#like it just feels…..so blatantly obvious and ugh

[didyousaykfc]

that moment where you switch from another language to english and speech immediately becomes awkward and heavy

[alcoholfreenayeon]

can you do co worker Irene x fem reader,where Irene secretly has a crush on reader and she waits every time for her.But this day readers ex didnt stop calling reader and ended up waiting for her at work so Irene went to reader and acted like her gf.Later Irene took reader to her home and they made out ,THENN READERS EX CALLED AGAIN.irene told her to answer the call and while they were talking reader couldn't stop moaning (English isn't my first language sorry)

A/N: Well….as I wrote this, I realized it was not so much smut but more fluff that’s a bit suggestive so this will be a bit disappointing for all of you who voted for this expecting smut😭(but also horny jail for you all🚔) anyways, this is probably the last request I’m doing before I finish the Angst April fics unless I get a random burst of creativity.

Stupid Cupid

Irene x fem!reader

CW: Fluff, suggestive

Your phone started ringing, once again, right on time, your ex calling you exactly 5 minutes after your lunch break starts so you have no excuse to not pick up other than that you don’t want to talk.

You sigh and pick up, knowing the calls will continue to come if you don’t pick up. “Hello….”

As you talk with your ex, telling her the same thing you have been for the past month, you are seemingly unaware of an annoyed stare in your direction, albeit from afar. Irene watches you, an exasperated look on her face. ‘The audacity of that stupid woman to keep calling her y/n’, she thought to herself. ‘Well…not her y/n….yet’. She really wanted to walk over, snatch the phone out of your hand, tell your ex to fuck off, block her and then kiss you. But alas, she couldn’t do that. And that annoyed her even more. Regardless, she was about to get on with her work when her ears perked up at something you said.

“What! What do you mean you are on your way here? I don’t want to see you. I already sa-. No, we don’t need to give it another tr-…..fine, whatever”, you sigh and put down your phone, rolling your eyes in irritation, unsure of what will happen next when you feel a gentle tap on your shoulder. You turn and find that it’s Irene, your coworker. Supposedly she’s the scary one but she’s been nothing but sweet to you so you have always chalked it down to her just being more prompt and serious than the rest.

“I, ahem, I did the….”, Irene begins but trails off when you take the sheets of paper from her, your hands lingering on hers for a second. You smile at her and you could have sworn she blushed. “……I couldn’t help it but I overheard you on the phone…”, she says hesitantly.

“Ugh..yea..my ex…it’s just a mess”, you start, “and yeah I know I can just block or her not answer or whatever but like…I think she won’t let up as long as she thinks she can win me back…”

Irene listened to you, a concerned look on her face, a slight frown forming on her face before her expression softened again. “Y/n….maybe…”, she hesitates, you see her cheeks flushing, “you should tell her you are seeing someone else…or something”, she quickly added at the end.

You sigh, “I wish it was that easy, she’ll keep on pressing me even then, who is it, how do they look, why them etc etc. Thanks for the suggestion though”.

Irene stayed quiet, a bit stumped. That’s when you hear a shout, “Y/N there you are!”. And you see your ex walk up and you sigh. This was not going to be pretty….

She walks right up to you and you can’t deny it, she does look really pretty, “Y/n…”, she smiles, “look I’m sorry for being so pushy lately…but I really think we are making a mistake. Like it’s been a little while now and it’s been difficult for me and you said it’s been hard for you too so why don’t we just make out-up, oops”, she giggled.

Irene couldn’t believe what she was hearing, no way Y/N would fall for this trap right? Like it was so blatantly obvious.

You stayed silent…yes she was not completely wrong, you had been feeling a bit lonely lately and you did miss intimacy but you had been focusing on your job lately and that made it much easier, like for some reason you didn’t feel like working was such a burden anymore. But did you really want to start over once again?

As you considered your options, your ex took a step closer, smiling, her hands reaching for your cheek.

That’s when Irene suddenly stood up, a determined expression on her face as she got in between you two. “Stop. And leave. She doesn’t want you. How many times does she have to tell you before you understand huh?”, she says calmly but also coldly.

Your ex seems taken aback for a moment before she chuckles, “Who even are yo-”

“I’m her girlfriend.”, Irene says defiantly.

Now your ex looks stunned. She gives Irene a once over, a frown forming on her face and she faces you back again, “Y/N? What is she….”

You look at Irene and then your ex and make up your mind, “Yea, it’s true….”.

“You both are lying, there’s no way, I don’t believe-”, she begins again but is cut off.

“Believe what you want but that’s the truth. And none of your business anymore anyway so just go away”, Irene snaps.

Dumbstruck, your ex just stares at Irene who grabs your hand takes you back to your desk, as soon she’s out of sight, you notice Irene is completely red faced and she lets go of your hand slowly, reluctantly…and then glances at you, unsure of what of say when you hug her, “Thanks for that, you shouldn’t have…now she’ll be after you too…”

“I don’t think I should worry about that too much”, Irene replies, seemingly unbothered.

“No…I mean like…I’m pretty sure she’s gonna be at the parking lot when you leave, watching us to see whether we were lying or not…”, you sigh.

“Oh”, Irene says quietly as she realizes what you mean, “I…I guess maybe we just…just pretend abitlongerthenright?”

“Huh…oh..oh!”, you are a bit surprised Irene is still willing to continue with this facade, “S-sure…I guess that works…maybe it’ll put her off for good? But…what do we do?”

“……maybe….you come with me…you know instead of taking the bus…just pretend I’m dropping you home or something?”, Irene says quietly.

You consider it for moment before nodding in agreement and that was the plan.

Hours later as you get in the passenger seat of Irene’s car, you notice through the side mirror that a familiar car was in the distance, observing. You sigh and point it out to Irene who says nothing and begins to drive in silence.

A couple minutes in, you notice that your ex is still following and you once again tell Irene who suggests maybe you both go to her house for a bit so the ex doesn’t bother you and has no choice but to believe you both are dating.

20 minutes later, you are sitting awkwardly in Irene’s living room while she gets some snacks. You both eat a few biscuits and then Irene suddenly becomes really quiet, she looks at you and takes a deep breath, “Y/N…..I have something to tell you…”

You look at her, perplexed and tilt your head, “what is it?”, however as you say it, you suddenly become very conscious of her hand on top of yours, the way she is looking at you right now, how you yourself look at the moment and why suddenly it feels like there’s so much tension between you both.

She hesitates…and hesitates again and then looks away, moving her hand and shifting away looking frustrated, “Nevermind…it’s nothing…my bad”.

“Huh”, you feel surprised and a bit hurt that it seems like Irene isn’t completely comfortable around you, “Come on, just say it, you’ve already said you are my girlfriend”, you say smiling and nudge her, “What could be-”, you falter when you see Irene look back up at you, nervously biting her lip and then suddenly putting both her arms on your shoulders, pushing you back a little and she starts to lean in, as if you kiss you.

Not knowing what to do you just shut your eyes and a moment later you felt her lips on yours. She kissed you and kissed you again and this time you kissed her back and before you even realized you both had begun to make out. A minute later Irene finally pulled back, both of you red faced and breathless, panting, looking at the other.

Irene clenched her fists and suddenly blurted out, “I meant it when I said I want to be your girlfriend”.

You slowly blinked, “what…..”

She sighs in frustration, looking away, blushing, “don’t make me say it again…..”

Unbelievable, was Irene really saying she liked you? What! Did she always like you? Is that why it always seemed she was nicer to you? Did you like her too? You didn’t think so but…at the same time why did it feel so good when she kissed you, why did your heart pound when she said she was your girlfriend….why couldn’t you take your eyes off her when she drove you here…..did….did you like her too? Maybe…enough atleast to be willing to give it a shot with her.

You look at her and she doesn’t meet your eyes but you feel her tense up, waiting for your reply and then this time, you kiss her. Irene gasps but then leans into it, melting into your arms. She then caresses your cheek and begins to take off her jacket, “Y/N…..I want you”

Even though that makes you want you bury your face and squeal, you manage to stay somewhat calm, smirking at her, “what are you waiting for then?”, you say moving back and leaning against the sofa.

As Irene gets on top of you, her eyes full of desire, suddenly your phone starts ringing loudly completely ruining the mood…you both sigh and you pick up….

“Hello….oh it’s you…what now, honestly you are just being really annoying now”, you say, annoyed now that your ex is still calling you. “No, I don-ah!”, you cover your mouth as you almost moaned because Irene just began to kiss your neck. You try to give her a look to stop but shakes her head, “keep talking”, she says smugly while continuing to kiss your neck while her hands begin to undress you.

A few minutes later, you were shivering, almost completely naked, your neck and shoulders full of hickeys and your ex almost crying on the phone as she cuts the call, realizing what was happening.

You take a deep breath and toss your phone away, ready to jump at Irene but she beats you to it, getting on top of you, her hand clamping your mouth shut, “you were so bad right now, couldn’t even be quiet while on the phone…that can’t happen, so I’m going to test you now”, she whispered as her hands began to sink lower and lower, “if you stay quiet….I’ll let you off or else you are going to be edged again and again until I get what I want from you ok?”…….

[twilight-saga-headcanons]

Hello, I would like to know if you could write preferences about the pack feeling in need of attention and affection

Sam - Sam will stare. He would rather die than say anything out loud, but you'll know he wants attention when he won't stop looking at you. His eyes will flick away when you turn toward him, but as soon as you turn your back, he'll be staring longingly at you again. He doesn't want to make you feel weird or awkward, but he just likes looking at you and hopes you want to spend time with him too.

Jared - SUCH AN ANNOYING LITTLE BABY!!! There's no hiding when he wants attention. It doesn't matter what you're doing, who you're talking to, where you are, etc. If he wants attention, he's going to get it but tossing you over his shoulder and dragging you away.

Paul - Stubborn, stubborn boy. Will deny adamantly that he needs attention, which is basically your signal that he needs a hug and a forehead kiss or something. Yeah, yeah, you get it, he's a big brave man who can do anything, but he also needs some affection now and then.

Embry - You know he wants attention when he starts distracting you while you're working. It will be little things at first, like asking you where he placed his phone or the remote, but then he'll kind of hover over you while you sit at the computer or just lean against your chair and play with your hair. You won't be able to get anything done, so you'll just have to push your chair away from your desk and spend some time with him until he's content.

Jacob - In public, it's just running his fingers over your arm or playfully tugging a piece of your hair. If you're alone, he'll make it blatantly obvious that he wants affection.

Quil - If he wants attention, you'll know. He'll make it very clear by just outright saying, "I need attention right now or I am going to die." He's so dramatic about it, but he's a guy who needs to know where he stands with you at all times, so it kind of makes sense.

Leah - Leah won't say anything outright, but she's the type to sigh loudly until you take the initiative. The sighs will get louder and louder until you finally turn to her and say, "you want to go get something to eat and watch a movie together or something?" and she'll be like, "ugh, I was busy but yeah, I guess." But secretly that was her plan all along.

Seth - He will get so!!! cuddly!!! You'll be sitting on the sofa and before you even realize it, he'll have snuck up next to you and put your head in his lap. Run your fingers through his short hair and you'll have him eating out of the palm of your hand basically.

[mountainficss]

omg hihihiii, this is like my 1st time EVERRR writing a req, but I feel ur fics r just too good ngl, I read this concept in another fic, it was like thigh riding meanish joshua, and it just made me so AHDJSLKRIEKE like and I wanna see how you would see it !!! also if u do anons or wtv ??? idk how it fully works, but can I be 🦈 anon ??? I think thats how it works ??? SORRY THIS IS SO LONG THANK UUU

!! mentions of: mean!joshua, thigh riding, teasing

omg hihihiii anon thank you very much for sending me a request! i’m always happy to answer any submissions <3 they’re never too long for me bby! also yes you can definitely be 🦈 anon!!

AND AKEKEKEKE I LOVE MEANIE JOSHIE <333 it’s so funny you asked bc i am currently in the process of writing another joshua imagine! i’m in my joshua feels today <3

as you know joshua is a sweet guy. he’s such a gentleman! he’d totally be the type wrap his jacket around your shoulders when you’re cold and pay for your meals. but ohhh he can be mean! a real bully. i feel like if you act out intentionally, like tease him in public or just disobey him, he’ll hide his irritation for the time being. maybe laugh it off or just keep quiet for a while. but when you get back to his apartment and try to tug his shirt off, he’ll grab your wrists roughly to stop you. he’d slowly back into the living room, guiding you with him by your wrists. he’d plop down on the couch, pulling you in to straddle his thigh and gripping your hips harshly to keep you in place. you’d lean closer to press kisses to his jawline, but he wouldn’t let you and would just grip your hips harder ;( “this is all you’re getting tonight,” he’d bounce his thigh underneath you once, making it blatantly obvious that this is your punishment for misbehaving. he’d smirk at your whines and protests, and relish in the fact that even through your complaints you’re still mindlessly grinding against his thigh. he knows that you’d take anything he offered if it meant you could cum. you’d continue weakly fucking yourself on his thigh, pathetic whines escaping your lips as he smiles meanly at you. you’d beg him to strip you, beg him to fuck you, but he’d just scoff at your pleading. he’d probably tease you too :( “aww, baby wants me?” he’d coo with faux sympathy, guiding your hips. he’d jut his bottom lip out, giving you a fake pout. “aww. bet you wish i was inside, huh? poor baby~” you’d just mewl and pout as he guides your hips faster, feeling your climax approaching through the friction of his jeans rubbing against your clothed heat. “‘shua,” you’d pant and fist at his shirt, sinking your nails into the fabric and wrinkling it. you could feel your panties sticking to your core as he whispers, “if you can cum like this, i’ll think about fucking you tonight.” you’d let out little whimpers and cries, your orgasm threatening to tear through you. “y-you’re so m-mean, joshie,” you’d huff, his taunting laugh bringing a tinge of pink to your cheeks. “make a mess,” he’d coax, pressing a heated kiss to your lips. the contact alone would tip you over the edge, finishing with a loud moan as you shove your tongue into his mouth. he’d grind you against his thigh, helping you ride out your orgasm as you moan erotically into his mouth. you’d feel him smile against your lips. “you’ve been a brat all night, do you think i should fuck you?” and then you’d spend the whole night just whining and riling him up, trying your hardest to convince him to fuck you ;(( i don’t think he’d need much convincing though :((( UGH I LOVE JOSHUA <333

[ultimateempath]

Rating AAI2 localization names, part 1!

part 2 HERE

Sebastian Debeste --> Eustace Winner

2/10, I hate it. I hate it so much. They named him 'Useless Whiner'. Why are they so damn mean to him??? Only isn't a 0/10 because admittedly he does look & act like a Eustace.

Justine Courtney --> Verity Gavélle

9/10, very pretty! Not as blatantly obvious as the fan-translation name, but still kinda on the nose with the whole gavel thing. Fits her well!

Ray Shields --> Eddie Fender

8/10. Very on the nose, but not in a bad way! I can accept it, it fits him.

Di-Jung Huang --> Di-Jung Wang

10/10! It's pretty much the same which is a plus, and I've gotta give them props for keeping the subtle 'the wrong one' wordplay! I'm completely happy with this.

Ethan Rooke --> Bastian Rook

7/10, not bad. A lot more on the nose, but it sounds kinda cool so it gets a pass from me.

Horace Knightly --> Bronco Knight

5/10. I...I've gotta give them props for still managing a horse joke, but oh my god. Fucking Bronco, really?? It matches his personality, but just...ugh.

Nicole Swift --> Tabby Lloyd

...y'know what, 7.5/10. It's violently on the nose, but I think it's funny so it gets a pass.

EDIT

Simon Keyes --> Simeon Saint

eh....solid 8/10. It doesn't roll off the tongue as well, but I get what they were going for and it does fit him. I'm just autistic and don't like it when a word doesn't sound/feel right, I'm not gonna dock points for that.

[tadpolesonalgae]

i know you've probably gotten a dozen of these cbmthy asks with petty sentiments but GOD do i want to see a scene of azriel just getting gagged by seeing reader be at ease and comfortable with bas or eris. two people he clearly doesn't approve of and have spent significantly less time with reader than he has, yet seem to make reader feel comfortable enough to bicker around and laugh with. i know in recent chapters az & reader seem to slowly become more friends(?) i guess??? but the whole dynamic is still very stilted and jagged and ajdhsjajsjs. part of me just wants azriel to hurry up and fall in love with reader just to have reader give up on him so that we can see him grovel. but also part of me just wants to let this mess simmer and enjoy the angst 🤩

i get azriel's thing of him not owing anyone his affections, bc i also relate to the uncomfortable feeling of someone close to you/in your social circle crushing over you so blatantly when you don't reciprocate those feelings. but also...... he was very unnecessarily dismissive and asshole-like to her the whole time during cbmthy 😭

im still hanging on for the azriel x reader endgame and but i hope we still get to see more of eris 🫣 like we get to see their platonic bond deepen? even if it's probably ooc for the eris you portrayed in cbmthy but secretly i wish we get to see him have a soft side for reader that no one expects 😔😔 and that confusing literally everyone in the inner circle lmao. like eris comes to the night court for something and he's still wearing the fox ring...

‘but GOD do i want to see a scene of azriel just getting gagged by seeing reader be at ease and comfortable with bas or eris.’

🤭 wouldn’t that be a fun scene 🤭

‘part of me just wants azriel to hurry up and fall in love with reader just to have reader give up on him so that we can see him grovel.’

I’m both anxious and excited to write that specific scene? It’s still very far off since I think it will most likely happen towards the end of cbmthy? I think? But the scene I have in mind, I think the chapter if happens in will probably be one that will take me a while to write since I’ll want to get the emotion right and make sure everything’s said that should be said? If that makes sense?

But I agree, I’m on your side with that ☹️ why can’t he just fall in love with reader now and then they can spend these six months together happily 😭 they could like get a cabin over solecist, or like, get each other cute presents for Starfall? Like Az picks out a necklace or bracelet for her and she gets him some cuff links or a pretty tie and they end up accidentally kind of matching? That would be so cute!! 😭😭😭 ugh, if only things were better between them, they could at least do it platonically, but no 😞

‘ but also part of me just wants to let this mess simmer and enjoy the angst 🤩’

Oh don’t worry about mess! I think things are about to get thrown about a little now that reader’s in on the court affairs, because obviously she’s going to want to help by reading through all those books that everyone else would find boring and tedious ☹️🧡💛

‘but also...... he was very unnecessarily dismissive and asshole-like to her the whole time during cbmthy 😭’

Right? Reader didn’t even try to come into him or flirt with him 😭 like I get she’s a bit flustered around him which makes it kind of obvious but it’s not like she’s trying to constantly get him to spend time with her, or giving him gifts, or intentionally making her feelings known since she’s so ashamed of them 😭 Az give her a break man ☹️

‘like we get to see their platonic bond deepen? even if it's probably ooc for the eris you portrayed in cbmthy but secretly i wish we get to see him have a soft side for reader that no one expects 😔😔’

I don’t know about him showing platonic feelings to her openly, since i do think that would be a little ooc for how I’ve written him so far but who knows? Maybe he’ll change once he knows that reader knows about the Prison too? Or maybe he will show platonic feelings but in his own, Eris way 🤭

‘like eris comes to the night court for something and he's still wearing the fox ring...’

The fox ring hasn’t been forgotten 🫣 neither has the ring Eris gave to her, which I imagine reader will be keeping close in order to give herself some comfort so her magic doesn’t do something it’s not supposed to 😭

[thegirlwithataser]

Garvez and How They Treat One Another

So the thing that struck me most about Luke and Penelope's interactions in this episode, specifically the scene in the briefing room where they talk about Penelope seeing Tyler, is the way that Luke treats Penelope versus the way that she treats him.

Luke was clearly about to yell at her, but she looked so small and scared that he literally swallowed his words. He told her that she was in the wrong, but he was incredibly gentle about it. He had every right to get extremely mad at her, but he didn’t play it that way, because he cares about her and her feelings so much.

But on the opposite end of the spectrum, Penelope has no regard for his feelings at all. He tells her that it’s too much for him to be hearing her talk about her sex life and she says “i know” but then just… keeps doing it. The whole scene, basically all she talks about is how good the sex is (which is a super weird thing to be focusing on in the moment anyway but that's a point for another time). Luke is very careful with his words, even though he's mad, but she just keeps talking even once he asks her to stop.

An in depth look at Luke and Penelope's treatment of one another throughout the show, as well as an analysis of Luke specifically on the date, below the cut.

And the thing is, is that this is such a pattern for Luke. When we first met him, one of his very first interactions with the other characters was with Garcia in the elevator. She’s uncomfortable and extremely short with him. She snaps and rolls her eyes, and he lets her.

This is literally acknowledged in the show. After she meets Roxy, she admits to thinking he was big headed and macho, and he said “I know.” And she’s shocked and confused, and he says. “I know you didn’t want to like me at first.��

Luke clocked her extreme hatred of change immediately. He recognized that his joining of the team immediately after her best friend left was a big change for her, and even without knowing her well at all, figured out that she needed space and time to deal with it. So he let her. He even made it easier on her by playing into it at certain points. He let her tease him and occasionally be genuinely mean, because he knew that this was her way of dealing with the change.

Luke is incredibly perceptive and also ridiculously kind. It's who he is with everyone, but it is most blatantly obvious with Penelope. Again, he barely knew her, and this was a huge change for him too. But he figured her out immediately and then made a conscious decision to let her do what she needed to do.

He does this repeatedly throughout the entire time that they have known one another. Even after they get to know each other and her teasing loses it’s genuine edge, he still lets her take out her stress on him. In the episode “Saturday”, Garcia is incredibly stressed out, and she snaps at him for saying something that made complete sense (“Shut up shut up! Just because you look like that doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want with this part of your face”) and he just laughs it off. At the end of the episode, when she thanks him for going out of his way to help, she purposely makes it seem like it had nothing to do with her, because acknowledging that Luke cares enough about her to do that would be too much in that moment. Again, Luke lets her. It’s very clear that he knows what she’s doing, but he doesn’t correct her.

Even when other people point it out, he plays it off. When JJ asks “What did you do to her?” he laughs and brushes it off.

We know that Luke doesn’t love when Penelope is mean to him because in the episode where he’s not allowed out in the field, Emily tells him that he has to work the case with Garcia, and he grins. He’s clearly happy with that, but then Penelope finds out, and reacts by saying “Ugh, fine” and making a face at him, and his smile immediately drops. He gives Emily a sarcastic “thanks” and makes a face of his own. So we know he doesn’t love it when her teasing trips into meaner territory, but he always, always, just lets her do it.

Luke is also the first person to bring up the toll that the job takes on her. He’s the one that goes to her office in the episode with the snuff films, already planning on watching it himself to get what they need. And when Garcia says that he doesn’t need to, that she already did it, he’s immediately concerned. He points out that she doesn’t even look at crime scene photos, something that everyone knew, but had never brought up before.

Everyone else loves Penelope, and they’re aware that she’s more sensitive to the gore of their job than they are, but they never say anything about it. Luke is the first to bring it up, and he asks her if she’s okay. When she brushes it off, and makes it clear that she doesn’t want to talk about it, it is extremely obvious that he’s concerned about that response, but he bites his tongue and once again, he lets her.

Specifically with that moment, we know he’s concerned. It would make him feel better to talk to her about it and actually make things better, but to Luke it doesn’t matter that talking to her about it and helping her feel better would ease his concern. That’s not what she wants in the moment, so he lets her get away with it.

Luke is constantly tracking how Garcia is feeling and reacting accordingly. For example, he brings her a little cat figurine when she's been upset because he knows that it will cheer her up.

At the start of the season, he feels guilty going to Penelope for help when he knows how good it’s been for her to not be involved, but they quite literally had no choice. He apologizes repeatedly for having to ask, he distracts her from the stress by telling her that she’s been totally irreplaceable at the BAU, he apologizes to her for Rossi’s behavior, and he is explicit in his gratitude for her help and tells her that she’s the best, because she needs to hear it.

He encourages her to tell Emily her idea about Green, he’s incredibly supportive of her and pushes when she needs it. He is completely just her cheerleader in that scene, and he keeps an incredibly close eye on her the whole time they’re working together in that episode.

When she’s on a conference call with the team, he’s the one that comments on the noise in the background and expresses his concern for her. He’s the one that asks about it because he wants to know what’s going on with her and make sure that she’s okay.

Even with the date, Luke is the one going out of his way to make conversation. It’s clearly awkward, but he was trying so hard. He started every little mini conversation, and he didn’t say anything about it not going well, not until she did. Even his agreement with her when she says that it feels clunky feels like they're having two different conversations. He's clearly relieved that that they're in agreement that it's awkward, but the next thing that he says is "but why? I mean, it's not like this when we're at work." Not that he doesn't have feelings for her, not that dating is a bad idea, he's wondering why they're so awkward on this date. He is saying that they're able to hangout and have fun with each other usually, so why is it different now? But Penelope goes a completely different route.

She says "I find it very hard to have a conversation with you when I am not dunking on you." (which is a mean thing to say considering they've had plenty of serious conversations) Luke's face completely changes. The warmth he'd had from a moment ago fades and he's literally speechless for a moment and then the only response he has is a half-hearted "That is cold." which should have been a joke, but he doesn't laugh. And then as Penelope is saying "With us, there absolutely is something there, but not that" he is shaking his head and he's no longer smiling. If he were shaking his head to agree with her, there would still be some remnants of relief on his face, but he just looks sad. After she says that she knows his person is out there, he looks down at the table, shakes his head, and when he looks back up, he looks completely dejected and asks "Where?" almost helplessly. His voice and the way he looks are both completely lost. Even his small laugh lands as pain instead of humor.

He doesn't add anything at all to that whole part of the conversation. He doesn't agree with her, he doesn't share his own feelings, he just lets her do all the talking. When she says “now that I know you’re not trying to get me drunk” he doesn’t become defensive and insist that that’s not what was happening and he would never do that, even though we all know that Luke Alvez is not that guy and he would have been well within his rights to take offense to that comment. He lets her say it, because she needs to say something to get herself back on solid ground, and he knows this about her, so he lets her get away with it. Again. He kind of huffs out a weak laugh, and then, in a voice that is completely different to how he was speaking to her before all of that, this one much softer and subdued, he says "Well okay, whatever it takes." He's smiling, but it doesn't reach his eyes even a little, but Garcia is grinning and she giggles.

The moment where she says that she can't talk to him without making fun of him also makes his reaction in episode 8 to her not teasing him when there was a perfect opportunity especially notable. He knows because of her own admission that she is at her most comfortable around him when she’s making fun of him, and so he is immediately caught off guard when she is nice and doesn’t take the opportunity to dunk on him.

Luke is always paying attention to Penelope. To what she says, what she wants, what she needs. He goes out of his way all the time to cater to it. He puts himself aside for her every. single. time.

On the plane when she gets upset about Tyler, we know Luke is upset with her, but he reaches out and physically offers her comfort anyways. In the forrest he’s more focused on her and making sure that she is okay than he is on finding Rossi or Green. He is at her side the entire time, only a few steps behind her when they do find Green.

All of this isn’t to say that Penelope is a bad person, I don’t think she is. I think that she’s been incredibly selfish this season, and I don’t think that this characterization of her is a good way to go, but I don't think Penelope Garcia is actually a bad person.

The thing with Luke, though is that they’ve taken her previous attitude towards him and pushed it beyond what it ever actually was. Yes, Penelope loves to tease him, but she's had plenty of genuine moments with him as well, which is why the line from the date makes no sense and was even a little cruel in the context of the larger picture. We know that Penelope thinks Luke is wonderful, she says it on the date, but I think she takes him for granted. He does all of these things for her, and sure a lot of them are unspoken and subtle, but they still make a huge difference. I don’t know if she doesn’t notice or if she’s just never thought about it, but she takes all of it, everything he is for her, everything he does, completely for granted.

Penelope has the capacity to be wonderful right back to Luke. She’s this incredibly kind person with a huge heart. All of her emotions are always so big. She cares so much about everything and everyone. She loves so deeply and so fully. And that’s what really gets me about all of this, because Penelope is that way about everyone else, but Luke is that way about her. She puts that care and that heart out into the world with so much intensity, but Luke puts that care and heart into her. If she would only recognize it, see it for what it is, see how wonderful and rare it is to find someone who treats you like that. Someone who loves you so much that he is willing to put everything to the side for you, to go out of his way for you over and over and over again, without expecting anything in return. Because he doesn't ever ask her for anything more than what she is willing to give.

And that's what would make Luke and Penelope so insanely wonderful. If she would just treat him the way that he treats her, then it wouldn't be so one sided. The worst part is that Penelope Garcia is more than capable of putting just as much care and love into Luke as he does for her.

But she doesn’t. And I can’t for the life of me understand why.

[quilandscroll]

Gotta rant or I’m gonna go more nuts

Ugh… that feeling when you truly feel people only pretend to like you because they want to be in your best friend’s good graces.

I’ve dealt with it before sure, kinda comes with having an artist bestie… people love her tons, and what’s not to love she’s the greatest friend I’ve ever had

but… having people in chats, and groups and such completely pretend I’m not there or blatantly talk around me just to have her full attention.. it kinda sucks.. especially after the same people “promise” that I’m a “good friend and they support”… it all feels like a lie when the actions never match the words..

It’s reaching a point where even she has seen it so obvious and is tired of it too..

I love that she can make new friends easily, and I encourage it when they genuinely like her..

But it makes me question daily… what makes me so hated?? I mean.. I’ve gone through this for over a decade and only now hit my wall to even try to talk about it.. I genuinely don’t understand..

Sorry for the ramble and thanks for letting me get it out.

Have a good day to anyone that does, or doesn’t read this.

[soranmbane]

Undertale Month Day 2

And here we have my flash fiction for day 2's prompt, "Flowey." This one was kinda fun to write. ^.^

Story under the cut, and previous story can be found here.

There are truly few things more mind numbing and dispiriting than hanging around your own grave, invisible and incorporeal, unable to move or speak or touch anything. I did have alternatives, of course. The most obvious option was to reset, which would be rude. The blatantly healthiest option was to simply pass on to a peaceful rest, but “healthy” wasn’t really my style. So there I was one particular day, in my self-inflicted limbo, hovering above that patch of golden flowers with little better to do than contemplate the glow of the sunlight on the golden flower petals.

And then a new flower suddenly sprouted up, just beyond the rest of them. I watched with mild curiosity as he stared down at my grave with a furrowed brow, saying nothing for several seconds.

“… Hey,” he said eventually, glancing off toward some far corner of the chamber. “So what's new with you?”

I didn't answer. Because I couldn't, obviously.

“... Oh what, are you too good to talk to me now?” he said after a few seconds.

Once again, I said nothing.

“... Yeah, I knew you were gonna say that,” he answered back haughtily.

After several more seconds of silence, he slumped forward onto the ground with an exasperated groan. “Ugh! Why do I bother?” he whined to himself. “ You're no good at conversation anymore…”

Probably because I'm dead, idiot, I thought bitterly.

“And, yeah, I know it’s cuz you're dead,” he snapped back at the words he couldn't possibly have heard, before adding under his breath “I can practically hear that stupid, snide voice from beyond the grave…”

He sighed and stood his stem upright again. “Anyway, I just came here to tell you that yesterday was Halloween,” he said. “I remember you telling me about how this was the only holiday you really got to celebrate on the surface, so I figured I should get you a gift.”

One of his vines burst out of the ground, wrapped around what appeared to be a small jack o’ lantern-shaped chocolate covered in festive orange and black tin foil.

“I stole this from an idiot baby,” he said with a wink. “By which I mean Frisk. I thought you'd appreciate it more if there was crime involved.”

He… wasn't wrong.

Dropping the candy on the ground, he used his vine like a drill to dig a small hole in the soft soil near my grave, pushed the chocolate inside, and began to bury it.

“There,” he said, using his vine to pat down the last bit of soil. “Now don't try saying I never did anything for ya.”

As if I’d have any right to claim that, given how we’d met.

“Welp, I guess I oughta get going,” he said as his vine retracted back into the earth. “Got important things to do today. Photosynthesizing, stalking losers…” His face shifted into that fanged, demonic mask. “Tormenting my victims.” It shifted back to… normal. “Y’know, normal flower stuff like that. See ya around, pal.” He offered one last cheerful wink, and burrowed back into the ground.

And I was left alone again, grappling with the shadow of an emotion I was no longer capable of feeling.

[polutrope]

hello 💌 i’d like to request a prompt from the modern au list: beren/lúthien and 27. thank you 🥺

27. Meeting significant other’s family for the first time Thank you for the prompt! I'm sorry, this became something sad and sentimental. Advisory for deceased and sick parents and general parent-child angsty feelings. ~1.1k, Rated G. Posting these to AO3, here. Prompt list (prompts closed). Beleria Cast of Characters

Beren reached for Lúthien’s hand and inhaled deeply of the crisp night air. It was cool, but not so cold they needed gloves, and her slender fingers twined between his were hardly touched by the cold. He turned a wistful smile on her.

“What is it?” she said. Her grey eyes caught the light of the street lamp and twinkled.

“Oh, I was just remembering the first time you had me to dinner with your parents.” Beren chuckled.

“I’m glad you’re laughing,” said Lúthien, and her tone hardened. “I still haven’t forgiven my dad for how condescending he was with you. Ugh, he can be such an ass.”

“Yeah,” Beren said thoughtfully. It was true: Elu had been, well, awful. And Beren hadn’t felt comfortable visiting again for months, not sure that he could withstand further implicit — but blatantly obvious — rejection of himself and his background. He’d borne it bravely the one time, but his carefully reconstituted sense of self-worth was more fragile than it looked.

But Elu had repented of his attitude. As Mayor he’d even spearheaded Beleria’s initiative to make it easier for immigrants like his parents had been to get secure, meaningful employment in education and healthcare and sustainability — it was how Beren had found his position with the nature conservancy.

And Elu loved Lúthien as much as Beren did, with a depth of history that he could never understand.

“Listen, birdie,” said Beren, stopping their progress down the sidewalk to look into her eyes. “Parents aren’t perfect. But trust me: you’ll regret it when something happens to him if you’re still holding on to those grudges.”

She frowned, then shook the mood off with a frustrated flail. “I’m sorry, babe. You’re right. I just… Like, I know he’s trying to hide it but I can tell he doesn’t want to let me go. I don’t want to see him every week! But then I feel guilty. Once a week isn’t that much, but with everything else… ugh, I’m sorry. I’m being selfish.”

“Nah, you’re not,” said Beren. “My dad drove me nuts when he was still around. I mean, he’s the reason I went into oil and gas. You think I wanted that? I hated it, it went against everything I believed in, and it drained me of motivation to do anything else. But he worked so hard all his life, fled his home with a hundred dollars and the clothes on his back and built it all up from there. I couldn’t just not do what he wanted for me. But I resented him for it. Every day. It’s a shitty thing to say but I don’t think I would have gotten out of Dorthon if he hadn’t died. Still, I miss him.”

Beren blinked back the press of tears behind his eyes and absently rolled his thumb over his dad’s ring that he always wore. They didn’t talk about Barahir often — it was Emeldir’s worsening condition and the constant paperwork and phone calls and visits required just to get her the minimum of care that took up most of his time and energy.

Lúthien stopped them again and cupped Beren’s cheek with her free hand. “Hey,” she said, “I want to meet him.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve put up with my — insufferable, insane, but beloved — parents dozens of times, but we’ve never visited Barahir. Let’s go. Maybe even have a Yule dinner with him.”

Beren smiled. “Yeah, okay,” he said. “That would be nice.”

*

As usual when Lúthien got an idea in her head, she was eager to realise it at the earliest opportunity. They made the drive out to Dorthon the weekend before Yule, cancelling other plans with Elu and Melian in order to do so (they’d left it to Melian to pass the news onto her husband).

There was snow coming down on the highway when they reached the mountains, but Beren was as ever impressed by Lúthien’s skill behind the wheel. He shouldn’t be. There wasn’t much she wasn’t good at, but she had a humility that made you forget it.

“How much farther to the exit?” she asked, and Beren fumbled for his phone to check the map.

“Uuhh, Exit 27. No wait. 26b.”

“Okay, how far is that?”

“I can’t tell… oh shit!”

“Oh shit, what!”

“Shit, shit, that’s it,” said Beren, frantically pointing at the right side of the road.

Lúthien remained far calmer, expertly crossing three lanes and sliding into the exit lane not a moment too soon. “Dammit, you’re the worst navigator!” she said, but she was laughing.

Shortly they were bumping down the gravel road to the river where Beren and his sister had scattered Barahir’s ashes three years ago. The snow continued to accumulate, at least an inch thick now, and Beren chewed his lip nervously.

“Stop worrying,” said Lúthien. “We’ll get out of here fine. And if not, well! We’ll have to walk.”

They pulled over beside the rough trail down to the river. The world was still and silent as they stepped from the car except for the crunch of their boots in the fresh snow. Beren bundled his scarf around his neck and grabbed the bag of cold turkey sandwiches from the back seat.

The sun set even earlier up here and the sky was already turning grey by the time they got to the river.

“I hope we don’t have the wrong spot,” Beren fretted. All they’d left to mark his dad’s last resting place was an engraved wood slice nailed to a pine tree. “Maybe we should just pick a spot and have the sandwiches and go, it doesn’t really matter—”

“Is this it?” Lúthien interrupted. She brushed her gloved hand over a slab of wood to reveal the inscription, its crude letters filled in and white with snow.

In memory of Barahir Escarra 1970 to 2020

Beren’s throat closed over at the sight. “Yeah, that’s it,” he said.

He couldn’t stop the tears springing to his eyes. At once Lúthien was at his side, winding her arms around him, and he clung to her while his tears spilled freely. Each little river momentarily froze on his skin and he found he welcomed the sting of their cold salty tracks: they made his grief and relief and love into something physical, emotions he could truly feel as they left him.

“I’m glad we came,” he said, sniffing and laughing meekly at his state. “Thank you.”

Lúthien squeezed him and buried her face in his jacket. She was crying, too.

[tired-biscuit]

ugh speaking of dry humping, i can just imagine naruto pushing ur ass down on his dick and thrusting upward in slo-mo while moaning into your mouth

his dick is nice and snug right against your clothed pussy and he feels so warm as he rubs himself against you; all hard and throbbing. he's kissing you deeply, pushing you down with the help of his hands on your hips. as you start responding, rocking more fiercely against him whilst tugging on his golden hair, his mouth pops open all of a sudden and he's like, "w-wait... wait, baby, wait...!"

but you don't wait; you're too busy chasing your high. you're so into it, so into him - it's obvious. you're nearly melting into his very heart, trying to grab as much as you can of him. you kiss him and attempt to taste every inch of the inside of his mouth. you say his name like it's a chant. you need him, you need him, you need him. you love him.

"need you inside me, naru... need you to fuck me."

and as a result, his eyes are squeezing shut and he starts to moan like a little whore. his toes curl and his shoulders slump. he nearly shivers because of the warmth that spills into his underwear as he lets out a weak, "fuck."

the poor boy came right into his pants from how hot he finds you whenever you're so blatantly needy for him :(

[plasticfangtastic]

Can We Be Lonely Together? Ch. 11

A Homelander X Stalker! Reader fanfic

This is also a supe! reader fic, GN reader but male leaning.

Author's note: Thanks for all who've read this so far, only 1 more chapter to go unsure if I shoudl write a short epilogue. This is a long chapter, wanted to post this last Sat. but R.L. got in the way.

R18+ mild smut, murder mention, cheating, bruise kink, drug mention, long chapter.

Chapter 11

For us

After the cops showed up, the evening had become a blur, cops had come over the bullet that shook the whole floor, conveniently soon your neighbor had called the cops about an out of control supe, Homelander had stepped out claiming that his friend had called him frightened by the gunshot sounds, the neighbor melted at the sight of the handsome Super accepting a quick CashApp transfer to paid for damages after exchanging details for Vought lawyers, while throwing a quick embarrassing lie about allergens and the physiological nature of superpowers.

You hadn’t care much for it as moments after– you were flung around his shoulders and taken miles away, back into Vought towers not the 62 floor but down the basements’s besements, beneath layers of concrete, in walls so thick you could’ve bet your ass you were trapped in the same facility that once held Homelander– but instead of bare walls and stilted air conditioner breeze, you got beeping machines , a nurse looked over as your eyes opened, saying nothing towards you, instead to your guest of honor, Homelander lowered his copy of “Reminders of Him” he waved his hand urgently towards the nurse to leave. 

He had been so caring making sure of emptying the floor leaving only a single nurse and doctor left hovering around for your comfort.

“Morning Pusher.”

A light smile crossed your lips, the way Homelander had mentioned your “hero” name made it blatantly obvious of whom he was referring to deep down, it was amusing.

“It must’ve been fate… that both me and your arch nemesis names rhyme.”

“Some sweet irony I recond, you’re far cuter than William if that’s any consolation.”

“You still jerked off to that guy.”

“The accent… is irresistible.”

He clicked his tongue straightening himself, placing a nude hand on your forehead brushing loose strands off your face.

“I prefer you over William." His face turned stern-- Your body is wrecked. The V… has likely caused you permanent cognitive decline, you suffered loss of gray matter according to the doctor, which made your already unstable powers even more unstable. The V was just a piece of sticky tape holding what it had broken… your heart is fairly erratic and your blood pressure” he shakes his head wide eyed– is awful, even if you quit cold turkey your brain is ruined– you ain’t like A-Train you can’t get a new heart and be all hunky dory.”

“And the good news is…?”

“Your body will heal your cardiovascular system eventually, and maybe over time your healing abilities regardless of how limited they are… might heal your brain… but I already have a couple supes in mind that could potentially help you.”

“Basically I did this to myself.”

It hurt taking fistfuls of your blanket, harsh lines formed on the bridge of your nose.

“Pusher… ugh… Y/N you can’t take anymore V! I can keep you here where it’s quiet until you start feeling better.”

It failed to sound like a request.

“You already told Deep about me… am surprise you didn’t kill him”

You changed the topic.

“He was pleading and crying telling me he was being blackmailed by you. Sounded like something you would do.”

He stroke circles on your forehead leaning closer until his body rested entirely on the bed’s handles, pulling his chair towards you breaching in all the remaining space as his book felt with a loud thud into the ground, he wanted to laid beside you but all the cables put him on edge that just too much pressure and your already thin veins will pop open, squirting all over the place. In truth both him and John had known of your health simply blaming to your use of V and other narcotics, hoping it would cure itself. Yet you pulled on his sleeve raising your arm above your head urging him to join, his eyes turned black and wide rushing in an instant to taste your warmth, relaxing as your heartbeat picked up– it excited him, reassuring him that it was still functional.

Placing his hand delicately around your stomach, a flash of sound creeps into your mind thinking of the corpse in your bedroom. 

It had been a long two day coma while Homelander watched and allowed selected hands to touch you. You kissed the top of his head having a quiet conversation where neither of you spoke, just the sound of the machines and fingers exploring surfaces and each other, both hoping that this tranquility would last a minute longer.

“What did you tell John? About Firecracker, and shit?”

“John is asleep for now… I broke up with her'' He shoved his hand into a hidden compartment on the back of his belt pulling out a thin albeit outdated iphone– see I texted her.”

It was a long chain of message bubbles after a simple “We’re done ;)” he kept scrolling down her replies hadn’t really stopped for the last two days.

“He’s angry at me… but I told him that Firecracker was a fling… why waste our time with that! When this works so well– I told him that you forgive him… us, and that you’re here because of your drug habit.”

He kissed the bottom of your jowl, scooting closer as if that was even possible.

“You lied to him?”

“Lying to oneself doesn’t count, pumpkin.” He murmured against your neck– I told Ashley to keep an eye for her just in case she tries making a scene… she’ll be more than just fired if she tries to get back at me.”

“Or I could just read her mind and give you the heads-up.”

That got him excited.

“I’ll make sure it’s all perfect.” he kissed you again.

He kissed your chest, catching a whiff of your sweat, scrunching his hand on your blanket, two days of watching you immobile terrified him, to think you wouldn’t be there to cuddle him until he sleep, of stroking his hair gently until he woke up from his nightmares, of never feeling your tender flesh shivering under him.

He needed you to comfort him… always.

He wanted you next to him for every dawn to come.

“That girl… she was… she was my mother…” His eyes were hidden but you felt their sting– I look a lot like my grandfather… His name is Otto y’know. That aunt of mine, she looks nothing like her. John was happy… that you did all of that to give us a family, I might need your help to calm him down about wanting to meet them, our cousins are still young so we can’t hang out but Ryan could”

“You took the body to the police…?”

It had been a strange memory to witness, Homelander had called the last detective that had kept working on the cold case, personally flew him to witness the corpse while selling him a crazy story, his biological grandmother had dementia and cancer so it would’ve been impossible to get any information corroborating Homelander claim that she was another one of Vought Compound V recipients, and the receipt he had faked held too much weight.

His aunt had come this morning, her hair a mess and her skin clammy– she had been frightened. 

A ghost slept peacefully in the metal slab, hardly touched by time questioning nothing about the V, simply accepting that it would be something her parents could’ve done.

The corpse was still fresh, by the time it had traveled from your home to the Vought morgue, it had shown no signs of deterioration, her skin still dewey and peach, her lips still pink and her fingers still soft, the pathologist was just as baffled as to how her body stood so fresh, ever her eyes were wet– she was dead but her body had missed the memo.

The woman had shared, that their mother had been a professional ballerina, she had traveled the world until she met Otto a man 12 years her junior, and decided to start a family– Frida had been talented but her mother was cruel forcing her to dance until all her toes had broken twice, and her father desired nothing but perfection from her which was rich coming from a drunk. She had ran away, and for two weeks they assumed she was with some boy that had caught her fancy… Homelander was the only man who knew the truth.

Even thinking of it in your arms made him whimper, lingering on the memory of his mother fading warmth, John dawdled on the memory while staring at her untouched corpse… of what if’s– Would he have grown loved? This woman was only eleven years older than him, could've been more sister than aunt, would he have been spoiled by her? Would he have grown to be a dancer like his grandmother? Or a gymnast like his grandfather? 

John wanted to tell them somehow.

To agree that his mother had been a runaway, who met a boy got pregnant and due to her circumstances was unable to get an abortion, that she gave birth at a clinic ran by Samaritan’s embrace who gave him V, and soon after she had run away leaving Homelander nothing but a short papertrail, John could’ve sold the Vought storyline, that he was adopted by his fake TV parents or diverge… Claim she was found by Vought one way or another willfully handling her infant to them. No matter how he tried to sell it, his mother couldn’t be a martyr, she couldn’t be pious– if he wanted to lie to them.

His Aunt held the corpse until her whimpers and the cries of animals were indistinguishable, waking him from his trance.

Grateful that Homelander had finally brought her peace, that she could finally grieve and heal, to know her sister had come home… They had wished you'd been there… the way the woman stared at him– had his design evoke a deja-vu? She showed him pictures of her sons and how one looked just like her sister, as if he didn’t look carved from the same stone as Homelander, the teenage boy looked so much like him even if the nose was all wrong.

You stroke his hair, seeking to comfort him for John was too upset and only wanted to sleep, to remain oblivious to all… angry and upset at his brother.

It would be a couple more days before you were allowed out the infirmary, an armed bodyguard escorted you home, your place had been cleaned– not a spec of hair or dust had been left behind and all your damaged furniture had been replaced with identical replicas, your fridge had been restocked of all expired items and made to look brand new, even the damaged wall had been completely repainted leaving it with a glossy finish, your clothes had been neatly folded and not even one single dirty sock had been left on the plastic laundry basket.

The guard had been given a simple instruction to make sure you made it home safely, and for you to pack a day bag as Homelander had requested your stay for a couple days, just as a precaution, you obeyed making sure to take some of your ingredients to cook for him as a thanks for doing so much.

He had doctors check on you daily, monitoring what he’d already recorded in his brain and made sure to think very loudly too, readying your medication for you, watching you take it even using his X-ray vision to make sure the Buprenorphine and others went down your throat, taking great care to carefully drop your beta blockers eye drops, watching your veins and heart react to it– Homelander had forced a routine and you comply not out of fear but out of novelty. Nobody had once cared for you in such way, he prepared your baths and clothes making sure to join you and wash your back, glad you always returned the favor. He had demanded Deep to restock the department. By the end of the second week of your stay, the entire department had been returned to its former glory, something your supervisor Anika was over the moon about, you couldn’t afford to stress your frail heart and damaged brain..

Before you knew it, you were barefoot in the kitchen humming old songs while a precocious child asked for your help with homework, Ryan had wanted all sorts of company more than anything– he had figure out his father had a soft spot for you, he was a spoiled child and out of the two adult he had access to (the second being Ashley) you were the only one willing to talk over with his dad about friends coming over and sleepovers… as if you both didn't have a tracker on the kid to make sure he was safe, plus you had him wired, there wasn’t a single childish conversation that you weren’t privy to anyhoo– mic or not.

Homelander had made routines and ceremonies, he would come home and your scenes began: the welcome homes, the picking of his gloves in lieu of coats and fedoras, a cold glass of milk while awaiting for dinner, listening to him catching up with Ryan, rubbing his shoulders after dinner (not that he felt it but it was a kind gesture nevertheless) and then the pre-bed cultus– washing his hair, listening to his loud moan as your fingers stroke roughly at his scalp, washing his back and letting his pamper you with lotion more expensive than it should be legal to sell, giggling alone as he wiped out the car polisher not that he understood what made it so funny to you, your conversations one sided only the sound of your voice filled the void within marbled walls, he loved the sound of his voice but there was a comfort that came from this unique brand of silence, constantly testing just how sharp your powers were, forcing himself to get used to them.

Homelander invited you to bed, suffocating you with his unusually high body temperature.

Kissing you until both your lips were bruised, nipping at your skin and painting purple constellations, marking you– this was his own brand of chains and collars, softer on your skin than metal, making sure nobody in this building would dare staring at his beloved, to remind you he was whom you belonged to, lost in the storm that was your eyes as you watched him paint you, feeling how hot your body became as he teased you further, your touch, your voice and your sight poisoned him with a love he was certainly began to doubt he deserved, how could you look at him so tenderly as he bit with such possessiveness, after forgiving his impulses.

As your apartment became more bare, and your fridge was left with nothing but unopened water bottles, you settled officially as a live-in maid.

In the eyes of Vought employees– of the few aware of your presence that had been his cover-up. Somewhat demeaning but it was the closest you both could get to a normal relationship at the time– you were a whole can of worm of dangerous loose ends, both your friends were clean on the outside: a rising star of the culinary world and former Supe whose extraordinary senses, could had once detected the smell of a bomb hidden inside an airport from the entrance or detected a trapped stranger under meters of rubble with just her hearing; Now used her keen senses to create extraordinary dishes. Your former handler, an accomplished journalist married to a high profile New York socialite with pedigree, A man who rubbed shoulders with the upper echelons of New York and country.

Two people whom it made sense for them to be friends with each other– not you.

A mystery with no past, no presence, no real name, and a long list of suspicious crimes, your friends were career criminals using their wealth and status to hide their amorality, how you came to befriend a cannibal and a two-face crook… not to mention Roman Ban and company was a mystery.

Homelander couldn’t even be certain that these friends of yours even knew your real name, or if they would as he burned all proof left in the Vought archives.

Homelander cleaned house for you. 

If he ever wanted to present you to the world, he was going to make sure all your affairs were in order… Roman’s wife had received quite the visit when he found the star spangled icon in her living room, more surprised to learn he wasn’t just shorter in person but was quite the personality, all she needed was a head on her piano and a hefty manila folder curated by you to behave. His wife was smart enough to know when to give up, she had young grandkids to protect, and Homelander had been nice enough to remind her that her family had inherited a large sum.

In the face of death and money people were painfully predictable.

John had come from his slumber playing pretend around you both, letting his brother feed him talking points, as you helped Ryan set the lighting for his latest film you could hear them both catching up as his son watched his father do its weird staring routine.

Reminding yourself that you couldn’t reply to his silent questions, to open your mouth and to not be perfectly in sync with him.

Alone at last, as Ryan slept– he handed you the last pill for the day.

“Your heart is sounding a lot better.”

“It would be a lot better if you would slip me a buspirone or a xanax.”

He didn’t laugh, hiding your teeth under a hard line you avoided that judgemental glare, he had a hundred questions about what happened with his mother but he wasn’t ready to let you think he was crazy, his mind already toying with the idea of introducing you both, brushing your hair imagining crushing your neck if you responded the wrong way, kissing your neck right at the spot where he thought your bone would tear the skin open, the way you smell more and more like him filled him with delight, steering him away from such intrusive thoughts.

“Just joking mi sol… something bothering you?”

“Roman’s wife, she backed down but… his kids are continuing the investigation… should I give them a visit?”

He wanted reassurance, the way he stroked your neck down to your back watching your lungs inflate as you leaned into the black marble countertops.

“I almost want to say ‘I told you so, silly’ but I also wanna suggest a ‘team-up’”

He raised his eyebrow urging you to speak.

“I need to make a phone call.”

You dial an all too familiar number, even late at night you knew Bruno would answer your call– after all it had to be serious and urgent if Kent wasn’t answering your calls.

“Hey, I need to speak to Kent urgently.”

Bruno closed a door behind putting you on speaker as he walked around his lavish house.

“He’s in the office… I am starting to suspect he might’ve fallen asleep on his desk. I was just about to send one of my men to check up on him. He’s been covering the presidential election so he's been up and down the whole country following that Neuman…eugh”

“Not a fan? I’ll swing by his office then I’ll let you know if he's there… I was on my way there anyhoo.”

“That chick screams champagne liberal. Give her 2 weeks in office before she conveniently forgets all her selling points, plus have you seen her VP… anyways it was nice talking to you, ciao.” 

You turned to John.

“What are you planning?”

“One of the things I would’ve used on Roman before you decided to kill him, call it Plan G. Now let me get a coat… y’know where the USA network offices are in the city right?”

He nodded and followed you as you took a coat and brushed your hair as neatly as you could with your hands.

“Let me take care of you, John. Let me take some of the weight of the world off your shoulders… you don't have to be Atlas on your own.”

Your hands wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer, always watching him with that adoration not adulation in your big eyes.

Eyes had hardly moved him before he met yours, none would ever move them as much yours could, pulled by your invisible strings, he reluctantly agreed, he understood why his brother had strongly fallen for you.

Flying about the city, watching a myriad of colors, the city so quiet from this height. you arrived at the offices entering from the roof after breaking the roof door locks.

The offices were near empty, especially at this hour–a couple souls stayed behind working but unsurprisingly for Homelander you knew where you needed to go and the few that were around didn’t take note of you, mostly focusing on the hero close by, 

Spotting his office you couldn’t even bother to knock.

“Don’t believe him when he says he thinks your article was incredible, he has definitely not read it.”

A couple files and knacks fell off his desk, as a young man's head came from behind the desk edge, mouth still sticky and Kent trying everything he could to hide his phallus.

“You know he's married with seven kids, right?” Your attention turned to your friend as you sat on the chair across from them– You’re lucky ‘cuz your husband was about to send one of his men to come check on you. Now scram!”

The man red like a beet wiped his face with his sleeve and with wobbly steps hurried out, turning suicidal and on the verge of tears as he saw Homelander blocking the door, shocked at the morbid chagrin on the Supe’s face, flashing his fangs as he watched the college intern run for his life.

“You blocked my number.”

“I said I never wanted to see you again.”

His fluster died down, putting his cock back in his trousers, throwing Homelander a dirty glance from the side, unafraid of the demon in spandex.

“Look if you had seven kids you would understand how sexless your life gets”

He said to Homelander for some odd reason, not that the man cared.

“What you don’t like waiting for the kids to go to sleep to have a quick fuck?” He replied, slightly irritated as you grinned towards Kent– can we get this over with, babe.”

“I agree with your owner. What do you want?”

“Release the news on Fowler Ban. Perks of babysitting his kids all this time… I got you enough shit to destroy that lil’shit.”

“What the crack, underage prostitutes or the possible murder?”

“All of it. Get the guys at Banvision distracted and away from me and him, now that Fowler and Sean took over the company it’d be perfectly timed.” You paused looking at the cumstains on the carpet– Fowler did kill that waitress at Bruno’s charity ball three years ago. I already emailed you the proof, check your spam folder.”

He turned to Homelander, he could see the scary supe but all he could think of was the small frightened little boy that was left alone in the dark for days until some lab coated freak remembered to feed him, he threw you a curious look figuring out that you had stayed silent about the dead kids, since that day Kent had been counting the days before he had to report on the end of the United States.

“Is not leverage you can use on me, and you should know that Kent.” You spat.

“I don’t want to die.” he chuckles– just surprised he’s kept you… Y/N is a handful, do you have what it takes to care for it?”

Kent stood up, wanting to see how far into the lion’s mouth he could put his fingers before its mawls dropped, Kent moved around until he could take your face pulling your chin up to examine the collar of hickeys, deducting just how possessive your new owner was from this alone and not the blinkers reflecting at the edge of his glasses, Kent pets your hair, stroking your cheeks with an intimacy that should only be known to Homelander.

“You will make him hate you in due time.”

“You hated me?” Homeland jumped as he heard your heart pick up.

“No. It takes a special kind of person to care for you… all your past lovers ran from you or stopped being good enough. Somebody always came by that ignited a flame… this one” He pointed at Homelander– you must be just as insane as they are to last this long”

“Get your fucking paws off Pusher before I shove your spinal cord up your own ass.”

A red light crossed the space between the two, earning Kent a chuckle even if his heart rate was highly elevated.

“Pusher. Damn… he even knows that… you must genuinely love him. I’ll write the piece not because I want to help you but because it’ll do me good in the long run. I trust Pusher to keep quiet about the intern, will you?”

“why would–

“We’ll stay quiet about Holsen. Is not like Homelander cares about your affairs.”

The red didn’t dissuade him, Kent continued to stroke you, gingerly teasing the man as the light continue to illuminate the room, Homelander didn’t attack more out of fear that this man would use you as a meat shield, mudblood or exalted being, it was hard to tell and he wouldn't risk a single scratch on your face, the way he held you so still as if you feared him, but more so the fact that you didn’t fight Kent, your sight solely focused on the skinny man.

Whatever he was thinking, whatever Homelander wasn’t privy to– had you enrapture, your heart rate erratic and the bitter stench of adrenaline attacking his nostrils.

“Don’t bother me again.”

He let go of you, even as you stood up your sight continued to follow Kent, taking Homelander’s arm as you pulled him out the office, trying to close the door behind you.

“By the way– you still interested in the Stillwell kid? I can have Dolores swing him a visit if you still convinced it's his bastard.”

He snorted as the door closed behind you thanks to the last bit of inertia.

You Froze, Kent was a vindictive man already sitting on his computer without care, you were a loose end for him, getting rid of you was the end goal, knowing this made your tongue bitter, you choked gasping slightly as your head crook towards your partner, his mouth agape, shaking slightly he watched the man every move, seeing how nonchalant he was behaving.

“What…w-what is he talking about… is he talking about Teddy?” The way his name rolled of his tongue was acrid, the vision of that child still in her arms, still stealing his most precious possession, the weightlessness of the child in his grip as he taunted Madelyn and Butcher, or its crying as he placed him on a bed of grass a few houses away from the explosion behind them and the temptation to have left him there, to let go of his love for that traitorous woman, but out of what little love he had clung to he made sure he would live– what the fuck is he talking about?”

“I… John… I swear I was going to tell you, I just didn’t see the need to stress you out so much after what happened to the girl” You clung to him forcing him to watch you plead, to feel your trembling being– I don’t even have any proof just a suspicion I discussed with Kent ages ago. He’s just being a bitch.”

“Why?” His voice is cold, still like a statue– why do you think Teddy was mine?”

Telling him the truth was out of the question, you knew just how bad he would be but in his mind he kept lingering on the last seconds of Stillwel’s life fantasizing that soon it would be your face copying hers, awaitign with his heart in histhroat for you to give him the wrong reply.

“There were no documents of Stillwell taking any IVF treatment– in the sense that there was no outside clinic she attended to receive it, she received multiple sessions but there were no receipts… I was bored trying to find something to give to Roman. I thought it was odd, in the end I found out she received the treatment at Vought obviously… She received two rounds of ICSI as part of her IVF treatment which proved successful.”

“ICSI…?”

“It’s what’s done in cases of male infertility.”

His eyes redden but he refused to cry, a strange half smiled creeped as he scoffed, her brows touched his mind racing.

“I thought that maybe… it was yours… because I mean everybody knew you two were close. I had no proof John, and you told me you couldn’t have kids easily.”

“You should’ve told me.”

“Why? To stress you out!? To make you think that this William Butcher that’s been haunting you down– who brought your father to kill you! Also tried to kill your kid! He tried taking Ryan from you, yet he gleefully would’ve murder your other son!?” The poorly lit fluorescence office lost all its color as his blue eyes faded in and out a red hue– It was just a passing comment.”

John pushed your hands away, moving further away from you stomping on some of the desk in his way, a mare flick out of frustration sends desks crashing, cables sparkling as paper flew and screens cracked.

“I tried to kill Theodore. I was going to let Butcher blow himself and the kid… I hated Teddy… he took what was mine” His tongue spits that sentence with poisonous resentment– she was mine! And then she had that fucking handbag! Do you have any idea… do you have any idea of what it will do to me… if that kid… if Teddy is mine?”

“No, all I know is that I’ll be here for you. Madelyn hurt you… if she hid that from you… after knowing all these years you two were together just how much you wanted to have a family, if she did that and robbed you of your right to be there for him– then I’ll be there to help you deal with whatever it’d be that hurts you… I’m sorry I didn’t mention it, I am sorry if I had proof I would’ve told you but I had nothing!”

“Too high to remember to bring that up?”

“Pretty much.”

A part of him wanted you to flinch, to cry a little more but you returned to your icy demeanor.

How easy it came for you to switch, thinking of that man behind the door he had at least figured out whom you learned that from.

Homelander waved his arms in defeat, you didn’t chase after him.

He wouldn’t come home until dawn. 

Left alone in the apartment after catching an Uber. He arrived through the balcony door as Ryan got ready for school and you packed his lunch, as you decorated his healthy bento box, he came in– his hair out of place, and his eyes puffy, his scowl sharper than your knife.

“Breakfast is almost done– made quiche muffins!”

Your eyes focused on slicing carrot sticks.

He stood silent watching you from the kitchen entrance.

“You look like you had too much tequila.” Your voice is meek– you want some coffee?”

“I went to see my aunt… just watched her from afar… then I went to Malta, found a small town, and just sat on people’s roof listening to these European hicks.”

“You killed them?”

You kept working casually, your indifference was comforting him.

“No. I just watched the sea… walked around the coast lines… broke some boats… is actually quite lovely. Malta… Monaco and Albania are quite beautiful… I should take you both to visit one day”

“Am I going to find out you sank a small mediterranean island in a minute?”

“I killed nobody…” His tone was so frank it was out of place– but I drank, found a winery… drank, puked a bit… kept drinking… I just… kept wondering about in the mediterranean…”

He told the truth, he had killed a couple animals and destroyed a small reef yet he had simply gotten buzzed, and pissed a lot.

He hadn’t cried which surprised you.

He wrapped his arms behind you, pressing his head against you, where it had always belonged he thought, your perfume a gentle caress after pointless meandering, his body fighting off the alcohol with ease there was hardly any remains of wine in his system but it remained in his breath, at least your skin was delicious.

John wanted to be enveloped in you, to be forever held and adored, all his rage melted at the sight of you still in your jammies, with an apron tied around you, your eyes were swollen and the bags under them just as big, but here you were doing everything you could to stay strong for a kid that wasn’t yours, and for him.

“You love me?”

“I love you… what’s wrong?” your worried pinch him.

“I don’t want to drink ever again… it tastes awful. I… Is not your fault, you had no reason to tell me about Teddy, no proof, nothing but a vague papertrail… but don’t ever hide anything from me… nothing… no matter what…”

He kissed trails at your nape, pushing you closer to him, his suit reek of the Ionian sea.

“Always be honest with me… my love. You know… maybe… we should get a cat… they’re low maintenance, we don’t have to walk them and they don’t bark… maybe a summer house in Monaco near the beach.”

You turned to face him, cleaning your hands before touching his face.

You kiss shy and exploratory, seeing how calm the beast was around you.

He kissed you, holding you so tight he had to remind himself not to break you, restraining himself, wanting you so close to wash Palermo off his skin.

"Two cats."

John almost had it all… A family he was too afraid to talk to, the grandparents who could do so much better than that old person’s home, and he had Ryan now, he had you and possibly another child.

Thoughts of your breakdown, of your fantasy that he had almost ruined– John would give you that.

The house, the children, the animals and the tree.

He kissed you, grinding on your body pressing you roughly against the edge of the counter, intertwining his hands against you, quickly unwrapping your apron, exploring the flesh beneath the layers.

You giggled, as his touch tickled your goosebumps, his fingers warm against your cold skin

It was the only music he wanted.

Your laugh filling all these sorrowful spaces, he could see it so vividly, he could live in these fake future memories, you in this kitchen baby talking to the cats… he could brave the litter boxes, if that meant you would be there.

Ryan shouted from across the living room asking where his smartwatch was, you both stopped holding each other, planting playful kisses on each other in your forced departures.

He threw you that charming smile that melted your heart, as he ripped his soiled jacket off and headed down to help Ryan, throwing his boots without care.

Your fingers traced your lips, tasting him still.

John was a sweet boy. A hotheaded, capricious creature, his impetuous nature was part of his charm.

John… you loved him… loved him too much… loved that damaged lil’boy, he was earnest in his desire to bring that fantasy to life, he loved you, he thought of you half way through it all.

He thought of you as he undressed and touched her velvety walls, he thought of you as he stopped himself and flew to the other side of the world, he thought of his brother and you as he drank for the first and last time in his life.

In his lips were the leftovers of her spit, washed away by wine. 

“It has to go… all of it… has to go… for us.”

I love you… but I had to make sure that in order for the both of us to be happy… I had to discipline you, in an absence of parents, in the absence of any responsible figure, I would.

The ‘Greywal & Co.’ sign staring down on me.

[ispridestillasin]

Okay, so in Part One of my Alador divorces Odalia Early AU I established Adrian and Alador getting together and hinted at Darius and Co. coming into the picture. Here’s (vaguely) how that goes. It’s pretty long though, so I put it under a cut so people could scroll past it. Have fun everyone!

At this point in the story, Alador and Adrian have been dating for around 6 months. Alador knows that Adrian is a new Coven Head and Adrian knows that Alador is working for a small company.

The thing about their relationship though, is that they’re both only just starting to realize that they're getting serious. Adrian initially started their relationship on a whim to get back at Darius for dropping him (Yeah they were fling buddies and then Darius cut him off, I’ll explain better later), and Alador just started it as a way to kickstart him getting over Odalia for good (Real healthy, I know). Now, though, Adrian’s realized that he’s caught (ugh) feelings for Alador, and Alador is starting to fall for Adrian. At first, Adrian tried to ghost Alador for a bit to distance himself and see if he could manage to shake the feeling. That didn’t work though and just made both him and Alador sad. So now Adrian decides that if Alador and his kids are going to be a part of his life, he’s going to make sure that Alador never sees the fucked up side of his personality.

Enter: Darius, Eberwolf, and the circus that’s the Coven Heads.

One day Alador asks Adrian if he can take care of Amity for a few hours, as he’s going to be a chaperone for the twins' school field trip and isn’t allowed to take Amity with him. Amity’s usual sitter was out of town and Alador didn’t feel comfortable leaving Amity with someone he hadn't fully vetted. Adrian’s a bit worried but agrees to take care of her for a few hours. Everything was going fine for the first few hours. Amity was left to play, and when she asked, he would play being her other doll. (“Oh now princess. The spell is too strong. How ever will I escape?” “I’ll save you, Princess!”) Just when he finished feeding her (and gave her a slice of fairy pie as a bribe to clean up her toys), he received a summon from the Emperor’s Coven.

Adrian briefly contemplates getting Amity a sitter, before deciding not to. Alador already said he didn’t feel comfortable leaving her alone with a random person, and really, Adrian had no idea where to even find a babysitter. So he decides to take Amity (who’s covered in fairy pie stains) to the coven meeting with him. Worse comes to worst, he can hand Amity over to one of the scouts and tell them to stand outside the door and watch her.

So Adrian shows up to the coven meeting with Amity in tow (and stained clothes, but he doesn’t know that yet).

So Adrian shows up with Amity in tow just as Head Witch Scooter shows up. The Bard Coven Head and the rest of the Coven Heads in the room do small talk before one of them asks why Adrian has a child with him (Scooter and Lilith are concerned about a child's proximity to Terra - I would be too - while the rest are just curious). Adrian’s about to answer (and probably about to piss them off), but just before he can Belos walks in (accompanied by the current Golden Guard, RIP Baby). Adrian quickly tells Belos that this will be the only time that Amity will appear at a meeting as he couldn’t find anyone to look after her on such short notice. Belos simply hums and tells Adrian that will be the only time that he will be allowed to have her in the meeting, as these are high-security meetings involving matters of the state (or Isle, I guess?). And yes, it does sound like a threat.

Meanwhile, Darius is mentally going ‘why the fuck is Blight going behind Odalia’s back with THIS’ throughout the entire meeting. Darius has no idea that Alador and Odalia are divorced, as Alador kept the fact that he's divorced on the DL. So Darius has no idea that Alador is divorced and thinks Alador is being blatantly obvious about his “affair”. He spends the entire meeting coming up with increasingly conspiracy theory-like ideas for why Adrian might be dating Alador and why he brought Amity to the coven meeting. Eventually, he has to accept the fact that A) Alador has questionable taste in people and B) Adrian really was just playing babysitter for the night.

Adrian agrees to Belos's thr-I mean request, and the coven meeting begins. The entire meeting is basically a mix of the Coven Heads going over Very Important and Serious Matters while also trying to put each other down/subtly threaten each other. (At one point someone points out Adrian’s stained clothes. Adrian looks at them like he’s going to murder them while still holding a fairy-pie-stained Amity who tugs on his hair.)

So the meeting proceeds and everyone gets to witness Adrian and Darius passive aggressively putting each other down every five minutes (Adrian is awfully smug for someone who has a toddler trying to chew their hair and covered in stains). Eberwolf lets Darius do his mental gymnastics while they take notes on the meeting because they love the chaos. Meanwhile, Belos is letting them get away with their interruptions/tangents because it amuses him to watch his subordinates fight each other, and hey, if everyone's too busy fighting each other then they won’t be looking too closely into what the Day of Unity actually means (too late babe, the Golden Guard is onto your lying ass!).

When the meeting is over, Adrian skips the Post-Coven Meeting drinking tour/meet up (just look at who’s in those coven meetings and try to tell me they don’t have one, I dare you) to drop Amity off and arrives at Blight Manor to Alador making dinner and the twins trying to help. Alador apologizes to Adrian about not hiring a sitter (Adrian left Alador a note about the coven meeting). Adrian says everything turned out fine, but that this would be the only time Emperor Belos would allow Adrian to attend a Coven meeting with Amity in tow.

And now I’m going to cut this off because if I don’t this post is going to get too long. Here’s to hoping that I post Part 3, AKA the Break Up Arc, soon. (Knowing me it probably won’t be for another few months. Sorry.)

[incomingalbatross]

Completely unedited and unexpanded reading notes on Tenthragon Ch. 8-19

Ch. 8

(filled with rage) Mary!!!!

That is all I have to say about chapter 8. This poor BABY. He doesn't understand how rules work! Scaring him doesn't HELP!

Okay wait I do have something else to say, and it's that I genuinely don't know what Hugh was getting at with his hints about Brendan's relationship to Paddy.

The obvious idea is that Brendan is Paddy's father, but then A) Hugh wouldn't hate Paddy if he weren't the Snake's son, right?? and B) Hugh says Paddy IS their cousin, implying he is ALSO something else.

This suggests a relation might be through Paddy's mother's side--was she a relation of theirs? I don't think she could be Hugh and Brendan's sister, though, because I think someone said she lived in China.

*throws up hands*

Ch. 9:

Paddy trying to hide from the Nightmare Guilt lurking in his mind is all too relatable. :(

Wait did Ellen say Hugh TOOK Paddy from his parents? I mean, no names obviously, but the baby mentioned has to be somebody we know and there's nobody else. How does THAT fit in here?

Ellen. Thank you for giving good advice, but also TAKE IT YOURSELF. If it's better to be punished by Brendan than kept in bondage by Hugh (and it IS), act on that? Don't ask the child to braver than you're being.

Ch. 10

Hugh: *tortures a child*

Hugh: UGH why are you always crying

I DO understand that he's replicating what Paddy's father did to him.

…That should really make him LESS surprised by the results.

Ch. 11:

All right, Hugh suffers SOME pangs of conscience. Not enough to actually face what he's doing, but some.

Ugggh this man. Wilfully fighting back against his softer feelings toward Paddy, of course, but I'm also just mad how he assumes Paddy will ENJOY misbehaving or breaking things. Even when Paddy says he doesn't want to! Hugh doesn't listen!

Ch. 12:

"surely you love him well enough to trust him?" That's the WHOLE THING, that's what Paddy can't get to, because he can't tell what's reasonable and what isn't so maybe a person like Brendon WOULD still cut his thumbs off for what he did! Maybe that's a reasonable consequence in Brendon's eyes! He can't piece together that that's incompatible with his love and respect for Brendon. Because he is a CHILD.

Hm, the sister lived in Other Thragoness all her childhood and Hugh refuses to say any more. Some evidence she could be Paddy's mother, then.

Oh NO poor BABY (he was caned)

Ch. 13:

Hugh: Hm. Why does hurting my baby cousin/nephew feel bad. Why am I trying to make him feel better. Why CAN'T I make him feel better by just pressing a button and magically turning off all his hurt feelings, it's like my actions have consequences

Ah yeah, Hugh's got a point, doesn't he? The "telling Brendon" threat isn't just empty, it's more likely to end HIS world instead of Paddy's.

Hugh: Well, having recreated my childhood trauma, I guess I'll recreate the consolations we got as well! Please don't examine any of this too closely (SUCH a mess)

And he literally HAS a way out of this self-created trap. Brendon wants to tell him Paddy's here! He is asking for an opportunity! And Hugh decides to keep going with the layers of lies instead.

"Hugo mio" aw that's cute

"DON'T TELL ME HE'S LIKE ROBIN I DON'T LIKE THOSE IMPLICATIONS"

"You would like him yourself if you knew him." OOF

Ch. 14:

Can't believe Paddy told Hugh he was "mean" for the first time ever and it was over Hugh's teasing him with a glimpse of "the baby"

(Also that Paddy's immediate reaction to hearing the baby was in the house was "Brendon doesn't like it better than me?" <3)

Brendon's a knight for the costume party. Of course.

Hugh speaking well of Quentin is…a lot. But also OW the blatantly awful things lying BARELY under the surface of what he tells Paddy--and that is the best he has to tell! It's just All Awful! 

Of course, this isn't sustainable either. But give Hugh credit, he has very little practice thinking about other people's emotional welfare. He's trying not to be actively cruel here!!

Ch. 15:

Oh no, baby. :( Progress with Hugh is good but a barrier between him and Brendon is BAD. Unfair to both of them.

Ugggh, ANOTHER unjust adult in his life. Just what Paddy needed.

"Did you enjoy living at Victoria Lodge?" "Why, was I meant to?"

NO

Brendon is his world! And yet he believes Brendon might cut his thumbs off! THIS is why little children are so vulnerable!!

He's HURTING HIMSELF ON PURPOSE to make a chance for Brendon to take care of him. HONEY

Oh the ESSAY. The best thing Miss Prince ever did was send Brendon Paddy's essay.

His mostly-dead relatives are his imaginary friends. I can't believe Paddy actually brought MORE Gothic to Thragoness.

His imaginary dad is just a version of Brendon who approves of him AUGH

He's REENACTING THE RING ABUSE AS A PRETEND Brendon get this child some better occupations

Ch. 16:

No Brendon not like that

…The flipside of the problem is that Brendon ALSO doesn't get that Paddy loves HIM. Because Paddy doesn't TRUST him and Brendon is misdiagnosing the symptoms (and doesn't have confidence he CAN do a decent job with Paddy)

Hugh. Hugh. I GET that you can't cope with Brendon's feelings being hurt either, but it doesn't help to yell at Paddy without actually explaining what he did wrong, and it ESPECIALLY doesn't help when this whole thing is your fault

(Though tbf, Paddy HAS been hiding his problem from Hugh. And Hugh doesn't want to see anything unpleasant unless it's put directly in front of him, so)

Hugh is such a WILD mixture of growing self-knowledge and complete blindness to Paddy. "Not that YOU would know anything about living in dread of discovery, of course"

Ch. 17

Ah yes the WORST POSSIBLE PERSON to catch Paddy. SURE WHY NOT.

All three of the Tenthragon boys are having the WORST DAY IMAGINABLE.

Incredibly impressive, though, what coherent characters both of these brothers are even filtered through Paddy's POV.

Oh Brendon. Buddy. I understand what you're doing, and Hugh literally asked for it because he can't achieve emotional honesty to save his life, but DON'T.

Ch. 18:

Okay, I did not give Brendon enough credit. I mean, I still suspect he doesn't know how MUCH he means to Hugh, but he's putting more even thought into this than I thought.

Paddy loves Hugh too. :( It shouldn't have been his job to learn to understand Hugh, but he has a bit anyway.

He's writing LETTERS to Hugh.

No one is entirely happy and everyone concerned here misses each other and it doesn't CHANGE anything

Oh, the mysterious sister is here?? She's here with her husband???

Auggggh the Snake is HERE.

UGGGGH the sleeper command to "obey Brendon" at the beginning of the book came from HIM? Of course it did. Lifelong expert in frightening children.

Hey. Hey Hugh. Thanks for stealing Paddy when he was a baby.

Ch. 19:

…Oh. Somehow I did NOT place that all the tragic Tenthragon deaths probably weren't accidents.

…Really should've picked up on that.

Oh GOLLY. (Quentin getting legal and financial guardianship over Hugh.)

Hugh telling the whole story in third person because he can't deal with actually TELLING Paddy.

I repeat: even if it wasn't Hugh's intention, the arrangement he put into place ended up being probably the best outcome possible for Paddy.

…I'm sorry, are you telling me that Hugh is STILL NOT A LEGAL ADULT. CURRENTLY.

I knew he was young, but…

That's what you DO miss when POV is filtered through a nine-year-old.

(Brendon might still be in his twenties himself, then. He probably is. OOF he has had WAY too much on his shoulders for WAY too long.)

(He IS in his twenties. He's I think twenty-five?? What an INCREDIBLY good adult he's been.)

Noooo, Brendon, Paddy DOES deserve to know. He's already in the middle of this, he should get to navigate it with some understanding of what he's seen.

Oh, all right, if Hugh didn't want it read then it's fine. Hopefully Paddy can wait a bit to understand his family fully.

Dread.

It ends THERE?

[maylorscardigan]

I love that you’re one of the few people who is 100% sure on them still being together and aren’t fazed about being vocal about that. I’ve noticed on Twitter people are very flip floppy and the Tatty subreddit is filled with pessimism about them. Honestly feel like I’m crazy for how positive and confident I am that they’re still a thing

They remind me of my relationship in every way. Their story feels personal in every way.

I know the hell I went through in my own but we are married now. We got married in March but we only reunited permanently in January. It’s quite the story actually. Spans YEARS just like they do. Some of their history is even similar.

He’s definitely my twin flame and I don’t use that term lightly. At all. It’s because of him I really understood what a twin flame actually is.

Call it What You Want is one of our songs.

I won’t lie - I gasped. Said no no a few times then sobbed. I don’t get emotional over surprise songs. This Love is one of our songs but I was so HAPPY she played that. Especially with Matty there because that just spoke to me. This one really just got to me emotionally.

It’s easy for me to be positive about them because I’ve lived something like it.

I agree that Twitter is very flip floppy. There’s some of that on tumblr as well. The Reddit… ugh. Lol. That’s all I will say.

I’m also a big person with intuition. I never listened to mine before - and I really should’ve LOL but it’s just an intuitive thing. I’ll remain this way until it’s blatantly obvious they’re DONE done. Like someone is married done lmao.

Never feel crazy for it. Enjoy being part of their love story.

[narwhalandchill]

anyway finished the story and. (firefly Heavy (!!!!!!) negativity im basically toxic and venting; overall spoilers)

im just. the ayaka-teppei act they were doing for firefly was way too fucking heavy handed and rushed in delivery to feel anything than hollow and artificial im sorry 💀💀 we knew her for 2h and that shes super sick and sad about it and lied to us from the start and thats warranting the kind of overblown emotional response in the cutscene when shes offed from TB??? yeah its giving delusion factory lmao what a joke

like granted fireflys VA was doing the absolute MOST to sell the act and all the props to her like the performance was excellent but i am. never. going to give a shit about a character whose entire manner of introduction and narrative presence equals to the writers smugly fanning themselves at their so-called genius because of COURSE youll keel over in awe and fawn all over this character uwuwu AND youll like it!!!!! as they gleefully shove it down your throat

like when the fucking LYNCHPIN of an emotional arc presupposes that every single player is absolutely obligated to feel soooo super emotionally attached OwO to the one character thats so blatantly designed to be the most formulaic fucking bait for self inserting and setup for a predictable kick the puppy moment its just..... this isnt it chief ugh i hate it

unironically worst part of the entire TB quest i am. Never going to be the target audience for this shit

like. logically ik part of this is just bc i am just.so vehemently opposed to this trope that i start developing a violent allergic rash the second i smell even the hint of the archetype so i was like. Groaning from the second it became obvious it was going to be another ayaka story quest (which didnt take long). like shes not as offensive as a character as my vitriolic dislike of her archetype suggests but shes easily the weakest aspect of the new story and just subpar writing it suckkssss

like robins death was EASILY vastly more emotionally impactful and shocking bc at least it came out of left field. firefly gets merked and im rolling my eyes bc its just so embarrassing lmao like. was the lesson they took from ayaka that her circumstances werent sad and sympathy baity enough to warrant attachment and thought the solution was to just make hsr ayaka-teppei Super Giga Mega Tragic omgggg. God im tired of this shit

like to be clear im just. such a hater for this trope i dont think its fucking humanely possible to make me like it but i was hoping for firefly to be at least like. Tolerable. let us remain apprehensive and wary throughout and then let those players who get attached to her project those feelings into their experience but NOT presume their existence by default in order for the story to work but. Well. guess they never learned the right lessons eh

im fucking begging her not to play any more significant role going forward i cannot stand it

im sorry firefly you deserved better than this clumsy ass embarrassment of a writing and im sorry ill never be able to like you as a character. your VA was pulling all the stops and your design is visually quite pretty but. it is what it is. im less mad as im just disappointed that it ended up rhe same old formulaic sympathy bait after all.