#like yeah its been a while in internet time but
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Social media can vanish
Anything online can vanish
If something happens to the thousands of servers that sustain the websites it can and will vanish
We say "if it's on the internet it's forever" and while that's mostly true, it is 100% possible that various websites can & will be demolised under Trump's rule.
Internet archive had been and might still be in danger
Companies have been deleting their own content so the only way to access it is illegally.
The internet isn't just something that exists all the time, its a bunch of servers all over the world that can be shut down or destroyed.
Tumblr is just a bunch of servers
Same with twitter & Wikipedia (wiki needs donations every year to pay for the energy/rent/moderators) & every other website you can think of.
Hell, flash player is essentialy gone. A thing that people used to make and share their own video games is essentially gone outside of certain circumstances
A lot of servers are in the USA
& it's entirely possible that they could be shut down
Yeah it'll be a hard thing to do but is it entirely possible
Another possible thing is that people like Musk just start nuking accounts & any archived versions of them.
The internet is physical in a way & it can be destroyed.
Do I think it's v reactionary to be like "there's not gonna be history books" - yes
But seeing as the Republicans are already limiting history books, I wouldn't put it past them to try.
Back up important shit locally cuz it can vanish.
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hellou hi i have a question if you don't mind :]
so, i have been considering using the loveless label for a while because i relate to y'all heavily but there's one issue. while i don't think i experience love for other people in a way loving folk seem to describe love..? i very much want to BE loved
this is probably tied to my NPD, both the loveless and the needing love parts
basically my question is - can you still be considered a loveless aro(ace, apl etc.) if you desire to be loved (w/o being able to reciprocate)?
sorry if it's a stupid question because maybe it defeats the purpose? idk. i've searched all of the internet and couldn't find anything even close to an answer tho so yeah :')
hi anon, my apologies for taking so long to reply 😭 I don't have an excuse besides a somewhat busy schedule and "I suck at replying at reasonable times sometimes" lmao
Short answer: yes.
Long answer: the good thing about the loveless label is that it's deliberately meant as a very fluid and dynamic label, defined by its user first and foremost. Some people call themselves loveless because they don't feel love at all, while others may use it because the love they feel does not seem to fit societal expectations, or even because they do feel love, but it's not as intense/special/important to them as society deems it to be.
All of these are just examples, but it illustrates the many ways one can interpret this label for themself. If you feel it is a good descriptor of your experiences and you feel comfortable using it for yourself? Go for it! (And welcome to the community <2)
As someone who works to deconstruct the romanticized idea of love, though, I can't help but make a note on the "wanting to be loved" part. (To be clear: this is NOT a jab at you, anon, nor at anyone who might be feeling similar; moreso thoughts and advice you can chew on if you'd like, or ignore if you don't.) In a lot of people's minds, there's a very strong connotation between "love" and "any kind of positive treatment", and as such I think it's worth asking ourselves: what do I mean when I say I want to be loved? Do I want them to feel a certain way about me, to act a certain way around me? What kind of treatment am I expecting of people who say they love me?
Love is a very individual thing, and knowing what you mean by love can help both in figuring out those expectations and in communicating them towards others. It also helps deconstruct the idea that "action made from love = good & action made not of love = bad". People who love you can still hurt you (hence why it's good to know what treatment you want, besides being loved), and people can still act good to you without love being a motivating factor behind it.
I hope this helps!
#loveless#loveless aro#loveless aromantic#loveless aplatonic#loveless apl#loveless ace#loveless aspec#aspec#aromantic#asexual#aplatonic#arospec#aplspec#queer stuff
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i used to freehand comics all the time as a child and since the part i liked was the drawing part i would just draw panel after panel because i didn't want to stop drawing to think about icky icky words, plus the story TOTALLY still made perfect sense! to me! and noone else, but 'whoooo caaaaares omgggg its not like comics and sequantial art are a communicative meeediummmm lmaoooooo'. i spent my entire childhood telling myself stuff like "oh pfft I know this story by heart- ill SIMPLY remember the dialogue and write it later" ...and. I can't help but admire baby maiora's (call that a minora ba tm tsk) fucking audacity? hubris? confident wrongness? kid couldn't even remember to finish the comics in the first place? INCREDIBLE levels of unearned self assurance, wish that were me, genuinely- what an icon!!! anyway i think i have forever cursed myself
#maiora garrulates#the maiora overthinks the process of writing dialogue saga continues!!!!!!!#im so tired. i have been overthinking this shit in circles i have not been making any progress in any which way lmao!#im bitching and moaning for funsies this is not that serious in the Grand Scheme Of Things i just wanna improve at my fav thing#and ❤️ Unfortunately ❤️ my favorite thing in the world involves learning MY MOST HATED *NEMESIS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! verbal communication. ew#words are fun! i LOVE words! toys!!!!! im using words right now and i didn't combust!!!!! wow look at that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#putting words in SEQUENCE? multiple times?? filtering THOUGHTS into SENTENCES???? sentences that a character would or wouldn't SAY???#AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER CHARACTER SOMETIMES???? AND THAT BITCH ALSO HAS THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS????? AND THEY ALL HAVE PERSONAL IDIOLECTS#AND TONES THAT S U P P O S E D L Y ARE IMPLICATED BY MANNERISMS AND VERBAL HABITS AND CIRCUMSTANCES (AND THERE'S WRONG ANSWERS! ALSO!!)#AND THEY'RE IN A CONTEXT!! AND THEY'RE INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AND INFLUENCING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE CONVERSATION COULD VARY GIVEN ENERGY LEVELS WHETER OR NOT SOMEONE'S FOOT IS FALLING ASLEEP THE F U C K I N G WEATHER#“oh dialogue is easy just say it out loud to yourself until it 'sounds normal' ^^”#screaming crying throwing up NONE OF THIS IS INTUITIVE TO MEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!#ok dramatics over its out of my system! for now!!!#this is all easily explained bc i just. draw a lot more than i talk to people. so like. OBVIOUSLY i have more practice drawing#so drawing comes natural! talking does not! subsequently dialogue is Hard! No FUCKING Shit Sherlock!!!!! (affectionate)#so yeah. im using y'all (the tumblr void) as practice! hi!!! words at you!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah thanks for baring with me while passing by my corner of the internet#i do love self indulgence this is fun check out my navel gazing actually no do not look at my belly button#anyway i just think this is mildly interesting. some of my writer buds have the same “not good enough” allergy towards visuals#but they use it to be mean2me >:( same bitch that “omg i cant i suck at drawing i can't do this-” does the “uhm. just write? lol.” 2 meeee#we could have peace and love on planet earth and a common experience and yet you KICK miette for being bad at words!!!1!!! </3 heartbreak!!#what the fuck was i talking about even#oh yeah. perfectionism within creatives i guess. LMAO JK i am talking about NOTHIN!!!!G i am just putting Words Out Here ehehehehehe#its practice >;)c#all this bc ive been doodling comics for myself again and im V!! PROUD OF THE ART!!!! wanna share- but DIALOGUE!*⚡sfx!!*....... so! options#a) leaving it blank. no there are NO microphones in the budget. b) leaving blank *balloons* so that the Rythm is there. implied convo!!!#c) ...doing it badly. (tragic)(heartwrenching)(teeny tiny bruise 2 the ego) *dramatic single tear cleches fists * its the only way.........#...we shall see! literally none of this is all that serious i am procrastinating!! <3 playing with my tuoys!!!!!!!! silly time!!!#/all lh! am reaching 30 tags so that is all for THIS episode of the maiora bitches about dialogue saga thank you for joining me!!okilyBuhBY
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Idk if it’s because of how I’ve curated my feed but I rarely see people shitting on Christine. Any E/C space I’m in is mostly about centering Christine and her satisfaction.
That said, I feel the constant need to warn people that “If you like Erik and Christine as a couple, remember not to have that kind of relationship IRL” is kind of annoying. I get the intention, but people, including young people, aren’t stupid and don’t need constant reminders to not be inspired by their toxic faves.
Like yes girl, I know the Phantom is not a real man. I wish a wealthy, nerdy, musically talented, intelligent old man that lived underground and wanted to help me with my music career was real. But he’s not, so I’m gonna indulge in fiction.
Bless the rest of y’all that get involve in the discourse though. Honestly, could not be me.
#christine daae#phantom of the opera#erik/christine#like do you know how ridiculous it was to be 18 and hearing ppl be like ‘oh you’ll know why Entrapdaks bad when you’re older’#babes its been almost 6 years and they’re still one of the strongest relationships out of the show#i wonder if its more tied to r/c and e/c discourse which 🤷♀️#jokes on them I like when all three of them get together#But yeah I rarely come across thosse ‘Christine was wrong for not picking Erik’ posts unless it was like teenagers on TikTok#Which I don’t take seriously at all#as a former teen on the internet#because most of the time you grow out of it#anyway anytime I got reprimanded for shipping something as a kid it just made me want to indulge in it more#and it made me feel like I was being treated like a toddler#by older people who’d be so up in arms about this one ship while defending another that was equally if not more problematic#my hot take is that in most cases ships aren’t really problematic#its more based on your personal tastes and experiences shaping your view of relationships in media
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I would love to listen to your podcast (if you wanna have one) about anything, but something about languages intrigues me. Please, tell me more : )
had to think for a second about what this was about I'm guessing it's my Nopony In This Country Is Pronouncing Przewalski Correctly and now listen..... I have no more to tell you because the like. Concept of languages and within that phonology (the study of the patterns of sounds in a language and across languages) is so wide you wouldn't have enough of a life to say everything about it. Unless you got one thing in mind. But I'm Flattered. Idk if I'd be much of a podcast guy I love visual stimuli. shan't lie I've had for months the idea to do a. Franco-Cantabrian Archeological iceberg... with shit like....... Fontainebleau "water breaking" carving... the Réseau Clastres Only Know Depiction Of [Animal]..... stuff of the sort. but oh well. FLATTERED.... maybe one day. Podcast ideas anyone.
#every few months someone in the patho fandom whos been there a while seems to realize the KH of Khatange or Khodo Khara or even Burakh is#not pronounced K but instead HH and idk if thats because i had the game in russian audio or because i spent hours on the different#Steppe Language pages but im always surprised this is new to some people. like well yeah its the x letter. mostly i dont understand like#not checking the pronounciation if youre unsure. the russian x is not hard to find audio from. its a little like youtubers who go “im not#even gonna try to pronounce this one XD''. but also im glad more people get hashtag aware because i think phonology is such a fantastic#thing to be interested in so. yayyyy.#it just kinda sometimes feels like. A great sense of incuriosity and lack of drive to learn. possibly from fear at a new foreign language.#but above all I'm truly glad more people are hashtag realizing hashtag finding it because truly with the internet pronounciation info#has never been so easy to find. even in english resources. godspeed you!!!!Language learner. Etc.#the wiki has every name (of characters + of places) and every steppe word written in both latin & cyrillic letters by the way that way you#can find what the cyrillic letter of a sound youre unsure of looks like and look it up :D it helped me a lot when i had to find more words#for ATA. good times#tldr it just makes sense To Me when confronted to a phoneme/sound youre unsure the pronounciation of to like. immediately look it up.#so im kinda baffled that ppl may go months being unsure. its not like cyrillic is like. hard to parse its as straightforward as other stuff#ring ring (answers)#anonymous#meiri podcast guy when after all. look at all that yapping
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I have a longing to be understood more than anything else i think
#someone very recently acknowledged something that usually goes unseen and it wasn't even that great of an acknowledgement but ive just been#staring at the messages every once in a while. its great. not really i sort of feel like a real weirdo#im very lonely. i cant say why but let it be known that i am very lonely#ok i have a question to those who lie their eyes upon this post: tell me what you know about me please?#so much lies in my social perception and i am just. not being perceived. at all. darn#i have a lot to cry about but morally i dont think i should-- specifics would mean being mean to the people i love#talking to anyone anymore just makes me feel horrible. doing anything anymore makes me feel horrible..tmbg has my back though ill live for#another.week or a few. and then my birthday will happen and rhen um#.Well. it sucks that sucks man. i dont want to disclose my age but to elaborate on why ACTUALLY HOLD ON#the thing i am about to say is not true; it is a metaphorical thing: it is my 21st birthday soon.#i decided that i wouldnt live past this age around 5 years ago and the only reason ive lived five years is being killed this year. i dont#think every thing ive been desperately clinging on to for the past 2 (?) years can keep me alive past then..i think im going to die. i have#to#NO MORE BEING A DOWNER#fox (vulpes vulpes) on the Internet for the first time#okay maybe a little more..i dont know who im talking to in this post. my friends do not read my tumblr and. i dont know anyone else.really.#uh#I'm listen to tmbg right now i love them#hey reader; i can only think of 3 people who see enough about me to check my blog. so i have separate questions for the each of you.#one of you likes (liked? school came in and i couldnt see your blog much past then; idk if its changed) tmbg. what do you think of The Else?#and uh you there... the guyyy. Google john flansburgh..i dont have a reason to this one ive just not been able to stop thinking about askin#you what you think of him.#um third person..... um#okay theres nothing iecan ask. i do want to apologize to you though: im sorry.#iThis is bullshit#im gonna delete this soon#Um also sorry if my wording here is. really wack. i tend to do that#i dont think anyones going to see this as is always#i think i just like talking to the hypothetical beast. yeah
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also i sent an email i kind of regretted. but also feeling that a large part of that was formed by the very intense emotional state i was in where i was experiencing crazy anxiety and doubts and shame about the way i acted and i felt like everything i wrote in that email was so terrible and also i felt so emotional and so ashamed of it and so sure everyone who knew it woild judge me and know how irrational i am and i could tell logically it probably wouldnt be a big deal but couldnt feel it and like. i feel a bit awkward now but ive fully calmed down and honestly? it was kind of fine actually. its just been a while since ive been UP THERE in that kind of state and i guess it kind of does give you perspective on how your emotional state really affects you so deeply and your perception of things. and like yeah i might retract a few things or be like "eh not mt best move" on some things but realising overall it doesnt matter and i can FEEL that. it is really crazy how many problems exist in your head and you can understand logically its not rational but you just have to bear it for a bit
#but thankfully i calmed down#but damn its been a while since ive been like that#wondering if this also ties into experiences in fhe past and fears about not being taken seriously or being seen as overly emotional#for no reason#that definitely played a big part in things#idk why im oversharing on the internet just felt like maybe i should start postinf all my random thoughts#and experiencing a bit of emotional clarity like after you reach a more balanced state ans go “damn i was strugglin”#but yeah....#ig my fear and anxiety really was#that i would be seen as so overly emotional and illogical and i wouldnt be taken seriously#and also in addition#the fear about thinking i have not communicated well how others acted torwards me and unneccessarily painting them as villians and using#language that was emotional to describe their actions#and my emotions were so strong i couldnt even handle to remember what i had wrote#but honestly i set clear boundaries and have explained my side of the story and although i dont know if i expressed myself perfectly#yes others did upset me and in my opinion act badly no i dont think its a long term issue and yes i will be taking distance from that happe#ing again#sometimes writing down your thoughts really makes them properly observable to you for the first time#and i am thinking about this writing this post
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UP AND DOWN AND UP AND DOWN AND AANYYTHING I DO IS NOOO SINNNNNNNN !!!!
#SOOOO LET THE CHAOSS BEGINNN !!!!!#kam bol vishu#HELP ME I JUST REMEMBERED JEVIL EXISTS I LOVE THAT GUY#i love any clowns and jesters learned in japes and tomfoolery honestly#BUT IM LISTENING TO MAN ON THE INTERNETS WORLD REVOLVING COVER#AND I STILL THINK ITS AWESOME YEARS LATER#well i. don’t know how many years it’s been and saying that makes it sound like a while#NEVERMIND IT WAS FIVE YEARS AGO WHAT THE FUCK ?????#so um. yeah still in awe over how bro voiced like half of not more of the characters#INCLUDING JEVIL#and churned out 6 songs for the first chapter in record time. what a g#anyways i have a habit of rambling in tags and i’ve had to cut down what i say#because i’m prone to reach character and tag limits LMAO#SO YEAH#THANKS FOR READING THIS FAR IF YOU DID AND REMEMBER I LOVE YOU
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im back on my 'never shutting up about animatics i cant make' bullshit but like, orv and changgwi by ahn ye eun anyone
#i think this is like the third time im talking about this song on my blog but consider: its REALLY GOOD#ive seen many wildly different translations of this song (both english and chinese bc this song went a bit viral on cn internet a while bac#so yknow. not great. cuz i cant speak korean. but anyway#i call it the evil spirit tricks you into getting eaten by a tiger song but like idk i feel like some of the lines work rly well#got introduced to this song via absolutely incredible arknights chongyue animatic on bb so yknow#add this to the pile of 'potential animatic songs that also constantly make me think of other (better) animatics'#oh but thanks to that animatic for the idea of every time the lyrics go 'come lets dance' the visuals is just a fight scene LMAO#idk im just constantly coming up with new animatic ideas because the longer its been since i finished my last one the more i realise how#god AWFUL it is like idk if other people get this but i sometimes get youtube videos with like 200 views recommended to me for no reason#and a while back i was looking for like. an ado song or something and i got my own animatic as a sidebar recommendation???#like youtube what the fuck? anyway yeah my god its really not good#im not like. blaming my past self for it necessarily i planned that with the editing power of IMOVIE in mind thats why it looks Like That#but my god i want to make a new one so bad just to prove that i can make something better#like i got capcut now i can actually fucking edit.#asto speaks#orv
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what this is teaching me is that im funnier and more correct and i should make more posts
#i dont original post anymore cause i used to liveblog my college lessons on here and like..... look im all for internet preservation but if#its from 2020 and i find it again im deleting that shit sorry#but yeah doing that for like a year and a half and then experiencing the clarity of march-may 2021 made me go Jesus Christ#I Do Not Want To Live Like This#and proceeded to just not make original posts that weren't 'art' or 'silly image i made'#also all the posts of mine that have got a lot of notes in a short amount of time in the past couple years have been shit i thought of#between the hours of 12 and 4am#good lord a tag rant havent done one of these in a while#i feel the need to be presentable on here when i make original posts because of the above and also people follow me on here?#but i'm trying to adopt the whole You're In My House; Bitch thing
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Snap you are the king of sexy funny back when you did Yamtien just goes to show you have a talent for humor and cheesecake.
there's something about the title 'king of sexy funny' that's really tickling me thank you so much anon ill take that crown with honor
#snap chats#please 'king of sexy funny back' was my fathers name#the joke is that my dad would Nonstop play Sexy Back in the car every day he drove me to school. also hes funny.#which was every day while i was in elementary. and then he and my mom got into the Theyre Practically Divorced fight#and then Love The Way You Lie was added to the playlist theyre filipino they dont believe in divorce yk the works#not even a fight my dad just finally called her out.... anyways...#thats a dusty as hell crown i havent drawn yamtien in literal years#OH YEAH I DID DO SEXY HUMOR I GUESS I REMEMBER SOME OF MY COMICS BEING SUSPECT AS HELL#but of course... need the funny....#im a different man now. i havent done humor like that In Literal Years 2x#like truly the last time i did that WAS those comics#what even was the last sexy or sexy/funny thing i drew...... its just been family sitcoms in my brain for months now....#checking my folders hang on OH JO yeah.#ASIDE FROM THAT THO i really dont do anything. Saucy anymore#someone remind me to delete that actually ive been meaning to go on an art purge but i keep getting side tracked#not a MAJOR one just ones that keep bothering me#ik on the internet eveything is forever but id like to scroll through my own blog without getting flashbanged by stuff i dont like anymore#ive been meaning to delete some ao3 fics too but again... keep getting sidetracked...#THIS TAG RAMBLE IS SO DAMN LONG IM SO SORRY utterly off track.
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#okay. i can handle this:#...i just really wish it wasnt so hard to do everything for me. like. ive spent years of my childhood molding myself for the sake of others#and what for? now that im an adult im just trying to completely remove the trauma i experienced as a kid.#and i just look back on all these things that hurt me and think#idk. theres not much to be done. in a way its a relief being able to pinpoint#diary#personal#i was gonna say i wish my mood was more stable but thats not quite right.#i guess i moreso wished i was a bit more resiliant. i wish that not every little thing hurt#or just. i wish i could handle the stressors of life a bit more easily. but i cant.#idk. its been a really rough week to be entirely honest. and then i just have little moments like these#where things sorta feel like they just fall into place. where i feel like i was just a kid. i didnt really understandokay im acting like thi#but really in the end it doesnt stop it for me? everything still hurts so much.#and its still hard to know all the things i need to deal with and do.#and honesty i know i cant handle the stresses that come with adult life. i cant even support myself really#i fully depend on my parents for any and all basic necessities.#i can pay for my health insurance yeah. but thats about it?#i could potentially pay for my phone and maybe other basic necessities. but in practice i cant.#the process of setting these things up is damn near impossible for me.#honestly. i think that while i enjoy the internet and such sometimes this is the worst time for me to exist#bc i just. am constantly stressed with so many things bc of it. and theres not much to be done really.#...i hope i can book an appointment with my therapist sooner than later.#at least i have a bunch of stuff i can do to keep myself busy ig...#but really. thats the problem. theres too much to do and its far too stressful.#well. at least ill be able to play with some things ig. idk. i have a new planner im excited about.#i like planning. i miss studying. i hate working. im tired of only having the options of working out or being in pain.#im just so tired of it all.#that appointment i had with the specialist sorta really made me realize. oh shit. this is my life now and im fucked.#like. i can take anti-inflammatories. but thats it really. my life is just gonna constantly be like this. and im tired.#idk. im gonna go finish my latte.
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hmmm thats a good point and im so tempted and im feeling messy
so, what happened between you and the other hellsite person?
stuff, but billie eilish has that one song about not talking shit on the internet. and I wanna be cool like that
#granted yes its been 3 months and I am dating someone else who is actually mature and loyal#and someone I could actually build an adult and healthy life with#and someone who respects me enough to be genuine and not say they love me and are obsessed with me#while simultaneously constantly looking for and online fucking others#and who wouldn’t continue to have multiple relationships with other for 6 months and would brag about it while I had no idea#and someone who actually takes accountability for and works on her own feelings and emotions and mental health issues#and doesnt rely soley on me for emotional support even tho I said thats not healthy#and begged her to work with her therapist or take initiative to work on her own issues bc l cant do it for her#even tho I did try for months and gave so much effort I became mentally exhausted and was just constantly sad and worried#and so yeah I do have hope and excitement for the future for the first time in forever#and do legit feel like ive gotten my spark back and I didnt even know it was gone#anyways#but I wont talk shit on the internet#but also I feel like I deserve to be angry and act immature and dumb about this bc it still affects me and probably always will#and this makes no sense and is nonsense anyway#but it feels like fall outside finally and I feel sleepy and messy#and its in the tags and on my other blog so its not canon ofc#the curators bullshit#hellsite hall of fame curators bullshit
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im not gonna say you cant use the n word w a hard r on a almost fully anonymous tumblr account where you claim to be black-
I will say that it makes you 100% more suspicious and worth keeping an eye out on you bc usually its neo nazis pretending to be black that spam saying the n word w an r and use tumblrs weird trust for almost fully anonymous accounts to their advantage to get away w it
you can say it, but, if you Are a neo nazi pretending to be black, I will say, you're not doing a good job of convincing me rn that you actually are.
#got too excited you could get away w saying it ey?#inb4 'PeOpLe aLwAyS DeMaNd yOu GiVe YoUr LiFe sToRy-' bs- babe--- i wouldn't have cared or even noticed or even remarked on it#if you said it w an a. its more believable at least. lmao.#and I say bs bc ik its likely a neo nazi and ik they know that we say that a lot on tumblr- that ppl dont owe u every detail of their life#- and ik a neo nazis one of the least trustworthy people in the world so ofc they would abuse that line to get away w saying the n word#w a hard r around a bunch of progressives who have so little info about you that they dont know if they get the right to feel uncomfortable#when you say it- but personally im not built like that and i will tell you rn im uncomfortable w you saying it and idc what excuse you give#doesnt mean you hafta do whatever i say. just means I actually take a stance on shit unlike a lot of easily manipulated tumblr users.#i mean come on. its a neo nazis wet dream to run around a progressive (well. given recent events- supposedly progressive) space#and say slurs unchecked by said progressives. its one of their favorite ways of having you shut up. even if it is all done in secrecy#like the cowardly bitch made bitch built bitches they are. theyd never do it off anon or with their face exposed.#they simply cant take the heat. so the only way this type of person can feel like they've won is when they do manipulative shit like this i#secret. which is just so so sad. this is how ik the nazis are gonna lose. you're too much of a cowardly bitch to say it in front of#progressives with your whole chest.#why're you so scared? afraid you might be outnumbered? afraid you might not win as many ppl over as you think you will?#i mean cmon nows the perfect time to take the mask off right? perfect time to radicalize leftists? surely there shouldnt be#an issue waving your red flag huh? come on now. dont be shy. why are you scared? afraid you might reveal to the leftists you're#trying to indoctrinate that you're actually a hateful pos? and that you've been manipulating them to hate jewish ppl?#nah you're right joshua tyler stevenson it's probably a better idea to hide in the shadows like a bitch.#you're black on the notoriously white website? yeah. ok#i mean im sure theres just so many black ppl just dying to be here. thats why most black ppl ik hate this site 😒 for sure dawg i believe u#i mean ig if there were ever a place for a black nationalist to roam unchecked it'd be here though... generally they stick to twitter ime#its just hard to believe when I seldom see black ppl on here to begin w and most of the ones I do see are just like. normal people#w/o weird fucked beliefs. and if you are black- i think its really interesting that the black ppl with black nationalist beliefs almost#never show their faces in any capacity ever while other normal black ppl do. what are you scared of? afraid ppl irl will recognize u#and laugh?? or is it that... you're not actually a black person......... so far professor flowers is the only internet black nationalist#who's dared to show their face that ik of.
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Crazy how a couple of years ago when the dark times from 2016 to 2018 of the dsp fandom vs the dsp critical blogs fandom wars was around, the same anti that used to "call" me out for shipping a height gap pairing spreading misinfo saying im a p word and harassed/send hate other ppl in the dsp fandom alongside the other dsp critical blogs is somehow still an anti and still acts like an anti at the age of 25. That's sad.
#delete later#idk why this one anti just suddenly appeared on my mind. i decided to look for a bit to see if they were still around on the internet#turns out they were. just under more new usernames#its a good thing they arent harassing dsp fans anymore but good fucking lord this person STILL have not changed#i took a peek at their blogs and yiiikessssssss#and the fact they have “dsp fans should be put down inhumanely idc” in their dni ofc#the fact that its been what 8 years and this person is still an anti and uses keel yor selfs and d word to other ppl like its candy. christ#also bravo to twitter for suspending them because good lord theyre such a fucking dangerous person to be around#to make matters worse theyre like what 3 years older than me?#im just discovering that now thats ALSO even more sadder lol#and since i find out about their age that literally means they technically started hate drama against me who was#still a minor during highschool and they were an adult at the time. huge fucking yikes holy shit#they also never apologized for all the things they done either. all i remembered was the dsp fandom stood up for everyone#that got shitted on including me and the dsp crit blogs backed down. they stayed around for a while but then slowly deactivated#and yeah im just glad the dsp crit blogs died off i never liked them#but yeah it kinda. makes me mad they never apologized or feel bad for what they did in the past. and theyre out here under new username#and still have a anti puritan mindset to this day. very sad
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i love these tags this person is so right
actually, can you imagine if dave was raised by B1 roxy?
i wanna get into this actually
(ok i had to spend a few hours rewriting this because IT DIDNT FUCKING SAVE AFTER FIVE HOURS OF WRITING WHEN MY COMPUTER UPDATED WHILE I WAS AFK so it would mean a lot to show this post some appreciation. i LOVEEE hearing what other people have to say)
even though these things mom does are presented in an extravagant, kitsch, jokey way, her intentions always came from a place of sincerity. she is simply Funnie
but rose reads too far into it and assumes things that aren't there, that her mother is passive-aggressively feigning interest in rose's interests simply because the things she does are so extra. "why do all of this if not to mock me"
im telling you right now if dave lived in this household he wouldn't assume antagonism, he'd go,
don’t forget who LITERALLY patented tangible jpeg artifacts as their post-scratch adult self and scattered shitty scummed up statue of liberties all over the planet. theres no way some of that overboard artful shit wasnt post-ironic / circling back around to genuine funny sincerity
dave's natural state is funny sincerity like roxy. he's had the natural capacity for this type of humor from the start and this is the direction he goes towards when he grows out of his brother's shadow by the end of the comic. dave and roxy share an earnest “so bad its good” type of humor
(lots more under the cut; the length of this meta analysis just got unwieldly with all the pictures and whatnot)
despite the alcoholism, roxy is a supportive mother. she's not the ideal guardian but hells of a lot more supportive of her kid than bro is. if she knew dave's interests she would totally indulge in them with some over the top silly goofy haha shit as a genuine gesture simply because she loves him
rose isn't too keen on it though. but she is more similar to dirk in her natural state of thinking of overthinking shit and assuming the worst, like the tags said
and yes dave got the sweet cuddly yet sometimes backhanded ouppy gene from roxy, probably even moreso lol
roxy's even said rose "sounds like girl dirk"
side tangent here, but this is something i wanna talk about.
i dont think bro should ever be in custody of children ever but if theres anyone who would be up to the task it's rose probably. i know she'd be able to keep up with him. not only does she have a defined personality (dave is more malleable and absorbs his environment like a sponge), if anyone can pick apart B1 dirk's batshit brain and probably be right on the money it's her. lil cal has been pumping patriarchal nonsense into bro's head and rose would be able to bring the fucking facts to the table without losing her own and being a living example of a badass little girl. i also don't think bro would try to force masculine roles onto rose like he did with dave, seeing as she is a girl, so she would actually have more of a leg up and get some passes that dave was never afforded. and rose wouldn't stand idly and accept any bullshit; she is no doormat. and i think this would earn bro's respect
but anyway, from this, couldn't we conclude roxy "sounds like girl dave"?
yeah okay. we havent even gotten into their penchant for funny typos or misspeaks, deliberate or otherwise
so, dave's environment
the sentiment "god you hope you can be as good as your bro at this some day" might have been genuine at the time when he idolized bro but of course he's not able to express that in any sort of sincere fashion because he's in dirk's fucking household. and this level 10 irony shit isnt doing dave any favors
his role models were the Internet and a vague idea of what Bro was like. So he built up his facade based on irony–not the literary definition of irony, as Rose might be quick to point out, but a popular concept of irony based on the idea that things that didn’t make sense actually made sense in some roundabout way. As a master of irony, Dave probably reasoned, he could see in a way other people couldn’t why a world that was scary and didn’t make sense really did make sense, and could therefore convince those people that he was superior to them. And he would wield his knowledge to maintain the appearance of superiority by calling everything ironic and pretending he didn’t care about things that didn’t make sense, and he would use walls of vaguely rhyming words to keep everyone at arm’s length so they wouldn’t discover his insecurities (source)
roxy's style is the embodiment of post-irony. being raised by mom lalonde would be like being raised by joel vinesauce ok
what can i say ….. (getting meta about this actually, hussie got these jpeg wizard wallpapers from a spyware website. link takes some time to load because internet archive)
rose is quick to read post-irony as actually being a joke/insincere, which in bro's case would be true. but i believe dave's natural instinct, outside of the influence of bro, is to read post-irony as genuine, which is exactly how mom serves it. we see this as early as act 3 from him; he understands her motives better than rose does herself:
and in act 6 intermission 2 i think it's pretty clear
but the thing is, it's always genuine from her. dave wouldn't have to second guess it because he's not one to naturally second guess someone's sincerity; that was learned due to his bro being virtually unassailable
there two types of ironies at play here:
seems like a joke, is actually genuine (roxy)
doesnt seem like a joke, is actually a joke (dirk)
you can make the argument that the second is is more psychologically destructive because it makes you question the reality of what is genuine sentiment and what isn't. dave never knew what was genuine and what was irony so he just sort of existed in this sincerity-ironic limbo and always did the opposite of what he genuinely felt on principle even if it always did originate from a genuine place.
"it just a joke bro i was just being ironic i dont actually x" is so much more trust-breaking and psychologically damaging than "wait are you being serious" / "i am being so fucking fr rn davy gravy" / "ok thats actually pretty fucking awesome. giant ass wizard statue" / "RIGHT"
how much about dave would change do you think? his character arc would be completely different for one thing, i think he'd have it good aside from mom's alcohol issues. he'd be left with the sweet and funny parts of him that we see at the end of the comic. the fake coolguy stuff is out, but this remains. this is dave in his element and we see it as early as act 1
he'd probably have no shades growing up in the lalonde residence* either cause those were given to him by bro straight out of the crater as an extension of his own cool image. and john gave dave ben stiller’s aviators for his 13th birthday to replace them so he could “spread his wings”
dave said he was wearing them for the ironies but i kind of doubt it. maybe post-irony but there was some reacharound to it being genuine because dave never put those pointy anime shades on his face again.
*though... it’s kind of hard to imagine him without his shades at all? B2 dave still got stiller’s shades from stiller himself so maybe getting them is a universal constant. i can imagine mom getting him them as a birthday gift cause shes pretty wealthy and probably could buy it out in an auction. but also itd be cool if john still gave him it as a gift
dave is actually a lot more genuine and easy to read than he lets on even when grappling with his upbringing with B1 dirk (again, see this post). this can be seen all throughout he comic but a good example is the evolution of thoughts about his interest in the preserved dead things in his room:
if B1 roxy was dave's guardian he probably WOULD have pursued paleontology because she wouldve indulged him in it and probably find it cool and worthwhile to pursue, instead of allowing dave to flounder under ironic detachment, being poisoned by irony to the point of gaslighting himself into believing he doesnt actually believe he thinks this shit is cool. even if it was indulged in this such a way; a superficially kitsch and ironic appearing presentation, it comes from a genuine place and inspires genuine interest. just read the comments.
basically, i think if B1 roxy raised dave, their relationship would have a surface level appearance of being bizarre or over-the-top but they’d have an unsaid mutual understanding that it’s completely in earnest and just build on each other's funny and absurd gestures of affection. rather than seeing it as one-upping each other, it'd more like collaboration of some silly bullshit that you take a step back and look at full and just say, "fucking incredible"
speaking of paleontology, mom had the proto-ectobiology lab. maybe they'd be able to use the equipment to appearify paradox ghost imprints of the dead shit to create paradox clones of things from the cambrian era??? sounds like a fun mother son bonding activity. and theyd actually put the sciencey shit in the household to use
oh god i know exactly the kinds of music shed listen too also growing up as a teen in the 80s. she on that (post)-punk/art rock/new wave/new romantic mtv stuff. XTC shit fr. this is a B-52S HOUSEHOLD. maybe the associates for the campy melodramatic flair. so he gets to keep the record on his shirt cause he is an enjoyer of the shit in her vinyl collection. dave would still gravitate towards musical expression and music itself but of more variety outside of just rap, with an 80s-90s, even 70s flavor due to mom’s influence. see this for perhaps a glimpse. she probably visited new york city a lot for business trips and because the music scene was cool as hell around that time, imports came straight from jfk airport, she probably got in on that a bit and have remnants in the form of vinyls and cassettes. in this way she could be distributing void to dave (influencing him with forgotten / presently irrelevant music). now he can REALLY rave about bands none of his friends have heard of. “hey davy grvay watcha listenin to” (he holds up vinyl cover) “omg snakefinger”
btw dave lalonde would look like this to me
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