#like it’s shutting down in a few weeks
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As a rooster teeth fan……. Girl what are you doing
#like it’s shutting down in a few weeks#did we learn nothing#just bc it worked for collegehumor#which was around for almost 20 years and had a large dedicated following and stock of comedians to produce content
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Imagine if you were a gay or bi man who tried a certain firefighter show because of all the attention it was getting for one of its mains having a later in life bi awakening.....and between seasons you ventured into its fandom in search of material to tide you over til the next one. And you're greeted by a deluge of posts and fics that are just cheerfully homophobic towards one half of the newly out bi character's canon relationship on the basis of 'well he's not the RIGHT gay guy' and pushing the idea that actually its fine to cheat on him because Reasons and he's sexually predacious based on......behind the scenes implications people have divined like they're reading fucking tea leaves.
But don't get it twisted....this fandom, like all fandoms, really cares about representation!
Sorry not sorry, but we really need to kill this idea that fandoms are welcoming and inviting and inherently progressive when they're frequently insular and reductive as fuck. Every single fandom I've been in has had major trends of people doubling down on their own headcanons and fanon interpretations of the characters and willfully enacting trends aimed at running off people who like the 'wrong' characters (usually characters marginalized along one or multiple axes), like the characters in the 'wrong ways' or other bullshit.
Scott is a Bad Friend fics overtaking Teen Wolf fandom was not incidental, it was a FEATURE of the fandom, because the vast majority of that fandom did not want to share its space with anyone who had the nerve to like its main character. Survivors complaining about or criticizing the prevalance of rape fics in a certain fandom has in my experience always led to a reactionary UPTICK in those fics, with gems like 'this character can, will, must be raped' in the tags making it crystal clear that some of these fics exist because how fucking DARE anyone try and push forth a narrative not agreed upon by Fandom Main.
I could cite examples for so many other fandoms, with the commonalities always being that vast majorities in these fandoms are explicitly reacting defensively to being asked to be more mindful of fandom trends revolving around or exacerbating racism, homophobia, transphobia, rape or abuse apologia, ableism, etc....
With the most prolific fucking rallying cry across countless fandoms being "No the fuck we will NOT be doing that," because lolololol.....
Fandom is an inherently progressive space, didn't you hear?
#anyway this has been on my mind in general for a few weeks now#and its more about fandoms just being fandoms#and like....what if they werent though#these patterns migrate from one to another as fans migrate from fandom to fandom bringing their bullshit with them#like do people never get tired of just trying to call DIBS and claim fandoms for themselves while shutting out anyone else#who might have a lot to fucking offer if you werent being so gd intent on staking a claim instead of sharing perspectives#and exploring new possibilities?#and I know not everyone links certain problems with racist homophobic and other behaviors to my own issues with dark fic and rape and#abuse apologia but I do inherently see it as sharing large portions of venn diagrams even though I do not consider being a survivor to be#something that demarcates privilege in the way that axes of identity do#as its situationally based rather than inherently identity based#but the way it can affect and shape large parts of peoples' identities begets commonalities#but my point is just.....a big part of why I so often lump it in is specifically because of how people react to these things or#defend against criticism across the board#like most people know my stance on censorship and how my blood boils when its people who are throwing accusations of#censorship at those raising criticisms....#but the point is just.....think about what censorship actually IS in all practical senses of the word#its about shutting down conversations. limiting the flow of information the sharing of perspectives and experiences#THATS WHAT MAKES IT BAD#now......what about criticism inherently lends itself to any of those things if you DONT accept as a foregone conclusion that criticism#is only ever offered up in bad faith and meant as a silencing tactic#instead of just a request or offered avenue of ways for things to be done better rather than not at all?#who is ACTUALLY out here trying to shut down convos and limit possibilities?#is it really the people being critical of fandom behaviors and trends?#or the ones doubling down at the first hint of any criticism and aggressively ramping up how frequently and visibly they engage in#the criticized behaviors in efforts to drive people away or as a silencing tactic of their own?#just saying
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if cliché bad, why grey restraining tim from following lucy into the o.r. after spotting her being pushed in on a gurney so, so good????
#*carly catalogs#..... i'll shut up now#(actually no i won't) cause imagine tim finally caving into his emotions and breaking down in tears in gry's arms#ooohhohohoho i know it's extra cheesy but what is life without cheese anyway??????#i'm just picturing grey holding him back like 'hey hey hey bradford! stop! you can't be with her right now!'#omg and it would parallel so well with the time boden held kelly back from seeing shay after she got that first head injury#ya know from that one time her and gabby got crashed into while in the back of the ambulance#okay okay i swear i'll shut up about putting lucy in the hospital again#....... until i think of the next thing in a few minutes/hours/weeks/months whenever really#the rookie#sergeant grey#wade grey#tim bradford#lucy chen#chenford#otp: you know me so well
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#okay random story time i don't know why im narrating this or how i even stumbled upon this memory rn#but i generally do sad vents in the tags and for a change this is a funny one#so back in highschool (i say highschool but i mean junior college) i used to visit this park near my house a lot#i was an sg kid back then and the thing about parks there is that they're kinda beach-parks and they have the best cycling/running tracks#they're also really massive parks so i used to go often. sometimes bicycling. other times walking. yeah. the park was like my sanctuary#anyway. there are quite a few bike rental areas in the park and there was a cute lil shop next to this one particular rental place#and they sold like biscuits and water and icecreams and stuff and i went there a lot#and on one particular day i went there and there was this guy around my age part timing at that shop#now again this might be culture specific bc i dont see it in india but part timing in uni/pre-uni is pretty common is sg#a lot of shops and restaurants employ teenagers to twenty something ppl for part time jobs... anyway im just adding context#point is that i had walked to the park with my mum that day and she told me to go buy a couple icecreams so i went to the shop#and i saw this guy around my age and like. not to be a simp but this dude was so pretty?#like he saw someone had come to the counter so he looked up and shot a smile and i thought i got slapped by sunlight#i could spend the next several lines going on about his pretty tan skin and his glowing raven eyes but this is pathetic enough so ill stop#anyway he saw me and smiled really wide (customer service smile- i thought to myself) and i smiled back and asked for icecreams or whatever#and then this guy started getting chatty right. so he was all 'you come here (to the park) often right? ive seen you with your bike a lot'#see now. the problem with me is that i always think im bothering people. this poor dude was attempting to make conversation#and i was replying with one word answers#and i wasn't even realizing that he didnt want that. bc he kept asking more questions and i. kept. shutting them down.#then when he gave me the icecream he was all 'are you here alone? icecream alone is no fun... i could keep you company if you want..?'#which. he was being really cute about right. but because im so fucking dense i was all 'oh no i came with my mom actually'#and he went 'aw man' in this really cute but faux sad way which i didnt understand at the time and i left and then#after three full fucking days. i realized this man was tryna hit on me?#and then i went to the park like a week later and he was gone. poof. i even thought of asking the uncle in charge of that place#then i got too embarrassed and chickened out#yeah so turns out my neurodivergence neutralizes any sort of rizz that comes my way#i could've been chilling with a cute boyf rn but no😩 this is my destiny#megumi in the tags
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Metallic super chicks!
#stickers#sticker collection#Description by a friend!#Library stickers#Comics#dc superhero girls#Unknown brand#I'M BACK#I hope#Down to one post a day so hopefully that'll help#In theory these posts should take like. 5 min tops but they Often Do Not 😭#Fandom posting on my sticker blog#My brain just kinda Shut Down for a bit I have no real explanation#But I'm mostly functional so back to sticker posting!!!#Also side note. If any of yall come across any like affirmation stickers in the next few weeks#Can you send them my way?#I'm studying for a big career-necessitated exam thing and I need to hype myself up :'3#If u read this far into my tags then CONGRATION. you win a telepathic heart sticker#Sending it your way now <333#Shiny#Bunny's favorites#Fun#individuals#Characters
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kinda realizing that it was maybe bad for me that i spent so long dating someone who fundamentally looked down on me and treated me like i was too silly and irresponsible and fucked in the head to make my own decisions
#remembering i tried to break up with my ex bc i was desperately unhappy and lonely with them#and they just shut down the conversation and disparaged me for 'making everything into a big production for no reason'#only to dump me a few weeks later#like they didn't even respect me enough to permit me to end the relationship because they fundamentally didn't think of me as an equal#i feel so insane sometimes in my current relationship because i'm like oh you're literally going to respect my autonomy right now?#you're going to treat me like an equal partner and respect my right to want and feel and need different things than you do?????#and then i have to be like that's literally regular behavior why am i so impressed by it#personal nonsense#it's so weird having good interpersonal relationships and just being constantly reminded of how bad previous ones were#but that's how it works i guess#backdraft city here
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I got tagged by the lovely @sleepystede to make an adorable little picrew blorbo dude. Thank you for tagging me! 🥰
I was feelin' the spots. He looks like a little chicken stuck in a stress ball. Also this is a 10/10 accurate representation of me in a few weeks, glasses and noise cancelling headphones on, listening to @lindie-kninjaknitter's podfics while i wander about Japan ✌️
tagging: @jessystardust, @adickaboutspoons, @scorpiostarseed, @wickedlycaskett, @endevouring-to-surprise, @daria-meoi, @pumpkinspicepirates and sorry sorry sorry if i've tagged anyone who has already done it, and if I missed someone who would like to do it please just pretend that I'm better at this than I am and that I tagged you. (And if I keep tagging you for these things and you hate them, please tell me to stop.) *social anxiety jazz hands*
(I've been buried under mountains of uni work and only just realised that i've been tagged for a bunch of things! Sorry! I'm slowly toddling my way through them, thank you so much for thinking of me! ❤️)
#my little dude is so cute i love him#i feel like i need to go knit myself a two tone yellow polkadot colourwork sweater now to bring this shit to life#(side note i just discovered a yarn store that's only 30mins drive away and they have PROPER YARN as in more than just the basic#acrylic and cheap-ass wool that Spotlight overcharges for i drove down there today and i spent way too much money but now#i have enough Indiecita alpaca yarn to knit the forest sweater pattern i bought the other day 😭😭😭😭😭) also have i mentioned#how obsessed i am with kninjaknitter's podfics? because holy shit i honestly don't know how i lived without them#who was i before i had her fucking 9.5hr Synchronicity podfic saved to my phone? because i do not remember that person#will both of my 11hr flights be wall to wall podfic and knitting? yes. yes they will#but kate! - you say - don't you literally have 50+ books to read before next semester? don't you start your thesis in a few weeks?#yes. and yes. and shut up i'm going on holidays 🙉
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My bitchass cat- 80 ft up in a goddamn tree
It has been a day
#i dont want to make a long post so im ranting in the tags#this is now day 2 of her being up there#we only just found where she was in the tree thanks to binoculars#there are lots of emotions rn#ive already had a shitty few days and now this#on top of all that#this guy that came to “help” was constantly making remarks about ways to get her down that would definitely kill her#“oh I'm just not a cat person”#ok???#and???#shut the fuck up#i lost my cool on his ass so fucking fast#i like to consider myself a generally nice person when it comes to social interactions#but within the hour i was done with this asshole#i will not mention the ways he talked about getting her down#but i will mention that i definitely threatened him#lucky i did not tell him what i was really thinking#which was that i wanted to cave his skull in#but still#i dont give a fuck that you are here to help#the past few days have been shit and now this????#why are you such an ass???#fuck that guy#thanks for reading my rant#i hope your week was good#ill update on how getting her down goes#rant post#personal rant#rant
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I think a lot of christians trying to get me back in fail to realize a) my ex also pulled the whole "I'd kill myself for you" schtick so I'm not falling for it twice and b) the idea of living forever sounds fucking lame
#suicide tw#I made this joke in therapy a few weeks ago#My therapist loves my jokes but also knows I use the Bit for evil#including subconscious attempts to shut down his therapizing of me#oopsies#but my uni has been getting more christians on campus preaching unfortunately#since it's orientation season#and Im so tired of 'Well Jesus loves you and wants you to join him in heaven' like no thanks Id rather be nothing#I rather my consciousness just snuff out like a cheap candle's flame#I hate the idea of living forever whether in heaven hell or purgatory#I think we lose consciousness and sorta just become electrons and atoms and go into building another being/object#matter is not created nor destroyed so from matter we come and to matter we go#and we just have a silly lil time in between mattering as living matter#that's my ideal after'life'#ex christian#religious trauma
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ohhhh my god. okay. so. my aunt does like, she buys random junk in bulk from retail wholesalers and then resells it on like, facebook marketplace and ebay and stuff. whatever. so my mom works for her. makes a flat $50 a day, regardless of the fact that shes disabled and doing hard labor for at least 8 hours a day, often 10+. and min wage here is $10 an hour but mom argued that $50 a day is still more than what she would make working the same hours at an actual job because of taxes...like girl that would be 50% taxes. you do not pay that fucking much. so thats already Bad.
but today mom shows me a video of a knife theyre gonna sell, and i watch 2 seconds and i realize its an automatic knife, and i tell her hey. thats illegal to possess in this state. let alone sell! and mom is like ohhh [aunt] knows what shes doing itll be fine.... we sell knives on there all the time she just doesnt put pictures and calls them something else on the listing to get around fb/ebays policies :)
LIKE. HELLO. THATS NOT BETTER. YOURE COMMITTING MULTIPLE CRIMES. *AS YOUR JOB.* and she was just like "its not a big deal she knows what shes doing." folks, this is the same aunt that, very illegally, paid me to sort through her clients confidential tax documents and bank records and stuff. because she works for a bank. and took the records home to sort them. i dont think she DOES know what shes doing, actually!
#why do both of my parents need to be so impressively incompetent. i like. cannot find the words for how . i feel about this#like. idc about crimes. go forth. be free. but maybe. just maybe. you should not make your job#“hi today i will post about how i am selling illegally possessed objects on a widely used public forum”#dont do crimes STUPID. yanno.#in other parent news. its now like. month 6 or so of dad refusing to get his insurance reinstated.#hes been on the same step (taking his paystubs to the dhhr office) for like 3 months?#anyway apparently he found out today/last night that when he was a kid he was diagnosed with gastroparesis !#which is like ! cool! you have a diagnosis AND ive been living with that for 16 years and can help you 🥰#but we were sitting there with mom (this was right before the knife thing) and she was like “well you gotta get your insurance now so you#can get on the right meds“ and dad was like yeah ill go....#and mom was saying well go in the morning when they open etc etc and he was like i will#and i pointed out that just two weeks ago i told him that too. and he didnt want to. bc hed lose money due to not being able to work#and mom was like well he doesnt work at 8am. and i was like yeah i know but i told him to go at 8am two weeks ago and that was his response#and then he proceeded to claim that this whole time he didnt know they opened at 8am.#folks. he doesnt start working until like...usually 10 or so. WHAT GOVERNMENT OFFICE DOESNT OPEN UNTIL 10.#PLUS. WE LIVE IN A RURAL HOUR. *BUSY* TAKES LIKE AN HOUR. MOST OF THE TIME YOURE IN AND OUT WITHIN 20 MINITES.#ive been fucking considering PAYING HIM to go get it.#and then he claims he didnt know it opened at 8am. when i have told him that. MULTIPLE TIMES.#WHY DO THEY HAVE TO BE LIKE THISSSS THEYRE THE MOST IMMATURE ADULTS IVE EVER MET AND THATS IMPRESSIVE!!!#IVE KNOWN PEOPLE WHO PAY THEIR RENT IN COKE OR WHO ARE ESSENTIALLY PROFESSIONAL PARTIERS. AND *THEYRE* MORE RESPONSIBLE AND MATURE THAN MY#PARENTS. SO WHAT GIVES.#also theyre 50 like cmon yall. youre not even 20 or 30. i think you should know how to not like. get your job shut down or die of lack#of medication.#did i tell yall one of the times a few months ago i was nagging dad abt getting his insurance#his response was literally. no exxageration.#he was like oughhh i dont wanna see doctors because then theyll find out somethings wrong with me#and ill have to go on a bunch of medication.#and then he actually for real. said.#“being on too many medications killed my grandma”#even mom was like cmon man. thats not even true. they misdiagnosed her and put her on WRONG meds. she wasnt even on that many.
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I keep forgetting I can't seem to get the current version of xkit to work on my new laptop and going to do stuff that it let me do fjldksafjdlsaj
#text post#im p sure the mutual marker thing was a feature w/them bc i'm missing them on everyone that#as far as I know I was still a mutual with#then again I did drop like. fifteen followers over the last week#but that usually happens whenever I start actually posting my personal thoughts on my personal blog lmao#have also gotten a few messages both politely and not so politely asking me to essentially shut the fuck up re: my personal posts#idk what to tell y'all on that bc like. i have a lot of folks I follow n' enjoy who post just as much /even more than me re: personal stuff#I think im just particularly irritating even when I'm trying really hard not to be and try to edit my posts down/keep them under readmores#but im trying to be better#not trying hard enough tho apparently and this tag essay probably won't help but. idk.#i think we're all allowed to be as irritating/post as much personal stuff as we want on our blogs#but i also think im still operating uselessly on how tumblr was a few years ago. ppl don't like that anymore it seems#and that's okay but I gotta work on catching up to that and do better#anyway. it's possible i did lose most of my mutuals and tbh it's not a big deal it's just a lot of ppl at once like. damn.#makes me wonder what the last straw was just out of curiosity#bc if that's really what happened then im down to like. maybe three or four mutuals left and it hasn't been that low since I first started#on here back in like. tail end of hs beginning of college#I also keep missing the quick reblog feature which was my fave but. someday I will figure out why xkit isn't working for me#and i will fix it. at a time when im not sick and feeling cruddy lol
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Who would have guessed that when your job is in danger, you will feel like crap sooner or later ;u;
#man it’s been a while since I last felt so down -.-#I stayed positive for a while but now that my working hours had to be cut I suddenly have way too much time on my hands#feels horrible to lose the place I finally found peace and a kind of family in#it might all go well but for the next few weeks or months nothing will be safe#I’m just glad I have learned enough self-compassion over the years to not use exercise or food restriction as coping mechanisms anymore#like i try to allow all emotions and just let them happen yknow#still feels nice to let stuff out in text form#im gonna shut up now..#shitposting
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alex saying jacques has always been in his corner since day one… sometimes dts is real :’)
jacques in that one dts scene…sexiest thing ever in the history of humanity
#also i love that jacques has become his manager#and his new press officer dom is just as protective of him#like Literally shut down an interview a few weeks ago for them asking questions he hadn’t agreed to#he has a ride or die community only!!#asks#anon
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So.
#so remember that school that I didn't go to bc in the end it would just be way too expensive to take on and I kinda spiraled and lost#all sense of self and I've kinda been drifting for the last year trying to figure out what to do with my life#well apparently my parents have been talking with the school behind my back and for the last few months they have been working out#payment deals and financial aid and today they got a call back with an offer that they like feel happy with and idk what to do#I wanted to go so so badly this time last year that it was literally soul crushing that I couldn't go#but I've also spent the last year convincing myself that this was actually a good thing and I've been looking into new schools#and I don't fucking know someone tell me what to do bc I have no idea what I'm feeling I'm kinda shutting down and I have to make#a decision by the first#sstfu.txt#how am I supposed to make such a huge life altering choice in two weeks I'm gonna throw up#my best friend is states away and my other best friend is in the city I just want someone here to hug me and tell me what to do
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it sucks when a youtuber who streams most of the time and then uploads cut down versions of their streams is like 'you couldve seen this whole thing had you actually been there btw. you should watch my streams actually' cause its like. not everyone can or wants to sit through live streams, especially ones that are either really long or theres so many people in the chat that youre basically just watching a video that you cant pause or skip forward or backwards on
like just upload the full vods and if people want to go to the streams they will, your advertising should just be you, you shouldnt need to be like 'you should feel bad or like you missed out because for any reason you missed the stream lol' like ? skill issue
cause the whole reason ive even checked out pretty much any live streamer was because i saw one of their vods and was like 'that seems fun, i would like to see more of these, and try to be there live if i can!' and like its not a 'im gonna miss out on everything if i dont see them live :[' thing yknow
ive mostly been referring to one youtuber this whole time that i used to watch cause i liked their videos but i unsubscribed mainly for this specific reason (because without fail theyd say this stuff in every video and it was beyond irritating) but i just know other people do it
also i know this probably comes out of left field but it also goes hand in hand with the 'only 20% of my viewers are subscribed!' thing (which that youtuber also did) and its like. bitch if i wanted to subscribe i would subscribe. they say 'you can always undo it later!' yeah or i could just not do it at all. shut up. that shit makes me want to subscribe even less. is it meant to be guilt trippy or something? 'look at the people who arent subscribing to me, it makes me sad :( please make my arbitrary number go up pleeassseee :(((('
im not gonna say this stuff feels manipulative because like, this is ultimately pretty unserious and is just annoying at most, but it rubs me the wrong way. like either youre good enough for people to want to see your streams or subscribe to you and you shouldnt need to worry about people not doing those things, or youre insecure despite already having THOUSANDS of people watching you and subscribing to you and your little arbitrary number not going up at breakneck pace is bothering you for some reason
i guess i cant say that people only do this for fun anymore since this, like everything, "has" to be monetized now, and i admit i dont know (or give a fuck) how that all works, but like. come on. just let the results speak for themselves and stop grating on the nerves of anyone watching because you cant just let your videos and streams be enough on their own
#me when i rant about something out of nowhere that none of my followers care about probably ajfjahd#LIKE. a few weeks ago i started following a small twitch streamer because he posted vods on youtube that i genuinely rly liked#and i joined his discord and i try to catch every stream of his that sounds interesting to me#but he doesnt make it into a whole 'pleaseeeee watch my streams aough you guys missed it :[' thing like.#he just plays games and has fun and posts them and he got a lot of new viewers from it. including me#obviously i fixated on hlvrai cause the streams were posted on youtube. both the cut down AND full streams#(i personally prefer the full stream versions)#i tried watching the rtvs crew for a while but like i said. streams with tons of people arent fun for me tbh#but i did watch a few of them for a little while anyway#my post#twitch#streaming#youtube#this is gonna be the funniest fucking reason for me pulling this quote out but. if you build it they will come yknow#the youtuber i was referring to as doing this stuff is kwite btw ill admit that now#I GENUINELY ENJOYED HIS VIDEOS BUT I JUST COULDNT DO IT ANYMORE LIKE SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT MISSING THINGS AND SUBSCRIBING#i barely like livestreams !!! like genuinely!!! id rather just watch vods or normal videos!!!#i dont wanna have to drop everything to watch a stream and feel like i cant do anything else because god forbid i miss something#and genuinely all i can even do is watch it because any comments made in chat get swept up in the ocean of others anyway
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theres exavtly one chair free and its the one next to pedophile mark. no fucking chance. im spending my whole hour in the bathroom i guess.
#tongue#i had to snap at him bc he was STARING down my 16 year old coworker#like a few weeks after some creeps were literally following her around the store while she was doing reshops#cannot fucking stand people like that#ill shut up now tho#and illnprobably delete this shit evenruslly
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