#like okay look at my life choices
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Life is too short.
[ my art ] [ twitter ]
(detail + ratio rambling under the cut >_>)
This is one of those "I need a break between my ten other illustrations, let me do a lil sketchy sketch :D" that got too ambitious etc. etc. I never want to see the color red again" moments. BUT!
I really, really like to explore Ratio's viscerality and what's happening between his brain and his nerves, like... all of this thorough control and discipline and he still has to breathe and react to himself and his surroundings, you know? His accomplishments are insane for "his age"* but he's going to run out of "age" at some point! His ambitions are so far reaching that he's not worried about getting doctorate degree Number Nine! Rather, his efforts are pointed outwards, into the universe, for the universe. As you know.
Speaking of his degrees, I had a half thought a while ago that we've seen him with two types of laurel pins.
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One is him in his suuuuuper cute mother goose avatar (three leaves) and the other is the hat he's wearing everywhere else (eight leaves).
The thought was, "Aww, what if they're like commemorative pins counting the number of his degrees or whatever :)". Literally only because there's eight in the current one. This is kind of silly because then you'd HAVE to have an obscene number of degrees even for a normal person for your leaf pin to start looking like a laurel in the first place so scratch that BUT it's cute to think that it's still academic regalia. Something something I work in higher ed myself and it's like... it's like that.
The university goldsmith appreciates the job security.
I REMEMBER WHY I BROUGHT THAT UP. FOLLOWING the fantasy where more leaves = more knowledge!, in summary, even though Ratio seems to be a little beyond trying to get a prize every time he learns something now. But he does want to Keep Going. He can only Keep Going.
So I drew him in a bathtub full of an uncountable amount of gold leaves looking at the camera with an indescribable expression born from a hunger that will never be satiated lol DETAIL SHOT!
*Referenced only vaguely in a comment in the context of astonishment, but it could have easily have been "woah he's accomplished so much for his age (young)" as it could be "woah he looks good for his age (older)". There is no canon age and even then, reconciling standardized system time versus planetary time versus "does his particular breed of lizard human have the same lifespan as tumblr user nhura?" is a losing game for everyone involved! Here's what I think: I think he started going grey in his early twenties, whatever that means in spacefantasygame, and that that's very cute on him.
Do YOU think Ratio would be tempted by immortality???? Or would he MIND HIS BUSINESS
#dr ratio#dr. ratio#hsr fanart#veritas ratio#hsr#my art#SORRY FOR THE INSANE COLOR CHOICE I feel bad posting this in ratio circles because normal ratio art is pleasing on the eye.#blue and gold and white. some ivory. tan sometimes. like fresh air on a brisk day#not piss christ is what i'm saying#in my defense his eyes look like that anyway so this is actually Topical.#I want to talk about Ratio's self image and relationship to his own flesh but that's for another day. unless you ask me niceys#my art: hsr#honkai star rail#holding up a sign that says I LIKE THAT RATIO'S PHYSICAL BODY IS BOTH A CONTINUOUS PROJECT AND LABOR OF PERFECTION WHILST BEARING THE CONSE#THE CONSEQUENCES OF HIS EXTRAORDINARY LIFE#PART 3: why does ratio not have an art degree? it's simpler than you think.#okay i'm done BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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girls when their issues get dismissed as anxiety for the millionth time
#futaba sakura#persona 5#p5r#p5#fanart#futabadoodles#chat i am SO losing it#went to get diagnosed w adhd wasnt diagnosed because and i quote “it could be anxiety” omfg#neurotypical psychiatrists especially white ones die in a hole 🥰#also because i “wasnt struggling enough”#like hi so i have this thing called emotional intelligence a good support system and access to coping skills hope that helps!#god forbid a neurodivergent person has tools to manage their condition and isnt in hell everyday i guess!#hate her ass!!!!!!!#i wasnt looking to get diagnosed for medication or support bc i already use a lot of like adhd specific supports and shit#and w accommodations my anxiety diagnosis can cover what i need for the most part so it was rlly just a validation/confirmation thing#like idk yeah. i am managing. im not particularly struggling. because ive been selfdx for a while and have implemented changes in my life#and i happen to be in a very very good place rn and im very lucky. so like. ???#rlly felt like “you have all the symptoms but youre not struggling enough with anything to be able to diagnose ypu” ok thanks fuck you#cuz ppl w adhd can manage being unmedicated by choice i js wasnt officially diagnosed before i guess its deemed “okay” to not live in hell!#dunno im frustrated. i have difficulties but i manage them well and i am very lucky to live an easy life for now so like 😭??
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fake psychic Tim but its just. its just psych. Jason dies and batman goes off the deep end so Tim (instead of becoming robin) starts going ham on the 'tips to the police' bc if the police can deal with the smaller crimes then Tim doesn't have to worry about batman killing a petty thief.
Except he's running himself into the ground and he starts getting sloppy bc he's giving the local police info, and bludhaven info (bc dick) AND probably giving Nightwing info when he can and someone catches him or he leaves a paper trail and then Officer Dick Grayson apprehends him and takes him in for questioning and Tim is like "you can't talk to me without my parents or a lawyer present, I'm a minor. And my parents are in Guatemala, so you better call my lawyer."
and Dick is like "kid you're not in trouble i just need to know who's giving you this information." Because there is NO WAY this kid isn't working with someone. Someone who is using a child to drop off information, which while noble to help the police, is putting this child in danger and tim is like, pretty offended actually. That it's being implied that he COULDN'T do this himself.
So he's like "im not working for anyone."
and Dick is like "you have to be getting the info from somewhere. I just wanna help."
and Tim is like AUGH ADULTS "I just- i figured it out on my own" and its CLEAR that Dick doesn't believe him which is, first off, super insulting, never meet your heroes, and second he shouldn't be talking anyway or admit that he goes out at night or Dick will do something stupid like try to make him stop. So he's like (rolling eyes) "I'm psychic. Are you happy? Can I have my phone call now?"
#batman#tim drake#Cue Dick ALMOST not buying it but he's like 'okay kid'#if you're psychic prove it.#And Tim is like oh he thought i was serious??? Uh#“you're favorite animal is a bat.“ And Dick looks at him confused but then sorta pales a little and is like ”... what.”#and tim is like “and you really like nighttime... walks.”#And Dick like turns off the recording and is like “kid what are you saying to me”#and Tim is like “I know you're Nightwing. The ... spirits told me.”#and honestly it's more believable that a 12 year old kid is psychic than that he figured out who Nightwing was on his own#ted talks#anyways lots of fun hijinks can ensue. Tim is technically a security rick and even though dick REALLY doesn't wanna talk to bruce#he should tell him about this... psychic child#Which can just be more questions and Tim answering them and is like#if i wasn't psychic how would i know this.#and Bruce.... doesn't know. So they have no choice but to believe him#psych tim au#also including: bruce being like “.... can you tell my son (jason) i love him?”#tim would actually be pretty good on the field with moments notice observations#he's been trained his whole life to read people at parties and know what they want from him and what they mean#regular people are MUCH easier to read than the elite who say everything backhanded and all have like poised masks of perfection#raye was telling me their psychic tim au and i was like 'ok but what if just psych'#catch us out here both writing separate fake psychic tim aus
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i saw somebody comment on how the classic who companions don't get to change outfits enough and i agree. i need to play dressup dolls with them STAT!!!
#you know at first i thought tegan wearing heels all the time was a classic 'no writer/costumer communication' problem.#but they drew so much attention to it i feel like its definitely a character choice. and makes perfect sense with her stubborness#the way she lives her life in a permanent state of 'oh well i wont be staying long. no need to get comfortable' yknow.#n. e. ways.... i've already made a few alt nyssa outfits. ive gotta make more tegans...#i was caught so off guard seeing turlough's ken doll looking ass short jumpsuit. like okay .... i enjoy it. just not what i was expecting#and adric.... man..... what is he wearing to begin with anyways... and they never let his ass change clothes... idek what to do w him#lol#anyways#.txt#wait until i get my hands on all the other characters. this is just the 5th doctor ones man.....#we stopped before the 5 doctors special. felt right#and we're starting from the veeeeery beginning
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Friendly stranger in the library who has flagged me down and left his study cubicle to talk to me: How do you read so many books? I'm struggling to finish this one book and I want to work up to that many someday.
Me, with my armload full of children's and YA fantasy and novel-in-verse that I chose because they were short/easy-to-read/had lots of pictures: Um....
#I SWEAR! MOST OF THIS IS COVERS AND WHITE SPACE!#lovely young man who left me utterly mortified#i fled the library immediately#AND THEN WHEN I WAS COMING DOWN THE STAIRS!#ANOTHER RANDOM STRANGER!#COMMENTED THAT I WAS GOING TO BE READING A LOT!#NO ONE EVER TALKS TO ME IN THIS LIBRARY WHAT IS HAPPENING??#look people i have been building up a reading list#and i'm trying to explore a new genre#i left about half of the things on my list behind#i should have told them that i finish maybe half but more like a quarter of what i check out from the library#but maybe that's balanced out by the stuff i read in ebook/my own personal stash#now i'm rethinking all my life choices and finding this equal parts hilarious and mortifying okay bye
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Yes Hello to all my fellow Miss Lemon fans out there:
If you love her as much as I do, then 6.2 Hickory Dickory Dock is the episode for you
Now let us all just take a moment out of our busy day to bask in her glory:
That coat with those hats?? ICONIC she has such a flawless style
and this little scene where she's like 'this is just a quirk of Mr. Poirot's, don't worry about it' fellas help she's so cute
also HELP lads she took Poirot's comment about Inspector Japp's 'healthy appetite' way too literally!! LEMON SOLE! she's so funny aagh
Also she looks really damn good in burgundy wow
Also you know I hate the trope where guys tell ladies to take their glasses off and let their hair flow in the wind because they'd somehow be 'sexier' or whatever. That is just simply not true. Case in point: Look at how cute Miss Lemon is in her glasses!!
Just. Everyone just. Look at my favourite girl. Look at her!!! Her filing system is perfect! Her filing system could kick your ass!!!
#Okay. don't kill me. but I'm gonna say it.#She has red/auburn hair. Which we all know is a weakness of Hastings'.#so like. Why didn't the showrunners kinda push them together more?#like in the books Miss Lemon was supposed to be 'impossibly ugly' or whatever the quote was#but show!Felicity is cute and adorable and beautiful and lovely and flawless and okay sorry I'll stop. but anyway. My point is#they get this absolute gorgeous cutie to play Miss Lemon and made her sorta exactly Hastings' type and then they don't do anything with it?#No implications like we get with him and Poirot? No touching or preening or lingering glances or smiles?#Sure in the Adventure of the Italian Nobleman Hastings legit punches a guy in the face for her#but she's not there to see it!#and we sorta get a whumpy scene in Double Clue where she's tending to his wounds with iodine so they could have played that up#esp. if they were really trying to no homo everything.#but they didn't. like. he barely looks at her in that scene.#And maybe they were just trying to stay truer to the source material but like. They still could have *implied* a great deal#and they didn't. IDK it was just. an interesting choice is all#they certainly imply a lot of things about him and Poirot (for which I owe them my life LOL) so it probably would have been super easy to d#maybe they were afraid of pissing off the fans? idk#or maybe those Hastings/Poirot implications were a simple result of the exceptional acting chemistry b/w David Suchet and Hugh Fraser#which of course fits into the canon of Poirot having the absolute biggest soft spot for Captain Arthur Hastings that is humanly possible#ANYWAY I LOVE YOU MISS LEMON YOU ARE MY QUEEN#and like okay I guess I can see how Pauline Moran isn't '''''''conventionally attractive''''''' or anything#but given the right storyline I could see Hastings being down bad for her version of Felicity Lemon#but maybe that's just because *I'm* down bad for her LOL#Poirot series#Poirot#Felicity Lemon#Miss Lemon#back on my screencapping bullshit#also if you made it through all of these tags bless u what a trooper you are thanks for listening to my ramblings
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"The supposedly sealed memories of a miniature garden"
#dgm#d.gray-man#alma karma#kanda yuu#okay im going to word vomit my concept abt this apologies in advance#anyw ik Wisely gives the opportunity to mind-read/access memories like we see in the 3rd exorcist arc#but i think Road wldve been another interesting choice. i rlly like the concept of dream n its used a lot in that arc#we see a lot fo Kanda's original life within his dreams and illusions which is Road's specialty#just like constructing this false reality idk I've talked abt the idea of Kanda being put to sleep many times before but never properly#inspection style like idk maybe they still look like kids running in this like. perfect place that illusion of the word that Alma read abou#Allen waddling through a lake's worth of lotus with Road instead of the labs!#idk...........some parts are so deep he falls in and those r pockets of memories u know bc i still want that#and the deeper and closer he gets the water gets murky and red#u know bc im cool and love cheesy symbolism#I want Allen to bargain with Alma and Alma to just be like. sweet and charming and laugh it off until Allen gets to the root of the problem#WAIT U KNOW IN LIKE SAILOR MOON WHEN THE SCOUTS DIE (that is not a spoiler i promise) and they're wrapped in thorns?#I wanna draw that w Kanda....deep under the water#but he has to want to wake up from that dream. I'm playing off the fact that Allen had to punch him to snap him outta it#anyway....im done its okay
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my rook is so funny. extremely boring normal ex criminal who joined the wardens in his 30s to avoid going to prison. feels no alliance to his faction at all but is a little freak who enjoys taking orders so he does well. meets varric who instantly projects act 1 marcus onto him for no real reason other than they're both kind of assertive guys he has to work with and wants to fuck. has no idea who marcus is and assumes "hawke" is a recent ex varric isn't over. enters a weird situationship with him because hooking up with a weird older dwarf is more fun than being a warden. suddenly finds himself in charge at the lighthouse and starts acting like an old grizzled commander even though he and neve are like the same age. kind of wants to die so he doesn't care about anything that's happening but he'll see it through until the end because that's his Job.
#veilguard spoilers#minor. but i dont want to get yelled at.#the choices theyve made for a lot of rook's characterisation is wild so he HAS to be a freak#he and harding must be close in age. why did her personal quest feel like he was a middle aged dad chaperoning a#teenager from life is strange#to be clear he and varric didnt fuck. varric got scared.#he gave him a MIRROR? . extremely funny with the trans option bc in my head it went down like. varric has recently#Found out marcus is trans and was struggling with it a lot when they first met (which is why he was Like That a lot) and has a million#terrible flashbacks to all the jokes he made when they were bantering that were actually probably really hurtful#(marcus doesnt remember or care)#so when he finds out rook is trans and struggling with it which is why he's Like That he panics and gives him a gay ass mirror#and is like 'to remind you of who you are :) a man in the maker's eyes' and rook is like (looking at varric's tits) “😐👍🏻 okay.”
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The way people sometimes refuse to acknowledge that writing choices that clearly go against established canon should mean something is endlessly frustrating to me. We don't have to agree on the interpretation, but these writing choices SHOULD mean something.
Otherwise, it's shitty writing.
#'the ga wouldn't even notice'#'the character doesn't seem to mind'#'you're reading too much into things'#no actually the fact that so many people think writing doesn't have to involve any stylistic or thematic choices to build meaning#and that writers just do stuff and as long as the character doesn't say anything it couldn't possibly mean anything is absurd#like y'all can pick up any classic piece of literature and think the writing just manifested on the page#and nothing is any deeper than some author saying what happened to a character like the character's just recounting real-life events#and that nothing really means anything except exactly what is said outright or some shit#but that's not how good writing works#in any form of media#and if the blatant contradictions are not being addressed then maybe the writing is shitty actually#and also even IF something wasn't intended to mean anything by the author directly doesn't mean that no meaningful connotations exist#for the audience like jesus christ y'all#i get enough of this bullshit from my students i don't need it in fandom too#let people analyze things and dig into them and spec and 'look too deeply' it's fun#and also it's okay if someone has a different interpretation than you and wants to talk about the possibilities behind that interpretation#or about other possible interpretations#it is not hurting you to see someone 'read too much into something' let people have their opinions#without trying to shut down everything you disagree with goddamn#anyway#911 discourse#fandom negativity#and actually i do think it's mostly shitty writing at this point#but that doesn't make it not mean anything that it's shitty writing actually#and it shouldn't be viewed as some awful character flaw for someone to point out why certain choices don't make sense#and to talk about what they would like to see addressed because of that
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a man forced to suffer the skittle shenanigans of this team
#bombastic side eye#i love mikksy half of the time can find a camera to stare into#or just eyes the zest with so much judgement#“no luosty you may have made a it looks bigger joke that does not mean you get a free pass to stare at my eyes”#“no ekky scf means we cant do the bumpy ritual like we're supposed stop being a freak about it”#“so it wasnt enough to do a shoey each with lundy we have to share a sandal with luosty? okay”#“why must i be punsihed for being intro-ed first why did these chucklefucks have to sit next to me”#“i finally make it stateside and this is what i get greeted with...”#you can tell hes slowly regretting all his life choices thats lead him here#this is what happens when your 2 boyfriends sign with another team and leave mikksy alone with only 1 boyfie#he suffers
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#well I just submitted my essay for my history class so I'm finally done with finals#I wish I felt happier or relieved or something but I don't. I feel awful. my body hurts from the incredible amount of tension/anxiety I had#trying to finish it before 11:59. I submitted it at 11:55. I have never come that close before and I hate it#the amount of anxiety I had you'd think the deadline was hunting me for sport#and what's worse is I felt all this anxiety and put all this work into it and I'm not even happy about it#I spent two days trying to figure out what he wanted us to write about because apparently he just seems to be really bad at instructions#like I thought maybe it was just me overthinking but I spent two hours talking to my mom about it and in the end even she couldn't figure i#so then I had only two days to gather notes make an outline write an essay. while burnt out and barely able to focus.#and while not knowing exactly what I was doing like is this what he wants. is it not. who knows I literally don't have time left#to figure it out I just need to write something and hope it works#but I hate being unsure it makes everything harder#especially because I really wanted to make a good grade. this was the class where I made a 78 on my midterm#which brought my class grade to a B but I'd been able to get it back to an A and I'd be able to keep it if I got like an 80ish on the final#the essay turned out okay idk if it's what he wanted but whatever at least I got the other requirements like word count and sources#but the CITATIONS...we had to use chicago which I'd never used before and let me just say. mla is the love of my life after this.#actually chicago might not be that bad if I got used to it I think my violence should be directed toward every word processor#that links footnotes. it is so STUPID that there isn't an easier way to make them different#if it hadn't been for trying to figure out footnotes on google docs I could've submitted it like ten minutes earlier#and with phenomenally less stress#I eventually had to make a choice as to what I'd give up: (1) submitting it on time (2) perfect citations or (3) word doc#which is what he wanted it submitted as#except when I tried that thank goodness I looked at the preview before I submitted it because I saw that it'd messed up the citations#I ended up submitting it as a pdf. on time. with perfect (maybe) (I didn't have time to double check) citations. but not as a word doc.#is it the end of the world? idk probably not but not meeting a professor's requirements is like. anathema.#all of that is to say that I'm going to cry and then let it go and get to bed and just. idk. I've reached that point where#I'm so tired and numb that it feels like I'll never feel better#anyway#maybe I hurt because of my meds and the side effects decided to kick in now because the grace of God held them back long enough#for me to finish#earl crow ramblings
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covert npd is awesome and i want to live and i’m going to listen to song about pirates
#the crier#forgot the tag. sorry. please block that if you’re not comfortable with this#i’m sorry i’ll draw something soon later i promise i’m sorry#i can’t even rethink my life choices because honestly i would’ve found some other thing to absolutely wreck myself over and it’d basically#be the same thing. i don’t want to just. rot or something anymore. i do not want rest. i do not want a break and to come back when i feel#better. i want to stop feeling entirely. i want to be nothing again and not in worth but in how i exist. i do not want to exist anymore#it doesn’t even feel like they hate me. it’s just that everything i did was nothing. i hate that it was nothing. i hate that i loved so muc#and it was nothing. that was everything i was. what else do i have but what i made. it’s everything to me and nothing to everyone#they are everything to me and to everyone they are just ‘okay’. you won’t talk about it again. you won’t think of it again#if my creations could feel they would not care so why do i have to. i want to say it’s the creations that make me happy but its the attenti#ion. i don’t know. i don’t want to rely on it. seeing them makes me happy but it’s nothing anymore once i realize nobody cares but me#this isn’t even a real fucking issue. i’m fine realistically i should be good as long as i don’t make another issue for myself#i just don’t know though. the issue is me and well by extending my life i am basically harming everyone else. maybe my creations deserve#to be looked over because they are helping something that shouldn’t be here exist. i wish i didn’t exist. i hate myself i don’t know#it’s just. i’m worthless. i have no real reason to be here other than to annoy people. if people don’t love what i made then i will have to#face that my existence isn’t worth anything. i won’t HAVE to live anymore. and i want to live but at the same time if i don’t have to be#here then why should i fight against myself? i don’t even know what i would say i don’t want to entertain the possibility so i keep fightin#i just want to live i want to live so fucking bad and i can only live if they exist and if you see them too#a real death would mean nothing to me but i’m dead the second anyone looks away and i’m scared andi’m sweating and i hate this an#i’m going to bed now#idk i just want to add if someone’s reading this i’m never insincere when i compliment something that’s better than me. it’s better than wh#at i did that’s why i’m complimenting it. it’s just i wish that i was as good too
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Idk if I'm gonna be able to articulate this on the fly like first thing in the morning, but. I think my ENTIRE body of work is This: Examining how family ties, bonds or lack thereof, the good and bad AND ugly, seep into every facet of who we are and how we come to interact with others. How sometimes, a family tie (or again, a Lack of one), will sometimes bleed into how you act and treat specific people. Will bleed into how you CONNECT with those people (or, will be the very reason you fail to do so).
HOWEVER. HOWEVER. THERE IS A DELICATE LINE. A BALANCING ACT. You CANNOT just simply attribute fanon flavored ideas of found family to such characters. That's too simple, and sometimes, is a complete disservice to the specific character you're working with. I am once again bringing up Chilchuck. YES, him being a dad Absolutely seeps into how he treats his party. But if you call him the party's dad, you're Insane. Do you know ANYTHING ABOUT THAT MAN???? He would prefer you didn't. But I digress. He strikes a fascinating balance, between having The Qualities and ESPECIALLY expressing his care for his party in a Really Specific divorced (separated.) father of three fashion, but that does Not make him a "dad friend". He's a professional. He's on business. He's going home at the end of the day, and at the end of this adventure he's thinking of setting up a shop. I wanted to keep this more vague and broad but like. The Chilchuck example REALLY DOES perfectly articulate What I'm trying to get at, here. He's the perfect encapsulation of How his family shapes him, how that bleeds into his relationships with others, vs Who he is as a person.
How we were raised, our family ties, whether you adhere to it or you've fallen FAR from the tree -- you still fell from that stupid fucking tree. It's in your blood. Literally. It gave you shape, whether you liked it or not. And sometimes some things just set off weird domino effects, that also affect us irrevocably forever.
WHICH IS. TO SAY. I have no fucking idea what I'm talking about. I'm always trying to figure that out. Found family is/can be real, you're not strictly bound by blood if you don't wanna be. BUT. The bullshit I'm constantly on, is trying to figure out how to balance all that without slotting everyone into reductive roles. I'm gay and I seek to destroy the nuclear family. Not attempt to recreate nuclear family 2.0. You CAN reconstruct What Family Is/Means from the ground up, but you have to accept that things are going to get Weird. Because you're Queer. You are fundamentally incompatible with the status quo and normalcy, the solution is NOT assimilation and palatability, the solution is to just. Get weirder. And be fluent in canon. Okay. I love you
#my notes#why am i becoming chilchuck's spokesperson. chilchuck defender.#well i can fucking tell you! it's because my dad is a divorced father of FIVE. with a drinking problem so bad#that if he didn't quit it would have killed him. and guess what! i can tell you a few things about alfonse.#the way alfonse strives to be just like gustav. idealizing him ect ect. and the way i just wanna grab him by the shoulders#and SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. snap him out of repeating the cycles by the power of friendship and gay sex#it SUCKS ASS TO SAY IT IN THE SAME BREATH. I HATE THIS AS MUCH AS YOU DO.#but if you (my own brother) are gonna end up Just Like Your Father could you at least go all the way. get divorced. for the love of god#get divorced. oh my god okay oversharing hour but the WAY. THE WAY. dad once told me#[my brother's now ex wife far as i know thank god it finally happened bu my god it took WAY too long]#but the way my dad told me once [my brother's ex wife] reminded him a bit of his second wife.#oh my god i didn't even tell you the famous dad lore. he's been divorced three times. he is THE EPIC DIVORCE MAN.#like when i look at chilchuck i go. i know this man personally. i live with him.#alfonse's case is. really. really way more complicated. like what i just said#truly is only the tip of the iceberg WHILE ALSO. SIMULTANEOUSLY. only being One Single Facet. to what he is to me.#BUT ALSO. CONSIDER. the Parallels i'm setting up between alfonse w gustav VS. moe and its mother.#okay i will not say more bc i'll talk forever. final piece i really want to throw out there is though#do you think anna's situation w her family business being The Basis of how she connects w others#do you think the WAY she and all the other annas were Raised is like. comparable to religion actually?#and ESP like. i don't know if there's any hard and fast rules or anything but she and all her sisters ARE.#PRESUMABLY. RAISED A V SPECIFIC WAY. to be highly competitive cut-throat merchants.#what does this mean for COMMANDER anna. one of (if not ONLY?) instance of an anna who fell outside of that.#also is it agab dependant? could you be amab and then later on become an anna if that's what#oh my god i'm thinking of that ratatouille post. accepting of your gender identity but NOT of your Life Choice to be a chef.#is it. exactly like that. and if you're afab and end up being trans do you just fall to the wayside?#like the point is NOT to inject transphobia in here. the point is to ask Okay HOW THE HELL DOES ANY OF THIS WORK???????#bc the Implications go INSANE. and also the point is to ask what is the funniest answer possible to any of the questions#I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN. AND BE INSANE.#like final clarification i only say religion bc that's what i'm familiar with (specifically christainity)#but maybe it's more apt -- a different flavor of traditional family culture that has strict gender roles.
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let it be known…. bestie!sukuna does a killer winged eyeliner
#sharp enough to cut a man and that’s his goal i just know he does the meanest winged eyeliner for you in class#you hand him the pen w/o saying a word and he’s immediately grabbing the back of your head to steady you#if suguru sees that he’s like What Thw Fuck Is going onnimm gonna be Sick#firmly believe that reader & everyone in school has a mini crush on sukuna#i say mini bc he is so fucking sexy but the moment he opens his mouth you’re like damn… i regret all my life choices why’s he yelling at me#anyways. reader is the only one who can tolerate sukuna and vice versa <3 reader is friendly so everyone loves them#but like. BEST FRIEND wise? it’s sukie & reader til death does them part 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼 i love them so much idk why their dynamic makes me so happy#okay i’m just talking to myself in the tags rn hmmm how do i want him to look#pink hair + black undercut OBVIOUSLY. face tatts/body tatts OBVIOUSLY.#ear piercings + helix + industrials + eyebrow piercing + nose piercing + snake bites + tongue piercing OBVIOUSLY#he’d also wear reading glasses. FKN nerd 😹😹😹 i have 20/20 vision i can’t relate 🤭🤭🤭#immaculately dressed & insanely intelligent you can call sukuna a lot of things but you can’t call him ugly or dumb#i think he’d have reader’s birth flower tattooed on him too just as a nod to how much he loves/cares for them <3#where should he work… maybe at the same tattoo shop as suguru? yeah maybe that could work#sukie’ll be a piercer while sugu is a tattooist yeah that checks out#maybe they’re in the same frat? yeah that could work part 2#okay YAY cool i’m glad i’m fleshing him out :3#snippets#personal
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Maybe I'm just cursed 🤪
#trigger warning for everything that follows in these tags btw#i am in need of some venting into the void#so im gonna vent#so uh#im almost out of time to find a new job before i have to leave my flat and move back with my parents#in the past 27 days ive filled in 189 job applications#6 of those led to interviews#so far 5 of those have been rejections#i even started looking at jobs that paid way less than i can feasibly live on just so i could at least cover rent and stay here but no luck#anyway thats already sucky#and then ive had to go off my adhd meds because of continuous and annoying fuck ups with my drs and im hesitant to work to fix it cause#might be moving counties anyway lol#my depression is the worst its ever been in about two years i struggle to want to exist day in and day out and#this morning i found out my dog - my baby who i dont live with because i moved cities - he lives with my parents#we found out he has an agressive cancer - and i have to now make choices i dont feel ready to make#and im just#do you ever feel like youre already one the ground but life wont stop kicking you#and i feel#so lonely#my friends are doing everything right my cousin who i live with is always checking in on me and i am still#convincing myself i am being a burden i am the problem i#my whole life is collapsing and i#even writing this all out in tags my brain is yelling at me for being an 'attention seeker' or smth and idk#i just wanna#idk#its complicated ig#im fighting#i am fighting so hard#i just want ppl to know im doing my best thats all#anyone who read all of this - hi - i hope youre having a beautiful day. its all going to be okay in the end 💛
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i do need people to stop saying jess sexually assaulted rory if you wanna say ATTEMPTED i'll let you have it even though that's really not what happened but he did not actually assault her
#gilmore girls#so gross to me honestly when people don't bat an eye at some of the other things that happen on that show#yet will say that scene was an actual assault like yes it is a bad scene but it is not to that level#and omg they also said he left her three times like no he left her once. if you count season 2 that was not entirely by choice#and season 4 like. well whether you're looking at 4x13 or 4x21 he's leaving a person he already hasn't been around for months#doesn't really count as the same kind of abandonment lol#and 4x21 she basically told him to leave hello#i gotta stop looking at ig comments but that wasn't even a post about them!!#also saw someone on that same post say luke was controlling LIKE GIRL WHAT#of all the men on that show#you could argue him being like that wrt chris but literally their conversation is#'i'm never gonna be okay with christopher in your life' 'i'm always gonna have christopher in my life'#the end like it hurts him but he never tells her she can't see him lmao
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