#like not even a bad you might find it funny

[rarepairdumpster]

Pretty Woman AU Part 1

Pairing: Viktor/Silco (Arcane) Rating: M C/W: AGE REVERSAL, Sex Work, SW Discrimination, Oral Sex, Bad Piano Hygiene

Viktor is an older, richer, well-dressed business man and Silco is the young, feisty street corner prostitute with a sweet streak and plans for his future, if he could just get enough cash together.

Silco, with his hair soft and loose, and wearing the skimpiest clothes imaginable, leaning in through the window of Viktor's adapted car and smirking like he has the filthiest secret.

"What's your name?"

"What do you want it to be?" And Silco just looking up at Viktor through his lashes.

And Viktor can't get over how beautiful those eyes are. Not quite sky blue, tinged with the faintest green.

His eyeliner makes them pop. And he's absolutely wearing lipstick.

Omg the amount of pearl clutching when Viktor brings Silco into the hotel.

And normally someone like Silco wouldn't be permitted, but Viktor owns the penthouse and he is very rich.

Silco being amused when Viktor gives him his coat at first, but then he understands why, and Silco looks at the concierge like he wants to stab him.

Definitely still teases the old couple at the elevator.

The old woman's kinda into it though, which he thinks is hilarious.

Silco also walks much better in those boots and they're much higher heeled.

It makes his ass do a sexy sway, and Viktor eyes him once Silco takes the coat back off once they reach the penthouse level.

Silco is so surprised that someone wants him for the whole night. He hasn't even gotten someone that wanted to take him further than the nearest alley.

Silco avoids looking at Viktor for too long because the way Viktor looks at him makes him feel something and it's warm and uncomfortable.

Viktor can't take his eyes off Silco, even when he has to answer work calls and do paperwork. 

He watches him eat popcorn and chocolate covered strawberries with a startled happiness that makes Viktor feel somewhat ashamed --- that he has all this money, and owns this penthouse, and this boy has to sell himself to make ends meet.

Viktor feels like he should tell Silco to stop when he slides between his legs and starts to undress, but he can't seem to find the words.

He's struck by how good of an actor the boy must be, that Silco looks like he enjoys wrapping his mouth around him, hair falling forward to caress Viktor's legs and frame Silco's face like a pretty curtain.

Silco is just glad he doesn't have to act much. The man is far more handsome and kinder than his usual clientele, and with Viktor's size, he would gladly pay.

And it's obvious that Viktor takes care of himself. Cleans himself well. Trims. 

He's seen the crustiest dicks in his line of work, and this dick is just yum.

Silco kinda hoped they would fuck, but he'll take what he can get, and at least he's getting a nice payday without a sore ass.

Given how well he's being paid, Silco swallows Viktor's load without prompting.

Makes a show of licking the last smear from his lips while looking up at Viktor with those sexy bedroom eyes.

Viktor wishes for just a moment he didn't have a rule about kissing because all he can think of is tasting those spit-slick lips.

(Heimerdinger as the hotel manager. The idea of tiny Heimerdinger giving Silco a verbal scolding about how he dresses is so fucking funny.)

Viktor coming back to the penthouse to find Silco wearing the same old clothes, even though he'd asked him to go shopping, and a humiliated Silco raging about how he'd tried but a slut from a street corner isn't good enough to shop in those stupid, obnoxious boutiques. 

And Viktor going quiet before asking softly, "They said that to you?" 

"They might as well have."

Viktor calls to postpone dinner and takes him to a small shop where he knows the owner. 

Viktor is on the phone doing business while the little old lady takes Silco in the back to try on a few outfits.

Luckily Viktor turns around in time to see Silco come out in a black and red cocktail dress and he is knocked speechless for a moment.

The cocktail dress makes Silco's waist look *irrisistably* snatched

Viktor has to clear his throat and refocus on the phonecall, but not before he notices Silco's smug grin and his knowing gaze shooting downwards to Viktor's crotch

The next day, Viktor visits the boutiques where Silco was refused service, and he makes several tight-lipped complaints about how his associate was discriminated against by certain staff members (he names them all [Silco had an excellent memory for details]). They all get fired, and he walks out with complimentary gifts for his offended associate.

Silco catching Viktor playing piano and pausing in the doorway because shit that's so beautiful.

Also Silco is definitely naked under that robe.

Viktor muttering "This is so unhygienic" with a wry smile when he parts Silco's robe and finds him naked.

Silco nibbles on his lip for a moment before answering, "You can afford the cleaning bill." 

Viktor snorts a laugh and presses his face into Silco's belly.

And ohhh Silco does not expect Viktor to start to kiss his stomach and trail down his hips. 

And he certainly doesn't expect when Viktor takes Silco in his mouth, looking up at him with the same softness that seemed reserved just for him.

His knees almost buckle from the suddenness, the unexpectedness, but Viktor holds him up easily, one hand splayed over the small of his back and the other between his shoulder-blades.

No client has ever taken him in their mouth before.

Silco puts his hands in Viktor's hair, glad to muss the locks that always seemed perfectly in place. 

Silco is also now certain that if Viktor had a different background, he would have made an excellent whore.

Silco doesn't hold his groans back. Doesn't see the point. He is certain Viktor is more than aware of how good he is at giving head, given that Silco doesn't have a small dick either.

Viktor gets a rush hearing Silco fall apart above him, knowing that he can please him as well. He preferred mutually beneficial arrangements, after all.

Viktor moans when Silco's hands tighten in his hair, and Viktor goes with the slight twitch of Silco's fingers, letting Silco's cock slide into his throat.

Silco curses, the sound loud and harsh in the dim lighting.

He definitely wasn't expecting to be allowed deepthroat his client.

Silco is starting to learn that a lot about this arrangement isn't what he was anticipating when he agreed to the week. 

With Viktor taking him to the base, Silco gets closer faster and he starts to pull Viktor off of him when he feels his balls tighten.

Silco doesn't expect Viktor to swallow. Isn't sure if he wants him to, either. Given his job. Even though he's always so careful and gets tested regularly.

Viktor even surprises himself when he lets Silco cum down his throat with little hesitation. He knows it's dangerous, especially with someone like Silco, but he feels a trust like he hasn't ever felt, especially people of his own social standing.

Silco pants and pushes a hand back through his hair as he shakes his head. 

"I can't believe you just let me do that. I tried not to --"

Viktor cuts him off with a soft kiss and smiles.

"Don't worry about it."

Silco's face and chest flush from the kiss. Now THAT was not expected.

Viktor realizes his mistake almost immediately, and he jerks backwards, almost falling over the piano bench as he hastens to apologize.

Because he broke Silco's rule.

"It-Its okay," Silco whispers, touching his fingers to his lips.

"Just...don't it again," Silco hastens to add, looking away, because he knows if Viktor keeps looking at him the way he has been, if he let's Viktor kiss him again, Silco knows he'll fall in love.

And that's dangerous.

Clients don't fall for whores, and Silco doesn't want to suffer through an attachment with someone unattainable.

Part 2

Arch + Woods

[2ofpentacles]

An Extensive Character Analysis of Zelkov

You guys know that I'm a little unhinged about him, so have a lengthy examination of who he is and why he's like that.

Zelkov is an extremely unique, multilayered, and complex character. His supports are all excellent, ranging from funny to heartwarming to tragic. He had me from the moment he said, “It may appear as if I am sitting *mysteriously* by the fire, but I am actually cooking yams.” 

A few facts

His birthday is August 2nd. He’s 6’1”. His hobby is listed as “everything,” but he specifically likes reading, cooking, and sewing. His talents are “medicine and mystery.” His favorite foods are mostly carbs and potatoes. He hates being in the sun/heat and finds it exhausting. He carves a statue of Alear on the Somniel. The Ally Notebook describes his personality as “Meticulous and multitalented. Speaks in a *mysterious* way. Pursues activities passionately. Strong nurturing instinct.” I might add “extremely depressed, melodramatic, perfectionist workaholic.” So let’s break that down.

What’s his deal? The first thing you notice is that he emphasizes seemingly random words in his speech (also he never uses contractions). Why? For fun. As he says to Alear, “I may speak in a way that *suggests* a deeper meaning, but rarely is that actually the case. It is simply another way of “killing time.” Idle *amusement*, nothing more.” He also does it to appear more mysterious. The second thing you notice is his hobbies. Why does he have so many hobbies? To give him a reason to live. Again, as he says to Alear, “Once my work is done each day, I fill my evenings with these varied *pursuits*. As I *enjoy* them, I am always mindful to leave something unfinished for the next day. That ensures I always have a project. A reason to *continue* living.” He describes something as being “*fatally* boring.” With anyone else you would think it’s hyperbole, but with Zelkov you kind of wonder.

Additionally, he is a master at all his hobbies, as you see in many of his supports (such as Amber’s) or else he will work tirelessly until he does master it (as in Clanne’s). Of course he’s just as (if not more) serious about his job. As he tells Roy, “Our training begins now, Roy. It ends only when my body *collapses* from exhaustion.” He’s a perfectionist. He tells Camilla, “The thought of *failure* fills me with dread.” If he has to be healed frequently in battle, he’ll say, “That I should suffer so many *injuries* in battle is positively humiliating…”

The next thing you notice is his “strong nurturing instinct.” It’s particularly obvious when he’s interacting with children like Jean and Anna, and also Emblems that he thinks of as children, such as Tiki and Veronica. This often manifests as him giving them things (he also gives gifts to Ivy and Kagetsu). It’s most obvious in his support with Citrinne where he flips out about a bird he raised leaving the nest (he literally asks how he can keep living and is not over it by the end of the support chain), and then she asks him to write letters of advice to people struggling.

One of his characteristics that is less noticeable, but still very present if you look, is his lack of self worth. He calls himself a wretch in his support with Jean. He considers himself to be a bad influence on Alear. At Florra Mill Town he says, “Quite an *idyllic* scene, this. Someone like me is as wrong for this place as battle.” Most blatant is his bond conversation with Corrin. He says, “I have killed many people. So many, in fact, that I sometimes feel *violence* is all I am good for.” Corrin says, “If that were true, you would be a fundamentally bad person. I don’t think that’s the case.” He replies, “Your words are comforting, but I am afraid that is *precisely* the kind of person I am.” 

Now, as much as I’ve emphasized what a sweetheart he is, he can absolutely be ice cold. He’s not afraid to say exactly what he thinks (albeit very politely) in a cold, impersonal way as you can see in his support with Ivy. On the way back to Elusia, he says, “I have no issue with cutting down anyone in the Elusian army now. Not even the *familiar* faces.” In the DLC, he tells Fell Ivy, “I will end you now, and I will feel nothing.” (After she says that he can die for her again.)

There’s a reason why a lot of people start out scared of him. It doesn’t seem like he quite realizes this though. He doesn’t understand why Kagetsu thinks he dislikes him, and has to ask Yunaka about the impression he gives. Yunaka gives a good rundown. She says, “You’ve got the same killer instinct I do. It practically oozes from your pores. Like slime!” She describes his eyes as ice cold and calculating, and goes on to say, “Normal people don’t go around evaluating what folks’ lives are worth. That’s an assassin thing. You’re always probing for weaknesses too. Considering vectors of attack, right?” If he throws himself so entirely into his hobbies, you can imagine how intense he was about training to be an assassin. Which leads us to…

His history

The Ally Notebook tells us “From a wealthy family in a forest town of Elusia. Parents and younger brother were murdered by bandits.” In the Japanese version, it’s specified that his brother was his twin. We also learn from Jean’s support that Zelkov’s mother was a physician. It’s because of her he knows so much about medicine. We don’t know how old he was when his family was murdered, but he says that his mother has been dead for more than a decade. He swore revenge (he calls it his first pursuit) and became an assassin. He tells Alear, “A decade ago, my efforts bore their last fruit. All my family’s killers were vanquished.” If we’re considering his datamined age (28) to be accurate, that would put him at 18 when he accomplished his revenge. He continues to tell Alear that, “Once I had achieved my end, I suddenly became aware that I had nothing left. No purpose. It was King Hyacinth who rescued me, quite by chance. I was selected to join the royal guard. Then I was promoted to retainer, and that purpose has sustained me in large part since.” We don't know exactly how long he's been Ivy's retainer (although I have theories), but we know he was there before Kagetsu. (As an aside, Zelkov was able to defeat Kagetsu, so we know that Zelkov's a better fighter than Diamant who could only fight Kagetsu to a draw. /jk… mostly). Anyway, it’s clear that he fears his life lacks a purpose, and he uses his hobbies to fill that void. Now let’s talk a minute about…

His purpose

It’s being Ivy’s retainer, currently. He says as much in that quote above, but it’s reiterated multiple times. Edelgard tells him, “I’m glad you work hard for Princess Ivy’s sake, but be sure to take care of yourself as well.” He replies. “My duty *preoccupies* me. That is all the care I require.” In his conversation with Marth, he says, “The loss of my family left me with an emptiness that not even *revenge* was able to fill… Fighting for Princess Ivy gives me *relief.*” To Ivy herself, he says, “Princess Ivy, I hope you know I *enjoy* my work. In fact, when I have a task before me, it is my way to *immerse* myself in it entirely. In those times, and *only* those times, my mind is truly at peace. So long as I am your retainer, so long as there is *work* to do… I have a purpose. That is how deeply I appreciate working for you.” (I think people tend to take their support chain at face value that they dislike each other, when it’s much more complex than that, but that’s a whole post on its own.)

Although being Ivy’s retainer is currently his purpose, the fear of not having one in the future is still something that occupies his mind, hence all the hobbies. His ending card says that he later founded an orphanage.

In Conclusion

So what we have here is a man who has no sense of self worth who believes his life is meaningless. Despite all the kind and caring things he does for everyone around him, he thinks he’s only fit for violence. He ponders with Sigurd whether his revenge was just, and comments on Yunaka’s lack of regrets in a way that implies to me that he does have regrets. He’s desperately searching for a purpose, but in the meantime uses his hobbies to fill all his free time so that he doesn’t have to think about all the terrible things that he’s experienced. And speaking of which, his “superlative” in the Ally Notebook is that he sleeps the least of any ally. This is because, as he tells Tiki, “Old *nightmares* preclude me from proper sleep. I only dare to nap.” 

But for real, most of his supports are pretty funny.

Anyway, let me know if there’s anything you think I missed or disagree about. Also if you want to hear about my extensive headcanons, including: What’s with the keys? and Why does he have crit quotes in French?

[made-my-peace-with-all-the-bad]

Bevbrill are Bottle of Bad Wine coded yap:

I got a bottle of bad wine you know the drill

There's a billion stories I don't know yet how to tell

- This is Brill showing up at Bev’s house after one of them has had a rough day and he’s holding a bottle of wine that he got. If it’s Bev who had a tough time, he’d pull her close and hug her while telling her that he’s there when she’s ready to talk, but until then, he’s not going anywhere, he’s going to stay with her.

I want a night that feels like a dream

I want it right slipping in and out of reality

- Every minute that they’re together, it feels like Brill is dreaming. Because how did he get so lucky? Bev is amazing, she’s funny, pretty, and is so easy to talk to. She makes his head spin and his cheeks turn red even after years of dating. Whenever he spends the night, he glances over at her when she falls asleep and he takes it all in. He sits there and he lets flutters fill his stomach when he realizes that he gets to fall asleep and wake up to this every day in the future.

Some nights you need to forget but you know how that goes

Some nights you need to regret but thank God for those

- There are some days when Bev will take bigger sips of the wine and try to forget everything. She can forget the fact that she doesn’t have very many friends left. She can forget that Bob was killed. She can forget the fact that she misses her old friends so much, but she won’t apologize, so she shoots them dirty looks in the hallway and lets disgust filter in to her tone when she talks about them. But sometimes, when it’s just her and Brill and she’s had a little too much to drink, she lets herself cry. She lets herself miss them just a little bit. Because it’s the only time she can. So she cries into Brill’s shoulder while he rubs her back and whispers sweet nothings into her ear.

What good is a beautiful night without someone to spend it with

What good are the stars in the sky without someone to make sure their there

- On their second anniversary, Brill had snuck Bev out of her house and taken her to the park. It was dark and late but he’d spent way too long planning this to not go through with it. He sat down with her on the blanket he’d grabbed from the back of his car and he watched her laugh and smile and he felt so happy. It was when she threw her head back laughing and he’d seen the stars reflected in her eyes that it hit him. This was it for him. She was it. They were forever. So he’d squeezed her hand and told her he loved her and then he’d added on quietly that he planned to love her forever. She felt her cheeks warm as she smiled at him and promised him that she would love him forever.

The way you feel might be normal tonight but in time you will find that it's rare

So take it in now

Cause dreams don't last forever

- Bev was anxious a little more than she liked to admit. She’d learned to hide it or focus her energy onto something else. Unfortunately for her, Brill always saw right through her and knew when something was bothering her. Tonight was one of those nights. Brill was spending the night so she was leaning against him as they both sat in her bed. He had one arm wrapped around her waist and the other one was holding her hands steady. She didn’t even notice her hands were shaking until he’d grabbed them and pulled her closer. She was thinking about the future. About how one day maybe she wouldn’t be this happy. Maybe one day, her dream of a perfect future with Brill would disappear. But he just kissed her head and asked her what was wrong, and like always, she told him everything. And he just reassured her that he was there and he planned to stay for good.

You could wake up in some sunny day

Wondering what happened to all the love you threw away

- Bev doesn’t like to think about the loses she’s had. She can’t think about it for too long or she’ll cry. And she’s Beverly Jitney-Bush, she doesn’t cry. But sometimes, in the early mornings, she’ll wake up with Brill’s arms around her waist and his head tucked in her neck and she’ll think about love. First the thoughts are always about Brill and how lucky she was to find this kind of love with him. But sometimes her thoughts will drift into the platonic love she felt for her friends. She thinks about how she used to sit with Marcia and they’d laugh about boys while doing each other’s makeup. Or how she used to give Cherry advice about Bob and giggle with her when Cherry talked about the sweeter side of him. And sometimes, just sometimes, her mind will shift back to the girl she played with who was messier than the soc girls, she laughed like she didn’t need to contain herself. Bev misses all of her old friends sometimes, but she won’t wonder what it would be like if she’d kept those friends or else she’ll think about the could’ve been’s of her life.

Dance and love and learn to laugh

Though most days are nothing but bad

- Back before they started dating, Bev and Brill had been close friends. He was always there for her. Like in middle school, when her dad and gotten angry with her for not behaving in a proper way at the most recent dinner party they’d brought her to. When she’d gotten home, tears slipped down her cheeks, and of course, her mother had scolded her for that too. So she picked up the phone and dialed the first number she could think of. Brill showed up and her house and in all his thirteen year old glory, he’d grabbed her hand and pulled her into the backyard. He started swinging her around and he felt a smile build on his face when she let out bursts of full on laughter. Not the polite giggles that had been drilled into her head, not the soft chuckles that she did sometimes, but full on laughter. The kind that turned heads and lit up rooms. And when she realized what she was doing, she put a hand over her mouth, slowed down, and started apologizing to Brill. But he just shook his head and brought her hand down, flashing her a grin and telling her that he loved her laugh. It was the first time someone said something like that to Bev. It was the first time someone liked part of her that was truly and completely her.

The worse it gets the more you need someone worth fighting for yeah

- Her life was falling apart. Ok, maybe it wasn’t. But it felt like it. Because in a matter of two days, Bob had been killed, her parents were fighting and it was worse than before, and she was suddenly the only girl in their friend group. So yeah, it kind of felt like her life was falling apart. But she still had one thing to rely on and push through for. Brill. Because he was always there for her, ready to hold her hand, pull her close, kiss her, and promise her it would get better. She believed him. She did that and she pushed through because he gave her something to look forward to. She just needed to finish high school, then she and Brill could go to college, get away, get married, have a family, they could be them. She thought about that future anytime she felt especially down because of everything, and it gave her the reassurance she needed.

When's the last time you said yes and

Jump on the couch you hear the music just give me your hand

- Brill had this ability to make Bev feel so safe that she let herself be childish and free with him. There was one night where she’d spent the night at his house and he’d pulled her downstairs to lay on the couch and watch whatever movie was on. But as the movie was coming to the end, he sat up and asked her if she’d ever jumped on her bed as a kid. She looked at him, confused, as she told him that she was never allowed to. He simply told her that he would be changing that as he held his hand out for her to take and suddenly they were jumping on his expensive couch. She loved it. She loved him. The way he made things that would’ve scared little Bev seem so simple because she trusted him. She loved how much he taught her. He was the one who was showing her that it was ok to simple go with the flow and not have a strict plan for everything.

I can read your mind you know I can

You're just scared that I might actually understand you

So take it in now

- When Brill first told Bev he loved her, she was so torn. The voices in her head were fighting, one of them yelled at her to tell him she loved him too, because it was true, she did, she loved him more than she’d ever thought a person could love. But the other voice yelled at her to run because he was getting too close and if he knew every part of her, he wouldn’t love her. Her feet stayed planted as she listened to the noise inside her head, not noticing the silence that had fallen between them. Then Brill was backtracking. He was stepped backwards and awkwardly telling her that he knew he shouldn’t have said anything because this was new and he didn’t mean to spook her. But as he tried to go to leave, her body suddenly snapped into action and her hand shot out and grabbed his arm, stopping him. But the moment she opened her mouth, it all came tumbling out. She said everything that he could already tell by looking in her eyes. She told him she was scared that he wouldn’t love her if he knew all of her, but she also said that she loved him too. Suddenly she was being effectively shut up by his lips on hers. She smiled gently into the kiss and wrapped her arms around his neck, because yeah, she was scared, but he made that feel ok. He made her feel safe, like she could tell him anything and he’d love her anyway.

Dance and love and learn to laugh

Though most weeks are nothing but bad

The worse it gets the more you need someone worth fighting for yeah

- Bev showed up on his doorstep one afternoon and he knew the minute he saw her that something was wrong. He could tell she was using every ounce of strength to not cry. God, he thought she was getting better at that. He opened his arms and she walked into them and immediately melted into his embrace. He knew that telling her it was okay to cry was pointless, so he moved on to what they’d established would help if this happened. He walked her into his living room, turned up the radio, and started swaying with her. Eventually, as the song changed to a more upbeat one, he started moving faster. He could sense her mood picking up the more they did this. Eventually, she was giggling as he picked her up and spun her around then put her back down and kissed her quickly. Eventually, she was pressing her face against his chest as her body shook with laughter and he kissed the top of her head and told her he loved her.

Sometimes you shut someone out and you know how that goes

But you gotta let someone in and thank God for those

- When she heard a knock on her bedroom door after Marcia and Cherry left their friend group, she knew immediately what she’d find when she opened it. She would be met with her boyfriend, dressed in his usual attire, and holding a bag that would contain a bottle of the same shitty wine they’d been drinking together for almost two years. She knew he would be there because somehow, he would know that she missed them. Bev thought what they did was stupid, their friend, Cherry’s boyfriend, was dead and they couldn’t even feel anger towards the greasers for doing that? It wasn’t something she could understand, but she knew she missed them. It hurt to walk into school and not walk up to Cherry as they waited for Marcia to come in so they could all walk to class together. She missed her friends but she also knew that she couldn’t be around them if they weren’t hurt by Bob’s death. And Brill knew that. He knew so he showed up with exactly the thing he knew would help. So she opened the door and let him in. She sat as they passed the bottle and she told him exactly how she felt.

[pseudophan]

wait i'm new here and i'm curious, if you're okay talking about it what happened before in the uk / why did you move back?

longass story but i've complained about this whole ordeal so much on here i think if i do the whole thing again people will get mad at me like omg we get it. anyway here it is again:

i moved to england (milton keynes specifically which all brits find very funny) with my mum in 2016 to go to high school because norway requires you to do six thousand subjects even if you "specialise" in something and i just did not have that in me. every subject combined with an instant fail if you miss more than like three lessons? absolutely the fuck not. in mk i did a level 3 creative media btec which is known as a bit of a joke because it won't make you kill yourself as much as a-levels, but lowkey i enjoyed it SO much. i've heard media btecs are very hit or miss depending on your tutors but mine were really good! half my class was only there because they flunked out of their a-levels and wanted something easy, but by like week two i'd say most of them were really into it

after college i started a film and tv production course at uni in london, none of the fancy unis because rip my grades lmao but it was a good time. year one went alright, but then when i applied for a loan for the second year months went by and i didn't hear anything until literally DECEMBER, halfway through the year, when they got back to me and were like oh sorry you don't qualify for the loan. oh and we're also taking back the money you got for the first year, so now you're in immediate debt to us for that and to the uni directly for the months you just did where we just couldn't be bothered to tell you you didn't qualify for any funding. hope this helps!

basically because i'd already lived in the uk for a couple of years before university i could apply as an english student rather than an international one, which is much cheaper so that was great. i also, IN THEORY, qualified for a loan through the student loans company, which is, IN THEORY, much easier and less annoying than the norwegian one because you don't start paying it back right away, you can wait until you're actually making x amount of money. all good. the problem was that the only reason we could afford to just fuck off and move to england in the first place was that my mum got to keep her norwegian job and work from home, meaning we weren't sure if i DID actually qualify for the loan because the way she was paying taxes was like kind of confusing. i still don't know exactly how it works, but i guess you pay it all to one country and then they split it? cause you're effectively paying taxes to both norway and the uk but you're not supposed to have to pay More so idk. who knows. not me. but yeah so we called them Multiple times to ask if i was in fact eligible for a loan and every time they were like yeah it's no problem. my bad for not getting it in writing by the way, always do that. then like i said they fully accepted my loan for the first year after looking through all our documents so clearly it WAS in fact fine, or at least enough people working there believed it was.

i have no idea what actually happened with the second year application, or which one got evaluated wrong. might have been the first one, might be the second, i'll probably never know. the real kicker though is that if they just got back to me earlier i could have gotten a norwegian loan and it would probably be fine, but because they were months late i only had like two weeks until the application deadline for the norwegian one and because the whole situation was so complicated and confusing, and i was struggling really hard with any paperwork or essays because of my super cool then-still-undiagnosed adhd, i just didn't have it in me to fight it. i was like whatever, guess i have to just drop out. didn't actually have to drop out, they suspended me for unpaid fees. i kept going until they turned off my key card though and banned me from campus lol, my tutors were just like eh keep showing up until it doesn't work anymore, it's not like they can suspend you out any more 😭

fuck knows what my plan was after dropping out. in my head i was like, well i can probably get a shitty job for a bit and yeah it probably won't go very well but it's not like i've tried, who knows! and then uhhhh covid happened LMFAO, so nevermind that shit! turns out getting a job in covid lockdown london is Difficult. my mum moved back in the middle of covid and a few months later i had to follow and now half a decade later here we are </3

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Me and friend watched Rise of Red and have uh, two reviews: *It was a movie. *Descendants 3 actually looks more appealing as a movie then this...movie.

[spookyteeth]

if i get another skibidi toilet ask i think i might explode

[honeyconez]

guys hear me out would painis cupcake pay taxes? Because he’s not like mega insane like ass pancakes I think he’d pay his taxes in my professional opinion.

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

"my education is my highest priority" everything returns to vocaloid

[yume-fanfare]

im glad that towikasa is more or less slowly permeating into the enstarrie conscience as some sort of background thing but i feel like if you've been under a prolonged exposure to me you'll think it's a bigger ship bigger than it really is, which is to say: not big at all

[medicinemane]

There's honestly... just so many people, just so so so so so many people in this world where I'm like... aren't you people tired of this fucking... you know, I was going to call them clowns but that's really disrespectful to clowns, these people could never get their face on an egg...

Anyway, aren't you tired of this childish jackass? Don't you just want to ignore them and never have to hear about them again? If we just ignored them they legitimately would go away... don't you want that?

And this applies to... just ungodly amounts of people, from jake paul to even elon musk (just... don't touch his shit, he'll run out of money eventually with how bad he is with it), to just... name an annoying famous person and you'll name someone I've literally forgotten right now that I could never have to hear about again if people would just ignore them (unless they committed crimes, investigators are welcome to pay attention while gathering a case)

Yet the answer's always "no, we're paying so much attention to them!" and I'm just like... why? Why would you watch jake paul box? I heard about that and was like "he's still doing that shit?", and yet I guess it made a lot of money yet again and it's just like... ignore him

These people could go away, and yet

[erospourfemme]

i think the reason why i cannot connect to men irl on any level is 1. bc all of them are absolute morons 2. i'm already married to a man inside my head

[todayisafridaynight]

Since you mentioned it, what did you think of Speak No Evil? I was thinking of watching it myself :0

i really liked it ............ my friend scoffed at me when i told her i was watchin it so take my opinion with a grain of salt tho </3

[wackpedion]

back to watching the heathers reboot while (supposedly) doing homework and imma be real guys I giggled at "we need to expel her- is that your preferred pronoun?" "my preferred pronouns for old people is don't/talk/to/me"

[dangoulains-devotion]

grips you by the shoulders

give FFXIII a chance

as much as I adore the game I will accept the gameplay isn't for everyone

but the story is so worth it

[mbat]

i saw this meme format and i had to do it with them im not sorry

[sskk-manifesto]

Ep 7 :)