#like sometimes i feel like im actually going crazy because how many times can you

[rubbership]

i would be much less lonely and so would a lot of other people if i could handle 1 on 1 conversations like a normal person

[hollow-vok]

Ohh im obssesed

[itzkawaiiduh]

watching u tweak over will horror stuff in the reblogs of my post is super entertaining

i know you’ve talked abt it before but if you have any thoughts about it i’m BEGGING that you share them

(leans on my car) oh nice to see you here what a strange coincidence (im sorry i love that post sm im giving u lots of roses ty for dealing w/ my insanity)

OKAY FIRST OFF MY GOD THIS IS SO LONG. IF YOU ACTUALLY READ THIS ALL GUYS I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH. I JUST HAVE SM TO SAY ABOUT THIS I LOVE THIS ASK SM

But yes! Hello, I shall !! I have a lot of thoughts, and I am a crazy fan of horror, so I incorporate some element of the uncanny into how I draw spectres.

As a horror fan, it makes me ECSTATIC to see people incorporate a more horrorish approach to the spectres, or how they draw something, but here I go! It's long, and a bit ranty.

(tldr: i call will biology boy, analog horror is based off of the alternates from the Mandela Catalogue, he cant look at himself in the mirror, the process when he duplicates is a lot like mitosis, i love seeing ppl talk about horror possibilities with Will, and in a William Wilson sort of telling, he has a doppelganger who is basically all his pent up negativity and deepest desires/everything he wants but can't have. the doppelganger mocks this)

Before we saw his duplication, me and many people denoted the process as "Willtosis" as a pun on the cell division. I nickname him "Biology Boy" because his abilities lean towards biology, so like the duplication and the mimicry. I have been sharing this one since about August, and I know quite a few people know me as "the one who draws Will's spectre all scary" So that I took the name "doppelganger" and based how I draw him off of the Mandela Catalogue, since Doppelganger is a stage of an Alternate! So all of my Will spectre art is based off of analog horror. If he can become a caricature, mold his face, change his features anytime he wants, why not make it realistic! I imagine after episode 120, he looks eerily uncanny/realistic, so I try to convey that in my artworks. Additionally, his pupils become a bit blurrier when he shifts into someone. In terms of mimicry, I imagine he can't look at HIMSELF in the mirror too long. He sees some doppelganger/someone that looks like him but is too good to be true. Is it everything he wanted? Dreamed of? It's right there, and he can't have it. He swears he looks different each time he looks at himself. I hope to write a fic where I explore selfishness with Will and the abilities he has with his spectre. He can have EVERYTHING HE WANTS. HE CAN TURN INTO MONTRESOR AND SAY THINGS IN MONTRESOR'S VOICE THAT HE WOULD NEVER SAY. Will wants validation from Monty, he will get it, even if it's empty validation. He will turn into Ada, watch her cry. CRY AS HER. Get all his emotions out. He knows what he is doing is wrong, but he knows he will never get it. So at one moment he is allowed to do what he wants: he has no roommate, so he will utilize the body mirror, and perfect his spectre. Sometimes, he gets too into the role and forgets who he is, or loses himself a bit in the process. Maybe one night as he is Montresor, his voice gets stuck as an exact replica of Monty's, and he panicks.

He gets fed up one day, and turns into a plethra of people. He shifts from person to person. Additionally, just imagine how CRAZY a Will crashout would be if he turned into Montresor, an exact copy but with something off in his face. (will crashout season 2 and will in a hall of mirrors when)

In terms of duplication, I imagine when he isn't bleeding out, his clone splits from the side of his body, like it's pain. He can feel it. The way his mind splits, the subconscious. his face contorting and the way his body is physically fine at the end, but the process is nauseating that he ends up falling to the ground while his doppelganger stands beside him.

Speaking of which, and it may have shown with the amount of times I have reblogged k3yboi's ask (which you can find here!) But in a William Wilson esque sort of telling, I imagine Will has a doppelganger who has everything he wants. The ideal, deep desires of William Wilson. And I imagine he is like Montresor, because Will loves Montresor, and looks up to him. And Will cannot have it.

It makes me ENTRALLED to see the concept of horror with Will be explored in the fandom, because I have been discussing it since summer of 2024. Additionally, it makes me a little shocked to see artists become INSPIRED with the way I draw this. I am genuinely baffled at this, but also grateful by such a thing.

Thank you for the ask, Rue!! I hope these satisfy or allow you to expand more on your thoughts! I will probably reblog this post if I ever think of more. If you ever share more of this, feel free to give me an @ ! I am not opposed to such a thing!

(OH MY GOD. THIS IS LONG. IF U MADE IT TO THE END ILY GUYS)

[sturnioloblogs]

Socs

Fem!reader x the outsiders gang!

Summary: You go for a walk, but will happen?

A/n: holy shit I am so sorry I have not been on here in months. That’s actually kind of crazy but I have recently been getting into the outsiders and I absolutely love them so this is a random fic about them… feel free to read or don’t I don’t really care. Also if you want more like this just request.

⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲

“Y/N! SUPPER!” Darry called my name from the kitchen. It was a mild night, not too cold not too warm, just the perfect temperature.

I jumped up from by bed to go eat supper, man i was hungry. Us greasers don’t eat in the cafeteria at school- or eat at all, stupid socs make fun of us and we honestly can’t be bothered to deal with their shit.

The dark beaten up hardwood floor was cold on my bare feet, which made me feel all tingly inside.

I turned the corner to the dinning room to find the whole gang here eating supper. Usually Johnny would eat at our house since his parents couldn’t care enough about him, but of corse he was always welcome at ours. Me and Ponyboy were the closest to Johnny out of the whole gang- well besides from Dally but he was older than us.

“Oh hey y’all” I said, sitting at the head of the table was Darry, and across from him was Twobit. There was an empty seat next to Ponyboy, which he probably left for me. We always sit next to eachother. Since we are twins it sometimes feels like we are the same person, but not exactly but close enough. And everyone knew that nothing could get between me and him, but of course we would fight we are siblings after all.

“Hey y/n, how was school?” Soda asked me with a soft smile. “It was alright you know the usual” I replied. Man did i ever hate school, always wanted to get outa that hellhole. I’ve only mentioned dropping out once to Darry, let me tell you one thing. It did not got well at all.

The soft chatter of talking was always nice to me, i never liked the silence, especially at dinner time.

“Darry can i got on a walk after supper? Please?” I asked. Everyone knew i loved walks, but they were dangerous at night, especially on a Friday. But i asked anyway.

“God y/n no, it’s too dangerous” Darry said with a straight face.

“Please i will bring my blade with me, i just need to clear my head” that was partially true, I had a lot on my mind recently and needed to let out some built-up stress.

“You are only going if one of the boys go with you!” Darry raised his voice. Now everyone had stopped eating to watched the scene that was going on at the dinner-table. It wasn’t uncommon for me and Darry to get into screaming matches, but right now i don’t even want to try.

The whole gang is very protective over me. I guess because im the only girl and well i’m not that big either. Only 5’1 and roughly 95lbs. Considering Darry Dallas and all the other Socs were well over 6ft it was a little scary not being to big.

“Ugh Darry please??! I don’t want anyone to go with me, i’ll only walk up the street and around the block” i Pleaded.

“Fine! just go, I’m not getting into another fight with you again.” He rolled his eyes. I gave him a small ‘thank you’, and got up from my seat to put the dishes in the sink.

⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲⟲

I had only been walking for about 5 minutes when i heard a loud “GREASER!!!” from behind me, i glanced over my shoulder. A blue mustang driving fairly fast towards me. Well oh shit.

I started speed waking, well almost sprinting now, hoping they’d lose interest or just wonder off somewhere else.

Before i could even think or process what was happening, i was ripped from my train of thought by someone coming up from behind me and pushing me to the wet concrete road. I couldn’t figure out how many there was but it was somewhere between 3-5.

I grounded and rolled over in pain before I felt a harsh punch to my left cheek. Screaming in pain, Warm liquid was oozing out of my nose. They were drunk. I could smell the awful smell of cheap alcohol on their breaths.

As they still had a hold of me another punch came out of nowhere, a brutal strike that slammed into my gut like a sledgehammer. Air whooshed from my lungs, and I tried to curl up into a ball, the sharp pain spreading through my ribs like wildfire. Laughter rang out around me, their voices rough and mocking, as one of them grabbed my shirt and yanked me upright. My vision blurred, but I caught a glimpse of their faces. Another punch followed, this time to my cheek- again and I tasted blood as my knees buckled. The ground felt cold and unforgiving beneath me, I clenched my fists, trying to steady the spinning world around me.

In the distance I heard a faint “Hey get the fuck away from her!!” It was the gang.

All the socs scurried away into the blue Mustang and drove off with a screech.

“H-holy shit! Help her!” Twobit yelled? I think it was him, I was still sorta out of it so i wasn’t completely sure who i was hearing.

Next thing i know i’m being shook slightly by Darry and sodapop. “Y/n? Can you hear me?” Darry asked trying to stop the blood from pouring out of my nose with his jacket. I slightly opened my eyes and above me i saw a spinning Darry Sodapop and Dallas. and the night sky.

“D-darry?” I coughed out and rolled to my side only to spit out the metallic taste of liquid. “Woah woa take it easy, it’s okay we’re here now..” Soda said while patting my back gently.

I got scooped up by Darry before everything going black.

When i starting to wake up again i heard faint whispers around me, and shuffling around.

I growned and slowly opened my eyelids to find 4 figures standing over me.

“Guys guys she’s waking up!” Ponyboy exclaimed.

I sat up quickly, almost to fast because i all of a sudden i felt a throbbing pain in my head and felt onto my back.

“Geez y/n take it easy don’t get up!” Soda said. Then everything came flooding back to my memory. The socs, getting jumped, and the pain.

“ay shit, it hurts” I said while a few stray tears fell down my face. I mean at least i was laying on the couch- not the cold concrete that i was recently laying on.

“Well i bet, you got jumped by a bunch of Socs. I told you to not go! but of corse you did anyway.” Darry said walking towards my head. I honestly couldn’t reply i was so fed up with everything i didn’t care.

“Darry give her a damn break!” Thankfully Soda stood up and said something for me. He always did.

[marciaillust]

hey, i hope you're doing great! i feel this may be unorthodox, but i really wanted to reach out to extend my engagement?— awe?— solidarity?— (some variant of those, anyways) with your most recent "workposting" art. i don't normally do this. I've maybe sent 3 asks in my whole life. there's no pressure to respond to this, as i mostly just wanted to cheer you on. also, I'm really sorry this is so long.

i only just recently landed my very first freelance art job, at a start-up company dedicated to making comics + DND inspired art content. I've always felt that "Its nothing to call home about", and so i really resonated with your feelings regarding your work for Brawl Stars. I felt kind of ashamed of my job, that its just a small start up— that I'm not enough and that i should be trying harder, or something like that. Specifically i resonated with your comment of "presenting brawl stars art feels like showing my anime girl oc to an art teacher" and i don't think i could have solidified any better.

Anyways. all's to say. I really found your work quite jaw-dropping. I was shocked when i read it was for Brawl Stars. I didn't know anything about it, but when i did some research i was even more amazed. they're really, really compositionally beautiful... i mean, i know its just "work" to you ultimately, but it really does feel lively, and everything about it makes it feel like you care. I think sometimes you're just able to tell when an artist genuinely cares about their work; about its end outcome. there's so many intricacies. and a lot of attention to detail. you kept the style that was necessary of you but i also can feel the warmth and the care of the artist behind it— its not corporate, or stale, it doesn't come across as "just work".

since you mentioned League, i genuinely do think it serves an equal purpose and weight to what League of Legends would produce. from a biased standpoint, i would actually value your work more. Its not even that its "more obtainable"/"more realistic" but that there's genuinely more feeling to it. Compositionally/artistically, yeah, League makes great stuff, but occasionally, the feeling or the sense of warmth and care from the creator of the art is lost along the way. I value seeing the artist within their own art a lot, which is why I've admitted to a degree of bias. either way. what you put out there is really gorgeous, and crazy impressive.

I know a stranger with a dumb, fandom-oriented art blog cant solve the self-indited art elitism (you and me both, man💀) and that you've already received plenty of love/reblogs saying similar things, but i wanted to extend my feelings anyways. Its really heart-warming, i guess. It brings me hopefulness, and deep adoration for the craft. I'm not very good with words. Anyways. don't undersell yourself. seeing your work meant more to me than you can imagine. I'm obviously nowhere near your skill level, but it meant more to me as an aspiration. i think that regardless of who you work for, your work is really valuable and downright incredible. because you bring that sense of warmth, care, time, and patience regardless of the media it portrays. and you're able to do that while being objectively talented— utilizing great compositions, colour pallets, shading, characterization, mood, etc. That is more valuable. That is much much cooler than working for Riot. imo.

Initially, i also wanted to ask you some questions about how you assembled your portfolio, if you went to school, (if so) what it did/didn't provide for you going into the art field, and just how you landed the job in general. But i respect you and your time, and wouldnt want to be a burden or anything. If you ever have time for it, i would love to ask them, among others, and we can chat in DM if you'd prefer. Absolutely no pressure. Im happy just watching from the sidelines. I dont anticipate anything from you to begin with! I just hope youll know how influential your post was to read & see, to someone like me!

Oh man. I. How. Where do I even start except

This is one of the most uplifting, touching and encouraging messages I received in my life. I read it thrice. And I still can't believe how full of love it is. This is such high praise, I want you to know I will cherish it and carry it with me for a long long time. It's not often that an artist gets to learn how their art is perceived, not to mention in such a positive light. It really means a lot to me.

It makes me so happy to hear that my work illustrations retain a piece of me that is visible to others. I myself can't see it, but I imagine my closeness to the matter at hand heavily impacts my ability to see objectively at all. There was a time where I was worried that work was overriding the me that makes my art mine, that I was becoming a corporate rendering machine and that what I did at work (the shape language and style) was bleeding into my personal art. There is a part of me that is now breathing easier after reading your message. I would love to answer any questions you have, it's the least I can do to repay you! Feel free to send an ask or even an email, I'll try to be as thorough as I can be with my answers. I wish you happy holidays! Take care! And again thank you so much for taking the time to write this message!

[ender-cloud]

GO HYDE GO! YOUR DOING AMAZING SWEETIE!!!

-lanyon, maybe probably

Tgs spoilers under cut

I’m not ok, the voices merging into Hydes own thoughts of insecurity is like the people are adapting to the new presence.

They realize this is more of Hyde yet dont have to do much because of how similar Hyde and Jekyll are.

Hydes thoughts of worthlessness are same as Jekylls before the potion and before the split, the feeling of worthlessness and mistake carried on through him.

GUYS GUYSSS THE GAYS!!!!

The stark contrast between mind Lanyon and actual Lanyon is interesting because it makes you wonder how Jekyll got that view of Lanyon in the first place.

Then you also have to consider that in this moment Lanyon is being vulnerable, he’s showing emotion because he truly cares for Hyde and wants to help him, but in university, when Jekyll probably made mind Lanyon because it was who he inspired to be, Lanyon was more closed off, having his walls up.

Lanyons closed off personality has back fired to make Jekyll have him almost becoming this enemy in his mind, someone who he always has to prove himself for when in reality Lanyon just wants him as himself.

Lanyon is showing that he just likes Jekyll for him with how he’s acting with Hyde, almost attempting to undo what he has done with embarrassing him and getting him out of this metaphorical jail of self doubt.

He is worried out if his mind for both of them right now and it would crush him to know that he may be a part of it but he also probably knows deep down that he is a part of it in some ways.

ITS THE RIBBON GUYS LOOK!!!! THE RIBBON FROM THE CHAPTER COVER PAGE!

It represents hope, security, and freedom in this moment, Lanyon pulling Hyde out of these thoughts is such an interesting story method and this will probably be what keeps Hyde from going to deep.

Lanyons hope will pull Hyde back if he needs to, Hyde wont get trapped in the mind (hopefully) if Lanyon is there and this is going to help Jekyll too.

Knowing that Lanyon is still there despite everything may help Jekyll, and having the proof of it will especially be great and this will probably be a big part in how to save Jekyll.

Sometimes i forget their British and then I see Lad and it all comes rushing back to me like “oh yeah, this is london”

He looks crazy and I’m all for it, finally fighting back instead of giving in, like he’s done over and over again, he’s sick of it and wont take it anymore.

“I dont hold this against you” now it is possible that Hyde is just joking but I wouldn’t be surprised if he holds it against Jekyll because they are his creations, everything they say and how they act is what Jekyll has thought up.

Yes, they are based on people in his life but they’re his interpretation of what they think of him. He doesn’t really know what they think but he’s scared of what it could be. (He’s so me guys/hj) but for real, i can relate to the mind people in Jekylls head.

I can think of times when ive put thoughts of what other people may think about me in my head even if it’s not true, im sure many people have had something similar to jekyll’s mind people. What Jekyll has made is a real thing put to a story and it feels interesting to see.

If Hyde squares up with the mind people though that would be pretty cool to see, finally working through the self doubting thoughts even if it is through a violent manner

[ilovefreedelahoya]

Yap time

The way beyblade deals with certain emotions is really good imo

Im mainly gonna focus on disappointment, persistence/determination, fustration, growth, pride, and many things like that.

Every blader wants to win, and when they don’t, they get fustrated. All bladers deal with it differently. Some(Shu) throw their beys on the ground and scream. Others(Valt) are filled with determination to try again and get stronger. Bell fell into a mini depression after Rashad broke Belia. Beyblade is also not scared to let the boys cry over broken beys, it’s their passion and spirit of their soul pratically, and it was destroyed while they had such high hopes of winning. This disappointment and frustration is similar to how people today feel about sports. Training and pushing their body to the limit just to lose and get mad at themself or teammates. This happens all the time in beyblade burst evolution, after Free left BC Sol, everyone went through a rough patch filled with disappointment and many quitting. Because of that, however, they were also filled with determination to get better, allowing them to become the number one team.

Teamwork and friendships. They’re really important in beyblade because friends help each other get stronger and teams work together to win. If there’s no harmony between bladers, they lose. If they fight, they’re going to lose. If they split, they’re going to lose. Beyblade teaches that sometimes you can’t always have your way and you need to work together and listen to each other to actually accomplish what you strive for. There are multiple instances within the series, Shu and Valt, Free and BC Sol, Basara and Bel’s group, Valt and Rashad, Aiga and his sister even.

Passion and limits. Aiga, shu, lain, Free, Rashad, and Phi are pretty good examples of being obsessed with power. All except Free had became corrupted with the want for power and ended up breaking people’s beys. I won’t add Bell to the list because he genuinely cared about the bey he accidentally broke, Ragnaruk and tried to help valt after damaging Valkyrie. I added Free because of his limits. He cared about blading so much that he had hurt himself on multiple occasions to be the best. In the manga he literally self harms to be mors serious and can we mention how he used to train with freaking boulders??? Now he’s better, in DB i haven’t seen him go crazy and he takes up meditation to focus instead of hurting (i talk abt it a bit more in my fanfic) Shu also pushes past his limits on multiple occasions that ends up hurting his shoulder. So beyblade says “know your limits” and “don’t pull a Free/Shu and get hurt because we’ll get sued”

But also the passion part that i got sidetracked from… it can be dangerous sometimes. Do i need to bring up Joshua’s obsession with Free? Sure, later. But Aiga’s passion compared to Valt’s passion is different. Valt wants to have fun, Aiga just wants to win. Along with Phi, Lain, Shu, Free, Rashad, etc. etc. but they don’t care about who gets hurt even if it’s themselves. Lain just fought to consume other people’s power. Aiga and Phi and Lain wanted to be number one so they broke people’s beys in the process. It’s really dangerous to lose oneself to that passion and it carries on to real life as you could genuinely get yourself or others hurt. For example, getting too passionate for sports and cheating just for a win like the Steriods incident in the olympics that couldve actually injured the athletes. So on and so forth…

With joshua, it’s not that deep. Bro jumped off a building cuz Free did. I mean yeah they had parachutes but are the two of them even licensed to use them???? Whatever it’s a cartoon and Joshua is like 20… HOWEVER FREE IS CANONICALLY 11 IN EVOLUTION AND BRO LIFTS BOULDERS?!?! I’M OLDER THAN HIM AND I CAN’T EVEN CARRY MY BACKPACK FOR SCHOOL- maybe i should start addinng boulders to my workout…

Pride. Mainly Free’s, Lui’s, and Bell’s. Do I need to say much other than it makes them underestimate others and makes them more upset when they lose because of the disappointment thing i talked about- Imagine having pride in your work where you won’t even look at another persons, then its forced in your face and you can’t get over how great it is? It really takes a blow on one’s self esteem and we can see that in Bell. Bell, the spoiled, powerful kid who was able to beat everyone until he couldn’t; until his bey had been broken and bursted by so many who were so much stronger. Just like Free getting bursted by Lui in evolution. They just got a huge reality check and blow to their ego that forces them to rethink nearly everything. “Maybe I’m not the best.” Free and Bell. “Maybe I should quit” Basara and Bell. or “Maybe there’s still a long way for me to go.” Almost everone in the show-

It all ties into the growth of the characters. Id say beyblade writes them pretty well considering at least half the characters disappear with the bext series. I mean when was the last time we saw Daigo and Ken- Evolution- which was four seasons ago… im glad we get to keep Free, but I also miss Cuza, Kris, Xander, Ken, Daigo, etc. Rantaro, our original loud blonde sidekick, hasn’t appeared yet in DB (then again im only halfway through-) but yeah, their characters are pretty good. Free went from bored to… still bored- but more respectful of other bladers. Aiga and Shu went through a whole corruption arc- Shu’s corruption arc actually allowed him to help Lain. (I think- i gotta rewatch) Valt became a lot more mature, he’s still a perfect amount of silly. Bell is a lot less spoiled, still spoiled, but less. Maybe a tiny bit.

Anyways that’s all my brain is able to do for now-

So yeah, beyblade is “not that deep” if ykyk-

thanks for bearing with me

pov me looking you dead in the eyes yapping about beyblade at 3 AM

[songspirits]

rating fanon portrayals of the outsiders boys

note: my guesses on the canon personalities probably arent even true lol this is my opinion

-

ponyboy curtis

5/10

sometimes the portrayals are really good!! but i hate that often, people portray him either as a moody brat or a weak baby. he is canonically a good fighter, especially after the fire, though he doesn’t like to. hes a loner, hes a reader, hes a pacifist, hes a good kid.

you have to remember that the outsiders is literally written in HIS POINT OF VIEW!!! ofc yes he’s a sassy and snarky teenager but he is also so intelligent and smart. hes a loner, but the gang would never shun his company. he has so much depth that a lot of writers often forget. hes a 14 year old kid with thoughts of a adult and can only do so much. thats what makes the outsiders so relatable to alot of people. its his intelligence that makes him and darry argue, because of how darry sees himself in ponyboy

but also on the other side of the coin ponyboy is a fragile character after the events of the book, because he is 14!!! but he has thoughts!!

i feel like people forget his good traits and only focus on the bad (and oh my goodness does this count for darry too!)

sorry for my rambles i just love his character so much :-(

darry curtis

7/10

besides fanfiction.net and like 30% of the fics on ao3 hes actually a solid portrayal most of the time, but tons of people forget that his relationship with ponyboy wasnt actually that batshit awful. sure theyd butt heads alot and go back and forth but they love each other thats why they did that. hes so much more than just an angry man who happens to be ponyboys brother.

hes a man who peaked in high school (IM KIDDING) and lost it all not because of his brothers but because of his parents. there was probably some strong resentment there for a while until they died. darrys problem or flaw is that he cares too much and his fear turns to anger. its love for sodapop and ponyboy that brings him back when he realizes his anger is doing more bad than good for his little brothers. It’s opening up and allowing his brothers in that helps his character.

that being said, people often focus more on his bad traits than his good traits. its a running theme in the outsiders fandom, i’ve noticed

sodapop curtis

7.5/10

highest rating i have on this list!! fanfiction.net outsider fics ive gotta say i actually just cant handle it so thats why it isnt a full 8 and ao3 is a 50/50

people put that hes soft but also forget that hes wild. hes batshit CRAZY. hes just as protective as darry and just as snarky as ponyboy. hes soft!! hes rough!! sodapop curtis is a dynamic character!!!!

johnny

5/10

ehhhhhh, most johnny portrayals i’ve seen are either really good or really bad. kinda ponyboy’s problem, being seen as weak. hes just a dynamic character who is allowed to be weak but also has so many strong traits about him. he is a frightened wounded animal to most but to the gang hes something more than that. also, snarky and ‘over’ johnny portrayals are great.

dallas

4/10

most portrayals i’ve seen are pretty good but its the same problem ive seen in all the boys— they only focus on a few traits dallas has (aggressive, tough, hardened) and stick with that. forgetting the youth in dallas winston and making his character honestly… less tragic?

imo the tragedy of the outsiders is the youthfulness in all the boys and how shitty situations couldnt make them more vulnerable, so i would love more of a vulnerable dallas in fics around the gang. another thing, people forget how much ponyboy really does mean to dallas. johnny and ponyboy were both his brothers and he’d did so much for the both of them precisely bc of that

two-bit

5/10

again.💔people forget how DYNAMIC these characters are!!! two-bit knows when to get serious for the love of god!!

steve

1/10

what portrayal. ☹️ppl dont write him enough and if they do its like one line #justiceforsteve

in conclusion

the outsiders fandom often have such good portrayals but only for one part of their character. this isnt to shame anyone or anything!! but this is just a helpful criticism ?? for any writers out there portraying the boys!! trust me i had to think abt this too lmao

[foundnthestars]

YOU BANISHED TGEM TO THE GAMBLING DINENSION??? SJAJSHDJKDBJGJGJSGJDGJD IM GONNA SCREAM. ohhh my GOD!!! This chapter is so GOOD. The announcement 'lucky number 11' foreshadowing that it's lottocron nine... I'm gonna explode into a million pieces. Dipper and the wormhole gun having matching breakdowns this chapter was also great!! Poor Dip feels so bad... It's not your fault king say it louder!

Also. Describe these two to me in as much detail as possible I want to draw them

CONSIDER THEM BANISHED!!

thank you SO much! these beginning chapters (i say even though i've written nearly 100k words at this point) have been soooo dialogue-heavy because these two still have so much left unsaid — which is fine! — but i really wanted to get them to a point where they can just bond and fuck around with knots and look at the stars together.

it took nearly 100k words, but war is over, and dipper's well on his way to confronting some of the Big Stuff that has had him isolating himself from stan. his realization that, "oh, shit, i actually don't blame stan as much as i do myself," hit fast and it hit hard. because, up until this point, dip hasn't really wanted to pay attention to any other feelings besides anger. anger is easy! but anger is often just sadness and grief wearing a disguise, and that mask doesn't always last.

HAHA, yeah, i had way too much fun peppering luck innuendos into the chapter and into the chapter announcement. thanks for noticing!! there are a fair amount of other moments that foreshadow events to come, but those are more subtle for sure, and probably only obvious to myself.

yup, dipper and the wormhole gun both had their moments. this kid literally was one more bad thing away from completely losing his shit, so it made sense to me that he'd just unravel. they've had absolutely abysmal luck with electronics recently but, yeah, guys, someone probably should've realized that they'd need to fuel that thing sooner or later.

ALSO, yes!! it's not dipper's fault!!! i'd have thrown myself at that button too! the whole thing was INCREDIBLY suspicious.

okay, wow, the fact that you want to draw something for this makes me so incredibly happy so i will try my best to deliver. i mentioned before that an event coming soon is going to change someone's appearance (pretty significantly), but here's how they look now!!

STAN:

scruffy beard (pretty short and stubbly, nothing CRAZY)

not yet a mullet-haver, but somewhere...close. he hates it. just picture something more scraggly and scruffy than what he has in canon. pretty similar to ford's in NWHS.

black trench coat, probably fairly worn in at this point. many pockets. dark-colored clothes overall. black pants. boots.

WORMHOLE GUN or RAY GUN in hand

sluggishly healing cuts on his forearms from having to cut off their binds in the car when they'd been kidnapped (not really super important but i'm trying to be detailed HAHA)

dark gray facial covering pooled around his neck like a scarf or around his face depending on where they're at.

backpack!!

DIP-DOP:

hair has definitely grown. it's slightly longer than usual and curly like in canon.

he doesn't have a mirror, his hat, or the patience to make sure his birthmark is covered up at all times — so it's more prone to peaking out through his hair.

sometimes has a jacket, sometimes not. up to your discretion!

black boots, dark-colored clothes, mainly. long sleeves and pants.

still sort of bruised from their initial trip through the portal. honestly they're both kind of beat up.

also backpack!

there's probably stuff im forgetting, but if you have questions lmk! honestly if you do decide to draw them imma lose my shit either way. i've never had someone draw fanart for one of my fics TwT

[soyaei]

hello!! would you be comfortable writing about high school nanami? just as you were about to confess your feelings to him, a series of bizarre events unfolded, derailing your plans and leading to unexpected consequences 🤩

Hey… Can i tell you something?

highschoolau!nanami kento x female reader

not proofread so please forgive for the grammar mistakes or some spelling mistakes.

Nanami was popular with the girls, and that includes you. Except… you were actually kind of getting the vip treatment from him. He was never really interested in talking with the girls who were squealing over him. The girls were crazy over him, and you were too. But you weren’t really showing that craziness of yours because you actually know what shame is.

To get straight to the point, you were Nanami’s classmate. Sure, nothing that special. But the thing is, Nanami’s english is… a bit bad, but not horrible. And you, you could say you speak english like its your mother tongue language. So maybe thats the reason Nanami wanted you to be his outside of school english teacher. A lot of his fangirls knew this and boy you never would imagine the day you would get so many jealous looks.

But aside from that, Nanami actually sometimes ask you to hangout with him without any special occasion, he claims it to be a thanks and all but in the inside, he just wanted to spend some time with you. He himself didn’t know why he was feeling it or knew how to explain the feeling.

Days turn by weeks, weeks turn by months and months turn by years. Your feelings towards Nanami has increased and you have been his very close classmate for 3 years now, and for that 3 years you had to fight the urge to yell your feelings towards him, to express how you really felt about him. But knowing that he was already tired of his fangirls and he probably hangout with you because he thought you might be the only girl that doesn’t have a crush on him, you stopped yourself.

But today was different, today… you were going to confess. You prayed that this wouldn’t affect your friendship and if he didn’t like you back, you at least hope that he wouldn’t avoid you.

The bell rings, it was finally time for lunch. You sat up, took you wallet and went to Nanami’s desk. “Hey, Kento, we should go sit at the bench near the field. I heard no one uses it! The surrounding there must be relaxing, i’m sure you’ll like it.” You said, not realizing that you forgot to breathe while talking.

“Okay then, im fine with sitting anywhere. I’ll just go to the canteen to get some foo-“

“Kento!!!”

Oh no, a fangirl! You’re definitely getting side eyed. The fangirl, named (someone you dont like), caged her arms with Nanami’s. Nanami immediately backed off and told her to not touch him without consent again. Kind of like scolding, typical Kento Nanami.

“Don’t be mad!!! When we’re dating, I won’t need to ask before touching you, so you have to get used to it!!!” When she said that, you clenched your fist, wishing you could just smack down her right here and right now.

Nanami, on the other hand, made a disgusted face. The girl was used to it so she wasn’t offended. She laughed it off instead. “Oh, Kento, your so cute when you do that face! You should do it to Y/n too, didn’t she just asked you to go to that bench near the field? No one is around there, you know. Who knows if she’s planning to lay hands on you.” You clenched your fist harder, you wanted to say something but Nanami calmed you down by patting you back. Seems like he knew you were about to say the most sassiest comeback to the girl but stopped you right there to not cause a scene.

Nanami gave you a sign to run out of the door together by looking at you and then the door. You nodded slowly and counted 3 to 1 with your fingers. As it reached 1 and the girl distracted by yapping about whatever she had in mind to say to Nanami, you two immediately ran to the door, getting out of the class and ran to the cafeteria. You managed to run without getting caught by a teacher or the principal. You two tried to catch up with your breathe when you two arrived at the canteen.

“Better hurry up before she gets here.”

You and Nanami were finally at your destination, the bench near the field that didn’t get much attention because it was a bit far away from the canteen. Making the place’s surrounding being peaceful.

“It feels nice here. I hope we won’t get disturbed.”

Nanami said. Nanami was calm but you were the opposite. Well, you were collected on the outside but in the inside you were really stressing out. You guys are alone, nows the chance! Your going to confess! You can’t believe it!

“Hey… Can i tell you something?” You asked to Nanami. He nodded to reassure you that you should continue. As soon as you were about to tell him you feelings, the girl from before and her gang came out of nowhere with phones recording both you and Nanami. For some reason, you felt extremely exposed. You could be naked right now and you wouldn’t feel this exposed and embarrassed.

“Hey, look at this guys! The girl who thinks shes so better than everyone because Kento is her ‘bEsT fRiEnD’ is going to confess her feelings!” (the name of someone you hate) said out loudly, catching some people’s attention while recording the scene with her phone.

“Does she think she has a chance just because shes Kento’s friend?”

“Probably, i wouldn’t test my luck if i was her.”

“Shes embarrassing herself.”

“Why would anyone confess empty handed? At least offer him some chocolate while at it.”

“He probably never liked her and is just her friend to do her a favor for being his english teacher..”

The whispers of peoples gossip was louder than anyone’s scream to you. You never felt this humiliated.

“Y/n, sorry.” Kento said out of nowhere.

“Hu-“ before you could even finish your sentence, Nanami grabbed your hand and pulled you to a near classroom that no one was in.

When you two arrived, Nanami closed the door and tried to catch up with his breathe.

"Nanami... I-" You tried to say something, but because you were out of breathe, you could barely let any words out of your mouth. "Y/n, please sit down first. No need to rush." Nanami said as he lead you to a seat.

When you finally calmed down, Nanami reassures you to continue what you wanted to say when you were rudely interrupted by (the name of someone you hate). "I... you know what, nevermind. I will tell you tomorrow." When you said, Nanami raised one of his eyebrows. But then he thought to himself, it was probably something important and you don't have the mood to say it anymore since who knows if that girl is still watching.

"All right then. I'll wait. It doesn't have to be tomorrow, you can tell me later if you want too." Nanami tells you.

The next day comes, at you two were at the same location you were at yesterday. Except, you could confirm that no one is watching since school is over. You and Nanami often walked to home together so he was fine with you wanting to stay here for a bit. "So, what did you want to tell me yesterday? You said you'd tell me it today." Nanami breaks the silence.

"O-Oh! Right, I almost forgot about that since the breeze is so calming today... heh...But anways... i want to... tell you... that..."

Oh god, here it goes. Your going to say it! You had to wait for the right moment for three years! Without realizing, your face was heating up. You wasted no time and stood up, facing Nanami and tell him what you have always wanted to say...

"Nanami! I like you! I... I have liked you even before we became friends." ...Silence.

"I...I thought-"

"He doesn't like you back, give up!" Oh. My. GOD. IT'S THE GIRL FROM BEFORE. WHY IS SHE HERE, HOW DID SHE KNOW WE WERE HERE, AND WHY IS SHE RECORDING!!!

"And... post. Heh, have fun getting gossipped tomorrow, Y/n!" (the name of someone you hate) then runs away. You feel so embarrassed right now. You don't want to listen to what she just said but what if she's right? What did Nanami wanted to say? He thought what? He thought that i was different from other girls in this school so i wouldn't like him in a romantic way?! Just as you thought that mindset to yourself. You took your bagpack from the bench and ran away, not realizing your eyes are already tearing up. Nanami just watched the scene unfolds as he was too shocked to do anything right now.

The next day arrives, and you tried your best to ignore the stuff people are saying about the confession you made yesterday. As if your not feeling worse that Nanami probably doesn't like you back and wouldn't want to be your friend anymore. Class was just normal, and in two hours it's already lunch break. You didn't feel like eating so you planned on just staying at the field. As you tried to calm yourself down and tell yourself that it's okay if Nanami doesn't like you back, someone pushed you shoulder harshly, but it didn't make you fall down.

"What's up lonely girly? What chu doing? And where's your closeeee friendddd" (the name of someone you hate) said to you in a high pitched voice and whining at the end of her sentence to annoy you more. What did you do? You... just... well... listened to whatever she wanted to tell you. You seriously had no energy to even make a facial expression or even care about your surrounding.

"Hey." A familiar voice interrupts. It's Nanami! What was he doing here? To also bully you? When you saw Nanami walking towards you, you immediately stood up and tried to walk away. Nanami grabs your wrist to stop you. And you just let it happen. You mentally prepared yourself to hear what he wanted to say.

"Y/n... I..." Nanami says nervously. (the name of someone you hate) took out her phone before you knew it to record the scene, expecting Nanami to say he didn't like you back.

"I-I-I... I like you too!!!" Nanami shouted out, not too loud but loud enough for the surrounding to hear it, to make sure that Nanami actually felt the same way. "If this is to not make people gossip about me, you can take it back." Now, because Nanami shouted out those four words people at school are interested to hear, a few students were watching you two.

"No...I... Y/n." Nanami said as he held both of your hands to turn you around and look at him. Cupping your cheeks, wiping yours tears with his thumb. "Y/n. I never had a friend this close in my life, Not to mention a girl. I was never interested in dating this whole time but you changed my mindset. When i first met you i just felt like i always want to be close with you. I didn't understand why i felt that way and now... when you confessed... I finally understand why. I like you too, Y/n... I like you too."

Everyone who was watching the scene cheered, well, almost everyone. (the name of someone you hate) and a few of Nanami's fangirls weren't happy. You can't believe this, he actually liked you back! You pinched yourself to makek sure you weren't just dreaming and Nanami chuckled at your actions. He pulled you in a hug, and finally... he did something that made the cheering louder and something that made your face heat up, he kissed you. Not too long since he's a shy boy with romantic stuff, and your glad since you also didn't want to kiss for too long since people were watching. No words could express how you feel right now, this was truly a dream come true.

[velvetvexations]

Since we're talking about forcefem, here're most of the forcefem-related asks I've had in my inbox, some of which are a few days old on account of technically going in the vexatious tag if not exactly kink asks. I wanted to answer one from today on it's own which I'll get to later but I wanted to get to the older ones and also get to a few of the others from today while I was at it.

i just saw a post where a trans guy was showing some messages where someone was (unconsensually) basically roleplaying forcefemming him. despite him telling them that he did not want that and that it was very much transphobic, and he atill got a message boiling down to "you're not a man, silly, you're a girl :D" and. to be honest. this was the thing that stopped the brainworms of "what if the whole concept of transandrophobia is actually transmisogynistic and i am entirely wrong" bc at least some of these people will just say the most bog standard transphobic shit to trans guys and not register it as transphobia. so why the fuck would they be right about anything transmascs experience also on that note thank you for being so outspoken in favour of transmascs getting to discuss their oppression. it's really helpful to see trans women stand with us here, especially when it comes to aforementioned brainworms

congratulations to that transphobe for creating a new transandrobro

the 'forcemasc isnt revolutionary' shit is the most annoying iteration of stupid tumblr discourse. like im going through the tag trying to read some horny shit and oh look. theres someone being stupid and hypocritical. in my horny tag.

people are getting tribalist about kinks and it's depressing

Every time people are saying that trans men & mascs cannot possibly fathom being objectified & fetishized, I think on all of the posts I’ve seen that did that exact same thing. And yeah, some of it might have been kink, so no hate no judgement I dabble in that tag too, but I’ve also seen “get in the dress” type posts that seem to be genuinely calling for trans men to be more feminine, untagged & in the wild, enough where I’m like — am I just imagining this? Like am I crazy? Am I missing something, or was that extremely detailed post about why I MUST stay feminine — or become more — for someone else’s benefit being 100% serious? And, again — if it’s kink, all the power to them, I love that for them, I even occasionally love that for me. But I have encountered enough people who were dead serious that I sometimes want no one but trusted friends & advisors to ever witness me again. And then I look at statistics & feel genuinely ill. And yeah, I’m gnc — and there’s the rub, because while I feel genuine joy being fem as well as masc, I want it to be a Choice, not something forced upon me.

people need to be fucking normal

Yh like ik a lot of shitposts don't have any tags but people have. Really gotta tag forcefem. I've blocked a large amount of people making these jokes + filtered their names n I still see it

I'm sorry, anon. <3

Fuck thank you so much for talking so openly about forcemasc. I’m so dumb I thought there wasn’t a name for that kink that I’ve been into for years, albeit my version is way more weirder. It would be like a… forcemascfem??? Like first it’s forcemasc and then it turns into forcefem and then right back to forcemasc…. And then back to- Idk my gender is weird and my kinky fantasy for that is weird

Cross as many boundries as you want, that sounds rad. Forcefem has a lot of infrastructure to jump off of.

“I’m doing a kink in a non kink way so it’s not kink blog!” Sorry this pisses me off It’s still a kink. Like. If someone made an I-suggest-BDSM blog and tried to claim it wasn’t a kink blog I’m sure more people would see how silly this is but because it’s the transfem approved virtuous forcefem they just let it slide??? Like. You are engaging in a kink and thats fine. You can say there won’t be anything explicitly sexual! But it will still be a kink blog because it’s a blog about a kink! A kink blog if you will! It doesn’t matter if you’re not getting off to it, it’s still a kink! That you are participating in! On your blog about that kink!

It SHOULD piss you off! It's extremely fucking scummy!

what the hell? for like one solid minute(longer than that but i like saying it this way) all the forcefem on my dash was tagged and i could blissfully not have to see it every other post and then just today i had to unfollow a buncha people for an assload of untagged forcefem :/ like im transmasc i think its understandable that i do not wish to see that anyway hope your day is goin well miss velvet

yeah it's praxis to not tag kink anymore

trfs are perfectly aware what the "force" bit means when forcemasc comes up in conversation

strange how that works

[sschizoid]

was wonderiiiiiiiing if you'd be up for any jimcurly hcs if they were in an au? I had so many idea and now that Im here Im blanking lmao- something fluffy please! Im dehydrated over here (there's so much toxic yaoi,- and don't get me wrong, im obsessed, but also- I want them to have some genuine moments yk TT_TT)

ohhh have I got LOTS of thoughts for you anon. wall of text inbound!

--

curly

curly has a naturally gentle, soft and nurturing personality. he's known jimmy for years, and despite his temperamental moments, he still welcomed him with open arms, even trusting him to live under his roof when he was down on his luck. simply put, curly loves jimmy, he always has. he just doesn't know where the line is drawn between them. but he's content with just being in the same room as him

curly's love language is acts of service, and preparing home-cooked meals is his favorite way to display that. he'll invite jimmy to a plate he's prepared, who he knows will most likely reject the offer, even though he's probably hungry, but he'll eventually cave in. he always does

they'll eat on the couch, their shoulders close together and knees idly knocking. curly will happily yap and get lost in a multitude of side tangents, while jimmy just listens, rarely chiming in. it used to drive curly crazy when he'd refuse to speak; he wanted to know what was going on in the other's mind so badly. but he's since accepted that that's just how he was. ever the observer, hardly the engager. and that was okay. he had enough thoughts to talk for the both of them

he often thinks about how jimmy was before everything, back when they were younger, before the world was big, and before his brain practically consumed him. it saddens him in the moment, but its fine, he doesn't dwell for too long. all jimmy needs is encouragement and love, and curly is happy to provide that. he would do anything for jimmy. and he wouldn't have it any other way

jimmy

jimmy wholeheartedly believes that he is incapable of loving or even caring about another human being, yet feels strange when in curly's company. he's always psyching himself out regarding this— his thoughts and senses aren't often reliable, his mind is always playing tricks on him, and he fucking hates labels. but curly? that motherfucker was an enigma

he'll never outright say it, but he enjoys when curly touches his hair or places a hand on his shoulder and gives it a quick squeeze. small notions that aren't overbearing, but still communicate "I'm in your corner". it's comforting, those touches that, if placed by anybody else, would probably irritate the fuck out of him. but coming from curly, they were bearable. more than that, they were welcome

one of the traits he likes about curly is that he doesn't helicopter. he knows how to speak jimmy's language, or at least, does his best, and jimmy likes that. but at the same time, curly doesn't enable. doesn't let him do stupid shit if he knows it'll be harmful or make him upset. and god fucking damn does it piss jimmy off in the moment, because who is he to criticize how he lives his life? but the morning after, he's more often than not begrudgingly appreciative that curly is stern enough to reel him in and keep him grounded. its a careful balance, one they've mastered well over the years

sometimes, and only sometimes, does jimmy think about holding him. when his brain is just a little bit calmer, often after a really good talk or meal. he usually lets those thoughts perish, but sometimes, he starts to fantasize. not even about sex, just about having a normal fucking domestic life. being in love, being loved, being intimate. he'll catch himself looking into curly's eyes and try to imagine some sort of future, one where he gets his shit together and learns to tolerate being alive. one where curly can say he's proud of him and have a reason to actually mean it. a nice house, a different city, maybe they'd even get a dog. the idea always feels like a far away pipe dream, but fuck if it isn't nice to think about, at least for a little while

--

WHEW sorry i got kinda carried away with this one, i just have so many feelings about them. also this is probably more of an, uh... melancholic fluff lol but I hope you like it anyway! ( ; w ; )

[thesophistiicate]

im not trying to act all high and mighty, im just genuinely confused by this... i truly dont understand girls who allow themselves to be put in degrading situations the same as the last anon? surely its glaringly obvious that man just wanted a body to use? i know i sound so mean but im genuinely actually confused whenever i hear or read girls talking about experiences like that i find it very hard to understand what would make them give the most undeserving men access to their bodies and souls like that... i can kind of understand if you sleep with a man for the first time and he treats you badly after but what i dont understand is going back again and again and expecting a different result. at that point maybe youre a little to blame as well? why would you even sleep with someone who youre not even in a relationship with? im just very lost i thought by now we all know better than to give just anyone our time. i see this even in my girl friends, theyre all so beautiful and intelligent yet they date terrible men that shouldnt even be allowed to breathe the same air as them and when they inevitably cheat or hurt them they genuinely get heartbroken and then they start to tell me about things the man has said to them and show me their text conversations and in my head im like "hes telling you right there in that message that he doesnt care about you..? what did you expect..?" sometimes it feels like girls get into situationships and relationships just to get themselves hurt on purpose because, and this is gonna sound so mean but i dont know how else to word this, but theres no way people can genuinely be this blind and stupid. i just find it so hard to feel sympathy for girls who numerously get shown and told theyre only being used for sex and still stick around for a different outcome. is that what love supposed to be? am i the one with the twisted understanding of love? am i missing something? i hope im not coming off as heartless or conceited, im genuinely confused i just dont know how to express or word it well

i'm happy to hold space for expressing thoughts imperfectly or even harshly, so long as we are willing to find understanding and not stay stuck in judgement 🤍 i would say the challenge for you here is learning to stay out of judgement (it is all right to acknowledge that's not how you would act, but attaching value statements and labels like 'stupid' don't help you be kind and don't help anyone else thrive either), and leaning into empathy (finding understanding when someone acts in a way you wouldn't, rather than judgement and frustration).

i say this as someone who used to be really judgemental, not to tell you off, but because it's so good for the soul to learn this growth. judgement and labels are easy, it's far more difficult to build the emotional intelligence to hold space for nuance and complexity, to extend compassion and nurture even when somebody is making imperfect decisions.

i think that you're someone with a really good level of self worth and self respect who cares about others too. that's so amazing! the best thing you can do is continue to hold your standards and lead by example. you aren't the one who has it wrong at all. healthy, respectful relationships aren't like this! keep your standards high, show your friends examples of high standards. as much as it will feel like they aren't listening, sometimes a simple, fairly neutrally toned: "wow, you deserve better" or "geez, i wouldn't put up with that" or "that's not normal" will linger and have more long-term impact than you realise.

i know it's easy to look in from the outside and say, can't you see it?! he just sucks!! or to look at the end of a crazy story and be like, girl, there was SO many red flags wtf!! (lol me at my past self!) but when you're in the middle of it, it's actually really hard. these people are master manipulators and they know how to keep their victims hooked. love bombing, mixed signals, disrespectful treatment to lower self worth... it's a wild ride inside the storm, you simply cannot see clearly because they are committed to obscuring the view.

at the core women get themselves into these situations because of low self worth. it's why i talk about it ALL THE TIME, it's SO CRUCIAL. when you don't value yourself, you put up with being disrespected. the more you are disrespected, the lower your self worth drops and the more bad treatment you accept. it's a toxic cycle. it's the exact same dynamics as in any abusive or domestic violence scenario (even if the relationships aren't abusive and he's just casually disrespectful - that is the beginning of abuse), and it's pretty well researched why women stay, how they get in those situations, why they find it difficult to leave, why the cycle keeps repeating with new partners. i'd highly recommend researching it if you want to understand it better. every woman should be educated on this topic.

you are right to some extent: if you want to get out of the cycle you do have to take responsibility for your own behaviour. you have to ask why you're accepting being treated that way. what led you there. why you are obsessing over their behaviours but not questioning your own.

but to confront all this is very difficult and painful and often related to trauma and neglect. yet another reason why so many can't escape the cycle, to face all of that can be more painful than putting up with a shitty guy who just wants sex without commitment... the crap treatment is easier to face, until it isn't.

it is a form of self-harm, a kind of self-destruction as a way a broken mind and spirit tries to cope with trauma. to end the relationship would be to limp out and finally confront how broken you are. when you stay in it you can stay delulu. it's a form of escape.

of course, to a healthy person it doesn't make sense. why would anyone ever willingly hurt themselves? and yet, it's a psychologically observable phenomenon and unfortunately the solution and path to healing is far more complex than just not doing that or getting into those situations. if only!!

but the way out DOES involve making a decision that you deserve better. which is why we need to keep talking about these things, bringing them to light, being compassionate, creating safe spaces for women in these relationships to talk about what they're experiencing without judgement, shame, being called stupid or asking for it etc 🤍

i could speak for a long time on this, but i'll leave it there for now... it's all right to not understand it. i actually think that's a good thing in a way, it means you're in a good place. but certainly if you really want to understand it, the research is there!

[stilljuststardust]

Heyyy! It’s parrot again! And today I have two related questiones!

Both have to do with the information that all one needs to do to manifest is desire and live in the imagination/daydream.

1: if kids often truly believe the things they are playing or imagining to be real how come they don’t accidentally manifest them?

2: i daydream pretty much constantly and have been affirming out the wazoo and i am going to continue persisting and believing and all that jazz, but i have yet to see the results in the 3D(i am confident they will come; im just getting a lil impatient lol)

Thanksssss! Have a nice day :3

Hi parrot!

1:

Children can manifest, sometimes they do (I did). However, they don't usually manifest their play pretend because on some level they do know its just that, pretend. I remember having tons of crazy beliefs as a kid but my mindset was almost always "if I wish really hard maybe it will be true" instead of actually assuming so. So, unfortunately, I didn't get a pokemon on my birthday.

Children aren't stupid and I do believe that they know they're playing pretend.

However, there were times I did apply the law as a child.

This story is humiliating but whatever, I was a child.

When I was a kid I was really into lip sync battles (now an source of intense shame lmao) and every damn day I practiced because I was CONVINCED it was going to happen at some point for me.

When we were leaving town to meet my grandparents in a more populated area I was like, welp this is it, clearly I'm going to do it now. My mother was like, why do you keep talking about that I promise you there aren't any where we're going.

I didn't listen because I knew she was wrong. We arrive and immediately go out for dinner to a random restaurant, we walk in and in big neon letters a sign says "lip sync battle next door".

My mom literally thought I was crazy the entire week leading up because she had no idea why I was so adamant that when we got there I would be in one.

Why did this manifest and my pokemon didn't? Because when I was practicing for it I did it as if it was real. I knew it was going to happen and I didn't even stop to think about when or how all I knew was I should have a song ready.

I didn't budge because I knew I had it. I knew it was going to happen no matter what.

I wasn't day dreaming, I was practicing. I wasn't hoping, I was commanding.

2:

I know many people refer to the 4D as "imagination" but this doesn't mean play pretend or day dreaming, what they mean is your internal world.

Yes as a child I was imagining it happened but I did so from the assumption that what I was imagining HAD to happen. I didn't consider it play pretend I considered it practice.

People literally thought I was dumb but I didn't stop to consider there opinion because I knew it was mine.

When you imagine the image of what you want don't think "I hope I'll get this" think "I already have this"

I think we often unconsciously undermine ourselves because we're still thinking as if it isn't here.

Asking where it is or telling yourself it's not here yet are still affirming against it.

Affirmations are just thoughts you repeat, if you're ALSO repetitively thinking against what you want then you are ALSO affirming against it.

Think as if you have already manifested it, as if having it is cold hard fact. Yes it may feel unnatural at first but that doesn't matter.

In my story from before, I didn't ever stop to wonder why I hadn't been in one yet because I knew that it was happening no matter what so timing was irrelevant to me.

Think about who you'd be if you had it, how you'd see the world, what you would think, then think as that version of you.

Personally I like to ground before I do anything because it helps me to think of it as real.

Take a look at these, i think they'll help you:

Mental diets aren't just getting rid of negative thoughts

This one's really good

Loa checklist

[thevulturesquadron]

THAT LATEST EPISODEEEE

Okay okay I have many thoughts and I apologise if this is gonna end up very incoherent and disjointed but I NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT BECAUSE AHHHHH

You know what the episode did very well (the writers, man)? Make the audience feel like they're taking crazy pills. There's this almost cognitive dissonance from the rest of the squad (Charles esp) with the way they say and behave because as Rogue stated "none of you were there". This is SO good in showcasing that you can be as understanding as you want, be literally a part of the same group... and STILL it's not enough because you didn't have the (in this case unfortunate) exact experience. The previous episode is a great addendum to this. The rest of humanity's (majorly the big wigs of course but you get what i mean) scared and at worst callous and apathetic reaction to the genocide. They're not scared because of what happened to those mutants, they're scared because of what Magneto would do in retaliation. Cooper is another example of how much actual experience can wholly change a person. She's not a mutant... but she was THERE. Erik and Rogue were there... right in the middle of it. How does anyone expect SOMETHING to not happen. You know who else saw what happened? Us, the audience. The latest episode felt frustrating and cathartic in the best way. It felt like decades of repressed righteous anger spilling in the most messiest manner, but it's OUT there. It needed to be said. Rogue's rant at the group before joining Erik, Erik's iconic "SHUT UP" line (yo lemme tell you istg i said the EXACT thing after that drivel Charles said). That's another thing that was so well done. Showcasing that no matter how well meaning Charles is... sometimes it feels like the dude's not LISTENING (Erik talks about watching a child be eviscerated in front of his very eyes, and I feel like all he's getting from others is an 'aw im sorry thoughts and prayers now can you please CHILL out') and does need this slap in the face. And the consequences keep piling up (the last big thing being what happened to Logan). Nothing will ever be normal and it's sad and scary and I'm very much looking forward to what comes next.

On a small note, showing how Roberto's decision was unsure with him trying to apologise to Jubilee and then his shocked reaction at her not wanting to hear him was so sad. It truly felt like a boy who only realised how massive of a consequence he's facing but just wanting his friend back.

I'm pretty sure I had more things to say and a more thoughtful way of saying them but anyway... 10/10. VERY ANGERING AND FANTASTIC. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE LAST EP!!!

HI!!! ✨SAME!! 💜💜💜💜 thanks for coming in kicking the door down and shouting my way cause I needed that!! My brain has been stuck on a loop with the events in E9.

I love, love, love this episode exactly because of the strong emotions it made me go through. To see the division, to see where everyone stands, to see what matters most to them: what they are going through or an ideal? It. Was. So. Good! It was skin itching to see it at the same time. Each episode has continued to take me by surprise and go beyond my expectations.

I love how well the writers have been able to portray the difference between people who have been through horrible events, and those who have seen them ‘on screen’. Remember in episode 7 when Amelia said 'a survivor is the last thing I’d wanna be.’? Now it resonates even more than ever. It’s poetry. And yes, Cooper isn’t just someone who ‘saw it Magneto’s way’. No. She was one of the perpetrators caught in the middle.

So that when Scott goes around saying ‘Magneto is responsible for this.’ When Wolverine is out for blood - it should make you angry cause it feels like the crimes that Bastion has orchestrated are secondary to the X-men's agenda of 'righting a wrong'. Bastion is just a battle, another villain they need to defeat. But the call was coming from inside the house all along.

I’ve seen people online saying that this episode did Magneto dirty. But I think it’s the opposite. Magneto had always been capable of awful things in his pain and anger, but that’s not the point the writers are trying to make. The name of the episodes is ‘Tolerance is extinction’ - the whole point is to put the viewer in the uncomfortable position of understanding Magneto’s anger, but knowing his actions have big consequences, all the while making you lose your mind at how backwards and ignorant Charles' side seems. People are dying because ultimately his dream is more important than the people the dream is made for. And Rogue and Magneto are calling him out on it. The beauty of it is that Charles is preaching an ethical way where everyone matters, but how entitled and arrogant he must come across when everyone else around him is just ‘sacrifices he is willing to make’ for the sake of an ideal. It’s beautiful and awful that the cry for battle and survival is coming from the mouth of those that have nothing left but violence in them, while the champions of the just offer shackles and tell those that suffer to endure more for the greater good.

Yes this episode is supposed to make people angry and confused. And I think it succeeds.

If there is one less positive thing to say about the show, it's the pacing. You can feel that they were forced to put everything in just 10 episodes because there are a lot of moments throughout the show that are either missing or rushed. (For ex. in this last episode I would have liked to have scene with Rogue and Roberto on Asteroid M, in a similar fashion to what we got for the two X-men squads; just a glimpse at how things are impacting them instead of immediately seeing them in a 'villain guards' roles.) But I am not going to hold it against the show; from what they've delivered it reads a lot like cuts that they needed to live with.

[aemondtargaryen]

HELLO i haven't finished yet the netflix show but what are your thoughts on young Úrsula? I read the book a couple of times but it was looong ago. I remember Úrsula as someone resigned to the inevitable. I certainly don't remember her so deeply in love with José Arcadio, and even less willing to have sex. I don't remember her as a sexual creature at all, despite the book having no problems getting into that.

I didnt like her that much the first part but i think her characterization improved a ton when she got older and switched actresses.

Also do you think they managed to achieve that magical realism feeling? Personally I don't think so and that makes me a little sad but despite all it was definetly a good show. Maybe the bar was too high probably.

I loved Aureliano though! Adult Aureliano was very Aurelianesque 10/10. Amaranta and Rebeca were excellent too!!

Im finally on my laptop yay!! Also when I got this ask I hadn't yet finished the show so now I can give a better answer (you probably also finished it too anon because I took years to answer lmao)

I actually liked young Ursula. She felt like I always imagined her, more than resigned, resilient. She always found a way to make things go her way, even when her husband wasn't present, she always pushed through (which is a pretty common situation in latin american households, women many times carry the burden of the house but in a tacit manner and thats how I think Ursula was portrayed). About the sex thing tbh I never got that reading from her. There's definitely some characters whose stories revolve more around sex but thats not what her story is about. However I feel she loved her husband all through her life and it shows in differents manners than just steamy sex scenes like Rebeca's.

On the magical realism I think you're right, some scenes could be perceived as being only inside the character's head for non book readers, when the purpose of magical realism is that they really are experiment those crazy phenomenons in their reality. I think they shied away a bit from it but many of the more iconic "magical" moments are still yet to come so there's hope.

Now my real pet peeve was the delivery of some of the lines. I think theres a lot of the dialogue that should have been said with more force, specially young Jose Arcadio and Ursula. They felt so calmed when I always imagined them if not yelling at least angry. Latinos are usually louder, or at least we venezuelans are. Maybe colombians aren't but I would like to think we aren't that different, so the flatness of the dialogues felt off sometimes. This too goes for the narrator.

Aureliano!! Aureliano IS 100 años de soledad so there was a lot of pressure both on the writers and the actor. Physically I think he's perfect. Also hot enough to pull that moustache lmao. Again I had some problems with the delivery of some lines at first where he just seemed too passive, but as soon as he became the Colonel everything changed (and maybe that was the idea now that I think about it). Although I gotta say the last couple of episodes made me realize that he kinda became a terrorist in the end and I hadnt caught up that in my readings (which were a lot, ive read that book like 5 or 6 times) and in my mind he always fought for justice but now seeing it again I can see he was just as corrupted by violence and power as Arcadio in the end. It did besmirch my perception of him a little, because it reminded me of whats going on currently in Colombia and the armed conflict and how he would fit right in with people from groups like the FARC. Sidenote: I think his relationship to Remedios was done masterfully, we know she's a child but the scenes were carried in a way no child actress had to be intimate with the actor.

Amaranta was great, I love how they managed to show Amaranta's two sides, the conniving vengative damaged soul, along with her maternal, calm, also damage soul lmao. Rebeca I think is the only casting that looked completely different to how I imagined her physically, but the actress did a good job portraying her.

All in all I think it was a really good adaptation, particularly for such a loved book and one with really high expectations. I think it was done in the best of moments because it was done with a high budget but with colombian actors and setting (looking at you Casa de los espiritus). Theres some things that could be improved but most of them are personal preferences. Its a really good show and I can't wait for season 2!