#like my dad doesn’t even want me smoking on the deck

[rosicheeks]

🤔

[steddielations]

ao3 | hurt/comfort, friends to lovers, pre s4

"Hello? Ed, is that you? What's all that noise? What's goin' on?" 

"Wayne, can you come pick me up ... I’m at a party at the Harringtons’ house ... I don't wanna talk about it, man … Can you please just come get me? Please." 

Eddie hangs up the phone and swallows down the lump in his throat. 

He refuses to cry in Steve Harrington's kitchen.

Making his way through all the teenagers crowding this soulless house, he blinks the fog from his eyes. No tears are gonna take him back to half an hour ago, shooting the shit with his dad in the van, happily ignoring years worth of bloody hatchets and skeletons between them. 

While Eddie was desperate for it to be real this time, dear old dad hadn’t changed at all, taking off with Eddie’s van the second he came inside to scope out the party. Sorry to all the manicured girls of Loch Nora that pay pretty pennies for his shitty joints, but his stash is long gone, along with all the cash he made the last few days. 

It’s all in the wind with Al Munson like always.

The muggy air washes over Eddie when he steps outside, rubbing his eyes against the cool sting of wetness brimming in them. He’s not gonna cry in front of Steve Harrington’s pool either, even if he’s alone out here. 

It’s like a different dimension from the crowd inside, but everyone knows the pool is off limits, though no one seems to know why. Everyone just falls in line to the will of the king. Whatever, Eddie doesn’t give a shit he just needs a minute to breathe. He needs a damn cigarette, too, but of course, his smokes were in the van.

“Hey Munson, you sold out already or something?”

Eddie’s hands drop from his face, whipping around to where the voice came from. Caught off guard, embarrassment rises in his cheeks under the gaze of the man himself, Harrington. There’s an almost eerie blue glow casting off the water where he’s sitting poolside in a deck chair, strangely alone out here when he’s got a whole party inside.

Eddie clears his throat, trying to shield his vulnerability from a moment ago, “Nah man, all my shit was stolen.”

“That bites. Do you know who took it?” Harrington sounds oddly… concerned. “I bet it was that dickhead, Hargrove. I kicked him out like 10 minutes ago.”

“What’s it to you?” Eddie shoots back, instinctively distrustful, hackles raised like a cornered animal. He’s already taken a knife to the back tonight.

Harrington holds up a hand as if to ease him, like somehow in all his prim Polo-wearing properness, he’s used to handling wild things. “Just figured maybe I could help you get it back.”

“Why do you care?” Maybe Eddie’s being too defensive, it’s not like Harrington has ever given anyone hell like Hargrove or Hagan, but they’re all one in the same right? Or maybe Harrington really was ousted from the throne like the rumors in the hallways say. Eddie’s got more on his mind right now than the intricacies of Hawkins High pecking order. 

“Uh, because it’s my house and I don’t want some thief around? Jesus you’re prickly, dude.” With an eyeroll, Harrington waves him over to the empty chair next to him. “Here, just sit down and relax for a sec. We’ll see if we can figure it out.”

Eddie hesitates, feeling like it has to be some kind of trap, but there’s no one else around. Harrington’s never done more than stand by while his jock buddies do their damage to whoever or call Eddie a freak under his breath a couple times, but who hasn’t? Eddie encourages it, even. What would Harrington get out of pulling anything now when it’s not for show?

Honestly, Eddie’s just trying to rationalize it because he could really use the beer that’s also up for grabs, offered with an outstretched hand.

So Eddie stalks over to the empty chair, warily sitting down as if it might snap him inside like a snare. His nerves are all frazzled. Between his dad’s little stunt and now the king of the jocks (former king?) is handing Eddie an open beer that he’s taken a sip from himself, give him a break. Eddie mellows out a tad after a couple chugs.

“Do you have any clue who took it?” Harrington asks, way too much concern in the line between his brows than he should be able to fake for Eddie.

“No one here.”

Eddie sort of wishes it was that simple. A stranger would only hurt his pockets, instead of this bone-deep betrayal he should’ve seen coming. He doesn’t even care about the money, or his van, it’s deeper than that. It aches somewhere the booze can’t wash away. He squeezes the cool bottle in his grasp, blaming the contents for what he woefully admits next.

“It was my pops, man. He ran off with my van and everything in it.”

For some reason, it’s embarrassing to say. Either secondhand for his old man pulling something so low-down, or just his own pride for falling for it. He stares at the unnaturally still water in front of him, instead of meeting the gaze beside him.

He can feel Harrington taking in it, questioning it. Maybe he’s wondering how a father could screw over his own son like that, or maybe he’s thinking everyone knows that’s exactly what Al Munson would do, and Eddie— especially Eddie, should’ve known that.

Even Jeff warned him this time too, having been there since the days that Al would bring Eddie a new bike when he won big at the casino, then steal it back the next week to sell when he lost. Seems like Eddie was the only idiot willing to give his dad another chance, even blowing off band practice the last couple days to spend time with him.

“Your van, huh?” Is what Harrington finally says, soft for some reason. “I could give you a ride home. Forest Hills, right?”

That’s… not what Eddie was expecting at all. Just picturing that hotrod that’s all the rage in the school parking lot kicking up gravel in the trailer park rubs him wrong. It’s all off-beat, Eddie feels so far off his center that he’s normally so sure of. All he can do is push back to try and find it again.

“What, you’re gonna ditch your party to slum it on the wrong side of Hawkins with me? Don’t worry about it, I called my uncle.”

Looking over, he sees how Harrington almost looks disappointed by that.

“Yeah okay, but I don’t really care about this party,” he says, not even trying to pass it off in a ‘cool’ way, he just seems put off by it, “Graduation’s coming up, y’know, it was Tommy’s idea. I should’ve said no, I don’t give a shit about it. Or Tommy.”

Again, not what Eddie was expecting. He feels a thud in his stomach at the mention of graduation, yet another failure under his belt. “Well I’m not graduating, so does it count as that kinda party if you’re out here with the super senior freak?” 

“Guess we’re just having a shitty dads party then,” Harrington tries for what Eddie assumes is a reassuring smile, because for whatever reason in this twisted reality, Steve Harrington is trying to comfort him. 

Him, Eddie Munson.

But it ends up striking an already sensitive nerve.

“What do you even know about it?” Eddie scoffs.

Harrington’s smile drops, snapping back, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

A bitter laugh bubbles up in Eddie’s throat. He hates how it sounds as awful as he feels. Gesturing with the beer in his hand, he states the obvious, “Look around, dude.”

Maybe Harrington’s not as popular at school, but he’s still well off at home. A rich, two parent household that he’s never had to worry about scrounging to keep the lights on. The only business he’ll ever have to do is for his Daddy’s fucking letterhead. Eddie will accept his pity to the extent of a free beer, but he won’t sit there and listen to Harrington pretending to know what it’s like for him.

“Yeah, look around,” Harrington retorts, an even more bitter curl on his lip than Eddie’s. “Got everything except parents, don’t I? Like if they buy me enough shit, I won’t notice they’re hardly here.”

The look in his eyes is a little hurt but fierce, grating enough to cut through Eddie’s defenses. Wayne keeps telling him to stop jumping the gun and going off half-cocked. Yet here Eddie is again, assuming he’s got this guy all figured out.

When in reality, all he knows is that despite being the talk of the town, Harrington’s parents are rarely ever seen around. He lost his girl, doesn’t seem to have any real friends to show, and looks about as lonely at school as he does now— while he’s doing nothing but trying to help Eddie.

“I’m sorry, man,” Eddie relents, “You’re just going against everything I thought I knew about you right now. I’m trying to kick the habit of putting people in boxes with the whole anti-conformity thing. Been told I can be a real judgemental asshole.”

“Yeah I wonder why,” Harrington says lightly, his lips curling back into a smile that sort of makes Eddie want to hide his face. It doesn’t feel wrong somehow, like the rare times that a girl spared him a look, more like it shouldn’t be directed at him. Steve Harrington shouldn’t be smiling at him.

“And call me Steve, alright? If we’re gonna be in the shitty dads club together, we should be on a first name basis.”

That actually gets a laugh out of Eddie. Short and pained as it sounds, it’s real.

“Okay then, Steve,” he has to look away after he says it, feeling his chest cave under the weight of that smile for some reason. Must be the state he’s in. Steve made him forget for a second but he’s sinking again, staring out over the pool, trying and failing to see the bottom.

Read the rest on Ao3

for day one of @eddiemonth prompt “Parents”

[waynes-multiverse]

I was soooooooo excited for this! *breathes in sharply* Okay let's get started 🍿😎👏

“You have my blessing,” she said. “All I ask is that you don’t scar me with any gushy details afterward.”

I love their friendship so much 😂 And kudos to Dory. It takes a lot to agree to this. It could potentially get very awkward 😝

“You know, it’s been about twenty years since I’ve seen him,” she said. “We’ve had entire lives already. I see him now, and there’s some of the Russell I knew when we were kids, but…there’s just a lot I don’t know about him, who he’s become.”

God, I know. This is honestly what I think about the most when I watch Tracker. The whole story line is insane and intriguing and... 😅 I have a thousand questions, and there's so much you could do with it in fics. I love it (clearly) 😂🤍

Dory’s face tightened. “It’s a long story. I’ve told you some of it. But basically, after our dad died, nothing was ever the same again.”

I do think Russell knows a lot more about their past than he lets on. Also, he was way too chipper for someone who was accused of patricide by his own brother for twenty years. The dynamic between the brothers is just... interesting 👀

Barely a date, you reminded yourself, as you unlocked the door to your house. Barely a date, barely a date.

Right... 😆

“You’re a grown fucking man, Charlie! Do you really need me to give you the just say no speech?” you said. 

Oh, she's going full Reagan! 😂 I sense some trouble coming from the brother, though...

“Yeah well, maybe just for one night, I wanted to relax without you harping on my back,” he said, glaring up at you. “Is that too much to fucking ask? For you to give me some goddamn slack?”

Well, I hope he already picked out his casket... 🙈💀

“Hey, there.” He greeted you with a warm hand on your back. He helped you into your seat.

I'd be a puddle before I even made it to the damn seat 🫠

And they are literally so cute together! I'm full on swooning over here 😍

Russell nodded. He wasn’t sure how much Dory told you about their family business, but it dimmed his mood.

Ah, yes, the family business. Love that sublte hint 😆 Would be a good name for a brewery, tho 👍

He was starting to get a clearer picture of who your brother was. It struck at familiar chords inside himself that he wasn’t so comfortable with. He shifted in his seat, fingers flexing over his glass on the counter.

I like that you emphasized the darker parts of his life. Like I said, I don't buy his whole "I'm happy and funny and quirky" act. There's a lot more stirring beneath the charming surface 😅 (Another thing he has in common with Dean lol)

And oh, don't we love a good cry on the first date? Poor thing 😂🤍

“You gotta understand that me, my brother, my sister, we didn’t grow up like a normal family,” he said. “Yeah, I know,” you nodded. “Dory’s told me some of it. It sounded…rustic.” He snorted. “Putting it mildly.”

Indeed 😂 I would've loved to be a fly on the wall when Dory had this conversation with her lol

How he very eloquently avoided talking about Colter accusing him of murdering their father. I wanna be a fly on the wall for that future convo too 🤣

And he slapped you right on the ass.

Loved that she got a punch in before even Russell got there. He might have actually killed that pig lmao

“Aw, it doesn’t look as bad as all that. But can I see?” he asked. You allowed him to take your smaller hand in his. Your knuckles were red and tender to the touch when he gently pressed. You hissed in pain.

I'm having vivid flashbacks to Smoke Eater 🥵🔥

But his hands were gentle for you.

This line just about killed me... 🫠🫠🫠

“Three balls, huh?” you said slyly, and maybe, a little tipsy. “Might wanna get that looked at.”

I appreciate that kind of humor 😂😂

“Now, if I go in for a kiss goodnight, are you gonna deck me?” he asked, with a teasing glint in his eyes.

I absolutely can see him saying that 💯😂

He found no other recourse but to back you up against the side of his car.

Probably one of my favorite scenes is when characters are so hot for each other they lean against a car. There's just something so incredibly passionate about it 🔥🫠

“I’m staying at a motel, if you wanna…” he said, between kisses.

Oh, Russell, this is not what the lady wants to hear. Bless him tho 😂

And I figured she wanted more than a one-night-stand or fling. His job and lifestyle truly is a bit of a problem. But he wanted out anyways, so... 🤞

I loved their first date! 😍🤍 Hopefully, they'll see each other again soon and might give this another shot. I have a feeling it's gonna involve her brother's bullshit somehow 😅

Every Second Counts - Part 1

Pairing: Russell Shaw x F. Reader

Summary: One date with your best friend’s brother leaves you wanting more, even though his questionable job and vagabond lifestyle make you want to guard your heart. When your brother falls into trouble, however, Russell is the first one you trust to help you find him. 

AN: Finally, here we are at Part 1! Remember that A Line and a Half functions as our prologue here.

Word Count: 5.7K

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only for some mature thoughts. Fluff, angst and hurt/comfort, drug use, mentions of drug addiction and alcoholism, skeevy men, and a tinge of spice.~

💜 Series Masterlist

Part 1: "Permission Granted"

“Are you absolutely sure?” you asked, with your hands on your hips. 

You wanted no miscommunication here, no read-between-the-lines mishaps, no subtext or nuance to bite you in the ass later. So here you stood in the middle of your best friend’s office, still at the Wyoming University campus after your last class.

Dory had to laugh at you. She pushed away from her desk and threw her hands up.

“Yes, for the love of God, you can grab a drink with my brother,” she said.

After brushing a lock of blonde hair behind her ear, she went to you and set her hands on your shoulders.

“You have my blessing,” she said. “All I ask is that you don’t scar me with any gushy details afterward.” 

Your face began to heat up in a blush. You crossed your arms.

“All right, no one said there was going to be any of that,” you replied. “It’s just a date. Barely a date, mind you.”

“A-huh,” Dory said with a sneaking smile. “Out of curiosity, what was it about him that hooked you? You’ve been dodging Chris’s valiant attempts for like a month now.”

Chris was a French and Spanish professor. His office was on the same floor as yours, so you two occasionally crossed paths whenever you ventured into the teacher’s lounge.

He usually caught you in the morning while you were grabbing your free coffee fix at the Keurig. He’d chat you up about his classes and his dog and his new boat, and all the while you’d struggle to get a word in edgewise. Despite that, he was good-looking and pleasant, for the most part. It was just…

“I don’t know. He’s not my type, I guess,” you shrugged. You kind of liked conversations where both people got to speak.

“And Russell is?” Dory said, in a teasing tone. You chewed the inside of your lip, fighting a smile.

“I don’t know,” you admitted. “Kind of want to find out though.”

“Okay, well, let me know what you find,” Dory said, more wryly. You caught a bit of melancholy when her gaze drifted off. Your brows furrowed in concern as you drew closer, setting a hand on her arm.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

She was hesitant, but she eventually answered you with a confession.

“You know, it’s been about twenty years since I’ve seen him,” she said. “We’ve had entire lives already. I see him now, and there’s some of the Russell I knew when we were kids, but…there’s just a lot I don’t know about him, who he’s become.”

You could understand that. You squeezed her arm in sympathy.

“Well, he really seems to want to know you now,” you said. You remembered all the questions he asked you when he helped you carry your files back to your office after lunch today—most of them about Dory, about her career, your friendship, and ultimately, if she was happy.

“What happened to you guys?” you asked. “Why are you all so distant? Colter included.”

Dory’s face tightened. “It’s a long story. I’ve told you some of it. But basically, after our dad died, nothing was ever the same again.”

You dimmed at that. You knew their mother still lived in the cabin they grew up in, but Dory had never quite been able to tell you what happened to their dad. You’d never pushed the subject. You knew better than anyone what kind of pain that was. 

“I just wish we’d been able to stay with each other. Me and my brothers, at least,” Dory said. But she adopted a smile for you, before she returned to her desk.

“Okay. Go on your non-date at your favorite bar with Russell. I’ll be here, grading papers until Judgment Day,” she said, with a small laugh that felt like a coverup for thoughts she no longer wanted to think about.

You let her do it. You grabbed your purse and work bag off the spare chair in front of her desk.

“So you’re sure,” you wanted to confirm. “One last chance for me to tell him I came down with food poisoning.”

Dory collected her stack of midterm papers and gave you a cheeky look that said, class dismissed. Then she clicked her red pen and pointedly looked down at the first batch of papers to read through.

You smiled. Okay, you thought, giving her a little wave goodbye when you turned to leave. You had just a couple of hours to drive home and get ready to meet Russell.

“Goodnight,” you called.

“Goodniiight,” Dory replied.

You heard the smirk in her voice without even having to look back.

After fighting through rush hour traffic, you were exhausted when you got home from work. Your tentative excitement and nerves about tonight gave you some new energy though, even if you thought those nerves were silly to have.

Barely a date, you reminded yourself, as you unlocked the door to your house. Barely a date, barely a date.

The Ring Camera beside the door chimed when you entered the house, signaling your arrival. You had to wrinkle your nose at the dank-ass smell that greeted you.

Frowning in annoyance, you dropped your stuff on the kitchen table for now and shucked off your heels. You made a beeline down the hall, to the bedroom that lied across from yours. You pushed it open without knocking. There you caught your older brother, Charlie, snoozing in his bed with the covers half pooling on the floor.

His room was a mess, as usual. Your gaze locked on the evidence of half a blunt on his nightstand and two smoked roaches beside it. You were glad it wasn’t remnants of white lines of powder, like times before, but there was also a large bottle of whiskey. It was almost empty, and hanging loosely from his hand.

He managed to raise his head a bit when you came in.

“Hey,” he said, blinking bleary eyes. He cleared his throat and tried to sit up.

You shook your head and picked around piles of dirty clothes and a couple of used paper plates on the floor. You swiftly grabbed the bottle from his hand and slammed it on the nightstand.

“You promised me, Charlie,” you snapped. “You promised me for the hundredth time that you’d quit all this shit. Where even were you last night? You weren’t home when I left for work this morning.”

He sighed, frowning at how loud you were, and sat up in bed. He swung his legs over the side and held his swimming head in his hands, resting his elbows on his knees. He ran a hand through his hair. It was nearly black, like Dad’s had been, but he’d inherited Mom’s lighter eyes.

“I got invited to a party,” he said. “I’m sorry, I know. This is the last time.”

You expelled a frustrated breath and shook your head.

“You’re a grown fucking man, Charlie! Do you really need me to give you the just say no speech?” you said. 

“Look, I’m sorry. I don’t know how many times I can say it,” he said. He shut his eyes tight, probably trying to fend off a headache. 

Good, you thought. Let that be a reminder of how bad he’d screwed up again. 

“And while we’re at it, what about your half of the bills? You’re a week late,” you said, testily crossing your arms.

“Yeah, I’m a little behind,” he said. Once again, he cleared his throat past a wad of phlegm. He was still a bit crossfaded too, you could tell. “You know they cut my hours to part-time at the museum. I’ve, uh, I’ve been looking into getting another job—”

“I already paid the phone bill. And the internet, the water bill, the electricity,” you said. “The house may be paid off, but the least you can do is pay your half of living here.”

The longer you stared at him, seeing the guilt hidden behind drunken eyes, you realized he wasn’t just late on his half of the bills.

“How much?” you asked.

He frowned up at you. “What?”

“How much do you owe?” you said. Your voice was as cutting as your gaze. Charlie lowered his.  

“It’s okay, don’t worry—”

“How much,” you pressed.

He looked up at you again, this time with pursed lips. After a beat, he sighed and gave in.

“About two grand,” he admitted.

You raised your eyes heavenward, muttering a curse. Your hands went to your temples as you had to pace the room. You were angry and exasperated in equal measure.

“Who the fuck do you owe two grand?!” you asked.

Charlie shook his head. “It’s better that I don’t tell you that.”

You paused. As you looked down at him, your anger dissolved into sadness, like it always did.

“If Mom and Dad could see you now, they wouldn’t recognize you,” you said.

Charlie fought not to react to that, his brows furrowing. Instead, he just looked down, unable to answer you.

“Charlie, you need help. I can’t keep doing this with you,” you said. Your shaky breath gave way to the burn of tears.  

His red-rimmed eyes became glassy as well.

“I’m sorry,” was all he said.

He was always sorry. And you always had to be the one to nurse him back to health, pick up the pieces, pay the bills. You were exhausted. The bone-deep kind of tired that felt like gravity wasn't so much keeping you down, but pushing you.

“I’m going to ask for two things: do what you need to do to get paid, and clean up your shit. If you can’t accomplish that, then I’m taking you to rehab,” you said.

“You know I’ve tried that,” Charlie said, with a shrug of his shoulders. “Didn’t really work for me.”

“You left the program after two weeks!” you retorted.

“I did it on my own! I’ve been clean for months,” he argued.

“And what happened? You go to one party and all your good sense, all your training, mentally and physically—that all goes out the window?” you said. You had half a mind not to believe him.

“Yeah well, maybe just for one night, I wanted to relax without you harping on my back,” he said, glaring up at you. “Is that too much to fucking ask? For you to give me some goddamn slack?”

Your mouth fell open incredulously.  

“I’m on your back?” you said. “Okay. I’ll get off. Do whatever the hell you want, Charlie. I’m done.”

You left his room in an angry huff. You headed over to your room so you could take a shower and start getting ready to meet Russell at Howley’s. 

By the time you got to your bedroom, you heard the front door slam closed.

The truth was, you were no longer in a mood to have fun when you pulled up to Howley’s, but you needed to escape your house. Also, you weren’t someone who canceled on people last-minute, especially not on Dory’s own brother.

You found Russell waiting for you at the bar. He waved to you with a fifth of whiskey in hand and an easy grin. He’d saved you a seat beside him.

You found yourself smiling. Your mood began to lighten as you went over to him. He looked more or less the same, but this time the jacket and jeans combo was navy blue and dark wash, respectively. His hair was swept back, lightly gelled. You smelled the familiar, rich woodiness of his cologne when you drew near, along with a hint of spicy soap.

“Hey, there.” He greeted you with a warm hand on your back. He helped you into your seat.

“Hey, yourself,” you replied, and thanked him for the assist onto the tall stool. You’d opted for jeans and a blouse, paired with your favorite leather boots. It was less dressy than he’d seen you before, but that was “work mode.” This was a more casual affair, even if you’d spent at least twenty extra minutes on your makeup.

You were glad he picked a spot at the end of the bar though. It put some distance from the group of guys getting rowdy as they cheered at the football game playing on the TV.

“How was the rest of your day, Professor?” he asked. “And what’re you wanting to drink?”

You let out a long sigh and turned toward him, resting your elbow on the counter.

“Awesome. I’m going to need two shots of tequila and an order of something fried, and preferably covered with cheese, please,” you replied.

Russell’s grin deepened. “Okay, I’m thinking ‘awesome’ is code for something. But we can get started on that order of Forget Today’s Unfortunate Events.”

He flagged down the bartender with a raise of his hand, but he shot you a glance.

“Though I’m hoping it’s not all of today that you wanna forget,” he said.

Your lips threatened another smile, as the memory of your hand being swept up into his, and soft lips meeting the back of your hand filtered through your mind.

“Yeah, I don’t think that’s possible,” you said.

After about ten minutes of playfully debating the appetizer menu (you swore by the pretzel and beer cheese, but Russell had his eye on those spicy wings), he finally settled on ordering both.

“When in doubt, don’t go without,” he’d remarked.

You swept a pretty coil of hair over your shoulder and downed your tequila shots with a lime wedge. Meanwhile, Russell tried not to linger his eyes on the way your tongue swept over your finger to catch a drop of lime juice. Your nails were manicured, and the shade of the polish matched your lipstick.

Russell didn’t pretend to know the art and science of a woman’s wardrobe, but everything about you was thought out, it seemed, falling in line with what he’d expect from a (sexy as all hell) college professor. You’d also told him at lunch today that as of last year, you now had two doctorates: History and Ancient Studies.

Even with all that under your belt, you also seemed refreshingly down-to-earth, a lot like Dory in that sense. He could see why you two were friends.

“So, are you from here, or are you a transplant, like my sister?” he asked.

Dory hadn’t come to live in Wyoming until their aunt and uncle took her in, when she was about eight years old. Before last month, Russell hadn’t seen her since. It hurt his heart to think about, but he tried to focus on you.

You now seemed to be staring a bit listlessly at the glass of whiskey in his hands. He laid a hand on your arm and called your name.

“Hmm?” Your brows rose as you blinked to attention. “Oh! I’m sorry. Yes, I’ve lived here pretty much forever.”

“You okay?” Russell asked. “Tequila hit ya a little hard?”

You shook your head. “No, I’m sorry…”

You raised your hands up to your temples. You debated whether you wanted to open up about this, but…considering who Russell was, you thought he might just understand.

“Dory told me you’ve been trying to reconnect with your brother, right? Colter?” you said.

Russell nodded. He wasn’t sure how much Dory told you about their family business, but it dimmed his mood.

“Well, you could say I’ve got a brother issue of my own,” you said, laughing humorlessly. “You don’t have to talk about yours, but maybe you’ll understand… My brother is a veteran too. He was a Captain, air force pilot. He fought in Afghanistan, mainly.”

Russell processed that with a nod. “Yeah, I was there too. Special Ops.”

“Wow, okay. Then you know what it was like for him, coming back home,” you said. Your gaze fell to your empty shot glasses. “It was hard, after…”

“After?” he prompted.

You sighed. “Near the end, he lost half his unit in a raid, off of some flawed intel.”

Russell’s brows knitted together. Hmm. Grief, survivor’s guilt, feeling like you don’t belong.

He was starting to get a clearer picture of who your brother was. It struck at familiar chords inside himself that he wasn’t so comfortable with. He shifted in his seat, fingers flexing over his glass on the counter.

You didn’t notice, but you did push the shot glasses away from you.

“I helped him the best I could,” you said. “I got him a job at the museum I interned at when I was in undergrad. He’s there as a security guard, but it’s not really enough, you know? It’s like, nothing satisfies him. I just…I don’t think I know how to help him anymore.”

You couldn’t help it. Emotion bubbled in your throat, making it close up on you as tears stung in your eyes. Your lower lip wobbled, and you tried to turn your face away. Embarrassment coiled up in your chest and made your face hot.

You felt a hand cover yours on your thigh, squeezing warmly. You looked up and met Russell’s gaze, both sympathetic and understanding.

“I’m so sorry,” you said, trying to calm your shuddering breath. “This isn’t exactly first date material. I can’t believe I unloaded on you like that.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said. “Believe me, I get what your brother’s going through.”

He pushed the plate with the last piece of soft-baked pretzel over to you.

“You finish that if you want, then you go ahead and pick something else off the menu. I won’t even argue with you this time,” he promised with a grin.

It got you to laugh, at least, and he gave you a napkin for your tears.

God, get it together, you told yourself. You’re a damn mess.

“Thanks,” you said. You managed to smile as you blotted at one corner of your eye. You hoped you hadn’t just irreversibly smudged your mascara.

Russell surprised you by brushing his thumb against your other cheek, wiping a stray tear away. Your face began to warm with a blush.

“Again, I’m sorry for dumping on you. We had a fight right when I got home,” you admitted.

“What’s his name?” Russell asked.

“Charlie.”

“Older or younger than you?”

“Four years older,” you replied. “He enlisted a few years after he graduated high school.”

Russell flickered at a smile. Enlisted, huh?

Yet another thing he and Charlie had in common, except Russell hadn’t made it through high school in the classic sense.

“What do you think?” you asked.

“I think your brother sounds lost right now. I’ve known a lotta guys like him, unfortunately,” Russell admitted. “Walking back into civilian life, it ain’t easy. That I know my damn self. Just like I know a thing or two about being an older brother. He’s probably doing his best to keep it off your shoulders.”

You shook your head at that. Trying, maybe.

You weren’t even sure of that anymore. Still, it made you all the more curious about Russell and his family.

“I know I said I wouldn’t ask this, and you don’t have to answer. But did you and Colter have a falling out or something?” you asked.

Russell expelled a deep breath and took a sip from his glass. How was he supposed to navigate this minefield with you?

“You gotta understand that me, my brother, my sister, we didn’t grow up like a normal family,” he said.

“Yeah, I know,” you nodded. “Dory’s told me some of it. It sounded…rustic.”

He snorted. “Putting it mildly.”

He shook his head and drained the rest of his glass. 

“Well, my brother’s got an idea about me that isn’t true,” he said.

Your head tilted in curiosity. “Which is?”

His lips briefly raised in a wan smile. 

“We don’t gotta get into that one tonight. But uh, the truth is, I’ve tried reaching out to him several times now. He just doesn’t wanna hear from me,” said Russell.

You considered him for a moment. You laid a hand on his arm, covered by his jacket. 

“Don’t give up,” you said, with a sigh of your own. “Despite some things I said to him today, I know I can’t. My brother’s the only real family I have.”

Russell grew curious then. “What about your parents?”

You gave a weak smile.

“They passed away when we were young, but…we don’t have to get into that one tonight,” you said, borrowing his words. 

His expression fell. “Jesus. I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Thank you,” you accepted, twisting the napkin around your fingers.

An awkward lull of silence fell between you, until Russell nodded and blew out a breath.

“Well. Heavy, huh?”

You chuckled and rested your head against your hand.

“I know. Again, my fault,” you replied. 

“It’s okay, swee—. Mmm,” he cut himself off, shooting you a knowing glance.

“Were you about to sweetheart me?” you asked playfully, nudging his hand. “You know how I feel about that.”

“No, ma’am. Not at all,” Russell shook his head. His smile gave him away though. You laughed and grabbed his arm.

“Come on,” you said.

He allowed you to lead him out of his seat. He already had a tab open, so he’d settle up with the bar later. “Where we going?”

“You’re gonna lose to me at pool,” you said with a smirk.

Russell laughed and wrapped his arm around your waist instead.

“Oh, okay. I’m gonna give you a run for your money, though,” he promised.

And he was true to his word.

Russell Shaw turned out to be a more than worthy opponent. You studied the board as you changed the angle on your cue stick no less than five times.

“You gonna make a move, or we going to be here all night?” he said.

He was smiling as he leaned against his own cue on the other side of the board. His clever moves had left you in a difficult position to get your three remaining solid-colored balls into the pocket.

“You hush. I’m thinking,” you said, fighting your own smile.

“Careful, you’ve got steam coming out of your ears,” he teased.

You shot him a narrowed look for that. But then you smiled, as the answer came to you. You walked around to his side of the board and nudged him with your hip.

“Excuse me, sir,” you said to him over your shoulder.

Russell made way for you, but his eyes followed the way you bent over to line up your shot. Namely the curve of your ass in those tight jeans. He could see you knew exactly what you were doing, in more ways than one.

You shot your shot. The solid green ball leapt over his white-striped blue one and managed to sink into the pocket. You straightened up and gave him a triumphant little smirk.

He tried to temper his smile (and ignore the way his cock twitched).

“All right, go on, do your little victory lap," he said. "But remember, I let you go first.”

“Like that matters,” you quipped back.

You went back to the other side of the board to line up your next shot. Russell noticed a pair of drunk men ambling your way from the bar, but before he could make a subtle move to put himself in between, one of the men’s gazes slid down your form and gave into the base urge to let out a low whistle.

And he slapped you right on the ass.

You gasped, grabbing hold of the pool table. Then your shock melted into ire.

Russell was already heading toward you with an angry frown of his own, but even he had to stop short, when he watched you throw a punch that cracked the drunken man across the bridge of his nose.

Good form, Russell thought, when the guy reared back with a howl. His nose dripped blood when his hands came away from his face.

His buddy started to raise his hackles, but that was when Russell stepped to your side. He angled himself toward you and loosely gripped his pool cue by his hip, like it was an extension of his arm. He was fully prepared to use it like one.

“Fucking bitch!” said the one who was still dabbing his nose in vain. He glared at you, his eyes watering involuntarily, while his friend tried to keep him upright. You rolled your eyes.

"You're the one who's crying, bitch," you returned. Russell held in a snort. He cleared his throat and looked on at the pair of idiots.

“I’d have a little sit down if I were you,” Russell told them, with a smirk. “Let that be a lesson to ya. And if it don’t stick? Well. Whatever you start, I can damn well finish.”

His steely gaze reinforced the promise of his words. The other men were still angry, but even drunks had some sense of self-preservation. They ambled toward the back of the bar to find another pool table.

Russell focused his attention back on you, finding you looking down at your hand, rotating your wrist and flexing your fingers.

“Well, look at you, slugger,” he said. You met his smile with one of amusement.

“That’s just what I needed tonight. A broken hand,” you quipped.

“Aw, it doesn’t look as bad as all that. But can I see?” he asked. You allowed him to take your smaller hand in his. Your knuckles were red and tender to the touch when he gently pressed. You hissed in pain.

Damn, she really gave it to him, Russell thought.

“Sorry,” he said, but your hand felt fine, at least. More than fine. His gaze flicked up to yours as his amused grin deepened. “Good hit though.”

If he liked you before, he might’ve fallen half in love with you right there.

You laughed through the pain. “Yeah, my brother did teach me something. Shit.”

Russell led you back to the bar after you grabbed your purse. There he called to the bartender for some ice. The guy nodded; he’d seen the entire exchange and was sympathetic.

You knew this sort of thing was just par for the course at this kind of bar, but they had the best drinks. Charlie had to carry you out of here on your twenty-first birthday, drunk off your ass. Not to mention, he’d punched out two handsy dicks that night.

You recounted the story to Russell over a couple more drinks. Your conversation was lighter then, filled with laughter and a warm, companiable feeling. He was still rather evasive about his job, but you supposed he had to be, since it was government contract work.

Private security, mainly. Or so he'd said. This man made you infinitely curious, and a bit apprehensive, if you were honest.

And yet, at some point while you two shared and laughed and split a hot sandwich with another round of beers, you realized it.

I like this, you thought. And I like him.

However, the night had to come to an end sometime. Your third involuntary yawn told Russell it was time to call it.

"I'm okay," you tried.

"Nah, you've gotta work tomorrow," he said. He signaled to the bartender. "Let me go ahead and close out my tab."

“Oh, I can pay for half,” you said, reaching for your purse now hanging from your hip.

“You kidding me? Put that away,” he said, guiding your hand with your wallet aside.

Smiling, you accepted his generosity with a small thank you. Then, you let him take up your sore hand again, just to carefully press the half-melted bag of ice over it.

“Feelin’ better?” he asked.

Your smile became softer. “Yeah.”

You had no doubt that this man, tall as he was, with his broad shoulders and the controlled way he carried himself, could’ve laid both of those drunken assholes onto their asses. His intimidating gaze had promised as much.

But his hands were gentle for you.

“I was about to win that game, no contest!” you said, laughing as you and Russell headed out of the bar and into the parking lot.

“Hey, hey, I still had time to win it back,” he argued. “I only had three more balls to go. I could’ve sunk that with my eyes closed.”

“Three balls, huh?” you said slyly, and maybe, a little tipsy. “Might wanna get that looked at.”

Russell snorted. “You think you’re funny, huh?”

“Hey, you laughed!” you said, pointing at him.

He shook his head, despite his amusement. He slowed to a stop in front of his car.

“Where’d you park, huh?” he asked.

“Over there,” you said, pointing several parking spaces down. Your eyes were drawn to his car, however. “Wow. This is your car?”

Russell grinned and patted the top of his black Chevy.

“Aw, yeah. That’s my baby,” he said. “She’s a Chevelle, 1967.”

You didn’t know much about cars, but you could see this was a classic beauty. You passed a hand over its sleek paint job without touching, so you didn't get any fingerprints on it. Though you quirked a smile over your shoulder at him.

“She?” you intoned.

“That’s right. She,” he confirmed.

You smirked and crossed your arms. You paused in front of the passenger door, and when Russell drew in closer, you had to crane your neck up to meet his warm gaze.

“Now, if I go in for a kiss goodnight, are you gonna deck me?” he asked, with a teasing glint in his eyes.

You tilted your head, your own eyes dancing.

“I’m sure you’re brave enough to find out,” you said.

Russell decided he’d take that bet.

He leaned in slowly. He made a show of hesitating, raising a brow, as if waiting for a blow. You were tempted to laugh.

But then he let loose a true smile, and he bowed his head to press his lips against yours. Your eyes fell shut, and your hands moved to flatten against his chest. A firm fucking wall. Jesus.

He circled his arms around your waist, bringing you in closer. Your fingers wound up in his hair, while he tilted his head to kiss you again. You met him with the same fervor with each new kiss, and the feel of your body, soft and pliant under his hands, each little sweet sound that you made, it all drove him to delve in deeper.

You moaned into his mouth at the first warm swipe of his tongue against yours. He tasted like the burn of good whiskey.

You pressed yourself flush against him on instinct. He found no other recourse but to back you up against the side of his car. His hand tangled into your hair, gripping, then easing through the soft strands.

Russell veered away from your soft mouth after a while, just to burn a line of warm, wet kisses along your jaw, and down your neck with the added rasp of his beard.

His lips found the sensitive spot where your neck met your shoulder. He kissed and sucked at your skin, even grazing with his teeth. You gasped softly in his ear, shuddering against him. You ran your hands over his shoulders and down his strong back out of a need to feel him.

His hands were heavy along the curve of your waist then, squeezing your hips. It all felt incredibly right. And by right, you meant body tingling, warmth churning in your lower belly, and wetness growing between your legs, for sure dampening your panties.

You tugged him back by his hair, so you could reach him for another steamy kiss.

“I’m staying at a motel, if you wanna…” he said, between kisses.

You paused against his lips, parting from him softly.

“Or not," he added. "Just thought I’d mention.” 

You giggled, catching your breath, and then smoothing your hands down his chest. The faint throb of your core was telling you one thing, but the warning signals of your more cautious mind were telling you another. You thought for a moment…but then you sighed. 

“How long are you really in town?” you asked.

His wet lips tugged to one corner, ruefully. “A few more days, probably.”

“Right,” you said with a frown. “Russell, I like you. I actually, I really do. If you were sticking around for a while, it’d be one thing. But you’re my best friend’s brother, and I—”

“No, I get it. I can’t predict when I’m gonna be able to swing back into town, and you’ve gotta live your life,” he said, but not without care. He curled an errant strand of hair behind your ear. 

Your heart tugged, almost painfully.

“You’re a good guy, Russell Shaw,” you breathed. “Why can’t you be a good guy who’s staying?”

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he said. Then he cringed, knowing how you felt about sweethearting men. “Ah, sorry—” 

You smiled and covered his mouth with your fingers. 

“It’s okay. You have permission to sweetheart me.” 

After blinking his surprise away, his face eased into a grin.

“Then I’ll wear that badge with honor,” he said. 

Your shoulders shook with laughter when you let your forehead fall against his chest.

Russell remained what he had been throughout the entire night: a gentleman, who accompanied you over to your car.

After another stolen kiss or two in front of your sedan, you parted ways from him with a bit of a heavy heart. You wondered if you made the right decision, or if you should’ve just gone for it for once, instead of second-guessing yourself like usual.

You did know this. The rumble of his Chevelle driving down the opposite road would be imprinted on your memory.

When you returned home, you realized that the house was empty, and in complete darkness.

Charlie still wasn’t home.

Worried, you flicked on the lights and began to text his cell, only to find a note for you on the kitchen counter.

And it worried you even more.

I’m sorry. I’m going to make it right. 

— C.

AN: 😬 Well then! lol We're diving straight into the drama and feels on this one. What did you think of her "barely a date" with Russell? 😂

And where do you think we're going next with Charlie?

Next Time:

Dory was sat next to you on the couch, rubbing your back with sympathy and concern in her own eyes.

“You should call the police,” she advised.

You’d thought of that, but if Charlie was doing something he wasn’t supposed to, then depending on what it was, you didn’t necessarily want him locked up in a cell. He wasn’t a bad person, he was just…lost. You wanted him to get help.

You set down the butterknife beside the jar and turned to her, after drying your eyes the best you could.

“Do you think your brother would be willing to come back to Wyoming?” you said. After a beat of hesitation, you specified:

“Colter, the tracker.”

▶️ Keep Reading: PART 2

Series Masterlist

Ko-Fi Me ☕

Russell Shaw Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Russell S. Tag List:

@kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007

@wincastifer @ades106 @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb @roseblue373

@brianochka @branj19 @hazel-eye-coffee-shop-girl-blog @globetrotter28 @charmed-asylum

@waywardxwords @deanwinchestersgirl87 @this-is-me19 @rachiem4-blog @sweettimelady

@leigh70 @clinicallydepresso @xiphoidbones @skoveu @nyotamalfoy

@kmc1989 @jackles010378 @emily-winchester @waynes-multiverse @jessjad

@my-stories-vault @deans-spinster-witch @syrma-sensei @stellasfictionalworld @ultimatecin73

@jesllianaquilesrolonsworld @pieandmonsters @lhymer1995 @taehyungxjungkookistaekook @lovelystoriesaj

@nicksalchemy1 @spnwoman @onlyangel-444 @sexyvixen7 @illicithallways

@wolkenprinzessin007 @alwaystiredandconfused @carpenterswife @cheynovak @grilledcheeseandtomato

[bloodyblow-blog]

HC Part 3/drabble  (Resident Evil inspired initially) (part 1 –> click --- art –> click)  (part 2 –> click --- art –> click)

(fanart for this part --> click)

-----

Warning: swearing, light petting

<.Saving Zain part is for you to imagine (: it should be related to the one of the future games, so...>

-----

Three men are standing on the deck of a ferry, the only sound in the air is crashing of the restless sea. Zain's keeping himself a bit aside, leaning against the railing with his back and staring at the skies broodly, unusually quite. Salim and Jason, on the other hand, find comfort in the company of one another and are huddling together with their arms pressing agains one another. 'After all we've been  through... I didn't think something could ever shock me' - Salim takes a drag on his cigarette. Trying to quit isn't on his agenda today. 'Yeah. I'd lie if I said I didn't freak out at least a little,' Jason smirks. 'I hope the kid's fine'. The other man glances at his son, who's pondering deeply over something few yards away. 'Zain... he is a stong boy,' Salim nods. 'Just give him some time and space, he will recover'. 'No doubts in that. I mean... like father, like son, right?' Salim smiles - Jason is right; in many ways Zain behaves just like his dad in his younger days.   The city lights of night Holyhead are becoming clearer with each passing minute - soon, three exhausted men will step on the land again and hit the first hotel they'll be able to find to crash out there. At least that is the plan - to finally have some decent sleep (thanks god, vimpers are only the problem of London for now) and head back to the capital in the morinig, dropping Zain off in the institute affiliated to his university along the way. 'Go on suckin' on those cancer sticks, and one day you won't be able to run half a mile' - the American teases. Salim only shrugs, a thin smile across his face - 'I've been smoking for years, still didn't notice myself struggling to keep up with you today'. Jason has nothing to say back. *  *  * It's about 3 in the morning when Jason jumps out of the bed, gasping for air and all sweaty - the nightmares he can never remember are visitting him from time to time. Seeking consolation, he turns to Salim's place and freezes. It's abandoned. All the Iraqi's stuff is gone. However, Zain is still here, tossing and turning in his sleep. Shocked, the marine looks around the romm and finds a note on the bedside table. He grabs it impatiently.

'Jason, you've done everything to help me and Zain, and I can't thank you enoughu. That's why I'm going to the commander and taking the blame. Pls, don't get mad. Consider, even if your capitan gave you a leave, he didn't know that you'd help me, and that may cause troubles. The only way for you not to ruin your career is to let me take the responsibility for disobeying an order alone. P.S. I trust you with my boy, Jason - he needs to get to the university safe and sound, so don't try to chase after me'.

At first Jason's frustrated and confused, and then he's angry. Really angry. He tries to call Salim, but, obviously, no one answers. 'Shit,' he clenches his teeth and trows the phone on the mattress. 'Don't even hope to avoid the reckoning, you, old stubborn man,' the American mutters and strides to Zain. 'Up and at'em' - he pats on the young man's shoulder - 'it's time to move'. *  *  * The first thing Jason does after delivering Zain - he rushes straight to the UK commander base. He doesn't need anyone's protection, quite the contrary, all he wants is to explain everything that's happened to mitigate Salim's punishment. Hot-blooded, the man doesn't give a damn about his own situation at the moment. Jason's too late, though. There is no autority at the base when he arrives, so he decides to head to the hideout in hope of finding Salim there. When the jarhead's about to leave, he bumps into a by-passing officer, who greets him with unpleasnt news. According to the man, Salim was sent to handle one of the bigger nests alone. 'I'm actually surprised you didn't come along,' the man sniffed. 'For one person that's a suicide mission'. 'What?! Did you even try to offer Salim your help?' 'Emm... Nope'. 'Well, fuck you then!' - Jason flips the bird and, furious, rashes to the rescue, praying it's not too late. *  *  * Have fought the way inside the den through unfinished vampires, Jason barely has a chance to return his friend the favor. With a growl he jumps on the huge mutant, stabbing its back with the rifle's bayonet to distract it, so cornered Salim wouldn't get hit with a piece of heavy rebar. Coming back to his senses, the Iraqi grabbs his spear and rushes forward to help Jason - with a powerfull thrust and some struggles he impales the thing, destroing its heart. Like hungry rats, smaller vampires assault the soldiers, expecting to win with their numbers, but Jason is simply getting his rage out on them. Salim slays as much, so soon there is no one alive left in the room except from him and his friend, both covered in vampires gore, battle scratches and bruises. Panting, Jason looks around at the bloody mess they've caused, and then stares at Salim, who's smiling at him with relief. The anger is coming back to the American with the full force. 'You!' - he pounces on the other man and grabs on his clothes, teeth clenched. 'What the fuck's wrong with you?! Why did you do it?!' Salim doesn't look surprised. If anything, he's indulgent and calm. 'I've already explained you why, haven't I?' he asks. 'You helped me to save my son. I couldn't let you get in toruble because of it, when you've almost rose to the rank of capitan'. 'So what?! You decided to fucking die in this shithole alone 'cause of some stuipid ranks?' Jason breates out bitterly, still gripping tightly as if Salim will disappear again if he lets go. 'Why are you such a stubborn fuck, huh? Why didn't you think to ask me what I wanted?.. Don't you even dare to make me worried like that ever again, got it?!' 'Oh. So... you do care about me, after all?' Salim raises his eybrows teasingly. 'Hey!' the American yells, frowning with deep wrinkles going down his forhead. 'What in the hell is this question?! Of course I care about you, you ungrateful ass!' Jason is so mad he has an urgent desire to punch the man in the face. He's seriously considering doing so, when Salim reaches out his hands and cups the marine's face to quickly lay a sweet little kiss on his friend's mouth; than he moves away, wearing a reasuring smile. 'I care about you too, Jason' he says in a half whisper. 'That's exactly why I've done what I've done'. 'Shit...' - the American can't get it together for few long seconds. But when he does, he grabs Salim by the waist almost violently and pulls him close to attack the man's lips like there's no tomorrow. Still pumped up with adrinaline, Jason bites, lick and sucks, and squeezes Salim's butt firmly, so the Iraqi's a bit disoriented by this kind of heat. 'W-wait, Jason' - he manages to push himself away. 'Are you seriously doing it... here?' 'Trust me' - the jarhead smirks, his eyes hungry - 'at this point, I don't give a fuck where'.   'Hm-hm! I think Salim may be right,' the familiar voice notices from behind, and Jason remembers that he didn't come alone.   'Ah! Hi, Nick,' the Iraqi greets like nothing happened and slips from the other man's embrace. Nick's standing there with the biggest grin on his face, that's saying nothing else but 'I knew it all along'. 'Sorry to have interrupted you, guys, but we need to get out of here before the dawn, or we'll be torn to shreds,' he finally suggests and raises his hand with a remote control in it. 'I set the explosives as planned'.

[edgarsfrog]

i rlly enjoy making these hcs, as they always bring out the softie in me and i can use my imagination… lmk if you guys like these!! <3

if michael and sam had a sister, and she was sam’s twin:

i would just like to start off by saying that sam seems like 15 years old

so that’s how old they are in these hcs!

so the emerson girl would be quite a sweetheart

she would get her kindness from her mother

and most likely her and sam’s looks from her dad

(even tho we don’t know what their dad looks like… have you seen the emerson brothers?)

sam and her are fraternal twins btw

so they don’t look a lot alike

i feel like she would have curly, more dark hair like michael

she has always stuck to small groups of friends just bc she naturally has trust issues

and when she finds out that her family is moving to santa carla,

she literally sobs and begs lucy to let her stay in phoenix

but to no avail, she’s forced to come along

but her friends throw a going away party for her and it’s really fun <3

i would say even tho she’s a sweetheart

she’s definitely a trouble maker

like, she’s the first one to ever smoke weed or drink besides michael

she’s always hung around stoners so it was bound to happen

lucy was never a huge fan of who her daughter hung around

but she didn’t want to seem controlling so she just let the girl learn from her own mistakes

she definitely loves comic books like sam

that’s honestly how they learned to read

but anyways

when they move to santa carla she’s quite intrigued by how different people are there

and literally on the first day she’s adjusting pretty well

she spends the whole day setting up her room

and ofc it’s DECKED out

she legit has a whole polaroid wall of her and her friends from phoenix

and ofc her family as well

she ends up stealing the molly ringwald poster from sam’s room

bc…

why tf not??? LMAOO

her and sam’s rooms are the one connected to the bathroom

and she knows she’s gonna hate that

but anways

when her and her brothers go to the boardwalk for the first time that night,

she’s instantly falls in love with the environment

she gets pretty anxious easily tho and is probably clutching onto sam’s arm for dear life

which sam doesn’t care bc he’s just a sweetie <3

and he knows how his sister is when it comes to large crowds of people

so when michael sees star for the first time

she’s the first one to notice

and she slaps his arm bc he’s literally just staring really creepily

so when michael goes to follow her,

she’s the voice of reason

“you know, mike… you don’t even know this girl! i don’t think it would be a fresh start if you got a restraining order on the first day of us living here!”

and when michael shoos the twins away,

OFC they both end up in the comic book store

and when edgar frog sees her and sam for the first time

this man just kind of like…

blanks out for a moment

cause she’s just so pretty

and sam cracked a joke about the frog brother’s parents

and edgar saw her smile and he felt his heart just sort of drop

BC OH MY GOD SHE’S SO BEAUTIFUL AND GORGEOUS AND COOL LOOKING AND PLUS SHES LOOKING AT THE COMICS SO LIKE SHE MUST LIKE COMICS RIGHT?????

but ofc it’s the frog brothers

so edgar keeps the mean exterior as him and alan follow the two around the store

she surprisingly is the first one to notice how hard the boys are staring

and she even grabs onto sam’s arm bc their staring is just making her so damn anxious

JEEZ FROGS CHILL OUT

but when they actually start talking…

she has to hold everything back from cackling

cause she can tell that they’re just trying so hard to act tough

“something funny, sweetheart?” edgar will ask her, literally STARING into her soul

she’ll get nervous and just look down at her shoes

bc like…

a boy just called her sweetheart….

and he’s…..

cute????

no yeah he’s definitely cute

and that’s the moment she instantly started crushing on edgar frog

so ofc when they go home that night she can’t stop thinking ab him

she literally calls her best friend from phoenix and tells her all about it

and she’s just like:

“HE CALLED ME SWEETHEART!! NO GUY HAS EVER CALLED ME THAT! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!!!”

the next day when sam invites her to the comic book store

she’s just like: “YEAH! TOTALLY! HOLD ON! LET ME PUT SOME MAKEUP ON AND STUFF!”

and from that moment sam figured out that she had a crush on at least one of the frogs

bc like….

she’s never gone out of her way to put makeup on to go out to do something simple you know??

he’s kinda opposed to it bc edgar and alan just seem like grade A assholes

but he doesn’t tell her that yet bc…

he’s never even going to speak to them again… right??

yeah… you thought wrong sammy

but just wait (:

so they go to the comic book store

and ofc the frog brothers start stalking the emerson twins again

and sam is just like: 🙄

while she on the other hand: 🥰😌

she literally feels like she could puke bc at one point edgar literally gets so close to her

and secretly he’s doing it bc he knows he’s having some kind of affect on her

little bastard ):<

while edgar and alan are giving sam their little speech about fighting for truth, justice—

yeah yeah yall know what i’m talking about

she knocks over a rack of comics bc she’s just so nervous being around edgar again

sam just looks at her

and he says: “nice going, jitter bug!”

he’s called her that since they were little for obvious reasons

and she’s really embarrassed

she literally just dashes out the comic book store

and now she’s just kind of like: ):

bc she embarrassed the crap out of herself

when sam leaves finally,

edgar picks the rack and comic books up

and he just smiles to himself bc her face was just too cute when she did it

oh shit

yeah edgar is in deep too

but sam reassures her that it doesn’t really matter what those two bozos think

and he gets her ice cream

cause our precious sammy always makes everything better for his sister <3

(ilysm sam emerson)

she notices on the back of the comic sam got, that their’s a number on the back

and she can only assume that it’s edgar and alan’s

so when they get home she keeps debating on whether or not she should call to apologize for being so clumsy

plus

*cough* *cough*

she really wants to heard edgar’s voice again

but that doesn’t matter ofc :D

so finally she just says “fuck it” and calls the number

ALAN ofc is the one to pick up

and she’s just kinda like:

“umm… is edgar there?”

and her face is just like: 😵‍💫😵‍💫 the whole time

alan gets edgar’s attention and covers the phone

“it’s for you.”

edgar is just really confused

“think it’s that girl”

edgar instantly snatches the phone from his brother

“hello?”

she freezes for a moment

OH MY GOD SHE FORGOT WHAT SHE WAS GONNA SAY

OH SHIT

OH FUCK

“uh—i—um…”

she’s not good with these types of things so like she just keeps stuttering and tripping over her words

“having a bloodsucker problem, sweetheart?” edgar asks

and her face literally goes: 😵‍💫🤨🥴🥰

alan is listening to this whole conversation bc he can’t keep his nose in his own business smh

“n-n-no… just—i want to—uh… apologize for… knocking your guys’s stuff over…”

edgar and alan just both look at each other really confused

she panics bc edgar doesn’t respond

so she just impulsively goes:

“okay, mom! i’ll get it! alright, gotta go! pizza’s here!”

and she slams the phone back onto the hook

“oh my god… oh my god i’m so stupid…”

she just tries to forget about the whole situation and focus on her family

well then the next night comes

and the whole michael thing happens

and when i tell you this girl is scared SHITLESS

i mean

chair propped up under the doorknob

windows locked

she is terrified of her older brother

which michael feels really bad about bc they’ve always been close ):

but what she doesn’t know is that when sam called the frog brothers earlier that night

edgar had asked if michael had hurt her

if she was okay

if she knew what was going on

sam’s just like:

“YES, EDGAR SHES FINE”

when michael is just suddenly flying out the window

the poor emerson girl turns into a scream queen

i mean jamie lee curtis WISHES

she can barely even sleep that night

bc one:

she’s really scared

and two:

she’s really worried about mike ):

cause like that’s her big bro )):

so the next day when lucy and sam go out to run errands

obviously max’s dog literally tries to MURDER lucy

and as soon as they get home sam finds his twin sister still knocked out just bc she was up all night worried sick

and sam literally just starts pulling random clothes out of her closet in a huge panic bc of what he witnessed

“WAKE UP! IT’S TIME TO WAKE UP”

she’s all confused when she wakes up

and he attempts to tell her what happened

but one he’s talking super fast

and two the poor girl literally just woke up

“we’re going to the comic book store! get up and get dressed!”

she instantly is just like: 😳 “i—uh—can’t… i’m on my period!”

“well… what does that matter? i’ve seen you do a backflip on a trampoline once while you were on your period… what difference does going to see edgar and alan make??”

so yeah sam forces her to go with him

and she’s literally in tears bc she’s still so embarrassed over what happened the other day

plus

edgar probably doesn’t even like her so what’s the point? ):

sike

at one point sam is literally dragging her by her shirt

“NO! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME! THIS IS KIDNAPPING IN THE SECOND DEGREE, SAM!”

“SHUT UP! I’M LITERALLY YOUR BROTHER!”

“NO YOU’RE NOT!”

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!”

“HELP! SOME RANDOM KID WITH A BAD HAIRCUT IS KIDNAPPING ME!”

“SHUT UP!”

“NO YOU!”

and when they finally reach the store….

she just gives up when she sees edgar

cause like

he’s wearing a shirt that looks really good on him

on the inside she’s just like:

“his arms”🥰🥰🥰🥰😍😍😍

but she’s really quiet while sam is explaining the whole max thing to edgar and alan

and finally when edgar and alan agree to come over that night, he just looks over at her and is like:

“good job… you didn’t knock over anything this time.”

and she doesn’t know what to do so she lets out this…

laugh?

cackle??

giggle???

yeah it was definitely a loud giggle of some sort

they all look at her like: 🤨🤨

especially sam bc….

NEVER IN ALL THESE YEARS HAS HE HEARD HIS SISTER LAUGH LIKE THAT

“oh! look at the time! looks like i gotta go—you know—bathe nanook!”

“but i just gave nanook a bath two days ago…”

“what’s wrong with having a clean dog, sammy?! that’s right! absolutely nothing!”

well later that night when dinner happens

she’s kinda just watching everything go downhill from the sidelines

and she giggles a little bit after sam spills the water on max’s pants

and edgar just looks over at her

and they kinda just stare at each other for a bit

bc deep down edgar believes that it was probably the cutest sound he’s ever heard

wait…

a cute sound??

how TF can a sound be cute???

edgar and her are just a mess over each other but they don’t even know it

so dinner ends right

and sam’s all grumpy bc the plan failed

but edgar and alan stay over for a bit bc ya know

and as they’re about to leave, she comes out of the bathroom in her pj’s after she takes a shower

and edgar sees her

and she sees him

and he SMIRKS at her

AND LOOKS HER UP AND DOWN

he’s hella simping for the emerson girl

and she’s just like: 😊

so the next day comes

and everything is super chaotic obvs

going into that cave was the SCARIEST thing she ever had to do

and when they were crawling through the small little opening she kept whining about the smell

“jesus… the bathroom smells better than this… even when sam gets done using it!”

so when they go to drop down

edgar just looks at her all scary

and he literally just says:

“no. you’re staying up here.”

AND NOTHING ELSE.

she stays tho

so like… it’s whatever

she’s literally screaming her ass off when edgar stakes marko

and she actually is the one to help them all back up

AND INSTEAD OF SAM BEING GRABBED BY DAVID IT’S HER

AND FUCK THAT EDGAR FROG IS HAVING NONE OF THAT

she helps them prepare for the vamps to come to the house that night

and she’s super anxious and paranoid

and at one point she’s just pacing back and forth around the lot he’s scared shitless

and edgar sees her

and he TOUCHES HER ARM

“it’s gonna be fine, you know? nothing is gonna hurt you.”

and for the first time he just smiles at her like: (:

so when the whole thing happens it’s really scary

and edgar doesn’t let the poor girl out of sight

and she’s just clutching onto him the whole time

and he doesn’t mind bc…

well…

ya know (:

when it’s all over…

she’s so happy that her and her family is safe

and she literally hugs michael so many times it’s not even a damn joke

she even hugs edgar and alan (:

so by default her and star are besties obviously

sometimes michael gets jealous bc of how much time his girlfriend and his little sister spend together

when school starts back up she starts making new friends

and sam is just a little jealous

but he’s cool with it bc he’s got the frog brothers

but edgar is just a little shit about it ):<

like she’ll be telling them about something that one of her friends did during class

and edgar will just be like:

“oh yeah… cause your new friends are just soooo funny, huh?”

but deep down it’s bc he just wants to hang out with her all the time

at one point she kinda gets over her crush on edgar

and she meets this new guy

and he asks her out on a date

and she’s so excited bc it’s her first date!!

and star and lucy help her get ready and all that fun stuff

michael DOES NOT approve btw

“she’s 15… she’s too young to be dating” 🙄

SHUT UP micheal

this guy and her really hit it off

and he even kisses her

yeah she just really likes him

and they date for a few months

and she just starts distancing herself from edgar, alan, and sam bc she’s so involved with other things

and edgar is really sad about it deep down ):

sometimes he’ll call the emerson house just to hear her voice for a few seconds

and sometimes while him and alan are hanging out with sam at the house,

her boyfriend will come over

and edgar will just be forced to watch them kiss and stuff ):

sam isn’t the biggest fan of his twin sister’s boyfriend

he told michael and the frog brothers once, “i don’t know… i just get bad vibes…”

well

he was right

cause the mf ends up CHEATING on her at a party

she doesn’t tell anyone for a couple of days

bc one she just needs to process it

and two…

well.

HER BROTHERS.

she tells star first obviously

and star feels really bad and ends up getting her ice cream and just letting her cry

and then she tells lucy

and lucy is one mad momma bear

but she keeps it cool for the sake of her daughter

but… oh shit

SAM OVERHEARS THE CONVERSATION

SAMMY EMERSON IS ON OVERDRIVE MFS

YALL BETTER MOVE OUT OF HIS WAY

he tells michael

and michael is just as angry

and the way edgar finds out is kinda funny

cause like sam came to the comic book store later when he was supposed to

and when edgar asks why sam just says:

“ah… ya know—sister got cheated on, had to go and take care of it…”

edgar is automatically just like: 🤬🤬🤬😡😡🤬

cause like…

WHO WOULD EVER DO THAT TO HER?

AND WHY?

SHE’S SO PERFECT AND PRETTY AND AMAZING AND FUNNY AND SHE HAS SUCH A NICE SMILE AND SHE KNOWS A LOT ABOUT COMICS AND SHE HAS A REALLY CUTE LAUGH AND SHE EATS HER SPAGHETTI REALLY WEIRD AND SHE LOVES DIPPIN DOTS AND SHE HATES GETTING SAND BETWEEN HER TOES AND SHE REALLY LIKES STUFFED ANIMALS AND SHE LOVES AQUAMAN AND SHE STUTTERS WHEN SHE’S NERVOUS AND SHE’S JUST THE CUTEST MF HUMAN BEING ALIVE SO HOW COULD ANYONE EVER DO THAT TO HIS GIRL?

oh….

yeah.

edgar might be in love with her

but ya know

who knows, really?😁

so edgar is just tired of pretending at the point

like he just misses her too much

and he wants to be her boyfriend so bad

and he’s never felt this way for anyone so it just stresses him out

and so he goes to hang out with sam one night

and he catches her crying in the living room all by herself

and he just quietly sits down beside her

and she ends up spilling her guts out about how she feels

and that she doesn’t feel good enough, or pretty enough, or cool enough—

well he just kisses her bc fuck all that noise

she’s so perfect to him

and that’s all that matters

and instantly she’s back into edgar

like… cheating asshole who?

he takes her on their first date to a drive in

and it’s super sweet bc now edgar isn’t really faking anything

and ofc they just end up making out in the back of the car but it’s fine bc they just both really like each other :D

sam is a little reluctant about them being together

but at one point he just kinda realizes that edgar objectively is the best choice for her

michael is just kinda like:

“why edgar frog?”🤨🤨🤨

but anyways

this girl really likes to spend time with her mom

she cooks with lucy

helps her clean

all around her mom is just one of her best friends

sometimes she can be mean to her brothers

but she really doesn’t mean to be

and when they argue she’s always the first one to give and and apologize

but yeah

that’s all

i love the emerson family <3

(canon or non-canon)

[musecharm-writes]

Keep Your Nose Clean (Platonic Reader X Hopper)

ANONYMOUS: hey, i love how you wrote hopper! can we get a dad hopper insert �

Summary: It just happens that you have a harder time keeping your anger in check than most people do. That doesn’t mean you’re bad.

You’re getting pretty tired of people telling you that you are.

(**Note: Reader’s mother says and does some subtle things that could potentially trigger people who have dealt with manipulative or emotionally abusive parents. It isn’t extreme, but I still wanted to include a warning just in case.)

You aren’t a bad person.

All right, you’ll admit it: you have a bit of a short fuse, and sometimes you don’t have the best judgment because of it. But who doesn’t lose their temper every once in a while?

It just happens that you have a harder time keeping your anger in check than most people do, that’s all. That doesn’t mean you’re bad.

So you’re getting pretty tired of people telling you that you are.

“God, I just can’t believe you,” your mom says, pulling at her hair in frustration. “Every other week, you’re getting into a fight, or skipping class, or keying Mrs Dombrovsky’s car!”

“She kicked me out of class for ‘being disruptive’ even though literally everyone talks in her class! She hates me, Mom!”

“So that gives you the right to key her car?” Your mom shakes her head and sighs. She looks defeated. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with you.”

You cross your arms and look away stubbornly, setting your jaw.

Your mom stands there in silence for a moment, trying to ice you out you guess, before she gives up.

“I have to get to the diner. I’ll be home late, so you’ll have to find something to eat.” She waits for you to say something, and when you don’t, she takes a step closer and puts a hand on your shoulder. “Honey, I just want what’s best for you. I don’t understand why you don’t see that.”

You jerk your shoulder out of her grip. “Maybe because you never listen to me,” you fire back.

She looks hurt, just like she always does when you tell her the truth. You regret it immediately.

She sniffs and lifts her chin. “I’m leaving now. I hope you have a better attitude by the time I get home.”

She turns and leaves, grabbing her keys from the dish on the hall table without stopping. When she closes the door, the sound seems to echo through the house.

You stay there, standing in the middle of the living room, listening to the wall clock tick, for several long seconds. Then you sit down on the rug and cry.

--

When you get to the cabin, you knock on the door and wait -- you don’t try to go in because you know the door is locked.

When the door opens, revealing a girl with curly brown hair in baggy jeans and a flannel shirt, you say, “Is he here?”

She nods. “Yes.”

“Can I see him?”

“Yes,” she says again, stepping aside so you can enter the cabin.

The creaking of the old wood floors alone is enough to ease some of the tension in your shoulders. You breathe in the smell of wood and old furniture, and when you breathe out, the anger and the sadness isn’t gone, but it doesn’t seem so crushing anymore.

Hopper is in his recliner with his feet up, a half-finished beer on the side table. He looks over at you and seems surprised, but not unpleasantly so.

“Hey, kid,” he says. Then, because he’s always understood you better than anyone, he adds, “Bad day?”

You nod.

He nods back. He reaches down and throws the lever on his recliner back into its original position, and then stands with a grunt, leaning backwards a little to pop his back. Without saying a word, he heads for the porch, and you follow.

The two of you sit on creaky old deck chairs, looking out over the lake. Hopper takes a carton of cigarettes and a lighter out of his breast pocket, sticking a cigarette in his mouth. You hold out a hand and he raises an eyebrow.

“When’d you start smoking?”

You shrug. “Few months ago.” You keep your hand extended.

He eyes you for a moment before sighing and putting a cigarette in your hand. “Just this once, though. I want you to quit; ‘s a bad habit.”

“Really?” You say, putting your own cigarette in your mouth. He lights his and then hands you his lighter so that you can do the same. “I don’t think you get to lecture me about this , Hop,” you say, eyeing the lit cig between his fingers.

He chuckles and takes a drag. “I’ve been smoking since I was younger than you. I think I have every right to lecture you about it.”

You consider this for a moment, and then you shrug and nod. He does have a point.

“So, what brings you here on this lovely, overcast night,” Hopper drawls, turning to stare out at the horizon. You do the same, taking a long drag from your cigarette.

“My mom,” you say simply.

“Ah,” Hopper says. “Givin’ you grief again?”

You sigh. “Yeah. She’s pissed off because I got caught keying Mrs Dombrovsky’s car.”

Hopper whistles. “That’s somethin’. What’d Dombrovsky do?”

“She kicked me out of class for talking and wrote me up for being disruptive. Which is utter bullshit because everybody talks in that class, but I’m the only one who gets in trouble? Like, whatever, bitch, I know you hate me, I don’t care,” you roll your eyes and lift the cigarette to your lips again.

“She didn’t do anything else?”

You exhale smoke through your nostrils. “...Why do you ask?”

“Because that’s not the kinda thing that really grinds your gears, kid. The shit that really gets to you is more personal than that. You don’t key somebody’s car because they kicked you outta pre-calc.”

You hesitate. “She… She called me a burnout.”

Hopper nods, grimacing. “That sounds like Dombrovsky, all right. That woman had it in for me, too.” He looks over at you. “That all she said?”

You bite your lip and shake your head. “She said I was nothing but a burnout and a delinquent, and she didn’t want to see me in her class for the rest of the day if all I was going to do was distract the other students,” you say. The words are practically burned into your memory. Just thinking about it makes you so mad you want to punch something. “All I did was ask somebody to move so I could see what she was writing on the board.”

Hopper shakes his head. “I’m sorry, kid,” he says, and he sounds it, too. You know there’s nothing he can do about it, though; Hopper’s not your dad, and it’s not like he can arrest Dombrovsky for being a heinous bitch to you. At least he can be there for you, though.

The two of you are silent for a while, just listening to the cicadas and the gentle lapping of the waves on the lakeshore.

Then, Hopper says, “How’re your grades?”

You shrug. “Okay, I guess.”

He raises a brow. “‘Okay?’ What’s ‘okay’ mean?”

You pick at a loose thread on your shirt with your free hand and smoke to buy yourself time. “I have a C in English.”

“Uh huh.”

“...And a D in Spanish…”

“How come? And why do you have a C in English, I thought you liked English?”

You sigh in frustration. “I didn’t wanna do this stupid oral presentation in Spanish so I skipped class that day. And the book we’re reading in English is really boring, I can’t focus on it when we have to read at home.”

Hopper shakes his head, frowning. “Kid, c’mon, we’ve talked about you skipping school. You’re gonna get into trouble if you don’t stop ditching.”

You look down at your lap, feeling guilty, like you’ve let him down. “I know. ...Sorry.”

He sighs and takes a drag from his cigarette. “It’s fine,” he says, smoke trailing from his mouth and nose. “Just try a little harder, okay? I know school sucks and it’s boring, but you have to stick it out until you graduate. Don’t be like me that way, all right?”

You nod.

“You know, when I was your age, I was dealing with a lot of the same… issues you are. Shitty teachers, boring classes, parents who either aren’t there or aren’t listening to you. I was angry. Hell,” he laughs shortly, bitterly, and you know more than ever this man recognises something in you most other people never will. “Sometimes, it felt like I’d never stop being angry. But I want you to know it will get better. And if you ever start to feel like you’re all alone in the world… If that anger and hurt ever starts to feel too big…” He looks you dead in the eye. “I want you to come talk to me. Okay?”

You swallow thickly and nod. “Okay, Hop.” You feel wetness on your cheeks, and you swipe at them with your palm, sniffling.

Hopper notices and stands, wordlessly opening his arms to you. You accept gratefully, and he lets you cry into his chest for as long as you need before you pull away slowly, sniffing and wiping your eyes.

“Thanks, Hop.”

“Anytime, kid.”

[ryuu-to-sobakasu-hime]

Ryuu to Sobakasu no Hime (Belle) Novel | English Translation | Chapter 3

**This is a machine translation. I put it together by extracting text page-by-page from a .pdf version of the Japanese novel, and running it through Google translate. I have only minorly edited some of the more confusing lines to make it more read-able. It is still a very rough translation, but it’s good enough to understand what’s going on. If there is anyone out there who wants to properly translate the novel, I am more than happy to edit it, if you’ll contact me.**

———————————————

Chapter 3: Memory

"Mother."

"What is it, Suzu?"

When I called, my mother turned around and replied.

Eleven years ago. The house was still new. There was no garage yet, and potted flowers were lined up all over the garden. "Do not cut my hair."

I told her that and ran down the slope in front of my house. Mom walked down the stairs opposite her, resting her hand on her waist and waiting. I ran away in the opposite direction, bouncing, saying that I would never let my hair be cut. But I was taken back without a hitch. She was seated on a bench in the garden and dressed in a haircut cape. “I’m going to make you look cute, Suzu.” After cutting my hair, I don't like the tingling of my hair. She shook her legs and sharpened her lips. But when she held the scissors without hesitation, she cut my hair all at once. "Because you’re going to be an elementary school student," I hope the hair on both sides doesn't stick to my shoulders. The bangs were far above the eyebrows. Even when I went to school, my neck was tingling for a while.

I played a lot with my mother. I took a sumo wrestling on the lawn of the riverbed in the evening. I pushed her by force and my mother rolled on the grass. I won, I laughed happily. Mother also laughed. I asked why? Won’t she cry if she loses? Mom shook her head. “I'm glad that the weak Suzu has become stronger.” Dad was laughing while lying on the grass. My mother often made salted seared meat. She lightly sprinkles salt and roasts the bonito stabbed on a gold skewer from her lenticel over an open flame on the stove. I was staring from the top of the chair. Since the fat drips, the microwave oven will not get dirty if you bake it while sucking it with cooking paper. When it gets burnt, dip it in ice water to cool it, and then drain it. It was a style. So as a kid, I had a hard time holding a thick piece of salted meat with chopsticks, and I had a hard time putting it in my mouth. Mom was waiting for dad's return, holding a mug and watching my struggle.

My dad was a salaryman at that time, and he wore a tie and went out to the city every day. Perhaps because of that, we had some money in our house in the old days. Mother bought a state-of-the-art smartphone at the time. I decided to try out the performance of the on-board camera, and on dad's lap, I pointed my smartphone at my mom. I asked dad to help put mom in the frame and pressed the shutter. She is dressed in white.

The smiling mother, she was beautiful. The photo of her was printed on paper and is still at the house. I was a cheerful child running around, unlike now. I definitely liked playing outside rather than inside the house. If there were trees, I climbed, if there were leaves, I tore them, and if there were insects, I chased them. But it didn't burn in the sun. I must have been such a constitution. Instead, my face is freckled.

I was often injured. My knee was also full of scratches. In the woods, on the riverbed, on the slope in front of my house, I often stumbled and fell. My mother ran up in a hurry and she hugged me tightly, crying in pain. Mysteriously, it hurts somewhere. That's when I was happy. I don't know how many times I fell because I ran around vigorously and wanted mother to hug me. Every time mother rushed in as if it was a big deal for her daughter and worried. Every day was like summer vacation. I clung to mother doing the laundry and cleaning and played. After lunch, she opened the tatami mat, laid a summer futon on the tatami mats, and we took a nap together. The smoke of the mosquito coil was rising slowly. When I woke up, most of the time, I couldn't see my mother sleeping next to me, and she was busy doing housework. In retrospect, she never been told me that she is busy. She was always with me when I asked for it. Since my house was in the mountains, I rarely went out to eat somewhere, and instead my mother cooked any kind of food. One day she saw it in a picture book, and she said she wanted to eat yakitori. She had never eaten it before. My mother made yakitori by sticking chicken on skewers one by one. For the first time in my life, I saw yakitori with the naked eye. I didn't know how to eat it, so I couldn't do well by chewing the meat and removing it from the skewers. Dad and mom were staring at me. Never missing what her daughter experiences for the first time in her life. The place where we, who live in the mountains, go out to play is not an amusement park or a shopping mall, but a campsite further in the mountains from our house.

On a sunny summer day, my mom and I wore a wide-brimmed hat and crossed the subsidence bridge. Dad was carrying a lot of camping equipment. The water crystal pool in the depths of the Yasui Valley was a breathtaking blue color even for us living in the area. The water is so transparent that you can clearly see your shadow on the bottom of the river. I feel a little scared as if I were floating in the air. My mother was an advanced swimmer. She boasted that her mother, who was once a local kid, swam like a kappa every day in the summer. She knew all about the fun of the river. At the same time, she never let her swim in dangerous places on dangerous days. Mom wraps around me, floating. She dived into the water to show her off her skills. Still picked up by her, I became anxious and called out. “Mom, don't go.” But mom, she swam in the blue water, as if she couldn't hear me.

One evening, I was playing with my mother's smartphone and saw a strange app. I put it on. When you launch the app, you'll see white and black horizontal stripes lined up. I pointed to what this was and asked my dad who was next to me. Dad looked it and twisted his neck, calling mother, who was preparing dinner. After dinner, mother's hand fixed the smartphone I was holding vertically. I laid it down and found it to be a piano keyboard. As prompted, I pressed one of the keys. There was a "do" sound. I looked at my mother's face. My mother also saw my face, saying that she had come out. It's mom’s music production app. Only then did I look around my mother's room and notice. Old records, cassette tapes, and CDs are lined up on the shelves to the end. And if you set them on a record player or cassette deck and pass them through an amplifier, music will be played from the left and right speakers. The collection was a brilliant one that accurately captured the main points of the history of classical, jazz and rock. I didn’t know at the time, the value and meaning of such a lineup being packed in a room at the end of the world.

In that room, I pressed the keys of the app one after another and recorded. When played, each sound sounds in the order in which they are arranged. Even if you enter an insane scale, it will play back in a lawful manner. I was so happy that I bounced on my chair. My mother was laughing too. Warm incandescent light was illuminating us. After that, I was crazy about this app. I had my mother lend me a smartphone and I was playing around with it day, night and morning. The operation was intuitive and easy to use. There were words that I couldn’t read because it wasn’t a children's app. And there were many functions I didn't understand. But I was absorbed in that kind of thing. I was completely absorbed in the exciting new experience of writing songs. I composed a number of songs and previewed them in front of my mother. The mother who finished listening gave me advice in short words each time. If you do xxx, it will be better, or the trick is to do xxx. She sometimes took out some of the records in the collection and listened to them for reference. My mother is neither a musician nor a composer.

I think each piece of advice is accurate even if I look back on it now. Over and over again, she listened to my melody, and she said she noticed something, and she sang herself to make sure it was. When I asked, she said it wasn't bad. She said she was smirking at me as she said. I put the sound in a place that I wouldn't normally put it. I'm sure this song was a failure, and all the work I've done so far will be ruined. But as it gradually takes shape, it seems strangely cohesive, she said. I felt as happy as I wanted to. I'm sure it's my parents' favor, but even if my mother added, I was happy. For me, I'm not making it with the intention of letting someone else listen to it. It would have been nice if only my mother could listen to it. My mother sings along with the song I typed in. Take the tempo with her right hand and sing gently. The voice of mother, who was also a member of the chorus made by her friends, echoed and was transparent.

She listened to my weird songs many times. I was happy and sang along with it. Anyway, it’s a song that is as nice as my mother.

I couldn't. Happy memories of me and mother suddenly end here. And that August has come. After this, all I have is a painful, painful memory. The voice of a little girl crying and crying echoed in the riverbank. A girl was left alone on a sandbar. Is she 4 or 5 years old? She looked smaller than I was. It was so sunny just a while ago, but I noticed it wasn't a blue sky, and it was covered with overcast clouds. The beautiful and calm river was cloudy, flooded, driftwood-filled, and surprisingly fast. I can imagine that it is raining heavily upstream. Before this happened, there were people happily making noise on the opposite bank when the flow was still transparent. They are now staring at the girl on this shore. She wore colorful outdoor clothing that made it easy to see that she probably came from the city, not a local. The girls' clothes were also bright colors that I had never seen. Why did people from the city overlook the girls' flashy colored clothes? Why did she forget her existence and she came back to this shore? What to do with friends, their families, and those who enjoyed fishing and canoeing on the riverbanks.

It seemed that she couldn't do anything, and she had no choice but to stand and look like a stick. It's no wonder you're standing. The violent flow of the river separated the girl from the people. Everyone realized that it couldn't be helped. One of the adults was talking to someone on his cell phone. However, everyone can see that where the girl is, is gradually narrowing. Everyone is aware that it is very unlikely that the rescue team will arrive in time. Therefore, I have no choice but to stand up without being able to do anything. Is it just listening to the girl's crying as it is? At that time, someone picked up the red life jacket beside the canoe.

I went forward while staring at the girl. She was a mother. Mommy, and I hurriedly clung to the hem of her mother's clothes. She realized that what her mother was trying to do was too dangerous. She wouldn't have been anxious. She screamed and pulled hard, trying not to let her go. Mom crouched down and squeezed my hand, and she told me something. At that time I can't remember what mother said. Maybe I was screaming and not ready to hear the words. Mom stood up to shake off my chasing and ran, locking the buckle on her life jacket. I fell down on a stone in the riverbank trying to chase her. Still, I got up and shouted at mother's back. Don't go. I think mom didn’t hear my words. While checking the girl's whereabouts, I went around the river, went into the water, and got in the stream to help. It started to rain.

How long has it passed since then? Suddenly the surroundings became noisy. The girl was rescued from the river. Adults are pulling the soaked and tired girl out of the river. I was staring at while getting wet in the rain. People running up. A mixture of joyful voices and crying voices. Are you okay? Open your eyes. I'm glad I was saved ... The girl was wearing the same red life jacket that her mother wore. At that moment, I understood at once what was happening. Mom isn’t here.

"Mother ..... Mother .....!"

I looked left and right, searching for her.

Not anywhere.

"Mother ...!"

In the distance, I heard an ambulance siren. The girl was wrapped in a blanket.

Carried by many adults, she leaves the riverbank. Everyone is crazy about it and realizes that my mom isn't there.

She isn't.

"Mom!" Only I raised my voice and kept calling. Many times. Many times. Many times. I don't remember much after that. When I heard that my mother was found all the way down the river, it seemed like a lie. It wasn't long before I realized that the mug that mother was using was missing. Dad put a picture of mother, which he took someday, in a picture frame and put it in a corner of the kitchen. He had to add flowers every day next to it. Neighbors bothered to talk to me every time I met them on the road, listened to me in a friendly way, and encouraged me with tears. Meanwhile, the Internet was flooded with anonymous posts about the accident.

"It's a suicide act to jump into a river flooded by rain"

"It seems that she was confident in swimming, but it's different from the pool."

《It is irresponsible for my child to help someone else's child and die》

《If there is an accident, playing in the river will be a nuisance and annoying》

《Because helping people is a good person, this is what happens》

The person who wrote it probably didn't know anything about the actual situation, and the day after he wrote it, he probably forgot what he wrote. However, the person who wrote it keeps sticking in my chest forever. Immediately after the accident, an acquaintance told me with resentment that it was terrible when I saw this. In front of these words, I was too young to understand all the meanings. However, as I grew up and became able to understand the meaning of the words accurately, I continued to suffer from the unconscious malice contained in them. Losing mother.

How should I pass on these writings as a bereaved family, even though I still can't accept them, as if the mother who helped me was all bad?

Aside from me, my mother just smiled in the picture frame in the kitchen. From that accident, I think something has changed decisively from what I used to be. One evening, in mother's room, where dust began to build up, I stood on her chair, hoping to return to her happy memories. And I sang the song I sang with mother. But when I started singing, I realized I couldn't sing at all. My voice became stuck in the back of my throat and couldn't get out of my mouth. I was confused. Something in my heart was suppressing me from singing. Why can't I sing? Tears came out.

Hey mom. Why can't I sing?

It was clear that the reason why singing was so fun and necessary was because my mother listened to it.

However, just because you can't sing... You don't have to worry about anything. Even if you can't sing, no one will blame you. Life just goes on. I went to a local junior high school. The jumper skirt uniform was stuffy. Many of the elementary school classmates went to the town as they went on to school, and there were not half of the students remaining in the local area, so even in junior high school, it became a compound class. Therefore, the chorus practice was accompanied by the vice-principal teacher, and it was decided to sing in all grades. There were three people in all grades. Because there were only three people, I quickly realized that I was just lip-synching without singing. I was asked why I didn't sing, but I didn't say anything. I thought they would get angry, but they didn't get angry. It means that only I can visit from the next practice.

I sat alone in a corner of the music class and watched everyone practice. I may have looked like a lethargic girl who was just silent. But inside that, there are things that can't be translated into words.

I think it was swirling. When I left school and returned home, I irresistibly entered mother's room in the twilight. The twilight light was shining through the window. Cardboard boxes containing tableware and seasonal home appliances that are no longer in use are piled up on the table. It was completely turned into a storeroom. It's been many years since then. It has passed. I listened to the large number of records there, one by one from the edge of the shelf. Days, days, days. By listening earnestly, I managed to calm my rough feelings. But one day, there was a moment when I thought I couldn't bear it anymore. Upon returning, I entered my mother's room, sat down in front of the keyboard, quickly opened the report sheet, and began to write fiercely with a pen to spit out the incomprehensible feelings in my chest. I was almost suffocating if I didn't spit it out. I turned over the paper and continued to write forever. -Why did mother leave me in the river? Why did she choose to help the child who she didn't even know her name rather than live with me? Why am I alone? Why, why, why – I added paper, supplemented with post-it notes, and wrote long, long lyrics. The scale that springs up is notated long and long. Those that were neither were spit out as pictures. It was a swirl of many kinds. It was like a whirlpool floating on the surface, like a black hole that swallowed everything, and like a hole in the top of my head. The floor of the room was filled with pieces of paper with a mixture of lyrics, pictures and sheet music. But suddenly..... I returned to myself and stopped writing. Right now, I've noticed the worthlessness, meaninglessness, ugliness, and helplessness of the words, pictures, and scales I wrote.

What are you doing? I broke the paper. Everything I've written so far.

I threw it in the trash can without hesitation. The bundle of paper looked like a vomit that I had just spit out. Then I became a high school student.

I finally found myself worthless. The uniform tie was stuffy. I crossed the subsidence bridge while looking down and went to school. I took an exam and passed the exam at a junior and senior high school in the center of the city, and transferred from high school. There, I met my childhood friend Shinobu-kun again.

"Shizu.."

"Shinobu-kun ..."

Now that I was in high school, Shinobu-kun looked tall and shining, all different. On the other hand, I didn't seem to have grown at all since then, and I was irresistibly embarrassed and couldn't even talk. What have I been doing so far? I started a new life going to the city from the mountains, but I couldn't get into studying. Even though I had a hard time taking the exam, I just looked out the window during class. Knowing that this shouldn't be the case. Club activities didn't go anywhere. There were very few such students. On the way home, you can see the students devoting themselves to club activities. The track and field club is jumping the training hurdle in a line in the courtyard. The volleyball club is running on the ground. A percussionist in the brass band with a metronome in his ear is striking a stick in the hallway. The Naginata club sits upright in the martial arts hall with a good posture, and thank you for your cooperation, saying before the practice. The first-year students of the baseball club, who have not yet been numbered, stand side by side and watch as if they are digging into the practice of their seniors. I didn't belong anywhere, so I left school quickly. It was already winter. There is a river called Kagami River that flows from east to west in the center of the city. Since the flow is often gentle, the TV tower and buildings on the opposite bank are reflected like a mirror. When I returned to the station through the road beside it, the girls of the light music club carrying the "Chahahaha" musical instrument case overtook me with a light step while laughing. A cute cat-shaped stuffed animal attached to the school bag is shaking. Attached to my school bag was a cheesy plastic plate of "Gutto Koremaru". "Gutto Koremaru" is an egg-shaped character who can poke his hand against the wall and endure the pain. I have a crack in my head, probably because I endured it too much. Of course, it's not cute.

In a dark and narrow corridor.

I resisted, "I can't do it! Hey!", But I was pulled into the room, saying "OK." The soundproof door slammed behind me. Shinboku "Ah!" There was a flashy room in a karaoke box, and the pink and purple lights were spinning mysteriously. It smells of incense. Only for girls in the class.

I heard that it was a social gathering, but when I saw the frenzy of the girls standing on the sofa and shaking their heads, I thought that I could not get into this tension very much.

"Peggie Sue is cute"

"This is the one that is popular in" U ", isn't it?" On the monitor screen on the wall, the popular Az of "U", Peggy Sue, was seen singing in a black rubber dress. Purple lipstick that shakes silver hair. An eccentric beauty with red eyes. Peggy Sue? "U"? Az? Is it popular? I don't know anything. It's like an event in a different world from me. Then, Hitomi suddenly offered a microphone, "Yes." Sing, and so on. "Huh?" Puzzled. Neither the coat nor the muffler is taken off. But "yes" the microphone was pointed again. Why for a child like me who is at the end of a class?

"Sing together?"

"Hey, sing."

The shadows of the girls press the microphones. What do you mean?

"Are you not going to sing alone?"

"Isn't it a lie that you can't sing?"

I see, so it’s this situation.

Dozens of microphones are forced against my face one after another. "Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu"

"Sing"

"Hey, sing?"

"Sing"

Those voices sound like a threat.

"You're telling me to sing."

"Sing!"

"Sing!"

Ahh!

Immediately, the microphone popped off and fell to the floor.

The girls dancing on the sofa suddenly saw me. It's calming down as if I was taken aback.

"What happened? Suzu-chan"

The mic and the shadows of the girls disappeared like a phantom.

"No, nothing. I'm sorry. Hey ..."

Without saying anything, I pushed the door of the karaoke box open by force and went out like crawling. Someone might have heard and told everyone that I couldn't sing.

When I got off the bus, powder snow was flying. I almost slipped down the slope from the bus stop. Even in Kochi, it usually snows in the mountains, aside from the city. When I crossed the subsidence bridge, I heard a crackling sound of thin ice. The surface of the concrete bridge is frozen.

Cold. It's not dexterous enough to get used to everyone, and it's not divisible. On the other hand, I’m not strong enough to be alone, not prepared, and have no idea.

I don't do anything selfish. Rumors that you can't sing, that's a lie. I'm just not confident in myself for a while. I want to get along with everyone. Really. I know. Of course I know. So "Ah ... Ah ..."

In the middle of the bridge, I impulsively exhaled my voice.

"Ah ... ah ... ah ah"

As I breathed in, cold air sank into my throat. Still, I sang towards the river. "Ah..”

Did I sing? It didn't match a song. It's just a growl. The bag slipped off my shoulder. Will you forgive me if I sing? Can I get along with everyone if I sing? It doesn't help to sing alone in such a place. It's like a scream of a dead end before being crushed. Still, I sang that song with my mother with a squeezed voice. I was happy back then. It's different now. Powder snow was swirling in the flow of the river. Suddenly, in front of me it became pitch black. Nausea swelled from the back of my stomach, and I held my mouth with both hands.

"Uuuuu!"

I crouched on my knees. However, I couldn't stand the momentum of the backflowing gastric juice. I pushed my body forward and vomited towards the clear stream under the bridge. The vomit that was about to kneel and vomit fell to the surface of the water, creating a number of ripples. I spit out everything in my stomach and fell on the bridge. My hair is messed up and my mouth is smeared with gastric juice and smells. It's already spicy. I want to get rid of everything. Shivering and crying as if groaning. Drops of tears ooze on my cold cheeks and tingle. I wish I were gone.

I could hear the slight sound of powder snow folding and piled up right next to me. A notification came to the smartphone that slipped off my bag. It was a message from Hiro-chan.

<< Look at this, Suzu. It’s so amazing that I’m seriously laughing. >>

There is a link to somewhere.

-------------------

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1Dcx2NedPVBEdbfQaU-WC0pJMRmn20ASn7HSC0KY9R7E/edit?usp=sharing ~ Google Doc of the English-translated novel.

ryuutosobakasuhime.wordpress.com ~ English fan-site for Ryuu to Sobakasu no Hime where translations, scans, and other content is posted.

[silverlightqueen]

Her 🦋

‘I could go up out to outer space with her, all I need is one more day with her.’

Phases - Hwang Hyunjin X Chase Atlantic

Rating: M (heavy angst and suggestive content)

Warnings: discussion of suicidal thoughts and severe depression, childhood trauma (absent father, daddy issues), discussion of sex, discussion and use of drugs, substance abuse/addiction and alcoholism, extremely toxic relationship, emotional manipulation and verbal abuse, fwb, sexting and sending nudes

Word Count: 4.6k+

a/n: and here is the second part of phases, my hhjxchaseatlantic series! please proceed with caution bc this fic is very heavy and touches on some very sensitive and serious topics. I really hope you guys enjoy this, lmk what you think and hmu if you wanna be on the taglist! the biggest thank you to the loml @silverlightprincess for proofreading this and bigging it up so much lmao I love you sis! x

taglist 🦋: @diue​ @shesfuckedinthehead​ @danyxthirstae01​ @linours​ @titleisyettobemade​ @jikooksgirl19​ @silverlightprincess​

A loud ping from Hyunjin’s phone resonates in the hazy room, the other boys exchanging knowing glances, and he ignores the way his hands itch to reach into his pocket and see if it’s her. ‘Aren’t you gonna check that?’ Changbin asks, fingers fumbling as he tries to roll yet another joint. Hyunjin’s surprised the other boy can even see straight, let alone roll a joint, but he manages it. It’s not his best work, but it’ll do.

They’re sat in the private bar on the top floor of Changbin’s dad’s hotel on the outskirts of the city, surrounded by windows that overlook the skyline. None of them have particularly well-paying jobs – they have more than enough to live, but they splash it all on drugs and drink and fast cars and pretty girls who want Fendi bags, but thanks to Changbin’s dad, lavish nights filled with the oldest alcohol and the best weed are a regular. Changbin’s dad helps fund this lifestyle and they can’t be grateful enough towards him for it.

‘It won’t be urgent,’ Hyunjin says offhandedly, but he feels his skin lighting up with energy. It’s like nothing else is allowed to exist in his mind or body when he thinks of her – she pushes away everything else, even the marijuana mist that hangs in a heavy cloud over his mind. He’s already beginning to sober up, his senses alert and tuned into her. She’s not even here, and she’s all he can feel.

‘What if it’s your girl?’ Chan teases, dimples denting his cheeks as he hands Changbin the lighter. ‘She’s not my girl,’ Hyunjin replies mildly, the boys all looking amused. ‘Then why’d you go running whenever she texts you?’ Minho asks, gentle laughter running around the room, and Hyunjin pushes down the shame, rolling his eyes and curling his lips at the corners, trying to seem nonchalant.

‘He doesn’t go running. He leaves her waiting like a dick,’ Jeongin says, Hyunjin flipping him off half-heartedly. ‘As he should. She ain’t shit,’ Jisung says with a grin. ‘You say that, but you’d go running if it was you she was texting,’ Seungmin grins at Jisung, the latter nodding instantly. ‘Of course I would. I’m not a fucking idiot. I just feel sorry for him. They’ve been fucking around for years and she still hasn’t caught feelings like all other girls do. If there aren’t any feelings involved, it gets boring,’ Jisung says, not realising how his words feel like weapons to Hyunjin.

‘Are you fucking crazy? It’s way better without feelings. It gets messy with feelings,’ Minho says as Chan passes him the joint, fresh smoke already beginning to blur the room, and Hyunjin nods. ‘Exactly. The only reason we’ve been fucking around for so long is because there aren’t any feelings. That’s why we work so well,’ Hyunjin lies, his phone pinging again.

‘Well, I admire you. I’d have caught feelings for her by now,’ Felix says candidly, the other boys bursting into laughter. ‘Don’t laugh! You lot would’ve caught feelings for her too!’ he says defensively, raising his voice over the laughter. ‘Yeah, I definitely would have. I think I’d have wifed her by now,’ Changbin grins, and Hyunjin feels the jealously bubbling up inside him. He hates it when they talk about her. She might not be his, but she’s more his than she is theirs. They have no right to talk about her like that.

‘Yeah, but how do you wife a girl that doesn’t wanna be wifed?’ Chan asks, all of the boys letting out noises of agreement. ‘True. She’s actually living the life. Always decked out in designer, dick from Mr Handsome, free drugs from his friends, boujee apartment in the city, sexy group of friends and an easy ass ‘working from home’ job,’ Jisung says, sounding jealous, and all the boys start laughing again. ‘She really is. I’d swap lives with her, no hesitation,’ Seungmin says, more laughing filling the room.

‘Check your phone then, Mr Handsome,’ Felix nudges Hyunjin, and the boy lets out a little sigh, taking his time as he gets his phone out of his pocket. Her name is on the screen, no emojis and pet names or anything. Just her name. She’s sent him two texts, and he tries to hide his eagerness as he unlocks his phone to see them.

come see me when you’re done with the boys

give them my love and bring me some molly pls xo

‘Wow. Not her trying to emotionally manipulate the guys into giving her molly,’ Felix laughs quietly, looking at Hyunjin’s screen, and Hyunjin can’t help but laugh too. She’s one of a kind. ‘She sends her love to you guys,’ Hyunjin says, knowing he won’t even have to ask for the molly. They’ll offer it, like they always do. She’s got them all wrapped around her finger.

‘She’s cute. We should link soon,’ Chan says, handing the joint to Jisung and punching him gently when he nearly drops it. ‘Yeah, the same thing happens every time we link. We get a booth in a club, last for about ten minutes before they kick us out for doing lines, and then those two disappear to fuck and abandon the rest of us,’ Minho says drily, motioning to Hyunjin, who’s busy trying to formulate a laidback reply.

‘Tell her… only if she’s good,’ Felix says under his breath, knowing Hyunjin’s situation better than anybody else (Hyunjin’s never told him, but Felix is wise beyond his years, and very observant), and Hyunjin types up the response. Only a few seconds later do the three little dots appear, and Hyunjin imagines her in his head, lying on her bed and typing with that cute little smile on her face.

I’m always good

I love being good

for you

Hyunjin feels his blood heat up more and more with each text she sends, Felix chuckling amusedly as Hyunjin’s fingers ghost over the keyboard. He never knows what to say, never knows how to be cool and collected around her. ‘You’re on your own, bro. She’s too good at this,’ Felix murmurs, and Hyunjin nods in agreement, desperately wracking his brains for a response, ignoring the current conversation the boys are having.

Before he even begins typing, another text from her comes through, and it’s a picture. His heart speeds up as he waits for it to load, itching to see what she’s sent. He has a folder on his phone dedicated to all the pictures she’s ever sent, and he visits that folder more often than he’d ever admit. When the picture finally loads, he feels his heart stop for a second, Felix so startled that he begins choking, and Hyunjin hits him on the back, eyes still locked onto his phone.

She’s in her bedroom, the lights all off, and she’s stood in front of her mirror, her body illuminated by the flash from her phone and the city lights streaming in from her window. She’s dressed in her completely sheer Dior robe. And nothing else.

‘Fucking hell,’ Felix says when he finally gets his breath back. The boys are all distracted from their conversation, looking over at Hyunjin and Felix with curiosity. ‘What’s going on?’ Jeongin asks, and Felix and Hyunjin are both silent for a moment. ‘She sent me a picture.’ ‘Let us see!’ Changbin says instantly, all of them looking at him with disgust. ‘No, you fucking creep.’ ‘You showed Felix!’ ‘I didn’t show him.’ ‘Yeah, I looked at the screen just as the picture loaded,’ Felix says, the boys all raising their eyebrows at him. ‘What a coincidence,’ Jisung says drily, Felix beginning to defend himself.

Hyunjin quickly becomes distracted with the picture again, unable to believe how lucky he is that a vision of beauty sends him pictures like this. He still isn’t used to the feeling of having someone so… perfect trust him enough to bare herself to him. And he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to it. How do you get used to something so… extraordinary?

‘The picture must be good. He can’t look away from his phone,’ Seungmin laughs, all the boys looking over at Hyunjin again. ‘At least… describe it to us,’ Changbin says, Hyunjin shooting him another dirty look. ‘Bro, just go watch some porn or something,’ Chan says, everyone bursting into laughter as Changbin shoves Chan. ‘I don’t want details. Just the gist of it,’ Changbin says, like a dog with a bone, and Hyunjin rolls his eyes.

‘It’s a mirror picture, and she’s wearing a robe.’ ‘Oh. That’s it? Bro, you’re down bad if you’re getting horny over that,’ Jisung says, and Felix bursts into laughter, Hyunjin unable to hold back his own chuckles. ‘You guys haven’t seen it, though.’ ‘If she’s fully clothed, it can’t be that sexy,’ Minho says, and Hyunjin and Felix laugh again. ‘The robe’s see-through,’ Hyunjin admits. When it comes to her, his pride and jealousy regularly battle, and leave him torn between showing her off and keeping her to himself.

‘It’s see-through? Like totally see-through?’ Jisung asks with wide eyes, and Hyunjin nods smugly. ‘And is she wearing anything else?’ Changbin asks, Hyunjin shaking his head with a grin, the boys all looking shocked. ‘Wow, she must really trust you, to send you a picture like that,’ Chan says disbelievingly, Hyunjin feeling smugger by the second.

‘What the fuck are you waiting for? Go to her, stupid,’ Jeongin urges, Hyunjin chuckling. ‘There’s no rush. She likes the long game,’ Hyunjin replies mildly, the others all shaking their heads in disbelief. ‘You’ve got it so good,’ Seungmin says, voice laced with envy, and Hyunjin can’t help but grin in response.

aren’t you gonna tell me I look good?

did I make you hard in front of your friends, jinnie?

are they all jealous bc your girl is so hot?

I bet they wanna fuck me like you do

only you get to fuck me though, jin

I only want you

only wanna be good for you

He stays with the boys for another hour, but his mind is elsewhere completely. The texts she sends him every few minutes fry his brain, and he feels himself getting needier with each one. He needs her. So many addictions in his life, but he’d give them all up for her. Fuck Mary Jane and Molly; she’s his favourite.

I’m thinking of you, jinnie

always thinking of you

And those texts are the ones that push him over the edge. Not the ones about how much she wants him, how good his dick is, how wet she is for him, but the ones that make him think she cares.

‘I’m heading off,’ Hyunjin says, getting up from his seat, and the boys all laugh and cheer. ‘Coming back after?’ Jeongin asks, and Hyunjin shrugs. ‘Probably,’ he says, pulling his jacket on. ‘Here, bro. I’ve got her favourites,’ Changbin says, holding a little plastic packet out to Hyunjin. The boy takes it, and he wants nothing more than to crush the pills into tiny little pieces. But he puts them in his pocket instead, their weight on his heart like bricks.

Hyunjin doesn’t waste any more time, driving like a madman to her apartment in the city centre, praying he doesn’t get a ticket but knowing that it’s worth it for her. He has a pass for her apartment block’s car park, and thankfully his usual space, the one beside her space, is empty. She has Hyunjin to drive her around most of the time, so her barely driven black Audi A5 with its D&G interior is in pristine condition. Hyunjin has a keycard to get into her apartment and he taps his foot impatiently as he scans it, the lift slowly moving upwards. He practically leaps through the doors when they open, stepping straight into her living room.

The lights are off, allowing a clear view through the floor to ceiling windows that look out over the city, but Hyunjin doesn’t care about that view. The view on his mind isn’t in here, and he exerts the last of his self-control as he heads towards her bedroom. When he reaches the open door of her room and she comes into his eyeline, his breath catches in his throat. She’s sat on her windowsill, looking out over the skyline with a wineglass in her hand, and he knows it isn’t wine that she’s drinking. It’s never something as weak as wine.

She looks like an angel, face serene and thrown into dim light from the city, and she’s not wearing the robe anymore. She’s in underwear, just a plain black Agent Provocateur set, but she looks like the most beautiful girl in the world to him. Practically everything in her room is Louis V, but she’s worth more than it all. He walks towards her slowly, and she knows he’s there but doesn’t look over at him. As he gets closer, he sees the black lines of mascara across her cheeks, her eyes red and swollen, and he isn’t sure whether it’s because she’s higher than a kite, or she’s lower than she’s ever been before.

‘Are you high?’ he asks her softly, and she lets out a gentle laugh. ‘No.’ ‘So you’ve been crying?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘You gonna tell me why?’ ‘No,’ she replies, voice like silk, and Hyunjin lets out a gentle sigh. ‘You can’t keep it all bottled up.’ ‘I can, and I will. I wanted you to come here to fuck me, not to be my therapist,’ she says tiredly, Hyunjin silent.

‘Did you bring my molly?’ she asks, and he just stares at her, waiting for her to look back at him. To actually look at him for once. ‘Hyunjin?’ Silence continues to fill the room, and after what feels like an eternity, she looks at him, her eyes shining with tears. ‘No.’ ‘You didn’t?’ ‘No. I brought you enough for a week on Tuesday. It’s Friday today.’ ‘I know what day it is. My health isn’t your problem.’ ‘I know it isn’t. But you should still have some left.’ ‘That’s not your concern. If I ask you to bring me something, you should bring it.’ ‘Stop being a fucking brat.’ ‘Stop being a fucking dick.’

He wants to scream at her, grab the glass from her hand and smash it against the wall, flush the pills in his pocket down the toilet. But he doesn’t. He just stands there, staring at her, and she stares back at him.

‘When was the last time you were sober?’ ‘For fuck’s sake, Jin, I can’t-’ ‘Answer the fucking question,’ he says angrily, and she flinches at his tone. ‘I… I’m sober now.’ ‘You’ve been drinking. When was the last time you were properly sober – no drugs or drink?’ She’s completely silent, and Hyunjin remains silent too, waiting for her response.

‘On Wednesday.’ ‘I’m not fucking stupid, stop lying to me.’ ‘I’m not lying!’ ‘I swear to God, I’m walking out of here if you don’t tell me the truth.’ ‘Then leave.’ ‘Don’t tell me to leave when that’s the last thing you want,’ he murmurs, and she just stares at him, eyes shining with tears.

‘Last week.’ ‘Stop lying!’ ‘I don’t fucking know, Jin! Maybe last week, maybe last month, maybe last year, maybe longer! I can’t fucking remember! I can’t even fucking see straight most days! You think I can remember when I was last sober? I’m never fucking sober!’ she screams, her voice shattering the silence, and Hyunjin feels his heart ache at the tears spilling down her face.

‘You’re slowly killing yourself.’ ‘You think I don’t know that? I’m not a fucking idiot, Jin! I haven’t got any delusions about my health!’ ‘If you know you’re dying, why don’t you stop?’ ‘You’re not an idiot either. You don’t need me to explain that to you,’ she says tiredly, as though all of her energy has suddenly flooded away.

Hyunjin’s eyes fill with tears at the realisation. She’s doing it on purpose because she wants to die.

‘Why? ‘What?’ ‘Why do you want to die?’ he asks softly, and she laughs humourlessly. ‘I told you; I don’t want a therapy session. That’s not why you’re here.’ ‘You’re insane if you think I’m gonna fuck you now,’ he says, the girl just staring at him.

‘This isn’t a film, Hyunjin, or a book. I’m not gonna magically decide to open up to you and cry on your shoulder and you hold me whilst I sleep and then you take me to DAA tomorrow and help me get sober. That’s not how this works. That’s not who I am, or who you are. You fuck me, or you leave.’ ‘I’m not gonna fuck you when you’re like this. I’m not a fucking monster,’ Hyunjin says harshly. ‘I might have to disagree with that,’ she murmurs before taking a sip from her drink.

‘You’ve had enough for tonight,’ Hyunjin says, the girl raising an eyebrow at him as she continues to drink. ‘I said that that’s enough,’ he spits angrily, and she flinches again, taking the glass from her lips a moment later. He holds out a hand to take it, and she hesitates before handing it to him, Hyunjin celebrating internally. It’s a step forward. It might be a small one, but it’s something.

He puts the glass down on her bedside table before taking a seat beside her on the windowsill. ‘You can leave.’ ‘I know,’ he says softly, and she doesn’t reply, looking back out over the city with tears streaming down her face. They sit in silence, looking at two different views, and Hyunjin feels like he could live in this moment. Her walls are up, but she’s letting him in, even if it is just for a little while.

‘You should go.’ ‘No.’ ‘Hyunjin-’ ‘I’m not leaving.’ ‘But why?’ she whispers, so much loneliness in her voice that his heart drops. ‘What do you mean?’ ‘Why are you staying? We’re not having sex, and we’re not in a relationship. You don’t have any obligations to stay,’ she murmurs, lips quivering as she speaks. ‘I know I don’t have any obligations, but I won’t leave you – not while you’re like this.’

They fall into silence again and it’s so heavy, weighing down both of their hearts. ‘No one ever stays,’ she says miserably, and he tilts his head questioningly. ‘My ex-boyfriends always left. My friends always leave. You always leave. My dad even left. So why are you staying now?’ she asks, and he’s devastated at her words. This is more than she’s ever told him, and he never expected to hear that this is her trauma. She’s got daddy issues, and that’s why she is the way she is. She’s a drug addict, an alcoholic, ridden with mental health illness, all because of her dad.

‘I’m all you have left, other than drugs and money.’ ‘That’s all I need.’ ‘If you’ve got what you need, why do you wanna die?’ ‘It’s all I need to survive. Not to live.’ ‘Don’t you want to live?’ ‘Of course I do. But not like this, not… haunted. Not weighed down. Not numb and empty, all the fucking time. I can’t escape. It’s all I am… when I’m sober. If I stay drunk, and high, I can forget it all. The second I start coming down, it all comes back, and it hurts so much. I just wanna feel… not even happy. Just… alive. For once. Without the help of alcohol and drugs and designer clothes. But they fill the emptiness inside me like nothing else does.’ ‘There’s so much more to life. Love, friendship, memories, nature, achievements.’ ‘I know, but my brain doesn’t work in that way. I could be… stood on top of the world, and I’d still feel like I want to die.’ ‘Let me help you,’ he replies, and she laughs.

‘You do help me. You help me fill the void my dad left behind. You’re an asshole. You might call me a good girl and praise me and baby me and treat me like a princess sometimes, but you’re emotionally unavailable, and you shout at me and get angry with me, and you’re never here when it matters which is good because I’d get attached if you were, and you’re horrible to me when we fuck, and you make me feel like I’m not good enough for you when you text other girls in front of me and check out every girl that passes us when we’re on a night out, and you never respond to the nudes I send you which makes me feel like I’m fucking ugly, but that’s okay because you’ll come and fuck me and I feel the validation that I need, and you never stay the night which makes me feel like you only ever want me for sex, but it’s okay because at least you like me enough to fuck me in the first place. You told me once that you won’t call me yours, but it’s okay because I’d rather my body be yours than none of me at all.’

She’s sobbing by the time she finishes speaking, struggling to breathe properly, and Hyunjin’s frozen in shock. He’s an asshole? No. He’s a guy who’s in love with her and doesn’t want her to know it, because she’s always told him that she doesn’t want his love, she wants his dick and his drugs. But maybe if he’d ignored her wishes, and openly loved her, she wouldn’t be so fucked up. She wouldn’t crave his worthless validation. She wouldn’t be so lonely that she wants to die.

‘But I’m-’ ‘No. Don’t you dare deny it and say some stupid fucking shit to try and manipulate me into thinking you care. You don’t have to. I know you couldn’t give a shit about me, and I’ve known for so long, and it doesn’t matter,’ she says, furiously wiping away her tears, and Hyunjin shakes his head, taking her trembling hands into his. ‘No, you don’t understand. I’m only like this because you pushed me away. We were so good at first, I used to openly adore you, but you pushed me away and told me that you didn’t want that from me.’ ‘Yeah, because I’m fucked up! I turned you into an asshole, and then fell in love with you! More fool fucking me! Can you just leave now?’ she asks, pulling her hands from his and looking away. His heart sings at her confession that she does love him, that this isn’t one-sided, but it quickly quietens when he sees the look on her face.

‘I’m literally trying to tell you that I’m in love with you too. I want to be with you, and do the things we’ve never done. Restaurant dates, and staying the night and laying with you, and shopping trips that don’t end up with us fucking in the Chanel back room – not that I’m complaining about that, obviously. But I just want to be with you. We could be so good together – just give us a chance. Things don’t have to be this way.’ ‘They are.’ ‘But they don’t have to be! Just give me a day. A day to be more than your dick appointment and your dealer. All I need is one day with you, and I can make the pain better.’

‘No, Hyunjin. Just go,’ she says quietly, the tears gone and her voice calm. She’s shutting herself off again, pushing him back out, and it makes him panic. ‘Don’t do this. This is your chance to be happy, for us to be happy together.’ ‘No. Leave, like you always do,’ she murmurs, and he can see the city lights reflected in her eyes, the galaxy held between her lashes.

‘I only left because you wanted me to.’ ‘I still want you to.’ ‘But you love me.’ ‘They don’t cancel each other out.’ ‘That doesn’t-’ ‘Make any sense? I know. I don’t make any sense. I want love, but I’m scared of it. I hate my dad for abandoning me, but I only ever want guys that abandon me so if you stay, I’ll fall out of love with you, or I’ll push you away like I did when we first started fucking so that I can carry on loving you. I was never treated right, but I only ever want guys that treat me badly, so if you treat me right, I’ll get bored of you. I never got love from my dad, so I’ve been running from it my whole life, and that isn’t gonna change. I’ve driven myself insane for years, trying so hard to understand why I’m like this, but I am, and you should just accept that instead of trying work me out.’

Hyunjin just blinks, trying to process her words. Where does he win? The only way he can have her is carrying on being the asshole he’s been for the past few years, but there’s only so long he can keep that up when he’s falling more and more in love with her by the day. But if he openly loves her, she won’t want him anymore. Hyunjin makes a vow that if, by chance, he ever encounters her dad, he’s gonna beat the shit out of him. And he also makes a vow that he’s gonna help her, get her to therapy or DAA, because there’s no other way he can see a positive outcome.

‘You should just leave.’ ‘How can I leave you like this?’ ‘Because I can’t love you if you stay. I don’t love people who stay, and I never have. So… go. Please,’ she says, no emotion, no nothing in her voice, or on her face. She looks like one of those ancient marble statues, passive and cold but beautiful. And Hyunjin knows that he doesn’t want to live a life without her in it, so he does the only thing he can tonight, the only thing that won’t push her away.

‘Fine. I’ll fucking leave, since you keep fucking telling me to,’ he says harshly, the girl flinching at the suddenness of him pushing himself off the windowsill, feet landing heavily on the floor. ‘Came here to fuck you, and you’re fucking crying instead. You’re such a fucking mess. I should have brought your fucking molly. At least you keep your fucking mouth shut when you’re rolling. Never tell me to come over if you’re in your feels again, ‘cause I don’t wanna sit here and listen to you whine about your shitty dad,’ he mutters angrily, loathing himself for the words he’s using against her, the kind of words he’s subjected her to for so long, the words that made her fall in love with him.

Despite his brain screaming at him to not look back before leaving, he does it anyway, and when he sees her reaching for her glass again, eyes filled with tears and lips curled up into a sad smile, he feels his heart break into a million little pieces. He should knock the glass out of her hand. He should tell her how much he loves her, and how he’s not gonna give up on them. He should force her to get into his car, take her to rehab, and tell her that he won’t stand by and watch her slowly kill herself. But he squares his shoulders, ignoring the clink of her glass against her Cartier rings, and leaves her bedroom with the weight of the world on his shoulders and her face in his mind.

[so-writing]

Things You Never Show - Rafe Cameron x Reader x JJ Maybank (Outer Banks)

I was in my BSB feels, listening to ‘Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely’ and this happened. Not proofread so mistakes most likely

Summary: You are a pogue dating Rafe Cameron and, as expected, chaos ensues.

--

You could be the center of attention at a party and still feel ignored. 

Rafe was a good boyfriend, at best, half of the time. When the two of you were alone, he was more than happy to fulfill your every desire and make you feel like you were on top of the world. He made sure you were satisfied in every way and it was heaven to you.

But when you were out and about, like at a kegger in the boneyard, Rafe acted like a stranger.

-

“You know he treats you like shit, right?”

A figure you didn’t immediately recognize dropped down beside you on the edge of the dock you were seated on, dipping your toes into the water.

“He’s an asshole and you deserve better.” 

You were about to protest until you looked toward the stranger and met the eyes of JJ Maybank. The boy you’d pined after for years when you were younger. Even though you were past your crush, you couldn’t shake his gaze. 

“Cameron is a piece of shit, you know.” 

“He’s not,” you defended, “he just doesn’t know any better.”

“He doesn’t know that he shouldn’t flirt carelessly with other girls when he’s obviously locked down? He’s an asshole.”

You should’ve protested JJ’s musings but you knew he was right and that there was no defending Rafe.

“Maybe, but he’s my asshole.”

It was a weak argument, confirmed by the chuckle JJ released before he took a hit of his blunt.

“There are about a million people in the world that would treat you better than Rafe, but you’re stuck on baby money for reasons I couldn’t possibly understand.”

JJ turned his head and blew smoke away from you before he stood up, ruffled your hair and made his way back to the party.

The friendship between you and the other pogues had existed for as long as you could remember and you weren’t quite sure when JJ became someone you looked at just a little differently. You harbored secret feelings that you were never able to spill and they eventually faded when you matured some and started noticing other boys. 

Rafe Cameron was one of those boys. He didn’t attend Kildare Public, his parenting opting instead to send him to the fancy private school that all the kooks seemed to attend, but he regularly showed up at boneyard parties and that was when he first caught your eye. 

Two years older than you and a haughty asshole, he was exactly what you thought you wanted. Rafe being and kook and you a pogue, you assumed he wouldn’t be interested at all but that wasn’t the case and not much time had gone by until you were spending your nights in his bed. 

The first time you went public as a couple was over a year ago and you were now comfortable in feeling lonely a lot of the time, despite what felt like the entire world knowing you were attached to Rafe Cameron.

“But he’s my asshole,” you said to yourself when JJ had gone, “what a fucking stupid excuse.” 

Feeling dumb and embarrassed, you pulled your feet out of the water and slid into your sandals. Rafe might have noticed your absence and you weren’t feeling up to getting into an argument over where you could have been, not that he cared anyway. 

You found him sitting on a log around one of the few bonfires at the party with his arm wrapped around a girl you didn’t recognize. He was obviously drunk, maybe a little high as well, and you knew you couldn’t say anything to either of them without facing the consequences later. 

He laughed at something Kelce said as he wrapped his arm tighter around the girl, pulling her close enough to kiss her forehead. This behavior was new to you. He always flirted with randoms in public, giving them a hug or rub on the back but Rafe had never put his lips on someone else, that you knew of. 

“See that?” 

JJ’s breath ghosted across your neck, he stood behind you and placed his palms on your shoulders, “he’s an asshole. You know you can do better.” 

“JJ,” you shook him off and turned around to meet his eyes, “this is just how he is. He doesn’t give a shit about that girl.”

“He gives a shit about you though, right?” 

“Yes,” you bit the inside of your cheek as a reminder to keep your composure, “he does.”

He laughed, an easy chuckle that made you equal parts furious and peaceful, while grabbing your hand and pulling you toward the rest of the pogues sat around a neighboring bonfire.

“Raise your hand if you think this one can do better than Cameron?” 

Everyone around the fire, including Rafe’s own sister Sarah, raised their arms above their heads. 

“You guys are not supportive at all.”

The laugh that followed your statement was supposed be happy and jokey but it left your lips hollow and angry.

“No,” Sarah began, “we’re not. He’s my brother and I love him but he is a grade A piece of shit when it comes to the way he treats women.”

She unwrapped herself from John B and stood up, walking over to you and taking your hands in hers, “you do not deserve that. You are better than him.”

“Guys,” you gently squeezed her hands, “I don’t need this. I’m fine. I know how he is.”

“That is the second time I’ve heard you say that tonight,” JJ piped up, “and I haven’t believed it either time.”

His tone was almost cocky, he too had quite a bit to drink, and you weren’t about to get into this with your friends in the middle of a party where everyone could hear you. 

“John B, can you give a ride home? I just really want to leave right now.” 

The brunette gave you a quick nod of his head and the two of you walked in silence away from the beach and to the Twinkie waiting in the parking lot. You both entered the van in silence and he pushed the key into the ignition, bringing the vehicle to life. 

John B drove toward your house without a word, something you were more grateful for than you could say. He pulled into your driveway and you noticed that no lights were on the house. Your parents were either out for the evening or fast asleep, either one was good, it meant you didn’t have to face their innocent questions about your night and your boyfriend. 

“Hey,” John B put the Twinkie in park, “you know I’m not here to judge you or your relationship but I just want to say this.”

You prepared yourself for another bashing of Rafe. They happened pretty frequently, especially when JJ was around. 

“Rafe is not my favorite person, I’ll never hide that. I’m worried about you. I’m worried this rich douchebag is taking advantage of you and sucking the life out of you. I just want you to know that we’re here. We love you, we have you. Please say something if you need any of us.” 

Your heart warmed at his words as you quickly unbuckled your seatbelt and leaned across the center console to give him a hug, “thank you John B, I needed that more than you know.”

Sliding from the passenger seat, you closed the door behind you and turned to give John B a wave before going inside and heading straight to your room. You were used to your friends hating on Rafe but what John B said about the situation had you seriously thinking about your relationship with the charming kook. 

The words ‘sucking the life out of you’ repeated themselves in your head as you lay on your side trying to fall asleep.

 -

Your constantly buzzing phone finally pulled you from slumber at, you checked the time before responding to anything else, 2:36am.

Rafe (11:04)  where are you?

Rafe (11:16)  seriously

Rafe (11:41)  what the fuck

Rafe (12:21)  you left with JJ? Really? Maybank? REALLY

Rafe (1:18)  you went home with Maybank so I’m going home with a blonde too

Rafe (2:04)  I’m sorry. I should have paid more attention to you tonight

Rafe (2:17)  baby please I’m sorry

Rafe (2:36)  call me when you wake up. I love you. 

Normally, when this happened, you would be wooed by Rafe’s apology but John B’s words swan around in your head as you noted the forty-six minutes that passed between Rafe claiming he’d take someone home and his apology.

“Fuck this,” you whispered into to your empty room as you tossed your phone to the floor and rolled over to fall asleep once again. 

-

It was 2:46 in the afternoon when you woke up. You’d slept longer than you intended and when you grabbed your phone from the ground you where met with a marathon of messages and calls.

Not counting what he sent the night before, Rafe had called you 14 times and sent 38 text messages. Most of them were angry, some of them apologetic, but the theme was clear: he hated JJ. 

You scrolled past the many Rafe’s and found your conversation with JJ. 

“J, please text me back as soon as you get this.”

You knew Rafe and you knew he would go after JJ and he would hurt him if he could. Staring at your phone sitting in your hands for about a minute, you decided you couldn’t wait and called him. 

JJ’s phone rang and rang and just as you were about to hang up, he answered. 

“Hey, sorry, was outside with John B, what’s up?”

“JJ,” you breathed a sigh of relief, “Rafe thinks I went home with you. Watch out for him, I have no doubt he’s on a warpath.”

“Him being on a warpath means he has to publicly declare that you’re someone he actually gives a fuck about, he’s not going to do that or come after me.”

“J, please,” you ran a hand through your hair, “please just be careful.”

“Always am. See you tonight?”

“Yeah,” you had completely forgotten about Kiara’s birthday party, “see you then.” 

-

Walking into the Wreck, things looked mostly normal. The main dining room was full of patrons eating and socializing. The restaurant was on a short wait but you slid past the people in line and made toward the smaller of the two decks off the side of the restaurant. 

There were only three tables on the small deck and tonight they were all pushed together for Kiara’s celebration. The usual suspects were present: JJ, Pope, John B and Sarah. Kie’s mom had taken the night off so she was staying permanently while her dad planned to pop in during his free moments. 

“You showed,” JJ shouted as he slid out his chair and trotted toward you, pulling you into a hug.

“Of course I did, I would never miss this. Happy birthday Kiara,” you shook off JJ and moved to hug Kie, wrapping your arms tight around her small frame. 

Your phone vibrated in your pocket and Kie pulled away enough to give you a questioning look.

“It’s your birthday and I’m pissed at him. All messages remain unread tonight.” 

While you enjoyed yourself eating seafood and cake with your friends, you had no idea how serious Rafe was taking your radio silence. You hadn’t responded to any of his texts or calls and the last time you spoke was before the kegger the previous night.

Rafe (7:46)  Where are you? We haven’t talked at all today

Rafe (8:04)  Seriously what the fuck 

Rafe (8:37)  There you are. Sitting to next to Maybank huh

Rafe (8:49)  Fuck it

The messages remained unread and when your chair was harshly pulled away from the table and your friends began yelling did you realize what was happening.

“Rafe! What the fuck?!” Sarah was the loudest, her words cutting through the air.

“I’m tired of this and I’m done. She’s coming with me.”

You hoped against hope that JJ wouldn’t say anything but you knew better. He never failed to come to your rescue but now wasn’t the time you needed him to do so. 

“You don’t get to claim someone when you’re fucking literally everybody else.” 

Rafe’s hands were no longer on your body or the chair you were seated in, instead he was charging toward JJ. The blonde had removed himself from the chair next to you and was now standing his ground, nose to nose with Rafe Cameron.

They began to push each other and one particularly hard shove from JJ sent Rafe into the table, causing everyone to jump up and back away from the fight. 

“Guys, please! Not here!” 

You were nearly in tears, your words falling on deaf ears and they continued to throw punches and accusations. 

Time seemed to slow as you took in everything happening in front of you. Kiara’s mom had her arms wrapped Kie as she ushered her back into the restaurant. Pope and John B were both standing in front of Sarah, blocking her off but ready to jump in and defend their friend if they needed to. Various pieces of seafood were scattered across the small deck and Kiara’s cake was destroyed, icing and cake bits stomped into the floor from all the commotion. 

Everything had gone wrong. You never went home with JJ and you should have made that clear to Rafe. You should’ve responded to his texts earlier, explaining and begging his forgiveness even though you didn’t really want it. 

You ruined Kiara’s birthday and maybe the reputation of The Wreck itself. JJ and Rafe had been pulled apart now but it was too late to salvage anything. Slowly making your way toward the railing, you jumped over the side and landed a few feet below in the soft mud a few feet away from the water. 

It didn’t matter that your shoes were thick with mud, you trampled out of the swamp and toward the road. When your shoes were light enough, you broke into a run. It didn’t matter how you looked, everything was ruined and as much as you wanted to place the blame on either of the combative boys, it was all your fault. 

All you wanted to do now was fucking disappear. 

[sokkascroptop]

traitor. (sokka x f!reader) pt 10

part 1 | part 9 | part 11

A/N: it only took 10 parts but....we have Sokka and Y/N interacting!! If you’ve read the atla comics this is inspired by “The Bridge”. If not, it doesn’t matter! This is just what happens after Aang is injured by Azula and before Season 3 episode 1

Everything about being on the boat made Y/N uncomfortable. She had fought with Katara and Aang in the crystal cave proudly, but now that she was out in the open and more people knew what she had done, she felt like an imposter. She still held the weight of regret high on her shoulders, especially now that she realized that no one was ever going to fully trust her. Nobody was going to trust someone who was willing to change sides in a war. She would always be a traitor whichever side she landed on. 

“I told you Sokka, she helped Aang and I. She’s staying.” Y/N could tell Katara’s patience was waning. Two days aboard the Water Tribe ship and she had told her brother and the earthbender––Toph––what had happened in the catacombs four times, and yet Sokka was still persistent that Y/N needed to leave. The four of them were sitting below deck in the mess hall drinking tea from thick ceramic mugs. It was colder being on the water and Y/N was grateful for the warmth. 

“Look, we can even be nice and give her one of the canoes!” Sokka countered. He gave Y/N a pointed look. “You know, as opposed to throwing you out of sea.”

Y/N nodded. “Yup, I caught that. Thank you.” Y/N really didn’t like that they were talking about her like she wasn’t sitting next to them.

“Snoozles, I think you need to give it a rest,” Toph said. She sipped out of her tea cup and pressed her knee into Y/N’s. The girl had either taken a quick liking to Y/N or she really liked to piss Sokka off, and Y/N guessed it was the latter. 

Sokka ignored her. “We should leave it up to Dad whether we take her as a prisoner or not.”

“He has more important things to worry about, and so do I!” Katara yelled. She stood, nearly spilling her teacup. She pressed it into Sokka’s hands. “And she’s not a prisoner!” She left the room fuming, likely to go check on Aang who was unconscious in the healer’s room. 

Y/N looked around the room awkwardly. “Does this boat even have, like a place to hold prisoners?”

Sokka glared at her. 

“Yeah, so this is fun, but I’m going to go find anything else to do.” Toph moved to leave only to have Sokka pull her back down. 

“I want to hear it again. From her, not Katara.”

Y/N couldn’t help but groan. “Again?”

“Why do you need me here?” Toph sat down again. 

“Tell me if she’s lying.”

“She isn’t interested in lying to the people who are keeping her safe right now. I’m a fugitive,” Y/N said angrily. “I watched someone who I used to call my best friend nearly kill her uncle. I watched her become a person I didn’t recognize anymore because of this mission. Except,” Y/N turned her empty cup over in her hands. “I’m beginning to think she was always that person, and it wasn’t her that changed, it was me.”

“She’s not lying, Sokka.” 

He didn’t look convinced. “Look, all I know is that the Fire Nation is full of evil people. You can’t just expect us to forgive you–”

“I don’t,” Y/N interrupted. “I know you’re mad. I can see the looks the crew gives me. I don’t expect forgiveness from anyone. I don’t even think I forgive myself yet,” she painfully admitted. “I just need redemption.” 

What she had said didn’t look like it had convinced Sokka any and Toph’s expression was the same as it was before. 

“Come on, let’s go for a walk on the deck, Toph.” 

They left, and Y/N was alone. Y/N picked uncomfortably at the hem of the tunic Katara gave her to wear. The green pants were three inches too short when she bent her knees and the actual tunic was almost immodestly tight but it was the kindness that Katara showed her by giving them to Y/N, even if they were just some Earth Kingdom clothes she was given while she was in Ba Sing Se. 

Everything about being on the boat made Y/N uncomfortable. She had fought with Katara and Aang in the crystal cave proudly, but now that she was out in the open and more people knew what she had done, she felt like an imposter. She still held the weight of regret high on her shoulders, especially now that she realized that no one was ever going to fully trust her. Nobody was going to trust someone who was willing to change sides in a war. She would always be a traitor whichever side she landed on. 

Y/N wandered below deck after leaving the mess hall. There wasn’t much to see, the ship wasn’t as large as a Fire Nation ship, just one hallway and a smattering of doors that she probably wasn’t allowed in. Ahead of her though, was a door that was cracked open; the healer’s room. Y/N peeked through the crack at Katara kneeling over Aang. She must have just finished a healing session with him, and she was muttering to herself. 

“–have to get better.”

The boat rocked as it crested a wave and Y/N bumped into the door startling Katara. She lifted the water from the basin she was using and then immediately dropped it when she saw who it was. 

Y/N, caught now, closed the door softly behind her. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” She pretended not to see Katara blink tears out of her eyes.

“I was finished anyways.”

“How is he?” Y/N asked, unable to come up with anything else to say.

Katara looked back at him and Y/N followed her gaze. He looked like a little kid, not the all powerful Avatar she had seen a day ago.  

“The same as before. Hey,” she pointed at Y/N’s head. “Do you want me to heal that cut some more?” 

Y/N lightly traced the gash on her forehead that she’d received when her and Katara were thrown into the rocks by Zuko and Azula. It reached into her hairline and the only reason she let Katara use her healing powers at all was because it was still bleeding when they’d boarded the ship. She’d only had the energy after healing Aang to close it enough for it to stop bleeding.

“No, don’t worry about me.” Y/N smiled and left without another word, feeling like an intruder. She didn’t need any more hospitality from them. 

---

There weren’t any spare hammocks on the ship for them so the four of them slept on the floor in the crew cabin. They laid out fur pelts underneath their sleeping bags to make it softer; and much like the night before, Y/N was in the middle between Katara and Toph, Sokka at their feet. 

Y/N knew this arrangement was purposeful. They were still suspicious of her, and if she was surrounded by them she would have a harder time getting up and leaving. She wasn’t a prisoner, but she wasn’t free to roam either. 

For the first time in a long time, she dreamt of home; of playing on the beaches and swimming in the warm ocean. She was happy and Y/N realized she hadn’t felt like that in a long time. She didn’t even mind when she was woken up by Toph kicking her in the shin the next morning. 

“Come on, we need to go above deck.”

“Why?” 

“They spotted a Fire Nation ship.”

Y/N had never pulled her boots on faster. She braided her hair on the way as they ran up the steps. It seemed like the whole crew was milling around the deck, muttering in small groups, all eyes turned to the east where a trail of black smoke announced the arrival of enemies. 

Hakoda nodded at her as Y/N and Toph approached. He’d been just as cautious with Y/N as the rest of the crew, but nicer to her than his son. “Do you know what kind of ship that is?” 

Y/N tied off her braid and threw it over her shoulder she squinted and leaned on the rail. “Looks kind of small, maybe a scouting ship?”

Hakoda hummed. “That means we’re going to be outnumbered fast.”

“We won’t be able to fight them, ‘Koda,” Bato warned. “And we can’t run, our sails are torn to shreds from our last fight with them.” 

The two shared a look. Surely, they weren’t thinking of surrendering, were they?

 Katara evidently thought the same. “We have to think about Aang, Dad. We can’t let the Fire Nation have him! We have to protect him.”

“We will! All we have to do is think of a plan.” Sokka seemed unusually happy for their situation.

Beside him, Toph punched his arm. “Alright, idea guy! Lay it on us.” 

“If we can’t beat them, join them!” Sokka beamed.

 Y/N let out a humorless laugh. “You can’t possibly be suggesting that we switch sides.”

“What, are you excited about seeing some of your Fire Nation buddies?” he asked, his voice was light, almost joking, but she could hear the accusation. 

“Sokka!” Katara clenched her jaw. 

He held up his hands. “Okay, okay, sorry!” He did not sound sorry. “What I meant is that we just switch boats.”

Katara, Bato and Hakoda stared at Sokka like he was insane. Toph gave him another punch on the arm. “That’s your plan?!”

 Y/N on the other hand, nodded her head. “Huh.”

Hakoda looked at her like he was looking at Sokka moments ago. “You think that this could work?”

“Yeah, I do actually,” Everyone seemed surprised that she agreed with Sokka. Especially Sokka. “I mean, scouting ships have soldiers on them but they aren’t the best fighters and they don’t station firebenders on them. Their job low risk; just to scout out enemies and relay messages back to bigger ships. If we could find a way to sneak up on them it is very possible that you have enough warriors to take them out and steal the ship.” 

Nobody had anything to say to that. Hakoda grabbed Sokka’s shoulder. “Alright, what’s the plan, son?”

---

Sink the fleet.

Y/N still couldn’t believe that this was Sokka’s “brilliant” idea. And she really couldn’t believe that Hakoda had let them go through with it.

Y/N looked back from her place at the front of the canoe to the smashed wooden ships behind them. The point was to make it look like the Water Tribe had already been beaten, so Katara and Toph had used their bending to flood and crush the ships. It was sad for her to watch it all happen, she couldn’t imagine what it was like for the warriors who had called the ships ‘home’ for years.

A sharp kick to the bench under her jerked her out of her thoughts. “Keep paddling! You’re making us turn the wrong way.” 

Y/N put her oar back into the water and wondered how good it would feel if she just slipped a little and let her elbow fly back into Sokka’s nose. Just how cute would the Water Tribe boy be with two black eyes and a broken nose? 

Y/N swallowed down her anger. “Oh shut up, I haven’t done this since I was nine.”

---

The Water Tribe had found a treeline to camp in for the night. At dusk the next day, they would attack the Fire Nation ship. 

Y/N lay in the grass a few feet away from the Chief, Katara and Sokka and Toph, staring at the stars. She traced the constellations she knew with her eyes, she was just looking for ‘the dragon’ when the stars were blotted out with a figure standing over her. 

“Come sit with us by the fire. It’s cold out.” Sokka crossed his arms. 

Y/N shook her head and sat up. “Thanks, but I’m good.”

He dug the toe of his boot into the grass. “They won’t let me come back until I bring you.”

“Oh, that’s too bad.” Y/N smiled and flopped back onto her back. “Guess you won’t be eating dinner!”

Sokka raised an eyebrow. “Is this punishment for being mean to you?”

Y/N rolled her eyes. She could tell him that, yeah it probably was, but it wouldn’t be fair of her. Y/N was pretty sure he had a right to be mad with her for joining out of the blue. 

“If you can be nice over dinner, I’ll go over there with you.” Y/N nodded towards the fire. Katara turned away quickly when she locked eyes with Y/N. 

“Deal! I’m starving.” Sokka held a hand out to help her up. Whether it was because he was trying to be nice or force of habit, she accepted it and let him pull her to her feet. 

They let go of each other quickly and didn’t look at each other on the walk over. 

Turns out it was easy for Sokka to keep his promise because he ignored her the whole time and spent the entire meal chattering about the plan for tomorrow with his dad. It was fine with her, Y/N was more interested in Katara’s silence than anything. Anytime either of the men tried to talk to her she shut them down or snapped at her father. 

She nudged Katara’s elbow. “Are you okay?”

She looked up from where she was scowling into her bowl of food. “Huh? Oh, yeah, I’m fine.” 

Y/N nodded. Katara was lying but Y/N didn’t want to press. She could have been stressed about Aang who was still unconscious in the tent behind them. And if there was anything going on between her and her dad, it wasn’t Y/N’s place to meddle in, especially when her relationship with the Water Tribe was as precarious as it was. But something gnawed at the thought of leaving it completely alone. “Let me know. If you want to talk, or something.” Y/N shrugged noncommittally.

Katara didn’t say anything the rest of the night to her, not until they had snuggled into their sleeping bags around the dying fire and Sokka had already started snoring. Somehow, Katara knew Y/N was still awake. 

“Thanks, Y/N.” She whispered the words so quietly that they could have been Y/N’s imagination. She figured out it was real when she opened her eyes to find Katara closing hers. Y/N smiled and tucked her head closer to her chest and fell asleep to the buzzing of cicada-bats in the trees. 

---

The next day, Hakoda did something that surprised her. “Here.” He thrust Y/N’s sheathed sword under her nose. She was seated on a rock next to their smoldering fire, just hours before the Tribe planned on leaving to raid the Fire Nation ship. All around her, warriors were sharpening their swords and spears.  

“Um, thank you?” Y/N hesitantly reached out for it, wondering if this was a trick. She had turned it over to him the moment she slid off of the Appa’s back. And to be completely honest, she wasn’t expecting to get it back at all. 

“I want you to come with us.” 

Y/N widened her eyes. No one had explicitly told her, she wasn't going, she just expected to be left behind. “Why?”

“I heard you can fight.” 

Y/N wondered which sibling gave him that information because that could be a good or a bad thing. She lifted one shoulder in a small shrug. “A little.”

He chuckled. “I also heard of a few of my warriors making a bet on when you would turn on us.” He started to walk away. “Don’t make me lose silver to Bato because I think you’ll stick around.”

---

The only sound around was the soft lapping of water against the metal sides of the ship. Y/N’s heart began race and her muscles tensed in anticipation. She drummed her fingers on the side of the canoe, not able to keep still.

Behind her, Katara was less enthused about being brought along. “I should be with Aang, not here.” She muttered to Toph. 

“Aang is going to be fine. And once we take this ship he’s going to have somewhere safe to recover.” Katara went silent. 

As quiet as possible, the Water Tribe warriors scaled the side of the ship with grappling hooks and rope. Y/N could hear shouts of surprise come from the soldiers on the deck as they jumped over the railing. 

When it was Y/N’s turn, she landed on the metal deck next to Toph and Katara. Some warriors had split off to taken down any soldiers on the bridge as well as look for soldiers sleeping below deck. Katara bent water over the railing to knock down three soldiers that rushed them. Two more came from the right; one of them wielding a spear, the other a dao. Y/N deflected the tip of the spear and sliced down, snapping the wood in half. She kicked him in the chest, and he skidded backwards on the deck. She parried a strike from the other soldier, and sent her elbow flying into his face, bringing him to his knees. 

Y/N watched in awe as Toph ripped a piece of the railing off the boat and bent it around the two of them on the ground, restraining them back to back. Y/N looked around the deck and noticed Sokka kneeling, tying another soldier’s hands behind his back. What he didn’t see what the Fire Nation soldier who was sneaking up behind him.

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat and she ran. 

She got there just in time to intercept his sword with her own. But catching him so late in the blow cost Y/N her upward momentum and the tip of her sword scraped the deck. She grabbed his wrist and pushed it away. She brought her left knee up into his side, using their closeness as an advantage. He groaned and bent forward. She swung the flat of her blade against his wrist, forcing him to drop his sword on the deck. For good measure, she grabbed the back of his head and sent her knee into his face. The soldier sprawled back on the deck; dazed, with a bloody nose. 

Snickering behind her drew Y/N’s attention. She watched as Hakoda elbowed Bato in the chest, and Bato, irritated, pushed him away. 

“I told you so!” Hakoda called after him. 

---

Y/N was surprised when Katara said that she could have her own room. 

“Everyone else, has their own. We figured you would want one too.” she shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal and left. Except it was a huge deal. Y/N grinned. They weren’t worried anymore that she was going to wake up in the middle of the night and go on a murder spree. They were giving her an inch of trust and that meant everything to Y/N. She knew that she had a long way to go, but this was something. 

She pulled her hair out of it’s tangled braid and dropped her sword–which Hakoda had allowed her to keep–next to her bed roll before collapsing onto it. She sat back up immediately as someone knocked on her door. 

“Yeah?” she called, crossing her legs. She began to comb the knots out of her hair with her fingers. 

She dropped her hands in surprise when Sokka opened the door. He closed the door behind him and leaned on the wall just inside. 

Suddenly the room felt stiflingly hot. He had traded his blue Water Tribe clothes for a soldier’s uniform and replaced his wolfs-tail with a Fire Nation top knot. 

“What’s up?”

Sokka shifted uncomfortably on his feet. “I want you to teach me how to sword-fight.”

“Oh?” Y/N was surprised to hear that come out of his mouth. “Why?”

“I would have died if you hadn’t been there,” Sokka admitted. “I feel like I rely on the others too much in a fight. I’ve never had a Master to teach me anything.” 

“Well, I’m not a Master,” Y/N said apologetically. She could understand where he was coming from. She was born into a family of firebenders as the only nonbender and it made her special in all the wrong ways. She had to be good at something to survive.

“Maybe not in title, but you’re good. Really good. I–actually never mind.” Sokka turned the handle to the door.

“No, wait! I’ll do it!” She shot up and grabbed his arm. It didn’t matter how much he had hated her twenty-four hours ago. This was something they had in common and if she ever wanted to be in their good graces, she needed to do this. 

“Yeah?” He looked hopeful, and little surprised like he figured she would have said no. 

“How about we start tomorrow?” Y/N asked. She realized her hand was still wrapped around his wrist. She pulled back and crossed her arms. 

Sokka nodded. “Tomorrow.”

---

A/N: now I’m just trying to decide how much of a slow-burn this is going to be.... ALSO two things! One: you’ll notice that I keep mentioning her being a non-bender. You’re all like, “yeah, yeah we know.” but it’s important!! If you haven’t read the Imbalance comics, I highly recommend you do. I have taken some of the issues from that and decided to use them in here because they moved me so much. Being a non-bender is part of Y/N just as much as being a waterbender is to Katara. It defines her, even if she doesn’t like it. Two: No Master Piandao here because, why would we when we can get Sokka and Y/N bonding over sparring and sword-fighting lessons? :)

Taglist: @myexgirlfriendisthemoon @reclusive-chicken-nugget @astroninaaa @aangsupremacy​ @beifongsss @crownofcryptids @welovediaaxx​ @littlefluu​ @lozzybowe​ @thebluelcdy​ @ohjustlookalive @sugarmoongey​ @fanficdepot​ @teenbiology​ @13-09-01​ @riespage​ @davnwillcome​ @naanlianid​ @creation-magician​ @lunariasilver​ @vintagerose1014516 @bcifcng​

[collecting-stories]

The Arrival - Ep. 01 - JJ Maybank

Summary: The pogues (and Sarah) decide to get away from the Outer Banks for senior week though Sarah’s suggestion that they spend the vacation with a friend of hers doesn’t sit well with JJ, who just wanted a week away with friends. Though his opinion of the situation may change his expectation that nothing will go according to plan is truer than they could have hoped.

A/N: This is a ‘they’re just regular teens and there was no gold hunt’ AU. This will be a 5 part story. 

The S’week Masterlist | Outer Banks Masterlist

///

“No.” JJ shook his head, “no, no, absolutely not.”  

“Why not?” Sarah asked, looking back at her boyfriend for support. John B quickly looked away, staring out at the marsh in order to avoid the conversation.

“Why not? Because I’m not spending senior week with a bunch of fucking kooks while they prance around like their in some MTV reality show!” JJ stresses, voice raised. He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it stuck up all over the place.  

“It might not be so bad,” Kie cut in, regretting it almost immediately when JJ looked over at her, “you said yourself that we’ve done senior week here...let’s do ours somewhere else?”

“Sure. Wherever you want as long as it’s not a trip to kookland.”  

“You are so dramatic, oh my god JJ. Last time I checked you weren’t exactly rolling in it. How do you propose we pay for a week down the beach?” Sarah pointed out.  

“You got money.”

“You shouldn’t even be going! It’s not like you fucking graduated, this is senior week. For graduating seniors.” Sarah waved her hand to indicate her, John B, Kiara, and Pope.  

“Screw you!”

“Guys!” Pope finally intervened, pushing his best friend back, “okay, let’s cool down.”  

“Can we please just go to the keys? I’m sick of wasting my time arguing. If we’re going we need to leave tomorrow morning...early.” Sarah said, looking pointedly at JJ.

“Hey, I’m always on time!”  

Despite his protests JJ was exactly where he said he’d be on Friday morning at 5:30a. Sitting outside John B’s house, on time and with his bag packed for Florida. He was the first one to arrive, followed by Kiara who’d almost been early if it wasn’t for the half hour argument she’d gotten into with her mom for leaving the week after graduation. As if that wasn’t ritual.  

JJ said nothing, unusually quite and still completely pissed that everyone had been so on board with Sarah’s plan to spend Senior Week in Florida with some friend at their grandparents’ vacation home. He wanted a chill holiday, just the four of them (five because John B couldn’t be separated from Sarah) spending every day on the beach. He didn’t want some kook vacation laying around a pool drinking vodka in crystal light and talking about ‘daddy’s credit card’ and whatever dumb shit else they did on their weekends.  

With the Twinkie packed to exploding with teenagers and luggage John B took the first leg of the drive south. JJ spent the trip sitting behind the passenger’s seat, rolling blunts in his lap and ignoring his friends excitement for senior week. When Kiara nudged his leg halfway to Florida and he looked over she smiled sympathetically at him.  

“It might be a good week.” Kiara tried to sound reassuring, knowing that it was JJ’s idea to go away in the first place and that they had in fact hijacked his plans, “at least the change of scenery will be nice?”

“So far the only good thing about this trip is not being home for a week.” JJ replied, refocusing on his task. He would definitely murder one of them if he didn’t spend the week at least somewhat buzzed. If you asked anyone in the obx they’d tell you that JJ was laid back and chill, a go-with-the-flow, weed smoking, kid who would probably never grow out of his ‘it is what it is’ phase. But that wasn’t JJ at all. Sure, he could hit up a kegger at the drop of a hat but he liked a plan and he liked the plan to consider him as an important factor. Not just another nameless sidekick to John B’s summer. And so far, that’s exactly what this senior week was shaping up to become.  

“It’ll be fine dude.” Pope said, voice low so he wouldn’t draw anyone else’s attention in the van.  

JJ looked up at him and frowned before nodding. What else could he do but nod and pretend that he agreed with anything that Pope said. They were already halfway to Florida and no one cared about his opinion.  

Sometime after that JJ fell asleep, Kiara taking the same case of blunts from his lap and folding everything up into his backpack. By the time Pope pulled the Twinkie into the horseshoe driveway of a house bigger than Tannyhill, JJ had woken up again, rubbing his eyes as he looked out the window.  

“This is the shit I was talking about.” He said.  

Sarah whipped around, hair flying against her shoulders as she glared at him, “for god sake JJ, can you have a good fucking time? Please.”  

John B made a face, pleading with his best friend to chill. All he wanted was a stress free vacation and the fact that Sarah’s friend was willing to let them stay aided his ability to relax. If only it would aid JJ’s.  

You were standing outside on the steps when the bus pulled up, engine cutting in the middle of the horseshoe. Kiara recognized you from school and Pope recognised you from running groceries for his dad. Sarah pulled the door open and jumped out, throwing her arms around your shoulders.  

“Oh my god, you have no idea how much I missed you.” Sarah said, pulling away, “I’m literally gonna kill everyone, starting with JJ.”

“That makes two of us princess.” JJ remarked, glaring at her as he climbed out of bus.  

“Hey,” Kiara called, drawing attention away from JJ and Sarah, “thanks for having us.”  

“Trust me I was just happy to tell Scarlett that her and Kelce couldn’t stay here.” You replied, looking over at JJ, “I’d much rather spend my senior week with you guys.”  

“Flattered.”  

“Hey, you’ve never had to sit around listening to Topper talk about workouts.” You replied, feeling unusually proud of yourself when JJ cracked a smile.  

“Oh come on, you can’t just do a bench press without the proper preparation,” JJ joked, imitating Topper’s ‘bro’ dialect.  

You laughed and nodded, following him to the trunk to help them unload packs. “Hey Pope, my mom said you got that scholarship you were going for?” You mentioned as you grabbed Sarah’s bag.  

“I did yeah,” he smiled, surprised that you knew or remembered anything about it. He definitely considered you better than some of the other kooks on the island but that didn’t make you friends with him. You were just someone he delivered groceries to every once in a while.  

Once the bus was unpacked you led the group inside, beginning the tour of the house. You lived on Figure Eight in the Outer Banks and you had a house as nice as or better than the Camerons’ but this house was even nicer than that. Your grandparents had old money and they had used it to retire to the Florida Keys where they really only spent the winter months.  

“There are four guest bedrooms, you can divy them up however you want to, I’m this bedroom,” you pointed to the closed door behind you at the end of the hall. “The master is off limits, it’s my grandparents and they’ll murder all of you before JJ even gets the chance if you step foot in their room.” You instructed, looking over to JJ as you spoke. He smiled.

“How’ll they know?” He asked, looking down the hall toward the double doors of the master bedroom. This house could fit four of his inside of it. He shifted his weight as he looked around the hallway, the art on the wall looked like something he would have seen on a field trip to a museum, ugly and old but a clear representation of their wealth.  

“There’s a camera in their room.”

“Kinky.”

“Ew, oh my god JJ!” You practically gagged, causing him to laugh as Sarah scrunched up her face at the thought of your grandparents using the camera for anything more than G rated. “Moving on!” You continued through the whole house until you’d looped back around, reminding them again that the beach let out right behind the patio.  

Once the tour was over you pulled Sarah away from John B, telling her that you needed to talk to her alone. And truthfully, you did. You hadn’t been lying when you told her that you had turned Kelce and Scarlett away for the week. Kelce had texted you days before Sarah and asked about ‘all of us’ getting together for senior week at your grandparents. You knew what ‘all of us’ meant. Him, Scarlett, Topper, and (despite having graduated two years earlier), Rafe. If Sarah was still hanging out with them she would’ve been there too. That was the senior week Scarlett had always planned for but there wasn’t anything you wanted less in life than spending time with all your least favorite people.  

While everyone else unpacked you led Sarah into the kitchen, “so, I told you Kelce had texted me about them doing senior week here?”

“Yeah, but they’re not...”

“No,” you shook your head, “no I told them I had a full house. But they are here.”

“What do you mean here?”

“I mean they rented a place down the street. Like we can see their house from this house. Topper texted me this morning before you guys got here.” You fished your phone out of your pocket and showed Sarah the text that Topper had sent along with the picture of you out on your deck.  

“Bit stalkerish.”

“Sarah, not the point.”

“Look, it’s fine,” she replied, trying to play off that maybe she actually believed that it was fine, “they can do their thing and we’ll do ours.”  

“Yeah, that would totally be fine. Except your brother is here too.”  

Sarah groaned, “fuck.”

“What’s the matter?”  

You and Sarah turned to find John B and JJ coming into the kitchen, the latter going straight for the fridge and pulling out one of the beers that you had bought before they came down.  You watched as he popped the cap off on the counter and took a long gulp, head tilted back. Sarah smacked your arm to get your attention and both of the boys turned to look at her too.  

“Topper told me that he’s here for senior week. Him, Scarlett, Kelce...Rafe.”

“Oh cool...cool, awesome...so, the kook fucking vacation I said I didn’t want.” JJ replied, grip tightening around the beer bottle. Sarah rolled her eyes.

“It’s fine. It’s not like we have to see them.” John B replied, trying to ease his friend’s mood. He didn’t need this argument to flare up again. JJ had only just started to relax and the last thing John B wanted was for him to be in a shitty mood all week.  

“Except we always do. It’s fucking like...what’s the word?”

“Kismet?” You asked, pulling yourself up to sit on the counter as Kiara and Pope joined the small gathering.  

“What’s kismet?” Kiara asked, shaking her head when John B offered her a beer.  

“Topper and” Sarah waved her hand as if to indicate the rest of the group, “them are here.”

“What is kismet?” JJ asked, leaning toward you.  

“It means fate or destiny.”

“Yes, that’s exactly what it is. It’s my destiny to have the shittest fucking time imaginable because we all had to agree to Sarah’s kook vacation.”

“What is that, your vocabulary word for the day? I’m sorry that I didn’t envision senior week as us sitting around together in a dumpster motel with a bunch of other pogues trying to pretend that we’re not still in the Outer Banks. How dare I fucking plan an actual good vacation that you, oh that’s right, don’t have to pay for!”

“Guys,” Pope stressed the word as he stepped between Sarah and JJ, “can we please just focus on having a good time?”

“I’d have an awesome time if I was anywhere but here!” JJ shoved passed Pope and headed out the sliding glass doors toward the beach leaving the five of you to stand in the kitchen awkwardly.  

“So...” Kiara began, looking around at the group, “so Topper is here?”

“Topper, Kelce, Scarlett-”

“She’s a bitch.” Sarah cut in.

“-and Rafe.”

“Isn’t your brother a little too old to be partying on senior week?” Pope asked, looking toward Sarah. Rafe was at least two years into college by now, there was no way he should’ve been hanging around a bunch of high school kids. “Didn’t he already have a senior week?”

“He’ll probably go on senior week with Wheezie too.” You joked, “anything to party.”

“Honestly.” Sarah agreed. She had a feeling her brother’s intention was for more than just partying. If Kelce had planned to stay with you than it was obvious why Rafe was even coming down in the first place though she wasn’t about to say anything to anyone right now. Kiara, she assumed, knew that you had broken up with Rafe over spring break but she doubted that it was common island knowledge that you had been dating him at all.  

Pope suggested that it was a good idea to leave JJ be, that he’d eventually cool down and come inside on his own, especially once he realized that he had no means to get back to North Carolina. He either came in and accepted that this was the vacation they were getting or he camped out on the beach, either way he was stuck in Florida for the week. Still, you couldn’t help feeling guilty that he was having a shitty time. When Sarah had asked if she could stay with you for the week you had stressed whether it was okay with her friends or not.  

That guilty feeling was completely, so you said, the reason for heading down the beach to find JJ. “I did ask Sarah if it was cool with you guys...coming down here. I know it’s not exactly what you had in mind.” You offered as you sat beside JJ on the beach. In another hour the sun would be completely gone from the sky, the oranges and pinks in the horizon hinting at the coming night.  

“I feel like I should be bitching to a confessional about how much I can’t stand Sarah right now.” He replied.  

“I mean, you could try it?” You teased, moving so your back was to the water and you were facing  him, “alright JJ, tell us what’s got you so upset and try to include a tragic story from your past.”

JJ cracked a smile, meeting you eyes as he put on his best reality show sob voice, “I’m just like, really pissed at Sarah and it totally reminds me of the summer my turtle died.”  

You couldn’t help the burst of laughter as you fell back into the sand. JJ joined in, sour mood getting shelved for another day. He honestly didn’t hate the view or being near a beach, or the incredibly comfortable mattress that he had in the room he had claimed for himself. He was even hesitant to complain about you. Not quite the stuck-up kook that he expected, you’d been welcoming to them since the Twinkie first pulled into your driveway.  

“If it’s Top and them you aren’t thrilled about I don’t blame you. I was definitely looking forward to a drama free week and I feel like that might have just become unattainable. But, we’ll avoid them best we can and focus on other stuff.” You said, trying to ease his upset.

“Other stuff like?”  

“Other stuff like, I got invited to a party down the beach tonight...if you wanna go?” You asked, “I mean who can be sad when they’re drunk?”

“John B...never let him talk to you when he’s drunk.” JJ replied. He stood up and offered you his hand to grab.  

“I’ll keep that in mind.” You said, texting Sarah that you were headed down to a party with JJ.  

The party wasn’t far away and groups of people had already gathered despite it still being early in the night. People who had just shifted from lounging on the beach to the beginnings of what would become a party. It was still in the transition between disjointed groups sunbathing and people getting drunk as you and JJ walked up. He was quiet as you walked through people trying to find somewhere to set yourselves up.  

You weren’t sure if Sarah would really show up with everyone or if she was so peeved with JJ’s attitude that she’d stay away for the night. You kept an eye out for any sign of Topper or anyone else in his group, hoping to avoid them for as long as possible. Maybe the whole week if you were truly lucky.  

Beach parties in the keys were not as good as the boneyard parties you were used to but it would have to do for tonight.  A little less chill and relaxed, people seemed to be forcing the good time as opposed to just letting it happen. The chill vibe that you felt like it should’ve had was non-existent but you weren’t entirely sure that wasn’t just you projecting. Maybe everyone else was already having a good time and you were trying too hard already for the sake of the boy trailing  behind you. People had coolers sitting around with different seltzers, hard lemonades, seagrams, and locos but not a plain beer in sight. JJ complained about the missing keg and you tried to make up for it by offering him a peach Jack Daniels. You took a can of something called Unicorn Swirl, bypassing other people on the beach to sit up on the lifeguard’s deck.  

“This is disgusting, by the way.” JJ mentioned as he took a drink, face screwing up at the overtly sweet taste of the peach. He downed another gulp quickly, trying to trick his brain into not realizing the taste and only getting the alcohol.  

“You’ll be hard pressed to find a keg here.”

“So what I’m hearing is, even the parties are shit?”  

“Not total shit-” you paused to take a sip of your drink, JJ laughing as you almost spit it out. “Oh my god, that’s disgusting!” You gagged at the after taste, holding the 16oz can out for JJ to take, “try it.”

“You just spit it out and you want me to try it?”

“Just...you have to experience it...I can’t even describe that taste.” You replied, taking the peach from him to wash down the taste. “It doesn’t even have a flavor.”

JJ kicked it back, tilting his head and gulping. The sugary taste of whatever flavor they intended it to be made him gag worse than you had and he leaned all the way forward, spitting most of it back out onto the sand. “Holy shit! That is the worst fucking thing I’ve ever had in my life!” He exclaimed, “it tastes like fucking medicine! Why did you make me drink that?”  

“I didn’t make you.” You insisted, taking a sip from his peach.  

“You literally held it in my face and told me I ‘had to experience it’. How is that not making me?”

“Yeah  but I told you it was gross before you drank it so you already knew that.”

“I can’t believe you brought me to a beach party with nothing to drink.” He replied, taking another, smaller sip from the can and pulling a face as he made himself swallow.  

“Why are you still drinking that?”

“Trying to get drunk enough that this whole vacation doesn’t suck.” He shrugged.  

“Hey!” You reached over and smacked his arm, “the whole thing doesn’t suck! I’m super cool, what’re you talking about!”  

“Except you brought me to this party so...not as cool as you think you are.” He took another sip and gagged again, “god I have to stop drinking this.”

“Come on,” you put your peach down and grabbed the unicorn from his hand to abandon that on the lifeguard stand as well, “I know there’s a distributor around here...lets get some real beer.”  

“Sounds good to me, anything but this.” JJ replied, following you away from the crowd of people on the beach.  

-

Taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife  @freckled-and-daydreaming  @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @howdyherron @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @tragicmisfits @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox @belledutchess @poguelifeeee @jjsthumbring @faded-blue @parkerpetertingle @thebookwormlife @summer-clouds-and-long-days @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @minigranger @louisolos @hoewkeye @love-someone-special @finecelle @vitaminekabc @tiredfeels @g4bster @strangerthanfanfiction713 @the-only-nana @tomzfrog @mozz-are-lla @vindictive-hearts @poguestyleskye @ssprayberrythings @pensysto @jenahbell @beautyandthebleh @lavenderxraindrops @gothackedalready @teenwaywardasgardian @thelonewolfdies @hvitost @haha-fuck-you-thot @stillbelieve398-5 @rewindlr @queenniccimicci @kissessforharryyy @thedarkqueenofavalon @alytavzla @bqmblebee @linniep @nerdypartytrashpsychic @xxchxrryxx @spencer-reid-is-a-cutie @mirjanak @kwjune @danielladreaming @obx-saltlife @youngestxhearts @spnobsessedmemes @jolomez @timotaychalabae @babycakes00 @wowitswondergurl @siwiecola @regev1408 @celestialmaybank​ @mybnkjj​ @averagxfangirl​ @mysterious-adventurer​ @justawilddreamerchild​ @rhyetaylor62​ @calm-rejects​ @99sxuxii​ @oh-annaa​ @katiaw2​ @aiifandomsunite​ @thatjohnd @pixelated-pogues @booksandshish @lopineapples 

[everybodyscupoftea]

to grandmother’s house we go

sigma chi jj x reader

you bring jj to your family’s christmas

ope. two days late again 

(warnings: a little bit of cursing, minor editing)

The first Christmas JJ came home with you, you felt like you should warn him. The two of you had been together for just over two years, and he was used to your immediate family, but your extended family was a different story.

“Okay,” you started when he crossed over the state line into your home state, “I feel like I should say that we aren’t going to be at my house much.”

“What?” he asked, glancing over at you out of the corner of his eye.

“Yeah, um, my family normally goes to stay out of town with my Grandma. We do one half of the family on Christmas Eve and the other half on Christmas Day.”

JJ raised his eyebrows, “Your family knows I’m coming right? Like your extended family?”

“Yeah, definitely! My mom told them.”

“And they were okay with it?” he asked, sounding cautious.

“They’re eager to meet you,” you reassured him, “I think they’re just happy to see me finally dating someone.”

He snorted, “Yikes.”

“Yeah, well, my family lives to pressure my sister and I into marriage.”

“Wait,” he looked a little panicked, “they’re not expecting us to be engaged, right?”

“No, but they might bring it up. Just ignore it.”

“I-” he cut himself off, “okay, if you say so.”

You were just glad the conversation had gone as well as it did.

-

“Three hours?” JJ hissed at you when your dad took both of your duffle bags out of the car and stuck them in your parents’ trunk.

“It’s a long drive,” you offered innocently, “but at least you don’t have to drive.”

“Nope, just get to sit in the backseat.”

“J, at least you get a window seat, I’m sitting in the middle.”

He rolled his eyes, “Yeah and you’re going to fall asleep on me no more than 45 minutes in.”

“Slander,” you protested.

Your sister walked out in time to hear him and she laughed, “He’s right.”

“You can’t talk,” you argued, “you’re worse than me.”

“Twins,” she singsonged in a high pitched voice, and you rolled your eyes.

“Brought headphones for this ride thank god.”

“I can be louder than headphones,” she spoke confidently.

JJ let you climb in first before reaching across you to give your sister a fist bump, and you sighed, “I hate that you two know each other. Y’all are the worst together.”

He squeezed your thigh, “You love us.”

“Unfortunately,” you muttered.

-

You did fall asleep, but much to your satisfaction, so did JJ. Your sister woke you up first when you pulled into your grandma’s driveway, elbowing you straight in the ribs. Jolting, you woke up JJ immediately, and his head flew up from where it was resting on top of yours, looking around wildly.

“Christ,” you muttered, glaring at your sister, “that was rude as hell.”

“I got a cute picture of you two.”

You paused, “Okay, send it to me.”

JJ blinked adorably, trying to get a grasp on his surroundings, and mumbled, “Did we make it?”

“Yeah, bud,” you told him, grabbing his hand.

He smiled softly, maybe even a little thankfully, and took a deep breath, “Okay, let’s do this.” 

“If it makes you feel better,” your sister leaned around you to talk to him, “you aren’t meeting the problematic side of our family until tomorrow.” 

JJ paused for a second to process, then nodded, “That does actually, thank you.” 

Before you could say anything else, JJ climbed out of the car, seemingly more awake, to help your dad carry in the bags and presents for his side of the family. Your dad nodded at him, a satisfied little smile on his face, “Thanks, son.” 

“You’re welcome, sir.” 

Together they carried them through the porch to where your grandma was waiting with the door open. Your sister muttered, “Kiss up,” under her breath, and you snorted. 

“He’s trying to make a good impression on grandma and pawpaw, we both know that they’re super laid back and judge more based on conversational ability, but he doesn’t.” 

She widened her eyes at you, “You didn’t tell him?” 

“I didn’t tell him we were staying here until like five hours ago.” 

“Oh my god,” she muttered, “you’re actually a disaster.” 

-

Your grandma cooked dinner, traditional Christmas dinner with the turkey and ham, macaroni and cheese, dressing, sweet potato casserole, and green beans. JJ was staring at it in confusion, arms stiffly by his side even though you knew he’d normally have an arm around your shoulder.

Leaning into his side a little, you told him, “We eat steak on the actual holiday here, that’s why it’s traditional early. You don’t have to look so scared, bud. I promise they’re super chill.” 

“What does everyone want to drink?” your grandma asked before JJ could react.

“Water,” you answered, and JJ nodded, signalling the same. 

“Guests first,” your pawpaw urged, and JJ hesitantly grabbed one of the plates in the stack to start filling it up. He was careful to not spill anything, and his grip on the plate was like steel. You reached over to pat his hand in some sort of effort to soothe him, and he relaxed the slightest bit.

Until he finished and walked over to the table where there were five spots for 10 people. You almost ran into his back, “J, what’s wrong.” 

“Where do I sit,” he hissed, clearly anxious about it.

“Find a place with a glass of water and sit there. It’s not like assigned,” you answered, secretly hoping you could steer him toward the seat you normally sat in.

You did, and he sat down, not starting to eat right off the bat until he saw you dig in. It was slow, as if he was trying to wait for everyone to sit down, but you elbowed him until he picked up the pace.

“I’m trying to be polite,” he whispered.

“Trust me, you wanna hit the dessert before my dad.” 

JJ snorted, finally relaxing a bit. Your grandma, cousin and his girlfriend, and sister sat down next and immediately started asking JJ questions about his major, his frat, his favorite hobbies, and what he wanted to do in the future.

That he’d gone through before, with your immediate family, and he had the answers on deck. He spoke confidently, and you could tell your grandma was impressed. It helped him relax, and by the time everyone moved to the living room to watch a Christmas movie before bed, he sat on the couch next to you and was even comfortable enough to put an arm around your shoulder.

When he left to get ready for bed in the one bathroom, your pawpaw finally spoke up, “He’s a good kid.” 

“He’s the best,” you agreed.

“We got him a gift,” your aunt added, “so that he has something to open on Christmas Day.” 

You teared up, knowing it would mean the world to him. JJ didn’t talk about his childhood much, especially holidays. You knew he had no interest in going home to his dad, and from what you did know, there was never much of a Christmas celebration involving gifts.

“Thank you guys so much,” you finally managed.

-

Immediately JJ went straight back into discomfort mode as soon as your family walked into your aunt’s house. Everyone was already there, and the small house felt stuffed.

You leaned close, “Party vibes, huh? Should be pretty familiar.”

He snorted, “Not even close.”

“This is the problematic side,” your sister reminded him, “they’ll definitely get in your business and you’re going to hear a ton of small town gossip.”

“ The gossip is pretty interesting,” you admitted, “but the yearly questioning isn’t the best.”

“How often do you see your family?” JJ asked.

“Christmas. And sometimes a trip during the summer.”

He hummed, and followed you and your sister deeper into the house. Your sister took over, introducing him to whoever you ran into on the way. You could hear your mom in the kitchen catching up with her sister, and your dad took his normal spot on the couch with your uncle and cousins.

JJ shook hands with your favorite cousin, who immediately started asking him questions.

“How’d you two meet?”

Glancing over at you, JJ cleared his throat, “We were in the same orientation group and became friends through that.”

He hummed, looking at the two of you skeptically before turning back to JJ, “Major?”

“Marine biology.”

“You fish?”

JJ nodded eagerly, finally in his element, “Definitely.”

“Saltwater or fresh?”

“Either, but back home mostly salt.”

Your cousin looked impressed, “Where are you from?”

“Outer Banks of North Carolina.”

“Sometime when it warms back up, you’ll have to come visit again and we’ll go fishing.”

“Looking forward to it.”

JJ relaxed, stretching back into the couch a bit while the conversation picked back up around him. Your cousins’ kids were in another room napping, and you leaned over to him, “We’re getting the gossip early while the kids sleep. Board games after lunch.”

And as you explained, your grandmother dove into the rumors she’d heard about the new pastor in town. She leaned forward and you knew it was going to be a particularly interesting take.

“And then we saw the preacher’s wife smoking a cigarette outside the movie theatre.”

Your sister dramatically gasped, “How dare she?”

You snorted, but your grandmother, used to ignoring both of you, kept on talking until she finally came back around and landed on your sister.

“Your sister has a boyfriend, when will you be bringing one for us to meet?” she asked.

“Well, whenever I can get a boy to like me, I guess.”

She looked at JJ, “Are you planning on marrying my granddaughter.”

He froze, staring at your grandmother with wide eyes, “We haven’t really, uh, talked about marriage.”

“Mhmm, yet here you are, at family Christmas.”

“Okay, grandmother,” you cut in, “he’s family, and you know family doesn’t have to be by blood or marriage. It can be friendship.”

“You love her?” your grandmother ignored you to ask.

JJ reached over and took your hand, meeting your grandmother’s eyes, “Of course.”

She nodded and backed off, seemingly satisfied with his answer. Turning back to your sister, she added, “I expect a boy to be at Christmas with you soon, young lady.”

“What if it’s a girl?” your sister asked, clearly trying to egg her on.

“I’ll take either at this point.”

Clapping your hand over your mouth, you held in a loud laugh at your sister’s indignant face, and your dad didn’t even try. JJ squeezed your hand and you looked over to see his eyes squinted, biting his lip, to hold in his laughs. 

“Just wait until I never get married,” your sister crossed her arms with a huff.

-

“I’m going to murder you,” your uncle glared at you, “you better stop looking at my sheet.”

You scoffed, “Don’t put it in my eyesight then. Hold it up.”

“Just don’t cheat!” he exclaimed.

“Not cheating, just using my resources.”

And when he didn’t respond, you started crossing out the weapons on the sheet your uncle had just accidentally let you see. Your sister cleared her throat, “Well since he threatened her, Colonel Mustard is the killer and I’d like to make an accusation.”

“We started five minutes ago,” your cousin told her, “hush.”

She lunged forward and almost elbowed JJ’s empty gumbo bowl off the table. 

“Hey,” your dad yelled, “relax.”

“No. I simply will not relax until you let me accuse.”

“Dude, you haven’t even had a turn yet,” you rolled your eyes

“I’ve been looking at mom’s card,” she admitted.

Your mom gasped, scooting away from her, “Cheater!”

“How’s it feel to raise two cheaters,” your uncle taunted your mom.

“Only at board games,” you added, looking over at JJ.

He smiled at you, clearly amused at everything unfolding. The game went on for 30 minutes before JJ eventually won it. Your sister glared at him, “Should’ve left you at Grandma’s.”

Reaching over to ruffle her hair, he teased, “Sore loser.”

“I’m keeping your gift.”

“You won’t.”

“I will. Better show some respect.”

“Respect is earned.”

Her jaw dropped and your mom snorted, “Give up now.”

Your sister, always needing the last word, “Watch out, new kid, you’re the replaceable one here.”

JJ leaned forward, elbows on the table to look into her narrowed eyes, “Until I propose.”

Cheeks heating, you stared at him in shock, and he moved back, a satisfied smile on his face.

“Damn,” your dad coughed, “got her again.”

“Okay, any present marked JJ comes to me now,” she announced, “now that we’re family.”

Before anyone else could answer, one of the kids walked in holding a box, and your cousin stood, “Time for presents.”

JJ had a few, one from your parents, two from your grandmother, and a couple your cousins chipped in on. His eyes widened when he actually had a small pile, mostly gift cards, but he was still excited.

And at the end of the night, the five of you walked out to the car to drive back to your grandma’s house. Your dad looked at JJ over his shoulder, “You made it through. How’re you doing?”

“Pretty good.”

“Well, you got yourself a standing invitation.”

JJ’s smile was small but pleased as he stared at the window. You reached down to grab his hand and he squeezed in response. Right as you got to your grandma’s house, it hit midnight, and you leaned over to kiss his cheek, “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, sweetheart.”

~

day 10 of @obxmermaid​‘s holiday challenge: visiting relatives

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Pairings: Past Aizawa/Mandalay, Pre-Bakugou/Kirishima

Word Count: 2,006 Words

Summary: The Sports Festival, part 2.

Warnings: Fighting Mention, Cursing, Fire Mention, Bullying Mention, Trauma Mention, Injury Mention, Teen Pregnancy Mention, Pregnancy Mention, Partial Nudity Mention, Death Mention, let me know if I should tag anything else.

Usernames: Existence Is A Prison   Aizawa: feral cat dad, Aoyama: gay salt, Hagakure: ranch flavored jello, Tokoyami: foil-mecha, Shinsou: farmer toshi, Kuroiro: life is a nightmare, Shiozaki: saviour, Tsunotori: schrodinger better run, Honenuki: pure, Monoma: nat20, Yamada: President Megaphone, Bakugou: deku-deck-you

Notes: Bakugou doesn't get chained down because fuck that part of the canon. The League will just go after him because he's powerful.

Aizawa, We Agreed No More Cats: Chapter 9

11:50 AM

Existence Is A Prison

gay salt: Yaoyorozu is amazing.

ranch flavored jello: She can bench press me anytime.

gay salt: To be fair, you'd let any strong lesbian bench press you.

ranch flavored jello: You're not wrong but you don't have to say it.

life is a nightmare: She did really well, I'm glad she's advancing despite that Tsubasa guy cutting her up with his glass.

deku deck-you: I think that guy might be related to one of my old friends before UA.

foil-mecha: What happened that you aren't friends anymore

deku deck-you: Tsubasa Ryuu? He got kidnapped or something during a break and I never saw him again. My other two friends? They were fake. They ditched me after the Sludge Villain incident.

nat20: I'll kick their asses for you.

deku deck-you: I wouldn't stop you from burning Aldera Middle School to the ground. For Deku's sake, mostly, but also because I hated those teachers.

feral cat dad: What happened at Aldera Middle School?

deku deck-you: Well, you probably know from Deku by now that I wasn't always easy on him or even this easy to get along with. From the time Deku was misdiagnosed as quirkless, I bullied him. Let's be honest, my reasoning wasn't important because I made his life a living hell just because mine was a living hell at home.

deku deck-you: We talked about everything the day after I moved into the dorms, so don't worry, there's no hard feelings and we're working through all the shit I did to him.

deku deck-you: But, anyway, the teachers at Aldera tried to fail Deku constantly because of his 'quirklessness' but I'd vouch his grades for him once I realized they were trying to flunk him out of the school. And, after the Sludge Villain happened, they began doing the same thing to me because they thought I was influenced by a villain even though I'd told them so many times that I was basically a hostage.

feral cat dad: Looks like I'm opening a formal complaint against Aldera Middle School after the Sports Festival.

deku deck-you: Don't, me and Deku just want to leave Aldera behind us.

feral cat dad: Fine.

feral cat dad: Oh, they had a draw while we were texting. Jeez, that was fast.

deku deck-you: Don't you dare underestimate Kirishima.

ranch flavored jello: Someone has a crush.

deku deck-you: Don't you dare speak of this. I'll launch Deku at you.

ranch flavored jello: Jeez, fine. Feral Deku scares me.

deku deck-you: Good. I gotta go.

12:20 PM

Existence Is A Prison

farmer toshi: Wow, Kats. You did great.

deku deck-you: Can't talk right now. She's in pain and won't let go of me.

deku deck-you is now offline

feral cat dad: Fuck, she overstressed herself.

farmer toshi: I want so badly to check on her but I need to fight Tokoyami now.

1:15 PM

Existence Is A Prison

farmer toshi: Katsuki, you're coming back soon, right? I mean, your match is next after Todoroki and Yaoyorozu.

deku deck-you is online

deku deck-you: I'm back, who's won?

farmer toshi: Kirishima won against Tetsutetsu in their rematch, I won against Fumi, Midoriya won against Toru, Kiyo won against Shizuka, Kaminari just won against Fujioka.

deku deck-you: Okay, good.

ranch flavored jello: I'm down by the entrance to the field. What's wrong with Yaoyorozu?

ranch flavored jello has started a video chat

[Yaoyorozu is shown fumbling around a bit in the ring and Todoroki is in a fighting stance, but drops it when she's facing the wrong way]

Yaoyorozu, why are you stumbling? -Unknown

Shut up and fight me, Todoroki! -Unknown

Something's wrong with you, I won't compete if you're hurt. -Unknown

Just fight me! -Unknown

[Yaoyorozu is shown collapsing and Midnight goes to check on her.]

Yaoyorozu cannot compete due to a previous injury, this match goes to Todoroki! -Unknown

ranch flavored jello has ended the group chat

gay salt: Mon dieu. Is she alright?

ranch flavored jello: She's muttering about her eyes.

ranch flavored jello: Oh god, there's glass in her eyes.

feral cat dad: Get up here, Toru. Now, you don't have to see that.

ranch flavored jello: I won't leave her alone without anyone she knows. I won't. She can't see, Dad.

feral cat dad: Okay, keep her company. But please be aware, they're probably going to do surgery to try to save her vision.

ranch flavored jello: It must have happened when she made that smoke bomb and Tsubasa couldn't see her.

feral cat dad: They're already having Katsuki against Kirishima to ease the tension in the stadium. Clearly, Katsuki's winning already.

2:00 PM

Existence Is A Prison

feral cat dad: Yeah, Katsuki won. So did Shinsou against Midoriya, Kiyo won against Kaminari, and Katsuki won against Todoroki.

ranch flavored jello: At least there's some good news.

deku deck-you: What good news? Icyhot wouldn't fight me with his fire and we spent like ten minutes yelling about trauma before the fucker got blown back so hard when his fire hit my explosion that he's now got a concussion.

feral cat dad: I understand you're angry, but you didn't do anything wrong, Katsuki.

deku deck-you: I know, I just feel bad. Now two of the people I've fought today are out of commission temporarily and I feel responsible.

feral cat dad: I know, and I also know they'll both forgive you. You went off with Uraraka for almost a hour and you didn't mean to injure Todoroki.

2:20 PM

Existence Is A Prison

feral cat dad: I'm so proud of all three of you.

farmer toshi: Katsuki, you're helping put my shoulder into place as a punishment for pulling it out. Recovery Girl already said it was fine.

deku deck-you: A punishment I'll accept fully for doing it in the first place. After I'm done visiting Pink Cheeks again.

deku deck-you is now offline

feral cat dad: My chaotic sons.

ranch flavored jello: Alright, I'm back. Momo can't leave the hospital tonight and she's been instructed to have Recovery Girl heal her in two days.

feral cat dad: There's my daughter. It's a good thing you kids are off for two days after today because you need time to heal after all that.

feral cat dad: Nezu's already insisted Yaoyorozu stay in the dorms because he doesn't want her too far from campus and her parents live in Tokyo prefecture and he feels it's too far for an injures student to travel.

feral cat dad: Tokage is already getting spoken to by Nezu, so she'll likely be added to this chat soon enough. Toru, can you turn on Yaoyorozu's screen reader for her so I can add her to this chat.

ranch flavored jello: Done!

feral cat dad has added Yaoyorozu

Yaoyorozu: Hello everyone!

foil-mecha: Hi, Momo!

Yaoyorozu: Hello! I'm going to take a nap, the surgery was very taxing so I'm quite tired. I'll message you all later when I wake up.

ranch flavored jello: I'll stay with her, don't worry!

Yaoyorozu is now offline

feral cat dad: You haven't changed her username yet, Hitoshi.

farmer toshi: I figure she probably doesn't know our usernames yet so I'll do it later after we tell her ours.

deku deck-you is now online

deku deck-you: Nezu's with Uraraka so I can't visit her right now.

farmer toshi: Is she okay?

deku deck-you: I don't know if I'm allowed to say. Honestly, if it were me and someone told other people I didn't know well without me knowing, I'd call it an invasion of privacy.

feral cat dad: Nezu said Uraraka should be fine. There's no need to worry about her, Recovery Girl is nothing if not adamant on the care of her patients.

deku deck-you: Alright, I'm allowed in now that she's asking for me.

deku deck-you is now offline

life is a nightmare: I wonder how badly hurt she is to want Katsuki there for comfort.

3:00 PM

Existence Is A Prison

gay salt: screenshotofurarakaslatestinstagramphoto.jpg

ochako&baby.jpg

Liked by blastyboykats and 57 others

uraravity Welcome to the world baby boy, despite being unexpected.

View all 15 comments

minabeana Oh my gosh, that baby is so cute. I love him already.

winniepie He's so cute.

kiripima Aw, welcome to the world, little guy.

sparklegirl He's cute, Ocha, mon ami!

michipeachy 🥰🥰🥰

farmer toshi: Does Uraraka have a baby sibling?

foil-mecha: Last I heard she was an only sibling.

nat20: Maybe her mom had the baby today?

feral cat dad: Alright, Uraraka is good now, not that I need to tell you since Aoyama apparently stalks people's accounts on everything.

gay salt: Hey, she gave me her account name willingly! I have all the other girl's accounts.

feral cat dad: Anyway. Tokage's also done talking to Nezu. Here's the girls of the hour.

feral cat dad has added Uraraka and Tokage

Uraraka: Hi, guys.

gay salt: Ocha, are you okay?

Uraraka: Oh yeah, Nezu said me and my baby can stay at the dorms.

gay salt: Quoi? Your baby?

Uraraka: Yeah, didn't Katsuki or Aizawa tell you all? That's why I'm moving into the dorms. I went after my match in the Sports Festival with Katsuki and they had to end up doing an emergency C-Section because they weren't finding a heartbeat. Thankfully, my idiot daughter is fine, just chaotic.

gay salt: What's her name?

Uraraka: Uraraka Emiyo.

gay salt: I will spoil her.

foil-mecha: How cute is she?

Uraraka: katsukicryingholdingemiyo.jpg

foil-mecha: Truly a glorious child. I assure you, us 1a students will assist you in your raising of dear Emiyo as best we can.

ranch flavored jello: I'm not good with baby-babies but I'll try.

Yaoyorozu is now online

Yaoyorozu: I'll help as well, once I'm able to.

Uraraka: It's okay if you don't want to, Momo.

Yaoyorozu: I don't believe you were there for it but, in the second rounds, I had to forfeit the match to Todoroki because, in the first round, Tsubasa Yuudai accidentally got glass in my eyes. My win in the first round was a fluke and I was running only off instinct when I got him out of bounds but, since taking the glass out can't fix the amount of nerve damage, I'll likely be blind for the foreseeable future.

Uraraka: Oh gods, Momo, I'd come give you a hug but I can't move around much yet.

Yaoyorozu: It's fine, Uraraka. It was an accident after all, he didn't mean to do that but the smoke bomb I made obscured his vision.

life is a nightmare: If either of you need anything, just text us, someone will get it to you.

Yaoyorozu: Thank you, but I have Toru for now!

Uraraka: Thanks. I'm good, I've got a Katsuki.

nat20: You say that like you've roped him in or something.

Uraraka: Well he's been proclaiming that he's Emiyo's uncle for the whole thirty minutes she's been in this world.

schrodinger better run: To be fair, is he not her uncle by now?

Uraraka: He is. He's the first besides my parents and me to hold her. He's definitely her uncle.

pure: Has he even put her down yet?

Uraraka: katsukiasleepwithemmiyoinhisarms.jpg

Uraraka: No, he hasn't. My mom's about to pick her up though. She's worried she'll fall and I have to feed her and all so he'll be temporarily losing holding rights anyway since I have to make him leave to feed her.

gay salt: He's sleeping, Ocha. Plus, I thought you knew he was 💅

Uraraka: He's gay?

gay salt: No, he's trans, Ocha, us girls had a whole meeting on including our ftm classmates on girl days if they're comfortable with it and you forgot?

Uraraka: Oh yeah, in that case I'm whipping out the titty so my mom can show my how to feed a baby.

Uraraka is now offline

feral cat dad: You kids are going to give me a heart attack one day and I'll put all your names on my tombstone as a reason I died.

@everythingisstardust 

[wiypt-writes]

Riding On

Ch3: What Happens in Vegas...

Summary: We catch up with what Fliss got up to whilst Frank was living it up in Vegas, before they both face up to the events of the weekend, because this time what happened in Vegas certainly doesn’t stay there…

Warnings: Bad Language words.

Pairing: Frank Adler x Fliss Gallagher

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Fliss Gallagher and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Riding On Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Chapter 2

Just when it seems like everything’s evened out, and the balance seems serene, see the fool I’ll be, still running ‘round on the flesh rampage.

“Hey!” Fliss greeted Bonnie as she walked over to where the woman was supervising the after school club.

“Hiya!” Bonnie smiled “You heard from Frank today?”

“Yeah, before.” Fliss smiled, before she looked and Bonnie “I gotta say, that video of Simon…”

“He’s an idiot.” Bonnie shook her head “Punching his own reflection…I mean…”

“I’m not gonna lie, it’s probably the funniest thing I’ve seen in ages.” Fliss giggled and Bonnie snorted, shaking her head again. At that point Mary came running over, her cheeks pink

“Hey Lissy.” “Hey sweetheart, you ready to go?”

“Yeah.”

“Good, because I got a surprise for you!”

“Me?”

“Yup!”

“Where is it?”

“We gotta go pick it up.”

“Oh, ok…bye Miss Stevenson!”

“See you Mary!” Bonnie smiled as she started to head off to Fliss’ car “Hey, give me a call…we can do lunch Sunday before the boys get back.”

“Sure.” Fliss nodded. “I’ll text you.”

With a final goodbye she headed after Mary and climbed into the driver’s side.

“Where’s Thor?” Mary asked.

“He’s at Mum and Dad’s with Rupert and Fred.” she said, “I thought after our surprise we could stay there for the weekend, use the pool and the Cinema Room…”

“Ok…” Mary looked at her suspiciously.

“I promise you’re gonna like it!”

“Just tell me.” Mary looked at her as Fliss set off driving.

“Sure you wanna know?”

“You’re as bad as Frank.” The girl rolled her eyes and Fliss laughed.

“We’re going to pick Steve up from the airport.”

Mary’s face split into a huge grin, it was a well-known fact that besides Bill, Fliss’ brother was basically her favourite person that wasn’t Frank on the planet.

“Uncle Steeby is coming to stay?” she looked at Fliss.

“Yup for a whole month. He has some work in Orlando and Tampa so he’s gonna be staying in town for a while, and then in Easter Sian and the twins are flying over.”

“Oh man!” Mary grinned, laying her head back on the seat “This is great!”

Mary’s excitement seemed to increase the nearer they got to the Airport, and Fliss had to practically hold her down in the seat as she parked the car, telling her to wait a second. Once she’d managed to park they headed into the arrivals lounge and little after 15 minutes later her brother appeared, towing his suitcase behind him.

“Hey Stack!” he grinned as Mary flung herself at him and he swept her up in a hug “How’s it hanging?” “Same old, same old!” she grinned and he let out a laugh before he placed her down and turned to Fliss.

“Oh my God!” he smiled as Fliss walked over to him “Look at you!”

She laughed “I know…” with a nod she looked down “Nothing until 16 weeks and then wham…now I feel like it’s getting bigger every day.”

He pulled her into his arms and gave her the usual bear hug before the three of them headed out to the car. On the way back to the house, Steve filled Fliss in on what exactly he was doing. The construction company he owned was in the running for a very big job in Orlando building a complete village of holiday villas not far from Lake Buena Vista. As such he was out here to meet a few people and attend the Bidders Conference, whilst also taking a look at some potential office buildings in Lakeland.

“If we win this tender Fliss, it’s going to be huge.” he smiled at her “We’re talking millions.”

“That’s great.” she smiled “You’ve really blown it up since Dad handed over the reins, I’m really pleased for you!”

“I got lucky.”

“No, it was hard work.” Fliss glanced at him.

“Frank says you make your own luck.” Mary added.

“See!” Fliss grinned at her brother. “So, would you guys move out here or…”

“I’m tempted.” he said, “As with anything, I’ll need a project team who can oversee the local suppliers and labour that type of thing, manage the schedules and what not…but our head offices will still be in Liverpool, so I’m undecided. Either way I’ll be spending a lot more time here, certainly in the first 12 months whilst it all gets up and running.”

“How does Sian feel about it?”

“She’s excited. She knows what it means to me, to the business. Obviously she realises it means more time apart as I’ll be out here quite often but…”

“Is it selfish of me to be happy about that?” Fliss smiled and Steve laughed.

“Nope, because we all know I’m the best big brother in the world.”

Fliss grinned and shook her head as Mary began to enthusiastically talk to Steve about school and University and the Girl Scout group she was in. Fliss interjected whenever she needed to but other than that she was happy to let the two of them chat away.

Once home Steve headed over to the Annex where he would be staying whilst Mary went outside to play with the dogs, Fred happy to oversee things from his spot on a chair on the large decking platform which-over looked the pool area. Steve appeared an hour or so later having showered and changed into a pair of shorts and a T-shirt, Fliss grinning at him, calling him a tourist. Whilst it wasn’t cold by cold standards, she found it chillier having grown used to the blazing heat of the summer. Steve, who had come from the chilly early spring in England, simply rolled his eyes and handed her the box he had in his hand.

“It’s a present from me and Sian.” he smiled.

Fliss glanced down and smiled at the selection box of Pukka Tea bags.

“Steeby this is great!” she beamed “I’ve been struggling to find them out here since Sian recommended them.”

She gently opened the box and glanced at the various herbal teas. There were 12 different flavours such as Peppermint and Liquorice, Ginger and Manuka Honey, Chamomile and Rose to name but a few. There was even a handwritten note inside from Sian, explaining which ones had helped her with various symptoms she felt during her pregnancy. She closed the purple and gold box and looked up at Steve, tears in her eyes.

“Hey, come on Titch!” he laughed as she fell into his arms, chuckling herself at her ridiculous tears “It’s just tea bags.” “It’s really thoughtful, thank you.” she stepped back, wiping her eyes “Fucking hormones.” Steve chuckled, rubbing her back slightly before she turned and began pulling the rest of the stuff out for dinner.

“Wanna help?” she asked.

“You really want me to?” He smirked “I’ve still not forgot the time we made brownies and set fire to the curtains at the Farm house.” “Ok, first off those curtains were rank, as Mum said when Dad came home and hit the roof, second off, they were pot brownies and we were already stoned after smoking a load! Cooking and being high do not mix.”

Steve laughed “God, poor Mum didn’t know what to do. Came home, found us both on the floor eating them, with burnt curtains hanging at the window.” “She knew we were stoned, she told me.” Fliss grinned, handing Steve a knife “Said she lied to dad that it had been her to get us off the hook.” “Well that didn’t work because Dad told me he knew full well it was us. He made me pay for the new curtains and told me that if I ever let you smoke that stuff again he was going to beat me within an inch of my life.” Fliss laughed “He was so full of shit, he never raised a hand to either of us. Never would either.” “No, but the threat was there. Even if I was 22 at the time, scared the shit out of me.”

“Thankfully we both grew up since then, huh?” Fliss shrugged, as she grabbed a chopping board to start carving up the meat for the tacos.

“Hmmm, debatable.” Steve nudged her. “Although I can safely say I haven’t done weed since the twins were born…as tempting as it was at times.”

“I can’t remember the last time I did.” Fliss mused “Was certainly before I moved to Boston.” “Frankie boy not dabble every now and then?”

“Nope.” Fliss said “He doesn’t smoke and says the last time he did pot it made him pull a whitey so he steers clear. Hardest thing he does now is Bourbon.” “Huh…” Steve mused “I had him pegged as a bit of wild one…” “He’s not.” Fliss shook her head “I mean he cuts loose when we go out, and I dread to think about the states he’s gonna be in this weekend but…” she shrugged “He’s well adjusted, sensible, level headed…can be a bit of a child at times but, show me a man who isn’t?” Steve shot her a look and she chuckled.

“So, how is he?” Steve asked. “Seems like ages since I spoke to him.” “He’s good.” Fliss smiled “His work is going well. He’s really excited about the baby.” her hand dropped to her bump. “We’re gonna start looking for houses now our landlord had said he won’t hold us to our contract. Frankie wants to move as soon as we can so he can get a nursery ready but I’m not bothered. Not like we’ll need the extra space really until a few months after it’s born.”

“You’d be surprised.” Steve raised an eyebrow “Babies accumulate a lot of stuff…” “Well, we’ll manage either way.” Fliss shrugged “Most important thing is they’re safe and happy. We can figure the rest out as we go.” “You gonna buy or…” “Hopefully.” Fliss nodded “With work and stuff now we shouldn’t have a problem borrowing now but, I don’t know, we’re going to look into it properly once Jake’s wedding is out of the way in a few weeks.”

Steve nodded and took a deep breath “You know, I wasn’t sure about you two at first, not because I didn’t like Frank, I did, I mean I do but, well, I just thought after Dickhead that you needed time to heal and find yourself again.” Fliss looked at him as he chewed the inside of his lip before he turned to her. “But then when I saw you again after your first Christmas together and then over the Easter…I dunno, you just…”

Fliss smiled and looked down, shrugging “I might have healed in a lot of ways before I met Frank but I was still broken Steeb. Finding my way in a new relationship was hard work, it was daunting…I constantly found myself automatically doing things I did with or for John…like you know the first time Frank ever stayed over, in the morning I just got up and was about to make him coffee and he was so puzzled by it.” she shrugged “that could have been so awkward but Frank…well, he didn’t let it feel that way. Simply told me to stay the fuck in bed.” “Don’t wanna know.” Steve pulled a face and Fliss laughed.

“Joking aside, I know it used to bother him because it was almost like on a subconscious level I was comparing the two of them but he never once lost his temper, not really anyway, other than to tell me to stop putting him on a pedestal for being fucking normal…his words, not mine.” she said, framing them in quotation marks with her fingers. “He just gets it. He gets me.” “You finished with the sales pitch?” Steve asked her and she narrowed her eyes at him as he laughed “You don’t need to convince me Titch, I like the guy, I just wasn’t sure you were in the right place but it's obvious he helped you get there.” Fliss smiled.

“And Mum and Dad worship the ground he walks on.” Steve shrugged “Like seriously…”

“Awww you jealous?” Fliss teased and Steve turned, pointing the small knife he was holding at her.

“Behave.” he smirked and Fliss laughed.

“I know what you mean though…whenever we argue they’re both like ‘you need to stop being so hard on him, Lissy’.” She snorted.

“Well, to be fair, you are a little bit…” Steve shrugged “Oh, I dunno, a bit of a pain in the ass at times.” “Fuck you.” she sniggered, as Steve chuckled and once again looked down at her.

“I’m glad you found him. You deserve to be happy.” Fliss smiled, and let her brother give her another hug before she instructed him to get on with his allocated job of dicing onions if they wanted any chance of eating this side of summer. Between the two of them, they had dinner ready in half an hour and the three of them ate inside at the large kitchen table. It wasn’t long after they finished that Frank Face timed. After a conversation with Mary, instructing her once more to behave, she handed the phone to Fliss who smiled at her man and excused herself for a little while so she could go talk to him in private. He told her they were off to play poker, promised he wouldn’t gamble Bean and Mary’s inheritance away, before he apologetically said he needed to go and promised he would message her later, despite her insistence that he didn’t need to keep checking in.

The siblings and Mary, plus animals migrated to the lounge of the villa as Steve yawned, desperately trying to keep himself awake as long as possible to counteract the time difference between Florida and their home in the North West of England. He ended up helping himself to a healthy shot of Bill’s 12 year old Single Malt as Fliss had an apple juice mixed with lemonade, the 2 of them on the couch, the foot stools of the recliners in front of them whilst Mary led on the rug, playing on her computer.

At one point she let out a snigger, and Fliss looked at her suspiciously.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Frank before told me to stop doing maths and do something else…so I’m googling.” she shrugged.

“Googling what?”

“Random pregnancy facts…did you know the longest pregnancy ever recorded was 375 days?”

“What?” Fliss spluttered “That’s over a year!”

Mary grinned “and the shortest was 21 weeks and four days…both babies survived.”

Steve looked at Fliss, chuckling to himself as he took a drink of his scotch.

“Woah, your heart grows bigger too…” Mary said, “and your blood volume increases by 40-50%. That’s pretty cool.”

“No wonder you get fat…” Steve mused and Fliss picked up a cushion, hitting him in the face with it.

“And your voice can change!” Mary looked up at Fliss “Says here that it can get lower…” she studied her for a second before she nodded “Talk to me…” “What do you want me to say?” Fliss asked, dropping her voice deliberately and Mary shook her head, rolling her eyes.

“You’re doing a Frank…” she sing songed.

“Doing a Frank?” Steve looked at his sister.

“Code for being an idiot.” Fliss smiled.

“You’re 18 weeks right?” Mary continued.

“Yeah”

“It says here that’s the time the baby can hear sounds…but it gets more responsive at 25-26 weeks…” she paused “Have you felt Bean move yet?”

“No.” Fliss shook her head, “but apparently for your first baby it’s not uncommon for you not to feel it until after 20 weeks.”

“Huh, they call it quickening…” Mary mused then she grinned “I can’t wait to feel it kicking you.”

“Gee thanks Stack…” Fliss looked at her as Steve let out a loud laugh

“I bloody love this kid!” he grinned and Mary smiled back.

*****

Saturday flew by. Fliss had lessons all day at the yard, Mary hanging around to help Joanne with various tasks before she herself got to ride Monty. She was now fully walking, trotting and cantering off the line competently, so when she asked Fliss if they could try a little jump, seeing as Frank wasn’t there to shit himself Fliss agreed.

Joanna set the cross poles up, leaving the jump at less than half a foot high, but it was enough for what they wanted to do.

“Ok…so…” Fliss said, nudging the ground pole with her foot. “We’re going to just trot him at this for the time being, so when he steps over this pole you have a count of one before he is going to take off. So you need to stand up… and fold forward slightly, giving him the reins. Show me.” Mary obediently stood up, and Fliss moved to help her adjust her legs so they didn’t fling too far back.

“Ok, good…” Fliss nodded. “Joanna’s gonna lead you over the first few times ok, and if you feel like you’re losing your balance then grab hold of this bit at the bottom of his mane. It won’t hurt him, I promise.” “OK, I’m ready…” Mary nodded.

“Alright…” Fliss said, stepping back. Joanna led Monty away, before they picked up trot and ran at the small jump.

“Get ready to fold!” Fliss instructed Mary, as she approached the pole. Doing exactly as she was told Mary leaned forward as Monty took off from the ground and landed perfectly after the jump. Mary sat back up and looked over her shoulder at the jump then to Fliss who gave her the thumbs up.

“Woah, did you see that?” Mary grinned, and Fliss nodded.

“Sure did!” she laughed. “Go again?”

Mary nodded eagerly and Joanna laughed. “Well done kiddo!”

They repeated this 5 or 6 times more before Fliss asked Mary if she wanted to try on her own. Never one to back down she nodded so Joanne unclipped the line and Mary trotted Monty around in a circle before she came at the jump.

“Ok, sit up and look straight between his ears at where you’re going.” Fliss said “Don’t look down…” Mary approached the jump and Fliss held her breath, but needn’t have bothered. Monty, ever the pro took Mary over the poles easily and stopped a few strides at the other side, Mary letting out an excited yell.

“I did it!”

Fliss gave her a huge smile.

“Can we film it and send it to Frank?”

“Damned straight we can!” Fliss grinned, “Do it again.”

She pulled her phone out, filmed Mary once again jumping and then turned her phone off, slipping into her pocket as Mary rode Monty back over.

“That was amazing!” the little girl was beaming ear to ear.

Fliss nodded “Yeah, it was. You did really well Stack. You wanna walk him off now then and we can feed and go home?” Mary nodded as she turned Monty away to let him walk around the outside of the paddock. With a smile she grabbed her phone and sent the footage to Frank. He replied a few minutes later with a load of wide mouthed emojis accompanied by the words “Jesus Christ, what did I say about keeping all 4 legs on the ground?”

“Oh hush Sailor!” she replied “She loved it. Now don’t forget I want a photo of you and Greg in those suits before you go out.” “Yes ma’am…now by my watch it must be nearly 6pm there. Take Mary and Bean home and get some rest.”

Rolling her eyes she responded about him being bossy to which he replied he was entitled to be as she was carrying his kid. A few more jokey messages were shared before Fliss promised to go home and Frank said he would talk to her later.

They grabbed a pizza on the way back and once more joined Steve for dinner, the 3 of them sitting in Bill’s large cinema room later watching Avengers-Age of Ultron. Before it had finished Fliss fell asleep, to be woken by Steve at the end of the film, Mary laughing at her as she groaned and stretched out.

“Sorry!” she grinned and Steve snorted.

“She falls asleep all the time.” Mary laughed “Frank said the baby is like a parasite, sucking all her energy.”

“A parasite?” Fliss snorted indignantly, her hand falling to her bump “You hear that Bean, that’s your dad saying that. Rude…”

“He isn’t wrong though.” Steve laughed. “Sian used to refer to our two as the bloodsuckers.” Shaking her head Fliss stood up and looked at Mary, “Bed, come on. You’re out with Roberta tomorrow.” “Anywhere nice?” Steve asked Mary.

“Just to the beach.” came the reply. “I haven’t seen her in a while so we’re gonna go watch the surfing competition. Roberta likes the shorts the men wear.”

“Sure she does.” Steve smirked, laughing.

“Some of them are brighter than Frank’s shirts.” Mary mused, causing Steve to laugh harder.

They bid him goodnight, getting ready for bed before Fliss tucked Mary in and went to the spare room. She fell asleep not long after but was woken early Sunday morning with a desperate need to pee. Once sorted she text her phone to find a very drunk text from Frank, declaring he loved her and couldn’t wait for Bean to arrive and for them to get married. She shook her head, glancing at the time, it was almost 4 am meaning it was 1am in Vegas. Smiling as she replied half asleep herself, telling him to maybe think about drinking water instead of any more alcohol, she turned over and closed her eyes.

***** Frank sat dumbfounded, his entire body rigid as the person next to him in the bed let out a sigh, and then a deep groan before a head emerged from under the covers.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” Frank exhaled and let out a groan as Simon looked at him “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“Well, technically this is my room, jerk.” Simon said, blinking “What year is it?

“You scared the shit out of me.” Frank took a deep breath “I thought…”

“You thought you left with the blonde?” Simon peeked up at him “Nah, man. Mind you, wasn’t for her lack of trying. She was all over you. Eventually you told her to fuck off. You were quite rude actually.” Frank let out a sigh, his head falling back against the head board.

Simon sighed turning over, before he peered under the covers. “For the love of- Frank you’re naked.” “I’m aware of that.” Frank groaned.

“Fucking hell…” Simon grimaced, before he rolled out of bed “I’m going for a pee. Put some clothes on.”

Once Simon was in the bathroom he climbed out of bed, his head still spinning as he found his clothes in a pile on the floor. Shoving on his boxers and shirt he looked around the room to see an empty bottle of Jack Daniels and a pizza box on the table.

“Where the hell did we go?” He asked Simon as he walked back into the room. “Don’t ask me.” Simon looked at him, falling face down on the bed. “I know we took Greg back to your room…”

“We did?”

“Yeah he was wasted.” Simon nodded, rolling over as Frank flopped back on the bed. “He could hardly walk so the bouncers asked us to take him out of the club. We threw him in your room then…we must have gone back out…hang on…”

With a herculean effort, Simon pushed himself up and found his phone. After a brief scan his eyes widened and he snorted.

“Look.”

He turned the phone round to Frank, who saw a selfie of him and Simon in front of a face down Greg in the hotel room. Simon then began to flick through.

“Oh, ok so we went to a liquor store…” he turned the phone round to show Frank a blurry photo of a shop front “Don’t ask me why I took that and oh my god!”

“What?” Simon pressed play and a load of cheering and singing hit their ears as they watched footage of a small man dressed as a leprechaun dancing in the hotel foyer, Frank on his knees in front of him, laughing.

“I literally have no memory of that…at all.” Frank shook his head.

“Looks like we called Bonnie as well…” Simon snorted “If this angry text message that I got at 3 am is anything to go by.”

“Oh fuck.” Frank hastily reached for his phone, which really didn’t have a lot of battery left, and he hastily scanned his calls. There were none to Fliss, but he had sent her a message. According to her reply she’d been up to use the toilet, so that was ok.

His phone illuminated then with two messages. One from Fliss asking him if he was hungover, as he deserved to be, and another from Greg asking him where the fuck he was. Deciding to reply to Greg first, as he could picture the man stressing he tapped out a quick reply informing him not to worry, he’d be back at the room as soon as he’d managed to dress himself, which at the moment thanks to his head was proving a little difficult, before he replied to Fliss saying he was indeed hungover and he needed to crawl into a hole and die and as ever, reminded her he loved her.

No sooner had he sent it, she was calling him.

“That was quick…” he mumbled, before answering it. “Hey, honey…” “So, wanna tell me exactly where and what you were doing that requires you to get dressed before you go back to your room?” Her voice was steely.

Shit. He had sent the messages to the wrong people.

“Lissy, it’s not what you think.” He instantly began.

“Oh, you have no IDEA what I’m thinking!” her voice grew louder

“No, listen…I’m with Simon.” He chuckled.

“You think this is funny?” She sniffed and Frank grimaced.

“Baby, stop.” He sighed “Look, we ended up back at his room and I passed out here. That message was meant for Greg as he was asking me where I was. Instead he now has a message saying I’m hungover to fuck and that I love him.”

She was silent and he could hear her on the other end of the line rustling something before she spoke again in a quiet voice “So you weren’t with anyone else?”

“No, Sweetheart I wasn’t. Why would I want to be huh? Most beautiful girl in the world waiting for me at home.” At that Simon let out a retching noise “God you make me want to puke, Adler.” “Oh fuck off Si you dick.” He shot back.

“Hey, Fliss.” Simon leaned over to speak down the phone, grabbing Frank’s wrist to stop him moving it. “Now you, Bonnie and me have all seen Frank nekkid...”

“I swear to God I’m gonna punch you in a minute.” Frank mumbled, jerking his arm out of Simon’s reach and pushing him so hard he rolled over and fell off the side of the bed. Frank let out a laugh as Simon groaned and a hand appeared in the air, flipping him off.

“He knows about you and Bonnie?”

“Apparently so.” Frank mused

“So anything else you wanna tell me about what you got up to? Other than naked spooning Si?”

Frank laughed “We found a dancing leprechaun.”

“A dancing leprechaun?” “Yeah, in the hotel somewhere.”

“Standard.” she giggled “So, are you ready to come home now you’ve spent the last few days acting like overgrown frat boys?

“Yes, I’m more than ready to leave Aldrich Whitaker behind”

“Who the fuck is that?”

“My alter ego for last night. He’s a trust fund ass hole.” Frank grinned.

There was a pause before she replied, snorting “Whatever.”

At that point his phone gave him a bleep to tell him he was dangerously low on battery power. “Look, baby, my phones gonna die. I’ll call you when I get it charged ok?”

“Yeah, sure, hey Frankie, I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions.” She apologised softly.

“It’s okay, I’m not surprised after that message.”

“Yeah but still…” she paused “Can I blame the hormones?”

“If you want.”

“In that case it was totally them.”

He chucked “ Hormones or not, I love you.”

“Love you too sailor”

With that his phone cut off and he glanced down at it, the screen blank as the power had gone. He dropped it on the bed, before leaning back again, his hand against his forehead.

“I’m NEVER coming to Vegas again”

“Oh you not fancy it for your Batchelor party then? Simon teased as he threw Frank a bottle of water from the mini bar.”

“The fuck I do.” Frank shook his head.

*****

“I’d like to say I’m surprised but…” Bonnie shrugged as Fliss snorted, taking a drink of her apple juice from the carton as they walked back to their cars in the setting sun. They’d had dinner at one of the beach bars and stayed simply chatting for half an hour or so, but now Fliss was now ready to head home, shower and bunker down for the rest of the evening until Frank came home.

“I knew he’d end up paralytic.” Fliss said, watching as Mary wandered back towards them, huge ice cream in her hand. “Stack that’s bigger than your head.”

Mary shrugged, handing Fliss her change “It’s good though.” “Mint choc chip?”

“Yup.” she grinned, taking a huge lick. “When’s Frank back?”

“He lands into Tampa in about 4 hours.” Fliss looked at her “Why, you fed up of me already?”

“No, just thinking how peaceful it’s been without him annoying me.”

Fliss grinned and Bonnie gave a chuckle.

“Hey, did you tell Bonnie about you jumping Monty?” Fliss asked.

“Oh, no…” Mary turned to the woman, enthusiastically telling her all about it as Bonnie listened, Fliss walking alongside them, her hand rubbing her bump. She was just thinking about how nice a nap would be right then when Bonnie’s phone went.

“Sorry Mary.” She muttered, frowning at the number. “Hey, Lisa?” Fliss attention turned to Bonnie and she watched carefully as she spoke to Jake’s fiancé, her eyes flicked to her “No, no why…what’s…oh, ok…yeah…”

She cancelled the phone call and instantly tapped at the screen.

“Everything ok?” Fliss frowned.

“Yeah, I just need to check something.” she said. Fliss glanced at Mary who looked at her, shrugging.

“Here…” Fliss handed her the keys to the jeep “Go open the car…” “You know if you want me out of the way just ask.” Mary rolled her eyes.

“Ok I want you out of the way.” Fliss looked down at her. Mary snorted and took the keys, wandering off the 50 yards or so to the jeep. Fliss watched her climb in the back, the door staying open and her legs dangling out of the side. “Bonnie what is it?”

“Nothing…” Bonnie said, far too quickly as she looked up at Fliss. Fliss frowned.

“Bonnie…”

“Honestly, it’s nothing, just something Lisa told me about on facebook so…” Bonnie stuttered slightly so Fliss narrowed her eyes.

“Stop bullshitting.” Fliss said, holding her gaze “What the fuck’s going on?”

“Look, I’m sure it’s not what it seems…” Bonnie sighed, holding out her phone. At those words Fliss felt her heart sink as it could only mean one thing, and she took the phone with a tentative hand. She looked down at it and could see that it was a photo and from the logo in the bottom right hand corner it was from the official club page that the boys had been in on Saturday night.

It showed Jake, Greg, Simon, and a few others that Fliss didn’t recognise but that wasn’t what Bonnie had been referring to. What she had been talking about, as Fliss could clearly see was the background of the shot, which showed Frank with a blonde woman. Her arms were round his neck, his hand was resting on her lower back and their faces inches apart.

“Like I said, I’m sure there’s an innocent explanation…” Bonnie said, but Fliss wasn’t listening. She was busy flicking through the other photos and then she came across another of Frank, the same girl perched on his knee.

She felt sick.

“Sure, perfectly innocent…” Fliss swallowed, handing the phone back to Bonnie, her voice sounding detached. Bonnie looked down at the snap now displayed on the screen and she took a deep breath.

“Look, Fliss, Frank loves you…he was probably just drunk and…” “Touching up some whore that’s sat on his lap.” Fliss shook her head “Save it Bonnie, I gotta go.” “Fliss…”

Fliss turned away from her, the tears stinging her eyes as she headed to the jeep. Taking a deep breath she wiped her eyes, climbing into the driver’s seat.

“Are you ok?” Mary looked at her.

“Yeah, fine…just tired and hormonal.” Fliss shot her a smile.

“We can watch a film when we get back.” Mary suggested “Just chill out?”

“Yeah, yeah we can.” Fliss trying to quell the sick feeling in her stomach that had nothing to do with Bean.

Had Frank really cheated on her? She would never in a million years thought he had it in him to be unfaithful, and she was desperate to believe Bonnie, that there was some perfectly innocent explanation for it all. And maybe, just maybe with the first one she could. It could have been taken at a bad moment, when they were just talking to one another, Frank being friendly…but then again why would they have their arms round one another. And as for the second one…the same girl was sat on his fucking lap with her arm looped round his shoulder.

And he looked perfectly comfortable with it. 

She rubbed her bump again and Mary looked at her. “Are you sure you’re ok?”

“Yeah, I’m fine sweetheart.” she nodded, painting a smile on her face before turning the key in the ignition. “Let’s go home.”

******

Frank sighed as they all trudged through the arrivals lounge, rubbing his eyes. He was ready for a shower and collapse next to his girl, he felt like he had aged a decade over the last 3 days. The rest of them looked just as bad as they headed to the waiting car, Simon’s phone reminding Frank he needed to turn his on to.

“Oh, shit…” he heard Simon groan “No, that’s not…he didn’t…I swear…”

He glanced at Frank who stood still, watching and leaning on the door frame, his own phone in his hand as it started up.

“Yeah, ok…love you…see you soon.” Simon swallowed and cut the call looking at Frank.

“What is it?” Frank looked at him, a cold feeling washing over him “Has something happened to Lissy or Mary? Or the baby, please tell me no…” “No, nothing like that but you need to call Fliss.” he said, “Frank, there’s photos of you and that blonde chick on the club facebook page. Someone tagged me and Greg in them, Lisa saw them and Bonnie and…” “Photos of what?” Frank frowned “I didn’t do anything…” “There’s a photo that makes it look like you are…and one of her on your lap.” Simon said and Frank swallowed, his stomach churning.

“Oh fahk!”

“Just get in the car.” Greg looked at him from where he stood at the other side. “Call her on the way, we’ll back you up…it’s a misunderstanding.”

“Yeah, it’ll be fine.” Jake assured him.

But it wasn’t fine, because no matter how much Frank tried, or how many messages he sent, Liss wasn’t picking up or replying and when he saw the photos, he could understand her being pissed. He would be if it was the other way round because they looked bad. The drive home seemed to take forever, and when the car finally rounded the corner onto Frank’s road they all offered to come in as well and help him explain, but he shook his head, knowing full well if he did that she would feel backed into a corner. No, this was his own dumbass fault. He’d face up to it and talk to her, make her understand how he’d told the girl to back off…she’d listen, she was reasonable.

The house was quiet when he entered and he walked through to the lounge where Fliss was sat on the sofa, her knees bent up beside her. She glanced over the back of the couch and he could see she had been crying, which made him feel like even more of bastard than he did already.

“Lissy, honey, I swear…” “You know, when I asked if there was anything you wanted to tell me, maybe I should have asked if there was something you should tell me” She sniffed, uncurling her legs and standing up and Thor’s ears pricked up from where he had been laying on the rug.

“Listen, those photos, they’re not…” He shook his head. “I told her to get lost, honestly I swear to you.”

He moved towards her, his hands dropping to her hips but she pushed him hard in the chest, stepping back.

“Don’t touch me. I don’t want you anywhere near me.”

“Sweetheart, I swear to God…”

“I don’t wanna hear it Frank.” she shook her head, walking past him. “Where are you going?” he asked, “Lissy, you can’t leave. Please, sweetheart…” “I’m going to bed, but let’s get one thing straight. The only reason I’m not screaming at you right now and storming out, slamming the door behind me is because of Mary.” she spoke calmly, too calmly for the anger which was radiating out of every inch of her body. She looked at Frank, her eyes watering as she shook her head, turning away. “You can take the couch.”

“Lissy…” “Frank…just stop.” Her voice cracked, and with that she left the room, Thor trotting behind, the bedroom door clicking behind her.

Frank stood, rooted to the spot, debating whether or not to follow her, before he decided not to. The last thing he wanted was to anger her that much she stormed out, or worse, she got so stressed something happened to the baby. No, she’d set the boundaries so he decided to respect them, and turned instead to the couch, sinking down onto the cushions his head in his hands.

She was angry, upset and she had the right to be and like he had said in the car, in her position he knew he would feel the same. She needed to sleep, calm down enough so that they could talk and he could explain, get her to listen to him. And then she’d see that it was a huge misunderstanding, even if she remained pissed at him for having the girl so close in the first place, which, ok, he shouldn’t have done but fuck…the thought of cheating hadn’t entered his mind, not once.

He swung his legs up, rubbing his face over his hands. She’d believe him. She had to, because if she didn’t, then had no idea what the fuck he was gonna do.

**** Chapter 4

[shleepys]

AYYYY I hope you all were safe over the holidays and continue to stay safe over these next few months! Right now my state is dealing with record high covid numbers and a bunch of snow, might be different for you guys but hey, even though we're kicking off the start of a new year we still have to be aware of what's been going on and continue to push through it. But yeah!

We can finally reveal for the @harringroveholidayexchange, so I hope you enjoy what I made for the amazing @catharrington! I don't know how everyone else is formatting theirs if they did fic and art but I'm going to put both here! 💕

- - - - -

Overlooked

prompt! - I’ve always loved the differences in the two boys while growing up, I imagine Steve having huge Christmas parties with champagne flutes and the works and Billy being invited and happy to spend time with Steve, he really is!, it’s just a lot he isn’t used to. All up to author interpretations: make as fluffy or angsty as you want ;)

summary! - Steve forgets they were supposed to hang out elsewhere while his parents threw their annual Christmas party and agrees to stay.

Luckily, Billy doesn’t mind!

The only problem is, they don’t get to hang out... and Billy starts to feel overlooked.

- - - - -

Billy couldn’t be more out of place.

Parties were his thing, don’t get that wrong. He could get drunk, smoke, fuck, do whatever and if Steve was with him, only then it was infinitely better. 

But this wasn’t a party. Not the party he knew. It felt more like a corporate gathering or a birthday for someone he didn’t know and he only ended up on the list because his boyfriend’s involved. Which wouldn’t be a problem if everyone around him wasn’t two to three times his age and he actually got to hang out with said boyfriend. 

But it’s fine. It’s been fine so far.

Crystal champagne flutes and ugly holiday sweaters just aren’t necessarily Billy’s forte. He can’t fathom how much Steve’s parents spent on this party alone and can only bet that it cost more than the monthly payment for the house on Cherry Road. Not that he has much resentment towards what Steve’s parents do with their money but it just seems… unnecessary. 

He takes a sip from his flute, rustling the jacket resting on his lap before leaning further into the sofa to try and wait this out despite already being here for what seems like hours. Billy gradually looks up again and stares into the other room where he can see Steve and his parents.

He can’t see their faces, but he can see Steve’s. Their backs are turned to him - Steve’s off to the side - they’re merely silhouettes so he can’t tell if his parents are just being gregarious or snobby. Then again, neither of them really talk about their parents so Billy has no clue.

Billy watches as a couple leaves, the discomfort continues to overrule Steve’s face as suddenly another appears and the cycle starts over again for what seems about the hundredth time. He huffs, kicking the shagged carpet beneath him before lowly cursing himself out. Should he have reminded him what they were going to do tonight? Or would Steve have rather stayed here? 

He can’t tell whether or not Steve’s just over some of the pretentious attitudes and comments he’s overheard in the past hour or that he’s trying to break the chain and get over to him so they can do something together. He could always get drunk and wait for Steve to get done, he knows where the brunette keeps a bottle of scotch that he stole from his dad’s liquor cabinet in the office. 

He blinks, lips sucked in to form a seal as he thinks. “Should I go home?” Billy whispers, soft and hurt. There’s not really a point in staying and maybe he can see if Jonathan has anything new to smoke. Deep, contemplative breath.

Billy stands up and discards his glass on the side table next to him before throwing on his coat and grabbing his scarf. Everything from then to going outside flashed by like a blur, nothing of importance really stricken in his mind other than colored sweaters and the sheen of champagne glasses hitting his eye. His breath is almost heavy as he opens the door and a wave of ice rushes over him. It bites at his nose, almost makes him want to itch it but he ventures out regardless. Billy slowly closes it behind him.

Billy sighed softly, eyes falling to the ground. It’s been snowing all day. Coming and going with the wind and dusting every road, house, and tree with freckles of white. Granted, everything was coated before it got too dark and hopefully, the roads weren’t iced over for any of the poor drunks inside. Steam rolled from his mouth as he exhaled before taking a deep breath. Billy threw the end of his scarf over his shoulder and looked out where his car should be, a somber smile passing his lips but twisting into a frown. Steve told him he could park where his family parks.

His feet felt like they were superglued to the deck, that, or like boulders had been tied to the ends of them. Billy bit his bottom lip and fidgeted with his coat pockets, sort of kicked the snow from under him.

He swallowed hastily, a lump bouncing in his throat as he looked out again. Couldn’t pinpoint the emotion to anything else but a pang of burning guilt. Maybe he should have just gone up to him, shouldn’t have made a big deal out of feeling left out, taken him away from his parents so they could go upstairs or leave.

Someone jerked open the sliding doors. Light poured from the inside, Billy twisted around to identify the backlit figure expecting a drunk only to find a breathless, seemingly worried Steve. Billy wanted to furrow his brows and walk off into the snow where he knew damn well Steve wouldn’t go into with house shoes on, but for some reason, he stayed put. Watches as Steve shuts the door behind him and rubs at his arm.

“What are you doing out here?”

Billy doesn’t respond.

Steve seems to catch on, and their eyes lock. 

There have been times when Billy goes outside during a party to catch his breath, maybe sneak around back to talk to Steve about one thing or another, maybe drunkenly make out and hope no one was watching or Tommy had their back. But they hadn’t been to a party for a long while, not since September. And, Billy doesn’t just bring his car keys with him to ‘catch his breath’.

Billy broke contact with a sharp ‘huh’. “Did you forget about me?"

“What? No! Why would you think that?” Steve shuddered, pulling his hands into his sleeves.

Billy looked back up with dagger-like eyes, “Because it seems an awfully lot like you did.”

“Well, I didn’t.”

He could bite back, the very opportunity hanging in front of his nose. But he didn’t. Instead, a familiar quiver caught his lip. Lingering feelings creeping up and forcing his hand to itch at his pocket. Billy shook his head, eyes falling to the ground. 

Steve frowned, aware of the events to follow. He’s known the other long enough to recognize the outline of Marlboros in any pocket. Deep down wishes there was some other habit Billy bid in, but that’s a matter of discussion that needs to be saved for later.

Eventually, the pack came out. Steve chewed on the inside of his cheek as he watched Billy, his lighter flaring until the end emitted a pale red before shakily tucking it away. He shook his head again slow and somber like. 

“I’m sorry.” Billy started, hands moving along with his words. “And it’s not that I don’t want to be here. You’re just,” he sighed, “busy.”

Steve’s lips sealed tightly at the comment. He saw the discomfort present in the other’s sentences, could feel guilt churn in the pit of his stomach. Thing is Steve wasn’t the slightest bit spiteful, he was pissed at himself for not taking action to check up on the other. Not considering bringing another friend with them in case something like this happened. He’s upset because they were supposed to do something together tonight besides this but he forgot and agreed to be here. Steve watched him take a drag, self-spite running through his veins. 

The corners of Steve’s eyes pinched, his throat tightening as he spoke, “No, I’m sorry! This sucks, this whole thing has sucked. I stressed myself out over decorating for the party and was so excited to hang out! I didn’t mean to agree but I forgot! And mom and dad keep introducing me to people. I- I wanted to spend time with you! I didn’t want to be here!” Steve took a step forward before shaky inhale. “This is my fault, this shouldn’t have happened.”

The next few seconds were the two boys staring at one another, each waiting on the other to say something. Billy was at a loss. Steve had a million thoughts streaming through his mind, hoping that the blonde wouldn’t just turn away and leave. 

Eventually, Billy glanced at the door, peering through to check if the blinds were shut as a faint smile appeared. Billy’s lips pressed against Steve’s before he could protest, his hand meeting to cup the brunette’s jaw and brush over the apple of his cheek with his calloused thumb and cigarette in the other. Steve’s tears wetted his cheeks, he didn’t mind it all that much. The shock melted into comfort as Steve cherished the kiss, pouted when Billy slowly pulled away from him. The slight tinge of champagne lingering on the other’s lips, the heat of their bodies giving them a little warmth.

Billy craned his head - albeit Steve was taller - until their foreheads met. 

“Don’t apologize. I get it.” Billy whispered. Steve gave a small, dismissive ‘huff’.

“My boyfriend should come before a stupid party. I should have told them otherwise.” 

Billy shook his head. “The party’s nice. You beat yourself up too much over this kind of stuff, I forget things too. Remember the creek?” 

Steve giggled, lips twisting into a smile. “In July when you were supposed to meet me there and didn’t show up? And I stayed there all night?”

Billy frowned as he thought into it, the bitter call at one in the morning that turned into a week of not talking to one another. It ended nicely though - if ‘nice’ was drunk car sex in the middle of the woods. There wasn’t much of an apology there but hey, they’re still trying to work on things and figure out how exactly relationships work because they aren’t exactly a sixty-year-old couple with forty years of experience behind the boy’s backs.

“I still owe you for that. Sorry.” His eyes fell to the deck as he pulled his head away, bumping his cigarette against his finger and watching the ash fall.

After Steve noticed the shift he got quiet, frowned, and eyes followed Billy’s to the wooden boards below. “Don’t apologize,” Steve echoed with a light smile. Gently Steve grabbed Billy’s scarf and drew him in for a slower, deeper kiss. 

People forget things, that’s human nature. And sometimes they can be a bit dumb about it too. But this was going to be the boy’s first Christmas, granted it wasn’t exactly Christmas yet, but it was important to them both. Spending time with a significant other on a holiday was amazing even if they can’t shout it out to everyone they know. 

These moments always have a sort of energy to them. When the boys share a wordless amalgamation of self-deprecating thoughts after ‘messing something up’ and those little habits come out to bite to express those thoughts oh so clearly.  It’s a ball of weird energy that shines in self-hate that the two have been working to eliminate and hey, they’ve gotten pretty far! But, it’s still there. Smiling in the corner of the boy’s minds. Ready to strike at any moment. It’s just a lot smaller now. 

Because again, don’t have the forty years and that’s perfectly valid even if the two don’t seem to realize it.

Billy leaned into the sweet kiss before Steve drew back. Billy chuckled and wrapped his arms around the other as he tucked his face into Steve’s neck. Steve shook again, this time cuddling up to the other and ravishing in the heat and short breaths coming out of them both.

“I wanna go inside,” Steve mumbled, rubbing at the other’s back.

Billy laughed and slowly pulled away to look at Steve. “Too cold?” 

“I’m in a sweater and sweatpants,” Steve pulled on his scarf again and toyed with the frayed ends. The grin Billy responded with brimmed with bliss, his hand roaming up and held the other’s with a firm hold,

“I’ll meet you inside.”

Steve had ventured back into the party while Billy snuffed his cigarette into the deck, eventually, the two found one another next to the food Steve’s parents had catered instead of cooking this year. Only thing that wasn’t in foil baking trays was the Christmas cookies that Billy had been dying to try ever since Steve brought them up at the beginning of December. Drinks clattered in group cheers from the surrounding areas, the smooth music now bearable. He never expected that a party this foreign to him would turn out for the better. Never thought he would feel… like a part of it? The crystal flutes, richies, and overall appeal still don’t rock with him, but with Steve, he has someone there for him. And that’s all Billy could ever ask for.

Thankfully, he didn’t feel like he was going to projectile vomit champagne anymore… the nausea sort of faded after Steve kissed him outside. Billy turned to Steve, noting the rosy shade still dancing on the apples of his cheeks from outside.

“Your sweater isn’t that ugly,” Billy emphasized, chewing on an ornament-shaped cookie.

Steve shook his head with an amused sigh, sweeping the crumbs from his shirt. “This isn’t that kind of party, if it was I would’ve had you help me make one.”

“Are you sure? Because I don’t think Karen from Fiance got the memo.” Billy pointed into the crowd at the woman in question. Her sweater took the cake for one of the ugliest, tensile hangs from her torso, lights strung all over, buttons on the brink of falling off. “You think she beats her kids over the head with a bible?” Steve rolled his eyes. Billy smirked at the little glare he’d received. “You should have pulled out your grandmother’s cat vests.” 

Steve gagged, eyes wide and ridden with disgust. “Keep talking and you’re going to make me throw up. I never want to see those again.” Billy snorts and Steve shoves him with a laugh, “It’s not funny!”

“But you’re laughing!” Billy remarks and lightly bumps him back returning the bubbling laughter.

A woman seems to overhear their laughs and spins around with the biggest and brightest grin Billy’s ever seen. It kind of startled him. Doesn’t know who she is, doesn’t care to know until he recognizes the cat vest and how familiar those brown, round doe eyes are. She runs up to them, curls bouncing on her shoulders as she approaches with a drink in hand. Mrs. Harrington gasped, grabbing onto Steve’s sweater with eyes darting between both boys, “Is this Billy?”

Steve smirks and rolls his eyes again. “Hi, Mom. I’m back Mom.” She lightly wacks him in the arm. “Yes! This is Billy.”

Her eyes lit up, dazzled with happiness as she stuck her attention on the blonde as he snuck another cookie in his mouth. “Steve talks about you all the time!”

“What? No, I don’t!” Steve’s eyebrows knit together as he tried to defend himself but deep down knew there was no hope, especially after Billy gave him that smug but appreciative little look as his mom went on her story-telling rampage. 

Billy laughs, almost in disbelief, “Really?”

“He talks about all of his friends, really. But, oh! When it comes to you he goes on and on and on, he really thinks you’re something.” Billy watched as the tips of Steve’s ears tinted themselves red and smirked. An interesting conversation for later. “I’m so upset that I haven’t been able to meet you until now! You two are always out or asleep by the time I get home.”

Billy’s brows quirked in an expression of sarcasm. “Well, thank you for not waking me up at two in the morning to introduce yourself.”

Mrs. Harrington chuckled, shaking her head before putting her hand on Steve’s shoulder. “I’m going to go get another drink. Oh, and Billy!” She paused and made eye contact, “If you want to come over for Christmas, you’re more than welcome too! Just tell Steve so I know.”

Billy’s brows flew upwards, blush rising and Steve picking it up instantly. She waved goodbye before walking around them and going off on her journey into another room. The boys stared again, each waiting on the other to say something until the brunette spoke up.

"She likes you," Steve muttered, ears still red as ever.

"You talk about me to her? I think that's cute."

He huffed. Had to stop himself from leaning against the other to hide his face. "Mom likes knowing what friends are up to."

Billy loosely smiled, slowly bumping into Steve with his hip before getting a light bump back. “You look a lot like her.” Steve shook his head.

“Not as much as my dad,” Steve turned to see if he was there and frowned when he didn’t see the other but slowly faded into a smile. “I don’t know where he is, he would have loved to meet you.”

The boys got quiet again.

Billy cleared his throat, his head tilted down as if to duck away to hide his blush and the movement didn’t go unnoticed by Steve. “About coming over for Christmas-” 

“I want you to.” He softly tugged on his jacket to get his attention. Eventually, Billy made eye contact, grinned with a chuckle following behind. Christmas with Steve? His caring boyfriend, twenty million cookies, a few possible presents, and… some loving parents? 

Billy couldn’t be happier.

[nanoland]

new chapter (lucifer fic)

(earlier parts are here; whole thing is here) 

Ponder on the Narrow House, part 3 

Mazikeen + Eve + Michael, gen fic (for now), warning for gun violence 

0   

Along the California coastline, the cruise ship Illustrious Voyager bore four thousand three hundred and ten passengers, one thousand two hundred and ninety-six crewmembers, and two guide dogs.

Five thousand six hundred and eight souls, in total.

At around 4pm, without anyone noticing, that number became five thousand six hundred and nine.

Hands clasped behind her back, Eve strolled down the promenade, admiring the vessel’s size and beauty. This fresh new millennium’s wealth astonished her. Sickened, sometimes. Entranced, sometimes. But always astonished.

Back in the garden, they’d slept on and under rocks. When it rained, they got wet. When large animals came by, they hid. No weapons. No shelter. No blankets. The only resource they’d had in abundance was food. Good grief – so much food. God had been so proud of all the different fruits and nuts and mushrooms he’d made available to them, and Adam had been so grateful. Eve supposed she had been, too.

It hadn’t stopped her from one day approaching her husband and the plump rabbits resting in his lap – two of several dozen pets – and asking if he didn’t think the cold nights would be much more endurable if they each had a warm pair of fur slippers.

Then she’d met Lucifer. Fallen in love. Bitten the apple. Learned how powerful he and his Father truly were. That was when the real questions, the sticky, prickly questions, had come bubbling up.

If Lucifer has such a vast family, with so many siblings, why can’t I have even one? she’d asked the sky. Why is Adam all I get?

And later: If You can simply bring people into existence, why must I scream and bleed and shit myself in order to have children? Am I doing it wrong? Is there another way? If there isn’t, why not?

And later: Why is nothing fair?

And, most recently, after meeting Mazikeen: Why isn’t everything at least equally unfair? Why do humans get a world of options while Maze and her family are expected to serve angels from birth to death? Why isn’t Maze allowed into Heaven, even after an eternity of loyalty and hard work?

“Sorry,” she said, flashing white teeth at a passing crewmember. “I’m trying to find a friend of mine. Can you tell me how to get to Room 835?”

Half an hour later, there was a splash and the ship’s population dropped to five thousand six hundred and seven.

Before binding his arms and legs, Eve had secured Andrew Bismarck’s lifejacket and gagged him. Furious and helpless, he bobbed alongside her as the ship moved on and Mazikeen rowed up in her inflatable raft, wearing a sunset-orange swimsuit.

“Should I be worried about those, babe?” she asked as she gripped Bismarck’s lifejacket and hauled him out of the water.

Eve smiled at the dolphin pod swimming in playful loops around her, and patted the nearest one’s nose. “No. They’re my friends.”

The inflatable wasn’t big enough for three people, so Eve held on to a friend’s dorsal fin and let him drag her back to The Choronzon.

Michael stood on the deck, looking bored. As they climbed aboard, their prisoner slung over Mazikeen’s shoulder, he drawled, “Seriously? This sad specimen’s worth two million dollars?”

“Actually, his net worth is eight hundred million,” said Mazikeen, dumping him down. “Two million is just what his ex-wife is willing and able to pay.”

Wringing out her hair, Eve added, “She took half his money in the divorce but she gave almost all of it to a chimpanzee shelter. I really like her!”

His lip curled. “How delightfully sordid. Isn’t this all a little beneath you, Ms Mazikeen? I mean, you’re a big deal in Hell. High Commander of Lucifer’s legions, head advisor to the king himself. Aren’t you worried taking jobs like this diminishes you?”

Busy handcuffing Bismarck to the railing, Mazikeen said, “Eve, honey? Do me a favour?”

“Boop!” Eve chirped, having already snuck up behind Michael, and pushed him overboard.

“I know it’s your whole gimmick,” Mazikeen called down as he splashed and spluttered, his face red with princely indignation. “And I know you don’t have a lot else going for you. But the next time you try that on me, I will stop being nice. Kapish?”

“Kapish,” he muttered.

The Choronzon had barely travelled a mile before Eve spotted Bismarck’s henchmen coming after them.

“Someone gimme details!” shouted Mazikeen, busy putting a bulletproof vest on over her bikini and opening up the box she’d told Dan contained a fishing rod, not a halberd.

Eve peered through her binoculars. “Two speedboats. Twelve guys on jet skis. Guns everywhere.”

“Heh. Awesome. Mickey – move that tight ass to the front and make like a nice juicy target.”

“Wait, what about-…” Michael began, trailing off as Mazikeen dove gracefully into the sea.

Bouncing from foot to foot, Eve shot him a grin. “Don’t look so glum, sourpuss. This is the fun part.”

She’d never spoken to Michael in Heaven, despite the millennia they’d both resided only two miles apart, her in a lakeside cottage on the outskirts of the Silver City, him in the crystal palace in its centre.

Granted, she’d not exactly had a warm and fuzzy relationship with any of Lucifer’s siblings. They all knew what had happened in the garden. Some had been nice – Amenadiel had visited often, even though he’d never had much to say and they’d spent their time together skipping stones across the lake’s surface. But the others had kept her at a distance. She was a bad influence.

Michael, however, was the only angel she’d not ever said one word to.

She’d seen him, now and then, in the early days, when she was the only human in Heaven and, as such, grudgingly invited to divine family get-togethers. On those occasions, she’d spent too much time feeling awkward and out-of-place to pay attention to the sullen figure lurking in whatever shadows were available. The one time she’d glanced his way, it had been to marvel at the stories of people getting the twins mixed up; beyond the raw basics of bone structure, Michael couldn’t have looked less like her old lover.

Bullets sprayed across the hull. Humming, Eve stepped daintily into Michael’s shadow, seconds before they started bouncing off his shoulders and chest.

“It is beneath her,” he muttered.

She made an ambiguous noise. “How d’you figure?”

There came a shout and a splash from the nearest jet ski. The bullets stopped.

“C’mon. She’s Mazikeen. Everyone in the Silver City knows about Mazikeen. Ordinarily, we couldn’t give two dry shits about Lucifer’s minions, but her? She’s a minor celebrity. The power behind Hell’s throne. Christ, it’s no secret my beloved twin couldn’t govern his way out of a paper bag.”

“Yeah,” she said, smiling fondly. “He’s kind of bad at everything. Except music. He’s a great musician.”

More shouting. More shooting. More bullets bouncing off Michael’s torso. Mazikeen rode by, one hand gripping her newly-acquired jet ski’s throttle lever, the other clutching her bloodstained halberd. Watching her circle the enemy, Eve was reminded of a sheep dog.

Michael went on: “And then there’s the fact that for a while, everyone thought Lucifer was going to marry her. It was all anyone could talk about. Jophiel was taking bets on when the proposal would happen. She’d have been High Commander and the Queen of Hell. Instead? All of a sudden, Lucifer takes an indefinite vacay to the mortal realm, drags her with him, and next thing anyone knows, she’s working behind a bar.”

The remaining jet skis and their terrified, wounded riders had been neatly rounded up, which meant it was time for Eve to open her purse.

“Um – how long have those been in there?” asked Michael, watching her take out three grenades.

“You want one?” she offered. “Don’t forget to take the pin out before you throw it. I did that my first time.”  

One thing to be said for millions of dull, dull years spent sitting next to God’s Greatest Warrior, skipping stones across a lake; your aim got good.

The first blast was a warning, not close enough to actually kill any of Bismarck’s men, though the resultant waves did knock several into the water. They tried to retreat, turning their vehicles around, only to remember Mazikeen, corralling them single-handed and now armed with machine guns she’d confiscated from those already bested.

When they saw the second and third grenade incoming, they gave up and abandoned the jet skis, jumping into the sea and swimming for their lives.

“Fuck!” Michael yelped, blocking his ears at the concomitant explosions.

Gazing past the debris and smoke, Eve saw Mazikeen head for the nearest of the two speedboats. Its occupants, preoccupied with aiming a rocket launcher at The Choronzon, saw her coming far too late.

“I get your point,” said Eve, as her girlfriend and her halberd made short work of the crew. “But that’s a really… how can I put this? It’s a really angelic way of looking at things. Maze doesn’t consider anything ‘beneath her’.”

“Wow. Sick burn. You’re basically admitting she has no pride.”

“Oh, she’s got pride. Tons of pride. Her pride’s just dependant on how well she does a job, not on the type of job she has. She wasn’t happy working at Lux, but that wasn’t because she thought bartending was ‘beneath her’; it was because she prefers doing things she’s good at. Customer service isn’t really one of her strengths.”

The second speedboat was abandoned by its crew mere seconds before Mazikeen rammed the first speedboat into it, cackling victoriously.

“Actually,” Eve said, moving from Michael’s shadow to where Mazikeen had earlier set a crate of peach soda – her favourite – out on the deck, “now that you mention it, I guess I’m the one with no pride. Haven’t really ever had anything to be proud of. Your Dad never gave me the chance. I was never meant to do things. I was just meant to be.”

Michael snorted. “Lucky you. Trust me; he may have softened in his later years, but back in the day he never, ever stopped riding our asses. You think Lucy really rebelled because he had better plans for how the universe should be run? Because he was an innovator? Nope. Lazy dick just hated being told to do his chores.”

By the time Mazikeen swam back to them, saltwater had washed off the blood and her ponytail had come loose.

“Oh, hey,” said Eve, gripping her hand and pulling her up. “A mermaid.”

After pressing a rough kiss to her cheek and taking a swig of peach soda, Mazikeen asked, “You okay? He did his job?”

Eve patted the angel’s shoulder – the one that wouldn’t hurt. “He was terrific! Awesome addition to the team.”

“I didn’t do anything,” Michael mumbled.

Ignoring him, Mazikeen snatched up a towel to dry her hair. “Glad to hear it. Alright! Let’s get Bismarck back to shore, get paid, and find a place to have dinner so we can toast Team Hellrazor’s first successful mission.”

“R-A-Z-O-R,” Eve informed Michael. “To make it cooler.”