like you weren’t enough. You are enough. You’ve always been enough.”
Nikola clung to him, his sobs wracking his small frame, and for the first time in years, Fernando let himself cry too. They stood there in the kitchen, father and son, broken but holding onto each other, trying to piece together the fragments of what had been shattered.
They stayed locked in the embrace, their shared grief filling the space that silence had once suffocated. Fernando’s grip on Nikola tightened, as if by holding on to his son, he could make up for all the lost time, all the mistakes that had created this chasm between them. The warmth of Nikola’s trembling body in his arms was a reminder that despite everything, he was still here, still his son, and still someone Fernando had a chance to fight for.
After a long moment, Nikola’s sobs began to subside, his breathing slowing into uneven hiccups. He pulled back slightly, just enough to look up at his father with tear-streaked cheeks and swollen eyes. “Do you think he hates you?” he asked, his voice barely a whisper.
Fernando’s heart twisted painfully. The question hit him harder than any of Nikola’s earlier accusations because it was the one he had been asking himself for years. He sighed, brushing a hand over Nikola’s hair, smoothing down the wild curls that reminded him so much of Lance.
“I don’t know,” he admitted honestly, his voice heavy with regret. “I hope not. I hope… I hope he knows how much I loved him — how much I love him — even if I didn’t show it the way I should have. Even if I messed everything up.”
Nikola searched his father’s face, his expression a mixture of sorrow and something Fernando couldn’t quite place. “I don’t think he hates you,�� Nikola said after a moment, his voice fragile but sincere. “He never talked badly about you. Even when things were bad, even after the divorce, he always said you loved me. That you loved us.”
Fernando swallowed hard, his throat tightening. “He said that?”
Nikola nodded. “He never wanted me to think you didn’t care. Even when I was mad at you, he… he always defended you.”
Fernando closed his eyes, overwhelmed by the weight of Nikola’s words. Lance’s forgiveness, his enduring belief in Fernando’s love, was more than he felt he deserved. And yet, it was the lifeline he didn’t know he’d been waiting for.
“I wish I could fix it,” Fernando whispered, his voice breaking again. “I wish I could take it all back and do it right. For him. For you.”
Nikola’s lip trembled, but he reached out, placing his hand over Fernando’s. “Maybe you can’t fix the past,” he said softly, “but you can still fix us.”
Fernando looked at his son, his chest aching with a mixture of pain and hope. He saw Lance in Nikola’s eyes, but for the first time, it didn’t feel like a curse. It felt like a second chance. A chance to love his son the way Lance would have wanted. The way they both deserved.
“I’ll try,” Fernando promised, his voice steady despite the tears still clinging to his lashes. “I’ll do everything I can to make it better, Nik. I swear to you, mijo.”
Nikola nodded, his fingers tightening around his father’s hand. “That’s all I wanted, Papa. For you to try.”
They stood in the kitchen for what felt like an eternity, the hum of the wind outside now a soft lullaby to their shared pain and tentative healing. When Nikola finally let go, his movements hesitant but lighter, he wiped at his face with the sleeve of his shirt.
“Can I stay here tonight?” he asked quietly, his voice small, like he was afraid Fernando might say no.
Fernando’s heart broke all over again at the thought of Nikola feeling like he had to ask. “Of course,” he said firmly. “This is your home, Nik. It always will be.”
Nikola gave him a weak smile, the first hint of light Fernando had seen in his son’s eyes all night. Without another word, he turned and headed toward the living room, curling up on the couch the way he used to when he was little and afraid of the dark.
Fernando watched him go, his heart heavy but filled with a sense of purpose he hadn’t felt in years. He grabbed a blanket from the hallway closet and draped it over Nikola, pressing a kiss to his son’s temple as he whispered, “Te amo, mijo. Always.”
Nikola murmured something in return, his voice slurred with exhaustion, and Fernando smiled faintly as he returned to the kitchen. The whiskey sat untouched on the table, but this time, Fernando didn’t pick it up. Instead, he poured it down the sink and stood there for a moment, staring out into the night.
The wind brushed against the windows again, but this time it didn’t feel so suffocating. It felt like a reminder that life was still moving, still offering chances to make things right. And for the first time in a long time, Fernando felt like he was ready to take it.
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gyuuberryy · 3 days ago
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No fucking way, that bitch accused you too? WTH
https://www.tumblr.com/aifairy/767667992231280640/not-sure-but-this-fic-genuinely-seemed-odd-when-i?source=share
LMAOO I CACKLED WHEN I READ THAT POST THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME KNOW😂 They're using free AI checkers online and claim that they "can tell if a fic was AI generated or not". These may not really be professional credentials, but I am a computer science student(IB Higher level that too!!) AND planning to pursue it in uni, so I know enough about AI. Using AI for unethical work is..well unethical! Which is why I've never used it for writing fanfics, a purpose that doesn't really hold a lot of importance in people's lives??? AI generates the same ugly, repetitive response everytime so I wouldn't even think about resorting to it, and I don't see how Fatal Trouble shows that pattern.
@aifairy claims that chatgpt generated a similar response to my fic. first of all, the images they've attached are not the same as what I've written at all. it's talking about sunghoon giving a bite mark on the reader's neck and her thinking about the night it happened. HELLO HAVE YOU READ THE FIC? he hasn't bitten her even ONCE??? there was just a suggestive allusion to it in the end. And seriously? They're using AI checkers like ZeroGPT and GPTZero for this? Hilarious.
I can assure you I've never wasted my time by using AI to write my fics like I couldn't even think about it. Here are some things about me which will hopefully make my intentions of writing on this platform clearer:
I've been writing online since the age of 13(2020) I don't think most of the population knew about generative AI. I used to be on wattpad before tumblr and my writing has improved quite a bit since then. I joined Tumblr in 2022 and wrote a fic about the show Wednesday(again, generative AI was not trendy, where I live atleast)So what I'm trying to say is I've been writing A LONG time before language modeling AIs became trendy. I've never switched to them.
Writing and reading has been a passionate hobby of mine since I was very young. I've received several academic proficiency awards for high level subjects in english literature, english language as well other languages at school, my works have been published in my school magazines and literary competitions multiple times. I have absolutely no problem in coming up with good content and am able to execute it properly as well.
I dedicate a good amount of time every week to writing. I only stick to fanfics online, because they're more popular and in demand than writing stories with your own OCs from my experience. I want to work on writing actual stories but I'm still a school going student so I don't have enough time for that. And at the same time on tumblr I get to connect with people who share the same interest as me :)
So basically what I want to say is I do not use and have NEVER used AI to write fics, I have not used it for Fatal Trouble or any other fics from my master list. I'm literally putting out fics I've worked hard on for FREE on this platform so others from the same fantom can enjoy it as well. Be respectful about it and stop being discouraging. DON'T LIKE IT DON'T READ IT. Writing on this account helps me improve my skills and get feedback. I don't care about what someone random online accuses me of, because ik that irl, my family, teachers and friends are aware about my skills and support me and I'm doing well in them as well :)) so I'm not going to be discouraged and stop writing<33
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yiiiiiiiikes25 · 1 day ago
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been cogitating on this for a minute. i'm irked by my own bottomless appetite for validation, but am deeply, deeply turned off by--like, experience visceral disgust and anxiety about--the notion that any praise i get could be pro forma or unearned. the idea that a reader owes an author anything at all makes me fucking itch. on the other hand--
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i don't think this is a universal truth and i don't know how @gallusrostromegalus (sorry you're out here catching strays) intended this term, but "social recognition euphoria" is a useful one, imo. here's how i think of it--
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that's social recognition euphoria, or it's how i use the term: something about who i am and something about who you are led us to this strip of sidewalk, where we recognized each other. what a fucking joy, or per @kamaela, magic. hats here could be same appetites, same characterizations, same aesthetics, same perversions, same...whatever you've got. i jumped fandoms because i same-hatted so hard with @garagepaperback on the basis of her lateral mind for language and the ambition in her writing.
it's sour, to me, that we call stats 'engagement,' especially kudos. @eleadore's callout re: conflation of attention and community is completely on the money, but i want to go a step further--let's picture kudos as a little public 'cool hat' tally. 'cool hat,' though, isn't necessarily 'same hat.' 'cool hat' is transactional, quantitative instead of qualitative, flattening--and perfectly nice, as long as you don't then wander the neighborhood checking out everybody else's tally. i think a lot of us do, myself included, and that is a bummer. (i'm personally curious whether kudos have a homogenizing effect on the kind of stuff we all make as we respond to the natural impulse to craft popular hats.)
so, the attention/community divide: inasmuch as i have a point here (do i?), what i think a lot of us are hungry for is a fuckin' hat discussion. the degree to which community nourishes us, the factor that makes it durable and personal and meaningful, hinges on the depth and specificity of recognition communicated in the "same hat" moment we're offered. it is fundamentally qualitative, not quantitative. it nourishes in a way a kudos count can't and shouldn't. it's why, for instance, a cheerleader-librarian like @kamaela or @sitp-recs ends up being glue for community, absolutely vital connective tissue.
to be clear, we aren't owed this nourishment--nobody asked us for these fucking hats, dude--but we are for sure going for a lot of walks in interesting headgear, or to ape @garagepaperback's metaphor, leaving a lot of signed hat piles lying around in a public hat archive. if the social recognition euphoria didn't mean anything to us i'd bet we'd largely keep our hats in our houses. if we're counting the social recognition euphoria we've lost our way a little bit, because it's not a countable thing.
i think what many of us aren't saying is that we hope, in a secret and shameful way, that our stats will function as tangible social proof: we wear the hat everyone likes best, and we made it ourselves. our hat is exceptional. we are exceptional. this is a bummer of a hope; regardless, we lay our hat carefully in the public hat archive; we check, privately and obsessively, as we let go of the idea that our hat will be the one hat to rule them all, whether our hat is even as good as everyone else's. what an exceptionally lonely thing. i'd like to do less of it.
not for nothing, in the course of developing co-writing and editing relationships, my crew's come up with a phrase for the deepest form of same-hatting: 'wet brain,' as in pressing our wet brains together, as though these same-hat boys took off their hats and then their hair and scalps and skulls and sat together to create. i would imagine that there are huge appetites for structures and practices in fandom that make that kind of intimacy, that heroin-shot of social recognition euphoria, easier for newcomers to find.
re - your last post, as a writer i find that to be an absurd take. people who write exclusively for validation probably shouldn't. if discovering your work is enjoyed and loved - just privately - is a dealbreaker for you, i think there are probably bigger issues that need to be worked through. the idea that we write fic for free and yet this discussion about "payment" through kudos/comments persists is so backwards and obnoxious.
sorry to tag you on this, obv you have nothing to do with op, but i just wanted to say - as a writer recs are a HUGE deal. to know that you liked something enough to share it with others is the biggest compliment for me personally. thanks for doing what you do.
I’m happy you reached out because this is a really interesting perspective. I definitely see increased messaging around comments = payment that pressures readers into thinking they are required to leave comments, and I agree that there are many layers in this convo that point out to a not-so-healthy relationship with fandom.
I find it hard to join this discussion not being an author myself, because I only have the privileged perspective. Ofc I understand how important feedback can be to boost newcomers and those who don’t feel part of the community. We all deal with insecurity in different ways and it’s hard to navigate a big fandom when you don’t have a group of friends to rely on. In the end the fandom experience is about a sense of belonging and it saddens me to realize that I might be part of the problem since my recs only reach Tumblr and my ao3 comments are far and few in between.
It’s funny because my blog has always targeted other readers: at the beginning I didn’t even tag authors and did not expect them to find or engage with my posts. Over the years the recs became more and more personal, until I realized I was writing them for myself. Sure, they are love letters to the fic and might help more people find them, but at the end of the day this is my little therapy corner where I can let go and babble around to my heart’s content 🙏🏼 I’ve always been proud of this blog and seeing that post gave me mixed feelings about it for the first time, so thank you for your message!
Again, I think this discussion has many layers and I’m a bit wary to get involved being a humble reader, but I’d be curious to see how others feel about it…
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