#like lectures are dead silent and pretty much everyone sits alone

[yellowshulker]

i think starting uni post-covid and living at home is the worst combination in the WORLD actually

[beels-burger-babe]

Of Jealousy and Friendship - Pt. 1

Topic number 2 won in the vote to be written next! So without further-a-do, let’s get going!...This ended up being a two part thing. Oh Well. Here’s part one. - B GN! MC Summary: MC makes a lower demon friend who may secretly be hoping for something more than friendship. The Demon Bros are not about to let this happen. Part Two: Here, Epilogue: Here It all started in magical potions. When you first arrived, the course wasn’t so bad since you took it with Beelzebub. The two of you always partnered up; the hour would consist of you jokingly scolding Beel for trying to eat ingredients and making light hearted jokes with one another whenever the teacher turned their back.  But once the second semester started, Beel was moved out of the course as it had gotten too expensive to keep him in a class where most of the subject matter was edible.  Which left you alone and bored in the classroom as the teacher went on and on about Mandrake roots and what they can be used for. You let out a heavy sigh and plopped your forehead onto the desk.  A soft snort came from beside you. You glanced over to see a demon with his feet propped up on his desk staring right back at you out of the corner of his dark green eyes. He smiled at you with a tilt of his head.  “The lectures are a total snooze fest right? I joined this class cause I thought we’d be making potions and causing stuff to explode. Not sitting here twisting our thumbs all day.” 

You bit back a laugh as you worried glanced over at the professor, who was none-the-wiser to the little conversation the two of you were sharing. You looked back over to the demon. His dark skin caused those hauntingly green eyes of his pop out at all who met his gaze, with carefully trimmed and styled black curls sitting stylishly on the top of his head.  There was a playful and mischievous energy to him that reminded you of Belphie, Asmo and Mammon.  “Unfortunately suffering through this section of class is mandatory to be allowed to mess around with the fun stuff.”  The demon groaned and threw his head back. “Urgh, that’s so unfair. What’s the worst that can happen? The potion explodes and kills us? Newsflash teach, we’re already dead.”  You couldn’t help the laugh that slipped out at that one.  “Well actually the worse that could happen, for you at least as I am a very mortal human, is that you’d suffer the consequences from one of the potions. Anything from shrinking to de-aging to charms, all kinds of things. I’ve seen the effects of a potion gone wrong a number of times during my time down here. Trust me; you don’t want to be on the receiving end.”  He looked over at you with an analytical eye as the corners of his lips tilted upwards. “So you’re the human that everyone’s talking about.” He trailed off, and glanced over at the teacher to make sure they weren’t looking before stretching out his hand towards you. “I’m Cane. You know despite being the talk of RAD, I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone mention your name?”  You took his hand into your own and lightly shook it. “I’m MC.” 

Cane leaned back into his chair, “It’s a pleasure to finally put a name and face to that glowing reputation of yours, MC. I see your pretty good at this potions thing, and I hear that you’re a lot of fun. How about you meet me downtown for supper later and we can study and get to know each other a little better?”  Your initial instinct was to agree, but then you paused as you thought of the brothers. “I don’t know. I don’t think that Lucifer or the others would like it much if I went out on my own.”  The demon huffed and light heartedly rolled his eyes. “You won’t be alone, you’ll be with me. I may not be as powerful as them, but I’m still a pretty good fighter.” He teasingly placed a gentle punch onto your shoulder, “Besides, it’s not like they’re boss of you. Are you really going to let a bunch of snobby Lords keep you from making the best of your time in the Devildom?”  That last remark hit a nerve. If there was one thing that had spread quite quickly about you around RAD, it was that you were known for being a little reckless, prideful, and never being able to back down from a challenge, and boy did that statement have you itching to prove him wrong.  You smiled, a sharp dangerous smile, at Cane. “I’ll go. And we’re going to do so much more than just go to a lame restaurant and study. You want to have fun and take risks? We’ll have fun and take risks. Whatever you want to do...to a degree,” you added in quickly remembering that you were talking to a demon and if you didn’t implement any boundaries there was no telling what you’d get yourself into, “I’m in.”  Cane’s eyes sparkled as his smile widened. “Damn. I guess it’s true that you’re a bit of dare devil. Alright, you’re on. Meet me at Hell’s Kitchen a 4pm. We’ll study and hit the books as promised, but afterwards...Get ready for the night of your life.”  ***

The brothers were concerned. You had rushed into the House of Lamentation after school and sprinted to your room, changed out of your uniform and promptly shouted that you were “going out” before taking off before any of them could complain.  Mammon had tried to argue that someone should follow you, and while that wasn’t a terrible idea, Lucifer wanted to give you the question of the doubt. Worst case scenario, you come back home a little scratched up and learn your lesson about taking off into the dangers of the Devildom.  At least that’s what he had thought when you had initially left.  It was now bordering midnight, and you had yet to return home.  So yeah, the brothers were very concerned.  Mammon was pacing and ranting about how this all could’ve been avoided if they had only listened to him for once.  Leviathan was trying to distract himself with his game, but everyone could see the worried glances he kept throwing to the entrance and clock as the minutes ticked by.  Satan sat near where Mammon and would occasionally scold or correct him, and sometimes even throw in his own ideas on what could be done while he thumbed through a book on location spells.  Asmodeus was strangely quiet, sitting near the fire by himself with arms wrapped around his torso as he stared into the flames. He would occasionally move a hand to wipe at his face before it went right back to hugging himself.  Beelzebub had lost his appetite. He sat next to Belphie, taking comfort in his twin’s presence, while Belphegor pretended to be unbothered and asleep, even though his mind was racing with the many stupid situations you could’ve gotten yourself into.  And Lucifer...He just sat in a door near the entryway, his eyes fixed on the entrance as he silently waited.  Finally, just as the clock stroke midnight, they could hear your recognizable laugh from behind the door.  “Oh my god! That was incredible! I don’t think I’ve ever had so much fun in life!” Leviathan stiffened at the statement, his hands gripping tighter onto his game.  “What did I tell you? I promised you the night of your life, and I sure as Diavolo always make sure to deliver,” everyone froze at the sound of the teasing male voice. “Though I didn’t expect the Seven Lords’ precious human to be a complete bad ass. You were amazing out there.”  Leviathan mumbled something before getting up and leaving the room. Mammon growled lowly and looked at the others, “Anyone know who the hell that is?”  Asmo finally stood, wiping at his face as he did, and began to stride towards the door, “Why don’t we find out?”  Without waiting for a response, Asmodeus swung the door open and pulled on a bright smile as he reached out and wrapped an arm around you. “MC, darling, you didn’t tell me you were bringing over guests! Don’t tell me you’re trying to have fun without me?”  You blinked up at the Asmo before smiling softly at his tactics. “Oh, hey Asmo! I didn’t expect you to be up. Cane here was just dropping me off.”  The demon in question didn’t even so much as stiffen as Asmodeus’s dangerous stare shifted over to him. Instead Cane stood there, relaxed, with a shit-eating grin on his face. Asmodeus raised an eyebrow at him and allowed a bit of his demonic aura to exude around him. “Oh really? At this time of night? Makes a demon wonder what kind of mischief the two of you had gotten up to,” while maintaining eye contact with Cane, Asmo rested his chin against your shoulder. “You know dear, if you wanted “fun” that badly all you had to do was ask. I assure you I could’ve shown you a much better time.” He purred and softly kissed your shoulder.  You shivered, missing the way Asmo stiffened as he noticed something, and swatted at the Avatar of Lust as you moved away from him. “Down Asmo. It’s nothing like that. Cane’s in my magical potions class. We went out to study together and decided to hit a couple clubs while we were out. No biggy.”  “If it’s ‘no biggy’ then why were you out all night without giving us any kind of warning of where you were going or how long you’d be out?” Everyone whirled around as Lucifer stood in the doorway with a frown etched on his face and his arms crossed. He took a step closer to you before freezing mid-step, his nose twitching. His eyes flared red as they fell onto Cane. The lower demon tensed and curled his hands into fists, but seemed to be refusing to back down. Lucifer snarled, “What exactly was it that you said the two of you were up to tonight?”  You frowned and stepped between Lucifer and your new friend. “Hey! Stop it! He didn’t do anything, if that’s what you’re implying. And I wasn’t aware that I needed permission for every single thing that I do!” You snapped poking his chest as you moved into his space. “So excuse me for wanting to go out and enjoy myself for once!”  Whatever fear Cane had been showing, quickly slipped away at seeing you stand your ground against the mighty first born. “Yeah. What they said.”  Lucifer growled and caught your hand into his own, pulling you close and leaning in, “You’d be wise to remember that you are in the Devildom and surrounded by beings that have no where near as good intentions as you’d assume. Being so reckless and naïve down here could get you killed again, I thought you had learned that.” His tone was cold and unapologetic as he practically spat the words in your face.  You glared at Lucifer as you yanked your hand out of his grasp. There was so many things you wanted to say to him, but none of them would be right to say in front of an audience. You huffed and turned to face Cane. “I am so sorry about those two. Thanks again for tonight and bringing me home. I’ll see you tomorrow in class, okay?”  Cane gave you a side smile as he scratched the back of his neck. “It’s nothing. I had a great time hanging out with you. Hopefully we can do again...under better circumstances. Goodnight MC.” He took a step towards you and pulled you into a hug.  You smiled, wondering how Lucifer and Asmo could be stirring up such a fuss about a guy who had been nothing but kind to you, and gently hugged him back.  What you couldn’t see, was Cane making direct eye contact with the two other demons, as one of his wrists gently brushed up and down you back and he very lightly nuzzled, so lightly that you could just barely feel it, his face against your neck.  “Hey, what’s takin’ everyone so- WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK?!” Mammon stormed forward and yanked you out of the demon’s embrace, already changing into his demon form. “Who the hell do you think you are scenting our human, huh?!” He lifted Cane off the ground by the collar of his shirt, causing the lower demon growl as he scratched at Mammon’s hands.  You yanked on Mammon’s jacket and arms and tried to get him to back off. “Woah! Mammon, relax! It was just a hug!”  “No it wasn’t,” Satan grumbled as he and the rest of the brothers (excluding Leviathan who was now sulking in his room) stood in the door way. “The fact that you don’t know that makes this even worst. But this isn’t a conversation we should be having out here.” Beel stared down at the demon with a fierce glare. “You should leave while you’re still able. And if you know what’s best for you, you’ll stay away from MC.”  “Wha- Beel! Cut that out!”  Cane took a step backwards, fear beginning to spill into his expression as he finally realizes just how out-powered and out-numbered he is. Still, he was stubborn pain in the ass; it was part of the reason he had been so drawn to you in the first place as he related to your reckless habits. He held Beelzebub’s glare and returned it with one of his own. “I think that MC can choose for themself who they do and do not hang out with, thanks. They already said they wanted to see me tomorrow so they will. We’re friends after all. And classmates,” his grin sharpened as he continued. “I do have to thank you, Lord Beelzebub, for that opening in magical potions by the way. Never would’ve got in if you hadn’t been kicked out.”  Before he could say anymore, he was met with a punch in the face. Belphegore lazily shook out his hand and his looked at Cane with an unbothered expression. “I believe we told you to leave. Now get. The. Fuck. Out.”  Cane scoffed and turned to you once more. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, Dare Devil.”  You would’ve snorted at the nickname, but you were to distracted from the brother’s behavior. “Yeah. I’ll see you tomorrow. Get home safe, Cane.” With another nod, the demon left; leaving you alone with six of the seven brothers bubbling with jealousy, anger, and concern.

[sunlightandsuffering]

milfkasa > dilfren

Mikasa must always come first

AHAHAH THIS IS SO FUNNY 🤣🤣 she does and Eren knows it 🤣🤣 ugh imma write a Drabble bc I have to wait 2 hours in my car.

Usually it’s him that gets hit on, almost every time it never fails, always him. He heads into parent teacher interviews and they grill him, the women like hawks. Single moms who want him to be their kid’s father figure, their next husband.

Of course he deals with this like a real man every time, because he’s not scared of school moms not at all. So like any smart husband would, he hides behinds Mikasa and makes his angry wife deal with it. Usually a menacing glare is enough to scare them off.

Today is no different, since he’s been alone in the lobby while Mikasa hits the bathroom he’s been asked by three different woman which child is his, which class they’re in. Followed promptly with aww she’s such a sweet girl when he tells them Yumi is his oldest. When he follows with the fact that he has two more they put their hands on his forearms and without fail ask if Mrs. Yeager is still in the picture, hoping for divorce, an impending separation as they eye his wedding ring. Maybe he's widowed, and he always has to break their hearts, but he doesn't really mind too much, Mikasa is always worth it.

Some brunette woman is going in for the kill, she’s been scoping him out for a little while now and finally she works up the nerve to say something.

“So is your child in this class to?”

Eren is about to answer, about to go through the whole spiel all over again when he spots his lovely wife coming to save him. Only she’s not alone.

There is a very attractive man with her, and Eren can only assume it’s Mr. Smith, his one and only competition. The one he’s heard everyone fawning over at after-school pickup. At first he'd honestly been a little offended that the PTA moms were cheating on him with another crush, but then he'd thought about Mikasa hearing him say that allowed and decided to purge it from his brain.

Eren’s gaze turns murderous when he sees just how chummy this jackass is being with his wife. That’s HIS wife Damn it!

Mikasa is laughing to, what the fuck??

But Eren will admit Mr. Smith is very attractive, black hair almost as nice as Mikasa’s and blue eyes he can see from here. Standing together with his wife they make a striking pair, Mikasa obviously outshining Mr. Smith obviously.

She’s wearing a little sweater dress to torture him with, exposing her pretty legs, those well-curved calves and the deep V of the sweater showing more than enough of her cleavage. It clearly has Mr.Smith’s attention, his eyes are practically glued to it.

Eren ignored brunette trying to talk to him and chooses to make his stand, Mikasa always does it for him. It’s really the least he can do.

Also he is insanely possessive and Mr. Smith just patted her shoulder when she laughed, unacceptable.

Before he can stop himself and consider Mikasa’s wrath for claiming her like a dog he does it. Eren stands, shocking the brunette and makes it to Mikasa in 3 short strides, arms finding her waist and chin resting on her head.

She stiffens for just a moment, before she relaxes, realizing it’s him.

“Watcha doin baby I think it’s almost our turn?”

It’s not almost their turn but he doesn’t want her talking to this attractive man it’s not fair.

“Eren,” Mikasa smiles tightly and he knows he’s in trouble for claiming her like a caveman but she’s his! He tightens his arms around her slightly, tucking her into his chest more.

“Hi, I’m Eren Mikasa’s husband.” Eren is very clear when he introduces himself to Mr. Smith and the man visibly pales.

“Nice to meet you, Mikasa was just telling me Yumi is in the same class as my son, thought it might be nice to organize a play date.”

“Maybe.” Eren tells him, smiling the whole time while he silently wars with Mikasa to keep her in his hold.

Their children will never be hanging out together, over his dead fucking body.

Mr. Smith looks unsure how to continue and Eren takes the opportunity to tug his wife away, “Well we should be getting back now, wouldn’t want to miss our names.”

“Bye Mikasa,” Mr. Smith tells his wife and Eren doesn’t give her a chance to say anything more dragging her away.

“Eren!” Mikasa explodes as soon as they’re alone and back in their half of the hallway in front of Yumi’s classroom.

He’s in big trouble.

“He was touching you!” He defends weakly.

“He rubbed my shoulder once!”

“Doesn’t matter only im allowed to rub your shoulders.”

They’re arguing in the middle of the hall and he thanks god everyone else is busy.

“Oh my god Eren we’re married! We have children!”

He pouts, sitting himself down on a nearby bench while she lectures him.

“I deal with shit like that all the time with you! I don’t do THAT.”

He looks away sullenly, he refuses to apologize.

She glares at him, arms crossed and tapping her foot, just like she does when she's upset with Yumi, disciplining their daughter, her's in big trouble. However, unlike Yumi, Eren has ways of dealing with his wife and they usually include kisses and bribery.

He grabs her by the waist as she’s about to launch into another tirade, causing her to help as she falls forward into his arms.

“Don’t care, you’re MY wife Mikasa and I’ll let everyone know.”

She scowls, “You don’t have to be such a caveman about it, you might as well have peed on me.”

He showers her in kisses, one on her nose, some to her eyelids, the apples of her cheeks.

“My Mikasa.”

She groans, “Yeah you stupid caveman your Mikasa.”

He smirks, holding her in his lap nice and close.

“You know I think I saw an empty janitors closet down the hall.”

She pauses, looking mock horrified as she considers his proposition, smacking him.

“Eren!” She chastises, but just like he expects she squirms a bit in his arms before leaning in, “I’ll race you.”

Then she abruptly takes off down the hall and Eren follows her at top speed.

[panharmonium]

you know what?

no.  absolutely not.

i already did part 1 of this post here.  i’m back again with part 2, because unfortunately the awfulness factor doesn’t stop with arthur, and as much as i adore hunith generally, this entire sequence is a MESS.

and yes, i am aware that pretty much nobody else thinks so.  every time i see this scene referenced in fandom, it is always framed as a fun, cutesy, sing-songy moment of “oooo, hunith ships merthur!”  literally every time.  

which, you know, like i always say about everything fandom-related - that’s fine.  everybody is going to enjoy things differently; you do you, and keep on having fun!  but here on my own blog, in my own space, i am gonna do me, and in this case ‘me’ involves yelling about how much i can’t stand that particular read, and how angry the end of 1.10 makes me.

disclaimer, to help folks curate their own fandom experiences: i am going to be Very Cranky for the rest of this post.  if you love this particular scene in the way i just mentioned, you will probably want to scroll on by, because this piece of meta most likely won’t be your jam.  as always, these are my personal thoughts and nobody is obligated to share them, so please do not hesitate to simply skip this post if we are on different wavelengths - instead, keep enjoying fandom in whatever way is most fun for you!

fair warning now given, off i go on a long, frustrated tirade.

i already wrote about the first half of this scene, where arthur decides that the appropriate thing to do at this particular moment is to give merlin a scolding about the evils of sorcery, despite the fact that the only reason arthur is even alive to deliver this lecture in the first place is because merlin’s ‘sorcerer’ best friend just DIED saving arthur’s life.  but sure, you know what, let’s use said best friend’s funeral to chastise merlin about how “dangerous” sorcerers are.  let’s just make that completely dickheaded decision.  

and, moving on to the second half of this scene - here’s the thing.  hunith overhears this entire conversation.  she overhears arthur telling merlin off about sorcery, in front of the burning corpse of merlin’s best friend, who is, as far as arthur knows, the ‘sorcerer’ who died saving arthur’s life.  

and yet, for some inexplicable reason, hunith still cannot get off the arthur pendragon train for two damn seconds.  

she has known arthur for less than a week.  by contrast, she has known will for his entire life.  but the instant arthur walks away, hunith sidles up next to merlin and says, “you’d better be going” - like.  okay, my god, can you try to hustle him away from his best friend’s in-progress funeral any faster?????  how about we maybe give him a second?  the pyre hasn’t even burnt down yet, and merlin hasn’t had a single second to himself since this sequence started.  he’s had to stand there and listen to arthur insult the dude who everyone is supposed to be memorializing, and then hunith - who overheard the entire thing - zips right over and tries to chivvy merlin on his way.  you’d better be going.

HELLO?!  the pyre is still roaring.  how about, instead of hassling merlin and hustling him offstage, everybody just sits down and waits for a minute.  how about they all just leave merlin alone for three everloving seconds.  

honestly, just - every time i think about this scene i get angrier.

i love hunith, and i know she’s well-intentioned.  but everything she gives merlin in this scene is the exact opposite of what he needs.  he doesn’t need to be hurried off the village green like there’s some reason he can’t stay there for the entirety of his friend’s funeral.  he doesn’t need to be pushed into going back to camelot when he is clearly struggling with the idea of leaving ealdor again.  and he absolutely does not need to be told how much someone else “needs” him right now, when he himself is the one who is having a fucking crisis and who needs someone to take care of him.

i cannot emphasize that last point enough.  it is just - beyond upsetting to me that hunith literally watches arthur shitting on merlin’s dead best friend (and, by proxy, merlin himself, since merlin is the actual sorcerer) and she still somehow thinks the right thing to do is walk over and start telling merlin how great arthur is and how arthur “needs” him and how merlin “belongs at arthur’s side.”  

i can’t stand that.  it makes me so angry.  it’s not right.  it’s not fair.  it’s damaging.  it’s the same shitty messaging that destroys merlin’s life in later seasons, this idea that he exists for someone else’s sake, the complete disregard for what he himself might want at any given moment, for what he himself might need, for the reservations he might have about this plan that other people have formulated for his life.

he is UNCOMFORTABLE when she says these things to him!  he doesn’t look at her; he shifts his gaze to arthur and the camelot squad with this grim, unconvinced expression on his face, and then he averts his eyes from her.

everything hunith tells merlin in this scene is the exact opposite of what he needs to hear.  he does not need someone to tell him how badly his services are “needed” by a man who hates the person merlin truly is, not when the only friend who ever accepted merlin’s true self has just been killed.  he does not need to be told that arthur, who is alive solely because will is dead and who only seconds ago expressed exactly zero gratitude for that sacrifice, is the person to whom merlin owes his undying loyalty.  he does not need to be shuffled off to camelot as quickly as possible, as if it would be better for him to just rush forward and forget what happened here, as if what happened here didn’t matter.  

because what happened here did matter, whether hunith and arthur find it convenient to acknowledge or not.  i have to lay this out again, because what happened to merlin in ealdor is so much more important than anybody ever seems to realize - and i do understand that, i really do (because yes, it was just one episode for us) - but we have to look at it from merlin’s perspective, not the audience’s.

will wasn’t ‘one episode’ for merlin.  

i can’t say this enough times.  i cannot say this loudly enough.

merlin, at the beginning of this show, has only ever had ONE FRIEND.

most of us can’t even imagine something like that.  

but try.  TRY.  

merlin has only ever had one friend.  he’s only ever had one friend to love him.  he only had one friend for the first two decades of his life.  he’s only been in camelot for a couple of months; he’s only known these camelot people for a couple of months, and they don’t know his real self anyhow.  and now his ONLY FRIEND, the person he’s known all his life, the only friend he ever had who knew him for who he truly was, was just violently cut down before his very eyes, whilst saving a guy who can legally have merlin murdered for just existing.  and even though merlin and will spend the entirety of 1.10 having a painful, complicated argument, will still uses his last moments on earth to tell the biggest fucking whopper of his life, in order to shield merlin from harm, taking all of the danger and infamy and condemnation upon himself.  he dies with a lie on his lips.  he dies with merlin’s hand in his hair.  

and all the while, merlin knows that this would not have happened if he had just been willing to use his magic in the first place, instead of letting his fear of discovery prompt him into allowing his neighbors to offer themselves up for the slaughter in his place.

the avalanching double-whammy of grief and guilt that merlin is suddenly slammed with at the end of this episode is almost incomprehensible in scale.

i’ve talked about this before, but again, i think it’s something we don’t generally remember: losing will is the first time merlin has ever experienced personal bereavement.  and he doesn’t get to start out with a warm-up; he goes straight to the big leagues.  this is not some trifling thing.  this is a total implosion of merlin’s world as he knows it.  

when we think about the mark this episode leaves on merlin’s life, i don’t think most of us consider the magnitude of this event deeply enough.  losing will in this way is not some one-off thing that merlin just...gets over.  this is the most earth-shattering thing that has ever happened to him, at this point in time.  it is still one of the worst things that has ever happened to him, period, even years later.  the guilt never goes away.  

and the thing that’s unique about this particular trauma is that merlin has to manage it alone.  there are other tragedies in his life where we witness him receiving support/comfort from others - freya, lancelot, balinor (though of course there are aspects to these miseries that merlin has to keep secret from other people, as well) - but with will, merlin has to do everything on his own.  he can’t get one single moment of peace at will’s funeral.  his own mother, the only person who knows what really happened, can’t help him without making everything about arthur.  and merlin can’t tell anyone else what happened, not the truth of it, because doing so would squander the gift he’s been given - will’s lie is still protecting him, years later, from arthur and morgana both.  

merlin, at the end of 1.10, is forced to navigate this grief completely alone, in the silent secrecy of his own heart.  arthur is actively making it worse.  hunith is out here singing arthur’s praises.  and will is just like - he’s suddenly not part of the conversation anymore.  he doesn’t even register on anyone’s radar.

it truly is...incredible, for me, to watch hunith overhear arthur being legitimately terrible to both merlin and the guy who just died saving merlin AND arthur’s lives, and then to see her come over and start talking about how merlin belongs at arthur’s side, how much merlin needs to be there for him, how they’re two sides of the same coin.  meanwhile, the guy who literally just lied his life away to protect merlin’s secret and who NEVER made merlin feel like he had to hide who he was and who never had any problem with magic in the first place and never made merlin feel unsafe and never treated merlin like he was less of a human being just for existing -

- he’s just burning to ash there, and hunith doesn’t even acknowledge that, despite the fact that merlin is so visibly, intently, single-mindedly focused on that funeral pyre, and so clearly in distress and in pain and NEEDING somebody.  all she can talk about is merlin’s responsibility to arthur.  

the dissonance here is baffling.  hunith has known will forever.  she met arthur less than a week ago.  she barely knows him, and what she does know is that he thinks magic-users are dangerous/evil.  she saw him being a dick to her kid.  she knows her son is having the worst day of his life.  and she still doesn’t offer a single comforting word in reference to the person who just died protecting merlin’s secret, instead choosing to wax poetic about a man whose bigotry is what merlin needed protecting from in the first place.

that...is a hot mess.  the merlin-hunith-will dynamic is one of the few things in this show that reflects less-than-stellarly on hunith’s character, however much i love her.  and even though it all stems from an overwhelming desire to keep her son safe, it doesn’t make her choices any less damaging.  she sends merlin away specifically because she finds out that will knows about his secret.  she spends 1.10 analyzing and encouraging and dissecting merlin’s relationship with arthur, when merlin’s relationship with will is the one that desperately needs attention.  she’s proven wrong about will’s trustworthiness in the most stunning, powerful way possible, and then she never even acknowledges him, instead choosing to laud the dude who literally forces merlin to live in fear of execution.

she’s merlin’s mother.  she’s the only person in his life who knows anything about what will actually meant to him.  she is his only possible resource as he tries to weather a kind of devastation that defies description.  

and she, like arthur, just barrels right on ahead and makes everything about someone else.

the cinematography choices in this scene matter.  whenever arthur or hunith tries to talk to merlin, the camera is placed on the opposite side of the fire from them, meaning the flames are always in the foreground of the frame.  they are something we are required to see and look past before we can get to anything else in the scene.  and in terms of directorial/acting decisions - merlin doesn’t take his eyes off the pyre until the end of his conversation with hunith.  not once while talking to arthur does he look away from it.

the funeral pyre is always in the foreground of the shot, because it’s in the forefront of merlin’s mind.  that is where his focus is right now.  that is what is taking up all of his attention.  that is what is edging into the frame, eating up our entire field of view.  that is what he needs help with.

but he doesn’t get any such support.  the entire sequence ends up revolving around arthur.  will’s entire funeral is about arthur fucking pendragon.  arthur inserts himself so he can talk to merlin about how evil magic is, and then hunith inserts herself so she can talk to merlin about how great arthur is.  nobody ever stops to think that maybe merlin doesn’t want to talk to anybody right this second.  merlin’s entire ‘farewell’ to the only true friend he ever had in his life is completely swallowed up by the prince of camelot, and if that isn’t a metaphor for the rest of merlin’s life, then i don’t know what is.  

i know nobody needs to hear this, because very few people are invested in this kid at the same level of embarrassing detail as me, but here it is, anyway.  

yes, will is prickly.  he’s hard to get on with.  he’s angry.  he’s bitter and snappy and uncharitable, sometimes.

but you know what?  he has every reason to be like that.  

this kid has nobody.  his own best friend’s mother - who has known him all his life - doesn’t trust him and doesn’t respect him.  she is too afraid for her own son’s safety to give will any credit.  she sends merlin away to camelot, the most violently anti-magic place in the world, because apparently, will knowing about merlin’s secret would be even more dangerous than uther pendragon’s genocidal reign.

think about how that would feel.  to hear something like that about yourself.  to be somebody who is already so goddamn alone in the world, and to have your only friend vanish without so much as a ‘see you later,’ and then to be made to feel, however indirectly, like this is somehow your fault, like you’re the liability, like you’re the untrustworthy element here.  as if you, somehow, are more dangerous than a king who literally pays to have sorcerers trafficked to him in cages.

will has every right to be upset, all the time.  he has every reason to be angry, and bitter, and hurt, all the time.  to be thought so poorly of - to be held in such low esteem - when he hasn’t done anything wrong, when he hasn’t ever done anything to earn that kind of mistrust - and to have that same misplaced suspicion used to justify separating him from the only person in the world who gives a damn about him - if it were me, i would be constantly on the verge of screaming, all the time.

will has always been on merlin’s side, and he has never done anything to endanger him, and in the end he gives up everything to make sure merlin can stay safe and hidden and unhunted.  he shouldn’t have needed to prove his goodness, his constancy, his worth; not when he’s already kept merlin’s secret for who knows how many years, but even after he does do so, it doesn’t even matter.  arthur acknowledges him only to disparage sorcery.  hunith passes him over completely in favor of praising arthur, with no acknowledgment of the misjudgment she made.

i have said before that merlin tends to befriend people who have nobody, people who’ve been left behind by the rest of the world, people who’ve been made to feel that they aren’t worthy of love.  and will, merlin’s oldest friend, was the first of those many characters, and it is so heartbreaking to me that in this instance, the same kind of disinterested and careless attitude towards his worth that dogged him all his life is perpetuated and affirmed after his death.  ‘people are used to ignoring him,’ merlin tells arthur, and merlin is right - even when will is dead and burning, arthur only sees sorcery.  hunith, who we would expect to be more sympathetic, only sees arthur.

merlin is the only one who knows better.  merlin has always known better, and he loves will so much, but he is the only one, apparently, and honestly, after will dies?  nobody else even tries to understand.

to sum up:

hunith and arthur, for all that i love them, are both way out of line at the end of this episode.  

the legacy of this experience, for merlin, is that he spends the rest of his life processing this particular trauma alone.  and that is why i always, always have to keep will and ealdor in the back of my mind when i write for merlin in any capacity - because this event isn’t some simple stumbling block for him; it changes him forever.  it teaches him what he can and can’t expect from the people around him, and it solidifies how irrelevant his own needs are when viewed in comparison with arthur’s, even to people who barely even KNOW arthur; people who are supposed to put merlin first over everything.  it teaches merlin to bury his sorrow, and to wrestle with personal suffering in secret, because if things aren’t ultimately about arthur, then they aren’t important enough to be granted any significant amount of time for merlin to deal with.  merlin’s own grief, even at his best friend’s funeral, takes too long to resolve.  arthur walks away from the pyre, and it’s time for merlin to leave, too.  you’d better be going.

bottom line: i don’t care if other people think this whole ‘ooo, everybody wants merlin to be with arthur’ thing is wonderful or beautiful or dreamily romantic.  it isn’t.  it’s ugly, and it’s cruel, and it stripped merlin of his present identity and his future potential, one stolen moment at a time.

[pastelwitchling]

Kyle Valenti Appreciation Week [Day 1]

               “It’s a lot bigger than I thought it’d be,” Alex said, and Kyle smiled.

               He’d spent weeks preparing to go to this doctor’s convention in Albuquerque alone, wondering just how many old men in lab coats he would be forced to listen to discuss the importance of the work they’d done at their bigger, fancier hospitals. Then, on the morning he was getting ready to go, Alex showed up at his doorstep with a backpack and a smirk.

               “Ready to go?”

               Kyle was more than a little grateful. He’d thrown his arms around Alex’s shoulders, making him laugh. The beautiful sound was a good start to what was already beginning to look like a more bearable trip.

               So now they stood before a giant hotel that Kyle was sure was bigger than Roswell’s hospital, ready for five days of lectures and – hopefully – one too many martinis to get through it.

               “Do not leave me alone with these people,” he muttered as the automatic doors let them in, and the cold air conditioning slapped their faces.

               Alex scoffed. “If you hate coming to these things so much, why do you? Couldn’t you just take a sick day or something?”

               “I’m a doctor,” Kyle said miserably. “I’m legally not allowed to be sick.” He mustered a smile as he checked into his room.

               “Oh!” the receptionist smiled at the two of them. Kyle guessed she rarely saw anyone under the age of seventy at one of these things. “Your reservation doesn’t mention a plus-one. I can update you from the two double-sized bedroom to the single king-size, if you want.”

               Kyle glanced at Alex with wide eyes, and was glad to see he wasn’t the only one blushing. Then a ping caught Alex’s attention and he pulled out his phone.

               “Uh – we’re just friends,” Kyle stammered. “We’re not – I mean, he wouldn’t – he is way out of my league –”

               “No,” Alex cut him off, pocketing his phone and smiling politely, if not a little uncomfortably, at the receptionist. “We’re good with the two-bedroom, thanks.”

               Kyle swallowed and nodded, handing in his doctor’s badge and trying (and failing) not to look to Alex every so often, who was doing a great job of avoiding Kyle’s gaze completely. Was it really that bad for people to think they were together? He knew Alex was amazing, he knew he’d made mistakes himself when they were teenagers, but he’d hoped that they’d grown past that. That when someone asked if they were in love, they could laugh it off and take it as a complement.

               Kyle wondered if it was normal to want people to assume you were dating your best friend, then realized he was being spoken to.

               “Thirteenth floor, room 1369,” she said, still looking from Kyle to Alex and back as if too in love to know who to properly stare at.

               “Great,” Kyle said, eager to go. “Thank you.”

               They got onto the elevator with one old woman in the corner who was busying herself with pinning her badge on her lab coat.

               “Forty seconds,” he muttered to Alex who huffed a chuckle. “We’ve been here forty seconds, and I already wish I was dead. Ironic, considering we’re surrounded by doctors.”

               “Relax,” Alex said distractedly, and Kyle just realized how close he was. “You said the first lecture isn’t until tonight, right? So we’ll get to the room, and you can rest up until then.”

               Kyle swallowed. Alex’s breath was warm on the shell of his ear. Was that normal? To like Alex’s breath against his skin? To want to lean back into him to feel more of it?

               He shook his head, shutting his eyes tight. He was exhausted, and being ridiculous. He didn’t want to lean back into Alex – seriously, what was wrong with him today?

               Once they’d reached the tenth floor, the old woman stepped off, and Kyle and Alex were alone. He looked down at his shoes, feigning nonchalance. “Can you believe that receptionist thought we were together?”

               He shrugged a shoulder. “It’s not that hard to believe.”

               “Still,” Kyle said, “I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable.”

               Alex frowned. “Kyle, I’m not –”

               Bing!

               The doors opened to the thirteenth floor, and Kyle nudged his chin. “That’s us.”

               They stepped off and down the carpeted corridor to their room. Kyle used his pass to let them in, and Alex let out a low whistle at the sight. It was a suite, it had to be. The door opened to a large sitting room with Victorian-esque furniture splayed around and flower vases on small wooden tables. There was a large-screen TV hanging on the wall and a small kitchen on the far right, reminding them that they hadn’t, in fact, been transported to the eighteenth century.

               “Wow,” Alex murmured, checking the room on the left. “The beds are in here!” he called. “So’s the bathroom.”

               “Great,” Kyle said, “because I need a shower to wash off the convention from my skin.”

               Alex smiled, and Kyle tried not to think of the pride that bloomed in his chest at the sight of it.

               As he rummaged for a pair of underwear and pajamas from his suitcase, Alex got another ping on his phone. Kyle threw glances at him, and noticed that his smile dimmed before he’d even pulled it out of his pocket.

               Without responding, he clicked it off and tossed it on the bed.

               “Everything okay?”

               Alex hummed, mustering a smile that Kyle had learned long ago meant that he was bothered and trying not to fall into his own mess of thoughts.

               “Hey,” Alex said. “I heard about this cool burger place, just down the street. You want to clean up and go?”

               He groaned. “I’m so in love with you, please don’t ever leave me.”

               Alex laughed, his cheeks red. He plopped down on his bed, arms outstretched. His shirt had ridden up his stomach, and Kyle’s eyes lingered on the tanned patch of naked skin. Alex’s eyes were closed, and he raised his hands to fold under his head, bringing his shirt up more.

               If Kyle asked, would Alex let him touch him there? Would he let Kyle run his hand across his stomach, maybe higher up his shirt? Kyle imagined just lying down beside Alex, Alex looking at him with dark, hungry eyes. Alex reaching up to cup his jaw, caress his cheek, lean in with an open mouth and eager hands. What would Alex do, he wondered, if he just lied beside him and told him; Do whatever you want, I want you to.

               “I don’t know why you complain about these things,” Alex said, yanking Kyle out of his thoughts. “A whole week away from work with a fancy hotel room sounds pretty good after Roswell.”

               “It’s fancy this year,” Kyle said indignant, feeling a weird swell of shame in his chest. Not for the first time, Kyle was glad Alex didn’t have Isobel’s mind-reading powers. “You weren’t here when they put us in motels.”

               “We could’ve had fun in a motel.”

               “It’s a motel,” Kyle deadpanned. “There only thing you can do there for fun is . . .”

               Alex raised a brow. “Have sex?”

               Heat rose to the tips of Kyle’s ears and he cleared his throat. “Could you imagine . . . if – if we’d been there . . . together? Last year?”

               Alex said nothing for a long while, and Kyle didn’t dare look at him. Then he heard Alex sit up in bed.

               “Kyle –” he started, his voice strange, then –

               Ping!

               Alex turned silent, and Kyle looked over at him to see him focused on his phone, his finger hovering over the screen. Finally, Alex swallowed and pocketed it.

               “You okay?”

               Alex slid off the bed. “Yeah. I’ll go ask what time the meals are in this place,” he said. “You should get cleaned up.”

               He patted Kyle’s shoulder twice on his way out, and Kyle watched him leave. The second he was out the door, Kyle threw his face into his pillow and cursed himself.

               What had he said? What had he been thinking?! Alex was going to think he was hitting on him, pushing himself on his gay friend because he was bored!

               “Idiot!” he yelled, his voice muffled. “What were you thinking, what’s wrong with you?!”

               The empty hotel room didn’t respond.

                 As they sat over their burgers and fries, Kyle thought Alex was unusually quiet. Every time he tried to make him laugh, Alex would get a call or text, and his smile would instantly fall away.

               “I’m really glad you’re here,” he tried. “There’s no way I could’ve made it through this week without you.”

               “Week hasn’t started yet,” Alex reminded him, rational and calculating as always. Kyle smiled to himself.

               “Why’d you decide to come anyway?”

               Alex folded his arms on the table and sighed. He looked a lot more tired than he had that morning, but he smiled, nonetheless. “I didn’t want you to be alone.”

               Kyle’s heart fluttered in his chest. “Alex –”

               Ping!

               Alex shut his away, his smile faded. “Sorry, just – just one second.” He pulled out his phone, checked the message on the screen with furrowed brows, seemed to hesitate about something, then swiped across his screen and fell silent again.

               It was when they were nursing their milkshakes, Alex mindlessly swirling a fry in his, that Kyle couldn’t take it anymore.

               “Okay,” he finally said, “what’s going on with you? I’m the one that’s supposed to be miserable on this trip, remember?”

               Alex blinked. “Nothing’s going on.”

               “Alex,” Kyle said. “It’s me.”

               Alex said nothing a moment, then another text came, and he all but flinched. Kyle frowned. There was only one person who could give Alex that kind of reaction.

               His shoulders fell. “It’s Guerin, isn’t it?” he said. “He’s the one that’s been calling nonstop.”

               Alex shut his eyes and sighed. He ran a hand through his hair, and said, “I don’t know why I can’t talk to him. Not now, I –” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I thought I could get over . . . the whole thing with Maria, but I . . . I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

               “Why didn’t you tell me?”

               He shook his head, and managed a smile. “Because I don’t understand what’s happening either. I don’t get why it’s suddenly . . . bothering me so much. And because this trip isn’t about that. This is about you, so let’s just table Guerin until some of this starts to make more sense, okay?”

               Kyle stared. He’d spent years watching Alex put his own feelings aside because everyone else was just that much more important. He’d seen Alex ignore his own tears so he could wipe away Kyle’s, he’d seen him bleed for Michael over and over.

               “You know,” he said, “back in high school, when I first started to become someone I’m not proud of –”

               Alex frowned. “What – why are you bringing that up now?”

               “You didn’t hate me for it at first,” Kyle went on. “Even when I didn’t invite you to parties, even when I told people that I didn’t really know you, even when . . . when I called you things behind your back –”

               “Stop,” Alex shut his eyes, “I don’t want to talk about that.”

               “You have to,” Kyle insisted, leaning in and taking Alex’s hand. “Because even after all of that, you wanted to see the good in me, and only the good. And then, when I stopped talking behind your back, and said all that messed up crap to your face, then you started to get angry. You put me in my place, every time. You give people chances, Alex. That doesn’t mean you don’t know how to punish them.”

               Alex stared at his milkshake. “What’s your point?”

               “That I got mine,” he said, and shrugged a shoulder, smiling. “And Guerin’s about to get his. It’s okay, Alex. You’re okay.”

               Alex stared at him a long while, then a smile tugged at his lips. “You were wrong, you know,” he said softly. “You’re the one that’s out of my league.”

               Kyle blinked, and realized he’d leaned in impossibly close. He cleared his throat, sitting back, his face inexplicably warm.

               “Manes,” he murmured, shaking his head. “This’ll be one hell of a week.”

               As he watched Alex bite his lower lip to keep his smile from widening, his face a cute shade of pink, he realized this trip might not be as bad as he’d thought.

[blackqueenstarseed1]

The Friend

Chapter one - Fall out

Paring -  Rafael Casal x black!reader AU

Summary - You've been in love with one of your best friends for years, you've actually agreed to reveal your feelings to Daveed, but what happens when you find out he's got a new girlfriend. Will his best blonde-haired pal be the one you've always been waiting for?

Warnings - slight angst, heartbreak, Alcohol

Word count : 2,274

Note: Let me know your thoughts please. I love Rafael, and he needs more love on here. 

I’m also making a tag list, let me know if you want to be apart of it.

“Not that dress it’s giving grandma vibes.”, your roommate Jamie said leaning against the doorway to your bedroom. As she nodded towards your floral dress that was in your hands. 

“Well help me find something, I wanna make sure he noticed me this time.” You mumbled closing your eyes imagining his beautiful brown eyes that can warm an entire room. And that smile, oh that fucking smile that felt as pure as the source of light. Returning back to reality you signed, “I’m gonna tell him how I feel tonight, and  I- I want it to be special. You know?”

Jamie raised her brown, walked towards your bed, and took a seat next to you. Staring you in the eye giving you her concerned motherly look, oh here she goes, you thought not wanting to hear another lecture, especially with your nerves today. “Listen y/n, no matter what happens tonight just know that you don’t need some guy to be happy okay? Daveed is an idiot if he doesn’t see how much of a wonderful person you are.”

That was his name Daveed, Daveed Daniele Diggs, and you were in love with him since you first met at freshman orientation which was five years ago. You wanted to tell him how you felt, but he was in a long-term relationship with a girl named Lisa. But about three months ago he learned that she was cheating on him for over 4 years. You honestly felt bad at how happy you were at the news, throwing yourself a little party at some misdeeds. No, really you actually did throw a little party, from buying a mini cake, and jumping up and down as ‘lovely day’ by bill withers played through the stereo. Pathetic. With that, you decided to give him time to heal before you tell him that you were helplessly in love with him. Three months should be good enough you mused.

“Yea, yea I get it. Love myself before someone else. I didn’t ask for a Ted talk, but okay.” You replied getting up from your seat, throwing the dress back in the closet. “Now help me find something to wear. Let me see if that fashion degree was worth it?”

Jamie chuckled, shaking her head at you. Walking into your closet she nodded, “sure.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your stomach was beginning to do circles as you and Jamie arrived at the party. It’s okay you can do this ...after some drinks… but no I should stay sober for this.

“Y/n! Jamie! Come and take a shot with me.” Oak yelled, walking towards the pair of you with two shot glasses in his hands. As he came up to the both of you his eyes went wide as he looked at you up and down inspecting your outfit. “Damn y/n, you look ummm, y-you look, I-I mean wow.”

You nodded with a satisfied smile on your face. I hope Daveed likes this too. “Thanks, oak, and no thank you I’m the DD tonight.”

“Cool, cool. Well, I’m over there if you need me.” He winked and walked towards a group of guys.

“Hey wait, I never said that I didn’t want one,” Jamie yelled frowning as Oak walked away selectively not hearing her plea. Turning towards you with a knowing smirk on her face, she shook her head. “See I told you bitch. You’re  fucking hot.”

“Oak flirts with anything that moves, that was nothing.” You mumbled, rolling your eyes. It was true though, you loved Oak to death but if you had a penny for every compliment he gave to anyone you’d be a trillionaire.

“True but- Oh fuck look who just arrived. Twelve o’clock your way.” Jamie mumbled and nodded her head towards the front door. Slowly looking up your heart began to beat fast, increasing in an unhealthy way. Daveed walked in the room like the goddess that he was, dressed to the gods, hair moisturized to the lords. He waved at people nearby as he walked further through the party getting closer to you. Jamie squeezed your shoulder, giving you a warm smile. “Do it now, so you’ll have the rest of the night to drink the pain away.”

You nodded not being able to reply as Daveed walked up to you.

“Hey! Y/n, Jamie. It’s good to see you both.” He said with his beautiful eye smile lighting up the room giving Jamie a side hug. Pulling you into a warm hug looking you up, and down biting his lips. “What’s been going on with you? I felt like we haven’t talked in years!”

“Oh, y'know works have been pulling me in all areas.” You replied, wishing you had taken the shot Oak had offered you earlier. Liquid courage can be a good thing. Gathering the little courage you had you shot him a smile, “Actually I been wanting to talk to you about something-“

“Thanks, diggs for the correct directions. I really appreciate it. If you haven’t noticed I’m being sarcastic.” A voice yelps in the near distance interrupting your plan to drag Daveed away, to confess your love for him. Balling your fists trying to keep your cool, looking up trying to see who was brave enough to interrupt a girl so helplessly in love. Wearing a yellow ‘Oakland’ hoodie, with glasses on, walking towards you with a girl walking beside him, you signed as you made the person out. Rafael Santiago motherfucking Casal, great, now you didn’t hate him per se but you greatly dislike his white ass. From disagreeing on everything, arguing over stupid shit, him teasing, and poking fun at you every chance he got on you. Let’s just say you two weren’t exactly close. Walking up to the three of you he smiled, “ Hey, Jamie. I love ya man, but never ask me for a favor if you can’t cooperate okay.”

The fuck did he just ignore me. You thought saying a silent prayer in your head trying not to go off on his ass.

“Sorry, my phone went dead once I realized I gave y’all the wrong direction,” Daveed mumbled, shrugging his shoulders, reaching his hands out to the girl who arrived with Rafael. What? Who is she? “ Guys I want y’all to meet my girlfriend Serena.”

At that moment you could’ve sworn that the entire room can hear your heart-shattering in millions of pieces. After all this time of pinning after a guy, you always cared for giving your every thought to, but in reality, he will never give you the time of day. Fuck I’m a desperate piece of mess you thought feeling your throat getting hard. Fuck don’t cry you weak bitch. Jamie looked up in surprise, her eyes instantly falling on you shooting you a sympathetic look. But no you weren’t gonna be a bitter bitch just because someone wasn’t into you, you were better than that. Putting all of your feelings aside you nod. “Nice to meet you I’m, y/n, and that’s Jamie.”

“You too. Oh my god, I love your outfit, it's beautiful.” She smiled, making Daveed grin as he pulled her into a side hug, happy that she was getting along with his friends. Mumbling a small ‘thanks’, you felt defeated, not only was she pretty, but she was nice too. You couldn’t even hate her if you tried, at least his last girlfriend Lisa was a total bitch, something that your whole friend group silently thought as well. Which was good because it didn’t make you feel guilty for your feelings for Daveed because you had a villain in your love story. Kissing her cheek making her giggle, Daveed smiled and looked up at you. “So what were you trying to tell me earlier?”

“Oh, um it was nothing. Just forget it. Listen I should go see everyone else.” You rasped, pointing towards an area of the house far away from them. “It was good seeing you all.”

 “Okay, well don’t be a stranger.” Daveed frown noticing the change in your state, just a minute ago you were on cloud nine. Serena waved bye at you. While Jamie stared at you squinting her eyes, silently asking if you needed her, you shook your head no. Rafael glanced up looking away from his phone for a moment and mumbled. “See ya.”

Oh? so he did know that I was here, fucking bitch.

Grabbing a bottle of vodka on your way out towards the pool area, you found a place farther away from any eyes. You began to take a gulp from the bottle. “Fuck.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I guess I don’t need this.” You laughed fully drunk after finishing almost half the bottle of vodka. Standing by the pool with the letter you wrote Daveed in your right hands, and a lighter in your left trying to burn your feelings away. Maybe it was because you were drunk off your ass, or maybe the lighter was cheap as hell. But It wouldn’t work no matter how much you flick the little rolling thingy. “Fuck can something work for me for once. DAMN IT!”

“Hey what the fuck y/n! Are you trying to burn the house down?” Rafael yelled running up to you snatching the lighter from your hands. Making you jump in surprise, him coming out of nowhere throwing you off, so much so that you slipped on a puddle of water nearby. Feeling gravity defy you, You gasped “Shit.”

But before you could even fall into the pool, you felt warm arms around you. Looking up into the eyes of the person who saved you from embarrassment. You tilted your head, eyebrows furrowed, confused as to why the guy who hated your entire existence decided to save you from humiliation. Rafael’s expression hardened. “Are you insane? What if you would’ve gotten hurt?.”

“Please, stop yelling. My head hurts, and the room is spinning.” You whined, placing your hand on your forehead trying to block any more noise, coming your way. You didn’t need someone, especially him, making you feel guilty for drinking your feelings away. Because you weren’t in the mood right now. Shoving the letter back into your purse you glared at the blonde man, 

“Leave me alone.”

“There’s no way I’m gonna leave you in this state. I mean look you can barely walk.” Rafael proclaimed pulling your arm sitting you down on a nearby bench. “Stay here.”

He walked back into the house as you sat there with a dumbfounded look not believing that he was actually trying to help you at this low point. Coming back towards you he hands you a bottle of water. “Drink this.”

Squinting your eyes at him wondering if this was a setup and if he poisoned the water. You decided to take the risk, and grabbed the water from him and mumbled a small  ‘thanks’ as you gulped down the water. Rafael nodded watching you finish the water pleased with your compliance. “You good?”

“Yes. Thanks,” you replied, playing with the top of the bottle trying to avoid any eye contact with this confusing man.

“Ain’t that’s what friends are for?” He mused, staring into your eyes with his beautiful eyes. You always thought that Rafa was a handsome man, especially with his way with words, and his wisdom was simply out of this world. And your attraction to him never fully went away, especially after your altercations. But just because you think he’s cute doesn’t mean you’ll go out with him, he’s still Rafael the guy who gave you hell. Peering up at him leaning further into the bench you replied. “Friends?”

“Yes, friends. What?” Rafael questioned eyebrows raised at your statement.

“I’m just saying I never consider you a friend, and I’m pretty sure you would say the same too.” You confessed not caring how honest you were being. Liquid courage 1, sober 0.

“Ouch.” Rafael chuckled, as he jammed his hands in his front pocket. 

“I’m serious Raf, for as long as I can remember. You couldn’t stand to be in the same room as me, and now you wanna help me. What’s your deal? Huh.” You demanded crossing your arms, glaring at him. Wanting him to stop playing games with you.

“That’s not even remotely true! I-I, look listen to me when I say this. I know pain when I see it, and it’s written all over your face. I just want to make sure you don’t do anything stupid. Okay.” Rafael answered threading a hand through his hair, his lashes fluttering. Staring deep into your soul, bringing an unfamiliar sense of comfort to you. Damn he really is serious

“Thanks, but I’m fine. And I don’t need you to check on me.” You argue, looking away from his intense stare. Rafael huffed, shaking his head in return. “Sure.”

Sitting in silence for a few minutes Rafael stood up from his seat and jerked his head in the direction of the back exit. “This party is getting pretty boring. You wanna go grab something to eat.” 

You honestly didn’t know what to make of his sudden interest in you. For the longest time, the only attention he has ever given you was to either say something rude, or correct you. This was definitely weird, yes, but you were too drunk and too hurt to care right now. Glancing up towards the house seeing Daveed with his arm around Serena. You frown, tearing your eyes away from the man who still had your heart. Standing up, throwing the water bottle by a nearby bush, you nodded. “Let’s go.”

[angst-fairygodmother]

Grief (Ben Hargreeves x Reader)

A/N: I’m not really sure where this came from. But it’s pretty angsty and kinda cheesy. Just a long conversation with a medium, and a ghost, about things that might have been. Word Count: 1378 Rating: T - Discussion of death, reference to dead parent

“Is this how you’ve felt all these years?” Klaus asked, hugging one of the throw pillows to his chest. “Oh god, I’m so sorry.”

You looked at him sadly, nodding softly. He had just told you about his time in Vietnam, about Dave, and your heart ached for him.

“How do you do it?”

“You hold onto the happy memories and the time you had with them. You take deep breaths and you let yourself be sad sometimes, but you don’t let it drown you. I wish I could say it gets better but it doesn’t. You just find a way to keep moving forward and you get used to the pain; if it ever goes away I haven’t found that point yet.”

You stared up at the ceiling, fighting back tears. “And I don’t know if this helps, but at least you had the time with him, you told him how you felt.”

“I think your mom knew how you felt about her…?” his confusion was palpable.

“Oh, you meant her…well that’s a different kind of grief.”

“Wait, if you didn’t think I was talking about losing your mom, who did you think I was…?”

You laughed incredulously, stopping quickly when you realized he really didn’t know.

“Klaus, I was hopelessly in love with your brother for years. I just didn’t think it was worth risking our friendship or making things weird with the rest of you to say anything. Biggest regret of my life, even if it probably wouldn’t have ever been something.”

“Why do you think it wouldn’t have been anything?”

You didn’t know it, but Klaus was staring at his brother’s stunned face over your shoulder.

“I wasn’t exactly subtle. I mean even Luther noticed my stupid crush,” you shrugged. “I’m sure Ben ignored it in order to spare my feelings.”

There were few times Klaus truly hated his powers more than as he watched his brother reach out to you, knowing that he would pass right through and you wouldn’t even notice.

“Oh I don’t know, Y/N,” he said, hoping the ache in his voice was easy to write off as more of his general mood since returning to the present. “Ben was always shy. And never really thought much of himself, so he probably wouldn’t have ever guessed that you, or anybody, had a crush on him.”

You smiled bitterly, eyes stinging with tears. “Don’t, Klaus. It doesn’t help anybody to give me hope now. It just…hurts more.”

“I still see him sometimes,” Klaus admitted, withholding the fact that it was near constant and that Ben was a silent participant in your current conversation. “A lot actually. I could ask him, or give him a message or something, if you wanted.”

You shrugged, smiling softly despite the tears running down you cheeks unchecked. “I don’t even know what I’d say. Other than I miss him. Some days more than others…” You looked down, fiddling absently with your fingers. “It’s stupid, but I used to write him letters, whenever I saw something that reminded me of him or did something I wish I could have shared…”

Ben frowned, opening his mouth to speak, and Klaus shook his head softly, a warning that now wasn’t the right time, to let you finish baring your soul first.

“And my first night alone here in the apartment, surrounded in boxes and sitting on the floor because I hadn’t gotten the couch delivered yet, I tried to imagine him here too, like it was our place. We always talked about running away together, when things at the Academy were bad…”

“I think little touches of him made his way here anyway,” Klaus said softly, indicating the shelf full of the sorts of things Ben used to read all the time and talk to you about, even when you didn’t understand what he was saying, framed by curled tentacles.

You chuckled. “I got those bookends as a joke at a flea market.”

Ben was staring at the shelf. You had found copies of every one of his favorite books, and a few others that he hadn’t read but probably would have enjoyed. He reached up, trailing an incorporeal finger over the swirl shape of one of the plaster carvings.

“I like it,” he said softly.

“I thought maybe having things that reminded me of him would make it hurt less, you know, make it feel more like he was going to walk in any time and prop his feet on the coffee table and apologize for being gone for so long. And it’s stupid. There’s no reason for it. We were only ever friends, and dumb kids promising all the things dumb kids say before they really understand how the world works.”

You rubbed your hands over your face, trying to brush away the tears and the grief that were settling in there.

“I’m sorry Klaus,” you said, reaching out to take his hand comfortingly, watching the other fiddle with the dogtags around his neck as he stared into seemingly empty space. “I didn’t mean to derail the conversation.”

He jumped slightly at your touch, turning back to you with an apologetic look in his big, sad green eyes.

“No! No it’s fine,” he reassured you. “I don’t even know what to say about Dave. So listening to you talk about Ben…”

He swallowed guiltily as the pain he was probably causing you both dawned on him again. He took a deep breath to steady himself, closing his eyes to ignore the frantic gestures of his brother’s ghost.

“He’s here you know,” he offered finally, so quiet you barely heard him.

Your heart lurched. “Ben is here? For how long?”

“He’s been following me around like a Jiminy Cricket for years honestly. All the booze and drugs in the world haven’t been able to get rid of him.”

“Why…why didn’t you say anything?”

He shrugged. “I guess I never thought about it. Everyone seemed to be able to move on so I thought it would make things worse. If anyone even believed me, which they never do.”

“So if he’s here, and he’s been here, then he heard all of that…?” you bit your lip as a fresh wave of tears threatened, these ones mixing shame with the sadness, knowing that you had just accidentally spilled everything you had kept secret for all these years to the very person they were about.

“Klaus, you moron!” Ben shouted at him, making him wince. “If you weren’t going to say anything at the beginning, why would you say something now! It’s going to make things so much worse!”

“He’s sort of pissed at me for springing this on you now, and he says he likes the bookends…”

A small giggle bubbled up in your throat as you imagined Ben standing there, lecturing Klaus, as he frequently had during your youth. You could tell by Klaus’s facial expressions that they were now getting into a rather heated argument, and you stayed still, a silent witness to it, and tried to imagine your best friend’s face in the air beside your couch.

“I’m not telling them that!” Klaus whined. “That’ll make them cry again. Do you want to make them cry Ben?”

“What are you not telling me, Klaus?” you whispered.

Klaus clamped his jaw shut as he argued internally with himself as much as externally with Ben. Finally he sighed.

“Ben says that he’s…always loved you and always will. And that seeing you grow up and live your life and be happy is the best thing about being a ghost. He just wishes he could have been here to do it beside you.”

Your breath hitched, more tears spring to your eyes and coursing down your cheeks.

“But he also doesn’t want you to dwell so much on him. That time has passed, and you should…move on and find something present instead of being stuck on things that never got to be.”

“I…I don’t know if I can.”

“Ben says you can,” Klaus shrugged, wrapping you in his arms. “And I believe in you too.”

Unseen or felt by you, Ben did his best to join the hug, his own tears dripping into nothingness where they should have fallen in your hair.

[imagine-that]

AN: MY SPEEDY SOFTIE!!! I’m in love with Pietro and this is after AOU because I’m in denial that he’s actually dead :))

With a lot of struggle, you carried the mountain of debriefings, reports and other paperwork Tony had given you into the elevator, holding your pen between your teeth as you reach over to press the button to get to your floor.

“Lady y/n, allow me to help you with that.” Thor says as he gets in alongside you.

You try to smile appreciatively but it’s pretty hard for him to see behind the stack of papers. He takes the top half of it off and holds it for you, making you sigh in relief.

You let the pen fall onto the remaining papers so you can speak.

“Thanks Thor. That was much needed.” You say, smiling a bit.

So far during your internship, you’d managed to become friends with almost every Avenger in the tower. You’d even gotten Thor to share his pop tarts with you, which wasn’t something anyone else could say for themselves.

Though you technically worked for all of them, it was usually Tony who gave you your work and directions and such. Sometimes on occasion it was also Cap or Nat but it was a rare occurrence.

He smiles back and you ride up to the floor, stepping out into the living room.

You set down your stack, taking the rest from Thor and thanking him again as you bring them over to the coffee table.

Whether he leaves or not, you hardly notice as you bury yourself into your work, looking through every last paper you were given.

Though Tony liked you, he didn’t go easy on you with the workload. He knew you didn’t want him to. You wanted to prove your worth and earn the internship he’d given you when he’d decided to work the fake internship he talked to May about into a real thing, not get a light workload because you were well liked.

You’re so busy and nose deep that Nat and Steve have to continually pass by and make sure you eat. They practically shove pop tarts and water down your throat while you read through everything in front of you.

“Eat y/l/n. I may be old school but I do know for a fact you still need to eat to live. Humans aren’t THAT evolved yet.” Steve jokes at one point as he hands you a plate of food.

You smile a bit, taking the plate without looking up and murmuring your thanks as you stuff your face, eyes never leaving the work in front of you.

As the day goes on, you hardly move from your spot, highlighting and making notes on the reports before neatly organizing them the way Tony had instructed you to.

By the time the sun has long since set and almost everyone has already gone to bed, you’re exhausted but still forcing your eyes to stay open and finish the handful you had left.

Bucky, who you presume to be the last Avenger still awake, silently walks towards you and places a cup of tea in front of you.

You look up at him for a second, blinking a bit in shock.

“It’ll help you get to sleep. Believe me.” He explains quietly before heading off towards his room before you get the chance to thank him.

You take slow sips of the tea, savouring it as you work you way through the remainder of the papers, ignoring your drooping eyelids.

As you reach the last few reports, a breeze comes flying past you, sending the papers fluttering to the ground and snapping you awake.

“What the hell?” You ask groggily, looking around for a second.

You jump in surprise when you see Pietro sitting on the sofa above you.

“Jesus Pietro you scared me.” You squeak, reaching over to grab one of the papers.

Of all the Avengers you’d met, and that was most of them, Pietro was about the only one you hadn’t really befriended.

His sister was one of your best friends since you’d started working there but Pietro, on the other hand, didn’t seem to like you very much. He often commented on how ridiculous working for Tony was and that he was a killer and so on and so on.

You’d learnt to ignore it, often far too busy working to listen to his rants anyway.

“He works you very hard y/n. You should go to bed. Finish those in the morning.” He says calmly, ignoring your near heart attack.

“What?” You ask, puzzled by his sudden change in behaviour.

“You’re practically asleep already.” He remarks, looking at you with concern in his bright blue eyes.

“No I’m not. I was just resting my eyes.” You argue, yawning a little against your will as you speak.

“Mhm.” He says doubtfully, raising an eyebrow.

You ignore him, turning back to your work. He rolls his eyes slightly at your stubborn nature.

Again, a gust of wind blows past, taking your work with it.

“Pietro!” You groan, looking around for him.

Suddenly the papers are being dangled above your head, tickling your nose.

“Hello Princessa.” He says teasingly, his accent making the words sound even more attractive than they already would have.

“Maximoff, I’m trying to work.” You whine, pouting up at him and trying to ignore the red in your face at the nickname.

“You work too hard.” He lectures.

“Why do you care? I thought you didn’t like me?” You ask curiously.

He scoffs. “Don’t be silly. I don’t like your boss, you aren’t him. It definitely is not you I don’t like.” He says as he sits back down, reluctantly handing the papers back.

You nod to show you heard him but return to your work anyway, taking another few sips of the tea in front of you to try and distract the small feeling of happiness at his insistence that he does in fact like you.

The two of you sit in silence, you doing your job and Pietro observing you as you go.

“You don’t have to stay up on my account. I’m used to being the last one out here.” You inform him, not looking up from the last’s of your work.

He hums in response but makes no effort to move, still staying comfortably in the same spot.

You shrug to yourself, refocusing and trying to ignore the goofy smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

A few moments later you’ve reached the last two pages but your eyes are shutting, too tired to read anymore.

Forgetting you’re not alone, you let your head rest on the tabletop, your body hunched over sleepily.

As you begin to doze off, you feel a pair of arms wrap around your torso, scooping you up bridal style.

Before you have the chance to register what’s happening, you’re in your room, your arms wrapped tightly around Pietros neck.

You blink up at him, unsure what to say.

“How did you get into my room?” Is the first question that comes to mind.

He chuckles a bit, shaking his head of icy blond coloured hair.

“Do not worry about that Y/n. Rest.” He orders, setting you down gently on your bed.

“Pietro I need to finish!” You say stubbornly, looking up at him with a small pout.

“You need to sleep.” He counters and you sigh, letting your head hit the pillow behind you.

“If I don’t finish that paperwork, I could lose this internship.” You tell him.

“And if you don’t sleep you could die or get sick. A lot more important than the internship.” He quips back, smiling at you amusedly.

You groan in response, snuggling yourself into the bed. He races over to the other side of the room and back in less than a second, placing a blanket over you and tucking your hair gently behind your ear.

“Thank you Pietro.” You murmur with a lazy smile.

He smiles at the sound of his name from your lips and nods, walking towards the door.

“Goodnight speedy.” You say with a giggle, your eyes closed.

In a nanosecond, he’s back at your side and places a kiss on your lips sweetly. Your eyes shoot open in surprise but you do kiss back happily.

“Bet you didn’t see that coming.” He teases, smiling down at you.

You giggle as he takes the back of your head carefully in his hand, resting it back down onto the pillow.

“Goodnight you stubborn stubborn girl/boy/person.” He whispers back.

You let your eyes close blissfully, drifting off to sleep and dreaming of a certain Sokovian as he shuts off the light and slips out of your room, your work long forgotten.

[hopecountysfavhoe]

‘Cold’ Chapter Sixteen Pt.2

Rating 18+

Word count: 3,379

It was a quiet day for Jacob. He was back at the Veterans Centre after taking a 'hunting trip' to Holland Valley. He knew that he wasn't really supposed to butt in on what was happening over in John's region but he had to do something. He'd gotten word that the Deputy was spotted in Holland Valley in a truck with Kim Rye and it was just too perfect.

So he told his people he was going on a quick hunting trip and took a Bliss bullet with him. He had followed the Deputy's truck to Nick and Kim Rye's house, waiting patiently for her to leave like he knew she would. If he knew anything about the Deputy it was that she couldn't sit in one place for too long.

When she went to meet up with Grace Armstrong he kept his distance. He knew Grace was a good sniper but he was better at hiding. It was a pretty easy shot, the Deputy's neck was exposed and she was walking pretty slowly. Jacob smirked at her comfort. She had gotten relaxed, too relaxed. He had to send her a message and a Bliss bullet was the perfect one.

When he hit her, Jacob watched through his scope as the Deputy fell to the ground. He was careful to hide his scope and gun barrel when Grace scanned the area. He watched Grace as she practically carried the Deputy to her truck. It was amusing to say the least, watching the Deputy be so fragile with the people that 'cared' about her.

He still wasn't convinced that the people of Hope County cared about the Deputy the way she'd convinced herself they did. She was a weapon to them, a tool they used to help better the Resistance. But as soon as she breaks beyond fixing they'll toss her aside and find someone new, and that's when Eden's Gate will be there to pick her up.

Jacob didn't know why he cared, it wasn't like the Deputy had ever treated him with kindness. Except in that cabin... but that must have been her plan, to feed him lies and tend his wounds, make him feel bad for her and her past. God, what was wrong with him? The Deputy wasn't capable of something that cruel, that manipulative...was she?

Jacob doubted it. He'd watched her in the trials and on his cameras, if she ever felt like being cruel she would just outright be cruel. She would kill his hunters and Judges but she was straightforward about it, she didn't play mind games. It was annoying to spend so much time obsessing over the Deputy's behaviour but Jacob couldn't stop, it was too intriguing.

Everyone he'd encountered in Hope County was fighting for something or someone, but the Deputy had no connection to this place. She didn't grow up here, she didn't have family or a house that she had to protect, she just fought them because she was asked to. It was a respectable way of acting, if only she wasn't on the opposite side. Jacob could only imagine what he could get done if he had the Deputy fighting for him. She'd be unstoppable, probably to a fault, to her death.

These were all things he mulled over as he backed into the woods, making his escape back to his own region. He didn't tell John about him being there, he didn't need the lecture about John being able to govern his own region without interference again. So he just found his truck again and got back the the Whitetail Mountains as quick as possible.

Jacob wanted to feel pleased with himself. He managed to get a swipe at the 'untouchable' Deputy, that was a major achievement. But still, his stomach churned at the thought of the Deputy being in the hands of those people. He knew Grace was smart enough to drive around the valley to get any potential followers off her trail so that meant the Deputy was probably slumped over in the back seat of some pickup truck, unable to react to anything or protect herself. It should have brought him pleasure, the thought of the Deputy incapacitated by his own hands, but instead it brought him worry. It was worry he didn't want so he tried to shrug it off and focus on his men's training.

Everything was quiet, the men were training, Jacob had just finished overviewing another trial, it was an average day. But while Jacob was sitting at his desk in his upstairs office he heard chaos erupt outside. His guards started yelling about an attack, causing Jacob to jump to his feet. He went to his window and looked down on the front yard. Guards and other trainees were running around in panic, their guns pointed all over the place.

Jacob rushed downstairs and realized what brought the chaos on. The guard on his front step had an arrow in his neck and was dead. Jacob barked and order to find whoever did this, even though he had a pretty good idea. If it was an arrow it must have been that Jess Black kid, she had a lot of gall antagonizing Jacob in his own home. Around the arrow was a paper note, now splattered with blood. Jacob untied the note from the arrow and quickly unfolded it to read it.

We need to talk. Now.

Meet me at the Flanagan cabin tomorrow at noon, alone. No guns, no weapons, just a talk.

-You know who

Jacob cursed and ordered his men to tighten the perimeter, the Deputy just taunted him and he didn't like it.

The Deputy drove down a dirt road and parked next to a tall tree. She was alone and was about to meet Jacob Seed for a talk. She just hoped he would show up and not blow her off. The Deputy knew that shooting one of his guards with an arrow that had a note on it telling him to go meet her in the woods was probably the least smart thing she could do but she was fuming the day before.

Before she could head up to the cabin, the Deputy remembered the rules she made and set her weapons in the passenger seat of her truck. She knew not to go into the woods completely unarmed though so she kept her knife and a pistol tucked into her waist band behind her back. She was a little nervous, the last time she was alone with Jacob was in that room after he forced her into another trial. Even so, she was filled with anger towards him so that helped a little bit.

After putting away her guns the Deputy started up the hill to the Flanagan cabin, praying that Jacob actually listened to the 'alone' part of her note. When she made it up the impossibly steep hill followed with a thirty minute hike through the forest she came upon a shocking discovery. The Flanagan cabin had been burnt down.

It wasn't too recent, the fire was probably a couple weeks before then. The Deputy didn't know who would burn it down or why but at least it was uninhabited.

She walked over to the driveway and waited, she checked her watch for the time. It was 11:57, Jacob should be there soon. The Deputy was uncomfortable to say the very least. In a show of good faith to her 'no weapons' rule she had also elected to leave her bulletproof vest in the truck. So now she only had a pistol and a hunting knife, no vest, no rifle, and she wasn't even fully convinced Jacob would show up alone, or even show up for that matter.

She decided to give it until 12 o'clock precisely for Jacob to show up, if he wasn't there by then she was going to get the hell out of there before she got trapped and kidnapped or something. She folded her arms over her chest, trying not to fidget incase Jacob was watching her.

While three minutes clicked by as slow as they possibly could, the Deputy rethought her whole plan. She didn't think Jacob would actually show up, she was also worried he would but that he would bring his whole damn army with him. Part of her wondered if this was his plan, doing something to provoke her then make her make him agree to a weapons free meeting so that he could take her without too much of a fight. It wasn't as unlikely as she hoped it would sound.

She looked at her watch and saw that it was 12:00. She scanned the woods for Jacob, her heart pounding in her ears while she tried to remain calm. She swore she saw something move in the tree line and stared, waiting to see if it was her imagination or if it was actually something. She watched intently but didn't see anything move. The Deputy kept scanning the tree line when she saw it. Jacob Seed came waltzing out of the trees, holding the still bloody arrow in his hands.

He looked up at the impatient Deputy with her arms crossed. He let out a throaty chuckle. "Didn't think I'd make it?" He asked nonchalantly and continued to study the arrow in his hands.

"What makes you think that?" The Deputy fired back, but she knew she radiated a certain worried energy.

Jacob shrugged and looked up at her. He held the arrow up as if he needed to see it better in the sun. "So...you think shooting my guard is the best you can do?" Jacob slowly slinked towards her as if they weren't in a neutral area, as if she was tied down to his chair and waiting for him to pull out that music box.

"I do think it was one of my better revenge plans." The Deputy hissed. "Did you follow the rules? No weapons?" The Deputy asked and glanced down at his hip holster for his knife.

Jacob stopped approaching her when he was about 6-7 feet away from her. She could read his body language and tell that he was furious, even if he did do a good job at hiding it. "I was going to but you can never be too careful, can you, Deputy?" He said the word 'Deputy' as if it were poison. He motioned with the tip of the arrow to her belt holster for the Deputy's own hunting knife.

"So, are we alone?" The Deputy asked, trying to see if Jacob was too obviously lying.

"You're instructions were clear, alone. Did you follow the rules as well?" Jacob asked and the Deputy pursed her lips together.

Jacob's crystal blue eyes bored into the Deputy's as she reached down for her radio. She unhooked it from her belt and raised it to her mouth. "Stand down guys, it's ok." She said into the radio and waited for a response.

The radio was silent until it crackled to life. "Are you serious, Dep?" Grace's voice asked through the radio.

"Yes I am, Jacob and I are talking."

"Ok, but I'll be watching." Grace's tone sounded more like a threat than a reassurance. The Deputy hooked her radio back onto her belt while Jacob fought back a grin.

"The rule maker doesn't even follow her own rules, impressive." Jacob gloated and the Deputy refolded her arms.

"Now tell your guys to stand down, this talk is supposed to be peaceful." The Deputy spat and Jacob made a deep humming noise.

"Stand down men, me and the Deputy are having a talk." He said into his own radio and waited for an answer.

"Roger that, sir." An obedient voice returned on the radio. Jacob slid his radio back into his pocket and faced the Deputy again.

The tension in the air was so thick it could stop a bullet. The Deputy wanted to go first. "Ok, now that we're as good as alone, you and I need to chat."

"I'm waiting, Deputy, I don't have all day." Jacob informed her with a hint of impatience in his voice.

"You and I have been playing a serious game of cat and mouse since I've gotten here. You hit me, I hit you back, I hit you, you hit me back, it's just how it's always been. But look around you Jacob, neither of us are winning. I know you see it too. The Project and the Resistance are at each other's throats but both of us are going down, neither side is getting what they want.

"The land is suffering and the people are suffering, on both sides. How many people do you lose in a day? In a week? It's bloodshed, and I know you've seen bloodshed before. You've been to war, you know how dirty it can get, well we're there. Both sides of this war want nothing more than to piss off the other side and we're using people's lives to do that. This won't end in one side coming out on top of the other, this will end with this whole county burning while we squabble over the ashes." The Deputy glanced away from Jacob, biting her cheek.

"As much as I hate you for all that you've done, I don't think this fighting can continue." She finished. Every one of the Deputy's points was a fair and rational one, which infuriated Jacob because he couldn't debate them.

"What are you suggesting?" Jacob inquired but by the look on the Deputy's face he already knew what's she was going to say.

"I think that if we made a temporary peace treaty then it's possible we could work something out to where both sides can stop this incessant fighting." The words were like battery acid on the Deputy's tongue. She hated the idea of trying to work with Jacob on anything but right now she had to try and swallow her pride for the good of Hope County.

"A peace treaty? This isn't like you, Deputy. I thought that tattoo of yours said Wrath." Jacob taunted and the Deputy bit her tongue.

She took a breath and locked her jaw. "I'm not lying Jacob. This is the only way I can see this ending without this County getting destroyed."

"What if I say no?" Jacob questioned, tilting his head as if he were looking at a peculiar science experiment.

"Then I'll have no choice but to fight back, but if you say yes then I think this can work." The Deputy's voice wasn't masking any of her anger as she spoke but she was sincere, she really did want to see this fighting stop.

"Saying yes isn't my expertise." Jacob responded, hoping to keep this conversation adversarial.

"You can talk to your brothers. I can't get near them. If I step on a branch wrong in John's region he shoots me in the back and forces me to confess shit, Joseph won't listen to me because he's convinced I'm Hell incarnate, Faith would never even consider it if it came from me. So that leaves you. Believe me, if I thought I could go to any other sibling I would but I didn't, I came to talk to you." The Deputy made a fair point. Jacob knew that if she tried to walk in anywhere and talk peace then his siblings wouldn't blink before doing what they always do.

Joseph might listen but he was near impossible to get alone. Jacob knew why she came to him, that part he didn't need help with. Their relationship was more cat-and-mouse. Both of their moves against each other were calculated and not impulsive, they talked far more than any of his other siblings did with the Deputy, even if you ignore the time they spent in the cabin together.

Jacob studied her in silence for a minute, probably to see if she was truly being sincere. It was strange to see her in this light in person. Every time he's seen her outside of the Veterans Centre it's been through the cameras, but in real life you could really see the wear the fighting has had on her. Her gashed cheek was still healing, the weight she'd lost was evident in her face and neck only, since she kept the rest of herself covered. He could see the dark bags hanging under her eyes, weighing her whole face down with them.

Jacob remembered seeing her when she first entered the church last year. Her face was serious and stoic, her posture was stiff and yet her eyes told a different story. Even in the dark her eyes showed you right into her soul. When she hesitated before putting the cuffs on Joseph, Jacob just watched her. They were full of life even if they were serious, and her face was full and healthy, she looked like a real person and Jacob had to admit that she was an attractive person. John of course made a comment about her physical attractiveness later that made Jacob roll his eyes but he couldn't exactly deny it.

The Deputy standing in front of him now was not that first Deputy. This one was tired and in pain, and in that moment Jacob realized it. She was broken already. He had broken her because otherwise she would be cursing him out and spitting at his face. Her gaze was angry and full of fire but that fire was fading. He had watched her walk up through binoculars and noticed how bad her limp was.

Good God, she was falling apart right under his nose.

"So? Will you agree to talk to your brothers?" The Deputy was obviously uncomfortable with Jacob's staring.

Jacob realized he used his time to think about the Deputy instead of a peace treaty. "I will talk to Joseph, only if you get the Whitetails to agree to a temporary peace treaty as well." Jacob bargained and the Deputy fought to keep her relief off her face.

"I'll do that." The Deputy nodded. Jacob seemed satisfied with their discussion and turned to walk back into the woods.

"Hey Jacob?" The Deputy got his attention again. "This doesn't mean we're on the same side, this just means we aren't fighting each other right now." She clarified and Jacob gave her a nod.

"Understood." He was about to turn again and walk away when he heard the Deputy's radio crackle.

"Watch ou-" was all that Grace Armstrong could get out before the Deputy's chest heaved like she'd been punched. Jacob couldn't process what happened until he saw a growing spot of red on the Deputy's chest.

Her face was just as shocked as Jacob's was. She brought a hand up to feel her chest, pulling away a hand drenched in red blood. She fell to her knees, her hand still shaking in front of her. It was like all sound had shut off in Jacob's ears, he couldn't hear a thing except for the Deputy's shuddering gasp of pain. She'd been shot by a sniper.

His feet brought him to her side as she fell back into the dirt road. He grabbed a handkerchief out of his pocket and jammed it in her bullet hole, forcing a whine of pain from the Deputy. He placed a hand over her bullet hole and grabbed his radio. "Who the fuck fired that shot?" He shouted into his radio, his head looking around furiously as he tried to stop the bleeding.

"I said who the fuck fired that shot?" He demanded once more.

"It wasn't us sir! None of us have our safety off!" A panicked voice came across the radio.

"Then find the person that did! Now!" He dropped his radio and brought his other hand back to the Deputy's chest.

Blood was pouring out between his fingers while he cursed. "Don't you dare die right now Deputy. Not now, not here." Jacob threatened while pressing his weight into her chest.

"Get away from her now, Jacob!" A familiar voice shouted from behind him. Jess Black had her bow drawn and aimed right for his head.

[nataliedanovelist]

GF - Everything

For @lemonfodrizzleart, featuring her oc, Jackie Asante. I hope you like it, sweetie! The comic that inspired the first half can be found here.

~~~~~~~~~~

Stan gave his girl an impressed look when she downed another shot of tequila and she asked for her second blue pineapple margarita. He brought his second jug of Angry Orchard up to his lips, reminiscing on the brown sugar that laced the rim of the glass, his eyes up at one of the many TVs playing different ball games. Stan was drawn into a football game and he winced with a smile as one guy got tackled by seven different guys, so close to a touchdown.

Jackie gave her guy a soft smile as he let the heavy glass land on the wooden bar with a quiet clunk. He looked very handsome right now, relaxed, sitting back in his chair while watching the game, the soft bar lights highlighting his beautiful features, like his soft brown eyes and matching mullet, his contagious smile. Sure he only sported worn jeans, a dirty white t-shirt, and a maroon jacket that look like it had been through the mill, but to Jackie he looked like a million bucks.

The bartender scooped up Stan’s first empty jug and asked, “‘Nother round?”

Stan shrugged casually. It was pretty late, the two coming in after a long day, so he guessed he could handle another pair before heading back to the motel. “Sure, why not?”

The bartender nodded, finished Jackie’s rita, slid it to her, and then quickly fetched two jugs and dunked the rims in a small bowl of sugar before filling it with beer. Thank Moses for Happy Hour, Every Hour. She dropped off the two glasses and asked, “Anythang else, lovelies?”

“Nope.” Jackie answered after the two exchanged looks and she happily munched on a tortilla chip spooning salsa with extra hot sauce mixed in.

The bartender smiled and let the most sober of everyone in the bar do as they please; it was pretty late and this odd but adorable couple had come in just a few minutes ago, so while others should probably be cut off these love birds were fine for a few more drinks.

Jackie and Stan were close, but not close enough. Jackie looked at her boyfriend’s toned body again and desperately wanted to feel it, be closer, so she leaned towards him, resting her head on his shoulder, and Stan smiled and wrapped his arm around her. Jackie was grateful he was looking at the escalating football game, so he couldn’t see the stupid grin on his face.

Stan privately considered himself pretty damn lucky. Not only had he been in a town for five days without making enemies (a new record), and he actually had enough money for a room and he didn’t have to sleep in his car, but he had an amazing woman on him who not only wanted to be around him, but was willing to go anywhere in order to do so. Jackie didn’t have to travel with him across states, looking for something and nothing all at the same time, but she did. One day Stan would make it up to her. One day he would actually manage to not be a screw-up and buy her a house and her own car and give her kids and whatever else she wanted.

Unfortunately, natured called and Stan had to stretch and have Jackie sit up. “Bathroom.”

��K’.” Jackie grinned as he snuck a quick kiss on her cheek before leaving her alone, but her smile was soon gone.

Stan felt a little colder with her gone from his hip, and as he washed his hands he thought that maybe they should finish their drinks, pay the bartender, and go back to the motel so he could hold her and show her how much she meant to her, however she wanted him to. Stan grinned in the mirror at the idea and emerged from the bathroom just in time to have the color in his face drain and his heart stop at a horrifying scene.

Jackie was facing a man much bigger and bulkier than her (even a little bigger than Stan), and she punched him in the face, leaving a bruise on his face. Stan wanted to be proud, but the guy was way bigger than her and could hurt her. “JACKIE, NO!”

Jackie tried to land another punch, but her wrist was grabbed to stop her, and in retaliation the guy punched her in the face.

Stan saw red. He didn’t need context or to know what had happened for this whole mess to even occur. He didn’t care. Somebody had punched his girl.

Stan charged across the room and just as Jackie kneed the guy in the balls and shoved him away, that left an opening for Stan to pounce on him and go ham. All those years of boxing practice were paying off as he wailed on the guy left and right in the face, over the jerk as he laid on the floor and kicked Stan off of him.

In an instant, Stan spun, grabbed Jackie’s hand, and ran out of the bar with her as fast as they could for the Stanmobile, which soon made screeches against the concrete and sped away.

After a few breaths in the passenger’s seat, Jackie looked over at the conman driving and she knew her instincts were correct. The dead-pan look on his face, how tightly he held onto the wheel, the anger fuming from his spirit. He was mad. And Jackie wasn’t stupid, she knew who he was mad at. So she crossed her arms over her chest and watched the world outside zoom by.

At the motel room, Stan pulled out the first aid kit from his suitcase and pointed to the bed. “Sit.” His voice was low and cold, but not completely harsh, which was a good sign.

Jackie plopped down at the foot of the bed and Stan knelt before her, eye-level to get a good look at her face. She had a bruise forming under her eye. It was a little bit swollen, but it could have been much worse. No cuts or torn skin, which was good, so Stan walked off for the bathroom and ran a washcloth under some cool water, then came back and started to clean up the eye. Jackie closed her eyes, both as a sign of her discomfort, but to make Stan’s job a little easier.

This wasn’t the first time Jackie had gotten into a fight, and Stan knew exactly what she had been fighting about.

Jackie had her arms crossed over her blue t-shirt covered chest, silent and waiting for the lecture. Usually Jackie would let Stan rant until he was done and then make a snappy remark that would end his argument, but tonight Jackie was angry. Not like Stan was, fuming and growling and shaking. She was an icy kind of angry, the cold, distant kind of angry. (Stan was painfully reminded how that was the kind of angry his brother got.) Jackie made up her mind that tonight she was gonna say something, and she was begging for her boyfriend to pick a fight.

After cleaning her up and helping the swelling go down, Stan tossed the damp washcloth aside and stood. Here we go. “Jackie, you can’t keep gettin’ into fights!”

Jackie quit looking down at the ugly carpet and she snapped back. “He was talking shit!”

“So what?!” Stan yelled back. He had heard what that guy was spitting behind his back while he watched the game. And, believe it or not, he had chosen not to make a big deal about it. Not with Jackie there. “I hear that shit all the time! Don’t fuckin’ fight for me!”

That only made Jackie more pissed. “Well excuse me for giving a shit about you, Stan!” She screeched. “I can handle a fight, especially when they diss you!”

Jackie was startled when Stan grabbed her by her shoulders, but rather than shake her or yell at her like other men might, she was even more alarmed when his head was bowed and his whole body was quivering. The little fire inside of him was slowly dying due to lack of fuel. Jackie opened her mouth to ask him what was wrong, but his voice stopped her, meek and quiet and desperate to be heard.

“Jackie… please…” He looked up at her and Jackie’s face softened to find tears in the corner of his soft brown eyes. “I don’t wanna lose you, too.”

“Hey,” Jackie whispered and slowly brought her hands to his cheeks, cupping his strained, tired face. “Hey.” She cooed softly. “Stanley, you couldn’t lose me if you tried. You’re stuck with me.”

Stan snorted and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Good.”

Jackie smiled and gently pulled him closer. “C’mere.”

Stan crawled up onto the bed and laid down as Jackie leaned back, wrapping her arms around his shoulder and placing a hand in his hair. Stan hugged her around her waist, his ear over her heart and listening to the beautiful beat. He took in some deep breaths, trying to calm down, and it was easier with her breathing to copy.

Jackie had known for a while that Stan had a crippling fear of not only heights, but of losing what little he had. He never talked about his past, but from what little Jackie had picked up from the taboo subject, he had lost everything. He wasn’t like some where they never had anything. He was like her, both of whom once had something or everything, but it was now gone. At least Jackie walked away, chose to leave what she had; she got the impression that Stan didn't have a choice.

She kissed his soft mullet and began to comb it as she whispered, “Stanley, you’re not gonna lose me. Not ever.”

“I think I’d believe you if you’d quit gettin’ into fights, sweetheart.” He joked.

Jackie rolled her eyes and chuckled.

Stan’s smile dropped. “Seriously though, if anything happened to you…”

“I can look after myself.” Jackie reminded him.

“I know you can. But you don’t have to anymore.”

“Then let me look after you, too, okay?”

“I will, but there’s a difference between helpin’ me wake up with both kidneys and gettin’ hurt all for some nobody on the street.”

“Hey,” Jackie said, this time not as soft as before, a bit more firm. Stan was reminded of a stern warning a mother might give. “You’re not a nobody. You’re my everything.”

Stan’s hold tightened ever so slightly. “And you’re mine. Which is why I need you safe.”

Jackie took in a deep breath and let it out through her button nose. She knew Stan had a point. And it was only fair. After all he gave up boxing matches for cash when he came home bloody one night and reduced Jackie to tears. She had certainly noticed how less inclined he was to fight or get into serious trouble. Sure, he had no issue stealing toilet paper or scamming suckers for an extra buck, but his Colombian prison days were far behind him.

Jackie scratched his shoulder comfortably and whispered, “Alright. I promise, no more fights. Unless they swing first.” She added cheekily.

Stan laughed quietly into her chest and nodded. “Unless they swing first.”

Just as Stan had hoped for, they laid on that bed for hours and snuggled. A few minutes after their agreement, Jackie began to hum a soft song as she continually combed his hair with her fingers. Stan smiled drowsily and was more than happy to fall asleep in the arms of the woman he loved.

~~~~~~~~~~

The young couple left Pueblo, Colorado and stopped at a little motel in Moab, Utah. It was a little bit nicer than the last room, accompanied by a small balcony with a sliding glass door to a view of the rocky red mountains and an iron and board to go with it. These made for good, cheap laundry. Just a little air freshener on the clothes and a quick run-through with the iron and as long as it didn’t have a stain any piece of clothing was as good as new, a free way to do laundry without forking some money for some quarters and some soap.

It was Stan’s turn to do the laundry, and he did so only in his boxers, standing in front of the king-sized bed as Jackie was looking out the huge window that covered most of the wall opposite to the door.

“Lee, do you think I’m pretty?”

Stan nearly burned his fingers when he looked up from his work. He had enough sense to turn off the iron and not rest it on his shirt, but just enough. Her back was to him in a baggy t-shirt (that he probably stole from him) and faded pink yoga pants. Her reflection was in the glass window and Stan not only saw how depressingly she held her hands and gazed ahead, he realized Jackie’s attention wasn’t on the view.

“Babe, what do you see?” Stan asked gently.

Jackie snorted and shook her head. “Not much.”

“That’s not what I see.” He said firmly and left the ironing board to be with her, standing behind her and tenderly wrapping his arms around her so her hands were lightly trapped to her chest. “I see everything a man could ever want in a woman.” Jackie pressed her lips together and freed a hand to hold Stan’s. But he wasn’t done.

“Eyes so deep and dark you can get lost in ‘em, skin the color of mahogany and soft as satin, a body fit for a goddess.” Stan kissed her forehead, cheek, and then neck slowly, softly. And then joined her gaze at their reflection and smiled at what he saw. “Look how beautiful you are.”

Jackie looked away as she blinked furiously, but Stan wasn’t having it. “Look,” He whispered and gently lifted her head up with his finger to her chin. “Look how beautiful you are.”

Jackie forced her tears away and turned to face her man. “Lee…”

He only grinned and held up a finger. “Ah, ah.” Stan hurried to the TV, turned it on, and flicked on the All Jazz channel. Jackie grinned as he went back to her. “Am I lucky enough to dance with everything a man could ever want?”

“Stanley,” Jackie wrapped her arms around his chest, nuzzling the side of her face into Stan’s hairy body. Her throat was still tight. She forced herself to swallow as they swayed to the music and she managed to croak out, “I love you.”

Stan kissed the top of her head and smiled, rubbing her back and squeezing her shoulder. “I love you, too.”

[diegolabhont]

I didn't mean to fall in love with you

Chapter One

Book: Queen B - Choices (Universe)

Pairing:  Poppy Min-Sinclair x Trans!Male MC  (Beck Hughes)

Genre: None (in this post, al least)

Rating: Anyone can read it, really.

This is me trying to write by and for the Trans community, specially FTM community, meaning, trans guys, but I actually took the liberty to use They/them pronouns for everyone out there who´s interested (Also, the name Beck was the most neutral one I could find, trying to use the cannon Bea Hughes)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Can someone explain to her how a person who claims to be so disinterested in the ranking was magically climbing to the top twenty?

Poppy didn’t buy it for a second, she always knew Beck were going to be a pain in her ass ever since the first time she saw them looking at her as if they weren’t impressed, but she wasn’t fully aware of how much.

“You don’t have to worry about them, Poppy” Chloe said while the strawberry blonde retouch her make up in the mirror inside her own room. “Beck is just a dude”

“Transphobia much, Chloe?” Veronica murmured playfully, wanting to start drama among her streaming fans.

“No! What I'm saying is… Beck's brain works as a regular dude, right? How much smart can they be?”

“Ha! That´s rich coming from you” Veronica laughed.

Both girls started a discussion about related shit, Beck’s brain, hormones and else while Poppy put on the mascara. Completely silent, thinking.

She treated Beck as a common enemy, she attacked them just like she would to any other lost lamb trying to be the wolf but it was not enough. Even one of those plans exploded in her own face: ruining and breaking Beck's guitar caused that they not only get a flashy and beautiful new one, but sang side by side with the one and only Jaylen Riaz, making a huge performance. Even better than hers, which was something painful and humiliating at the same time, especially after Veronica told her Beck’s YouTube channel had a followers increase, making them even more popular.

Chloe was right on something: Beck’s brain worked like a dude, and if she had learned something was that men in general were manipulable. Take a look at Michael, he was dumb as hell. Liam was a douchebag. Luis, Ford… well, they… they´re there. The only golden boy among them was Carter, and yet, he wasn´t that hard, she just gave him what he wanted in that party and after that, everything ran smoothly.

And that´s what she needed.

Poppy´s look changed, her eyes sparkled in a very malicious way and a smile crossed her face for a split second. She now had a plan, and unexpectedly, it was a Chloe attribution.

“Maybe if we accused them of cheating…?” Chloe suggested, but Poppy knew better.

“That won´t be necessary, Chlo” Poppy intervened for the first time in a while, making both girls look at her intrigued. They knew Poppy, and the little smile she had on her lips as she applied lipstick was a proof. The blonde was onto something juicy. Veronica ended the live and awaited. “Beck will be mine.”

~~X~~

It was kinda lame to her, but finding Beck completely alone under the football stands playing guitar was at least convenient. They were an eye candy from the start, that was a fact. The way that white t-shirt embraced their body was something else to see, her mind went back to the second time she saw them. The sassy rock star kind of look Beck had, even the haircut was perfect, Poppy knew that was a Zoey Wade signature and she kinda thanked her for it. Beck was damn fine, that fact made easier her plan to be honest.

“You know… You do pass pretty well as a man”

Beck stopped playing, literally frozen in place as a statue.

“What did you just say?” Their tone of voice was cold, almost insulted. Did she just get it wrong? No, she´s never wrong. A Queen can´t be wrong, especially a Min-Sinclair queen.

“It was a compliment, Farmsville” she said, rolling her eyes.

“That´s not a compliment” Beck chuckled, putting the guitar aside. “I mean, I don´t mind, but if you are going to use that to the trans community… It~ may not end well” Poppy frowned, a little pissed off. She was doing an effort, no-one had ever heard a compliment from her and this little sh… “But thanks.” Beck offered her a sweet smile a second before turn it into a mocking one. “You do pass pretty well as a woman, too”

“Go fuck yourself!”

“And now she gets it!” They started laughing, making her really angry. Poppy walked away fuming, her head up high and a killer look murdering anyone who dare crossing ways with her.

That stupid ASSHOLE. Did they THINK they could disrespect her?! To HER! She was the number ONE, the fucking RULER of the entire school. Beck was lucky enough to be in her radar and they just throw stupid shit like that!

“To be fair… I did say it first”

“I thought it was a COMPLIMENT” She fight against herself. “What am I? Some trans expert?!”

“No… But I can be. I mean, to destroy my enemy…”

“I have to know them...”

Even thought she was still mad about it, Poppy tapped wildly though her phone. She needed to do something, and she knew just the thing.

“It´s ON, jackass”

~~X~~

POV: Beck

Top fifteen. Everyone was losing their shit because they were now top twenty and Beck... Well... They just didn´t want it.

And yeah, sure, that was kinda good. The students in Belvoire had begun to pay attention to their music as well, Beck even caught a few of them listen to songs Beck wrote and some other cover as well. Their art was taking off and that was awesome, don't get it wrong, that was something Beck wanted for so long, but...

They were afraid.

What if it was because of the stupid ranking?

What if Beck just wasn´t that good, and the only thing people would want was that Beck who studded up against Poppy Min-Sinclaire and lived to tell? Even Zoey, she was talking about popularity, Belvoire elite, and some “Person to watch-out” or shit Award which yes, was huge! But… Beck really was afraid that it was Beck who puts the music high and not backwards.

What if…

What if Poppy really messes all up?

“You know… You do pass pretty well as a man”

Poppy´s words in their mind caught Beck off guard. What was her deal anyway? She came and said some weird shit, and...

Actually, everything in that interaction was weird as fuck. And not just that, Beck meet Taylor by accident later that day in the ice cream shop, they both talked a little and they found out she had a big crush onto some random guy Beck didn´t knew before.

Of course Beck was the matchmaker! They even helped her by carrying those stupid anti-diarrheic pills to the lion´s den. Ok, yes, maybe~ Beck should´ve had given them to someone and not just let them in the front door… But it wasn´t their fault that The T found out!! Poppy was losing it, and of course it was them to blame.

Why can´t they just have a normal life… with normal problems… and not… this?

“I´m dead… I´m actually dead…” Beck thought while burying their head on their hands, tired.

“Beck? Hello? I assume you heard the details of the assignment.”

“What?”

“Ehm… Yeah! Totally” Beck said with a “confident” smile that nobody believed in, Professor Roberta even frowned before going back to the lecture, while Beck tried uselessly to catch something about the assignment from their classmates´ laptops. She hated Beck anyway, but it wasn´t good news to be always in her bad side.

“Shit! Shit! Shit! … What did she say?”

“Mass comm is all about reaching people far and wide, so this project is meant to give the voiceless in our own community a voice by…”

A penetrant gaze nailed their nape, giving them chills. Beck immediately looked for that one hawk over them and not to their surprise the person found on the other side was that deadly beauty called Poppy Min-Sinclair, watching Beck as they´re a prey. Feeling really drove up the wall, Beck winked playfully at her, expecting her to look away or some rude expression towards them.

But no.

Scaring the shit out of them, Poppy actually smiled back at Beck. A sweet, flirty smile that left them feeling their heart racing as crazy and their cheeks burning red, her dark eyes so into theirs that all their system collapsed... What was happening?

“Earth to Beck!”

Professor Roberta yelled, making Beck jump a little in their sit, breaking all eye contact between them both. When did Beck turn their body completely to watch Poppy? Of course the professor was mad, Beck was practically giving her their back! As faster as they could, Beck took the right seat, being even more embarrassed now while Poppy let go a chuckle, they could hear her from any other laughter just as clearly as if she were so close.

“Oh, sorry. I… Sorry”

“Find your community service project partner please” Professor said. Beck gathered their things and head into the aisle, looking around, praying to find someone whiling to work with them and, mainly, explain to them what was that project about. The thing was everyone had already a partner. Everyone except for…

The strawberry blonde was gazing Beck as sure as someone who´s waiting for this chance can be. Smiling that same smile that caused them to feel butterflies in their stomach… Beck wasn´t sure if they were aroused… or scared.

“Professor Roberta… I need a new partner” Beck practically begged. “I´m sorry. I just can´t work with Poppy.”

The pretty but odd teacher was about to say something. Something bad based on the expression on her face, but a perfect made-up laughter cut her words, as Beck was feeling how a soft and warm hand hooked to their arm.

“Nonsense, professor! I am pretty sure we´ll be working just fine.” Poppy said, a relaxed expression drawn on her porcelain face. “Let´s go, Hughes.”

Ok, Beck was now scared. As both of them walked out the classroom, Beck´s brain was running wild, thinking about every and each form Poppy could use to disappear them from the face of the earth. Ironic, Beck survived Farmsville but they´ll be totally done in New York. Ha! Life hates them.

“Listen, I know what you are thinking…”

Really?

“... but the last thing I need right now is having my GPA taken away. So I´ve already figured it all out. We´re doing an animal shelter commercial for our project. I can ask daddy to borrow the equipment and crew”

“Didn´t think of you as a daddy person” Beck laughed, a little more repose.

“Shut the fuck up, Farmsville. This will be easy, so all I need you to do is… Oh my god.”

Poppy stared at her phone completely in shock, color draining from her face as it was sucked by a dementor.

“I have to go. We can figure out the deets later, I´ll text you where to meet me”

Then, she just left. Beck took a deep breath and let out a hiss.

“Gosh, this school is going to kill me!”

They said, who would have thought a class could be so much?

-----

Next

[dazed--xx]

Beside you (JJK POV)

Genre: ANGST,SMUT, if you squint fluff

Word count: 4,327

TRIGGER WARNING: NONE

A/N: SO I am writing part 2 but some people were confused on whether or not jungkook had feelings for Y/N so i decided to do his POV to get his side of the story. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You may kiss the bride” The words bring disgust to my heart. “um...Jungkook?” She whispers scared as I roll my eyes and place a light kiss on her lips. My lips brush against her ear as I whisper “Just know this will be the last time you ever get to kiss me.” A satisfied smirk displayed across my face as hers falls, as we walk down the aisle as an officially married couple, hand and hand, keeping up appearances for my father. I do a quick glance at him and he gives me a thumbs up. Idiot I think as I shake my head, we rush through the double doors of the church and disappear in the car placed in the front of the building of worship.  

Once we got in the car, I retract my hand, disgusted at this stupid plan my father has come up with. I don’t love Y/N. My father doesn’t want the world to know about his losses, he doesn’t want the great Jeon name ruined due to his misdeeds now I'm the one fucking paying for it marrying this spoiled sheltered little rich girl. He doesn’t care, he just wants to keep her stupid father happy. My father probably didn’t realize why no one else, not even her own father, didn’t want Y/N.  

At the reception I disappeared as soon as we walked through the door. To the bar, to anywhere farther away from her. “Hey Handsome, what are you having?” The bartender asks as I look around the room. The amount of people that has shown up to this stupid ass wedding is pretty impressionable, Y/N making her way around the room talking to everyone she comes across. “Rum and coke” I look at the beautiful red headed woman across from me at the bar. She hands me my drink “so gorgeous what do you like to get into?” she smiles and says “trouble” a smirk flashes across my face. I down the rest of my drink “well let's go get into some trouble then what do you say huh baby girl?” “Uhm... I honestly really wish I could but I don’t want to get in trouble I’m working” She says nervously. “Don’t worry baby girl it's my wedding. So, I mean technically I am the one paying you, and you deserve a break” I laugh. She nods and runs from behind the bar “I'm Areum by the way.”  

After about a few months, I've seen Areum more and more. Her body satisfying my sexual needs, she's growing more and more attached. My irritation with her becoming more and more evident as her calls become more frequent. Ending things is too hard at this point she's threatened to go to my father about our relationship knowing it could possibly ruin his whole scheme. His anger with me growing as he never sees me with Y/N when I visit. So, he made me help Y/N move her things into the home my parents bought for us. Her presence irking my soul every time I hear her melodic laugh from her bedroom. Y/N is a beautiful girl, yet I despise her because of my father. He’s the reason I'm trapped in a loveless marriage expunging this girl of her money. I own my own businesses I work every day but it's never enough to pay off the debts my father continues to rack up. Y/N has taken over the second bedroom and every time she gets out of the shower shed have to pass my room to get to hers, in nothing but a towel, and my heart would stop. My member growing hard at the image of her, the thought of her naked body walking into my room and riding my hard cock, growing harder and harder to push back in my head as the days go by.

After a while I become used to Y/N, her bubbly personality begins to light the whole house when she gets up in the morning. The days I have hard mornings mostly due to Areum, and I throw and break things Y/N doesn’t complain about the items almost attacking her, she smiles at me nods and goes to the kitchen to make me tea. She doesn’t ask about my troubles; she just goes to sooth them with the tea she constantly buys knowing it's my favorite. She doesn’t even drink tea. She doesn’t deserve to be married to a man like me. She's growing more and more a part of my daily routine. Her melodic voice in the shower waking me up every morning with her renditions of Eyes,nose,lips , I am the best, or whatever tune is in her head. Her questions about work after I get home, soon she becomes the only person I cannot wait to talk to Areum slowly growing out of my mind. My words of divorcing Y/N becoming more and more untrue as her aura consumes me.

One morning I woke up the house dead silent. “Y/N-ah?” silence. I jump out of my bed and make my way to her door. She probably slept in; an idea crept into my mind. I make my way to her door “Y/N-ie?” silence. Concern fills me as I open her door “Y/N? I was wondering if-” My words cut off as the sight of an empty unmade bed comes into view. I rush to my room and dial Y/N’s number, a ringing is heard throughout the house. “Fuck!” I shout as I dial Y/N’s fathers' number. “Hello sir um you wouldn’t happen to know where Y/N is would you?” “EXCUSE ME? YOU LOST MY DAUGHTER JEON!?!?” “No, I just woke up and she wasn’t here she said a while ago she wanted to visit you, I just assumed she did” The line ended. Panic took over my body as I dial my father's number. “Y/N is missing” I say to him softly.  

An hour later Y/N and my father are sitting on my couch as they lecture me on my irresponsibility, and failure at her disappearing in the first place. I hear the door knob moving and my head whips around.  

“Jungkook-ah I’m back is anyone he-” I hear as I jump off the couch and dash towards Y/N. My breathing heavy and a sigh of relief escapes my mouth. “Fuck I thought something happened to you” I state grabbing both sides of her face making sure she's okay. “Where were you? I woke up and tried to see if you wanted to go get breakfast and you weren't answering the door, so I opened it and you weren't there your bed is made where'd you sleep? I called your dad, man. I called MY dad” She gives me a beautiful smile and the worry washes away as she notices the 2 men on the couch and gives them a polite bow. “I'm sorry Kook-ah I woke up really early and chose to go for a walk. I lost track of time and only made it home just now I'm okay”  

Since that day I’ve asked her to always keep me informed that she will be going out, my heart cannot take waking up to worry as much as I did that day. The need for her attention builds inside me and one night I can't contain it “Hey, do you want to go out with me tonight?” I ask shyly. “Yes! I mean yeah sure that sounds fun” She beams and my heart skips a beat.  She rushes to her bedroom to get ready as I go to my bedroom to get dressed excitement filling me. I wait in front of the door for Y/N as my phone pings with a text from Areum.

Areum<3: Daddy I want to see you I'm going to the club tonight you should come by. I promise I'll be a good girl for you 😉.  

I roll my eyes hmm I could definitely use something to get this frustration out.

Me: I'll see you there baby girl.  

The sound of heels clicking against the hardwood floor, brings me back to reality. My eyes slowly observing every curve in Y/N’s figure. My pants growing tight as I try to speak “Uhm... Let’s...”  She smiles and grabs my hand as she pulls me out of the house “Let’s go Jungkookie” FUCK JUNGKOOK JUST MAKE IT THROUGH THE DAMN NIGHT

Once we arrived at the club, I grab Y/N’s hand and stop her “Look, I know you don’t go out a lot and I want you to have as much fun as you want to okay. She smiles and nods as I release her hand catching sight of Areum. I make my way over to her “Hey stranger” she exclaims excitedly. I nod at her and smile “So...? You invited me here for a reason, right?” She smirks “Of course you know I'd never waste your time just wasn’t expecting to see your ugly ass wife” Anger builds and its evident on my face by Areums next comment. “Okay grumpy boy I'm sorry..... I forgot sensitive subject but don’t worry I'll make you forget all about her come on” She grabs my hand and leads me to the bathroom.

The second the bathroom door closes behind me Areum locks the door. “Jungkook I'm not happy...why don’t you see me anymore? Are you actually going to act on those stupid things you said you were feeling for that wife of yours?” I shake my head, Y/N would never want me to. I press my lips to hers and press her against the sink. She pulls my zipper down and pulls her panties off. “No foreplay, no time just fuck me okay?” she states as she bends over the counter, I grab the condom out of my pocket.  

Soon I'm pulling my pants back on and walking out of the bathroom as Areum cleans herself off “CALL ME!” She shouts as the door closes behind me. My eyes scan the club and Y/N is nowhere in sight. I make my way through the dance floor. In need of a drink I make my way over to the bar and order a few shots. Soon I see Y/N laughing in a conversation with some guy across the bar. Her eyes shining like the stars and my heart flutters. Why does he get to hear that beautiful laugh? it should only be for me. She’s MINE, but she's not it's hard to remember she's not. My mind going back to the feeling of her lips on mine at our wedding my need to feel them again growing. This guy is flirting with her, I can tell by the smirk he’s kept on his face. His eyes drifting to her chest, the anger growing in the pit of my stomach. WHO THE FUCK DOES HE THINK HE IS?!?!?! WHY IS SHE STILL FUCKING TALKING TO HIM??? WHY DON’T YOU LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT? I rush behind her and hear this prick say seductively “SO... I hate to be THAT guy but are you here alone?” IM.GOING.TO.FUCKING.KILL.YOU.ASSHOLE. My jealousy growing too strong to contain as I wrap my arm around Y/N’s waist and growl at the prick flirting with the woman I've secretly come to love “No she's here with me...... her husband” I pull Y/N against my chest and she relaxes and presses her ass against me. “And were supposed to be having a good time together...without you”

“Sorry man, I didn’t know she was married. You know...since she was standing here by herself for a while, shit it looked like she didn’t seem to mind spending time with me” The prick smirks sarcastically. The anger is growing more and more within me. “Excuse me?!?” I shout, He rolls his eyes and looks at Y/N “You trying to go somewhere less crowded you look really uncomfortable with how many people are here” YOURE FUCKING DEAD I pull Y/N behind me and punch the asshole in the face. He stumbles back and returns the blow. Hitting him repeatedly I end up on top of him bashing my fist into his face. A large hand lifts me and a man in a yellow shirt begins dragging me out of the club as I try to swing around him at the man. Y/N’s hand grabs my hand and instantly I feel calm. Her head is down as we get into the car on our way back home

I feel her eyes burning the side of my face examining me to see if I am hurt. My anger growing as the concern on her face becomes more evident. “Why was he with you Y/N” My voice laced with sadness and jealousy. Her soft voice whines, obviously drunk “He just came up to and we started talking he bought me a couple drinks that’s all Kookie, I promise.” my heart breaks as she slurs her words, but the questions can’t stop. “Would you have gone home with him? Would you have let him fuck you?” My voice is shaky “WHAT? NO! Jungkook-ah I swear nothing like that would have happened I swear, the only person I actually WANT to fuck me is you. I mean Mark was really attractive and I'm sure he would have shown me a great time but I've never wanted to sleep with anyone but you kookie” I smile her statement makes me hard just thinking about her letting me fuck her “Don’t worry baby girl I'll do that for you.” I smirk as I pull into the driveway. I turn the car off and run over to the passenger side as I open the door she gets out and hugs me “Oh yeah Kookie? Are you gonna make me cum for you?” She smiles up at me. My cock twitching, the world begins to spin and suddenly for the first time all night I feel tipsy I wrap my arms around her waist, grabbing onto her hip pulling her ass against me slowly grinding my hard cock against her beautiful round ass. Her neck leaning to the side resting on my shoulder inviting my lips, I take the opportunity to tease the beautiful woman I'm going to turn into my little slut tonight. My lips spilling one of my deepest secrets “mmm Baby girl, I wanna eat your pussy so bad” I smack her ass seductively and she moans under her breathe. My cock rock hard probably deep red from the need for real relief the relief I’ve craved so badly ever since the first time I’ve seen you in a towel. I turn her around and thrown her over my shoulder and carry her into the house.

I wake up with a warm feeling on my chest, my eyes flutter open. The events from last night reply in my mind and I look down at Y/N. A smile creeps up onto my face. Slowly I make my way out of my bed sure to not wake Y/N to call my friend Jimin for advice on what to do now. “YO what's up Jungkookie” Jimin shouts through on the second ring.”1 don’t call me that 2 stop yelling I'm fucking hungover!” I growl. “What did you want then boy.” I swallow nervously “So, I kind of slept with Y/N last night” “SEE I TOLD YOU, YOURE IN LOVE WITH HER HAHAHAHAHA YOURE SO IN LOVE WITH HER!” He shouts, my head pounding, the untrue words of denial begin spewing out of my mouth “I don’t know Jimin we fucked like 4 times Jimin but that’s all she helped me cum and I helped her that’s all it was” “Yeahhhh, suuuuurrrrreeeee. When are you going to just admit you have feelings for her huh? It's okay you know”

“No I don’t have feelings for her, we used each other Jimin, It wasn’t like that this guy was talking to her at the club and she told me she wasn’t going to go home with him but let's be honest if I wasn’t there she would have went with him and I can't have some slut for a wife” The insults spew out of my mouth like vomit, my pride never accepting that Jimin could be right. “Dude that’s wrong man, but what if she thinks something is going to happen between you guys now? Like was it good enough for her you think?” He asks pointedly.

“No man I just helped her cum so she doesn’t start going out for some rando guy to get her off she doesn’t really expect anything from it. She just wanted to cum that’s how good little whores do it and from last night I know she's one of the best sluts I've ever met so easy to get her to do anything for me cause she's a sub” “Damn well if you're done with her let me -” His words making me regret my big ass ego and words “Look I got to go Jimin before she gets up I got to get he out of my bed before she thinks I want her there all the time-” “I'm just saying if you won't fuck her again I definitely will I don’t care about sloppy seconds” He interrupts  “dude of course I'm gonna fuck her again it's one of the best pussies I've ever had......your stupid dude bye” I hang up the phone and hear Y/N’s door close.  

I shower and get ready for the day as a text from Areum comes through my phone.

Areum <3: Oppa I wanna see you today, Lets go to the Park.

Me: No Areum I don’t think that’s a good idea

Areum: Why?!  

Me: Because I'm married and I shouldn’t be out in public with another woman you know? If some photographer caught us my dad would kill me.

Her suggestion igniting an idea for me rushing to Y/N’s room. I stand in front of Y/N’s door my heart is pounding, as I knock lightly “Y/n-ie?” a small sniffle comes through the door, I knock again and try the handle “you okay?” her soft voice cracking as she shouts “Yeah...I’m fine” I pace back and forth, COME ON JUNGKOOK YOU CAN DO THIS JUST MAKE IT SEEM LIKE ITS NOT A DATE SHED SAY YES TO THAT RIGHT?RIGHT? Scratching the back of my neck my voice shaky “Did you want to go to breakfast maybe we can take a walk to Han River you said you like going there right?”  

“Um...Honestly Jungkook, I'm not feeling too good I'm like really hungover and I'd like to take a shower" Her answer deflates me “Oh....well can I join you then?” I smirk, the thought of last night reappearing in my head, she's silent in return “Y/N-ie? Babe?” The word slipped, it felt so natural. “Um I'm sorry Kookie but I really don’t feel like it” my heart shatters, desperate for her body next to mine I beg “Oh okay, um when you're done can you come hang out and watch a that Invisible Man movie you wanted to see” “Um sure I'll see you in a bit bye Jungkook” I pout staring at the door, confused. What happened? Why are you acting so different? Did you regret last night? Do you regret letting me touch you the way no other man has? Did you hear my conversation with Jimin? No, if you heard that conversation you'd probably leave. My heart cracks at the thought  

Did you enjoy giving yourself to me? Did you like the way I ate your tight little pussy? I sure loved the taste of her, the way you took him into your mouth and let me finish there. It drives me fucking crazy baby girl please let me in, I need to fix whatever it is to have his cock back in your mouth.  The way her face twisted her orgasm, only thing to escape your lips was my name. My cock twitching as precum flows down. Fuck the feeling of your pussy as he came deep inside you, the smile you gave him when he kissed you as his cum flowed out of your pretty little pussy.  

*Last Night*

“Fuck! Yes Jungkook, it feels so fucking good.” Y/N moans loudly. My cock pumping hard into her core, her legs wrapping around my waist. “That's my fucking pussy you got that baby girl” I push her hair out of her face and for her to look in my eyes. She nods “Just yours oppa, fuck, I don’t deserve this amazing cock oppa” Her word disheartening me. I kiss her softly, my tongue exploring her mouth her arms wrap around my neck. I thrust hard and fast into her tight cunt. Profanities spewing from my angel's lips begging me for more. “Never stop I’m yours oppa cum for me please I beg you cum for me”  

The familiar knot in my stomach rises to the surface as her climax takes over her and spill my seed in her pussy, she looks at her core and beams at me pulling me back onto her pressing her lips against mine.

*Present*

I rush back to my bedroom with the thoughts of last night, my cock in hand the second I enter the room. Stroking it hard and fast at the thought of Y/N bouncing on my hard cock. Her beautiful tits in my face as she rides my hard cock. “Fuck! Y/N” I moan.  

My eyes close, “fuck Y/n your pussy is so tight” The profanities flowing out of my mouth as my climax grows closer and closer. “Y/N yeah baby girl this is your cock, fuck all yours baby girl take it.” A loud thud alerts me I am no longer alone. Y/N’s here and she's heard the foul things he's been thinking about her. My eyes shoot open and my hand leaves my cock I shout “Y/N! I...UM...I WAS JUST....” She smiles seductively and walks toward me. “We’re you thinking about me Jungkook” She teased. I bite my lip and look down embarrassed. “Were you thinking about last night or the fact that you missed fucking me hard into the shower” I nod and sigh “both”. She lifts my face and presses her lips against mine as I pull her onto my bed  

The face she makes as I pound into her make my cock twitch inside her tight little pussy. She takes it all moaning begging for more, “Fuck baby girl you take it so good, look at your pretty pussy taking this cock the way you should.... hmmm that’s my pussy baby girl” I praise her  

“yes kookie-ah only yours” She tightens around me as her legs shake losing herself in the orgasm. “Yeah oh baby girl I'm gonna cum so deep in your pussy” I exclaim as I capture her lips with mine. “all mine baby girl” I thrust once more into her cumming hard. Jumping up I run to the bathroom, grab a wash cloth and run it in hot water.  

“Baby I brought this for you t-” My statement interrupted by the emptiness to my room. “Babe!” I shout to her. Heading to her bedroom, to see if she wants to shower together. My heart warming at the thought of something so domestic. “Baby did you want- what are you doing?!” I shout frozen at her door, a confused look on my face. “I'm leaving Jungkook” she says as tears stream down her beautiful face. My heart races LEAVING?!? NO “why? You don’t want to be here anymore? Did I do something? I can fix it I swear but you can't go...you can't just go when we....” My voice cracking, she interrupts me “Areum misses you and you should focus on one girl Jungkook-ah" AREUM?.............FUCK! AREUM! I run to my room to find my phone. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY AREUM?!?!? The second the phone is in my hand y/n rushes past my bedroom door.

“Y/N-AH! DON’T GO PLEASE” I shout chasing after her “Areum is just some girl she's not anyone don’t just assume because some girl texted me she misses me that I'm going to run to her” I explain “You were with her last night.....you Fucked her last night not even an hour before you fucked me, my mouth” Shaking my head, pleading with her “No it's not like that I swear like you said I fucked her, Baby girl I can't fuck you. I make love to you please I'm begging you don’t go okay I know we haven't been the best but I can fix this don’t do this not when” ....I freeze you can't leave right not when I tell you how I feel you won't leave me right? “I love you please”

 She shakes her head and walks toward the door as the sobs escape from my mouth “Stop please” I rush for the door and slam it shut. “You can't just leave, not after what we just did, not when I love you please” I beg. She smiles up at me and I can tell it’s a sad smile and kisses me. I wrap my hands around her waist kissing her with all the emotion I can to get her to see I'm serious. Soon my lips feel the shadow of her lips as I see her figure rush out the door and into her car. Running after her I grab her passenger car door handle banging on the window “please” I love you “stop” I love you “stop the car” I sob, she looks away from me and my heart completely breaks “get out please stay with me, BABY PLEASE” I shout as she reverses out of the driveway and speeds off. “FUCK!” I sprint after her car “COME BACK PLEASE I CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT YOU BABY” I drop to my knees the tears streaming down my face as she disappears.

[stevesnailbat]

the fine line | steve harrington x hopper!oc

part four : only way of knowing you

SERIES MASTERLIST

summary: Steve and Jess are finally mending their relationship, and there’s one thing left to do to bring things back to normal.

warnings: kinda angsty with some sweet, sweet smut

word count: 2.1K

a/n: this is the final part of this series!! thank you to everyone who supported it despite the amount of times i delayed writing it, enjoy! the gif is not mine, it’s from this gifset:)

There was always an ominous feeling stuck in the pit of Jess’ gut. She couldn’t escape it, no matter how hard she tried. The words to describe how she felt sat on the tip of her tongue at all times, but she wasn’t ever able to articulate them, no matter who it was to.

Improvements in her relationship with Steve were made in increments. Sometimes they moved forward, sometimes there were a few steps back. It seemed like things were coming to a standstill, though. They hadn’t made much progress and they were stuck. They were stuck in the awkward phase that every new couple has, but this time was different. It was their second time in this phase, this time was excruciatingly long.

Steve did everything he could to make her feel loved, to make her feel like she made the right decision, to make her feel happy. It didn’t seem like enough most of the time, though. He knew it wasn’t her fault, her walls were still built high and he had to break them slowly.

He tried anything and everything to close the gap between them, physically and emotionally. There were countless nights where Steve lost hours of sleep over how he’d make his next move, how he’d make her smile just once more. It was exhausting in every way possible, but he knew it would be worth it in the end. So, he pushed through the discomfort.

Despite Hop’s apprehension about letting Steve back into Jess’ life, he let her do her own thing. He told her to make her own mistakes and that he hoped she’d prove him wrong eventually. Jess usually opted for other places besides the cabin for spending time with Steve, mainly because of her dad. He was like a hawk at all times when they were there, so it was best to go elsewhere.

Jess was eventually persuaded to go to Steve’s house after running out of date ideas in the small town. She wanted to spend time with him, she really did. She was just afraid of what would happen if they were alone; she was afraid they’d lose their progress to some stupid fight again.

This time felt different than any other date they had been on in the last few weeks. It was simple, no pressure at all. Of course, it really wasn’t a date; they were only staying the night at Steve’s house, just like they used to. It was the first time she’d stayed with him since everything happened, but she wanted to.

Jess was laying in the middle of the bed and Steve was fumbling through some movies while the mixtape she had made him after their first date played from the radio in the corner. Foreigner’s I Want to Know What Love Is filled the silence of the room and made Jess’ heart flutter.

It made her feel the same way she felt on that night when she came home from their first date to Benny’s. There was an instant connection in that old diner that night. They’d stayed out a little later—probably a lot later—than she had told Hop, just sitting in their booth for hours, talking about God only knows what. The last thing she expected was for her dad to show up to Benny’s—uniform and all—and flash his police lights to get their attention.

Of course, he lectured both of them about coming home on time, but Jess couldn’t wipe the smile off her face. She was as happy as she could be when Hop made her come home with him; she was even content without getting that first goodnight kiss she’d been looking forward to for so long. I Want to Know What Love Is was the first song that played on the radio of Hop’s Chevy Blazer and it sent butterflies through Jess’ stomach. That’s when she knew Steve was the one.

“Jess? Did you hear me?” Steve asked, breaking her from her thoughts as he waived two movies in front of her face. “The Shining or E.T.?”

“I—Uh—The Shining is fine.” she said, shooting him a forced smile. “Sorry, I was lost in thought for a second.”

“Are you alright?” he questioned while dropping the movies to sit next to her, narrowing his eyes as she nodded quickly. “What were you thinking about?”

“This song.” she laughed, shaking her head.

“What about it?” Steve implored, quirking an eyebrow at her short answer.

“I heard this song right after our first date. When my dad stole me away from Benny’s, remember?” she said, letting out a small giggle as he smiled at her. “I heard it and I—I immediately thought about you. About how—how I already liked you so much.”

“Yeah? That night was pretty amazing.” Steve chuckled, looking down at her to see the struggle beneath the smile she was giving him. “I knew that I was in so deep that night, you had me head over heels for you.”

“Yeah, I think I could say the same about you.” she said nervously as Steve rested his hand atop hers in a soothing way. “That was the night I realized how I had already fallen in love with you.”

“Really?” he asked hopefully, his heart skipping a beat as she said love.

“Yeah, it really was.” she sighed.

The room was dead silent for a moment that felt like an eternity. The words for how she felt were on the tip of her tongue, and she finally felt like she could say them out loud. A small smile appeared on her face as she locked eyes with Steve again.

“It really was the night I knew that I knew I loved you, and that I wouldn’t ever stop loving you.” she said softly, inching closer to him as she spoke.

Steve could feel his heart beating in his ears as she got closer, he could feel her breath against his skin. He felt paralyzed for a moment as he took it all in, he’d honestly never expected to hear her say that to him again.

“I love you, Jess.” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, as if saying it too loud would make it all go away.

She couldn’t handle it anymore, she couldn’t stop herself from holding back her feelings anymore. At first, she’d told herself that he needed to earn her love, but he’d done more than earn it at this point. Jess could tell how many sleepless nights he’d had, how many painstaking hours he’d put into getting everything right just so she could be happy again. And she loved him for it. Her lips pressed against his in a kiss that was deeper than any they had shared since everything happened, so much tension had built up for this moment.

Steve’s breath caught in his throat as he leaned into the kiss, caught by surprise at how passionate it was. He accepted the kiss easily and wrapped his arms around her waist to pull her closer. The kiss had everything about Steve that she loved wizzing through her mind. His smile, his need to make her happy all the time, his horribly funny jokes, his ridiculously well-kept his everything, really. Relief filled Jess’ chest as she deepened the kiss once more.

“Are you okay?” Steve asked, pulling away after feeling a tear from her cheek slip onto his.

“Yes, Steve. I’m just—just really happy that I gave you this second chance.” she said, pulling him in for another kiss before he could get a word in.

Steve was still hesitant with his kisses, though. He didn’t want to push her, he didn’t know exactly what she wanted. His hesitancy was proven wrong when her kisses grew hungrier and she pulled herself into Steve’s lap. It was the last thing he was expecting in the moment, but he wasn’t going to stop her. Jess’ arms clung to Steve’s neck while straddling him, as if she’d fall if she let go. Her hips began to grind against his and a throaty moan escaped Steve’s lips, but he stopped her for a moment. He gently rolled her onto her back, taking his place between her legs as he continued the heated kiss.

“Let me do the work, baby.” he murmured, trailing kisses along the crook of her neck. “I wanna show you how much you mean to me.”

“Fuck, Stevie.” she whimpered after feeling his length pressed against her core.

Steve took his time in stripping Jess down, making sure to take in every inch of her as he did, like he’d never see her like this again. Every few seconds he’d mumble about how beautiful she looked while kissing down her body, making sure to do so gently. He wanted to savor the moment, to make sure she’d never forget this day.

Jess was left in only her underwear as Steve tugged his own pants and t-shirt off, his eyes locked on her the whole time. She reached around to unclasp her bra, throwing it to the floor after pulling it off. Steve’s lips were on her chest as soon as he finished taking his clothes off, leaving small hickeys and nips along her breasts while toying with her nipples. His teasing was always painstaking, he’d drag out their foreplay as long as he could to make her orgasms better than she’d experienced with anyone else.

His lips trailed down her stomach and stopped at the hem of her panties. He gazed up at her for a moment as if to ask for permission, but the look of lust in her eyes was all he needed to continue what he was doing. Steve hooked his thumbs under the waistband of her panties and tugged then off, leaving her completely naked below him.

A moan of surprise escaped her lips when Steve touched her, his finger rubbing agonizingly slow circles along her clit. His tongue striped along her entrance, another gasp coming from her lips. She was feeling impatient, though. She wanted all of Steve in the moment, she didn’t care about foreplay.

“Steve.” she called to him, his eyes snapping to hers as he stopped his motions. “I don’t care about the foreplay right now. I want you, please.”

Steve took a deep breath at her forward words, but nodded rapidly. He wasted no time and hastily grabbed a condom from his nightstand, ripping it open with his teeth as she pulled his boxers down. Steve rolled the condom up his length as his heart raced, any nerves that he had felt disappearing in the moment. He leaned down to kiss her gingerly while lining himself up with her entrance.

“I love you, Steve.” she said softly, running her hand through his hair as she looked up at him with a genuine love-filled expression.

“I love you, Jess.” he said before pressing his lips to hers once again, sliding into her slowly.

He groaned as he bottomed out within her, a feeling of bliss taking over his body. It was unlike any other time they’d had sex really, it felt special. It was like she was fully there again, like she’d finally opened up to him again. Steve intertwined his fingers with hers, locking eyes with her as he began his slow and steady strokes.

The feeling was damn near overwhelming for both of them, honestly. It had been so long since they’d gotten a release and the desire was heightened by the immense love between them again. Steve broke one of his hands away from hers and slid it between them, circling her clit once more. Jess buried her face in Steve’s neck and let out a sinful moan, wrapping her legs around Steve’s waist as she felt herself near her climax already. Steve could tell she was close, and that was enough to put him close to the edge as well.

“C’mon baby, cum with me.” Steve coaxed, continuing his thrusts. “Fuck, you feel so good.”

Steve’s word were the only convincing she needed to reach that point, and he wasn’t far behind. Soon enough, the two of them were a panting mess as they came down from their highs. Steve rolled off of her to throw the condom away, then pulled her back into his embrace. He stared down at her lovingly, a smile gracing his face as she cuddled into him. She looked like she was thinking a little too hard, but it seemed to be something happy considering the small smile on her lips.

“What’re you thinking about?” Steve asked, brushing some hair from in front of her eyes.

“Us.” she sighed peacefully. “We’ll be alright, Steve.”

“Yeah, we’ll be alright.” he repeated, as if to ease his own nerves.

The couple laid there in silence for a long while, soaking in the love that filled the room. He had finally earned her trust and Jess was happy once again. They had been through hell and back together now, but they were content. Their time walking that extremely fine line was far from over, but they would do so expertly now.

tags: @sourapplebaby @harringtown @queenofthehairharrington @charmed-asylum @jxnehxpper @lemonypink @hystericalmedicine @a-magey @daddystevee @sledgy14 @m-blasterrr @madiebrock @pocsimcc @karasong @heart-eye-harrington @igotmadskills

[reddeaddamnation]

Imagine their reaction to someone hitting on your daughter/ When they find out your daughter has a boyfriend: [preference] pt. 2

Alexios

You didn't even realize when Alexios stopped walking beside you and had started walking rather angrily towards a young couple in the distance. "Okay, just one more thing I need over ther- Alexios?" You looked behind yourself only to realize he was going to get himself in trouble again... "Alexios!" You yelled after him, but he didn't turn around, so you had to follow him and try to stop him. When you got closer, you finally realized what made him this mad. Your daughter was holding hands and giggling with an unknown to you boy and didn't tell you that she was even seeing someone. "Who do you think you are?!" Alexios yelled, startling the both of them. Your daughter quickly managed to get over the surprise and boldly stepped up to her father "Dad, meet my boyfriend." She told him, her attitude in such a situation, leaving him wonder-stricken. "Alexios, what the hell?" You caught up to him and your eyes scanned the situation until they landed on the unknown boy. "Who is this, D/N?" You asked. "My boyfriend." Your daughter answered with the same expression. You raised your eyebrows in surprise and looked at your husband who was still in the same shock he was the first time he heard that statement. "We are going to have a long talk later, D/N..." He muttered.

Malik al'Sayf

Malik promised to behave during the dinner with his daughter's boyfriend. But there was always that thought in the back of your mind that things might go wrong. "So. How long have you and D/N been together?" Malik asked expectantly, a stoic expression on his face. The boy gulped before answering "Um... Three months now." He answered. “What are your intentions with her?” Malik continued asking, as if he was the policeman and the boyfriend - the suspect. “I-I...I hope to take our relationship to the next level.” the boy answered again, fear in his voice. Malik’s eye twitched slightly and in that moment you knew he was going to say something weird. “If I ever find out you got her pregnant, you can expect to be dead in the next several days! I may have only one arm, but that won’t stop me from killing you!”

La Volpe

“What the hell is wrong with you?!“ you yelled at your husband angrily “You can’t just break into the boy’s house because you decided to!“ As soon as you found out Volpe was going to break into your daughter’s boyfriend’s house in search of who knows what or catch him doing whatever just so he can have something to accuse the boy of, even though you thought he was a pretty good and respectful candidate for your daughter. You patiently waited for Gilberto to come home, arms and legs crossed and the most furious expression you could muster up. “My love, I’d say that is my everyday job.“ He answered with a cheeky smirk, taking off his hood and cape. “Don’t play around with me right now! What were you even looking for?“ you kept yelling, now angrily gesticulating with your hands. “Anything that could prove he isn’t worthy. Letters, books, diaries...“ Gilberto said, suspicion in his voice “Oh my gosh, you read his diary?!“ you slapped your forehead, disbelief screaming in your mind and soul that he could have gotten so far. “I had to know.“ Volpe shrugged his shoulders. “And?“ you raised your eyebrow expectantly “Did you find anything incriminating?“ The thief bit his lower lip, obviously guilty, but too proud to admit it. “Well...no.“ he murmured. “What was that?“ you mocked, leaning closer to hear him say it again. “He’s clean...“ Oh, what a lecture was waiting for him...

Yusuf Tazim

“She has a what?!“ Yusuf asked loudly, more because he didn’t hear it the first time rather than out of disbelief or anger. “[D/N] has a boyfriend. I saw them together the other day.“ you repeated nervously, wondering what his next reaction was going to be. Luckily, you caught him in a good mood, lying back on a pile of pillows and wanting nothing more than some rest after a long day. “A boyfriend?“ he furrowed his brows, letting the information sink in. For a moment you thought he was going to get angry and start ranting about how it isn’t her time and how he isn’t ready to let go of his little girl yet, but his next words sent a wave of shock through you. “Aah, good for her, good for her! We should invite him some time to talk then! I’ll sit down, have a drink with him! Tell him I even invite him to share a hookah with me!“ (A/N: It was a tradition in the Ottoman empire that when someone invites someone to smoke hookah with them, the other person can’t refuse, because it’s a sign of great respect and trust) It was your turn to be baffled and silent, because you didn’t expect such an outcome, but still relief washed over you. “A-alright, I’ll...“ you spoke slowly, eyebrow raised “I’ll make sure to tell them both.“

Adewale

You could tell a lot of thoughts were going through your husband’s mind the moment you mentioned [D/N] having a boyfriend. And it was true. The man was angry, because his daughter didn’t tell him personally; distrusting towards the boyfriend; anxious for their future and afraid his little bird will fly away from the nest too soon. And when Edward was telling him about the same fears he has for his own daughter, Ade merely brushed him off and told him he has to get used to it sooner or later. Now, the next time they go out for a drink, he will be the one talking about those things and Edward will comfort him that everything will be alright. Ultimately, he decided he wasn’t going to make it too much of a big deal. “You know what, [Y/N]?” he sighed heavily “I’ll give him a chance. As long as she’s happy, I’m happy too.” a smile stretched across his lips, but quickly faded and a serious, menacing expression replaced it, which could have scared any potential candidate for his daughter’s hand. “But if I see him doing anything suspicious, I’m afraid he won’t be seen again.” You giggled and wrapped your arms around his neck, giving his cheek a peck “Whatever you say, darling.”

Christopher Gist

“I say, my good lad, it’s a pleasure to meet you.“ Gist extended his hand to shake his apparently new potential son-in-law’s. A seemingly friendly smile was on his face and you thought everything was going to be alright during this dinner. The boy took the bait and shook his hand with a smile of his own and all the nervousness from [D/N] vanished as soon as she witnessed this. “Come, have a glass of whiskey. And my personal favorite, as well! You drink whiskey don’t you?“ Your husband asked, already pouring him a glass without waiting for an answer. “Of course, sir.“ The boy took the glass from Gist, still oblivious of the trap. “Often?“ Christopher tried to keep the friendly smile on his lips, but you saw he was getting irked already. “No, sir. Only on occassion.“ The answer seemed to please him, but he wasn’t ready to let go yet. “How about a smoke?“ The older man pulled out a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket, which he especially bought for this, even though he himself doesn’t smoke. “No thank you, sir, I don’t smoke.“ The politeness of this boy charmed you, but your husband wasn’t so easy trusting. That answer pleased him as well and he put the cigarettes back in his pocket. “You know, you remind me of my own youthful days, son. I used to be outside more than inside, myself. Always going somewhere with someone or even just walking down a street to count how many steps it took until I reach the end of it. I can even recall my mother, my own mother, asking who I was when I entered my house one day.“ Gist laughed loudly, making everyone around him uncomfortable, but you still let out a small giggle so he doesn’t laugh alone. “Must have been quite a moment.“ [D/N]’s boyfriend chuckled awkwardly. “And you, lad? Seems to me [D/N] is almost never home when she’s with you.“ the young couple blushed furiously and your daughter yelled “Dad!“ You sighed and pulled him out of the room to whisper “Don’t embarass yourself to look for things that aren’t even there!“

Pierre Bellec

One evening, when Pierre burst through the door of your apartment, you swore you have never seen him this scared even in the most dire of situations he has gotten himself into. “[Y/N], you are not gonna believe this!” he panted heavily. Apparently he had been running for awhile just to get these surreal news to you before he is killed along the way. You raised your eyebrow expectantly. “It’s [D/N]... I just saw her with a...a...” he bit his lip, not even wanting to say the word because it would taint his very soul. “A what, cherie?” you insisted, interest peaked. “She has a boyfriend!” Your laugh wasn’t something he expected or anticipated, because he stared at you, baffled. “So? She’s at that age, Pierre. There’s nothing wrong going on.” you kept giggling in his direction. “How can you laugh in a time like this! She’s still too young!” he insisted. “Dear, however old [D/N] is, she will always seem like a child to you. Don’t worry. Even if she has a boyfriend, it doesn’t change the fact that you are her father and she loves you for it.” Your words seemed to touch his heart, because his expression softened and he didn’t utter another word, but merely walked over to the couch and slumped down on it, almost like he was defeated. “I don’t trust him.” were his next words and you knew for the rest of the evening he was going to talk only about that.

Henry Green

You didn’t doubt him for a second. Henry was very open minded about the situation and surprisingly, he found many topics to talk about with his potential son-in-law and soon found out the two have a lot in common. You knew he wasn’t going to get jealous or anything and didn’t have to worry about your husband acting weird and suspicious towards the boy. [D/N] was confident as well and even happy she and her boyfriend were at such a point where they were meeting each other’s parents. Conversation was easy going, you were laughing and smiling... Henry even offered to the boy to invite his parents next time to join them as well. “I only hope to see [D/N] in a wedding dress. I’m sure she will be beautiful.” Henry told the boy, watching him expectantly, but the only answer he received was a loud “Dad!” from [D/N] and her boyfriend blushing like a tomato, avoiding everyone’s eyes.

[whitetigerdemoness]

Penknight is going to see his boyfriend, and he's not taking no for an answer.

Blemir Anciel was created by https://bloodwebcircus.tumblr.com/post/611252715628249088 in our Nathamrc Dicord, https://discord.gg/jC2j5SU !

Most stars exist in clusters, or at least binary pairs. Our sun is a rare single star. It is because of this life is able to exist in our solar system, but how lonely the sun must be.

Masterpost 

Nathaniel wondered when the exact point his life got so weird was. The answer, probably, was sitting at his kitchen table next to his boyfriend and having a stare down with Ladybug. Ladybug! Sitting! At! His! Kitchen! Table! Not that the small area off to the side of his tiny apartment kitchen was that impressive to begin with. The table was cosy, just big enough for two people to be comfortable. There were only four chairs because they had come as a set with the table and Nathaniel had just never bothered getting rid of them, despite that being three chairs too many. His father was a busy CEO of a weapons development conglomerate and spent most of the year overseas on business, preferring to stay at a hotel rather than with his son when he was in Paris. Nathaniel’s mother had passed from cancer when he was ten, so he essentially lived alone. Up until last year he had lived in a slightly bigger apartment with a live-in nanny, but at sixteen his father had decided he was old enough to take care of himself and happily cut costs by firing the nanny and moving Nathaniel into his current one bedroom apartment.  Fully aware that this was not the most legal of situations, the red head fervently hoped Ladybug would be more concerned with the Sentimonster giving her attitude than reporting his dad to child protective services. 

 Said Sentimonster, Penknight, had shown up on his fifth floor balcony and let himself in with a huff, Ladybug not far behind him. Penknight had promptly swept Marc, who blushed a little too much for Nathaniel’s jealousy, into his arms and kissed the top of his head. Ladybug was lecturing him on being out in public and returning to Paon’s side instead, which sounded like it had been going on for a while. Penknight pointedly ignored her until Nathaniel offered her refreshments in a pause in the ranting. Now the two were sitting at his table, untouched glasses of water beside them, battling with silent wills instead of words. Marc just looked bewildered at the entire thing. Nathaniel was honestly feeling the same. 

 “Penknight.” Ladybug ground out after a time. “You cannot just wander about as you please. Especially after what that new Hawkmoth did. You’re a well known akuma, you’ll send people into a panic!” Which would give the Office of Akuma Affairs even more ammo in their growing anti-hero platform, she left unsaid. She didn’t need to. Both Marc and Nathaniel were intimately aware of the OAA’s propaganda, being frequent targets themselves. 

 “This new Hawkmoth is EXACTLY why I should be here, and not hiding away with Paon!” Penknight slammed a fist on the table, causing the two other boys to jump. “You saw what she did! You think I’m going to leave Marc unprotected with a literal super powered murderer running about? What if she decides anyone with a connection to the old Hawkmoth needs to go?” Ladybug paled at that, and so did Nathaniel. Ladybug swallowed and composed herself.

 “All the more reason to be with Paon right now. She’s just lost her husband and is in no shape to defend herself. Both her and her son are in danger and as much as I hate to admit it, you are a tricky foe to defeat.”  Penknight wasn’t swayed an inch by her flattery. 

“Paon and Adrien have that huge bodyguard who can use the Peacock if he needs to. Marc has nobody.” Thanks for your concern, Nathaniel thought dryly. “If you’re so worried about her, why are you here instead of there?” Penknight crossed his arms, leaning back in his chair.

 “Because SOMEONE has to keep an eye on you! You destroyed several city blocks last time you were left unattended!” 

 “That was only after that fox bitch stole Marc from me, which as I hear it isn’t possible right now with her being on life support. That someone should cut.” He muttered the last part under his breath, but Ladybug heard it anyway.

 “See? That’s exactly what I’m talking about. I don’t need to wake up tomorrow to the headline of Lila Rossi being murdered in her sleep by a rampaging Aku-Sentimonster!” She corrected.

 “Why not.” Penknight grumbled sulkily. 

 “BECAUSE MURDER IS WRONG!” Ladybug exploded. Marc shrank back at her outburst, and Penknight growled, actually growled at her. 

 “Look um, L-Ladybug? Penknight can stay here if he wants. It’s not any trouble.” Nathaniel hesitantly offered in the tense silence that followed.

 “That’s not the issue here.” Ladybug dragged her hand over her face with a sigh. “The issue is Penknight is a loose cannon who only cares about his own agenda, and doesn’t stop to think about the people who might get hurt along the way. I’m also pretty sure he would follow Marc home before he stayed here, which would be awkward to explain to his parents…” The boy in question winced. 

 “My parents are overseas on business right now. It’s my older sister we would have to worry about, and she barely tolerates Nath.” Blemir Anciel was eighteen going on thirty. Mature and serious for her age, she looked after her younger brother while their parents were away and their eldest sibling gone for college most of the year. Nathaniel cringed at the memory of her chasing him out of the house with a broom after she had walked in on him and Marc making out on his bed. From then on the red headed boy was allowed no farther than the living room, and the pair were strictly supervised the entire time. The only reason Marc was allowed anywhere near Nathaniel’s apartment was because they hadn’t told her he lived alone. 

 “I’m not scared of your sister.” Penknight said, stroking Marc’s hair fondly. “It would take more than a broom to chase me off.” Wait a second.

“How do you even know about that?” Nathaniel asked, “That happened after Hawkmoth was defeated, and you didn’t come from me this time...how would you have my memories?” Penknight rolled his eyes.

 “Magic, dummy.”

 “Back on topic,” Ladybug interjected, “You can’t stay here. You need to come back to the Agreste mansion with me.”

 “No.”

 “That wasn’t a request.”

 “That wasn’t a negotiation.” 

 “This isn’t- Ugh!” Ladybug exclaimed, standing up and pacing the small area. “I do not have the manpower to assign you a babysitter right now!”

 “Then don’t. I’m a big boy. This is only an issue because you’re making it one.”  Penknight shot back.

 “Except when you stab an OAA member for harassing Marc, it does become my problem.”

 “Maybe you should just let me stab them. Can’t be a problem if they’re all dead.” Ladybug looked like she was going to strangle him for that comment.

 “Um, Penknight?” Marc laid a hand on his arm. “Maybe you should go with Ladybug? Just for now? She might trust you more if you comply…” Penknight hesitated, and Ladybug looked like a lightbulb went off in her head.

 “That’s it, Marc! You have his Amokatized object right? You can control him! Please tell him to stop being stubborn and come with me.” Penknight looked stricken, and Marc flinched.

 “I can’t- I won’t order him around like that! That would be like taking away his free will!” Ladybug rocked back like the words had physical force. She was silent for a moment before replying.

 “You’re not taking away his free will. Just...making him do something he doesn’t want to? Ugh, it doesn’t sound any better when I say it like that.” She rubbed her forehead. “Penknight, sometimes we have to do things we don’t want because they’re the right thing to do.”

 “The ‘right thing to do’ for me is different from the right thing for you, Ladybug.” Penknight said firmly. “The right thing for me to do is to stay with the person I was literally brought into being to protect.” Marc blushed slightly at that while Ladybug looked thoughtful. Nathaniel just had a sinking feeling in his stomach. Penknight looked so cool when he said that, how was Nathaniel supposed to compare?

 “Listen. My place is here, and yours is with your boyfriend. I know you’re trying to be responsible Marinette but I don’t need looking after.” Nathaniel opened his mouth to tell Penknight exactly what he thought of the other man implying that Marc was his boyfriend, roundabout as it was, when the last part of that sentence caught up with him. 

 “MARINETTE?!” He and Marc exclaimed at the same time. 

 “Penknight!” She cried out. 

 “What? Chloe can know but they can’t?” The knight huffed.

 “Chloe is a miraculous holder!” Ladybug (Marinette?!) exclaimed.

 “So was Marc, for a little bit. By your own rules you can’t even let Chloe have her miraculous again because everyone knows who she is. Hell, that goes for pretty much your entire team. If who knows what Gabriel told the new Hawkmoth before...you know.” He mimed drawing a line over his neck. Ladybug looked stricken, and then pensive. 

 “Gabriel is….was...a strong willed man. He wouldn’t have helped her. We are worried though…” Ladybug sighed and sat back down at the table. “I guess you should know since it looks like you’re getting wrapped up in this. We suspect Lila stole the butterfly miraculous before her accident.” 

 “What, how?” Marc asked, getting over his shock just a hair sooner than Nathaniel at learning that Marinette was Ladybug. Which honestly made sense now that he thought about it. Marinette was sweet, and kind, and amazing and- oh. Maybe he shouldn’t let his thoughts wander like that when important exposition was being dumped.

 “She came to my room when I wasn’t there the day of the accident. The next day I noticed the butterfly was missing from the miracle box. We of course searched her belongings extensively after, but we could never find it. Now a new, female Hawkmoth with a personal grudge against me shows up? That can’t be coincidence. Not with the Miraculous involved.” Ladybug just looked...tired.

 “If it is Lila, that’s even more reason for me to stay with Marc. She hates him maybe more than she hates you.” Penknight pointed out. Ladybug folded her hands in front of her.

 “Except Lila is currently in a coma in an intensive care ward, monitored around the clock by staff, security, and cameras. If it is her, we have no idea how she’s doing this.”

 “Could she have akumatized someone and used their power to make a body double?” Marc asked. 

 “She might have, but I’ve cast the miraculous cure more than once since she’s been in her coma. That would have revealed any trickery for sure by now.” Ladybug looked pensive. “There’s just too many unknown variables…and my entire team is compromised. That wasn’t a problem with Hawkmoth gone, but now that the threat has resumed...maybe I need to build a new team. If this new person is being influenced by Lila in any way, I can’t let you have the goat miraculous again, Marc but…” She trailed off looking thoughtful. 

 “What about you, Nathaniel? Think you have what it takes to be a miraculous holder?” Nathaniel felt his mental processes grind to a halt. 

 “Me?!” He exclaimed. Ladybug laughed slightly at his outburst. 

 “Don’t say yes or no right now, but please think about it. It would make me feel better if there was a miraculous holder keeping an eye on Penknight, and seeing as you’re the person who will probably be around him most besides Marc, you’re a good bet.”

 “No he’s not. He’ll fuck it up and probably lose the thing within a week.” Penknight sneered. Nathaniel wilted into his chair. The Sentimonster was right, he always screwed up when it really counted. Marc wasn’t having any of that though. He stood from his chair and walked around the table to put his hands on Nathaniel’s shoulders, pointedly glaring at Penknight.

 “Nathaniel would make a fantastic hero.” Marc said firmly, leaving no room for argument. Penknight looked like he swallowed a lemon, not wanting to argue with Marc but also clearly not accepting that statement. 

“Wielding a miraculous is definitely a learning curve.” Ladybug admitted. “But if the clumsiest, most awkward mess up in class can do it I think Nathaniel will be fine.” She said with a slight chuckle. 

 “You’re not awkward!” Nathaniel said, realizing she was talking about herself.

 “You’re awkward.” Marc mumbled, bapping him on the head slightly for how fast he was to come to her defense. Ok so maybe that crush on Marinette wasn’t one hundred percent gone. Maybe Marc knew. Maybe Marc was the most wonderful and understanding person in the world for putting up with him anyway. At the end of the day, Nathaniel was loyal to his boyfriend and some silly grade school crush was not getting in the way of that. Some silly sentimonster that looked a little too pleased when Nathaniel got lightly scolded might though.

 “Sure, my nickname is “clumsynette” because of the irony factor that I’m actually very graceful.” Ladybug continued like he hadn’t just made a fool of himself. She got to her feet with a sigh. “Fine. You’ve convinced me. Penknight can stay for now, but if I hear even a hint of him making trouble I’m going to ask you to give me his amokitized object so I can give it to Paon.”

 “What, you’re not just going to break it and purify me?” Ladybug looked really sad for a moment, as if recalling an unpleasant memory.  

 “I would never do that if I had a choice. Most Sentimonsters are just rouge collections of feelings and desire, with no real intelligent thought. Ones like you and...well, ones like you are alive Penknight. The way I see it, removing your amok is the same as murder.” Ladybug walked to the balcony door. “I will be checking in on you guys for an update tomorrow at the latest. Try to stay out of trouble.” And then with a toss of her yoyo, she was gone. The three remaining occupants of the tiny apartment exchanged glances. Marc sighed and wrapped his arms around Nathaniel’s shoulders, resting his chin on the top of the seated boy’s head.

 “My sister is not going to be pleased about this.”

[ego-driven-one-wing-angel]

1.3 BLOOD_WATER | Sephiroth

A/N: Here’s chapter 3, sorry for the long wait but I hope you guys enjoy!!

TAGS:  Slow Burn, Mild Language, Angst, Future Bed Sharing, Future Angst, Original Male and Female Characters. Mostly Slow Burn.

CHAPTER ONE FOUND HERE

1.3 - Chapter III

🌓 - Boredom

“...It is a proud privilege to be a soldier–a good soldier

…[with] discipline, self-respect, pride in his unit and his country,

a high sense of duty and obligation to comrades and to his superiors,

and a self-confidence born of demonstrated ability.”

-George S. Patton Jr.

[TRACK: Legend (Tangerine Dreams) - The Dance]

Eight months before, Citlali would have found herself begging to be brought onto a mission with a first class SOLDIER, the ones where danger was inevitable and where she could really practice the skills she was taught, but now, sitting in the back of a flyer with fan-favorite Sephiroth, she wanted to hide back in the training rooms for just a little bit longer. The air was undeniably thick with fear. Sweat coated her fingers, her shoulders shaking any time the helicopter flew over a thick sheet of green forestry below them.

Wutai’s cities inhabited the west hemisphere of Gaia. Days, perhaps weeks away from the comforting smog of Midgar. Much more natural and secluded, where foliage left the streets in darkness, how the moonlight pitied the travelers who dared travel alone, where mako energy ceased to exist in the stone structures of the king and the ninjas who inhabited the villages. Completely different from the bustling city of Midgar’s plate.

But the shiver of war kept her from believing reality, at some point the ships would stop and Citlali’s skills would be put to show. Finally meeting up with the other three helicopters now following close behind. With John and his fresh set of troops, the other second class partnered alongside her, and enough infantrymen to cause panic to any low-leveled village in Wutai. She was expecting war, and war she was going to receive.

That morning’s lecture went through one ear and out the other, as disappointing as it sounded, and it was completely obvious to all of them she hadn’t heard one word he was speaking. Citlali tried to keep her eyes open as one of the lower class packed her sword, how easily she fell asleep for a few minutes the moment her back hit the wall. Citlali made sure to focus on John’s unnaturally uptight, early bird commanding, but it proved difficult when the sandman’s dreams filled her mind.

Don’t do this, don’t do that, keep your communication set on and don’t run off on your own. Simple. The usual bantering she always heard before a mission to fight the beasts outside the Sector Five slums. She only wished it was something else, a little more demanding and forewarning of what was yet to unfold. Something. Maybe ridicule her for her hair, the lack of supplies in her belts, if her sword was sharpened to standard.

Citlali’s heart plummeted. Had her sword been repaired since the last fight? She couldn’t remember. If only John was there to remind her if she had gone through her task list as she was instructed. She tried to go through the day, her battle in Sector Seven, the food on the train, her shower, the report. Her hands clenched, shaking, and it seemed her nervousness was beginning to become contagious.

“Stop.” Citlali let out a deep breath as Sephiroth let the words trail into her ears, through her limbs, burrowing in the quiet ears of the rest of the troops sitting behind her. She had never heard him say a word. Only watched him on the screens in her grandmother’s home. Seen him in silent pictures. The silver-haired Soldier who seemed to be rising in the ranks faster than anyone else would have thought. “Stop shaking,” he said again, and Citlali was too scared to think what would happen if she hadn’t, so she did.

Swallowing hard as she tried to focus on something else. Like breakfast pancakes or the sweet music that played during fairs in Sector Eight. She never got to go, but she always heard them. Down below as she focused on training in her apartment or reading on the different species located in Gaia. All the useless information piled into her head that seemed to be doing nothing for her except making a fool of herself in the eyes of one of the best SOLDIER ShinRa had to offer.

“You’re making it worse,” Sephiroth’s voice was the only thing filling the air other than the deep helicopter buzz above them. Deep and articulated, matched his outer demeanor almost to a perfect tee.

“Shaking.” He further explained, the uncanny ice-green of his eyes hitting Citlali dead on causing a bit of that fear to build back in her adrenaline. “You’ll get tensed up and you won’t want to move when we land.”

Neat, she wanted to say, but it was hard to speak. A lump caught in her throat piled with the anxiety and overwhelming sense of doom made her want to stay silent. The first time ever a situation had her mouth kept clean shut, and she was alright with it. It was hard to say anything in front of Sephiroth anyway. One wrong word and her reputation would fall in his eyes for the rest of her career.  Similar to how John was known as “hard-ass-Shir” to a majority of the second class.

Much thanks to Citlali who had started that nickname.

Now anyone who had come into ShinRa had already an idea of what he was like before even knowing him. A hard-ass who made sure all your reports were painfully honest with the sting of a slap courtesy to all the pretty adjectives he’d sprinkle in to prove his point. How many of her files had the word reckless filtered in? Or something vaguely similar?

Reckless-Citlali didn’t have as much as a ring to it, but she bet it wasn’t going to stop John from using it in their training sessions. That especially dry sense of humor that pissed people off. How tasteless it had become as the years passed them both. But she shouldn’t have been too upset, everyone in ShinRa had some bitter form of humor. Either especially dry or dark, or both. Citlali wondered where she fit in.

Where Sephiroth fit in.

She tried not to make it obvious as her eyes fell upon him.

Two years ago she would have done anything to find herself in her current position. Sitting less than three feet away, the questions of a fangirl setting in her mind and the idea that any woman in the Silver Elite would be begging to find themselves in Citlali’s place. Oh, how the other girls would kill her if she didn’t make at least a single move, or worse, kick her out of the club.

Sephiroth no longer focused on the objects outside the window, instead, kept his eyes shut, as if he was merely sleeping in his seat, arms crossed over his chest, still, his shoulders moving impeccably slow compared to the vibrations of the floor.  Unlike the other soldiers resting, whose bodies were trembling from the helicopter buzz.

If it was anyone else, she would have commented on it.

John perhaps. He was already used to the exaggerated tales and theories coming from her mouth, how those white lies coated most of her stories, the complaining and uninterested whine in training rooms. A perfect example of an irritating comrade. No wonder John tried to keep her busy. One spare second and she would be back as a thorn in his side pestering him like a toddler.

Citlali tapped the boy on her right. Quietly keeping to himself as he read a book, Loveless, before he noticed the gentle taps on his arm. Silas Chapman. A 3rd class SOLDIER who had been in the same ranks as her since she joined the ShinRa Army. They were roughly the same age, but you couldn’t tell that by looks alone.

A stark difference really. She was tinier than average. Stunted since grade school and never left the adolescent age of thirteen in both looks and personality. Silas was big. Much like John must have been at that age. Thick arms of pure muscle, sharp features, scars littering his skin in glistening wounds, the cold eyes of a soldier with nothing to lose. Both Silas and John could throw her out a window without breaking a sweat. Overall intimidating, and it was stupid for someone like Citlali to press those buttons.

Her lesson should have been learned the first time she had come in contact with Silas, and it started with a fist to her face on the second day of training. Easy punch. Silas hadn’t hesitated.

The days were much easier then.

“Want to play rock, paper, scissors?” She asked, Silas’s eyebrows furrowed. “Or thumb wars? I can play whatever you want to play.”

He shook his head immediately no. “Aren’t you too old to be asking questions like that?”

Lame.