#like this is what happens when guys out of college get jobs through connections
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đ I cannot believe in the two weeks since I interviewed the person I'm writing my latest story on I have interviewed... Only HIM STILL! I have eight other people to interview but I could not get a hold of anyone! I got three for next week. Two I gave up on and the next three I cannot get to bc their person of contact is the most frustrating person on the planet. This story has been delayed twice already bc he will not get back to me in a timely fashion and postpones when he's sending me the info I need. I can't do this!
#i should have gone through my subject to get everyones contact info#like this is what happens when guys out of college get jobs through connections#there is no work ethic and they're in over their heads#and I am the one who needs to have all the patience#but it costs me a lot to wait around bc if I don't publish#i dont make any fucking money#we should have been on the final draft of this story this week#but i cant even write a first draft#i hate the hockey world so much rn
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Good to be Back | Cooper Adams/Abbott x F!Reader
Synopsis: You have lived across from the Adams' for what feels like ever, since you started your bachelor's degree. You notice Rachel's car peeling out of the driveway with such force it causing the ground to shake. Before you could escape back into your home, your eyes connect with Cooper's. "Care for a drink?"
Warnings: Language, Infidelity, Rough Sex, Bondage, Oral F!Receiving, Oral M! Receiving, PIV sex, Implied Age Gap (legal), Mention of Disappearances, Spanking, Choking, Daddy Kink (Heavy), F!Reader, Mentions of The Butcher
Rating: M
Author's Note: Fandom hopper oh my god...but I cannot stop thinking about Cooper Adams!!
Word Count: 5K
Tagging Moots: @rubyfruitjungle @babygorewhore @cherryinterlude @vamplreslayer (If you do want to be tagged going forth, please let me know! If not, I can remove you! (: )
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Invisible. The notion itself holds mystery. One not being seen by the world, but observing all of the tactics. It's the equivalent of being a ghost, or a fly on the wall; taking in every moment, every conversation. It can be useful, but also can be deadly. One small slip up and it was forever embedded in the air. There was no way to escape the truth when it slipped through intoxicated mouths - or fake bodies. But there is a perk to knowing everyone's dirt. Easy to manipulate, and easy to interject.
That is how your next door neighbor is, but you have no idea.
It has been so long since you were last home, God it must have been an eternity. After graduation you wanted - no needed - to get away. Something about being stuck in Philly made you ill. When the opportunity arose to get the fuck out you hopped ship faster than you were brought into this world. The freedom, independence; sights to see and a life of adventure to live. You thought that is how it would be, you were wrong.
College life wasn't as everyone made it out to be. You should've known it was bullshit from when you first stepped on campus, your roommate fucking some random on your bed. It set the entire tone, first it was your bed getting defiled, then it was your desk. Before you could even process what was happening, your life took a complete turn. That one frat party.
That's a moment you hate remembering. It was fun but the aftermath was scary enough. You were always warned about frat parties, what could arise. But being a young, naĂŻve student you had everything stacked against you. This didn't even happen in your freshman year, but your senior. Every time these guys were throwing a shindig you found yourself buried in schoolwork - wanting nothing more than to let these dudeâs fuck off. With your final year coming into play you wanted to branch out, though you wished you hadn't.
The party was fuzzy, all you remember was what you were told. But it happened so quickly - one day you're a wallflower and the next, the talk of campus. Eyes burned holes into your soul with every step you took, every glance was directed at you. You couldn't handle it. Something needed to happen, you begged to whoever was listening to give these guys the revenge they deserved. The things that they did, what was said - someone needed to take them down. In fact it only took a week, and your prayers were answered.
It was freeing, hearing around campus how those four dudeâs just disappeared. Poof, out of existence. The matter was dropped; life was normal again. Curiosity got the best of you when you heard their names, exactly who did you wish to for this to happen? Like everything else in life it all slips away, becoming of the past. Life ticked on with its duties - you couldn't let go. From the beginning to the end everything went by quickly; a college graduate and ready to take on the world.
Graduating was suppose to mean getting your dream job, working in the field that you loved - but everything took time. As you packed up your car with the memories of the last four years, you couldn't help but reminisce. Four years worth of memories and mistakes, tucked away in the cheapest cardboard boxes. Why did life have to change so much when you were just getting comfortable again? Although you will miss college it was a good riddance, now you could prep yourself for the world.
It wasn't ideal to head back to your hometown but, it was needed. Your family hasnât seen you in a while, plus job searching is better when you don't have to pay for room and board, especially in this economy. The four hour drive felt like an hour, tunes blasting through the car as you head back into the vortex. Your hometown felt like it was a time warp, one giant forcefield keeping everyone and everything in. Breaching that meant coming to terms that you, as well, might be stuck. Only for a few months, that's it.
As you turned down your old street, it felt like something straight out of a movie - it looked fake. Perfect houses with perfect families, this was some Truman show shit if you have ever seen it. Before you could get wrapped up in conspiracies, you saw your home - smiling softly as you rounded the corner. Pulling into the driveway there was a heavy shroud on your chest - things were out of place. Fixating on the note from the garage door you saw only a glimmer of what it said:
Going to be out of town for a month for our retirement trip. Love you, be safe!
âGreatâ, you thought. Just when you wanted to see your family they were gone. There was something naughty about having the house all to yourself, not worrying about anyone barging in. A smirk spread across your lips whilst shutting your car off, wrapping your lanyard in your palm. Breaking you out of your thoughts was the door slamming, screaming followed behind. It was instinctual to not be nosy, but let's face it. As you slid out of the driver's seat, you slowly reached for the backdoor - peering over to see who exactly was yelling. For a split second you caught the image of a man and woman yelling at one another while a boy and a girl sat in the backseat. Cocking an eyebrow, you leaned forward a bit more to peer out your back window.
Cooper Adams and his wife Rachel were exchanging some very colorful words, your eyes shot wide open at their argument. It felt wrong to listen in, but they didn't have to know. You bit your top lip in anticipation of what he would say next, but before the argument could officially commence, Rachel was slamming the driverâs door - and speeding so fast out of the driveway it left marks across yours. Seeing how close the car got to you made you jump, smacking your head against the roof of the car. Backing out you rubbed the swollen top, holding back tears.
Peering across the street, Cooper ran his hands through his brown locks - tugging hard. There was something sexy about how mad he was, frustrated even - but it hurt your heart. You've known Cooper since you were in college, considering that's when he moved here. All you knew was that he was a firefighter - nothing more and nothing less. There were a few occasions when you found yourself looking for the fire departmentâs calendars â for research purposes. Mr. October happened to be your favorite. Cooperâs gaze caught yours, showing a bit of embarrassment. He didn't think anyone was around to see what happened. Giving him a sweet wave, you smiled small in condolence at what you witnessed. He didn't return your gesture, remained at the end of your driveway - his hands fixated on his hips. "I'm sorry you had to witness that."
His words pierced deep, something about the low tone sent sparks through your body. The way his broad shoulders squared up to yours. His fucking stance in itself made you want to drop. Those impure thoughts flew through your mind as he stared at the ground, awaiting your response. Catching on you shook your head, leaning back against your car. "Don't be sorry, are you okay?" Cooper saw this as an invitation to move forward, his hands in his front pockets. When he was in front of you, he couldn't look in your eyes - instead focusing on his home. The way he held himself was strict, he was so tense all the time. It was understandable with the line of work he did but this was different, he was frustrated. "I'll be okay - back from school so soon?"
He changed the subject as fast as he sauntered over to you, not wanting to focus on the negative. You shot Cooper a smile as you held your house key from your lanyard, motioning to your car filled with boxes. "I'm officially done, graduated last week." This was the first time you saw Cooper smile since you've been home - heat rushing to your cheeks. In a way you felt as if he was reading you, browsing through your entire life story off of one sentence. Lost in your own train of thought you didn't realize how close he got, his shoulders parallel to yours - boxing you in. His right hand placed on top of the roof, dangerously close to your head. Swallowing down every ounce of dignity you had. His russet brown eyes poured over every inch of you, tracing you through the clothing.
"Congratulations, I hope you got spoiled for that big accomplishment." Honey, that was the best way to describe his tone. Molasses and honey flowing in a splendid river, drowning you with every syllable. His musk - fennel and pine radiating off of him made your stomach flip, muscles contracting. You had no control over your body anymore, it was like a flip was switched. You watched as Cooper trailed his left hand over your arm, dragging his nails against the grain. His right hand fell to your neck, fingers resting at the base whilst his thumb rubbing circles by your throat. With a hard grasp, he pulled you forward - inches away from your face. "Did you get spoiled, sweetheart?â
Words could not form, no matter how hard you tried to muster them out. All you could do was shake your head as a form of no. Both of your hands fell slack to your sides, growing clammy by the second. Cooper was not happy with your answer, pouting playfully as he dug his thumb harder against your neck, causing your breath to hitch. It was a huge accomplishment, but you didn't want people to go out of their way to celebrate it. So, after you went to commencement you had a small lunch with your close family, then went back to your off campus apartment. Nothing too out there, enough to satisfy you. "Will you let me spoil you, and be a good girl?" His words made you weaker, slumping slightly into his touch. You couldn't shake the fight you saw earlier, how angry they both were. This was proof Cooper needed to blow off steam but, you felt guilty. A married man, father of two - you didn't want to intervene. "Baby, I'm getting divorced - that's what the fight was about."
That was enough for you to lean up to his lips, pressing your body flush against his. There was something about being out in the open for everyone to see that made your body burn hotter. There was a chance you could be caught by anyone. Cooper felt it too, but it was too good to stop, you were too intoxicating. His large, calloused hands slid across your lower back to drape around your ass, cupping it like it was the last thing his hands would ever do. Entangled in the pleasure you let a hearty moan slip from your mouth to his, the bulge pressing harder against your thigh. Delicate hands laced their way to the back of Cooperâs neck, scratching over the tender skin. He licked at your bottom lip, begging for entrance. Obeying his silent command you parted your lips, bringing your left leg up higher to lace around his waist.
The taste of whipped cream on his breath drove you mad, his scent lingering in your nostrils as he passionately kissed you - growing harder with each motion. You couldn't handle it anymore as you grinded down against his bulge, lightning shooting through your core. Cooperâs hand slid from your throat to the base of your neck, tangling his fingers in your soft strands. With a single twist of his hand, he yanked your hair back - making you gaze into his eyes. A devilish smirk rested upon his lips, swollen from how hard he made out with you. A small whimper left your mouth, tiny enough to show you turned on you were by his actions. The hand that was once secured to your side pulled your keys out, waving the lanyard in your face. "Lead the way." He smirked, draping the lanyard down the valley of your breast - watching your shudder at the feeling.
You reached up to snatch your keys away, swaying your hips as you headed for the front door. Cooper sat back to watch how your ass shook with every step, wanting to take you right then and there on the lawn. Bringing his hand down he began to palm himself, trying to relieve some of the tension his cock was holding. Out of the corner of your eye you could see it too - causing your core to ignite. To tease him further you arched your back - pushing your ass out enough to wiggle it as you slid your key in. When you least expected it, the hard crack of Cooperâs hand came down across your backside; you swore it echoed through the neighborhood.
The yelp that left your mouth was masked with Cooperâs hand, gripping at your face so hard you felt it against your teeth. Without any more effort you spun the doorknob to the left, kicking it open. Cooper ushered you inside with haste, the hard oak door slamming into its respected slot. You have never seen a man be this passionate, this rough - it made you ache all over. Standing in the foyer of your home, you gulped as you watched Cooperâs eyes blacken. There wasn't an immediate danger lurking between you both, but it felt like it - he looked as if he was going to snap. Biting hard on your first finger, you tried to jet away towards your room - to not avail. It was like Cooper read your mind - knowing exactly what you were going to do. "Now princess, where the hell do you think you're going?"
His large, calloused hand came down on your right wrist - yanking it behind your body as you pushed you into the wall separating the kitchen from the dining room. You could hear the metallic clank of his belt coming undone, groaning at the sound. Prepping yourself for the feeling of his hardened cock against your thigh, you slid your ass out a bit more - only to earn a hearty smack to the reddened flesh. "Fucking Christ, you enjoy being a brat?" The sinister smirk on his lips sent sparkles through your eyes, hearing just how lust filled he was becoming. The cold, smooth leather of his belt slid against your wrist. With a rough tug, Cooper slid your left wrist into the makeshift cuffs - cranking the end of the belt back so your hands were snug. As his fingers left your leather-clad wrists, Cooper came up to lace his fingers through your hair - ever so gently pulling you back to his mouth. His musk invaded your senses as his free hand trailed down your front - paying the softest attention to your throat. You couldn't help but slide your eyes closed at the feeling, wanting more.
Taking you out of your moment was your body being forced away from the wall, pushing you along until you were face to face with the marble countertop. This was new, must have been one of the new renovations. There was a second where Cooper completely let go of you, watching as you stood eyes forward - not daring to look back. The anticipating was killing you; you needed his touch. Sweat slid down your brow as you tried to shake your hair out of your face, letting your heart calm for a minute. The warm grasp of Cooper Adams returned but, in a harsher way. He didn't warn you when he yanked your shorts down, pooling them around your ankles. Without being told you kicked them off, wanting them far away. The cold air of your home ran through the heat produced between your legs, never realizing your panties were discarded as well.
Lost in the thought of how your core ached, Cooper had the advantage - tossing you up onto the new countertop, legs spread wide open. "Is my good girl aching for me?" You couldn't help but chew on your lip at his words, the praise shocking your cunt. Nodding gently, you batted your eyelashes in his direction - watching as his drank up your appearance. His fingertips returned to your thighs, pushing hard into the skin - knowing it was going to bruise tomorrow. Slowly he massaged his fingers upwards, draping them over your inner thighs - ghosting over your hot cunt. It was driving you mad, you needed - wanted his touch, his mouth, his everything.
The bucking of your hips into his hand only caused the fury to set itself onto Cooper, his eyes narrowing to your face. Slamming his right hand onto the countertop next to your thigh, he reached forward with his left to grip at your neck, pulling you fast towards him. "Words, use your words." Your pupils were blown out, no color except black showed. The way your expression held lust only made Cooper grow harder - wanting you more than anything. "Y-yes, Daddy." The name came out with a smirk, eyeing him up and down. Cooperâs grip on your neck got tighter, pressing his plump lips flush against yours. The heat of the kiss made you moan into his mouth, wanting him to know what effect he had on you. As the kiss got deeper he slid his hands away, unbuckling the cuffs on his shirt as he dragged the long sleeve's back, exposing his forearms. Cooper trailed his hands down to his slacks, pulling them off with ease - brief's following right behind. The slap of his erect cock against his stomach made you moan, eyes widening at his size.
"Daddy, y-you're so big..." You couldn't help but stare at his length, the wetness of your core seeping down to the counter. He would break you, split you in half - he will be the biggest cock you have ever taken. There was something ignited in Cooper when your eyes cascaded over his length, his ego growing - knowing he was big. Hearing you say it only made him ache harder. Licking his lips as he pulls back from your mouth, he pulled your ass to the edge of the counter - leaving sloppy kisses on your inner thighs, red marks littering the soft skin. With your hands pressing into your back, all you could do was whimper to Cooper - puppy dog eyes boring into his. "I need you to be loud for Daddy, okay? Don't hold back."
Obeying Cooperâs command, you braced yourself as his hot tongue slid up your seam - flat against your slit. The feeling in itself made you want to jump, stuttering your hips into his mouth. Cooper did not like that, pinning your hips down to the counter with his massive hands. He made sure to never leave your eyes, especially as he bit right where the crease of your pelvis met your thigh - tugging at the skin. You could feel your eyes rolling into the back of your head as he dove back into your steaming cunt, lapping at your arousal. Cooper was a pussy eating champ, you fucking knew it just by how he sucked your clit - rolling it in between his teeth and lips. The attention he was paying your nerve bundle made your whole body flop. You couldn't moan, no - screams were leaving your throat. Each swipe of his long tongue had you falling apart - enough to where Cooper slammed you back down onto the counter. The grunt he let out into your cunt made your orgasm approach quickly. Bucking your hips up, you let a string of whimpers slide out, signaling how close you were. "C-Coop⌠I-I-I'm gonna...."
"What did you just call me?" Cooper pulled his head back from your thighs, your essence glistening upon his lips. One of his eyebrows cocked in your direction, rubbing little circles into your hips. It was painful how fast your orgasm approached, but not letting it burst. The torture Cooper was pushing onto you made you want to cry. You could help but grind your hips against the air - hoping to at least reach that point you once were at. "Brats don't get to come." He tsked into your ear, biting on your lobe. You couldn't help but pout as you strained yourself, wanting something to help take you to the brink. "D-Daddy please...I-I need your mouth."
Cooper pulled you off of the counter, shaking his head at you. The tears swelling in the corner of your eyes made him soften for a moment, rubbing your cheek with his thumb. Even though he was dominating you in everyway you needed, he didn't want to push you into something you may not have wanted. With a stray tear that fell, he made sure to kiss it away - peppering sweet kisses all over your face. Rubbing into his lips, you licked yours - lowering yourself to your knees. Lurching forward you returned his kisses to his hips, thighs and lower stomach - making sure to never break eye contact. "L-Let me make it up to you, Daddy."
Before you could let Cooper respond, you licked one singular line up his shaft - watching at his thick length twitched against your lips. As you came to the top you let your tongue swirl over his swollen tip - lapping up his precum. Cooper couldn't help but slam his eyes shut - wrapping his fingers in your hair to make a ponytail. Opening your mouth all the way, you let Cooper position your mouth over his tip. Nodding in anticipation, Cooper slammed your mouth down onto him - taking him fully in. It was way too much for your to grasp - choking slightly on the girth of him. Tears spilled from the corners of your eyes as you hollowed your cheeks out - suctioning tightly around him. "Oh fuck, princess..." He tossed his head back as he moaned out, jetting his hips back into your face.
This was a new sensation for you, never ever being face fucked. With Cooper it felt so natural, your undying hunger strengthened with every thrust. The way his tip slid against the back of your throat made the butterflies in your stomach erupt. You couldn't handle it anymore, feeling your wetness sliding down your weakened thighs. With every bob of your head against Cooperâs cock it shot electricity through your nerves, wanting him more than anything. Through tearful eyes you watched his expression - how his forehead scrunched up, his bottom lip pulled taut between his teeth. He was trying so hard to suppress his moans for you, but it was sexier hearing them. Lightly you dragged your teeth up his shaft, causing him to pan his eyes back down at you. Cooper humped himself into your face with such aggression it made you gag more, spit dripping from your mouth over your clothed chest. As you clamped your eyes shut to breathe through your nose, you felt how his hips stuttered - shooting his creamy rope right down your throat. With weakened thrusts, he slowly started to ease out of you, rubbing his thumb over your wet chin. "Such a good little princess for Daddy, you did a great job." He cooed, placing a kiss to your forehead. The praise shot right into your cunt.
"Now it's Daddy's turn - I want you to cum on my cock. Can princess do that for me?" The eagerness to your nod made Cooper laugh at how adorable it was, helping you up to your feet. As he spun you around like the princess you are, he pressed your face into the cold countertop - it felt so good on your warm cheeks. The feeling of his toned legs kicking your open made you squirm, arching your back ever so slightly for him. Cooper leaned forward, pressing his lips to your shoulder as his cock slides between your folds, gathering your wetness on his shaft. The way he pressed his tip into your clit had you moaning out ripples, it couldn't - no - wouldn't stop. Each slow thrust of his hips caused your body to jolt, not even fully given in yet. Just then, with a snap of his hips - he sheathed his thick cock inside your wet heat. The scream you let out was enough to break the wine glasses sitting on the countertop - it felt so fucking good!
"I bet those college boys couldn't fuck you like Daddy can. Am I right princess?" He didn't give you time to adjust as he plowed into you from behind, scratching his way to your shoulder and back. The pain mixing with pleasure made you rock your entire body against him - wanting to hold and caress his form. Your wrists writhed against the leather belt, still bound from earlier. Cooper saw you struggling - taking that as his cue to release your hands. The way they flopped to your side felt unreal as he demolished your pussy. Gaining your strength back, you pressed against the countertop, pushing your hips back to meet Cooperâs thrust. "N-never, y-y-you fuck me way better, Daddy. I-I can't get enough of your b-big cock!"
Your words had Cooper laughing sinisterly - lust lacing his tone. It became too much to deal with, his dirty words flowing through your brain as his cock hit that spongy spot within you. From the way you were angled you could feel everything. The way his tip punched your cervix without a care, how your walls tightened around his girthy shaft. How with every thrust you felt your entire body come undone. Nothing in life brought you as much bliss as Cooper was, this was your whole world. You have been fantasizing about Mr. Adams ever since you first laid your eyes upon him. Now you had him where you needed, and you were never going to lay off. "Princess, I-I'm gonna-" Before Cooper could finish his sentence, he was coming undone within you. Ropes of his sweet seed painting your walls - this is when you were thankful for having an implanted contraceptive. Feeling his seed shooting in you was enough for your orgasm to spray - drenching his cock with so much force. The moans, groans and whimpers slipping from yourself and Cooper echoed throughout your vacant home - this was the best day of your life.
Cooper pulled out of you with ease, rubbing his gentle fingers across your behind. Every stroke made you weak, feeling like jelly under his grasp. Pulling you upwards to his chest, he swept you up bridal style as he made his way to your living room, seeing the new conversation pit your parents had installed. It was essentially like a giant bed with seats, causing you to laugh lightly into Cooperâs chest. As he stepped down the stairs, he pulled blanket from one of the seats over you both, pulling you closer to him. Turning around to face him, you wrapped your left leg over his, rubbing small circles into the stubble lining his chin. The moment was perfect, too perfect. The way Cooper looked at you with so much admiration and love, made your entire soul flutter. "It was me." He mumbled out, looking at you with no emotion to his words. It was like his body was taken over by an unseen force, his hand going ridged against your side. "What was you?"
He let out a gentle sigh, chewing on the inside of his cheek, never leaving your gaze. He was debating heavily if he should tell you, or leave it alone. But it felt wrong to not let you know. He slid his hand to cup your cheek, kissing you as soft as silk - lingering over your swollen lips. His large hand cupping your back as well, drawing patterns with his thumb as he let those forbidden words out; "Those guys at the frat party, I made them disappear." His words make you go stiff, eyes widening as you realize what he did. The ones who hurt you, who humiliated you earlier last year - Cooper disposed of them. Your breath grew more erratic as you realized what was going on, there was only one question flowing through your brain. "Did you...did you kill them?" It was weird, you should've felt afraid - but you felt the opposite, safe and sound within Cooper Adamsâ arms.
"Yes, for you. They were going to get away with what they did to you, and I didn't want that to happen. I wanted them to feel the fear you did. I wanted them to feel the way they made you feel, I only want to protect you from the evil this world holds." Little did you know, Cooper was the evil this world held. He was after all, The Butcher.
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Welcome to the Dollhouse
Summary: Y/n is down on their luck making financial ends meet. When a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity forces them into a bargain that can't refuse. Now, they find themselves at a party searching for a partner but the person they get is someone they'd never expect.
Notes: Male Reader, Dubious Contracts, Financial Struggles, Idol Jay, Enhypen exists, Fake names, Kissing
Wordcount: 6.9k
Itâs funny to think about how much money can buy. Many people say it canât buy happiness, love, or fulfillment. But when push comes to shove. Money makes the world go roundâŚ
Being in college was all you wanted. A chance to get an education that was enough to get you away from the boring life that awaited you if you decided to miss out. Moving to a big city, far away from your parents wasnât even the hard part. It was paying for college⌠You managed to land a decent scholarship, as long as you did your school work and did some volunteering to make the school look good then youâd be safe to coast through without any worries. Or that was the case. In your second semester of freshman year, one picture put you dead in the water.
It was your first party. No parents to worry about what time youâd be back. Friends watch you in case things get too crazy. And a cute guy who invited you. A frat boy.By the end of the night, videos of you drinking online circulated. And being a year under the drinking age wasnât a good look either. The school tore away your scholarship, you were lucky they didnât expel you. You didnât have the heart to tell your parents what happened, so you had to find a way to pay for school alone. You looked for private loans, but most wouldnât accept you without a guarantor, someone to pay them back if you couldnât. And working odd jobs wouldnât earn you enough money before the next semester. Thatâs where The Dollhouse entered the picture.Â
This was the sixth bank youâd visited. You were desperate. Waiting for the subway, you were approached by a man in a long black coat. He was older than you, but not by much, his early thirties max. He wore a black shirt and pants, with black hair to match. He was almost like a shadow⌠if shadows were handsome men. âExcuse me, you dropped this!â He exclaimed as he rushed over to you. He had your phone in his hand, ready to offer it to you.
You mustâve dropped it at the bank. âThank you so much! Iâd be dead without this.â
âYou should be more careful! You never know what kind of people youâll meet. Stranger Danger and all that.â
You giggled. He sounded like your Dad saying that. âArenât you a stranger?â
He tilted his head to the side, pondering your point. âI suppose so. You can call me Seo-jun.â
âIâm y/n. Sorry for making you chase me here, and thanks again for bringing me my phone.â
He shook his head. âItâs no problem. I have to go this way for work anyway.â
âWhat kind of job do you have?â
âIâm sorta like a manager. I help connect people looking for work with clients looking for workers.â Seo-jun smiled wryly. âBut right now, business is down. Some workers quit recently, and our clients want more new faces.â
You felt a pang in your stomach. Youâd been cutting out meals to save money and your job was still only paying minimum wage. Considering you had a bit of free time, you took a chance. âI could lend a hand. I could use the money, and you did help me. Itâs only fair that I return the favor.â
Seo-junâs smile faded a bit. âUm⌠Youâre a nice kid. But I donât think our work is good for you.â
Originally you were offering just to be nice, but now your interest was piqued. âW-Why not?âÂ
âDonât be like that. You look like a hard worker, but itâs not ordinary work. The paychecks are nice, but Iâd hate to see such a good kid like you work there.â
âHow well does it pay?â
âThatâs beside the pointââ
âHow much does it pay!?â You demanded.
âDepending on your client. After fees from management, Iâve seen some workers make over $4,000 in less than a week of work.â Seo-jun sighed.
4k in a week could set you up for the entire semester before the end of the summer, and then some! âTake me to work with you! Please!â Seo-jun tried not to look you in the eye, but you gripped his arm and refused to let go. âThen youâll have to walk with me there. Iâll just talk to your boss.â
âWoah, woah. Iâll take you there, just donât make a scene. People are staring,â He whispered, trying to peel you off him.
Thankfully it wasnât too far of a train ride. You spent it wondering what kind of work theyâd had you do. You werenât well-dressed, having sold off most of your nice clothing. Maybe if there were uniforms, then your clothes wouldnât be much of a problem. Seo-jun was silent for most of the ride, texting someone. His face was dark, which made his face stand out more. He wasnât just pretty, he was extremely handsome. His black hair settled on his forehead and dipped slightly past his eyebrow making him even more attractive. The type of look no one could get enough of. And a few of the girls on the train agreed with you, from how they stared.
Seo-jun guided you off the train after another five stops. You walked a few blocks, turned a corner, and approached a black building wedged between two pale ones. Before knocking, Seo-jun looked at you. âAre you sure?â
You nodded. âI think I can handle it.â You were a bit nervous. There werenât many people on this street, and the building was tall and imposing in the quiet neighborhood.
Seo-jun knocked on the door. It cracked open, and a big man with tattoos peeked through the crack. Once he registered who was at the door, it closed again before opening completely. Seo-jun said nothing as he entered the building, and you closely followed behind him. The large man shut the door behind you. Now you saw him completely, he looked more like an NFL player. He could easily throw you around if he wanted to. Seo-jun didnât pay the man any mind, walking forward as he passed several doors. Each had a sign on it. Most said open and a few said occupied. The doors were closed and looked pretty heavy. It was so quiet, you could only hear the sounds of your footsteps on the tile. Seo-Jun led you to an office at the end of the hallway, putting in a key from his pocket and unlocking it. He sat down behind the desk, which was covered with papers.Â
âCome in and take a seat, y/n.âÂ
You sat down in the chair in front of the desk. The room had a red velvet wall, and pictures of models. Or at least, they seemed like models. All of them were men in their early twenties, each was different but handsome. You even saw one that looked like Seo-Jun.
âIs that you?â You pointed at the photo.
Seo-Jun didnât look. âNot anymore. That was a long time ago.â You raised an eyebrow. He looked almost the same in the photo as in front of you. But maybe it wasnât the best time to push him to spill more.Â
âWhy are you looking for money?â Seo-Jun questioned.
âCollege. Itâs expensive, ya know?â
He scoffed. âYeah. I know. Donât you have parents, or any other family who can help?â
You shook your head. âThatâs not an option.â Thinking about your family left a bitter taste in your mouth. Theyâd be so disappointed if they knew how bad things had gotten.
He pursed his lips like he understood the feeling. âHow much money do you need?â
âIdeally, enough for school.â
âGive me a number.â
âItâs about $10k a semester. More if I live on campus.â
âOkay, and when schoolâs not in session, do you have a place to live? Around here, specifically.â You shook your head. You caught yourself about to talk about your family home, but maybe it was best not to⌠Seo-Jun typed a few things on a calculator on his phone, opened a laptop, and waited for it to start. âOkay. If you start working with us, it's like this. Weâll give you the money and other necessities you need, and you have to work off that amount.â
âYouâll give me the money?â
âIâll have you log into your student account, and Iâll pay your semester in advance now. But thatâs only if you accept our offer.â
âOf course!â
Seo-Jun sighed. âPlease hear me completely before you decide.â He straightened his back as he pulled the laptop closer to him. He typed a few things before turning the computer around, and showing you the screen. It was a camera feed. âThis is what we do.â
You watched closely. It looked like a guy your age was in a room with another person. They were talking. You were about to look away, shrugging it off before you saw the boy kneel on the ground. He was doing something to the older manâs pants. You leaned in to see, but the camera wasnât clear enough.
âWhat is this?â
âThis is the job. Be a partner for your clients, whatever that means for them. Then theyâll pay you for the service.â Seo-Junâs jaw went slack. âLike I said, this isnât an ordinary job. But if you take it, weâll take care of you. Youâll have a home and meals, and weâll keep our end of the bargain and pay for school.â
You sat back in your chair as the reality of the offer landed on you. Being hired, partner⌠A fancy way to say, prostitute. Was this really the only way?
âI know that you donât want to pressure your family with your financial situation. And Iâll be honest, we didnât bump into each other by mistake.â Seo-Jun pulled your phone out of his pocket.
You didnât even realize youâd dropped itâŚ
âYou didnât drop it. I stole it. I needed an excuse to talk to you, and for you to trust me. I know youâve been looking for loans, but canât get any.â Seo-Jun leaned forward, placing his elbows on the desk. âWe need workers, and you need our help. Or⌠does your sweet mother wanna hear about your scholarship?â
A cold sweat ran down your neck. Youâd walked right into a cage and didnât even realize it. âWhat scholarship?â You gulped.
âThe one you lost. Itâs a shame. How one mistake can ruin everything for you, isnât it?â Seo-Jun put a video on the laptop, the same one that ruined your chances of living a normal college life. âWe can make it so the video never sees the light of day again, as a bonus for signing with us. You wonât have to worry about mommy seeing it, or knowing how you lost your scholarship. Youâll have school paid for, and have time to study. All you need to do is be a worker.â Seo-Jun pulled a piece of paper from a stack on his desk, a pre-printed contract, with your name at the top. âYou can read through it if youâd like. Everything I promised is in there.â
Seo-Jun placed the paper on the desk, sliding it toward you, with a pen on top.
âHow can you do this to people?â You mumbled.
âItâs never easy. I did try to give you a warning, but you insisted.â
âThat was before I knew this!â You wanted to throw the paper at him and storm out, but your legs were glued to the seat. This was a once-in-a-lifetime offer.
âIâll also mention. Any extra âgiftsâ you get from your clients will be yours to keep. Frequently, we get high-profile clients who love to have specific partners they visit. And they bring them gifts every time they visit; from clothes and jewelry to cars and even buildings.â Seo-Jun stood from his seat, walking around the desk to lean on it close to you. âItâs a good deal. Fair and transparent. If youâre lucky, youâll be out fast. And your identity is completely concealed within our walls. No one will ever know you worked here unless we want them to know.â He picked up your hand and the pen, placing them together. âSo, whatâs the call?â
Your jaw was so tight, you struggled to speak, âC-Can I sleep on this?âÂ
âNo. Once you walk out the door, the offerâs gone.â He said flatly.
The pressure was too much. You couldnât think of anything. There was no real way out, and this was too good of an offer to pass. Even if you refused, how could you afford the new semester? You sighed heavily before moving the pen to the paper, slowly signing your name. The red ink flowed on the paper, drying into a deep crimson like you were using your blood to sign.
âExcellent. As of today, youâre a part of the Dollhouse.â Seo-Jun snatched the paper off the desk, folding it and tucking it into his back pocket. âHereâs this back,â He handed your phone back to you. âOne more thing, if you violate our contract or try to run. Weâll drag your ass back here faster than you can blink. If not then your parents will have to pay off the loan.â
Your head hung. Guilt sat on your shoulder as you leaned back in the chair. This was your fate nowâŚ
Seo-Jun handed you a card. âYouâll go back to your dorm. When you do, call this number and answer whatever questions they ask. Weâll have to come by in about a week for measurements.â
âWhat measurements?â
âWe need your body measurements to advertise you. And weâll have to dress you, give you a nice haircut, and dress you up. Which, the Dollhouse will pay for. This will add to your debt, naturally.â
âI-I donât want it then!â
âIf you donât look nice, no one will ask for you. If not, then you wonât make any money. If you make us no money, youâll be stuck in our arrangement for a while.â Seo-Jun frowned. âI donât enjoy this, so letâs make this as easy as possible. Thereâs an event next week where new clients can meet our workers clandestinely. Itâs like a mixer, speed-dating. Thatâs your best way to get a high-roller on your account to support you.â
You rolled your eyes. âThis is so stupid. Why would anyone pick me anyway?â
Seo-Jun glared at you. âDo not talk about yourself like that. If you start looking down on yourself, clients can tell you donât value yourself. If you can value yourself, how can you value them?â
Seo-Jun sent you back on your way, giving you directions back home. The ride back home felt like hours. All you could do was try not to cry. You tried so hard to come to the city to be someone different than how you couldâve been back home, but it wasnât supposed to be like this. You got back to your dorm. It was dark and quiet, just like that building. You were lucky enough not to have any roommates. No one to hear you cry yourself to sleepâŚ
In the morning, you woke up as your phone rang. You rolled over, ignoring the call. But it rang, again and again. After the fourth phone call in a row, you looked at it. It was an unknown number.
You answered cautiously. âH-Hello?â
âY/n? Have you lost your mind?â Seo-Jun said, with disappointment in his tone.
âHow did you get this number?â
âI stole your phone. I knew I had to get your number too. Just in case you ran off.â He sighed. âI thought you did for a moment. That wouldâve been a lot of trouble for the both of us⌠Why didnât you call me when you got home?â
Youâd completely forgotten about calling the number on the card. âSorry. It slipped my mind.â
âLetâs get rid of that habit. Being forgetful isnât cute. Some clients will call you at different times of the day and donât take kindly to being ignored. Youâve got a job thatâs busier than full-time. Itâs 24/7.â
âWell, what do you want, Seo-Jun?â
âWhen weâre talking business, please call me Mr. Seo-Jun.â
You groaned but knew he wasnât joking. âWhat do you want, Mr. Seo-Jun?â
âI need you to tell me your school login. I want to see your schedule for classes and pay your bill.â You told him without any fuss. You were too tired to give a damn anymore. âThereâs a good boy. Now, you can go back to the rest of your week. Iâll keep in touch.â
Seo-Jun hung up before you could answer him. It was Wednesday, meaning your classes started later in the day. You took your time showering and picking out clothes. It was thirty minutes before class when you went to the bus stop. Like clockwork, your friend, Eun, waited for you to arrive.
Eun was a friend you made during the first semester of college. He was 5â9â and goofy, often laughing at his jokes like a comedy club. He probably heard a laugh track in his head when he told jokes. He usually dressed in bright-colored shirts, denim jeans, and a big smile. He was also there for you when youâd gone through the frat party fiasco. Most of your âfriendsâ had ditched you, throwing you under the bus for drinking to save their necks. But Eun was the only one who stayed by your side.
Eun waved at you as you walked toward him. âGood morning!â
âMorning, Eun.â
He studied your face for a moment. âYeesh, what happened? You look like you had a rough sleep.â
âThanks, buddy. You always know just what to sayâŚâ You sighed as you looked up at the sky.
âI wasnât trying to be funny. Seriously dude, are you okay?â
You nodded. âIâm fine.â
âIf youâre sure⌠then, youâll wanna hear about how Enhypen are coming to the area to perform.â
Your eyes bulged. âEnhypenâs coming here!? No fucking way, when!?â
âThe news dropped this morning. Theyâre holding a small concert on campus around next week!âÂ
Your stomach churned. Next week!? Thatâs when the mixer was supposed to be. Maybe you could ask Seo-Jun for a day off to attend the concertâŚ
Eun saw your smile drop. âHey, dude, seriously. Whatâs going on? Normally youâre super excited about this kind of stuff.â
âI am. Iâve got some stuff happening next week, so I hope they donât overlap.â You prayed that it would be some swift joke that would pass you byâŚ
The next few days passed, and you kept a close eye on your phone. Not a single call or text from your new boss. Or would your owner be the right word? You checked your school login a few days ago, and your school bill for the next semester was already paid in advance. It was good to know Seo-Jun was a man of his word. But it also meant that everything else heâd said would pass too. It wasnât until Monday that you got some news.Â
The Enhypen concert was on a Friday. Which made sense, students would stay on campus all the time. So why not have a concert that night? However, your morning was disturbed by a call. You answered it immediately.
âHello?â
âGood job answering the first time. Youâre learning.â You could hear the smirk on his face.
âLetâs get to the part where you tell me what you want.â
âTo the point it is. The date of the mixer is set to be this Friday night, itâll be pretty late so get your homework done in time.â
You rolled your eyes. âLike you care about my schoolwork.â
âOf course I do. Iâm the one paying for it.â
âWhat time exactly is the mixer?â
âWhy?â Seo-Jun questioned.
âWell, thereâs a concert happening on campus and I wanted to goââ
Seo-Jun sucked his teeth. âNo. Youâre expected to be here before sunset so we can get you ready. Tardiness will only put the whole team behind schedule, and some clientâs time is precious.â
âButââ
âBe here. Friday. After class. Bye.â Seo-Jun hung up without another word.
You huffed a heavy sigh as you texted Eun that you wouldnât attend the concert. Naturally, he was concerned about why and questioned you, but you lied about having a family matter to attend to. He promised to take videos for you at least. It left you feeling like a dog on a leash. Any time Seo-Jun pulled on it, you had no choice but to follow his orders. In the days before the mixer, he asked you more questions about the style of clothes youâd enjoy, strengths, weaknesses, talents, quirks, birthmarks, anything you hated, and even your allergies.
On Friday, after your last class. There was a black SUV waiting outside your dorm. Walking past the suspicious car, the window rolled down. âJust going to ignore me?â Seo-Junâs voice whistled out. You turned to see him sitting in the back seat. âGet in. Time for fitting.â
âI just got home. Donât I get to change or something?â
âDoes it matter? Youâd just be changing just to change again. Youâll have time to relax while waiting for the mixer to start.â You got in the car, tossing your backpack in. The car was nice. You didnât recognize the driver.Â
Seo-Jun handed you a folder. âDoes everything in here look right?â
You opened it. It was almost like a resume, all about you. From an approximate height and weight to even an ethnicity check. âHow did you guess my ethnicity? I didnât tell you that.â
He shrugged. âThe internet is a scary place. If youâve put it somewhere online before, it's on the dark web.â They closed the folder and tucked it into a briefcase. âSo, let me explain the mixer a bit. Generally, it's an event for our workers to meet new clients. But also for some of our clients to show off to their rich buddies and convince them to invest in our services. Be presentable, flexible, and obedient to earn attention.â Out of the briefcase, Seo-Jun produced pictures of young men pandering to their clients. âNow, we never call our clients âclientsâ to their face. Theyâre our partners. And youâll need a persona. Something thatâs already similar to who you are so you donât need to act too much. Some like them feisty, others like our boys a little more submissive.â
âHow do I come up with one?â
âDonât, just be you and they will. Once youâve got one, then stick to it. The savior types might be your best bet, so maybe youâll get them with a sort of damsel persona.â
âSavior types?â
âThe ones who get off on the fact theyâre helping you. Like theyâre the only ones who ever could, so you need them to save you.â
There was so much nuance to this⌠It made your head hurt just thinking about it.Â
Seo-Jun studied your expression. âItâs your first one, so donât worry about standing out. Youâll be standing with the newbies, like a puppy in an adoption bin. All the newbies are workers without a regular client, so theyâre a bit cutthroat when someone gets close.â
âAnything else?â You sighed as you scrolled through your phone.
Seo-Jun leaned forward and snatched it, putting it inside his briefcase.âAlso, you can't use phones. Youâll be engaged the whole time, so we canât risk distractions. And we canât let you take any photos of anyone.âÂ
You grumbled as you looked out of the heavily tinted windows. The rest of the car ride was silent, even the car didnât make much noise. After the car ride, you were escorted into the Dollhouse. Upstairs were the living quarters for all the âDollsâ as Seo-Jun called them. You were now one of the Dolls of his house. Each doll was awarded their room. Some got to move out if their clients bought them a place to stay, but they werenât allowed to leave the city without permission. And, each doll had a name. Something theyâd go by. Your new name, Minsu, means Elegant and Beautiful according to Seo-Jun.Â
âOkay. From now on, anytime youâre in the dollhouse or with a client, youâll be called Minsu. Clients can pay to change their name. But it's how we can identify you without exposing your identity.â Seo-Jun elaborated, âWeâve had issues in the past of clients who get too attached to their dolls and tried to approach someoneâs family to ask permission to marry their song. Which, of course, we dealt with before disaster struck.â
Minsu⌠Youâre new name. Nothing was yours anymore. Your body, time, and now name wasnât even yours.
âLetâs practice.â Seo-Jun cleared his throat. âMinsu, how are you?â
You hesitated for a moment before speaking. âIâm fine⌠Mr. Seo-Jun.â
âGood job. You even remembered Mr.â He smiled. Seo-Jun put your backpack in your room. It was a simple room, with a bed, desk, and wardrobe. It was bare. âYou can decorate it with what you want, it's all yours. But if your client gives you a gift, Iâd recommend making a space for it. They notice this kind of stuff.â
You looked around the room. The floor was hardwood, cold, and slightly creaky. You werenât given much time to settle before Seo-Jun took you to the next floor. âThis is the dressing room. We dress the dolls here in outfits when they have to attend events. We also have makeup available, if you donât know how to use it we can teach you. You are expected to wear makeup, shave, and keep your body healthy while in our care.â There were two older women there. It was the first time youâd seen women in the dollhouse so far.
âThis is Jill and Mary. Theyâre the main doll caretakers and your beauticians. They make you beautiful on the inside and out for our clients. They also help with cooking and cleaning, so please treat them kindly.â
You nodded to them shyly.
Mary cracked a smile. Her caramel brown skin had glitter around her eyes, and her smile was so white even the crayon wouldnât be able to keep up. Her clothes were simple but chic like she was about to walk a runway. Jill was white, her most notable feature was her colorful hair. Her tattoos, where they could be seen, were amazingly detailed. She had a snake slithering up her throat, ready to bite her chin.
Seo-Jun cleared his throat. âIntroduce yourself.â
âO-Oh! Iâm y/n.â
Seo-Jun chuckled. âNot that name, remember?â
âI have to use my fake name with other workers too?â
Seo-Jun frowned. âItâs not fake. Itâs your name. Itâs just a second one to the one youâre born with. And yes, anonymity is our friend here. So use the name that you were given, please.â
You turned to the women, who were smiling expectantly. âHi⌠Iâm Minsu. I guess.â
Mary spoke first, âYouâll get used to it. Itâs a transitory period right now so just take it slow.â Jill nodded in agreement. âNow, youâre here for fitting, right?â You could tell Mary had a slight English accent, but she was suppressing it.
âIâll leave it to you. Minsuâs a very good boy, he wonât cause any trouble,â Seo-Jun said as he left you with the two women. Mary and Jill were thorough, each taking a side of your body and measuring you. The length of your arms, legs, waist size, and even your bust.Â
âSo, this will be your first mixer, no?â Mary asked.
You nodded.
âAre we looking for something more cute or sexy with the concept here, Mary?â Jill asked.
âLetâs ask him.âÂ
Mary looked at you, waiting for you to answer. âUm⌠I guess cute?â
Jill booed at you. âYouâve got a sexy frame already. We can crop a top, get you loose-fitting shorts, and give you something cozy yet sexy.â
âJill, letâs respect him here. Minsu doesnât want that. Plus, heâd look way better in leather and sheer. I already know what youâre thinking. That just wonât work.â
Jill and Mary started holding up pieces over you, arguing about what to give you. Slowly they moved away from the cute vibe youâd asked for⌠By the end, you had a sheer shirt, black leather pants, with a leather belt around your waist, not your pants, and a gray denim jacket. You were given some silver accessories, rings, and necklaces to try on.Â
Youâd never worn anything so⌠revealing. Without your jacket or the design on the front of the shirt, youâd be shirtless. The black sheet was see-through; you could see your stomach in the mirror, and your belt only pulled attention to it. The belt was odd. It was above your pants, so make your waist smaller, so the loops used for belts were altered to move up for the belt to slide through and keep your pants up.
âMinsu, you look great!â Jill exclaimed.Â
Mary nodded in agreement. âJill was right, your body suits a sexier concept anyway. Just keep the jacket on if youâre feeling modest. But if you want to get attention, take it off halfway through the party. Pretend it's warm or something!â
The pair squealed like young girls, rambling about ways to appeal to potential clients. But you were just tired and hungry. âSo, when can I eat?â
âOh, you havenât eaten?â Jill frowned.
âWeâll get you something light. We donât want to bloat you too much, since you have the belt on. Thereâs food at the mixer but remember not to stuff your face.â Mary said as she stepped away.
âWhy not?â
âWell, what if a client wants to take you home? Youâll want your body to look its best if you have to perform.â Jill squealed. You hadnât thought of that. What if someone does show an interest in you? And they want something physical from you⌠Would you be able to go through with it?
Mary returned with a sliced apple. âThis should hold you over for now. The mixer will be soon. We still have to do your hair and makeup. So sit, Itâs alright if you doze off, weâll take good care of you.â You listened, sitting in a studio chair as they started working, one on your hair and the other on your makeup. Like magic, you passed out almost immediately in the chair. When you opened your eyes, theyâd just finished their last touches.
âWelcome back, Sleeping Beauty. You look amazing!â You looked into the mirror in front of you. Your eyebrows had been brushed. Your shawling and nose had never been more prominent. And your hair had a shine that you could only really get from a hair salon.
âThank you⌠This is great.â You mumbled as you looked over yourself.
The pair smiled triumphantly. âIt's all a part of the job! So go knock them out! Seo-Jun will be here any minute to take you to the mixer.âÂ
They started cleaning as you left the room, going back to your room. There was a mirror on your desk. You used it to study yourself more. Their work was impeccable, with model-quality makeup in such a short time. The alone time youâd found was spoiled quickly with a knock at the door. You answered it to see Seo-Jun waiting.
âLetâs go. Leave your backpack, you can get it later.â
You put the mirror back on your desk and followed Seo-Jun out the door. The venue for the mixer was toward the downtown area in a hotel, one of the large classy ballrooms. There were waitstaff walking with finger food. Many young men, all fashionably dressed, stood around talking to each other. It was intimidating seeing some of them. They could easily be actors and models on the front of magazines⌠Then there was you, the college kid who wasnât in the same league as them.
Seo-Jun led you to an empty table. âOkay, youâll sit here. If anyone comes to you, talk to them respectfully but in a friendly manner. Youâre the only doll from our house, all these other ones wonât know you. Remember, Minsu, nothing about your personal life. Or theirs. Keep everything hidden, and tell only what you need to.â
You nodded nervously. âWhat are you going to do?â
âIâm going to try and point you out to a few people.â Seo-Jun turned to leave, but you grabbed his arm. He was all youâd known for the last week. And now he was leaving you alone at a table at this huge party. âIf you want to be a baby, do that to clients. But with me donât be a baby, Iâll be watching the whole time. Nothing will happen to you.â He pulled his hand away and walked off, talking to a few men in suits.
The mixer began shortly after. Men started slowly filling the room, all dressed in formal clothes, from suits or high-end outfits. Not one paid you any mind. You were relieved that no one was interested in you. You occasionally looked around the room, searching for Seo-Jun with little luck. The first hour was a panic fest, silently hoping no one would sit at your table and talk to you. In the second hour, some clients found who they liked talking to and stuck to certain areas. Some dolls had almost seven men around them at any time. In the third hour, some dolls left with their partners.Â
Thankfully, not one person seemed interested in you. Youâd been sitting so long that your legs started to fall asleep. Youâd tried your best to eat any time the servers walked past you with a plate, but the buffet at the other end of the room was almost calling you. Cautiously, looking over your shoulders, you stood and made your way over. Walking like you knew what to do, or like you belonged. The table was full of interesting foods youâd never tried. Mostly seafood and assorted fruits. You took a plate and started stacking it with whatever seemed the yummiest, which was one of everything!
It wasnât until you reached the end that you realized how much youâd grabbed. It wouldnât all fit on your plate. If you tried walking back to your seat, youâd drop something⌠You turned, slowly toward your table when you bumped into someone, keeping the damage under control. You donât drop your food!Â
The person in front of you let out a heavy sigh. You looked forward, a huge spot on their shirt from where youâd bumped into them.
âHoly shit, Iâm so sorry!â You exclaimed.
He shook his head. âItâs alright, you didnât mean to.â
You put your plate down on a nearby table. You slid the sleeve of your jacket down, making it slide off your shoulder, as you rubbed the spot. It didnât look like it was going to clean neatly. âIâm really sorry. I can take it and get it washed?â You suggested as you looked at the manâs face.
You realized he was extremely familiarâlike celebrity familiar. He had a middle part with long dark hair that draped his eyes. His jawline was sharp, and his eyebrows knitted together in frustration.Â
âDo I know you?â You asked.
âUh, no. We donât know each other.â The man assured.
The spot wasnât getting any better and some people were starting to stare. âHow about you take my jacket for now?â You slid off your jacket, showing off your top completely to the room.
âOh, IâThatâs not necessary.â The man said, looking away from you. âJust put your jacket back on.â
âI insist! I ruined your shirt!â More people started staring, and whispering.Â
âFine! Iâll take it, just give it!â He snatched the jacket from you, pulling it over himself as he looked down. His long hair covered his face as he looked around.Â
âDo you have a table? You can sit with me, and we can talk about getting your shirt cleaned.â
The man nodded again. âFine, just take me away from here.â
You took him to your table in the corner of the room, where youâd spent the last three hours alone. Many more people were watching you this time than when youâd left. Maybe Jill was right about your shirt⌠It made you a little self-conscious with so much staring. You pulled out a chair for the man and sat next to him.
âIâm y-Minsu! Itâs nice to meet you.â You put your hand out.
âAre things always like this?âÂ
You shrugged. âThis is my first time here, so I donât really know.â
The man looked around the room, acknowledging the looks. âWell⌠Thatâs nice.â
You sat awkwardly as you looked at him. You noticed Seo-Jun behind him, toward the other end of the room, motioning something to you. Talk to him?
âSo, Mister? What brings you here?â You asked,
âYou donât need to call me that. My nameâs Jay. I⌠came here for something stupid and I donât think I shouldâve come.â
You smiled at him. âYou sound like someone made you come here. I didnât want to be here either. I was so worried that someone would talk to me, but it turns out that no one would even pay attention to me.â
âWhyâs that?â
âI just⌠donât think this is my sort of party. And Iâm not very good at meeting new people. Iâm only here because I have to.â
Jay nodded. âI get that. I really only came because my members teased me about not meeting any new people.â
âMembers?â
Jayâs eyes flickered to you. âY-Yeah. Iâm a part of a group. Iâm a performer.â
âWhoa! Do you make music? Iâd love to listen to it.â
Jay smirked. âItâs not me who makes the music. But I dabble.â
âI donât have my phone. Tell me your band, and Iâll try to remember it.â
Jay leaned close to you to whisper, âIâm a member of Enhypen.â
You blinked. The words echoed in your brain before you looked at the man again. Thatâs where youâd seen him! He was Jay from Enhypen, and he was talking to you. âO-Oh, yeah Iâve heard of that group before.â
âOh? Are you a fan?â Jay smiled. âItâs always nice to meet a fan.â
âIâm not trying to be weird. I am a fan, but if you wanna forget about it or talk to someone elseââ
âNo. Youâre funny. And I think it would be better to spend time with a fan.â Jay slipped your jacket off and placed it over your shoulders. âI think this suits you better than me, by the way.â Your heart was fluttering a mile a minute. Jay said he wanted to spend time with you and even draped a jacket over your shoulders. Eun would be foaming at the mouth at this point.
âCould I ask why youâre at an all-guy mixer?â
âYou can, but then Iâd ask you the same question.â
âToucheâŚâ You chuckled awkwardly. âWell, Iâm here for another hour. So we can chat⌠or whatever.â
Jay smirked. âWould you wanna talk somewhere else?â
You nodded. âIâm cool with that. It beats talking here, with all the staring.â
âThen letâs roll,â Jay said as he stood. You followed him as he led you out of the room. You spotted Seo-Jun who gave you a thumbs-up as you passed by. Jay took you to a room in the hotel. It had an amazing view since it was on a higher floor.
âJay, check this out! Itâs so high!â You cheered.
âSo, uh. Iâm kind of awkward at this since Iâve never done it. I donât have any preferences or anything. Iâd be okay to start and see how it goes.â Jay said.
You turned around to see Jay sitting on the bed in the room. âWhat?â
âIsnât this the part where we⌠do stuff?â Jay raised an eyebrow.
Your face went warm. You hadnât thought about the context of things until now. Jay was at a party to meet a partner to spend the night with⌠and heâd chosen you. And like an idiot you accepted thinking he just wanted to talk.
âI-IâŚâ
âIs it more of a, I tell you what to do?â Jay stood, walking toward you. âIâm new to this whole thing, so Iâd appreciate it if you could help me.â
You couldnât form the words you wanted. All of the thoughts in your mind couldnât fit the situation in front of you. âI-Iâm new too,â was all that you could muster.
âWell, that works for the both of us then. We can figure it out togetherâŚâ Jay approached you until the both of you were at the window. Your back against it, he leaned his arm on the glass near your head. âLetâs just go slow.âÂ
Jayâs tone was calm and empathetic as if he were as worried as you were. He slid his free hand behind your neck and kissed you softly. Your eyes fluttered shut as you placed your hands against his chest, letting him move as he pleased. It was a peck at first. Just a touch, a test. Then Jay leaned in again for a kiss, your lips meeting for longer. His nose brushed yours as he started to move his lips experimentally to find what he likedâŚ
#oracle of dreams#kpop x male reader#kpop x male reader smut#kpop male reader#x male reader#x reader#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen#jay enhypen#jay enha#enhypen x male reader#enhypen x reader#enhypen x y/n#enhypen jay x reader#enhypen jay x male reader#kpop male idol#kpop bg#kpop fanfic#kpop#park jongseong#enhypen jongseong
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Hii i think your requests are open
Can I request a Logan Sargeant fic (cus he needs more like fr đ)
An angst fluff where the reader is Alex's sister that just graduated with a engineering (related to cars for f1) and since the reader just graduated she's been following Alex for all the GPs and she sees how williams doesnt really focus much on Logan and she realised they didnt look at something crucial so she just took over one day and it made him get a points and they end up together?? Idk if that makes sense but i hope it does
Thank youu đŤś
I had this in my inbox for ages and didn't know how to write it; then I decide I'll write it, Williams kicks Logan out. So, now finally, I've recovered, here's the fic.
I made a few changes to the request if you don't mindđŤŁ
Engineering Love
Alex Albon, driver for Williams Racing had a younger sister; everyone knew about. She was attached to Alex like his shadow. She was a golden retriever in human form. She would always make it to all of his races and was his biggest supporter except when she was away at college getting her bachelors and then masters in Automobile engineering.
In the fast paced world of Formula One, finding a job opening in a position you wanted and with the pay that you liked was a little difficult unless you had connections. Y/N had the connections, she was sure her brother would help her land a nice starting gig in Formula One but she was adamant on doing everything herself. She was fierce and strong and fought people when she was only 21 and Alex had lost his seat at Red Bull. So, Alex knew better than to mess with her.
Y/N was the same age as Alex's team mate, Logan Sargeant who had made his Formula One debut this season. Alex saw Logan as his younger brother the same way he would treat his sister. His sister had taken a liking to Logan and he could see that. He saw how annoyed she got when some one was rude to Logan or people talked badly about him after a crash or particularly bad race. She was currently Logan's defender more than Alex's. He didn't mind it since Logan was a nice guy and would probably bend over backwards for his sister.
After a particularly bad race and every one was bashing Logan, she had a fight with James Vowels on why he wouldn't defend his driver and why did he have to bare the brunt of Williams short comings. She wasn't willing to listen to anyone until she felt a hand on her shoulder, "Y/N, it's ok. Stuff happens" Logan said. "No" she replied and turned back to Vowels but before she could say anything, Logan sweeped her off her feet and carried her away. Y/N's heart was beating really fast while Logan carried her bridal style away from the chaos she had created. She looked at Logan and studied his features for the hundredth time since she had met him. There was a slight stubble on his face, his blond hair shined under the building's yellow light, blue eyes looked like a deep ocean she didn't mind drowning in. Logan looked down but she quickly looked away, "Can you put me down now?" she whispered. Logan put her on her feet. "Why'd you stop me?" she asked while fixing her clothes. "Can you stop it?" Logan said slightly annoyed. "What" she asked. "Stop interfering in my business. I'll handle it" he said sternly. "I just wanted to help plus they weren't being very nice" she said while biting her lower lip. "Y/N, this is my team. I'll deal with it. Stop trying to be some saviour" he said now running a hand through his hair. "I just wanted to help" she mumbled, her voice barely above a whisper. "Well, you didn't do anything but make stuff more difficult for me" he snapped and walked away.
Y/N headed back to her hotel room, where she couldn't stop crying until she heard a knock on the door. "Y/N, I got us pho" Alex said in a sing-songy tone. "I don't want it" she hiccuped out a reply. "I'm not leaving until you open the door or I'm calling mum" he said sternly. She shuffled towards the door and let Alex in. He placed the food on the table and sat with his sister on the bed; "What's up?" he asked. She just shook her head as tears started to fall. "hey, hey" Alex cooed while wiping away her tears and giving her a hug. "The Y/N I know made others cry. It feels weird to see you cry" he stated patting her back. She hit Alex's back while he continued to hug her. "Logan got angry, I mean annoyed at me for taking his side and fighting James." she cried. "Don't take what he says to heart, he's just stressed." Alex reasoned. "I know but I've never felt this way about anyone and when he got annoyed with me, it hurt" she mumbled. "Does little old Y/N have a crush?" Alex teased. "Yeah" she said now pulling away to look at her brother. "I think I love him Alex and that's what's freaking me out" she finally admitted. Alex just smiled at her.
He had had a similar conversation with his team mate a few days back, albeit with a few less tears. "Your heart eyes are so obvious" Alex chuckled while he saw his teammate stare at his sister. "What? No" he stammered. "It's ok. I know my sister's sweetheart. But I still don't get what you see in that devil reincarnated." he said while a shudder ran down his spine. "No, no.....I....was I that obvious?" Logan asked. "Kind of, I think even Gunther knows that you like her at this point" Alex stated solemnly. "What?" Logan asked shocked. "Mate you need more words in your vocabulary if you want to woo that woman, she loves all these fictional men, who talk eloquently" Alex laughed. "Really" Logan asked. "Dear God, the both of you are hopeless" Alex said as he walked away.
It was during the United States GP, Y/N was watching Logan race; he was doing so well, 3 of the 20 drivers had retired, if he over took a few more drivers he would finish in points. Logan was starting to lose focus and got flustered; Y/N saw that. She took the microphone in her hand started talking to Logan just to keep him going. Even though he finished in P12 after the stewards disqualified Lewis and Charles; Logan was the first American in 30 years to finish in points. He was over the moon; he wanted to see Y/N, the only person he wanted to see right now.
After everything, Y/N was sat in the Williams hospitality. Logan almost ran towards her and gave her a hug. "I'm sorry for the other day and thank you for calming me down" he whispered into her ear. "It's ok, Congratulations Logan" she said. "No it's not ok, I should not be able to treat you so poorly, no one should" he stated. "You were annoyed, you didn't mean it" she reasoned. "I was annoyed that the woman I loved only saw me in all my downs and that I couldn't share my ups with her. Now that I've scored my first point in F1, I wanna keep going up and share all my ups with you." he rambled. Y/N's eyes were wide, "You like me?" she asked. "Uhh" Logan's mouth was open. "I like you too" she smiled widely. Logan breathed a sigh of relief. "Can I kiss you?" he asked. She nodded. Logan leaned in as his nose brushed against her cheek, he pressed his lips on her while she wrapped her arms around her neck; "I'm gonna make you a race winner one day" she mumbled in between the kiss. "Can't wait to win races with you as my engineer" he laughed now kissing her again
#ask request#gguk-n#formula one imagine#formula one fluff#formula one x you#formula one x reader#formula one fanfiction#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 fic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 angst#formula one angst#formula 1 x y/n#formula 1 x you#formula one x y/n#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 imagine#f1 angst#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#logan sargent fluff#logan sargeant#logan sargent x reader#logan sargeant imagine#logan sargeant x reader
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The Past That Haunts | Din Djarin
Din Djarin x fem!reader ⧠oneshot
Summary: It's been months since you stowed away on the Mandalorian's ship, running from the ghosts of a past you'd rather forget. You shouldn't have fallen in love, you knew better than to get close, and now you have to pay the penance for your sins. Your past has come back to haunt, and you're his next bounty.
A/N: Really really proud of this one. Should have been studying, but was doing this lol so you all better enjoy. As always, requests are open and I'll get to them when I can because college is insane. Love you all dearly, hope you have a great day wherever you are đ¤
Warnings: violence, sexual themes and suggestive content, mentions of blood, fem!reader, angst, fluff, happy ending I promise (i only like hurting you a little bit, not enough to take away the happy ending)
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No one can run from their past forever.
Lies, secrets, sinsâthey all have a nasty habit of breaking through the thin soil they've been buried beneath and rearing their heads. What was left behind never stays gone, but rather skitters behind in waiting for the right moment to revive. The past haunts, it stays connected to the essence of a soul and refuses death itself until its dues have been paid.
No one can run from their past forever, not even after you'd almost forgotten it was lurking right there.
And yet, the reason you'd nearly forgotten was laying unconscious in the midst of a hunt he'd dragged you along on.
"Mando, if you're done dreaming of me I could use some backup!" You shout, barely avoiding the clawed fist of the Trandoshan mercenary before you. The bounty was stronger and deadlier than you, but you were faster.
As you danced and weaved around his blows, your eyes slipped to your Mandalorian still unconscious from where the Trandoshan had snuck up on the two of you. This job was supposed to be simple, but even lower grade mercenaries like the one fighting you were still deadly.
With a breath of frustration slipping your lips, your mind quickly raced to try and work out how to get out of this situation. Mando clearly would be no help and while he often punched his way out of problems, you didn't have that luxury. That's why within seconds you whirled around to the mercenary with a nervous smile on your lips.
"My friend, I believe we got off on the wrong foot." Your smile was charismatic as you extended your arms out in welcome to the target. The mercenary snarled at the comment, and you both glanced down to the foot he'd just regrown after Din had managed to chop it off.
You look back up at the reptilian male, a sheepish smile on your lips, "Bad choice of words"
He hissed at you and lunged again, slashing a knife you hadn't even seen him pull. A yelp left your mouth as you dodged the hit, desperately trying to be diplomatic.
"Look, the Mandalorian is out cold," You placated, ducking out of a knife swing by a hair's breadth, "He's the bounty hunter, not me. You and I, we can work something out."
This caught his attention, his yellow-orange eyes tracking your every breath, "You're not a hunter, but you're with the Mandalorian. You wouldn't betray him."
"He doesn't have to know," You reason, shoving every ounce of honey-coated deception you have into your tone, "Look at him! One hit from you and he's out like a light, big guy. There's no way he'll even remember this happened."
The Trandoshan's knife was lowering now, and your heart skipped a beat with hope. This was going to work, and when it did you were going to give Mando hell. You nearly smiled at the thought, but remembered where you were.
"What are your terms?" He hissed, and you take a calculated step towards him.
"I let you go free, and you let me leave with my life." You were getting nearer to the bounty, and he seemed to be so caught up in pondering your bargain that he missed your hand slip to the beskar knife Din had made for you a few months back.
"That seems acceptable," The bounty finally admits, slipping his knife back into its place and surveying you, "I'll-"
With a war cry, you launch yourself at the Trandoshan and jump onto his back, one arm around his neck and the other trying to plunge the beskar knife into his thick, scaled skin. He roars in response, spinning wildly and clawing up at you.
"Just die!" You pant, slashing and seeming to miss every swing.
Din was right, you really did suck at this whole combat thing. It's a good thing you were one hell of a thief.
"Y/N!"
It took more effort than you'd like to admit to keep the relief you felt from crashing over your entire form. Your eyes flicked up mid-spin from your perch on the Trandoshan's back to see the Mandalorian stumbling to his feet.
"Morning, sleepy head! Wanna join the fun?" You breathlessly call out, a tired smile on your lips.
The target takes advantage of your split attention and slices his razor-sharp claws through the tender flesh of your forearm. You clench your teeth to grit through the pain, "Not cool!"
It was mere seconds after the minor blow had been landed that the wild spinning and thrashing of the bounty finally stopped. Your dizzy mind righted to see a gloved hand grab the reptilian male and rip him to a stop.
You slide off his back, groaning to find your balance severely off-kilter. You fall on your ass just as Mando fires a shot at him, slicing it through the target's shoulder and making him roar in pain. His cry is cut off when Mando fires another blast into his skull, making the silence following the thud of the body deafening.
"Cold it is," Mando grunts, holstering the blaster.
The beskar helmet he wears immediately snaps to you, and you've been around him long enough to tell by his body language what he's feeling. Anger, worry, guilt.
Against your better judgement, your heart stutters as Din crouches down in front of you and reaches out for your bleeding arm. The lightning that crackles under your skin as his gloved hands tenderly lift your forearm makes your already dizzy mind spin. It takes the strength you've built up over the last few months to ignore the effect he has on you.
"You waited for a grand entrance, can't say I'm mad," You quip. His shoulders are tight as he keeps his gaze down on your arm.
"I should've seen him coming," Is all he replies, his voice that same sugar-sweet gravel that makes your inhibitions crumble.
"You know, I had it under control until I accidentally made a joke about the foot you chopped off." You laugh, the sound light in comparison to the biting pain, and Din shakes his head.
"That's not funny." He tried to sound convincing, but you could tell he was loosening up now that he'd seen your injury was just a scratch.
"It's a little funny," You fire back, a smile growing on your lips. He looks up at you and that damn mask makes your heart race and your mind wander.
It's the almost imperceptible breathy laugh he lets out, though, that makes you remember how far gone you are when it comes to him.
"I like it when you laugh." Your words are soft, and they're out before you can even think to stop them. Mando goes still before you, your arm still in his grasp. It's then that the position you're in, with him crouched before you, seems much more intimate than it did a few minutes ago.
You go still as one of his hands lifts to your face, and you nearly forget how to breath when he almost absentmindedly brushes a gloved-knuckle against a light bruise forming on your cheek from the fight. His fingers leave fire where they touch, and you can only dream about how it would feel if it were his skin and not his gloves.
He catches himself too quickly for your liking and stands, extending a hand down to you, "Come on, we've got a bounty to cash in."
You take his hand and let him help you to your feet, "I think I deserve a larger cut on this one. I did take him on one-on-one, you know."
"And nearly got yourself killed."
You glance up at him, your brows lifted in a challenge, "I saved your ass, didn't I?"
Din doesn't move back an inch, but rather stays towering over you and cocks his head in response, "Is that so?"
Your heart stumbles yet again. The air is thick with tension and unspoken attraction, and the way he's looking down at you isn't helping. Din is usually as close to void of emotion as he can be, save for his temper and inability to keep from sassing you. It's moments like this though, moments where he's almost playful, that make you remember just how powerful the hold he has on you is.
"Can't deny it this time, Mandalorian." You try to sound cool and calm like he always does, but fail miserably. He just hums before stepping back and breaking the tension-corded air between you.
"Help me get him to the Crest."
And you do, but as you work in the comfortable silence you've grown used to, you can't help but think about how lucky you are. This life, it may seem dangerous and hectic, but it's a blessing to you. It's everything to you. He's everything to you, he has been since the first few moments he found you. There was a sudden tightness in your chest, and you can't help but think of that dayâthe day your life would never be the same.
||| Months Prior
Your breaths were labored, your legs burned, your vision was blurred with sweat and tears.
You had nowhere to go, nothing in the bustling port town on Corrida could shield you from your fate. Panic clawed up your throat, so thick it nearly choked you.
Not like this, you pleaded to yourself, it can't end like this.
Mind-racing and heart-pounding, you swiftly and nimbly darted in and out of shops and between buildings. You danced in the shadows, became one of them. It was your greatest strength, your stealth, and even though it was what had gotten you into this mess, it was now your only chance at survival.
The day was turning into night, and as light dwindled your hope flared and grew. Once darkness settled over the town shrouded by mountains, your pursuers would lose every chance of finding you. All you had to do was find a way onto a ship and ride it out of this forsaken planet. Then, you'd be-
"Hey, you!"
The voice that rang out sent tendrils of fear to your very bones. You knew that voice. You'd know that voice for as long as you'd live. While there were still thoughts in your brain, that voice would haunt you. You ducked around the alleyway between two shops, your heart racing at a painful speed as you chanced a look in the direction of your old Master.
"You seen a girl running through here?" He snarled, his tone boiling with anger that he thinly kept composed under his Imperial getup. The Empire was gone, but unfortunately the New Republic could not monitor every planet in every system when it fell. You just had the supreme misfortune of dwelling in the town of a group of Imperial officers that refused to back down.
"There's plenty of girls here, be more specific," The shopkeeper he'd asked grunted, going about his work.
Your Master spoke to him for a few more minutes before you forced yourself to slink away, melting into the shadows growing longer as the sky grew darker. As you snuck around the back of the buildings, you heard your Master's voice rise in volume.
"Anyone who finds an indentured woman in a green cloak is to bring her to me, immediately."
You froze, looking down at the cloak around your shoulders. With a pounding heart you shucked it off, cursing the Imperial scum for the clever tactic. Now if he saw you sneaking around, you'd have nothing to hide your face.
Indentured. You bristled at the word, anger flooding your mind. What a pretty way to say enslaved.
You had to get out of here and fast. The Empire might be gone, but this town was still pinned under their thumb. These people wouldn't think twice before turning you over. The satchel that was slung across your body was heavy with the reason why you couldn't let that happen.
With silent steps, you made it all the way to the ship port. There weren't many options present, and the choice would be paramount. Pick the wrong ship, and you'd be cast into the streets for your old Master and his troopers to find you and the item you stole from him that was nestled in the bag you bore.
As you surveyed the ship port, you noted three choices. First, the light freighter that sat loading its cargo near the middle of the portâtoo busy, too central. Second, the old Razor Crest sitting nearest youâlow profile, but you could've sworn you'd just seen a Mandalorian walk into it. That was too risky, too dangerous. Third, and most appealing, the CR90 Corvetteâno one dangerous was entering, enough cargo to hide in, it was perfect.
Making your mind, you begin to dart across the ship port, dodging past the Razor Crest and towards the Corvette. It would work, it would be perf-
You skidded to a stop so fast that you nearly tripped and fell. Walking up to the Corvette was your Master, and he'd just begun talking to the owner. Your eyes widened as he motioned to the three storm troopers with him, and they began to search the ship.
This wasn't good, you weren't going to make if off of this planet.
Your eyes wildly searched the port and landed on the Razor Crest just as its back hatch began to close. It wasn't ideal, but it was taking off soon, and that made it your only choice. Holding your breath, you surged towards the beat up ship and vaulted into the space between the closing hatch and the ship's interior. Luckily for you, the Mandalorian you'd seen was in the cockpit taking off when you clanged and rolled into the ship's belly. The engines started and the ship lifted, and before you could comprehend it, you were leaving Corrida.
You escaped. You stole from the Imperial guard Finon Kane, the man who'd enslaved and tortured you and hundreds of others, and escaped. You were free.
A laugh of pure and raw joy bubbled out of your chest as you clutched your satchel close to your chest. You'd done it, you'd actually done it. The other slaves had cheered you on as you made your grand escape, had laughed and whooped with you as you bested Master Kane. And now, you were free.
You barely felt the ship slip out of the atmosphere of the planet as you shoved to your feet. Now was the tricky partâyou had to hide from the Mandalorian until he docked somewhere else, and then you could-
A strong, gloved hand closed around your shoulder and whirled you around with such strength and speed that you could only yelp as you were pressed into the cool metal of the Crest's walls. One massive arm barred your throat, and the other held a blaster to your head. The Mando's grip was strong and he oozed confidence, but he was silent.
Silent as death, silent as the reaper in beskar armor.
His shining helmet tilted at you, and your heart dropped to your feet. He hadn't killed you yet, he just kept looking at you, inspecting you, almost testing to see if you were a threat or not. So, he wasn't a cold-blooded killer then. There was a heart, whether it was flesh or beskar, somewhere underneath his armor. You needed to exploit it, and fast.
A shaking smile made it onto your lips and you tried your best to seem as calm as he was, "A Mandalorian, and one with fine armor too. What a pleasant surprise."
"What are you doing on my ship?" Was all he gritted out, his tone rough and smooth all at once. A walking and living dichotomy that, against your better judgement, made your heart trip over itself.
"Is this your ship?" You noted, humming to yourself as your pulse thrummed, "I must have boarded without even looking, it seems so much like mine that I-"
The blaster moved closer to your skin and your words died, your eyes widening as the Mandalorian stared you down through his mask, "The truth, stowaway."
It wasn't a question, but a demand. Flattery clearly wasn't getting you anywhere, so you needed to find a different way.
"I need safe passage," You honestly announced, your charming, hopeful smile still on your lips to persuade him you're not a threat, "And clearly, Mando, you need some help around here. I could be of service to you, I've got a great many skills!"
"Can you hunt?"
He didn't mean animals. That was when you realized this Mandalorian was a bounty hunter, and you cursed every star for crossing your fate into bad luck.
"No, but I-"
"Can you fight?" He interrupted, his voice a calm and collected drill.
"Well, not particularly, but if you'd just-"
"Can you fix the ship?"
You were getting frustrated now.
"Never really been good with mechanics, but-"
"Then you are of no use to me." He decided, letting go of you and holstering his blaster. He stepped back and shuffled through one wall of his ship, looking for something, "I'll dock at the next inhabited planet and turn you over to-"
It was his turn to be cut off, but not by you. Instead, the whooshing of a cabin door opening followed by a child's giggle makes his words die out. Surprise skittered through you at the site. A child. This large, rough Mandalorian Bounty Hunter was taking care of a...a child?
As he stormed over to the little thing, he muttered soft chiding to it before picking it up gently in the hands that just held your life. The child nestled into the crook of his arm, batting its massive eyes up at him lovingly.
And, against every warning and better judgement, your heart, your very soul, melted at the site.
"You're a bounty hunter with a kid?" You asked boldly, stepping forward towards the beskar-coated hunter that turned sharply around to you, the kid still in his strong arms, "And what do you do with it when you're on jobs?"
"He stays here or comes with me," he rasps out simply. You let out a short, unbelieving laugh.
"And you say you don't need my help," You chide, being bolder than you should be and stepping up to the pair. The Mandalorian freezes as you brazenly pluck the child out of his arms, cradling the little one into your torso.
The pure shock of what you've just done makes Mando stand awkwardly, unmoving and sputtering for a moment as he tries to respond. Whatever he's saying keeps dying on his tongue as he watches the child giggle and play with your hair, nuzzling into you the way he was just doing to him.
"I can take care of him while you're on hunts," You reason, looking up at the Mando with a bright, unwavering smile, "And, as I was going to say before you rudely interrupted,"
This shocked the bounty hunter even more. The audacity of this woman, who could neither kill nor fight, to be so bold with him? It struck him into an astonished silence.
"I may not have any of the skills you listed," You continued, looking up at the Mandalorian with his child in your arms, "But I'm amazing at sneaking into places. I'm not a killer, but I'm sure a bounty hunter like yourself could use a good thief."
He crosses his arms at this, cocking his head at you in a way that makes you imagine his face with risen brows and a taunting gaze, "Obviously the sneaking part isn't your strong suit."
"Hey, I got in here, didn't I?" You challenged, holding his gaze before looking down at cooing at the child, "Besides, your little one likes me, don't you sweetheart?"
"Could you give him back, please?"
"What was that?" You hummed, tilting your ear towards the child before smiling at it once more, "I couldn't agree more. Your father does need to lighten up."
The Mandalorian sputtered at her words, not understanding how a little thing like you could have rendered him completely speechless and without knowledge of what to do next. No hunt he's ever been on has ever done that to this extent, and yet here you were. A stowaway that, as much as Din wanted to ignore, needed help. You tried to hide it behind your smiles and remarks, but he could see the desperation in your eyes, the worry in your soul.
You needed help, and damn it all he was going to give it to you.
Din cursed himself beneath his breath, shaking his head at you. If the Guild members knew what a softie he was under this armor he'd lose his entire reputation. He could slaughter targets without faltering, but throw in a child and a smartass stowaway and his spine leaves him.
"I'm not his father," The Mandalorian rebuts, but you can hear the lie in his tone, "I'm just looking out for him"
You scoffed at that, "Leaving him alone, taking him on dangerous hunts? Not things a good father would do."
"Hey I'm a great father!" His temper snapped, and you smiled smugly. You glanced up at him, tilting your head the way he'd just done to you.
"So you are his father?" You challenged.
The Mandalorian started and stopped three different sentences before he let out a defeated grunt and walked towards a far wall of the Crest. He slammed his hand onto a button and the door whizzed open to reveal a spare bedroom with three cots. A hope-filled, bright smile lit up your lips.
He was going to let you stay.
"You can sleep here. You'll earn your keep how you promised, but what I say goes, is that clear?" He ordered, staring you down. Your smile widened, and you noted to your memory the soft side the Mandalorian had that you'd bet only a few people had seen.
"I can't thank you enough, Mando," You responded, and he could see that you meant it. You handed him the child and moved to set your satchel, all that was left of your life, in the room he'd opened.
"Don't mention it." His voice of gravel ordered, and you heard him walking away. You couldn't ignore the sense of safety that he radiated, especially because you hadn't felt safe like this in years.
Thinking he was gone, your smile dropped as you sank onto the cot and rested your head against the cool metal.
"I'm free," You whispered, almost to ensure it was real. A genuine, small smile worked its way onto your lips and into your soul, "I'm free."
The Mandalorian watched from the other side of the ship, and he couldn't help the way his heart tugged. He didn't understand why, but Din knew he cared more than he should have to make sure you stayed free, to make sure you'd smile like that again.
|||
You'd only meant to stay for a little while until you had enough credits and resources to make it on your own. And yet, here you were. It had been months and you still hadn't found a way to leave Din and the child.
He had found ways to make you stay. When he got used to your presence, he found that jobs often went easier with your expertise in stealth. The two of you became a team, and with the child it almost felt like...
Your mind stopped at the word that wanted to come next. Family. You hadn't had one in years, and it scared you because you knew you could do this forever. You'd begun to fall in love with Din Djarin the moment he'd picked up the child for the first time, and by now you were properly whipped.
Once the two of you had the bounty secured away, Din turned to you without leaving room for argument, "Sit down."
You did as he instructed, settling down on the cot in your room as Mando grabbed a med kit and walked back over to you. Even as he sat on the cot across from you, his massive frame shadowed your smaller one.
"Give me your arm," He said quietly, his voice sendings shivers racing down your spine that only worsened when he took your skin into his gloved hands.
He inspected it for a moment before humming, "It's not deep, it should heal quickly without bacta."
You were silent as he worked, something out of the ordinary for you and he knew it. As his skilled hands worked quickly, his modulated voice reached out to you, breaking the silence.
"What is it?"
You knew what he meant. Knowing that he could see through every lie you threw at him, you sighed and settled for the truth.
"Today...scared me."
The words surprised your Mandalorian as he went still before you, his hands faltering with the bandage for only a moment before he continued wrapping your cut.
"The hunt did?" He prodded. You shook your head.
"Seeing you lying there..." You began, and shook your head, the image stuck in your brain, "That's going to haunt me for a while, Din."
He tucked the end of the bandage in, and you kept your eyes down on his work. You couldn't stand to meet his masked-gaze, he'd see the emotion working its way through your eyes. One of his gloved hands hooks under your chin and tilts your head up softly to meet his gaze.
"You saved my life today," He said softly, his thumb brushing gently over your skin, "As much as I hate to admit it."
His words had their desired affect and you laughed softly, shaking your head at him as your soul lightened. Din was right, he was alive and well and it had a lot to do with you. The thought calmed you, but you couldn't hide the way it still scared the very depths of you.
"I should be apologizing to you," Mando started, but you cut him off.
"Din-"
"No, shut your mouth and listen to me for once." His voice was sharp, and it made you go silent with surprise. There wasn't cruelty or anger in that tone. Instead, you found it wavering with what you could have sworn was fear.
The Mandalorian moved his hand from your chin to hold more of your jaw, and with the movement you could hardly think straight, "I almost got you killed today. Had I woken up seconds later, you would have been that Trandoshan's target and not the other way around."
The words made your mouth go dry, and you tried to protest them but Din held you jaw with a gentle firmness and shook his head. It wasn't often that he preferred to do the talking, but you could see how bad he needed you to hear him.
"I'm sorry, cyar'ika. I'm so sorry"
You were stunned into silence. You'd never heard him say any of those words before, not sorry and certainly not cyar'ika. You knew what it meant, and it made your head spin. Slowly, so not to startle him, you lift your hands and rest them on the cool beskar of his helmet. He goes still and you can't help but smile softly at him
"There is nothing to forgive, Din."
His hand drops from your jaw and somehow finds its way absently resting on your waist. The touch sends fire shooting through you, and you have to blink a few times to focus.
"Besides, if I could count the number of times I almost got you killed..." You sentence ended naturally as you laughed softly, and he joined in. The sound was honey to your soul and it made you remember that you'd rather be here than anywhere else in the galaxy.
Much to your disappointment, he pulled away and stood surveying you through his mask, "I should go check on the kid. Get some rest."
And then he was gone, and you spent the rest of the night wondering what in the stars you were going to do.
|||
You docked at Tatooine soon after, the ship in dire need of a tune up.
The last few days had been strange. You'd thought the near death encounter would continue to keep the two of you close like it had that day in your room, but he seemed to be ignoring you at any and all costs. He only spoke to you when he needed to and even then it was clipped and short.
By the time you saw Peli, you were dying to slug him over the head with one of her wrenches.
"Well, well, if it isn't my favorite band of three," The mechanic greets, jogging out to meet you with a smile, "Where's my baby?"
Mirroring her smile, you handed the kid over to Peli who eagerly tucked him close, stroking his long ears and cooing to him softly, "I only tolerate you two for him, you know."
The two of you knew better.
"Can you watch over him for a few hours? We have business here." Mando gruffly stated. You furrowed your brows and glanced over at him.
Business? He hadn't mentioned that to you. Then again, he barely mentioned anything to you these last few days.
"Go, go," Peli shooed, already turning around and walking with the kid back to her lodgings, "He and I will make sure the Crest is all fixed up, won't we precious thing? He loves his favorite aunt, doesn't he?"
Aunt, which would make you and Mando his...You brushed away the thought, not letting it bring you hope or joy. You smiled once more at the mechanic before following Mando as he quickly exited the hangar.
"What business do we have?" You asked. He almost seemed like he was not going to reply before he did so without even glancing at you.
"You'll see."
Your patience was waning, but you went along with it nonetheless. You hadn't been walking long on the desert planet before Mando ushered you in a bar nearby. The business ended up being nothing more than a job hunt, leaving you confused as to why the Mandalorian was being so stand-offish. He'd collected a new round of pucks and then left you to spend your evening alone however you pleased. You didn't know where he went and you didn't quite care. He was being an asshole to you, so you could return the favor.
You returned rather quickly to the hangar and the Crest, finding there was nothing better to do. After a few hours of cards and gambling with Peli and her droids, Mando still hadn't returned and you decided to go ahead and tuck the child in for the night. Bidding you friends goodnight, you hoisted the kid into your arms and climbed the hatch to the Crest.
"What's going on with you father, hm?" You asked softly, bouncing him in your arms. He stared up at you with wide, dark eyes, drinking in every word you spoke.
You walked him over to his makeshift bed, sighing as you settled him in it. You spent a moment longer tracing a finger down his wrinkled skin, a saddened look flickering in your gaze.
"He's going to be the end of me," You whispered, and could've sworn the kid's eyes softened on you. You leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to his brow and walked out of his room, "Sweet dreams, little one."
When you shut the door, your eyes traveled to the bandage still tied securely around your wounded arm. Although Mando assured it would be alright, it hurt like hell. You made your way into your room, grabbing a med kit as you went. You set the kit down on your bed and opened it, about to tend to your would when you heard footsteps and then the hatch closing to the Crest.
Your heart leapt into your throat and you stepped away from the med kit and out of your room, your eyes traveling over the ship until you saw the flash of beskar in the dark, "Finally, you were starting to worry me."
"I'm sure I was," came Din's response, but his voice made you freeze.
You watched in shock for a moment as he turned and stumbled slightly as he walked towards where you stood. With wide eyes, you barely could speak, "Are you...drunk?"
The Mandalorian came closer to you, his massive body making you take a few steps back. He kept advancing until your back was pressed against the cool metal of the Crest's wall.
"Din," you whispered, your heart racing as he stopped before you, settling his forearms above your head and caging you in. You could hardly think straight with him like this.
"Close your eyes, cyar'ika." His voice came, low and rough and gentle and slurred.
"Din, what-"
"Close your eyes." He ordered again. With him this close to you, your inhibitions were all but gone and you did as he asked, shutting your eyes. Before you, you could hear him let out a long sigh.
"I was thinking," He started, followed by the moving of his arms away from the wall. You furrowed your brows at the absence of his presence, but before another thought could leave, you heard a sound that made your heart stop and your mind go blank.
You heard him take his helmet off.
"Din, you're drunk-" You couldn't make it past that before he was cutting in. He's never taken his helmet off around you, it was the creed. It was his life. He'd regret this in the morning.
"Shut up." He murmured, his body heat returning close to you. Your eyes stayed firmly shut as he told you too, that way it wouldn't break the code he lived by. You felt his hands touch your neck softly and jumped slightly in surprise at the absence of gloves, "I know what I'm doing. Just keep your eyes closed, mesh'la."
His skin. His skin was touching yours.
Your breathing hitched, and you knew when he settled those bare, rough hands onto your jaw that he did so in a manner to feel the thrum of your pulse in your neck. It was wildly racing, quicker than it ever had.
"I was thinking," He started again, running his thumbs over your skin and forever ruining you from contact with anyone else ever again, "That you almost died."
His low voice had taken on an edge of sadness and you nearly opened your eyes out of habit, but forced them to stay closed.
"You almost died, and I never got to know what those pretty lips of yours tasted like"
What in the stars was happening? Was this real? Were you going to wake up and find it was all a dream in a few moments? Or was this finally putting the last few days into context? Even after your talk, the hunt had messed him up and haunted him just as it had you. And now here he was, his breath fanning across your skin and his lips almost brushing against yours.
You never imagined this would happen, not in thirty lifetimes did you think you'd ever know what it would feel like to press your lips against Din Djarin's.
And yet, in the next second, you knew.
Without warning, he captured your lips with his and pressed his body against yours, keeping you against the wall. He grabbed your hands in one of his, pressing them together over your head to keep you from touching his face. As his lips worked desperately, hungrily, passionately against yours, your knees buckled and his free hand slipped around your waist, keeping you from falling.
This had to be a dream, it had to be. This couldn't be real, but it was. You knew that he was drunk and that he'd probably not remember this in the morning. You tried to pull away, tried to force yourself to stop but he held you fast, crushing your body against his and making you forget your own name with his tongue in your mouth.
You didn't want it to end, but you knew it would have to eventually. It would end and you would have to go back to pretending like you weren't in love with him.
As if you'd brought it about by just thinking it, Din's lips left yours. He wasn't kissing you, but he stayed so close that his nose touched yours.
"I'm sorry," He breathed, his lips brushing against yours.
And then he was gone.
You stood there with your eyes closed long after you heard his bedroom door shut. You cursed every star in the sky, because now that you knew what his skin felt like, every moment without it touching you was pure and unbridled torture. This torture was worse than any you'd felt under Master Finon Kane and his troopers.
When you slept that night, you dreamt of Din's lips on yours.
|||
In the morning, you didn't know whether or not Din was going to continue ignoring you, address what happened last night, or pretend like the last few days haven't even happened. When you greeted him in the belly of the ship and he he greeted you the same as he has for months before heading off to find bounties, you realized it would be the last option.
Anything was better than the blatant ignoring, but having him act normal around you was horrific in itself.
"Hey little guy," You greet the child, a smile on your lips as you reached down and stroked his ear. He giggled up at you just as the Mandalorian walked up the hatch and into the Crest.
"So," You began, watching him set down the bag of pucks he collected in town. He goes still for a moment, but keeps his helmet firmly away from you.
"So," He repeats, sounding utterly anxious but trying to play it cool. It makes humor curl in your gut and you decide to push you luck.
"What's the plan for today?" You ask, and from the sigh he lets out you can see he was expected something regarding last night.
"Picked up some pucks in town, we can go through 'em and see what we can do." He responds. You nod, reaching down a hand and letting the child play with you finger.
"So getting drunk isn't in the cards, then?"
The sharp intake of breath from the Mandalorian nearly makes you crack with laughter. You bite the inside of your cheek to keep your humor at just the smile on your lips.
"No." Din replies gruffly.
"That's a shame," You sigh, looking up at him finally to find him already facing you and the child, "I like drunk you. He's fun."
"I shouldn't have done that, I'm sorry." He states, making your humor dissipate in record speed. You hold his beskar-covered gaze for a moment, feeling the phantom scrape of his calloused hands on your skin and the touch of his lips to yours.
"Which part?" You ask, holding your breath in a way that made it clear whatever he said next would cement something between the two of you. He stays silent for a long while before walking up to you, the child between the two of you. He reaches down and strokes the kid's head lovingly before looking to you.
"Which part do you want to be the mistake?" Din whispers, the gravel of his tone silky smooth as it caresses you. He's playing with you, you suddenly realize. You played with him with the drunk comment and he's playing back, testing to see which of you will break first.
You have to smother your smile before it can make it to your face.
"Careful Mando," You respond, your tone barely stable, "You've got a clan of two to protect. I-"
"Three."
He interrupts you with such a sure, calm voice that you almost miss what he says, "What?" You whisper, your teasing gone.
"Three," Din repeats, "Clan of three."
Before you can respond, a nonsensical babble from below makes the two of you look down to see a confused and yet very aware child. His smalls hands are holding your fingers and Din's hand is on his ear, and for a moment it feels like the most natural thing in the world.
But then you and Din come to your senses, and you mutually decide to push off the game of testing the tension until it breaks again.
"We should go through those pucks," Din states, walking away and to the sack he set down earlier. With a smile that you're glad he doesn't see, you wonder how much longer you can go without telling him what he really is to you. You repeat what he said to you in your mind.
Clan of three.
Mando dumps out the bounty pucks, sorting through them as you lean against the wall, your arms crossed and giving your input with each one he clicks open.
"Another mercenary, set on Naboo." Mando announces, the picture of the target hovering over the puck. You click your tongue.
"After the Trandoshan, I think we should take a break from mercenaries," You advise, earning a nod of agreement from Din. He sets the puck aside and grabs another, clicking it on.
"This one's on Tatooine, but I think I'm ready to see something besides this desert planet," The Mandalorian notes, and you hum your agreement.
"Trees would be nice, like on Felucia" You add, an absentminded smile growing on your face, "Or maybe a nice water planet."
"Water and this armor don't go together, mesh'la"
You smirk at him from your spot at the wall, "All the more reason to go."
His sudden laugh is enough to make every sorrow remotely near your mind melt away. Everything is back to normal, everything is going well, everything is beautiful.
Until he clicks open the next puck.
That's when your world comes crashing down.
The silence that settles over the cabin is thick and unlike the comfortable one you are used to. Mando goes as still as death before you, his body taught under his armor. Horror, real and true, washes over every fiber of your being.
Because that's your picture on the bounty puck, and the one who put it out is Finon Kane.
No. No. This isn't real, this isn't happening.
Din says your name, slow and guarded.
No, not when everything was perfect. Not when you'd found your family, your clan.
You begin to shake your head, all of those years of torture and darkness roaring through your mind. You'd just begun to forget it all, truly forget it all.
But you guess it's true what they say, you really can't run from your past forever.
"Y/N, what-"
You're shoving through the Crest towards your room, leaving Din in stunned silence until he comes to his senses and follows.
"Where is it, where is it, where is it?" You mumble, blinding panic tearing you apart as you rummage wildly through your belongings. It only takes a few seconds before your hands close around your satchel, and your chest doesn't loosen even an inch when you lift it and find it still heavy with the item that is dooming you.
You clutch the satchel close and sling it across your body, standing to leave your room only to find Din blocking the path with his massive body.
"Cyar'ika, what's going on?" His voice is commanding as usual, but it holds an edge of panic that you can't deny.
You feel like a cornered animal, and your fingers clutch the strap of your bag tightly.
"Mando, move." You plead, moving to go around him only for him to grab your shoulders and pull you back.
"No, Mando move!' You beg, pulling against his hold, "Din please."
"Stop it!" He orders, holding you fast, his chest heaving with worried breaths. He stares at you for a moment before it seems to click in his mind, "What were you running from?"
You know what he refers to, you mind zipping back to that moment when you stowed away on his ship. Your silent for a long while, your panic not lowering an ounce. You've always felt safe with Din, always. You long to tell him everything, to let him help you because you know he'd never hunt you. You'd feel safe, but you wouldn't be safe.
The Mandalorian couldn't protect you from this, but you could protect him from it.
"I stole something," You whisper, your voice barely above a breath, "And my old master won't stop until he has it and me."
"What did you take?" Mando asks, his tone flooded with calculation as he tries to figure a way out of this, "If we hunt him down first, we can-"
"Din," Your voice breaks as you cut in, placing one hand on the beskar chest plate and longing for the feel of his skin again, "My reaper has come for me. And I can't let him take you too"
Before he can get out another sentence, you use your free hand to search in your satchel until your fingers close around the cool metal of what doesn't belong to you.
Then you pull out the lightsaber you stole and crack the butt of it so hard against the Mandalorian's helmet that he drops to the floor, unconscious.
He taught you that move with a blaster.
And now, you've saved his life with it.
You stand for a moment in silence, your heart slowly shattering in your chest as you look down at the love of your life. Tears cloud your vision, and you look up to see the child looking at you with confused eyes. You break, a sob wracking your body as you bend down to the Mandalorian's slumped body grip his gloved hand, pulling it up to place a kiss to his palm.
"I'm sorry," Your words mirror his from last night, and then you're pocketing the lightsaber that once belonged to the Empire and running out of the Razor Crest.
You're now his bounty, and if he knows what's good for him he'll let this one go.
Let you go.
||| Din Djarin
When the Mandalorian awoke, he was alone.
There was one heart-breaking moment of confusion as he sat up from his slumped position on the floor. It wasn't silent, but there was something missing in the array of noises. There was no laughter, no yelling. There was no light-hearted remarks, no sarcastic punches.
There was no her.
The thought jarred him so deeply from his newly-conscious muddled mind that he shoved himself to his feet, his heart pounding so loud in his chest that he could feel every thrum.
This wasn't happening. She wouldn't have just left, she wouldn't.
He stumbled out of her small room, his gaze wildly shooting around the Razor Crest. The child lay exactly where Din remembered, right before...
What the hell happened? How did he-
The memories came back in a rushâthe hand on his chest that had distracted him as her other hand grabbed something from her satchel, something metal and cylindrical. She'd hit him with it, whipped it across his head like he'd taught her. She must've gotten the blaster...no, it wasn't a blaster. It was...it was...
Stars
A lightsaber. She'd stolen a lightsaber all those months ago.
The thought made his head spin and it took a great deal of effort to keep his knees from buckling. Whenever she'd spoken of her past, it had been vague. Mentions of an Imperial encampment even after the Empire's fall, the shoving of her city into slavery, the torture she endured at the hands of her master.
The very thought made him clench his jaw. The first time she'd spoken about this Finon Kane, he'd wanted to find him and slaughter him with his bare hands for ever laying a finger on her. And now...now he had a bounty on her and Din wasn't there to protect her.
The thought spurred him back into action. Din scooped up the child into his hands before rocketing down the hatch of the Crest and towards where Peli worked with her droids. The mechanic seemed slightly nervous, almost as if she was avoiding his gaze.
"Mando, off to do a hunt?" She asked, trying to sound casual and failing. Din didn't falter as he walked up and shoved the child into her arms. Peli startled as she took the kid, looking up at Din with wide eyes. She couldn't see the Mandalorian's face, but it was clear to anyone the pure, guttural rage tangling with a panic he's never known.
"What-"
"Where did she go?" He demanded. The mechanic sputtered for a moment, holding the child close.
"I don't know what you mean," Peli tried, and Din almost growled.
"Peli if you don't tell me where she went I will rip your tongue out," Din snarled. The woman looked at him desperately, her gaze torn.
"She told me not to tell you, Mando. How do I know you're not going to..." Her words died out and it took every ounce of Din's restraint to keep from yelling again.
"Hurt her?" He finished for the mechanic, his voice just as lethal when it was quiet, "She's in danger, Peli. Real danger, and if you don't tell me where she went someone else is going to find her first and she'll...she'll-"
He could't get the words out, couldn't hide the panic flooding his tone. Din didn't know what he'd do if someone else found her first, he couldn't even comprehend that she wasn't with him right now. He didn't think he'd ever have to know what it felt like for her to be absent. The mechanic softened immediately, letting out a long sigh.
"She didn't say exactly where she was going," Peli finally admitted, holding the kid tighter, "Just that she needed to get as far away as she could as fast as possible. When I asked, she said something remote, something green. She took the spare ship in the hangar an hour ago."
Mando didn't need an exact answer to know where she was going, he knew. With a brisk nod of his head, he gestured at the kid as he walked towards the Crest, "Watch him for me?"
Peli nodded, "Of course. Do you think she'll...do you think she'll be okay?"
The Mandalorian stopped, looking over his shoulder slightly so that the mechanic was in this peripheral vision.
"If she isn't, I'll burn the planet down."
With that he was getting on the Crest, his heart hammering in his chest and fear, real fear, flooding every part of his being. He shut the hatch and practically vaulted into the cockpit. Din threw himself into the captain's seat and swiveling to face the control panel. He didn't hesitate as he put in the coordinates. She mentioned trees earlier, and he knew the way she thought, knew she was smart enough to go somewhere with more jungles than cities right now.
Felucia.
He'd go, he'd find her, he'd knock her upside the head for running away from him, and he'd get her back.
And stars help anyone heâs found has so much as touched her.
||| You
It was strange, being on the run again.
Even though it hadn't even been a full year since you last were sprinting from your reaper, it has felt like a lifetime because of your company. Time slowed down with Din Djarin, and for a long while you felt safe, protected, home.
And now you were scrambling around, planet to planet, in the dark alleyways and through dense, uninhabited forests to put distance between you and...
You stopped for a moment, your back pressed up against a tree in the rich, winding forest of Felucia. Who were you trying to put distance between?
Finon Kane, his squadron of stormtroopers, and the only real family you've ever had.
That last one sent a spear of heart-wrenching pain racketing through you. Typical, so very typical, to find something so worth having and to think the galaxy would let you keep it. This galaxy was cold and cruel, it was a better thief than you'd ever be and you knew it, you knew it. And yet you let yourself get close anyways. It's a strange thing what love can do. It made you reckless enough to think that for once, just once, the galaxy would let you make it away with what you found.
It turns out you aren't as good of a thief as you thought, because the happiness you stole has been returned, and your time playing at a good life has run out.
You picked up your brutal pace again, trekking through the jungle and refusing to stop for even the barest of needs unless it was unavoidable. This would never end, this hunt. As you moved, the lightsaber in your bag banged against your hip, reminding you of what had gotten you into this mess in the first place.
You shouldn't have taken it, you really shouldn't have, but you couldn't stand to watch Master Kane take another slave's life with a weapon that didn't belong to him. He'd found it in the rubble of the fallen Empire and he thought he was entitled to it. It had been used as a weapon of terror during the Imperial rule and then after because of your master, and taking it? You'd not only done it so the weapon could be given back to the New Republic where it belonged, but because after everything he'd done to you, after all of the scars you bore because of Finon Kane, you'd wanted to hurt him. You had wanted him to feel every ounce of pain and desperation you had, and for that cause, you were willing to pay the price that was now due.
The jungle-covered planet would do well to hide you for a little while, give you time to gather up some credits in case you needed to run again. You walk around a grove of trees, the jungle beginning to thin the closer you get to a city. As you do, a sound you're all too familiar with makes you stop dead in your tracks.
A steady beeping, consistently increasing as it gets louder.
A tracking fob.
You barely have time to scramble around to the back of a thick tree when a blaster sounds out behind you, singing the side of the tree where you'd just been standing.
"Come on out, thief! I get more credits for bringing you in alive." The gruff voice of a bounty hunter wafts out to you, a hint of smugness in her tone.
Your mind is grappling for options as you sprint away from your tree and towards another thicket up ahead. Your feet are silent on the grassy floor and you deftly miss any roots in your path, so the bounty hunter doesn't notice you at first. When she does, it's made known by the firing of the blaster at your back.
Gratefully, the hunter has horrible aim.
Blast after blast burn into the trees around you, so you continue to stick close to them as you run. How the hunter found you is incomprehensible, but you don't waste time worrying about that matter and sprint for your life towards the city that thrives just outside the jungle's end. The only tricky thing would be making it across the large clearing between the end of the trees you were approaching and the city gates up ahead.
"Get back here!" The hunter shouts to you, falling further and further behind.
You allow the hint of a smile, but don't dare to slow down. The end of the jungle is growing nearer, and it's only a minute or so of sprinting before you're at the city g-
Another bounty hunter steps out from around the last tree in the clearing, a blaster held lazily in his hands. You skid to a stop so suddenly that your feet slip on the floor and you have to catch yourself with a hand to the jungle floor to keep from falling on your ass. You whirl around to go back the way you came only to come face to face with the other hunter ho had already been pursuing you approaching, her chest heaving with breath but her blaster lifted nonetheless.
"Nowhere to run, thief," The one behind you lilts, his voice heavy with experience and sounding almost bored, "Surrender now and I'll let you keep your life."
"I saw her first, the bounty's mine!" The first hunter grits, her eyes flicking from your face and to the hunter behind you. You turn halfway to keep them both in your vision, your heart pounding in your chest.
"You would've lost her if it wasn't for me," The other counters, both of their blasters lowered slightly. You would make a run for it, but you're directly in the middle of the quarrel, and they'd have you dead in seconds. So, you do the only thing that can save you, the thing you've wanted to do for months now.
You pull the lightsaber from your satchel, clutch it in both hands, and turn it on.
The argument between the hunters dies as a burning blade, as red as death and blood and anguish, ignites into the green of the forest. The two colors clash, one seeming wrong with the other, but you clutch it nonetheless and move before they can lift their weapons again.
"That's a..." The male hunter stands shell-shocked, his words dying as he watches you advance on the female hunter who has already begun firing at you.
You're clumsy with the foreign weapon, but her bad aim and you're mild understand of how to move the saber allows the blasts and blade of the same color to clash as they collide, saving you from the death her weapon assures.
Her weapon may bring death, but yours is death.
She nearly blasts your head off, but you manage to shove the lightsaber through her middle before she gets another shot out. Her strangled gasp followed by the thud of her body into the ground nearly makes you falter, but the sound of the other hunter approaching snaps you out of your own mind. It was you or them, you assure yourself.
You'd wounded the other hunter quickly, grounding him before turning the saber off and sprinting for the city ahead. As you did, you shoved the blade into your satchel and barreled through the open gates, the merchants and travelers bustling through gasping and yelping as you shoved through them. The second you were inside, you stopped running and allowed yourself to meld into the crowd, walking in their flow and moving in their manners. It was mere seconds before you were blended into their midst, the only difference between you and them being your heaving chest and singed clothes from a blast or two that got dangerously close.
You thought you'd made it out before a figure shot out of the alleyway you were passing.
A gasp left your lips as they grabbed you and tugged you inside faster than you could comprehend. Before you could reach for the saber in your satchel, the bag was ripped clean off your shoulder, nearly dislocating the limb in the process and making a cry of pain leave your lips. The sound couldn't even make it fully out before you were being pressed against the sand wall of a building with the steel edge of a blade at your throat.
Your eyes were wide and wild as they took in your surroundingsâtwo hunters surrounded you expectantly, not counting the one holding you at knifepoint. They must have agreed to a split bounty and a temporary alliance.
"Check the bag," The one holding you grunts out. On command, one of the two standing around you searches the bag he'd ripped clean off, his hand rummaging through until a sickening smile lit up his lips. Slowly, he pulled the lightsaber out.
"It's here." His response was smug and nauseating. You knew this was going to happen, but you thought you'd have a least a bit more time before it did.
"Haven't seen a real lightsaber before," The other muses, the two of them in the back looking over the silver and gold-plated handle, "You're going to make us rich, girl"
"Give it-" You struggled against the hold of the hunter only for the knife to cut down into the tender skin of your neck, making your words collapse into a breathy cry of pain. He kept the knife embedded slightly into your skin, his eyes boring into yours as a smirk captured his lips, "Move again, and I'll knick an artery on accident. Then, we can see how long it will take for the life to drain out of your eyes."
The word accident rolled off his tongue with a promise, and you fought back a shiver of fear. The press of the burning steel in your flesh was agonizing, and you realized all at once that you were going to die. Whether it was here and now with this group of hunters or when they handed you off to Finon Kane, you were going to die.
The thought made your body grow suddenly cold.
You'd spent so many years thinking that you'd never have a family again, that you'd never know what it meant to love and be loved. It became your bleak reality, and then you quite literally stumbled into the two individuals that would become your entire world.
It was selfish of you to stay, so damn selfish. Deep down, you had known that Kane would put a bounty on your head, that he'd find you one day and make you pay for every bit of trouble he'd endured because of you. Yet you did it anyway. You stayed and you let yourself grow attached beyond hope.
You let yourself fall in love, and that was possibly the worst of the sins you'd committed.
And, just like the other sins, you had thought you could run from that one, thought its penance would never arrive. Now here you were, facing death at the hands of those in the very same profession as your Mandalorian while he was far away on Tatooine, probably wondering what had gone wrong. You knew you'd hurt both him and the child by leaving, but you would rather they be hurt and alive than dead.
"Now," The one holding you announces, stepping back and easing the knife out of your throat, "It's time to bring you to your master in top shape."
You barely had time to register the warm blood trickling down your neck from the cut of the hunter's knife before his fist was cracking against your cheek. The force of the unexpected blow slammed your head into the wall and brought you crashing to the ground. Your groan was just out of your mouth when the next blow came, this one to your ribs. A cry of pure agony slipped out as a loud crack resounded amongst your rib cage with the powerful kick, making tears collect in your eyes.
You felt utterly helpless as you desperately tried to lift yourself off of the ground, but you were so tired. You were utterly exhausted, and it took every ounce of your strength to pull out your beskar knife and slash the tendons along the back of one of the hunter's heels. Purple blood sprayed and he shouted, collapsing to the floor beside you.
"Get back here, you little bitch!" One seethed, grabbing you by your hair and yanking you up to your knees. Before your eyes could focus on where he was, you slashed with your knife. He must have seen it coming because he grabbed your wrist in a bruising grip.
"Drop the knife," He growled, one of his hunter companions still on the floor clutching his ankle and the other standing by the one who held you, the lightsaber handle in his hands.
"Give me the saber," You bargained breathlessly, your voice crutched with torment.
The hunters didn't like that very much, and the one holding the saber slammed it against your cheek. You took the hit with a groan, enough pain already crawling through you that you barely even felt it.
"This isn't a negotiation," The one holding you gritted, "Drop. The. Knife."
It was stupid, and you knew that you should just listen at this point, but you couldn't stop yourself from lifting your chin stubbornly and holding his gaze, "You'll have to break my hand."
"With pleasure," He snarled, his grip tightening on your wrist. Before he could snap it, a low, modulated voice rasped into the alley.
"Break her hand, and I'll make sure your death is the slowest."
You shut your eyes instantly, your shoulders loosening with both relief and agony. He'd come for you. Din had found you, and you couldn't stop the bittersweet feeling crashing through your soul. You wanted to hate him for it, wanted to scream at him and knock the sense of your desertion into his brain. But you knew you weren't capable of hating Din Djarin, not even if you wanted to. Especially not now as he stood like a dark angel in the entrance to the alleyway, glowering with rage wholly directed at the hunters left standing.
"This is our bounty, Mandalorian," The one holding the lightsaber sneered, "Find another-"
He was dead before his sentence could complete, his neck twisted at a wrong angle from where Mando had snapped it with his bare hands.
That made the one holding your wrist let go of you instantly.
"Y-You can have her, she's all y-yours Mandalorian." He stumbled back, running into his downed companion who had finally managed to limp to his feet.
Din didn't respond as he stooped slowly, grabbing the lightsaber and slipping it along his holster. He was as silent as death as he stalked up to you, his beskar clinking slightly in the tense silence. You were still on the floor, your skin bloody and your heart pounding so fast you thought it would burst. You wanted to crash into him and hold him, never letting go. You wanted to let him take you back to the Razor Crest and help you figure all of this out. You were safe with him. But he wasn't safe with you, and neither was the child. You had to protect the child, you had to protect Din.
The two remaining hunters were frozen in terror, trapped in the dead end alley like cornered prey. Din stopped in front of you, his mask peered down at you as his hand reached out. Much gentler than you could even imagine, his hand softly gripped your chin and tilted it upwards and to the side so he could see the blossoming, nasty bruise on your cheek.
His gentle fingers were in a fierce dichotomy with the rigid, furious posture of his body. Mando slid them down, leaving lightning where he touched as he lightly traced the cut in your neck. Your gaze locked with his mask, and he held it for a long minute. Then, he dropped his hand and cocked his head over at the two hunters.
"Which one cut you, cyar'ika?" His voice was dark and tender all at once, and it sent a shiver racing down your spine.
"The one limping," You responded without hesitation, your eyes up on him as he nodded once and began to stalk towards the two hunters.
Confusion rippled across their features, and the one who hadn't cut you was quick to shove his ally in front of him. Their loyalty only ran monetary, and even though you knew it wouldn't save his life he had to try.
"What are you doing? I t-thought you were a hunter!" The hunter who the Mandalorian had his sights on was shaking with terror, and it brought you a wicked sense of justice.
"I am."
The next few moments passed in a mess of beskar and knives and blood. The last remaining hunter could only watch in horror as Din ripped his colleague apart with a confidence that could make any skilled fighter wary. The man's pleas and cries were shrill, and the people on the main road were wise enough to keep walking as they passed.
Then, it was quiet. And Din turned to the last hunter pressed against the wall across from you.
"No, please. I'll tell you anything you want, I'll give you anything please!" He begged, but his hurried words were cut off by Din's hand on his throat. He tugged the hunter close, his beskar helmet splattered with blood.
"If you find anyone taking her bounty, tell them what happened here. Make sure they know they will suffer the same fate. Understand?" Din's tone was taught with thinly veiled anger, and you could tell that it was an effort to keep from killing the man.
The hunter nodded briskly, his eyes wide and his legs trembling. When the Mandalorian finally released him, he was sprinting out of the alley, leaving a tense silence to settle over the two of you that remained. Din turned towards where you still sat on the ground, and as he walked over you were suddenly aware of the conversation that was about to happen, the anger he was about to rain upon you.
Mando extended a hand down to you, which you took and gladly accepted his help as you stood. Your hand gingerly pressed against your cracked rib, every breath and every minuscule movement sending sharp, shooting pain through the area, "You alright?"
"I will be," You nearly whispered, you eyes locked onto his brooding, helmeted stare. There was only mere inches between the two of you, and you knew that if you stayed this close, you wouldn't be able to leave again. You went to step back, but he tightened his hold on your hand enough to keep you close.
"Let me go," You breathed, the words meaning more than just physically.
"What the hell were you thinking?" Din gritted out, his voice conveying the worry and hurt and anger that his mask hid. His voice broke your heart.
"Din, you have to let me go." You were almost begging now, and you could feel the tears welling in your eyes. He shifted his hold so that he was holding both of your hands, probably to keep you from reaching for the saber at his belt.
"Not again," He vowed, his usually collected voice portraying how barely bridled his emotions were, "Not until you tell me why the hell you left me."
You were silent for a moment, trying desperately to find a way to speak without showing just how deeply this was shattering your heart, your soul.
"Did you really think I would turn you in? That I would collect your bounty?" Din asked finally, his voice breaking.
"No," Your shaky voice finally began to work, growing stronger by the moment, "That's the thing, Mando. You wouldn't, which means when these hunters came looking for me, they'd find you and the child."
"You think I can't protect you?"
"Din, I have never known safety until I met you," You swore, the tears collecting in your eyes beginning to fall, "But the man who's hunting me, Finon Kane? He will stop at nothing until he has me and the lightsaber. If I had stayed, I would be giving you and the child a death sentence."
"Y/N, you're staying with me." The Mandalorian asserts, his voice trembling. You shake your head, your tears falling steadier now.
"Din please, you have to leave me here. Protect the child, it's your duty. You have to forget you ever knew me, forget I was ever with you, forget me."
"You think I could do that?" He cuts in abruptly, tugging you closer to show the urgency and truth of his words, "You think I could ever walk away and just forget you?"
His words were dangerous, and you tried to stop him, "DIn-"
"You have ruined me, ner cyar'ika. Every moment I spend away from you is torture, it's a moonless night that never ends."
His words leave you breathless, your eyes wide and your heart stumbling in your chest as you try and fail to find a response. He won't let you speak, though.
"The child and you? You are my clan, my family. You two are all that I have, and I am nothing without you," He's so close now that you can almost hear the unmodulated tone of his voice. Din lets go of one of your hands to rest at the base of your neck and bring your head close to his. What he does next...it's a moment that will forever be etched into your brain.
He brings his forehead to yours, and he leaves it there for a moment. The cool metal of his helmet bleeds into your skin, and you can't stop the soft gasp that leaves your lips. You grab onto his beskar-plated chest for support because you know what this is. On easy nights, Din would often sit and tell you stories of the Mandalorian culture. He spoke once or twice of the Keldabe kiss, a gesture meant to show love and affection. The meaning of this moment was not lost on you, and it nearly ripped out your heart to think that he could...that he could love you back. He possibly loved you and now you were about to die.
"I'm not leaving you," Din murmured, the cool beskar of his mask pulling away from your forehead. You felt the cool metal of something pressing into your hands and you look down to see him handing you the lightsaber, "We'll end this together."
You couldn't look away from him, couldn't bring yourself to walk away again. You were being selfish and stupid, but with what just happened, with what Din had just said, you couldn't leave him.
You simply nodded, "Okay."
Din nodded as well, stepping back from you, "Okay."
There was a moment of tension between the two of you, a moment where each was waiting for the other to say something more, to mention those three words that had yet to be spoken. You watched him walk towards the alley exit, following slowly behind. He'd begun to say some sort of strategy, but you weren't listening. You didn't know what was going to happen next, you didn't know how much time you had. You needed to say it, and you needed to say it now before you lost this chance.
"Mando?" You cut in, making him pause and look over at you as you entered the streets of Felucia, "I love you"
The Mandalorian froze, his muscles going taught. The bustling world around you seemed to dull for a moment, and all that was left was you and him. Your heart pounding in your chest and you felt your breaths getting shorter and shorter as you waited for his response.
You heard Din take in a breath to respond, but someone beat him to it.
"So this is what you've been doing all this time."
It was your turn to freeze, and your gaze was still locked on the Mandalorian's as your eyes went wide with fear, with terror. You knew that voice. You'd know that voice if the galaxy ended and then begun again a hundred times over.
Slowly, you turned to face Master Finon Kane and the six storm troopers that flanked him.
"I believe you have something of mine," Kane cut straight to the chase, his troopers making quick work of clearing the street while he stood not ten paces from you. Your fingers tightened around the handle of the lightsaber still in your grasp, and you saw Kane's eyes dart down to it.
"Hand it over now, and I might consider killing you. Your Mandalorian doesn't scare me."
There was no hiding the blatant horror inundating you. Those words, you knew what they meant. You preferred death to what you knew life with Kane would promise. Staring into his eyes, you were reliving every moment of pain you'd endured at his handsâevery beating, execution, and humiliation, they haunted you.
You didn't know when Din had moved to your side, but you felt the nudge of his body next to yours, and it knocked you from your spiral. He was letting you know that he was there, that he wasn't going anywhere. And, looking at the odds, you could honestly say that the two of you had fared worse.
âStand down and Iâll make your death quick,â you fire back, your voice surprisingly strong. Kane barked out a laugh as the six troopers fell into line behind him.
"You can't kill me, pet. You know it and so do I." With a flick of his fingers, his troopers were moving, two next to Kane and four fanning out in front of us.
"I know that," You responded quietly, but not weakly. Your fingers barely brushed against Din's hand, the movement so small it was imperceptible to those before you, but the way his fingers touched yours gave you the assurance that you were about to make the right move, "But he can."
The troopers couldn't even raise their blasters before Din and you moved on them. The next few moments were a blur, shining beskar and frantic blasts missing their targets as Din cut down the troopers with ease. You could hear feel the blast of the fire caster on his wrist as he incinerated two more.
He had four dead before you could even turn on the lightsaber.
Your eyes shot to Kane's, whose were wide with shock and a bleat of panic when he saw your hands move to grasp the lightsaber before you.
"Don't-"
His cry died in his throat when the red saber born of a bleeding, hate-filled kyber crystal ignited before you. You barely new how to use it, but it wasn't difficult to shove the burning side into the armor of the troopers.
Then, it was silent.
Din sauntered up beside you, standing tall and strong with his helmet cocked intimidatingly at Kane. You didn't turn off the lightsaber, but let its red light cast a vengeful glow across your features.
"You think you're so clever," Finon Kane spat, his desperation betraying him, "You think you could so easily b-"
His words were cut off by the hiss of a lightsaber meeting flesh, and something in your chest loosened as you looked up from where you had shoved the saber deep into his belly. Your old master's eyes were wide and his mouth gaping. He was shocked, he really hadn't thought you could do it.
"For every friend of mine you slaughtered," You grit out, shoving the lightsaber an inch deeper and making him cry out in pain, "Their souls are avenged."
He was dead before his body hit the ground, and you simply sheathed your lightsaber, looked to your Mandalorian, and walked away. You didn't realize that you were trembling until the two of you walked outside the city gates and Din's hand grabbed onto yours, large and warm and sure. The Razor Crest sat waiting ahead of you, and you nearly buckled and sobbed in relief.
"It's over," You whispered, you eyes dazed and your words no more than a breath as the gravity of what just happened crashed over you.
You stopped walking in front of your beloved ship, turning to face Din as he did you, "I'm...I'm free"
You let out a breathy, wild, joyous laugh and launched forward, wrapping your arms around the Mandalorian's neck. He paused only for a moment before you felt him melt into you, his hands slipping around your waist and holding you closer than life.
"Thank you, Din," You whispered, your words a vow and a prayer, "I am forever in your debt."
His hold on you tightened, one hand slipping up your back to hold more of you to him, "You owe me nothing. Your life is yours to hold, you are no longer in the service of any master."
Tears you hated to acknowledge slipped down your cheeks, and you were glad to be pressed so close to him so that he couldn't see them fall. He knew, though. He knew.
You didn't want to pull away, didn't want to know again what it felt like to be away from him. Eventually, it could not be avoided. You wanted to get on the Crest and fly away from this place, to bring your life back to the normal you'd fallen so deeply in love with, the one with the child and the bounties and the adventure and him. Especially him.
"Now," You announced, your tone light and jovial as you pulled away and looked up at Mando with a smile, "Where's the child? I'm sure he's been miserable without me,"
You began to walk up to the Crest, but you hadn't realized that the Mandalorian hadn't followed you until his voice called out and made you pause.
"He's with Peli, safe and sound."
You stopped in your step and turned around to see Din walking slowly up to where you stood. Something in his tone made your heart jolt. Your voice was no more than an unsure whisper when you spoke next, "That's good."
Din hummed, and the sound made every thought abandon your mind. He stopped in his gait when he was just in front of you, but not as close as you thought he'd be.
"Are we going to...get on the ship?" You asked, for the first time unaware of what he was going to do next.
"We will," He finally responded, taking one step closer to you and suddenly making you realize why he'd left the room that was quickly dissipating. He was torturing you, playing with you, and once again uncaged butterflies swarmed your insides, "But first, I want to talk about what you said earlier."
His voice was low and smooth and sure, in direct contrast to your trembling one as you tried to act cool. He was making you squirm and he loved it, "You'll have to be more specific, Mando."
Din took that last step closer to you, nearly closing the gap as he tilted his masked face down at you in a way that had your head spinning, "You know what I'm talking about, mesh'la."
You grappled for a response, you really did, but you didn't know what to say, didn't know how you could possibly respond cooly to that.
"Look at you, finally the speechless one." His voice was taunting and you could hear the smile in it. He grew more serious as he slowly pulled off one of his gloves and achingly slow brought his calloused hand to brush against your cheek. His skin on yours again almost had you buckling to the ground.
"Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum, cyar'ika," Din's words blanketed over you with such a tenderness that your mind raced to understand what they meant. You didn't have to think long, because Din held your chin and brought his beskar-masked forehead to yours, "I love you too, sweetheart."
In all the years of captivity under the Imperial rule on Corrida, you never thought you'd hear those words again, I love you. They were sacred and seldom spoken, and you had stopped hearing them long before your family was taken from you. And now here you were, pressed close to Din Djarin, a Mandalorian whose ship you stowed away on in pure coincidence, and you were hearing those words be said to you in a way that no one had before.
His voice was quiet and playful as he leaned closer to your ear, "And I've got plenty of ways to show it once you get your ass on the damn ship."
Din stepped back from you and turned, walking to the Crest as if he hadn't just promised you everything you've been dreaming of for months. With your pulse thrumming wildly, you followed after him.
"What about the lightsaber? We need to return it to the New Republic," You called out.
The hatch opened to the crest and he walked in without looking back, "They can wait. I can't."
Your cheeks were warm with a blush as you followed him into the Crest, and you couldn't help but wonder how you'd gotten this lucky, what you had done to deserve this. You didn't know, but all you knew was that you'd waited for long, torturous years to have the freedom of forever, and here it was. Here he was. Din Djarin was your forever, no matter how long the breath was left in your lungs.
Your past had finally died, and the ghosts had stopped haunting you. Your present was now your future, and you'd never look back again.
#the mandalorian#mandalorian x reader#mandalorian x you#din djarin#din djarin x female reader#din djarin x reader#din djarin x you#din djarin oneshot#din djarin angst#din djarin fluff#mandalorian oneshot#the mandalorian x reader#din x female reader#din x reader#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader
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The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.
[Twst x ObeyMe!AFAB!reader]
CHP. 7
Again, I thank y'all for the reblogs, likes and comments guys, it really helps me :)
CW: Blue pronouns or address for MC every time they get mistaken for a guy. Also, I'm a potty mouth so MC is too.
Inhale..
Exhale....
Inhale......
Exhale.......
Inhale.........
Ex-fucking-hale.......
You're about to have a stroke right now.
You should've just went back to the goddamn infirmary instead of checking in on these obnoxious, bitch-less, probably father-less, motherfuckers.
It's just cleaning windows!! How the hell can you mess up like this?! Why the fuck did the cafeteria chandelier get involved??
GODDAMNIT!! WHY IS YUU INVOLVED AS WELL?! AHHHHâ!
*One eternity of screaming like a banshee later*
After sending those damn kids and cat away to get some sort of magical stone in some godforsaken mine, you wrangled with the headmaster for at least two hours to prevent him from writing up the expulsion papers of Yuu and that Blue-haired kid who was mostly innocent about the ordeal.
(Meanwhile, encouraging him to kick that Ace kid and the damn cat off the school. You ain't about to let audacity run free rn, mostly because you feel yourself start genuinely tweaking as you almost got possessed by the urge to sucker punch someone's soul out of their body.)
[Satan perked up, there it was again.
That distinctive spark of wrath that he can feel through your pact with him is both concerning and comforting.
On one hand, the anger he feels means that you're alive. And seeing that what he's feeling through the pact is mostly annoyance, then that must mean that nothing marginally bad or traumatizing had happened to you yet.
You're actually more pissed off in a 'someone-had-the-audacity-to-eat-my-snacks' kind of way more than anything else, meaning that you're safe for now.
But on the other hand, he doesn't know how long that temporary safety will last.
There's also the fact this is the fourth time he'd felt that spark of 'I-wanna-punt-someone-into-the-fuckin-sun' kind of anger from you, which is worrying because it hasn't even been 48 hours since you were kidnapped by some mf.
He shook his head, calling upon a subordinate (read: Devoted fan) to collect more and more books to learn what type of teleportation and sleeping magic was used in your kidnapping.
With the massive search party spanning all three realms that they'd called upon, they will find you sooner or later.
And once they do...
Well... You'll need to get used to being with someone at all hours of the day.]
*Passive-aggresively reminding Crowley that he can't kick out an innocent kid for something they didn't directly do as they had no way of stopping the events that transpired.*
["You don't want the word to get out that you let an innocent teen roam around in a foreign world with absolutely nothing to their name and nobody to protect them, right?"
"That is true, but I still can't just let this go unpunisâ"
"Especially when it's the school's faulty equipment that took them so far away from all of their loved ones and belongings, right?"]
Needless to say, Yuu ended up being "fired" in the end, quite an unfortunate result because they will need to freeload off of you until the end of your stay in this world. (Poor them, they got fired before they knew that they had a job in the first place.)
Oh well, it's better than being kicked out from practically their only way back home right now...
Hays... That cruel crow..
Anygays, it's time to snoop around and hopefully make some connections to the residents of this school.
This is a well-known college, right? So there should be influential people here somewhere...
Hehe.. It's time you bring out your gaslight, gatekeep, gold-digging skills so that you can girlboss your way into stability inside this foreign world.
⢠⢠⢠⢠⢠â˘
Suddenly, more than a dozen individuals felt a strong shiver run up their spines.
Haha... Well that's ominous!
⢠⢠⢠⢠⢠â˘
Ortho deadpanned at his brother.
It seems that almost burning down their dorm room last night isn't enough to deter him from making his [Mr. L/n x reader] fanfiction complete with mandatory fan art for every single chapter.
Haaa....
But at least his brother isn't 'fanboying' about another fictional character again...
Hm... Now that he thinks about it..
Maybe his brother will be more inclined to make friends if it's Mr. L/n!
And thus begins Ortho's journey of being an unknowing wingman as he tries to get his introverted brother to make friends.
⢠⢠⢠⢠⢠â˘
You narrowed your eyes as you looked at the small gift on top of your temporary bed in the infirmary.
Dats suspicious....
Dats weird......
You turn your necklace into a staff and start poking the box, trying to see if it'll suddenly turn into a horrific eldritch monster and jump you. (Won't be the first time that happened.)
⢠⢠⢠⢠â˘
"It is done, ĂĂĂ ĂĂ ĂĂĂĂĂĂ" (This is too easy to guessđ)
⢠⢠⢠⢠â˘
Diavolo sighed for the tenth time that hour, lamenting how trying to focus on his paperwork is a really hard task when MC gets thrown into the situation.
'Maybe a small break will help clear my head?'
He might as well just go out for a walk in the garden to get some fresh... air...
Oh? what is this?
His eyes scanned the dark envelope he'd seen wedged under the 'To burn' stack of paperwork in his desk.
This envelope wasn't here yesterday...
After confirming that the piece of paper wasn't cursed or charmed, he opened it with apprehension.
...!
This..!
⢠⢠⢠⢠â˘
Barbatos appeared in the office, tense as he'd heard his lord call out his name with haste.
Reading the letter shoved in front of his face by the serious Diavolo, Barbatos made a mental note to get the dungeon chambers ready.
They've got themselves a lead.
â Pr.6 | Chapter List | Chp. 1.1 â
Just tell me if y'all wanna get added in the permanent taglist, even if I already tagged y'all here.
That's just so I'll know if you wanna get tagged in all the upcoming chapters of this fanfic.
@caprinaesprout
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@a-traveling-void-human
Reblog or I'll take your anklesđ (Pls like and reblog, it really gives me motivationđĽş)
Also, the next chap is the start of Arc 1: Satan but short.
#obey me#obey me shall we date#crossover#obey me lucifer x reader#obey me mammon x reader#obey me leviathan x reader#obey me satan x reader#obey me asmo x reader#obey me beelzebub x reader#obey me belphagor x reader#obey me barbatos x reader#obey me diavolo x reader#obey me mephisto x mc#obey me solomon x reader#obey me simeon x reader#twst x obey me#obey me x twst#twst x reader#twst#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#obey me x twisted wonderland#x reader#reader insert#polyamory#fanfic
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small touches, pink cheeks.Â
charles leclerc x f!readerÂ
pt.2!
 *ŕŠâŠâ§âË
a/n: this is the first fic iâve ever written so please excuse any mistakes or errors in my writing! Any tips are welcomed and very appreciated. hope you guys enjoy this! let me know if anyone would like a part two. <3
summary: the start of the 2023 season, Bahrain in early march. you'd recently joined the sky team, working as a news reporter and interviewer for your beloved sport.it's your first week and a mix of nerves and anticipation swirl together in your stomach. you're giddy to finally meet who youâd be working with for the next few months⌠but what happens when an instant connection sparks up between the new girl and Ferrari's golden boy?Â
warnings: light cursing, kind of angst? idk. sort of enemies to lovers? reader is annoyed at Charles :(
word count:Â 1.8k
thursday, march 2nd 2023.Â
a small breeze creeps through your window and goosebumps arise on your skin. you can hear your alarm angrily blaring on your phone, but you hadn't woken up yet fully and your brain was still in a haze. suddenly your eyes snap open as you realise what day it is. it's race week and you should be heading off to the airport in around three hours, shit.Â
you sigh the same dramatic sigh you had been doing since you were a little girl and roll your eyes. contemplating whether or not to risk another five minutes of blissful sleep. luckily you come to your senses before making that grave mistake. your feet pad lightly across your bedroom floor and into the bathroom, you pause and look around your room realising that from now on you're going to be on the move for a solid 6 months. it's worth it though, this career you had been working toward since you were in high school, and you're proud of yourself to have finally got here.Â
the cool shower water finished off the job of waking you up and after spending a little too much time getting ready you were packed and heading off to the airport.Â
ââââ âś âŰŞ ď˝ĄË â§
the flight went quickly, considering the ample amounts of work you had to complete before landing, but you managed to get it all done on the plane with a little bit of rushing. you hadn't had time to travel much during your childhood or during college so you were practically squealing with excitement when you emerged from the plane and began your journey to the hotel you were staying in.Â
the taxi was stuffy and warm, and your excitement started to be replaced with nerves as you realised that soon you would be in the heat of the paddock, meeting with very important people and drivers.Â
you always had a natural ability to make people feel comfortable and this helped you in becoming an interviewer, plus the three years of journalism school you just about survived. It had been a wild ride, but you were finally here, in bahrain, about to be introduced to your new life.Â
after getting yourself set up in your hotel and ready for the rest of the afternoon you began making your way over to the race venue. it was huge, but empty due to the fact that the race was in a few days. The only people around were a few race engineers and team members who were discussing strategy for the upcoming race. you were looking for someone in particular, your boss who you'd met before in london. stumbling through the paddock you finally found where the sky hq was situated and after making quick friends with the rest of your interviewing team, some of whom you knew from back home, you all decided to go out for some drinks.Â
the night moved fast and before you knew it you were making your way back to the hotel at an unreasonably late time and collapsed onto the bed, tiredness taking over your whole body.Â
friday , march 3rd 2023.Â
regret washed over your body as you woke up in your hotel room, your alarm blaring at you at a completely unreasonable time. you swiftly began getting ready for the day ahead, your first day. nerves overtake your body again completely during your short walk to the circuit, it was already swarming with fans, ready to watch the free practice after missing their sport for a few months. the staff entrance was hidden away and luckily not too busy, so you managed to sneak in on time.Â
you greeted your team who you'd already become quick friends with yesterday and they began briefing you on the timing of the day and when you would be interviewing the drivers. you had been told that this morning you were meant to go over to the ferraris section of the paddock and conduct a fun interview with leclerc and sainz. some silly questionnaire to test their knowledge of one another by asking them some, in your opinion, very personal questions. of course you smiled heartily and agreed, after all this was your job and you were excited to meet all of the drivers, having loved f1 since you were little.Â
you made your way over to the ferrari area, and you and the filming crew were kindly greeted by their pr team who directed into a room and informed you that the two drivers would be there shortly. nerves started to bubble up in your stomach, even though you were confident and knew that you were good at your job sometimes meeting new people stressed you out a little more than you liked to admit.Â
shuffling and muffled voices were heard outside of the door and the suddenly it opened and you were greeted with two handsome faces, both smiling politely at you and they outstretched their hands for you to take. you quickly grabbed the spaniards hand and shook it.Â
âmr sainz, its a pleasure to meet you, im y/n im going to be hosting your interview today.â
his smile grew a little wider and he chuckled, âplease call me carlos, and its lovely to meet you too y/n.â you blushed a little at how he said your name in his accent and smiled at him. your eyes then landed on the monegasque next to you, his smile remained on his face but his eyes were unreadable and intimated you a little bit. his eyes raked over your form and then he also outstretched his hand. his grip was much firmer than carlosâ and he began speaking before you.Â
âcharles, I'm looking forward to working with you y/n.â his eyes then returned to their initial softness and his grip loosed. you were a little taken aback but quickly composed yourself. you just simply nodded your head in response and softly spoke out a small âme too.â
that interaction stumped you, and you were clearly flustered but the rest of the interview went smoothly and you had played the quiz game, the two men laughing throughout and their childish rivalry entertained you more than you liked to admit. but throughout the interview you had felt charles' eyes on you more than once. once you dared to meet his gaze, but as soon as you did he quickly looked ack at his teammate and continued with the game nonchalantly.Â
maybe you were just making this up, you didn't know. but no one had ever looked at you the way charles did and it made an odd feeling rise up in your stomach.after the interview ended the two men shook your hand again and began to leave, having to get ready for free practice which was starting in a few hours.
the filming crew packed up and left. you turned your back and let out a sigh at the odd experience. shuffling through your bag for your phone you heard someone clear their throat behind you and your body snapped back and spun around. to your surprise charles was stood their. the same unreadable expression on his face which made your cheeks burn straight away. you looked around awkwardly, silence engulfed the room and you didn't know if you should say something to the driver or stay silent. his voice broke you out of your thoughts.Â
âsorry, i didnt mean to scare you.â he chuckled softly and his eyes creased, easing your nerves a little. the hint of his accent poked through his words, it was very attractive you had to admit.Â
âno , no its okay, can i help you with anything?â your voice came out harder than you imagined and more agitated than you felt. his expression hardened again and his smile fell, he shook his head.Â
âsorry, i just thought i forgot my phone.â
you stood there and looked about the room. you felt the atmosphere in the room change and as you looked at him more closely you could see the outline of his phone in his jean pocket. he didn't know you had noticed, and you were confused as to why he was really here. not wanting to drag on this interaction longer than needed you quickly picked up your bag and began to walk toward the door.Â
âI hope you find it.â you mumbled out.Â
suddenly his body was blocking the doorway and you stopped a few feet away from him. your face burning red and confused about his behaviour. âyou are not going to help me look?â he smiled and a sneakily glint in his eye made your heart skip a beat. was he flirting with you? you were very up to date with the gossip and knew he had a suspected girlfriend so his behaviour was even more shocking to you.Â
âoh sorry.â you mumbled dumbly, not knowing what to say. you knew he had his phone and you weren't about to embarrass yourself by crawling all over the floor looking for it.Â
âi've got to edit this interview i'm afraid, so if you wouldn't mind letting me pass.â you looked down at the ground as you spoke and mentally cursed yourself at the fact that your voice came out much weaker than you intended.Â
âokay.â you could hear the smile in his voice, âi apologise ma douce.â my sweet. you didn't know what he had just called you but the french nickname paired with his voice made your heart sway and even more blush burned on your cheeks. he moved from the doorway with a charming smile and allowed you to pass through.Â
your feet felt like jelly underneath you but somehow you carried yourself through the paddock back to your work area, a smile gracing your pretty features at what had just happened. but you couldn't allow anything to happen and you knew that, he had a girlfriend and it was your job to interview him. this is so wrong you told yourself. sliding a hand over your face to try to compose yourself, you began to start editing the interview.Â
you paused in shock, watching over the footage you saw how charles gaze almost never left you throughout the whole interview. he was starting at you like an animal and you didn't know why. shock graced your features even more to see how he clearly was checking you out and when you spoke to carlos, his eyes even darkened in a overprotective manner. who was he to get so possessive over you? you had just met? anger started to replace the feelings of shock and you wanted to storm back into ferrari to give him a piece of your mindâŚÂ
ââââ âś âŰŞ ď˝ĄË â§
pt2?
#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc fluff#formula 1#formula 1 imagine#formula one fanfiction#formula 1 x reader#fluff#angst#light angst#x reader#enemies to lovers#forbidden love#forbidden romance
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Guardian of the Library | Yandere Raiden Tameemon
Yandere Pantheon College AU (5/7) | Master List
The thing about being the librarian at The Pantheon College meant you had the beautifully neutral position as a keeper of the collegeâs extensive library. So while you spent your working days reading what you liked while occasionally checking books and movies out to students, things were peaceful. Now on the off chance the different groups of students decide that the library was the place to fight you had the luxury of calling security and apparently, the mere mention of the job had people running. So you were pleased to rely on this mysterious person to scare the naughty kids away. That is until he came to you.Â
The beast of a man easily collided and broke the wall of the raised entryway, tiredly yawning as he scanned the library. His brown eyes slowly take in your slice of heaven until landing on you. From there it was history.
You were nose-deep in a fantasy novel, the world you were reading about was on the cusp of war the romance finally reaching its peak. It was miraculous that you noticed him when you did. Standing so monstrously tall he somehow blocked out the light from the decadent chandelier that adorned the ceiling above your desk.Â
âCan I help you sir?â
âSo you like books huh?â
The smile on his face was far too wide and the muscles squeezing at the restraints of his white t-shirt told you this wasnât going to be a question about books. With a sigh, you tucked your book away and scooted closer to your desk.Â
âI do, now what was it you needed sir?â
âYour number if you donât mind!â
You couldnât believe this was happening. Rolling your eyes you prepare to reach for the line-connected phone, setting your hand beside it in a silent threat.Â
âLook kid Iâm far too old for you and if you think harassing the staff is going to get you a date then youâd be sorely mistaken.â Watching his expression drop and his mouth open up, you held your finger up. âIf you arenât here to check out a book, Iâll have to call security on you sir.â
His smile returned again and he leaned on the desk, completely engulfing you in his shadow.Â
âSo feisty! That is my favorite type!â
âI mean it kid Iâm going to call!â
He laughed again and you had had enough, picking up the phone you dialed the number. The ring was audibly loud, making you hope that that would have this student running. But it didnât. He just stood there smiling.
Then there was ringing again.
But if wasnât from your phone.
And it wasnât the default ringing from before.
Instead, it was some J-Pop tune that just kept going on
Until the giant man pulled out his phone declining the call.Â
âWell guess Iâve got one of your numbers now. So whenâs your lunch?â
Great.
Just great.
âI donât leave for lunch. I eat here. So youâre better off finding someoneââ
âAwesome Iâll just come back here for my lunches then!â
You wanted to groan loudly more than ever but there were usuals already watching through the shelves. Relenting you figured itâll be less noisy to let the giant security guard come in and do as he pleased.Â
Plus having the guard dog of the school hanging around might not be so bad.
______________________________________________________________
âOi, you work here right?â
Youâd already been floating around this group for a while now. They werenât regulars and they came in already looking in one section of the library.Â
Tameemon wasnât here On account that there was some more violent activity on campus, he couldnât spend all his time pestering you. He whined about it the first time someone called you since he wasnât picking up.Â
Even if you could call him, you didnât want to be dependent on that guy.
âTell this rag that book is mine, I had it first!â
His cronies hovering around all nodded, occasionally threatening the quivering kid clutching a book in the fetal position. One of your regulars. Immediately you recognized the book he was carryingâone of his latest finds. There was no shot these rowdy hooligans had this book first.Â
âOn the account that Iâve seen him start this book earlier today. Iâm quite certain he had this book first.â
âHah!?â
âDonât you see all of us! Weâre witnesses!â
âBiased witnesses that havenât stepped foot in this library before today. Now please if you canât quietly resolve this Iâm going to have to ask you to leave.â
The whole group was getting angry, you figured this might cause problems later. Which is why it surprised you when the main aggressor grabbed you by your collar, nearly lifting you off the ground.Â
âYou wanna say that again to me, booknerd!?â
THWACK!
Itâd been a while since you punched someone, you briefly shook your hand at the burning in your knuckles. Youâd have to put ice on that later. Holding your forearms up you slipped off your shoes to finally put some of your training to use.Â
âY-you hit me!?â
âYes, and Iâll do it again if you bother me or the peace of this library.â
The whole group looked irate, some tensing up and getting ready to run. It would be six to one. Hardly a fair fight but one you didnât mind. If it was for your library youâd be willing to take however many you needed to.
âYouâre gonna pay for thisââ
Lunging at you, you were ready to take him down or at least do your best to try. That is until a dark shadow overtook you and with a sigh you let your guard down. The large hands took you by your waist, gently putting you to the side before Tameemon stood in front.Â
âI can finally go all out on you little rats!â
âWâw-wait no!â
âH-hold on man t-they swung on his first!â
âY-yeah! Itâs not our fault!â
Tameemon cracked his knuckles and tilted his head in a mock stretch.Â
âThen all the more reason to join the fight.â
Tameemon pulled some salt from his pocket throwing it up in the air, and then a sadistic smile spread across his face.
Escorting the now uncurled student away from the scene, the screams and hollering of the ones dumb enough to mess around your library bounced off its walls. Sending the students still in the library out you made a call to the janitor, telling him to swing by after the campus classes ended.
Looking at the aftermath trumped any gorey horror book you could enjoy. The remains of the students were beyond battered, some of their limbs looked as though they had imploded. Gooey oozing red chunks scattered around with bits of bone, their faces resembling a cartoonish recreation of eating something sour.
âSo did I do good?â
NaturallyTameemon was covered in blood, his shirt in tatters, and his fists drenched in blood. The blood that was on the wall, wasnât something to be proud of and neither does the blood drenching the carpet beneath his feet. But the bookshelf was cleanâŚ. meaning the books were fine.
âIf youâre talking about the books thenâŚyes, you did a good job..â
âEnough for a kiss?â
âMmmm.â
âPlleeeaaaassseee!â
âI donât know how you are going to explain the bodies to the other side.â
âItâs fine the janitorâs cool! Cool enough to let us make out in their closet.â
âMaybe if you didnât scar my regular.â
âWhat?! Come on Iâm sure he didnât see anything. Câmon, baby!â
#yandere x reader#yandere x you#lovelyyandereaddictionpoint#yanderexrea#yandere#yanderes#yandere record of ragnarok#yandere ror x reader#yandere record of ragnarok x reader#yandere shuumatsu no valkyrie#yandere ror raiden tameemon#yandere tameemon#yandere tameemon x reader#yandere snv
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February 2024 Stucky Fics
Completed
Keystrokes and Music Notes (Rated: M, Words: 32K) by goblininawig / @goblininawig
Summary: Bucky is paying Steve for help tracking down his stalker. Nothing happens until something happens: Steve falls in love.
Mr. Brick Wall & Mr. Overshare (Rated: T, Words: 7K) by LilyElk13
Summary: Based on the Tumblr post that's like "half of college professors are like 'you can know nothing about me except my name' and the other half are like 'and that's why my wife left me! anyway what's up with y'all'" and the response "There were two professors like this in my department and I was one of like 20 people who was taught by both of them so there was a very small gang of us who knew that Professor Brick Wall and Professor Overshare were married with two kids." except in this it's high school teachers instead of college :)
A Company Man (Rated: E, Words: 75K) by mambo / @whtaft
Summary: Itâs the way that Bucky smiles at Steve from across his desk. No, itâs the way that Buckyâs hand brushes Steveâs as they stand side by side in an elevator not crowded enough to justify their closeness. Or maybe itâs the whispered conversations every Saturday night, the way Bucky saves Steveâs number under a different name in his phone. No matter what it is, the truth is the same: Steve Rogers is in love with Bucky Barnes, a married man.
Rock You Like a Hurricane (Rated: E, Words: 112K) by CelticCross
Summary: Bucky Barnes is an author, he's written many books in his Winter Soldier series, starring Lloyd Hansen and Nick Fowler. He hasn't written a word worth writing in the past three months and his agent, Sam Wilson, forces him to take a break. Sam books him a rental beach house in a place called Plum Cove in Mass for three months, hoping to break him out of his writer's block. The owner, Steve Rogers, retired Plum Cove Police Captain, landlord and part time surfer is surprised to get such a lengthy off season booking but takes it anyway. He doesn't expect to spend a lot of time with the person renting his house, but then he wasn't expecting the storm to be that fierce.
Closing Time (Rated: M, Words: 10K) by RecoveringTheSatellites / @thisonesatellite & art by maichan /@maichan808
Summary: Steve works in a Brooklyn dive bar. A tall, guarded guy comes in to drink at regular intervals. He always sits in the back corner. Steve leaves him alone. He looks like a guy who deserves some peace and quiet. He does find out the stranger's name is Bucky. Finds out what he likes to drink. And little by little, conversation happens. Connection happens. Until one day a cock-flock of dudebros comes in (i made up cock-flock, but really, is that not their collective term) and the heckling goes up to eleven once theyâre good and drunk. Bucky gets asked to take it outside. Steve will have none of that, thankyouverymuch. . A tale of love and hope in unlikely places, sprinkled with a bit of PTSD, and the occasional sarcastic quip.
Use Your Agency (Rated: E, Words: 15K) by romanticalgirl
Summary: Bucky is given the assignment (punishment) of being the agent whose job it is to integrate the newly-thawed Captain America into life in a new century. Only maybe it's not so bad. Because Bucky ends up dealing with Steve Rogers, who is nothing like the Captain America in Bucky's history books. From coming out of the ice through AoU.
Stay with Me (Rated: E, Words: 79K) by maikurosaki / @allegra-dreams
Summary: When Bucky Barnes accompanies his family to a ceremony dedicated to George Barnes' activity, he expects free food and drinks, the occasional boring speech, and watching his dad blush furiously as he gets to finally meet his childhood hero. What he doesn't expect is saving Captain America's life and getting shot in the process. What follows is a slow road to recovery, eating hospital food (still disgusting), making new friends (Avengers!!! Seriously, the Avengers!) and pining over Captain America (he won't comment on that). It sounds simple, but it really isnât!
The Steadfast Soldier (Rated: E, Words: 12K) by danielosbourne
Summary: Bucky returns to Brooklyn to help his sister navigate a family crisis.
twelve twenty-five (Rated: E, Words: 43K) by burning_brighter / @burnin-brighter
Summary:Â âI have to say,â Winifred says, a mug of cocoa in her hands. âWhen you say you were bringing someone home, I thought you meant you were bringing a boyfriend. But Iâm glad you brought Steve.â âWho says Iâm not?â Bucky teases, laughing when Steve lets out an exasperated groan. âYou two finally got your respective head out of your respective ass?â asks George, looking at Steve and Bucky intently. âNo,â Steve says pointedly, âBucky just thinks heâs so funny.â - Ever since they met, everyone assumed it was just a matter of time before Steve and Bucky became a thing. Ten years later and it has yet to happen. But when Bucky invites Steve to spend the holidays with him and his family in upstate New York, things start to change.
WIP
Every Me and Every You (Rated: M, Current Words: 38K) by deadto27 / @deadto27
Summary: Bucky Barnes is doing his best. Heâs getting by after the blip, after Sam became Captain America, after SteveâŚwell, itâs best he doesnât think about that. The point is, his life is different now, and heâs trying his best. He just wishes the hollow feeling in his chest would go away.ââBucky gets blinded by a bright light as the tear seems to implode in on itself and thereâs an odd little jolt as the pulling stops, and then Buckyâs blinking, trying to get his vision right again as he loosens his grip on America.âYou okay?â he checks, still squinting. Heâs probably not blind, he thinks. It just feels like it right now.âIâm okay,â America tells him and he sees her nod shakily as his vision starts to clear, and he carefully lets go of her, seeing that she can support herself, hands pressing onto the floor next to her.âUhâŚI donât think I am,â says another voice, and Bucky turns his head so fast he might give himself whiplash. Because he knows that voice. He knows that voice better than any other voice on the planet and heâs missed that voice, so, so much.
Lost Vocabularies that Might Express (The Memory of These Broken Impressions) (Rated: E, Current Words: 103K) by dorian_burberrycanary / @burberrycanary
Summary:Â The worst of times, like the best, are always passing away. Howâs that for some consolation on the road? A post-The Falcon and The Winter Soldier Stucky fix-it as part of the all-American road trip, detours included.
#Stucky#Steve and Bucky#Steve Rogers#Bucky Barnes#fanfic#XOXOBUCKYBARNES' Stucky Fic Reading List#february reading list
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Buddy angst with happy ending.. Taylor or Gerri
Be My First
Gerri Fields x GN! Reader
Warning: Angst but a happy ending.
18+ MINORS DNI
Y/N had lost everyone they had ever loved in one fell swoop, even being took in by Kate and Danny when they were still in high school after having no other family in the state. So they had had a friend in Gerri as they recovered from the car accident. They became Gerri's test audience to her music which they loved the sound of her voice. They found it soothing and they would never get tired of hearing her sing. Pretty much soon enough falling for the girl.
Even during the last summer they had spent there, they had a job and decided to help with some of the repairs around the Field's residence even though they were afraid to step foot into their old home.
They were there for them all when Danny passed away that summer too. Although Kate tried to stop Y/N from donating anything of their earnings to help towards funeral costs, they never backed down.
But the moment they heard about the fight between Lily and Gerri and how this guy, David was the cause of Gerri's heartbreak. They went straight to him, anger coursing through their veins as they approached him on the basketball court with Lily.
"Hey!" They called out to the two. "What the fuck is wrong with you? You lead on my friend and she thinks she has a chance with you and you." They turned to Lily. "You're supposed to be her best friend and you screw her over just like that."
"It never meant to happen." Lily started as David put his hand up to stop her from talking.
"It's none of your business kid." He told them as they scoffed. "What and who I do is none of your business."
"It becomes my business when it is someone I care about." They told him with a swing of their fist, connecting with David's jaw. Before Lily coupd stop it, he tackled them to the ground and punched them as hard as he could. Y/N soon managed to get out of his hold and kneed him in the crown jewels, sending him rolling on his front as he groaned in pain.
"What the fuck!" Lily yelled as she got on her knees to comfort David.
"Gerri needs you Lily." Y/N told her softly. "Not me. She needs her best friend." With that they left the court. Lily knew they were right in Gerri needing her, especially with the loss of her father.
That was the moment Y/N decided they should move out of the Field's residence and move back home. Although they remained there for them all, but not so much more for Gerri.
But the moment she had found out what they had done, she soon made her way to their home. Banging on their door.
"Y/N! I know you're in there!" She yelled as she continued to bang on the door. Y/N groaned as they got up from the sofa, stretching as they made their way to the door to open it to an angry Gerri.
"Hello." They greeted her as she stepped inside.
"Don't hello me." She told them sternly. "Why would you interfere in my relationships? Hell, why did you beat up David?"
"Lily told you?" They questioned as Gerri chuckled dryly.
"Of course she did. She told me at my dad's funeral, which you weren't even at!" She poked their chest as they sighed.
"I was there." They told her. "I paid my respects to your family and well, you were busy with Lily and I didn't want to interrupt the two of you."
"You could have still came to me." She told them as they shook their head with a soft smile.
"You need your best friend more than you need me." They started to fix the comforter on the sofa and move the pillow to the cupboard.
"I need you too Y/N." Gerri told them as her shoulders deflated. "I guess I was too hung up on the deal I made with Lily and then the two of us fighting over David that I never realised that what I needed was right in front of me."
"What was the deal?" Y/N asked her as they moved to the kitchen.
"To lose our virginity before college." She told them as she followed them. Taking the bottle of water from their grasp.
"You shouldn't just throw that away with someone who couldn't care about your feelings." They told her with a tender gaze. "Your first time should be special. Memorable even and with someone who would do anything to make the experience as comfortable, safe and loving as it happens. Someone who loves you with every fibre of their being." Gerri listened as they spoke, the butterflies in her stomach going wild as she gazed into their eyes.
"Then be my first." She whispered as Y/N looked at her, shocked by her bold words. "I want you to be my first. Hell, you should be the one to kiss me and speak sweet nothings to me everyday. You should be the one who has me. Mind, body and soul."
"I will be your first." They told her as they stepped closer, caressing her cheek as she looked up at them. "But not right now. Not this week because I want to do this right. I want to take you out on dates. Support you at your shows. Shower you with love, affection and gifts. You deserve to be treated as such because you are amazing Gerri and I would be the luckiest person alive to have you by my side through everything."
And with that, she sealed the new chapter with a kiss, loving and passionate as she sighed at the contact. Her whole being was electrified and well aware of Y/N's hands that had now moved to her hips. Squeezing and caressing as the kiss deepened as she wrapped her arms around their neck, keeping their body as close as she could. Her mind was full with every thought that was Y/N. Her every fibre craved their touch. Her heart belonged to them and she never realised soon enough, but she was ready for a lifetime of love and safety in the arms of her person.
#gerri fields x reader#gerri fields fanfiction#gerri fields#very good girls fanfiction#elizabeth olsen x reader#elizabeth olsen imagine#elizabeth chase olsen
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Stork Visits
Pairings: Survey Coprs x Black Reader - do they want babies?
Word Count: 1137
Warnings: baby fever?
A/N: Hereâs what I think in regard to the guys wanting babies. But tell me what you think! Is there someone who you feel would react differently than I imagined?
Headcannons Masterlist
Eren - oh absolutely. I think heâd love to see a miniature him running around causing mayhem. Heâs the obsessed dad, telling everyone you meet that youâre pregnant and watching literally everything you eat to make sure that itâs safe and healthy for the baby. Eren becomes a nutritionist, a midwife, and security guard all in one; and while you are grateful, he could definitely use a chill pill.Â
Levi - I wanna say no, but he can be convinced. More of a soft no, or Leviâs idea of a soft no. He doesnât really develop relationships or connections with others because of everyone around him dying and for that reason heâs really against the idea of raising a child. But once he finds someone special, I think heâll view it with a different set of lens and even come to anticipate the idea of another Ackerman.
Erwin - very neutral. He isnât actively for a child or against it. More of a if it happens, it happens kinda fella. Understand that work WILL be a priority and will often take precedence. Erwin is absolutely taking care of his family but itâll be more in a financial sense. Although he is emotionally available as well itâs his physical presence yall will have to tussle with. However, he is making sure at the very least yall wont need for much. I'm talking a house in the best neighborhood, the best schools, the best clothes, etc. And he absolutely loves his family but when that job calls, it's toodles.Â
Connie - also neutral to the idea. Connie doesnât really take life seriously to me. I consider him to be in his playboy era lowkey. He doesnât really live for the future, but more so the present so if you get pregnant heâll be supportive of whatever choice you make. And if it does happen, heâs that overwhelming dad whoâs plastering his child on all the socials. Theyâll be in matching outfits, taking professional pictures for every milestone, and heâs stacking those presents high under the Christmas tree for the holidays. That child will have him wrapped around their finger so it's safe to say that youâll have to be the bad cop for a good chunk of their childhood cause Connie is mostly concerned with being the cool and fun parent.Â
Jean - yes!! Heâs that military man that enlists straight out of high school, meets a girl, marries her two months later, and starts a family of five. Maybe even get a pet for the sake of it. Jean strikes me as very traditional in the family sense. His children will be honor students and heâs plastering his bumper sticker with all their future colleges. Their report cards get put on the fridge and while Jean does start off his parenting a little strict in the disciplinary department, he eventually learns to take it easy.Â
Onyankopon - yes, but when the time is right. He wants to try and solve all the worlds problems before settling down to start a family. Soon enough heâll realise that as much as he wants to he cant help everyone so he goes on to focus his energy on creating a life with his lover. Onyâs so adorable. Literally there at your beck and call. Heâs taking you to all your doctors appointments, sitting through all your lamaze classes and designing the baby's room from scratch. Ony is the hands on father whoâs spending weeks tryna figure out how to assemble the crib and heâs signing the kid up for every extracurricular activity possible as soon as they can walk - ooh and heâs never missing a practice.Â
Reiner - idek with this man. I genuinely feel like the pendulum can swing either way, though I am leaning more towards no. I think Reiner carries way too much guilt to ever feel deserving of children and so heâs content to just have a wife while playing the role of cool, rich uncle. Mans is honestly just happy to be alive, and barely even that, so heâs not too interested in starting a family. Heâll babysit in a heartbeat and is sneakily feeding his nieces/nephews/godchildren ice cream for breakfast after their parents explicitly said no. Heâs the one they call when they need a ride home from a party they weren't even supposed to go to and heâs providing an alibi if need be. Reiner is sliding $20 in their hands at every function and bringing them gifts from his latest excursion around the globe. While he greatly enjoys his time spent with the kiddos he loves handing them back to their parents even more; and greatly enjoys having his lover all to himself while doing things he never dreamed heâd reach the age to see and simultaneously healing the child within.Â
Armin - yes!! I think Armin is gonna be the poster dad for kids lowkey. You ever meet those parents who run their household like the navy? Like in a scheduled sorta way? Thatâs gonna be Armin. Kids are in bed no later than 8pm. Their breakfast, lunch, and dinner will be balanced to each portion of essential nutrients based on the food groups of the plate. They're drinking 8 glasses of water a day and flavored milk yuck during snack time. Their juices are diluted with water so when they hit their first party and experience 100% juice for the first time theyâre literally bouncing off the walls. I really feel like Armin would have that perfect cookie cutter type family who celebrates and decorates for every holiday. They brush their teeth before bed every night and must bathe with their special bubble bath soap or else theyâll lose their shit. Heâll raise kids you avoid in primary school lmaoo but get cool with during high school who eventually becomes a more chill version of their younger self.Â
Floch - not really. He wants to run wild and sow his oats. Floch doesn't care for kids in my opinion. Heâs in his selfish era which turns out to last a lot longer than he anticipated. Floch is an intelligent guy and while he enjoys practicing for a baby, heâs come to realise that he wouldnât enjoy the responsibilities of said baby. Heâs not actively in his nieces/nephews/godchildren everyday lives but instead is that uncle you only see at the family functions which is like twice a year. Once heâs there though they can ask for anything and heâs giving it to them. Money, a lil sip of beer, hell even some dating tips. He doesn't go out of his way to be present so it's really one of those you just gotta be there moments. Floch has always been on his own timing and enjoys living his best child free life.Â
#Emmy Writes#Emmy Tries#Attack on Titan#AOT#shinjeki no kyojin#snk#babies anyone??#Eren Yeager#Levi Ackerman#Erwin Smith#Connie Springer#Jean Kirstein#aot Onyankopon#Reiner Braun#Armin Arlet#Floch Forster#aot x reader#aot x you#aot x black reader#black reader
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Have you got any opinions of Left 4 Dead 1/2's cast of survivors?
One thing I've been thinking about a lot lately is when a work of apocalyptic fiction treats the end of the world as a site for personal reinvention. On the one hand it's potent theming, because the questions of how you choose to behave when utterly freed from existing societal constraints, and how you reconstruct your sense of identity after total context collapse, are sort of inherently packaged in with the premise. On the other hand you're kind of playing with fire, because if you treat the apocalypse as something primarily liberatory or empowering for the protagonists I personally often find it offputting. Congratulations! Your personal growth was purchased at the low low price of the death of billions! You can get away with that kind of thing if you take it in a lighter direction and maintain, like, a deliberately mock-misanthropic tone, or play up the inherent comedy of a person whose life sucks so much that the apocalypse represents a step up- but it's a knifes-edge to walk. I've found that a satisfying synthesis is examine that act of personal reinvention as a coping mechanism, a story that the person doing it is telling about themselves in order to deal with the horror of their surroundings. Zone One by Coulson Whitehead and Rot and Ruin by Jonathan Maberry are pieces of zombie fiction that I think use this lens in an interesting way. I believe that Left 4 Dead is close-to-unique among Valve properties in that they actually released a close-to-standalone self-contained narrative starring game's the principal cast, in the form of The Sacrifice*, and I feel like the comic explored this dynamic in interesting ways, because the four survivors exist on a distribution between "Apocalypse-as-New-Lease-On-Life" and "Turbofucked," in ways that pointedly affect their behavior and outlook.
Louis, the eternal optimist, Certified Gamer, still clad in white-collar garb two weeks into the apocalypse, is revealed to have been the one of the four who had the most going for him before the outbreak, a middle-class job with a well-defined upwards trajectory. His dogged insistence that things will eventually be okay is implicitly informed by how badly his life got upended by all his coworkers going nuts and trying to eat him. On the flip side, though, the comic portrays him as having had the fewest actual interpersonal connections- the only person he interacts with in his flashback is his coworker Ray, and that interaction is defined by how Ray is nowhere near ride-or-die enough for Louis to risk coming into the office at his request. He barely registers that the guy in the bathroom who attacks him is a zombie. Make of this what you will.
Zoey was a step down on the ratchet-she was floundering, but it was a comfortable flounder that's likely familiar to a lot of us. Struggling in college, no direction in life, a would-be creative struggling to turn her interest in fiction into an actual career. Parents separated and at each other's throats- but she had parents, had support, had options even as she was treading water. The apocalypse is superficially her call to adventure, letting her live out the fiction she immersed herself in before the outbreak, and you see glimmers of bravado stemming from that- but that same genre immersion is directly tied to her decision to put down her father before his immunity was apparent, because they thought that they were living out a trope that they aren't. She embodies the gap between the nerdy apocalypse fantasy and the horror of actually living through that.
On the other end of things you have Francis, who's downright gleefully cynical about the apocalypse- marrying the assertation that they're all going to die, and that nothing will ever be okay again, with the claim that the apocalypse as the best thing that ever happened to him. Before the outbreak Francis had a strong social circle but was also slated for prison; the apocalypse eliminated the immediate threat of jail, but his pre-outbreak social circle very pointedly isn't around anymore, in a way he's kind of talking circles around when he brings it up with Zoey; he mainly brings them up in the context of contrasting them with how competent Bill is at navigating the apocalypse, and you can infer that his initial attempt to treat the end of the world like an opportunity for a party didn't turn out so hot. He very badly wants to be the guy who had nothing to lose, the guy who's having a blast, he wants to inhabit that role, but there's an undercurrent of performativity there.
Then you get to Bill, who genuinely had nothing, in a way that inform his post-outbreak behavior in really interesting ways. He had no friends, no family, no purpose, and he wasn't in particularly good health. The apocalypse is, in many ways, straightforwardly a step up from his previous situation, in ways that isn't true of any of the others- now he has friends, a goal, a reason to keep moving. The Sacrifice is interested in how that affects his decision making, for better or for worse- he's myopic, invested in the well-being of an extremely tight in-group at the expense of others, monomaniacally good at fighting the infected in a way that even the other survivors find somewhat unnerving. There's a sense in which the brave new world is Bill-shaped. Admittedly the brave new world killed him dead. But it killed him dead in a significantly more badass way than he otherwise would have died, and on some level that was probably his preference. (I don't really go to Dead By Daylight, but I'm tickled pink by their implication that getting to do asymmetric survival horror multiplayer forever is sort of like a Valhalla situation for him.)
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renjun: soulmates
Word count: 1.3k
Warnings: confusing emotions, y/n almost gets into a car accident, quite a bit of crying
Notes: this is Renjun's part of 'nct dream as love tropes', enjoy!
They say soulmates are highly connected on a spiritual level. You never understood what that meant entirely but you see a glimpse of it through your parents. They seem to understand each other without even having to tell each other anything. A simple glance, a smile, itâs like they really are the other half of each other. When your mum feels sad, you dad feels it before she says anything. Your dad told you when you were little, that soulmates can feel each otherâs emotions. It keeps them in sync, connected. Some connections are stronger than others, it varies between every pair of soulmates. He says thatâs why sometimes, you suddenly feel happy or sad even if youâre not currently feeling those exact emotions.Â
But not all soulmates end up having a romantic relationship, some soulmates remain best friends. Some never really get to have a relationship. Some soulmates never get to find each other at all. Youâre in college now and you have yet to find your soulmate. Not that it matters to you, you werenât too invested into this whole soulmate thing like some of your friends.Â
However, you quickly learned that your soulmate gets frustrated rather easily. Youâd be fine, going about your day when you feel rage begin to bubble at the pit of your stomach. Sometimes, it gets so strong you want to scream at anyone who dares to get in your way. Then it fades away almost as quickly.
Renjun is rather annoyed with his soulmate (spoiler: thatâs you). Because why is she always crying? This has happened ever since he was young. He was having lunch with his parents one day and he had the sudden urge to start bawling for no reason. But after a while, he stopped as if nothing even happened and continued eating. As he grew older, he got better at controlling your emotions. Whenever he feels that sinking feeling in his chest, he excuses himself to the bathroom to just let it out. But sometimes it catches him so off-guard and his friends were so amazed by it.Â
Him and his friends were out and having a good time over drinks and Renjun felt that same feeling where his heart sank and his eyes were immediately filled with tears. âAh shit, sheâs at it again,â he mutters as a single tear falls from his eyes. âDude, are you alright?â âYea, my soulmateâs just really upset over something again. It happensâŚâ Renjun gives himself a moment for you to be done crying, holding a napkin to dry his tears as they continuously roll down his cheek. âShe seems really upsetâŚâ âSheâs been crying a lot lately, if Iâm being honest.â âWhy donât you check up on her?â âOh⌠I- uh⌠I havenât met her yet.â âOh, what? And you guys are already this connected? Thatâs crazy.â âItâs a little embarrassing⌠I just cry out of nowhere all the time.â But Renjun does worry about you a little. The last time he cried this much was when he was a lot younger, so he wonders if youâre holding up alright. Sometimes, he feels sorry that he canât comfort you.Â
They say youâll know your soulmate when you ever come into contact with them. Some of your friends said they knew at a single glance. Others said it was when they spoke to each other for the first time. The word âcontactâ seems to come in many forms.Â
Youâve been really stressed lately because of finals. And also because your manager from your part-time job is a pain in the ass. Sheâs making you work over hours and not paying you for them. Moreover, youâre doing a lot more than what you initially applied for. Youâre finally closing the cafe for the day and youâve never been more relieved. It was one of the most tiring shifts of your life. You donât know if itâs because itâs midweek, you had to serve so many grumpy customers today. Everyone was so impatient, some guy even shouted at you to hurry up when you were swarmed with drink orders during peak hour. Towards the end of the shift, you were careless while taking someoneâs pie out of the over and burnt your hand.Â
The worse thing is, you canât even sleep when you get home because you have a paper due in two days and you barely started it. Thinking about having to sit down to write an essay after one of the worst shifts of your life already has you close to tears. Youâre so tired and the semester break still seems so far away.Â
Similar to you, Renjun is finally leaving the library after working on his essay all day. His eyes feel like theyâre about to pop out and his head is pounding. Before heading home though, he decides to drop by the convenient store to grab a couple cans of energy drinks since he ran out. As heâs paying, Renjun feels a familiar ache in his chest and he reckon itâs caused by you again. Recently, chest pains are perfectly normal occurrence to him.Â
As he walks out of the convenient store, bidding the cashier goodbye, he slowly walks to the pedestrian crossing to begin walking home. The green man just turned red so he stops before the yellow line, waiting for it to turn green again. Renjunâs chest begins to hurt a little more and he can already feel tears starting to well up in his eyes. Just then, a young lady about his age walk past him and doesnât stop walking.Â
Youâre walking home from the cafe and all you can think about is the miserable day you had, how tired you are and how much more you had to do. Youâre about to cross the road when a hand grabs onto your arm and pulls you back. All you hear was a loud, âWatch out!â and the loud honking from the car that zoomed past just a few feet away from you. âShit, what are you doing? You could have died!â Youâre too shocked from what happened when you finally realise what just happened.Â
You look to the boy beside who is still holding onto you tightly, he has tears rolling down his cheeks and you feel that boiling in your chest you know all too well. The two of you stare at each other and it clicks. Images of each other flashes in both your minds almost like youâve known each other your whole life. He slowly lets go of your arm and the beeping from the traffic light alerts you two that the red man has turned green and it is safe to cross the road.Â
âSo youâre the reason Iâm always crying for no reasonâŚâ Renjun starts as he wipes his tears and you chuckle almost sadly, âIâm sorryâŚâ He laughs too, this is a little awkward. No one really ever teaches you what to do when you first meet your soulmate. âA-are you okay though?â Renjun asks as he calms down, looking at you with concern in his eyes. âNot really but⌠Iâll survive.â You reply, giving him a liptight grin. âWhy are you always so frustrated?â You ask and itâs his turn to feel a little embarrassed. âMy bad, Iâm not the best at staying calmâŚâ Itâs silent again when the two of you finally reach the other side of the road.
âIâm Renjun, by the way.â âIâm y/n.â âPlease be careful when youâre crossing the roadâŚâ âRight, thank you for saving my life⌠drinks on me someday⌠I work at the cafe just down the street.â You tell him as you point towards the direction of the cafe. Renjun nods with the prettiest smile on his face and you already feel yourself blushing. âIâll come by after my classes tomorrow, will you be there?â âYea, Iâll be there.â With that you two part ways, youâve never been more excited for work and Renjun has never been more thrilled to attend his classes. An unfamiliar feeling erupts in both your chests, itâs a warm, fluttering feeling. As you two walk home, you both canât help the smile that finds it way to your faces.
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hello unfortunately i thought even more about sol + swag as an analogy for being asian and it is . making me unwell. i am putting it under the cut for the main reason that it is stupid beyond belief
OK. so. hear me out .
STUPID REASONS WHY SOL IS ASIAN:
(and hint: this is all me projecting 100%)
1) moist frog who immediately turns off when it gets too cold. SOUTHEASTASIAN BOY AS FUCK (to me). guy who thinks thirty degrees celsius is pleasant temperature. guy who thinks that anything below 25C is sweater weather. guy who is soo sweaty and moist all the time (the humidity) and that is not only a natural state, but a preferrable state. 20 degrees is too cold. anything below 0 is actually not functional.
anyway. sol bufo. keepin it warm and gross. if its too cold and dry he immediately hibernates. king
2) idk if anyone reading this has seen shaolin soccer. but sol bufo. could clump shaolin soccer. essentially what im saying is sol bufo is like a buff asian jock. which is kinda goofy and goodnatured and loud and also very obnoxious. i cannot articulate this very well. but. what can i say except a human version of sol bufo was delivered to me in a dream and it was every buff chinese classmate ive ever met.
3) (you will notice the reasons get progressively more stupid and more deeply specific)
sol bufo would love milo. omg. like. chocolate drink in a juice box container that is branded as a sports/energy drink and also green. also the guy on the front of the packet milo. sol bufo coded. tbh
anyway. milo isnt strictly southeast asian..? but. yes it is actually.
4) the whole monk class is extremely steeped in asian 'aesthetics' anyway. i mean. ki. so whatever i can claim this monk for me thats my right
NONSTUPID BUT STILL KIND OF SILLY REASONS:
and this is also me projecting 100%. obviously all delusion. so i guess see this as a for-fun reading of the sol/swag storyline through the lens of a very specific of asianness
okay so. swag right. his journey is about leaving his home where he was comfortable and safe but also very confined. mothership lures him to ezry w the promise of opportunity & seeing the world, making something of himself. he ends up being exploited for his body and skills. and he runs away, but his blood still oils up the mothership cogs.
so anyway. i think its pretty clear how that cld map onto like . an immigrant experience? leaving home because of the need to find urself, but simultaneously, the threat of exploitation at the hands of ppl who see you as a potential profit to be mined. this is the first part
the part that is more crazy to me is his experience in irondeep. like, when he left moonstone he left his entire community. now hes alone ... and he cant go back. (he is stranded physically, emotionally). and at this low point, of true and utter loneliness and purposelessness, comes along bronzebeard industries. they offer him a job - but more importantly, they offer him connections.
like. thinking about how were introduced to swag. its not at his job, its his downtime, its when hes hanging out with his coworkers, when hes surrounded by 'friends'. w people who think hes cool, and the people who think hes a "sucker".
idk! but i think this also relates rlly strongly to a common experience of being international? like. when you know you are permenantly lost from home. what you want more than anything is to feel the same community and sense of belonging you used to have. and it is very easy for that desire to ge manipulated. (like - im just gonna mention the one specific instance that ive seen. which is like. international students on college campuses getting targeted a lot by christian groups. because they know those people are lonely and want a feeling of shared tradition and practice. anyway. this is one specific example but also this is literally what happens to lyddie and sister rosaline :-| )
anyway so in summary: swags story of hope/idealism, exploitation, and loneliness leading him to be a very good pawn. i think that is something that could potentially be read as the experiences of ppl dislocated internationally from their home. and im saying its asian because I Want To.
... and sol! okay. i think very simply: sol is super white-washed. total banana. and thats part of his character. he is a moonstone bullywug who never knew his own home, and still, has never even seen moonstone with his own eyes. he does not know his own history. (and kinda tangent, the place where he spends the majority of his life is in launchpad, a sanitized corporate version of reality. and i mean, the whole 'boy wizard and frog pal' is very clearly alluding to harry potter. like. its white.) but ignoring that, the essence of his character is like. this is a guy who does not know where he came from
and currently? a large part of his arc is about trying to unravel his identity by figuring out where (who) he came from. swag daniels is his one link to a community hes just now found out he has. that is a part of why hes trying so hard to save swag. swag is his family - specifically the parts about family you cant choose. that is hard, complicated and how you understand where the parts of yourself track back to.
like. i think a lot about how the pivotal moments of connection between swag and sol are all about swag... showing sol what moonstone is like. in a dream, he lets sol experience what that place is like. that place is a muggy swamp. idk. swag is taking sol back home. that fucks me up a lot
... anyway digression aside. i think one of the most painful things gg on rn w sols arc rn is. how its looking right now. sol is going to lose swag. sol is going to have to come to terms w losing swag. sol for the first time, yearns to know who he is and who he came from. but by the time he went looking it was too late. his time is up. that moment of connection was brief and gone. there are so many questions about their history that sol will never know now
so obviously this kind of dips a bit into metaphor at the end. swag represents connection to cultural history and heritage and identity. and in that lens, it reads to ME as a story abt being asian and disconnected from ur roots. but anyway. even without that lens i think sols story is still v much abt cultural estrangement
(i also have a very loose and unformed thought: which is that sols journey from wanting to stand out/be special to wanting to find a place of belonging. is ALSO INCREDIBLY RESONANT to the experience of being whitewashed asian... ESPECIALLY for ppl who do come from asia. and how that also relates to the tragedy of wanting to understand ur roots when its already too late. but . i dont rlly know if that is a common experience so. itll be noodling in my head for now)
anyway. my essay. and yes this is all make believe in my head . TLDR: i think swags an immigrant sols a banana and i am fucking insane thanks everyone
also if u read this all and want to know what part of this long ramble actly answers the question of why i think theyre asian. well. you know what.
#ramble tag#im NOT tagging this . LOL.#if u read this that was an ACTIVE CHOICE ON UR PART and i am NOT LIABLE#also anyone who doesnt know: banana = asian on the outside white on the inside#so.... MEEEEE đ¸đ¸đ¸đ¸đ¸đşđšđšđšđˇđ#fml this is 1k + words. LORD. okay.... im SILLYY.. man i have actual work to do tonight#anyway. i hope u guys understand why im normal abt sol
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You guys, I feel like Iâm drowning. These past three weeks have felt unmanageable to me. Like, I donât know how to keep going.
Iâm walking alongside (trying the best I know how) the older girls as one navigates this break up and the other tries to transition to college. We got DD a car, but it still needs a few repairs. She was here all afternoon today working on it with DH.
I am waiting for the updated version of Ms. 6âs IEP to hit my inbox to send it off to the school. I am also working on her housing contract. Then I think I can step back for a few weeks. Still trying to figure out whatâs going on with graduation. Her mom is back to letting her go to it and maybe allow her to stay for dinner, but itâs Memorial Day weekend and I donât want to put a deposit down for a dinner somewhere only to have her not be allowed to attend at the last minute. I also donât want to disappoint her. Iâm unsure of how to proceed, so Iâm just sort of frozen.
DS takes his civics test next week. You have to pass in order to graduate high school. He has prepared and seems like he will do well. Heâs also pole vaulting and doing well at that for being a novice and having very little practice time due to the crummy weather weâve been having.
Work is a lot right now. Itâs to be expected due to the time of year. I can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel, but itâs a lot to slog through.
DH was verbally offered a job this week as a special education teacher. He is supposed to return to school to get his teaching certification in about a week, and is waiting for a letter of intent via email from the potential employer. Itâs a lot. We are trying to manage the financial aid piece and we are up against a super tight deadline right now. His interview for the job was virtual, so heâs heading to the school next week to actually tour it and meet his potential coworkers. In the spirit of living in a small town, one of the women he used to live who was in live with him (for real)âthe housing situation was work relatedâworks at the school. She has legit not spoken to myself or DH since he and I got engaged so that seems like it will be super awkward (although she is also married now and has kids).
DH is finally seeing a decent therapist and between the therapist and neuropsych eval he had done during fall, it is apparent he is super depressed. Depressed is apparently his baseline and super depressed happens quite a bit. It is helpful to have it identified, but wow, it is a lot to live with. I am really struggling as his wife because he cannot do much and is not really emotionally available 90% of the time. Heâs so inwardly focused, that he cannot focus on me, the kids, relationships, stuff that needs to be done, etc. Iâm drowning and he cannot take on any of the workload. It sucks.
My endocrin had me take b12 supplements the last three months and my level actually decreased. Iâm starting up with b12 injections next week. My TSH is also super, super low which means Iâm hyperhyroid and should be losing weight, but Iâm gaining which also sucks.
My endocrin is out of network for me which means my injections will be out of network. I have ZERO out of network benefits. The whole healthcare system is atrocious. I refuse to go back to the three endocrins I saw before I connected with my current one. They were all terrible, but in network. I need a super expensive full body scan but I for sure cannot pay for that out of pocket, so Iâm waiting to see if my GP will prescribe it when I see him in June.
My crown also broke this week and when the dentist looked at it, I had worn a hole clear through the middle. He said it was due to grinding/stress. I wear a mouth guard religiously at night, so itâs happening during the day. :-/ Cue more medical bills. They glued my current one back on and canât get me in to work on repair until June. I almost cried when trying to schedule with them because I just cannot even do all of this any more. (It also hurt wicked bad last time they fixed it so Iâm somewhat terrified to return.)
Thatâs my list of complaints/brain dump. Thereâs more, but I need to wrap up some grading and get dinner going. I miss a life that was easier and less complicated.
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Mature Rated Fics Masterlist (24)
Part 1Â /Â Part 2Â /Â Part 3Â /Â Part 4Â /Â Part 5Â /Â Part 6Â /Â Part 7Â /Â Part 8Â /Â Part 9 /Â Part 10Â /Â Part 11Â /Â Part 12Â /Â Part 13Â /Â Part 14Â /Â Part 15Â /Â Part 16Â /Â Part 17Â /Â Part 18Â /Â Part 19Â /Â Part 20Â /Â Part 21Â /Â Part 22Â / Part 23 /
Created: January 6th, 2024
Last Checked:------
Acceptable Payment: A Date With Katniss Everdeen-rEckLeSsLy.cOnFIneD (ff.net) Summary: "That Katniss was currently aware of, she needed to do two things: First, she needed to inform Johanna about everything that was Peeta Mellark. Second, she needed her help to make sure that she was most beautiful version of herself she had ever been for this New Year's Party." [Modern AU. Everlark.]
Curious Kat-MissprissHG (ff.net) Summary: While on the Victory Tour, Katniss suddenly becomes very curious and Peeta is the only one who she feels safe enough to ask. Will he answer her questions? Will he show her what she wants? Find out how Katniss explores her newfound sexuality with Peeta.
Mind Games-Samh1212 (ff.net) Summary: Katniss is a freshman in college. She picked a school hundreds of miles away from home hoping to avoid any and all connections to her past. Suddenly, she's paired with Peeta Mellark, a guy from her hometown, to do a somewhat unconventional project for her human sexuality class. Modern Day AU
i've been on fire, dreaming of you-orangecranscones (ao3) Summary: "I have plenty of fire myself. What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again." Katniss and Peeta try to heal after the revolution. And they (mainly Katniss) finally learn how to love each other.
Secrets I Have Held in My Heart-flythroughflames (ff.net) Summary: I was cold to him, nasty even. I acted like there was nothing I wanted to do less than spend time with him. But every night, I would fantasize about him.
Sneak Attack-burkygirl (ao3) Summary: A surprise during Peeta's walk home from the bakery could change everything. A little winter Everlark interlude post-Victory Tour.
The Night Belongs to Lovers-burkygirl (ao3) Summary: Katniss finds it easier to be honest about her feelings for Peeta at night when no one else can see. Everlark growing back together in three scenes inspired by Because the Night Belongs to Lovers, co-written by Patti Smith and Bruce Springsteen. Trigger warnings for language, allusions to torture and sexual content.
Twelve-HGRomance (ff.net) or on (ao3) Summary: She has loved him since the day he tossed her that bread. And she thinks that she'll never win his heart. Because all he's ever done is pretend for the crowdâŚbut what if one real moment could change that? One-shot. Canon Divergence. The Victory Tour in role reversal.
Under My Skin-Court81981 (ff.net) Summary: One-shot. Katniss takes a temporary job as a nude model, intending to get through the month and collect a paycheck. She doesn't expect the blond-haired, blue-eyed art student in the front row to affect her so quickly, nor does she anticipate falling in love when he needs her help for a private project.
You Put Your Arms Around Me and I'm Home-mrsbonniemellark (ao3) Summary: What would happen if Peeta hadn't been hijacked and Katniss and Peeta were allowed a private reunion?
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