#like i'm not saying redemption arcs are bad obviously lol

[tyrannuspitch]

tbh i'm glad fandom-at-large's obsession with redemption arcs has mostly died down because on reflection i've never been very into the concept. i'm not opposed but i just tend to find it more interesting to focus on exploring villains' complexities while they're still relatively villainous, or before they became villainous, than to focus on making them stop being villains

[tizeline]

Oh boy, at this point I feel that the truth is gonna chew Mikey hard after discovering they are actually the bad guys. Side note: I know Raph and Mikey are gonna struggle at first to accept the truth and even more to accept that Splinter and April aren't evil… but when and how is gonna Mikey really START to accept this? because I feel theres more chances with Raph than with Mikey

Okay, so this is what I've worked out so far regarding Mikey's redemption arc-

Like in canon, after the season 1 finale and Draxum gets fucked up by The Dark Armor and then also becomes wanted in The Hidden City, he (plus his kids) ends up finding and settling down in that apartment in April's building (the idea of them accidentally becoming April's neighbours is hilarious so I'm keeping that lmao). Then Leo enters his Rebellious Teen Arc and runs off to hang out with Donnie and April most of the time, eventually he's joined by Raph too so then it's mostly just Mikey and Draxum brooding in their apartment all day. It's during this time that Draxum spends some time self-reflecting and eventually decides to abandon their plans of world domination, much to Mikey's dismay who is still very much in the mood to end humanity.

It's hard pinpointing an exact starting point of Mikey realizing that he's been in the wrong, deep down I think he already know this, but he'll be damned if he actually aknowledges it. But it's around this part of the story that things start turning around for Mikey. Because when Draxum announces that it's over and they're done with trying to take over the world, Mikey gets pretty pissed about it and decides that he's ALSO gonna go all Rebellious Teenager on them all! See how they like THAT! BTW Mikey's "Rebellious" Teen Arc mostly includes him spending more time sulking outside than in the apartment as he previously did, and acting a bit more cranky towards Draxum, but he still returns home at a reasonable time in the evening and in general doesn't do anything he isn't allowed to do. He's not very good at being a bad kid haha. (If anything, Draxum thinks it's good that Mikey spends some time outside)

I've mentioned before that I like the idea of introducing Mondo Gecko and Woody Dirkins into the story and that they could help him in his character development and expand his world view (also godammit Mikey needs some friends aside from his brothers) So anyway, it's when Mikey starts spending time outside on his own that he meets and, after some time, befriends both of them. I don't have the details figured out here, but I'm thinking that he first gets to know Mondo considering he's a yōkai/mutant (haven't decided which). Mondo would already be friends with Woody which is how Mikey later meets him, when Mondo introduces them to each other. Mikey is obviously Skeptical at first, but Woody gives him free pizza so Mikey is all like "okay, maybe he sucks slightly less than other humans". All of this is to say, Woody is probably what leads to Mikey actually confronting the fact that he MIGHT be wrong about some things.

It's still very much a gradual change. It's around the end of season 2 that the Draxum family all reconcile with each other, and while Mikey is still not very fond of the Hamatos (especially Donnie lol) or humans, he doesn't wish for their demise anymore. Then it's some time after the events of the movie that Mikey fully commits himself to not judge people merely on them being humans or yōkai.

[archduchessofnowhere]

We talk about portrayals of Sisi, but I think that Franz Joseph was, if anything, even more misrepresented by the recent period dramas. How would you rank the portrayals of him you have seen/read (in historical novels)? Is there any piece of historical fiction that actually captures his character accurately?

Hello! YES I always focus on Elisabeth but he is also completely butchered in all these new series. I think I've said it before, but basically it's very hard to reconcile who FJ actually was (both as an emperor and as a person) with him being a love interest we as an audience can root for. Specially in these new adaptations in which Elisabeth is outspoken, mature and actively politically involved in the events of the empire (and not just the Compromise). Why would our Girl Boss protagonist want to be with a man who was bureaucracy made flesh, very conservative, and just kinda boring in general? It doesn't work. Thus, his personality also gets rewritten.

I don't really have a decided ranking, but off the top of my head I'd say these are my least to most favorite portrayals:

Sisi & Ich (2023): Do you hate Sisi adaptations that turn FJ into a horrible, abusive husband in order to make his wife look good? Well, this portrayal does just that. He is only very briefly in the movie but I hated every minute of it, personally I was mostly fine with the movie despite all its inaccuracies but there was one scene from this part that was a deal breaker for me. This movie should've been just two hours of Irma and Elisabeth traveling and nothing else.

Die Kaiserin (2022-): The solution of the screenwriters to the problem of "how do we make FJ likeable?" Basically turning him into his brother Maximilian lol. You see, he has liberal ideas but his evil mother doesn't let him pursue them! Oh, and he had nothing to do with those executions, that was also his mother! In fact everything bad he ever did was all his mother's fault, because he is not even governing, his mother is. By season 2 it almost seems that FJ has absolutely no idea what's going on in his own empire and needs to be explained basic thing like Italian nationalism. This series sanitizes FJ in levels that just aren't seen in any other adaptation, not even the Sissi Trilogy. You are watching the show and can't help but think "who is this guy???". The only thing he has in common with the real FJ is that he loves his wife, but the way their relationship is portrayed is so unlike the real couple that not even that makes him similar to his historical counterpart.

Sisi (2021-2024). This FJ is in the opposite end of the same spectrum as Die Kaiserin's FJ. Season 1 had the original take of not making FJ likeable, but instead they turned him in a borderline cartoonishly evil, violent and smug man. He smiles as he orders executions, he beats his aids for not reason, he openly cheats on his wife and publicly insults her in a fit of jealousy. Honestly I was baffled by this take, because even after all these bizarre changes they still went for a "Sisi and Franz's great love story!" approach for the series. Which was. A choice. They obviously wanted to make him like that so that he could go through a redemption arc thanks to his relationship with Sisi, but it was just not a well written arc, and when his personality does change in later seasons it doesn't feel like earned character grow but simply that the writers decided to tone down their original approach.

Yet I will admit I'm lowkey fond of this portrayal, I liked most of his storyline in season 2 (he spends most of the season bonding with a feral child and also definitely has a thing going on with Andrássy you can't convince me otherwise), and in season 3 I found myself agreeing with him. So yeah, utterly butchered FJ but in an entertaining way at least.

Sissi Trilogy: I'm honestly overall indifferent to this FJ; he is basically the blueprint for every posterior depiction that portrays him as a Prince Charming love interest. Yet, for all the overomantization of Elisabeth's early life, the movies don't shy away from telling us how FJ was directly responsible of the counter revolution executions. We even see how he is still hated in Hungary and Italy (at least until Sissi comes into the scene). A certain show from a certain straming service could learn that it's not necessary to completely sanitize his image and pin all his faults onto his mother to make Franz Josef into a palatable love interest.

Sisi (2009). I feel about this FJ almost the same as I feel about the Sissi Trilogy's FJ, but in this portrayal we do see more of him than just "Sisi's love interest". Also it's not always all the color of roses, he and Elisabeth disagree and fight more than once. His relationship with his brother Max is also really interesting, pity they only interact in like three scenes. Overall a solid take, if a bit romanticized and not particularly remarkable.

Kronprinz Rudolf (2006). Not a bad take but for what I remember they portrayed Taaffe as having this great influence over FJ and putting him against Rudolf. And like no the evil minister was not responsible for FJ distrusting his son He Was Like That.

Elisabeth das Musical: the only depiction on this list that I truly like, and it really proves that the only way to have a good FJ is to not make him into a love interest. He is only a supporting character and yet the musical nails the most important bits of his personality and his relationship with Elisabeth outstandingly well (loved his wife but never understood her, cheated yet still longed for her, let her go but always hoped she would comeback next to him). There's even room to also show his relationship with Rudolfl! The only thing that I don't really like is that they do portray his mother as having a lot of influence over him, but that's mostly because the musical has an outdated take on Sophie (which works pretty well in a storytelling level nonetheless!). Boote in der Nacht is the saddest song in the entire musical, and the musical is not even about FJ and Elisabeth as a couple. Just a great, nuanced and engaging take!

I know I'm missing a lot FJs but these are the ones that came to my mind right now; I don't think I've ever seen Franz Josef in a piece of media that isn't about Elisabeth or Rudolf. Thank you for your question!

[monstress]

arcane s2 thoughts

prayinggg we get a no soundtrack version because while i do like a few of the tracks (yes even Enemy!!!), there are more duds than hits and they take me out each time

also obviously i'm a Jinx Is Alive truther because of the ending scene of cait staring at the air ducts to the hextech tower fiddling with a fragment of her bomb...come on. jinx has said in the start of the season that she wanted to leave piltover/zaun and with isha gone and her sister happy, she can finally do that

i am very invested in jinx and vi's relationship so when jinx without any hesitation chose to let herself go from vi's grasp and destroy warwick (both something that vi could not do) which in one fell swoop legitimizes her agency, protects vi from a monster, saves vander from eternal hell - i'm like yea...[sniffs] that's a redemption arc baby

jinx and vi. piltover and zaun. they'll always be sisters...yea....

i admire the open ending with the airship. but she did say she'll ride one of those things one day. yay.

maybe an unpopular opinion but i liked cait this season. finally some bite and controversy and trauma to her choices. she was way tooooo comfortable in s1. while she's still a cop, at least she's interesting now!

also ok....yelled and hollered when lesbian sex is finally happening. rejoice guys - i thought we will never get it

the writing pace of this show is bonkers and i understand they need to keep it tight because of animation budget but what the helllllll was that viktor machine herald speedrun. it felt like it needed a good one more season to incubate and i was overwhelmed with that + jayce's heel turn + mel's superpower reveal like hold on hold the fuck onnnnnn what does this meannnnnn

gay sex in hextech void deus ex machina goes crazy tho

like oh yeah i am cosmically tied to only one man in this world and he alone can guide me to the error of my ways in any universe

ok!

mel being the most specialest princess in the entire world seems right imo. i can easily be riled up to sycophantic fervor to serve in her army just say the word ma'am 🫡

let's not forget the tragic irony that Mel was exiled by her mother and has tried to carve her own path through diplomacy and peace in defiance but ends up finding herself sitting in her mother's steel ship in her colors with her army with so much power in her veins and now leaves the city she loved that her mother ruined too. mel merdada one of the characters of all time......

and i am a number one sap so!!!!!!! the flashback scenes this season got me hurting real bad. when i thought i was devastated by Remember Me...here comes s2e7 to punch me in the gut

the fact happiness and normalcy was possible for powder...the fact that powder will never use hexcore because of what happened to vi and it made all the difference. vi's death unknowingly protecting her sister (and the world!) from beyond the grave...i am sobbing my eyes out

also as a season one timebomb shipper, thank youuuu arcane writers i didnt expect this at ALLLLLLLLLL???? it was written like everyone knows they were an item except themselves??? i have done nothing to deserve this but thank you

UPDATE: i hv been informed that they are already dating in the alternative universe from background details. even more delicious

i am just happy to be here and prepared to be devastated

vanderco Real. like don't even waste your breath to say they aren't when they look like they are glowing in domestic bliss. what's some light stabbing and drowning between married couples amirite fellas

claggor and mylo!!!! i didn't expect to get emotional seeing them since idrc but seeing them grown up like ohhhh these are vi and jinx's brothers...and they'll never know this life...okay.....

the alternative timeline pretty much put a bandaid to the pain and suffering for the past 2 seasons and as contrast for more suffering. i love it. the writers are so diabolical

heimerdinger sacrificing himself for ekko is ok for me lol idc abt him goodbye cheesepuff

i still need to process the Ambessa vs MelCait fight. im quite sure there's some great parallels there

but Ambessa as a character is sooooo fascinating. while i hv qualms making a prominently Black character be an imperalist warlord (othering her with her accent too), Ambessa i fear is so so very cool and i was slightly rooting for her ngl like i can't hate a cunning ambitious woman it's against my nature!!!!!

i am gonna think abt mel holding up ambessa like repin's painting of ivan the terrible for a longggg time

side note: i love that sevika finally got what silco wanted all along - a seat at the (council)table. like that's my wifeeeeeee. lib ending i know i know since the best ending is a free state of zaun but like narrative wise it would notttt make sense at the point of time. but also since they never confirmed anything, i wanna say they'll have a go at dismantling the power structure that is oppressing zaun with sevika keeping an eye on it. not a perfect solution but i'll take it rather than leave it

so will i watch another show on LoL?

mmmm.......anyways guys watch Penelope of Sparta!

[iamnmbr3]

I was reading the wiki page on Occlumency for a fic and now I'm even more confused why JKR thinks Draco can't be redeemed (or whatever she's said on it, I don't care too much for her words).

She literally acknowledges in a quote that Draco is so good at Occlumency because he can compartmentalise his feelings well, and gave as an example that he's such a 'good' bully (good is kind of contested because I really don't think he was that good lol) because he can suppress the pity he feels. Like, she basically says that he does feel bad for (some) of the things he did (or at least has the capacity to), and he just forces it down. I'd imagine an actually 'good' bully wouldn't even feel pity to begin with.

She also says he shut down his compassion to be a good DE, which really just sounds like he tried to shut it down and failed in the end, because he's awful at being actually cruel and doing things the other DEs do. And overall, most people don't hold out for very long when they're actively suppressing or shutting down emotions, and I honestly think it's very possible that Draco struggled more and more with that near the end of the War until it all fell apart at some point.

Of course, this is all just post-books quotes, and fuck JKR, but it's so interesting that she acknowledges that he can (and maybe actively does) feel pity and compassion, which would be such a good set up for a redemption arc imo!

I'm mostly asking this here because your analyses are amazing and you're by far my favourite drarry blog (even though this is only Draco, oops), but I'm curious what you think of this since I don't think you've said anything on this yet (correct me if I'm wrong lol, I could be).

yeah exactly. (for those who don't know - on wizarding world there's this whole long incredibly pretentious and condescending essay that she wrote about how draco didn't get a redemption arc and fans better not like him or else which is hugely contradictory and literally describes how he got a redemption arc - and drops some cool additional lore that makes him even more interesting and complicated - all while trying to get fans not to care. it's wild.) a while ago i started a meta breaking it down but I never got around to finishing it. I really should dig it up.

and yeah I think that whole essay provides great additional backstory that adds depth and interest to draco's character (love the bit about him keeping dark arts relics in a glass cabinet as a reminder - to look at and never use) and is literally the opposite of what jkr wants it to be. she literally describes how he had doubts and had to suppress parts of himself to go along with something he knew was wrong (something that bellatrix or even lucius very obviously didn't have to do) and how ultimately his morals won out, he spent the rest of his life regretting his actions, and fought with his family in order to raise his son with different values. I.e. he CHANGED HIS MIND AND HIS ACTIONS...aka a redemption arc.

the essay is great till jkr concludes with 'so this is why draco is irredeemably evil and fans shouldn't like him'. um ??? the??? why didn't u write him that way???? her lack of self awareness is bizarre.

[bigskydreaming]

My TW fandom experience:

*Everyone watches the exact same episode where Scott McCall says what if we dont kill people tho and after much deliberation, its agreed lets not kill people this episode and this is the only reason most former villains and fan favorites stick around and become the pack's new besties instead of being written out of the show due to the pack's initially proposed solution of Ready Set Murder*

Most of fandom: Well that was terrible. He's literally the worst. They should've just killed the villains, problem solved, why is he so dumb. Inquiring minds want to know.

Also most of fandom:

*writes fics where nobody cares what Scott says or thinks because they all agree, he's literally the worst, so dumb, why is he even here*

*fics remain mysteriously populated by all the characters everyone says the mains should absolutely have murdered to fix all their problems and the only reason they didnt in canon is Scott insidiously mind-controlled his friends into non-homicidal compliance*

Scott fans: .....hang on. I'm confused.

Most of fandom: What's confusing dumbass, literally why would they kill the villains that are hot and white and shippable instead of just making friends with them so that sometimes they can get married and have kids? Its called letting people change and grow, even mass murderers deserve redemption arcs. Also I dont know if you know this but murder is bad, plz read more books. LOL why are Scott fans like this.

Scott fans: Wait. But didn't all the characters want to murder that villain you made the central character and one half of the hero pair of 70% of the fics written last season? So who said what if we dont kill people tho and got everyone to change their votes from Ready Set Murder to Redemption Arc Marriage and then maybe babies?

Most of fandom: Umm, Stiles? Obviously. LMAO. Do you even watch the show?

Scott fans: Okay, but Stiles was the one who pitched Ready Set Murder. It was his plan. So who was like what if we dont kill people to Stiles, so that then he said wait guys lets not kill people?

Most of fandom: Oh that was Peter. They have a special bond. He gets him.

Scott fans: Right. So did Peter sell Stiles on the whole lets not kill people thing before he killed his niece and then like ten other people? Or was it after that.

Most of fandom: Before. No! Wait. After! Yeah, it was after that.

Scott fans: Got it. So who said what if we dont kill people to Peter to get him to agree lets not kill people which he definitely did since he definitely did not continue to kill people all the way to the end of the show?

Most of fandom: .....Deucali....

Scott fans: *squint one eye*

Most of fandom: .....heo....?

Scott fans: *squint both eyes*

Most of fandom: Derek! Right, yeah. Derek, it was definitely Derek.

Scott fans: Oh okay. Derek said lets not kill people to Peter. I'm assuming after he killed Peter, since I mean, it wouldn't make much sense for him to be all hey what if we dont kill people to Peter and then literally kill Peter haha. We can at least agree on that much, right?

Most of fandom: I don't know that we can, actually.

Scott fans: Well, let's just say that it was after he killed Peter and thus after Peter came back. Which does make sense, I guess, I mean, at least that was also after he gave his pack the Go Kill Lydia assignment for their werewolf homework....

Most of fandom: Whoa, whoa, hold up. That has nothing to do with any of this. It was a totally different situation because Derek didnt WANT to kill Lydia, he HAD to kill Lydia. She was turning into an evil murder lizard, what was he supposed to do?

Scott fans: She quite literally was not.

Most of fandom: Okay but see he THOUGHT she was, which is basically the same thing.

Scott fans: Is it tho?

Most of fandom: Yes. Look, he was like, 60% sure it was her and that's over half sure so that's a reasonable conclusion to make at that point. Anyone would have made that mistake.

Scott fans: Except for Scott. Because he's so much dumber than everyone else.

Most of fandom: Yes! Exactly.

Scott fans: So when Scott said what if we dont kill people to Derek, and stopped him and his pack from killing Lydia, because murder is bad and Derek even agrees, its not like he WANTED to kill Lydia, he just HAD to kill Lydia because she was probably an evil murder lizard and what else was he gonna do.....Scott only said and did that because he was too dumb to come to the conclusion everyone smarter than him would reasonably come to....which was that Lydia had to die, even though murder is bad and she was maybe potentially not even technically an evil murder lizard?

Most of fandom: Right. So it doesnt count.

Scott fans: But it was good that he stopped them from killing Lydia though, right? Cuz everyone likes Lydia, and also, she wasnt actually the evil murder lizard, that was Jackson, and also, they turned out to not actually need to kill Jackson to stop him from being the evil murder lizard?

Most of fandom: ....yes but no. Like yes to all of that, but he was still wrong, is the point. So no.

Scott fans: So -

Most of fandom: Look I dont think you're getting it?! OMG, okay. I don't know if I can dumb it down any further, but lemme give it one last shot. 1) Murder is bad. 2) Even hot white villains deserve redemption arcs. 3) And Scott is terrible. There. Its really that simple lol.

Scott fans: Okay. So everyone deserves redemption. Any character can be better if the other characters give them a chance. Even mass murderers.

Most of fandom: Right.

Scott fans: But Scott is irredeemable. There's nothing that can make him any better so other characters shouldn't even bother giving him a chance. Because he's terrible.

Most of fandom: Also correct.

Scott fans: Because he's always saying murder is bad and what if we dont kill people tho.

Most of fandom: YES. Finally. Now you're getting it. Honestly, what was so hard about that.

[dross-the-fish]

First of all I just really want to say I absolutely LOVE your art and specially the way you draw Erik, Leroux-Erik my beloved 😭💕

Ok ANYWAY. I saw your posts discussing about Erik and how the Phandom portray him and Raou, and I really want to point out some of my views (in the healthiest and most polite way possible!!!)

I'm not trying to deny Erik's flaws nor that I have an obvious bias since he's my favorite character ever AAAND Raoul is a character I dislike a LOT for multiple reasons lol but, I want to adress that: Erik is a person that endured multiple ways of abuse and humiliation in his life, since he was a child. He has multiple scenes of trauma response and, as you pointed out your post, acts impulsively many times and also shows clear remorse for his actions. What I think separates him from Raoul is (aside from the obvious class diference and the fact that Erik has a whole history of trauma and evidences of mental illness) the fact that Erik learns something from his selfish, self-destructive behaviour. He *had* a chance to end up with Christine if he didn't so shitty with her, and this is very impactful in the end specially because Leroux didn't treat him as a villain who deserved punishment, but as a traumatized AND completely abandoned person who fucked up pretty bad

Obviously, despite my personal beef with Raoul, I don't think he's some sort of abusive devil or any shit like that. I just think Christine would be better at her own. Forgetting Erik's flaws for a minute — Raoul *is* very manipulative, childish and uncaring towards Christine. He, unlike Erik, doesn't learn from his mistakes and presents the same behavior until the end of the story. Idk my girl Christine could be better at her own, single, following her career. The fact that Raoul was born in a rich family in the 19th century and didn't face any of the poberty or struggles that lower-classed people like Daroga, Erik and Christine had also make his character waaaay more difficult to like in my point of view. I'm NOT SAYING THAT "being rich makes you evil" (duh) nor that Erik's actions are ok, just to be clear! It just bothers me how so many people treat Raoul like a saint little puppy and Erik as a monster, like COME ON

Now, back to Erik: I'm not saying you intended to mean that, but I have a huge problem with how part of the Phandom thinks Erik had malicious intentions when approaching Christine, or that his feelings for her are fake. The "Erik knew precisely what he was doing since the start" really makes sense considering how his redemption arc went in the novel. Obviously this changes a lot in many adaptations (for example he's clearly much more self-aware and manipulative in the musical). But Leroux-Erik *genuinely* believed he was doing the right thing. Maybe he had an idea of "uuuugh maybe this is pretty bad maybe i should stop" but the self-destructive-fear-of-abandoment-everything-is-fine voice spoke louder. Let's not forget that what turned Erik into having such a violent mental breakdown was not "Christine doesn't love me and I must punish her" bullshit, it was when he heard her speaking not so many cool things about him and his appearance at his back (NOT BLAMING OR HATING HER, I love Christine, I'm talking about Erik's pov). If Erik didn't love Christine, or if he was a monster, he wouldn't feel any guilty for his actions. The most impactful thing in the ending of POTO is that Erik realized he had treated the woman he loved like trash and even still she showed him the compassion he needed

Ok ending this long ass text, I just wanted to state that I agree with a lot of your points specially how the Phandom tends to summarize everything to black and white even though most of the characters are all morally grey. I wanted people to stop dehumanizing a mentally ill abuse survivor like Erik while also stop hating on a poor woman who never asked to be put into Raoul's or Erik's bullshit lol thanks for having the patience to read, I'm really curious to know what your thoughts about this are 💕💕💕

I appreciate your courtesy, I understand where you are coming from but there are a few points i'm not sure I fully agree with. While it is fair to depict Erik as traumatized or mentally ill, I feel these are ultimately reasons for his behavior, not justifications. I agree that he is a sympathetic character and his story is a tragic one, I also agree that Erik had a great capacity for good under better circumstances. Leroux says "he had a heart that could hold empires but had to content himself with a cellar," or something to that effect and I believe that's true. But some of Erik's behavior cannot be written off as impulse or trauma response. He was still an assassin who built torture chambers and even when no longer in Persia he still had a torture chamber in his home that he made use of. He has enough agency that he can still be held responsible for all of the death and destruction he caused even as we acknowledge that he doesn't enjoy killing and feels remorse. How he deals with his remorse in particular is a bit of a sticking point for me. Erik's consistent ability to willfully "forget" what he does or completely deny the severity of his crimes is very likely a product of guilt but the presence of guilt is not a sign of virtue and after awhile it starts to feel like he is first and foremost dodging accountability. He never feels guilty enough to stop and prefers instead to alleviate his internal discomfort by emotionally distance himself from his actions. I also think it's important to acknowledge that Erik is a villainous character and he is violent with Christine. He does try terrorize her and coerce her into marrying him by threatening to kill her and everyone else. To be honest that's why I like his redemption, because he actually NEEDS to be redeemed. You can't redeem a character that never fell from grace. If we can't hold him accountable for his choices and acknowledge the full harm he did then his redemption is hollow. On the subject of Raoul, Leroux tends to write him as being kind of young and stupid and most of his boorish behavior the product of youthful impulse and the older I get the more I'm inclined to agree. This doesn't make Raoul right or even necessarily likeable but if we're giving Erik grace based on the author's sentiments towards the character we should probably give some to Raoul as well. Ultimately I feel Raoul redeems himself by proving he's willing to die for Christine. He throws himself into mortal peril to save her because he does love her. Yes, he has a lot of privilege compared to other characters and it certainly contributes to him coming off spoiled and bratty at times but at the end of the day he and Christine do love each other and he is who she chose. I'll admit I sometimes feel compelled to defend Raoul even if he's not remotely close to my favorite character just because the fandom tends to over inflate his flaws and hold him to the worst faith interpretation while making every excuse under the sun for Erik. The phandom will go to great lengths to see nuance and humanity in Erik's behavior but not in Raoul's and, while I have my own character preferences and Erik is certainly my favorite by a long shot, I try to be fair and empathetic to ALL the characters in the story, whether I actually like them or not.

[pyjamaart]

I never needed such help / This is my SOS

(Content warning: self harm) (If you don't have a problem with that, huge Drillman essay under the read more lol)

When I said that I wanted to draw Drillman some more, this really wasn't what I had in mind.

This week, I've been shopping for music on various second hand sites, which made me realize I don't physically own one of my all time favorite albums: "Squaring The Circle" by Sneaker Pimps. I had to change that immediately. (As well as buying like 15 other CDs and vinyls, lol.) As I was listening to it once again, I realized just how much the song "SOS" reminded me of Drillman and his struggles.

If you don't want to look it up, here are some of the lyrics:

"I look much smaller seen from inside out/Far too small to see myself/Down on reflection, cast in hate and in doubt/Flawed and flaws I add myself"

"Oh mirror mirror hanging on the wall/Please just show me someone else/My hopes were low and I got so much so less/Nothing left to save myself"

Listen, this dude got some major problems with his self esteem. He feels like an embarrassment because he was forced into a life he never wanted by his father. Now he seeks revenge on the company that bought his families business, along with him and apparently his bodily autonomy. Think about that for a minute. How fucked would it be if your parents wanted you to be a doctor, but a requirement for that would be to have your hand surgically removed and replaced with a scalpel. That's the exact situation Drillman found himself in.

Now a lot of people probably think "Well why doesn't he just ask Dr. Light to give him a new pair of hands then, if he's this miserable?" This is where we get to one of Drillmans biggest problems: the refusal to ask for help in any way. And even after the finale of the season, why would he go to the Lights for help in the first place? Wasn't it Aki who thought the best way to help him through his problems was hypnotism? And in the process embarrassing him in front of the whole city, ruining the last bit of reputation he may have had? (For real though, that episode is so hard for me to watch. I just feel so so bad for him, since I really struggle with social anxiety myself.)

As the guys from the Youtube channel "The D-Pad" (who reviewed all of the MMFC episodes) fittingly commented: "This would be like fucking Vietnam for him." And they were right. Obviously, Drillman is horrified that Aki would humiliate him like this and lashes out, solidifying his opinion that asking for help is a bad idea.

In that episode, there's this one moment that really stuck with me. At around the 8 minute mark, while Drillman is having a breakdown over the terrible "music" Aki made him perform, there's this one shot where he takes a moment to look at the drills that replaced his hands in frustration. The camera perspective makes it seem as if we are experiencing this brief scene through his eyes. It's actually quite upsetting. (A link to the moment I'm talking about: youtu.be/OC_jdhoeTrE?si=ZPzAXu…)

This is also a perfect moment for me to gush over the voice acting for this scene. Andrew McNee did such a fantastic job of conveying Drillmans distress and anger through his voice. That reminds me, giving him a British accent was honestly such a good decision.

The reason he doesn't talk at all throughout most of his first appearance is probably because the writers wanted to surprise their audience a little. As in, you see this big, imposing construction robot and think "Oh man, what a brute. He probably has a pretty deep voice." And then he actually starts to speak and it's this sophisticated, well-articulated British voice instead. Quite the whiplash.

To get back to the original topic, I'm honestly still upset that they didn't give Drillman a redemption arc at the end of the show. This probably would have happened in season 2, as Mega Man even says at some point "I know deep down your inner bits are good", proving to me that the writers definitely had something in mind regarding Drillmans character arc.

And now that all of that is out of the way, we can finally get into headcanon territory.

You might have seen this image while browsing the tags and asked yourself, "Why is this Mega Man Fully Charged artwork littered with content warnings?" And well, now that you're here and reading this, you probably know why. I can't say I've ever made myself sick with a drawing before. That's a first for me.

My headcanon is, that after the finale of the show, Drillman is just utterly lost. Lord Obsidian, who sought him out specifically because he knew of Drillmans problems and offered him a place to stay and a way to get revenge on the people he thought responsible for his predicament, turned out to be a horribly racist human who was just using him to achieve his own devious goals. After getting his ass kicked by the Lights, the same people who had not only humiliated him in front of the whole city, but who had also left him stuck to his abusive father for an entire day (I bet that ride to the police station was horrible for all the people involved, most of all the police bots who had to hear the Drillmen yell at each other the whole time), Sgt. Night is detained by the police. We don't actually see what happens after that, because that's where the show ends.

I'd like to think that the Lights actually try to talk to the robot masters once everything is over, telling them all the horrible things their so-called "leader" has said and done. And most importantly, what he thinks of robots: That they're nothing but tools to him. That once they had gotten him his Mega key, he would have wiped their minds and turned them into mindless machines.  

I'm guessing none of the robot masters would take these news well, but most of all Drillman. I think that after he ran away from Skyraisers Inc. and fought Mega Man for the first time, he was really relieved to have some place to stay and a new goal, maybe even a robot to look up to. That being Lord Obsidian of course. Who knows what lies he told Drillman and the others? Kinda sad that we never really got to see what the robot masters who stayed with Lord Obsidian did the entire day. When they weren't causing havoc in the city, that is.

None of them seemed really friendly with each other in the finale, now that I think about it. I guess "Obsidians robot sanctuary" wasn't really a great place to stay at after all. But still better than being homeless, like that one maniac living in the forest all by himself. Speaking of Woodman, in my AU, he and Drillman already knew each other at this point. This also reminds me of something I forgot to mention in my last post. While I'd love to see them interact in any way, because they're both my favorite characters, I don't ship them in any way whatsoever. I'd also like to think that Woodman and Drillmans father were schoolmates back in the day, maybe even friends? (I'm still holding onto those 30 years).

Anyway, after all the former robot comrades part ways, now without a leader, what was Drillman supposed to do? Once again betrayed by a trusted figure, feeling useless and without purpose, still with these stupid drills mounted to his body... Still too ashamed to ask for help. After all that has happened in the past few hours he begins spiraling, which ultimately leads him to make a very unfortunate decision. Trying to get at least some of the freedom in his life back, he attempts to get rid of the drills making up his body on his own, using the same tools that have haunted him all this time to finally rid himself of this burden.

He regrets this just seconds after, when he's left with an unresponsive limb, metal and wires exposed and oil splattered all over his orange plating. All he can do is stare at the stained drill in front of him in horror.

"I never needed such help/This is my SOS"

Jesus Christ that got dark. Sorry. I mentioned in my last post that Drillman possibly has really bad body dysmorphia, which I'm also trying to convey here. Don't worry, he really gets his hands back after this. Maybe the Lights find him after that and the good Doctor offers to fix him up. By which I mean not only his arm. Because apparently, Dr. Light also doubles as robot psychologist. I just really need Drillman to get his happy ending. He really really deserves it after everything he had to go trough over the course of the show. 

I also need him to have a DJing redemption, besides the normal redemption. I've seen people headcanon that he exclusively likes classical music, but I personally don't believe that. He'd be the kind of music nerd who would say stuff like "I listen to everything" and then you look at his playlists and he actually listens to everything. Maybe not experimental noise rock, though. I can just imagine Aki and Suna helping him put on an actual show, this time without any hypnotizing bullshit, as a way for Aki to apologize for the dread he's caused Drillman during that incident. Drillman would be highly suspicious at first, but actually goes along with it in the end. Maybe they'd also take Fireman along, who Dr. Light also blessed with a brand new pair of hands. The punchline at the end would be that Drillman would have so much anxiety about embarrassing himself again, that he forgets to make an actual set list for the gig. In the end, he exclusively plays Lady Gaga songs, which no one complains about.

Alright then, enough yapping from me. I've really been writing this essay since 8pm. And now it's 2am. My god. I just have a lot of feelings about Drillman.

But now I really gotta go to bed. Stay safe peeps. I hope you actually read the content warnings. Jenny out.

[lillified]

Oh!! Btw! I'm a drag artist and I'm doing a drag cosplay of starscream for pride and tfnation 2023 and sometimes when I question if the look is too fem or cutesy shaped, I think about your starscream and I remind myself that I'm serving cunt actually. Thank you for your service

hi!! I absolutely love both of the asks you sent but I hope you don’t mind me responding to this one with a little bit of personal musing—specifically about Starscream and femininity, lol. (long post warning!!)

I cannot stress enough how generally positive and supportive reception to my changes has been, especially in the case of Starscream—that being said, I do think about the occasional pushback I get every so often, and how it feeds into why I make the choices I do

starscream has always been a feminine character, which I think is part of why a lot of people are drawn to it in the first place—even talking to older fans, who grew up with the original show, there seems to be this implicit understanding that Starscream is something “other” (“pretty poison” as a beta name should tell you quite a bit). this is something that has remained relatively consistent in the entirety of transformers—albeit in, I’d argue, the worst way possible.

there are a lot of character decisions I dislike on a thematic level that vary across continuity, but one extremely reliable element of any Starscream is the way femininity defines their villainy. you’re never supposed to like the “feminine” traits. they’re played for jokes and comically exaggerated at best; at worst, any and all Starscream redemption arcs are completely dependent on grappling with emasculation, and shedding the feminine. Even in continuities where other characters (a whole other ballpark) are murderous, abusive, and violent, Starscream is canonically regarded as morally lesser, specifically because their villainy manifests in the feminine. masculine, “active” displays of malice are more noble and admirable than the “passive” and “feminine” act of quiet scheming and deception.

I’m not saying that Starscream doesn’t do bad things, obviously, but this is such a constant theme that it has thoroughly leeched its way into fan spaces as well. I’m not really active in fan communities anymore, but I will always feel frustrated with how the character’s femininity is simultaneously misunderstood and exploited, because that is the natural reaction to femininity. it is inoffensive and clean and neat, and it fits into one of very few digestible archetypes, because it is not perceived as a natural form of expression, but an other. it is only allowed when it is attractive and easy to understand.

this is something that extends to women, as, obviously, in a performative binary womanhood is a shorthand for femininity. “woman” is an other, and feminine women exist in palatable, digestible archetypes. even with all the progress we have made it is really not common to see women or feminine characters in general treated with equal respect or interest, and, the more you pay attention, the more you’ll notice a total apathy for their feelings, struggles, and complexity.

I know this is all really dense, but I bring that all up to say that there is a reason I want to spotlight and elaborate on Starscream’s femininity. it’s a trait that is inherent to the character, but I’d argue that there hasn’t ever really been a moment where that femininity ever manifests as something positive. it’s a derogatory label, but never something the character owns.

I want to see a Starscream that is confidently feminine and “cutesy” because the character has never been afforded that luxury! moreover, I want to portray a fully femme Starscream because there is no reason that should change the character’s complexity or their queer association! (I once saw the argument that making Starscream a girl would be “erasing the character’s queer history” and that kind of sums up the casual effect of misogyny in these weird online spaces, lol. granted that doesn’t mean you can’t project or imagine any gender identity you want for the character—I think that’s very good, actually!!) even though I have never personally been a feminine person, I’ve always been really attached to Starscream’s femininity and the idea of a femme-presenting version because there was a sorely lacking character type I desperately wanted to see—a messy, bitter, and by all means “evil” person who was also feminine, without those things being linked via cause and effect. I hope that makes sense?? essentially, a very feminine girl whose femininity wasn’t the implicit or explicit cause of their moral failings, and was instead treated as. yknow, a neutral mode of expression

anyway, I am very sorry for saying so many words about something pretty trivial here. if you couldn’t tell transformers was the thing that first got me thinking about gender and themes and media critique as a child, so i have feelings like this, lol. none of the problems I listed here are ultimately all that serious and they certainly aren’t exclusive to the robots, but it’s something I really wanted to talk about!

TL;DR: Starscream’s gender is what you make of it and i think you shouldnt stop yourself because it is accurate to the character, actually! I hope that I can encourage people to think outside the box of what rigidly exists in writing and expand their horizons to what the art is trying to say, and how your experience is important :)

sorry again for the long post jeez!!

[joltai-showa]

fic notes, From Queen to a Pawn, chapter 8 edition!

I dunno where did the entire day go lmao, I swear to god I blinked and it was already middle of the night, but I did went to check out a major research innovation laboratories cluster which was pretty fun, really fascinating what is being developed for prosthetics field. Couldn't join the work dinner with the others cuz I wanted to decorate my flat for New Year + had to cook some stuff before it all went bad, which is where my evening magically vanished lol. The tree did come out pretty cute, so I'm pretty satisfied.

Anyway, yapping about life stuff is over, let's get back to your guys' favorite yapping topic: Obito's suffering😘

(yes that's what he looks like in "Eclipse" ahaha)

- chapter's title: obviously, "Eclipse" refers to a natural phenomena that occurs whenever the moon blocks the sun's light from the Earth's point of view by being directly in the way between the sun and the planet

- and by this point I think it should be pretty obvious that this chapter is explicitly tied to the name of the entire series: "Body and Soul, Sun and Moon"

- I have seen certain interpretations of this title as Deidara being the Sun and Obito being the Moon, however, as you might have guessed, this is incorrect. "Body and Soul" is the part that refers to Obito. Maybe one day I'll write down exactly why is that in greater detail, but for now the only thing that is important is: Obito's trauma regarding losing half of his body, looking like a chewtoy for a bobcat, the reality being hell, him physically being stuck in it, while what he really wants and dreams of is the illusion. I don't think that I currently do a very good job of working the with whole "Soul" thing at this point in the series, mostly because "Mind" is more appropriate rn. Oh well

- but back to "Sun and Moon": yes, Deidara is indeed the Sun in the title, but the Moon refers to none other than Rin. No matter how passionately I hate canonic Obirin, one can not attempt to write Obito inside the canon universe without his love/obsession with Rin

- Kishimoto really managed to outdo himself with these two, because not only is Rin not a character (a cardboard cutout has a more consistent character traits than whatever the fuck she is), but also managed to make Obito both a terrible human being and a character. And these are two different things on Kishimoto's part: obviously, being the leader of Akatsuki and the mastermind behind like 80% of the shit going down in modern Naruto history, adult Obito that we meet in the story is an abhorrent man that is directly and indirectly responsible for countless horrific crimes and no amount of flashbacks to "uwu cutie patootie boi who dreamet of bekoming a hOkAgi❤️❤️❤️❤️" can ever excuse and explain that piece of dogshit that was supposed to be his "redemption arc". Seriously, the only thing that this man makes me feel in canon whenever I see him getting fucked over during the finale of Fourth Shinobi World War is "awww, you're having a bad day?🥺 I hope it gets worse!😊🙏 I hope you'll suffer far more than all of your victims combined🥳🥳"

- but that obviously only touches on Obito as a man, not as a character, and, surprisingly, even after giving him a full-blown flashback stretch of several chapters, him being the main villain for the series for like 250 (?) chapters out of the total 700 and getting "redemption arc"... Kishimoto still did not manage to produce anything coherent or even decent. I still wanna write down an extensive post regarding all of the issues canon Obito has, but for now I'll just say that he as a character is just terrible, mostly because his motivations are so fucking bad. Kishimoto didn't want to bother giving him anything beyond "I feel nothing"/"World is hell" + he literally phisycally couldn't as anything darker than the Rin death scene massacre would raise serious questions from the readers about why THE FUCK is this guy of all assholes is getting such a lazy "redemption arc", so at the end of the day Obito's motivations fall onto 2848927484 phrases on the level of iam14andthisisdeep about the state of the world and his love for a character whose defining feature in the plot is being Obito's love intrest🙂awesome stuff Kishi

- anyway, as I've mentioned here and there, as far as BSSM au is concerned, I will be changing both Obito's and Rin's characters. With Obito it's kinda already there and just me doing what I believe to be realistic about a man as bitter and traumatised as him. Also getting rid of the whole "I feel nothing" thing, because this is just Kishi's lazy writing to not deal with any of the things concerning Obito's relations with other people from that 17 YEARS LONG PERIOD OF HIS LIFE, so he's just gonna be yapping about feeling nothing, which is exactly what he wants to be (of his own volition + what Madara and Zetsus want of him). Rin being dead is a bit harder to show (LMAO), but I have some stuff in mind to give some meat to the skeleton of this character, so to speak.

- Rin and Girldara are two of Obito's crushes and, in a sense, roads with different outcomes. In the beginning (which is where we are now) they are also desires of Obito's soul and Obito's body respectively. I'm planning on having him excuse his attraction to his Akatsuki partner as "it's just physical urges, it doesn't matter, she's just something from this world, all of this belongs to this world, and it'll all be gone when the ideal world comes"

- Rin, in my opinion, has a lot of imagery assosiated with the moon as far as canon concerned. Not only does she die under the full moon, she is also Obito's ultimate goal at the end of this wonderful thing called "Eye of the Moon". I believe that even the 14 opening (Tsuki no Ookisa) of Shippuden directly shows her dead body's connection to the full moon. So, making her the "Moon" in the title was pretty obvious move.

- Deidara, on the other hand, is just a little sun bunny😙that's simply off the way she looks: lively, loud, hair bright as sunlight (regardless of the horrors of her past and current life💀). I wasn't planning on getting rid of the whole Rin thing, so it was pretty natural to kind of put them on the opposite sides as Sun and Moon

- also I find it incredibly funny that the name of the organization that both Deidara and Obito belong to is the... "Dawn" (yes, that's the translation of "Akatsuki" as it is written in the manga. The sounds in the word can be separated into "Aka Tsuki" which means "Red Moon", but this is moreso a coincidence and a pun on Kishimoto's part). Which is. You know. When the time rolls over from the night with the moon and onto the day with the sun😁

- anyway ENOUGH YAPPING ABOUT THE TITLE GODDAMMIT. and yes "Eclipse" refers to that scene when Obito starts seeing Rin as he holds passed out Deidara, as the Moon kind of got in the way of the Sun

- "Gritting his teeth tighter, Obito repeatedly attempts to locate Zetsu, no doubt in his mind regarding the thing's intentions."

The entire first half (?) of the chapter Obito is trying to find Zetsu spying on them... and Zetsu isn't even present😁😁😁😁 Yes, as the omnipotent entity of the writer as I am, I confirm right now that no cacti or weird shadows of a miserable Uchiha man followed our livebirds in this chapter. Obito's paranoia regarding that will be adressed in later chapters, maybe even in the next one, but he is playing a carefully for no one, because Zetsu isn't there and Deidara has bigger issues on her mind

- that doesn't mean that Zetsus didn't have a plan in motion for these events🤭it's just that they didn't need to be present and risk being discovered to get a confirmation of their suspictions😁😁😁😁again, stuff for later chapters

- oh and one last thing about Zetsu before we continue with the chapter: I've already been dropping mentions of Deidara's left arm festering back in chapters 6 and 7

from "Dead or a lie":

from "Unexpected discoveries":

now as for whether Zetsu knew that it wasn't Deidara's severed right arm on the ground that was rotting, but rather her left elbow is an open-ended question😁

- and yeah regarding her wounds: in the manga Deidara kind of immediately loses everything below his upper arm, meaning no hand and elbow

(chapter 249)

I slightly changed her wounds in the fic to accomodate the... necessity for something to get amputated🙂 so in FQTP Deidara loses only her hand, the elbow rots away due to infection, and in the end she ends up with the same scars as her canon counterpart, meaning Kakuzu's threads going midway through her upper arm

- and yeah Kishi you wanna explain why the fuck Deidara just doesn't fucking die in the beginning of Shippuden? jesus fucking christ, got his arm crushed by Gaara's sand (pretty sure not sterile), whatever the fuck remained was hanging there with the remains of the cloak (surely not sterile), then he yoinks Gaara from the village, walks on foot from Suna to the hideout in another fucking country (????WHY WON'T YOU FLY DUMBASS), seals Shukaku for THREE FUCKING DAYS before yoinking Gaara again and fighting Konoha, but now with NO ARMS at all. A ninjutsu specialist and a ranged fighter btw. And then he goes on a stroll around the forest looking for his arm. WHAT IS ACTUALLY WRONG WITH YOU???? CAN YOU CHILL FOR FIVE FUCKING SECONDS???? OMFG DUDE'LL HAVE A NUKE DROPPED ON HIS HEAD AND SURVIVE AT THIS POINT

- ahem. so. yeah. Deidara almost dying from infection? my attempt at trying to tone down that black air force energy that Kishi created for this character in the Kazekage Rescue arc, because some things are simply too absurd

- I posted about this on here about certain research I was conducting for this chapter and yeah that was about Deidara's condition. What has happened to her left arm is commonly known as wet gangrene and myiasis (that's the scientific name for getting maggots😘😘😘😘😘). Surprisingly there's actually maggot therapy for different gangrenic wounds because the larva of certain species of flies will actually eat only the dead tissue, leaving the living tissue unaffected. That still involves putting maggots in your wounds though

- really don't recommend googling either of these conditions unless you want to see people with blackened parts of bodies and tiny white insect larvae inside someone's wound🙂

- anyway the gangrene stuff has been planned in advance, but I was not sure about the maggot part, so I checked and yes, the most common way to get it is to have an open wound in some very hot and humid climate. I'm too lazy to pull the Naruto World map for this post, so you'll need to open the pinned post on this blog if you don't know the general stuff about it, but based of the most extreme climatic points for it (with something like Land of Snow in the north and Land of Wind with its desert in the south), I think it's fair to interpret Naruto world as somewhat Northern Hemisphere situated? if that makes sense. meaning that Land of Rivers being next to Land of Wind is pretty hot and humid (there's literally a long ass river in canon by Akatsuki's hideout + also Deidara sits in some fucking cave for 3 days straight), sooooo... yeah, who would have seen this coming *gasp*

- and one last funny fact about my life: so I posted this chapter on Friday, and following Tuesday I had my regular Chinese classes, and our study group has like an absolutely insane range of girls from different profession, because somehow we've got me the data scientist, a girl who is currently studying back at uni that I just finished, but for something like a business degree, a lawyer girl, a girl working in agriculture and a nuclear engineer of all people, but most importantly a girl who is studying to be a doctor and already works as a nurse (which translates to "she is the same age as me but to get her degree she has to study like another 5 more years"). And as usual midway through the Chinese class we start chatting about normal girl things like SEWING BACK SEVERED LIMBS. And she actually said that the limit for a severed arm to be reattached is just 6 hours, after this it is considered infected and dead

- for reference I believe I've set the time between Deidara and her right arm's departure to be about 24 hours lmao. so realistically she should not be getting this arm back either. but realistically she should have also died from shock back in Suna, so some of the realism is thrown out of the window to accomodate Naruto world's batshit crazy stuff. let's just say her right arm is alright thanks to some weird DNA changes thanks to being an active chakra user and a descendant of a major shinobi clan😁I mean the arm was lying there for just a day, it's not as bad a walking around an open wound for almost a week🙂

- also I was pretty spot on with most of Deidara's symptomps even before finishing the research, except for one thing and that is pain actually going away after the infection kills the nerves in the limb. so in the released chapter she doesn't feel anything in it (and now it's just the rest of her body screaming in pain because low on chakra + got beaten up + didn't eat or drink for days + the whole blood loss thing, so she is practically getting a first row experience into what is it like to have all of your organs shut down), but in the plan that I did for this chapter Deidara actually still felt some pain in her arm, so Tobi asks her to rate her current pain on scale from one to ten and Deidara says something like three. Obito is kind of relieved but still sus of her condition then asks how did it feel to have her arm ripped away and then this dunderhead replies with four or five and Obito just goes

😁fun stuff that didn't make it to the final version

- now onto "hey, that happened before and caused this!" part of the notes: so why the fuck Deidara's condition deteriorates so quickly after an entire day of strolling around and hiding in the bushes from possible ambushes? well, the answer is: the strangulation scene!

- I imagined that she's already pretty low on energy by the time she finds Tobi and Zetsu, but she keeps herself stable by simply conserving her energy at any opportunity. However, certain someone's yapping pissed her off so badly she does a very stupid thing and attacks them. This entire physical exertion moment is what kicks off what follows in this chapter. I believe that I even mentioned that she is struggling to stand up after trying to kill Tobi. so, er, thanks, Obito?

- and now she is simply on a clock before she'll pass out in forest because ain't no way she is making it to Ame in that condition

- another major downwards turn happenes when Deidara starts vomiting and falls over, no longer able to walk: if you notice, she actually just seconds before that rapidly turned around two times, angry that Tobi is trying to stop her from walking to Ame, but accidentally going the wrong way. She was already feeling pretty sick, and this movement is the final nail in the coffin for her poor empty stomach. so, er, thanks, Obito?

- His much wider gait allows him to quickly close the gap between him and the Akatsuki member, however Tobi never allows the distance to fall below some respectable ten or so meters

I actually mention through this walk how the distance changes between the two of them, Obito is thinking about his 927482838 things, while he is actually getting closer and closer to Deidara, first it's 10 meters, then it's 7, then 4, until he catches up to her, but not because Deidara wanted to slow down

- As the branch that Deidara previously avoided hits Obito in the chest and finally breaks in half

just me having fun with their height difference😁Deidara is at best Obito's chin level, so this is a thing that could happen

- I explained it quite a bit in the comments under the chapter, but there's a number of factors going for Obito not realizing what is wrong with Deidara: his paranoia about Zetsu, his dick still wanting some explanation to the events in "Hell", him losing touch with understanding the processes of human body because he has been that isolated from others for years, him assuming Akatsuki members won't die to some wounds and his assumption that Sasori did something about Deidara's left arm

- Besides, even with her current wounds, she has been trained by Iwagakure, so she would have a higher resistance to low-level and medium-level genjutsu

I'm trying to balance here what is known and unknown about Deidara's past, and I think it should be a common knowledge that Iwagakure has some special training in place against genjutsu (considering how broken they are), and Deidara, being Tsuchikage's student, would have to go through it, if not something tougher🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

- "Stop being so fucking daft and turn away already!" Deidara switches between passive irritation and angry outburst as quickly as her artworks go up in smoke."

So, in regards to Deidara's current mood: she is pissed at Tobi for watching her at her weakest. Like, wanna murder and bury your body right here pissed, but doesn't have enough strength to do it for the fear it'll make her feel worse. As far as Iwa's modern (I guess Mu and Onoki originated?) philosophy is that weakness is unacceptable under any circumstances. Showing weakness is crushing your pride, showing weakness is showing your worthlessness, and this cult of pride is being instilled in shinobi kids since young age. Not that people in Iwa don't naturally think very high of themselves

- "Obito's ears certainly felt hot even before Deidara started to sigh and cough while she continued to satisfy her urge somewhere at his hand level."

And another thing that I made a point to include in the first half of the chapter that goes away in the second with Deidara's quick descent into the afterlife - Obito's paranoia about Zetsu watching him and Obito's horny at the smallest things involving her, such as her drinking water. After our babygirl throws up, Obito doesn't think of the double trouble again for the remainder of this chapter.

Not only that, but Obito actually gets to undress and touch her body which would have awakened a rabid wild hog in him previously. I've actually changed Deidara's clothing a bit in the fic (all the way back in LTFG)

☝️exhibit of Deidara's clothing underneath Akatsuki cloak

to be completely honest I kind of disliked his top half of the design for years at this point. The color of the top is omega ugly and doesn't look good on him, and while practically everyone wears some mesh thingy in the manga, I can not concieve a practical reason for that. Either that's just pretty clothing (which is... why would an Akatsuki member wear something that doesn't help in combat?) or it's supposed to be some sort of body armor, but a) doesn't look to be that sturdy + Deidara rips it off his chest with ease b) it would just add weight to a ranged fighter who would, you know, rather avoid an attack on the vital organs rather than get hit and try to protect him with something.

So Girldara actually wears just a simple black top on her upper torso, no mesh or anything. Here's a photo of how I approximately imagine it looks:

Simple, doesn't restrain movement, comfy, all of which would have been pretty important for a nukenin like her. The cloaks, I think, would be enough to protect against the weather and temperature, so there's no need for her to dress anything beyond the pants, her belt bags and a top.

(and if you are wondering if she wears bra beneath it, well... I would say that no?🤣 ahahhahahaha. It would kind of get in the way and she isn't "endowed" enough to have to wear one to support her back🤣 but let's allow Obito to discover this fun little fact)

- "The eyelashes on her only visible eye shake as she gazes at Tobi in a stupor-like state, he is not even sure if she understands who he is at the moment."

an unexpected complaint, yeah, but I keep forgetting that Deidara's left eye is covered with a scope, so Obito can't actually see her eyes plural. I do remember that Obito has only one eye, but Google docs keep trying to fix both Deidara's eye and Obito's eye to plural🙄🙄🙄

also I often forget which side of Zetsu is which. Because Obito's left eye is gone, while Deidara's left one is covered by hair/scope, I constantly think that Black is the left half, when in reality it's the opposite💀💀💀💀

- "But Tobi thinks it looks okay! For a... well... limited edition limb. Sorry! Tobi's sorry! Please don't hit me, I'm just saying whatever comes to my mind!" Deidara simply makes an irritated grunt in reply, keeping her eyes closed."

If you haven't noticed, throught the entire "examination" Deidara keeps her eyes closed. She is trying to get back to her senses. But in the process she stops expecting seeing Tobi prancing around her, so when she does open her eyes, it's hard for her to focus and see things around her, her vision is getting blurry, and because she can't see clearly (and well whatever is on her mind) she freaks out

- a mild spoiler but what causes her to freak out is the color of Obito's mask. Certain someone from her past used to wear something orange and that set her off.

- I actually got around to designing this someone and I think I did a pretty good job getting them from my mind out onto the 3D model! Obviously, not showing it right now, but just keeping updated that some characters are already in the process of being developed

- okay but something actually drove me fucking nuts with the whole examination scene. so I finish writing Obito looking over her right arm, deciding that it looks okay enough and choosing to put something around it to prevent her from bleeding out later and kind of decreasing the necessity of her keeping up the chakra blocks, right? so I go open the dictionary for the word describing that thing to put around her arm and what I find is

tourniquet????

this feels like a fake word. like somebody made it up and placed it in the dictionary for funsies. why the fuck is it like that?

so I send it to my friends and ask them if it actually exist and describes the thing that I am trying to explain and they collectively reply that yeah, that's the word, sounds super fake, doesn't it?

anyway the executive decision for this chapter was to use the word "strap" because it does sound more sensible and appropriate for the context. yeah, "strap" also refers to a specific... device that a girl would wear with her freaky boyfriend (and I can't say that I haven't entertained such a scenario with Obito's bisexual ass, but anyway). in any case I would rather use the funny word rather than that one, because that feels like French propaganda that I'm not about to fall for.

- "Dumbass... a real shinobi knows how to take pain... with head held high..." Deidara interrupts Tobi's unserious musings with her croaking. "You're... worthless... if you can't handle pain..."

huh I wonder who could have told Deidara that🤭

- "No, sorry, not happening. I've got only one scarf, after all, and you've got a bunch of those cloaks that you guys don't even wanna share with Tobi. And it's Tobi's favorite too!"

This was me just messing around lmao. Tobi's and Obito's sentiments practically never coincide, but in this instance Tobi does say the truth and Obito actually values his ✨scarf✨ like a petty bitch lol

- also I believe that as chapter progresses I've been changing Tobi's speech pattern in "serious" situations, particularly by getting rid of the third person name calling (Tobi thinks/Tobi wants/Tobi can't) which actually sounds more natural in Japanese because it's not uncommon for someone to refer to themselves in third person in certain circumstances. Obito uses only "I" whenever shit starts hitting the fan

- "It was always him assuming that Pain and his people would act reasonably"

If you remember the description of the fic, the main thing around From Queen to a Pawn is Obito finally deciding to leave the shadows and join Akatsuki as their member, Tobi. This moment in particular refers to some of the biggest issues that Obito has ran into during this mission - all of Akatsuki members belonging to a suicide watch and caring only for their personal bullshit, even if that said bullshit will result in them or their fellow Akatsuki members getting killed😁so Obito will set out to watch everyone in the open and correct their movements so that Eye of the Moon doesn't end before even starting

- "Deidara's speech now sounds like an endless mess of slurred noises somewhat resembling human speech. Obito is unsure if it is becoming harder to understand her because of the Iwa accent suddenly returning to her or simply due to her tongue not following her brain's commands anymore."

I am a big fan of the whole "Five Great Shinobi nations actually don't speak the same way" idea. I would definetily say that Iwa, Suna and Kiri certainly should have civilians speaking different languages than the "common" one, which affects their speech a lot, so you can kind of guess where a shinobi is from based on the type and strength of their accent. Obito got rid of his years ago (plus I would say that Konoha's accent is by far the closest one to the "common" language of the continent), because it gets in the way whenever he must impersonate someone, he actually learned how to imitate most shinobi accents on the go. Deidara used to have Iwa one and a pretty strong one at that, but she had spent half of her life away from her homeland, so she practically never shows it. I'd say most of Akatsuki members end up losing their hyper specific accent after a few years, so their speech is pretty close to each other's.

- "I wasn't late, I am not late, I can not be late, she survived, she survived even when all believed her to be a goner, she can't die now, not like this."

One of the main ideas that I had coming into this fic is to parallel Rin's death with Deidara's aftermath of the Kazekage capture mission. Obviously, Obito was too late to arrive to save Rin, and when he goes off to find Deidara, he eventually starts succumbing to despair and assuming her to be dead as well. Obviously, she proves him wrong, and so he gets this childish and hopeful idea that everything is going to be alright, because he was not late this time. Of course, nothing is fine, as Deidara is about to die in the middle of the forest from an untreated gangrene, so Obito gets a choice: to follow Madara's (Deidara is a disposable tool ultimately not really important for the plan) and Tobi's (incompetent idiot that won't be able to do anything for Deidara regardless of how hard he tries) role or to follow what Uchiha Obito set out to do 16 years before the current events and failed at (saving the girl of his interest from a certain death). Well, you know how the rest of the chapter goes, but it is one of the first steps that Obito takes in Deidara's direction😁

- "Hey, hey, hey, Deidara-san, I'm bored. Like, sooooo bored. Can we sing a song? I know one about nine cute ducklings and a scary crow!"

I was writing that particular part during my flight after IELTS, so I couldn't google any real kids' rhythems, thus I simply ended up making up something on the go. The nine cute ducklings are supposed to be the Akatsuki members, while Obito is the scary crow lmao

- "Tobi twirls in place as he jumps onto a clearing with no grass, likely burnt down by a forest fire in the past summer, the earth beneath his feet dry and chunky, as he almost collides with charred tree stump."

The choice for "Obito tweaking the fuck out" scene was to contrast Rin's death scene. Obviously, Deidara finds Zetsu and Tobi in the middle of the day, so she passes out under the sunlight, while Rin died in the middle of the night with full moon present. But besides the whole Sun and Moon thing, I've also decided to contrast "dry" and "wet" qualities of both scenes. Obito is sitting on a burnt down clearing, the earth there is cracked and dry, sun is burning as they are in hot climate, compared to the massacre that Obito commited back then, with everything ending up wet and covered in blood.

- "The edges of his vision are trembling as Obito slowly lowers his face to finally take a look at who (not what, not what, not what) he was holding."

Another thing that I did for this scene - Deidara is no longer referred to by her name, only "she" all the way until, I believe, Obito makes the decision to try and save her with Kamui. This is to amplify that feeling of Obito no longer being able to tell apart who he is holding, because again he is having his wonderful PTSD attack

- "Obito keeps supporting the girl's back with his left arm while he is trying to tighten the makeshift strap above the now bleeding wound."

Again, I was writing this part during the plane ride, so I couldn't check the manga, but later as I was editing the chapter, I realized that I accidentaly did some very funny contrast between this scene and Rin's death.

So, what happens is Obito picks Deidara up with her right side pressed against him, meaning that for the rest of the chapter Obito is holding her back with his left arm, Deidara is supported by his still fully human part of the body

Meanwhile if we compare it to Rin's death

It's actually the opposite

Obito is holding Rin with his right arm, the one that was destroyed and replaced by Madara

:D

- "A few seconds later a strong trembling overtakes her entire body, something moves in her throat and blood begins to leak from her mouth too, painting the left corner of it red."

Also an intended simularity

- "If he glances to the right, he can see silhouettes of newborn trees, their bark shining pearly white in the impenetrable darkness of the night, bearing their first fruits clad in blue-gray uniform and masks, the air heavy and moist from the bloodshed in it. And if he glances to the left, thick forest dances in the bright rays of sun, creating a somber melody for the burnt down clearing, empty and dead and so damn cold."

Again with the whole right and left thing - to Obito's right it's his massacre of the Blood Mist ninja, while on his left what is actually taking place

- "But no matter where he looks, one thing remains the same: a body of a girl in his arms, her face covered in blood, thin streaks of it running down from her mouth, pale and unmoving, but with a bizarrely serene expression on her face, as if at long last she is at absolute peace."

This paragraph can refer to both Rin and Deidara, it's specifically vague like that

- "Where the moon doesn't reflect off of her blood-soaked brown hair.

Where the sun doesn't make her long messy bangs shine like gold against the paleness of her skin."

That's as close to Sun and Moon analogy as I could get lmao

Aaaand that's about it for this chapter? Most of the remaining stuff is self-explanatory in my opinion lmao. Now onto finishing "Obito's no-good terrible bad day"🤭

[nerdystarstruckace]

I saw a really interesting mha take. (Not in a good way) The base message of it was 'bakugou telling midoriya to kill himself wasn't that big of a deal because he was 13 and 13 year olds don't understand those words have that effect'. Let's go over why this take defends bullying and actually in the end hurts bakugous character???

Most of my friends know I'm not a bakugou fan (esp early seasons) but even I can acknowledge he had a hell of a redemption. It took so damn long, and yk what? He's still a jack ass sometimes, but he's not a bully anymore. When bakugou bullied deku and told him to kill himself, he was 14 about to turn 15. How do we know this? Well! In Japan the school year starts in April! The entrance exam (which is ten months after the first episode) takes place in February. Soooo, first episode is probably early-mid April so bakugou is Abt to be 15 (April 20th). This makes Bakugou not a 13 year old (lol).

Even if he was 13, it doesn't defend his actions. Now, I've interacted with a lot of Middle schoolers, and not all of them are mean. The ones who are mean know what they are saying when they tell someone (seriously) to kill themselves. I myself was younger than the characters when I started watching MHA, and I immediately knew that was bullying. Don't use the BS of "13 (actually 14/15) year olds don't know better!" Because it makes teens that age seem stupid and honestly? It defends bullying.

Bakugou fucked up with his treatment of deku, his treatment of him was textbook bullying. And to defend that is wild. The person also in their take stated that deku recognized that what bakugou said was wrong but he understood how dangerous it was...so deku who is younger than Bakugou could understand but bakugou couldn't? Bakugous character growth is so appealing because it was a true transformation of a bully. It hurts me to watch bc it reminds me of people in my own life. It is disrespectful to the beautiful character/redemption arc to try to excuse the bullying, and it's disrespectful to victims of bullying similar to this.

I understand loving and defending a character, but you can acknowledge their wrongs while loving them. So while this person with this take obviously likes bakugou, they missed the point of him. He was a bully. He traumatized deku for life, and most likely? He can never 'fix' that, but he can regret it and grow and move on. That is who he is, so to take that away from him is to reduce him to just an entertaining jackass. Anyway, that's my rant on a take I heard! And there's more I could have said but it's already too long lol.(No disrespect or bad feelings to person who said the take)

[lunar-years]

2, 5 and 8 for Ted Lasso for the ask game <3

2. a headcanon you weren't sure about at first but have come to like!

Jamie (very occasionally) soft-domming Roy. As a little treat for both of them.

Roy had a ring and planned to propose to Keeley in Marbella (because you know what, it's just like Roy to be like: Well, I fear this relationship is floundering and speed running towards it's inevitable conclusion. I know exactly what will fix it: a 6 week long holiday and a proposal! WHAT 🤦‍♀️ A disaster! ❌)

i'm not really a gay!Roy truther at all because i'm in too deep on the roykeeley/ot3 of it all, but I can set that aside to enjoy: so afraid that time will take it all from me by LikeAMovieIOnceSaw. It is a brilliant and exceptional fic that 100% had me fully believing in gay!Roy for the entirety of reading it.

5. something you see a lot in fics and love

use of the the following nicknames: Jay-Jay, Jay, Jam Tartt, Keels <3

during the post s2 hiatus I absolutely ate up any fic whatsoever where Jamie starts staying with RoyKeeley because of Heavy Circumstances, and what starts as 'temporary' quickly becomes something more permanent as they grow into a relationship

Jamie being injured on the pitch or from violence with his dad or what have you, and Roy and/or Keeley worrying and fretting over him. bonus points if he's in the hospital and Roy and Keeley are worrying and fretting at his bedside!

Roy taking Jamie home/over to Keeley's after Man City and taking care of him.

jamiegender stuff

8. you hope more people will come to appreciate ___ (a ship, a trope, an episode, etc)

the good stuff about s3 (it wasn't ALL bad you guys!!)

jamiekeeley at all stages

how romantic Roy is (dare I say he's the most romantic of the trio?)

Nate deserved redemption and his arc was much better than people will tell you it was (not perfect, obviously. but good!)

How happy Rebecca is in Amsterdam with Matthijs. "the real rebecca is silly" ...and what an embodiment of that her plot is Amsterdam is!! it was romcom material idc

Sam and Jamie best friendism. I feel like we DO appreciate this as a fandom and yet we still don't talk about them enough lol idk. you can never have too much samjamie appreciation.

Fandom Ask Game

[kimkhimhant]

It's me again, I'm hesitant about reblogging because my first ask was spoilery but in the end, who cares lmao. FUCK I forgot about Sara. I agree that the ending was choppy, especially the hospital scene... he moved from ambulance to post-mortem way too fast. What always gets me though is Peter's breakdown. He's alone, and it hits this unemotional man with full force. It's magnificent. I'm also just... sad that Neal was made to believe that he could never fully change. He deserved better. He tried so hard and he WAS succeeding despite Mozzie's disappointed resistance plus everyone else's mistrust. Thanks for geeking out on this with me hehee

hi again!!!

ugh yes Peter's breakdown is heartwrenching, and it brings me back to a line he says earlier in the show, i don't remember the exact words, but he says something about how if something were to happen to Neal, he doesn't know if he'll be able to live with it. and i just. yeah. ow. lol

now buckle up for another character analysis essay bc i can't shut up ever lol

Honestly i have a lot of mixed feelings about Neal's "redemption/reformation" ! because yes he wants to be good, but also... i don't think a true/complete redemption arc is necessary for his character, and i honestly like that he doesn't have one? I think that the most important aspect of his character development in that sense is that, he considers the effects of his actions on other people a lot more by the end, and i think that's all the reformation that he needs and that makes sense for him. I don't think he needs to become someone who commits no crimes/cons in order for his reformation to be recognized.

i think what i'm more sad about is the lack of recognition for that development. he isn't perfect, and he still has a lot of vices, but now his actions are almost all out of a desire to fix things/protect people/etc. Most of the other characters, namely Peter, don't seem to recognize or appreciate this development. Understandable, to an extent – Peter has dedicated his life to law enforcement, and his moral code is, for the most part, aligned with the law. Neal is still breaking the law, even if, in his own mind, Neal is doing so with good intentions, to Peter, the outcome matters a lot more than the intent.

Neal begins the show as a con-artist and art thief whose priority is his own enjoyment and gain, and he ends the show still a con-artist and art thief, but now his priority is shifted. In the later seasons, almost none of the crimes he commits are simply for the hell of it. there's almost always a reason, and the reason is almost always to fix something or to protect the people he loves. his moral code is still very distorted, and he has a strong disregard for the law and authority, but he also cares about other people, their safety, happiness and their opinions of him. He still loves the thrill of the con, and he still loves living luxuriously, he's still impulsive, and he's still very proud of his skills, but...

these things don't make him "bad," in my opinion. He wants to be good, and he is good. His intentions are good, it's just that the way he understands and navigates the world isn't aligned with "legal good."

I could write an essay on that alone. Neal is very traumatized, and very good at compartmentalizing and masking so that no one can tell, and also (this is entering headcanon zone) probably some form of neurodivergence, on top of probable CPTSD and some kind of personality disorder. So, obviously his relationship with the world as a whole is... disrupted and warped by these things, so maybe that's one of the main issues. "moral and good" as Neal understands these things, simply don't perfectly align with most people's definitions of them.

And I think this is the main issue in his relationship with Peter. Neal wants to be good, and is trying to be, and he wants Peter's recognition and appreciation for that. But that's still not enough for Peter, who operates on a different moral code, and doesn't understand Neal's perspective.

Once again, this is very longwinded, but basically: I think Neal did have as much of a redemption arc as he could have had without having a complete shift in worldview, and I really like that about him and his character. That he didn't end the series as a perfectly reformed ex-con, but he did end the show as a good person.

[kbrick]

What do you think about the Draco haters? Personally I don't get them. I don't get how you can feel hatred for a child who was raised by fucked up people and then had to do awful things that he obviously hated to survive and keep his family safe too. All as a minor. Where has all the empathy gone? It's like they think they're talking about a hardened criminal lol. Why are people like this?

Okay, I'll be honest with you, nonny, I'm of two minds about this.

The thing that I feel in my gut when I see this sentiment out in the wild is irritation and maybe a little flare of anger. Because I love Draco. He's my favorite. I empathize with Draco, with what he went through in canon, and I also associate him with the thousand redemption character arcs I've read about him at this point. Have I argued with people on reddit over whether Draco should have been sentenced to life in Azkaban? Yes, I have. Am I proud of that? No, I am not. Looking back, it kinda makes me feel like an idiot.

I try to remind myself of two things when I feel this way. One, Draco is a character, not a real person, and we're talking about literature, not real life, and so it's really not that serious (please note - this is not usually effective in talking myself down off the ledge, but it ought to be mentioned).

And two, I used to hate (well, maybe strongly dislike) Draco.

I came to the fandom late (as a full-fledged adult!), but in my younger years, I was a big HP fan. I had all the books on a bookshelf in my room, I had a poster, I had pencils with big erasers on the end in the shape of the house mascots. I had my favorite Harry Potter mug (which just recently met an ignoble end on my kitchen floor, RIP favorite mug - and now I can't buy a replacement because I no longer buy HP merch because JKR is such a terrible human being and I refuse to support her...but I digress!).

And let's be honest: Draco Malfoy is a complete asshat in the books. He's the villain. He's petty, he's mean, he's arrogant with nothing at all to back it up. He says horrible things to Hermione, who was my very favorite character back when I read the series. And I was young enough to accept characters at face value back then, so yeah, I kind of hated Draco. I wasn't ranting about him online or anything, but if somebody would have asked me what I thought of him, I'd have probably blown a raspberry and given them a thumbs down.

It wasn't until the later books (Half-Blood Prince, specifically), that I began to neutralize on my view of Draco. Even back then, I felt bad for him in that bathroom scene. But it wasn't until I started reading Drarry (as an adult) that I looked back at Draco as a character and realized what a fucking delight he actually was (not in the sense that he was 'good' or whatever, but he was an excellent foil for Harry and was incredibly entertaining).

And part of this is maturity, I think. As a full-fledged adult, I no longer take characters at face value. I no longer think- oh, this character is being mean to the good guy, therefore they are a bad guy and I hate them. Instead, I think - wow, something is going on with this character, to make them act this way. They're so desperate for attention, or they're so insecure, or they were hurt so badly when xyz happened that they're lashing out. I look for the WHYS in characters. And Draco has a lot of whys, especially in fanon, and so it has become easy to empathize with him and like him.

Another part of it is that I have become a writer, and I appreciate complicated, compelling characters, and I'm no longer interested in Mary Sue good guys who are always noble and do everything right. Because let's be honest: people are not that way. We shouldn't write them that way. That's not truth, and I want to read and write truth.

But for readers who do not value characters beyond the hero, or who have chosen not to look more closely at character whys, Draco is a bad guy. He's not insecure; he's arrogant. It's not hurt feelings; it's a mean streak. And to be frank, I think JKR herself viewed Draco in this way (for the most part). Yes, she gave him some depth towards the end of the books, but I honestly think that was due to pressure from fans who wanted a redemption arc for Draco (and really, it's a half-assed redemption arc at best). I think JKR is a mostly black-and-white thinker, and I think she wrote a mostly black-and-white series. Harry and his friends are good, Draco and his friends are bad. Voldemort is evil. The end.

So I suppose what I'm saying is that I understand why people don't like Draco as a character. I think it suggests a bit of closed-mindedness on their parts, and maybe a lack of empathy, and that they're horribly boring irl (ha, had to get that dig in there). But the truth is that people are allowed to feel how they want to feel about characters. I'm not the interpretation police.

Does that mean I no longer get fired up when somebody on reddit says Draco should've been sentenced to life in Azkaban? Nope, I'm not that mature, come on. Will I continue arguing with them about it? I hope I'm beyond that, but we'll see. Do I still love Draco with all my heart? I do, and so you know what? I'm going to keep writing about him and enjoying him.

That's about all I have to say about that. Which was a LOT, actually. Who knew?

Thanks for the ask, nonny :) It was an interesting one.

[fluffywings13]

Hi~

In your last story you talked about Yuuji giving Sukuna a second chance, I was wondering if you could imagine him having a redemption arc (I mean sort of because I honestly love how Sukuna is as an evil person *lol*) in your stories or in the Manga?

I mean as if in a turn of events, Sorcerers are also not that good towards humans and curses alike to be fair... And I feel as if the Manga is based on their opinion mostly but I would love a backstory (evil or not) on Sukuna ! Sorry I digress... But I love how you portray him in your stories, both evil and soft for his children/ Yuuji , I absolutely loved how non-judgemental he was when Yuuji admitted he liked being tickled (also, real thought, I definitely imagine Sukuna is ticklish but the person trying to get him would die *-*)

I love your stories, and I hope you'll have an amazing day!

Hi!! Welcome Anon!

I'm actually so happy that you asked this because I've been dying to get into my thoughts on the matter of Sukuna and his motives and the possibility of a redemption arc for him.

I think I could definitely see a redemption arc for him, at the very least he definitely has one in my own world that I've created, and from what very little we know about him in the Manga/Anime it's very possible. Redemption is not the word I'd use though, I'd say in a manner of speaking, he's allowed the opportunity to show his true colors. So to say.

As we all know, history is written by the victor, and as a species humanity is well known for not looking kindly on things we don't understand. Personally, I think the second set of eyes came in after his resurrection as a Cursed Spirit, but his image with four arms is his natural form. Based on the real Ryomen Sukuna we know of, historically he did have four arms, and because of this he was treated with disdain and cruelty.

I personally love the idea of Sukuna being more on the Evil Side because of betrayal and the heinous treatment he received for being a 'mutant' as he was. Due to the fact that it was the Jujutsu Sorcerers of the time he was hunted down and slaughtered who wrote the Story that the Jujutsu World knows (and thus us as the Reader/Watcher see too) it's hard to imagine them writing that Sukuna was a decent person with a kind heart while then describing how they savagely killed him for no other reason then being something they didn't understand.

In my opinion, originally, despite how he was treated by those around him for his 'deformities' Sukuna wasn't the Evil Power Hungry Villain he was painted out to be. Obviously he had Cursed Energy, strong Cursed Energy at that, but I imagine him being sort of a recluse and keeping mainly to himself because from his experience being around normal society those like him are met with disdain and mistreatment. He wasn't evil, not at the start, he wasn't cruel, not in the beginning. As he became stronger of his own learning and such, due to the fact he was already perceived as a 'bad omen' or even more a 'curse' because of his appearance, he was betrayed.

His initial statement of "You Jujutsu Sorcerers never change! No matter the Era!" is very telling to me in the way things actually went down between them back in the day. It gives way, in my opinion, that perhaps he faced betrayal by someone or a small group of individuals that he trusted and was brutally murdered for it. Sukuna was then reborn from the fear and hatred of those who knew him and the hatred he had in his own heart for the people he thought he could trust who turned on him without hesitation.

The idea that Yuuji treats him as a Person over that of a Curse, not so much as overlooking the things he did after he came back as a Cursed Spirit but not allowing the opinions of others to determine his own view of someone, is so important to me. Because I feel as if the Sukuna written about in the Jujutsu Texts and the real Sukuna without given reason to treat someone with disdain and hatred are two vastly different individuals.

Yuuji treating Sukuna like he does everyone else, with decency and humanity and respect, could very well be what breaks this Character Sukuna's been forced into playing. A means to show the others that you shouldn't believe everything you hear or read, especially the latter in a historical context, because often more times then not vital details are always left out to give way to the notion that the savagery that was bestowed upon a person/civilization was deserved to ensure those who did the act don't come out appearing as Mass Murderers/Savages themselves. Ultimately shifting the blame from the true Evil party to the Party who could not defend themselves due to the fact of their ultimate vanquishing.

LOL sorry for rambling!! Hope this makes sense!!

[atamascolily]

Lily liveblogs: Thunderbolt Fantasy 4x05

"Have fun storming the castle!"

picking up from where we left off last week with the road trip through the Wasteland of Spirits and Juan Can Yun and Dan Fei asking "Are we there yet?"

Shang: Don't make me turn this expedition around!

they want to stop and rest in a crevasse and Shang thinks this is a bad idea but they do it anyway

they are attacked by evil vines and NOPE it back out into the sandstorm, lololol

Wasteland of Spirits is Tatooine from Star Wars, confirmed

I don't know why Shang thought he could just let these kids go off by themselves, thank goodness he got smacked by plot or else they'd be toast.

meanwhile, in the demon realm, Chao Feng's sole surviving officer freaks out and runs off... straight into a han jiao's mouth and is devoured on camera with lots of blood and gore. OM NOM NOM.

Chao Feng also freaks the fuck out, but is saved by Mu Tian Ming. When Chao Feng asks why, she's like, "I dunno, seemed like a good idea at the time". beautiful cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure.

Instead of thanking her, Chao Feng yells at Tian Ming for taking Lang away and says it's all her fault; Tian Ming does not slap her across the face, but says that that might be true if Lang came here by chance, but she thinks he has a purpose. AND SHE'S RIGHT.

I hope Chao Feng has a redemption arc, but I fear for the worst for Lang and Tian Ming and everybody else as soon as she finds herself on more solid ground. (you just know Azibelpher will LOVE her scheming little mind)

The Order of the Divine Swarm arrives at Azibelpher's castle and Ba Wang Yu decides to storm the gates while Hua Wu Zong turns invisible and slips inside in the chaos. Lin, disguised as Piao Miao, opts to wait outside and watch.

this pays off when Xing Hai shows up with Lang and he immediately switches back to his normal form to surprise them.

Lin immediately picks up that Lang is part demon (the horn kinda gave it away, lol) and turns him temporarily invisible so he can sneak into the castle. He then turns his attention to charming exposition out of Xing Hai and plays her like a damn fiddle.

elsewhere, Ansaato is skittering around the Demon Court on his little insect legs (complete with sound effects) and is pissed that Azibelpher is early for their meeting (and apparently in the flesh???)

the other nobles show up, including Parasol Lady my beloved, but unfortunately, we don't get a good sense of their personalities in their brief back and forth. Other demons include: Covid Safety Protocols (wears a mask); Megamind (turban, big head); and Blue Enforcer of the Status Quo. I thought Megamind was going to be an evil advisor based on his character design, but he's just a guy, I guess??? At least there's nothing much to distinguish him here.

the demon king is a shadowy figure hidden behind a screen and HMMM THAT SEEMS FAMILIAR WHERE HAVE I SEEN THAT ONE BEFORE, but he's got a new VA, so he's probably not somebody we already know. Probably.

(can you tell I'm still scarred from last season's reveal, lol)

turns out that the statue macguffins are seals that allow you to summon demon gods if you get a quorum (4). There are 8 total, one for each demon noble and the king.

everybody is freaked out that Jia Li is dead and her seal is missing. Azi plays innocent, lol.

Lin finds all this out from Xing Hai, so he'll probably start collecting them now because thieves gonna thieve. Lang is also collecting them, but he's the only one at this point who doesn't know what they do, and this is probably all part of Azi's plan to awaken the demon gods and start the War of the Fading Dusk in earnest.

[look, if you put a sleeping demon god in the first episode, it had damn well better wake up by the last episode, I'm just saying].

also Lin has decided to torment Xing Hai by speculating he might be a demon, too because he's not affected by the demon realm the way a normal human should be.

he's trolling, obviously, but it's funny because he uses the same phrase Shang does: "no matter what anyone chooses to call me, it doesn't matter because I know who I am"

I've said this before and I'll say it again: Shang and Lin are opposites, complements, parallels, and foils, and also archetypal, and this extends to their backstories as well, which means it's unlikely that we'll see parents for either of them.

Xing Hai is objectively speaking a terrible person but I feel so bad for her because her shitty kind-of ex being a demon would solve a lot of problems for her because demons are supposed to be shitty to each other. So she's actually really into this, and while nothing Lin says is an outright lie, it certainly isn't the full truth.

{Xing Hai being in love with Lin is mostly subtext in the show itself, but it's in the light novel, and also there is a delightful series of social media posts where she fantasizes about what to do with him when he's theoretically under Seven Blasphemous Death's control and one of them is marrying him in a Western-style wedding with Azibelpher as the minister. And even then they're STILL not the most toxic het couple in the show by a wide margin!!!!}

meanwhile, Ba Wang Yu murders everybody and walks into the castle and Lin tells Xing Hai that Azibelpher isn't there because otherwise some would have stayed back to defend their master.

[this is why Azi was at the meeting early, lol]

Cut to Lang Wu Yao wandering around the empty castle, only for Spider to sneak up on him with chains, believing him to be Azibelpher.

.... you know what, he's not exactly wrong, Lang really does resemble his dad and the portraits are everywhere because Azibelpher lives in a gothic castle and has decorated accordingly

I really hope Wasp and Spider team up with Lang since they all hate Azibelpher, because the alternative is that Lang kills both of them next episode and I want to keep them around for as long as possible.

this episode is so fucking funny and I laughed so hard, twenty minutes just FLEW by, can't wait for next week