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Ok so I wanted to write this like, almost a week ago, and it's because my little joke has had a lot of reblogs/likes (for me lol), I'm just bad about writing stuff sometimes lol.
So!
To me, writing is one of the few things In the realm of art that I've been able to keep up with over the years. And i feel like there's a few reasons for that.
First: and probably the most important one to me, is that I can read something that someone has written and even when I can clearly tell they are much better and in many cases writing at levels I wish I could im never discouraged. Like, when it comes to physical media art like drawing etc, I get so easily discouraged. It's why I stopped years ago. But writing? I never get that feeling. Yeah I recognize that I'm not as good as that person, but I also feel like my own stories and ideas are just as good in their own way.
Second: I'm sure those who deal in the realm of drawing and other arts also feel this way, but when I read someone else's writing or see someone's art sometimes I just want to add onto it or write my own version with the original being a prompt of sorts. You can see this easily in a lot of my stories where it's prefaced by one of @writing-prompt-s prompts, or an image a mutual or someone i follow posts.
Third: I'm almost always feel accomplished no matter what I've written. I like to go back and read them on occasion to~ (been meaning to make a side blog specifically as an archive to find them easier lol)
But yeah! As much as I love to joke about (even if it's true!) The way we do and don't write things and why, it's great that there's at least one thing that I can say I've never been discouraged about doing and still enjoy~
Now to watch sonic3 and then write something later tonight... or.. well... eventually XD
me as a writer
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WAITING FOR YOU
pairing; rafe cameron x reader
summary; rafe has been neglecting you recently, putting his work before all, you haven’t had any attention for yourself. you finally reach a breaking point on the night where you prepare everything, make everything perfect, and he doesn’t even bat an eyelid.
content; emotional neglect(?), argument
authors note; re upload!
tonight will be perfect, you’re sure of it. ever since rafe had taken on more responsibilities at work you had been pushed to the sidelines a little, but tonight you can’t wait to be his centre of attention.
you have everything ready, you’ve made a lovely meal and set it out on a candlelit table with his favourite bottle of wine ready to open.
you’re dressed up too. a cute little dress on, and underneath some even cuter lingerie. your makeup is done nicely, all waterproof of course, if all goes to plan, you expect to be in floods of blissful tears by the end of the night.
you hear rafe come through the front door just as you add your final touches to the dinner table. you immediately stand up and scurry down the hallway to meet him.
“good evening rafe,” you beam, ready to see him, though your smile falls a bit when you come into contact with him.
he’s got an armful of paperwork and he looks run down, like has constantly for weeks now. you push past it though, this night is going to be good for him too, he needs the break.
“hey sweetheart,” he mumbles absently, immediately making it clear that his mind is on other matters, “look, can you give me like half an hour? just got somethin’ I need to sort out real quick.” he doesn't even wait for an answer, he's already making to climb the stairs towards his office.
you stop him of course, placing a hand on his arm. “wait, I made dinner, it'll go cold.” you feel crestfallen, sure you knew he'd want to work, but right in the door? he didn't even take a moment to look at how nicely dressed up you are.
rafe stops and sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose he speaks in mild frustration, “yeah, yeah I'll eat with you okay? but then I do really have to work.”
you nod, leading him towards the kitchen where the table is set. you pull out a chair, urging him to sit and he does, watching you idly as you walk round and take your own place. “I made your favourite,” you beam. in honesty, making his favourite isn't that much of a feat, he's a very basic eater. but it's the thought that counts.
it's a quiet meal. rafe doesn't pay that much attention, only giving absent and short answers to the questions you ask. his day was fine. work was fine. his plans are to do work stuff. he's feeling fine. the meal is fine. if he could have bothered to ask, you would have told him that you are not fine with any of those answers. it's like he doesn't care that you did this for him.
the moment he’s finished he rises, scratching the back of his neck he speaks, “I gotta go.. do some admin.. food was good.”
“rafe wait…” you stop him from where you still sit at the table. you’ve not even finished your food yet and he’s already leaving. “I thought that we could maybe go upstairs.. spend some time together.” you make it so obvious in your tone as to what you’re suggesting.
he sighs, “maybe later okay? maybe later.” and just like that he’s walking away, just like he has been doing for weeks on end.
*
later, you are laying on your bed, half asleep, waiting for him.
the candle on the bedside table is almost burned out, it’s ugly now. you are undressed, still putting up with the uncomfortable underwear on your body, just so you can look good when he comes in.
it must be nearly eleven o’clock at night when you finally hear his footsteps coming down the hallway. you quickly do your best to wake yourself up and reassume the position you were laying in before.
when rafe comes through the door he stops, looking a little stunned, “why aren't you asleep?” he asks bluntly. that certainly wasn't what you were expecting. not even a little bit of praise, not a thirsty look, nothing.
“are you serious?” you sit up, now you’re frustrated. he’s been pushing you aside for so long, and he can’t even acknowledge what you’re doing for him.
“what do you mean, am I serious? what the fuck is all this?” he gestures to the room, the lowered lights, the candle, you.
“it’s for you.” you frown, “I thought you’d want- I thought you would like this. I thought you’d be happy.”
“baby I didn’t ask you to do any of this.” he says crossly, “I have other things to focus on.. I- I’ve got work! I don’t have time for this.”
this is your breaking point, tears begin to slip down your cheeks, “you never have time for this. that’s the problem.”
his eyes land on you, “problem? you have a problem? I’m a grown man now, I have responsibilities.. I have to make priorities.”
“well they’re wrong! your priorities are wrong!” you snap, sitting up on the bed to lock eyes with him, “I should be a priority. but— but you’ve just been pushing me away all because of work! we haven’t had sex in weeks and.. and you barely talk to me anymore!” you start to rant, “I’ve put so much effort into making tonight perfect and you haven’t even bothered to thank me! I’m tired, and I want to spend time with you. I miss you rafe!”
It’s silent for a few seconds before he lets out a weary sigh, “that’s what all this is about huh? I’m neglecting you.”
you sniffle pitifully, “that’s not what I said.”
he shakes his head and comes to sit down on the bed with you, “what you meant though,” he looks down at his lap for a moment before patting his leg, “c’mere.”
you reluctantly crawl into his lap, resting your messy cheek on his covered chest. he starts to speak again, “I’m sorry. I.. I will admit that I haven’t been paying enough attention to you.. okay.. I’ll change that. promise.”
part of you wants to snap again and say ‘see! how easy was that to admit! why did it take you so fucking long!?”
you don’t snap though, you don’t have the energy. instead you murmur and go closer to him, “m’sorry for gettin’ mad at you rafe.”
he shakes his head, “just missed me, I know.” he rubs your back, before pulling you to face him. “hey.. think it would be a bit of a shame for you to have got this dressed up for nothin’ huh?”
#lily writes 𝜗𝜚#rafe cameron prompt#sweetie!reader#rafe cameron concept#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron obx#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron imagine#rafe outer banks#rafe cameron#rafe x reader
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(secret) santa, baby - part 10 of a shigaraki x f!reader fic
Shigaraki doesn't want to participate in the office's Secret Santa exchange, but when Toga promises to make it easy on him, he gives in. But making it easy for him makes it a lot harder for you -- you're the one who got his list. Office AU, no quirks. A fic in 12 parts. Divider by @ wcnderlnds
part i part ii part iii part iv part v part vi part vii part viii part ix part x part xi
part x (huddling for warmth)
The automatic doors hiss shut behind you, straining against the wind, and even though it’s cold enough inside the lobby to see your breath, you can’t help breathing a sigh of relief. “We made it.”
Tomura’s been leaning against you for most of the walk from the train section. If he’s relieved the same way you are, he’s shivering too much for it to show. “Did you think we wouldn’t?”
“No,” you admit. “We’d have been in trouble if the walk was longer, though. It got really cold out there.”
“It’s really cold in here,” Tomura mutters. “Are you sure they have the heat on?”
“They have to, for the pipes. It’s just not on very high.” In the time since you and Tomura left, the building’s gone from being wide awake to being on what you can only call life support. The elevator panel is dark, only some of the lights are on, and the only sound you can hear other than your breathing and Tomura’s is the howl of the wind. “Is it just me, or – uh –”
“This is fucking creepy,” Tomura agrees. “Like the start of a horror movie or something.”
You were split on how to feel about the situation – some part of you that never grew out of being in high school a little excited about being snowed in with the guy you like, the rest of you wondering how you’ll feel about that when neither of you have showered in a couple of days. What Tomura just said puts it in perspective. “You know how people are always really dumb at the start of a horror movie?”
“Yeah.”
“Let’s not do any of that stuff.”
Tomura cracks a grin at that, and his lips split and bleed. “Sounds good.”
Not being horror-movie dumb starts with keeping away from the windows, because that’s where it’s coldest. It also starts with getting in contact with somebody who can help. Tomura has a friend who has chains on his truck and a snowplow he can attach to the front of it, but his friend lives all the way out of town, and it’ll be hours before he can make it in. Once Tomura’s gotten the ETA – sometime past midnight – the two of you set your phones aside to conserve battery. The power’s still on, for now, but you don’t want to be caught off-guard if it goes out.
“Now that we called for help, we have to stay put,” you say. “The people who go running off into the storm always die.”
“You couldn’t pay me enough to go out there again,” Tomura says. He’s shivering a little less now that you’ve cleared out of the lobby, with its open spaces and floor-to-ceiling glass doors. “What about food? Nobody I work with keeps snacks down there.”
“You couldn’t pay me to go down in the basement right now,” you say. “People up in my pod keep food around. And heat rises, so we should head up there anyway.”
You have to let go of Tomura to climb the stairs, which is when you realize just how long you’ve been holding onto him. You started out with your arm around his shoulders, but he’s taller than you are, and by the time you pull away, it’s slid down around his waist. The reasonable part of you is wondering why he didn’t tell you to let go sooner. The high-school part of you is deciding that guys’ waists are more attractive than you thought they were.
Neither of those parts of you are going to help you survive a horror movie, or being snowed in with the guy you like. You focus on finding food.
The head of the Acquisitions department keeps a stockpile of gourmet instant ramen in his office, and he’s always offering it to people. You don’t think he’ll mind if you steal two packages, and you can always apologize later. Add in water from the electric teakettle in the breakroom and some hot sauce and soy sauce packets you stole, and it’s a decent dinner. The two of you eat it huddled up in the waiting room outside the department heads’ offices, sitting in two uncomfortable chairs and ignoring the couch.
You’re not sure why you’re ignoring the couch. The two of you slept on the couch together at Toga’s movie night, albeit on opposite ends, and sitting there together when you’re wide awake and trying not to freeze is the smart thing to do. Even in your coats, it’s still cold in here, and you should try to conserve body heat. It makes sense. It all fits in with surviving a horror movie. You can’t get the words out of your mouth.
“Am I going crazy, or does it feel colder in here?” Tomura asks, after you’ve both set your empty containers of soup aside. “It’s colder.”
“Maybe because we ran out of soup.” You definitely felt warmer while you were trying not to burn your mouth. “I have hot chocolate packets at my desk. Or I guess we should probably make coffee –”
“If you mix hot chocolate and instant coffee, it’s like a mocha,” Tomura says. You blink. “Magne says so, anyway.”
Hot chocolate mix and instant coffee. “I’ll try anything once. I’ll be right back,” you start, and Tomura gets to his feet. “No, you should stay.”
“People in horror movies always split up, and that’s when they die,” Tomura says. “I’m coming with you.”
Whether it’s gotten colder or not, the lights have definitely gotten dimmer, and the air is still and moist. Tomura walks close enough to you that you keep bumping into him, and finally you put your arm around him to hopefully control the number of times you run into each other. You go to the break room first, since it’s furthest away, then stop by your desk for the hot chocolate mix. “My Secret Santa got me a hot chocolate bomb,” Tomura says as you walk back. “Have you ever had one of those?”
“No. They look fun, though,” you say. That’s why you got one for him. “Have you tried it yet?”
“Yeah. It was good.” Tomura’s carrying the instant coffee can and the cups you grabbed. He watches you over them. “Would you get something for somebody that you hadn’t tried to see if it was good?”
You get a weird hit of foreboding. “I mean, I think people usually just go off the list,” you say. You take three or four hot chocolate packets and stack them up on top of the coffee can and cups. “And I don’t think they try the stuff. Spinner didn’t try that limited-edition eyeshadow palette he got for Aiba, did he?”
“No.” Tomura snorts. “She still thinks it’s her boyfriend buying her the stuff. Can you believe that?”
“Yes,” you say. Then you think about Aiba’s boyfriend, who you run into at the copy machine every so often. “Wait, has he ever gotten her anything that wasn’t tea?”
“He only gets her stuff he likes,” Tomura says. You wouldn’t have expected him to be that tapped in to office gossip. “Don’t look surprised. There aren’t many of us down there and it echoes like crazy. I pick things up even when I don’t want to.”
“They’ve been together for a while, right?” you ask. Tomura nods. The two of you reach the waiting area and you lift the supplies out of his arms, then tap the electric teakettle to get it working again. “It’s kind of sad, then. That her coworker with a crush on her cares more about getting her what she likes than her boyfriend does.”
You realize Tomura’s staring at you. “Not that that’s a reason to break up or anything.”
“She edits all his YouTube videos for free,” Tomura says. “Not that that’s a reason to break up. Or anything. Stop looking at me.”
You return your attention to the hot-chocolate in a hurry. “I should send him to talk to you about this shit,” Tomura continues. He sits down on the couch. “Toga’s advice is always insane, and I don’t know anything.”
“I don’t know anything, either,” you say. “Except if you like someone, you should notice what they like instead of trying to get them to like the stuff you do.”
The teakettle clicks, and you pour water into each of the cups, stirring them one at a time. “Okay. Moment of truth. Does it taste like a mocha or not?”
Tomura takes his cup but doesn’t raise it to his lips. “Are you going to sit down or just stand there?”
There’s space next to him on the couch. You settle down into it before trying a sip of the doctored hot chocolate. “It’s – not bad. Not a mocha, but not bad.”
“Not as good as a hot chocolate bomb,” Tomura says. “You should try one sometime.”
So he liked it. You feel the familiar rush of triumph that’s come over you every time you’ve gotten positive feedback on a gift you’ve given him, even if it was indirect. Usually you’re not sitting next to him when it happens, though. Usually you’re not so close to him finding out. “Maybe I’ll put it on my Secret Santa list next year.”
The two of you drink in silence, and you come to the conclusion that Tomura’s right – it is getting colder in here. Even the hot chocolate, scalding when it went into the cups, can’t hold onto the heat for long. Without meaning to, you find yourself huddling closer to Tomura, your winter coat rustling awkwardly against his. Tomura drains his hot chocolate in one last swallow that must burn the hell out of his tongue, then turns to you. “Come here.”
You cough on your last sip. “What?”
“In movies. People always freeze to death because they don’t share body heat.” Tomura’s averting his eyes from yours again, his face flushed. He’s still wearing your hat. “Come here. And unzip your jacket.”
He’s unzipping his. You unzip yours, too. Tomura gestures for you to come closer, still averting his eyes, and once you’re within reach, he pulls you awkwardly in against his chest. With your jackets both unzipped, his body’s warmth is all too inviting. It only makes sense for you to settle closer. Tomura’s tense at first. As you relax into his arms, so does he.
You remember waking up at one end of Toga’s couch, remember how the first thought in your head was that you were at the wrong end. You were supposed to be at the same end as Tomura, wrapped up like this, because he hates the cold and you knew you’d be able to keep him warm. You wanted to be what he’d reach for first. Like you are right now. “Is this what you had in mind?”
“It’s close,” Tomura says. You’re wondering what else he could be after when his gloved hand finds yours, covering it completely. “We’re killing this horror-movie thing.”
“Unless there are monsters,” you say nonsensically. In your defense, he’s holding your hand. “If there are monsters, we’re in trouble.”
“We’ve still got it.” Tomura’s voice goes softer, losing just a hint of its harsh edge. You remember this from the movie night, too – remember that it wasn’t a sleep thing, remember that it was just a sign that he was comfortable, at ease. You’ve never seen him be that way without his friends nearby until now. “If you can protect me from Yamada and the stupid Grinch song, you can handle a few monsters.”
“Sure. I’ll just sing Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer until they lose their will to live,” you say, and Tomura laughs. You haven’t heard him laugh before, and your face flushes when you realize just how much you like the sound. “You’re right. Monsters have nothing on me.”
“On us,” Tomura corrects. His voice sounds calm, but his hand is shaking slightly where it covers yours. You shift your grip and lace your fingers through his. “We’ve got it.”
His hand settles in yours, steadying so quickly that it’s hard to believe it ever shook in the first place. You tuck it into place against your chest and let your head fall against Tomura’s shoulder. “Yeah. We do.”
<- part ix part xi ->
#shigaraki x reader#shigaraki x you#tomura shigaraki x reader#tomura shigaraki x you#shigaraki tomura x reader#shigaraki tomura x you#x reader#reader insert#man door hand hook car door#secret santa au
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Good Omens graphic novel update: December 2024
We promised a graphic novel treat for December to send off 2024, which we have at the end of the update, so let's dive in!
Colleen has been working diligently ahead of the graphic novel going to print next month, which she discussed over on Patreon. For those looking for more behind the scenes on both Good Omens and Colleen's work more broadly, we recommend either following her Substack, or subscribing via Patreon, as she approaches the finish line.
A snapshot from our production HQ where dummy books of the graphic novel, slipcase and other editions of Good Omens have been arriving thick and fast. The graphic novel (slipcased version shown) has quite the heft to it. It's going to be such a magnificent object inside and out.
Here, we're testing out the various papers, finishes, embellishments and more – everything is falling into place!
Merch-wise, some more delights. The A.Z. Fell & Co tote bag design is in, one side in celebration of our favourite angelic bookseller, the other as if it's been purchased from the bookshop itself, so you can take your pick.
We've got more pins that will be available in the 3-pin set add ons. While the full list will be available in 2025, we're happy to share a few more to get excited about:
On the trading card front, have a look at some of the base deck designs by Steve Gregson and Kirsty Hunter in situ as this all comes together rather nicely, and causes a heated game or two behind the scenes.
And, a quick admin note to wrap up that we always recommend checking the FAQ page as a first port of call for any queries. If you have questions tied to specific tiers, we'd suggest checking the last few updates if your answer can't be found on the FAQ. If there is any information required for your pledge, we will be in touch. We will be back at full steam in the New Year!
Thank you.
So, to wrap up this year's updates, we give you the draft of the full first scene of the graphic novel, artwork by Colleen Doran and lettering by Lois Buhalis. If you'd like to wait until the graphic novel publishes in Spring, skip everything after the ducks!
To 2025 🥂
Until next time.
+ post from Colleen Doran:
Good Omens: You Get...Stuff Like This
In the most recent Good Omens update at the Kickstarter, a few people got upset at the suggestion that you have to get past my paywall here to see Good Omens updates.
Except you really don't, and the post doesn't actually say you do. You get a bit more, like pics of my studio, a discussion of tools and process - but not all of that is exclusively about Good Omens.
I think the Dunmanifestin team just wanted to draw a little attention to my blogs and other works, for which I am very grateful.
As my Patreon supporters already know, Good Omens info posted here gets to the Substack and Kickstarter eventually. And since most of my posts here aren't just about Good Omens, but my other projects and personal stuff, as well as links to our weekly Virtual Art Studio sessions, I think I'm justified in keeping that material behind a paywall.
In fact, I don't think I've posted much stuff about Good Omens since the summer: pages of flats like the one you see above, a few studio photos, and color tweaks.
Also, me boo-hooing about my nerves and health.
But for those who feel left out missing even this small amount of stuff, then the screen shot above is for you.
That's called a flat.
It's a prelim color before adding final color.
Here's what the final color looks like.
So I've posted a handful of this sort of thing since this summer, but frankly, there's even more of my sketches and so on posted at my Instagram that aren't here at all.
For those who don't know, I am doing most of the color myself on the book, but I am working with assistants. I'm not sure how much the Dunmanifestin team wants out there before the big reveals, but here's a snippet of a sky.
In the first image, my flat color.
And after my assistant worked on it.
Here, I've done a repaint. Sometimes I do very extensive repaints after the assistant works on a page. Sometimes not so much. I didn't use assistants on many pages at all. About 80% of the labor on the color of the book is my work.
However, the assistants have been a big help, and I am very appreciative of them.
I will make a point to go through all my prior posts and get every single bit of art that you haven't seen and make it public for all of you in the coming weeks. I need to excise it from previous posts. As I respect the privacy of all my readers, I never make prior posts public without their permission as they may not want their comments or identities to be public.
Thanks so much for everything!
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And if "just ignore them and write it anyway" doesn't overcome the anxiety, here's alternate advice:
Remember that these are opinions, and it is perfectly reasonable to consider others' opinions, but if you ask enough people, there WILL be mutually exclusive opinions out there. You CANNOT please everyone, as in it is literally physically not possible, you have slightly higher odds of your molecules lining up exactly the right way to jump through a solid wall. There is not a single decision you can ever make that will avoid the chance of someone not liking it; if enough people see your work, someone WILL have an issue with something, which means you don't have to worry about "what if". Might someone misunderstand? Might someone find it annoying or boring or upsetting? Immutably, yes; if the answer is ever no it just means not enough people have seen it yet. So stop trying to do the impossible!
And once you've got that part, think about what you can control. Look at the opinions you're worried about and actually break them down. Why does dirtysocks574774757 hate that trope?
If it's "overdone", is that actually a problem? Is it popular because many people enjoy it? Is it a little cliche, but something you personally enjoy seeing in other words even knowing that it is? Or if the problem with "overdone" is that it's overshadowing other good options, does anything else appeal to you? Is there a way you can add a unique twist to the trope, keeping what you like while also making it stand out and having all the more fun with it?
If it's "unrealistic", are you trying to be realistic? Is this an escapist fantasy or personal venting where making things better/cooler/gritter/edgier/whatever than real life is part of the point? Is pushing this idea harmful, and if so, what about it is the problem? Is there a way to address that part without avoiding everything even slightly adjacent to the trope with a 40 foot pole?
Remember that no one's opinion is objective law. Even if something is overdone to a point of becoming a stereotype, as long as that stereotype isn't spreading harmful misinformation or actively shitting on people, it doesn't mean you have to avoid anything that even might look close as much as possible at all costs, it means be careful.
Ex: Your gay character can be flamboyant, I promise; the problem isn't camp gays existing, it's when the one (1) gay character or couple in a series is always Like That and little if anything else. So just don't do that part! Remember context, too. It's very different having a whole group who all act a certain way vs a group where only one/some do, ya know? I know this post was more about pet peeves and stuff but I'm saying, if even stuff that can be genuinely bad doesn't have to always be, then you also definitely shouldn't be stressing harmless fun tropes.
Above all else: remember it's better to do something right than to do nothing wrong. There is no amount of effort you could put in to make your work appeal to everyone, but the closer you get to making it tolerable to everyone (still impossible to achieve fully), the less likely you are to appeal to much of anyone. So don't worry yourself to death (or worse, to a point of never making anything) avoiding everything that might be offputting. Instead, when you find yourself worried about a potential issue, examine it, weigh your options, and make a conscious choice about if you want to keep, alter, or scrap it. As long as you're being mindful about your decisions rather than just throwing things in with no regard, you should be FINE.
People relate to messy complex characters, and what one person finds "unrealistic" could just be a thing they don't get, but that makes someone else feel incredibly seen and validated. People like stupid indulgent fantasies! And if you need proof people will actively seek out and enjoy reading the same shit over and over, look no farther than "Coffee Shop AU" or "Only One Bed".
In the end, there's little more powerful than passion from a creator. Write what you like, write what you'd want to read, make the points you want to make. There will always be people who just don't like the things you like, and no amount of trying to water yourself down for them will make them anything more than tolerant. So write for you and the people who do like what you like, and put your whole body into it. Someone will always hate it and someone will always enjoy it, and the more you write something you enjoy, the more likely it is that the people who do like it will really, really like it. Don't hold yourself back!
hey, writers. especially neurodivergent writers with anxiety or OCD.
if you see one of those writing advice posts that is literally just, ‘these tropes suck’, ‘this story idea sucks’, ‘this sucks’, ‘that sucks’, ‘all of this is horrible’.. don’t dwell on it.
these are just random people on the internet, okay? they’re just acting like they know everything and that their personal preferences are universal.
you don’t have to listen to them, write whatever you want, regardless of if dirtysocks574774757 on Tumblr/Pinterest doesn’t like it.
(ahem, if a user by the name of dirtysocks574774757 from Tumblr or Pinterest actually does see this.. sorry 😅 i’m sure you understand)
#this is long#but man one of my best friends has OCD and I've spent years now watching how often he'll send me like#one (1) Twitter Post and start panicking that he's doing something Wrong and needs to make huge changes#>:( So I've gotten used to shaking him like. NO. Listen. You can TAKE THIS UNDER ADVISEMENT without drastically rerouting all of everything#also maybe that person is stupid did you consider that#xD But yeah I know at least for him 'just ignore it' would NOT work so we go the long way.#'You don't have to 100% embrace OR 100% ignore. Just spin it around and weigh your options. And IF you make changes they can be minor.'#'There are basically always more options than All or Nothing.'#writing advice
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Is Nana legitimately uncomfortable with the idea of being a mom or is she just flustered by the idea of it?
Both.
I'll start this long response off by saying that Jack and Nana DO have kids IN AN AU! They have six of them in an AU I refer to as the "Parent AU" where I can toy with the concept and dynamic of the two having offspring.
BUT in the canon of Beanstalked, and basically all the other AUs featuring the two that aren't the Parent AU, Nana doesn't want kids.
The thought results in very mixed feelings for her, with discomfort outweighing her comfort. She loves Jack and if the situation ever occurred where she was pregnant, she'd feel better knowing its his kid because he's a trustworthy and protective fella who'd never let anything happen to her. And the thought of carrying his children does make her flustered and gives her butterflies sometimes...
But she'd very much love to avoid ever having to deal with being knocked up in the first place. The idea of being pregnant, dealing with all the issues that come with pregnancy like the mood swings, cravings, weird body stuff, fluctuating energy, and the ordeal of childbirth itself is just too much for her.
Add in the fact having kids is a never ending responsibility and stressor, especially with the world she and Jack live in where literally ANYTHING can happen, and you got Nana's typically tough and stoic exterior crumble and she becomes more skittish and avoidant of the topic.
Jack doesn't really have kids on the mind either. I say "doesn't really" because he is honestly leaving the idea to Nana to decide. It's her body and her decision ultimately. After all these years, dude is still ecstatic that she decided to date him at all. So having kids isn't an end goal for him, he just wants a happy life with his future wife.
I decided that Jack and Nana don't have kids in their canon timeline because it's a rarity to see a male and female in a romantic relationship that don't want or have children. And I grew up constantly having couples in animate movies and series I watch have kids since it was basically the default. Even if they didn't have kids in the first movie, you could bet your ass that the sequel either had the couple from the first dealing with children or they toss in a last minute twist where the girl reveals she's pregnant.
And around the time I was plotting out the ending of Beanstalked, a lot of the shounen I was into or knew about, were ending with couples having babies (typically as a set up to a spin off focusing on a next gen situation).
As someone who doesn't want kids at all, I think it's important to have a couple who also make it apparent they don't want kids. It's a POV that, AGAIN, isn't that frequent of an occurrence in media featuring a m/f relationship. And Red Beans is a deeply personal OC ship for me, which is why they are like...the only ship out of the main three that don't have kids in their canon. Pluto and Nova craft Comet, and Sweetheart and Bitterbat wind up giving birth to 13 whole little monsters.
Jack and Nana don't have an kids in their canon future because I want their love for each other to be enough for them to be happy together.
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Swap au clownbo thingy for the clownbo/everyone people (I’ll do Seastar soon I promise) but it kinda has a twist to it @beebutadinosaur this is for you! (And everyone but also you!)
There’s more below the cut since there’s a lot here ehehehe
Establishing stuff right now for it:
Evbo (the Villain) takes the place of Clown but, to add some flavour to it, he was originally the Parkour Champion and was well loved by the people before he ended up getting betrayed and locked up in the lava prison by Seawatt. Void (EmF) ended up finding out what Seawatt did when he interrogated him on Evbo’s whereabouts and felt a overwhelming sense of revulsion at the realisation of what his lover (toxic Yaoi x2) did to his best friend, though Seawatt tries to justify his actions that he did it for them since now Void can be the champion instead of Evbo. Evbo eventually grew bitter and resentful from the betrayal by Seawatt, as well as seeing it as a betrayal from his people that he looked after, that he promised Void when he returns that he would destroy it and leave it all in ashes. He gets commonly refer to as ‘Hero’ by everyone and when it’s revealed that he used to be the old parkour champion that’s what everyone calls him except Void, even Seawatt forget Evbo’s name after so long.
Seawatt takes on the takes the place of the Evil Champion and pretty much has done his best to erase the Evbo’s name from the records of Parkour Civilisation and the Leather level from complete existence as well (similar to how the chain level was erased from everyone’s memory in Parkour Civilisation 2), utterly paranoid on the potential of Evbo escaping from there…he pretty much has a sock puppet Champion that wears decoy diamond boots (similar to his own in the end) that he uses to ensure that people are following his rules and to keep them in line from behind the scenes. Exceedingly paranoid, desperate and very dangerous to keep what he did underwraps…as well as missing Void a lot as well…still terrible at Parkour as well lmao
Void takes on the place of the old man (and Seawatt as well lol) where he’s trying to guide the Holt (the old man) and Clown (who kinda takes the place of both Evbo and EMF as well mostly EmF for Holt but he’s also Evbo’s role here) to find the Leather level and ferry back information to Evbo on what’s going on with them. Pretty much a tired, regretful man that desperately wants to make things right and help his friend with what happened to him since he doesn’t deserve it. He’s a mentor and guide to Holt and Clown and ensures that they are safe to the best of his abilities while leaving little breadcrumbs of a place that shouldn’t, but does, exist and the people from it…
Holt (the old man) mostly takes the place of Evbo and is the person that Void decides to use in order to get Evbo out of his prison with Clown being his longtime friend in the Chain Level. Pretty much a ace in parkour and exceedingly skilled at making jumps the more he got used to it in the end. Clown was his longtime neighbour before the other decided to move up in parkour and take on the challenge of climbing the tower while Holt decided to hold back onto it until a recent decree by the champion made him want to climb up the tower to face him.
Clown takes the place of EMF (and technically evbo as well UwU) but in the au holt and clown both hailed from the chain level before clown decided he wanted to rank up since he was tired of how little skill the parkour on the chain level took and wanted to prove himself moreso in the upper levels. That’s not the only reason to why he wants to rank up as well…he ended up finding a strange book that talked about the old parkour champion…something that he could barely read but the desire to know consuming him that he decided to track up to try and find out more about them.
That’s pretty much the roles that they all play here in this au for the time being…Evbo the hero turned villain that’s manipulating Clown and Holt in the background to get him out, Void who wants to help his friend out and then Seawatt who’s desperate for recognition but wants to hide himself from the light…then we have Holt who wants to do the right thing and help people…Clown who wants to prove himself to someone-anyone-and be seen by them.
I’ll be posting more on this at a later date but I shall leave you with some particular design quirks they would all have!
Evbo has a more kingly/princely look to him with a flowing green cloak, no headband (unfortunately) with his hair flowing (shoulder length hair for this one), green stripped shirt, black pants and diamond shoes (something that resembles sneakers in the end that contrasts his entire look). He’s kinda meant to contrast Clown’s look in PkCiv with him looking more like a Prince/king while clown is a jester.
Seawatt keeps the same design in all honesty except his diamond boots are meant are duller in colour (a big indicator that they’re fake diamond boots) and look like sandals with slight, pale green cracks in them. His hair is longer and messier as well with dark circles under his eyes…as well as gold ring on his finger.
Void has a dark purple wrapped over his shoulders, that goes below the knees, with a golden rope tied around the waist, a golden headband and golden ankle boots. His skin also looks a black vortex of stars and dying supernovas with a red spattering of stars around his neck and chest…a golden ring is on his finger as well.
Holt is pretty basic with a teal shirt, blue pants, dark brown hair and beard, silver arm band with a spidery design and diamond sandals (the ones that cover the back and front of the foot). He also has a red jumper wrapped around his waist with bits of black stripes on it.
Clown does wear his typical outfit with the addition of a dark teal jacket being worn, fingerless gloves, his hat is more softer looking (not pointed like devil horns but more like a rams horns kinda??) with silver bells on it, his mask is a plain white mask with eye slits and a black smile on it (a red heart under the right eye with a black diamond on the bottom left corner of the lip to resemble a beauty mark) and his diamond boots resemble laced up riding boots that goes below his knees.
Some simple things here but I please ask me questions if you want to know more!
#parkour civilization#clownbo#parkour civilisation#parkour villain#evbo#swap au clownbo#they’re in love (I’m delusional)#Seastar
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Ephemer Week Day 4
Prompt: Promise | Love | A relationship/dynamic you enjoy
There was an obvious answer for this one, haha. Written from Player's POV for the sake of my sanity.
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“I have an idea.”
You’ve come to realize that those words are never a good sign—especially when they’re coming out of Ephemer’s mouth, and he’s got a grin on his face that says this ‘idea’ is closer to mischief than Union Leader-related duties. It’s even less encouraging when it’s roughly five in the morning, and he had invited himself over for a visit, a bewildered Skuld in tow.
You look at her now, and she shrugs and smiles helplessly. That does nothing to soothe your worries.
“You know how there are rumors that the town’s haunted, right?”
You…had heard some of those rumors, actually. People would talk about how the air would suddenly feel dead, sound dropping away except for a strange, static-y noise. Their skin would prickle, and their hair would rise, and they’d be overcome with this strange, sudden feeling of dread. And then they’d see—someone. Not always someone they knew—but they’d always be this hazy, almost glitchy thing, going about their day as if no one else was there.
…That’s what you’d heard, at any rate.
“Do you think they’re Heartless?” Skuld asks, and you wince; you suppose that would make the most sense.
But then, Ephemer is already shaking his head. “That’s the thing—they always say they’re actual people. I think Brain said he saw one the other day.”
“He’s probably just trying to mess with you.”
“But what if he’s not?”
There is a light in his eyes that tells you exactly where his mind is going. “You want to go looking for them, don’t you?” you sign, and try to convey as much exasperation in your expression as you can.
Ephemer grins and points at you. “Yes!”
“Ghost hunting?” Skuld asks, incredulous.
“Yeah! Come on, it’ll be fun. We can go with full gear and everything.”
“From where?”
“Steal it from Brain.”
“Does…he have ghost-hunting gear?” you sign, giving your friends a baffled look.
Ephemer shrugs. “He has a lot of weird stuff, so—probably.”
Skuld worries her lip, looking hesitant. “I don’t know…”
“Come on. Please?” Ephemer’s expression softens a bit, and he adds, “We haven’t done much together recently, you know? And if there is something, it’d be good to know—right?”
Something crosses Skuld’s face, and she relaxes, just a little. “I guess.”
Ephemer’s grin broadens, and he swings to you. “You in?”
You sigh, but the answer’s obvious: of course you’re going along. You think Ephemer’s schemes are ridiculous, sometimes, but you wouldn’t miss one of them for the world.
…Besides, you can tease him about it later.
#ephemerweek2024#ephemer week 2024#kingdom hearts#kingdom hearts fanfic#my writing#i need you to imagine them getting into scooby doo-style shenanigans later on
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Can you walk all the way around it? Mercury - NO. You'd think so but it's way too close to the sun, it's too hot, you'd probably need a big umbrella and they've never taken one to space. Venus - NO. It's basically the same size as earth, incredibly boring because no fun landmarks, way too foggy, huge risk of getting lost. Earth - Yes, BUT. You can walk all the way around it, but the problem here is that other people have already done it. Sure it's possible, but nobody's gonna care. Mars - NO. It's a nice place, with a beautiful sky, nice temperatures for a holiday, and lots of robots to make friends with, but don't let those 'rivers' fool you. There's nothing to drink on Mars, and as we all know, walking around a planet is thirsty work! Jupiter - NO. You're not allowed to because it's too gassy and let's be honest, you would get tired too fast. It's the biggest planet ever discovered!* Saturn - Yes, BUT. The problem is not the size, despite what pictures will show you it's actually much bigger than the inch across that google images pretends it is. The problem is not resources, it's probably got a lot more food and drink than the pictures show too, it's named after the roman god of harvest! The issue you would face is having to look up as you sleep in your sleeping bag every night and see that fucking ring. And you know that even if you walk all the way around Saturn (which is totally doable), that for the rest of your life, everybody you ever talk to will ask you 'wait the planet or the ring' and you will have to look them in the eye and sadly explain that you can't walk on the ring because it's not actually solid, it's lots of little bits of stuff and they're not joined together. Uranus - NO. To take a quote from NASA's (leading spaciologists) website, "Uranus' environment is not conducive to life as we know it. The temperatures, pressures, and materials that characterize this planet are most likely too extreme and volatile for organisms to adapt to." It's impossible to even think about walking when the conditions are that bad, but there might be public transport if you need to take short trips. Neptune - NO. To be honest we forgot about this one, but it's named after that the ocean king or something and that's really scary, so you're probably not missing out on much. Pluto - YES!!!!! Pluto is literally the perfect planet, if your legs are long enough you can probably do it in a day, but I would suggest taking your time to really enjoy the sights. It's really far away from the sun, so you don't need sunscreen, and at since it gets to 35K (Kelsius maybe?) at night, you'll not even need a blanket! Most importantly, since '''scientists''' decided it's no longer a planet, it's left off of a lot of brochures, so there won't be any annoying tourists pushing up motel prices. A lovely weekend visit!
Honourable mention - The Sun. Lots of people asked me to add this to the list because they see it on planet charts but it's actually not a planet and is instead something else. I hope this helps!
*No it's not.
i think my only big disagreement with the consensus of pluto not being a planet is that dwarf planets aren't considered a type of planet. like, why aren't they just a subclass of planet. the major planets and minor planets. sorry but these bitches are more interesting than me than mars
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Guys. Have y'all ever had onion soup? Because I need to talk about it.
Onion soup is epic. Onions themselves are epic. They taste good fried/caramelized and it's so good. It pairs well with ANYTHING. And sometimes raw onions also just pack that punch you need in certain dishes and it's so good.
And then you're telling me it was put in SOUP??
LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN THIS SHIT????
It's food heaven imo.
It's onions(one of the few foods that go good with everything and can be eaten at any time) in BROTH with all the other good stuff AND it's french(idk why I put that but french food has the impression of being fancy to me) AND it's paired with cheese and goes epic with baguette slices.
Onion soup is epic
I rest my case
#ok actually not yet i havent said enough so in the tags here we go#you can also dip just about anything in onion soup. not just bread. and itll be good#you can add all kinds of stuff in it to adjust to your own taste and its technically still onion soup if theres lost of onion in it#it can be adjusted to different textures in the same way#and you can add as much or as little other stuff#and i swear theres not been a single person ive met whos like “yeah i DONT like onion soup.”#(or maybe i just havent asked enough people)#but personally its a favourite of mine#i could have onion soup with mashed potatoes anytime#the most epic combo#my love for potatoes will have to wa8t another day for a rant#because its much much longer rant than onion soup and much much more passionate#(i really need to stop or else ill never manage to post this)
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Finally back, with a lil more of Chill's Artist Admiration Sketchbook; making fanart for blogs I like :D
@kingspacebar
Accessoires and colours my beloved <3 <3 <3
#(The tags are gonna be a bit of an essay I apologize :P )#I only realized late that I was mixing the designs of different references that all had slightly diff accessoires#So I just decided to add them all#I always say I want to draw more bright colours because I love them so much and then I never do because I'm bad at colour palettes#I'm always super impressed with artists who can make them all work SO well together#With that out of the way OMG I LOVE THESE CHARACTER DESIGNS SO MUCH!!!!#Had to stop myself from going into the askbox multiple times to gush about them; because I wanted to wait until now#The colours are so good! AND THE CLOTHES!!! I wish I looked like that fr fr#I also just love the way the eyes and the faces look (you don't wanna know *how* often I changed the size/position of those eyes /lh)#Of course; rhythm games my beloved! Couldn't not include a little Osu! in the background#But srs going back to colours I had to compose myself multiple times while drawing this because I loved them so much#This character did smth to my brain /pos#(I forgot what Tumblr's tag limit is and I still have to add stuff so I'll stop here but aaaaaah)#no id#other's ocs#fursona#fanart#cw eyestrain#<- just in case; maybe I'm a bit over-careful with this tag lol#chill's art#chill's artist admiration sketchbook
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no youre completely right - im a gay (trans)man and i legit wanna see so much more about the women bc There Is So Little. I wanna make a lesbian oc who gets bent in half by taash. im very normal.
i’m just tired man!!!! it feels so obvious how disproportionate it is when you’ve got. a cast of characters that we know almost equally little about. and a few of them explode in popularity and it’s like spongebob sticking his hand out the curtain. literally all a character needs to do numbers is to be a light-skinned man
#like you bring up taash!! we know equally little abt taash and emmrich. why is one FUCKING EVERYWHERE and i’m like. scrounging for scraps#sometimes i feel like there has to be a secret other main dragon age tag that has the real stuff in it#but maybe it’s just the tumblr userbase idfk#i feel like i’ve seen a little bit more of neve since the trailer but still not anything on the level as everyone’s fave boys#and before you hit me with ‘lucanis was in a couple short stories’ harding was in the literal entire last game. and she and neve had comics#there’s obviously something to be said about character types too. a lot of people love dark and broody#vs harding keeps getting described as Girl Next Door and that’s much less popular. fine i’m not going to argue abt individual tastes#but like. neve isn’t popping off??? on the columbo fansite????#everyone’s talking about emmrich’s experiments and research but no one talks about bellara’s??#like personally. ok. lesbian opinion so take that for what it’s worth. but i don’t understand all the lucanis thirst#davrin i could understand. davrin can get it. he gets way fewer thirstposts than the other men (hmmm interesting im sure it’s nothing 🙃)#i’m just like. tired. i don’t want to say people can’t enjoy what they’re excited about#but it adds up!#i feel guilty complaining when i am also not doing a lot of Female Character Poasting but like#there’s only so much i can do as someone who can’t draw and has been too busy to keep on top of all the breaking news
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I've referenced before how I have a big google document to keep track of every media I've ever seen in my entire life (just for reference because I like to track everything possible lol… I am the Data Collector), but recently as I was updating it, I thought of actually evaluating them to find out random percentages (like for example, out of Total Shows Watched, what percentage did I finish vs. stop watching, what percentage did I like or dislike, etc.)...
Evaluating these things is made easier by the fact that I already place everything on each subsection of the list into 6 broad ranking categories, so I don't have to go back and guess to figure out how I feel about them or anything. The categories are: Ranking 5 - overall best* (despite some criticisms of course because I'm too much of an Analyzer to ever find anything Perfect lol) Ranking 4 - more positive than neutral, but not good enough to be 5 Ranking 3 - either the good + bad negate each other, OR it's just not memorable/interesting in any way enough to be ranked higher or lower (this is the Default category ALL things are placed in if no other rank applies) Ranking 2 - maybe a few redeemable elements but largely more negatives than positives Ranking 1 - So bad that it circles around to being fascinating to observe in some way (not necessarily Funny, or Good, but just interesting somehow) Ranking 0 - Bad in a genuinely frustrating or obnoxious manner
*("best" primarily defined here as most interesting, rather than most good in a technical sense, or some other measure. I tend to value more highly whether there's something novel or thoughtful about the worldbuilding, tone, writing, base premise, etc - than about whether it's actually executed perfectly.)
And here's the amount of shows that have so far been placed into each category -
TV shows ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 20 shows ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 28 shows ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 114 shows ~ Rank 2 (mid low) -33 shows ~ Rank 1 (low low but intriguingly so) - 14 shows ~ Rank 0 (iredeemably low) - 2 shows
This would make for a total of 211 TV shows overall. However, there are 57 shows within these list marked as "didn't finish" (typically meaning I quit on the very first or second episode - but log them still to keep a record that I at least had a brief view of them).
So my total of genuinely fully watched shows would be more 154. 211 Total, but a More Accurate Total of 154.
Counting them all and using the Total Number Of The List (211) -- that means roughly 9.5% of all total shows I have ever watched (or at least attempted to watch) have been Mostly Good, 13% have been Moderately Okay, 54% have been either entirely Forgettable or some mix of good + bad that lands them right in the Neutral Middle, 15.6% have been Mostly Bad, 6.6% have been Bad (but in an interesting way), and 0.9% have been Terribly Bad.
Additionally, I didn't even get past the first two episodes of about 27% of the total.
Sooo, discounting ones I didn't finish, my total TV shows ever watched in my life would be about 154 (maybe give or take a few, assuming I might have forgotten some from very long ago).
But instead of entire life, let's just say this is the total for 'About 20 Years' (so, not counting very early childhood when I likely wouldn't remember things I saw/have no detailed recollection of them (like for example, I'm sure at some point when I was like 4yrs old I must have seen an episode of Spongebob or something, but I have zero distinct memories of it, can't quote anything of it, and barely recall the premise - so I don't count it on the list, etc.)).
In that case, 154 divided by 20 would be roughly 7.7 shows a year.
Which is actually surprisingly low considering that I often have stuff on in the background for hours whilst I make sculptures and do costumes and stuff (maybe I should have also marked some distinction between 'things I fully paid attention to' and 'things I kind of half listened to whilst sculpting', but that would further split the categories too much probably lol), but I guess a lot of that is youtube videos or random documentaries, so .. eh.. maybe I get it being lower.
Now, doing the same thing for movies-
Movies ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 4 movies (3.4% of total) ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 12 movies (10.3% of total) ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 91 movies (78.4% of total) ~ Rank 2 (mid low) - 8 movies (6.8% of total) ~ Rank 1 (low but interesting) - 1 movie (0.8% of total) ~ Rank 0 (irredeemably low) - none in this category (0%)
That makes 116 for a Total (Actually Remembered) Movies Watched In Lifetime (Or At Least In 20 Years).
116 divided by 20 is roughly 5 or 6 movies a year (I feel this has probably been skewed though by adding everything since like elementary school onwards, as I remember a lot more movies from child/teen years.. Whereas, the past 3 years I feel like I've barely seen maybe even 5 movies?? lol). I also have "Didn't Finish" marked on 18 of them. Which means I quit halfway through about 15% of the total movies.
So, a for broader summary stuff..
I seem to be less forgiving to movies than tv shows, by far. Which makes sense to me, I guess, because I love elaboration and details, so "short form" things that only last an hour or two are often lost on me a bit. My biggest complaint with movies is indeed usually walking away just wishing there had been more exposition, more scenes where characters are doing nothing, more "mindless bantering" conversations, more Quiet Downtime and Lore Elaboration and so on lol, so... of course most 1-2hr films end up feeling a bit Not Enough To Draw My Interest/Nothingy to me.
If you count 5 and 4 as "like" and rankings 2 to 0 as "dislike", then for TV shows I at least somewhat liked 48 of them, and at least somewhat disliked 47 of them.. So it's almost exactly the same lol. I'm just about equally as likely to find something bad as I am to find something redeeming about it. But overall, the largest chance is that I just won't really care much for it at all and it will be tossed into the 'neutral' pile, forgotten forever. Movies have a bit better of a balance, "liking" 16 of them, and "disliking" only 9 of them. So I'm slightly more likely to enjoy a movie than to find it annoying - though still VASTLY more likely to just not find it anything in particular, possibly not even finishing it.
ANYWAY.. this is vague and literally pointless, but like I said, I just really find information fun. Like my document where I've rated every apple flavor I've ever tried (like 40 of them now?), or reviewed every oreo flavor (32?), or ranking data from my entire 10 years of Trying To Make Friends process (out of 100 people, roughly 8% chance of a moderate compatibility, 3% chance of high), or etc. etc.. I love to have random pointless things to analyze I suppose lol.
I doubt anyone tracks things in their life in this same exact way, but I'd be interested in hearing any at least somewhat similar data !!! (like, how many TV shows you watch a year on average, and what percentage of those you like vs. dislike (if you keep track of that sort of thing), etc.)). I guess it might be easier with movies, since I think some people use those websites where you curate a list of movies you've seen and you can rate them or something, so maybe the numbers are already available on those places. :0
#maybe this is my version of spotify wrapped lol.. Lifetime Media Google Doc Wrapped.. kind of.. except I'm not going over specific titles.#I can't do this with music since I rarely EVER look for new music or add to my Youtube To MP3 folder library as I just don't really#listen to music that often. When I'm working (the majority of when I seek background noise) I need like.. people's talking voices#for some reason. Just instruments and singing are not distracting enough to me to work as background noise because theyre#almost TOO in the background if that makes sense? like if I put music on then I just tune it out and it's virtually no different#than if I were daydreaming stream of consciousness thoughts in an entirely quiet room lol. And I can't really do it with books since#essentially 100% of what I read is non-fiction. usually about some specific subject or academic topic OR stuff like#1800s magazines or cookbooks or historical people's diaries. Which is not really.. the type of thing I would#rank as easily I guess? like 'ooh yeah putting the sociology textbook in my top 5 hee hee right next to the 1920s radio recipes book' lol.#Then for games... I just sadly dont play enough of them. I've been banned from new games as I've told myself I cant play anyting#long form (no rpgs or etc) until I actually finish MY OWN game first - to keep me from wasting time. so on average#I play... 0 new games a year. ToT... I do play the sims sometimes but that's really all (which is not a new game at all since#I've been playing it on and off for years). Thus I guess movies/TV are really the only things that make sense#to collect this sort of information on. I could do youtube videos I guess also but that seems kind of strange like...#giving a rating to every single video I watch in a ranked list lol.. Especially since I would say a good 85% of the time#they are exclusively background noise whilst I'm working on something or cleaning the house or etc. and not things I pay serious attention#to. There are only a few specific topics/types/creators of videos I watch where I'm ACTUALLY sitting in front of a screen paying#direct attention to the content (usually when it's educational or political things). Everything else is too mindless to even rank.#ANYWAY... ever analyzing my little hermit Weird Relationship To Media (in the sense of seemingly not processing or getting the same#things out of it as many other seem to). I think that can contribute sometimes to the whole difficulty socializing and stuff#since our culture is very centered around media consumption generally speaking. People want to talk about The New Movie that came#out or The Big TV Show Of The Year. and for me it's like.. highly likely I just plain have NOT seen it. Or if i have. statistically#I most likely was entirely ambivalent if not slightly negative towards it lol. Which just kind of takes the steam out of a 'fun' 'casual'#conversation and you seem like a bit of a bummer if most of your only feedback is either 'idk what that is' or 'oh yea... i did#see that one.... i didnt like it all that much though... I think it'd be better with elves in it.. and 7 hours longer..'' lol..#Which I am not disliking things in a 'grr i hate it bc its popular'/just to be contrarian way. I actually dislike that mindset/find it#silly (by striving so hard to be counterculture you are thus still defining yourself by the whims of external culture - just in the#opposite direction. but are still just as preoccupied with the mainstream (going against it) as everyone else. etc. lol..)) In my#case I think it IS just having niche hyperspecific tastes.. for example- it peeves me when cell phones are in media bc I dont want to be#reminded at ALL of the real world. so.. cross off anything set in modern times. so on & etc. Judging all things by these weird criteria lol
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IM FREEEEEE
#(FROM PROJECTS)#personal#the engineering chronicles#WILL HOPEFULLY NEVER NEED TO SLEEP THREE NIGHTS ON THE FLOOR OF THE ENGINEERING BUILDING AGAIN!!!#one class the final project was to build a karaoke machine which my partner and i had planned on making look like actual speakers and#microphone but we couldn’t find the stuff in time and her mom made a joke abt singing into hairbrushes and we decided to take that and#run lol we used a pink sparkly makeup box to store our circuit and cut out holes for the speakers and decorated it with makeup and put the#hairbrush mics inside and it was very fun actually and our class voted us as one of the groups to go to project day which was pretty cool!!#project day did get canceled bc of. asnow day which was unfortunate especially considering we stayed up until 4am the night before#preparing our documents for it and trying to perfect the karaoke machine when we could have been putting that time toward project number#2 😐 but whatever we still get our extra credit and i can say i qualified for it so im happy enough#then project 2 was for another class but we’re lab partners in both (+ another guy for this project) and it was digital monster pet so we#made a dragon i was mostly on design so i hand CADed the whole thing which was living hell if i never want to lay eyes on solidworks#again but also he came out very cute after MUCH hasle putting him together with all the wires and components bc our wires from the kit are#so bad they’re constantly getting disconnected from each other which we didn’t know would happen bc the labs we usually do we don’t have to#connect them together like that since you’re not routing them thru bodies etc and they’ve worked great until now but anywya.#i did the lcd faces and the light sensor and a couple other things + a lot of the code was copy and paste from past labs and fitting it to#suit the project but for the most part it was a shit ton of hardware on my end while she and the other guy managed the rest of the code#which i really wish i could have been more involved with but oh well. as it is though he’s my baby i birthed him <3 we’re planning on#meeting up over weekends next semester to change some stuff and add other extra features that we missed we got a decent grade 85% but we#all agreed we don’t want to leave him like this we want to add the extra features we had come up with and also i think we should switch out#our motors for servos bc the motors we were required to use#instead suck they’re not strong at all compared to what a servo can do for you. also we want to make it so you can not only pet him which w#already have with light sensors but also wash him with a Hall effect sensor and magnet so like we’d stick the sensor inside and the magnet#inside a little cad brush or sponge is what im envisioning and i have an expression in mind for what we’d do then. also paint him and#redesign the platform he stands on bc it’s rlly cramped and also make a pcb bc we only have him with the microcontroller and breadboards rn#and i might mess with his face piece a bit too im not sure. oh and speakers!!! those were technically a requirement but we didn’t get them#done on time but i want to make him play music sooooo bad so definitely that. anyway want to be more involved in the software when we do#all this. pretty excited actually :]
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I really do like character design in mouthwashing
Anya is obvi inspired by Shelley Duval (who was also verbally abused by Cubric, if I recall correctly), the Shining protagonist. Curly is your typical captain America style charismatic leader, he is even canonically a gym bro (although I recall you mentioning that if Curly's pre-crash face wasn't revealed, you would've headcanoned him as black, so I am a bit curios, what his dynamic w/ Jimmy would've been. Like, I think this little piece of sht would be casually racist towards him, he is just that sort of asshole. If the story was set at our times he would've def vote for Trump and complain abt immigrants eating dogs or something equally rediculous lol. Also, his dynamic w/ Anya - being marginalised himself would've he been harder on Jimbo's bullshit? Or would that not matter at all in their particular situation? So many possibilities.)
Daisuke is a bright spot in an otherwise dull and grey space. Swansea is simply perfect, 10/10😁
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I don’t think Jimmy would be racist towards Curly or anyone for that matter.
Like I don’t see Jimmy as a misanthrope. He’s not hateful just to be hateful, he’s spiteful. All of his envy and resentment of others comes from his own projection of shared aspects he feels inferior by. I think the biggest difference is it adds a little more ire to Jimmy’s sentiments as it takes away an easy aspect of Curly’s life. I assume Mouthwashing operates in a similar social history and structure as our world so Curly likely faced prejudices based on his race in this scenario. He had something extra outside of his control weighing him down and yet he still reached that highest rung.
For Jimmy it’s infuriating. It feeds that delusion that Curly has it so much easier, that he doesn’t have to do the real work to get to that space. He should’ve struggled more, he should be more bitter but he isn’t. He’s not like him still and he’s pissed about it. He still wouldn’t understand the underlying and systemic issues Curly would’ve faced cause he can’t. He wouldn’t try to because in doing that it’s an admission he’s just not trying like Curly is. Any comments that could be seen as racist are less targeted at Curly’s ethnicity but just at him. Jimmy’s issues are with Curly as a whole, being so idealic compared to him and everything around him. It’s not just one facet of him physically, mentally or emotionally that makes Jimmy so envious. It’s why he’s obsessed, it everything about him.
As for Anya, this is no anger toward you, but there’s this perception in fandom spaces with intersectionality that sharing a minority status creates an equal understanding of what exact struggles the others go through. You can understand the feeling of oppression but certain aspects of certain systems will still be misunderstood if they don’t apply to you. Curly is still a man and Anya a woman. Perhaps she is a woman of color, it think he may have been a bit harsher to Jimmy as he would be aware of the racial factors at play when it comes to the dehumanization and sexism perpetrated towards WOC but he still wouldn’t get it as a man.
It’s like apples and oranges to where they are both fruit but being categorically the same doesn’t make them identical. I can not describe to you the taste of an apple by using an orange. Anya would no more understand Curly’s struggles being black than he would her being the only woman on board. Of course they share the similarity of being the only one but even in this case we do work off the assumption everybody but Daisuke is white. He’d inherently have more solidarity with him on that aspect than her.
#I also just kinda headcanon anyone as black if there’s no canon race or physical description#blue eyes be damned it’s the future fuck it#but yeah I don’t think it’d change much but it does add to that factor of Jimmy really#not understanding the responsibilities and struggles of other especially with his black best friend#he’s the type to think having scholarships targets to minorities was weird but he’d hold his tongue on it#like I don’t think he’d vote for Trump but he just wouldn’t vote hell put his name on the balet#he’s like one of those people that don’t vote cause he feels it doesn’t matter even tho he could vote to help#those around him affected like he’s a centrist because he’s not#stupid enough to fall for right wing stuff but he’s also against the woke mob ig#mouthwashing#ask#mouthwashing game#💀 anon#jimmy mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#it’s also a thing of sort of Curly thinking those comments are bad cause they aren’t the worse you heard. like being in white dominated#spaces you hear things and develop a system of ignorance vs intentional racism#it’s not fun but it allows you to navigate them safely because no white person can understand that sort of isolation being the only BIPOC is#or just poc in general like I’ve had “friends who I’d never talk to but they were just better options than complete racists#black Curly is like that in my head where the foundation of his friendship with Jimmy is based on him not being the worst and the other#emotional abuse that is practically canon#it’s complicated but at the same time an aspect that would change so much and so little
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super fun commission for @temporalreplicsimile of his character CuddleBot! theyre so cute i can hardly stand it 💖🌻💕
#my art#basic color#commission#temporalreplicsimile#other peoples ocs#i had so much fun w this one and talking out all the little details to add was so rewarding-- the stretch marks and freckles added SO much#and the diamond shaped pupils omg i love stuff like that#thank you so much to bane for commissioning this and thank u to kiore for trusting me w CB!!! i cant wait to do more art of them#and i wont have to wait very long teehee >:o)#u can tell i was rewatching princess tutu while i worked on this one bc look at those EYELASHES
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