#like way longer than most people on here
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No one solves ethics here, he's just exposing shit and bouncing people out the only way I can.
#no ethics ever get solved here#like I just readed before entering business because I can't maintain a job for the cost of my life#but yea it's very high risk low reward so if you take shit too much for granted it fucks everything up#because it's a very saturated market#people who try to make it look easy get their ass sorted out by competitors all the fucking time#that's exactly why you play n i c e with competitors because if they decide they don't and decide it's over for you then bye 😘#the trick is to play like there's no competition and not like as if you master that shit in the shhshh within minutes#no one likes that no oooone#but the thing is I'm not exactly even secretive about it so there's the enabling factor#because i went in this with no expectations and liked it#and the weird thing is that it felt less cringe than maintaining an actual job#it's my own decision but#i've done that shit for rather a very long time so anyways#like way longer than most people on here
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the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.
capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.
now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.
and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.
and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.
and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".
it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"
#this was much longer i had to cut it down for legibility#but i do want to say i am aware this post doesnt touch on human rights violations as a result of fast fashion#that is because it deserves its own post with a completely different tone#i am an environmental educator#so that's what i know the most about. it wouldn't be appropriate of me to mention off-hand the real and legitimate suffering#that people are going through#without doing my research and providing real ways to help#this is a vent post about a thing i'm watching happen; not a call to action. it would be INCREDIBLY demeaning#to all those affected by the fast fashion industry to pretend that a post like this could speak to their suffering#unfortunately one of the horrible things about latestage capitalism as an activist is that SO many things are linked to this#and i WANT to talk about all of them but it would be a book in its own right. in fact there ARE books about each level of this#and i encourage you to seek them out and read them!!! i am not an expert on that i am just a person on tumblr doing my favorite activity#(complaining)#and it's like - this is the individual versus the industry problem again right because im blaming myself#for being an expert on environmental disaster (which is fucking important) but not knowing EVERYTHING about fast fashion#i'm blaming myself for not covering the many layers of this incredibly complicated problem im pointing out#rather than being like. yeah so actually the fault here lies with the billion dollar industries actually.#my failure to be able to condense an incredibly immense problem that is BOOK-LENGTH into a single text post that i post for free#is not in ANY fucking way the same amount of harm as. you know. the ACTUAL COMPANIES doing this ACTUAL THING for ACTUAL MONEY.#anyway im gonna go donate money while i'm thinking about it. maybe you can too. we can both just agree - well i fuckin tried didn't i#which is more than their CEOs can say
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It is kinda funny seeing people talk about Seungmin lately because he definitely has gotten more bold and confident for sure. He's also just getting opportunities to be perceived as an individual on his own as well for the first time in a while but it's still jarring to see people be like Aw he was always such a quiet goodie two shoes little nerd and it's like...... he was the one to leave and seek out his own vocal coach and blatantly talk about it, which of course lead to I.N and Lee Know also doing the same, he was the one to go on bubble and tell off sasaengs who used to camp outside their old dorm for invading members privacy but also because it effected other residents and staff at the complex, something that i'm certain upper management wouldnt have been happy about, and he wasn't curt or nice about it either. like he's never actually been a wallflower, he's always had a pretty strong backbone and seems to stick to his principals, its not really new.
#even silly shit like bringing up drinking even tho staff has clearly told him not too#like yeah its silly but its still sticking to his guns of being like we arent actually children anymore thanks#the food thing too like in an old 2 kids room he said something about not being able to eat on his bday bc they were filming so evidently#there was a moment in time when he caved to the shitty diet obsession kpop had but ever since hes never really said anything like it again#instead hes telling everyone to eat well and reminding people to have dinner or lunch every other day#even the comment about growing his hair out but then being like lol the stylist probably wont like me saying that or whatever#and like the yeah im going to the gym but im not lifting. dont expect me to bulk up. im doing it for stamina<< that made me cackle#bc i did see people on twt being like but what if seungmin got buff tho omg hed be so hot 🥺 Well him bein buff isnt what this is about#so he went and made sure people were realistic. not everyone needs to be noticeably cut yk#idk maybe bc i watched most all the skz content all the way through#and now i go back and gif stuff i notice patterns more easily than if youve been here for longer and havent watched older stuff#for a while- maybe? idk its just funny but i also see takes a lot and have to stop myself from going No <3#anyway this is my obligatory insane ksm tangent of the week. see you in 5 minutes.#🐶
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Understandably So no one mentions charles when talking about the Logan movie and again Understandably So This Aint Bout Him however i do confess that as someone who had never seen Logan until like. a month ago when i was binging all the movies and without knowing a single thing about it aside from laura i cant lie i was in fact jumpscared by him being there. especially for at least like 3/4s of the movie
#xmen#logan movie#snap chats#i be ramblin today hello ...#it was a pleasant jumpscare. yk until he died. after realizing he committed atrocities by accident 😭😭💀 OLD MAN NOOO#but no please LIKE I READ THE DESCRIPTION WHEN GOING TO WATCH RIGHT#AND I WAS JUST THINKING 'oh he'll probably be here for like twenty minutes. wdym he's here for way longer than that'#i THINK years ago i REMEMBER seeing a screenshot of the hotel bit with laura and charles but again that was years ago#and i might be tricking myself maybe its a false memory jealvvelka either way i just know they were cute :(#point is he was here for. i cant even say So Little cause again He Was Here For An Hour And Thirty Minutes Out Of Two Hours#and lets be clear 'snap has your brain molded that much you know exactly how much screen time charles gets in the movies'#girl no not yet i only know exactly when he punches his clock cause i had to keep restarting the movie cause it kept pausing vjAELKAJE#and it just so happened to struggle literally like. ten minutes after he dies- like when logan was dealing with x24 THAT part#so rude for that.. anyway I Repeat i miss charles and laura bein cute :(#it wasnt a lot but it was just sweet.. i always like how charles always got that Professor in his soul with these movies#like in dofp when logan's losing it after. getting future ptsd jvALKVLAJ??K charles is there to ground him#despite being. Like That vjeaLKj like sir please ily. i will accept the Youre On Acid answer youre trying your best#and then with THIS movie evidently charles is having. the worst time upstairs#but he's still super sweet with laura like oh stop you grandpa im gonna throw up#and to STRESS. they were EVIL about that wholesome dinner bit like :((( oh to see the fam happy and safe again :(((#like im throwing up frankly. people were right this movie IS sad i underestimated their assessment 😭#to lighten the mood in my heart. charles really do be an old man in this movie hes such a menace to logan JELKAK#god. Most Normal X-Men Movie Watcher Focuses On Professor X During The Movie About Logan VEJLKJA#ok im done. sorry i just keep replayin that bit in my head where theyre in the car and logans just 'Did You Take Your Meds SHOW'#like pelase. jaeRLKEaj ok im gonna try drawing i looked at my wall long enough and i think i can draw something
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hey sorry i wanna talk some more about no one mourns the wicked.
when glinda's introduced, her first celebratory lines slide into a question:
Isn't it nice to know that good will conquer evil, the truth we all believe'll by and by outlive a lie for you and - [I]?
and in a song full of double meanings, glinda isn't asking that question (only) to the ozians. she's asking it to elphaba, who has always been that other half of "you and i." even though glinda has promised not to reveal the truth, she's still hoping that it will come to light someday for her and elphaba. and it's also a heartbreaking call-forward to defying gravity, because just like that moment where glinda almost gets on the broom, there can't be a "you and i" here--it's cut off by the world they exist in.
#ready for a tag ramble?#it's interesting that by the end of the story glinda and elphaba's values#are the most aligned they've ever been#glinda cares about affecting real change#and elphaba understands you need people and perception in order to do that#by the end the people they've changed into COULD HAVE worked together#i think end-of-story glinda could have gotten on the broom#and i think end-of-story elphaba would have at least reached out for help#but the damage has been done and their personas cemented in the eyes of oz#so that's no longer an option#it's what irks me about fiyero as a love interest#not necessarily as a flaw in the writing but just on a personal level#that i never feel he really understands elphaba's values even as he supports them#and he lacks the same tension between loving his home and being ostracized from it that glinda and elphaba have#(even though he SHOULD have it because he arcs the exact same way as glinda but faster)#(not to mention all the stuff they could have pulled with him being from winkie/the vinkus)#anyway and also i understand that people are coming to this realization genuinely and independently#and that i also had the moment where i saw the double meaning and went OH#but nomtw is not JUST about glinda calling herself wicked#there's also grief#and hope for a better future#and disappointment in the ozians' lack of empathy#and a commentary on how we'd rather label and punish someone wicked#than look at the broader systems that put people into impossible positions#(a commentary that is VERY relevant if the discussion turns solely into#'actually GLINDA was the wicked one and ELPHABA was the good one!')#figured i'd put all this here because i've already ranted like three times#on the villanizing glinda front#so. there it is#wicked
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haha oh no im definitely not at all disturbed by the prevalence of leftists on all platforms who are loudly 'anti-genocide' when it comes to the palestinian cause (and a couple others at best :3c) yet the only time ukraine [ʊkrɐˈjinɐ] leaves their mouths is in critique, in stark comparison to the former or in complaint about their (american) government sending aid.
at first what i saw often was pointing out the differences in western media framing [ukraine vs palestine], and that's fair (until the words and the agenda of western journalists are used to paint, as a whole, ukrainians who have been actively going through genocide as some kind of white supremacists hogging the blanket of global attention when they kinda just want to live and have the rights to their own land, culture, names and families)
but no one is even caring to do that anymore, today bitches just invent metaphorical scenarios and people to get mad at and to throw an entire ethnos away because wahhhh i decided that you care for X but not for Y!!!.... all while doing the exact thing they are condemning. the exact absolute same and they don't even hide it but do lack the self-awareness to realise
#'ohh i saw white people still go out to rally for ukraine' yeah have you considered they are ukrainian or have ukrainian loved ones or uh#simply have humanity in their heart to care about several humanitarian tragedies in the world?#this is both aimed at a post i saw on here and at SEVERAL. MANY. twitterians with a thousand palestine flags all over their accounts spewing#misinformation hate and sometimes straight up russian propaganda tactics because they're this fucking insane#i don't care about sounding nice anymore by the way. i know my heart lies in the right place and i have the capacity to care about more than#one ongoing genocide of indigenous peoples#removed incidents of bad actors having a ukrainian flag on their backpack doing hateful shit does not somehow okay dismissing a genocide you#so vehemently claim to oppose. they are not ukrainians who are getting bombed on the daily for years#i saw a very lovely 🍉🕊️ lady denying holodomor and using literal russian talking points while patting herself on the back for being such#a good person. i saw one of the most popular leftie accs on twitter be actively anti-ukraine and using slurs. luckily we mass reported them#and they're gone#i'm no longer being careful with my words because i don't want to be misconstrued. i know my values go beyond twitter and tumblr#if i catch you in any way undermining the genocide of ukrainians or only bringing it up to point fingers and bitch i am blocking you forever#don't care how far this post might go cuz of ppls questionable use of the search function. and i didn't care to censor anything#like. masks off. just block me if this is your rhetoric
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...So! There are at least two people on tumblr who hate me with absolute loathing 🙃
#By which I mean that I've been on this new account for a few days only and two people have blocked me#I have not interacted with them in that time#and yes they had me blocked on my old account#so... the only explanation is that they regularly check the Silmarillion tag and saw my posts showing up in it?#but like this implies that (a) they remembered my url (which I changed recently?) and pfp (which people sometimes share??) that well#and (b) decided 'block on sight' was the thing to do#and (c) went *on* my blog to find the url of my main and blocked me there#...and that's some level of investment#I did in fact get into a quarell with one of the blogs... nearly two years ago I think#mostly to learn that they're a raging hypocrite (including but not limited to 'you vagueing me is rude but not the other way round)#but that was not the case with the other#anyway yeah I'm probably making more of it than most would because I seem to be the very rare one here to consider blocking a last resort?#but also one of those people clearly vagued that they detest me so apparently that's still the case😅#anyway they're an idiot but I don't like being detested. would prefer a mild dislike#*also the issue we thought on is no longer really a thing but whatever#therese rambles#I don't think this counts as a rant? idk#therese rants#no commiserations needed I can deal with it
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like I have to admit that I still don't actually 100% know what people mean by meta
like I broadly get the idea of it but like the specifics are lost on me
because sometimes I'm just yapping to myself on tumblr.com and people will reblog it like "wot meta" and I'm like "but i'm just talking about stuff what"
and then I see like long ass "meta posts" and I'm like...."this is an essay?"
#idk I never purposely delved into like fandom in that way or in like the fic writing way so things are lost on me#like i will be out here writing essays on shit but like if its longer than a few paragraphs i'm like#approaching it like an essay like I would in fucking college minus strict citations#like most of my writing/analysis knowledge came from academia and not fandom#and it really shows when I don't know what the fuck people are talking about on here half the time
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hello im the same anon as before i just learned about the new attack which was indeed premeditated. i thought the post was talking about what happened with the soccer fans. im very sorry!
tbh i considered ignoring this and obviously do not know who you are anon + i am leaving out the first message i got, because i do not want to drag any other blogs into this:
do not come into my ask box and tell me that i shouldn't reblog xyz's posts because they are a zionist
if the current posting trend on tumblr wasn't so particularly dire i'd use the "woman putting box on shelf meme" with the word zionist on it, but as it stands
i obviously do not vet all blogs in a reblog chain when i agree with the content of a post; i do not mind people coming to my dms/ask box to tell me that someone i reblogged from has posted heinous shit and that i should check whether i want to reblog them
however, that means pointing out that they actually said something specific (e.g. having no compassion for the people in gaza) and not just sending a dm with "btw blog xyz is zionist"
10 times out of 10, the people who contact me like that have first heard of zionism a year ago and have never done any reading beyond the english wiki since then +
any time i have seen posts like that on my dash they weren't even directed at zionists but jewish bloggers talking about the antisemetic bs going down on this website and in general
as for amsterdam:
it boggles my mind (not really) that people cannot comprehend that making fun of dead children in gaza is vile stuff but also doesn't justify people going on a 'jew hunt' in the streets.
i am beyond making presumptions, but i cannot help but feel that the activism in support of palestine by people who message me like this extends to just that - messaging me or others - and then never engaging in actual activism.
it is calling out racism and antisemitism when you encounter it, especially among your peers, giving money to organisations that actually try and provide help to people in gaza, it means calling and writing to politicians to make your voice heard (i've decided to mainly post on tumblr about the antisemitic attacks going on in europe etc. because i feel like some people on here do not want to accept the fact that antisemitic hate crimes are globally on the rise. as for the support for palestine: i do that offline, because i do not believe there is anything helpful i can achieve on this platform).
so, i reblogged that post not just because of the "new" attack, but also because of the attack from the day before.
#ctlyuejie writes#i/p#antisemitism#maybe deleting the additional tags but this is just bonkers#it should be easy to condemn the violence on part of the football fans without justifying ppl in amsterdam explicitely going on a “jew hunt#idk why i have to explain on this website that it is also not acceptable to collectively punish a group of people even if someone wants to#claim they weren't hunting jews but just retaliating against maccabi fans in general#how is this helpful in any way?#not the most fucked up thing but it is indeed exhausting when your own government has bs policies re: israel and palestine (hence me arguin#with politicians and ppl in my own party) but also exhausting that i was only able to join one protest for palestine because all the others#i checked out did chant blatently antisemitic slogans at one point or another#(e.g. i happened to be in the city when there was a protest in my hometown so while i considered joining spontaneously and googled the#organizers they started chants of 'burn down israel')#how is this helpful? does this help end the violence in the region? does this protect palestinians living here? does this help change#the minds of politicians who could actually pressure netanjahu? does this build a broad coalition that could sway public opinion and polici#s?#absolutely not#only made the sister chapter of my party hold a vigil explicitely for the state of israel and doing microaggressions in a groupchat#against a party member from jordan which in turn made me do angry phonecalls#like it is bonkers when it shouldn't be difficult to support palestinians without being antisemetic and support jewish people#without being racist#and i know that like clockwork i will get a message for some fundraiser in my askbox that is plain spam#this got much longer than intended
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u know what i've been thinking about. how the economy expects you to be, right now, at a job you've been at and consistently getting raises in for like, ten years. it's almost like the implication is "well yeah, you'll be able to live off this job in three, five, ten years if you stick with it and grow in the company" which is all fine and dandy, but i kind of need to live right now
#the queen of trash has spoken#rewrote this post six times and it turned into an essay both times and i don't really need it to lol#also thinking about the graphic i saw this morning that said the average spending power of $100 here is $41 compared to the national averag#which i guess? min wage is just over $16 here. but uhhhhhhhh i think my city is one of the most expensive in the state as far as cost of#living goes (not hard since we're the second largest city in a state of three decent sized cities and mostly large towns)#and its just crazy bc i look at my coworkers some of whom haven't been there much longer than me#who have kids and a house and stuff#and i realize oh. their husbands are engineers or lawyers. plus they're probably making more than me because they're team leads or managers#or have been there longer. meanwhile my 25 year old ass is making $20 an hour and my boyfriend is making $18 an hour#both doing highly-specialized work#and like. the idea that in ten years if i last that long both in the company and in this mortal coil#THEN i'll be making a living wage (in today's money)#is like. so wack! considering the fact that people really aren't staying in jobs for very long for various reasons#and for some positions the only way to get a raise is to move to a whole new company#it's just crazy! the fact that a 25 year old with a bachelor's degree can't even afford a fucking APARTMENT.#like everyone should be able to have housing obvs and the obvious solution to this is a universal basic income#but the fact that my experiencce in the economy is so different from my brothers (who is seven years older than me) and COMPLETELY#unrecognizable to that of my parents when they were my age. like i know billionaires are totally disconnected from reality#but in what universe is this a successful economy? /rq i know the answer i promise
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Guys. Have y'all ever had onion soup? Because I need to talk about it.
Onion soup is epic. Onions themselves are epic. They taste good fried/caramelized and it's so good. It pairs well with ANYTHING. And sometimes raw onions also just pack that punch you need in certain dishes and it's so good.
And then you're telling me it was put in SOUP??
LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN THIS SHIT????
It's food heaven imo.
It's onions(one of the few foods that go good with everything and can be eaten at any time) in BROTH with all the other good stuff AND it's french(idk why I put that but french food has the impression of being fancy to me) AND it's paired with cheese and goes epic with baguette slices.
Onion soup is epic
I rest my case
#ok actually not yet i havent said enough so in the tags here we go#you can also dip just about anything in onion soup. not just bread. and itll be good#you can add all kinds of stuff in it to adjust to your own taste and its technically still onion soup if theres lost of onion in it#it can be adjusted to different textures in the same way#and you can add as much or as little other stuff#and i swear theres not been a single person ive met whos like “yeah i DONT like onion soup.”#(or maybe i just havent asked enough people)#but personally its a favourite of mine#i could have onion soup with mashed potatoes anytime#the most epic combo#my love for potatoes will have to wa8t another day for a rant#because its much much longer rant than onion soup and much much more passionate#(i really need to stop or else ill never manage to post this)
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You know what, joining that Discord show club was a great idea, like half of my favourite PKC folks are there. And is there anything more wholesome than someone going '1!! hey, I remember that dog!! she's adorable, I'm glad she's doing well!' about a little pixel friend they made for you years ago?
#someone also said they liked one of my older petz that I got from a member of the Polish Petz community back in the day#and we went on to reminiscent about how the community used to be back then#honestly? in a way that talk is the closest thing I'll ever get to closure in regards to what happened with the PKC#and I think that with that I can actually try and move on#even though it's pretty damn tough when a niche site that's been around since you were born just...... falls apart due to technical issues#but I've done it before. SHiR felt like it would never go away too after all#and I was there with PTI practically since the very beginning and until the very end#anyways the Petz community is still so vibrant and cool#it hurts but it'll heal. It somehow hurts way more now that I'm an adult though.#maybe because now the Polish Petz community basically /has/ no home? and I've known some of those people since I was 11?#still.... all good things must come an end and I can accept it. I feel I'm slowly getting closer to that point.#maybe I'll slowly warm up to the concept of using my RKC account ahahaha.... the RKC people were always really nice after all#the Petz community at large won't die anytime soon I don't think. Most of us have been here for at least 10 years after all.#a huge chunk of them for 20+ years#again. some people have been here longer than I've been alive#it's not something that can entirely disappear
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Holy fuck, all of your takes about homosexuality are DOGSHIT today, kiddos. Has “queer” in-fighting fully circled back around to become pure homophobia? It’s more likely than you think!
#i just saw a post that said ‘it’s understandable and justified to distrust normie cis gays and lesbians’#to be fair I think they’re probably referring to right-wing gays but the post didn’t actually say that and I think there’s a reason why#because these fuckin dipshits actually think that homosexuality is some kind of regressive/ non-radical ‘identity’#they think that individual identity is where the sex & gender revolution takes place#that’s why they prioritize micro-labels and ‘queer’ identities so much#because most of them aren’t gay and don’t have gay sex or same-sex attraction#they just want to be the most radical person in the room#so they pretend like their personal nuances of gender are purely individual and rare and not a basic fact of human experience#and they’re insecure about being ‘less valid’ than people who are recognizably gay#so they make up ultra-radical sub-categories that are Way More Queer than HOMOSEXUALITY#i see it all the time here. and irl with younger people. its fucking absurd#gayness has been a sexuality way longer than it’s ever been a community or trend#gay sex is as old as human sexuality itself. pithy identity politics are a construct of a media culture that centers individual branding#I’m fuckin sick and tired of existing in a brand culture— especially as it pretends to be radical and revolutionary#stop fucking agonizing over whether or not you’re valid and try having some GAY SEX for once in your lives#jesus fucking christ
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had the most miserable experience today.
#Got invited to the party of someone I know and like well enough. And it ended up being a lot of people younger than me which is fine#But I also felt a little left out#And it wasnt like the kind of younger than me where they like need help playing the games and stuff#Oh also all of them were from a church youth group so that adds something#And I wanted to leave at 5:30. But my sister wanted to stay a while longer so we stayed.#And somehow my brother showed up#Well I know how he got there but he wasnt supposed to come#But I had to wait even longer since there were then 3 people I had to take home. But my brother told me he wanted us to go to the store to#buy a plushie for his girlfriend#Which on the surface is very cute. But it actually sucks bc his girlfriend is a secret.#And on the way to the store. I already wanted to go home but the party host called my sister bc my sibling left their phone at the party#And my sister said 'oh we will just turn around' but I was eager to get home and I said to the sibling who lost their phone that they shoul#pay me a couple buck s for the gas to make a return trip to the party. Also I had eaten a cookie that was contaminated somehow while I was#driving so here I was trying to coordinate getting the phone back and also trying to not ingest the rancid tasting cookie AND trying todriv#And I ended up hitting the curb loudly while getting into the parking lot at the store. My sibling who lost their phone got out of the car#And started to walk away. I raced after them and they told me that they were just going to go home#I told them no way in hell was I letting them go in the dark by themselves with no phone. They did agree to come back with the rest of us.#but very grudgingly#We got the plush of fucking course he picked the most massive one. And I had to pay bc he didnt have cash on him. And I cant even vent to m#mom abt this bc explaining this would mean letting out abt my brothers girlfriend and he already fucking hates me so that would only make y#Life worse. And I dont know how he has a girlfriend bc he is so mean to me and I dont know why anyone would find him compelling#And hes 5 years younger than me and I've never dated. I'm not exactly in a rush to date but I'd like to have SOME experience.#And hes been dating her for a while too. I told him he cant just have this covered for him forever hes gonna have to come clean one day#And so I'm reeling and having an awful time mentally bc I think I've severely hurt the feelings of the one sibling who likes me#And I had to go to the store when I really just wanted to go home and I had my sister giving pointed comments abt my decisions and the fact#Might have been poisoned by a rancid cookie and I have no one to tell abt this and to top it all off I feel like none of them even understa#How incredibly stressful and awful this made me feel#I am simply not going to take them places for the next month unless I absolutely have to#Bc thats the only power I have in this situation#Also my most minor guilt is I set out to post less vents on tumblr. And this is a vent so :(
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white people are literally so batshit insane bonkers how are you saying these things genuinely where is the though you've lived here your WHOLE life how have you never heard of one of the most important locations in the city...
#je parle#like there's no way these people really are saying these things seriously#um i can't go there isn't it like dangerous? girl it's one city over#getting there takes so much time... you literally said you went there once when you were little with your dad#you tried to get there during rush hour baby it's not our fault you've not googled the times to get there#jesus fuck#your parents are more excited about you going to an undermaintained jam theme park than they are about#you going to a different city full of art culture music life that is also YOUR CLOSE FRIEND'S HOMETOWN who you've heard express how much it#would mean to them to go with you#like mother fuckerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr#white people#ifucking hate them#especially considering you're NOT an immigrant you lived here FOREVER you don;t know the second most spoken language in the region and yo#u want me to be the token mexican in the family teaching the kids spanish etc what do i exist in a fucking vacuum#am i only mexican when in relation to what i can provide#am i only mexican when no one wants to go with me#am i only mexican enough when i'm the only mexican you know?#what if i was browner? what if my hair was longer? what if i was named after my grandfather? huh? what if i was a practicing catholic#and not a mexican jew#what if i was just a jew? would it be easier for you#it would be maybe easier to try to include me when you have fewer marginalized identities#GRA GRA GRA
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so, this blew up on twitter (currently at 15k+ notes and still going ..) which completely blindsided me and now i cant draw again as if i was burnt out right away AGAIN and its rly annoying :I
also on twitter one person called me the r slur on it though and i just blocked them without understanding why they said that .. until i got another one earlier today that said "fuck off with your pronouns and just go make political art" and i realized oh ... people getting mad at pronouns are real after all, its such a non problem to me i didnt see how there was anything offensives about this until that second one spelled it out xD
Empress and her Bodyguard.
(OCs, grey haired lady Zaphira she/her, demon Shargon he/they)
(also some details up close)
and this guy bc i find him funny
#ganondoodles#art#also weirdly enough its doing better on bluesky than on tumblr#like the share to like ratio is much healthier over there for some reason#despite me having only barely 600 followers when i posted it there#(on twitter im at 22k+ and here its 10k+ but most are dead accounts i guess- its so weird to have tumblr be “worst” one)#(bc i have been here far longer than even twitter and feel much more attached to it and the people here)#i wonder if that art block feeling is bc i feel like i should draw more ocs stuff immediately but for others and not for me#idk if that can be the whole reason though#anyway idk what to do now#im so used to oc stuff not getting much attention so it was easier to do it on the side while fandom stuff was the main thing in a way?#and now idk ....................#im also afraid to disappoint people that thought my oc stuff is way cooler based on this art than it actually is#like Shargon isnt a scary demon that eats people#hes an anxiety riddled weakling rejected by other demons and only seems to imposing to humans bc they dont know any other demons#bc they prefer to stay in their world .... except him bc they reject and abuse him..#i have more oc lore and story than i have for the zelda comic but how would i even begin to explain any#id have to draw it all and i cant ..... do that ..... as much as i wish i could im just too slow and low on energy at all times#(the guilt of all the messages i havent answered ... ough .... im sorry)
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