#like i'll let it carry on its. thing. but once it does go from the playlist it's forever tied to a specific time
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eggmeralda · 1 year ago
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thinking about the unfairness of my most listened to songs of the past 6 months
no. 2 is gazin by ringo deathstarr which is like. that's so nice bc i started listening to that the day after spotify stopped counting listens last year so it never got a chance to be in my spotify wrapped, but I'm like 99% sure it's gonna be in there this year, so it finally gets its recognition
but no. 1 is hate yourself by tv girl, which was one of the biggest songs I listened to in 2022? like you've already had your moment. why are you no. 1. let one of the other songs have a chance
but it's such a banger that it'll probably end up being no. 1 anyway
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kcrossvine-art · 8 months ago
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Hi fellow adventurers!! Welcome to chapter 2! We're going to be attempting a nice lil fruit-focused quiche/frittata/pie thing. And yes, tomatoes are fruits.
Who says you cant eat totally normal things in a dungeon with definitely no monsters in them? 
You know what that means; Man-Eating Plant Tart!
(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)
MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS
SO, “what goes in to a Man-Eating Plant Tart?” YOU MIGHT ASKThe way its prepared in the show is akin to a frittata, but the crust is borrowed from quiche world.
Eggs
Whole milk
Bell peppers
Persimmons
Cherry tomatoes
Pitted green olives
Thinly sliced OR shredded sweet potatos
Salt
Pepper
In the show they use leftover hotpot stock, slime, and mashed up fruit as the batter ingredients. Fruit mush is easy to work with but I couldn't find any stand-in for slime that would cook correctly into what they made in the show, and the hotpot stock is just not thick enough to carry the base. It is too many watery ingredients at once. Needing a thickening agent, both gelatin and agar agar were tried. It was edible but the texture was… gelatinous. Regular egg and milk will serve for our purposes.
The next complication was the crust- so in the show its made with the skins of fruit, straightforward yeah? Well. You see it also has to be 1. Thick enough to bake without burning 2. Harden through cooking to be sliced and held and 3. Inedible. Lotus leaves? Plantain leaves? Really thin gourds? I couldnt find any historical basis for a savory food cooked in this method, or similar method, with an intentionally inedible crust. I could find a few dishes which used leaves as their crust, but none that hardened during cooking and even less that used fruit skin. I chose sweet potato skin for its visual match and texture. It is edible, and it is not a fruit.
I hope youll forgive me for these 2 major deviations as i wanted to keep it looking how it does in the show while also ensuring it tastes good.
AND, “what does a Man-Eating Plant Tart taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASKFluffy, airy, savory, salty.
The density of the eggs is offset by the crisp fruits
And the saltiness doesnt overpower the remnant fruit-sweetness
(If you eat the crust) the sweet potato brings this nice muted, smokey, flavor
Spongecake-esque in consistency
Would pair well with cranberry or strawberry juice
Would also pair well with a mellow hot sauce?
. You can use heavy cream instead of milk for a creamier batter . Roast the fruit longer to remove more liquid if too wet (and vice versa if too dry) . Smoked paprika, pepper flakes, cumin, garlic powder, and onion powder would taste good in the mixture
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"A mixture of mashed up and cut up Man-Eating Plant fruit, slime and scorpion soup is poured into a pan lined with the flattened peel of the fruit and cooked before garnishing with some more fruit. Described as salty by the group."
From start to finish this recipe took 3-ish hours? Shredding the potatoes took the longest, so if you get them bagged itd be cut down. A very filling recipe and a good way to sneak veggies/fruits in if you have a hard time getting enough of those essential nutrients. The best advice i can give is to add salt/seasonings at every stage of the process, to build up layers. It makes a difference flavor-wise (even if its just salt). I advise against reheating if possible. The filling will make the crust soggy over time.
If you want to be closer to the cooking of the show, you could double the fruit amounts and mash them together while halving the amount of egg and milk. I hadnt tried due to budget reasons, but it should work with some finangling. I'll pass the final verdict off to you guys with how todays recipe turned out <333
What would you rate this recipe out of 10? (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) Did you love it, did you hate it? What're your thoughts on what I could do better, and what would you have done instead?
🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁
Ingredients:
3 Eggs
13oz whole milk
2 bell peppers
2 small persimmons
140oz cherry tomatoes
12oz pitted green olives
34oz thinly sliced OR shredded sweet potatos
Salt
Pepper
Method:
Heat oven to 420f and grease a 9-inch pie pan.
Thinly slice (or shred) your sweet potatoes and squeeze out any excess moisture. Coat in olive oil, salt and pepper.
Press sweet potato mixture evenly into and up the sides of the pie pan.
Blind bake for roughly 25 minutes or until lightly golden-brown. No worries if the edges get crisp.
Remove pie pan from oven and set aside.
Core and chop up your bell peppers and persimmons. Coat with olive oil, salt, and pepper.
Line out on a baking sheet, evenly spaced, and roast for roughly 20 minutes or until softened. (you can do this at the same time on a separate rack from the pie crust if you have room)
Remove the stems from your cherry tomatoes, and drain/dry your green olives if canned.
Bring a frying pan to medium heat with olive oil. Add the green olives and sautee until their skin texture starts dimpling. Add the cherry tomatoes and continue sauteeing for about 5 minutes or until lightly browned.
Once the bell peppers, persimmons, cherry tomatoes, and green olives are all done, set aside to cool until just above room temp.
Lower the oven temperature to 350f.
In a mixing bowl combine your eggs and milk, add salt to taste. If you want other seasonings nows a good time!
Once uniform in color and texture, add your cooked fruit. Stir until evenly distributed.
Pour mixture into the potato pie crust.
Bake for roughly 40 minutes. The filling should be mostly firm, but wiggle *slightly* when you shake the pan.
Remove from oven and let rest for roughly 15 minutes before serving.
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mattslolita · 4 months ago
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plane to paris - c. sturniolo
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in which ... having been in love with him for years, you confess your undying affection for chris just moments before you meet your demise. ( best friend!chris x black!fem!reader )
warnings ; pure sadness, mentions of death, angst, crying
"𝒓𝒊𝒅𝒊𝒏' 𝒐𝒏 𝒂 𝒅𝒐𝒐𝒎𝒔𝒅𝒂𝒚 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒊 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒌 𝒐𝒇 𝒊𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖."
˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰
"now boarding, paris, france at gate seven."
you sighed gently, checking your pocket to make sure that your passport and plane ticket were present — this art gala in which you were invited to showcase your own art would be an amazing experience, as well as a much needed vacation from the things you faced at home. the life surrounding your best friends was something they loved you to be apart of, but you couldn't shake the suffocating feeling it gave you. of course, it didn't necessarily have anything to do with their fame — the problem is between you and your best friend chris. but honestly speaking? this problem had grown when you made the mistake of slowly falling in love with him over the years.
anybody with eyes and common sense could see how you cared for chris — everyone except himself. you'd follow him blindly to the ends of the earth like the lovesick young girl you had been, and over time you learned to hide it from everyone; you lied, saying it was a silly crush that you had eventually grown out of. but you couldn't lie to yourself — you would always love chris.
taking one last look at the airport, you get your passport and ticket scanned, then hurriedly walk past the gate. pausing just briefly, you look up and examine the delta airlines with its door open, urging you forward. just then, you feel a wave of uncertainty — something inside was telling you that things were a little off; you quite possible could have been about to make a mistake. but your heart was telling you that for once, you needed a break from the seemingly never ending unrequited love cycle you fell into with chris.
once on the plane, you walked down the row until you reached your designated seat — you hoisted your bags overhead of you just as a sweet looking older woman came to reside next to you, carrying nothing but a pocketbook and gold fountain pen. you take the window seat and she casts you a warm smile as she sits down next to you.
"and what takes you to paris, my dear?" the woman asks you, her eyes twinkling curiously as she studies you.
"oh, um there's an art gala that i'm supposed to be attending," you explain to her, "they're gonna present my art, too."
"that's just wonderful!" the woman smiles, but she tilts her head at you, "and you're going alone? no handsome young man will accompany you?"
you laugh sadly, shaking your head. "i'm afraid i'll be making this trip by myself."
she nods to you in content, and that's when you notice she takes her pocketbook out as well as the fountain pen, which piques your interest. "may i ask what you're writing?"
"why, today's no better time but to write my will," the older woman tells you. as she looks into your eyes, you notice a glimmer in them, sparking up the uncertainty you felt moments before you boarded the plane.
you nod in understanding, deciding to take your phone out of your pocket — opening instagram, you snap a quick picture and caption it 'taking off.' you added the location of the boston airport then posted it to your story, letting out a small breath; then you took your airpods out and clicked shuffle on a playlust, enjoying the music that flowed throughout your ears, as the plane ascended into the sky.
chris sturniolo had finally been able to have a break from his job, and he and his brothers decided they would come back to boston to visit their parents and best friends — nathan doe and y/n l/n were chris's best friends who lived in their hometown, and he didn't get to see them as much anymore.
truth be told he missed the days of their youth when they'd spend every day attached to each other's hips; chris and y/n were thick as thieves, and he missed his partner in crime — her smile, her laugh, the usual box braids she wore with the charms he helped put in her hair, the way she could walk into a room and instantly make those around her happier, her artistic nature...
unfortunately though when chris had arrived with his brothers at nate's house, he informed them about your art gala in paris that would display your art. he couldn't be happier for you, as he knew art was one of your greatest passions — he just wished he'd had the chance to say goodbye and good luck to you before you departed.
when you and chris were twelve years old, your father up and left out of the blue one night; the next morning, you found a note he wrote to you — he ended it saying 'this isn't a goodbye, y/n. i'll see you later.' from then on whenever you and chris departed from each other, you never said goodbye — it was always see you later.
chris, his brothers, and nate currently resided on nate's living room couch to watch the celtics basketball game that was taking place at the moment. if you had been there watching with them, you would've been laughing with nick about how overdramatic nate, chris, and matt were being. he smiled at the thought, picking his phone up from the side of him as the game continued.
he opened instagram, and your story popped up first much to his relief — a picture of the wing of the delta airline plane stared back at him, as well as the caption 'taking off' with a white heart residing next to it. chris smiles and presses a like to the story, silently hoping that you smiled at the notification.
just then a strange feeling tugs at chris's heart; and he realizes he'll be missing you longer than he thought.
he reaches for the remote that sits on the dining table in front of the four boys, causing nate to furrow his eyebrows at the boy. "c'mon man, what're you doin?"
"m'just turning it up some," chris explains.
his finger however misses the volume button and lands on the channel one instead, causing nate and matt to groan furiously as it switches to the news.
"dude, you just-"
"hold on, quiet for a sec," chris says suddenly as his eyes find themselves glued to the headline staring back at him.
"just in about an hour earlier, delta airlines plane to paris catches fire and crashes just before reaching new york. no information yet on what caused the fire, but the innocent lives of 200 passengers including the plane's captain had been lost today on this tragic afternoon."
chris feels his heart drop and sink to his knees, frozen in place as tears fill his vision, blurring his waterline — matt is quick to get up and curse profanities as tears stream down his face, whilst he shakes his head; nick cries to their parents on the phone, telling them that it wasn't fair; nate babbles about how it couldn't be y/n's plane from boston as tears cascade down his cheeks.
chris can hardly breathe in this moment, hearing his heart beat wildly in his eardrums — no, he refused it. there was just no way that she was gone. he wanted to sue boston airport for allowing a faulty plane the permission to even take off.
how could they take off with you on that plane?
it wasn't fair — you were so good, so pure at heart. you had an amazing soul, always helping and giving to those around you whether it was monetary or as simple as a much needed hug. and oh, the way you loved — you loved people with such a strong force that anyone around you could feel the aura, could see the love you projected. chris has witnessed it more times than he can count.
he knew it because of the way you loved him — and for so long, chris wanted to love you with the same force you loved him.
a ding from chris's phone causes him to look at the cellular device in disdain, expecting either his parents or your mother to have been calling him — what he didn't except, was to see a voicemail.
from your number, that only just came through.
"she called me?" chris whispers, his voice cracked and barely audible, but it was enough to make nick, matt, and nate stop in their tracks. chris hesitantly presses play on the recording, holding the phone to his ear has his glossy eyes remain glued to the tv screen in front of him.
"hi, chris.
before i got on this plane, i sensed this weird feeling that i can't really explain for some reason. originally i was gonna facetime the groupchat when i landed, but then i looked over to my sweet older lady friend next to me, and she was writing her will. and it made me realize tomorrow isn't promised so if i don't say something now, you might never know it.
i love you, chris. more than you'll ever know, and not in the way of just friends. i'm in love with you, and i have been since we were kids. i'm not sure that i always did a good job at hiding it, since nick and nate used to tease me about it for the longest. matt would too, but he was definitely understanding about it. they were always telling me that i needed to confess to you, but i was too scared to ruin our friendship and lose you altogether. and besides, i'm almost certain that the way you loved me was strictly platonic. i want you to know that i would never get mad at you for not reciprocating it, because you can't force what you don't feel.
if by a miracle though you did feel the same at some point, i understand how difficult i probably made it for you to want to express your feelings to me. i've always been extremely happy for you and your past girlfriends because even if it wasn't with me, one thing i always wanted was for you to be happy, no matter what. i'm so thankful to have you as my best friend, and i wouldn't trade you for the world. even if i have to do it in silence, i will be in love with you till i die, and even after.
mon amour, je suis tellement désolée merci de me faire sentir aimée je sais que j'ai besoin de toi je t'aime pour toujours je promets que ce n'est pas un au revoir
i'll see you later, chris."
( lilly's section 💌 )
this is my sign to stop listening to plane to paris on repeat😭🙏 but i absolutely love nessa DOWNNN so yeah. i really hope y'all liked this fic ! muah, i love you all always. 💌
@luverboychris @muwapsturniolo @mrssturnioloo @mattsturniolosleftnut @sturnprime @thenickgirl @guccifrog @nickgetsmewetter @eyeliketoeatpoosay @e1ias3 @sp3aknaur @middlepartmatt @summerssover @riasturns @sturn777 @l0akkzz @hysteria-things @pinksturniolo @chrissturniolossidehoe @chris-slut @hoesformatt @raysmayhem-72 @lanas-doll @chrisssluttywaist @mbbsgf @jetaimevous @chaossturns @cottoncandyswisherz @oliviasturniolo21
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one-flower-one-sword · 5 months ago
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Hello I have a question everyone is going on about Hua Cheng hating Feng Xin despite being loyal to Xie Lian. What do you think of the reason Hua Cheng hatred towards Feng Xin?
Hey Anon! thank you for your question, I'll do my best to answer it :)
First of all, I think it's important to keep in mind that Hua Cheng has reasons to hate Feng Xin outside of his treatment of Xie Lian. Though out of the two, Mu Qing treated Hong Hong-er the worst - arguing that a visibly starved and abused child was lying about having no one caring for him and then later kicking him out of the army out of jealousy - Feng Xin really wasn't much better:
The young child shook his head, but Mu Qing said, “There must be. If he doesn't go back, his family will surely be worried sick looking for him.”
“No, no way! There's nobody!” that young child cried, sounding like he was afraid to be sent back, and he opened his arms reaching for Xie Lian. He was still covered with mud and blood, and Feng Xin couldn't stand it anymore.
“What're ya doin’, kid? Things were urgent earlier, so whatever, but shouldn't you know better by now? This is the crown prince. His Highness the Crown Prince. Do you understand?”
That young child's arms immediately shrank back, but he was still gazing at Xie Lian.
Vol 2, page 362
We see this treatment of Hua Cheng continue all the way to the reveal in Mount Tonglu's caves: because of what Hua Cheng is - a beggar child, a ghost king - he shouldn't be near Xie Lian - a crown prince, a god - and his adoration for Xie Lian and desire to be near him is openly treated by Feng Xin as inappropriate and disgusting, as something Xie Lian needs to be “protected” from at all cost - if Xie Lian wants to or not.
After walking for a while, Feng Xin spoke up. “No. I still don't think Your Highness should hold a strange child for everyone to see.”
“What's the problem?” Xie Lian asked.
“You're the crown prince!” Feng Xin exclaimed. While he spoke, he saw a worn-down handcart further up the alley and said, “Put the kid in the cart and pull it.”
Mu Qing immediately voiced, “Just so we're clear, I will not pull that thing up the mountain.”
”No one's asking you to,” Feng Xin said. He reached out and yanked the child from Xie Lian's arms, and the child started struggling again.
Vol 2, page 364
Because Xie Lian is nobility, in Feng Xin's eyes he shouldn't be seen carrying a child of the lowest class. Keep in mind that it was Xie Lian's own decision to carry Hong Hong-er himself and that the child had repeatedly made clear it didn't want to be carried by anyone else. But Feng Xin still takes Hong Hong-er away from Xie Lian, the only person that the child feels safe with and is being treated well by. Not to mention that he's yanking a child around that he knows has recently been brutally beaten, with no apparent care for its injuries.
Once Mei Nianqing divines Hong-er's fate, Feng Xin treats him like everyone else does except for Xie Lian - as if he's not a human being but some kind of dangerous monster that Xie Lian shouldn't even touch:
The Deputy State Preceptors blocked Hong Hong-er, and the State Preceptor backed away, yelling, “Make him leave the mountain, hurry! Don't touch him, I mean it! That fortune is too toxic; don't touch him!” The Deputy State Preceptors hurriedly moved aside, and Mu Qing and Feng Xin didn't know whether to act.
Seeing that everyone was avoiding him like he was poisonous vermin, the child was shaken and started thrashing even harder, biting and screaming with all his might. “I'm not! I'm not!! I'M NOT!!!”
Suddenly, a pair of arms wrapped around his waist, encircling his small form. A voice came from above his head. “You're not. I know you're not. Don't cry, now. I know you're not.”
[...] A while later, the State Preceptor said, “I mean it. It's best if you let go.”
Feng Xin finally came to his senses and exclaimed, “Your Highness! Let go! Be careful of…”
Vol 2 page 380+ 382
So what we've established is that Feng Xin treated Hong Hong-er at best like a nuisance that Xie Lian shouldn't be seen caring for because of the class differences, and some kind of dangerous inhuman thing at worst. Now, since that was the way everyone but Xie Lian was treating him back then, I actually don't think it would stand out to Hua Cheng that much - but what would stand out to him was that Feng Xin, just like Mu Qing, repeatedly tried to separate him from Xie Lian, both through words and through actions, and that he went against Xie Lian's wishes in doing so.
Now we can tackle the other part of your question, Hua Cheng hating Feng Xin despite his being loyal to Xie Lian. And I think to answer it fully, we must first ask ourselves - was he loyal?
It's true that Feng Xin stayed with Xie Lian longer than Mu Qing did after the banishment, but his choices during that time tell their own story:
“Actually, it's… Your Highness, do you still have any money on you? Or something that can be pawned?”
Xie Lian was perplexed that he'd ask such a foolish question at a time like this. “Huh? Why do you ask?”
Feng Xin was sweating, but he replied boldly, “It's nothing… Just… If you happen to have some, can you… lend it to me?”
Xie Lian laughed bitterly. “Do you really think I have anything?”
Feng Xin sighed. “I didn't think so.”
After giving it some thought, Xie Lian asked, “Didn't I give you that golden belt?”
“That's not enough,” Feng Xin mumbled. “Far from it…”
Xie Lian was shocked. “Feng Xin? What exactly did you do? How could a golden belt not be enough to cover what you need? Did you beat someone up and need to pay them off? Tell me?”
Feng Xin came back to himself and quickly said, “Oh no! Don't take this to heart. I was only asking!”
Xie Lian pressed him over and over, but Feng Xin still swore everything was fine. Finally, Xie Lian said with worry, “Well, if there's anything, you must tell me. We can think of a solution together.”
“Don't worry about me,” Feng Xin said. “There's no way a solution will just fall from the sky. Your Highness, you just focus on solving your own problems.”
Vol 6, page 219
While superficially this might look like Feng Xin is trying not to burden Xie Lian with his problems, when we look at the actual context we realize that that's not why he is lying about what's going on. This is set during the time where they're barely managing to scrape enough food together not to starve, and are struggling to make enough money to buy medicine for Xie Lian's sick father. And Feng Xin knows this, knows that anything of value should go towards their continued survival - that's why he rejects Xie Lian's repeated offers of help and lies to him about there being no particular reason he's asking for money. Is that loyalty?
Soon after, he heard the Queen sigh. “If this keeps up, how will my son ever get better?”
Xie Lian could feel something amiss with those words, and Feng Xin replied in a quiet voice. “He's only like this because he's exhausted. Too much has happened lately. Will Your Majesties also keep a close eye on him? Please let me know as soon as possible if there's anything not right with His Highness, but don't tell him you did. Also avoid saying anything that might provoke him-”
Vol 6, page 220-221
Feng Xin told Xie Lian he believed him when he said that Bai WuXiang was back and was stalking him, but behind his back, it's a different story. Not only does he doubt Xie Lian’s grip on reality and his own mind, he urges Xie Lian's parents to also keep up the pretense and then report to Feng Xin behind Xie Lian's back. Is that loyalty?
And we need to keep in mind that this isn't a one time deal but a pattern of behavior that keeps repeating. Feng Xin keeps treating Xie Lian as too naive to be trusted to make his own choices, hence his trying to keep Xie Lian from caring for Hong Hong-er, trying to “manage” Xie Lian like an unruly child, and then all the way to conspiring with Mu Qing to kidnap Xie Lian away from Hua Cheng no matter what Xie Lian wants because they think they know better.
Xie Lian knelt by the stream and puked his guts out for over an hour, heaving until blood came up. After descending the mountain, he walked through the city for a long time, aimlessly wandering the main streets without a destination in mind. Suddenly, a hand gripped his shoulder and yanked him into an alley. Xie Lian looked around and saw an incoming fist before he even glimpsed the other's face.
“Where did you run off to for so long?!” Behind the fist was Feng Xin's furious expression, but by the time Xie Lian saw, he'd already been knocked to the ground by the punch. Feng Xin hadn't expected to knock him down so easily. Confused, he looked at his own fist, then at Xie Lian on the ground. Before he could think to help him up, Xie Lian had already crawled back up by himself.
Feng Xin's face changed, but in the end, his temper was still flaring. “You've got such an attitude! Dropping only a word before running away and disappearing for two months! Do you know how worried Their Majesties have been?!”
Vol 6, page 263
This is after Xie Lian ran away when he found out Feng Xin didn't believe him and was then lured to the abandoned temple by Bai WuXiang and severely tortured and violated. He was obviously not alright when he left and just from the fact that he disappeared for that long it should be obvious that something is seriously wrong - yet Feng Xin doesn't care about finding out, he's so angry at the way Xie Lian is “failing” to be the perfect image he's made up in his head that the moment he sees him again, he punches him in the face. Is that loyalty?
“Why are you being like this? When did you become this way?” Feng Xin mumbled. “I… I really don't know… I'm… Why did I follow you all this time - ?”
“Then stop following,” Xie Lian said.
Feng Xin couldn't wrap his head around that. “What?”
“I said, don't follow me anymore,” Xie Lian repeated. Then he slammed the door.
Four hours later, there was finally some rustling outside the room and low voices speaking. It seemed Feng Xin was bidding farewell to Xie Lian's mother and father. Feng Xin's voice was extremely low, the queen's voice was choked with sobs, and the king didn't say much, but there was a lot of coughing. The door opened a moment later, then closed. Feng Xin's voice vanished, and the sound of his footsteps grew more and more distant. Feng Xin had left.
[...] Before Feng Xin had left, Xie Lian had been afraid. Now that Feng Xin was gone, he wasn't scared anymore. But even though he no longer felt fear, he felt a deeper agony. Xie Lian had initially held a one-in-a-million bit of hope at the bottom of his heart. He'd hoped that Feng Xin would still stay even if Xie Lian admitted he had done things he shouldn't have, even if he became the worst version of himself. After all, the two had never left each other's side since he turned fourteen and Feng Xin was selected to be his personal attendant. They were master and servant, but more than that, they were friends. And Feng Xin had no one to care for aside from the crown prince either - or, at most, him, and the king and queen. But Feng Xin had really left.
Vol 6, page 273-274
And finally, as Xie Lian begins to crack under the weight of his trauma, Feng Xin leaves. Is that loyalty? Or, more precisely, we have to ask ourselves - who was it that Feng Xin used to be loyal to? Because from what we've seen, it was less Xie Lian the person and more the perfect image of a crown prince and a god Feng Xin wanted and repeatedly tried to force Xie Lian to be - a crown prince who doesn't behave inappropriately by carrying beggar children, who doesn't go against the orders of his Shifu, a perfect god who never falters and doesn't show mental or physical strain no matter what he goes through.
Xie Lian stopped eating and said gently, “But I can sort of understand… your feelings.” After a pause, he continued, “There was a period in my own life that wasn't easy. Back then, I'd always think about how wonderful it would be if someone could still love me for who I was, even if they saw me rolling in the dirt and couldn't get up. Though I don't know if there's anyone out there like that. And I'm scared of showing that part of myself too. But if it's someone San Lang yearns for… I think that even if they saw you at your worst, they wouldn't say something like, ‘ah, you're not so great after all'”.
His face grew solemn. “To me, the one basking in infinite glory is you; the one fallen from grace is also you. What matters is you, not the state of you. [...]”
Vol 4, page 182
This is why ‘what matters is you, not the state of you” is the foundation of Xie Lian and Hua Cheng’s love - they love each other for who the other is, not who they could be or should be by any given standard.
Now, someone might say this is all well and good but Hua Cheng wasn't present for the above scenes with Feng Xin and Xie Lian, so those can't be reasons for him to hate Feng Xin. To which I would say, 1. the above examination was about questioning whether Feng Xin really was as loyal to Xie Lian as that discourse seems to insist by looking at what the text actually tells us. And 2., Hua Cheng did encounter Xie Lian several times during his first banishment. And every single time, Xie Lian was alone, in increasingly bad mental and physical states, with no one helping or caring for him.
The first time they meet again, after Mu Qing has just left Xie Lian and Hua Cheng is a ghost fire:
“I won't forget. Your Highness, I am forever your most devoted believer.”
Xie Lian forced down a sob. “...I've already lost all my believers. Believing in me won't do you any good; it might even bring disaster. Did you know? Even my friend has left me.”
The nameless ghost declared as if swearing an oath, “I won't.”
“You will,” Xie Lian said.
The ghost was insistent. “Believe me, Your Highness.”
“I don't,” Xie Lian said. He no longer believed in anyone, especially himself.
Vol 6, page 136-137
After the failed robbery attempt, when Xie Lian gets drunk and falls into a grave:
“God fucking dammit!” He slapped the ground and yelled, “Is anyone there? Is there anyone who can help pull me out?!”
Of course there wasn't anyone. There was only a small ball of haunting ghost fire, blazing unceasingly as it flitted about. After Xie Lian fell into the pit, the ball of ghost fire rushed over, seeming to want to pull him up - but it would never be able to touch him.
Vol 6, page 175
When the group of heavenly officials and Mu Qing drive Xie Lian off the blessed land and Hua Cheng can't help him because he's still a ghost fire:
Xie Lian lay sprawled face-down on the ground in a state of disbelief, his eyes bulging. One of the heavenly officials had shoved him while he was standing there at a loss and made him take that hideous fall in front of so many eyes. It was too humiliating. There were voices all around Xie Lian, high and low, filling the air and invading Xie Lian's ears. He stared with eyes that couldn't be wider at the blackened ground in front of his nose, then he slowly raised his head.
Mu Qing was standing not too far away from him - standing among those heavenly officials, his head turned away, not looking at Xie Lian. Just like the rest of them, he had no intention of lending Xie Lian a hand to help him up. And thus, Xie Lian understood. No one would lend him a hand to help him up.
Vol 6, page 196
When Xie Lian is brutally tortured and violated by being stabbed over and over:
Unwilling to consider this any further, Xie Lian couldn't help but cry out. “Hel-”
Before the phrase “Help me” could leave his throat, the same icy black belt was thrust into his body once again. Xie Lian's eyes widened in horror. The razor-sharp sword was stabbed in, then pulled out. The next person followed without wasting a second, and the next stab was shoved into practically the same spot. The sound locked in Xie Lian's throat finally broke free, and a long, painful scream tore through his entire body.
Vol 6, page 255
And it doesn't stop there - Feng Xin and Mu Qing both ascend again while Xie Lian is lost in the mortal realm, and Hua Cheng is the only one looking for him. That Feng Xin spent so much time in the mortal realm because he was searching for Xie Lian appears to be entirely fanon, as I cannot recall a single instance where the text actually suggests this. And then when Xie Lian ascends for a third time, Feng Xin and Mu Qing are too cowardly to face him, and only seek him out in disguise. And again, they repeatedly try to separate Hua Cheng from Xie Lian:
After a moment, Feng Xin turned to Xie Lian. “If there's nothing else, you’d better hurry back to the Heavenly Court. Many of the heavenly officials have no idea what happened in that ruckus, and they're still waiting for news above. Jun Wu should have been informed by now. You need to report back and give them a proper account.”
Hua Cheng laughed out loud at his words.
“What're you laughing at?” Feng Xin demanded.
“And here I was marveling at how straightforward you are, but it turns out you like beating around the bush too,” Hua Cheng said. “You just don't want His Highness to associate with the likes of demons and ghosts like me, so why not say so openly? Think it's not your place?”
Xie Lian cleared his throat softly. “San Lang…”
“As long as you're aware that he shouldn't be associating with the likes of demons and ghosts,” Feng Xin said coldly.
Vol 2, page 261-262
So, to sum up, when we look at all this from Hua Cheng's perspective - why wouldn't he hate Feng Xin? He's had zero positive interactions with the man, repeatedly witnessed him going against Xie Lian's wishes, and had Feng Xin try and separate him from Xie Lian over and over again. From Hua Cheng's perspective, Feng Xin abandoned Xie Lian to his suffering and forgot about him, while Hua Cheng never wavered in his faith, and didn't give up on looking for Xie Lian even after hundreds of years.
Throughout the entire novel, Hua Cheng is the only one who consistently respects Xie Lian's autonomy - the only times he ever intervenes is when Xie Lian is about to do something that threatens his own physical and/or mental wellbeing. Many other characters, Feng Xin included, repeatedly ignore or even violate Xie Lian's autonomy and the novel makes quite clear how important and profound the distinction is between how Hua Cheng treats Xie Lian and how everyone else does:
Feng Xin glanced at him and couldn't help but say, “...I'm a little surprised.”
“What?” Hua Cheng replied, not turning or showing a single trace of curiosity.
Feng Xin scratched his head. “Since you're so biased against Mu Qing, I assumed you'd think he wasn't worth saving and wouldn't want His Highness rescuing him. I thought you'd prevent him from going.”
Only then did Hua Cheng spare him a glance. “Half-wrong, half-right.”
“Huh?”
“The first part isn't wrong - I certainly don't think he's worth saving,” Hua Cheng said. “I don't care if he lives or dies.”
“Isn't that a little too blunt?!” Seeing that apathetic expression made Feng Xin start to sweat; when he realized that this man definitely held the same attitude toward him, he sweat even harder!
Hua Cheng snorted, then after a pause, he added, “But only His Highness can decide what he wants to do. I will never oppose his decisions.”
“...” Feng Xin had never heard anyone say something like that before - not a man to a woman, and most definitely not one man to another. But he was quite sure that Xie Lian would only get all worked up and flustered again if he'd been here to hear it. “Ah… I see,” Feng Xin said, not knowing what face to make.
Vol 8, page 44-45
And just to make this clear - this is not me hating on Feng Xin. We also could probably all have lengthy but ultimately futile discussions on what loyalty personally means to each and every one of us, which is why when it comes to discourse like this I think we have to focus on what the text says. And I think through this examination it's become quite clear where the limits of Feng Xin's loyalty lay in relation to how it was tied less to Xie Lian the person and more to who he thought Xie Lian should be, and how even beyond Feng Xin's ultimate lack of loyalty Hua Cheng has many legitimate reasons to hate him in regards to how both he himself and Xie Lian were treated by Feng Xin.
Hope this answered your question!
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mrinafria · 1 month ago
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I'll gladly let you kill me then.
-That promise, make sure you keep it.
So I think Daon's backstory is significant for us to understand a bit more about Han Daon as a character. He's got this huge scar from his childhood incident that he never really healed from. Also, he's no saint. We've seen him wavering in what he should/should not do more than once so far.
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He knows giving police protection to criminals is a waste but still does it because it's the lawful thing to do. He wavers for a couple of seconds there when Kang Bitna offers to kill his parents' killer for him because the law cannot. From what I see, he's always walked on a thin line between what is right or wrong according to society's definition. He definitely has a violent streak in him; he's just never had to fully give in to that.
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You bet he'd have ended up on the dark side after his parents' death if not for his noona who never gave up on him, turned him away, with her love and kindness, from a path that could have led him to darkness and uncertainty. Now that Detective Soyeong is gone, the person who showed him light is gone too. His only family after he'd lost his own, gone. And he's back to being that kid again who had so much unresolved hurt, trauma and angst against the law that didn't believe in him (a wound he still carries). Law that wasn't enough to give him his well-deserved justice. Back then, he had Soyeong who was a human and law abiding individual. Now, he has Kang Bitna aka Justitia, a demon who serves justice in her own way because she knows the human law is faulty. If Han Daon was guided to life and light back then because of Soyeong, would he then give in to death and darkness now, because he is already spiraling as it is and there's no one to bring him back to light?
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Why do I feel Kang Bitna actually wouldn't want that? It was different back when she'd stabbed him, but the switch is flipped now, and I think she'd care very much about Han Daon's future and fate. The way she goes 'HAN DAON!' and 'Then you'll end up in hell too' and stares at him like she doesn't recognize this version of Daon--I've replayed that scene far too many times.
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Because Bitna may say Daon's morality and tenacity to get to the truth is annoying, but I think she doesn't even know that she appreciates it, which is also why she gets so worked up every time she feels like Daon's faked his emotions or betrayed her with his words: she expects him to be on the side of truth and righteousness.
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Even though we see her supporting Daon in the precap for eps 9 and 10, she might go out of her way and even risk her own existence to keep Daon away from darkness later, because now if something happens to him, she'd be the first one to cry.
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A part of me also thinks Daon cannot go ALL the way with his revenge because he'd made a promise to Detective Soyeong to always be a detective first and do his job. It's his vengeance talking right now but once that wears off and reason kicks in, I don't think he'd want to kill somebody unlawfully, disrespecting the promise he made to his noona.
Or we could totally have a switch up with Bitna becoming the superego and Daon, the id. It'll be interesting to see if Bitna starts shifting gradually toward the 'unevil' side while helping Daon, having his back and protecting him. She might have to take Daon's life after all (deal with the Demon and all), but at a time when it'll hurt her THE MOST doing so. Maybe the power of Kylum can come to their rescue then, reviving Daon? It also makes me think if the 'Other Thing' you need for Kylum to work its divine magic is unconditional love/sacrificial love, where Bitna would have to willingly give up her life to revive Daon?
*cough* ^I take no responsibility for what I just said above thank you very much T-T
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wcbblife · 7 months ago
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Steps and Swishes
a/n: promise the next part will probably have more of the professional dancing lol
Word count: 2.3k
Warnings: none!
***
In moments like these, you can't help but appreciate your body's resilience, its unwavering stamina that carries you through the literal marathon of your day. But as you navigate this relentless sprint, you find yourself hoping there's still some fuel left in your tank when you reach the audition.
Waking up late was never part of the plan, especially not on a day when a crucial audition awaits. "Crap!" you mutter under your breath as you hastily exit your dorm room, clutching a piece of bread in one hand and your phone in the other. Each step is a stride toward salvaging what's left of your punctuality.
For the most part, things seem to be going smoothly as you dash towards the building. Until it’s not.
You wrench open the glass door of the lobby and dash into the elevator, heart pounding with each passing floor. Finally, as the doors slide open, you burst forth into a labyrinth of corridors, your destination painfully close. Or so you think.
Just when you believe the worst is behind you, you turn a corner and collide with an unexpected obstacle: a cascade of blonde hair and scalding coffee.
“Fuck!” The word rips from your lips as you stagger backward, the searing liquid seeping through your clothes. With trembling hands, you peel the wet fabric from your skin, eyes fixed on the ruinous stain spreading across your once pristine white shirt.
“Holy shit,” the figure mumbles, “I didn't mean that at all. Are you ok?”
A hand reaches out hesitantly towards your shirt, then freezes awkwardly in mid-air. It's the final straw.
Your gaze shoots up to meet the woman in front of you, ready to unleash a torrent of curses, but all words die on your tongue as you're confronted with wide, concerned eyes. Eyes that you know all too well, belonging to none other than Paige Bueckers.
Going to the same school as Paige Bueckers had never really stood out to you until today.
"I'm so sorry," Paige says, glancing down at your shirt, her hand still suspended awkwardly between you. Silence hangs heavy in the air. "I… I'll buy you a new one, I swear. Let me make it up to you."
In that moment, you realize that even if she were to buy you ten or twenty shirts, it wouldn't change the fact that you're about to miss your audition if you don't hurry. The inconvenience of the situation dawns on you in full force.
You let out an exasperated sigh, your gaze flicking from your stained shirt to Paige and back again. Then, once more, your eyes travel from her to your shirt. You can't help but notice how effortlessly chic and pristine her shirt appears compared to your own.
“Take off your shirt,” you deadpan without much consideration.
Paige's eyes widen further, resembling a deer caught in headlights. “W-what?” she stammers, inching away slowly.
You, however, couldn't care less if she looked at you as crazy. “You said you wanted to make it up to me?” you ask, raising an eyebrow before gesturing towards the bathroom behind her. “I have an audition in five minutes, and unless I want to blow my shot, I need to look presentable.”
The blonde hesitates, her gaze shifting between your outstretched fingers and the bathroom door. Then, with a slow turn of her head, you can almost hear the gears in her mind grinding to a halt. “And how does me taking off my shirt help you?”
“Just get in there and swap shirts with me,” you grumble, shooting her a soft glare. “It'll be quick. Once I'm done, you can have it back. Deal?” You silently pray she doesn't call the cops given how stupid and crazy you must sound, but the desperation in your eyes seems to sway her as she hesitantly nods.
“Alright, fine.” she sighs, walking towards the bathroom.
***
For the most part, the audition went relatively smoothly. Well, except for the fact that you received a barrage of odd looks for bursting in looking disheveled, with the invasive aroma of coffee clinging to you like a second skin. You could swear they caught whiffs of it every time you executed a dance move. But on the bright side, Paige's shirt did align nicely with the hip-hop theme they wanted, so hooray for small victories, you suppose.
Exiting the room, your shoulders sag immediately. Scanning the area for a familiar blonde, you finally spot Paige and make your way over, tapping her shoulder gently.
Startled, she quickly turns off her phone, giving you her full attention. “How'd it go?”
You shrug, not feeling up to sugarcoating it. “It was alright, I guess.”
Paige's expression deflates. “Gosh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to mess up your audition.”
“Nah, don't worry about it,” you try to brush it off, though your voice betrays a hint of frustration. “If I hadn't been such a klutz and actually woke up on time, I wouldn't have been in such a rush, and none of this would've happened.”
A brief silence lingers between you two before Paige breaks it. “Hey, let's make a deal,” she proposes, suddenly piquing your interest. “You can hang onto the shirt for now. I'll take this one,” she taps the stained area with her palm, “wash it, and give it back to you later.”
You raise an eyebrow. “Really? I'm totally fine with changing again. Why would you even let me take your shirt home—”
“Just…” she interrupts, sounding almost exasperated, “It's just a way for you to trust that I won't flake out and keep your shirt or something,” she mumbles, scratching the back of her neck nervously. “If you have my shirt, the only way I could get it back is by washing yours and swapping. I know it sounds silly.”
You chuckle. “Maybe just a little.”
Paige smiles, briefly averting her gaze before meeting your eyes again. “Just… let me clean it. I already feel bad enough.”
With a resigned sigh, you give in to her plea. “Fine, give me your number.”
Paige retrieves her phone with surprising speed, a wide grin spreading across her face. She clears her throat, opening her phone and displaying the number pad. “Are you usually around campus? You look like a student.”
After entering your number, you call yourself and retrieve your own phone as it starts to ring. “Yeah… I'm just looking for a part-time gig for now. Nothing too demanding.”
The blonde's interest is piqued. “So, what was the audition for?”
“Just some dancing,” you murmur, half-expecting her to burst into laughter like some others might. But instead, her reaction is one of genuine shock.
“That's awesome! KK would love you,” Paige jokes, and you audibly release a deep breath, grateful that there's no mockery in sight.
“I'm… flattered. Though I'm afraid she might work me to the bone with TikTok dances.”
Paige erupts into laughter, bending over in amusement before regaining her composure. “She might, but she means no harm, I promise,” she says, her expression turning more earnest. “You might have to swing by and show us some moves.”
“Hmm, I might just have to do that,” you reply with a smile.
Paige rubs her hands together awkwardly. “Well, I'll let you go. I don't want to hold you back any longer. I'll definitely text you.”
You nod, “I'll look forward to a white shirt”
She smiles before excusing herself. As you go about your way, you can't help but glance back, only to find the blonde has beaten you to it, snapping her eyes away from you in an instant.
***
The next morning breezes by in a blur. You manage your early classes and decide to take the afternoon off, indulging in a leisurely lounge session that rivals the pace of a sloth. Despite knowing you should probably get moving, the mere thought of tackling errands or practicing feels like an insurmountable task.
You flop onto your back on the carpeted floor, idly gazing at the ceiling until the tranquil silence is abruptly shattered by the muffled buzzing of your phone. With a lazy stretch, you reach for your phone, glancing at the notification.
One text message.
Sitting up, you unlock your phone.
‘Hey! It's Paige. You know, the girl who spilled coffee on you? Yeah, you probably remember that. Anyway… I cleaned your shirt, and I promise it's good as new. Do you want me to swing by your place or are you cool with coming over here?’
Your fingers move instinctively, typing a response before you even fully process it. After all, if THE Paige Bueckers was extending an invitation to her place, who were you to refuse?
‘I don't mind coming over there.’
Three bubbles appear in the corner of the screen.
‘Great! My room is 12C. Just drop by whenever you want.’
‘Alright, I'll be over in a few minutes.’
‘Perfect, I'll be waiting for you.’
You toss your phone aside, feeling an unexpected surge of energy coursing through you. Where it comes from, you're not entirely sure, but you're certainly not going to question it. Not when it propels you onto your feet in a heartbeat.
Without pausing to overthink, you head for a quick shower, ensuring you look somewhat presentable before getting dressed. There's a pitifully evident spring in your step as you make your way to her room, clutching her freshly washed shirt against your body.
However, all semblance of confidence evaporates upon coming face to face with the blue door, 12C stamped at the top. One. Two. Three seconds pass, and you find yourself rooted in place, your arm trembling slightly before dropping back down.
“Shit…” you mutter, suddenly feeling more self-conscious. But you gather your resolve and decide to just go for it.
Almost instantly, you hear shuffling from behind the door, accompanied by distant thuds before it creaks open. Two brown eyes peer out, catching you off guard. You barely have time to process before she gasps, almost comically.
“Oh my god, you're the coffee girl, aren't you?” The girl, whom you now recognize as KK, swings the door open wider, smiling like a child.
“Um… yeah, that's me,” you reply, scratching the back of your neck and holding up Paige's shirt. “I'm just here for a simple exchange.”
“Girl, come on in,” KK drawls, gesturing for you to enter. “She's down the hall to the left.”
“Thanks,” you chuckle.
It's pretty wild how much they're trusting you, but at this point, does it even matter?
You make your way down to what you presume is Paige’s room, rapping lightly on the door.
Paige answers swiftly, her attention seemingly elsewhere. “Kk, I swear to go—” Her gaze lands on you, and her eyes widen abruptly, words faltering. “Oh, my bad. Thought you were that airhead.”
“Hey!” Kk's voice rings out from the other side of the dorm, prompting a giggle from you.
“Come in, come in. I didn’t realize you were here already,” Paige says, opening her door fully. She strides over to her bed, where a neatly folded white shirt rests on top.
“I like your cologne,” you blurt out before even thinking, immediately regretting your lack of filter. You scramble for an excuse as Paige turns to you, her expression unreadable. “I-I mean, your shirt… I'm assuming it was your cologne. It smelled nice.”
She smiles. “Really? I’m trying something new. Must've smelled better than the coffee, huh?”
You step closer to her, the distance between you diminishing. “Anything would be better than that, to be honest. Imagine dancing while drenched in coffee.”
Paige winces, stepping nearer to you. She extends your shirt towards you. “Yeah, sorry about that again. But don't worry, I made sure it was all gone.”
Taking a moment to really take her in, you absorb every detail you may have missed in your earlier rushed encounter. The way her eyes sparkle, the curve of her smile, the subtle flex of her arms. It's almost overwhelming for your heart to handle.
“Here. I washed yours too.”
“Aww, you didn't have to,” she reply with a cheeky grin. “Now I owe you again.”
“I'm always up for some food,” you shrug, though you don't really mean it. “A broke college student will take what they can get.”
“Deal,” Paige says, her tone shifting slightly more serious. “We could even go now if you want.”
“Wow, didn't expect you to actually say yes. I mean, aren't you like… a celebrity or something around here?” you comment, feeling a mix of surprise and flattery.
Paige shrugs, a smirk playing on her lips. “What, are you worried they'll mistake us for a couple or something?”
“W-what? No…” you stutter, feeling your cheeks flush at the mere suggestion.
“I'm just messing,” she says, turning her head expectantly, her gaze soft yet playful.
It seems to effortlessly dismantle whatever defenses you had put up. “Fine,” you relent, smiling as Paige's face instantly lights up.
“Sweet. Hold on, let me grab my stuff,” she says, brushing past you, leaving you standing awkwardly in the middle of her room. You shift on the balls of your feet until…
“Psst!” Your head snaps towards the doorway as KK looks positively gleeful, biting her finger to stifle a laugh. “You're still gonna dance with me, right? Don't go flaking out.”
“Of course I am. And I’m going to beat you with all those TikTok dances,” you retort, a playful spark between the two of you.
KK gasps dramatically, clutching her shirt. “As if!”
“Alright, KK,” Paige interjects, returning from wherever she went, patting KK on the shoulder with a tad too much strength, causing the smaller guard to wince. “That’s enough.”
You catch the shift in Paige's tone, and she shrugs softly once she notices your gaze on her. “Let’s go?”
You nod and follow closely behind, but not before whispering a quick, “It's still on,” to KK, chuckling as her mouth hangs open in silent protest.
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yandere-kokeshi · 2 years ago
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yandere mw2 characters with a reader who tries running away? (price, ghost, and alejandro)
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Warning: punishments and angry boys.
A/N: hope you enjoy :]!
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Captain “Price” John:
Less pleased about the incident. Cursing out, throwing out his cigar before checking your location.
He's immediately right behind you, yelling your name while catching up to you; immediately grasping your shirt, pulling you onto his shoulder, and taking you back home from the long journey that you started.
Once at home, Price is staying calm, a type of unnerving calm that's extremely uncomfortable. He's sent you to your room, like a child, and doesn't come in till he calms down to talk to you.
— "Why can't you see that I need to protect you?" He asked sternly, arms crossed against his chest as he looks at you sitting on the bed.
You stayed silent — like you always did. You heard him sigh before feeling the weight next to you deepen, signaling he was right next to you. "I just want to protect you. This is for your greater good. I don't want to do the extra mile with you, but if I have to. I will."
His reaction is very... dad like. While he does forgive you, he will not let you get away with it without consequences.
The 'extra mile' is stripping your privacy and removing your social life, completely.
That means that you won't be able to contact any of your friends, family, or simply anyone you enjoy time with. As well as for privacy, you won't be allowed to be alone for more than 2 minutes; having him constantly following you like some type of guard dog.
Need to make yourself breakfast? Let him do it. He's better at cooking; plus, you might hurt youself. Want to watch TV? Sure, just let him sit beside you. Want to head out and do a run? Maybe, depends on the weather. Even then, he's coming along.
While Price is easy to forgive, it doesn't mean he forgets. If the two of you get into a fight, he will bring it back up and threaten you with it. Possibly, add that he should've done more.
Although, the worse he will do is chain you to the bed. Possibly take away any electronics and things that bring you joy (ex: reading books, sleeping with stuffed animals, eating sweets, etc.)
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Simon “Ghost” Riley:
Expected it. Already thought it through, he's already ahead of you, chasing you down with his swift moves. He's efficient to know exactly where you are. The minute you think he's away, he's right behind you, a strong hand against your lower back as he carries you back to the shared home.
At first, he's angry — upset that you would thrash and run off when he has to protect you. But, after realizing that yelling was not doing so well; he was forced to put himself in your shoes.
I mean... waking up in a random bed, in the middle of nowhere, and somebody you thought you could trust; it's a big deal to process.
That being said, he will leave you alone, then come back with dinner an hour later. Sitting down in the bedroom with you and looking at you with a intense look.
— "Look, you don't have to speak. That's fine. Just let me talk." He stated, grabbing a chair and scooting it closer to the bed, sitting on it with a sigh and a few pops coming from his knees:
"I understand you're upset. But I need you to understand I'm doing this to protect you. For this reason, because of what happened today, I'll need to some change things."
His reaction is more... stricter after this incident.
The 'change' around the house consists of him being too over your shoulder; stripping your privacy by 90%.
Being in the bathroom for more than 5 minutes? He's knocking on the door, asking if things are fine. Want to go outside? Sure, but he has to be with you. Showering alone? Yeah, no. He's either joining you (with consent) or staying the in bedroom to watch you.
All the windows and doors are placed under severe locks, and some of them are insanely protected to the point its almost bolted shut.
At night, his grip around you is much tighter. He's always staying up later, watching you as you read books in bed or TV, whichever one you prefer. He'll try to strike up a conversation, watching your body language and skills.
While he is mad, he won't hold it up against you. Ghost would rather forget about it and move on. That doesn't mean he forgets. If this does happen again, the consequences are not lighter, rather semi-harsher.
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Alejandro “Colonel” Vargas:
Stunned and displeased. At first, he was shocked; he thought you didn't have the guts. But, what did he know?
Much like the others, he's completely onto you. A trained soldier who's much faster than you. He's catching up with you, like a game of cat and mouse that's about to end.
In a second, you're caught in his hold, and quickly pulls you into a forced hug. him insisting that you need to calm down.
Sure, he's angry — you could've gotten hurt. Or worse. But, he hides it; doesn't show it to scare you or make the situation worse than it is.
Immediately, he's giving you space. He's going outside, leaving you alone in the house to think it through before approaching you with your favorite food and drink.
— "I understand you're scared, I know you're confused, mi amor. I do." He stated, crouching in front of you with his hands surrendering in a 'peace offering'.
He looked at you, watching your lip tremble with uncertainty. He reached over and grasped your hand, watching your body language before continuing to talk.
"But you don't have to be. I'm not gonna hurt you, okay? What you did today, isn't your fault."
While he does blame the two of you, he mostly blames himself. Much like Ghost, he forced himself into your shoes; witnessing your confusion and uncertainty about the situation.
His reaction is guilty, and anger. They're both portrayed as him, he's upset at himself for not showing you he's not capable of protecting and loving you. While his reaction is more different from the others, he's more concerned about your opinion of him.
Though, he will do extra things to make this doesn't happen again. He'll have Rudy come over more, and have cameras set outside. Specifically in the entry and exit areas.
Certain windows and doors are bolted shut. The doors he and Rudy come in have certain locks and passcodes.
Just like the others, he will be more observant and coddled around you. If you decide to cook, he has to be in the same room or participate in it. Wanna head outside and shop? Sure, just don't shove his hands around your lower waist or back. Let it stay where he wants to put it.
During the night, he makes sure to hold your hand and cover you more. Kissing you and showing you he's not a threat. Buying you things and spoiling you more than he should. But, you deserve it.
Although, he will give hints that the next time you do this, he will make sure everything will be a bit more difficult.
Masterlist || Please consider reblogging and commenting instead of liking. Stay well!
Do not plagiarize, repost, modify, translate or copy my work.
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jackrabbit-fandom · 6 months ago
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Boothill backstory spoilers, so if you dont wanna be spoiled scroll on
This is mostly comfort/fluff mabye tiny angst due to his backstory
Yes, it will include some relationship bits cause of course
Boothill, where his daughter survives, which, yes, i understand, would probably mean he doesn't become 'boothill', but let's pretend he does for the sake of the story. Also im goin with the name cherry for her cause i think its pretty cute
These kinda imply that it's been a few years between boothills' story and penacony
Edit: apparently the va names her clementine, which is adorable. I'll keep cherry in this one as it is but from now on she'll be clementine
Mabye he was able to save her, and in the process, his body got damaged bad enough that he had to replace it. In this situation, it would be more so because he was hurt so badly he nearly died but didn't wanna leave his daughter.
He'd likely want to keep her as safe as possible but still ended up becoming a space ranger anyway due to sharing the ideologies, but for the first few years of her life, he likely ether stays out of trouble as much as possible or has a safe house for her when he absolutely can not take her with him. On the missions where he does carry her along when she's fairly young, he's just got her attached to a baby sling on his chest. Though i dont see that being extremely common, he doesn't want to risk even a 0.0000000001% chance of her getting hurt
Imagine being intimidated by this cyborg man with a baby sling....anyway
Once she gets older, she's more steady with her walking, she's talking in full sentences, and finally, tall enough to reach his hip, hed likely start teaching her to use a gun.
It's a very serious moment due to how important he thinks it is for her to be able to defend herself when he can't be around. Hed likely has a target set up as he knelt behind her, helping her hold it and aim.
'Keep your breathing steady, don't close both eyes it puts your aim off, keep your elbows loose, respect the gun but don't fear it'
He knows he's going to have to get to work getting his revenge for the rest of his family, so he can't keep coddling her so teaching her to use a gun, or disarm someone and fight hand to hand becomes his top priority. That's not to say he over works her or forces her when she's tired, that's still his little girl, so when she's tired from training he makes sure she gets plenty of rest.
As much as being prepared is important, being well rested and happy is too.
On to more domestic and sweet ones, i donno if he'd have his own ship or just have some safe house on some random planet, but either way coming home to seeing his little girl happy healthy and alive is probably his favorite part of the day, the big bad gunslinger persona immediately melts away and he goes straight into silly annoying dad mode.
This means he has a million dad jokes to make poor cherrys eyes roll out of her head. Though I'd imagine she'd end up just like him, funny phrases, stupid jokes, and a bit of an attitude.
Once she's plenty old enough, say around 16 or so, and wants to go out on more dangerous missions with her dad, i think she would follow the path of abundance. Shed likely wants to protect others like her dad does, plus it's pretty helpful when your father is a cowboy who runs around getting into trouble. It does help put boothill at ease as well, seeing as she can heal herself if she gets hurt....as if he'd ever let that happen.
I'd think that for a while, he's more focused on his daughter rather than finding a partner, however were he to meet you at some point when cherry was fairly young one thing that would likely make him interested is you acting kindly towards her and cooing over her. Showing positive interest in his daughter is a pretty good way to get on his good side. Doesn't quite mean he'll trust you just yet. it just means you're on good terms with him.
I feel like he'd have to trust you pretty well before he lets you watch his daughter. She is his pride and joy, and his one most important person in his life. he almost lost her, and he won't risk someone trying to take her from him again.
However, once cherry is older and can, for the most part, care for herself without her papa watching over her, then hed show more interest. If you were there sense she was young and helped him care for her, he likely already started liking you early on but just didn't make a mood due to focusing on her. Due to you being closer to her in this situation, i can imagine her calling you her mom/dad/parent, too. Extra brownie points!
I imagine cherry being, like i said, like her dad. A bit goofy at times with weird phrases and a slight attitude, and growing up with his censor shed likely copy that too, yelling out "fudge!" When she stubs her toe. I can see her having an interest towards guns sense it was something her papa introduced her to it but also music. Hed likely have taught her guitar by this point so shed probably make up her own little songs and sing them to him (and you once you join the little family) and no matter if their bad or good hes always just happy to hear her sing with the biggest smile on his face, and you best be too.
Oh, and of course, shed get her own cowboy hat, but choose to keep stealing his anyway.
Overall, if she had survived, i imagine him being mostly the same, just with a little girl following him around.
If you liked the fic, feel free to give me requests around this au. I just need this motherfudger to be happy, please.
Edit: @legalize-arson gave me the name idea. I do not like not crediting
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avenging-fandoms · 10 months ago
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its the way i wanna have a matching tattoo with harry LMFAO god that'd be so cute
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i got a tattoo on sunday so i feel v passionate about this (a matching one at that!)
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“Are you sure you want to do this, Harry? This is permanent, forever and ever on you.”
Harry held his fiancé’s face and pecked your lips softly. “Well it’s a good thing I’m marrying you to be my wife forever and ever. I want to do this.” You lock fingers with Harry’s and kiss him softly.
Harry had a tattoo artist that came to the house and let you two get one wherever. Harry came outside with his guitar, sitting across from you and putting his feet on your chair next to your knees.
He started to play and hummed, that turned into mumble singing. “Hello?” Carrie called and you smile.
“Back here!” You lightly jog over and open the gate, greeting the tattoo artist with a hug and smile. Harry does the same, showing her where to set up. You all sat in your seats and Carrie added the stencil to the top of your ring finger.
“Got anything new, Harry?” Carrie asks, nodding towards his guitar and you smile at him.
“I’ll play you the one I wrote for my girl recently.” Carrie winked at you and you still blush like you two just met. He sang louder over the tattoo gun, neither Carrie or you mind. The tattoo was finished after 2 songs and you beam.
"Well, what do you think?" You ask, holding your hand out to Harry and his mouth closes. "Do you not like it?" You ask worrisome.
"Oh no, darling. Fuck, I love it, wait," He rests your fingers flat in his hands and takes pictures of the 'H' on your finger. "My turn." You kiss him a few times before he stands and sits in the tattoo chair. He got your initial tattoo on his ring finger.
Carrie finishes quickly and you gasp dramatically, holding a hand over your chest. "Oh my God! You're stuck with me forever." You smile and go over to where he stood, kissing him passionately.
"Harry?" Carrie said and he sat back down. "Actually, I think we'll have to take this inside." She suggests and you furrow your eyebrows.
"You're right. Honey, can you get a few things from Target please, maybe some food as well?" Harry pulls out his card and gives it to you. You narrow your eyes and take the card slowly.
"You're not about to cheat on me and bribing me with free reign in Target, are you?" You ask suspiciously and they both laugh.
"No, my love."
"Yeah, no worries girl, I'm not into people like Harry." Carries smiles and you nod with a little chuckle and blush from embarrassment.
"I'm so sorry.. I'll- yeah." You grab your things and leave.
You play your music and admire your new tattoo on your finger as your hand rests on the steering wheel. You go to Target and Harry texts you things he needs, the house needs, and ends the messages with, "And, of course, Whatever you want to buy. No is not in yours or mine's vocabulary. I love you peach."
You enter the store with a headphone in, grabbing a cart and putting your purse in the seat. You try to go towards the aisles of the things you need, but you got distracted. Clothes, bags, you were in heaven.
A long while later and a near cart full of stuff, you finally got what Harry needs and check out. You bring all the bags to the car and put it in the trunk, putting your cart in the corral because you're not an asshole.
You get in the car and pick up the food Harry ordered for the 2 of you, Carrie not wanting anything. You head home and Carrie was packing up her car as you pull into the driveway.
"Hey! Back just in time!" You smile and she closes her passenger door. "Do you need any bags in?" She offers and you wave your hand.
"Oh stop! You drive all the way to tattoo us and you want to also bring these bags in?" You two laugh. "No, thank you. I really appreciate it." She nods and we hug goodbye. You back into the garage and close the door once she leaves. "Harry? What did you-" He comes around the corner shirtless and your eyes land under his belly button, between his ferns; your birth flower. "Harry.."
Your voice was barely a whisper and you almost drop the food. You put all of your stuff on the counter and walk over to him, falling on your knees in front of him. Your hands held his thighs, his fingers combing through your hair as you look up at him. "You did this for me?" You ask as your eyes stay on his, lips dragging against the fern and stopping before the new tattoo.
"For only you." Harry gripped your chin and you smile, standing up and kissing him hungrily.
"Fuck, Harry." You mumble against his lips, gripping his hair.
"I love you so much, peach." You kiss him again and turn around, heading to the door that leads to the garage and his hand touches your back. "I can't wait to see you bought."
-
Your tattoos had finally healed and you now shared them with everyone on social media, Carrie respecting your guys' wishes of posting her shots of your tattoos until you guys did.
Harry wanted to post a picture of my birth flower, so you put your hand underneath the flowers as he took the picture, your fingers running over it and scratching it softly. "Naughty naughty." He teases, finger under your chin as he sits up to kiss you.
"I love this tattoo." You hum and kiss the flower gently, earning a groan from Harry's lips. His fingers comb through your hair and you kiss every line of the tattoos on his hips.
"Fuck, honey." You smile and crawl towards him, moving your face against his, nose brushing along the bridge of his.
"I love youu.." You sing and kiss the apple of his cheeks.
"I love you, my sweet girl." He held your jaw with both hands and kisses you, rolling on top of you.
"You have to get ready, Mr. Styles." You kiss him softly and sit up, running your hands up and down his chest, stopping at the tattoo and looking up at him. "What time do you have to be there?" You ask with your lips dragging down the skin on his neck.
Harry's fingers grip your thighs and you let out a whimper. "Whenever I fucking get there, they can wait."
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adelheidvonschicksal · 7 months ago
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hiii!! how are you? god, it's my first time requesting and I'm super awkward but I've been kinda having this dark mc brain rot! what would the love and Deepspace boys do with a secret gambler mc who's just like yumeko jabami? that'd be so interesting! feel free to ignore this ask if that makes you uncomfortable and have a nice day!
🎲 LND Scenarios with Dark Gambler!MC
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🎲 Synopsis: Love and Deepspace men dealing with their dark gambler partner's eccentrics.
🎲 Pairing: LND x GN!Reader
🎲 Content Warning: sexual undertones, mild humor, no pronouns/looks mentioned (Jabami is for the aesthetic), Zayne is the only one vibing, there's no mercy in kitty cards!
🎲 A/N: Thanks for letting me take a crack at your request. I never watched Kakeguri but I think I got the vibe! I did tone the behavior down a little to fit LND more but I think you'll be satisfied. Zayne's part turned into my favorite even though I had the hardest time thinking of a scene for him!
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“Let me have a turn.”
Xavier shudders at the dark aura he senses behind him despite the sweet smile plastered on your face. It’s almost like seeing a demon reflecting in the glass of the claw machine but in the form of an angel. He knew it was a bad idea to come to the arcade. He was no good at the machine no matter how much he tried and the nearly empty bowl where his tokens once laid was the proof.
“It’s alright. I didn’t think I could get it anyway. I’m not really good at this game.”
You frown at him. “It’s not you, love. These games are designed to cheat people out their money. It's disgusting really.”
Xavier gulps at that word. Cheat. If there was one thing you hated in this world, it was unfairness. The crooked smile forming on your face forces him to return eye contact with the special edition bunny plush he’s failed to get time and time again. Somehow, he sees fear in its eyes.
“I’ll get it for you.” Your hand reaches into the coin bowl; each clink makes his throat tighten as you finally pull out one of the coins between your fingers. “That bunny will be coming home with us.”
Xavier knows there’s little he can do when you sound that determined. Luckily, you won the bunny in two attempts.
“Ta-da! A fluffy bunny for my fluffy bunny.”
A sense of relief washes over him when the round rabbit hits his hands. Maybe he was being overly paranoid. However, his relief is quickly buffed out by anxiety when he sees you place another coin in the machine. It’s only a few seconds before the chimes of the machine go off again. Then, you pass him another toy, a carrot this time.
“Every bunny needs a snack!” you coo, but your tone carries that familiar edge that makes the hair on the back of his neck stand. “Now, whom shall we capture next?”
To Xavier, it sounds less like a question and more like a decree of war. “I think these two are more than enough for today."
“Xavier, this game stole forty dollars from you. I’m not going to let it get away with that,” you declare, proving it was just as he feared as your voice lowers. “Now, which one do you want, dear? Oh, I know, I'll just win them all for you! How does that sound?" you ask, but Xavier is eerily aware that it won’t matter what he says when you’re like this.
“Here we go!” you mewl as the claw begins to whir up.
Ignoring the shiver that climbs up his spine when your voice drips with the venom of ecstasy, there’s little Xavier can do but take another step back, buy another bowl of coins, and hold them for you as the role of a supportive boyfriend.
It’s an hour later when he finds himself surrounded by plushies, much more than he can hold, and the fear that you’re going to get kicked out the arcade any second.
“Cleaned out again!” you announce with a shrill breathy gasp, the giggle you give reminding him of the maniacal laughter Lemonette chortles out whenever the wanderer sprays lemon juice in his eyes. “Tell the employees we need another refill.”
“We don't have enough hands to carry all the ones you already won.”
“What?” Your focus finally breaks from the game and to the many toys scattered on the floor around him, overtaking his feet, then to the worried look on his face. “I went overboard again, didn’t I?”
Xavier sighs. “I think that’s pretty obvious.”
“Why didn’t you stop me?”
“How do you suggest I do that?” he asks with a shake of his head. “You’re impossible to stop.”
You flutter your eyelashes at him innocently. “I did get you your bunny though!”
“At the cost of the poor arcade owner’s precious sanity,” he reminds you but the smile on his face is less than scolding when he sees the guilty sulk you have and the lax of your shoulders. “Let’s find a donation center to drop these little guys off. We’ll count it as our good deed for the month.”
“Good idea! How about we surprise all the kids at the hospital?” you agree. Xavier chuckles. There’s the angel again.
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“Pretty please, Rafayel!”
The painter rolls his eyes, scooting further away from you to find a different spot on the floor to sit as you crawl after him. Rafayel turns his head away and strokes his paintbrush down the center of his canvas.
“No. Now, go away. Shoo. Shoo, go paw at someone else,” he says, waving the wet paintbrush at you.
“But no one else will play with me,” you whine.
“I wonder why?”
You are terrifying when you play kitty cards. Unfortunately, he was once the only one foolish enough to play with you because he wasn’t aware of how you got when you gambled even when the winnings were only a few pieces of chocolate. He knows better now. Despite your cute precious face, you were evil incarnate when it came to games.
“Surely, you pity me my dear sweet, gorgeous boyfriend. Did I forget to mention talented?” You give him the puppy eyes to try to wear down his resolve; your hand glides over his bangs, lovingly pushing them from his face. As much as he loves trying to make you happy, this is one of the few things in the world that he refuses to listen to you about.
“As true as all of that may be, I prefer living thanks,” he says before switching brushes to another color. A splash of blue would be excellent.
“Is this about last time?” you ask him. “It was an accident.”
“You nearly broke my hand!”
“You were trying to swap the kitties!” you yell back. Rafayel was a no-good cheater when it came to playing games and not the least bit sorry about it. It’s not your fault that you grabbed his hand by reflex nor that he was so dramatic about it.
“So, the sentence is hand breaking? That's cruel and unusual punishment!” he says with a gasp.
"Is it wrong to take away your tool for cheating?"
“Have you forgotten what I do for a living? You might as well lay me out in the sun to dry.”
Sighing, you decide to agree with him. You suppose you could be a little competitive when it came to games. Besides, they say it’s easier to catch more flies with honey. “Look, I’m sorry, baby,” you apologize and smooth out a hand over his thigh. “How about I give you a super special prize if you win.”
Rafayel barely looks at you from the corner of his eyes that slowly drop to where your hand rests on his leg. You’re on your hands and knees next to him, perched up like a cat begging to be petted.
“I’m listening,” he says, continuing to mix his paints. Purring, you lean in and whisper in his ear the prizes you’re willing to trade for him to play one little round with you.
His heart races with each word. It’s suddenly becoming harder to keep the stroke of the brush straight when your hand starts to trail further and further up his thigh. “Well, when you put it that way—” and he almost gives in until he sees the corner of your lips curling up into a smirk. “Wait. No. I refuse.”
“Not even if—” and you whisper in his ear again. He swears the brush handle will splinter if he grips it any tighter. His face is glowing a light red by the time you pull away. He might be Lumerian but he’s still a man; it’s difficult to bury the memories of pleasure under the memories of his fingers squeezing in your hard grip the last time you caught him cheating. He manages, somehow.
“How easy do you think I am? I’m not open for business whenever you want, darling.” He manages to spat out, not exactly the best rejection but it’ll suffice.
You puff up your cheeks at him. “You’re the meanest boyfriend ever!”
“And you’re evil when a card gets in your hand,” he argues back. The last thing he sees is the red of your shirt as you pounce on him and blue paint spilling across the floor.
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“You’re so nice, Zayne. You’re the only one who's brave enough to play against me.”
Zayne glances up from the stack of cards in his hands to catch your tongue glancing over your lips to wet them as you stare him down with dilated eyes. He expected you to get worked up but not quite this early into the game.
“I had the free time today.”
The real reason he schedules these regular games with you is to keep your strange habit under control, like providing a little bit of a drug to an addict; or in simpler terms, walking an overly energetic Husky so it won’t tear up the furniture. It beats the many times you ring him up at two in the morning, needing him to come rescue you out of a tough situation. He knows you’ll never learn your lesson with him always swooping in when needed, but he can’t stand the possibility of you getting hurt should he not come to your rescue every time you over bet your hand and need him to win back your money for you. The doctor never really expected to be a poker or kitty card expert at this age but alas.
“I’m guessing there’s at least one Kitty Plot in your hand, am I right?” you ask him; and he doesn’t understand how you sound more excited each time he obtains another assist card.
“And if I told you there was?”
The giggle you let out sounds much too vulgar for a simple game of kitty cards, but he’s used to this eccentricity of yours at this point. “Then that means I get to beat you even when you’re at your best!”
You slap down a Freeze card and Skip card. There’s not much he can do other than draw his assist card and ride out your next turn. In the next phase, you throw out another assist card, one that will allow you to restock your empty number stockpile and seal your victory.  
“Any last words?” you ask him. He can see that you’re starting to twitch with the excitement that comes from besting him. It’s the most dramatic thing he’s seen, but he’d be a liar to say it wasn’t…satisfying…to watch your face fill with shock as he blocks your finishing move with a Meow This. Maybe you were rubbing off on him after all, he muses.
“You held on to that all this time?” you ask him, recalling the many chances he could’ve blocked your earlier plays. You were aware he was luring you into a trap by playing the slow game, but you thought you could get around it this time. With a dreamy sigh, you cup your cheek in your hand. “I should’ve known. Just careless.”
“Any last words?” he asks, mocking your earlier victory line.
“None I’m afraid. I’m completely at your mercy; helpless in the face of your onslaught,” you tell him, and he ignores the little tilt of seduction lacing your voice and the squirming of your thighs as he starts erasing every point you’ve earned.
Slowly, your points decrease one by one as he throws out assist after assist while you let out little whimpers and mutter compliments under your breath with each cup color change and point reducer he throws out.
You’re going to lose! Again! He’s incredible as always.
But you’re offered deliverance when instead of erasing the six points of your blue kitty the cup color changes to match it. You hear Zayne “tch” under his breath, and you can’t help but laugh when he finally has to give up and fill the last white kitty cup with a pathetic low-level kitten.
In the end, you only won by two points but that was all you needed.
“I won…I won!” you repeat, rocking back and forth as you hug yourself and toss your head back. “I finally beat you! You won’t believe how long I waited for this day! Now what should my prize be?” You fall back onto the floor, kicking your feet. “It’s so hard to decide. I honestly didn’t think this day would come! There are so many things I’ve dreamed of making you do for me!”
Zayne presses his lips into a thin line as he begins to collect the kittens from the cup. “Calm down. You’re drooling on the carpet,” he exaggerates, not that you're in the right mind to listen.
“I got it. I know just what I want,” you squeal, holding your finger in your mouth to muffle your laughs. Zayne tenses when you sit up, much like a vampire from a horror movie, and lock eyes with him; he doesn’t think he’s felt so targeted since his days in the military.
“Meow for me, Zayne,” you demand, and his face burns at the ridiculousness of your request.
“You—”
“Are you backing out? That’s poor sportsmanship especially considering I took every nasty medicine each time you won.”
Zayne shakes his head. “No. I was simply thinking that’s surprisingly tame for you.”
You lift your eyebrows curiously. “So, does that mean?”
Zayne leans in over the table. In this position, he can see how your face softens from that lust-filled haze that gambling always manages to place over you. He doesn’t know if you can actually get embarrassed, but you certainly look flustered as he locks eyes with you.
“Meow.”
“Oh,” you gasp, eyes wide. “T-That was absolutely wonderful,” you blurt out with a clasp of your hands. “Do it again.”
“It was a one-time deal,” Zayne rejects before straightening his back.
“I didn’t think you would do it. One more little meow for me?” you plead. “This was a special victory, and I didn’t get to enjoy my winnings properly.”
“If you want to hear it again, I’m afraid you’ll have to beat me a second time,” he answers bluntly.
“And if you win?”
“You do what I want.”
“Which is?”
Zayne smirks at you. “All I can tell you is that I’ll ask for much more than a meow.”
“You’re on! You’re on! You’re on! What better way to solidify my position as the best kitty card player than with a streak?”
“I take it we’re playing on Hell Mode then.”
“What do you mean? It’s always heaven playing against you, Zayne. You’re the only one who can give an actual challenge,” you sweetly coo, nearly a moan. “Unfortunately, your reign will officially be coming to an end. I’m going to beat you without luck; and when I do, I think I’ll make you meow and purr for my reward.”
“Hurry and restart the match then if you believe that.”
Zayne watches as you excitedly set the game back up. He supposes that this type of gambling is more fun than gambling with chocolates. At least until he sees your social media message the next morning.
Guess who finally toppled the old king and became the new Ruler of Kitty Cards? I won’t name them. No one asked. It’s not polite to be a sore loser, my adorable meowing subject.
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not-goldy · 10 months ago
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Shout out to young JM who wanted Jk so bad it had him looking like a stage 3 clinger & shout out to Jk who has done everything in his power to keep that beautiful man once he had him & now a stage 6 clinger. Congrats. I keep thinking about when they were in NY the Megan BTB & how all those bags are sitting there & Jk instinctively grabs 2 and you see JM realizing Jk has his & doesn't have to get one, when the other members are holding theirs. SNIFFS. Its Jj carrying JM's bags & his shoes when they come off his feet. Rubbing his shoulders at any given point, cause one he wants to touch JM, but also knows JM is in pain all the time. Its him cooking the biggest pancake for JM & telling JM of course, you know I'll do it, when JM asked him to cook for him. Or only buying birthday presents for JM. Its him telling JM in front of the world, I'm your fan & hyping everything he does. Its him wanting to cut something cause he doesn't want JM's hand to get hurt or when Vmin were playing with a yoyo, it was JM who was given a lecture on Safety by Jk, about his fingers hurting & this is how accidents happen. Not a word when Tae was playing with it, but the minute JM gets it, his anxiety & boyfriending kicked in, just like when Tae was gonna flip his food & Jk said don't fling it at JM. Jk Coming after Suga with a Frying pan. Bulldozing RM out the way messing with JM. Physically moving Suga away from JM. Bulldozing past Tae to stand directly in front of JM & stare directly at him, when he was thanking Army for an award. Damn, he's just giving a TY speech, not accepting a nobel peace prize, Calm down. The way he guides JM walking up the steps or lets him walk ahead of him. The way he could hear the nervousness in JM's tone & he turns & nods and stares JM down giving his UN speech. Just reassuring JM with his little head nod, I'm here, beside you, you got this & if you notice it was when Jk turned to him when JM let out that deep breath/shudder & said sorry & had to shake it off. Just seeing JK's reassurance almost caused him to loose it. The way the others teased JM over it & Jk jumped to his defense, ready to take on all his Hyungs, but it was him in the end, who couldn't remember when he took a picture with Tae & said it was the day JM said sorry, it was all that stuck in his head. Every little detail he remembers. Even Jimin's grandma's birthday. There within 1 minute when JM called him on his bday live, dropping everyone. Even When he's missing JM he takes it public in front of millions and shows where his heart lies. Who owns his heart. Who he loves & doesn't care if he looks like a fool, as long as people know he's a fool in love. Look at how he chose the buddy system with JM, when he knew he had options & he & JM are complete opposites when it comes to thrill seeking. And how he has made himself look even more sus & clingy, by even saying anything about other branches (BTW his wants are valid and its very much okay if he wanted to do other things) but he still didn't go through with it & instead went through a timely process and enlisted with JM instead. Didn't even enlist on your own that would give you independence and thrills and instead followed JM with the buddy system to hell.
The things we do for love. And If he hasn't told JM yet that he is in love with him, which I am sure he has and or JM at least feels it, but if he hasn't, I hope he gets the courage too one day, cause doing all this, plus following someone to depths of hell, is an awful lot of loving on one person, for it to be for nothing. To do all this for someone, then go home empty handed. What a hell you have to live in that you created for yourself. FYI, I think JM is just as in love with Jk and he appreciates everything, because Letter says it & that he plans to give it all back, what he's received, and I know JM is a man of his word. In fact, I'd say Jk is pretty damn satisfied & gets it back, cause he's still there, standing next to JM, just like he promised. I've never rooted so hard in my life for two people, but these two, I hope it all works out for them and Whatever kind of love it is that they have for one another. I hope it lasts forever.
Damn the onions got my eyes😭😭😭😭🤧
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eeunoia · 6 months ago
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ENHYPEN Mini Series
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ENHYPEN as Taylor Swifts Song
THE WAY I LOVED YOU
synopsis: they said in our life, there will be that one love that is so intense and passionate. the type of love that has good and bad days on it, but still feel home for you. the type of love that makes you crazy. so many emotions but for only one person. that’s park sunghoon for you.
pairings: park sunghoon x reader
word count: 12k.
warnings: toxic relationship, angst, sunghoon being a redflag. (let me know if i missed some)
note: i got totally carried away with this one and honestly i’m totally satisfied on how i wrote this. i’m currently on my psh phase so i’m totally crazy for him lol anyway, i hope you enjoy this fic and please please please leave your thoughts on replies or send me some ask. it helps so much to keep me writing more. ily & stay safe!
eeunoia 2024 © all rights reserved.
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“Where are you going?” you asked while pulling the sheet up to your chest, watching your boyfriend scurrying to gather his things as he put his clothes on.
He threw you a short glance, hair still disheveled from the heated session you two just shared and went back on to what he was doing.
“Band practice.” he shortly replied.
You gulped, spacing out after his response. Its not that this is the first time he did this. Having sex with you and leave once his bandmates calls him out for practice. You always think that it was his priority over his relationship with you.
His steps are quick when he approach and kissed the top of your head like as if it will do any better.
“I'll see you later, okay?” and then turned his back to go on his way without sending you another look.
After hearing the sound of the door closing and locks clicking, you laid back on your shared bed and stared right at the ceiling. Mind occupied by a lot of thoughts and slowly feeling the energy finally draining out of you.
You have been dating Park Sunghoon for exactly three years now. He's the hot drummer of the band called PARADOX. Handsome, talented and very passionate man. He sure love what he does the most, music.
People who knows the two of you may say that your relationship with him is pretty sturdy. Despite the scruffles and misunderstanding along the side, the memories and bond you built together was not easy to break.
They'll also probably mention how the two of you are an odd combination. You, being someone who finished college to have a righteous degree and works as a fine finance manager in a big company and Sunghoon, being the drummer of a said band.
Its not that being in a band and making music is a bad occupation, its just compared to yours, his is just more unstable. Yes, he is good. His band is really good and somehow makes it to places to share their music, but at some point it just doesn't fit.
Sometimes, they still wonder how the two of you works it out. How you can handle the mess and the outgoing side of Park Sunghoon, notwithstanding the fact of being someone who loves peace and have a priggish personality.
“Are you still playing in that band?” this are the common question your Father loves to throw during dinners whenever you take Sunghoon home with you.
You've always know how things ends up so you are expeditious on getting in between.
“Dad.” you looked at him with a pleading eyes, hoping he'll cooperate tonight and let you guys have a peaceful dinner just for once.
Sunghoon tensed beside you as his hold over his utensils tighten, as well as his jaw. It was already hard to swallow food now that he's inside your home having dinner with your parents and now your Dad is again belittling him.
“Yes, sir.” he answered.
The usual disappointing and downgrading look on his face makes Sunghoon feels awful. During this time is when he'll surely never get used to. It makes him realize that no matter how good he do, no matter how great his band became, he will never be someone so worthy in the eyes of your Father.
“And for how long will you plan to do this nonsense?” he was not holding back at all. His wife, your Mom, beside him gently reaches for his arm, trying to stop him from saying more.
Sunghoon clenched his jaw, “Making music is not nonsense. We are doing well right now, sir.”
The way he says those words just makes your Father even more pissed at him. He always hates how he was so confident and prideful. The way he stands whenever he greets him after arriving at your home is giving off as someone imperious.
He scoffed humorless, “And for how long? I've already told you that there's no future in that dream of yours.”
“Dad!” your voice raised because you couldn't handle what he's saying right now.
Sunghoon stands abruptly, making a dragging sound from the chair he was occupying. He balled his fist and just stormed outside of your house. You stood and stared at your Dad with a look of dispair in your eyes. He didn't back down and just gave you this knowing look.
“I asked you to stop doing that.”
“And I already told you to leave that boy countless times, y/n. Stop wasting your time with him!” he strictly said.
“Never.” and with that you turned your feet to start coming after your boyfriend.
You saw him a few blocks away walking towards where he parked his motorcycle. With quick steps, you try to catch up on him.
“Sunghoon!” you screamed, but he didn't even looked back on you.
With gritted teeth, you hurried your steps even more and right on time that he ride his motorcycle, you grabbed him by his arm.
“Why are you not stopping!” you yelled, tears brimming your eyes.
He glanced at you and that's when you saw his bloodshot eyes. Your boyfriend never cries. His playful demeanor never showed his weak side, even with you. Maybe your father was right. He is someone full of pride and sometimes arrogant, but you love him. And he loves you.
“I told you already that I don't want to come! But you forced me anyway!” he yelled, making you flinch a little.
It was really your fault because you are so persistent on making the things between your Dad and him to work despite knowing the outcome of this visit to your parent's house.
“He will never see me worthy of you. You are always so hard to reach for me...” his tone low that made your heart crack. You've never seen him like this before.
His eyes darken as he teared his gaze away, shoving your hold off from his arm. You started to panic and watch how he grabs the handle of his vehicle then started the engine.
“W-What are you doing? Are you leaving m-me?” you asked in a broken tone that made him falter a bit, but the pain from the scene of how your father belittled him was stronger.
Rain starts pouring, but you stood your ground. Didn't even bothered that you are starting to get soaked by the now pouring rain.
“P-Please, don't do this.” you begged and Sunghoon stared at you and maybe it was the rain? Or the cold breeze surrounding you two, but he seems so cold and distant. It breaks you slowly.
“I l-love you so much.” you gulped getting rid of the lump on your throat. “P-Please.”
But he starts droving off. Your heart sank and quickly tries to run after him. Its stupid because there's no way to catch up just by running, but your mind was too clouded to even think straight.
The rain poured even harder and your knees felt weak from running too much. You stopped and cries even harder, heart feeling so broken. You don't feel bothered by the cold at all and all you can think of is how your chest is hurting so bad. You felt slightly suffocated from crying so hard, giving you a hard time to breath.
A roaring sound of an engine makes you lift your head and a string of hope ignites when you saw lights emitting from a vehicle that is driving near you.
Your lips shakes when you saw the familiar motorcycle stopping beside you, Sunghoon's all drenched like you when he turned his head at your side.
“Your father,” he starts and you shake your head sideways trying to stop him, but he continued. “he may hate me to his bones. He may resent me and never want me for you.” one of his hand lets go from the handle and reach over your hand.
“But I love you.” he said firmly that made you tear up even more. “I love you so fucking much that it hurts.” he pursed his lips hardly, jaw clenching hard as he tries to hide his emotions.
You cried and lets go from his hand to cup his face. Both feeling so cold from the nonstop rain but the warmth you two are giving each were enough for you. You leaned in connecting your lips before pulling away to stare at his eyes.
“I don't care about what he thinks. I only want you and no one else.”
He smirks then starts handing you a helmet.
“Then hop on, pretty. We're going to get sick if we stay here longer.”
And without a hint of hesitation, you wore the helmet and hopped on his motorbike. Sunghoon pulls your arm so you can hug him from behind.
“Hold on tight and don't let go.”
“Never.”
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“Sunghoon, I told you already I'm still at the office. I can't be out until before 9pm.” your elbow rests over your desk as you try and massage your temple to ease your aching head.
“But our gig will start at eight pm, y/n. You said you'll watch.” he sounded so upset.
Normally, you will hurry yourself to go attend his gig but today was a rough day for you as well. Too many office works are lined up for you, workload piled up that you don't even know where to start. You know how much it means for Sunghoon having you to be there for him. But today's just so draining. And sometimes you kind of feel like you were always there for him but when will he be there for you?
“Sunghoon,” you draw in a heavy breath, calming yourself down to prevent saying anything that can spoil his mood. That’s the last thing you want to do if he have a gig.
“It’s just unexpctedly a very busy day. I need to finish all these works on time—” he cuts you even before you can finish your sentence.
“Just say it if you want to spend time with that co-worker and stop making lame excuses, y/n.” the sarcasm that lurks over his tone caught you dumbfounded.
Your mouth hanged open, unable to even utter your response to this nonsense he’s trying to imply. He’s very unbelievable. You are very tired already, the workload’s too heavy and here he is doubting you. He still have the audacity of accusing you over things when all you want is for this day to be over so you can see him and rest.
Sunghoon’s naturally a jealous boyfriend. He’s very possessive of you to the point that sometimes it can be out of hand. His bad temper and jealous demeanor is not a good combo because he always ends up fucking up things and telling you things he didn’t mean at all.
“Baby, no. Of course not! I really want to watch your gig, you know that right? It’s just—”
“You will really choose that over me, aren’t you? Like as if people doesn’t think I was unworthy of you already. You just really need to prove more...” his monotonous tone are like knives straight to your heart.
“Don’t even go there. You know its not that.” your lips tremble along with your hands as the conversations starts to get more intense.
“Yeah, right. Have fun with your co-worker.” he mumbled with a bitter tone and ended the call right away.
You shut your eyes as you drop your phone to your desk wrecklessly before running your hand through your hair, messing it a bit. The silence occupying the almost empty building floor didn’t help from the aching of your head. He’s really just unbelievable.
And it’s even more unbelievable that you are still so in love with him despite the red flags he’s obviously showing you. It was too late for you to even realize that you are already packing your things to go and see your boyfriend’s gig. The mountain-like paperworks that were on your table caught your eyes and made you halt for a bit, but in the end you chose to turn the lights off and head out of your office. Off to see your sulking boyfriend.
When you arrived, it was their last song for the night. The traffic on the way made the suppose to be 20 minute travel an hour long drive. A relieved sigh made it to your lips while you walk towards their manager, your feet starts to stings from your high-heel.
“Y/n! I thought you couldn’t make it tonight? Sunghoon said.” he smiled warmly before giving you a friendly hug.
You tried your best to return his smile as your eyes roamed and trailed over to the stage. The spotlight that pointed over your boyfriend gave you the chance to have the perfect view of him playing passionately. A small string tugs inside your heart while watching him, eyes closed and letting himself be drawn by music.
When people ask you why you fell so hard for him, they probably won’t understand you unless they’ll be in your shoes themselves. These are the moment he shines the most. The moment you can clearly see the real him. His love for his passion and his smiles melts you from the inside and out. It was unexplainable. You love Sunghoon. You love him so dearly to the point your heart aches.
When he opens his eyes like as if he felt an intense eyes are watching him, he met yours. Those pretty eyes that looks at him with so much affection. The eyes that pretty much made him feel things no one else can. The eyes that can comfort him. His safe place, his solace and his other half. For Sunghoon, if music is his passion then you are the life that pushes him to chase it. His inspiration.
His eyes fixated over you and lips pursed into a pout, still sulking. That made you chuckle and mouthed, ‘I love you.’
Sunghoon’s lips lifts up before responding, ‘I love you too.’ that made your stomach churns and heart thumping like crazy. Somehow it made you feel at ease. Despite all the worries and trials, as long as you have him, you will manage.
Only you and him will understand the type of love you share with each other.
“Thank you so much for tonight everyone! And we are...” Heeseung, their lead vocalists stalls his words and glanced at his band-mates and in unison they leaned over the mics near them and said, “PARADOX.”
The crowd cheers and you can see how they truly enjoyed the whole show. A small, but proud smile made its way towards your lips. The boys did a short fan service while you stay at the side with their manager. Girls swarms around them, but you didn’t mind it. This isn’t new for you anymore and if you want a partner in this line of job, you should prepare yourself for crazy fangirls.
“I’m really glad you made it, y/n” your head snaps over to the side when their manager spoke. He gave you this sincere look on his face and some other kind of gaze you couldn’t identify.
He sports this plain white shirt and some jeans. Hair styled in a pretty basic style any boy could pull and then he stood there a little stiff. You gave him a smile and a clap over his shoulder.
“Of course, I want my boyfriend to know I’m always here for him.” you stated that made his smile falter for a bit. He was quick to pull it back up, nodding his head slowly like as if he was reminded of something.
“Right... Sunghoon.” he mumbled.
Your gaze remained at him, a little confused of his reaction. It bothered you a bit so you’re about to ask him what’s wrong when a pair of strong arms wrapped around your waist.
“Hi hotstuff.” Sunghoon’s voice sounded so seductive as he quickly leans for a heated kiss.
You squeals lightly and tries to pull off from him, but ends up giving in and showing everyone how you two devours each other’s faces. One of Sunghoon’s hand moved down to slightly grope your butt that made you moan a little over his lips. He smirks, mission accomplished for him.
He was greeted by your blushing cheeks once he pulled away, one hand still possessively resting over your waist to keep you close to him.
“H-Hello,” the impact of your latest stunt dawning you, making you feel so shy.
He smirks, fangs showing and good Lord, does he look even hotter.
“You came.” his tone indicates the joy to see you here and that just makes you feel so much better. He may not vocally thank you or tell you he appreciates it so much, but the way his eyes twinkle and shines was enough for you to know how he feels.
“Of course. My boyfriend is being sulky so I have no other choice.” the corner of your lips lifts up, taunting him.
He stares at your eyes before grinning even wider, “I’m not sulky.” he leans in again, couldn’t resist your lips after glancing at it for a second. After he placed a loving kiss, he leans away and went back on facing his friends.
You watch how he threw a short glance at their manager as well and it remained for a while before he direct his attention to some acquaintances that are greeting his band.
The night was long, as usual. This is pretty much what happens whenever he have gigs. You feel so tired, feet feels so painful that you are sure you grew blisters over it. Your eyelids felt so heavy as well, the long day finally kicking in. The boys are still loud and celebrating, but finally one called it a night.
All of you starts heading outside the bar they performed in. Sunghoon’s walking a few steps ahead of you, talking and goofing with his friends. You are silent, too tired to even listen or join on their conversation.
You were almost hit by the door when Sunghoon didn’t even remember to hold it for you. He was too busy talking to his band-mates and didn’t even noticed that the door almost slapped you on the face. Thankfully, an arm held it for you.
“Thank you, Riki.” you gave him a small smile.
You’ve been together with Sunghoon for a while now so that only means you’ve hanged out with his band countless times causing you to grew closer towards them. But for some reasons, Riki is the only one who is somehow felt awkward to be with. You cannot explain why, but there’s just something about him that leaves you nothing to say.
He didn’t smile or anything, just stared down to you using his intimidating eyes.
“No problem.” shivers ran to your spines because of his low voice. His eyes then moved from looking at your eyes towards your things you’re trying to juggle with your arms.
“Let me help you.” it was not a question and even before you can say something to politely reject his offer, his hands reaches over to help you carry your things.
“U-Uhm, thanks.” and your eyes drifted over him as he didn't spoke any words after that.
Riki walks you up to where your boyfriend’s car was parked. Sunghoon’s eyes finally caught you and you don’t even know what to tell him while you approach closer.
His strict eyes caught to your things being carried by Riki. When you are steps away from him, he approaches trying to keep a cool smile.
“Baby, you disappeared from behind me.” and he said that while eyes fixed at his bandmate.
“Well if you keep a close eye to your girlfriend, you might’ve noticed how she’s struggling carrying her stuff, hyung.” Riki didn’t even hesitate to say those words at him.
Sunghoon wasn’t happy about it and you can clearly see anger slowly rising through his face. He clicked his tongue at the side of his cheeks and was about to advance towards Riki, but you stopped him.
“Can we just go? It’s already late and I have work tomorrow.” you stared straight at his eyes.
They were arrogantly looking at you, but eventually softening in surrender. He sighs and grabbed your hand to intertwin your fingers before he nods silently. His head snapped over to his friend and he gave him this knowing look before opening the car’s door for you.
He retrieved your things from Riki and placed it neatly behind your car. Thankfully, he didn’t say anything anymore and just went inside his car afterwards. Riki went on his way as well, riding his motorbike that was parked not too far away.
Sunghoon starts his engine and both of you are silent. It was like that for the first few minutes of the drive, until he decides to break it.
“When did you even got close to Riki?” his tone sounds confused and at the same time implicating something.
You furrowed your brows and glanced at him, “He just helped me to carry my things—”
“Exactly! He doesn’t do that at all, y/n.” the way he said your name was with emphasis. Like telling you that its a serious matter for him. A big deal. But again, when did it never became a big deal when other boys gets involve with you?
“And? I’m his bandmate’s girlfriend. Isn’t it okay for him to help me?!” now, you can’t help but to feel upset about this because you are tired already and he’s making an argument just because Riki helped you.
“You’re just really clueless with your surroundings. You will never understand.” the way his grip tightens at the steering wheel and his jaw clenches caught your attention.
You wanted to just yell at him and point out how he’s being unreasonable and plain childish about this, but you are too drained. Its late already, you’re tired from the office, your feet hurts with this dumb heels and you feel sticky from all the travel you did just to get to their gig. Having an argument with him was the last thing you expected to have.
“Its not my fault that my boyfriend forgot about me and walks off.” you sighed and he was silent after hearing that from you.
“Can’t you just be thankful that he helped me and I didn’t broke an arm from carrying all those stuff?” this time, you tried to soften your tone as a sign of time-out from this nonsense argument he was trying to put up with.
You saw his grip softens and he released a heavy sigh. “Fine.” he glanced at you and his brows are not hardly furrowed anymore. His eyes softens as well. “I’m sorry, baby. Its not my intention to make you feel like I forgot you, I was just really excited.”
With pursed lips, you nodded your head and leaned in for a quick peck over his lips.
“I know. That’s why I didn’t spoil the mood. You were really great from a while ago.” you complimented him, finishing it with your warm smile.
Something warm caress his heart. This is one of the reasons why he can never let you go. Most people would’ve walked out on him or hate at him, but not you. Never.
You will always find a way to find the goodness in him. Even if 99 problematic things about him are presented in front of you, you’ll still find that 1 good thing about him.
You always know the perfect words to calm him down or make him feel better.
He reached over your hand that was resting over your thighs and took it over his lips for a soft kiss. His gaze never left your eyes.
“Thank you for today, really.” he sighs, trying to supply himself more oxygen as he feels like you’re taking his breaths away once again.
“I love you.”
A smile spreads across your face and your free hand stretched out towards him to cup his face. “I love you, Hoon.”
These are the moments you wanted to keep no matter what. Reasons why despite the hardships you go through with Sunghoon, you always manages to find a reason to stay.
But of course, there’s not always good times in your relationship. What else gives it spice other than petty arguments and very random fights with each other?
Months after, the band had another big gig and of course you went to support him like usual. To your surprise, they had a guest singer. Female singer to be exact. And the way she interacts with your boyfriend just can’t leave your mind. It’s bothering you.
“You two seems close.” the comment was short and your eyes watch how your boyfriend load his things inside his car while you rest your back beside it.
Sunghoon threw you a short glance and narrowed his brows.
“What do you mean?”
“You and that girl.” the way you pronounced the word ‘girl’ with so much emphasis gave off hints towards him that you’re implying something.
His shoulder fell as he stared at you for a while, like unconsciously asking if you’re being serious with the choice of tone you decided to use at him. He sighs, when he realized you aren’t budging, but instead crossed your arms at him.
He’s already too tired to even explain things that you won’t listen to. So he struts closer you, held you over your hips and planted a sweet kiss on the lips.
“Let’s just go home, hot stuff. I’m tired.” and he walks over to the driver’s seat not even bothering to open the door for you.
But it seems like you are in the mood to be petty. So even after you made it to the passenger seat and he started driving on your way home, you bring up that topic once again.
“I saw the way she looks at you. I bet she’s undressing you in her mind.”
It made him sigh and roll his eyes. “Seriously? Are you going to talk about that until we makes it to the apartment?”
“Why? You irritated already?” you tilt your head and he glanced at you with piercing gaze. It didn’t bother you at all. If he’s pissed, then you are too.
“You didn’t even introduce me to her.”
His fingers taps his steering wheel more frequently and bit his lips. He sighs, calming himself.
“I did. I even told her your name.”
“But you didn’t told her that I’m your girlfriend!” it was so petty. Even you, you also think that this is such a nonsense thing to argue off. It’s just seeing her look at your boyfriend that way while you’re there doesn’t sit right for you.
Sunghoon scoffed loudly and even if he have a smirk on his face, there was no humor on it. He’s slowly losing his patience.
The wiper of his car moves when it suddenly started raining. It’s the last thing you care about. Your focus is on the hot drummer that’s currently driving you home in your shared apartment. The hot drummer that’s clenching his jaw hardly while trying his best not to argue with you. The hot drummer whose lips so red after you kissed him multiple times to make that bitch know her place. The hot drummer that is clenching his jaw hardly because you keep pushing his buttons at the moment.
“Are you fucking serious right now?” he couldn’t help, but curse.
“Be honest with me. Are you two close? Because with the way she linked her arms, it seems like so.”
He rolled his eyes as he teared his gaze off of you and back to the road. The rain are still pouring hard that its a little difficult to drive.
“You really aren’t going to stop unless I answer your questions, are you?” he surrenders. You didn’t answer and just crossed your arms while looking at him. Waiting for what he’s about to say.
He gave you another short glance as he shook his head. Like he couldn’t believe what situation you just put him into.
Honestly, you don’t know what exactly it is that you wanted to hear from him. If he answers that he doesn’t know her that long, you will still feel pissed because why the hell does she acts like they’ve been best friends ever since they were born? And if he answers, yes they know each other for a long time, you will feel really bad because you will feel jealous.
“We’ve known each other since highschool. Even before the band started playing in other places.” he says.
Your shoulder fell and he saw it from his peripheral view. He knew you won’t feel so good about it, but he also know that lying about it will only make the situation worse. The car fell silent right after he said it.
“Is she your ex-girlfriend?” that question doesn’t sound like you are asking him. Its more like you already know and just expecting an answer from him.
“No, okay? So calm your dumbass.” he’s starting to lose his patience for you.
You’ll be honest, you kind of thought he would say yes. That actually made you feel better. But not enough to let her slip away from your mind. Those eyes. The way she looks at you just boils something inside you.
“Did you two kissed before?” you fired him that question with more suspicion.
When you saw the look on his face, you felt something in your heart cracks. It definitely stab something in you when his expression confirmed that.
With slightly teary eyed, you raised your chin up to ask him your last question.
“Did you have sex with her?” bitterness latched through your voice and you bit your lower lip when he stayed silent again. Confirmed.
“Pull over.” you command and harshly wiped the tears that escaped.
He sighs, “Baby, come on...” he pursed his lips and even tried to reach over you.
“I said pull over!”
He clenched his jaw tighter then obliged, knowing well you will just fall into a much worse mood if he don’t do as you say. He’s expecting you to hit him by his arm or shout at him again, but he surely didn’t expect you storming out from his car. He didn’t see that one coming.
Between you two, he’s the jealous one. There are rare times that you get jealous and when it happens, its so hard to calm you down. Sunghoon’s heart is thumping hard, slightly thrilled to watch you acting like this. The oh so perfect, y/n. Shouting and acting crazy out of jealousy. He bet he’s the only one who made you feel like this.
“Y/n!” he shouts and went after you.
The rain starts to pour harder, but it didn’t bothered you at all. You marched away from his car, towards the nearest bus stop. With just a few steps, he managed to catch up on you and grabbed your arm then yanked you towards him.
“Let me go!” you screamed at him.
Sunghoon’s clenching his jaw as he stares at your face carefully. It was hard to tell if you’re crying or not due to the rain that’s slowly soaking you both. Despite your attempts to free yourself, Sunghoon just tightens his grip and kept his stares over you.
“Stop being a brat and let’s go back inside the car! We’re both drenched because of you!”
You clenched your jaw and hands into fists. People who passes by will probably think that you’re both losing your minds. Going out in the middle of the rain and fighting at 2 am. Thankfully, there are fewer cars driving through.
“I cannot believe you fuck that bitch!” it was rare enough to see you shouting, but much more rare to hear you cursing like this.
“It was a long time ago!” he renew his hold and this time reached for the other arm. The wetness of your skin kind of makes it slippery, but he knew he won’t let go of you.
“That happened before you, y/n! And it means nothing for me.”
“Clearly isn’t the same for her?!” you stopped resisting and just stay still, glaring at him.
“The way she links her arms and flirts with you drives me insane! Like I want to pull you away and kiss you in front of her type of insane!”
Sunghoon’s dumbfounded. He knows he should not feel so happy about what he heard, but he is. Just by thinking of you going crazy to the point you’ll insist public affection is making his heart race. To think you are crazy for him as he is to you, is driving him even more crazier. He just couldn’t get enough of you.
“Then why didn’t you?” this time he seems more calmer that made your narrowed brows falter. He was just screaming at you too, now he’s a lot calmer.
“I’m yours, y/n. I belong to you so claiming me in front of anybody is no problem at all.” he says and took another step closer. Your bodies pressed together and when he noticed that you aren’t trying to escape his hold anymore, he raised his hand to cup your face.
“I don’t fucking care if she tries to flirt with me. I don’t care about her. All I care about is you.” his eyes slowly roams his eyes to your pretty face.
“Yes, we did kissed and fucked before,” he sighs and your lips pursed into a pout but let him finish what he wants to say.
“But she never made me feel like this.” he held one of your hand then rest it above his chest, enough for you to feel his racing heartbeat.
“She doesn’t make me nervous whenever she stares at my eyes. She doesn’t give me butterflies whenever she smiles at me or melt my heart whenever she hold me.” your eyes water from his sincere words as he licked his lower lip, gaze not leaving you.
Both of you are soaked, but it didn’t bother you at all. Sunghoon’s bangs covers his forehead, some beads of rains falling from it over to your face as he stare down at you.
“That’s all you, love. Only you can make me feel madly in love. Like I will go crazy because I love you too much.” a tear fell from his eyes along with the raindrops from his hair. He looked ethereal staring at you lovingly, with so much emotions that makes your heart burst because of exceptional happiness.
“That’s the way I love you.” he murmured near your lips before you leaned to press a hot kiss for him.
“I love you so much, Hoon.” and this time, it was his turn to lean and kiss you passionately.
Disregarding the fact that you are under the hard pouring rain, sharing probably one of the most memorable kisses of your relationship, you’re mind is clouded by how intense your feelings are for the man that holding you right now. It’s funny how moments ago you’re just screaming at each other and now, your lips feels so hot connected together.
But it seems like, love is not enough to keep the relationship steady. And just like what older people used to say, everything is bad when its too much.
Being with Sunghoon felt like a dream with nightmares, clear blue oceans with big dangerous waves and a freaking roller coaster ride. Sometimes you’re so happy that you feel like your heart will burst with so much emotions and sometimes you feel like everything’s too much. That its tiring and draining you.
It somehow toxicating. And this toxic relationship with Sunghoon is honestly tiring you.
“And now you are giving me the silent treatment? Wow!” his sarcasm rubs on you, making your heart feel more heavy.
“I have nothing to say to you after what you just did, Sunghoon.”
“What? You’re mad because I embarrassed him? He’s clearly hitting on you!” your head snaps at him with glaring eyes.
“He’s just being nice and he’s my head supervisor!” your tone raised and he didn’t liked it in one bit.
Sunghoon’s always the jealous boyfriend. You actually couldn’t understand why he’s being like this when you already made it so clear that he’s the only one for you. That there’s no man that can ever steal you away from him.
“Oh, okay. I see...” he clenched his jaw before laughing with no humor. He faced the road and tried hard to focus on driving.
“If you want to impress your supervisor so much, why bring me with you?!” his statement made you roll your eyes in annoyance.
“Because you’re my boyfriend and I want you to be there for me! Will it hurt so much to be supportive or know something about what your girlfriend loves to do?! It’s not always going to be about you, Sunghoon! I need you to be there for me too!”
Your words may had come out wrongly, but all you wanted is for him to be for you. It was a thrilling day since employees should make good impressions to the supervisors to show how fit and reliable they are for the company, but your bofriend just made a scene and now you have no idea how you will show up to work on Monday.
“I told you already that these type of events are not for me! People are clearly looking down on me for having such a wonderful girl like you! They will always rub it on my face how perfect you are and that you deserve so much better!” his tone raised and it made you jolt a bit.
“And it seems like you just don’t get it! You kept on forcing me to go and I hated it! You are just determined to prove me that they’re so right!”
Your heart cracks and his words are like knives straight to your heart. You know him. Whenever he’s mad, he ought to say words he doesn’t mean. That’s his way of avoiding to show what he truly feels. You can tell by his blood-shot eyes and clenching jaw. But you are tired. You are tired of understanding him.
“Is that how you really see me? Do you really think that that’s what I’m doing?”
He clenches his jaw, being stubborn. “Maybe you are really ambitious and I’m just the stupid boyfriend who knows nothing but to enjoy music.” he says emotionless.
A tear left your eye. You can’t take this anymore. You had enough.
“Stop the car.” it was almost audible, but thanks to the deafening silence after what he said made it clear and loud. He furrowed his brows and looked at you, checking if you’re being serious.
You two have been arguing about you and this job for a week. And the event is today and Sunghoon just ruined it for you. Honestly you’re getting enough of it. With all the stress from your work and family, he suppose to be your resting place. But that’s not the case anymore.
He did stop the car and even before you open it, he said something. “The moment you leave, we’re done.” he said coldly.
You halted from stepping outside and felt your heart crack, but you knew you needed it and so you did. You left him.
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“Jake’s so sweet, y/n! I truly envy you for having him as your boyfriend!” one of your friends exclaimed right after Jake left your table to go order some food.
You gave them a small smile. They’re right. Jake is really the best boyfriend. He treats you very well. He’s everything you’ve asked for before. A caring and loving boyfriend. He’s working in the corporate world, which matches yours. He’s very gentle towards you, always got the doors for you, he never makes you wait, he cares for what you want and a man of his words. He felt like so warm to be with, someone you can be comfortable with easily.
“Yeah,” you replied short with a small smile on your lips. They giggle, truly happy for you.
“Thank God you snapped out of it and finally got the man you deserve.” one of them says that made your smile falter.
She didn’t mention anything or any name, but you knew who she’s referring to and what she means by that sentence.
An awkward laugh from another friend broke the silence and just diverted the topic. You tried to pull up your smile once again, especially after seeing from a distance that Jake’s already on his way back to your table.
He sets himself at the chair beside you and smoothly made a conversation with your friends. He’s very friendly too. He gets along with people with no sweat. Such a pure man.
You’re about to put a straw to your drink, but he beats you out of it. He reached for it and carefully slid it towards you while still talking to your friends. It made you smile. Being treated like this sure feels right, feels okay. But why does your heart feel a little heavy?
Jake threw his arm and placed it behind your chair, hand caressing your arm gently. You pushed whatever that feeling is behind your mind and tries to join their conversation as well.
The day went smoothly and now Jake dropped you at your place. As you unclasped your seatbelt, he went out of the car then walked around so he can open your door for you. He even offered a hand with that warm smile of his.
A chuckle slips off from you before you accepted it and went out. His other hand rests over your hip as he slightly pins you to his car to place a kiss over your lips. He smiles after a couple of pecks then leans away to stare at your eyes.
“You’re so beautiful.” he says sincerely that made you smile widely. Jake and his words.
“You’ve been saying that all day, Jake.”
He chuckles, biting his lips feeling a little shy. “Just so you wouldn’t forget.”
“Thank you.” you said while looking straight to his eyes.
He might take it as a thank you for today, but there’s more to it. Jake’s the next serious relationship after Sunghoon and it can’t be helped to compare the two of them. Even if you know its not good to do that, you just can’t stop yourself from doing so. They’re very different from each other.
“No problem.” he leans again to give you another peck.
“See you tomorrow, baby.” Jake said with a soft smile. You nodded and waved before going inside your apartment and called it a day.
It’s been almost a year ever since that night and yet its still fresh from your memory like it was just yesterday. You resigned from your previous job. You wanted so bad to convince everybody that it was because you’re embarrassed by what happened prior to it, but no. It was mainly because you kind of blamed it for losing your relationship. Kind of dumb, but maybe you are really insane when it comes to him.
Sunghoon never contacted you after that. You didn’t hear from him ever since and honestly it pissed and got you butt hurt. Well, you did change your number and blocked him from all your social media but you kind of hoped he will try to reach out for you.
Seems like it was meant to end that way.
Some people from your life kept telling you that you did the right thing, that it was the best decision you’ve ever made. You got a new job, got a new boyfriend that your parents approved. They adore Jake so much. He’s so close to your Mother and to your Dad as they’re both into business.
You should be happy about it. You are happy. But a part of you aches for someone. A bitter feeling lingers inside you because they never tried to open their heart for Sunghoon before. It makes you think that if they did, maybe things went a little more okay.
You threw your head back and stared at the ceiling. A slight guilt crept inside your heart. You got the perfect boyfriend you’ve been praying for and he’s treating you right. He barely even fight with you as he was always understanding.
But as stupid as it sounds, you missed screaming and fighting with Sunghoon. Those instense moments that just brings out much more emotions within you that makes you act insane.
These thoughts are making you crazy so you decided to take a quick shower and just call it a day. You went to bed with eyes brimmed with tears, aching and missing him so bad. It frustrates you because you feel helpless, unable to do anything about it. You’re scared to think that you are still thinking of him right now while he’s happy with someone else.
The next thing you know, it was morning already. Your eyes hurts a bit for crying to sleep last night so you’re slightly out of it when you went to your office.
“Do you want some coffee? Looks like you need one.” one of your officemates offered that you returned with a small pout.
“Please.” and she nods before going to the pantry for a while to get you your coffee.
“Here you go.” and she gently placed it on your working table. You mumbled a small ‘thanks’ as she settles at her chair beside yours.
“Oh!” your head craned to glance at her. “We will be meeting the new potential investors to our company later. I heard one of them is really good looking.” she giggles that made you smirk.
“You know its not always just by the looks, right?”
She rolled her eyes, “Easy for you to say because you have a gorgeous boyfriend!”
You laughed, “That is right.”
You joked around for a while before you’re asked to prepare for the arrival of the vip guests. Soon after, your head supervisor walks in and behind her are men wearing suits and tie. Looking like some young bachelors. Tall and handsome men.
As your eyes shifted to the last one who walks inside, your heart dropped. His familiar fair skin, charcoal black hair, noise pointy with a pretty mole at the side of it, eyes blank surrounded with thick and pretty eyelashes, topping it with his thick eyebrows that makes his skin color glow even more. His lips naturally red and luscious. Your knees weakened at the sight and heart started to race.
“Oh my god, Y/n!” she whispered beside you and even wiggled a little like as if she was got electicuted.
“He's so handsome!”
Oh hell yes he is. And your eyes watered at the sight of him. The familiar feeling of longing occupies your whole system. Park Sunghoon stood there looking so breathtaking. You missed everything in him and you hate how he looked so okay.
He unconsciously roamed his eyes around and accidentally met yours. It grew slightly, clearly not expecting seeing you. His lips parted a bit and didn’t glanced away.
“Y/n?” she snapped you out of your thoughts and you quickly teared your gaze away, feeling ashamed for staring too long. He probably saw you looking like a loser for being affected too much.
Sooner, they guided you inside to start the meeting and you kept on shifting from your seat. Having meeting like this is normal for you already, but now that you have your ex boyfriend sat at the other end of the table makes you really conscious.
“You okay?” your office mate might’ve noticed your weird demeanor so she looked concern.
You flashed her a shy smile and nodded then tried to focus on the person talking. But a minute after, your mind is drifting somewhere else once again. Even before you know it, your eyes shifts to where he was sat and to your surprise, he’s looking at you already.
You glanced away and cleared your throat. Embarrased that he caught you stealing glances at him.
When you couldn’t take it anymore, you turned over your supervisor and tried excusing yourself. Making up a lie that you’re not feeling well. She seemed to buy it and asked you to take a rest. Without wasting anytime, you stood up and politely excused yourself from the meeting.
A few steps out from the conference room and you heard it opened again. You ignored it and tried calming yourself, but the memory of Sunghoon’s eyes flashed before your eyes. Your eyes got teary. Seeing him just awoke your sleeping feelings for him that you tried to bury deep inside your heart.
“Y/n.” and a hand halted you from making another step.
You glanced at the person who stopped you and your heart thumped even faster. His brows narrowed and eyes looked concern.
“Are you okay? Why did you leave the meeting?” his tone sounded so soft and it makes you want to cry on the spot.
Now that you’re face to face and this close to each other, you can see how much he grown. He slightly changed. Good change, mostly. He looked even more mature and manly. His familiar manly scent invaded your nose that draws in so many memories of you two.
“Y-Yes,” and you flashed him a fake smile. “How are you, Sunghoon? It’s b-been a while.”
His shoulder relaxed after hearing that you’re okay. His eyes dropped to his hand holding your arm and slowly, he lets go of it.
“I’m good.” he responded briefly before roaming his eyes on your face. His heart aches.
“It looks like you’ve been doing well.” there's a hint of sadness looming over his tone, but you tried to ignore it thinking that you’re just mishearing it.
“Yeah.”
“Good to know.” it sounded a little sarcastic.
“Why are you here? Did you stop playing with your band?” the question you wanted to ask so bad. It was odd enough to see him here and much weirder because you know how much he hates wearing suit and ties. Tho you must admit that he looks so good on it.
He smirks, bitterness over his eyes.
“I still do, but not as often as before.”
“Ohh,” you sounded sad because you are. You know how much he loves doing that.
You’re about to say something else when your phone rang. You fished it from your pocket and when you saw your boyfriend’s caller id, you felt like someone slapped you back to reality. You want to hurt yourself for starting to act crazy once again just after seeing your ex boyfriend.
When you glance back at him, you saw his eyes darted at your phone with a cold expression on his face. You gulped, feeling nervous before you answered it.
“Baby!” the cheerfulness over Jake’s voice spreads guilt on your chest pretty fast. A tsunami on the shore, coming unexpected.
“H-hey, babe.” you murmured and steal a glance over at Sunghoon.
His expression fell cold as he straighten his back, not leaning anymore so he can slightly match your height. His hands slid inside his pocket as he stared at you intensely. His eyes are piercing right at you, like a cop catching you red-handed. To why he is still standing there and not leaving is slightly a mystery for you.
“Hi sweetheart. I called just to remind you about later tonight.” he says, accent coming a little strong.
Now you’re attention had been snatched away from the beautiful man standing right in front of you. With a confused face, you wondered what he is talking about. Trying to remember if you missed any plans he had made for the two of you tonight.
“T-Tonight? What’s up tonight?” and you slightly turned away from Sunghoon for some privacy. But you can still feel his heated gaze, burning holes at the back of your head.
“Don’t tell me you forgot?” he asks, slightly taunting. You didn’t respond and just wait for him to reveal about it.
“We’re having dinner at your parents tonight, baby.”
You draws in a sigh and hand raised to massage your temple.
“Oh, that was today.”
He chuckles, “Yes. Don’t worry, I got your Mom’s favorite flower and your Dad’s wine.”
You bit your lower lip for another perfect boyfriend scenario he just pulled.
“Thank you, babe. I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Hmm, i love you.”
You stood cold on your feet. The words are at your tongue, you just have to say it but for some reasons, something’s stopping you.
“Babe?” Jake’s voice snapped you back to reality and you cleared your throat then chuckles.
“S-Sorry, spaced out a little. I l-love you too, Jake. See you later.”
He chuckles, “Okay, cutie. Have a nice day.” and then he ended the call.
The silence and heavy atmosphere enveloping you and Sunghoon are undescribable. You’ve never had something like this with him. Even during your biggest fights, its never been like this.
Slowly, you glanced at him and his eyes looked cold. For a brief moment, it seemed like you saw sadness on it but when he saw you looking he switched it right in. His jaw clenches as he stares right at you, like waiting for you to say something to him.
“U-Uhm, nice seeing you again. See y-you around, Sunghoon.” and you turn your heels, ready to leave him when he said something.
“So it was that easy for you to find someone else, huh? Glad to finally know it.” his words are filled with nothing but slight anger and bitterness.
“Excuse me?” you whipped your head to look at him with furrowed brows.
“You left me and find someone new. It was easy for you.”
“You. Made. Me. Leave. You.” each words was emphasize so you can make your point.
“And what do you know about what I feel? It was not easy for me!” your tone raised because of how he just made you upset with what he said.
“Doesn’t seem like it for me.”
You thought he changed, but clearly he didn’t. You are dumb enough to be shaken by him.
“I’m not having this conversation with you right now.” and you turned around, having the firm decision of leaving and getting him out of your sight.
Two steps and he managed to grab your wrist once again. He sighs, heavy sighs.
“O-Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.” he licked his lips and gently made you face his way.
When he saw through your eyes how he hurt you again with his words, he almost want to hit himself. He already knew what went wrong before. How he fucking messed everything up. How selfish he is. And he doesn't want to repeat the same mistakes once again.
He was always someone whose hard to read. Yes, you are one of the very few people who can understand him right away, who can read through him from time to time and definitely one of the top people who can deal with his shits. Sunghoon’s not really good at showing how he cares to people. He have his own ways of showing them, and he thought that was enough. But he was wrong.
Sunghoon loves you. He loves you so much that he changed a lot ever since you left. He changes his way of thinking and even exerted effort to become someone better for you. It's such a shame that it took him to lose you to realize things.
The thing is no matter how confident he is to a lot of things back then, a part of him was secretly insecure. Insecurities that built up through the journey of having you as his partner. You’re a wonderful person and he always think that he was very lucky to have you. And so the insecurity and fear of losing you gets the best of him.
Being someone whose not expressive and overthinks a lot isn’t a very good combo. Makes him do a lot of stupid things that hurts you so much. He was so regretful of those times and if he can do anything just to go back to fix everything, he will. But he can’t go back. There’s no such thing as time machine.
What he can do is try. Try to make you feel how sorry he was. Try to make you see a different him, a better version of him. The better version that he strive to be just for you. And try to make you feel how much he loves you.
“I’m really sorry for what I did back then.” he started and licked his lips. He kept sighing heavily to ease his nervous feelings, calming his racing heart.
He had rehearsed the words he wants to tell you once he saw you again, but they all became pointless as his mind went blank just by having you standing in front of him.
“Not just the last night we are together,” he felt his heart break by the mention of it. One of the nights he regretted the most. “but I’m sorry for everything. I was so dumb to realize things much faster. I was an idiot for not treating you better.” he licked his lips and stared right to your eyes.
“I love you, y/n. I still do.” the tears pooling your eyes starts to stream down your face.
“The same type of love I feel for you back then. I love you so much that it hurts. It didn’t change at all. It was always you for me.”
Right now, you felt like your heart is being squeezed so hard. These words you wanted to hear from him back then are finally happening. But things are a lot more complicated as it is. Jake’s face flashes through your mind and you can’t take hurting him.
And also because you still feel so hurt he didn’t do anything just to make you stay. Why now? Why now when you’re a little okay already?
Your lips trembles as you open them to speak.
“You know if you only went after me that night, I would’ve stayed. I would not leave you.” you says in your low voice.
His eyes softens and tighten his grip on you. Your eyes dropped at his hand and it took everything in you to unclasp his hold.
“I’m sorry, Sunghoon. A lot of things changed already, but,” your words halted. ‘But I still love you.’ were the words you wanted to say.
You shut your eyes and opens them, trying to hide your real feelings for him.
“I do kind of wish you tried to fix it after we ended. I waited for you.”
You saw him broke and it was so much harder for you. To see him like this is your weakness. You’ve always had a soft spot for him and it will always remain like that.
“Y/n I—” he was cut off when the conference room’s door bursts open.
You quickly wiped off your tears. Thankfully, Sunghoon’s built was enough to cover you from whoever that is.
“I have to go. Good bye.” and without sparing him another glance, you stormed out of the scene. Leaving the place. Leaving Sunghoon and leaving your heart with him.
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The encounter with your ex boyfriend just made you disoriented. You spaced out most of the day and you’re thankful that the people in your workplace just thought you are not feeling well. They didn’t asked much about it and just gives you space.
When Jake came to pick you up, you felt so much worse. His sweet smiles makes you so guilty. It felt so bad. You feel horrible for still having feelings for your ex when he was there with you. Treating you good like how you wanted.
“Jake! My boy!” your Dad’s cheerful voice errupted the whole room as he went to give him a hug.
You watch how he connected with your parents and it made you think about the times with Sunghoon. They’ve never been like that towards him. Your mother’s a little nicer than your Dad, but she never really tries to know Sunghoon as he is a little intimidating for her. That’s what she said.
Your Dad on the other hand just flat out shut his doors for him. After knowing what he does, he straight up dislikes him without even trying to get to know him more.
It made you feel bad for Sunghoon. Just by thinking of how would he react if he saw this scene of your parents warmly welcoming Jake to your home will hurt him like hell. And that’s what you did to him before. You kept on forcing him into this when you knew it was a low case already. You kept rubbing salt to the open wounds your parents had created to him.
“Honey, you all right?” your Mom took notice of your silence. The two guys looked at your way with concerns in their eyes.
You quickly pulled a small smile for them.
“I just don’t feel so well today, Mom.” she coos and cupped your face.
“Oh my cupcake. Let’s go eat already, I’m sure it will be gone once you have your favorite soup.” and she even gave you a hug.
Your Dad caress your arms and asked you two to follow them so you can start eating dinner already. Jake’s hands settles on the small of your back, eyes looking at you with so much concern.
“You okay, baby?”
You nodded with a small smile before he guided you towards the dining area. The dinner started and the three of them were the ones talking most of the time. You tries to join and forcedly laugh from time to time while eating so little. Just to avoid suspicion from them.
“I’m really glad you found Jake, y/n! He’s such a great match for you. Unlike that boy...” the scowl on his face appears for the first time tonight.
Your smile falters and you quickly fell on a foul mood. Your father always hated him. He never saw his efforts.
You lowered your head, doesn’t really want to hear more about it.
“He has a thick face for showing up here in our home multiple times months ago to look for y/n!” he added, sounding so upset about it.
Your hand halted from playing with your food after his words slowly sink into your system. You lift your head and stared at your Dad with furrowed brows.
“Sunghoon went here? When?” you asked in a speed of light. Doesn’t want them to bury this topic.
Your Mom and Jake was surprised to how you reacted.
“A week after you left his sorry ass. You know I was so pissed at him for coming back over and over again even after I told him you don’t want him anymore and that he should just leave you alone. You are better off without him. Maybe he is really just that stupid—”
“Why didn’t you told me this before?” your tone sounded so accusing. The look of betrayal on your eyes burns towards your Father.
“I don’t see the need of mentioning that to you. He’s already out of the picture. I really hate that boy. He’s bad for you. I never understand why you loved someone like him?”
“You never really tried to get to know him so how would you understand?”
“Pardon?” your Father’s expression looked offended by how you said the last sentence.
You stood up abruptly, making a dragging sound from your chair. They all looked at you with confusion on their faces.
“I should’ve known you can do something like that, Dad. I should’ve known Sunghoon will come here to look for me despite knowing that he will get nothing but mistreatment. I should’ve known.” you started marching out from the room and you can hear Jake calling out for you, but you couldn’t care more.
All you can think of was how hard must it been for Sunghoon. Now all his words from a while ago hits you differently. The way his eyes flashes sadness and how he looked so broken just made your heart crack into a million pieces.
He maybe a mess, but he is your mess. He is your person, your other half.
“Y/n hold on,” your steps halted right when you are at the front porch of your house.
Jake went after you and when you saw how scared his eyes and how he looked so broken, it hurts you. But you knew it will just break him more if you continue being with him when your heart clearly belongs to someone else.
“Where are you going?” he asks, even if he knew the answer already.
“I’m really sorry Jake. I love you, really.” you licked your lips and tears pooled the corner of your eyes.
“But I still love him. It’s still him.”
You’ve never seen Jake like this before. You are so used at seeing him smile that seeing him this broken, hurts you so much.
“Are you serious? No...” he chuckles with no humor, blinking rapidly to push those tears back inside his eyes.
“I’m sorry, Jake. You deserve someone who will love you with all their heart and that person is not me.” and you removed his hand from your arm.
A tear left his eyes, but you turned away. You are being selfish again and choosing what will make you truly happy.
After calling a cab, you told the driver the address of your old apartment you shared with Sunghoon. Hoping that he’s still staying in that place, otherwise you will have to go ask his friends.
On the way to him, you realized a lot of things. You realized his little efforts that kept you going through the relationship. You started seeing how he’s imperfectly perfect for you. That despite his flaws, he’s always been the only one who loves you genuinely. The person who will love you even if you fail. The person who you can show your vulnerable side and still think you’re the most wonderful person.
You went out of the cab and just right in time, the rain poured. It reminded you that same night where you ended things with Sunghoon. Starting to get drenched, you walked towards the apartment building that you used to stay in with him. The same apartment that holds so much memories.
On the other hand, inside the apartment, Sunghoon’s brows were hardly furrowed while he head over his door after hearing a doorbell. He's a little confuse as he expects nobody for tonight.
He opens it and quickly, the annoyed expression over his face was replaced with a surprised one.
“Y/n?” he uttered seeing you standing in front of his unit, all drenched.
Your eyes softens at the sight of him. Seeing him in his white plain shirt and black shorts that he always use to wear whenever you two stays inside. You felt so happy seeing him. Your mouth opens to say something but eyes shifted at the back of him.
The relief you felt washes away at the sight of a girl coming out from the comfort room.
“Who is it, oppa?” she asked and you felt so dumb.
You are stoned at your position for a while before starting to step away. You probably looked like a freaking loser being all drenched and crashing to his apartment. Your heart broke again if its possible as it was already broken, then you cleared your throat. Tears streaming nonstop.
“I-I’m sorry. I should’ve not come here...” and you stormed off.
You heard him calling out for you, but you didn’t stop. Trying to save some dignity left in you. The rain is still pouring hard when you arrived outside but you didn’t care. You walked like a lifeless being with no direction to go to. People stared, but you just ignored them. You are hurting so bad and you wished that the rain will wash it away.
“Y/n!” a scream halt your step.
His familiar voice echoes inside your mind and you heard rummaging steps approaching you. You wanted to run and save a face, but you didn’t. Your heart felt so heavy.
Two shoes came into your view and slowly you lift your head up. Sunghoon’s starting to get drenched by the rain too, but like you he seems to not care. His chest rises up and down, trying to catch his breath after running after you. He’s wearing a jacket now on top of his white t-shirt which is useless as its slowly getting wet as well.
You looked at him with broken stares.
“Why are you here?” he asks, hoping that you came here to tell him that you want him back. That you want him as much as he wants you.
Your lips tremble and hot tears brimmed your eyes. It made it a little harder to see his face clearly because of the rain, but you tried hard. Sunghoon notices and stepped closer, head slightly covering your face from the pouring rain as he stares down on you.
“I c-came to tell you that a lot of things already changed,” you started and tried to push away your pride. This time, you wanted to do it right.
“but my feelings for you remained the same. I love you, Sunghoon. I love you so much that my heart felt like it stopped beating when I left you. I love you so much that I knew I will never be the same again after we broke up. I love you so much that I ended things with Jake just so I can be happy again. It’s making me lose my mind, making me act insane. And that’s the way I love you.”
Sunghoon licked his lower lip and the rain was cold, but his heart was warm. God, how he missed feeling this way.
“And I know I hurt you before. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry for leaving that night and for thinking you didn’t try to fix it. I’m really sorry—” your words were cut off when he smashed his lips on yous.
Your hand reached over his clothes, holding it tightly for support system. His kisses started aggressive, like he wanted to do that for so long. Like he’s been deprived of it. The kiss lasted for a while until he leans away to catch his breath, you followed his lips for a few more pecks then his forehead rests on yours.
He cupped your face, warming it using his warm hands. While staring at his eyes, your loving gaze suddenly changed with a glaring eyes.
“What?”
“Who’s that girl at your apartment?” your question are like an interogation.
He smirks and chuckles. He even tries to kiss you, but you leaned away making him whine a little.
“She’s my cousin. She stayed overnight at our apartment after going out with her friends. She’s about to leave now.” you quickly melt when he addressed the apartment as yours and his.
You pout and calmed down. He chuckles and made your noses touch, staring at your eyes loving.
“I love you.” he says, placing another hot kiss on your lips. Your heart aches, but this time in a good way. You felt like you are finally where you should be. Inside his arms.
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jxckchxmpi0n · 1 year ago
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Ethan Landry as spiderman headcannon
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I'm thinking about Ethan as Spiderman ♡
The idea of Ethan as Spiderman makes me giggle.
did not proof read. |m.list
I start college in 4 weeks but more into my dorm in 2 😵‍💫🤮
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Ethan would keep it a secret for as long as he could but one night, he forgot you were coming over, so he was messing around in his suit when you walked in, and he almost shot you with his web.
You yelled at him like a mother, and anytime you would make some smart comment about being a hero, he would hit you with the "Okay, MOOMM"
There would be some nights where if he got hurt pretty badly, he would go to your bedroom window. you would already have the first aid kit on your bed and the window unlocked, waiting for him.
After you found out about his spider side you begged him to take you swinging around the city, but he would say no for weeks until he realized you won't stop asking.
"I'm telling you this now, don't open your mouth unless you want to eat bugs for dinner."
"Yeah, yeah I'll survive bug boy."
When he started to get noticed by the public and people made merch he would 100% buy it and make you and him match when it was movie night
If it was a slow night in crime he would go to your place with wildflowers and tell you his favorite crimes he's stopped
When you guys' hangout he gets bored sometimes so he would start throwing your things and shoot them and web them to your ceiling and see how long it would take you to notice
His favorite thing is when you're across the room and he wants attention from you he would shoot his web across the room around your waist and pull you towards him.
Some nights when you clean his cuts when it's really bad you don't warn him you are cleaning it, so he yelps and slaps your hand away. "OW! that hurt what the hell y/n!"
"Oh, shush bug boy you are fine."
Some days you wanted him to set aside the spider-man persona and be Ethan for one night. Halfway through, it ends up in him running into an ally and swinging through the buildings while you watched.
He would walk around your room... like walk around! Walls and ceiling just walk around like it's normal.
If you were busy doing homework at your desk and he was on your bed, he would crawl on your ceiling and hang over you, wondering when you'd be done. "Are you don't yet?!"
You look up and see his face a few inches away. "No, I'm not, I'm sorry, but I need this to be done tonight, or I won't get it done at all!"
He leaves web messages around town for you.
He let's you play with his web shooters
He left a suit at your house and came over one day to you, trying it on. "Baby- what- what are you doing"
You freeze. "WHAA NOTHING"
He laughs and holds your face "God you're so adorable!" He then kisses your face everywhere.
Sometimes, he lets you be the man woman in the chair.
Making spiderman themed bracelets. He never takes it off!
He would 100% start teaching you fighting moves just because crime has gotten worse
He makes you carry pepper spray which back fired-
He thought it would be funny to scare you one day but you had the pepper spray and you sprayed him
"Ahhhhhhhh OWWW WHAT THE HELL"
You couldn't help but feel terrible at first but once he healed he just acted like a baby.
"I though I'd never see again!"
When he's swinging around town and he see that you see him he waves aggressively.
Even though he's a spider when he sees one he still freaks out.
"Y/N THERES A SPIDER ON YOUR WALL!!!! ITS BIG A GROSS!!!!" He stood on you bed scared.
"Now what did we say? No talking about yourself like that!" He threw a pillow at you while you laughed.
When he catches another criminal he ends up break dancing in his suit.
There is no doubt in the world that this boy would go shopping but mid spree his spider tingles when off and he came home without the food.
"DID YOU FORGET THE FOOD AGAIN???"
He makes uses his webs in school. You don't like when he does but sometimes he does it for you. "Ughh there's only one muffin left" you were close to the end of the line.
He looks around and stretched his arm out activating the webs. He grabbed the muffin and before you can fully blink he put it in your hand. "Love you"
Talks way too much when fighting
Dances in the middle of fighting
Gaslights the criminal
"Oh no not knives please it's my worst fear" he falls covering his face.
"Yeah that's right punk-" he shot his webs ans then just used the robber as shooting practice.
100% makes "pew pew pew" noises when he shoots his webs
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haitanology · 6 months ago
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big-shot ; hanma x fem!reader
warning: smut (mdni) ! oral (f receiving), face-sitting, degradation, sub!hanma, meandom!reader …
!!! note: this is a chapter of a wayyy bigger fic, with very heavy plot and lots of other characters as love interests. you can find it on wattpad under HAITANITE or ao3 as haitanology
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Flickering lights and loud music, getting lost between many bodies swaying to the rhythm —invasive, breaking skin into light sweat.
A perfect formula for the remedy to a chilly summer night.
2017's been treating you well. You are successful, you can buy anything you want and have people answer to you in seconds.
Just like always. A fact meant to be.
Call it destiny, if you will.
Chugging down the rest of your drink, you leave it somewhere you won't remember and make your way to the dancing mass.
Your eyes dart around the room, flicking between different colored shapes that jump and blend in with the dark based club.
You don't spot one that stands out. Tall, a brooding presence who shakes you up by a mere appearance.
Your body begins to follow the flow of the beat, the song wrapping around you as your tongue recalls the lyrics. The words are lost among many, yet your hips keep syncing to the music, closing your eyes and leaving the rest to your heart.
"Your friend's looking for you outside." Somebody whispers behind you, breaking the symphony for he stops you from enjoying yourself.
Not taking a single glance around, leaving the male voice to his own doings, you become one with the crowd as you look for the exit.
Unnoticed, you leave the club.
You've never been there, ever.
A lone car rests outside, parked and tinted dark. You make your way with steady feet, opening the passenger's door and closing it just as quick. The car starts up, carrying the thud and the clicking of your seatbelt along with it.
"You know I can't be seen in public." Hanma's deep voice, playfulness lost with the years, comments.
From the corner of your eye, you watch as he drives with one hand, staring straight ahead. You rest your elbow on the side, supporting your head with your hand; you take a deep breath.
"I know." Your eyes dart to the view from the window, Tokyo's nightlife carried by its luminosity. "I also don't care."
Disinterest follows tiredness, just as silence follows death.
"I don't get why you wanted to meet up," He speaks up against the emptiness you've left. His next words are all over eachother, most unrecognizable. "not that I'm complaining."
Punishment follows sin, the same way sin follows punishment.
He sighs when he doesn't receive an answer. His fingers hold tightens around the steering wheel, the same way his free hand does over your leg.
Sex follows passion, much like passion follows desire.
"Y'know," The strained chuckle he heaves punctures through his chest. "I enjoy myself when I'm with you, I have fun, but it's different."
But does love always follow desire? The same way desire always follows love.
"Different, how?" You follow up, words longer than they should be. Hanma doesn't care, almost grinning at the sound of your voice.
Though, it's only a small smile.
Many things follow love, but love doesn't necessarily have to follow anything. Instead, emptiness fills in for the role; following after them.
Ironically.
"Different than Kisaki."
You grimace, lips twitching at the thought.
"Good," Tapping your chin with a single finger, you blink once. "glad to not compare to that weird ass specimen."
The car stops in front of one of the many business buildings in Tokyo. It stands high with might, most lights turned off due to the recent hours.
Hanma's hand crawls up to your nape, staying there. He turns his head to yours, violet eyes sizing you up before he closes them.
"I don't like when you talk about him like that." He gulps, violet now overshadowed by the darkness of his pupil. "But I'll let it go, just for tonight."
Love follows people, but love doesn't follow you.
Interest does.
Is this why you find yourself in Hanma's spacious apartment, lost in the contact of his lips against yours —tongue following a pattern with his own— as you bask in the slight roughness that comes with his kisses?
Yes, indeed.
In the best way he can, Hanma attempts to lead you to his bedroom between guttered groans that leave his throat everytime your lips move down to his neck.
He heaves a sigh, arm sliding across your waist and bringing you closer to his chest. Your ear presses against his heart, hearing the rapid bumping grow exponentially, in the same way his erection begins to poke your thigh.
Straying your eyes away from his body, they widen at an ajar door that hides an office inside. The light in them glows, your smirk stretching across your face before you are pulled inside Hanma's bedroom.
The cold contact of Hanma's fingers ghosting over your back, break your trance. They grasp your nape, tugging your face closer to his own, his breath caressing your parted lips.
Eyes set on his lips, you tilt your head, ready to taste them again. When Hanma leans in, closing his eyes at the touch of his nose with yours, his breath is cut short.
He gulps, finding himself laying on his bed with you on his lap. Both of your hands rest on his chest, one moving to grip his chin and bring it closer to you.
"I don't care how much power you have over Kisaki's lackeys." You mutter, turning his face around so you do so close to his ear. Your eyes narrow, fingers closing on his face. "You aren't gonna tell me what to do."
Your hand feels the vibration through his chest as Hanma chuckles. Passing one hand through his hair, observing the painted 'Sin' afterwards, his lips form a close smile.
Voice deep as ever, you stay still once you see the gentle smile that carves Hanma's expression. He calls you over, both his index and middle fingers massaging your cheek.
"It's you." He tugs on your bottom lip, dragging it down, fingers following a path to your collarbone. "If it's you, you can do all that you want to me. Use me, for all I care."
Hanma's brows shoot up, his fingers now moving through your trembling lips. His eyes burn, his entire body does, hips bucking into your clothed cunt as his clothes begin to strain him.
"I love being with you," He whispers, helping your hands undo his suit. "it's always so fun."
Words fall on your deaf ears, taking a deep breath before trying to forget who it is you are using.
Your chest hurts, it's tense. You purse your lips, shaking your head unnoticed by Hanma's shut eyes. Your mind shows you the office you've passed by, yet the light in your eyes only dims.
Gritting your teeth, taking Hanma's clothes off gets aggresive, throwing them somewhere along with your own. Taking his cock in your hand, you squeeze it, hearing a yelp from him.
"Shut up!" You bark out, same hand stroking his dick at a rapid pace, not giving him time to word out his thoughts. "Stop talking, just close your useless fucking mouth."
A drop of cold sweat runs down the side of your face, your mind shut as Hanma's groaning and cursing plays a loop in your brain.
"That's it..." You coo out, your voice barely audible. Not that he's paying attention to it, busy with the much needed attention you are paying to his cock, throbbing in delight.
A breathless laugh escapes your lips, smile growing.
"Stop making me feel pity for you, good job."
Swiping your thumb over his tip, wet from the precum coating it, you ignore Hanma's pleads to slow down. You keep pumping, eyes unfocused and pupils dilated.
"M'gonna..." Hanma calls out, biting his lip. "M'gonna cum soon."
Managing to listen to Hanma's slurred words, you blink and your hand stops, moving away from his pulsating cock.
"Huh?!" Hanma's eyes snap open, your hand over his mouth.
You glare down at him, lightly palming his dick, playing with it on your hand.
"You're dumb." Slapping his face without force as you utter each word, you taunt him. "So fucking dumb, it's unbelievable."
"Please—" With a single move of your index finger, now lifted, he stops. You place it over his lips, face hovering over his.
A moan suddenly tries to leave his shut mouth, eyes rolling back at the soft friction of your pussy over his cock. Itching for more, it twitches.
"How many girls have been in the position you are in, with you treating and using them like pathetic little whores?" You question, not expecting an answer; humming when you don't get one.
You take his hand, punishment staring right back at you. You raise it, slapping his face with it, not measuring the strength you used.
"You thought it wouldn't come back to bite you in the ass?"
Hanma's breath grows erratic, eyes close to sparkling at the sight of your pussy over his face.
"At least your mouth will be useful this way."
Unconsciously, his hands move to grab your waist, leading you down to him. A content sigh escapes from your lips when his tongue licks your slit, uttering a silent moan at the touch of your clit and the tip of his nose.
You close your eyes, your mind blank as Hanma's hands glide down to your ass, gripping it while his mouth works on your cunt —just like clockwork.
Grabbing the blonde and black strands of his hair, you tug on them when his nose hits the spot. His tongue laps at your folds, eating and sucking you out as if it's his last meal.
You lean your head back, Hanma's quiet mewling going straight to your pussy, causing you to bite down a whimper.
"I hate that you're so good." You hiss out, hips beginning to rock back and forth on his face —craving more of his tongue lashing out. "Fuck!"
A thrust of his tongue has you cursing out his name, thighs enclosing his head between them. He doesn't care, though, continuing to play with his mouth on your cunt —kissing it, worshipping you.
While your mind, now cleared out from the shock of Hanma's moves, doesn't let you forget why you are here; Hanma's only ongoing thought is how godly you taste, how he doesn't want to stop.
He's pussy drunk. Utterly and completely.
The tip of his tongue licking every crevice, moving a path through the slit to the clit, estimulated by his nose once you move in a certain way. It's all enough to send you over the edge, thighs closing in farther as your eyes roll to the back of your head.
Soon enough, Hanma's lapping at your folds like a cat, tasting your orgasm as his sturdy hands help you ride it out. He licks you clean, audibly gulping and leaving an open mouthed kiss on your cunt, letting you move back to his lap.
Through your panting, you barely listen to Hanma's sultry tone. His tongue passes through his lips, getting all the cum he can get, smiling at you.
"Best meal of my life." His blown out pupils take a look at your naked body that he didn't get to see before, salivating at the sight. "Did I do a good job?"
You run a hand down your face, covering the lower part with your palm. Your head's pounding, actively playing thoughts like a broken record.
There's a scratch, and you blink, hiding the light coat of water that covers your eyes. You curse, averting them away from Hanma's awaiting face.
"No, no you didn't." You take his hands, leading them away from your body and holding them together by the wrists. "It's infuriating..."
The words die out in your throat, mutter lost before Hanma can hear it.
"Wha—What?" He breathes out, panicked eyes growing bigger at the clicking of your tongue. Hanma can't stop the loud moan that breaks out of him when you sink down on his cock, shouting at him through short puffs.
"You're so fucking useless, it makes me sick!"
Hanma can't process what you spat out to him, busy writhing from the pleasure that rains down on him with the way you're riding him.
A single hand stops his own from moving, Hanma perfectly capable of breaking that hold, yet he can't. Your hips move up and down, rocking on him and sending a knot tempted to break at the slightest move through his body, washing down on him.
"S'good..." He mumbles, tongue poking out from his lips. "You're s'fucking good, keep—"
You moan when his tip hits the perfect spot, closing your mind from any intrusive thoughts.
Hanma joins you, begging for more.
"Faster, please—" Though you can't hear his pleads, nor the way he tells you he's about to cum, deprived of it throughout the entire night.
You are in bliss, squeezing your eyes shut and following the same pattern, letting the tip of his painfully throbbing cock send you to a state where you can't think, where your brain doesn't take over.
You keep chasing after your release, ignoring Hanma's still hips, who have stopped meeting your own; leaving you full of his cum, legs trembling before you from the harsh orgasm he's having.
You don't give him time to recuperate, bask in the aftermath, mercilessly pounding on his now softening cock to keep going. Hanma's brows furrow, the ache in his body increasing with your pace.
"S—stop, hey..." He trails off, not able to pronunciate correctly due to the fog that covers his brain. "Please, I—I can't take it."
Hanma's eyes widens when his hands are free, your hand now wrapped around the lower part of his face, not letting him continue. Through blurry eyes, a single tear running down the side to the pillow, he's able to see his own cum leaking out of you, followed by your own as you finally reach your orgasm —huffing out a broken sigh, your back arching ignoring the buckling of your knees.
Hanma groans, the pain subsiding and now able to rest. In a starfish position, missing the heat of your body as it leaves his lap, his sight begins to obscure.
He hasn't experienced something quite like this ever, not with any woman he's had a chance with.
He's said it before, you've always been something else. It explains why his heart can't calm down once you're with him, or why a strange heat burns through his chest everytime he thinks about you.
Because in all these years, he's never not thought about you.
He can't put a name to the feeling, yet deep inside him he knows.
He knows because, before passing out from the ecstasy of the sex, he has the strong urge to have you in his arms. Since he doesn't understand why so many tears are streaming down your face.
Is he not good enough?
He'll never get to know, sadly.
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thanks for reading <3 as a reminder, you can find the full fic (my ordinary life ; tokyorev x reader) on wattpad (HAITANITE) or ao3 (haitanology)
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kaziwi · 1 year ago
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I don't know if you accept angst, so I kind of have two requests. In case you write anguish, I wanted to ask: Ace x f!reader, after marineford ace survives and he ended up isolating himself and thinking only about getting stronger and the reader is always asking them to rest, but he never does and someday, he ends up losing patience with the reader and they end up drifting apart
sif you don't write anguish, I have the same request but instead of Ace losing his temper with the reader, he will like the reader's actions and become more clingy.
If you don't like it, just delete or ignore this request.
Hii!! I am so sorry for the wait!! I'm not too good with angst, so I hope this is okay. I hope you enjoy!!
Drifting Apart
Character(s): Ace
WC: 523
Summary: Ace wants to focus on getting stronger after Marineford, but you just want things to go back to normal (angst)
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Ace made sure to lock the door before his workout, he didn't need anyone bothering him. He moved all his weights to his room, he couldn't have the rest of the crew distracting him. He started lifting his weights, slowly adding more to his training regiment each day. He didn't care how, but Ace knew he had to keep getting stronger.
At first Ace didn't hear the small knocks at his door, but once they turned into loud thuds, he put down his weights and opened the door.
"What," he said annoyed, not realizing it was you until he fully opened the door. When he saw it was you he mumbled a quick apology and let you in. You were carrying a tray of food with a small smile on your face.
"Hey," you started, "I brought you lunch...you missed it...again.."
"Oh...thanks, you can just leave it on my desk," Ace said as he turned back to his weights.
You set the food down and turned to him. Ace had shut himself off from the rest of the crew after the war, and only focused on getting stronger. Ace was your commander, so of course you supported him, but he also was your boyfriend, and you knew this wasn't good for him.
"How about you take a break for lunch? We could go outside on the deck and have a little picnic?" You suggested, hoping he'd take the offer.
"No thanks," he said, still focused on his weights. You were getting a little annoyed at this point. You'd been bringing him his meals for almost 2 weeks straight, which you didn't mind, but with this attitude he was giving you, it almost felt like you were his maid.
"Ace I really think you should take a break. Its been awhile since you've been on deck and everyone misses you and-"
"I said no thanks," this time his voice getting sterner. You thought about giving up and leaving him alone, but you were too determined to stop.
"Come on Ace it'll be fun we can-"
"JUST SHUT UP!"
You stood there with a shocked look on your face. You and Ace rarely ever fought and he had never once raised his voice at you. You were at a loss of words, not sure what to say.
"Look Y/N...." he started, "I didn't mean to yell..."
"No Ace, you need to stop this. I understand you want to get stronger, but you need to rest."
"I'll be fine."
"But you won't be, please everyone is worried, just let us help you..."
"I don't need your help."
After hearing those five words, you had enough. You left his room and slammed the door without saying anything. The next few days when dropping off his food you knocked quickly and left the tray outside. Soon you stopped dropping off his food all together, and left it to the rest of the crew to handle. Slowly you both drifted more and more apart, till you stopped seeing each other completely. You still cared for Ace....but until he apologize you refused to speak to him.
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truetogaia · 2 years ago
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i saw ur post about sub!jake, imma be waiting for that fic ‼️ ur literally writing has me a chokehold bae
I'm just gonna post it answering you bc I can hihihii I LVOE U
Pairing: Sub!Jake Sully x Fem!Reader
Genre: smut, 18+
Warnings: Blowjob, strong language, explicit and mature themes, like use of "Good boy" once, I don't see how thats a warning but YK
Synopsis: Jake is needy thats all
Notes: It's 2:40 am and I JUST finished it, please excuse any bad grammar, i'll edit and fix it tomorrow *SOB* It also lowkey sucks bc IM STILL SUFFERING FROM WRITERS BLOCK IT WONT GO AWAY!!
Word count: around 600!!
Jake’s breathy moans filled your ears as you skillfully planted sloppy kisses along his neck, occasionally letting your sharp fangs drag across his hot, tender skin. His form trembled slightly beneath you, your hand busy tracing gentle shapes up and down his shaft. He mewled when you carefully ran your thumb against his slit, his hips bucking into your hand. 
You cherished these moments, adored how obedient and submissive he was, how his ears flicked around intently, listening to every word that seeped from your mouth. But the one thing that made it so satisfactory for you, was that you were able to give him pleasure. The look on his face when he finally reached his climax was etched into the walls of your memories, and you were obsessed with it. 
“Please,” his voice was croaky from the hours you had spent teasing his poor, neglected cock, “stop teasn’.. can’t take it anymore y/n- hmnn” You smiled up at him, finally wrapping your warm hands around the base of his needy length. His mouth fell ajar as your smaller hands worked his precum along his shaft, choked moans escaping his throat with each stroke. 
You placed a light peck on his angry tip, increasing the speed of your hands, before finally taking it into your wet mouth. The sounds of you gagging on his big cock made Jake’s moans increase in volume, his hands finding a place to sit on top of your braids. You swirled your tongue around his bulbous tip, which earned a loud groan from your mate. You looked up at him through your heavy eyelashes, doe eyes sparkling with stinging tears from taking so much of him, and he swore he could cum right there.
“You’re s’good to me baby, mmm, so so good..” His hips lifted from the ground subconsciously, jerking his cock further into the warmth of your hot mouth. You felt his hands grip your hair tightly, and you braced yourself. Jake was so needy, so desperate for release that you finally decided to let him take control. He began pounding his thick length into your mouth, forcing you to deepthroat him. 
His tip abused the same spot in the back of your throat with each lustful thrust of his snapping hips, and you were sure it was going to leave a bruise. “Oh baby, yes, fuck- hnghhh.. your mouth is so good-” His heavy balls slapped against your chin with each buck, thrusts turning erratic as he fucked himself deeper down your sore throat. His orgasm was approaching rapidly and he could no longer control the noises and moans leaving his mouth. 
You held out for as long as you could, but considering you couldn’t get any air with the way your nose was basically buried in Jake’s abdomen, your vision was fading bit by bit. The feeling of Jake’s hot seed finally releasing itself into your welcoming mouth made you jump. When he was finished, he slowly pulled out of your mouth.
“Sorry, baby.. I got a bit carried away. I didn't hurt you, did I?.” His eyes carried a genuine, apologetic look, and a warm smile settled on your features. You placed a hand on his thigh, lifting yourself up to stand above him. 
“No, It’s okay, love. You were a good boy anyway.” He looked up at your figure with an admiring gaze, taking in all of your ethereal curves and shapes. And just like that, his cock was rock hard again.
RAHH ITS SO BAD ONCE AGAIN IM SORRY IDK WHATS GOING ON WITH MY WRITING MMMMM IM GONNA CRY and now im going to bed goodnight ♡
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