#like the necessity of communication or boundary setting

[aro-culture-is]

Aro culture is wanting to scream at your friend to just dump their hateful racist asshole boyfriend, while at the same time knowing that they won't listen to you because they are in love and apparently, that erases their ability for critical thinking

While also not saying any of that because it would be rude

A "hateful racist asshole boyfriend" sounds ripe for a situation in which your friend could be dating someone actively grooming them for domestic abuse.

In those cases, individuals often already have poor boundary control, and it's not the critical thinking actually missing: it's the security that creating boundaries doesn't mean losing someone who they feel cares about them. Judgements on their ability to "think clearly" are both misplaced and encouraged by the abusers, as worsening self esteem leads to an abuse victim seeking comfort... often from the abuser.

I think it's very, very important to recognize that the best thing you can do for them is to be there, continually reaffirm that they can always tell you anything, and rather than pressure them to break up... ask them to tell you about the relationship. You can guide them to red flags, but also try to present possible communication elements. There are guides online by great resources talking about how to best support these conversations.

And, of course, it's always possible it is simply that your friend actually is racist and they put up with the behavior because of that. It's not hard for some bigots to find an in through less overt bigotry. But I strongly encourage folks to realize that "in love with no capacity for critical thought" is a very dangerous warning sign that someone may be unable to recognize healthy boundaries, and worse - to recognize unhealthy boundaries.

[4liyahmajidah]

I can’t stay silent about this anymore.

It’s already bad enough that I’ve waited this long to speak on it — but the way the queer community treats touch-me-nots is absolutely out of line.

What happened to basic respect? Respect for someone’s preferences, their body, their boundaries? Just human decency?

Instead, people drag touch-me-nots like they’re less than. Like they don’t deserve love, intimacy, or healthy relationships — and for what?

Some of my friends identify that way, and let me be real: nine times out of ten, when I hear their stories, it’s rooted in trauma. Sexual assault. Repeated boundary violations. Or simply being pushed into roles because the hypersexualization of masculine lesbians is on a whole other level. It’s dehumanizing.

And somehow, people think that makes them the problem?No. The only weird person in this equation is the one who has a problem with someone else’s boundaries.

You don’t need to have sex with someone to experience love, intimacy, or connection in a deep, ongoing relationship. It’s not a necessity — that’s a myth. But the current climate of queer relationships? It’s bleak right now, to say the least. The dating pool got pee and Dookie floating in it. No lie.

And let’s not forget: we are human beings with choices.

So if someone identifies as a touch-me-not — how the hell does that affect you? In any way, shape, or form?

Let’s revert to default settings and just mind our business.

Capeesh?

[cy-cyborg]

We have communities - Writing disability quick tips

So often, stories centred on disabled characters, especially in modern settings, emphasise how lonely or isolated the character is because of their disability, especially if it’s a newly acquired disability or one that non-disabled people assume would have a big impact on our ability to do “fun stuff”. This will often be accompanied by statements of “no-one understands what living with [insert disability here]” is like!

And while isolation and loneliness are things a lot of disabled people deal with, a lot of us are not completely alone either, especially in the modern day.

Just like any group of people with shared experiences, we find one another. Sometimes this is through formal systems; some spinal rehabilitation centres for example, will pair newly paralysed people up with a mentor who’s had a similar form of paralysis for much longer to help guide the person while the adjust to their new disability. Other more formal systems can look like disability sporting organisations - the one I used to work for used to specifically encourage very newly disabled people to join so they didn’t feel like the had to learn everything about their disability alone, or support groups.

Other times though, these communities are much less formal. They may look like online forums, such as the ones on Reddit, built by and for disabled people to talk about their experiences and seek recommendations from others in the same boat, or parts of larger social media sites. For example, on Tumblr, there aren’t really any formal groups, but thanks to the hashtags we use in our posts, we often find one another fairly quickly there. We sometimes also carve out our own little subsections of fandom or hobby spaces, brought together by the shared interest itself, how things like disability might impact the way you interpret or interact with it, and how we can modify it (in the case of hobbies) to make it work for us.

A lot of disability communities, formal or otherwise, also form out of necessity, such as advocacy groups run by and for disabled people, and those built around ensuring the rights of disabled people are protected.

Isolation and loneliness are problems within the disabled community that many of us deal with, but this tends to be more in the context of isolation from the wider public, exclusion from public spaces and events (despite there being laws that are supposed to stop this because they’re often not enforced), disconnect from non-disabled friends and family, etc, most of which are the result of systematic issues or the lack of understanding or care and support from non-disabled people in our lives. Not always, but often.

The communities made by and for disabled people though are often (at least in part) made to help make up for this, and they’re more common than you might think, you just have to know where to look. It would be nice to see more creators reflecting this in their work a bit more often, or at least acknowledging that they are there, even if your character chooses not to engage with them.

However, as a reminder to authors and creatives: These communities, especially the online ones, are for disabled people, they are not there for you to use as a reference as a creator. Some communities are ok with you being there to learn, so long as you listen and don’t try to speak over/bombard their members with questions. Others are not. The ones that are, typically will have something written somewhere if it’s online (e.g. subreddits that accept writers wanting to write disabled characters will often have it written in the “about” section or the rules). There are also dedicated groups and platforms for non-disabled people seeking to learn more about us and our communities, which can be excellent resources for creatives like writers. Just remember to be mindful of where you are and respectful of people’s spaces and boundaries when doing your research.

[breelandwalker]

Wolf Moon - January 24-25, 2024

Shake off the cold and sing to the sky, witches - it's time for the Wolf Moon!

Wolf Moon

The Wolf Moon is the name given to the full moon which occurs in the month of January. The name is said to be derived from the sound of wolves howling with hunger while prey is scarce in the midst of winter. Given that we now know that wolves howl mostly for communication, my personal opinion is that people huddled in their homes during a very dark and dangerous time of year probably noticed these sounds a lot more readily with little else to occupy their time as they waited out the winter, and thus were set to worrying about ravenous beasts invading their villages and farmsteads. (It's worth noting that wolves preying on livestock was a very real concern for most people outside major cities for many centuries, so this isn't entirely unfounded.)

The name also calls to mind the howling of the wind during winter storms, or whistling around the eaves during the long cold nights. And for those of us who might not have been careful with our spending over the holidays, I might cite a tongue-in-cheek reference to the wolves being at the door when those credit card bills come due.

[For those not familiar with the phrase, to have "a wolf at the door" is a saying that refers to some imminent hardship or disaster. In modern parlance, this is usually applied to poor finances or looming bankruptcy.]

This month, the moon peaks at 12:54pm EST on January 25th, so the moon will likely appear to be full on the nights of the 24th and 25th, depending on where you are in the world.

Some North American indigenous names for the month of January and its' moon are Cold Moon (Cree), Center Moon (Assiniboine), Severe Moon (Dakota), Ice Moon (Catawba), and Spirit Moon (Ojibwe). Other names include Mantis Moon (South African origins), Quiet Moon (Celtic), and Moon After Yule (Anglo-Saxon).

What Does It Mean For Witches?

As a new year dawns, it's time for rest and reflection before we set out on the next phase of our journey. While the cold weather lingers, take some time to sit by the fire, literally or metaphorically, and take stock of where you stand, what resources are available, and what you plan to do with them.

Check in with your near-and-dear following the mad rush of the holiday season as well. Make sure that friends, family, and community members around you are doing all right. Offer support and kindness where you can, but don't overextend yourself. It's your time to recuperate too, and it is good and healthy to set boundaries which allow time and space for yourself.

What Witchy Things Can We Do?

Winter is a prime time for storytelling. Back in the days before internet or television or radio, people would often read to each other or tell tales to pass the time. Consider re-reading a favorite book that inspires you or exploring some region of folklore or mythology you've been meaning to look into. If you have children who are of an age to enjoy stories, read them some of your favorites or introduce them to something new. Share stories and discussions with your witchy circle too!

While you're at it, take a moment to examine the role that folklore and stories play in your practice. If you subscribe to a particular mythos, be it through deities or just general belief, consider which parts of it resonate the most with you and why.

Consider also the lessons of the winter season - the necessity of rest between periods of growth and activity, and the role of death, cold, and darkness in the natural cycles of life. What do these things mean to you and your practice? Are they a source of fear or fascination? Do you come alive in the winter or bundle up and wait for spring? How can you best remind yourself to pause for breath as the year goes on?

And of course, the beginning of a new year is an excellent time for goal-setting and divination. You're making resolutions for your mundane life, so make a few for your craft while you're at it, and pull out your cards or runes or pendulum for a New Year forecast on how things might go.

Happy Wolf Moon, witches! 🐺🌕

SOURCES & FURTHER READING:

Bree's Lunar Calendar Series

Bree's Secular Celebrations Series

Wolf Moon: Full Moon in January, The Old Farmer's Almanac.

Full Moon January 2024: Discover the Wolf's Thrilling Spiritual Meaning, The Peculiar Brunette.

Moon Info - Full Moon Dates for 2024

Calendar-12 - 2024 Moon Phases

Image Source: What Is A Wolf Moon?, The Fact Site.

[tsukikonikushimi]

Page 48 - Exploring the Depths

MASTERLIST

Chapter 4 - EXPLORING THE DEPTHS

ZAUN HAS A WAY OF HIJACKING THE STURDIEST NARRATIVES AND drawing focus to itself. The undercity has a messy glory all of its own. This is a place that welcomes outcasts, a refuge for those who don't have a home. Sure, there are dangers, but there is also community, creativity, and the thrilling sense that anything is possible.

Pushing the boundaries of conventions is part of Zaun's DNA, which makes the city and its denizens almost avant-garde in their tastes, behavior, and outlook. Whereas Piltover follows codes and hierarchies, Zaun explodes them. This does not make one city better than the other — they complement each other.

The similarly Manichean notion that the cities have drastically different levels of wealth and legality does not reflect the complicated reality. "The city from below is rich with diversity, and some people do have money," Julien Georgel said. "And Zaun is not completely lawless, though there are issues with the mob, drugs, etc." This complexity is represented in the physical layout as well: Zaun reaches deep, then deeper. "There are different layers in Zaun, including the old abandoned mines where Vi and Jinx come from,” Georgel pointed out.

As usual with Arcane, people and things are more complicated than they might appear, and keeping track of all the complexities—and, yes, layers-entailed sharing specifications and fundamental principles so that everybody could work in unison. You can see this thought process in a set of guidelines distributed to the various creative teams that banded together to create and maintain a coherent world. For Zaun for instance, "everything is designed to withstand extreme pressure and potential explosions"—meaning that that city's very design suggests a place where danger is ever-present. For Piltover, on the other hand, the guidelines remind the writers and artists that "designs may look spindly, delicate, and opulent" and that “form and materials are aspirational, designed to reveal wealth. Early prototypes might end up in a museum or in a clan's private collections."

The same lines of thinking suggest recycling as key to envisioning Zaun, both literally and figuratively. When designing the underground city and the characters who live there, the guidelines suggest that Zaun is all about "making magic out of nothing. Nothing is precious, everything can be reworked and made better. Who made something first matters less than who made the better invention." If Zaun had a motto, it might well be "Necessity is the mother of invention."

THIS SPREAD Vi surveys how the Lanes have changed since she was in prison

Not much to comment or show in this aside from Vi and Zaun's architecture

Some windows of the lower levels

How Zaun's architecture combats the darkness is truly amazing to me, all those lights and colorful windows, at least they too have some neon stars to luck up to.

Now...Jinx's Doodles

a little moster eating the 4

She wrote "Undercity" and despite my best efforts I don't understand if whats underneath is simply some swirly doodle or something else.

She drew some little bunnies hangion in one of the pipes,

She added 3 fishes, with

"Eye Fishhead"

"Stinky"

"cool"

"duaa" (i think)

and some little smoke (?) at the bottom

She drew a crossed heart on Vi's back

Some skulls at the bottom of the page

And to end it my favorite due to the implications: she drew what resembles smoke coming from the bottom all the way up, with the words "BREATH" and "WE NEED TO BREATHE" like screams (tho she always uses this handwriting in the artbook).

This is all! Have a good day.

EDIT (request for some close ups) - 24/05/2025

[cowboy-heart]

'A Practice in Limits' - about the ethics of archaeology and bodies

this is for escapril day two, from my own prompt 'huge archaeological find'! it turned out longer and weirder than I planned but that's escapril for you lol....

Ko-Fi (Commissions Open!) Instagram free PDF of my favourite poems!

do not repost without credit! (ID in read more)

[Images ID: an original poem titled 'A Practice in Limits'. the poem is lineated. a '/' symbol will be used to communicate when a word is spaced out from the rest of the line/stanza. poem begins:

The house, or what remained of it, was to be torn down, but the archaeologists pleaded to let them excavate before the deed was done. The funding was hard to acquire, but, finally, the archaeologists began their unearthing of the old Victorian house in Shrewsbury.

For once, they needed no shovels, instead they gloved up and suited up, and stepped into the decaying brick and mortar hollow.

The archaeologists picked apart old furniture, / shattered windows, rusted cans, / rotten food, graffiti cannisters, / cigarette ends, old needles, / rubbish bags, every piece of human abandonment and revival.

But just as one builder raised her sledgehammer to knock out the wall that would allow them to rifle further, there came a breath from the house itself, a / slow wheezing thing that sent dust flocking to block, like crematory ash, the few rays of sun that could still penetrate the murky window grime.

All tools were dropped, aside from their notebooks, of course, the archaeologists backed / away looking in horror as crumbling bricks began to shift, and the voice spoke to them directly: Can I not be left alone, even now? I ask for nothing, I test the limits of my own needs, test the boundaries of my own necessities, hollow out my carcass. Is privacy the last thing I am to lose?

The archaeologists fell to their knees, up to their shins in shards and splinters, but the lead archaeologist stayed standing, spoke for the others, apologised for such brutality, their ravenous need to always know everything. Forgive us, he said, We did not know something could look like this and still be alive.

The old Shrewsbury house said nothing else, and the lead archaeologist turned to his crew, eyes teeming with parasitic life and red from dust or hunger; This is a huge archaeological find, a perfect study in human suffering. And so, its bones were taken out of Shrewsbury, its flesh displayed in the unfamiliar cold halls and walls of glass of the so-called British Museum.

The house was demolished as planned, as it turns out, the council already knew of its once humanity, but profits have to be made. The house never spoke again, but everytime the fireplace was lit, the chimney coughed out the vile smoke from its lungs, and everytime the family sat around the dining room table with no extra plate set / out the windows wailed and / rattled at the dismay of being once again forgotten. What is the line between / remembrance and / objectification?

The old Shrewsbury house had only asked one final question of the hungry excavators, one that none answered: Why study the past, the archaic brutality, when the same suffering can be observed in the house of your neighbour? Is it more reassuring to think that it is only a thing of the past?

end poem. in the bottom right corner of the page, the writer is credited as 'Ren H.' End ID].

[judasrpc]

THE WANDS

a collection of character development questions based on the arcana and their themes !! this is part of a collection of tarot-themed asks. if multi, please specify which muse(s) the question is directed toward !!

[PAGE] - Are they an explorer? If so, what kinds of places have they traveled to recently? Do they have any preferences for the types of places they visit?

[PAGE, REVERSED] - Have they gone on a journey/exploration that they disliked? If so, why did they dislike the journey?

[ACE] - Are they a creative? If so, what types of things do they do? Are they a painter? A writer? Do they make music?

[ACE, REVERSED] - Do people consider them punctual? Are they punctual, or do they tend to be late?

[TWO] - What is the most notable discovery they have made? Was it something new, or something they just didn't know?

[TWO, REVERSED] - Do they fear the unknown, and prefer staying within their comfort zone?

[THREE] - Do they embrace the unknown, and make an effort to leave their comfort zone?

[THREE, REVERSED] - Is their sense of self-preservation strong, or do they take action without a regard to its impact on them?

[FOUR] - Are they involved with their community? If so, how are they involved?

[FOUR, REVERSED] - Are they isolated from their community? If so, why?

[FIVE] - How do they react to a tense situation? Do they try to cut the air, or do they back off?

[FIVE, REVERSED] - How do they release tension? What types of tension do they hold onto (physical, emotional, etc.?)

[SIX] - Can they confidently speak in front of a crowd/in public? If so, what kind of talks would they/do they give?

[SIX, REVERSED] - Do others consider them to be "on a high horse"? Are they prideful? If so, how do they express that?

[SEVEN] - Is there someone/something they're protective of? If so, what are they protecting from?

[SEVEN, REVERSED] - Is there someone/something they feel they aren't protecting enough? If so, what do they believe they could do better?

[EIGHT] - Is there a person or commitment that they dedicated themselves to? If so, who/what?

[EIGHT, REVERSED] - Are they easily frustrated? What tends to make them frustrated, regardless of how easy/difficult it is to frustrate them?

[NINE] - Do they set boundaries with people? If so, does the act come easy to them, or do they have difficulty setting boundaries?

[NINE, REVERSED] - Are they a defensive person? Do they often feel the need to justify setting boundaries/making decisions?

[TEN] - What/who are they responsible for? Do they feel like they have a choice in this responsibility, or is it out of necessity?

[TEN, REVERSED] - Do they internalize their stress? If so, do they try to manage the weight on their shoulders, or do they bottle it up until they explode?

[KNIGHT] - Are they a high-energy or low-energy person? How does that impact the way they communicate with others?

[KNIGHT, REVERSED] - Do others consider them reckless? Do they consider themselves reckless? Are there any behaviors that support or contradict these perceptions?

[QUEEN] - How do they inspire confidence in others? Are they good at giving pep talks?

[QUEEN, REVERSED] - Do they experience mood swings? If so, what does their typical swing look like? Do they start high and end low? Do they find themselves quickly irritable?

[KING] - Have they considered starting their own business, be it aligned with their current work or from a hobby? Do they already have their own business?

[KING, REVERSED] - Do others consider them selfish? Do they consider themselves selfish? Are there any behaviors that support or contradict these perceptions?

[idkhowtopickausername]

YESSSS IM SO HAPPY YOU FINISHED BLACK SAILS!!!!!!!!

Omg I'd love to hear your thoughts on it, what did you think about the ending?? <- big question sorry, I just love your analysis so much aaaaaaa black sails is so good

Aaaahhhh I have so many thoughts it was so good!!! I am having a very hard time focusing on like school and stuff I need to do because it’s filling up my brain with thoughts. I would also love to hear your thoughts too! I also think my thoughts are limited to a certain degree by the fact that I watched it over a pretty long period of time and I haven’t had much time to reflect on it yet either so there’s probably lots of connections and things that I’m missing, plus I don’t remember at all what happens in Treasure Island so I’m probably missing some important contextualizing info that I should look up.

I feel like the last season was really powerful in how it dealt with some of the central themes of the show and it really brought them together in a way that felt nuanced and insightful, I thought the pirates’ alliance with the maroon community was so crucial and I really loved Flint and Madi’s friendship and their characters in the last season. I feel like it really sort of broke down the dichotomy of choosing between war/liberation and loyalty to people you love and it showed that that is a real genuine conflict and something that most of the characters struggle with in very real ways but I think it really transcends the idea that those things are mutually exclusive/a dichotomy and asserts that love and community can exist through mutual commitment to a shared opposition to the empire and that Silver was deluding himself by continuing to believe in that false binary so that he could justify his own final decision—not that the danger of losing loved ones or having to make sacrifices and difficult decisions is any less real, the show makes it clear how real it is, but that Flint and Madi’s revolutionary aspirations were born out of genuine love and hope (and necessity, especially in Madi’s case) on a collective level that Silver could have shared in if he had chosen to, and that his decision in the end was a form of betrayal and disloyalty in itself.

I also thought the way that lots of other characters went against some of their own values or their initial position and eventually sided with the empire in one form or another for their own individual motivations like with Eleanor, Billie, Jack and Max was really well done and the shifting of each of their goals in accordance with their status and priorities felt very realistic. The calculated-ness and effectiveness with which the empire would divide people or offer wealth, safety, and influence in exchange for changing loyalties and betraying one’s former values while also never guaranteeing safety for those already on the margins and being ready to break any promises that were no longer advantageous to it felt very realistic, and the way that the British and Spanish empires worked together to defend their colonial interests was a really chilling and important plot point too I thought.

Max’s storyline in particular really broke my heart because I think she had a more intimate understanding of what working to uphold the empire meant but she still makes the choice that she feels will bring her a greater chance of stability and safety after being denied it all her life even at the expense of others, and tries to set out boundaries about what lines she will and won’t cross so she can be as much at peace with herself as possible but the contradictions and precariousness of holding this position are always there.

I also really loved the monologues and the theme of how stories are crafted and people are vilified to fit the agenda of those in power…the idea that the empire needs people to believe that its reign is inevitable and unbeatable and to not imagine anything else is such an important theme and I love that it voiced that, I love stories that articulate that so much.

I also really loved how many female characters there were who had so many different complex relationships with colonial power and gender roles based on their race and class and sexuality and their personal outlooks and positions and priorities, it felt very rare to see that and I’d like to think more in depth about it because there was so much going on with it thematically.

The ending made me so emotional because it’s like Silver crafted a “happy” ending for Flint without giving him a choice, although what makes it most sad is that the show does clearly illustrate his mindset and how he comes to it and I think he does understand the weight of his decision. The idea of being institutionalized/imprisoned in a “humane” way as a way of getting rid of people who don’t conform to colonial society or actively oppose it is very significant I think in a story about people who have been abandoned or deeply hurt by colonial society trying to find a place for themselves, and treating Flint’s revolutionary mindset as a problem that needs fixing and that can be fixed by a relationship with one person feels like a hollow interpretation of his story that the show itself as criticizing, although I do think the draw of being able to have a loving relationship and be free of the pain and responsibility of warfare is real for Flint like it is for the other characters. I think there’s also an element in the final few episodes of the characters finding the comfort they can in the love and companionship they can salvage despite everything which is sweet and contributes to the complicated emotions but I think it’s very telling that this is not possible for Madi and Silver (at least not with each other).

[bluestar22x]

Falling

The Outcast - Falling

Summary: There is beauty in the heart of winter, especially when shared with someone special

Pairing: Pero Tovar x F!Reader

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 3,300 (ish)

Warnings: Longing, hard on and masturbation implied (not explicit), violence towards a rabbit (sorry buddy, they've got to eat)

Author’s Note: Not going to lie, I had a hard time getting this one out into words, but I did it. Also not going to lie, I listened to "Can you feel the love tonight" by Elton John to set the mood while writing this.

xxx

Of the many things that had eluded Pero in his time, peace was one of the most evasive. It had once been a friend when he was a child, innocent of the harsh realities outside his family's homestead, but it slowly wandered away from him as he was exposed to the world beyond, and it had finally fled him the year he'd lost his entire family.

It only worsened when he became a mercenary out of pure necessity, no longer haunted only by events he could not have prevented.

At times, even in war, the world could be serene, but not for Pero, whose thoughts darkened whenever they were left to roam with nothing else to turn to.

He had learned to hate complete silence. As much as he sometimes groaned over William's waffling, in the end it had helped ease his mind, fill it with anything but what the monster at the back of his head wished for him to focus on. Being around his friend had made life a little more tolerable.

It was different with you. You hardly spoke most days, unless you deemed it necessary. You seemed to thrive on it, the silence, and at first Pero envied you, until he stumbled into peace once more.

Sometime in the dead of winter he found it again, discovering it had not been as far out of his grasp as he'd once thought. It had just taken some coaxing, luring out by the nature of the way you lived and the nature that surrounded you.

In many ways living with you reminded him of his childhood. After over two decades he found himself once more secluded, left to focus on his basic needs and the needs of the animals he found himself caring for.

Many of his fellow mercenaries would have found it boring compared to the thrill of battle, one he'd had a love/hate relationship with, but he'd surprisingly settled well back into the lifestyle once he'd given it a chance.

In truth, this life could never be dull. Even with your quiet, even with your consistent schedule, the animals would not let it be so. On any given day a goat may escape its paddock or a horse might find itself tangled up in something (the latest had been Thor's nasty run in with some fallen branches from a hawthorn tree after he'd jumped the boundary of his pasture again).

Even when they weren't busy escaping, the animals sometimes got into trouble other ways or caused mischief.

You had one particular event you liked to remind him of most, to taut him with, on those days you were feeling playful. He'd been assisting you with the feeding of your billy goats one morning when the youngest, the almost pure white one who was appropriately named Trouble, came up behind him and gave him a good, literal nip on the butt for no apparent reason other than being a goat. Even with the padding of his pants between his skin and the goat's teeth it had still left Pero sore for days, not that he had admitted it to you. No, you had enough fuel from seeing his face when it had occurred. Had been thrown into a fit of laughter over it many times since, to his dismay.

Despite his grievances with that particular goat, he did find plenty of pleasant times amongst them, even smiling on occasion at their daily antics when you weren't looking, of course.

While he kept that side of himself hidden from you, and you kept pieces of yourself from him, you still both learned much about each other by just being in close proximity.

You'd learned enough to be able to communicate with each other without spoken word, something that became invaluable during your hunts together.

It was especially useful on the days when voices easily echoed through the forest.

On one such day, when the air was crisp and the sun bright, you walked your horses in single file through the thick forest a quarter mile from your cottage, the snow almost up to your boots before the horses plowed through. Pero was in saddle on Thor and you were bareback on Clover as you often were. With your knowledge of the area Pero always let you lead, not that he really had any power to choose. You were strong willed and used to getting your way. His presence had not done anything to change that. He wouldn't have wanted it to anyway; his respect for you was too great.

About an hour into the hunt you abruptly halted Clover and looked over your shoulder at him, head angled downward. He followed the gesture and glanced at the ground by her mare's front feet. After peering at the spot for a few seconds he noticed what she had. Rabbit footprints. A trail of them that happened to follow the same path you both were on, though the much smaller creature had been able to hop along without sinking into the snow.

He gave you a nod to assure you he'd seen the same thing and pulled the bow he was carrying off his back as well as an arrow from a quiver that he had strapped over his shoulder. It was yours, but you allowed him borrow it whenever he joined you on hunts. You had a matching one, except yours was more lightweight. Yours was spread out on your lap, your arrows on your hip inside a smaller quiver.

You encouraged Clover to very slowly push through the snow as you watched for the rabbit to appear ahead and Pero did the same with Thor. When your eyes set on a fallen log in the path, the white rabbit appeared from behind it.

Pero saw you tense up and scanned ahead, eyes locking on the rabbit in a matter of a second or two. He had time to lift his bow into position and nock an arrow before you could, only by a moment, but it was long enough for him to fire on the creature.

The arrow landed at the animal's hind feet and it bolted, startled by the near miss. Pero cursed loudly over his lousy shot, but you kept your cool, still eying the rabbit and moving with it as it put distance between you both.

It felt entirely too long to Pero, but it was just enough before you released your arrow and sent it flying right into the rabbit's chest, instantly rendering it lifeless, its body flopping over on a patch of bare stone.

You glanced back at him with a smug expression on your face, eyebrows hiked up.

He scowled at you. "Lucky shot."

"It's called skill, Pero," you boasted, a broad smile plastered on your face.

Sometimes you reminded him of William. William had been almost supernaturally good at archery, and you weren't too far behind. Neither of you were humble about it.

He wouldn't admit it, but he was thoroughly impressed by you, even though being far outdone by yet another person wounded his ego. I ought to stick to swords, he thought bitterly.

"You're just mad a woman is better at something than you are," you added as you dismounted to collect the dead animal.

You weren't entirely wrong. It did sting more, but it wasn't the only reason. Pero knew he was generally a sore loser. As far as he was concerned though, it was useful. He was certain he'd survived many a battle out of his pure unwillingness to be showed up by opposing soldiers and mercenaries.

You squatted to snatch the limp rabbit up by its hind legs and approached him, nodding to the saddlebag attached to his saddle by a couple tie down straps.

He unbuckled the flap that closed the bag and opened it up so you could stuff the rabbit's body inside it.

"You wouldn't need to use mine if you had yours," Pero said pointedly, still not understanding why you hardly used your saddle. You'd once told him it was for warmth, to share body heat with your mare, but the weather that day could hardly be called bitter.

"I never do," you told him. "I could easily swing the body over Clover's neck with a rope. But then I'd risk losing the meat while racing you back."

He had no time to react to your words before you swung back up onto Clover's back and kicked her sides, sending her into a reckless canter through the forest, along the same trail the horses had just stomped out.

Thor pranced in place, yearning to run as well, and Pero muttered to himself about how pointless it was to do so before letting his reins loose anyway, giving the stallion permission to bolt down the path after you both.

He'd never done this before. Let his horse run for the sake of it, and as wayward branches smacked him in the chest and face he was quickly reminded why. Moving at such speeds could be dangerous and it was an unnecessary waste of energy for any horse about to see battle or any that were recovering from one.

Neither was the case for Thor that day, and when the trees gave way to field Pero suddenly forgot all his other concerns.

He could see you several lengths ahead, flying head long into the soft morning breeze on Clover's wide back, the horse kicking up powder as she threw herself into a gallop, albeit a slow one due to the snow not being quite trampled down enough to prevent her from sinking into it.

He couldn't see much of you besides your winter coat as he trailed behind you, but for a moment you had your head thrown back, nose pointed to the sky, and he could sense the joy, imagine the wide grin on your face. It made his lips curl up and his heart skip in a way he could not explain if someone had asked him to.

He urged Thor into a pace that would allow him to keep up, and felt the same kind of thrill you were likely experiencing bubbling up in his chest. The rush of adrenaline one gets when you take a risk, not for survival, but for the hell of it. He'd experienced it plenty enough during his youth to remember what it felt like. It was a more than welcome feeling after so long.

He'd almost caught up with you when the cottage came into view and you started to slow Clover down, though the horse was hardly breathless. Pero pulled Thor up beside you, face neutral, once more hiding the side of him he'd deemed soft from you.

"Rabbit stew?" you inquired, a smile still adorning your face. "My grandmother created a recipe in her twenties that's to die for."

He grunted. "If you intend to fatten me up so I cannot leave come spring, your family's secrets are indeed the best route to success."

You chortled at his comment, and he almost laughed too. Almost.

"Amma's famous rabbit stew it is."

x

Pero ate so much rabbit stew for both his meals that day that he fell asleep by the fire after the last, waking only after the night was in full force. There was a blanket draped over him that hadn't been there before and he smiled slightly at the thought of you taking the time to shield his body from the chill that often found its way into your home after dark. You were always looking after him like that, even though you didn't need to, even though he was very capable of taking care of himself.

He liked that about you most, your selflessness. The kind that led you to care for a stranger, though you were hardly strangers by then, were you? At least not anymore.

Pero stood with a groan, his stiff, aching back and knees ever reminding him of his last two decades spent in battle and on horseback.

He glanced around the cottage for you, but you weren't there, and he wondered if it was early enough that you were still out feeding the animals. He donned his coat and made his way outside, surprised by the calm, stillness of the night. Usually night meant bitter wind.

The weather was not all he was surprised by.

Instead of being behind or in the barn, you were out in the field in front of the cottage, your upper body lying flat on Clover's bare back, though your butt and legs were still properly positioned for riding. Pero trudged your way, wondering what in God's name you were doing on your horse so late at night, until he got close enough to see that you were gazing up at the clear sky above you, studying the thousands of shining white specks, stars, that were spread across its midnight blue.

The peace in your expression almost made him turn back, not wanting to spoil your alone time, but something had him rooted to the ground he was standing upon a few yards from you, watching, taking in the view. Not of the sky, but of you. Your silhouette blended with Clover's in the dark, as if you'd morphed into a very flexible centaur, and he realized then that you did not ride bareback just for shared warmth, but also because of the oneness you felt with her when the saddle wasn't present. Clover was always more responsive to you when you left the saddle in the barn. She could read you better, as you could her.

His conclusion had Pero scrambling to recall the last time he'd felt at one with anything or anyone, but his mind blanked out. Though he'd been close to other people emotionally, had experienced physical intimacy of every kind, spiritual closeness had evaded him as well as he'd avoided devotion to any religion.

He had never yearned for that kind of connection until that night, as he observed yours with Clover and the world around you. He could have watched you all night, lived vicariously through you.

You felt him near you before he could.

"Beautiful night," you declared, only just loud enough for him to hear. You did not turn your head to look at him, you just kept on talking, your eyes still focused on the heavens above. "It's not often it's clear enough to stargaze in the winter. I could not resist."

He cleared his throat. "No need to resist because of my presence. I will leave you to it and return to the cottage, if I am to presume the animals are already fed?"

You nodded confirmation that they were and sat upright, using nothing but your core strength to do it, and he had to adjust himself in his pants before you looked his way, aroused by your motion. If anyone asked, he could not deny his attraction to you, but he knew he could not act on it. You had shown no sign of feeling the same towards him, and he was your guest, so he dealt with his discomfort however he could when you weren't near enough to overhear him.

"I'd rather you join me for a ride," you said as your eyes fell upon him.

He arched his brows. "At this time of night?"

"I want to see if the dancing lights are out," you explained.

"Dancing lights?" Pero was lost. He had no idea what you were talking about.

"It's worth the trip to the top of the mountain," you promised. "Trust me."

Who was he to resist your plea?

He agreed to the ride and headed for the pasture, leading Thor out by his mane.

You frowned as you rode Clover over to the fence line. "Aren't you going to get your saddle, bridle?"

Pero stood at Thor's shoulder and readied himself to climb on, using a large rock to give him a little extra height. As tall as he was, he hadn't tried this in a long time and mounting from the ground with stirrups was already difficult enough for him.

“Not tonight,” he replied shortly, swinging up on his steed. It wasn't easy, even with the assist from the stone. He almost slipped back off by Thor's shoulder, but managed to cling on and straighten himself out, though his grunts of effort probably could have been heard for a mile. At least you seemed amused by his lack of grace, choking on the laugh bubbling up in your chest. As embarrassed as he was, Pero liked the sound of your laughter.

You forced a cough, trying to compose yourself, then silently guided him away from the farm, starting up the steepest side of the mountain, without any supplies.

He followed you hesitantly, praying a sudden storm would not form.

x

You rode towards the top of the mountain with a relaxed confidence, only occasionally twisting around to make sure Pero was still close behind.

He hung back a few yards, attempting to appear at ease, but you could tell your impromptu trip had spiked some anxiety within him. You wondered how much was because of who he was and how much was from his near death experience.

You felt an unexplainable twinge as you thought back to the fateful day that you'd found him. If you had never known him, if you'd been too late or hadn't stumbled upon him, you wouldn't know who you were missing, but you did know him, and there was pain in knowing how close you'd been to not sharing your life with him.

It was dangerous to your heart, thinking in such a manner, but even if all you could ever be was friends, even if he left in the spring and you never saw him again, you knew you wouldn't trade this winter with him for anything. Wouldn't trade the moment that came next as you crested your mountain and the rest of the chain it belonged to materialized into view, all eight of its companions snow capped and massive in their own right, most even taller than the one you'd claimed as yours.

But it wasn't the mountain range's beauty that you focused on that night - it was the glowing, dancing, green wavy lights in the sky that kissed a few of the other peaks.

You'd witnessed them a few times each winter since you'd moved into the cottage, but the lights never failed to cause you to catch your breath, to marvel at the beauty of it. You did not know why they only sometimes formed at night during the winter, why they formed at all, but you didn't need to know to enjoy the view.

"Do you have these lights in the south?" you asked Pero as Thor came to a stop alongside Clover.

"We do not," he answered, studying the sky before him, eyes narrowed, as if he were trying to figure out the source of the mysterious lights. "But I have heard of these lights before, from other mercenaries."

"Aren't they magical?" you questioned dreamily, staring ahead.

You heard him huff. "Magic does not exist. Just because we do not understand it doesn't make it supernatural."

"That's not the kind of magic I'm talking about," you told him, glancing in his direction. "I meant the kind of magic that we know has an explanation, even if we have not figured it out yet, but is still wondrous to us anyway. Like how a babe grows in their mother's womb, or how sometimes the ground shakes for no apparent reason. Episteme will not change the feeling I have every time I am blessed with witnessing these lights."

Pero nodded in understanding. "They are indeed, wondrous."

You glanced over to him again, finding his eyes on you instead of the lights, and your heart pounded in your chest as he smiled at you briefly. A real smile that filled your belly with warmth.

You wondered then if he felt the same for you as you did him, or if you were reading into things too much. If you were simply just a friend to him, a sister, maybe, or something more. You were too afraid to ask. Too convinced it didn't matter.

After all, come spring he would part from you, and you'd be alone once more.

You couldn't see the benefit in exposing yourself to that kind of heartbreak.

You wouldn't admit to yourself you'd already fallen.

xxx

Tagged: @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed

xxx

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

xxx

[dimdiamond]

What are some of your favourite Tintin headcanons? Whether that be about Tintin himself, the albums, his relationships or just any other character :)

OH I HAVE MANY OF THEM!!! I am afraid this would be a looooong post so I will put headcanons about Tintin and his relationship with some characters under the cut!

Tintin

Many maybe won't agree with this but I headcanon him as not being fluent in languages. He tries really hard to learn them but he has difficulty and even after studying them he's more comfortable to listen than speak in this language. The reason he has managed to communicate with other foreigners is because they know French (as French was a worldwide language at least before WW2).

He LOVES comics and picture books but he's ashamed of buying them or asking them from the library so he always mixes them with more serious books and magazines to get them unnoticed. In the early stage of living in Marlinespike mansion he hid them (although the rest eventually found out, after Haddock having suspected that Tintin might have a secret investigation going on and Calculus and Nestor having suspected that he just hid porn magazines or something) but gradually he let himself enjoy his hobby freely, finally feeling comfortable and safe.

Tintin and Milou

They're both coquettish but Milou is more than Tintin and Tintin is reminded of this everytime Milou refuses to wear any other collar except the most fancy one.

The first period Tintin had Milou he tried to discipline him but gave up and let his puppy sleep with him on his bed. When eventually Milou wanted his space and started sleeping in his own basket (or other random places) the one who was sad wasn't the dog.

Tintin and the cat of Marlinespike

They're both cats, they needed time to get used to each other but now if you can't find the cat with Haddock, you'll find it with Tintin. Don't you dare separate them!

Tintin and Haddock

No matter what they will always say Good Morning and Goodnight. It's the only rule they have set between them and try to follow it every day. It happened gradually, having spent so many days together traveling and if not traveling talking on the phone, but after The Land of Black Gold, where it was the first time they separated since they met, it just felt like a necessity, to make sure the other is fine and well. Living together made it only easier for them to keep this up. And if one of them doesn't get to say one of the two it immediately means that something is wrong.

Their birthdays are one day apart (Tintin's on 10 January and Haddock's on 9 January) so they celebrate them together by blowing the candles on the birthday cake at midnight. They usually have a gathering with friends on 9 January and leave the 10th of January for something fun to do together. (I will stop here because I won't be able to shut up about them)

Tintin and Calculus

Tintin has mad respect for Calculus and always listens carefully to what he's saying and Calculus considers Tintin the only one who can actually keep up with his way of thinking but at the same time he can't keep up with Tintin's way of thinking so their interactions are mostly: Tintin absorbing all the infodump by Calculus/ Calculus worried but intrigued to see what Tintin will do (for example when he shows a new invention).

Calculus will never initiate a hug with Tintin (like he does with Haddock) because he knows Tintin has his boundaries and if he wants a hug or touching he will initiate it.

Tintin and Nestor

Nestor will never let Tintin alone in the kitchen no matter how much Tintin nags that he can manage well enough warming his milk. He doesn't. He put the kitchen in fire. (Note: not that Tintin can't handle a kitchen but Marlinespike mansion's kitchen is another story and till he got used to it he was careless and Nestor loves his kitchen alright).

Nestor kinda still feels bad for how their first meeting was (although when he gets pissed off with Tintin he remembers that time he hit his head longingly) but Tintin doesn't even count this time he got hit on his head by an old man as the list is long and frankly other bad guys deserve to be in the list than Nestor.

Tintin never asked things from Nestor during his visits and he kept this attitude the first period of his living in the mansion until Nestor had enough and started asking him what he wants (like "Do you want coffee or tea?", "Do you want me to add the towels in the laundry?"). Slowly Tintin got used to have someone doing the chores for him but never neglects saying "Thank you" to Nestor.

Tintin and Thompsons

They had a rough start but this was what made Tintin respect them and regard them as good policemen and detectives and now friends. The same goes for them as now they fully respect and admire Tintin. Tintin's secret is that he finds himself agreeing with them many times but he won't ever admit that as it would end up being embarrassing since their thoughts are proven false. But yes, this is why he is always open to hear their ideas and thoughts but won't comment on them until they are proven wrong or Haddock says his snarky comment. Tintin laughs but it's mostly of the thought "Oh, your comment made me see how this doesn't make sense, thank you". Nevertheless, Tintin likes to tease them too, as he likes to tease all his close friends.

Tintin and Chang

They exchange letters regularly and even more often after Tibet. When Chang starts traveling to the world and shares the news with Tintin, who has gradually lessened his trips, Tintin can't help but feel proud and happy for him (and a bit jealous but mostly because he misses his friend so every time after Chang's letter he starts planning with Haddock a visit to him).

After Tibet their friendship changes to one more sincere and equal, meaning that both are more open and honest with each other and see each other on the same level (because Chang always saw Tintin above him before that, idolizing him even). This leads to fighting but they always make up immediately. (I have a long post about my thoughts on them so I will stop here before it becomes too long)

Tintin and Castafiore

Of all the relationships, this might be the most "familial" that any other. Tintin likes opera but that's not the only reason he admires Castafiore. She is a strong woman with a loud personality but elegance and most of all a huge heart, even if she tends to love luxury way more than Tintin, and this heart was what made Tintin trust her and consider her a dear friend. Castafiore sees Tintin as most people won't dare to see Tintin, a young gentleman who needs to be protected and spoiled. Maybe she sees in him something of herself as she was young and proud and confident and she knows how desperately he needs to be reminded of his vulnerability. Whatever it is, Tintin lets her be, to the surprise of everyone, because he can't find himself being strict with her, in a way spoiling her in return.

They are both into messing up with Haddock and that's why Tintin not only lets her do it but mostly gets amused by this torment. Of course, it's because he knows there's no ill intention behind it. Tintin sees it as it really is, teasing between two much alike friends who otherwise would fight all day.

Tintin and Captain Chester

At first, Tintin didn't see Haddock's old friend with a good eye (mostly because he was afraid that Haddock would prefer the company of his old friend to his new friend) but he soon realised that in Chester he can see an ally and mostly a friend that he can catch up with his way of thinking. Without either of them realising, they share more common traits besides their mutual care for Haddock and they can read each other dangerously well.

The rare times they happen to meet and go to someplace where it's music, it's over, they will dance nonstop (they're both excellent dancers with a good sense of rhythm).

Tintin and Abdullah

I have mentioned before how much these two are alike but the thing is that neither of them sees it. They both refuse to back down and insist on the other to indulge them and their relationship only starts to get fixed with time, as Tintin changes his point of view regarding children and gets more sympathetic and more like "the adult who is here to understand the kid" and not "the adult whom the kid must listen to". Abdullah changes his opinion on Tintin too as he gets to learn him better. His pranks are aimed at Haddock, anyway.

I imagine when Abdullah is a teenager, he confides in Tintin and asks for advice on various matters and Tintin is more than eager to help him. (He wouldn't go to Haddock because it's embarrassing to go to your childhood crush for advice and such)

Tintin and Zorrino

Tintin gets really well with Zorrino but he doesn't realize it's mostly because Zorrino idolizes him and most probably is his first crush. As Zorrino gets older and gets over his childhood crush he can see Tintin as the older friend who can always count on. Tintin remains oblivious.

Zorrino keeps in touch with both Tintin and Haddock (the last one securing the boy's education and anything he needs for his life and he is ready to even host him in the mansion if he ever needs it) but mostly ends up exchanging letters with Haddock, something that makes Tintin evaluate again his relationship with kids and teenagers.

Tintin and Martine

After Martine getting rejected, they end up being besties who go to art exhibitions together, to shopping, to drinking cocktails, etc. Look, I just need Tintin to have a friend his age close to where he lives, especially a girl so they can do all the girly stuff he hesitated to do alone (like wearing dresses or talking about emotions- he's a repressed man, I am not making the rules). In return, Tintin helps her to stop basing her confidence on things like fortune-telling and boosts her confidence by teaching her how to demand what she deserves.

Tintin and Mrs. Flinch

He still stops from time to time at his old apartment building to check on his landlady and drink tea or coffee together while exchanging news. She always buys his newspaper and reads all his articles and writes down her thoughts to share them with him whenever he comes. Tintin will never say out loud how much he is grateful to her for all the help she had given him when he didn't even have a bed to sleep in because he can't find enough words to express that. Mrs. Flinch sees that through his visits.

Tintin and Jolyon Wagg

Tintin doesn't like him. Especially every time he comments on his bachelorhood.

[qhazuban]

thinking a lot about how phrases like

“I’m at capacity, I can’t engage [with you] right now” / “I don’t have the capacity to reconnect” / “I don’t have capacity for more connections” / etc.

“Thank you for sharing [your vulnerability]”

“These are my boundaries, I’m articulating them so we can better show up and care for each other / be in community with each other”

“I want to honour your needs and boundaries” / “What do you need / what are your boundaries?”

“What’s bringing you joy these days?”

“I want to be intentional with our plans” / “I’m setting an intention to…”

“Let’s unpack that” / “There’s a lot to unpack here” / etc.

“Let’s practice authenticity”

“I’m looking for slowness and intentionality”

“That’s so valid”

“I want to be mindful of…”

& other such vocabulary popular in the lexicon of western social justice communities, gentle parenting and nonviolent communication circles, tenderqueer social circles, various new age / woo / healing social spheres, etc etc

just feel like lies, codes, ways of obfuscating and justifying, getting away from really being direct and honest (while ironically purporting to be direct and honest forms of communication), ways to say “wow you’re toxic / oversharing / crossing boundaries / immature / clearly in need of healing / etc, get away from me” without actually saying it

I need to articulate this more, but I guess it all feels related to my thoughts on liberal boundaries discourse

I do use some of this language too, sometimes, both out of necessity and exposure and habit and whatever, often because it feels like the only way to communicate with all these people who don’t even realize how deeply individualistic and alienating this kind of communication is, I’m not saying it’s always terrible or should never be used or whatever, it’s complicated obviously

but then I have to feel guilty both for using the language when it feels so fake *and* for feeling angry about the language itself since apparently that means I’m just a terrible person who doesn’t believe in boundaries or respect or whatever at all 🙄

anyway I need to articulate this more & there’s so much constantly swirling in my head about it but it all feels very very much part of disposability culture, the thing we do not name or talk about enough or properly, all these ways to seem so “evolved” and “self-actualized”

honestly i would just prefer if you said

“I’m exhausted I can’t deal with this”

“I’m angry about [xyz], I don’t want to talk to you anymore”

“yeah I don’t trust you, bye”

“why are you oversharing so much” / “that’s too much information” / “just shut up now”

“yeah if you do this again I’m leaving, bye”

“if you can’t communicate in a healthy way then I don’t want to talk to you”

“why are you so upset all the time, can’t you be happy sometimes”

“you’re too chaotic to do things with”

“this is too overwhelming”

“I don’t want to deal with all that”

“you’re overwhelming me”

“yeah you’re being too real, stop it”

“that’s crazy, get away from me”

“okay whatever but that’s too much again”

or whatever else

and, you know, it’s valid (haha) to feel overwhelmed, tired, scared, etc

and I wish we could just say that

instead of inventing all these ways to obfuscate and act like we’re so “in touch with our feelings” when we are really, really not

[hamms-uwu-12]

how do silas and saul navigate the asexual x horny bastard thing

That's a good question, I have sort of thought about it from time to time... Either way, it's gonna be a big block of text under the cut xD

Not sure if I have to put content warnings but just in case. Cw: non-explicit mentions of sex.

Okay, so, they already have a kinda slow pace to their relationship/dynamic from their "meeting and realizing feelings" phase, which makes it easier to set boundaries, talk about what to expect n whatnot.

They're both very perceptive, Saul gets the memo of Silas not being interested in his sexual advances (even before Silas talks to him about it) and Silas can't help but notice that maybe there's more to Saul than he lets on.

The thing about them is that, I see them learning from each other to grow a bit as people. Silas, while he's asexual, he's pretty open minded and curious, at his own pace, ends up learning from Saul. And Saul learns to open up and accept that spark of Jimmy within him that wants to be a romantic and love tenderly or something.

Ofc, at first they'd take their time to communicate what they have to let the other know. Silas makes it clear that he, most likely, won't be able to meet all os Saul's more intimate needs, so to speak, at once. That he needs time n such and he's not opposed to Saul hooking up with other people/talking to sex workers to satisfy that necessity. All he needs is that Saul is honest and lets him know where he's going and if he's safe.

"Look, I won't tell you what to do or not do... What to feel or not feel. No soy nadie pa' decirte que hacer con tu vida... All I ask for is your honesty and that you keep yourself safe until I get over my own stuff and we take things one step at a time."

-Silas talking to Saul one night.

Thank you for letting me yap a lot, I think that's all that I've thought about that topic... Since I don't really think much outside the romantic part of their relationship and whatever shenanigans get to. I hope you liked it and that I managed to get the message across/answered well (I'm not that good at writing, let alone in English 💀)

Have bunny photos as a thank you for reading

[pumpkin-the-girlie-girl-vixen]

📱 This is the text message I sent my mother, it marked a turning point for me. It was the moment I finally found my backbone and stood up for both myself and my partner. I refused to let her disrupt my peace or tarnish the beautiful life I’ve built without her meddling and undermining my efforts. I won’t allow her to stigmatize my progress and growth any longer. Throughout this journey, I’ve learned that “love” alone isn’t enough to keep someone in your life.

Dear Mom,

I need to set some very clear boundaries regarding our relationship, especially concerning how you speak about my partner. Despite my multiple warnings, you continue to talk negatively about him and try to influence me against him. I want you to understand that he is the best person I’ve ever been with—someone who brings out the best in me that nobody else ever has.

I see parts of you in me, especially when it comes to our struggles. The key difference is that I have been committed to therapy and medication since I was nine years old, and now, at almost 30, I’m still working on myself. You, on the other hand, have never sought therapy and have only taken a fraction of what I have in terms of medication.

I want to be honest: marijuana is not helping you. It exacerbates your BPD, enhancing your worst qualities. There are actual studies that indicate not all medication works for everyone, including marijuana. For the past four months, I haven’t even touched it myself.

Michael is not taking advantage of me; he has not pushed himself into my life or my home. He moved in because we both wanted to share our lives together—something I approached responsibly for the first time. He is a responsible, mature person who supports me, allowing me to feel capable. It’s disappointing that you view me as incapable and irresponsible, while I know my worth and what I bring to the table.

You need to address your erratic moods with medication, just as I do. I suggest therapy not because I think you’re “crazy,” but because I believe it could help you develop social skills, like how to communicate without resorting to name-calling or cursing, which only escalates tensions and doesn’t solve problems.

I’m trying to build my own life and family because I realize I’ve never had the support I needed from the family I was born into. I’ve worked hard to reach this point, and I had hoped to reconnect with you and my family in North Dakota. However, I now see that if I never felt like I belonged, then I won’t find that connection now.

I’m genuinely happy and at peace, doing things I never had the chance to do before, thanks to the positive support from Michael. Building a life requires a support system that believes in you, something I feel is missing from our relationship. A lesson I’ve learned in therapy is that conflict resolution starts with understanding each other’s perspectives, not trying to place blame or prove who is right or wrong.

This difference between us—my commitment to mental health and your refusal to seek help—has led me to back away. I need to distance myself from you, not out of desire, but out of necessity. I’m going to continue living my happy life with Michael, and I’m sad you haven’t taken the opportunity to get to know him. He truly respects me and supports my happiness.

I cannot tolerate being treated like a child or being made to feel inadequate any longer. I’m aware that you see the boys as adults because of their progress, but your perception of me feels stuck, overshadowed by how you view my life through a screen. It’s painful, and I hope you realize your role in that.

I love you, but I can’t allow you to undermine the happiness I’ve found—a happiness that has helped me grow and love myself for the first time. Your words have often made me feel stupid and inadequate, and that’s something I can no longer accept.

I expect that my message will be met with defensiveness, but I need you to take accountability. You’ve chosen not to seek help, while I’m striving to be better every day. Your journey is yours, but I need to focus on mine now. I won’t respond to your messages or phone calls, and I’m stepping back from social media. I’m choosing emotional intelligence for the sake of my peace.

What I want from you is love, and it shouldn’t come with a price tag. I doubt I’ll receive that, but I will still wish you well. Merry Christmas, happy New Year, happy birthday, and all the holidays I’ll miss. This isn’t a choice I wanted to make, but it’s one I need to.

Goodbye, Mom. 🤟

As you might expect, she didn’t receive my text very well… So, in closing, I’m putting my relationship with my mom to rest—for my peace, comfort, and love. ❤️

Navigating the Complexities of My Relationship with My Mother

The relationship between a mother and daughter can often be a beautiful bond, but mine has been a complicated tapestry woven with threads of pain, misunderstanding, and growth. That little girl inside me still exists, a ghost from a time when things with my mom were far from good. She almost had me fooled, weaving a narrative that I was nothing without her, but after everything she put me through, I’ve discovered a strength within myself that I never knew existed.

From a young age, I found myself fighting for a place in my mother’s world, striving to meet expectations that seemed to shift with the changing winds. No matter how much I worked or how desperately I sought acceptance, I felt like I was always falling short. It was an emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual battle that consumed much of my childhood and adult life whenever we interacted. It might not have been all-consuming at once, but as a collective experience, it truly sucked. She brought the flames and put me through hell, teaching me the hard way that I had to learn to fight for myself. And deep down, I think she knows it too. We both know the truths that could be told, but instead, I’ll simply say, “I wish you farewell.”

I can make it on my own now. I’ve learned that I don’t need her in my life; I’ve found a newfound strength that’s empowering. For years, I was the one forgiving her, often without ever hearing an apology in return or seeing any accountability for her actions. It’s astonishing to think that I’ve never witnessed her say sorry to any of my siblings or even to my dad. From the age of nine, she placed me in therapy, and now at 28, I realize the irony. I’ve perfected the art of communication, taking accountability and truly meaning it each time I’ve said I was sorry. Yet, it’s disheartening to realize that while I’ve worked on conflict resolution, she seems to play the role of the menacing, abusive mother with no intention of changing.

She has this uncanny ability to shift blame onto everyone else once things go wrong, ignoring her part in all of it. When it’s clear she’s at fault, she pretends as though it never happened the next day, expecting us to move on as if nothing is amiss. Yet, she holds onto others’ wrongdoings that affect her like a badge of honor, despite her own history of mistakes. I often wonder if she ever forgives herself. If she does, it truly disappoints me.

If I could tell her one thing, it would be this: “He is good, so good. He treats your little girl like a real man should. He makes promises he keeps.” I want her to understand that I’m okay, and that when I watch my baby grow up, I hope she finds the kind of man I’ve found—loving, respectful, gentle, and kind. My partner reminds me of my dad—the morals and values he holds bring me back to the essence of home. If only my mother weren’t so stuck in the past, unable to see that I’ve learned from my mistakes and found someone worthy of my heart.

But the reality is, I can’t get through to her. I never could as a child, and I doubt I’ll be able to as an adult, not without her committing to medication, therapy, and applying what she’s learned. Sadly, it seems she wouldn’t even entertain that notion. In order for me to build the family I’ve always wanted for myself, I’ve had to let go of her. I still visit the memories of our past, but everyone has to grow up.

It pains me to admit that I had to cut her off. She was my first best friend, and for most of my life, I viewed her as the most important person to me. But now, at the age of 28, I’m finally awakening to the truth: “Huh, we are not that close.” The other day, I almost reached for my phone to chit-chat with her, only to remember the reality of our relationship. I set the phone down and sat in silence for a while. I would rather hear nothing than face the hurtful words she’s hurled at me over the years—words no mother should ever say to her daughter.

In conclusion, my relationship with my mother is a complicated one, and while I mourn the bond we could have had, I’m also grateful for the strength I've discovered through the struggles. I’m moving forward and building a life where I can thrive, free from the shadows of a tumultuous past. And for that little girl who still lives inside me, I promise to protect her fiercely from the flames that once consumed us both.

In closing, I want to reflect on the happiness I’ve found with my partner. Despite the attempts to push a negative narrative onto my shoulders, I’ve realized that it’s not the story I’m living. I’m living a life filled with joy, love, and support—something I never thought I could have. I feel incredibly blessed to have my partner by my side, who nurtures my growth and embraces me for who I truly am. Together, we’re building a beautiful future, and I’m grateful every day for the love we share. Here’s to celebrating the life we’re creating together and leaving behind the negativity that no longer serves me!

[notangelversal]

✧⠀𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐋𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐬

The mortals had no knowledge of Existence, no prayers whispered to celestial beings, no temples erected in honor of gods they could not see. They lived as though the world had always been theirs, their lives rooted in the tangible, the immediate, and the shared rhythms of survival. Yet, even without gods to guide them, they had created a thriving world, one that hummed with life and activity.

At first, their society had been a marvel of cooperation. Villages carved from crystalline forests shimmered under a sky of infinite hues, their light refracting across rivers of liquid starlight. The air smelled of sweet, unending spring, and the seasons were gentle, each passing like a breeze rather than a storm. The beings moved through their days with purpose, crafting tools from obsidian and rare metals, building homes of smooth stone and glass that glowed faintly at night.

They spoke in a language of shared understanding, one that required few words and relied on gestures, expressions, and the tones of their voices. It was a language born not of necessity, but of unity, a way to communicate without confusion or malice. This harmony extended into their work and their play. Farmers tilled soil as fertile as gold dust, hunters roamed freely through endless plains, and artisans painted their dreams onto massive tapestries that fluttered in the ever-present wind.

But the perfection was brittle, and it could not last.

As their numbers grew, so did their desires. What had once been simple pleasures — the laughter of children, the taste of fruit so sweet it could bring tears—became overshadowed by a hunger for more. More land, more power, more glory. In the bustling markets of the great city, where beings traded precious goods and whispered of distant lands, the first cracks began to show.

Voices grew sharper, and disputes became more frequent. Farmers argued over the rights to water from the crystalline rivers, accusing one another of hoarding or taking more than their share. In the grand halls where leaders once sat in peaceful counsel, debates over boundaries turned into shouting matches. The artisans, once content to create for the joy of creation, began to covet recognition, each seeking to outshine the others.

The beings, once a single people, began to divide.

In the northern reaches, where mountains kissed the clouds, a group calling themselves The Elevators began to form. They believed that their towering peaks symbolized their destiny — to rise above the others and guide them toward greatness. They saw themselves as leaders, chosen by their superior intellect and ambition.

In the verdant lowlands, the Rooted Ones rejected this notion. They valued tradition and preservation, clinging to the old ways and the natural harmony they believed had been lost. To them, the Elevators were arrogant and reckless, disruptors of a peace that could have endured forever.

The divisions didn’t stop there. Across the oceans, scattered islands bred their own factions, each convinced they had the key to a better future. Some sought isolation, building barriers of stone and fire to keep outsiders away. Others became conquerors, setting their sights on expansion, their ships slicing through the star-kissed waves like predators in the night.

The beings’ world, once a unified whole, now felt fragmented. Villages that had once welcomed travelers with open arms now built walls, turning away anyone who didn’t share their beliefs. The once-shared language began to splinter, with new dialects forming that made understanding each other harder.

But it wasn’t just the external that had changed. The beings themselves began to feel the effects of their growing discontent. Dreams turned restless, filled with shadows and strange whispers. The starlit rivers that had once soothed them with their song now seemed to murmur of secrets and lies. Even the air felt different, heavier, as though it carried the weight of their unease.

Yet, amid the chaos, there were those who remembered the old ways. In hidden groves and quiet corners, small groups gathered to speak of unity, to share stories of a time when they had all been one. They whispered of the harmony that had been, hoping to spark a memory strong enough to turn the tide.

But even they were beginning to lose faith. As the days turned to weeks, and the weeks to months, the fractures widened. The mortals’ world was no longer one of shared purpose. It had become a world of factions, of mistrust, and of a growing, unspoken fear — fear that their perfect world was slipping away, and there was nothing they could do to stop it.

Little did they know, their strife was not unseen. Far above them, the gods watched in silence, their hands stayed by laws and oaths they had sworn not to break. For now, the mortals were alone. And in their solitude, they teetered on the edge of something far greater — and far more terrible — than they could imagine.

[socialworkdaily]

The Importance of Self-Care for Social Work Students

Let's face it—being a social work student isn't easy. Between classes, fieldwork, and late-night assignments, it's easy to feel stretched thin. Add the emotional weight of working with vulnerable populations, and burnout can feel like an inevitable companion. That's why self-care isn't a luxury—it's a necessity.

Self-care is not limited to just bubble baths and watching Netflix (although it should include those too). That's about building good habits to sustain your mind, emotional, and bodily strength. First off, setting boundaries: it's a permissible word when your cup runneth over – okay, no! Learn balance.

Take time to recharge. Whether it's journaling, meditation, a quick walk, or chatting with friends, find what works for you. And yes, sleep matters—no all-nighters can replace the clarity of a well-rested mind!

Remember, practicing self-care doesn't make you selfish—it makes you effective. You can't pour from an empty cup. By caring for yourself, you're setting an example of resilience and well-being for the communities you hope to serve.

So, pause. Breathe. Take care of you—you’re worth it.

[millionairematchblog]

Confidentiality Guard™: Elevating Privacy for Elite Dating on MillionaireMatch

In the realm of online dating, privacy is not a luxury—it’s a necessity. This is especially true for affluent individuals seeking meaningful connections on platforms like MillionaireMatch, where the stakes are high, and personal security is paramount. Recognizing the unique needs of its elite members, MillionaireMatch introduces Confidentiality Guard™, a groundbreaking feature that redefines privacy and security in online dating.

This blog delves into the importance of privacy in millionaire dating, how Confidentiality Guard™ works, and why it’s a game-changer for discerning singles looking to find love in a secure environment.

The Unique Privacy Needs of Millionaire Daters

Millionaire dating is unlike any other. The individuals involved often have high-profile careers, significant assets, or public-facing roles, making their personal lives especially vulnerable to unwanted exposure. For them, privacy is not merely about protecting their identity—it’s about safeguarding their reputation, finances, and peace of mind.

Key Privacy Concerns in Millionaire Dating

Unwanted Exposure: Public visibility of dating profiles can lead to breaches of personal and professional boundaries.

Identity Theft and Fraud: Wealthy individuals are frequent targets for scammers and identity thieves.

Selective Sharing: Members often wish to share personal details or photos only with trusted matches, not the general user base.

Safe Communication: Ensuring conversations are encrypted and secure is crucial to maintaining trust and discretion.

MillionaireMatch, as a pioneer in exclusive dating, understands these concerns and addresses them with a proactive approach: Confidentiality Guard™.

What Is Confidentiality Guard™?

Confidentiality Guard™ is MillionaireMatch’s proprietary privacy tool, designed to give members full control over their personal information. It elevates the online dating experience by ensuring members can connect without compromising their security or identity.

Key Features of Confidentiality Guard™

Private Profile Visibility: Limit access to your profile, allowing only approved members to view your details.

Photo Privacy Options: Choose to blur or hide your photos until you’re ready to share them with specific individuals.

Messaging Controls: Restrict messages to verified or preferred members, reducing unsolicited interactions.

Anonymous Browsing: Explore profiles discreetly with the Private Mode feature, leaving no trace behind.

End-to-End Encryption: Secure all interactions to prevent unauthorized access to conversations and data.

These features ensure that MillionaireMatch members can navigate the platform with confidence, knowing their privacy is protected at every step.

How Confidentiality Guard™ Enhances Privacy

Confidentiality Guard™ goes beyond basic privacy settings, offering robust tools tailored to the needs of millionaire daters. Here’s how it sets a new standard for privacy in online dating:

1. Complete Control Over Visibility

With Confidentiality Guard™, members decide who gets to see their profiles. This ensures that only serious and compatible matches gain access to your personal information, reducing the risk of exposure to unwanted individuals.

2. Selective Photo Sharing

Photos are an essential part of online dating, but sharing them indiscriminately can lead to misuse. Confidentiality Guard™ allows you to blur or hide your photos and share them selectively, adding an extra layer of trust to your connections.

3. Safe Communication Channels

Unwanted messages and spam can detract from the dating experience. Messaging controls ensure that only those who meet your preferences can contact you, keeping interactions focused and meaningful.

4. Discreet Browsing

Private Mode allows you to browse profiles without alerting other members. This is particularly beneficial for high-profile individuals who value discretion while exploring potential matches.

5. Advanced Security Measures

By encrypting all interactions, Confidentiality Guard™ protects members from data breaches and unauthorized access, ensuring conversations remain private.

Why Confidentiality Guard™ Matters for Millionaire Dating

Confidentiality Guard™ is not just a privacy tool—it’s a reflection of MillionaireMatch’s commitment to its members. Here’s why it’s indispensable for those seeking love in an exclusive dating community:

Fostering Genuine Connections: By eliminating distractions and ensuring safety, Confidentiality Guard™ allows members to focus on building meaningful relationships.

Protecting Reputation and Assets: For affluent individuals, privacy is directly tied to personal and professional security. This feature provides the protection they need to date confidently.

Catering to Elite Expectations: MillionaireMatch understands that its members have unique expectations, and Confidentiality Guard™ meets these demands with precision and sophistication.

How to Use Confidentiality Guard™ on MillionaireMatch

Activating and utilizing Confidentiality Guard™ is simple and intuitive, even for those new to online dating. Follow these steps to enhance your privacy:

Enable Confidentiality Guard™: Navigate to your account settings and activate the feature.

Set Profile Visibility Preferences: Decide who can view your profile and adjust visibility settings accordingly.

Customize Photo Privacy: Use the blur or hide feature for photos, revealing them only to trusted connections.

Restrict Messaging Access: Set criteria for who can message you, ensuring only serious inquiries reach your inbox.

Activate Private Mode: Browse profiles anonymously, exploring potential matches discreetly.

These tools are designed to provide a seamless yet secure dating experience.

MillionaireMatch: Leading the Way in Privacy and Security

MillionaireMatch has always been a trailblazer in exclusive dating, and Confidentiality Guard™ is a testament to its dedication to member satisfaction. By prioritizing privacy and integrating cutting-edge security features, the platform ensures that members can focus on building connections without fear.

With over two decades of experience, MillionaireMatch understands the unique challenges of elite dating and continuously innovates to meet the needs of its community.

Conclusion: Elevate Your Dating Experience with Confidentiality Guard™

In a world where privacy is increasingly difficult to maintain, MillionaireMatch’s Confidentiality Guard™ offers a sanctuary for those seeking love in an elite environment. By empowering members with control over their personal information and interactions, this feature ensures a safe and sophisticated dating experience.

If you’re ready to explore meaningful connections without compromising your privacy, Confidentiality Guard™ is the perfect solution. Join MillionaireMatch today and discover a new standard in secure, elite dating.

Are you ready to experience dating at its safest? Activate Confidentiality Guard™ on MillionaireMatch and take control of your love life with confidence!