#like. this is not a man who is capable of normal balanced emotions or loving someone in a healthy way

[cinnamonest]

Anon at literally any given moment my brain is consumed with thoughts of Goro, I have so many Goro concepts that gnaw at my mind at all times

One specific one though is a PhantomThief!Darling.

One of his classmates, perhaps, even though you don’t see him that much given his frequent absences, or someone he met through his ventures in the entertainment industry. Someone he managed to get close to, was able to talk to him enough that he opened up to you, and as much as it frustrates him to acknowledge even just to himself, he has an emotional attachment.

Regardless, his beloved darling, the one person that brings him some semblance of joy and comfort in his life, the one person he allows himself to feel genuine affection for, who doesn't get pushed back to arm's length like everyone else. And thereby, someone he's vulnerable to, someone he trusts, someone he holds dear, even if he hasn't been honest with you about the full extent of those feelings.

That’s why it makes him so angry, when he finds out.

The first time, it catches him so off-guard, the whole composed presentation he usually carefully maintains, completely slips off for a second, leaving him stunned and slack-jawed.

He was going to meet you, you know, to catch up, and you gladly accepted that. You said something about how you felt guilty for taking up his time — it’s admittedly quite comforting, being able to read between the lines, knowing you see yourself as below him in status and likely feel grateful that someone like him would give you time and attention.

So to round the corner and see you smiling and laughing and talking to someone, the way his eyes casually travel over to see exactly who you’re facing, who you’re talking with so happily — he freezes mid-step, shoulders tensing up, smile dropping in an instant, the second he lays eyes on that godforsaken pair of big glasses and frizzy hair.

He recovers before you actually spot him, but you still notice tension in his voice and posture nonetheless — you can dismiss it as simply a rough day, maybe.

I wasn’t aware the two of you even knew each other. Small world, isn’t it?

You say you just happened to run into the guy while waiting. What a coincidence.

And Joker doesn’t linger either, he seems to recognize the awkward atmosphere, makes a quick exit with a nod and a farewell of assurance that he’ll see you both later, a statement that makes Goro bite his tongue.

It takes every ounce of self-control he has not to delve into endless questions on the exact circumstances and details of your relationship with him. He tries to tell himself he’s better off not knowing the details — anything you tell him will only keep him up all night, playing out visuals in his head. Even as it is, he knows that the image of you smiling like that will linger in his head for weeks on end, every second of remembrance filling his gut with a pit of bitter irritation.

It feels pathetic. It is pathetic, and he knows it. That only makes it that much worse, the sense of shame and embarrassment weighing down like an anchor in his chest, a burning, discomforting sensation.

But he refrains. Keeps the evening as normal as possible, tries to pretend as if he saw nothing, as if the interaction didn’t happen, he fights the urge and fights the urge and in the end, it comes spilling out anyway, so awkwardly and ill-timed that he has to resist the urge to slam his head into the wall right there out of self-directed frustration.

By the way, how exactly do you two know each other…?

It was a question he was better off not asking. You first need clarification of who he’s referring to — dammit, it’s been so long it wasn’t clear, and does that make it obvious that it’s been bothering him all evening…? — and even then, your answer is dodgy, avoidant, vague.

He doesn’t like the implications of that.

Why do you not want him to know? What specifically are you avoiding telling him? There’s only really two possibilities — either you’re fucking the guy and the truth would make that fact obvious, or you know, and the real story would explain exactly how.

And if you know, that might just mean you’re involved.

He’s not sure which possibility makes his stomach churn worse.

He has enough self-control to not make his suspicions too obvious, to let the matter go and not press further. It’s not until another conversation, another day, that he brings up the matter more directly, finding a convenient avenue to bring up the matter via a trail of conversation about his work.

By the way, I’ve been meaning to ask you… what are your feelings on the Phantom Thieves?

You give an answer that’s overall disapproving. Just complex enough to lend you a sense of intellectualism, but overall well-aligned with his own public statements.

A little too well, actually.

Like you’re just telling him what you think he wants to hear.

He grinds his teeth and beneath the table his fingers curl and dig into his thigh, but his pleasant smile doesn’t falter.

The suspicion that you’re not being fully transparent with him eats away at him. It keeps him awake all night, that night.

He doesn’t tell you about the second time he sees you together. That time, it’s by coincidence that you manage to cross paths, and he manages to go unnoticed — watching as you converse with the whole group of them together. You seem awfully comfortable with them. Like you’re used to being a part of this group. Like you've interacted with the lot of them many times before.

It makes his skin crawl. It makes his mind race with questions. It makes his thoughts drift to unpleasant things.

But he’s only finally vindicated within the metaverse itself. Once he actually, finally sees it with his own eyes, stalking behind the band of thieves, and lo and behold, there you are.

It feels so damn satisfying to be right, to have that vindication, that sort of I-knew-it rush of euphoria — and at the same time, the absolute rage is practically blinding, all-consuming. He’s left standing still, watching, blood running cold through his veins.

Look at you. Jumping all around, fighting shadows, complete with a fitting little outfit and all. It’s endearing, adorable even.

It makes him feel sick.

He’s known you longer. He’s done a lot for you in the past. And the thanks he gets from you is total betrayal. Allying yourself with the people working against him, knowingly, knowing how he feels about it, knowing it’s working against him directly — and you still have the audacity to see him regularly, to lie to him, to pretend like you’re on his side of things. You're actively deceiving him, and fully content with doing so.

The bitterness and spite that wells up in his chest is petulant, and he knows that. That makes the myriad of emotions that much more frustrating — to feel such unadulterated rage, yet that anger itself is embarrassing, makes him feel humiliated just to acknowledge his own feelings — and that intensifies the rage itself because it's your fault he feels that way, a self-perpetuating cycle of negativity.

And moreover, as childish as the thought feels, he can't help but succumb to the bitterness of the notion that you essentially have chosen them over him.

Is it merely ideological? Is that it? You just truly believe in their cause? Do you just like them more? Did he do something to lose favor with you? Did you never care for him that much at all? Is it circumstantial, they helped you and now you're helping them? And if that's it, why did it have to be the Phantom Thieves that helped you? Why didn't you go to him?

Why?

But all that restraint and self-control he exercises so perfectly externally takes a lot of effort. Internally, he gives in quite easily to letting his mind wander.

It’s so easy to cave to the fury, let himself be consumed by hateful thoughts and fantasies of vengeance, even the darkest and most petulant ones.

He’s always planned on killing them. He could make you watch. He knows he couldn't bring himself to kill you, but maybe he could make you think he's going to. Or he could threaten to turn you in, make you face the possibility of prison time. It would be satisfying, to see the fear etched onto your face. To see you grovel at his feet.

And if he gave you the choice — would you choose him, or to die with them? Would you betray them for him, if it meant being spared? Would you help him achieve his own goals, if it came down to it?

Maybe you'd say you’re sorry. Maybe you'd cry. He thinks he'd like that.

In fact, the more he thinks it through, the more it comes together, the more plausible it seems.

It will be easy. Just give him some time, and he'll ensure the circumstances work out perfectly to give him the opportunity to execute his fantasies down to the exact details.

And maybe if you beg for it, he can even forgive you, too.

[prentissluvr]

sammy brain rot hours:

feminism leaves my body when i look at sam winchester,, wanna be a good lil housewife for him (!!!) (like im their bobby yk? mostly doing research from the bunker, joining on hunts occassionally) welcome him home with a kiss and home cooked meals (idk how to cook proper food) and and and bombard him with love and force him to take a day’s break after each hunt ,, cuddle him , go with him on walks (god pls) ,, listen to his nerd talk

i deserve it 😭

thank u for listening to me yap

-mwuah 💋

GIRL YOU ARE SO TRUE FOR THIS AND I MEAN THAT !!! i love this for you actually, like this is facts of you to say and it's so valid and yeah! i think that's the real stuff. and like there's actually so so much merit to that kind of thing, like bro research is so hard imo HAHA so you'd be so strong for that. and yeah who's to say you can be a badass hunter when you want to be! but like bro i think it'd be nice not to have to do all that travel and hard physical labor of yk killing stuff and almost getting killed. and then yeah!! that means you're likely far more well rested than sammy when he gets home which means that you can take care of him hehehehe.

like him being greeted with a kiss from you after a long drive is just so beyond amazing for him, it's so comforting and relaxing and lord knows that he needs and deserves that. plus you have food from him that's not from a diner?? this must be the real heaven for him. like i also cannot cook for the life of me, but mans loves salad! you could just makes him a simple salad and he'd be so delighted because it has freshly cut apples, his favorite dressing, and non-soggy greens! like how amazing is that! genuinely you could makes the simplest of things (which is the only thing that i personally am capable of LOL) and he'd just be so delighted <3 like anything homemade is such a rarity for him and it's genuinely actually something really really special to him when you make him food and now i'm getting all soft and emotional about the fact that sam's barely had that sort of thing in his life. for some people hand made food is an indicator of home, and we all know that sam has never really had that. anyways crying because you just make the bunker somewhere infinitely better to come back to purely with your presence. on top of that, you make him salads and kiss him sweetly and you make him lay in bed and let him cuddle you to his heart's content. like truly you're such a comfort to him i can't :,)

and walks!! oh god i literally was thinking about how much sam would love love love to go on walks with his partner, genuinely. he loves the fresh air under a circumstance so domestic and normal and it's made a million times better by you. your hand in his makes him feel so calm and it gives him those little pieces of normalcy that he craves, no matter the fact that he'll always choose this life. you give him balance and something pure and good to come home to. and ahhhh yes the nerd talk <333 i'm making heart eyes right now for real. he feels so so so grateful for someone to talk to about all these little random facts of knowledge that he has floating around in his head! in instead of shutting him down or calling him a nerd (well, sometimes you do but it's done so lovingly that he doesn't care) you actually will listen, and even ask him follow up questions! he's just so excited to share things with you <33

argh i love him so bad and i thank you for sending this ask, i'm always so so happy to listen to your yapping hehe i love it <33 but you so got my thoughts flowing so ty for that hehe <33 love it sm fr <33

[paraliveimaginesblog]

Ryoga with red chrys., sweet pea, marigold, hydrangea, and purple hyacinth?

Ryoga Tosa:

🌻hydrangea: how often do they get into fights with their s/o? who usually apologizes first?

Not often. If he has a point to make he’ll make it, but he doesn’t let fights hang around because he’d rather admit wrong-doing than be given the cold-shoulder. He could normally pinpoint moments where he stepped over a line and needed to offer a genuine apology, but he wanted that same respect from you. He trusted that you wouldn’t just steamroll over his feelings even if he tried to keep the peace in his own way.

🌻marigold: how jealous do they get? how do they react when they get jealous?

Ryoga has to fight the jealousy he feels, biting his tongue and hoping he doesn’t have to chew it off to keep his cool. Controlling his anger matters greatly when it comes to improving himself as a person and he doesn’t want to give you a reason to run into another mans arms, but it’s hard when this person has more freedom to make moves on you. It’s easy to see his jealousy by the scowl on his face and the direct eye contact he makes with the person inspiring the jealous feelings inside him. It sends a clear message that they better back off or they’d be facing the consequences.

🌻purple hyacinth: how would they react if their s/o died?

Having two people he loved more than anything else in the world gone before he could show what he could offer, show that he was capable of growth and that he was turning his life around for the better, was almost too much for him to bare. He felt lost, his anger festering just beneath the surface as he wanted to lash out on even his allies, the fight to keep himself together harder than it had ever been. It’s like having a limb cut off, the phantom pain incurable, but he knew you’d be disappointed in him if he went back on his progress now. He convinced himself that he had to live for you, and that first step would be continuing his path of change and channeling his emotion into his music.

🌻red chrysanthemums: how long does it take for them to say ‘i love you’?

When he knows, he knows, but Ryoga struggled to say it the same moment he knew he felt it. He thought there was a delicate balance that most relationships required and he was clumsy at best, even when he was trying extra hard. Ryoga’s wary about revealing his position too soon, his actions speaking for him long before he managed to confess. It probably slipped out of him after about half a year together, admitting he already considered marriage as a possibility for your relationship if you would have him. After that embarrassing confession it’s easier to say those three little words as he had made it clear he considered you his ‘forever’ and you hadn’t run away yet.

🌻sweet pea: are they big on cuddling? what is their favorite position to cuddle their s/o in?

Ryoga enjoyed being close to you and the contact with you, especially at night when it was time to finally let your guard down and rest. You think it’s cute how he always managed to curl up close to you even if you started off on opposite sides of the bed, his body drawn to yours like a magnet. He always ran hot at night so you loved when he clung close on cold nights, wrapping yourself around him as much as you could and absorbing all the love that you could.

It depends on his feelings at the moment but he normally preferred being big spoon, which normally helped since he was broad-shouldered and large. He could take up a lot of space on the bed so he didn’t mind when you pressed yourself against him, arms enclosed around you in a protective gesture so any would-be attackers would have to get through him before laying a hand on you. Other nights he liked to just rest his head on your chest, falling asleep within moments as you ran your fingers through his hair and gave him the most restful sleep he’s ever had.  

[silentreigns]

"There have been 21 Japanese F1 drivers, and 18 Australian. Pretty sure DR is the only one from WA, which was not an easy feat either."

I know people are not trying to compare the struggles of a privileged white man who has ALWAYS had endless love and support from fans to Yuki, who had to balance learning entirely new cultures + enhancing his English skills while also navigating his rookie season, who ALWAYS has people accusing him of only being on the grid because of "Honda," not talent (yeah ... I'm sure PR has nothing to do with Daniel being back either, it's those beautiful performances he put on in 2022 🙄) even though Yuki has dragged the worst car on the grid into points and is performing consistently now (there's already some bias and racism in looking at what Yuki is doing atm and still insisting he's "only on the grid due to his nationality." And while we're on the topic of nationality ... let's do talk about the racism Yuki faces. Ricciardo screeches in the paddock after being outqualified by his teammate 11 races in a row, everybody loves it, it's passion, etc. Ricciardo calls his car last year, a capable midfield car, "a bag of dicks," everyone loves it. Ricciardo hypes himself up with "let's f*cling go," everyone loves it. Yuki has complaints about his car after this recent race, basically having the slowest car despite the team bringing an upgrade package, everybody describes him as "hot-headed." He needs to calm down. Anytime he expresses the least bit of emotion, he's too hot-headed and aggressive, he needs to be more complacent and docile. Any time he curses, be it out of frustration or just messing around, hes too aggressive, he shouldn't use that language. The guy cannot even express normal emotions without racist stereotypes leading him to labeled as hot-headed and aggressive, yet we routinely see white men on the grid, Daniel included, applauded for similar behaviors. So, no, I'm sorry, compared to Yuki, Daniel isn't some victim who had it so hard. Probably the ONLY similarity there was Daniel having to leave home to race, but he also didn't face contending with major language and culture differences like Yuki did. That was one of the most ridiculous arguments I have ever read. Sorry, I know you weren't the one arguing that, I agreed with everything in your post, that response just angered me.

Anon you really spilled and phrased everything perfectly. I feel like that person was intentionally being obtuse and trying to make Daniel a victim in this situation.

[gojosbf]

Hi...if you don't mind, can I ask something from Jujutsu Kaisen? What do you think are Gojo and Geto's greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic? Sorry if you've answered these questions before.....

oh i haven't answered these before and i would love to, now:

1. Gojo

• Strength : since he always embodies the goofy unserious persona it's so easy for people to overlook how great of a person he is overall. He is very patient, has clear goal and motivation, continues to have trust and hope in people and is infact very caring and kind and emotional. Yes!! Most of his actions are emotionally fuelled from grief or love or both (like swearing to create new generation of strong sorcerers, a world where he'll never fail anyone again, where nobody will be left alone again). He grew so much since hidden inventory and premature death arc, he went from the cocky naive strong boy to intuitive kind protective man. He was under no obligation to take in megumi, to save yuuta, to save yuuji but he did. He knows that the people in power are corrupt and he knows he is capable of wiping them out if he wanted, but he wants to do everything the right way, he is constantly making sure that the kids don't go through the things he did. Knowing that your birth disrupted the balance of the world and now you bear the burden of maintaining it and still having the courage to laugh it off. The term strongest boils down his humane nature so much it makes me sad.

• Weakness : ironically the fact that he is the strongest is his main weakness, he cannot relate to people, it's hard for him to understand why they give up so easily or why something bothers them so much, it's not that he doesn't try to, he does but there is a very big gap between normal sorcerers around him and gojo satoru himself. This gap is also the reason why he is lonely, he craves human intimacy which is why he is continuously trying to bond with others but after geto he never really confined in anyone, he knows he has to be be to solve his own problems and he's not allowed to show vulnerability, being the strongest means you cannot slip up, the weight of world is on your shoulders, you cannot cry, you cannot lose your composure, you cannot be human anymore. (236 proves it even when in panels gojo says "even those who adored me did not understand me" something along the lines). The day gojo satoru feels truly loved and the day he doesn't have to bear so much responsibility alone, he'll break. He is literally that line "if I don't laugh I will cry" (okay that went off tangent but yeah, emotions. are his biggest weakness)

2. Geto

• Strength & Weakness : this is going to sound real twisted but geto's strength is how he pretends to be fine when he is not. this is both his strength and weakness. He is such a complex character actually because his strength are also his weaknesses, both of them go so well together. He has very strong morals and once he is set on them he won't budge, both a blessing and a curse, because that is how he helped gojo become the gojo satoru he is today but at the same time due this strength of his once he stepped into dark he never came back. His love and trust for his friends, there's nothing that will ever beat geto's loyalty towards his friends, again this is his strength right? it's supposed to be a good thing but that is exactly what causes his death too and even in his death he still remained loyal to jujutsu high, infact even after his death he remained loyal to gojo. He is soft hearted towards the innocent, again something that's supposed to be a strength but because of this character trait of his the death of riko, haibara and the incident with nanako and mimiko had such a huge effect on him. He is self reliable to fault, he doesn't want to be a burden to his friends so he never shares what's bothering him. He wants to make this world a better place for his loved ones and he'd do anything for it, even become their enemy. To talk about geto by separating his strength and weaknesses would be doing him injustice, every good thing he had within himself was what caused his doom and every part of his soul had to carry so much grief and remorse. both his strengths and weaknesses stand together on a very blurry line.

what i love about their dynamic so much is trust and loyalty, even when they are both on opposing sides gojo could trust on geto to not kill panda and inumaki and geto knew gojo trusted him so he couldn't kill them. geto wanted to make a world where gojo wouldn't have to carry all the responsibility alone (his other part reason), gojo wanted to create a world where no one will ever feel left alone again. they're both so similar yet so different, both of them took kids under their care and swore to protect them, the difference was one one did not care about anyone else except the people he loved and the other was looking out for everyone especially the people he loved. even after everything that went down between them there was no sign of hate, not even close, they understood each other, they might've not agreed with each other's method but they understood. they were probably the only ones to ever understand each other fully, soul deep. it's right person, right time but ill fate and cruel life.

[lamentingocean]

>Sword Demon X Martial Art Prodigy Reader<

Warning: a bit of NSFW, violence, a bring up of sky and yeri, vent, fighting, and bit of an emotional impact, making out, philosophy shit and wisdom.

(Earn my rotmd degree into being the most diabolical simp, so I'm gonna add a bit of mongrang pervertness mueheh, but this is the final vote. BTW let me know what you guys want next◇)

____________________________________________

The sword demon,the man known to clean his blade to murdering multiple men that choose to be an enemy to him, his glare is indefinite and silently cunning to those that oppose and double cross his existence just by being a powerful martial arts capable of slicing the heads of even the martial arts prodigies. stunning but cold as an Arctic breeze. his sword is furthermore patternized as an art painting. the paint has its finest darkest colors to make a masterpiece enough to shoke even the professional painters of anicent china. and it's made into a canvas not only to be a haven full of strong emotional impact upon the demon's life but as a man with a deep dark pool of black water that is protracted as his soul. That painting is put into a room with nothing but a black ocean wall art just to take its theme into action into what he's really like.

cunningly mysterious, awfully powerful to sent warning signs to even the mad demon's flesh and bones, and strong enough to train a pervert like mongrang to be a highly beautiful man with a reputation of giving away peices of his charisma to women but also a formidable foe. he is such a man that even a person with a superhuman analytical ability can't get through. He's deep enough to find no meaning in life and just take time to bring it, meaning just to train and fight for what is right. His vibrant sorrows is what gets him a balance to earn his name. the sword demon.

a dangerous martial artist and part of the group of the four demons of this murim world.

Pervert Demon

Mad Demon

Sword Demon

And Poison Demon

you were born into a province. rich and wealthy into a heritage that will soon expand and continue under your own hands, eating with a gold fork and a gold spoon along with flakes of gold on your food to lather your own human system into the fabric of gold with your clothes even laced in gold. But it's a problem in this family. they are verbally abusive to their future successors and tried their worst in giving out that abuse to their own children as mental damage influence. they trained you before you can even stand on your own two feet as an infant. teaching you techniques and having to make you redo them over and over until it's perfected to their own satisfaction. It was torture, but practice makes perfect for the praise.

you receive praise, wealth, kindness, and a first time your parents could ever show love to their own children to cut off their own abusive attitude. but your mental state was bleeding from their kindness. but it was fake. The blade of their abuse slit your soul over and over until you are on the verge of tears every time you try to go out in public to be praising for your incredible swordsmanship, weapon proficiency, and reflexes. It sickened you to the core to be this strong but so weak to stand against people who choose to be parents just for the praise.

It's like reaching the aspect of dispair without showing a single emotion. they are the embodiment of dispair even though they are your parents. doesn't feeling like this break you into pieces and make you cry out in pain? No. your mental state is like armor. the more broken it is. the more it can block a hit so profound. it hurts, doesn't it? keeping it in hurts. keeping every strong emotion in your soul just to make people happy hurts.

It fucking hurts to be like this. to suffer under the pressure of your own family, be a controllable puppet to your parents, and fortunately kept into a lifestyle when vulgar words are supposedly normal. no. As a martial art prodigy that can take down 5 skilled fighters in one match is going to be strong for everyone. it's like keeping a bottle of water, and it's unopened just to grab every molecule of mineral and then those minerals are your true emotion. and then by each mineral collected. It becomes filled.

you looked at the legend of the sword demon, trying to know who he was. But you definitely knew who he was when you met him as a 10 year old. only to master the plum blossom technique to impress your parents until you saw him in the side of your eye. right in the wilderness when it's a big space in the wood to go all out into mastering that extravagantly gorgeous technique. glad they made a book about his greatness just enough that you can know him like the back of your hand. someone busted in and dropped a plate full of asian pastries.

It was the butler. and your hand reached a small piece of neatly carved paper. it's written in a female cursive. "Hello, Y/N! This is sky, and I wrote this to inform you that your parents issued an order to go travel across china and find more martial artists able to train you in your next path in life. so I recommend that you pack your bags and head out as soon as possible♡ your mother is a impatient women so she would expect your presence to be gone from here by the time she comes back from her association with the light faction Good luck and have fun with your travels♡

-SkyTsui" your hand flicked the note into the ground. suddenly angry at the news of traveling the world of anicent china just because your parents don't want to train you anymore. what a bunch of wealthy/ lazy fuck ups. but you did as you said as the controlled puppet that you are and packed up a lot of your stuff. even your sword at the bottom of your bed just in case to use for emergencies of factions, clans, or even mercenaries trying to raid the rich from their power and then kill them when the time is right. The weapon's name is called " Yuejue shu" Records of the Precious Swords. sturdy and sharp enough to break a kitchen knife. This can be used for self-defense, even if there are many rarities in the weapons in this world. Pack it up too.

And then boom, you are ready to go travel. Dropping down to the ceiling to mark your departure to leave this place for a while. it's a place that screams this: no matter if you're an emotional person who loves to express themselves in any way or a silent person that's going to keep it to themselves. it's a land full of judgemental/evil human beings that are always going to judge you for who you are. it's humanity. It's reality. people are continually miserable in trying to hurt other people to liven up their own insecurities. Even if you are a friend or you're being used, then you can't escape that. I find no meaning to life other than having a purpose to build within yourself so you can make meaning. we are evil. and if God is all powerful, then why didn't he eradicate the evil upon earth faster than he should. it's because he loves us. as evil. he loves us so much that even a mark upon humanity is going to drive us to the brink of dispair even when he isn't there to help us fix this fucked up world.

It's like letting your own creation die off and decay because of the aspect of humanity fucking up your own creation down into nothing but a capitalistic, dystopian, reality-faking, money hungry, government and supreme court controlled world. you reached down at your sword after that rush of thoughts for the future as in this is the world of anicent china. your wind gushed behind you as you flew like a bird because of your footwork. looking at all the ancient palaces. soon to be abandoned in the next 700 years.

(bro I wasn't able to finish this in time since I'm so damn busy with my online books outside of Tumblr, high school graduate, and college applications/ scholarships, so i can't finish this in time. It might be a part 2 but not right now.)

[n4stasia]

Sailor Moon: Girl Power Icon

Sailor Moon is a hugely influential anime that has shaped the way we see girl power shows today. In fact, it was Naoko Takeuchi's manga and its anime adaptation that introduced many people to this genre and anime in general. Shojo, as the genre can be easily considered one of the first feminist pop media. Our main heroine is a girl with many talents and magical powers. She must keep that in secret while juggling multiple social roles, meeting beauty standards, being kind and sweet, and on top of that, bravely saving the world while still finding time for her favorite hobbies. I enjoyed watching Sailor Moon as a kid, as well as in adulthood, easily relating to storylines and finding comfort in representation.

Relatable Queen

Usagi, the main character, is especially popular because she's so relatable. She's a bit clumsy and can be moody sometimes, which can get her into trouble. She's not perfect, and that's what makes her endearing to viewers. I'm not an anime psychiatrist (not like that's even a thing), but she resembles a lot of ADHD traits that are often missed in girls. There are a lot of examples of this, including her own description of herself, being a "daydreamer", having hard time focusing on homework, getting distracted while doing boring tasks, having a strong sense of justice (no wonder why she was a chosen warrior), and so on.

Tradition + Femininity

What makes Usagi special is that she combines traditional values with female strength and independence. Like most shojo heroines, she dreams of finding a loving partner and having a happy family. And of course, she has a special someone in her life. But Usagi doesn't rely on a man to save her. She can take care of herself and her loved ones.

Her friends are the same way - the world is saved by a group of strong, independent girls who don't need a man to help them. This gives a feminist twist to the classic fairy tale about eternal love; the princesses here are perfectly capable of taking care of themselves. Each Sailor Guardian has a complex and well-developed personality, with their own unique traumas, ambitions, desires, and struggles with self-identity. They also have rich backstories that reflect the real-life challenges faced by teenagers in Japan during that time, such as the breakdown of the family unit, the struggle to balance tradition with modernity, and the economic recession.

Perfectly Imperfect

The true genius of Sailor Moon isn't its subtle social commentary on that era. What makes Sailor Moon special is its deep understanding of the emotions that young girls experience, even the negative ones. The show normalizes imperfection, showing that it's okay to be different and that all the limitations society tries to impose are just as bad as the evil forces that once threatened the Moon Kingdom. The Sailor Guardians were waiting for peace on Earth so they could be reborn and live happily ever after. Peace seemed to arrive, but darkness never truly disappears - not just from the villains they fight, but also from the challenges of everyday life. The girls still have to fight for their lives, prove their worth, and maintain their independence. That's why the core message of Sailor Moon, although seemingly simple, is so important: being yourself is the greatest superpower you'll ever have.

[kunikinnie]

Part Two of a request from here

warnings: contains MAJOR manga spoilers! up to Ch 98

ranking: who falls in love easily?

featuring: the Decay of Angels

a/n: YES ALL OF THEM because... why not DISCLAIMER: This is just my far-from-expert opinion, so yes HAHA

MOST LIKELY

1. Sigma

The most "normal" out of all the members, Sigma has the capacity to understand human emotions (although he's still learning) and empathize with people (I think. I mean at least COMPARED to the other people here... not to mention the whole Sky Casino thing). Also, since he's a soul searcher who struggles to find his own meaning and purpose in life, coming across someone who may make him realize how wonderful life is may almost guarantee that he will fall for them.

2. Nikolai Gogol

This sanely insane clown of a man has been (and as of writing, still is) obsessed with Fyodor (whether in a platonic or romantic or whatever sense, up to you). I think it's likely he can feel the same way to some other person romantically, especially if that person has shown some interest in him (any sort of interest, imo). He's only number two for the same reason, though. Sure he may "love" quite intensely, but that's to whomever is at the number one spot - and boy does it take a lot for one to beat the current king.

MIDDLE GROUND

3. Fukuchi Ochi

He may be very ambitious, but he's not as gone off to the wind as the last two. But since he is an old man with the preoccupations of any other politically ambitious old man, romance is something not necessarily something that he's susceptible to, nor is it something out of the question. So if there's someone he can afford to fall for, then why not? He's pretty balanced in that sense, I think.

LEAST LIKELY

2. Bram Stoker

He's below Fukuchi simply because age has worn him down. Peak "old man who's tired of life." It's difficult to say what he was like in the past of certain but at least compared to the next person, he knows how to and can care for people he has some emotional attachment to (*coughs*Aya*coughs*) so I think he's still capable of that fuzzy feeling.

1. Fyodor Dostoyevsky

This man feels like he's God. Humans are foolish and easily manipulated, and I think Fyodor looks down on the general population. Aside from that, his arrogance and desire to realize his plans make emotional connections in general very difficult for him - or rather, he simply does not care. Even his allies are simply chess pieces to him. So for him to even have some sort of emotional curiosity with someone, that person must be exceptional in his eyes in some form or manner.

[impaladolan]

Home Alone - Grayson Dolan

summary: after a long week of work, y/n needs some sort of relaxation and relief. although, her outlook on relieving her frustrations isn’t what grayson had in mind...

warnings: tid bit fluffy, swearing, vibrator use, & smut

a/n: been in my unfinished drafts for a bit..

"Are you sure you don't want to tag along, baby?" Grayson longingly questioned, his brows crinkled and his lips almost forming a pout.

"I haven't been able to do laundry all week. God knows it won't get done unless I do it now." Y/N chuckles, balancing a full basket of freshly dried clothes on her hip, watching her lover wrap his fist around the front door's handle.

Every other weekend, at the Dolan residences, the two brothers, and sometimes their wives, would gather with some of their friends and watch their favorite football teams. And later on, they'd play board games or watch some movies. Normally, Y/N would be the one begging Grayson to hurry up and get ready to attend the biweekly event, except this time.

Y/N has different plans...

It had been a brutal week at work, her boss was currently taking out her "divorce emotions" on her employees and Y/N was getting the rougher end of it. She was relieved when it was finally the weekend and she could stress clean, calm her nerves in some sort of self efficient way and relax after a tough couple days.

She hadn't even had the thought of a sexual release, until she had dreamt multiple naughty scenarios just last night during her deep slumber. She couldn't exactly pinpoint what all she had dreamed, but she remembers waking up with a dripping arousal and a sore ache at her very center. And though her husband was laid right next to her, perfectly capable of satisfying her womanly needs, she decided using other resources would be a better fit.

Don't get her wrong, she loves being pleasured by the only man who knows exactly how to, but she felt embarrassed. She didn't want to come across as a sex-crazed women to Grayson, even though it would never make a difference to him.

They're married, for goodness sake.

"I can stay back and help out. We could even have our own little movie night if you wanted," He began, releasing his hand from the door and taking a few steps toward Y/N, whose lips turned into a cheesy smile as he drew closer to her.

"Just you and me," He took the basket filled with clothes from her hip and set it on the floor, intertwining his large hands with her smaller ones, eliciting a short laugh from Y/N. He brought her closer to his frontside, creating a ballroom dance-like formation and began shuffling around with her in his arms. Like an old married couple, they slowly danced around the room, him twirling her in his grasp while Y/N admirably gazed upon him.

Her cheeks were rosy with admiration, finding his little act of affection adorable. "You get easily distracted, huh?" Y/N grinned, resting her chin happily on his shoulder, his minuscule beard hairs tickling certain parts of her neck.

"Well, you looked too pretty over here by yourself," He softly explained against her ear. "And I wanted to dance around a room with a beautiful woman like you. So, I am." He lowered his hands beneath her and slew her into a romantic dip, planting a sweet kiss upon her lips. She returned one back, feeling her heart grow two sizes larger, much like the Grinch movie portrays, if anything.

"Grayson, I know how much you enjoy football, especially with the boys," She was only making excuses, but he had tempted her to just cuddle on the couch all day and watch plethoras of movies and munch on various snacks. But the low rattle in the depths her core was motioning her in a different way, and she just couldn't survive the rest of the day without fixing her little problem.

"Hmm, you're right. But when I get back, we're ordering take out and watching movies. Got it?" He chuckles, bringing the both of them back up into a standing position.

"M'hm, be safe." Y/N smiles, planting another kiss on her lover's lips before leaving his warmth. She waved goodbye to him as he left their abode, sweetly grinning as she went back to finishing up the laundry before the real reason she was staying home, would begin.

Though the couple's intimate relations seemed innocent and loving, they each had a different side to them, specifically in the bedroom.

The two never shied away from new experiences and would most certainly dabble into different areas of the "sex world," if you will. They, of course, had their preferences and different kinks, but Y/N seemed to be more open and freeing for that sort of stuff.

For the different occasions that they felt a bit more lustful and yearning for one another, they kept a locked trunk of knickknacks in their closet. You see, that's the one Grayson knows about, but Y/N keeps a smaller one, filled to the brim with all of her own toys, in a section of her closet that he never really pays attention to. If he had any idea that she kept self-pleasuring items for her own uses, he'd be absolutely ballistic.

Thankfully, he doesn't...

The moment Y/N threw the last bits of dirty laundry left, into the washer, she practically sprinted to their shared bedroom. After rummaging through the trunk filled with "accessories," she found a nice, pretty pink vibrator to do the trick, as well as a black silk blindfold to shield her own eyes. She was already rid of her clothes and sprawled across the wide bed in an instance, tying the piece of cloth over her eyes. 

Though, unbeknownst to Y/N, Grayson was already on his way back home. As soon as he had pulled into his brother's driveway, they had called to cancel— a certain emergency about something Grayson didn't really pay attention to listen to. He was thrilled that he didn't have to leave Y/N at home, all by herself to do chores all day. And luckily, their houses weren't too far apart from each other, so Grayson was back home within fifteen minutes of leaving it.

He didn't feel the need to text Y/N, she was probably busy anyway and possibly wouldn't respond. He figured she would hear the garage door open and expect that he was already home.

Little does he know...

As soon as he was parked and out of his vehicle, Grayson was trudging down stairs to the laundry room, in search of Y/N. He was surprised that she wasn't there, but he figured she might just be folding on the couch, trying to get ahead on one of the TV series the two were drawn into.

Grayson chuckles as he makes his way back upstairs, though his brows curtly furrow, his ears almost perking at the muffled sounds coming from the hallway.

Their shared room, to be precise.

With a pondering look upon his face, he kicks off his shoes and makes his way towards his bedroom, quietly twisting the door handle and pushing it inward. He opens the door wide enough to secretly look inside, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness that enveloped the entire expanse. The noises he had heard only seconds ago were more prominent, and his eyes had fallen on the object creating the aroused sounds;

Y/N.

She was laid out on their bed, legs wide open and shaking while her hands were constantly pressuring a fucking sex toy against her soaked pussy. Grayson froze, pure anger washing over him and turning his face a turbulent shade of red, washing away his pleasant mood. He almost stormed in there, ready to rip the stupid machine away from her hands and show her what a real orgasm feels like.

But he somehow contained himself, and instead, watched the scene play out in front of his very own eyes, vexation spilling from his entire countenance.

Y/N didn't hear the garage door open and close, or even the beep of Grayson's truck when he locked it.  She hadn't even heard his feet stomping up and down the stairs, or his lingering chuckles. She was so caught up in how she was feeling.

The artificial vibrations that buzzed upon her core made the world around her so euphoric and heavenly. She'd brush the toy upon her clit, forcing her entire body shake with deep pleasure and a soft moan to emit from her mouth. It felt so nice, and she was so close to the brink of releasing.

She was already feeling better, and naughty. If Grayson were to find her this way, masturbating  freely in the open and satisfying herself, she would never live to see another day. But she didn't care at this point, she just wanted to finally cum.

And she was extremely close.

Her hips began to buckle, while her backside rose from the bed and her free hand twisted at the sheets beneath her. "Mm- just a little more—" Her entire core was pulsating, so fucking close to just letting go.

So close..

"Don't fucking cum yet, slut." Grayson's voice boomed throughout the room, making Y/N's movements freeze in terror and shock. Before she could think of some sort of explanation or reasoning as to what she's doing, her blindfold is ripped from her eyes, while the vibrator that was once nuzzled up on her pussy, was taken away as well. Now, she felt so empty and wanting, edged to an almost release.

"Jesus- You're fucking dripping, for fucksake." His tone was harsh, and Y/N felt like crying. She held onto her tears as she watched him examine the drenched vibrator, still buzzing in his hands. Out of the loss of contact, she began to whine, squeezing her thighs together to create at least a little bit of friction.

"Grayson, please—" She began to huff, but her shuttering voice was interrupted by the aggravated man pacing in front of her.

"I don't think I fucking asked you to talk, did I?" He glared at her, though just the sight of Y/N's exposed body made him shudder with a tinge of want.

Against his wishes, Y/N continued her whines, her breathing still ragged and finally her own hand traveling down to her soaked heat. She didn't care if she'd be in more trouble, she just needed to unravel the knot inside her, whether she'd pay for that mistake later or if not.

She didn't get far, because Grayson caught her wrist before it made it all the way down to her center, and brought it up to the headboard. He wrapped a leather strip around both of her wrists, mumbling incoherent spews of anger, doing the same with her ankles against the bedposts.

"I-I, I thought you were gonna watch football.." She began, but a low growl sounded from Grayson, and the blindfold was placed back over her eyes, while a different type of cloth was shoved in her mouth. Y/N feels the numbing slap across her thigh before hearing the connection's sound, an exasperated scream muffling out of her filled mouth.

"I'd stop talking if I were you. Unless you want to be choked by Daddy’s fucking cock, darling." His voice rattled her insides, and she dared not to make another sound, already dug far too deep in a hole anyway. "Get ready princess, m'gonna edge the fuck out of you. Maybe then, you'll remember to ask me for permission to use your fucking toys." His voice soon faded from her ears as a higher vibration than before was nudged right up against her swollen clit, making her figure convulse in imploding pleasure.

It took an entire hour for Grayson to edge Y/N twelve fucking times. She was a mess, sweat droplets dotting her hairline while her pussy remained in slippery shambles. He didn't say a word, and Y/N held her tongue from shouting profanities after the several losses of contact. She hadn't came yet, but if she didn't soon— she would find a way to get out of her restraints and finish off what she had started herself.

It had been several minutes since Grayson had pulled her to the brink of an orgasm, and she was starting to think that he'd never come back. She had heard the sound of a zipper earlier, and she couldn't tell if he was doing something to ease his own pain while she laid there, so high strung and breathless. She was about to call out his name, but the warmth of his tongue wrapped around her bundle of nerves and she let out an exasperated sigh, pulling on the cuffs tied around her wrists.

He slipped his tongue in skillful motions, his hands pushing up underneath her thighs as he lapped up her liquids. Y/N was so sensitive to touch, anything that remotely stroked her could heighten her arousal and make her lust for more.

Within seconds, her hips were shaking and her back arched above the mattress, her toes curling under the pressure. And his voice finally sang the heavenly words she had been waiting for the entire time;

"Cum, princess."

Y/N released all over his lips, a high-pitched scream sounding from her mouth as she finally unravels, her legs bucking against their restraints. She spits out the cloth from her mouth and heavily breathes, murmuring praises to the man between her legs.

"I'm sorry, Grayson."

a/n: did this completely suck? i haven’t really written in third person in awhile, so i need honest opinions..

[apixrl]

IT'S YOU.

hanta sero x fem!reader

WARNING(S): slight angst. mostly arguing / tension but fluff towards the end.

word count: 5.3k

song: it's you // gavriel

note(s): if u stan him ur immediately just so hot and sexc and if not ur just really stinky sorry not sorry

italian translation - translator !!

The heavy pouring rain waged war against your once dry and stylish jacket. The piece of clothing now resorted to an added weight as you strode forth to reach your apartment complex. Luckily you were only a street away, your hurried walk turning into a legitimate jog when the storeyed building came into sight. It was Friday night, meaning the day you worked overtime for the sake of earning a little extra as well as filling in for a coworker. Most of the day the weather had been miserable, the sky maintaining a mundane and drilling grey cloudy sketch that slowly collected into rain. Luckily your morning walk to work hadn't been affected by the downfall but the weather had chosen to stick around for your walk home.

Your jacket glued itself to your frame as its capability to keep you dry fleetly decreased, the hoodie underneath beginning to dampen ever so faintly too. Your pants were already taken to the rain, answering its call by absorbing the water into the fabric and making them exceptionally uncomfortable to wear. The pair of shoes on your feet struggled to bind together as they countlessly stepped in puddle after puddle, wearing and tearing with every step you took.

Cars passed by, tires causing gushes of water to hit the pavement. The street lamps did nothing to show your presence as they sped by, your body growing damper from the droplets of water hitting you. You briefly scolded the inconsiderate drivers in your head, eyes glancing ahead to meet an approaching individual. They were most likely a neighbour but given the darkness surrounding you weren't entirely sure, ultimately deciding to keep your head down and not draw attention to yourself.

In truth, this wasn't the only reason.

During the last week and a half, your want to socialise was relatively low, finding a lot of your spare time spent at home and in your own company. The separation from society was healthy for your recently plagued mind, spending afternoons finding all kinds of homely leisure to pass the hours by. It felt much more wholesome and enjoyable to endeavour in a story from your bookshelf or writing poetry in your journal straight from the heart rather than sitting aimlessly on your phone. Simply scrolling through social media to bore the day away.

Why the sudden stray from society to your own little world? Well... sometimes having a popular Pro Hero as a boyfriend came with its cons. Especially when hardships came between. As of the Tuesday approaching, it would be your ten-month anniversary with your partner - Hanta. Or what he was better known as; Taping Hero: Cellophane.

Yours and his meet was rather mundane truth be told. What started as a journey to purchase a recently released volume of one of Hanta's favourite manga comics took a drastic turn and became something much more meaningful. He caught you grabbing the final copy available, smoothly swooping in to attempt to charm you into giving him the comic (the ravenette had been to about five stores before that during patrol - a rather lousy thing to do but he justified his actions with lack of spare time). However, he walked out with a date two nights later instead, finding himself be moved by your own charms and attraction that Hanta urged himself to ask and not miss the chance.

From there, things were taken slow. His social status was shared pretty quickly, faster than Hanta felt comfortable with - liking the idea of you liking him for who he was over his fame and wealth. It didn't affect your perspective of the ravenette, since you had already fallen for him before such information could be told. It took a month before you officially became boyfriend and girlfriend, and life couldn't have been better for the pair of you. For the most part, your relationship was perfectly stable and as healthy as you could make it. But unfortunately, all good things must come with a cost.

See, one thing you were to learn with growing closer to Hanta was he kept his personal life extremely separate from his heroic persona. Such a statement was made very clear before you brought your relationship to the next level since the ravenette requested that if you were to become lovers that he would want it to remain private. So he could feel he had a somewhat normal life outside of his duties as a hero. Whilst becoming a Pro was his dream and the man loved his job, Hanta was also a sucker for peace and quiet too. Having that metaphorical and literal balance in his life granted him inner peace, and as his partner, you respected that.

At least at first, since you didn't think you would reach ten months together and still be hiding behind sunglasses whenever the pair of you wanted to see a movie.

You couldn't lie, it was endearingly sweet Hanta felt that way, partly anyway. The fact he cherished your love and relationship so close to his heart that it was only shared between you two. But your irrationality couldn't help but make you wonder how in a concerning way, Hanta's desire to keep you from his greatest achievement in life (becoming a top ten pro) almost felt like he was hiding you... like he didn't want you a part of it. And once that thought struck you as the ravenette rested peacefully beside you one night, it didn't shy away anytime soon. Given the fact you had spoken briefly about making yourselves public in the past with little to no issue, you didn't think you would cause harm by bringing it up again. But it seemed your choice of when to bring it up was poor, as it most certainly did not run smoothly between you.

Something about his day had irritated Hanta, and so you pinning such focus on the subject seemed to pass him over his limit. There were a few snaps here and there, which you didn't necessarily appreciate, and Hanta's lack of enthusiasm and care for your request made you all the more upset. So weighted emotions matched with the evident disagreement surely lead to Hanta storming out of your apartment with such a slam to the door you wouldn't have expressed shock if your neighbour's stepped out in the hall to see the chaos ensuing.

That was nine days ago, and so far neither of you had seen nor spoken to the other. You'd made attempts to contact him since then, attempts you knew before you tried would come out unsuccessful. But from observation, Hanta was surprisingly a complete mess when it came to emotions based on negativity. Whenever the ravenette grew angry or agitated he became a closed book, so hard for you to read that the only thing you learned that worked was to give him space. To let him get through his upset alone since he never seemed to allow for outer help and comfort to assist. Which you despised because you wanted to help him through his troubles. To be there as the big spoon or to be the shoulder to cry on. But stupid male pride got in the way, Hanta building a wall so high and thick between him, his emotions and you that truth be told you had no idea how to push through.

So you resorted to letting him get over it in his own time, knowing deep down he would come around eventually. It wasn't the first quarrel you'd had and hopefully not the worst, and you knew this was Hanta's way of dealing with it. Whilst you had been willing to wait it out, you placed that thought in your head thinking it to be only two or three days before Hanta made some sort of effort.

But it was nine. And that was beginning to concern you greatly.

You finally reached the stairs leading up to your apartment building, the relief flowing through your system so freeing and wonderous. All that was left was to type in the passcode by the main doors and you would be merrily under shelter, able to kick off your trainers and slip into some comfy sweats. Perhaps even make yourself a warm cup of cocoa and watch an episode of a show you needed to catch up on before the sweet release of sleep. Or so you thought it was going to go.

Twenty minutes later and your thumb grazed lightly over your phone's home screen, imaginatively stroking the black hair of a certain boy you loved dear as he smiled cross-eyed back at you. The photo was taken when Hanta took you ice skating in the countryside during the winter which previously passed. He discovered a secluded location hiding a spacious lake that had been glazed with thick, sturdy ice. After numerous times of losing your balance, Hanta deemed it amusing to take a photo with you as you sat on your backside in defeat. And whilst it did humiliate you, you adored Hanta's goofy looking face in the photo. Hence why it was your background.

You'd found yourself staring at the photo the night prior too, contemplating whether to try to call again or not. What if something was wrong? What if Hanta was injured and somewhere under repair at one of the numerous hospitals in the city? God... what if the doofus finally slung himself across the city as crazily as that Western hero he never shut up about and fell to his death? And your setback from social media was the reason you hadn't found out yet? See! This was a reason why you wanted to go public! At least in an emergency, somebody would know who to contact!

Your brows crinkled at that final thought, what began as concern moving back a step to annoyance and you settled on tossing your phone behind you on your bed in defeat. Proceeding to stand upright, you tugged the oversized hoodie (Hanta's hoodie not to mention) on your person and wandered through the rooms of your apartment to your kitchen. Where the bubbling of your kettle boiling water filtered your ears. The low hum calmed you as you leaned against the counter in thought, arms crossed over your chest and your eyes focused deeply beyond the wooden flooring.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

The noise went unheard at first, so occupied in your head you mistook the sound for the kettle boiling. But when the triple trill sounded again, it dawned on you that that was most certainly not how a kettle was supposed to sound. Snapping out of your focus, your head lifted to the kettle before it scanned the room around you. Nothing seemed different at all, and nothing inside your apartment had a reason to make such a sound.

Unless you had rats... then maybe that would make sense.

Please don't be rats.

Having no initial success, you blankly went back to your thoughtful state - the kettle finally boiling. Permitting you to fill the lavender painted mug that waited impatiently on the side, four heaped teaspoons of cocoa powder begging for hydration inside. Now actually having something to do you hoisted yourself off of the counter, stepping to the one opposite to do the task at hand. But then just as you were going to pour the heated water...

Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap!

This time it was more rushed and heightened, holding a lack of patience to a certain extent. It was there you finally trailed your eyes left, right and centre, your E/C irises landing on the french doors past your sofa which lead to your balcony. Doing as much as possible to downplay your panic by putting on a brave face, you manoeuvred from your perch in the kitchen and headed for the doors to glance outside. Thankfully the light on the balcony was switched on, giving you a glimpse of silhouettes to the arrangement of the outdoor area. At first, nothing seemed different at all. Just the usual setting your balcony always had. A few potted plants and a small sakura blossom which you'd been growing from the seed, as well as a glass table and four chairs. Not to mention the closed up umbrella and pole reaching for the stars above too. But looking over your observations, something went amiss. Since when did you have five chairs?

Squinting your eyes in a struggle to focus better, they were only set to widen as it hit you what you could see. There, perched on your balcony in a squatting position was a person... balancing perfectly on the thin pole as their head leaned forwards to occasionally peer inside the glass doors. It took a second or two for you to figure out what was going on. But the moment you recalled the fact you had a boyfriend with the ability to swing from rooftop to rooftop, your heart both plummeted to your feet and leapt to the heavens above simultaneously.

After realising what was happening, you moved to the lock of the glass doors and grabbed hold. That movement seemed to indicate shifting on the exterior because the person on the other side stood upright and casually stepped off the railing as though it were a stair. You swallowed thickly, clamping down on the inside of your cheek in worry that you could not see his face. Unfortunate for your nerves since at least then you could gain some form of presumption to what his expression read. So walking in blind, you unlocked the door and jiggled it open, the glass door sliding to the side easily. Quickly did the silent walls of your apartment be filled to the brim with the heavy downpour of rain and distant car horns in the distance. As well as the overhanging state of tension in the air as your eyes trailed up the slender frame of your visitor and meeting the ebony eyes you'd been missing for far too long now.

"What... what are you doing here?" You uttered out after a long twenty seconds passed. Upon opening the door no words were said, only the longing gaze of two conflicted lovers. Hanta stood before you with a discouraged expression, lips tightly pursed together with no catchphrase toothy grin to show. He was donning his hero costume, though his helmet appeared to be missing for reasons you didn't know why. But it didn't help Hanta one bit since his black locks were laced with the heavy downpour from above. You imagined his hero costume was drenched as well, damp spandex sounding all too discomforting in your head as you used it as a focus to ease the nerves you felt to the sudden visit.

"Hey," Hanta finally said after what felt like a millennium. What were his usual cheerful tones came out low and unsure, like the ravenette hadn't come prepared and was relying on other factors to push himself forward. With sunken brows and a clear of his throat, Hanta continued as he lifted his eyes to meet yours. "Can I come in?"

"Oh... right, sure," You stated blankly and stepped back for him to do so. At first, you wanted to ask him why he decided to come to your balcony of all things, but the look in his eyes had convinced you to wait for that chance. There was just something about those gorgeous orbs of ebony you couldn't say no to - conflict or not. Luckily your apartment flooring was hard, meaning any water from Hanta's shoes (or soles as his costume didn't use shoes) could be mopped up and dealt with later. Not that you were thinking about that at all. Your mind was too focused on processing what was going on.

"I was in the neighbourhood and you know that my tape is crap in rain so... I didn't know where else to crash," Hanta started once inside your apartment. He nervously laughed as though to ease inner feelings, hands meeting his hips in a lost attempt to make conversation. It was mainly due to the fact you hadn't properly greeted him, sort of dawdling between him and the sofa. You looked Hanta up and down and sighed, seeing how soaked he was.

"Here... slip this on," You lifted your hands over your head to tug the hoodie off, holding it out for Hanta to take. It was his anyway, and it would be a lie to say you weren't wearing it for his scent. Underneath the hoodie, you donned a simple black tank top you tended to wear during your morning jogs or times of exercise. The ravenette took it reluctantly, initiating you to head for your bedroom. "I'll go grab you some pants too. And a towel for your hair,"

"Oh... okay then," Hanta was genuinely astonished by the hospitality, watching you disappear down the hall. As you grabbed the aforementioned items, he began to remove the top half of his hero costume. It was true that Hanta loved his hero costume very much but when it came to the rain he wanted nothing more than to change the design completely. The spandex soaked up the rain and it took hours to drip out, not only dampening him but also multiplying its weight much more than double its usual. With his tape dispenser shoulder pads placed on the floor, Hanta stripped himself of his top half. Sighing when he discovered the rain had seeped through and dampened his skin. Luckily you entered the room shortly after, carrying some grey sweats of Hanta's and a freshly cleaned towel.

"So... is there any other reason you decided to scare the crap out of me on my balcony?" You questioned flatly, a hand on your hip as you held the towel out for Hanta, placing the sweats on the sofa cushion next to him. He mumbled a quick thanks, promptly starting to dry his upper half.

"Well yeah," The ravenette stopped momentarily to glance your way, ebony eyes finding you back at the countertop in the kitchen where you resumed the task of making cocoa. Hanta quickly expressed a sigh. "W-We gotta talk,"

"About?" You asked innocently, though you were fully aware of what was being implied. Chewing the inside of your cheek as you did your best not to make eye contact, Hanta furrowed his brows at you.

"I think you know,"

"Well, are we starting afresh or picking up where we left off? The moment you decided to storm out of here and slam the door shut?" You spoke in a passive-aggressive manner because truth be told, you didn't appreciate Hanta's way of handling your last discussion at all. So you were certainly planning on letting him know. Speaking of which, Hanta was now scrubbing his raven locks dry as his eyes closed in response. Almost like he expected you to react in such a manner. Though he refrained from biting back, knowing that would only make it worse. Not his aim for visiting.

"Starting afresh,"

"Okay then," Was all you said, stirring your spoon and tapping it quite obnoxiously on the side of the mug before dropping it into the kitchen sink. Then you moved to the fridge to grab yourself some squirty cream. The can practically empty, it reminded you how badly you needed to go grocery shopping the next day. As for a reply, from across the room, you could only see the essence of hesitance. Either from Hanta figuring where to go from that or ultimate regret for even coming. Your bets were on both.

"Look Y/N -," The ravenette began, relatively quick to dry the rest of himself off and to put on the remaining clothes. Just as he was prepared to skirt over to your side, his actions ceased upon seeing you setting yourself down on the armchair opposite. Hanta had a moment where he didn't move, unsure what to do before he resorted to sitting down on the sofa. Feeling it the only safe thing to do. "I don't want problems between us. It's the last thing I want, okay?"

"I um... okay," You said, fingertips tapping lightly against the ceramic mug filled to the brim with whipped cream and cocoa. Hanta met your gaze for a split second, hands proceeding to fiddle with the other much more prominently.

"But... I want you to know that I've been thinking about it and well... I guess if it'll make you happy, I'm willing to do it and go public," Hanta spoke through a sigh. Peculiar, because a week ago you would have probably broken into a bright smile and jumped straight into the ravenette's arms then and there. Yet, you remained in your seat and mouthed a small oh of... disappointment was it? Whilst you weren't certain what it was, it most definitely felt like that. Which was odd because the words Hanta had just uttered were the ones you had been waiting to hear for months now.

Funnily enough, it didn't take you long to figure out why. Because throughout the previous week and the lack of contact, that's exactly what had been the route of the problem. The way Hanta treated you during your last interaction and the lack of communication mixed with it. It wasn't the original issue anymore. Of course, you still wanted that. But you additionally craved a sense of closure for how you were treated.

"Hanta I...," Hanta's brows crinkled together in a frown, not shy to display his confusion to your hesitant tones.

"What? What is it? T-That's what you want right?" He replied.

"Yes, it's what I want. But that's not the issue anymore,"

"What do you mean? I'm not following...," His response made you scoff. Not exactly great for the situation at hand. You remained silent for a little bit longer, scratching the side of your head as you sat upright to elaborate.

"Hanta... you haven't texted or called me in over a week. You walked out of here after a fight and practically went radio silent!" Was your protest, watching as Hanta fell back against the sofa. Unbeknownst to you, there was another reason he did this. An inner conflict he had yet to unveil. A prolonged silence ensued as if Hanta was trying to find the correct words to say.

"Because I needed space Y/N... time to think!"

"Yeah well we both did... but even calling just to say that would have been reassuring," You weren't finished despite trailing off, Hanta seeming to notice by the way your lips were faintly parted. "I know you have a busy schedule but... but...," The thought entered your mind for a split moment, doing much more damage than intended.

"But what?"

"It doesn't matter. I-it's stupid," You tried to brush it off, suppressing the thought further down into your system so it wouldn't win you over. Hanta didn't seem to like that though, his head tilting your way with his eyes boring into your own. He could tell when something was bothering you, just from your body language.

"No. Tell me,"

"You're not losing interest in me, are you?" It sounded ridiculous the moment you uttered the words, and it sounded even more ridiculous as Hanta's hands met the bridge of his nose in a heavy sigh. Quickly causing you to further your point. "I-I just thought that you not wanting to go public and being 'busy' was a nice way of saying -,"

"Don't even finish that sentence,"

"Sorry," The silence lingering between you both drowned out your voice, to which you looked down at your hands with a sigh. The ravenette sat upright rather abruptly, shifting onto his feet and coursing a hand through his hair. There was a clashing frown on his face as he reflected on the words he just heard.

"I can't believe you would even think that... that I'm growing tired of you!" Hanta called out in disbelief, near offended by the accusation. His body twisted to face you, eyeing you down for some sort of explanation or justification to what you said.

"It's hard not to when you're giving off all these... these signs!" That was your best response. Though you were set to be cut off by another sharp sigh from Hanta. One of many expressed that rainy night. You watched as he walked on over to the glass doors he entered moments earlier, observing the rain slashing harshly against the clear surface. It had grown even heavier since his entry, the back of his mind relieved to be out of the dangerous weather and inside closed doors. He didn't ponder on it long though, returning to the situation at hand and leaving the indistinct 'pitter-patter' of the rain behind him.

"Y/N have you ever thought for a single moment why I've kept you secret for so long?"

"You said you liked your private life to be away from your hero one... a-and I get that!" You replied urgently. "I'm okay with all the publicity and the social media responses and -," As though he expected that answer, Hanta interrupted you with a near saddened laugh. It caused you to frown and glare his way, about to raise your voice if not for his own voice filling the apartment.

"You know my job isn't just walking around being a celebrity, right?" Hanta glanced back at you. "I'm a hero for crying out loud! I protect people from danger! People like you!" The ravenette pressed a closed fist against the glass pane of the door, forehead inches away from the surface since Hanta shifted most of his weight onto it. You tilted your head, frowning.

"I know that but -,"

"But do you?" Hanta's tone came off harsher than intended to emphasise his point. But he was quick to abandon it, clicking his tongue in defeat to a battle in his head when he realised he had to explain his case. He'd been reluctant to say anything about his activities in the last week since technically not even the press knew, but lying wasn't going to get Hanta and you anywhere. So he surrendered to the urge and spoke. "Listen, the reason I didn't message you this week is that I've been working non-stop over some drug trades going on. One's that have been going on for a while underground and ones that have gotten good people killed. I haven't had the time to focus on us even though our fight has been in my head all week and I've been shitting myself over talking about it because I don't want to lose you! I couldn't imagine life without you, Y/N and I feel like an ass for treating you how I did last time we spoke! But I haven't been able to tell you that because access to my phone has been slim, and I couldn't-,"

"Hanta?" You stood up gingerly, only speaking up due to the change of Hanta's aura. He had started curt and sharp but slowly tumbled into a more emotional demeanour. The more personal his small speech grew the more it started to affect him, probably the impact of his own thoughts taking their toll. There was even a voice crack at some point, one you'd never heard before. Hanta took a deep breath, bracing himself to speak again.

"It sounds like a lame excuse but it's the truth. I didn't want to say it. But I can't lie to you," He continued. "It's cases like this that have kept me from wanting to go public. B-Because if those people were to figure out who you are because of me...," There was a stifled shake of a breath, Hanta's voice quietening in fear just at the thought. "I wouldn't be able to forgive myself,"

You were speechless. So speechless you weren't even mad anymore. He was finally... finally being vulnerable with you and that seemed to be enough for you to erase all your grudges. Sure, work wasn't an excuse for everything. But in a circumstance like this one - with the job that Hanta lead, you could understand his reasons and in spite of your worry you knew the rules. No mobiles on operations. And finally, he was confiding to you about why he struggled with the thought of announcing your relationship. So in a very reluctant manoeuvre, you plucked up the courage to walk up behind him and wrap your arms around Hanta in a sorrowful hug. Hanta tensed up at first, breath running short, but he didn't push you away. A hopeful sign.

"I'm sorry for making it such a big deal when you had other things to think about," You said, pressing your lips to the back of his shoulder blade and giving the surface a peck. You remained there for a good few, adamant seconds before retracting. "And I'm sorry for never looking at it that way... or considering your feelings on the matter,"

"Y/n it's fine... just...," Hanta seized the opportunity to turn around to face you, running a hand through his ebony locks with one hand as his other slithered around you to return the hug. "I'm sorry I made you doubt me... I feel like shit about it and it wasn't my intention at all,"

"No! No! Don't apologise. It's okay, " You brought a hand to fiddle with the string of his hoodie. As much as it wasn't what you wanted, you had to see Hanta's perspective and understand his feelings too. This was a two-person relationship after all and had you known his feelings ran that deep, you wouldn't have pressed the matter as much as you had. "Look, we don't have to announce anything to anyone okay? If it makes you comfortable and happy then I'm willing to remain a mystery a little longer,"

That returned some colour to his face, almost like Hanta feared you would oppose him even still and the situation would grow for the worse. With a small sigh of relief, he finally allowed a smile to press to his lips. A smile you knew all too well and had missed for a while now.

"Thank you for understanding," Hanta exhaled, pausing as his eyes hovered onto you with an ounce of playful intent. "And I guess we could be a little bit less discreet when we go to the cinema together," You smiled faintly, finally satisfied with the decision you had come up with. Better yet, a compromise. The very thing you had wanted to start with... clearly your concluding thoughts had been premature.

"Thank you... it means a lot,"

"Yeah... I love you," Hanta spoke gently, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

"I love you too," You stood on your tiptoes to lightly peck his lips, Hanta humming softly in approval as he returned the gesture. After a few seconds, you pulled back though, feeling a smile on your face as you did. It was enjoyable to kiss his lips again, another thing you had missed greatly in your week-long deprivation of your boyfriend.

"So, how does some hot cocoa sound? I can imagine you were sat on the balcony for a pretty long time," You pulled away from the hug, but kept hold of Hanta's wrist as you tugged him along with you. Hanta shook a fist in grateful triumph, sighing out in bliss at the offer.

"Oh, I thought you'd never ask! Hot cocoa sounds amazing," He smiled, pausing temporarily before adding on. "But are cuddles on the table too?" You glanced back at him, half expecting the request. But there was no way you were going to say no. You shook your head in amusement before answering.

"I think we're both in desperate need of cuddles, so I think so. Yes,"

"Amen to that,"

[thebabblingbrookenook]

I love this one so much, Eleanor. You know I love a good Anthony/Sophie interaction. I may or may not be using all these little fics you're dropping as the groundwork for another fic I'm highly anticipating from you with the two of them. 😘

The emotions and character traits/flaws in this are so realistic and grounded. It makes me feel very connected to them as people because it's just so normal. The scene with all of them around the dinner table in particular. You captured the chaos of a big family, the never-ending noise. We all live our lives selfishly to some extent, and that's what is happening here. Everyone is focused inward, which is okay. We all have needs, and we are allowed to ask for them to be met, but there are certain people that always seem to find themselves as the providers to those needs, and it can be exhausting. You've done a beautiful job of expressing that through Anthony here. The way he sits silently, listening and cataloging every word being spoken, translating each one to reveal what is being asked of him, required of him. The mental juggling he's doing to balance his workload while attempting to remain poised and capable... He believes he has to hold it all together, solve every problem, know no failure, because if he can't, then what use is he to them? He fears that he himself would not be enough to warrant their love if he couldn't provide all of these things for them. Which, of course, isn’t true. You've even described what is physically happening with his body as more and more gets stacked on his shoulders. It paints a very vivid image. I don't think anyone intends to overwhelm him, he's just very good at his job. They look to him as a leader because he leads. They have trust and faith in him. At times, I'm sure that is hard for him to see because it is subtextual.

I adore that you have also provided small glimpses into everyone else's stresses too. It humanizes them all. It makes it harder for a reader to view them as spoiled, inconsiderate, or uncaring to Anthony's growing pressure. The one I'd like to highlight most is Colin. At first, I wanted to be annoyed with him, but then I looked closer. He came to his older brother, WITHOUT his wife, to essentially humble himself enough to ask for a handout. He still hasn't shed enough of his pride to flat-out ask, but he's working on it. Anthony is a direct person, I think he would appreciate Colin pulling him aside and asking him for advice, money, or even help forming a plan to make it all happen. To help his little brother find a way to feel as if he can provide for his wife and children. To help his little brother feel like the man they are all aiming to be - Edmund. Anyway, I just really appreciated that little addition.

While everyone else is currently only able to see themselves, Sophie sees him. Feels him. She becomes the protector for him that Anthony normally is for everyone else. Knowing that he has someone out there watching his back in that way makes me so happy. I loved how open and honest their conversation was. I felt like he could breathe again. Being in the presence of someone who demands nothing from is so refreshing. He had an opportunity for companionship that didn’t require transaction. In fact, it yielded to his burdens being shared. Delegated without guilt. Love, love, love it!

Sophie does a fantastic job of knocking Anthony off that white horse sometimes, and I appreciate her for it. When she encourages him to let Benedict work it out on his own, I was on board with that. They all have to learn to be self-sufficient eventually. Obviously, Benedict is a capable man, but I'm sure there are plenty of things he hasn't had to concern himself with because Anthony was always there to take care of it. Same with Colin. And I think Sophie is a good reminder to him that he has helped raise competent men who can, and will, be the solution to their own problems sometimes. Anthony doesn't need to unnecessarily add to his list.

My absolute favorite exchange between them was when she made the quip about saving her best barbs for her most worthy adversary. Something about that was so intimate and special. It was lighthearted and fun, but it was also an acknowledgment of their relationship having a deep understanding of one another. They appreciate each other in a way that stands separate from others.

Anyway, I'm rambling on... Well done, friend. Beautiful as always. 🩷

Marzipan

Characters: Anthony Bridgerton, Sophie Beckett Rated: G Word count: 2.5k

Summary: Just a conversation between my favorite in-laws.

Everyone seemed to be speaking at once. Even though Sophie knew each of her relatives were waiting their turn to talk, they leapt so eagerly after each other that any pause was indiscernible. Everyone was so fervent in sharing their own news, it started to sound like a wall of noise. She and Anthony were the only two who remained silent. She watched her brother-in-law at the head of the dinner table patiently nodding at each speaker, but his jaw was flexing in that way that signaled his mounting stress.

First it was Kate, looking exhausted, bemoaning how little Charlotte kept falling into tantrums that would not relent. Then Colin, arrived without his wife, repeatedly explaining how the roof of his townhouse was in need of repairs and how costly it would be. The aim of his musings was not subtle. He was clearly hoping to gather family funds for the expense. Next Violet, reminding them all that Eloise and Phillip had invited them to Romney Hall for the twins’ birthday and that gifts would need to be purchased. Lastly Benedict, sitting dejectedly in the rare cloud of gloom that only overtook him before his work went on display somewhere. He had entered a landscape into a charitable auction at Somerset House which began the next day. Even though he was long past making a name for himself as a distinguished artist, any time he revealed a new piece and particularly when that piece’s worth would be judged, he became restless and withdrawn. As his mother asked him about his entry he stared at the table, rambling that it wasn’t to his satisfaction and no one was obligated to bid on it and he hoped its purchaser would ultimately burn it.

Sophie let him grumble on. She had tried to soothe his concerns in every manner she knew how, all to no avail. This was simply part of his process and she had lost the energy to contend with it. So she sat in silence, listening to the complaints and worries and to-do lists of the family. She had been looking forward to dinner at Bridgerton House but now felt guilty for adding more dour conversation to the evening. Watching Anthony’s face, she could see how each matter piled upon him. She was reminded of when Araminta would confront her with a list of chores, demanding more tasks than were humanly possible to complete in a day and stressing that each one must be given top priority. She saw the same slump in Anthony’s shoulders as she had felt then, the same tight-lipped assent, and her heart went out to him.

When the meal finally ended the Viscount mumbled something about business and disappeared into his study. The rest of them gathered in the smoking room, Colin and Benedict breaking into the brandy while Violet and Kate discussed the children. With the excuse of seeking out a book to read, Sophie ducked out of their company and retrieved her cloak, pulling out the small box she had brought with her. It was a gift for Anthony, or rather, for the both of them. An assortment of brightly colored marzipan fruits. They were the only two people in the entire Bridgerton clan who enjoyed them and they seized every opportunity to share. They often kept their indulgences secret so as to avoid the tired ridicule lobbed at them by their spouses. 

They had their reasons for loving the sweets which they had only seen fit to confide in each other. For Sophie, they were the only treat she had tasted for the first two decades of her life. Both her distant father and cruel stepfamily had despised the candy as much as the Bridgertons, but curiously always kept trays of it available for company. Being who she was, no one ever offered her sweets and she found that the marzipans were the one thing that would go unnoticed if nicked. So it was the only treat she allowed herself to avoid being rapped on the knuckles. The candies took part in Anthony’s early memories too. Afternoons spent with his father who used the small shapes to teach him the names of the fruits. When he had pronounced each one correctly, he earned the reward of eating it and had never lost his fondness for the flavor.

Package in hand, Sophie knocked on the study door and stepped in when Anthony replied. He was seated behind the massive desk, the picture of duty, intently scribbling between stacks of parchment. He blinked when he saw her.

“Sophie. What can I do for you?” His tone was polite but she knew him well enough to hear the undertone of vexation. He was begrudgingly ready to add her problems to his endless list of responsibilities.

Happily, she had none to give him. She smirked and held out the box. “Help me with these?”

After a moment’s confusion, his face lit up and he smiled back. She handed him the gift and he cut the ribbon off with a letter opener. 

“Ladies first,” he lilted, holding it out for her selection. She chose a lemon and took a bite, standing by the corner of the desk. He picked an apple and popped it whole into his mouth. They savored in silence for a moment, grinning at each other.

“I don’t want to distract you from pressing matters, but it seemed you could use a reprieve.” Sophie explained.

Anthony nodded, the crease returning to his brow as he began to shuffle through his papers. “I have been…tired of late. I thought it was difficult to manage everything when my siblings were children. But now with all of these marriages, nieces, nephews, my own children, the estate, it’s…” He rubbed a hand across his eyes. “Many calls on my funds.”

“And your patience?” She quirked an eyebrow at him.

Unlike other members of his family who might have asked the question in judgment, he knew Sophie asked out of concern. He sank back in his chair and grimaced. “Did it show?”

She shrugged. “No more than usual.” The smirk she shot him was so reminiscent of his brother, he had to chuckle.

Then he went back to signing. He had inked his name on so many pages that week, it was starting to look like a foreign alphabet to him. “Well, everyone’s perception of me is the least of my concerns, as long as the coffers are filled.”

Sophie stepped forward. “Anthony, please tell me you do not mean that. You know your family sees you as more than a purse.”

He continued writing without looking up. “Mmm. I’m sure I’m a disappointment as a brother too.”

She frowned. “You are my brother now and I wouldn’t say that.”

“You were spared from growing up with me.” He huffed.

“Perhaps that gives me the clearest perspective.” Her tone was soft, but so insistent it forced him to look at her. She settled into the chair across from him. “I won’t deny you a moment of self pity. But I won’t tolerate your self doubt. It is evident to anyone with eyes how much you have done for this family and how wholly you have succeeded. Would your siblings even have their grand homes, their respectable marriages, their roofs that need repairing, if you had not managed your estate so well? Would they all gather together so frequently and with so much obvious joy if you had not kept them all from fracturing over hardships these many years?” 

Anthony swallowed hard, something stirring in his chest. A part of him knew she spoke the truth, but it was muffled beneath the well-practiced voice that had denied it for his entire adult life. Then Sophie fixed her eyes on his.

“Would I be here?” She asked softly. “Or would your brother have fled the country to scandalously marry a maid, never to be seen again? Other gentlemen in your position would have cast me out. Other gentleman in your position did cast me out.” She paused, remembering her absent father, her cruel employers, and how Anthony was the one head of household who had ever treated her with kindness. “But you embraced me. For the love of your brother and your dedication to your family. I’m sure it feels as if your days are nothing but shuffling coins and signing contracts but what you are doing is protecting us. Saving us. And we love you for it.” She gave him a small smile, eyes welling with the gratitude she hoped to express.

He stared back at her, blinking back his own tears. When he had first met Sophie, he couldn’t imagine anyone with whom he had less in common. Then over the years as his sister-in-law, she had proven him wrong again and again to the point that she became a trusted confidante, a dear friend, and the only person who would speak to him with such raw, uncomplicated honesty. Simon would keep him in check, but they both carried the bravado of their titles into their conversations. Kate of course knew the furthest depths of his soul, but matters of the heart and mind often became entangled with each other and the myriad sacrifices and obligations of marriage. With Sophie, there was no pretense. She had nothing to lord over him and he could let the trappings of his position fall away around her. She was the one person in his family to whom they meant nothing and he cherished her for that. He had worried he would rue the day when he finally relented and gave his blessing to her marriage with Benedict. Now, he knew it was one of the days that had permanently altered his life for the better.

He returned her smile, his voice cracking. “Have I told you how grateful I am for you?”

Sophie sniffed, her heart warmed through. “Not lately, but I forgive you.” They laughed, blinking away their tears as the mood lightened. “I do wish there was more I could do to help.”

Anthony sighed, shifting papers once again. “I know you have a head for figures, but all these expenses require my signature, I’m afraid.” 

“What about the children? Alex misbehaved in precisely the same way as Charlotte when he was her age. I could share my tricks with Kate.”

He smiled. “That would be very appreciated.” 

Sophie nodded and leaned forward to pluck another candy from the box. She stood and paced slowly before the fireplace as she chewed.

Anthony took a second treat for himself. “How long are you staying in the city?” He asked, mouth full.

She shrugged. “However long it takes for Benedict to work through his anxieties about the gallery auction. He’ll be buzzing around trying to overhear how his work is being received.”

The endeared annoyance in her tone was obvious. Anthony licked the sugary paste off his teeth and rested his elbows on the arms of his chair. “You know, one of the Somerset directors is an acquaintance of mine.”

Sophie whipped around with a scowl. “Anthony, don’t. You must let him do this on his own. Even if that means letting him fail.”

“I only wish to help.”

“I know that.” Her voice softened and she walked back to him. “Help him by attending the showing. Tell him what you think of his work.”

He nodded, contemplating. “I admit that is something I’ve often failed to do.”

“You are busy, he knows that.”

“I’m not sure he’s ever forgiven me for the fiasco with the Academy.” He mumbled.

“He has.” Sophie reassured him, having had this conversation with Benedict many times as she helped him forge more confidence in his work. “He knew your heart was in the right place. He can be distant because he’s trying so desperately to prove his worth on his own merits.” She began to pace again, a degree of exasperation rising to the surface as she rambled, half to herself.  “He wants to feel that he has truly earned everything and isn’t just praised for his name. But even when I show him all the evidence that he has earned it, he can be so insecure that he refuses to accept it. Sometimes I simply…” She cut herself off, turning back to Anthony, embarrassed and guilty. “I’m sorry. This is not your concern. This is the last thing you need.”

Anthony got to his feet and carried the box to where she stood. “My brother’s happiness is my concern. As is yours.” He held out the marzipan and they each took one more. “I know how he can be. You can always come to me if you need a sympathetic ear.”

Sophie smiled gratefully as she chewed. Her eyes roved, assessing his face as she shook her head. “The two of you.” She murmured.

“What about us?” He grinned. “Miserable louts through and through?”

She laughed. “Of your own making, you can be. You who care too little about how your work is perceived, and him who cares too much. But in one way you are the same.”

He cocked his head. “And what way is that?”

“That you care for each other.” She smiled. “You want to see each other happy despite how you struggle to communicate it. You Bridgertons may share one brain cell between you but the loyalty and kindness of your hearts is unquestionable.”

Anthony glared at her with mock warning. “Careful with your derision. I’ll remind you that you are a Bridgerton too. As are my wife and all of our children.”

“Yes, and I dare say we have multiplied the smarts in this family by joining it.” With a devilish smirk she moved away, scanning the nearby bookshelves for something to bring back to the smoking room. 

Anthony snorted, crossing his arms. “Do you speak to your husband with such boldness?”

Sophie shrugged, examining a volume. “He can hold his own. But I save my choicest barbs for my worthiest adversary.” She flashed her eyes back to him and they both grinned.

Anthony walked to his desk, energized. “I will go to Somerset House for the auction tomorrow. If you might spend the day with Kate and the children, I will use the peace to finish all of this,” he waved at his papers. “Then I’ll join you in the evening.”

“Excellent.” Sophie beamed, grateful to see the resolve back in his posture and to know they had formed a plan that would hopefully address everyone’s needs. She always left her conversations with Anthony feeling better. He lent her strength and she hoped that she lent him some clarity and assurance in turn. She stood at the door. “I shall need an escort while my husband is showcasing his talent. I’m sure if a Viscount were to criticize some of the competing pieces the other patrons would think more carefully about their bids, yes?”

He met her conspiratorial eyebrow with a broad smile. “Indeed. Goodnight, sister.”

With a small nod she moved to slip out but he paused her with his final words, uttered softly. “Thank you.” She turned back, heart filled by the emotion that shone out of his eyes. “Thank you, brother.”

Tagging: @angels17324 @bridgertontess @broooookiecrisp @secretagentbucky @colettebronte @faye-tale

[imagine-organization-xiii]

If i may ask; can i please have how the org 13 members act around their crush? Thank you in advance ❤️

Masterlist - Incorrect Organization XIII - Tip Jar!

You might also like: when they realize they’re in love with s/o

This was a long-ish one that’s been sitting in the back of my drafts forever lmao - I hope you all enjoy, especially since it’s a bit of long read!

Special thanks to Miss Silverspoon, PhantomMuze, and Sam for helping with Luxord, Saix, and Vexen. Such babes.

-

Xemnas - Least likely to actually show it. I mean, there will be signs, but it won’t be blatant that he’s acting a certain way because he’s attracted to you. There might be some favoritism (giving you better missions, not scolding you when something goes wrong, looking the other way in certain situations.)

Overall, it’s going to be subtle. You definitely won’t pick up anything weird, but the other org members might. Saix will definitely be the one to come up to you, grab you by the shoulders and give you a good shake. “Please, he’s driving the rest of us crazy.” And you’re like “what the hell???” Saix: “Xemnas has been giving you the best missions and staring at you for five minute intervals. In his language, that means he’s practically a wanton hussy.”

Xigbar - Not ashamed in the slightest. He won’t even act any different. He finds you attractive, you find him attractive (Xigbar: “Everyone finds me attractive, obviously.”) So why bother wasting time?  He doesn’t really call it a crush, though. He thinks crushes are for children and he’s a man, god damn it, he doesn’t have crushes.

An unintentional sap. Before he plucks up the courage to say something to you - and it takes him longer than he will ever admit - he finds himself going soft for you. Thinks you’re pretty, instead of hot; wants to hold your hand instead of slam you against the wall. It’s a bit infuriating to him at first, but also maybe kind of worth it.

Xaldin - Ohhhh, man. He’s been in love before; he’s been hurt before. So he is ready to rein in that shit immediately. But it’s so difficult because he likes you so much and you’re so awesome. He’ll decide to give it a chance eventually, but it will take some time. He would definitely be content with just being friends, though, because he really doesn’t want to ruin what the two of you already have.

He makes sure to always be there for you. Always helps you when you need it. A gentleman in the ways that matter and a feisty, flirtatious beast in the ways that don’t. The type of guy to flirt by making sure that he takes his shirt off after a sweaty workout and casually flexes/stretches when he knows you’re watching but also makes sure you’re hydrated and wrapping your fists correctly when you spar.

Vexen - You’ll probably know about his crush before he does. He’s so absorbed in whatever his task is - his experiments, his theories, etc. - that he doesn’t even notice that his eyes linger on you and his posture automatically straightens when you walk into the lab. He’ll instinctively turn his body in your direction so that you’re almost always in his line of sight.

Doesn’t yell at you for walking into his lab when he’s obviously busy. Actually asks you for your input, likes talking to you and discussing his theories with you. You’re smart, but some of his experiments are beyond you, and he doesn’t mind explaining in simpler terms when you ask questions. It blows Zexion’s mind because he has a running tab on the different ways that Vexen throws people out of his lab and he’s never done it to you.

Lexaeus - not much for flirting. He’s come to terms with the fact that he likes you, but you’ve both known each other long enough that you know him, so there’s no way that he can pretend to act a certain way because you would know that something wasn’t right. It’s very difficult to tell that he has a crush on you - there’s no blushing, no flirting, no favoritism. He’s just his normal self.

When you finally figure it out, you realize that he showed his crush in subtle ways instead - offering a hand to pull you up after sparring, holding open a door for you, and apparently glaring at people who come up to flirt with you when he accompanies you to the market for groceries.

Zexion - “IT’S NOT LIKE I LIKE YOU OR ANYTHING, GO AWAY.” This emo little bastard doesn’t know how to deal with his emotions. He lost his heart at a really bad time, when he was still growing into himself, learning balance between anger, frustration, patience, euphoria, etc. so he’s very unfamiliar and uncomfortable with the idea that he likes you.

There may be a few gentle shoves and punches in the shoulder. He has so many feelings and has no way to put them into the world other than violence - because that’s really all he knows nowadays. But it gets better!!! You learn together.

Saix - Honestly, God help you if Saix gets a crush on you because he really doesn’t make it easy. If anything, he’ll be making your life difficult. He overcompensates about not giving you any special treatment, giving you harder and more difficult tasks/missions, or your workload might remain the same but his expectations are almost impossibly high. He’s not only trying to prove himself to the others; he’s trying to prove to himself that he doesn’t care.

He’s more difficult to be around tbh, and yeah, he’ll definitely seek you out which is a pain in the ass when you’re trying to avoid him. You’ll have to be the one to barge into his office, slam open the door, and yell at him that he’s being an asshole. He’ll probably back off a bit, but.... he’s really only rough on you because he knows you’re capable of more.

Axel - Axel falls in love unapologetically. He’s head over heels almost immediately and not even ashamed of his crush on you. Flirting becomes almost a part of your friendship because he’s just that comfortable with you. His mood is already so bright when he’s around you, but now it’s like the sun and you can’t help but meet his smile with your own grin.

But it gets to be kind of weird on his end because... you don’t realize that he’s being serious when he flirts? So many pick up lines. So many compliments. But you’re just like “oh that same old Axel haha,” and he’s left banging his head against the wall because he likes you so much but you’re so oblivious.

Demyx - He won’t even notice that he has a crush on you tbh. It will take him forever to notice. He knows he’s attracted to you, but he’s attracted to a lot of people so he didn’t think that it would be any different! A crush?? In this economy??? But he’s grateful, you know? Because there really couldn’t be a better person for him to have a crush on - like he could have a crush on Xemnas, of all people, and that would just be disastrous.

Doesn’t act differently until he realizes he has a crush. When he does realize, he’ll get nervous and clumsy. Shouting from across the hall, “HEY LET ME GET THE DOOR FOR YOU” and runs, trips, and knocks out a tooth. Just completely ridiculous stuff. You kind of notice that he’s acting strange, but it’s just Demyx, and it will probably take Vexen going up to you and saying “please put him out of his misery before he accidentally kills himself trying to flirt with you”

Luxord - Luxord is so charming, more charming than he usually is. He always has this endearing aura around him, and man, he turns it up when he tries to flirt with you. A gift giver - small things, a dessert you might like, a flower he stole from Marluxia’s garden, lunch when you’re busy, etc. Very aware of how to approach you; also knows where to stop before he goes too far. Knows how to read you pretty well in that respect.

Loves the romance that comes with having a crush because there’s so much raw potential. Feelings are confusing, they take a while to grow, but the idea that something amazing can be coming in the future is a great feeling to him. Great potential hangout ideas that don’t necessarily have to be dates, but they help you both metaphorically test the waters about what a real relationship could be.

Marluxia - arguably the most romantic out of everyone. Surprisingly?? Also the most sensible. Of the mind that, you know, if you like someone then do something about it. He has a crush on you? Why not just give it a shot, then? He’ll bring you flowers! Accompany you when you go somewhere! Take you for garden walks! Take you out to dinner!

Somewhere along the line it just becomes a relationship and not just a crush and he’s like, yeah I did this. When everyone’s like “omg how did you get her to like you back” he’s just like “because I did something about it unlike all of you idiots.”

Larxene - Listen. Listen. Larxene is a strong independent woman who doesn’t need someone else in her life to make her feel loved and powerful but damn, you’re so awesome and she has the biggest crush on you even though all of her instincts say that she’s being dumb. Will ask you to spar with her as an excuse to get close to you and don’t be surprised if she’s extra harsh when sparring - she definitely won’t be pulling her punches.

When you get closer, she’ll open up to you in a way that she won’t open up to anyone else, which is a big, obvious flag for you that her feelings may be more than friendship. She doesn’t like talking about herself or her past, so hearing things she’s never told anyone (except maybe Marluxia), makes you feel really great about being her friend.

Roxas - Man, he is such a cute little marshmallow, not shy in general but shy around his crush. He’ll do his hardest not to blush around you, but he does get nervous. So nervous, in fact, that he might make you think he doesn’t like you because he’ll tend to avoid you when he can. He doesn’t want to look stupid in front of you.

This baby feels things deeply, despite the lack of a heart. He always has felt things more deeply than others. Likes physical contact so when he gets over his fears of being around you, he’ll probably end up asking to hold your hand, randomly hugging you, giving high fives, etc.

Xion - Only really falls for people that she’s already friends with, because she knows them and she’s comfortable with them. It’s subtle for her, though. She’ll realize her crush one night and suddenly she can’t even speak to you without blushing, cheeks a bright pink against her pale skin. She’ll stutter, too, and she hates that’s she’s so nervous for no reason because you’re friends!!! And she has no reason to be nervous!!!

She’s also so helpful when she has a crush! Like Demyx, she’s eager to help you with whatever you’re doing, whether that’s mission reports, cooking, cleaning, etc. Unlike Demyx, she actually gets the job done and doesn’t get injured when trying to help. You’re always so grateful and thankful and that just makes her blush even more.

[royalwilmon]

fic: all my life is arm in arm with you

wilhelm/simon: the world doesn't seem as overwhelming when Wilhelm has someone by his side, holding his hand through it all.

Leaving a couple of things purposely ambiguous. Namely, the when, where, and what. The focus here is on Wilhelm’s anxiety and Simon’s response - the setting and circumstances of this interaction can be whatever you imagine, or nothing at all. Content warning for a detailed description of the physicality of an anxiety attack. Note that I’m basing this on my own personal very real experiences with anxiety. The title is from “When You’ve Got Trouble” by Liz Longley. I strongly suggest you give it a listen after you read this!

[Read on AO3]

The room was getting smaller.

Or maybe it wasn’t. It was hard to tell. Wilhelm’s eyes darted from wall to wall. Each time he looked back, he could have sworn that they were closer still, inch by inch. It scared him as he thought about what might happen if the walls closed in on him completely. He began to feel claustrophobic. He could feel the lost air in the room tighten in his throat. It felt like two strong hands were reaching through the back of his chest to grip both of his lungs, firmly squeezing with increasing intensity.

Wilhelm brought a hand to his collarbone and pressed down, countering the phantom pressure with his own. Slowly he rubbed, willing the balance of forces to provide some sort of relief. When it didn’t, he pressed harder.

At the same time, Wilhelm’s breathing quickened, letting itself out of his body in erratic puffs. He tried to breathe normally, but it felt like his lungs were working independently from the rest of his body. The more he focused on trying to control it, the more he felt like each and every part of him had disconnected from the rest, unable to work together to keep him breathing.

Wilhelm hated this. He hated this too familiar physical reaction to the world around him. He hated his mind for causing it, his body for reacting, hated himself, hated this, he hated, hated, hated. The thoughts bounced around his mind, ricocheting off the edges and multiplying to create a swarm of hateful ideas. It was suffocating.

Just as he felt his knees begin to buckle, gravity tempting him to pull his body downward and collapse, he startled at a sudden touch. He felt a pair of arms snake around his middle. Warm, soft, familiar. One hand resting flat on his stomach, the other reaching up, trailing along his arm gently until the hand settled on top of his own. The hand that still pushed helplessly against his chest.

Simon.

“Wille?”

Simon’s voice was barely more than a whisper, hardly more than a breath, but it still rang clear in Wilhelm’s ears and instantly filled his body with unexpected yet comfortable warmth. Wilhelm wasn’t expecting Simon to be around. But then again, Simon always did seem to have a sort of sixth sense for knowing when Wilhelm needed him most. It was one of an infinitely growing list of things he loved and appreciated about his partner.

Wilhelm didn’t answer Simon’s greeting right away, the fullness in his throat still too sizable to allow for enough air to speak. Wilhelm instead focused himself on the feeling of a second heartbeat behind his, where Simon’s body stood flush against his own. It was slower and steadier than Wilhelm’s, keeping time with the gentle breathing he could feel warm the back of his neck.

Wilhelm then remembered something he and Simon had practiced many times before - trying to get him to match Simon’s steadier breathing. Inhale, exhale. It had been a long time since Wilhelm’s anxiety had been this bad. As he focused in and slowed his breathing - inhale, exhale - Wilhelm took a moment to be so thankful that Simon had been nearby to help him through this now. He had been doing so well for so long and wasn’t sure he was still able to handle it on his own. Inhale, exhale.

“Wille, it’s okay. It’s okay.”

Simon let go of him, and for the briefest moment, the hands on Wilhelm’s lungs began to tighten again. He struggled on his inhale. Before he could exhale, Simon was there in front of him, and he reached out to pull him close in a needy embrace.

Wilhelm clung to Simon like the world would end if they did not perfectly merge their bodies together into one. He buried his head in Simon’s neck, breathing in the scent of him. Wilhelm took every opportunity to use his arms to try to pull Simon closer and closer. Simon was simply there for him, letting Wilhelm grasp at his body and offering his embrace in return. They stayed that way for some time, mostly in comfortable silence, save for when Simon would occasionally whisper Wilhelm’s name or words of comfort sweetly into his hair.

After several minutes, Simon pulled away to get a good look at Wilhelm. He reached up and held Wilhelm’s head in his hands, his fingers curling around his neck and thumbs resting gently on his jaw. Wilhelm immediately relaxed into the touch.

Simon was calm. His eyes were warm, and they were looking directly into Wilhelm’s. The only sign of distress was the slight frown on his lips. Simon brushed his thumbs across Wilhelm’s cheeks, wiping away some tears that Wilhelm hadn’t even realized he’d shed.

Simon kept on holding his gaze, not breaking eye contact even to blink. Wilhelm realized at this point that he was waiting for him to speak. Although he knew that Simon was patient and would give Wilhelm as long as was needed, he wanted Simon to understand that he was alright. Or, rather, that he would be alright soon. He closed his eyes, swallowed, took a shallow breath, and then looked back up to Simon.

“Hej.” Wilhelm’s breath hitched as he spoke, but he was glad just to have gotten sound out.

“Hej,” Simon replied easily as his frown began to turn upward. He removed one hand from Wilhelm’s face to tuck a stray lock of hair behind his ear. The piece of hair promptly fell right back, but Simon let it be. “How are you feeling?”

It wasn’t uncommon for Simon to ask this question at any given time on a typical day. That was one of the many things Wilhelm adored about Simon. He always wanted to be in tune with how Wilhelm was feeling. The pair had worked hard early in their relationship to make sure they communicated their emotions well enough to stay on the same page, through the good and the bad alike. The more they were able to talk about how they were feeling, the stronger their relationship became. So, Wilhelm made an effort to always answer the question as honestly as he was able.

How was he feeling? Wilhelm carefully considered the question.

Mentally, his thoughts were still racing at a rapid pace: jumping to conclusions, dwelling on the “what ifs”, fixating on the unknown. This was true of how Wilhelm’s mind functioned normally, but the anxiety amplified it tenfold. Physically, his breathing had slowed, but the pressure on his lungs still weighed down on him. His body now felt uncomfortably warm. Wilhelm felt the heat burning in his fingertips. Meanwhile, his head was so full it felt empty.

He answered. “Dizzy. A little.”

“Okay,” Simon nodded. “Okay, let’s sit you down.”

Simon pressed a kiss to Wilhelm’s cheek and then grabbed his arm and led him over to a nearby sofa. The pair sat side by side, each at an angle to face each other, knees touching. Wilhelm immediately took Simon’s hands into his own.

Wilhelm traced his fingertips against Simon’s, grateful not only to busy his hands but also to touch something so familiar to him. He knew every surface, bend, and scar on those hands by heart. Simon’s fingers were calloused from the guitar he had been picking up to practice more and more frequently as of late. These hands made music. Wilhelm loved these hands just as he loved the man they belonged to.

“Sorry, I didn’t think this would-” Wilhelm began, eyes focused on where their fingers were intertwined. Simon shook his head and interrupted him.

“No, don’t apologize, Wille.”

“I’m glad you’re here.” Wilhelm exhaled. He shifted his body to rest his head on Simon’s shoulder. He smiled. “Thank you for being here.”

“Do you want to talk about it now or later?”

Wilhelm appreciated the question. He knew it was important to talk about what triggered this intense burst of anxiety, and he absolutely would speak with Simon about it in time. Still, having the option to wait a while before starting to tackle his problems was a great comfort to him. Simon had always been great about giving Wilhelm proper space and time when he needed it.

Wilhelm answered. “Later.”

“Okay,” Simon nodded, turning his neck so he could press his lips to Wilhelm’s forehead. “What can I do for you now?”

“Just stay with me.”

“Of course,” Simon answered as if it was the only response that existed, his voice so full of certainty and assurance. Wilhelm had never felt safer.

Sometimes, the world felt too big for Wilhelm. It made him feel small when he knew that that was not what the world needed from him. There were expectations and traditions he needed to abide by that often felt difficult for Wilhelm to handle. It was then that Wilhelm started to doubt whether or not he could truly be what everybody around him wanted him to be.

It was Simon who made him feel like he was enough. Simon made him feel safe, and loved, and seen. Simon made him feel capable and strong. Knowing he had this man’s love and support made Wilhelm stronger, and Wilhelm knew he would move mountains to give it all back to him. They were a team.

The world didn’t seem as overwhelming when he had someone by his side, holding his hand through it all.

It would be okay.

He would be okay.

♫

[softinkshadows]

Shingeki no Kyojin Astrology: sun-moon-rising combinations

I was looking around tumblr for detailed astrology speculations of my fave anime characters, but there aren't that many! Being q well-versed in astro myself, i thought why not do my own version (very spoiler-free, don’t worry)! I followed the birth dates given by isayama:

Eren Jaeger - Aries sun, Scorpio moon, Cancer rising Aside from the fact that he can be hotheaded and impulsive, Eren's feelings of vengeance run deep and explosive. Remember that time he was chained to the bed after the attack on trost, and his eyes were wild with the need to violently eradicate all titans? He's so tenacious and emotionally stubborn too (a Scorp moon trait) to the point of being closed off from everyone else, especially towards the end where he seems to take the weight of the world's burden on his own shoulders. And all for the sake of protecting his community and ensuring the safety of his friends for the rest of their lives. His comrades and family are his motivation. This is his Cancer rising steering his life.

Mikasa Ackerman - Aries sun, Aquarius moon, Aries rising "Look that moody brat is running off on her own again." Mikasa is similar to Eren in her impulsiveness and determination, but different in two ways- what they aim to protect and their extent of fearlessness. Eren is aware of his own weaknesses and helplessness, but Mikasa's amazing physical prowess makes her act without any hesitation at all. She's hella fierce and driven to keep herself in shape too, doing all those sit-ups and chopping firewood post-injury. I think she deserves a double Aries! An Aries rising means a Libra descendant too, which is reflected her whole-hearted devotion in her close partnerships (Eren and Armin). Her aquarius moon really shines thru with her stoic independence, focus and perseverance.

Armin Arlet - Scorpio sun, Virgo moon, Pisces rising He's the brain of the 104th cadet corps, and is second to Erwin in terms of strategy! An intelligent planner with low self-esteem often found second guessing his own analytical abilities, Armin is a true blue Virgo moon. His emotional self stands out the most from the main three protagonists - Eren & Mikasa mostly express anger and desperation, whereas Armin is usually shrouded in fear and worry. He's a very soft bb, hence the Pisces rising, not to mention he gets so dreamy imagining the sea, the vast plains, and the magical world beyond the walled universe he knows. A spiritually-attuned and curious explorer :")

Levi Ackerman - Capricorn sun, Scorpio moon, Virgo rising Levi is such a complex person, thanks to Isayama's brilliance. Like many Cap suns, Levi is authoritative, cold and incredibly savage. That's not to say he doesn't feel anything either. Levi is an evolved Scorp moon (maybe even moon in 11th house) because his feelings are never for himself, but he hurts so much for others - you can tell every death hits him so hard, but he doesn't show this to anyone else. He also exudes this quietly intimidating aura of natural competence, a common characteristic of this sun-moon combo. He can take things personally as well (re: height issues) but it never snowballs into more than passing irritation. The turbulence of his emotions and habit for violence is balanced out by his earthy Virgo rising, which is emotionally subdued, quite thin and delicate in physique, and super neurotic and nitpicky when it comes to cleanliness and health. Cap, Virgo and Scorp are some of the most guarded signs, and a combi of all 3 are hellish. You can tell this poor beautiful man is always caught between feeling and thinking, between maintaining his humanity and forsaking it.

Erwin Smith - Libra sun, Capricorn moon, Leo rising In another life, Erwin Smith would be the damn CEO of a global conglomerate because he oozes so much charisma. Hell if charisma were energy Erwin Smith would be its prime, eternally renewable source. His stature alone is so commanding, and I find some strong Leonine traits in his thickset physique, strong eyebrows, beautiful hair, and that way he shouted in full glory atop wall Rose in that one episode to the cheering masses below. He might be a Libra sun, diplomatic in political affairs, but his Capricorn moon is what drives his decisions. Cap moon has a rep for being cold and unemotional, but i believe they are way more than that! Cap moons rarely boast about their long list of achievements, instead looking forward to the next goal. They struggle with emotional expression, and are super driven and disciplined. Erwin is capable of making the hardest decisions, putting aside emotions to strive for an abstract ideal, and this is to be expected of the commander who takes on the role of the devil.

Hange Zoe - Virgo sun, Sagittarius moon, Gemini rising All hail our favourite mad scientist!! Hange is such a breath of fresh air in the Survey Corps, balancing out the heaviness of missions with their wacky tales of titan research and experimentation. Their penchant for study and higher knowledge is typical of a Sagittarius moon, who is drawn to advanced academic study and spiritual truths. It's also a lighthearted and optimistic sign, true to Hange's upbeat personality. The Virgo in them contributes to their sheer intelligence and obsessiveness with research subjects. We also know they LOVE to talk, and once Eren asks Hange about experiments, they cannot stop (Gemini governs communication). Virgo, Sag and Gemini are the most intellectual signs, and because they are mutuable Hange tends to follow orders rather than give them, making it difficult to adapt to their new role towards the end of the series. Mutable signs also means rapidly-changing emotional states, and a whole lot of chaos, which suits our beloved squad leader.

Jean Kirstein - Aries sun, Virgo moon, Taurus rising Our third Aries on the list ohmygod. The snk universe is full of feisty hotheads. Jean is always seen clashing with Eren, fuelled by Eren's closeness with Mikasa and his own adorable jealousy. I mean, they had a full on fist fight right after dinner in the mess hall, although everything went downhill after the first few punches. Our first impression of Jean during his cadet days is coloured by his desire to work in the interior, and this favour for material safety and wealth is perhaps common to a Taurus rising. Also, Taurus is ruled by Venus, planet of beauty and harmony, and thus often figures in the charts of artists. If you've seen Jean's drawing skills in that special episode, you'll know that his artistic abilities are the finest we have seen, exceeding even that of isayama himself. Jean's strong principles such as being averse to killing people and oftentimes cynical nature, is also characteristic of the moral and cautious Virgo moon.

Sasha Braus - Leo sun, Gemini moon, Taurus rising Not all Leos are showmans. Sasha is the type of Leo who displays more of the quirky, unabrashed personality suited to her opposite sister sign Aquarius. Authority doesn't exist when food comes into play, as we see when she breaks potato with Shadis and later steals a slab of meat from the officer's warehouse. Unlike the visual artistry that Jean possesses with his Taurus rising, Sasha's Taurus centers around her love for food, and hell she can have fiery determination for it (rmb the wild night she mistook Jean's hand for meat?). I love that both of them were pitted with each other in that cooking special episode. I considered placing her as a Taurus moon, but Taurus moons are usually steadier and classier in emotion, whereas Sasha is often breezy, gets nervous and chaotic, with stellar intuition, making her likely a Gemini moon.

Connie Springer - Taurus sun, Cancer moon, Gemini rising Although not much attention is paid to Connie's growth, his character development reminds me a lot of Aang from ATLA. Cheery and happy-go-lucky at first, before the incident with his mother made him more prone to feelings of anger and vengeance, especially near the later chapters. His strong protective bond with his mother is what compels me to say he is a Cancer moon, which is a moon sign that is very homebody and drawn to family and traditions. His goofy self and him referring to Sasha as "his twin" puts him as the spunky Gemini rising, another sign he shares with her.

Reiner Braun - Leo sun, Pisces moon, Capricorn rising Aside from his natural leader personality (Leonine), Reiner likes to take on the persona of the big brother of the group. His outward stoicism, decisiveness and task-oriented nature is typical of a Cap rising, who is often serious and solemn in appearance. He reminds me of that Cap rising workaholic who does his best in a corporate organization, working 9 to 5 plus overtime as it fulfills his sense of purpose. Beyond his stoic facade reveals a more troubled personality. Like a Pisces moon, Reiner is impressionable, and it's difficult to tell if his emotions and personalities are his own, wavering and absorbing traits from those around him. His internal war with his identity and the ensuing fatigue characterises him during the second half of the series.

Annie Leonhart - Aries sun, Aquarius moon, Virgo rising Annie is the kind of Aries that is so motivated to achieve her goals that everything else is sidelined, including her own emotions. She's quite ruthless in chasing her objectives, and her composure, focus and endurance is highlighted with an Aquarius moon. I'm guessing she has a 4th house influence somewhere because of her motivations to go home to her father and lead a normal life. I find the daintiness and delicateness of her features similar to Levi, who is also a Virgo rising. The Virgo effect also registers as a brutal, unfiltered honesty (also seen in Levi), and Annie doesn't hesitate to speak the truth about her own or her opponent's capabilities.

Other characters which I won't go into much detail about:

Bertholdt Hoover - Capricorn sun, Virgo moon, Pisces rising Bertholdt is quiet with an unobtrusive personality. His lack of supposed iniative and aggression can perhaps be attributed to the mutuability of Virgo and Pisces, which goes with the flow instead of charging forward. He keeps his feelings to himself, but reacts when the people he wants to protect are threatened.

Historia Reiss - Capricorn sun, Libra moon, Cancer rising Historia initially lives for the sake of others (esp Ymir), and is more co-dependent than many of her other squadmates. She also tends to put up a front of pleasantness, afraid of disappointing or offending people. She has a strong tie to family, and a profound sense of duty.

Ymir - Aquarius sun, Pisces moon, Aries rising Ymir is extremely astute when it comes to evaluating human behaviour. The religiosity of her background is also usually found in this sun-moon combination, which tends to attract paths of strong spirituality. She also has a bold and noble sacrificial streak for the sake of her companions.

Zeke Jaeger - Leo sun, Capricorn moon, Scorpio rising A headstrong, intelligent and radical character. In a way similar to Erwin in his ruthlessness, but emotionally darker and much more sinisterly private.

Kenny Ackerman - Aquarius sun, Sagittarius moon

Rod Reiss - Virgo sun, Libra moon

Dot Pixis - Virgo sun, Sagittarius moon

Hannes - Capricorn sun, Taurus moon

[ironmandeficiency]

I saw y'all discussing potential zodiac signs for Pascal's characters, what's your take on the major ones? I personally believe Marcus Pike is a cancer, Catfish's a pisces, Din's a virgo, Whiskey's an aries, Oberyn's either a leo or a libra, Ezra's a gemini or a sag, but I lean towards gemini. Javier's the poster child for Scorpio. Don't know about Maxwell Lord.

pedro character star signs

i’m so sorry it took so long, i was tweaking this so much bc i wanted to make sure i got it right! these are just what i think based on my astrology opinions, i hope you like it! 💕 i added their moon signs for flair bc i can. gonna tag a few friends i think may be interested, hope it’s not an inconvenience

max phillips: aries sun & moon. his ambition and charisma paired with the carefree attitude and optimism are an optimum fire sign duality and despite the fact i shouldn't, i love it so much. he has an inner child that he spoils with the riches of his conquests (good and bad) & gets emotional contentment when he succeeds in achieving his goals. knows what he wants & is quick to make those wants known. you never have to worry about where you stand with him because he will not hesitate to tell you.

javier peña: taurus sun with scorpio moon (the real guy is a taurus & i can see it but w heavy scorpio influence). he has his own structure and routine and will fight to the death to maintain it. very work oriented & does his best to rationalize his emotion-driven scorpio moon with his taurean logic, it's a tossup as to whether it works half the time. has a lot of emotional needs that aren't always met day to day & thats why he smokes and drinks and fucks. but don’t let anything make you doubt his love for you because the only thing stronger than his stubborn streak is his heart and its capacity to love you so damn much.

maxwell lord: libra sun with a sagittarius moon. the charisma? attractive and engaging af. oddly adept at chameleoning himself into whatever social group he's trying to vibe with. will draw eyes no matter what because so many people know him & if they don't already, they sure as hell want to. it takes him a while to learn to balance healthy relationships and his work life but when he does, you can visibly see how much healthier he is because of it. normally tends to his emotions in private but with help, he can start sharing a bit more. more optimistic than he sometimes should be but it could be worse

frankie morales: pisces sun with a cancer moon. his caring and sometimes cautious nature (with a twinge of homicidal tendencies) make him one that you don't just casually fuck with sexually or otherwise. catches feelings very easy & makes a lot of emotionally-driven decisions. these two water signs have a propensity towards codependence & defensiveness when hurt. is at his best when he feels loved and is supported by those he loves. emotions are always fluctuating and there’s some trouble with self-discipline (which is not the same as self-deprecation). because of this, he needs someone who can ground him

jack "whiskey" daniels: his swagger!! his charm!! his generosity!! the protectiveness over people he cares about!! this has the makings of a leo sun. this charismatic sun sign paired with his capricorn moon create a living example of the most balanced "work hard, play hard" you've ever seen. has a tendency to set high standards for himself and others & is a smidge more accepting when people fuck up, wanting to help them be better in the future. his emotions are often repressed in the name of responsibility but when he feels safe, he isn’t shy about them in the slightest. very confident in his skills & one of those that he’s the proudest of is his ability to cheer you up when you’re sad

din djarin: he is the most virgo virgo to ever virgo, a double whammy of it in both his sun & moon placements. very logical, disciplined, and tradition-oriented. knows how to bargain and budget, approaches problems with as little emotional attachment as he can (doesn't always work though), and is selfless af. needs something to keep him from being a worry wart bc otherwise he will spend every waking moment fretting over anything he can find. remarkably well-rounded & somehow the most emotionally stable

ezra: everything about this man radiates aquarius sun + gemini moon and you will never convinve me otherwise. he's just enough of an intellectual elitist (the big words and flowy shakespearian vocabulary) for it to border on unique and fun & annoying as fuck. every aquarian i've met has a quirk that sets them apart from everyone else & ezra's quirk (besides murder) is his vocabulary. it takes him a long time to learn to not talk over people on accident (sometimes he does on purpose just to be a bastard), but you can tell when he’s really trying to be conscious of it.

marcus moreno: now this man is what you call a pisces. a softie with a heart of gold that is constantly being underestimated, he has more power than most think. his silly and carefree nature detracts from the badassery he's capable of so it sometimes catches you off guard when he goes into Badass In Charge™️ mode but it’s there. his moon is also in pisces, which adds to his gentility and desire to be understood by his partner. this man just needs some love dammit, give it to him already!! his empathy makes him the Cool Dad™️ bc missy and literally any other kid get the vibe of “yeah this adult will actually listen to me and value my opinions”

dave: capricorn sun, aries moon. he thrives with people who can handle their own shit competency kink anyone? and doesn’t have patience with those who should know better. his standards are higher than a stoned giraffe, and is at his best in controlled environments. has a strong sense of self & a short list of people he would risk it all for. not as outwardly expressive but he does have a couple cues that you learn over time. also knows what he wants and is very meticulous in how he goes about getting it; there are very few places where he takes no for an answer. is a very good provider but don’t expect him to be mushy when you thank him for things he does for you.

oberyn martell: gemini sun & leo moon. he’s got more charisma than can fit in the ocean and sometimes it gets him into trouble. this man thrives on validation from loved ones. there is never a worry about not knowing what he’s feeling because oh boy is this man expressive. he’s a protector and a provider (and a gossip but don’t let him hear you say that). can and will cause a scene if there’s ample opportunity, he enjoys watching shit go down. will only interfere if it directly impacts him or someone he really cares about but otherwise will just pop the popcorn and pull up a seat. somehow has all the details of everything that ever happens but you learn to not question it.

pero tovar: scorpio sun (but specifically october scorpio) & aquarius moon. he’s highly rational when it comes to emotions but does have a temper. he’s observant af of his environment & the emotions of everyone around him, and chooses his actions carefully based on those. doesn’t confront his deeper emotions as often as he should bc it’s easier to default to Angy™️ and let the rest of the world come to their own assumptions. has no tolerance for lies and other bs, wants the truth and though it makes him seem power-hungry and manipulative, that’s not his intention. it’s just his way of looking for someone he can trust with the most intimate parts of him

marcus pike: this man? taurus sun, cancer moon. has a fear of abandonment that takes a while to quell but once it’s gone, he’s all in. he’s very empathetic and observant af, will know exactly what you need before you voice said need. will feel guilty for his baggage sometimes and the guilt will make him recluse for a short period until he’s reminded just how appreciated he is. does not play around when it comes to affection & is very eager to give and receive it whenever possible

my friends that i think might be interested: @scribbledghost @autumnleaves1991-blog @dyke--grayson @max--phillips @dindjarindiaries @pikemoreno @ohnopoe @pedropasscals @forever-rogue @engineeredfiction @bitchin-beskar

[angelssdecay]

Why Zhongli isn’t just a blockhead (though sometimes he is) – another essay by yours truly

Disclaimer beforehand: I am partly Asian, but I am not Chinese and as such don’t have a complete grasp on the richness of Chinese lore and history although I do try to keep on educating myself about it. If you see I made any mistakes, missed out on something very important or accidentally said something I shouldn’t have please don’t hesitate to point it out for me, I’d really appreciate it. This analysis was mostly for myself and because I wanted to set a few things right about some things I’ve seen and encountered about his character in the fandom, that is all. 

This analysis ended up to be quite long (over 1.3k words oops) despite me keeping some points out of it on purpose to make it more compact, but I hope you’ll enjoy my thoughts nonetheless!

-          Zhongli is not, and has never been, simply a brute without a brain despite his undeniable trail of destruction left in the wake of the Archon war – everything he’s done, as immoral as it may seem to humans, has been done with the image of a more peaceful future in mind and the wish to create a better world for those inhabiting it. 

-          And let’s not forget that he is extremely cunning and always waging decisions carefully considering he has planned out such a grand scheme from faking his death to implementing Childe in this game of his, and using everyone in Liyue for his grand, final test 

- though he did not do so without a thinking about the weight such a final decision would hold, but instead hought long and hard about it through observations of Liyue’s people and how they would fare without his divine intervention from now on.

-          Zhongli is without a doubt not a 110% good character, he is indeed manipulative, irrational and inconsiderate of individual human lives to a certain degree and I won’t say that his objectives erase the way of his methods, after all everyone knows that the path to hell is paved by good intentions-

-          but it’s simply impossible to define any character in Genshin in such black and white/ good and bad ways because each and every of his decisions is very nuanced - he is not only selfish, Zhongli is also incredibly selfless at the same time because all that he did was for the people of Liyue, he gains literally nothing from all this apart from his rest from his immortal duties, and he is not heartless either because despite making just yet seemingly cold decisions it also has to be said that such hard decisions cannot be made and set in stone when one let’s themselves swayed by emotions

-          To come to another point: After living so far off from the mortal world for so long – because watching over humans isn’t the same as wandering amongst and living with them – it is no surprise he is quite detached from them, his heart despite his love for Liyue having petrified little by little and he knows it.

-          Yes, Zhongli definitely knows he can’t escape eventual erosion, petrifying little by little, that he will wear away as a river wears away a mountain - but still he lives on to uphold the memory of those that have faded to dust, had sacrificed their very lives to help pave the way for a peaceful and prosperous Liyue and also to carry the weight of sins he has committed in the war – he thinks and he cares so, so much and to conclude this:

-          I literally cannot stress enough how he carries so much responsibility, so much history on his shoulders – he is living history – even more now that he’s the only one left to carry on the hopes and dreams who have long passed and that this is an incredibly lonely task. It’s just heart-breaking to think about what he’s carrying with him day by day.

-          And to come to one of the most important people from his long life and who helped to shape him into who he is now: Guizhong.

-          She was one of the people who taught him that his heart is capable of more than just living for his duty, that he doesn’t only have to live as the God of Martial Arts – they were not just ‘brawns and brain’ – they were a team that complemented and completed each other

-          and Guizhong (and consequently her death as well) pushed him to embracer the other sides of his personality as well. It doesn’t matter whether people see their relationship as platonic or romantic, because the impact she has left on him is the same – as someone who believed in his gentler, more caring side

-          Zhongli is also incredibly thoughtful and perceptive, seen in the way he talks - a very refined and elegant way with every word laced by the wisdom he has accumulated without it being overbearing or coming across as absolute with no room for doubts - about various important characters in Liyue right now – accurately pinpointing their strengths and weakness and how valuable they are to making the land he has protected for so long continue to prosper

-          for example when he talks about the Yuheng and that despite, no, because of her abrasive attitude towards his deeds as a good she is a gem amongst humans and one of the many people he places their trust in to take care of Liyue’s future in his stead. Or Yanfei, the young half-Adepti who despite never having entered a contract with him, or rather doesn’t even know of his true identity upholds order and contracts within Liyue which he praises and values

-          It shows how deeply he cares about this land and its people, believing in their strength to overcome everything even without him – which is one of his most defining traits – seen in the way he has guided humanity all these years and in the way the people of Liyue have faith in him, a faith that isn’t blind or caused by fear like with Decarabian, but true respect for all he has done for the people of this land.

-          to say he’s a blockhead who doesn’t think nor care about humans is completely wrong because his entire rule for the past millennia was centered around protecting mankind – yes, it has to be said that his methods and morals are outside normal human values but it has to be kept in mind that he is an immortal god and gods neither feel nor live like humans, they understand and perceive the world differently than humans

-          gods stand outside out world and that makes it harder for them to truly connect with the way humans live - and it is only after stepping down from his throne that he actually has the chance now to try and experience the life of mortals for himself, to see and live it for himself and not as the distant overseer that Rex Lapis was.

-          and while he may feel sadness over not being needed anymore, giving up his godhood is the freedom he chose for himself, it’s something he deserves after watching over mankind for so long and trying to keep balance between the world or mortals and supernatural being

-          being free, being allowed to be selfish and think of himself outside of being a god is something he’d never done before being so incredibly bound to duty, contracts and traditions as he is; but by now he truly believes that this is the age of men as the end of the age of gods is coming to its end and it’s a beautiful thing to see him grow beyond the boundaries he had set for himself the past thousands of years

-          though in all fairness, sometimes our beloved Ex-Archon can indeed be a little of a blockhead considering he dumped the entire world of Teyvat into a financial crisis by stopping the production of one of the most important catalysts for everyday life – something that may not unfold its consequences immediately of course

-          – and even forgot to lay aside a private fund of mora but that’s because he isn’t accustomed to normal human life at all, he is still learning and more than willing to expand his horizon despite the vast knowledge he’s already accumulated over years of his life – and in the end that’s what makes him such a brilliantly lovable man, am I right?