#like she focuses way too much on what's desirable/acceptable and what's not and that's part of what holds her back

[tvrningout-a]

clutches my heart and weeps!! as i realize that while being around other spider-folk like her is a relief bc they understand the stuff she's dealing with, it also supports the idea that chiyo is absolutely replaceable and that people could drop her if she becomes as difficult to handle as she imagines she is. it just makes her more determined to push down aaaaall the stuff she considers " ugly " and deal with her traumas and uncertainties on her own. and there are people who can probably see it happening bc despite the fact that chiyo is skilled at playing pretend, these people have done the same kinda stuff and recognize the signs. in this essay i will--

[ambrosiagourmet]

I've been thinking about Laios' succubus lately. Mulling it over a bit.

Because I've seen these pages brought up a fair bit, but almost entirely in the context of shipping (on all sides, really). And I really want to understand what they are doing for the story beyond that.

When I went back to reread the scene and section, a few things caught my interest: the way Laios responds to both forms of his succubus, the themes of the volume the chapter is found in, and the other events of the chapter itself.

So let's dive into those three things, and what I think they say about the succubus scene's purpose.

Laios is never fully frozen by the succubus

So. If you compare Marcille and Chilchuck's reactions...

to Laios':

-

There is a difference. Sure, the basics may look the same once it turns into Scylla Marcille, but even then, it functions differently.

Chilchuck and Marcille are completely frozen once they catch sight of their succubus. Izutsumi, as well, isn't able to look away, and completely freezes up once her 'mom' starts talking to her. As Chilchuck describes, "just looking at them makes you unable to move."

And yet, Scylla Marcille has to actively convince Laios to comply. He even looks away from her at one point!

Laios accepts this succubus, but he is never actually helpless to it in the same way. Taken in? Convinced? Sure, at least enough to let things happen that he probably should question more than he does. But magically compelled? Not really. Not the same way as everyone else is. So that's interesting. But let's move on for now.

2. Volume 9 is all about drive and desire

I don't often look at chapters within the context of the volume they are included in, but I think there's some really fun things to be found with that perspective in mind.

For one, volume 9 starts with an exploration of what desire brought Laios to the dungeon:

And ends with a question of what desire brought Laios to the dungeon:

It's also very concerned in general with questions of why people do what they do. Why they are in the dungeon, why they are with the people they are with, why they stay, what they fight for.

In addition to Laios, we see it with Marcille...

Izutsumi

Kabru

and Mithrun

Hell, we even get it for the demon!

It's certainly not the only volume concerned with desires and motives, but it is particularly focused on these ideas.

The succubus scene fits quite well into the ongoing question about desires, especially Laios' desires. It is even placed at an interesting spot within the volume. The volume is six chapters long, and the scene takes place at the start of the 4th chapter. It's almost smack-dab in the middle.

With all this in mind, it is interesting that, with both versions of the succubus Marcille, it's not totally clear which parts of her Laios is rejecting.

The first version of Marcille looks human, but Laios attacks when he identifies her as a monster. The second Marcille looks like a monster, but he seems to believe that she is the real (human)(ish) person that he knows. So is he rejecting the monster at first, and then accepting the person? Or is he rejecting humanity and only interested in the monstrous?

Something to consider as we look at the next point...

3. the rest of the chapter is a seduction, too

This is one of those things that might not be apparent on a first reading, but is crystal clear on a revisit. We see the succubus try and charm Laios over 7 pages, and then see the Winged Lion do the same thing for the next 19.

Much like the succubus, it offers the mingling of monsters and humans. Much like the succubus, it offers belonging.

(and this is the point where I absolutely must also link this post by fumifooms on the succubus, which has some great ideas on how the scene is informed by Laios' trauma and desire for acceptance!!!)

But, back to the point. The Winged Lion wants to feed on Laios just as much as the succubus did, and it uses similar strategies to try and make that happen. Though this chapter isn't really the turning point for the next Lord of the Dungeon (it is Marcille who will, eventually, become the Lion's next victim), it certainly behaves like it is.

Laios is convinced. The succubus gets its meal. By the end of the volume, the reader begins to understand how concerning his desires are. Together, it is all very good at building up that sense of dread and pending disaster, as we see exactly how and why Laios might just fall into the Lion's open arms and bring about the end of the world.

-

So that's the three things I noticed. But there's still something I want to touch on by looking at the way these observations overlap, and what they reveal, together.

As I said, by the end of the volume, you can feel the tension growing. Just as Kabru and Mithrun do, you look back for an answer to the questions that have been built, chapter by chapter: why is Laios here? Where will his loyalties fall? This chapter, and scene, seem to prove the inevitable truth: he will choose the monster, of course. He will choose the seductive, easy power of the Winged Lion.

But the details of what actually happens tell different story: one in which the Lion is wrong.

First, as a reminder - even in Scylla Marcille mode, the succubus never fully entrances Laios. It convinces him, but it doesn't have him completely under its thrall.

Similarly, in the dream, the Lion does convince Laios to embrace the world he is offering. But even within that dream, Laios continues to ask questions that will be vital to him later. It is because of those questions that Laios comes to a new understanding about Thistle.

And it's this realization that he cites later as part of his reason for refusing the Lion's offer.

He is thinking through things the entire time, just like he continues to question the succubus even after it turns into Scylla Marcille.

Laios also expresses an interesting reason for why he wants to see the future of this world. He's not just invested because it would mean people liking what he likes, or him getting to spend time with monsters. The thought that comes immediately before his acceptance is about what he wants for monsters and people.

I don't think it's a coincidence that this statement - "we're living beings that share the same world, but all we can do is keep killing each other" - can apply to the various humans races just as much as it does to humans and monsters. The thing he is thinking about here isn't just a matter of his personal daydreams. It's an idea that underpins every conflict in the story.

Laios caring about how people as well as monsters in this manner is something that the Lion gets wrong every time. Even at the end, he still frames Laios' desires entirely around hating people and loving monsters.

The Lion has heard him express an opinion about the future of the world! It happened right there in the dream, right in front of him! He just didn't take it seriously, and didn't view it through any lens other than "Laios likes monsters more".

He's convinced that he understands how to get to Laios. Maybe the Lion can't truly see everything, or maybe his vision into everyone's deepest desires has made it hard for him to realize how much choice still matters. That people can, and do, choose which desires to act on, and how to act on them.

Whatever the case, he's wrong about Laios, and the story shows us this over and over again.

After all, look at how the succubus interaction plays out:

A monster uses Marcille to appeal to Laios...

He realizes that something about the situation is wrong, and rejects her.

It changes strategies, and makes new offer: to turn him into a monster.

It also assures him that his friends are, or will be, taken care of.

He accepts. Or rather, allows the monster to have its way with him.

But Laios is not as helpless as he initially appears, and what the Lion thinks is a successful seduction also contains the seed of an idea that will allow Laios to later resist him.

We even get to see Izutsumi playing a similar role in both instances, as the one person fully able to take action in the face to the illusion.

The story lays out what is going happen, and then explicitly tells us that the demon and the succubus are thematically related.

The chapter performs a great sleight of hand here - everything about it seems to indicate that Laios is doomed give in to the option to have his deepest desires realized. But if you look closer, it also contains the evidence that he won't. There's a lot more going on for him.

Yes, he still falls for obvious tricks. He is still extremely into monsters, and he still doesn't feel like he fits in with other people. He may, deep down, crave to surrender to the monstrous - to let it absorb him. But he questions more than he seems to. He considers more than people realize. He cares so much more than anyone gives him credit for.

And I think this is part of why we see the succubus called back to so many times, especially with the wolf head addition to his Monster Form, which he specifically added due to his encounter with the Scylla Marcille.

This all stays with Laios. It doesn't just foreshadow the path of the story, it is fundamental to how and why he walks that path. It's not about him choosing monsters, and it's not about him choosing people. It's about how he considers both, and cares about both.

And it's about the forces that think they already know his answer. Mithrun and Kabru. The Winged Lion. The succubus.

It's about how they are wrong.

[sugar-grigri]

Crazy theory, but since I don't really read them, I don't know if it's ever been mentioned before.

I've already talked about this urge to discover the demon of death. So much so that fans see them in every new character introduced.

We know that Pochita punctuates both the birth and death of demons with his chainsaws.

I've always been surprised by the way Pochita calmly took hold of Makima, allowing Denji to knowingly save her by recommending that he give her love

Just as I'm surprised by Fami's interest in separating Chainsaw Man just as Yoru is stubbornly intent on revenge

How can these three horsemen of the apocalypse have so much interest and connection with a single demon?

We already know that Fujimoto has opted for the metaphorical, choosing the instrument designed for childbirth: the chainsaw, as the keystone of his story.

Chainsaw Man is intrinsically linked to birth and death

Denji's rebirth alone is linked to death having been cut up as well as Pochita?

Demons are born out of fear of one thing, so I know it might be strange that Pochita, representing chainsaws, represents death and isn't the chainsaw demon.

But two things: firstly, the impostor is actually the real chainsaw demon.

Fujimoto likes to undo our first impressions, so I find it absolutely INCREDIBLE that Denji should be the impostor from the start, the false Chainsaw Man in a part 2 that focuses on identity.

Secondly, how can simple chainsaws have so much power? I mean, sure, they're scary, but how can they have so much power as to be able to wipe out demons? Why should it be the chainsaw demon who's capable of this, and death remains crouched in the shadows?

This would also explain his promiscuity with the other Knights of the Apocalypse.

The demon of control wanted to play with Pochita - death was the only thing she couldn't totally control, the only thing she aspired to be on an equal footing with.

If Pochita understood her so well, it was as the fourth knight of the apocalypse. If Makima considered him her equal, it was because she couldn't control a demon she knew to be of her own rank. The logic follows with Nayuta.

The demon of war doesn't accept death, it accepts to spread it through conflicts and weapons of mass murder, but a general doesn't accept that death can touch him too. To spread death represents victory, to be touched by it a defeat that demands vengeance.

Famine works hand in hand with death, and is feared because suffering and death are the end result of not being able to eat. She's the one with the clearest goal at the moment: to save humanity. She doesn't hesitate to recruit her fellow Apocalypse members, whether it's proposing it to Nayuta, trying to recruit Asa and Yoru, or splitting Chainsaw Man in two to work with the pure state of the death demon.

The public hunters' aim is also to protect mankind from Nostradamus' prophecy, but by paralyzing death's actions as much as possible. They exploit Denji's flaws and desire to be normal to the full, threatening those around him. While the church, represented by Fami, titillates Denji's heroic side, his abnormalities, they want death to act.

It would also explain why everyone close to Denji is disappearing.

All the signs are pointing to Asa's imminent atrocity.

Wouldn't it be incredible to think that it's because death is in Denji's belly ?

Everything would then make sense: it's normal for Denji's development to stagnate, and for him to go through so many existential crises.

He doesn't know his own identity

What's more, it doesn't contradict my most meta theories: Fujimoto places himself in the work through Denji (cf. chapter 133), just as he responds directly to his fans (chapters 136 and 137).

We're all hating him, seeing all our favorite characters meet unfortunate deaths

It would all make sense if the manga we were holding in our hands, "Chainsaw Man", actually referred directly to death right from the start.

It would all make sense if we saw Part 1 as Denji's introduction to the ranks of hunters governed by an early death.

It would make sense for Aki's love for him to be a metaphor for accepting death, in the continuity of mourning.

It would make sense for Power to be reassured by Death when traumatized by the demon of darkness: she died twice for love, and the total disappearance of body and spirit allows us to escape the darkness.

I don't know if this theory holds, but let's agree...

It's poetic

[666writingcafe]

Gluttony

I should have known this was going to happen sooner rather than later.

Over the last few weeks, I've gradually grown less and less hungry. At first, I chalked it up to stress from these mock classes at RAD that me and my brothers have had to take, but anything I've done to relieve said stress only seems to exacerbate it.

And then one day I overheard Barbatos tell Diavolo that according to Solomon, Zephyr's been experiencing the munchies more frequently, and the pieces fell into place in my head.

Well, all but one: why is this experience different for me? If Zephyr's getting more gluttonous, shouldn't I be, too? Why have I not been consumed by my sin the way the others have?

"You're not good enough."

Its voice calls out to me from within the void I suddenly find myself in. I don't remember nodding off, but maybe I was forced to. Like the others have.

"What?" I ask. A little red demon steps out of the shadows. This must be my spiritual counterpart: No. 6.

"Ever since the day I was born, I've been watching you," it states calmly. "And you, Beelzebub, are truly pathetic."

"Excuse me?!" No. 6 merely laughs.

"I'm the hunger that used to burn inside you. But you've proven yourself unworthy of my services, and so I've found another host." I feel my eyes widening.

"You mean you did this intentionally?" Another laugh, much more raucous than the last.

"Of course! Gods, you're slow!" No. 6 takes a moment to compose itself. "It's not just about food, you know. You have to desire more. My counterpart should want to swallow the world whole with no hesitation, but you're too sentimental and weak." This is beginning to piss me off.

"I won't hurt my brothers."

"And there lies the problem. You put their needs above yours. Avatars aren't supposed to care about others." A brief pause. "Then again, you've always been the most angelic out of everyone, haven't you?"

Instantly, the void transforms into the Celestial Realm. A rather familiar part of it.

"If you hadn't spent so much time debating whose death would affect your so-called brothers the most, you could have saved them both."

"They were too far apart!" The scene quickly materializes around me: angels on opposite ends taking aim at an already-wounded Belphie and Lilith. "I only had time to save one!"

"You can control the wind, can't you? You could have easily used it to bring them closer to you or push the angels away from them." No. 6's grin grows larger, showing off its wicked sharp fangs. "Of course, I would have focused on saving myself. The two of them were dead weight, anyway."

"They were my family!"

"They were poor excuses for angels! I mean, developing such fascination for humans that you end up falling in love with one? They are inferior in every way!"

"Stop it!"

"Not until you accept the truth, Beelzebub! What good has your dear twin been since your arrival here? He's still obsessed over those stupid humans!"

"They're not stupid!"

"Sure they are. The only thing humans are good for is being a vessel for us to control. Free will is an experiment that failed a long time ago. They're little more than sheep, and some of them don't even taste all that great."

"And some of us have horns." Lilith stands up, except she's quickly transforming into something else.

Or rather, someone else.

"You are a conniving son of a bitch, aren't you?" Zephyr continues, fully in their demon form. "You thought you could use me to hurt Beel and get away with it?!" For the first time in this entire encounter, No. 6's demeanor changes. He's no longer confident; he's actually starting to shake as he stammers incoherently.

"I don't want to hear your excuses. You did what you did, and now you must pay the price." Zephyr crouches down, staring intently at No. 6. "I have had all kinds of things in order to satiate this hunger, but none of them have hit the spot. But I think I've just found the perfect meal." Zephyr licks their lips, causing No. 6 to squeak. Turning around, it begins running away, but Zephyr's much faster.

I don't get to see the carnage that they cause, for soon I'm sitting upright, covered in sweat.

"Good. You're awake." A bowl of soup is soon thrust in front of me. "Drink. It'll last you a couple hours."

"Where am I?"

"The castle." Of course. I recognize the servant's uniform now. "I've been assigned to tend to you until you're back to normal." I bring the bowl to my mouth and gently tip it upwards. It's warm, but not hatefully so.

"What about Zephyr?" The servant grimaces slightly.

"They'll be okay. They just have to..." He swallows. "...adjust back to their stomach."

"What do you...oh." The servant softly smiles.

"From what I've heard, it's not pretty. Only those with a strong disposition can be around them right now, and I'm--"

"--not one of those people. Got it." I quickly finish the soup and set the bowl off to the side. "So, how exactly are you supposed to 'tend to me'?"

"Basically, I'm your personal food delivery service. Whatever you're hungry for, I'll get it straight to you."

"And this applies to anything?" The servant nods his head.

"Direct order from the prince himself. All restaurants are on standby. Just one phone call, and they'll prepare whatever your heart desires."

"And they're okay with this?" He shrugs.

"It's all going on the prince's tab. Plus, I've heard he's promised all of them lucrative tips for their efforts."

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch, @budbuddnbuddy

[michanvalentine]

Things about Vincent Valentine that I read around and piss me off. Vol.2

"Vincent was too shy and passive. He is an idiot."

Usually in reference to his attitude towards Lucrecia after the breakup. As if he could somehow save his relationship with her (and thus prevent everything else). I say yes, perhaps he could have sought further clarification, but for me the situation has never been so simple and linear.

Ok, let's start from the beginning. First of all, Vincent is a sensitive and intelligent person, with an above-average education. A person who thinks a lot, even too much. So calling him an idiot, especially in such a context, is really having a superficial reading of the character. Honestly, this statement bothers me a lot even when it is extended to the other part: Lucrecia. But that's another story... Secondly, let's remember that the two had a real relationship. In DoC Vincent was never a sort of stalker fixated on Lucrecia despite the unrequited love, as he might have appeared in the OG (unless the remake wants to tell yet another story.) Even Hojo was aware of their love story, in fact when Lucrecia pronounces the fateful "Yes, doctor" he says: "So you've come to your senses and chosen me." And I don't think Hojo was exactly the type to care about gossip.

That said, I would add my interpretation on Vincent's "passivity". A while ago I read a comment, something like: Lucrecia went with Hojo to gauge how much Vincent cared about her, since she thought he hated her due to the Grimoire's death. So she was waiting for Vincent to react and take her away from Hojo, but Vincent was just too shy and passive to do something so outrageous. I couldn't help but respond to this comment like this: This would be a really sick way of demanding attention. In this case Lucrecia would be truly mentally ill and Vincent would simply be a sane person who behaves properly. I believe there are several biases in this regard. First and foremost, the old-fashioned concept of Prince Charming rescuing the damsel in distress. Which I hate. Secondly I don't think Lucrecia left Vincent because she thought he despised her for the Grimoire incident. Otherwise she wouldn't have needed to push him away, because in that case Vincent himself would have been the one to leave her. No, the reasons are different:

Feelings of guilt led her to think she couldn't be by his side. As if Vincent didn't deserve someone as bad as her in his life.

Every time she looked at Vincent, given the extreme similarity, she saw Grimoire again and remembered the event that had traumatized her.

Obviously Lucrecia didn't put Vincent to the test, she was determined to put as much distance as possible between her and Vincent because she felt it was right for him and too painful for her to continue. Stop. The relationship with Hojo is an addition, but also desired for other reasons. She neither expected nor wanted to be saved. Not to mention that Vincent is not Lucrecia's father and had neither the responsibility nor the duty to do so. She is an adult. Certainly, by breaking off their relationship, Lucrecia has also made a decision for Vincent. He didn't object, he passively accepted and stepped aside. But are we sure he could have done otherwise? Are we sure he could change Lucrecia's mind? How exactly? Young Vincent was naive and introverted, but Vincent's passivity in this case was also determined by other factors. Maybe he could have made his feelings about Grimoire's death and about Lucrecia more clear. But at the same time I think it wasn't necessary, because they were obvious. It's Lucrecia who no longer knows what her true feelings are. And she will only be able to clarify them for herself later, in fact at the end of DoC she will confess to Vincent: "I finally realized my true feelings. Even if you may never understand them".

But let's analyze the facts and see how they unfolded. Given the above, at first Lucrecia was so focused on herself due to guilt that she was numb to everything else. Even to Vincent. In DoC, when Vincent discovers the file on Grimoire, Lucrecia yells at him to "stop it". She doesn't want to listen and at the same time she doesn't give him a chance to express himself. Likewise, after apologizing to him, she ran away without giving him a chance to reply. And let's remember that out of the blue he was left by the love of his life for no valid reason, at least from his point of view. Not to mention that Grimoire's death must have been painful for him too. Reacting is not easy when you are confused, grieving and heartbroken. From that moment on, Vincent Valentine was completely cut out of Lucrecia's life. Lucrecia keeps him at a distance, due to points 1 and 2 above, and as a final barrier she puts Hojo in the middle (of course, the scientist is there too for other reasons). In the scene around the table, when Vincent asks her "if she's sure", Hojo really seems like a wall between the two that still prevents direct confrontation. And Lucrecia appears clearly angry that he has come forward with objections. At the Shinra Mansion Vincent Valentine seems to have no say in anything. Lucrecia doesn't give him the chance to argue, Hojo first rudely silences him because he's just a Turk and then definitively closes his mouth with a bullet. But even if silenced, Vincent's feelings and intentions remain evident. Even Hojo knew them, in fact when he discovers that Lucrecia is experimenting on Vincent's body he says: "How happy this fellow must be. Helping his beloved even after he's begun rotting away." Lucrecia herself, through her data, at a certain point in DoC will say: "I pushed you away, but… now I realize, I never wanted to lose you." And again later: "I made so many mistakes. And I hurt you so, so much. Why did I do what I did?" Deep down Lucrecia knew she had pushed him away for her own personal reasons, and not because he despised her or anything. She knew she had made a mistake, of having been blinded by fear and guilt, that she had mortified his feelings and that she had made him suffer for it, especially because the breakup had been practically forced on him. So I repeat: should he continue to chase Lucrecia, proclaiming his love like a crazy in the hope of changing her mind? Let's pretend he had the opportunity (always excluding kidnappings or ambushes). He could have to, yes, but in addition to reiterating the obvious and saying things already known even to the person concerned (after all, if there is something imperishable, capable of overcoming pain, time and even death, it is the love that Vincent Valentine feels for Lucrecia), she probably wouldn't have listened to him anyway. Because, as Vincent would say, "she was always like that, only believing what she wanted to."

[luthien-under-bough]

my meandering thoughts after ep7:

i think a lot of people are overlooking the importance of daemon's scenes in episode 7 in focusing so much on oscar tully. like ok sure it is objectively funny to see daemon be read for filth by a teenager, but this is not some meta punishment doled out by the writers because they hate his character - or even oscar "gagging" daemon. this is daemon directly responding to rhaenyra's accusation during their ep2 argument: "I think you used my words as an excuse to take your own revenge… to indulge the darkness you keep sheathed within you like a blade." Oscar's own words to willem blackwood call back to this: "it is true that he made clear his base desires, but you did not have to pursue such savagery. You did it… because you wanted to."

like yes, daemon is being humbled, but he is also specifically acting contrary to his own desires, and choosing to do what is necessary in service to rhaenyra's claim. it's obvious in the look he shares with ser simon, and in his shifting expression from anger to acceptance as he realizes he must do this to earn the crucial support of the riverlords. i do not think the daemon of episode 2/3 would have responded this way. he would have given into that impulse that's telling him to smack oscar around and burn the lot of them. he is putting aside what he would do, in favor of what rhaenyra needs him to do.

And the look on his face afterwards is full of horror - for the first time we really see him haunted by his own act of violence, when we've typically seem him remorseless or flippant (rhea royce, vaemond velaryon, the unnamed body they used for laenor's "death") if it advances his aims. this contrasts with rhaenyra in this same episode, where we see her really indulging in violence for the first time - she sacrifices the dragonseeds in pursuit of finding new dragonriders, which is also a repudiation of her and daemon's earlier argument, where he accused her of being too weak to spill blood to achieve greatness.

(literally everything they do ties back to one another, their influence on one another, and which parts of each other and viserys they choose to internalize and express - two halves of a whole, indeed - so it baffles me that most daemyras are unsatisfied with this storyline just because they aren't physically together, but that's a story for another post)

daemon's scene in the Harrenhal godswood leads directly into the vision with viserys, where he is confronted with the question of whether or not he still wants the crown (really, if he ever actually wanted it - or was it just a symbol of his brother's love, of recognition, of the ultimate tool to achieve power and respect in this world). he's just had to make a choice and take an action that conflicts with his own worldview, of what strength and loyalty means, of the acceptability to the ends justifying the means, of the ramifications of the collateral damage that such choices have - which is all tied into the true weight of bearing the crown. is he really cut out for this? i think it's clear the answer will be 'no' - and it will reaffirm his support for rhaenyra, at the same time her own journey has brought her to a place where she has found a way to wield her power and authority in a way that can be respected (and feared) and is independent of her reliance on daemon's martial prowess and masculinity.

if there's still any doubt that daemon's visions all have purpose and are moving him forward, i really don't know what to tell you. it's frustrating to see his arc reduced to "daemon is doing nothing all season" because most of it has been internal. both daemon and rhaenyra have grown from the accusations levied at one another in their argument, and i think are positioned well for a reunion that allows them to "finish their conversation" from a place where they are both more able to function within the parameters of their strange and unique relationship as sovereign/consort, husband/wife. uncle/niece, and even brother/sister (as their relationship to viserys is very much reminiscent of siblings competing for their father's love and attention). it's a very clear arc to me, and i am very excited to see how it all comes together in the finale (as well as how this sets the stage for future conflict between them).

(the " but in the book…" arguments about daemon at this point are also weak IMO, because daemon basically does nothing during this section in the book. and because the show has added different dimensions to his character that simply do not exist in the source material. his time in harrenhal is summed up in a couple of paragraphs. the riverlords all honor their oaths without conflict - and he fights in the battle of Stone Hedge, which you can mourn as an adaptational choice you do not agree with, but personally i think it's far less interesting than what we were given in the show.)

this is where i wish the fandom at large would give the writers a little more credit, and extend your faith a little further. sure there are some odd choices throughout, and yes they have taken adaptational liberties you may not agree with - but as we near the end of the season, the overall vision for daemon (and rhaenyra) is clearer, and i think it will be even more rewarding looking back on the season as a whole.

[bengiyo]

Unknown Ep 12 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Wei Qian and Xiao Yuan consummated the physical desire in their relationship, before Wei Qian ended up trying to deal with his head injury on his own again. Yuan broke through that and the two went home together, where Li Li was being supported by San Pang. I'm still feeling some consternation about the way they framed that sex scene and how they handled the emotional aftermath.

Li Li is reminding me of my own sister handling my coming out somewhat poorly because she was mad that she wasn't informed sooner.

I like her moving around the table to talk more intimately with Yuan after getting the big answers she needed.

Episode 12: Us

I like everyone trying to navigate this dynamic between Wei Qian and Yuan carefully. I'm a big fan of Xiong wanting to make sure he knows he's on their side.

Wei Qian looks so much better when it doesn't look like he's being crushed by the weight of the world.

Men should grab each other by their ties and kiss each other more often.

Yuan is a menace! He was not going to keep this on the DL at all.

Oh no...top-bottom discourse. Thank you for shutting it down, Wei Qian.

Li Li is pregante!!

This hallway scene is phenomenal. Wei Qian really is such a good brother, and I really love the way this scene reminds us of that. This thing with Yuan was super confusing, but he kept his cool so quickly with Li Li and focused on the important things. Yuan coming out of her room to intercept Qian. Li Li coming out of Yuan's room to talk. San Pang entering from Qian's room, and then the ensuing fight across all three rooms.

See all of Qian's reactions here are well-grounded in what we know of his relationship with Li Li and how hard things were with their mother.

Not me crying because of this group handhold.

I'm not sure it was clear earlier that their mom chose to die. This adds another harsh layer to Wei Qian's worries for Li Li.

They're doing that thing where they focus on Yuan maybe a little too much.

I'm relieved to know that Li Li had her baby without many lingering worries.

Final Verdict: 8.5, Recommended. I think the early parts of his series were incredibly strong, but I think there were some problems after they sent Yuan away to NYC. I feel like they didn't properly capture the turn for Wei Qian where things go from fraternal to romantic, and especially sexual. They introduced terrible sexual trauma to his story in a way that went unresolved, so it hurt the big moment where he decided to accept things with Yuan. I'm also high-key mad about this head injury plotline because they ended this show without telling us about the surgery, too. It didn't fully-connect with the family angst they were going for and left me a bit unsatisfied with it as a running plot in the background. That said, I think this show took the found family and relationship change conceits seriously and I respect that.

[90sbee]

You are my canvas, I am your doll

Leon S. Kennedy x Fem!Reader

1k words. Also on ao3.

And when you two pull apart, he looks even more desirable. Full of need, of love, pupils dilated and lips parted. You caress his eyebrow gently, eyes focused on the way his eyelashes —coated with your mascara and the smudged eyeliner— look on him.

Leon and you attend a party. You just had to do his make-up first.

You know, this is not funny. You let @navstuffs read this one earlier cos you want to spoil her and she ends up giving you more ideas. Not fair. So yeah I guess I’m writing a second part actually.

Content: Mostly reader’s pov. No use of y/n. OOC Leon because he is actually living his best life here and not depressed as shit. Reader is shorter than Leon. Leon is slightly dom but he also calls himself ‘good boy’ and ‘pretty boy’. Pet names, established relationship, Leon confused about make-up items. Did I mention doing his make-up sitting on his lap because yes.

Warnings: +18 cos brief smut (Leon just loves eating pussy, actually). Minors and ageless blogs dni. Alcohol consumption but no one is drunk. Grinding aka slutty dance moves. Leon is insecure about his looks for like. 2 lines.

He is a gorgeous sight, blond strands crowning his face, the way his smirk seems to follow you as you two dance closely, bodies almost locked together. There are others around you, but Leon makes it clear that his gaze is only fixed on you, glittering blue eyes enjoying your figure.

You turn around, stop the lustful grinding against him, and cup his cheek, forcing his strong body to accommodate to your lower height. The alcohol is already making you bubbly, but he does not mind.

“Pretty. Pretty boy,” you breathe out, grazing his lips with delicacy.

“Yeah? Your pretty boy,” he repeats.

You smile.

He is a gorgeous sight indeed. Dark t-shirt doing nothing to hide his pecs, biceps stretching the thin clothing, as if teasing you —you know he is. You press a quick kiss into his lips and for a moment he frowns, surprised. He hadn’t expected it. He mouths something, but the music is too loud to decipher anything.

“What did you say?���

“I asked why just one… Do it again,” he answers, already attacking your neck with gentle bites, eager to mark his precious angel. You huff, and scratch his head, your hips moving once more to the rhythm of the songs.

“I love you.”

“Love you too,” Leon immediately replies, stealing a kiss from you.

And when you two pull apart, he looks even more desirable. Full of need, of love, pupils dilated and lips parted. You caress his eyebrow gently, eyes focused on the way his eyelashes —coated with your mascara and the smudged eyeliner— look on him.

You’re vaguely aware that your lipstick is probably messed up now, but he does not seem to care. Probably finds you the prettiest woman in the world, no matter what.

“See? Told you you’d look so hot with some make-up on.”

He chuckles, standing to his true height, and pulling you into his chest: gentle laugh emanating from his throat as he kisses your temple.

“As long as we don’t do this too often…” Leon warns you, though he is secretly amused by it. He’d do anything for you anyway. Anything to make you happy, to see that toothy smile etched on your face his whole life.

You two dance slowly then, out of beat. The world you share being the only song to follow. You close your eyes, hugging his body, face pressed tightly against him.

You love him so much. You’re so thankful that he accepted to spoil you with your little date suggestion; that after all the pain he has told you about, he is still willing to try to entertain you, even when it comes to such mundane things.

“Mine,” you mewl, gripping his body harder, suddenly feeling way too fortunate for the man that you get to call boyfriend.

Leon smiles, enjoying the touch, snorting as he shakes his head.

“Someone clingy tonight?”

“You know, you’re just looking too fine. Someone may steal you, actually”

“Doubt anyone could just steal me, I’m quite heavy,” he jokes, sliding his hands up and down your back, his fingers grazing your skin.

“I’ll put you in my pocket, young man.”

“I’d like to see you try that, young lady.”

Laughing against his chest, you look up at him, chin pressed against his pecs, the beating heart in his chest as the most joyful song you’ve heard your whole life.

“There’s my sunshine,” he says, voice raspy, caressing your cheek.

You remember then how he let you work on him, sitting on his lap.

“Pretty please?” you beg once more. Leon licks his lips, feigning annoyance though he already knows he will succumb to your demands.

“Remind me again what I’m getting out of this,” he crosses his arms, figure towering over you, a mocking expression on his face.

“You’ll be all gorgeous. Well, even more gorgeous than you already are,” you try to unsheathe your reasonings to him once more, hoping that he will finally accept them this time. And, it must be your lucky day, since Leon just smirks, nodding.

“You owe me a nice meal,” he states, before you take his hand, excitedly guiding him to take a seat on the couch, next to where all your make-up is already awaiting for him.

Truth be told, Leon is more than pretty. Handsome, strong, features of exquisite delicacy. There was nothing you’d change about him, completely enamoured as you are of him. But deep inside, burned your curiosity, how he’d look like with make-up on, lips glossy, or even an elegant smokey eye decorating his eyelids.

As you start grabbing your make-up items, taking a seat on his lap, Leon gulps. He has to admit it, the existence of that little speck of insecurity boiling in his stomach. As you examine a small black stick whose function he ignores, he frowns slightly.

“What exactly are we doing today?” he asks.

“Not sure yet. Probably just something that accentuates your eyes,” you reply, the little tub and stick nearly on his face now. “Your eyelashes are to die for.”

“Is that a good thing?” he inquires, still confused.

“Definitely,” you look at him, concentrated, and he sighs, but nods, consciously choosing to let you work on him in silence.

“I’ll let the pretty artist do her thing,” he whispers, as you start drawing a thin line next to his waterline. Your movements are slow, tongue sticking out as you make sure to nail the eyeliner trace, curling eyelashes with the most utter tenderness and then applying the mascara with very light strokes, warning him not to blink.

“What if I do?” he asks, serious.

“You’re not getting kisses.”

“Sounds like I’ll better be a good boy then,” he adds, pulling your hips closer to his, voice needy.

Leon notices your mind seems to have wandered off. He caresses your cheek with his thumb, his gaze concerned.

“Everything okay?”

You nod slowly, flustered.

“I’m just thinking…”

You just look up at him once more, and Leon swears he could die. Prettiest little thing, so small and precious in his grip, eyes hungry. And he understands. He nods, quickly, before taking your hand, head already anticipating what may fill up the rest of the night.

“Let’s go home, love.”

And when you two end up in bed that night, lipstick on each other’s faces and mascara clumps on your cheeks, framing wet kisses and hard thrusting, you find he has never looked hotter than now. With your make-up all over his face as he, gallant as usual, licks your juices off his lips.

“One more?” He says, though he doesn’t really expects an answer, as he dives his mouth once again between your thighs.

I have to stop thinking of slutty Leon with make-up or I'll go stupid. Dividers by @/cafekitsune and @/vase-of-lilies

[nekohime19]

Mini Mac #16 : Lil guy longing

Macaque is worried about Wukong not returning, but he has the monkeys to cheer him up!

Macaque was sitting outside of the water-curtain cave, looking at the sky, trying to pierce the azure with his eyes. His tail was wrapped on his waist in a pitiful attempt at comfort as he stood still, looking upward with hope. It's been 10 years since Wukong left for Heaven. Macaque knew that time upward wasn't the same, years for him were nothing but merely days for the sage, still he couldn't help but be worried. The wind brought him distorted echoes of what was happening. It was messy and twisted, the words carried for too long to be clear, still Macaque could hear sounds of flames and cries. It worried him greatly. He spent hours each day sitting outside and looking at the sky, returning at night in the mansion with lowered shoulders.

Macaque had never bonded with someone before. He had never trusted someone like this, nor even liked someone as much as he liked Wukong. The sage had wormed his way in his heart, he was his first friend, the first person he felt comfortable with, Macaque couldn't help but be longing for him.

The wind ruffled Macaque's hair and tried to push him but the lil guy pushed it away and stayed sitting, eyes on the sky. He was so focused he didn't even notice when one monkey approached him. Macaque startled when he heard one chirp at his side, he turned and crossed eyes with a clear-furred slender monkey. One of Wukong stalwarts generals, Ma, if he recalled correctly. She was looking at him with softened eyes, sitting in silence beside him. Macaque stepped back a little to widen the distance between them and Ma seemed to respect that, she stayed silent, watching the sky with him.

When night fell she chirped at him, something soft, probably made to not startle him, “wanna join?” He looked at her awkwardly, he knew what she was referring to. Since the sage's departure, all monkeys frequently made nests in the mansion and slept together, all tangled with each other. A way to comfort each other in the absence of their King. And while it was tempting, Macaque wasn't one for that much intimacy, he wasn't part of this troop, after all.

“No… It's okay.” Muttered Macaque as he returned to the mansion, sleeping alone in his sheet.

Ma joined him often after this, sometimes she came with cubs. Lil Yong and lil Yue in particular liked to spend time with him. Macaque felt a bit better, he resumed his shadow plays, and stayed a little less still. Yet he couldn't shake off his worry, looking upward every now and then with the mad hope to see Wukong descend. One night, after spending some time looking at the sky, he accepted Ma’s offer and slept at the edge of the nest. He didn't dare enter but he curled on the border, feeling appeased by the echoing snoring.

He blinked his eyes open at one point and noticed two pairs of eyes looking at him from the nest. He recognized those eyes as lil Yue's and lil Yong's. They approached the edge of the nest slowly and curled just beside him. Not quite touching him but close enough to share their warmth. Macaque felt a bit weird, he wasn't used to so much proximity, but it wasn't bad. It felt good, in a very odd way.

Since then, he took the habit to sleep at the edges of the nests, he was still cautious but he also felt comforted. For once he decided to stop worrying about being part of the troop or not and only let himself be.

***

Sometimes, Macaque climbed the tallest tree beside the water-curtain cave and looked at the horizon. He had never liked the outside world. He had been harassed by a lot of people out there and had never truly found his place. The water-curtain cave was his sanctuary, his place of respite, he didn’t want to leave it. Yet he also felt the desire to take to the sea and search for information on Wukong. He heard echoes of the brotherhood sometimes but they never clearly stated what happened upward, nor where Wukong was. He wanted to find them. To know what happened. To find out where his friend was. But he was scared of the lands beyond the sea, and each time he thought of this he cowered and felt guilty about it.

This time, as he perched in the highest branch and looked at the horizon in guilt, he heard someone perch beside him. He looked to the side and found a gray-furred monkey with a fox snout. It was Beng, another one of Wukong's stalwart generals. If Ma tended to be silent and respectful of his boundaries, Beng was one cheeky little bastard. He always purposefully startled him when Macaque curled at the edges of the nest, perhaps liking to scare him. The lil guy glared at the gray-furred monkey, trying to convey his dislike of him, but said monkey snorted in amusement. Beng stayed with him a little, fiddling with the tree leaves in boredom, before throwing a plum at him and climbing down the tree. Macaque chirped in surprise but he caught the plum. He reluctantly cut pieces out of it and ate it, the taste of his favorite food cheered him a little.

As he chewed on the plum, looking at the horizon, Macaque heard chirps below him. He looked down and found lil Yue and lil Yong looking up at him, sitting at the foot of the tree. Lil Yong, always the bravest, tried to climb but he stumbled and fell on his butt. He pouted as lil Yue cackled at his misery.

“This tree is too steep for you, lil one.” Called Macaque with a fond huff. Yet lil Yong did not give up, he even roped lil Yue in his shenanigans. After trials and errors, they managed to reach the first branch. Macaque was quite impressed, this wasn't an easy tree to climb. He climbed down to reach them and decided to indulge them a bit, letting them pet him.

If cubs were brave enough to climb a tree too steep, maybe he could be brave enough to take the sea in search of his friend.

+ cut scenes

Stalwarts generals inner thoughts :

Ma : Our king lil shadow is feeling bad recently 😔

Beng : He's tiny, that's funny! 😀

Ch1 / Previous / Next

[beware-of-you-98]

bestie quick jemily prompt for you:

A: do I look like I know what I’m doing?

B: [starts to reply]

A: [holds up hand] actually, don’t answer that.

B: [shrugs and walks away]

[explosion]

A: that wasn’t me.

make it fluff, make it angst.. just no smut challenge tee hee have fun if you answer the call

challenge accepted??

Breakfast was something Emily Prentiss is good at, especially when she’s making the breakfast for her family. She has it down to a science: getting the pot of coffee ready for her fiancé, while JJ gets the twins bottle fed and laid in their bassinets, Henry settled at the table while she works over the stove.

(Or helping her out if he so desires. Emily’s not one to say “no” to the 8 year old too often.)

It’s something she’s done for years at this point, and something she refuses to accept JJ’s help with.

(It’s a small, daily act of service she does to show the blonde just how much she appreciates her, and while it’s far from the only act Emily does, there’s a part of her that still gets butterflies as she watches JJ watching her and their children interact before their day begins.)

It’s a bit more challenging, though, when both Matthew and Maggie grow into rambunctious toddlers.

Matthew’s her little shadow, and often refuses to peel himself from her side right after he wakes up in the morning.

Maggie often follows what her slightly younger brother does, craving her maman’s attention as she babbles enthusiastically about the dreams she’s had, or what her stuffed animals are up to.

It’s more difficult, sure, but Emily manages.

She has Matthew and Maggie sit down on chairs she’s pulled from the island, close enough so she can focus her attention on both children while simultaneously focusing on the stovetop.

Henry, with his long hair tied up in a messy bun not too dissimilar from Emily’s, stands beside the older woman as he makes the eggs.

He’s definitely more put together than Emily is at this current moment.

Matthew is a bit more clingy than normal, whimpering for her and not satisfied until he’s up in his maman’s arms, clinging to her tightly and refusing to let go.

Maggie, on the other hand, is very enthusiastic and talkative demanding Emily’s attention pointedly whenever she tries to focus her attention elsewhere for even a split second.

“Maman,” she demands impatiently, tiny hand on her hip. She sits up on the tall chair on her knees, making Emily’s anxiety peak.

“Whoa, bug!” she says cautiously, maneuvering Maggie’s chair close to the countertop to the toddler doesn’t go tumbling to the floor. It’s difficult with Matthew balanced on her hip, but she manages. Maggie’s giggle is shrill as the chair she’s on slides slowly towards the countertop, her hands planting on the granite excitedly. She bends down and plants a kiss on top of the girl’s long black locks.

Matthew whines, pressing himself further into Emily’s grasp. She gently bounces him on her hip, shushing him gently before planting a kiss to his temple. “Oh, buddy, it’s okay,” she coos to him assuredly.

She glances around Matthew’s head towards the empty bowl on the counter, puffing out a breath. She’s not entirely sure if she can mix the pancake ingredients with one hand, and she’s honestly not too sure what Matthew’s reaction will be once she has to set him down to cook on the stove.

From across the room at the table, JJ smiles tenderly at the scene. “Need a hand?” she offers, chin in her hand, elbow propped on the table. “Want me to take Mattie?”

Emily gently blows Matthew’s hair from her lips, tucking the toddler’s head under her chin to look over at her fiancé. Her eyes soften, smile spreading automatically on her face at the adoring look on the blonde’s face. “No way,” she insists gently. “We got this.” She grins, raising a brow. “Why? Does it look like i know what I’m doing?”

JJ raises a brow, lips curled into a smirk.

Emily’s eyes narrow, pointing a finger over at the blonde. “Oh, don’t you answer that.”

“Maman!” Maggie demands.

Emily peers down at their daughter, tenderly stroking her cheek with her index finger.

Maggie, satisfied with the gesture, goes on about her dream.

With one hand wrapped securely around Matthew, Emily cracks an egg into the bowl, pours in a touch of vanilla extract and caps it just as steadily.

From beside her, Henry slowly stirs the eggs in the pan.

Emily grins smugly across at JJ. “See? We got this,” she repeats boldly. “You just sit there and look pretty.”

JJ snorts, rolling her eyes fondly.

Emily grins adoringly over at her, before her attention is dragged back to Maggie. She murmurs in earnest at the toddler’s thoughts, looking around the countertop.

Maggie grabs her sippy cup full of orange juice, drinking from it deeply.

Emily sighs softly when the realization hits her: she forgot to grab the flour.

“We’re gonna go up,” she murmurs to Matthew, peering up at the cupboard above her head just to the right of the stove. “Careful, bug,” she adds, gently touching Maggie’s shoulder as she reaches up to open the small door.

Fear grips her chest as the brown paper bag tilts out, falling out towards the countertop.

With speed she only figured out she possessed after becoming a mother, she grips Maggie back beside her with the same arm she’s using for Matthew, her other arm shooting out to push Henry away from the stove.

She hears JJ move just as quickly, the chair she had been sitting it clacking to the floor.

The bag of flour lands on the counter with a solid thud, tearing open and spraying the four in a cloud of white.

She closes her eyes, shielding all three children’s eyes either with her arm [Henry] or tucking their faces into her neck and shirt [Matthew and Maggie].

She puffs out a breath, knowing a cloud of flour expels from her lips. “That… wasn’t me.”

She opens her eyes to the sound of the stove shutting off.

JJ is standing in front of them all, her hand over her mouth and eyes shining in amusement.

Emily grins at her sheepishly before she peers down at the kids, shoulders slumped in relief.

She’s covered head to toe in flour, her black shirt looking as if it’s been dipped in white paint.

The twins’ entire sides and hair dusted in the substance as well, Henry appearing to have avoided the flour the most. (Though, his shirt has a dusting of flour coating the front, and there’s a delicate pile in his hair).

Maggie lets out a shrill laugh, her hand coming up to cover her toothy grin. A cloud of flour falls from her tiny frame as she giggles. She looks up at JJ, beaming. “Hi, mommy!”

“Hello, little snowflake,” JJ beams, her thumb curling along the girl’s cheek before hoisting her up. Flour smears messily along her red t-shirt, but the blonde doesn’t mind.

Matthew blinks owlishly, pouting at the flour covering his body. “Mommy,” he murmurs, sighing as he tucks further into Emily.

JJ presses a kiss to the back of his head, her fingertips dancing along his back. She peers across towards Henry, eyes shining. “Baby, you okay?”

Henry shakes the flour from his hair like a dog drying off, spraying both his moms in the substance. “I’m good!” he chirps.

Maggie screams with another giggle, holding her hands out to avoid the slow onslaught.

Henry goes to poke the flour soaked eggs with the spatula he was using to stir them with. His lips press together to stop himself from laughing. “Eggs aren’t, though,” he adds.

Emily grins sheepishly, hiding her expression behind Matthew’s hair as she looks down at JJ. “I’ll order Denny’s?”

JJ raises an eyebrow over at her.

Emily presses her lips together. “I’ll clean up this mess and you’ll order Denny’s?” she tries again.

“There you go.” JJ bumps her hip playfully against Emily’s. “Love you, you stubborn woman.”

Emily stares back at her, expression completely lovestruck. “Love you, too.”

[hrizantemy]

Since it’s most likely that we’re gonna get Elain’s book next and I don’t really talk about Elain a lot on this account I would just give my opinion on her and how I view her personally and what she means to me.

Elain reminds me of myself, especially in the way she doesn’t evoke strong personal opinions from me. This indifference isn’t due to her character being unremarkable, but rather because she mirrors aspects of my own past. As a child, my trauma response was to become the quintessential “good child.” I learned to suppress my emotions and opinions, striving to never say the wrong thing, never yell, get upset, or show anger. This coping mechanism was my way of navigating a turbulent environment, aiming to avoid conflict and earn approval.

Elain’s character embodies this same quiet resilience and conflict-avoidance. Her tendency to stay out of confrontations and maintain a serene exterior resonates deeply with my own childhood behavior. It’s this reflection of my younger self that makes it difficult for me to form distinct opinions about her—it’s like looking into a mirror and seeing a part of me that I understand all too well, but also prefer to keep at a distance. Through Elain, I see the echoes of my own experiences and the complexities of being the “good child,” always striving for peace at the cost of my own voice and emotions.

My sister reminds me of Nesta, which is why I love her so deeply. Despite being younger than me, she was always the opposite of the "good child" I tried so hard to be. While I focused on being quiet and compliant, she embraced her anger. Her refusal to suppress her emotions set her apart and, in many ways, protected both of us.

Nesta's fierce independence and willingness to confront difficult truths resonate with my sister's personality. My sister's anger was never just about being rebellious; it was a way of asserting herself and fighting against the constraints that I often silently accepted. Her courage to express her feelings, no matter how intense, made her someone I admire deeply.

Loving my sister for these traits is easy because, through her, I see a strength I often wished I had. Her ability to stand up for herself and others, even when it meant facing disapproval, created a balance in our relationship. She was the voice when I was silent, the storm when I was calm. My deep love for her stems from this dynamic; her unapologetic anger and passion were a counterbalance to my own subdued nature. Through her, I learned that it's okay to feel and express every emotion, even the difficult ones.

Growing up, I was forced into a parental role by my mother who was abusice, a responsibility that weighed heavily on me from a young age. Elain’s character resonates deeply with the trauma I experienced and witnessed, particularly through Nesta’s tumultuous relationship with their mother and grandmother. Nesta’s struggles with their expectations and the harsh treatment they endured parallel my own challenges. Both Elain and Nesta embody different responses to trauma—Elain retreats into gentleness and seeks peace, while Nesta confronts her pain with defiance and anger.

I don’t always agree with some of the things Elain does, similarly, there are aspects of Nesta’s choices that I struggle to reconcile with. With Elain, her tendency to prioritize peace and harmony can sometimes lead to decisions or actions that I question. There are moments where I wish she would assert herself more or take a stand against injustices. However, I understand that her desire to avoid conflict stems from a place of wanting stability and protection for herself and her loved ones. Her choices reflect her own coping mechanisms and the traumas she carries, much like my own experiences of trying to maintain calm in turbulent times.

On the other hand, Nesta’s defiance and sometimes abrasive behavior can be difficult to support. Her actions, driven by her own pain and anger, often clash with societal expectations or even with the people closest to her. Yet, I empathize deeply with her struggle to reclaim her autonomy and voice after enduring profound trauma. Her journey towards self-discovery and healing, though tumultuous, speaks to the resilience and strength within her.

In both Elain and Nesta, I see reflections of me and my sister a complexity—flawed, yet profoundly real. They embody different responses to adversity, and my understanding of them is shaped by my own experiences of navigating difficult circumstances. While I may not agree with every choice they make, I empathize with the reasons behind their actions and respect their individual paths towards healing and self-acceptance.

[idledreams4]

Wincesties

PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one here who has watched The Postcard Killings and thought about Sam and Dean

Like if their life had gone a little differently

That could be them.

Traveling across the country, not to hunt monsters, but people. Telling the world their story through beautifully grotesque tableaus, begging for acceptance and fighting for validity.

Every lesson they were taught, they learned through violence. So that's the only way they believe they can teach others.

I know I got a little too focused on the wrong part of the movie, I'm pretty sure I was supposed to care more about Detective Kanon getting closure and justice for his daughter, but the second I heard the line "You'll find her with him" was said I knew that the killers were the siblings and that there was some crazy codependent incest going on

Dean would be Marina. She's clearly the leader, and her determination to see their work through to the end reminds me so much of him lol

Sam, of course, is an abomination would then be Simon. He's softer, seems to be less attached to Marina than she is to him, and when they read the article that gives them the recognition and validity they're after he's actually willing to just stop and run away with Marina because they got what they were after. Which, I'm (not) sorry, but that came across as so sam-coded to me. Like just wanting to put everything behind them so that they can be together in peace? Sam.

I wanted to put this in tags, but I want to squeeze in too many similarities so it's really long

#If I had a nickel for every time JDM played a father in a piece of media where a pair of siblings with insane daddy issues were raised in an abusive environment, causing them to not only become codependent to the point where you cannot separate them, but also form an incredibly deep bond that extends well past romantic or sexual desire but is expressed through those things (also violence) because those are the only things that can actually compare to the intensity and passion

#I would have two nickels #which isn't a lot but it's REALLY weird that it happened twice

[lightning-chicken]

What Lies Beneath Mountains

i wrote something for a server writing game (hi, nwod people!) and i decided to post it! this is based of off the deleted scene at the end of s13, where the munce and geckle return to the mountain.

(ao3 version here.)

It’s quiet under the mountain.

Pickaxes carve into rock, carts roll along tracks, stone is moulded and beaten into delicate swirls. The Munce and Geckle workers toil together in silence—not out of fear, like before, but out of respect and a rare kind of reverence. Any half-buried grievances have been put aside in the name of someone both sides admired.

Another someone.

One statue already inhabits the temple beneath the mountain, but that isn’t what the workers are here for. They’re focused on a new figure carved out of rock: a new hero, sent to help the people who idolised his mother.

Coincidence or fate? Maybe she has too much faith in the writers in the clouds, but she’d like to believe it’s a mix of both.

As this second statue is lifted into place—pulled by Munce and Geckle giving every ounce of energy they can, just like the heroes did for them—its features come to light. That statue is smaller than the other, and shaped into a different likeness, but the similarities are unavoidable: intricate yet durable swirls wrap around both the statues’ rocky skin, echoing each other but unique in their own ways. Gritty stone has been hewn into his features where polished stone was sculpted into hers; they’re two chunks of the same rock, shaped by different processes over the course of their lives but undeniably from the same roots.

Similar, but beautifully unique.

It’s all she ever hoped that he’d achieve: living his life on his own terms, putting his heart and soul into causes he believes in. For that, and for a thousand other reasons, she’s so, so proud of him.

Slabs of stone are pushed into place, and the second statue is secured in its place beside the first.

Tools clink together as the workers pack up their bags, filing out of the temple one by one. The completion of a monument like this should be a cause for celebration, yet the workers are hushed and the air is heavy. It’s not celebration, it’s quiet reflection and respect.

The workers have lived here long enough to know that this temple is home to more than stone monoliths.

Workers begin to make their way back up the mountain, the dull thuds of their feet receding into whispers of noise. Any lingering traces of activity are scrubbed away with the last worker’s departure, and the stone doors are gently pulled shut.

It’s quiet under the mountain.

Dark, too—the light from the workers’ torches has long since withdrawn to the upper levels of the mountain, rendering the statues near-blind in their temple.

Not for long, though.

Rock shifts and lava slips through the cracks, running in rivulets through the central carving on the floor. It streams outwards in spirals, emitting a soft golden glow that gets brighter with every new drop of lava exposed.

Heat rises and hangs in the air—not the blistering roar of fire, but the simmering heat of a hot spring. The gentle warmth of soil on a summer’s day. The unconditional pride of a parent’s love.

Molten rock entwines around the younger statue’s feet and stretches to his hands, welcoming and accepting him as part of the temple. The glow burns brightest not at his heart but at his fingers—they’re mere breaths from hers; so, so close to touching, but not quite there.

Not quite there.

They remain like that, for a while: one statue lit with all the might of the earth, and the other dull in comparison. Tarnished by time and weary from loss.

The desire to close this tiny, tiny gap shimmers deep in her stone chest, but she shoves it down and lets it simmer deeper. Closing the gap is something she used to be able to do, something she used to have the opportunity to do. Not now.

Closing the gap is something she gave up when she used her final years as a hero to fight and not rest. She doesn’t regret her time travelling or helping those who needed it—it’s the opposite, in fact. She loved that, and she can see the same desire ended up running in the family.

No, what she regrets is not being able to help those she cared about the most: she couldn’t help them when coughs rattled her frame every time she spoke; she couldn’t help them when getting out of bed took more effort than moving a mountain; and she couldn’t help them when all her strength finally left her and she died.

But she’s made piece with that. What’s done is done, and what is gone will soon bloom anew in another form.

Warmth seeps through every shard of her body as the lava pools at her feet, and—

Rough rock grazes her hand.

Just for a moment—but another moment is everything she hoped for.

Her stone shifts, head tilting left, left, left, inch by inch, until she can see him properly. His statue is back where it was originally placed; the only way she can tell it’s been moved (no, he moved by himself) is the disturbed soil and brighter glow.

That same glow sings through her skin. He isn’t the real thing and neither is she, but it’s close, and close means everything.

Lilly looks at her son and smiles.

[chuckeroo777]

Dungeon Meshi Volume 13 Part 1

Welcome back! Things are about to reach a breaking point! You know things are crazy when all six chapters of the volume have the same name.

Volume 13's cover is literally just the gang running away from a spoiler, so please accept these cute pictures of baby Marcille from the daydream hours.

A precious image.

Wishes, man. There's always a catch. Whether that be an evil genie, or a perfect unconscious wish, it never goes how you want. This one doesn't even let you say no thanks.

This is such a good fake-out. Now someone grab some zip-ties.

So, is Marcille going to struggle with impulse control for the rest of her life, or did it just eat her desire not to lead an army to the surface?

Sure you will buddy. *proceeds to, in fact, not be careful*

Oh god, if he defeats the demon, we'll be out of a job.

This is cool and all, but what happens to this avatar after the gang goes inside? Does it turn back into monsters? Does it simply vanish? It's totally gone next time we see outside.

There was probably a more literal translation for that onomatopoeia, but damn if that isn't perfect. I also like the detail that Mithrun lost his fake eye.

Happy 8/8 everyone.

Going a little out of order here, since Chapter 87 and Misc tales 13 go together. So, everything seems to indicate that the Demon and magic itself are one and the same. But where do spirits fit into all of this? Are spirits, like, sub-sentient demon bits? Are they micro-organisms that can use magic? Everything in this page sure sounds like gnomish magic to me.

Genuinely curious how the anime will handle these panels.

How? No, seriously, how did the ancients trap the demon? The demon is an entity of unlimited power. Why is it contrained to rules? We know it likes fulfilling desires, but what's stopping it from acting on its own? Why did it need to swap with Laios just to use its power for itself? It's never really explained how the demon came to be constrained. I understand the demon's current rules, but I don't know how we reached this point.

So much world-building in one panel. I don't really get how the demon managed such massive, world sweeping changes though.

The demon is exceptionally awful. It is manipulative, selfish, cruel, and it ultimately takes everything that matters away. But it didn't become that way because of its intrinsic nature. It learned to be evil by watching us.

Seriously, the exit is right there. What is keeping the demon bound to these dungeons?

Yeah, maybe should have figured that out before going right into the lion's den. (haha)

No, see, that's the beauty of Laios' plan. By focusing so hard on plan A, the lion will be completely blindsided by plan B.

I'm sure Falin would think it's cute.

She does her best not to show it... but this is a big moment for Izutsumi. No one has ever trusted her. No one has ever implicitly trusted her with something important like this. And the craziest part? She's actually going to do it. Laios is right to trust her.

One interesting takeaway from this story is the lesson that people are, by their very nature, selfish beings. Yet, we push through, and do the right thing anyway. I'm sure someone smarter than me could articulate it better. Something something, Laios' curse.

I have some thoughts on this panel. Check out my post where I go into it in detail!

I know this is a serious moment, but Laios just looks like a creepy chicken.

Laios failed the vibe check. He looked WAY too cool and professional as he chopped off the lion's head.

Laios doesn't have an evil bone in his body, yet we're getting a Laios villain arc anyway!

Oh no! What are our heroes going to do! Find out next post!

[miraclemaya]

Miss Maya,

Do you think that Sayo would ever be able to catch on to some of Chisato’s issues and adapt her behavior to make things easier for her? I feel like it’d probably be too big a task for her, but not impossible with enough time and help from others.

Regardless, what I really wanted to pick your brain on is Chisato’s reaction upon realizing that Sayo is being considerate and mindful around her. Or even that she’s doing it in a way that’s helping her change and grow.

Would the revelation that someone is changing her for the better scare her? Enrage her? How would the thought of her girlfriend seemingly walking on eggshells around her make her feel? It feels like it’d be a juicy moment where she recontextualizes a lot of Sayo’s actions.

Then again, I only know of these young ladies through your postings on their escapades, which is why I am eager to hear your thoughts.

Hello anon!

Sayo would definitely catch on yes. Much of my posting focuses on Chisato because I'm ill about her, but really I think even with just canon, Chisato and Sayo are more similar then they are different. Both are people hiding very particular feelings of inadequacy or meaninglessness behind their masks. Of course, Chisato's are more varied and complex, but that only works better because Sayo is an honest girl and I believethat would help her see past Chisato's walls a little bit. As for Maya headcanons, Sayo could, if not exactly know, be able to very accurately guess a lot of the particular feelings of predatoriness that basically subsume Chisato's being when it comes to sex and romance in my mind. And Sayo would 100% try to help her, even if they were just friends, I think. She's a kind and earnest girl.

As for how Chisato would react, well I think Chisato is deeply aware of how unhealthy a lot of her mindset is, but it's just not something she can let go of, or perhaps it's only in certain moments of lucidity that she can acknowledge how not good it is. Like, obviously Chisato is aware she's surrounded by a bunch of gay girls, that at least amongst her peer group it is a normal and accepted thing right? But she can't shake the constant need to perform a certain kind of cishetro femininity that has been her grounding point and also defense for so long but also has rubbed off onto what core self of her's there is. And then like other general, perhaps you could say BPD problems with relationships she'd have right, like Chisato has been an actress for a long time, and though part of her hatred of it stems from her ever constant need to wear and develop new masks one after another until whatever 'Chisato' is supposed to be is slowly lost, I think perhaps there are other parts of the job that she does not like. Like she's most certainly been treated as a sex object to some level for a while I feel like, I mean even just pastel pallettes has some bikini events I think, but certainly there is very little chance that this hasn't been the case before as well right like Chisato is used to being desired in a way that is purely objectifying, so she is probably aware that her reaction to a relationship that is not that would most certainly not be healthy. Like her, for example, getting upset when she perceives Sayo as not finding her attractive or mocking her apperance or something like that is sprung from her own ideas about her worth that have formed because of all this constant proping up as an object of beauty and dwsire that has been done to her, so like if Sayo isn't 100% attracted to her, it must be over because what else does Chisato have, she's barely even a real person. But she'd also be aware enough that she knows that this is an unhealthy thing for their relationship right, she knows she's overreacting but she can't help it as it were.

Would Chisato be upset if she realized Sayo was trying to help her? I don't think so, at least not like a normal type of upset. I think a part of her would be in disbelief that Sayo cares even that much about her, another part cursing herself for manipulating Sayo into trying to fix something that is unfixable, another part desperate to repay Sayo in some way for it, and another part that just genuinely loves Sayo even more because of her care. She would certainly be uspet by her ever constant revelation that she is, as you put it, making Sayo walk around on egg shells, which only unfortunately makes those eggshells more prominent. That's the thing, it's all feeding into itself and it's making it worse and better it's a complicated thing is what I'm getting at, their relationship I mean.

But it certainly is not hopeless. I need to get around to writing the ChisaSayo fic, but in my mind their relationship starts purely sexual, becomes romantic and they start dating, and then Sayo starts trying to rope Chisato into her hobbies. And I genuinely think that's probably one of the most important things she could do for Chisato, both because the reassurance it would offer of Sayo introducing her to all the different parts of her life and also because Chisato needs some hobbies, needs things outside of acting, to better differentiate her sense of self from her masks as it were. And I think she'd be very glad to do it by Sayo's side as well.

[ashyswoyaus]

Wait is Dominator going to be a part of your wander and Sylvia swap au? How would s2 play out?

yes definitely!!! i think s2 would play out with pretty much the same general story beats as the show, mostly the same arcs and tentpole episode premises. then there comes the question of How you would make them work in this swap

instead of wander's eagerness to be friends and belief in redemption, sylvia's actions would be fueled by the thrill of adventure. while i wouldn't say she has the original's full backstory—she was never a bounty hunter—it's still something she loves, and perhaps even Because she doesn't have that full backstory it's something she craves more. for the most part she'd have been satisfied with just hater during s1—but at the same time it becomes so routine and hater barely even registers as a Real threat anymore (especially considering wander's the one that deals with the watchdogs) that she can't help feeling the desire for something New and Exciting.

so when dominator shows up, she immediately latches onto that and decides, well i can't just let this new guy do whatever they want, i've got to go and show them what's what Right Now. of course she gets humbled pretty quickly, but that drive to defeat dominator is what leads her to set up the battle royale. although sylvia shares the plan with wander beforehand and they work things out together. sylvia can't get to dominator when she's on her ship, so the plan is put in motion to lure her out and ambush her (and hopefully, fighting with the other villains first would weaken her a bit)

it still comes down to hater and dominator, and hater still forms a crush on her. sylvia doesn't think anything will come of it, of course, but she's trying to somehow use this to her advantage. i have quite a Bit about my fair hatey in my head which i want to make something of later

it also helps i think with giving her more parallels to hater...she gets so Focused on the Adventure that is Defeating Dominator that it's almost like an obsession and she might lose sight of her other goals. i worry about it maybe being too out of character because she isn't Normally super obsessive, especially compared to the others...but this was the most satisfying way i could think of to do it. like wander was fixated on getting hater and dominator together sylvia is fixated on Defeating Dominator (and internally wanting to Be the One that Does It). she wants to kill her so bad.

and i had these doodles i might as well take about wander and peepers briefly as well. their teamup would happen like 5 minutes earlier because wander would NOT skip out on that hug. you started walking towards me with your arms outstretched boy YOU ARE GETTING HELD!!!!

wander is not one to take pride in enemyship. the moment peepers relates to him about stress and had a moment of softness his fate was sealed. wander is his friend now. peepers doesn't want to admit it out loud but he knows deep down, and almost begrudgingly accepts it

and i didn't notice until after i made it but this is the second time i've drawn wander holding a watchdog and worrying about them getting cold...so i think this would be a funny part of his character. wander is so so worried about the watchdogs because they are small and furless no wonder they wear all black it must be so hard for them to retain heat. space is freezing. he would know. get some warmth!!! (he'll bite if you don't)