#like i’m sure they are good it just isn’t for me :)

[puck-luck]

Hi, girly. I hope I find you fine.

I'd like to make a request with Quinn. Could you write something where reader is feeling down, like after a day of dealing with friends/family drama and she is just drained, plus they are at the lake house and yk all the boys are there but she doesn't feel like having dinner or hanging out with them, she just wants to cuddle and recharge and Q just excuses himself to be with her and hopefully makes her feel better.

Thank you so much 💓

warnings: cockwarming. that's IT. other than that, it's just domestic bliss.

pairing: quinn hughes x fem!reader

word count: 1,229

note: thank you @skylershines for requesting this! sorry it took me a while to finish :,) this ask wasn't inherently sexual, but since i am a smut writer, i had to throw in a sexual element or two. i am not THE fluff girl on tumblr dot com LOL but love you girly

The boys are downstairs making a ruckus about something. You’re starting to wonder if they ever tire themselves out, or if they’re always full of energy like this. The day has been long and chock-full of activities and you’re… rather exhausted.

Maybe it’s because of all the sun you soaked up on the boat that’s making you sleepy. Maybe it’s the swimming you did or the wine with the big, filling, home-cooked meal that Quinn made. Maybe it’s from the flight from Vancouver to Michigan two days ago that’s making you so tired. Maybe it’s the knowledge that you’re working from home– Quinn’s home– tomorrow and you can’t dedicate all your time to the fun happenings in the vacation home.

All in all, you don’t know what the root of your exhaustion is, but you know that there’s no way you want to leave this bed again today. You’re due for a good rot. You’ve got a book in hand and you’re all tucked in beneath the covers and the fact that it’s only 7:30pm doesn’t matter to you one bit. The sun hasn’t even started to set, but here you are, ready for bed.

Between the lines in your book, you can piece together what the boys are talking about downstairs. Trevor wants a bonfire. Jack and Luke want to go wakesurfing. Alex doesn’t care, but he wants someone to make a decision. Cole wants to stay in and play ping pong. You’re secretly hoping that the fact that you can’t really hear your boyfriend arguing with his brothers and friends means that he’ll be coming upstairs to join you soon.

It isn’t long before you hear feetsteps padding up the stairs and making their way towards the bedroom you share with Quinn. You continue reading, paying no mind to the man entering the room, but there’s a hint of a smile on your face. 

“Hey,” Quinn greets in a low, relaxed tone. He kisses the top of your head, hovering by your side of the bed. “The boys want to do something. Are you up for it?”

Not really. “What do they want to do?” you ask, not sure if they’d come to an agreement by the time Quinn joined you upstairs. You don’t really want to join the boys, but you don’t want to seem like a spoilsport during your first trip to the lakehouse. Being a recluse won’t get you any favors, no matter how much Quinn likes you. You might be able to go downstairs and sit by a bonfire or watch from the couch while the boys play ping pong. Sitting on the boat wouldn’t be that bad, but you’d have to change out of your pajamas (a cute little slip that you packed just for Quinn). You also know that “one hour on the boat” never actually means one hour on the boat. It always stretches into two or three. So, really, you’d rather stay in.

“Thinking about going out on the boat,” Quinn replies, because you’re really not that lucky when it comes down to it.

Again, you’re faced with a dilemma: you can go with them and feel tired and cranky or you can stay here and feel like you’re not being a good girlfriend by joining the group. There’s not really a good option. At least in this bed, you’ll be warm.

“I kind of just want to stay in bed, if that’s okay,” you tell Quinn with a small shrug. “But I don’t want them to think that I’m boring or anything. I’m just tired.”

Quinn lets out a laugh. “They don’t think you’re boring. Are you okay, though? I know your ‘just tired’ can mean something else sometimes.”

He’s so sweet. You’ve been with Quinn less than a year, but he’s still managed to note your idiosyncrasies and moods perfectly. “I’m okay, sweet boy.”

“Do you want me to stay?”

A wave of affection passes through you. “Do what you want, Q. You choose. I won’t say no to cuddling you all night, but don’t stay on my account.”

“Just let me tell the guys to go without me,” Quinn replies. He leans down and meets your lips. “Then I’ll be back.”

He departs, but his return is quick. He brings his own book and gets into his pajamas– nothing but his boxer shorts– before joining you under the covers. Quinn throws an arm over your shoulders and opens his book, settling in.

You read together in silence for a little while. You start to get bored and allow yourself two more chapters– after checking to see just how long those chapters were, six and eight pages respectively– before you close your book and set it on the nightstand. You slide down the bed a bit, wrapping your arm around Quinn’s waist and squishing your cheek against his chest. 

Quinn rubs your arm. “Sleepy, babe?” he asks.

You hum, turning your face into his bare skin and planting a kiss there. “You’re warm.”

Quinn breathes out a laugh. He pulls you closer; you’re practically on his lap now. You might as well finish the job and get comfortable, so you straddle Quinn and bury your face in his neck, kissing the skin there. Quinn brings his hand to your back and runs his fingers up and down the expanse of it in soothing motions. 

It tickles at first, making you squirm. After a minute or so, you relax into the touch– and a few minutes after that, you find yourself grinding down against Quinn’s rapidly-filling cock.

“Quinn,” you murmur in his ear. You pull back and meet his eyes, trying to convey what you want with just a look. 

You don’t want much. You’re still tired and drained from the day, completely washed out from the swimming and boating and sunbathing you’d been thinking of earlier. All you want is to have Quinn close.

“Yeah,” he replies with a nod. He sets his book aside and encourages you to kneel up just enough that he can slide the waistband of his boxers down and free his cock. 

Greedily, you try to grind against his shaft as soon as it’s free, but Quinn halts you with a soft touch from his free hand. 

He fists the base of his cock and pulls the crotch of your panties to the side, using the pads of his deft fingers to spread your folds. His eyes are hooded and loving as his tip breaches your hole, and he starts to smile when you sink down and settle against him. 

“Oh,” you breathe out once you take him fully, clenching down and loosening your grip on his cock a few times before melting into Quinn. 

“Sweet girl,” Quinn praises in the tone that’s just for you. He plants his hands on your hips and kisses your lips.

Neither of you make an effort to move. In fact, you find yourself growing very drowsy in Quinn’s comforting arms. His distinct, tender touch has your head lulling forward, falling against his shoulder. Quinn breathes deeply and you follow, matching him. The smell of his bodywash fills your nose and you close your eyes, taking another breath.

It’s not inherently sexual, having Quinn’s cock inside you and his lips on your skin. It is, however, exactly what you needed after such an exhausting day.

[celestiamour]

‧₊˚✧ ❛[ two girls in the cut ]❜

━━━ .°˖✧ requested by anon┊edit creds to ilovemode1ling ˚₊ ⊹

ft. kang sae-byeok, se-mi x f! reader — squid game

╰₊✧ how sae-byeok & se-mi would compete for your affections in the games┊1.5k words

setting: season 2 timeline!! au where sae-byeok is also a winner!! contains: gay gay homosexual gay, useless lesbians be upon ye, jealousy, reader is an oblivious sweetheart

➤ author's note: god, imagine them as a duo together, they would have been so powerful!!

╰₊✧ when sae-byeok reluctantly agreed to return to that damned island with gi-hun to put an end to the games, she expected to be faced with more blood and death, but not to find herself falling for the cute girl she saved during “red light, green light.” she knew she was done for when she looked into your fearful eyes and felt crushed at the thought of you being unable to make it without her, and despite telling herself she wasn’t going to get attached like she did last time, she was unable to push you away or keep her distance when you ended up following her like a lost puppy. behind her stoic demeanor, she quickly developed a noticeable soft spot for you where she was mostly stone-faced around others and kind towards you (noticeable, as in, everyone around her noticed this except for you because you didn’t know if she was kind in a platonic way or a romantic way because that’s sapphic experiences for you).

╰₊✧ and as if grappling with her complicated inner feelings and trying to ensure that both of you (and her basically adopted father and everyone else in the alliance, but especially you) survived, she soon noticed that there was another young woman who was also smitten by your charms and was out in an open attempt to woo you. she can’t remember any moment she took her eyes off of you for you to meet se-mi without her noticing, but one thing is for certain, and it’s that if she didn’t start making moves of her own, she would see you get swept off your feet by this new girl.

╰₊✧ se-mi is bold and flirtatious, confident in herself, making her advances clear as day, and being damn good at making you flustered with a single statement. it would almost be impressive if the twisting feeling of jealousy wasn’t there every time her treasured time with you was interrupted each time she came to join your guys for every meal, and of course, you welcomed her with open arms each and every time because you didn’t know about their little unspoken rivalry. 

“they don’t give us enough food in here,” you whined, shuffling around the grains of white rice with your chopsticks, “you would think that with the millions and millions of won we could win, they would give us more than one meal a day that isn’t overcooked… i’m still hungry…”

as soon as that last statement left your lips with a pout, sae-byeok grabbed her unopened carton of milk and turned to hand it over to you, only to find that se-mi was also holding out her given milk for you to take. there was a moment of awkward silence between the two as the feeling of competition hung in the air, waiting for you to give the point by accepting one of their pints over the other.

however, you simply took both of them at the same time with a wide smile, completely oblivious to the tension, “aw, you guys are so nice to me! are you sure? i don’t want you guys to be hungry just because i took both your milks.”

“don’t worry about it, i’m lactose intolerant anyway,” se-mi assured. “i’m pretty sure everyone else here is too, that’s korea for you.”

you hummed cheerfully as you opened up the little thin cardboard package and drank the milk inside. usually you wouldn’t drink so much of it and you weren’t sure if it was healthy, but your stomach was grumbling like you were testing in a quiet classroom back in high school so you didn’t think it would be too bad to drink some extra to fill up for the couple of days you would be here.

all the while, the two women are staring each other down, one with a little smirk on her face, and the other with a blank glare. 

╰₊✧ every time you ask to use the restroom, you’ll magically find both of them at your side arguing as calmly as possible about who should go with you. outside of the island, girls already go do their business in pairs or groups for safety, but it’s especially true here because most people are too scared to be vulnerable here alone when they are being watched by guards with rifles, even the men. while they quarrel over this one stupid thing, you probably end up going with jun-hee who also needed to go while they’re unable to make up their minds.

╰₊✧ sae-byeok is maybe a tad bit insecure about her mannerisms compared to se-mi’s. she’s expressionless most of the time and struggles so much to put how she feels into words, often coming off as not caring or sometimes even brash. thankfully, you don’t take it the wrong way and understand without her needing to tell you that she cares in her own special way. if she didn’t, then why would she bother making a beeline for you every game to ensure that you were safe with a hand possessively wrapped around your waist? she’s more than willing to put herself in danger to protect you because she already knows what to expect having played these games before and also has the alliance looking out for her.

╰₊✧ speaking of the alliance, they all know about her crush on you although they are too intimidated by her to tease her directly for it. dae-ho gives tips on how to impress you using his experience growing up with his sisters and hearing about their dating lives. gi-hun blatantly asks you if you have a boyfriend, and when you bashfully say you don’t, he then asks if you have a girlfriend because you guys could die any day here, why bother to play the long game? (sae-byeok definitely smacks him though because she feels like she could die from embarrassment, but at least she got the answer “not yet” which means you’re open to dating another girl.)

╰₊✧ oh god, mingle is a nightmare because the two of them refuse to part with you during the final round, their voices ringing clear above all of the music and chaos while they have a tight grip on both your arms. sae-byeok ended up being the bigger person and running off with someone else as se-mi pulled you into safety. 

╰₊✧ they bicker constantly over the little things when it comes to you, which is surprising considering how chill they seem in terms of attitude, only letting up when you start pouting and offer a compromise which they begrudgingly agree to. 

╰₊✧ se-mi is well aware that sae-byeok also has feelings for you, evident by the way she always lingers behind you like an overprotective guard dog and not–so-subtly stares daggers into her every time she approaches you, but doesn’t mind a little competition. she actually finds it to be a nice distraction from everything going on, living out the life as the second female lead in a yuri love triangle fanfiction. in another life where you met in different circumstances, se-mi would take courting you a lot more seriously, but her main goal at the moment is surviving, and whatever comes next is an afterthought. 

“you know…” se-mi started, staring up blankly at the ceiling, and catching sae-byeok’s attention. this was the first time they had a conversation without you, one-on-one, while everyone else was dead asleep. “i don’t really think all three of us are going to make it out of here together…”

similar to how they couldn’t decide who should accompany you to the restroom, they also couldn’t decide who should watch over you in case a fight broke out like in the last game. in the end, they both stayed up sitting in their bunks next to yours, focusing on not falling asleep before the other did because it would determine who was fit for the job. 

she stayed silent as the weight of her words sunk in, allowing se-mi to continue, “if anything happens to me, you’ll look after her, right? i don’t plan on going anytime soon, but… anything can happen in a place like this…”

“... only if you take care of her in case anything happens to me…”

her eyes wandered in the dark, first fixating on your slumbering body with your chest steadily rising to the beat of your breathing, then meeting the eyes of se-mi. there was a mutual understanding that didn’t need to be said, and then the two of them finally sighed before going to bed. there’s a certain relief in knowing your loved one is in good hands if the universe has other plans for you.

╰₊✧ what they don’t know is that your oblivious nature is a facade, you’re freaking out because of the insane gay panic these two ridiculously attractive women are giving you and you would be unable to choose if held at gunpoint. in just a few more days, you hope, you’ll able to come to terms with your feelings and decide who you really fell in love with when you care so intensely for both of them. all you have to do before then is survive, which shouldn’t be too difficult, right?

hey guys, imagine if sae-byeok actually saved se-mi and then they all run out together and have a happy poly relationship yipee

request was as follows:

okay hear me out. im a se mi and saebyeok girly.. i was wondering if you could make a cute little semi x reader x saebyeok (s2 squid games timeline maybe? ur choice :3c) where semi n saebyeok are in a bit of a rivalry because they both adore reader! they might fight over things like who would have night guard duties with reader, offer reader food at the same time, etc! (i love ur writing sm btw ♡)

[rafesweetie]

track vii. MISS AMERICANA & THE HEARTBREAK PRINCE! (feat. rafe x pogue!princess!reader)

“the storm is coming but, it’s you and me,”

you weren’t sure rafe was capable of being kind.

he was always somewhat sweet to you, the kook often referring to you as ‘his pogue’, the only one he likes. but he always spoke lowly about your friends, and it hurt you.

you stopped bringing the pogues up for a while, not wanting to start any arguments between you and your boyfriend. in fact, you’d stopped hanging out with them in general.

rafe enjoyed having you all to himself, bringing you to the country club (much to your dismay), to prove you’re not all pogue, you have some class in you. and you were ever so happy to spend time with him, it wasn’t like you didn’t adore him, but putting on this fake act to please him wasn’t your vibe, all because you were nervous that he wouldn’t like you as much if you were full-pogue, like your friends that hates.

one day, pope heyward calls you, starting it off asking how you are, that you need to hang out soon, but then he asks for money, because your friends business isn’t going so well. the business that you declined working at, even though you helped find the gold.

“i’m a pogue like you pope, don’t have any,”

“yeah, but your boyfriend does.” was his answer.

nervously, you wait a few days until rafe’s having a good day. once you know he’s happy, you butter him up with homemade cupcakes and kisses and sex, until you’re sure he’s happy enough not to blow up on you.

“hey rafey?” you ask gently when the two of you are cuddled up on the couch, watching him scroll through his phone.

he sets down his phone to be present, knowing something’s up. “yeah, princess?”

“um, my friends called,” you start. “the pogues,”

“yeah?” he coaxes the hesitant words out of you.

“they need money for their business.”

“jesus,” he sighs, throwing his head back on the couch.

you sigh with him. “s’really important, for their shop,”

“their stupid-ass little business? it’s gonna go down with or without my money, baby,”

“don’t you feel at least a bit bad? they’re hopless without us, ‘n their my friends, and it’s like my team is losing or whatever—“

“your team? still picking fuckin’ sides? go out with a kook, but hate me, i get it,”

“rafe, i didn’t say that!” you whine. “i don’t really wanna fight, nobodies gonna win. i just feel like out of every kook i know, you’re the only one who seems to care at least a little about the pogues, and your sister, and they need us. they can pay you back,”

“yeah, obviously they will,” he sighs. “i’ll go in tomorrow, okay? i’ll give them my business card, see what me and them can figure out. will it make you happy?”

“yes, it will,” you answer.

“then i’ll do it.”

you smile and cuddle more into him when he says that.

“as long as you’re happy,” he murmurs. “you and me, okay? that’s my whole world.”

[seitmai]

“Because of how you went about all of this. I know you were desperate, and I get the drive behind some of your actions now,” you said, which you refused to excuse. You got it but couldn’t excuse it. “Your response of ‘where’s the fun in that?’ when I said you couldn’t just ask me out like a normal person? You almost seemed to delight in intimidating me. Why?" If you saved his mom, why do this?

💔💔💔

“I didn’t delight in that. I played it wrong,” he admitted in a quiet voice, surprising you. “I approached it like…” “Like everything else in your life where you have everyone under your thumb through fear. You did the same thing to me.” You laughed just a little. “In a way, it worked because I’m officially afraid to try to leave you.” “I don’t want you to fear me or what we have,” he whispered, reaching for you as you scooted back.

Uff I think it's too late for that 🫣

“What we have? Tell me, do you think your mom would be proud of your actions to obtain me or ashamed?” You couldn’t believe that was the kind of man she raised, to put fear into the heart of the person he supposedly loved.

I'm sure she would not be happy

How could you truly fall in love with him when he orchestrated everything from the start? “Feelings or not you’re still going to force me to move in with you soon, and that scares me,” you said. Your wings would forever be clipped.

Like a bird in a gilded cage

“If you can cancel or reschedule it,” he replied. You stared hard at him. Where was that coming from? “No, it's tomorrow, and I’m not cancelling or rescheduling. And don’t you dare use Zemo as an excuse to get your way,” you snapped. Even if it was a valid reason, you didn’t want to hear it.

His audacity has no bounds

The blonde stared straight ahead. “That isn’t my decision,” he said apologetically. Your shoulders slumped. For a short time, you thought he could be on your side or at least help give you some slack. “Right. Because you don't get to make decisions, and neither do I. You’re a bodyguard, I’m just a doll,” you said, looking straight ahead, too, and pulling your hand back when Bucky tried to take it. “Please, don’t.”

I get her frustration...

“I’m sure I’ll take her up on that soon,” you said, turning your head to glare at Bucky. While his expression was stoic, his eyes told you he didn’t want you to be upset with him. “And make sure she adds an inconvenience fee to the damaged wall bill. She’ll know what I mean.”

A hefty one at that!

You didn't speak until Ray walked past you to get his car. “You’re trying to get me to cancel my day out with my friends, after you went through the whole charade of buying me a new dress for it and everything. And after what you told me about your mom.” You took a breath to try to calm down. “Yeah, I’m upset, and yeah, you’re supplying me with the very bricks to build that wall.”

Period!

“Because even arguing with you makes me happy,” he sincerely stated. “And now all I want to do is find a way to put a smile back on your face.”

Good god something is so wrong with his understanding of love🫣🥴

Silence filled the vehicle. “So, you know the truth,” he said after a minute, his voice neutral. “Are you okay?” “I’m trying to be,” you answered carefully. You really were. “That’s all you can do,” he said before adding under his breath, “No good deed goes unpunished.”

For real 🥴

“Too nice for someone like Bucky Barnes,” he muttered, his smile disappearing completely.

👀

“Wait, you’re already home?” he asked. The background noise suddenly stopped. “Did you get a cab? Please tell me you didn’t walk back to your place.” “…Fine, I won’t tell you that.”

Hahah the perfect answer

“I’ll…” you began, steadying yourself. Natasha said you had power, and maybe you’d have to test that sooner than you expected. “Stay at your place tonight .”You could hear a pin drop from the quiet. “You’ll stay the night?” he asked, his voice moving like lava through your veinspp. “Yes,” you whispered, hammering the nail in the coffin.

At what cost 😬

Hold You Tight: Part 16

Pairing: Club Owner!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Fic Summary: The owner of The 107th wants you to be his girl whether you like it or not.

Part 15 | Series Masterlist | Part 17

Chapter Word Count: Over 5.4k

Chapter Summary: Bucky tries to pull you closer when you want to pull away, and someone else in your life my not take no for an answer.

Chapter Warnings: DARK AU, arguing, tension, slight harassment, kissing, reference to stalking, inner turmoil, manipulation, Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?), more warnings to come.

A/N: More Hold You Tight! Thank you for sticking with me! Bucky edit by the beautiful @nixakimbo ❤️ Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby but any and all mistakes are my own. Divider by the talented @firefly-graphics. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

Bucky traded lazy kisses with you as your tears slowed, and you had no idea if it was his mouth that had your heart pounding and the crushing weight of everything that surrounded him. It was so much to unpack. Every encounter with him seemed to be that way. Something blindsided you or suffocated you, but you hadn't been at all prepared for what he just shared. And how could you? He didn't keep photos of his mother around, and you hadn't gone poking around online.

Would you have found out the truth if you had?

He followed your lips when you pulled away. “It’s okay,” he whispered, pulling you back in.

It wasn’t okay. Nothing was okay. Though it partially made sense now why he was moving so fast. He believed if he met you then that you would've fallen in love and been together to this day. Because he didn't seek you out then and lost so much time, he was packing everything into a rushed time span. Dating, meeting his friends, getting you into his place. He was moving things along at an accelerated speed, and you were barely keeping up with the ride.

“No.” The muffled word against his lips somehow rang out loud and clear enough for him to stop, but you put a hand on his chest in case he tried to lean in again. “Why are you punishing me?”

His eyes rounded. “You think I’m punishing you? Jesus, why would you think that?”

“Because of how you went about all of this. I know you were desperate, and I get the drive behind some of your actions now,” you said, which you refused to excuse. You got it but couldn’t excuse it. “Your response of ‘where’s the fun in that?’ when I said you couldn’t just ask me out like a normal person? You almost seemed to delight in intimidating me. Why?”

If you saved his mom, why do this?

“I didn’t delight in that. I played it wrong,” he admitted in a quiet voice, surprising you. “I approached it like…”

“Like everything else in your life where you have everyone under your thumb through fear. You did the same thing to me.” You laughed just a little. “In a way, it worked because I’m officially afraid to try to leave you.”

Had things blossomed between you two organically, you’d like to believe that things would’ve been better. Healthy. There was always the chance that a relationship might’ve come to an end because life was like that. But if he frightened you enough to stay forever, he’d never have to worry. The stars would still align as far as he was concerned.

“I don’t want you to fear me or what we have,” he whispered, reaching for you as you scooted back.

“What we have? Tell me, do you think your mom would be proud of your actions to obtain me or ashamed?” You couldn’t believe that was the kind of man she raised, to put fear into the heart of the person he supposedly loved.

He flinched. Actually flinched. You might as well have raised a hand to him. “She…” He swallowed. “She would’ve wanted us together.”

“Like this? By you not giving me a choice?” you asked, pushing yourself up. “I need to go home.” There would be no getting through to him and this revelation was doing your head in. One cup of coffee wasn't enough either.

He got up to follow you. “Why are you rushing off?”

“I have a shift today, and I have to go home and shower,” you said, grabbing some of your things. “Don’t worry about dropping me off. I’ll get a cab.”

“What? No, you-”

“You put money in my account, so it’s not like I have to worry about paying for it. And it’s not like I’ll be alone either since you’ll have me followed whether I want it or not,” you said as a matter of fact.

“You’re putting a wall up,” he said, frowning as you grabbed your phone charger before he could. “Don’t shut me out, please.”

“I’m not shutting you out. I’m trying to process the gigantic bombshell you dropped on me,” you said, stopping to look at him when he grabbed your arm. “Bucky-”

“This has been a lot, all of it, but we can’t go back and change it, and you know I can’t let you go because we’re meant to be together,” he said, his eyes searching yours. “You feel it. I know you do.”

How many times would he say that until you agreed? “Just because you think fate stepped in-”

“Fate brought you into my club, but I gave it a much-needed push to bring us together after leaving things to chance for so long,” he said, tugging you closer and putting his other hand on your cheek. “You can’t tell me you don’t care about me in some capacity. You’re just afraid to admit it because it isn’t conventional in your eyes, but you don’t have to be afraid of how you feel.”

How could you truly fall in love with him when he orchestrated everything from the start? “Feelings or not you’re still going to force me to move in with you soon, and that scares me,” you said. Your wings would forever be clipped.

“We should’ve been living together and married by now,” he argued, keeping a tight hold on you. “I know I’m making you move in sooner than you want, but beyond safety it’ll give us a chance to really know each other before we get married.”

Talk of marriage had your heart thudding. The man would probably force you to marry him sooner than you wanted. “You said you already know everything about me,” you said. At least he thought he knew you. The vision of you he built up in his mind scared you, too. He couldn’t keep you on that pedestal.

“But you don’t fully know me yet, and I don’t know what it’s like to live with you. The experience will bring us closer together.” His smile was full of hope. “We can read together, do movie nights, dance in the kitchen.”

“Bucky-”

“We can exercise together, in and out of bed,” he continued, your breath hitching as he rubbed his nose against yours. “Don’t you already feel closer to me now that you know we're meant to be?”

A quick knock on the door followed by a long one saved you from answering. “It isn't check-out time, is it?”

“No. That would be Ray,” Bucky headed to the door and kept you back a small distance before he answered. The man really was protective, wasn't he?

“I’m sorry to intrude,” Ray said, giving you a polite nod before he leaned in and whispered something to Bucky. Whatever was said to him made his face harden. The entire change in his demeanor worried you.

“Kotyonok, let’s get your bag and get you back to your place so you can get ready for work,” he suggested, his smile tight.

“What’s the matter?” you asked.

“I’ll tell you later,” he answered, kissing your forehead. “And before we go, I know you suggested taking a cab, but please let Ray take you back to your place. It would make me feel better.”

The hint of a plea in his voice and the look in Ray’s eyes kept you from protesting. “Fine, Ray can take me home. Just give me a second to change out of these pajamas,” you said, a bit surprised that Bucky wasn’t offering to take you home himself. “But you are going to tell me later what’s going on, right?” you asked.

“I will, but I need some answers myself first. Get changed. I’ll get your bag,” he said, gently guiding you to the bathroom so you could change and officially ending that conversation.

Ray was still by the entry door once you came out, looking a bit stiffer than usual, too. You stole a glance at Bucky as the three of you headed to the elevator, catching the anger etched in his features as he gripped your bag handle tight enough that you thought it would rip. They were leaving you in the dark about something. You weren’t sure if you could take any other bombshells.

“Ray may need to pick you up from work instead of me, but I’ll message you if that’s the case,” Bucky said, fixing his hair in the elevator reflection. “And… we may need to talk about your girls’ day out.”

“What about it?” you asked, already knowing where he was going with this.

“If you can cancel or reschedule it,” he replied.

You stared hard at him. Where was that coming from? “No, it's tomorrow, and I’m not cancelling or rescheduling. And don’t you dare use Zemo as an excuse to get your way,” you snapped. Even if it was a valid reason, you didn’t want to hear it.

His jaw clenched, but he looked sad as he glanced at you. “I just don’t know if it’s a good idea.”

“We talked about this. If it’s a safety issue, Ray agreed that someone could watch out for me. That should keep me safe,” you reminded him. You’d be fine. “Right, Ray?”

The blonde stared straight ahead. “That isn’t my decision,” he said apologetically.

Your shoulders slumped. For a short time, you thought he could be on your side or at least help give you some slack. “Right. Because you don't get to make decisions, and neither do I. You’re a bodyguard, I’m just a doll,” you said, looking straight ahead, too, and pulling your hand back when Bucky tried to take it. “Please, don’t.”

“Kotyonok…” Bucky sighed as the door opened. You marched out, not waiting for either of them. “Wait.”

You headed straight for the desk, feeling sadder when you didn’t see Natasha. “Checking out, please,” you said, sliding the room card over to the woman standing there.

“Of course. I hope you enjoyed your stay.” She looked behind you likely at Bucky before giving you a smile. “Ms. Romanoff also wanted to remind you that you have a place here if you need one.”

“I’m sure I’ll take her up on that soon,” you said, turning your head to glare at Bucky. While his expression was stoic, his eyes told you he didn’t want you to be upset with him. “And make sure she adds an inconvenience fee to the damaged wall bill. She’ll know what I mean.”

“I’ll be sure to do that,” she smiled. “Take care.”

Bucky was hot on your heel and you didn't make it two steps out the door before he had a hand on you. “You’re upset with me. Putting up more of that wall.”

You didn't speak until Ray walked past you to get his car. “You’re trying to get me to cancel my day out with my friends, after you went through the whole charade of buying me a new dress for it and everything. And after what you told me about your mom.” You took a breath to try to calm down. “Yeah, I’m upset, and yeah, you’re supplying me with the very bricks to build that wall.”

“I said we may need to talk about it, I didn’t flat out say you weren’t going,” he corrected you. He might as well have. “I know it means a lot to you, but-”

You held a hand up. “No. There are no ‘buts’ in this. For all you keep taking from me, I don’t ask for much. I really don't,” you stated. In fact, you’ve shown lots of restraint. “Who knows how many moments I’ll get like this with my friends once you move me in.” He wasn’t about to take this small thing from you after everything.

He titled his head. “You think I’ll keep you from them?”

“Part of me thinks you will, yes. Because as soon as I think that there’s hope, the second I think that we could be closer together while you loosen the reins, you say or do something that puts me back in your full control,” you said. He had to see that. “And every time you do that, like you are right now, it makes me want to push you away.”

“And you can push all you want, but I’ll just pull you closer,” he smiled, making you huff when he actually did so. “I’m not afraid to let you burn me.”

“You keep saying that. Give me a match or a lighter and we’ll test that theory,” you said. He burst out laughing, the sound loud in the morning air as your eyes widened. “Why are you laughing?” you asked incredulously. How could he laugh when you were still worked up?

“Because even arguing with you makes me happy,” he sincerely stated. “And now all I want to do is find a way to put a smile back on your face.”

You exhaled. He was so in love with the idea of a relationship with you that arguments appealed to him? Anyone else would've walked away by now.

“You’re infuriating,” you whispered when he touched the corner of your mouth and made it twitch in a small smile. “Impossible.”

“I know,” he whispered back, running a hand through his hair. “Listen, you’re tired and you’re overwhelmed, which is completely my fault. Am I right?”

“Yes,” you sighed. He hit it right on the nose.

“And maybe I was rash in suggesting that you cancel your plans, but I need to take care of a couple things before we discuss that more,” he said, leading you to Ray's car before you could protest. “You just have a good shift, okay?”

He was placating you now, and it was sadly working. “Fine,” you said, touching his hand, the metal one. “I don’t think I said so earlier, but thank you for finally telling me the truth,” you said, calmer than you were moments before. He should've told you from the start, but it couldn't have been easy reopening old wounds regarding his dad.

His gaze softened. “Thank you for letting me.”

“And whatever Ray told you or whatever’s going on, just breathe, okay?” you begged.

He took a deep breath. “I’ll just think of you and it’ll help,” he said, adding in a low voice as he pulled you against him. “And this.”

This was nothing like the slow, languid kisses from minutes ago. This was dominant, claiming, threatening to rob you of the air in your lungs, like he wanted you to feed your own breath into him. He either forgot Ray was there, or he simply didn’t care.

By the time Bucky stopped kissing you and helped you into the car, you didn’t want to look either of them in the eye.

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing your temple and shutting the door as your heart flip flopped. God, he was insufferable. Confusing. Obsessed.

“You're certainly keeping him on his toes,” Ray said, not driving off until he made sure Bucky was in his vehicle, too.

“Someone has to,” you said, staring out the window. “I’m going with my friends tomorrow. I don't care if he makes you drag me back,” you said. Unless your life was in some sort of immediate danger, there was no reason for you to skip out on meeting up with the girls.

“So you’re aware, the suggestion of you moving your day out has nothing to do with wanting to control you. He’s upset because of the news I delivered and he wants to keep you close,” Ray explained, making you feel a little bad.

“So, that news was the reason why you both changed your tune, and you can't tell me what that news is,” you guessed. If you were in some sort of danger though, surely Bucky would’ve said so. “He told me about his mom. How I saved her.”

Silence filled the vehicle. “So, you know the truth,” he said after a minute, his voice neutral. “Are you okay?”

“I’m trying to be,” you answered carefully. You really were.

“That’s all you can do,” he said before adding under his breath, “No good deed goes unpunished.”

You snorted. “I guess I'm living breathing proof of that.” It was ironic how an act of kindness put you on this path. “And as much as I don't like to wish pain upon people, I hope Bucky's dad got whatever he deserved.”

Winnie, from the short time you knew her, was nothing but wonderful. Bucky said the dahlia painting in his office served as a reminder that he would never do to you what his dad did to his mom. He would never set you up to take the fall for anyone else, wouldn’t let someone else hurt you if he could help it. He would forever stand by you.

Was pushing him away doing you any good?

“He did,” Ray promised you. “And I say with complete sincerity that I hope today is very uneventful for you after the time you've had.”

Your nose scrunched as you laughed. “So do I, Ray. So do I.”

Ray was kind enough to wait outside of your place as you showered and got ready for work, and didn't push you to talk more before he dropped you off at the shop. He was even kind enough to stop so you could get another cup of coffee. It helped improve your mood.

“There she is!” Kate smiled when you walked in. “Little miss not-so-single anymore.”

“Hey,” you giggled before you paused. “I didn't know you were working today. Did you switch shifts with someone?”

“God, the schedule’s all messed up. Mrs. Crandle called out for some business thing-”

“Business thing?” you asked, your brows pinched. She hardly ever took time off for things like vacation let alone a business thing without informing her staff.

“Yeah, I’m not really sure about all the details, but Lorraine ended up switching the whole schedule around. Mya’s coming in later, and I had to come in early, and your shift’s ending early.”

“What?” you frowned, checking the schedule to make sure. She was right. Your shift today was almost cut in half. “Would’ve been nice to get a text or something.”

The assistant manager wasn't bad to work with, but she could be a little forgetful with things like that. If Bucky hadn't just put money in your account, you may have been more upset over having half a shift cut. After the night and morning you had though, maybe an afternoon off wouldn't be so bad.

“She probably forgot since you were coming in at your normal time. Who knows?” Kate shrugged. “You know, I half expected Clark to be here waiting for you. Seemed really eager to see you yesterday.”

“Yeah, about that.” You looked toward the door, your body tense in anticipation even though he wasn't there. “Why did you tell him I was working today?”

“He’s kind of a regular, and I didn't really think about it. Then Mrs. Crandle brought up your boyfriend and…” Her face fell as she stopped cutting stems, which made you feel bad when she glanced your way. “Crap, I did something wrong, didn't I?”

You weren’t about to go into specifics regarding your personal situation. “I just don’t want customers to know when my shifts are unless I’m specifically working on an order or event for them, okay?” you said, hoping she understood that it was a general request.

Bucky was not getting in your head about your safety.

“Okay, as long as you aren’t mad,” she said. You gave her a smile to assure her that you were okay. “So, tell me about your new boyfriend.”

You filled her in as much as you could to make it sound believable, just like you had with Addison. Like her and Mrs. Crandle, Kate was excited for you. And they would never know the full truth.

As your shift went on, you were surprised you hadn't heard much from Bucky. It was for the best though. He was clearly dealing with something. As much as you didn't want to defend him in your mind, it had taken a lot for him to talk about his parents. To show you some of the damage done to his body. It was a vulnerable moment. Did you owe it to him to be vulnerable, too?

Wait, why did you owe him anything?

“Heading out?” Kate asked once your shift was up.

“Yeah,” you replied, glancing at your phone. You wondered if you should text Bucky before you decided against it. You'd let him know once you got to your place that you wouldn't need a ride. “Just call me if you need me to come back in.”

“Don’t worry about that. Enjoy the rest of your day!” she smiled.

Satisfied when you didn't see Bucky or Ray’s car waiting for you either, you decided to take a walk. It was a nice day, and you needed the fresh air. You hoped the weather was nice for the winery. You’d have to take photos to look back on what was going to be a fun time.

“Hey!” you heard someone shout after a few minutes of walking.

You stopped when you spotted Clark waving at you from the other side of the street. You barely waved back before he joined you. “Hey. What are you doing here?”

“Oh, I was just in the neighborhood,” he smiled, pushing his glasses up. “You done working already?”

“Yep,” you said, adjusting your bag. “And I should really-”

“Could we talk for a minute?” he asked.

You hesitated before nodding. “Sure,” you said, falling in step beside him.

“You know, I actually went to the shop to buy you flowers yesterday. I was going to buy you some roses,” he smiled.

Oh, God. “You were?”

“Yeah, but you weren’t there and… It doesn’t matter,” he smiled, shoving his hands in his pockets. “But I was thinking… Maybe we could grab a coffee sometime? My treat.”

The hopeful look in his eyes made a pit form in your stomach. “Clark, I’m seeing someone,” you said, his blue eyes dimming. Hadn’t Kate said that Mrs. Crandle brought up that you were in a relationship? “It’s fairly new, and I don’t want to mess things up,” you explained, though he wasn’t owed an explanation.

“I didn’t want to believe it,” he mumbled, kicking a small rock on the sidewalk. “Well, if it’s fairly new, I'm sure you can get coffee with other people.”

“Get coffee with people? Yes. But this kind of sounds like a date, and I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’m sorry,” you said. That would feel like cheating even if you didn't consider it a date, and you weren't that kind of person.

“Then we won’t call it a date,” he grinned.

Maybe you were feeling paranoid, but there was something weird behind his smile. “You just got out of a relationship, and I don’t want to send mixed signals by agreeing to go with you.”

His smile shook a bit. “It's just a coffee.”

“Is it?” The longer he stared, the more odd things felt, and you didn’t like it. “Listen, when you find someone else to give flowers to I’d be happy to pick some out for you.”

“I don't understand.” He laughed, but it sounded bitter. “You’ve always been nice to me.”

“Well, yeah. You’ve always been kind, too, when you come into the shop.”

“Too nice for someone like Bucky Barnes,” he muttered, his smile disappearing completely.

You gaped at him, almost faltering in your step. “What did you just say?”

“I said you’re too nice for someone like Bucky Barnes,” he said louder, his ire clear as day. “You think I don’t know about his reputation? He’s dangerous, and you’re too good for him.”

“How do you know I’m dating him?” you asked. And what did he know about his reputation?

He was quiet for a moment. “Mrs. Crandle said his name, and she has no idea what kind of man he is,” he said, making you feel uneasy. “I don’t think you do either.”

Oh, you knew plenty. “I appreciate your concern, really, but it’s nothing for you to worry about.”

“Well, I do. And I just don’t see why we can’t have one cup of coffee together,” he said, flashing a smile again. “It’ll be fun.”

“Because you know I’m seeing someone,” you said. He knew it before he bumped into you, but was still pushing for you to go with him. “And I also kind of make it a rule not to date customers,” you added, stopping when you got to your building. You walked faster than you thought.

“Well, rules should have exceptions, right? And if Bucky cared so much, where is he? Why wasn’t he waiting to pick you up and take you home?” he pressed, his eyes narrowing when you dug into your purse. “Maybe he doesn’t care about you as much as you think.”

Your next breath came out shaky. He hadn’t raised his voice at you, but you didn’t appreciate the third degree, or the implication that Bucky didn’t care. “Because he’s a busy man who sometimes works both days and nights. I don’t expect him to drop everything just to take me home.”

“If you took a chance on me, you’d never have to worry about things like that.”

You were starting to feel nauseous. “Well, sometimes I like the quiet after the bustle of the shop, so walking helps me decompress. And I can't take a chance on you when I’m seeing someone else.” Why was he being so pushy?

He took a small step closer. “You know, it’s dangerous to walk home alone.”

You took a step back, your keys between your fingers. “You’re right about that,” you agreed. The only reason you did so today was to take back a little control, which didn’t seem so smart now.

“I can start walking you home if you want,” he smiled, towering over you. Was he always so imposing? “When’s your next shift?”

You managed a smile in return, but it was extremely forced. “Clark, that’s really not necessary, but thank you for the offer. Enjoy the rest of your day.”

He gently took your arm when you turned toward the door, worry crawling up your spine when his hand tightened a fraction. You suddenly wish you had Bucky or Ray around. “I really don’t mind.”

“My boyfriend will mind, and I’m sure you can understand that. So it’s a no on the coffee and the walks home,” you said gently but firmly, pulling your arm back and rubbing the spot where Clark grabbed you. He wasn’t listening. It somehow felt worse than Bucky and you couldn’t pinpoint why. Was it because Clark tried to act nice? “It’s been a long few days, and I’m going to get some rest. Have a nice day, okay?”

His eyes narrowed again, but it was his chilling smile that unnerved you. “I’m sure I'll see you again soon. We’ll have to get that coffee,” he said, walking off before you could say another word.

You rushed into the building once he was out of sight, your hands shaking. It may have been from the confrontation or the combination of everything. Maybe Clark was just lonely and latched on a bit because you were nice. Hadn't Bucky done something similar?

But if Clark wanted to see you, why hadn't he just gone into the shop if he knew you were working?

Double checking your locks once you were in your apartment, you took a breath and stared at your phone once you sat down. You had to talk to Bucky. He answered within a few seconds of you calling.

“Kotyonok, is everything okay?” he asked, sounding both happy and concerned to hear from you.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?” you asked, hearing a few other men speaking in the background.

“Because you’re calling me and not texting. And you sound a little off. What’s wrong?”

“Everything’s fine,” you lied. How did he recognize that you felt off? “I just wanted you to know that the assistant manager changed my shift, so I went home early.”

“Wait, you’re already home?” he asked. The background noise suddenly stopped. “Did you get a cab? Please tell me you didn’t walk back to your place.”

“…Fine, I won’t tell you that.”

Bucky let out an impressive string of curse words as you pulled the phone away from your ear. “That’s not safe. You know it isn’t,” he hissed, but you knew he wasn’t actually angry with you. Just the situation. And bumping into Clark today and Zemo the day before, he had a bit of a point. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you? Because I said it may not be a good idea to go out with your friends.”

You closed your eyes. He was not going to make you feel bad. “I just needed a breather, okay? And I made it home just fine.”

“But did you? How do I know someone didn’t follow you?” he asked. Clark’s face flashed in your mind when you stayed quiet. “…Kotyonok, did someone follow you?”

“No one followed me that I know of,” you said. You really didn't have any idea. “But… I did bump into Clark. He was in the neighborhood.”

“Clark? That guy from the shop who tried to give you flowers just happened to be in your neighborhood when I wasn't around?” he asked, fury seeping into his tone as you winced.

“I… I’m sure it was a coincidence,” you said. Placating him in this wasn’t going to work, but you had to try.

“That isn’t a fucking coincidence and we both know it. Did he say anything? Try anything?”

You shut your eyes. It would be like ripping off a band-aid. “He asked me to go get a cup of coffee with him, but I told him I was seeing someone.”

He chuckled humorlessly. “He asked you out?” he asked, making you shift in your seat. “Why the fuck do I not have a file on him yet?!” he snapped at someone in the background.

“I’m working on it, boss!” you heard someone promise. “Should I call-”

“No. I’ll call him myself,” Bucky growled.

Who was he talking about? “Bucky, it’s okay. The guy asked me out and I said no,” you assured him. You weren't going to go out with Clark. “I’m sure women throw themselves at you every day and you turn them down.”

“They don't ‘bump’ into me in my neighborhood. And had you told me you were leaving early, I could’ve made sure this guy didn’t go anywhere near you. I don’t even want him near your shop until I know more about him,” he said, his anger not lessening. “If he tries anything, I will tear him apart piece by fucking piece,” he promised you, the intensity in his tone making your throat go dry.

“That isn’t necessary,” you whispered.

He sighed. “Why would you deliberately put yourself in a spot like this just to prove a point? Be pissed at me, I can take that, but do not risk your safety,” he said, adding in a quieter voice, “I couldn’t take it if something happened to you.”

You bit the inside of your cheek, hating how guilty you felt, how worried he sounded on your behalf. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to worry you,” you said. It was stubborn and dumb on your part, and now you were afraid that Bucky really would try to cancel your day out tomorrow. You couldn’t let him. “I’ll make it up to you, okay?”

“Make it up to me?” he asked. That seemed to get his attention. “How are you going to do that?”

“I’ll…” you began, steadying yourself. Natasha said you had power, and maybe you’d have to test that sooner than you expected. “Stay at your place tonight.”

You could hear a pin drop from the quiet. “You’ll stay the night?” he asked, his voice moving like lava through your veins.

“Yes,” you whispered, hammering the nail in the coffin.

“Give me two hours and I'll come get you,” he said, his voice strained, eager. “Be ready.”

“I will be.”

God, you hoped you knew what you were doing.

Oh, Clark. He's a problem now, isn't he? What do we think Ray told Bucky? And what's going to happen when you spend the night? Love and thanks for reading! ❤️

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[sencrose]

— 1004

pairing: yukimiya kenyu x f!reader

tags: established relationship, pwp, dry humping, cunnilingus, pet name (pretty girl), honestly the most vanilla thing i’ll ever write probably tbh

wc: 2.4k

summary: your boyfriend is adamant on showing just how much he loves you.

a/n: yeehaw first time writing for blue lock! vanilla and like... romance is not my usual thing so hope it's ok lol. dividers by @/adornedwithlight

ao3 link here

Everything’s great with your boyfriend.

For the most part.

He’s perfect on paper: kind, treats you well, adored by friends and family members alike. Never fails to bring a smile to your face whenever you see him. But that’s what makes it all the more frustrating when his hands grab your thighs with an ironclad grip, begging you to stop straddling him.

It’s not the first time this has happened, far from it. Maybe you were a bit foolish in knowingly dating someone so chaste, thinking you’d be able to convince him otherwise. But every time he rejects your advances, you can’t help but wonder why he’s still with you. Still, you heed his request, getting off him to take a seat next to him on the couch.

“Yukki…” you trail off, huddling into yourself as you find the words to say next, “do you like me?”

Kenyu’s eyes widen, his expression full of concern, as if you kicked a puppy right in front of him. “Huh? Where’s that coming from?”

“I mean…” you mumble, resting your face on top of your knees, “we never do anything more than kissing.”

Once you start, it’s hard to stop. The ball in your throat grows, the words spilling from your mouth, like water from a dam that’s been compromised.

“I know you want to wait ‘til marriage but, sometimes it feels like you don’t like me when that’s all we do,” you pause, looking over at him when a twang of guilt strikes your chest before looking down again, “I-I mean we don’t have to go all the way or anything like that.”

“I-It’s nothing like that,” he sighs, pinching his temple before continuing, “I like you, a lot. You could even say that I love you.” The confession makes your skin run hot, even though you’ve heard it plenty of times before.

“It’s not that I don’t want to do it, I’m just scared.” Kenyu shifts again, attempting to face you before continuing, but the second his eyes meet yours, he looks away. “When you get on top of me like that…” Now it’s his turn to be flustered, his skin blooming a pretty shade of pink as he struggles to thread his words together. “I don’t think I can last long.”

You sit up properly, tilting your head quizzically. He has your full attention now. “Huh?”

“It feels crazy good,” Kenyu continues, struggling to meet your gaze, “good enough to make me… You know.” He stops himself short of the word, but you both know what he means. He won’t say it out loud because he won’t know what to do with himself. Though if you’re being honest, you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself either.

The silence is deafening. It’s as if the room is waiting for a response. The realization strikes you like lightning, sudden and bright. It’s not that your boyfriend doesn’t like you, quite the opposite in fact. He might like you a little too much.

“Ah, but that’s kinda embarrassing, isn’t it?” he asks sheepishly, breaking the silence first and brandishing a forced smile to hide his insecurity.

“Yukki,” you say before putting your hands on either side of his face before pressing, “look at me.”

“I’m looking,” he mumbles through his squished lips.

“I don’t mind. Actually…” you look off to the side even though you’re the one who forced this intimate display of eye contact, “I think it’s really hot.”

His eyebrows manage to shoot up in shock, even in this position. “You sure?”

“You think I’d lie to you?”

He chuckles, and you can hear the relief in his voice. “No, you wouldn’t.”

“Then will you let me do the honors?” you ask, looking up at him doe-eyed and fluttering your lashes.

“S-Sure. But can we take it slow?”

“Whatever you want, Yukki,” you say softly, voice honeyed with affection as you get on top of him again. Kenyu shifts, his hands wrapping around your thighs softer this time.

It’s as if something’s shifted. You’ve kissed each other plenty of times before, but now that the intention to go further lies in the air, it’s like your first time again. Awkward, flustered, apologetic as you try to kiss him and accidentally bump foreheads together.

Kenyu laughs, because no matter what you do, he always finds you adorable. He decides to take his hands off your thighs and place them on the back of your head, gently bringing you in for a kiss that puts romance movies to shame. He’s in no rush, savoring the taste of you on his lips as he always does.

Kenyu always knows how to bring you back to Earth. He cherishes you–holds and kisses you like you’re the most delicate piece of china in a glass cabinet. And while this is nice enough on its own, you have other things you’ve been wanting to try. You keep his preferences in mind, taking it slow with a lazy roll of your hips. Even with that, you can hear his voice catching in his throat.

You use the opportunity to take it a bit further and slip your tongue in, which he welcomes. Every time you take it a bit further–whether it’s biting his lip or playing with his tongue–his self control chips a little more, whispered moans filling your mouth.

With every kiss, every roll of your hips, you can feel his length growing, getting hotter even when it’s confined by the fabric of his pants. It makes you want to work just a little harder, get yourself a little closer to cumming with him. The fabric is frustrating, an annoying reminder of just how close yet far you are from him. Though, that frustration starts to melt when Kenyu follows the rhythm of your hips.

It’s getting harder to keep your promise when he’s this cute. When you wrap your arms around his neck, you can feel just how hot and bothered he is, as if his soft whimpers weren’t enough of a testament already. What was once a soft grasp behind your head grows into something more primal and unrefined, desperation running through his fingertips as he grabs whatever he can to bring you closer to him.

You’re not any better, the speed of your hips picking up, desperate to hear him so needy. It’s the first time you’ve heard him like this.

As you lose your control and composure, your hips grind against him harder. Kenyu can’t keep his voice back any longer, desperate groans leaving his mouth with a quiver of his lips. Every sound he gives you goes straight to your pussy, making you warm and greedy for more.

You can feel the wet spot on your panties grow as you rub against him and wonder if he can feel it too. It might be pushing it, but the thought of freeing his cock shoots through your head. It feels and looks so tight against the fabric, it wouldn’t hurt to ask, right?

“Yukki,” you pause and give a glance at his zipper, “can I?”

“I thought we weren’t going all the way,” he replies, breathless as he looks up at you.

“We aren’t… I just wanna feel you more,” you say meekly, “that’s ok, right?”

His eyes widen like saucers before nodding. “Y-Yeah, go for it.”

So you do, unzipping his pants like you’re unwrapping a present—it might as well be one. You adjust and place yourself right on top and start again, though the sensation is much better this time around for both of you. You see it in the way Yuuki immediately throws his head back and moans, feel it in the way your cunt slides against his heat with only two layers of thin fabric keeping you apart.

All of it’s just too much for you–the pre that’s smeared on his boxers, the warmth of his cock against your clothed folds. It’s the closest you’ve been to him, to going all the way. Everything about it makes you more desperate to see him cum, so you focus all your attention on his leaky tip, just to see how sticky you can make it.

The sight of you proves to be too much for Kenyu, as he brings up his arm to shield his eyes. You’re quick to move it out of the way, a silent plea for him to look at you, look at where you’re nearly connected.

“Getting close?” you ask, sweet as sugar. Just the sound of your voice is enough to send him over the edge, but he wants to hold out, even if it’s just for a moment longer.

“You gotta look at me when you cum,” you plead.

Kenyu bites his lip and groans before shakily nodding.

You wrap your arms around his neck, bring your face closer to his until you’re touching forehead to forehead��close enough to feel every pant, every tremor of his voice.

“You love me?” you moan, digging your hips into him deeper.

“God, I love you so much,” he moans back, eyes lined with tears that are one blink from falling.

Kenyu’s desperately rutting his hips into you, and you swear you can feel him prodding at your entrance.

You feel it when Kenyu cums with a gravelly groan, his chest rattling as he cries. Even more so when you keep humping him, as his boxers get stickier and mix with your slick.

“W-Wait, too much,” he gasps, muscles visibly tightening in his neck as he throws his head back.

You can’t take your eyes off of the point where your undergarments meet, fabric soaked and darkened from the fluids.

“You really love me, huh?” you ask with a smile.

“Of course,” he sighs contentedly before giving you a soft peck on the cheek. It makes it all too easy to snuggle into him and lie your head on his chest. Before you can get too comfortable, Kenyu shifts his body and you’re suddenly far too aware of the sticky patch touching your underwear.

“Um… Should we clean up?” you ask, preparing yourself to dismount before Kenyu shifts his weight to push you back down on the couch, his hands around your wrists. Determination lights a fire in his eyes.

“You gotta let me return the favor.”

“H-Huh?”

“Let you…” he glances down at the wet spot of your panties before looking back at you, “you know?”

Oh.

“N-No, this is enough for me Yukki, I don’t wanna do anything you don’t wanna do.”

“But I do want this,” he assures you before kissing your cheek, his hands carefully tracing the curve of your hips, “I want to make you feel good. Will you let me?”

“I mean,” you pause, shuffling a bit and adjusting your gaze away from him, “if you’re okay with it.”

That’s all the approval he needs to kiss you, drawing a trail down your body.

Kenyu’s careful and meticulous, savoring every press of his lips against your skin. Whether it’s your neck, chest, waist, he lingers as if he doesn’t want to leave it behind. Every opened mouth kiss, flick of his tongue filled with adoration.

Whatever ritual he has going on, it doesn’t fail to make you shiver in anticipation, have butterflies blooming in your stomach. It makes you shy, being so exposed in front of him. In a way, it’s a little nostalgic—reminds you of the first time he dropped you off at your apartment and said his goodbyes with a kiss.

But then you’re brought back to the moment when Kenyu adjusts and shifts you to lie down on your back. His hands are there every step of the way, a silent plea to let him take care of everything.

He takes his time with you, slowly kissing a path up your leg. With each kiss, he lingers a moment longer. A playful bite here, a hint of tongue there. It keeps you on edge, just a little. Every hushed gasp or squeal earns a huff and a smile out of him.

“My pretty girl,” he sighs, adoration laced in his breath.

Carefully, he tests the waters with a delicate kiss before going in with a drag of his tongue as soon as a moan slips from your lips. From there, he uses his tongue with a determination you usually only see on the field from afar, like he’s trying to tear a hole in your underwear. The cotton gets wetter with every stroke of his tongue, sticky fabric clinging to your lips.

With his enthusiasm, it’s as if the underwear isn’t even there. All you can feel is Kenyu’s tongue, hot and heavy, incessantly drawing circles around your clit. It’s too much, looking down and seeing his head disappear under the fabric of your skirt. When you instinctively shut your legs out of embarrassment, his hands hook around your thighs and bring you closer. It brings a newly lit passion out of him, has him pressing his face even harder into your pussy.

The noises he makes while sucking on the fabric is too much for your ears, too much for a first time. It’s messy, unrefined, and nothing you would expect from your prim and proper boyfriend. Something about seeing him like this, so desperate and eager to serve, only adds to your arousal.

Despite how laser focused he is on your clit, on making you reach the apex of pleasure, he brings his hand to yours, your fingers intertwining. His thumb rubs circles into your skin, something he always does to comfort you. Maybe he feels it coming before you, with the way your breathing intensifies, the way your moans get louder and all the more cuter.

“You love me too, don’t you?” he asks, hushed and panting.

“L-Love you so, mmh, much Kenyu,” you cry back, biting your lip.

“Wanna show me how much?” he asks before going back into you, passion woven in each stroke of his tongue.

“Yes, yes, yes-” you cry before your climax finally hits you like a wave. Even though you barely recognize the sounds pouring from your lips, you wonder if Yuuki does. All stuttered moans and hushed pants as he guides you through it. His pace starts to slow as you come down from your high, before sealing it with a kiss on your clit.

“Next time you think I don’t love you,” he pauses to meet you face to face before pressing his lips onto yours, “I hope you’ll remember this.”

[notyourjaem]

2:46 AM ★ P. JISUNG

★ PAIRING: boyfriend!jisung x female!reader

★ GENRE: est. relationship, period sex, NSFW

★ SUMMARY: you can’t sleep because of your period cramps, good thing your boyfriend knows of a way to help you feel better.

★ WORD COUNT: 1.2k

★ CONTENT/WARNINGS: period! sex! do not read if you don’t like that!, multiple orgasms, fingering, red hair jisung (grants a warning), jisung is a very sweet boy, nipple sucking, soft sex/somewhat rough sex, creampie. oh and this isn’t really proofread 💀 sorry

★ AUTHORS NOTE: uhhhh I was on my period when I started this and one thing let to another and..yeah. first time writing period sex so lemme know how I did 😎 I will tag my girl @be-my-sunrise because she is my #1 jisung whore. this is for uuuu!! 💞 and happy birthday jisung even though im a day late (never a dollar short)

You stared at the red numbers glowing on the alarm clock the bedside table before rubbing your eyes; almost like the numbers would change when you looked again.

nope, still the same.

Shifting around underneath the comforter, you turned over to see your boyfriend in a deep sleep. You huffed, clearly feeling some kind of envy of Jisung actually feeling comfortable enough to fall asleep.

You turned back over, trying to fix the blankets before Jisung’s voice stopped you.

“What are you doing?” Judging by his tone and volume of his voice, you could tell that you had just woke him up.

You turned to him. “Sorry, did I wake you up?”

“Yes.” Jisung answered before pulling you closer to him, and pressing a soft kiss to your temple. “Why are you awake?”

“Because, I can’t sleep.” Your voice was slightly whiny in comparison to Jisungs quiet tone.

“What’s wrong? You didn’t sleep at all?” Now there was concern in his voice as he was now fully awake.

“No, I can’t get comfortable.” You tried your best to snuggle against his chest, but couldn’t shake the dull ache in your abdomen. “I’m like in pain.”

“Do you want some medicine? I’ll go get it.” Jisung’s fingers traced along your back as you closed your eyes.

“No, don’t get up. You’re so warm.” You put a hand against his chest as if to hold him still when Jisung never moved.

The two of you laid like that for what felt like a long time; Jisung shifting under the blankets to check what time it was. You were still awake.

“You’re still awake.” Jisung spoke, but you were unsure if it was a question or a statement.

“I’m still uncomfortable.” You winced; no amount of Jisung’s warm embrace could distract you.

“I know something that might help.” Jisung’s fingers traced patterns over your back as he spoke.

You knew exactly what he was talking about. “Ji, that’s going to be so messy.” You could only imagine what a mess all of the bodily fluids would be; nevermind the cleanup.

“Sweetheart, sheets go in the washing machine. I’ll remake the bed while you take a shower. Easy.” Jisung pressed a kiss behind your ear, sending electricity right through you. Damn you, hormones.

“You can make me feel better?” You pouted.

“mhm.” He hummed in response. “Lie on your back for me.”

Jisung gave you space to adjust yourself; hovering over you as you lied on your back. He adjusted the pillows behind your head to make sure you were comfortable.

You lifted your hips slightly as Jisung pulled your underwear off of you, putting them in a safe spot to the side of the bed.

“Tell me if you feel uncomfortable; I’ll stop.” Jisung spoke softly to you as he pushed your knees upwards to your chest.

You nodded. “Mhm.” As you braced for Jisungs touch.

Finally, his fingertips were pressing against your clit; moving in slow circles. You could tell he was testing the waters and seeing how you felt.

“Shit. That feels good.” You muttered; any tension you had melting away. “Come closer, I want you closer to me.”

Jisung smirked, doing as you wanted. He changed his position so he was directly over you. “Better?” He asked as a strand of red hair fell in his face.

“Yeah. Better.” You brushed his hair away from his face before kissing him.

Catching you completely off guard, Jisung effortlessly slipped his middle and ring finger inside of your cunt.

Your jaw fell slack as you moaned into his mouth “Oh my fuck, Jisung.”

“Yeah, tell me.” He muttered close to your ear as he was thrusting his fingers into you like his life depended on it. “Tell me how good that feels.”

You let out a choked moan, one of your hands reaching to grab onto your pillow. “So good, Ji. Shit.”

“Good girl, doing so good.” Jisung praised you before slipping another finger into you, making your face contort at the added pressure between your legs.

“Fuck.” You sighed, feeling an orgasm creeping up on you.

“I can tell you’re close.” Jisung spoke mostly to himself as you caught him watching his fingers move in and out of you. “Make a mess out of me; go ahead.”

His words made your stomach tighten, and Jisung let out a moan when he could hear the wet noises coming from your cunt; doing exactly as you were told.

Jisung pushed your shirt up with his free hand, pressing it flat against your stomach.

“Jisung, don’t stop. Please don’t fucking stop.” You pleaded as you put your hand over his.

“Fuck.” Jisung muttered under his breath, relishing in the way that you were begging him to ruin you.

You grabbed onto his wrist, whimpering when he started finger fucking you with vigor this time; your legs practically trembling and threatening to close.

Jisung pulled himself away from you, coming close to you once more to kiss you. “I’m gonna fuck you so good.”

In a fleeting moment, Jisung left you as he stood to remove his clothing. He came back to you, pulling you further down the bed by your hips.

“You’re so pretty.” Jisung spoke as he admired your fucked out expression. “Look at Me.”

He kissed you as soon as you turned to look at him. “How do you feel?” Jisung asked you innocently before you felt his thumb tracing over your right nipple.

You whimpered from the sensitivity of your body already; not giving him a full answer.

“Good?” Jisung dropped his head down, and as you moved underneath him, he caught your nipple in his mouth.

You let out a rather loud whine at the feeling; grabbing a hold of his hair once again as he grunted, sucking and nibbling at the swollen bud.

“Jisung, please!” You pathetically begged him, earning exactly what you wanted.

Jisung finally aligned his cockhead with your core, swiping it along your folds; definitely making a mess now.

Finally he pushed himself inside of you, letting out a sigh of pleasure when he did so.

“Oh my god, you feel so good.” Jisung wasn’t even inside of you all of the way.

You weren’t sure if it was because of your period, or the fact that Jisung already pulled two orgasms out of you, but you were definitely not going to last long.

You gave him so response except a meek whine before he was fucking into you; slow and deep.

“Ji-fuck!” You grabbed onto his bicep with one of your hands before he laced his fingers with yours; tightly holding your hand. “You can’t do that to me.”

“I think I can.” Jisung answered, kissing your jaw a few times before changing his pace.

Eventually he was slamming into you; getting carried away by your moaning and whining.

“Gonna cum in you; make a mess out of you.” Jisung grunted in your ear, making you yelp. “You like that?”

“Please, please.” You couldn’t answer fast enough before you felt him release inside of you; whimpering at how messy you felt.

“Fuck.” Jisung swore, steadying his breathing as he came down from his own high.

He kissed you on the forehead. “Feel better?”

You nodded, eyes feeling heavy. “A lot better…but tired.”

You must have started to doze off, before Jisung stopped you. “No, no, no. Let me clean you up. Don’t fall asleep like this.”

The switch up of him made you chuckle. “Okay, I’ll try not to.”

“Really, let me start a bath, I’ll change the sheets, and then we can get some sleep.”

Sounds like a plan.

[moonlightdreamzz]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY — YANG JUNGWON. ♡

goodnight and go

SUMMARY. It's your man's birthday, and you've pulled out all the stops to make sure it's the best one yet.

GENRE. Superrrrrr fluffy + Smut

THEMES. A continuation of Goodnight n Go. Established!Relationship, Idol!Jungwon x Reader, A day full of surprises!! Jungwon has had a very rough and tiring year. Be prepared to feel the feels.

WARNINGS. Mentions of alcohol, everyone gets drunk eventually, drunk birthday $ e x.

FEAT. All members of Enha + TXT members.

AUTHORS NOTE. Happy early birthday to my baby, Yang Jungwon. I forever love you. You deserve the world <333

“Roses are red, violets are blue…” you sing out loud, your eyes focused intently on the crisp white sheet of paper in front of you. Your pen taps rhythmically against the edge of the desk as you will something—anything—poetic to flow from your lips.

Your voice, unfortunately, isn’t half as good as Jay’s. He proves this by letting out a long, dramatic sigh from where he’s sitting across from you, glaring at you with pure disappointment.

“…Your rhymes are bad, and I don’t know what to do,” Jay cuts in, his eyebrows furrowing as he crosses his arms over his chest.

You pause mid-tap and look up at him, feigning offense. “Excuse me, Mr. Park Shakespeare. Where’s your masterpiece, huh?”

Jay smirks, holding up his phone like it’s a trophy. “Already sent. A voice memo. I serenaded him like the angel I am.”

You groan, throwing your head back in defeat before glaring at the nearly blank card on your desk. “Not all of us are blessed with vocal cords made of gold, Jay. Some of us have to work with this.” You wave the pen in his direction.

“Then work faster,” Jay shoots back, leaning back in his chair. “His first party starts in three hours, and that sad excuse for a card won’t write itself.”

“You’re talking about me, but don’t you have a cake to go pickup right about…” you look at the non existent watch on your left arm for dramatic effect before continuing, “now?”

His hands quickly reach behind him to grab the pillow that he was leaning on—your favorite pillow may you add, chucking it at you playfully before standing up. He brushes the invisible dirt off his pants on his journey to slide his shoes on that rested in front of your door.

“You know, I come here to not feel like I’m with Jungwon, but then you act just like him.”

“Well they don’t call us bestfriends to lovers for no reason, now do they?” You snicker, stealthily grabbing your pillow that he threw and returning the favor. It bounces off his back

Jay turns around, catching the pillow mid-bounce before glaring at you. “You’re lucky it’s his birthday tomorrow, or I’d—”

“You’d what? Throw another pillow? Oh no, Jay, not the cushions!” you tease, laughing as he shakes his head in mock annoyance.

He slips his shoes on and pulls out his phone, muttering something about being surrounded by children before glancing back at you. “Alright, I’m off. Try not to stress too much, okay? The card looks fine. And don’t let Jungwon’s puppy eyes make you spiral into thinking you need to write him an epic poem or something.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you wave him off with a grin. “Don’t forget the cake! And text me when you get there!”

Jay points at you as he opens the door. “Text me if you need anything.”

“Will do,” you salute as the door closes behind him.

The apartment falls quiet again, and you glance at the clock. Just a little over two hours until the clock strikes midnight and you get to surprise Jungwon with the start of what would hopefully be his best birthday yet.

You pick up the card again, running your fingers over the envelope. The words you’d written earlier suddenly feel inadequate. Jay was right—Jungwon would be happy with just spending time together. But he meant too much to you to settle for “just.”

You tuck the card back into your bag, grab the gift, and head into your bedroom to check on the other surprises you had planned for tomorrow. As you smooth out the edges of the decorations and double-check the little details, a text pops up on your phone.

Jay: Cake secured. Looks too good to be real. Don’t screw this up, Shakespeare.

You snort, typing back a quick response.

You: Just focus on getting it here in one piece. I’ve got everything else under control.

As you smooth out the wrapping paper on the little box, your thoughts drift to the last few months—how everything shifted the night you and Jungwon built gingerbread houses together. It was supposed to be a simple holiday tradition, but somehow, by the end of the night, there’d been flour in his hair, icing on your cheeks, and a kiss so soft it felt like a dream.

Now, months later, the tension that used to linger between you both had melted away. There were no more stolen glances, no more unspoken confessions. Just him, loving you in ways you never even thought to ask for, and you, loving him back with everything you had.

You glance at the clock again. 9:57 PM. Two hours until midnight, and for the first time, you get to be the one to make Jungwon feel special on his birthday.

Jay’s words echo in your head. You’ve got him wrapped around your finger. But what Jay didn’t know—what no one really understood—was just how much Jungwon had you wrapped around his.

The way he always manages to make you feel safe, no matter what chaos life throws your way. His love shines so clearly in how attentive he is, always noticing when you’re stressed or tired, even before you do. The quiet way he folds your blanket when you leave it on the couch. The way he checks in on you, not with grand gestures but with little questions like, Did you eat? Are you warm enough?

And then there’s his unique way of thinking that keeps you on your toes. The way his eyes light up when he gets passionate about something, how he always challenges you to see the world in new ways. He’s thoughtful and curious, always asking questions that make you stop and think.

But it’s his passion that really leaves you breathless—the fire he hides beneath that calm exterior. He loves with an intensity that catches you off guard sometimes. Like how he randomly grabs your hand in public, tugging you closer with that confident grin, or the way his kisses always seem just a little more passionate than the last.

And the way he looks at you… it’s like you’re the only person in the world.

Jay would say you’re being dramatic. Maybe you are. But it’s hard not to be when it comes to Jungwon.

The sound of your phone buzzing pulls you from your thoughts. You grab it and see his name on the screen.

Jungwon: Are you still with Jay?

You smile, typing back quickly.

You: Nope, he left. It’s just me now.

Jungwon: Good. I don’t like sharing you with him for too long.

You laugh, warmth blooming in your chest. It’s such a Jungwon thing to say—playful but with just enough honesty that you can feel the weight behind it.

You: Possessive much?

Jungwon: Only with you.

Biting your lip, you set the phone down, unable to stop smiling. You’re about to spend his birthday with him in a way you never imagined just a year ago. Back then, he was your best friend, and now… now, he’s the person you can’t picture life without.

As you gather the last few decorations, you make a mental note to thank past you for saying yes to that first kiss.

Midnight couldn’t come fast enough.

You park outside the HYBE building, your fingers gripping the steering wheel as you try to calm the nervous energy bubbling inside you. The whole ride over, you couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot, but how could you not? You’re the worst at keeping surprises, and Jungwon—being as perceptive as he is—has probably already picked up on the fact that you’re up to something.

You check your phone one last time, scanning through messages from his members and the other idols crammed into your apartment right now.

Jay: He better cry. I’m not doing this again.

Sunghoon: Make sure you stall him if we’re still lighting candles when you get here.

Taehyun: Don’t let him figure it out, or I’m telling everyone how bad you are at holding your liquor.

You roll your eyes with a laugh, texting back a quick thumbs-up before stepping out of the car. Jungwon’s already waiting for you by the doors, bundled in a long coat and scarf.

His face lights up the second he sees you, his smile soft and familiar as he jogs over to the car. “Hey,” he says, sliding into the passenger seat, his tone warm and teasing. “You’re early. That’s new.”

“Wow, hello to you too,” you say, pretending to be offended. But your grin gives you away.

Jungwon leans back in his seat, his sharp eyes narrowing slightly as he studies you. “What’s with the smile?”

“What smile?” you deflect, starting the car and pulling out onto the road.

“The one that says you’re hiding something,” he replies easily, cutting straight to the point.

Your heart skips, and you quickly look out the window to avoid his gaze. “I’m just happy to see you, birthday boy.”

“Uh-huh,” he hums, clearly unconvinced. But he doesn’t press further, instead resting his arm on the center console so his hand is close to yours.

The drive feels both too long and too short. Every passing minute makes your excitement grow, but you’re also painfully aware of how close you are to giving yourself away. When you finally pull into your apartment complex, you cut the engine and glance over at him.

“Okay, close your eyes,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady.

Jungwon raises a brow. “What?”

“Just do it!” you laugh, reaching over to cover his eyes with your hands.

He chuckles, the sound warm and familiar. “You’re so bad at this, you know that?”

“Shut up and trust me,” you say, stepping out of the car and walking around to his side.

He keeps his eyes closed like you asked, though you can tell he’s holding back a smile. You guide him up the stairs to your apartment, your hands lightly on his shoulders to steer him.

When you finally reach the door, you take a deep breath, barely able to contain your excitement. You push it open, leading him inside before dropping your hands.

“Okay,” you whisper. “Open your eyes.”

Jungwon blinks a few times, adjusting to the dim light. His jaw drops the second he takes in the room.

His members are the first thing he notices, all grinning at him like they’ve won the lottery. “Happy birthday!” they yell in unison, their voices echoing through the room.

But it doesn’t stop there. He sees Taehyun, Soobin, and a few other friends from other groups, all cheering and laughing as he stands frozen in the doorway. The walls are decorated with baby pictures and birthday banners, and the table is covered in gifts, letters, and a cake that’s lit with candles.

Jungwon turns to you, his expression a mix of shock and disbelief. “What is this?”

“It’s for you,” you say, biting your lip nervously. “Surprise.”

For a moment, he doesn’t say anything, his eyes darting from the decorations to the faces of everyone who showed up. Then his gaze lands on you, softening as he shakes his head with a laugh.

“You’re unbelievable,” he says, his voice filled with warmth.

“And you’re welcome,” Jay calls from across the room, already holding up a tray of shots. “Now, come on, birthday boy, we’ve got a lot of embarrassing toasts to make.”

“And don’t forget shot o clock!” Jake yells seemingly from the darkness.”

Jungwon glances around the room, his heart swelling as he takes in the scene again. His members are goofing off, Taehyun is teasing Sunghoon about something, and Jay is still holding court over the shots table like he owns it. But through all the noise and laughter, his gaze keeps drifting back to you.

You’re standing by the table, quietly fixing a balloon that got knocked out of place. You’re not even looking at him, but there’s something about the way you carry yourself—so sure, so thoughtful, so you—that has him rooted to the spot.

The past year flashes in his mind. It’s been the best year of his life, no question. He got you, the girl he’d quietly loved for so long, the one who knew him better than anyone else. And somehow, despite his flaws, you’d loved him back with an intensity he never thought he deserved.

But it hasn’t been easy.

Being leader means there’s never really an “off” switch. He’s constantly juggling responsibilities, navigating the needs of his members, the demands of the company, and the weight of expectations from the fans. It’s a role he takes seriously—it’s who he is—but it’s also exhausting.

The late nights spent writing and recording. The endless meetings and rehearsals. The pressure to be a pillar of strength when his members need him, even when he feels like he’s crumbling inside.

Some days, he barely has time to breathe.

And yet, through all the chaos, there’s you.

You, who seem to know exactly when he needs to hear your voice. You, who show up at just the right time, armed with his favorite snack or a silly joke to lighten his mood. You, who love him not because he’s Jungwon of ENHYPEN, but because he’s Jungwon, the boy who eats his cereal too slowly and hums when he’s concentrating.

Standing here now, with you and everyone he cares about in the same room, he feels seen in a way he hasn’t in a long time. Not as a leader. Not as an idol. But as a person.

And God, does it mean everything.

His chest tightens as the realization hits him: this—you—is his safe place. The one thing that’s kept him grounded through it all.

“Hey,” you call softly, pulling him from his thoughts. You’ve noticed him staring, and your brow furrows in that adorable way it does when you’re worried about him. “You okay?”

He nods, a smile tugging at his lips. “Yeah,” he says, his voice quiet but steady. “I’m more than okay.”

“Alright, everybody!” you call, clapping your hands together and stepping behind the makeshift bar you set up on your kitchen counter. “It’s officially shock o’clock! Who’s ready to turn Jungwon into a real 21-year-old tonight?”

A loud cheer erupts from the room, and Jungwon groans, his head falling into his hands as he sits on the couch. “Why do I feel like this is going to haunt me tomorrow?” he mutters, though there’s a small smile tugging at his lips.

“Because it will!” Sunghoon yells, already reaching for one of the brightly colored shot glasses you laid out.

You grin and pick up the bottle of Ciroc, the cool glass catching the light as you wave it in the air. “Y’all, I’ve been waiting all week to make this boy take his first real shot,” you say, pouring a generous amount into a shaker. “So, as your certified bartender for the night, let’s kick this off the right way!”

Jay leans against the counter, giving you a skeptical look. “You know you’re not certified, right?”

“Certified by vibes, Jay. Vibes,” you reply, adding a splash of fruit juice to the mix before giving the shaker an overly dramatic shake.

The room is alive with laughter and music as you pour the first round of shots, the bright liquid glinting in the light. One by one, everyone grabs a glass—Taehyun’s eyes light up as he claims the lime green one, while Sunoo and Jake argue over who gets the pink one.

Finally, you grab a shot glass for yourself and hold it up, nodding toward Jungwon. “Okay, birthday boy, this one’s for you. No backing out now.”

He stands reluctantly, his expression a mix of amusement and mild horror. “You really won’t let me sit this one out, huh?”

“Absolutely not,” you say, your grin mischievous. “You deserve to let loose for once. So, here’s the deal: tonight, you’re not leader Jungwon. You’re just Jungwon. And we’re going to celebrate like crazy because, for once, you’re not allowed to be responsible.”

The room cheers in agreement, and Jungwon lets out a laugh, shaking his head. “Fine. One shot.”

“One?” Sunghoon says, pretending to be offended. “Nah, it’s shock o’clock all night, my guy.”

Jungwon takes the glass from your hand, his fingers brushing yours. He looks at you, a quiet fondness in his eyes that makes your heart skip. “You really planned all this for me?”

You nod, your voice softening. “Of course I did. You deserve to have fun, Won. Just… let me take care of you tonight, okay?”

His lips curve into a small, genuine smile, and he raises the glass. “Alright. Let’s go.”

The room counts down—“Three, two, one!”—and everyone throws back their shots, the air immediately filling with the sound of gasps, laughter, and groans.

Jungwon coughs slightly, his eyes wide as he sets the glass down. “What was that?”

“Freedom,” you reply with a wink, already pouring the next round.

1:00AM

As the night goes on, you make it your mission to keep the energy alive. You mix drinks with questionable accuracy, cheer the loudest during impromptu dance battles, and even drag Jungwon into a game of flip cup that ends with him laughing so hard he can barely stand.

And for the first time in a long time, you see him completely let go.

His laughter fills the room, his shoulders relax, and there’s a lightness to him that makes your heart swell. He’s not worried about schedules or responsibilities. He’s just Jungwon, a 21-year-old boy surrounded by people who love him.

The room is a swirling mess of laughter and slurred words, the empty Ciroc bottle now serving as the centerpiece for an increasingly wild game of Truth or Dare. Jay and Jake are collapsed on the couch, practically crying with laughter over some inside joke, while Sunoo is doubled over after losing a dare that involved chugging a questionable mix of soda and melted ice cream.

You, still feeling a pleasant buzz but mostly sober, keep a watchful eye on Jungwon, who’s slouched on the floor with flushed cheeks and a lazy grin. He’s definitely the drunkest, though his giggles and the way he clings to your arm are undeniably cute.

“You okay, birthday boy?” you whisper, leaning down so only he can hear.

He nods, blinking up at you with half-lidded eyes. “I’m great,” he mumbles. Then, with a goofy smile, he adds, “You’re so pretty. Have I told you that yet?”

Your heart squeezes, but you shake your head with a laugh. “Not in the last five minutes.”

“Hey! No whispering!” Sunghoon shouts, pointing dramatically at the two of you. “It’s your turn, Jungwon!”

Jungwon sits up straighter, wobbling a little as he tries to focus. “Fine! Truth.”

“Oh, we’re not going easy on you,” Taehyun says, his sharp gaze playful as he leans forward. “Alright, truth: who’s your celebrity crush?”

The room bursts into a chorus of “Oooohs,” and Jungwon scrunches his nose, clearly trying to think through the haze of alcohol. “That’s easy,” he slurs, pointing at you without hesitation. “Y/N’s my crush. And my girlfriend. And she’s way better than any celebrity.”

Your face heats up as everyone howls with laughter and cheers.

“Dude, we meant besides her,” Jay says, shaking his head, though he’s clearly amused.

“Well, that’s my answer,” Jungwon says stubbornly, crossing his arms like a pouty kid.

Your heart swells, and you squeeze his hand gently. “You’re so cute,” you whisper, but he doesn’t hear you over Sunoo daring Taehyun to serenade Sunghoon.

The game continues, the dares growing more ridiculous and the truths more revealing. Jake gets dared to text his old high school crush, while Sunghoon reluctantly admits he once fell off stage during a rehearsal and blamed it on a tech issue.

When it’s Jungwon’s turn again, Taehyun smirks. “Alright, leader-nim. Truth or Dare?”

“Truth,” Jungwon says, his words slightly slurred but still clear enough to understand.

“Tell us the sweetest thing Y/N’s ever done for you,” Taehyun challenges, a knowing grin on his face.

Jungwon’s expression softens instantly, his gaze locking onto yours. For a moment, it’s like the rest of the room fades away.

“Everything she does is sweet,” he says quietly, his voice warm and sincere. “But… I think the sweetest thing is just how much she cares. Like tonight.” He gestures around the room, his eyes glossy but full of emotion. “She didn’t have to do all this, but she did. She always does. She makes me feel like… like I’m not just the leader. Like I’m not just some idol.”

The room falls silent, everyone staring at Jungwon in awe.

“She makes me feel loved,” he finishes, his words stumbling a little but hitting straight to your heart. “And I love her for that. I love her so much.”

Your breath catches, and tears prick the corners of your eyes. You lean down, cupping his face in your hands as you whisper, “I love you too, Jungwon.”

The spell is broken when Sunghoon shouts, “Oh my God, you two are disgusting!”

Jungwon sticks his tongue out at him, and you laugh, brushing his hair back from his face. “Alright, that’s enough truth or dare for him,” you say, helping him up. “I think the birthday boy needs some water.”

The room erupts in protests, but you ignore them, guiding Jungwon toward the kitchen. As he leans heavily against you, he mumbles, “I meant it, you know. I really love you.”

“I know, baby,” you say softly, pressing a kiss to his temple. “And I really love you too.”

Back in the living room, the chaos is still going strong. Jay is attempting to freestyle a birthday rap with Sunoo beatboxing (poorly), while Taehyun cheers them on from the couch. Jungwon, now armed with a glass of water you forced him to drink, flops back onto the floor beside you, watching the scene from the kitchenwith a lazy grin.

“Hey,” he slurs suddenly, turning to you with squinted eyes, “why aren’t you drunk?”

You blink, caught off guard by the question. “What do you mean? I am drunk!”

Jungwon snorts, leaning closer as if to inspect you. “You’re a liar,” he says, poking your cheek. “I’ve seen you drunk, and it’s not this. You get all giggly and… and you can’t even walk straight.”

“I can’t walk straight now!” you argue, laughing as you shove his shoulder.

He shakes his head dramatically, pointing a wobbly finger at you. “Nope. Not buying it. You got me drunk—got all of us drunk—but you’re over here being all… responsible and sober. Not fair.”

“I’m not being responsible!” you protest, standing up with an exaggerated stumble for effect. “See? Totally buzzed.”

Jungwon raises an unimpressed eyebrow, then grins mischievously. “Prove it.”

You cross your arms, narrowing your eyes. “Prove what?”

“Take a shot,” he challenges, reaching for the Ciroc bottle. “Take three, actually. Match me.”

“Oh, I’m matching you?” you ask, your voice laced with playful defiance. “Bet.”

The group catches wind of the exchange and immediately starts chanting, “SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!” like a rowdy audience at a college party.

“Don’t do it, Y/N!” Sunoo warns dramatically. “He’s trying to corrupt you!”

“I don’t need his help!” you shoot back, snatching the bottle from Jungwon’s hand. “Let’s go!”

You pour the first shot and down it without hesitation, the burn making your face scrunch up as everyone cheers. Jungwon watches you with wide, amused eyes, clearly impressed.

“Another,” he says, leaning closer, his grin turning sly. “C’mon, baby, keep up.”

“Don’t tempt me,” you warn, pouring a second shot and throwing it back just as quickly.

The crowd erupts again, but your focus stays locked on Jungwon, who’s leaning in even closer now. His warm, alcohol-flushed face is just inches from yours, and his hand brushes your thigh as he steadies himself.

“You’re really doing it,” he murmurs, his voice dropping an octave. “Didn’t think you had it in you.”

“Please,” you tease, pouring the third shot. “You don’t know who you’re messing with.”

But as you lift the glass to your lips, Jungwon’s hand catches yours, his eyes darkening ever so slightly. “Wait,” he says, his thumb brushing over your knuckles. “Lemme help you.”

Before you can ask what he means, he tips the glass toward your mouth himself, his gaze never leaving yours. You let him, the shot burning your throat as his free hand slides up your back to your neck, pulling you closer.

“You’re so pretty,” he murmurs, his lips brushing your ear.

Your breath hitches, the mix of alcohol and his touch sending a rush of heat through you. “You’re drunk,” you whisper back, though your voice wavers.

“Yeah,” he admits, his lips now grazing your jaw. “Drunk in love with you.”

The room around you fades into the background noise of laughter and cheers as Jungwon’s kisses trail down to your neck. His hands find your waist, pulling you onto his lap, and you feel his breath against your skin, warm and intoxicating.

“You’re matching me now,” he whispers, his voice low and teasing. “But I think you need one more shot.”

“I’ll take it,” you say, your own boldness surprising you. “If you take it with me.”

Jungwon grins, his lips brushing yours. “Deal.”

You pour two more shots, the tension between you thick enough to drown out everything else. As you clink glasses and down them together, his hands tighten around your waist, and you know this night is far from over.

2:25AM

The party was in full swing now, the bass from Young Nudy’s Peaches and Eggplants rattling the walls of your apartment. The music, the drinks, the flashing LED lights you set up earlier—all of it had turned your cozy little space into a full-blown club.

Your careful planning was paying off, too. A pile of pillows and blankets was stacked in the corner for when the inevitable “too drunk to drive” moment arrived, which you knew was only a matter of time. You’d even stocked up on water bottles and ibuprofen for the morning-after chaos.

But for now, the only thing on your mind was Jungwon.

“Y/N, let him breathe for a second!” Sunghoon hollered from across the room, a teasing grin plastered on his face.

“Like you’re not going to be wrapped up with someone in 10 minutes,” you fired back, throwing a playful glare in his direction.

Jungwon, who was securely stationed behind you, laughed against your shoulder, his hands gripping your hips to keep you steady as you swayed to the beat. The warmth of his touch burned through the fabric of your dress, and every time you shifted your weight, you felt him tighten his hold on you like he was trying to memorize the moment.

“You’re too good at this,” he mumbled into your ear, his voice low and slightly slurred.

“At what?” you asked, tossing a cheeky smile over your shoulder.

“Everything,” he replied without hesitation, his eyes gleaming under the party lights. “Planning this, dancing like this… driving me insane like this.”

“Good,” you teased, leaning back against his chest.

“Good?” he repeated, his lips brushing your ear. “You’re lucky there’s a room full of people here right now.”

Your stomach flipped at his words, but before you could respond, Sunoo appeared beside you, holding up a bottle of tequila like it was a trophy. “Dance floor shots! Let’s go!”

The crowd cheered, and you found a small plastic cup being shoved into your hand. Jungwon reluctantly released his grip on you as Sunoo poured, but his other hand stayed at your waist, possessively.

“Cheers to Jungwon!” Sunoo yelled, lifting his own cup in the air.

“To Jungwon!” everyone echoed, and you both tossed back your drinks.

As the burn hit your throat, you turned back to Jungwon, who was already watching you with that mischievous grin you loved so much. The alcohol had fully hit you now, making the edges of your vision blur and your inhibitions dissolve into the music.

“Let’s dance,” you said, grabbing his hand and pulling him back into the middle of the room.

This time, there was no hesitation. Jungwon’s hands found your waist again, guiding you as you moved in sync to the beat. You let yourself go completely, swaying and grinding against him as the music pulsed around you.

“You’re dangerous,” he muttered against your neck, his breath warm and heavy.

“You love it,” you shot back, your voice dripping with confidence.

“I do,” he admitted, his hands sliding down your sides. “But I don’t think I can wait much longer, baby.”

Your heart raced as his lips brushed against your ear again, his voice dropping even lower. “Tell me everyone’s got a place to sleep tonight, because I need you all to myself.”

You turned in his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck as your lips brushed his. “I planned for everything,” you whispered, your voice soft but sultry.

“Good,” he murmured, closing the gap between you.

The world around you faded as his lips captured yours, his hands pulling you flush against him. The cheers and hollers from your friends became distant background noise as you got lost in the moment.

But Jungwon didn’t stop there. He pulled back just enough to meet your eyes, his gaze dark and full of unspoken promises. “Let’s get to that bed, Y/N,” he whispered.

You didn’t need to be told twice. With a knowing smile, you grabbed his hand and started leading him toward the bedroom, the rest of the party disappearing behind you.

As soon as the door to your bedroom clicked shut behind you, Jungwon was on you, his lips crashing into yours with a hunger that made your knees weak. His hands framed your face before sliding down to your waist, pulling you close as he backed you up toward the bed.

“You don’t waste any time, do you?” you teased between kisses, your words a little breathless from the intensity.

“It’s my birthday,” he murmured against your lips, his voice low and gravelly. “I get to do whatever I want, right?”

You didn’t argue.

The backs of your knees hit the bed, and you let him guide you down onto the soft mattress. He followed without hesitation, hovering over you as his lips trailed from your mouth to your jawline, and then down to your neck. The weight of his body against yours was grounding, but the way his hands explored every inch of you sent your heart racing.

“Jungwon…” you whispered, your fingers threading through his hair as he pressed warm, open-mouthed kisses along your collarbone. “Wait,” you say, your voice breathy and slurred with the alcohol still coursing through your system. He groans, clearly not happy about the interruption. “I have to give you your first gift before you get your… last gift of the night.” You bite your lip, a teasing glint in your eye.

Jungwon chuckles softly, leaning his forehead against yours. “You’re killing me here, Y/N.”

You giggle, taking a step back and swaying slightly as you try to steady yourself. “Patience, birthday boy.”

Still buzzing with excitement, you clear your throat dramatically and start singing Happy Birthday—off-key, loud, and completely unhinged. Jungwon bursts out laughing, clutching his stomach as he doubles over. “Oh my God, you’re so drunk,” he teases between laughs, his eyes crinkling in the way that makes your heart flutter.

“Shut up! This is serious,” you reply, wagging a finger at him. You finish the song with a theatrical bow, nearly tripping in the process, and he catches you with ease.

“You’re ridiculous,” he mutters, but his smile is so soft, so full of love, that it makes your cheeks burn.

“Okay, okay, focus,” you say, stumbling over to your dresser. You pull out a small red Cartier box and turn to face him, holding it up like it’s the Holy Grail. His eyes widen immediately.

“Y/N… what did you do?”

You smile shyly, stepping closer and opening the box to reveal a sleek, gold Cartier bracelet. “Happy birthday, Jungwon. You deserve this—and so much more.”

His jaw drops as he stares at the bracelet, speechless. “This is… Y/N, this is too much.”

“Shh,” you cut him off, clasping the bracelet onto his wrist with unsteady hands. “You’re worth every penny.”

As soon as the bracelet is secure, you pull out your next gift: a silver chain with your name on it. “So you can take me everywhere,” you say with a giggle, draping it around his neck. His fingers brush over the pendant, and for a moment, you think he might cry.

“Y/N…”

“Wait, there’s one more,” you interrupt, suddenly serious. You grab a folded piece of paper from your nightstand—the letter you’d been agonizing over all day. “This one… this one’s really important.”

Jungwon looks at you with wide, curious eyes as he takes the paper from your hand. He sits down on the edge of the bed, carefully unfolding it. His expression softens as he begins to read, and you feel your heart racing in your chest.

Jungwon,

Where do I even start? There are a million things I could say about you, but I’ll try to keep this from turning into a novel.

This past year with you has been the best year of my life. I never thought I’d find someone who could see me the way you do—who could make me feel so safe, so wanted, so loved. But then you came along, and you’ve shown me over and over again what love really looks like.

You work so hard every day, and I see how much you carry on your shoulders. You give your heart to everyone—your members, your fans, your family—and you rarely stop to take care of yourself. But that’s where I come in, okay? I want to be the person who makes it easier for you to breathe. I want to be your home, your peace, your everything—because that’s what you are to me.

I know you don’t always feel like you deserve the good things in life, but you do, Jungwon. You deserve everything. And I’m going to spend the rest of my life proving that to you, if you’ll let me.

Thank you for being you. For loving me. For letting me love you.

Happy birthday, my love.

Forever yours,

Y/N

By the time he finishes, his hands are trembling slightly, and he looks up at you with glossy eyes.

“You really did all of this for me?” he asks, his voice thick with emotion.

“Of course I did,” you reply softly, sitting beside him. “You deserve to feel loved and celebrated, Jungwon. You’ve given so much of yourself to everyone else. This year… I wanted to give something back to you.”

He cups your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing gently over your cheeks. “I don’t even know what to say,” he whispers, his lips hovering just above yours.

“Don’t say anything,” you murmur, leaning in to kiss him deeply. “Just let me love you tonight.”

He pulled back just enough to look at you, his eyes glassy but filled with so much emotion that it almost overwhelmed you. “Y/N,” he said softly, his fingers brushing a strand of hair from your face. “I don’t even know how to say this right, but… thank you.”

“For what?” you asked, your voice barely audible over the sound of your heartbeat.

“For all of this,” he said, gesturing vaguely toward the party still raging on the other side of the door. “For tonight. For… for being you. You didn’t have to go this hard, but you did. You always do.”

You felt your cheeks flush under his gaze. “You deserve it,” you said simply, reaching up to cup his cheek.

His lips curved into a small smile as he leaned into your touch. “You make me feel like I deserve it,” he admitted, his voice cracking just slightly. “And that’s crazy to me. I never thought I’d get to feel this way about someone. I never thought someone would care about me like this.”

“Jungwon…”

“No, let me say this,” he interrupted gently, his thumb tracing small circles on your hip. “I suck at talking about my feelings, but I need you to know this. The past year has been insane—like, absolutely insane. I’ve been exhausted, overwhelmed, questioning if I can even keep up sometimes… but you? You make it all worth it. Every single hard day, every single doubt—it doesn’t matter because I have you.”

Tears stung the corners of your eyes as you listened to him pour his heart out. “Won…”

“And tonight?” he continued, his voice thick with emotion. “It’s only been my birthday for, what, three hours? And it’s already one of the best nights of my life. All because of you.”

You didn’t have words to respond, so you didn’t try. Instead, you pulled him down into a deep, slow kiss, pouring all your love into it.

When he pulled back, his expression had shifted slightly, a playful glint returning to his eyes. “You’re amazing, Y/N,” he said, his lips brushing against yours. “Can I show you how amazing you are? Please?”

You barely had time to process his words before his hands were slipping under the hem of your dress, his lips finding yours again in a kiss that was somehow even more intense than the last.

“That’s what you want for your birthday?” Your eyes flutter as you feel his warm fingertips navigating themselves home, each tap driving you more insane and impatient.

“That’s what I want for my birthday.”

You want to let him have what he wants so bad, because you know after everything you did for him to tonight, he was going to fuck you until you couldn’t hear, see, or do anything other than cum and cry. But it’s his birthday. And he was too grateful and sweet to ask for your mouth—but you know deep down, his length is aching for the feeling of your warm, salivated mouth, going up and down on his length. He loves to see you on your knees, talking him in like the good girl you are, swallowing everything he has, all for you.

Your right hand sneaks around his throat seductively, making him swallow intensely. He loves when you show him who he belongs to, you can hear it in his erratic breathing, and see it in his eyes that shut tight the second he felt your hand. You press your lips to his once more, sensually grazing your tongue against bus own. “That’s so sweet, baby.” You peck, before leaving a trace of your lips from his lips, to his jaw, to his ear. “And I’m going to let you have what you want. But first,”

His breath hitches as your hand tightens around his throat, his eyes darkening with a mix of lust and submission. He loves this—loves when you take control, when you remind him who he belongs to. His cock twitches against your thigh, already hard and aching for your touch. You can feel the heat radiating from him, the way his body trembles slightly under your grip.

"Please," he whispers, his voice rough and desperate. "I need you."

You smirk, pulling back just enough to see the hunger in his eyes. "You need me, huh?" you tease, your voice low and sultry. "What do you need, baby? Tell me."

He groans, his hips bucking involuntarily. "I need your mouth," he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. "I need to feel your lips around me, your tongue—fuck, Y/N, please."

You release your grip on his throat, trailing your fingers down his chest until you reach the waistband of his pants. You can feel the heat of his cock through the fabric, and you take your time, teasing him as you slowly undo the button and pull down the zipper. His breath comes in short, ragged gasps as you finally free his length, his cock springing free, thick and throbbing.

"Look at you," you murmur, wrapping your fingers around his shaft and giving him a slow, deliberate stroke. "So hard for me already. You really do need me, don't you?"

He nods, his hands gripping the edge of the bed as he tries to keep himself from thrusting into your hand. "Yes," he breathes. "I need you so bad."

You lean in, your lips brushing against the tip of his cock before you take him into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the sensitive head. He moans, his hips jerking as you take him deeper, your lips sliding down his length until he hits the back of your throat. You relax, letting him push even further, your nose pressing against his pelvis as you take all of him.

"Fuck," he groans, his hands tangling in your hair as you begin to move, your mouth working him with a rhythm that has him seeing stars. You can feel him throbbing in your mouth, the taste of him driving you wild as you suck and lick, your tongue teasing the sensitive underside of his cock.

His moans grow louder, more desperate, and you know he's close. You pull back, letting his cock slip from your mouth with a wet pop, and look up at him with a wicked grin. "Not yet," you say, your voice dripping with mischief. "I want to make you beg for it."

He whimpers, his cock twitching as you stroke him slowly, your thumb brushing over the tip and spreading the precum that's gathered there. "Please," he begs, his voice breaking. "Please, Y/N, I need to cum. I need to feel you."

You smile, leaning in to take him into your mouth once more, your hand working the base of his cock as you suck him hard and fast. His hips buck, his fingers tightening in your hair as he thrusts into your mouth, his moans growing louder and more frantic. You can feel him pulsing, his cock swelling as he gets closer and closer to the edge.

"Y/N," he gasps, his voice strained. "I'm gonna—fuck, I'm gonna cum!"

You hum around his cock, the vibrations sending him over the edge as he explodes in your mouth, his cum flooding your throat as you swallow every last drop. He moans your name, his body trembling as he rides out the waves of pleasure, his cock twitching as you continue to suck him through his orgasm.

The two of you sit there for a moment; you pressing soft kisses to his length while he takes deep breaths in attempt to get himself together. It’s amusing to see how riled up he already is, and he hasn’t even been inside you yet.

A seductive chuckle from Jungwon breaks your brief pause. “You love me, don’t you.” He slurs, still in disbelief of how amazing that just felt.

Your head leans to the left, your eyes filled with fake innocence as your cheek rests gently on his thigh. “You know I love you, baby.”

His head lifts, and his eyes—those eyes that always have a way of making you melt—are burning into you, speaking a thousand words without uttering a single one. The unspoken message is clear: You’re his, and he’s utterly obsessed with you. Every part of you, inside and out, and he always will be. You’re stuck with him

His gaze confirms what his tone already warned you—you weren’t in control anymore, and you wouldn’t be for the rest of the night. His eyes summon you to slowly rise from his thigh, crawling up his body, your eyes refusing to leave his.

9:00AM

The sun filters softly through the curtains as you stir awake, tangled in a mess of sheets and limbs. Jungwon is pressed against you, his arm draped lazily over your waist, and you can feel the rise and fall of his chest as he breathes steadily. His bare skin is warm against yours, and the memories of last night flicker through your mind like a reel of fireworks.

You smile to yourself, brushing a strand of hair from his face as you press a kiss to his forehead. “Happy birthday, baby,” you whisper. He doesn’t stir, just buries his face further into your neck, muttering something incoherent in his sleep.

Not wanting to disturb him, you carefully slide out of bed, grabbing his phone to FaceTime his parents. They answer on the second ring, their faces lighting up with joy.

“Y/N!” his mom greets warmly, her voice soft but full of excitement. “Where’s the birthday boy?”

You tilt the camera toward Jungwon, who’s still sprawled out in bed, looking utterly peaceful. “Still knocked out,” you chuckle. “But I wanted you to see him on his big day.”

His parents laugh, their love for him evident even through the screen. “Thank you for taking care of him,” his dad says sincerely.

“Of course,” you reply. “He’s my favorite person.”

After a short conversation, you promise to call them back later when Jungwon’s awake and hang up. You tiptoe out of the room, pulling on one of Jungwon’s oversized shirts and heading into the living room.

The sight waiting for you is nothing short of hilarious. Your apartment looks like the aftermath of a wild sleepover. Pillows and blankets are scattered everywhere, with guests passed out in various states of disarray. Sunoo is curled up on the couch with Taehyun, both of them snoring softly. Heeseung is somehow asleep in the kitchen, his head resting on the table, while Jake and Jay are sprawled out on the floor, their arms flung over each other like they’d just survived a battle.

You stifle a laugh, feeling a swell of pride for pulling off such a perfect night. Even though your apartment looks like a tornado hit it, it was all worth it.

You start picking up stray cups and plates, humming softly to yourself. As you’re gathering a pile of empty bottles, you feel a familiar warmth and weight of someone’s gaze on you.

Turning toward the hallway, you find Jungwon leaning against the wall, his hair messy, his bare chest illuminated by the soft morning light. His eyes are heavy-lidded, his signature bedroom look, and his lips curve into a sleepy, playful smile.

“You’re not seriously trying to clean up by yourself, are you?” he murmurs, his voice still rough from sleep.

You grin at him, setting down the bottles. “Someone has to, and everyone else is… well, indisposed.”

He pushes off the wall and walks toward you, his gaze softening with every step. When he reaches you, his hands slide around your waist, pulling you close. “Come back to bed,” he whispers, his lips brushing your ear. “We’ll clean everything up later. Together. But right now, I just want you.”

You bite your lip, looking up at him. “You sure? The place is a mess.”

“I don’t care,” he says, his forehead resting against yours. “Last night was perfect. You’re perfect. Let me spend my birthday morning with you, not cleaning up after everyone else.”

Your heart melts at his words, and you let him guide you back toward the bedroom. He pulls you under the covers, wrapping you in his arms and holding you close.

“Happy birthday, Jungwon,” you whisper again, your voice soft.

He smiles, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Best birthday ever, baby. And it’s only just started.”

And in that moment, with him holding you like you’re the only thing that matters, you know he means it.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

A Man Called Danger 2

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, violence, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You avoid drama, you avoid confrontation, and overall, you avoid men. But some men can’t be denied. ~ short!late 30s reader

Characters: biker!Bucky Barnes

Note: I have no chill.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

The morning comes too soon as you toss and turn through the night. You drag yourself out of bed and wrap yourself in your housecoat before braving the cold floors of the house. It isn’t a big place but it traps draughts like a tundra cavern.

You put on a pot of coffee to brew and go through your typical routine. That day is different as you listen for Eva. You told yourself last night, you’re going to lay off. You’re going to let her figure herself out.

As you take a jar of prepared overnight oats out of the fridge and fish out a protein bar for the mid-afternoon, you hear your sister sniff. She yawns as she enters. To your surprise and relief, she dressed, presentably so. She leans on the other side of the counter and flicks her lashes.

“Coffee?” She asks, sounding only a bit desperate.

“Some left,” you confirm.

She grumbles and comes around to get her own mug and pours with another yawn. You could say it. I told you so. I told you not to stay out late for your first day. At least she’s awake.

“Good luck,” you say as you zip up your small lunch bag.

“Right,” she turns and leans on the granite and blows over the mug. You peek over your shoulder as she narrows her eyes. “How did you find me last night?”

You withhold a sigh. You don’t want to argue. You don’t need her walking into her first day in a mood.

“Eva, we can talk later.”

She’s quiet, “really? You’re tracking me?”

You grab your mug, “I really need to get ready.”

“Sure,” she scoffs.

Silence roils and you make yourself face her. “I deleted it last night, okay? I meant it. You’re an adult. You’re going to do what you’re going to do.”

“You still did that,” she says.

“I did and I’m sorry,” you admit. “I won’t make excuses. We can’t keep doing this.” You chew your lip and tap your fingers on the porcelain cup, “I just hope this works out. It’ll be nice for you to have some extra cash.”

“Sure,” she shrugs.

You leave it. She’s going to simmer for a while. In her shoes, you would too. You take your coffee into the bathroom and put it on the counter. As you open the mirror to grab your face cleanser, you wince. You blow through your lips as you shut the reflective door.

You put the bottle down and untie your house coat. You roll up your camisole and cringe. You gently touch the tender spot along your ribs. It's bruised pretty good. The bone hurts too but you’re not too worried about a break.

You shudder and ignore the soreness as you go through the steps. Cleanse, moisturise, tone. Brush your teeth, figure out your hair. Then only a swipe of mascara, a tint of lip stain, and a subtle kiss from your blush stick. Natural but something. You were never one for the whole primer to highlighter parade.

You put on a striped blue blouse and a pair of grey herringbone pants. You spritz a bit of jasmine body spray over yourself then go to get your lunch and purse. You step into your leather loafers and shrug on your beige jacket.

“Eva, am I driving you?” You call down.

“Coming,” she scuffles around unseen before she appears.

If she isn’t in the best mood, she does look her best. She’s added a rosegold chain to her skirt and sweater combo, and a pair of slingback kitten heels, some earrings, and her face and hair are just perfectly done. Not too much, not too little. Her freckles peek through and give her a little extra character.

“Wow, you look nice,” you praise.

“Really? You look dead inside,” she snickers.

You’re relieved that she’s joking. You take it with a shrug, “Time of death, I’d say ten years ago.” She rolls her eyes, “you bring something to eat?”

“Nah, I looked up the place. It’s near Sage. I’ll go there.”

“Okay,” you accept. You’re not sure where she got the money to do so. You eat in chronically but she’s always out with her friends getting all the fancy lattes and fusions.

You head out, not used to the company. It's about time she got something going. She worked at the dentist office for a summer in high school but she hated her boss. You told her that she probably always will. Lord knows you’re no fan of yours.

“No pressure, but try to make this one work, Eva,” you say. “I called in a favour for it.”

“I know,” she snips. “You don’t need to remind me. I didn’t ask, you know?”

“I’m not—I just—I only want the best,” you resign. “I shouldn’t project. I know you will do wonderfully.”

She blows a raspberry, “alright, cheesy.”

You steer along the usual route. Her building is only a block from yours. You drop her off like you would outside school. Her teen years were rough. For you, but not her. After you left her with your mom, you made sure she got to graduation. You feel like you owe her so much more for abandoning her for so long. If you hadn’t though, would you be here? Would you be able to get her out at all?

You continue down to your office building. There’s a loud rumble behind you. A motorcycle. You hate the things. They remind you of someone you’d rather not think of. Not to mention they’re noisy and put out pollution like crazy.

You flip on your blinker as the early morning rider skims past you. Your parking past dangles from the rear view as you find a spot in the grid. You gather up your things and ready yourself for another day.

You march inside and opt for the stairs. You try to skip the elevator at least three times a week. Your job keeps you idle far too much. Even with a standing desk. As you climb, your breath picks up and the bruise on your side throbs. You should’ve popped some advil.

You get to your floor and get yourself set up. You raise the desk and straighten the standing mat. You sign into your station and start down the new list of orders. As you ease into the morning, others arrive and groggily do the same.

Your fingers skitter over the keyboard in a flurry. As you send another request to the mail dock, a shadow appears in your peripheral. Mr. Walker leans the corner of your desk. For a moment, you wonder if he has a brother or cousin that likes to troll the bars for young girls.

Your boss puts his other hand on his hip. Even with your desk raised, he dwarfs it with his size. You pause your typing and look at him.

“Morning, Mr. Walker,” you say.

“Morning,” he returns. “I didn’t even see you here, hiding.”

That’s the problem. Standing, sitting, no one notices you behind the double monitors.

“Big day, huh?” He asks.

You stare at him, confused for a moment.

“Yeah, Hansen was saying your sister starts today?”

“Right, uh, yeah,” you affirm. “Thanks, again. I really appreciated the referral.”

“You’re a hard worker,” he says.

“Thank you, sir.”

“Hansen is a bit of a hard ass. I should’ve warned you.” He adds.

You nearly blurt out your first thought; look who’s talking.

“I’m sure she’ll do fine, she is your sister,” he remarks as his fingers curl around the corner of the desk. “Really kind of you to take her in.”

You don’t think you’ve ever spoken so much to Walker. Not since you asked him to put in a good word for Eva. Even then, he kept to his short replies and grunts.

“She’s family,” you say.

“Sure, but... I don’t know. Thought you would already have one of those,” he replies. You tweak a brow. “Kids, husband? I always sort of assumed...”

“A woman my age, yeah.”

“I wouldn’t... no, not because of that, I just... you’re very responsible.”

“Thank you, sir,” you shift on your soles. “I was just getting started on that Lafayette order.”

“Mmmm,” he hums and tilts his head. He drags his hand down his tie. He’s a big man. Most people are compared to you but he’s gargantuan. “Always working hard.”

“Yes, sir,” you look at your screen and click on the spreadsheet, changing the cell colour of the last completed order.

“Let me know if there’s anything else you need from me,” he slaps the corner of your desk then struts off.

You stay focused on your screens. That was strange but you’re not stupid. He’s reminding you of his favour. He wants you to remember that you owe him. You’re sure you’ll be picking up overtime to pay him back.

Work rolls on. Dull, repetitive, but it pays the bills. You eat your oats at your desk as you make your way through the daily rota. You can’t help but notice Mr. Walker’s frequent trips to the break room. It tempts you to grab a coffee yourself as your eyes burn but you resist. You're trying to cut back on caffeine.

When the day ends, your protein bar sits beside the base of your monitor. You’re hungry but you can wait for supper. You sign off and lock your desk. You check your phone. No messages from Eva. Is that good or bad?

As you come into the overcast afternoon, the day weighs in your shoulders and hips. All day you can’t wait to be done but by the time you’re free, you’re exhausted. You dig out your keys and traipse along the row of bumpers to your car.

You hit the button to unlock the Honda and the roar of a motorcycle tears through the air. To your surprise, it only gets louder. You have the door open as its shadow rolls up behind your car. You throw your bags into the passenger seat and ignore it. That is until, the engine quiets and the steel beast doesn’t move from behind your vehicle.

Don’t tell me Eva hopped on someone’s bike. She would. A final act of rebellion before she surrenders to corporate purgatory. You look over, further disappointed by what really awaits you.

The man in leather undoes his helmet, vintage without a visor or anything. He tucks it under his arm and slides off his sunglasses. You recognise him. That’s not good.

His jacket is zipped to his chin but you’re certain that gold medallion hangs against his chest. It’s the same man as the night before. The one that was a little too late. How did he find you?

You shake your head and dip into the driver’s seat. Before you can close the door, his gloved hand is on it. He keeps it open as he steps up. You sigh.

“Sir, would you kindly move your bike?” You drone as you ram your keys into the ignition.

“Hey, doll, just wanna talk,” he says.

“I have somewhere to be,” you reach for the door and he steps closer, inserting himself so you couln’t close if you try.

You keep your eyes aimed at the windshield. Your other hand reaches for your purse. He clucks.

"Now, you don't gotta go calling anyone. Got a few buddies on the force I wouldn't mind catching up with but I'm being good," he steps back and shows his palms. "Just curious."

"I said I'm on my way somewhere--" you begin and grip the wheel.

"To get your daughter? You're a good mom--"

You stay silent. There's not much you can say that won't make this worse. It's none of your business. Piss off. A few choice epithets.

You search the brick wall ahead of you. Your heart beats faster and faster. No matter how you avoid men, they make themselves a problem.

You grab the shifter and crank it. You hit the gas and jerk backwards. You hit his bike and it crashes with a clatter. He let's go of the door as the door jars him.

"The fuck?" He exclaims.

You have just enough room to turn through the empty spot next to you. It's a deep spin of the wheel but you manage to redirect and roll past his bike.

As you swerve around and set the car straight, you glance over. He rubs his shoulder as he watches you, approaching his overturned bike with stunned steps. To your surprise, there's a big grin across his face.

Shit.

You stomp the pedal and tear out of the lot. You don't look as you turn into traffic and you squeeze the wheel until your knuckles hurt. What the fuck!

[achromatophoric]

Divina: Yoko! What the actual shit?!

Yoko: Babe, it’s not what it looks like!

Divina: Oh really? Cause it looks AND sounds like you’re listening to a recording your best friend blowing out her girlfriend’s back.

Indeed, the vampire sits on her bed with her laptop open and playing what can only be Wednesday’s seemingly indecipherable cries of ecstasy.

Yoko: 😬

Divina: 😠

Divina: *icily* Well?

Yoko: *blurts out* COOKIES! I think. Maybe brownies?

Divina:

Divina: What?

Yoko: Shit. Look, babe, lemme explain. Addams isn’t moaning.

Laptop: *filthy moan*

Divina: 😒

Yoko: *winces* Okay, she IS moaning, but she isn’t just moaning. If you listen carefully—THERE!

Laptop: *gibberish*

Divina: 🤨

Divina: So Wednesday doesn’t make sense when she’s getting railed. Bravo, Enid. Not helping your case, though.

Yoko: I thought the same! But she’s actually speaking in Old Latin—at least this time she is.

Divina: What?

Yoko: Oh, last time it was Sumerian. And the time before that—

Divina: No, I mean what, as in what the fuck?

Yoko: Right. Uh. So long story short, I’ve been recording their erm… their sessions—

Divina: 😡

Yoko: —so I could translate what Wednesday was saying! See? Totally not pervy.

Divina: 😐

Divina: 😤

Divina: *through gritted teeth* Yoko, I swear by the Seven Seas, I am about five seconds from—

Yoko: Recipes! Babe, she’s reciting fucking RECIPES.

Divina: 🤨

Divina: Recipes for what? Disasters?

Yoko: Nope. Recipes for the most mind blowing, absurdly tasty-as-fuck pastries that will ever bless your mouth.

Divina: *incredulous stare*

Divina: You’re telling me that Wednesday Arsenic-is-a-Seasoning Addams recites entire goddamn recipes in dead languages—

Divina: —recipes for ludicrously delicious baked goods, whenever Enid bangs the grumpy out of her?

Yoko: *hopeful* Yes. That is exactly what I’m saying.

Divina: 🤦

Yoko: Babe? Do you need an ibuprofen? That vein is—

Divina: Give me a cookie.

Yoko: Er, what?

Divina: *holds out a hand* Or a brownie. Muffin. Whatever the fuck you made from one of these supposed recipes. If one isn’t in my hand in ten seconds…

Yoko: 😲

Yoko: *scrambles to her desk, rummages, and return with something*

Yoko: Here! Try this! Made this one yesterday.

Divina: *takes the…* Churro. This is just a churro.

Yoko: Trust, babe. I promise you, it’ll all make sense. Just try it.

Divina: *eyes the churro*

Divina: *takes a bite*

Divina: *chews*

Yoko: So whatcha think?

Divina:

Divina: *filthy moan*

Yoko: *relieved fist pump*

Divina: Holy… Holy fucking shit. I think my tongue just came. What the actual fucking fuck?

Yoko: So am I off the hook?

Divina: Off the hook? Babe, imma need more like this, stat. Does she do this every time?

Yoko: Just about. Toughest part is the actual translating.

Divina: I’ll get Bianca’s help.

Yoko: You think she’d be interested?

Divina: Are you kidding me? She once kneecapped me at swim camp over the last cupcake.

Yoko: Yikes. Okay, so wanna help me translate the rest of this one?

Divina: Sure. Do I just try writing the phonetics for this part?

Laptop: *slurred post-orgasm gibberish*

Yoko: *quickly stops the recording* Oh fuck no. NEVER the shit after she comes.

Divina: Why is that? Are those recipes not-so-great?

Yoko: Less recipe, more ritual. I only tried one and that summoned The Bone Gorger.

Divina: 🫢

Divina: How… how’d you get rid of them?

Yoko: Churro.

Divina:

Divina: *wipes away drool* Yeah, that checks out.

[xfgpng]

— [ nsfw ] :: threesome, DP!, cunnilingus, fingering

— wc :: 1.3k

💌 (here for comms)

the sand on the beach is warm this time of day. it’s mostly dark thanks to the ocean and anyone else would be scared to be out here alone and maybe apart of her is but she’s always been drawn to the ocean and the cold breeze.

in a similar way, she’s always been drawn to the darkness and the beach lights are dim enough to create a little safe space for her to sit and think.

most nights, she wouldn’t walk so near to the water, it’s just too dark and while she could swim, this was taking a different kind of risk.

“scared sweetheart?”

the voice comes from somewhere behind her but when she turns, there’s nothing there. in the distance she can make out her villa but that’s about it. it’s too late for anyone else to be awake.

she looks towards the water and her heart stops. there’s a man, floating around the water like it’s the most natural thing to do at this time of night but he looks … different.

for one, it’s not halloween but his outfit would make it seem that way. the blue looks good against his skin and the tattoos look pretty.. she’s almost too lost in thought to notice how much closer she is to the water, her toes touch the edge and she gasps at how cold it is.

“we watch you come out here most nights”

it’s another voice and the sight of the taller man on the rocks sends a shiver down her spine but she’s not sure if it’s unpleasant or not.

he too, looks like he’s ready for some costume party. a dragon perhaps? his red eyes are glowing and it’s more prominent because of how dark the ocean makes everything.

she wants to run, she probably should and she’d likely make it home on time but she doesn’t.

“who… are you guys?” she finds herself asking

“sylus” the taller man says and she swears she sees his .. tail? moving

“rafayel” the other man says and he’s grinning at her. she’s not sure what’s so funny right now but she’s not going to ask either.

“why are you out here by yourself?” sylus grins, moving closer to her, his long black tail wrapping around her waist. her eyes widen.

“i like it here” she shrugs, “.. is that—”

“real?” rafayel laughs and as he swims closer, she sees it.

“oh my god” her jaw drops. a beautiful tail, long and shiny. the moonlight catches the scales giving off the illusion that it sparkles, though she suspects it’s not an illusion after all.


she’s pinched her own thigh twice and it hurts but worst of all, she’s not dreaming.

“why don’t you join me?” rafayel all but purrs, “the water isn’t so deep here”

“why on earth would i do that?” she takes a step back, bumping up against sylus, “it’s cold .. and dark and i don’t even know you!”

“but you can get to know us darling” sylus whispers, cupping her jaw softly. his long nails lightly trail up the side of her neck.

“is this some kind of joke?” she glares but even as she says it, she knows it’s not.

she can’t understand why she’s not making a run for it or why she’s still allowing sylus to hold her and move closer to rafayel again.

“the ocean is safe… as long as i’m with you” rafayel grins, reaching out to hold her ankle.

“so pretty” he coos, grinning.

“she is, isn’t she?” sylus whispers against her ear, kissing her jaw, “is this okay beautiful?”

she finds herself nodding, looking out at the water and then at rafayel.

sylus lays her down on the warm sand, right in the water. he’s sharp nails nip at her skin and she hisses, biting her lip to suppress a moan.

“oh.. she likes that” rafayel chuckles, swimming closer until he’s upper body hovers over hers, “you’re not scared?”

“… i’d say it’s more confused arousal right now” she mumbles.

sylus laughs loud, the sound rich and deep that sends a shiver through her body once more. she could blame it on the cool air hitting her skin as rafayel lifts her dress up but his body is warm and wet against her own.

“between us, there are 4” he grins, his eyes darkening and she’s heard stories of his kind. lemurians and she knows the tales of mermen who become so obsessed with their human that they can become dangerous.

the same would go for dragons, while they are highly intelligent and primal creatures, their love knows no bounds.

still, she didn’t bother to study any of their anatomy and up until now, that’s not something that has ever crossed her mind.

her eyes widen as she feels cold and wet fingers against her core.

“open up” sylus says softly as he sinks down onto the sand beside her. he cups her breasts, gently grazing her nipple. it stings for a moment before it’s replaced by his wet tongue.

“oh” she gasps, her hands gripping rafayel’s shoulder and in that moment of bliss, rafayel slips two long fingers into her as sylus plays with her body.

sylus uses his tail to wrap around her bare thigh and keep her legs open. she was truly a sight to behold and he’d have to kill anyone else that walked by tonight.

no one else could have the pleasure of seeing her laid out before them, the moon illuminating her beautiful skin. no one else should.

“the things i want to do to you” rafayel says, biting her earlobe as his fingers move faster. he wants to take his time but he knows they don’t have much time before the sun comes up.

she’s hoisted up by sylus’ tail so he can sit underneath her, keeping her against his chest.

“good girl” he purrs, still massaging her breasts, pinching her nipples as he kisses and nips at her neck.

“she’s perfect” rafayel groans as he leans down to suck on her clit. he moans into her pussy, his own eyes rolling back as she moans.

“fuck” she moans louder and sylus takes the opportunity to kiss her, his hand sliding down her body to rub her clit as rafayel eats her pussy like a starved man.

she feels sylus underneath her, both of his thick cocks rubbing between her ass and thighs. she feels so overstimulated in the best way.

“too much?” he teases and she nods, though she’s not sure because she doesn’t want them to stop.

rafayel lifts his head and licks his lips.

“you taste so good” rafayel groans, kissing her thigh.

“don’t be greedy” sylus grins, lifting her up, “you ready?”

she’s nervous but she nods.

“yes” she says, “please… just —”

he gently thrusts up into her, not both just yet because he knows it might be too much for her and he doesn’t want to hurt her as much as he wishes he could be inside her completely.

“there you go gorgeous” rafayel praises, his own cock pressing against her entrance too, “how about we practice hm?”

she’s too overwhelmed to speak but even in her haze, she sees him pressing in and she thinks she screams but she’s not sure anymore.

everything feels so good despite how full she feels. she can feel them moving together inside her and she looks down to see the bulge.

“hurts” she moans but she loves it. it’s the kind of pain she happily takes as she’s bounced on their cocks.

her legs are shaking and she’s only a little worried about not being able to walk but she’s too far gone now to care.

rafayel’s moans are louder and deeper while sylus is more breathy as he groans in her ear and when rafayel kisses her, she cums so hard she thinks her has an out of body experience.

though she was always one for the dramatics after all.

[starheavenly]

https://www.tumblr.com/starheavenly/774872421568299008/drift-and-all-his-babies-from-different-universes

I love how OG!Locket is sulking in bed. Even when surrounded by their alternate versions, they’re still the smallest bot in the group—and they know it. That pout speaks volumes, and let’s be honest, they’re probably jealous of the attention their counterparts are receiving from Drift. Of course, they’d never admit it outright, but you can see it in the way they’re lying there, stewing in quiet indignation. Classic Dramatic Baby 1.

D!Locket, on the other hand, looks like they’re plotting world domination from under the blanket. They are probably

scheming to take out the others. Since they believe they are superior to their counterparts. And to reclaim what they see as their right, Drift’s attention and affection. Again probably not that they would admit it. Dramatic Baby 2

A!Locket, poor thing, looks utterly overwhelmed. They’re probably overthinking everything about this situation, especially when it comes to Drift. Since they chose to follow Ratchet in their own universe, they might be worried that Drift doesn’t love them anymore. And being sandwiched aside two grumpy, intimidating versions of themselves definitely isn’t helping their nerves. You can just see the anxious thought spirals: “Does drift hate me? Does Drift even want me here? What if I’m not good enough?”

Then there’s SG!Locket—poor baby finally getting the love they’ve always dreamed of. After everything they’ve endured, being able to rest in the warmth of Drift’s affection must feel like a miracle. You can almost hear their relieved, content thoughts: “He loves me back. He really loves me!” It’s such a heart-wrenching contrast to the life they’ve known, and you just know they’re holding on to every second of this rare kindness. (OG!Drift would absolutely despise his Shattered Glass counterpart, SG!Drift. It wouldn’t just be dislike—it’d be pure, murderous hatred for what that twisted version represents.)

And Drift? He’s having the absolute best moment of his life. His spark is practically glowing as he’s there, surrounded by his precious sparklet and their alternate versions. Every one of them is a piece of his family, and he loves them all dearly, no matter their quirks or histories. Drift’s thoughts are simple yet deeply heartfelt:

“They’re all so precious. I’ll stay right here and make sure they’re safe and happy. Nothing will ever hurt them while I’m around.”

I believe that if given the chance, Drift would steal all of them without hesitation.

YES YES YES people analyzing a silly picture of all of them tucked in bed...

Main Locket, the usual suspect.

D!Locket: Views everyone as lesser than them

A!Locket: SEVERE anxiety and self esteem issues

SG!Locket: Sweet little thang <333

[hrrtshape]

　loa myths. . . the evil eye.

we all know it’s the girlboss’s (you!! right there!!) favourite scapegoat, the every girl’s cosmic parking ticket. lost your airpods? evil eye. broke a nail on a fresh set? evil eye. crush left you on read? evil eye. it's the metaphysical equivalent of blaming mercury retrograde except, instead of the planets, it's allegedly powered by the scorn of envious onlookers and mediterranean aunties with olympic-level side-eye. but does it actually exist? or have we all just been psychologically waterboarded by folklore and tumblr witches with a mean streak?????

hi. i’m emma aka hrrtshape aka losing my mind, and this is my series on loa myths. let’s dissect.

if you’re even slightly invested in the law of assumption, if you’ve ever whispered "i've already gotten 100% on my maths exam" at your school's bathroom mirror like it’s conjuration, you know the doctrine : you, and you alone, script your reality. no outside forces. no vengeful spirits. no astral hitmen waiting to kneecap you for posting a thirst trap.

so tell me why the evil eye gets a free pass?

loa is built on one principle : your assumptions are reality. not your mother’s assumptions, not your hater’s assumptions, not the assumptions of some girl in your comments section who thinks you don’t deserve nice things. if someone could curse you just by glaring at your holiday pics with a heart full of malice, that would mean they have power over you. and that? that does not compute. not with neville goddard, not with logic, not with anything that doesn’t require a tinfoil hat.

"but wait," the superstitious cry, "what about all those stories? the ones where people start succeeding and suddenly, inexplicably, the universe bitch-slaps them back down?"

ok, sure. but let’s engage the last two brain cells standing : correlation is not causation. you didn’t spiral because someone hexed you. you spiralled because you expected backlash. because deep down, you still believe success comes at a cost. this isn’t the evil eye. this is self-sabotage in designer packaging. a cognitive bias with a mood ring. in other words, it's your own doing. sorry !! i say this from experience !!

and at its core, the evil eye is about envy. the idea that someone else’s jealousy is potent enough to kneecap your manifestations is, frankly, embarrassing. you’re telling me their side-eye holds more weight than your own self-concept????? that’s giving way too much credit to people who aren’t even in your tax bracket, let alone competing with the amazing-ness of your mind. if your reality is dictated by your own mind, why would anyone else’s bad vibes even make the guest list?

if the evil eye were real in the way people claim, it would mean that everyone walking around with an ounce of jealousy is armed with some kind of psychic bazooka, capable of obliterating happiness on sight. but we know that’s not how this works. you don’t see billionaires suddenly losing all their wealth because millions of people resent them. if collective envy had that much power, the entire celebrity ecosystem would collapse overnight. taylor swift would be playing gigs at a dive bar in ohio. jeff bezos would be begging on the streets. and yet, they thrive. why???? because their self-concept, delusional or otherwise, trumps the ill will of the masses.

let’s get existential. because i'm drinking champagne in paris ( power of manifestation,,,,, btw!!! ). fear of the evil eye is just another form of externalising responsibility. it’s easier to blame anonymous haters than admit that your own doubts might be the saboteur. it’s easier to believe that bad luck is some external hex than to consider that you, deep down, might not believe you deserve good things without consequence. every time you assume the evil eye is after you, you reinforce the idea that your wins are fragile, that you are teetering on the edge of ruin at all times. and if you assume that???? congratulations, you just manifested it.

so do you need to start flinging salt over your shoulder every time you post a beach pic? no. do you need to buy another etsy-certified "evil eye protection bracelet" from a girl named sagemoon333? also no. the only thing you need protection from is your own limiting beliefs. the moment you stop believing in external threats, they stop existing.

because at the end of the day, the evil eye is like a bad plot twist: dramatic, overhyped, and only real if you decide to buy in.

but hey, believe what you want. just don’t be shocked when your own assumptions make it real.

stay tuned for part two, where we tackle [ censored ]. because if i hear one more person say [ censored ]. i’m manifesting a federal ban on that phrase !!!!!

[neeeooon]

Hey! How would the bllk boys (Bachira, Isagi, Chigiri, Rin + your choice?) React to their SO trying to break up with them bc she's insecure about not being ambitious enough and she thinks they should be with someone 'better'?

omg this made me so sad 😭 hopefully you enjoy!

when you try to break up with them because you’re insecure ;

bf bllk x fem!reader

bachira meguru

-> watching bachira dance across the field was your favorite thing in the world, but it could be bittersweet. you saw how happy it made him, and it sucked to know that you’d never feel that kind of excitement

-> the thoughts about not being good enough finally got to you, and you caved. “meg? when you have a minute?” “what’s up, y/n?”

-> you didn’t think it’d be this hard. “i… i don’t think i’m ambitious enough to be your girlfriend. i don’t have a thing like you do, and i feel like maybe i’m distracting you? like instead of being on the field, you’re with me, and that’s not fair to you and your dreams.”

-> after a moment of staring and blinking and confused looks from bachira, he jumps up and pulls you into a bone-crushing hug. “just because you don’t have a ‘thing’, doesn’t mean i don’t want you.”

-> he releases you and flashes his signature head-tilt-smile combo that wrecks your heart. “i can help you find something that drives you as much as soccer drives me, if you want! and if you don’t, that’s okay, too! but whatever it is, i want us to do it together. okay? :>”

isagi yoichi

-> after watching team blue lock play against the u20 team and win, hearing how determined your boyfriend was during the interview, watching him celebrate with his teammates, you made up your mind

-> “yoichi? can we talk?” and he starts sweating because he hasn’t seen or heard from you except for a little “congrats!” text since his game

-> you sit him down and stare into your lap as you say, “i think we should break up.”

-> he leans forward to ask why, but stops when you look up to reveal tears in your eyes. “i don’t have a dream. i’m not ambitious like you, and i don’t want to hold you back from achieving your dreams. i want you to live a full, prosperous life with someone better—“

-> and he’s kissing you. “y/n, no. i don’t… there isn’t anyone better. yes, this is my dream, but it’s a dream with you in it! and no one says prosperous, babe.”

-> you laugh at that and he helps wipe your tears away. “do you promise?” “i promise.”

chigiri hyoma

-> you loved watching chigiri regain his dream of running and playing soccer, but there were times when you felt like he was going to pass you by and not look back

-> it made you insecure, knowing he was so happy chasing after this dream that had previously been out of reach, when you didn’t have anything to compare it to. you felt like he could do better with someone who understood his struggles

-> “hyoma?” “hm?” “can i talk to you about something?” “mhm!” “something serious?” “… okay.”

-> and you tell him everything. “i feel like you could do better. like if you were with someone who truly understood your struggles and dreams, that you’d be happier. i love you, but i don’t want to be a deadweight in your future.”

-> chigiri would look at you, know you’re not joking, but still think this is a huge prank. “y/n, i’m able to run toward my dream because of you. because in my head, you’re there at the finish line. you’re not holding be back, you’re giving me something to run to.” you cried after that for sure

itoshi rin

-> though you cheered for your boyfriend and encouraged him every step of the way, you didn’t think you’d ever amount to the love and passionate rin has for soccer

-> it made you doubt yourself, seeing him so ambitious to strive for this dream when you didn’t have anything close to amounting

-> when it finally got to be too much, you pulled your boyfriend aside and kept your hands at your sides. “you are the most talented person i know.”

-> and now he’s nervous. “what’s going on, y/n?”

-> “i feel like i’m pulling you away from that when i’m around. i think your career would be better off without me dragging you down. you’re such a skilled player, rin, and i’m just—“

-> he takes your hands in his and squeezes them, almost desperately. “don’t say anything else. i don’t want to hear it, y/n, please. i can’t do this without you. you aren’t pulling me away or dragging me down, so don’t—“

-> this time it’s you who cuts him off when you fling yourself against his chest. “i’m sorry. i didn’t know… thank you for telling me.”

michael kaiser

-> omg he is terrified when you ask him to “talk” because he’s 98% sure he left the oven on and thinks you found out

-> but when you say, “i think we should break up,” his mind goes blank

-> “why.” “i just feel like you’re so focused on chasing your dream that you don’t need me… i can’t help you become a better player, and i don’t want to hold you back—“ “did i do something?” “huh?”

-> kaiser would look at you with such sad eyes, but accept this thinking that you want to leave him. “if you want to go, i won’t stop you. don’t stay with me if you aren’t happy anymore, y/n—“

-> you are confused, because how has the conversation changed this much? “what the heck, no! michael, i’m saying you can do better than me—“ “but i don’t want ‘better’! there isn’t ‘better’. i want you!”

[marauder-misprint]

A walk

Series Masterlist

Sirius Black x Fem!Slytherin!reader

1.5k words

cw: fluff

Once again, you are pacing your dorm before a date with Sirius. You had gone back to your dorm to drop off your things and change. And you pace. You can’t figure out why you’re so nervous for a walk. At least last time, it was dread holding you back. It also doesn’t help that you don’t have a Dorcas waiting for you to get your act together and just go. 

“He’s just a guy,” you tell yourself as you stop in front of the mirror. “Just a guy.” 

Just a guy who you recently fell in love with… You take a deep breath, staring at your reflection. You look good. Yes. You are as physically ready for the walk as you’ll ever be. It’s just your brain that’s preventing you from walking out of that door and meeting Sirius outside the bell tower. 

“Alright. Fuck it.”

You pass Regulus in the common room. His eyes follow you and he smirks. He doesn’t know for sure that you’re going to meet his brother, but he does know that most of your friends are in the library and you wouldn’t bother changing out of your uniform to study. You don’t make eye contact with Regulus so he doesn’t say anything. In fact, you don’t acknowledge anyone on your way out. Your tunnel vision blocks all other people out of your mind. 

You can’t help but smile when you see Sirius waiting for you. He’s not leaning against the wall or talking to anyone, just idly standing and gazing up at the sky. 

“Guess you’ll always be waiting on me,” you say as you approach him.

He smiles widely at you. 

“Better than you waiting on me.”

“Why’s that?” you ask as you start walking down one of the paths around the grounds of Hogwarts. 

“Besides that it’s never good to keep a lady waiting?” he asks with a chuckle. “It might make you think I don’t value your time or you. And I do. I don’t want to waste a moment with you.”

“Hmm. Sounds pretty sappy to me.” 

“Maybe so, but that’s what happens when I grow fond of someone.”

“Awww,” you say teasingly. “The great Sirius Black is fond of me?”

“Yes, and it’s good of you to finally acknowledge how amazing I am!” 

“Too bad great isn’t always a positive thing,” you say slyly, giving Sirius a sideways glance and a smirk.

His face shows the offense he’s taken.

“I’m kidding, Sirius,” you tell him with a laugh. “You really think I’d be here if I didn’t like you on some level?” 

“Then what’s so great about me?” 

“You want me to list them off?” 

“Just one thing then.”

“You smell nice.” 

Sirius’ grin just keeps widening with every step you take. He would be bragging to the boys later that you thought he smelled nice, serves them right for making fun of him for his expensive taste in cologne. 

Unlike your walk to Hogsmeade, Sirius doesn’t have his arm around you. You aren’t touching in any way, just walking side-by-side. You both had your hands shoved deep into your coat pockets. You slightly regret suggesting a walk in late December, but at least it guaranteed you privacy. You suppose that someone could technically be watching from an upper window somewhere inside the castle, but your conversations were private. 

“Oh, look! Jobberknolls!” you say, pointing toward the edge of Hogwarts' grounds. “I don’t think they usually come this close to the castle.”

You give Sirius a bright smile.

“Wait here,” you tell him firmly.

Then you slowly walk toward the flock of birds. If you were able to get close enough and acted carefully, you might be able to get some feathers. You stop walking when one turns to look at you. It doesn’t fly away. It chirps and a few more look at you. After a moment, you take another step. They still don’t fly away and that makes your heart soar. Once you decide you are close enough, you adjust your position so you can sit down. All of your motions are in slow motion to not spook the birds. They give you curious looks, only their heads twisting. You know Sirius is watching you but you don’t care. You haven’t interacted with a jobberknoll personally since you learned about them in Care of Magical Creatures. 

To your delight, one hops toward you and you outstretch your hand. It jumps into the side of your hand, which you take as permission to pet it. A few more start to hop toward you as well. Before you know it, you’re surrounded by most of the flock. You don’t pluck any feathers out, partially out of fear they might attack you if you harm them, but feathers that seem to have fallen out are free game. 

You realize you’ve taken a while to get a handful of feathers. You clear your throat and gently push the birds away from you so you can stand up. Putting the feathers in your pockets, you return to Sirius.

“Sorry. I got excited.”

“Don’t apologize. It’s nice seeing you live up to your Animal Person title,” he says, throwing his arm around your shoulder to pull you to his side. 

You don’t mind it. If anything, you appreciate it. This way you can smell his cologne and grow more comfortable under his arm. Your mind has definitely warmed up to the idea that this was a good place to be. 

As you start walking again, you explain all of the uses for Jobberknoll feathers that you know of and everything you remembered about them from that lesson a year or so ago. You start talking about different animals and Sirius tells you about some of the legends he’s heard about them; apparently mooncalves were involved in the resurgence of golden snidgets. Snidgets brings the conversation to quidditch and James and Regulus and all of your friends. 

It’s getting dark as you return to the castle. You haven’t missed dinner so you figure that you’ll skip out on visiting the kitchens. Maybe another time, you thought. 

“You know, Black, if you promise you’ll respond, I think I will write you over break,” you say as he opens the door to let you in.

His face lights up and you feel yourself smiling at him. Gods, how can someone be this attractive?

“You will?” 

“If you promise you’ll respond,” you repeat yourself. 

“Yes, of course, love. It’ll be the highlight of my day!”

You nod, biting the inside of your cheeks as if to suppress your urge to laugh at his eagerness.

“You know, you really are something else, love,” Sirius says.

“Isn’t that why you like me?”

“I mean, I fell for you while trying to get you to like me.”

“Fell for me?”

“Oh, darling, can’t you tell?”

You laugh. “Maybe I want to hear you say it. Fully.”

“I’m doomed. So beyond doomed.”

“Say it, Black,” you tease.

“I’ve fallen in love with you. You’ve made getting you here a challenge but now that you are, Merlin… I really, really want you to stay.”

“You want me to stay, huh,” you repeat with a lilting voice. 

He scoffs but his smile doesn’t dim. “I give a confession of my affection and this, this!, is the response I get.” 

You tsk him. “You’re confession was missing one vital question though.”

He cocks his head at you in confusion. 

“What question?”

“Well, it would just sound silly coming from me since it was your confession.”

“But if you were to ask the question. What, erm, what would it be?”

“Coming from me,” you start to say as you look away from Sirius for a moment. “Sirius, would you do the honors of letting me be your girlfriend?”

He stops walking, staring at you with a dumbfounded look on his face. That question. And you had been the one to ask it. Despite having said he was in love with you, Sirius thought it was too soon to ask. He thought you’d need more time, more dates, something more substantial from him before putting a label on it. 

“You… You want to be my girlfriend?” 

“Sirius,” you groan. “I’m not asking again.” 

“So we’re dating then.”

You nod, once again biting the inside of your cheeks. He sure was an idiot at times, but he made it work. 

“Oh! And just so you know, the offer still stands.”

You give him a confused look. You hadn’t discussed any offers on your walk.

“To visit the Potters over break. To see Padfoot, or me,” he explains. “You could floo in. Or they’ve got a muggle car. We can come get you. Or meet you somewhere.”

“Oh… My parents can be kind of strict about how much I go out… But I’ll see what I can do to convince them.”

As you walk into dinner, you debate if you should tell Regulus about this new development or keep him out of the loop for now. You laugh to yourself as you imagine his reaction if he found out from a Ravenclaw or Mulciber or, really, anyone but you.

tags: @2dloveshp, @yearninglustfully, @made-for-oliverwood, @ilovejamespottersomuch, @hisparentsgallerryy, @itsseaberri, @corawithfanfiction, @devilslittlehelper, @jllyunn, @barnes70stark,

tags: @crowleythesexydemon, @flow33didontsmoke, @navs-bhat, @louweenier, @l0g0phobe,

@ellouisa17, @theendofthematerialgworl, @marina468, @bmyva1entine, @ravisinghs-wife, @azure-drag0ness, @sunowee, @mysteriouslyperfecttiger

The next chapter will be that last official chapter for this series. I might do additional content later on if inspiration strikes. Again, thank you for all the love you have shown this series :)

[xxstylefntsyxx]

I WANNA RUIN OUR FRIENDSHIP, WE SHOULD BE LOVERS INSTEAD

[Part 1]- [Part 2]-[you are here]

Continuation I ran out of words what the fuck so this is a finale and small story.

"You sure you wanna do this? If you're not sure, you can just stop here." He asked you gently, holding your hips in place. You adjusted your hips, feeling his cock slide against your clit. You moaned, twitching slightly at the tip, lightly touching it each time you moved. He chuckled, "Mm okay, okay. That's fine honey, just wanted to make sure you were sure." He whispered. He placed is hands on your hips, a tight grip that made you hum.

"You know I've thought about doing this to you. A lot, o really just wanted to hold you and make you feel special." He placed himself at your entrance, "Something special, in my opinion. But another part of me just wanted to hear you."

He slowly filled you, making you whine. He was big, fit snuggly in between your wet folds. He whimpered at the warmth enveloping him.

"Wan-you to hold me. F-for a while!" You moaned. He leaned down, angling himself into your cervix, "Me too, pretty girl♡ lemme make that up to you."

Picking away at your cervix at an alarming speed, you couldn't catch your breath. “Shit!” You groaned. Feeling his Galla slap your clit in a wet manner. You arched instinctively into him, whining and moaning. He smirked against your neck, “That feel good? Yeah?” It was hot and your face felt like it was on fire. There was a knock but you two ignored it. Too content in the way he fucked your cervix. A coil built in your stomach making you stutter, “C-ah! Cumming!”

That hot coil burst and you came. He groaned a, “Good fucking girl.” And came right after. You two pushed against each other in ecstasy. Eyes rolled back and panting like dogs. He decorated you in more kisses and praise, still coming down from his own. Yeah, he definitely has to do that again. This time a but more gentler. He was living with the view of you on your stomach, sweat glistening and cunt plugged with his cock. “Shit, gotta get you cleaned up at least.” he said hopping off the bed.

“How the fuck?” You whispered, “Are you moving around!?”

You slowly got up to look at him walking around like an hour of your life didn’t just get sucked out of you. Hair fucked up, lips swollen, eyes puffy, and body barely even keeping you up. Daisuke turned around, “Pink or Blue towel and because I haven’t had sex since I was like eighteen man. I’m pretty fit out, stamina unmatched.”

“That isn’t how that goes jackass! Look at me!” You uttered pointing half-assed at yourself. Daisuke giggled, “Just say you couldn’t take it.”

You threw his pillow at his face, a goofy grin in your face, “I’m not too tired to fuck you up!” He dodged it moving out the way of the pillow, letting it hit the dresser, “Too tired to take the time to aim?”

“Give me the blue one.” You sighed in defeat. You could feel his dumbass staring at you. “If you’re laughing I’ll kill you.” You claimed. Daisuke chuckled, “Sure pretty. Now! Open up, lemme clean you.”

The Next Day

It was breakfast, awfully quiet you could only hear the food being cooked on the stove. You two were sitting at the table. Rubbing your necks and pulling your clothes up against the scars of your previous night. Jimmy was sitting by Swansea with a face of shock and disappointment, while Swansea was relaxed and had a content smile. Curly and Anya on the other hand were in silence, faces blushed pink and red. They weren’t keen on staying near the two of you so the kitchen was their safe suit. Daisuke cleared his throat with a tiny cough prompting eyes to look at him.

The silence was hesitantly broken by a loud clap. Anya jumped, calming down once she realized it was Swansea. Swansea clapped four good times, laughing afterwards. Jimmy stared at him out the corner of his eye, he scoffed, “I need more coffee… and a cigarette too.” He grumbled, getting up and leaving to the kitchen with the other two. Swansea still laughing, shrugged it off, “Ah, screw you, you middle aged bastard.”

Daisuke stuttered, “Did we- do something?”

You whispered, “oh my god.” Swansea took that as an invitation, “Explain, did something son?”

Daisuke sheepishly looked at you then at the floor with a shade of red dusting his face, “Not coming to work on time?”

“No! Absolutely not! These metal walls aren’t made of sound canceling materials you sick pieces of shit! You don’t think we could hear you two!? Like rabbits!? Disgusting behavior!” Jimmy yelled. You quietly looked away, holding your head in your hands, embarrassed. Daisuke sighed, “You’re mad I got pussy and you don’t?”

“Daisuke!” Curly gasped, even Anya didn’t expect it, a face of shock and pure horror. Jimmy snapped, running towards the space and yelling, “No one wants to hear that!”

Swansea was having a ball. The best piece of entertainment he’ll ever get in a life time, “Tell me Y/N! Was he a good kisser?”

You covered your neck instinctively, hearing Swansea laugh louder. Daisuke on the other hand was down talking Jimmy for not being like him. He was beaming with joy and owning up to what he did. “You’re mad she loves me!” Daisuke retorted. Then he gave you a smug look, “And this di-“

“DAISUKE!” everyone including you yelled. He threw his hands up with a, “Am I wrong!?”

Fin.

A/N; I enjoyed writing this! Sucky ass Internet I fucking hate it here, but don’t worry, I will be here!

[inkyrainstorms]

The Martian Stan AU - The Apology - Excerpt

Ford was working as he always was nowadays, half listening to the radio behind him and trying to stop his heart from jumping in his throat every time that Stan stopped speaking for more than 10 minutes and nothing but static filled the room again. Ford wasn’t sure what exactly his brother was talking about anymore, as he welded a set of support bolts into place, but he nearly dropped the welding gun on his foot when Stan suddenly spoke after a long stretch of silence.

“Ford?”

Ford fumbled for a moment before shoving a stack of loose paper aside and  setting the welding gun down on the table beside him. He put his hands on either side of the radio on the same cluttered table and took a deep breath to calm his pounding heart.

“Yes, Stanley?” He asked softly.

Stan, of course, didn’t hear him, but had paused as if waiting for a response before continuing anyway.

“I know, I know damn well you’re probably never gonna hear this, but I need to say it anyway before… Well. I don’t need to eat as often and shit and I know you’d love to figure out why but… I’m not sure how long I’m gonna last out here either way.”

Ford didn’t say anything, staring down at the wooden grain of the table like he could burn a hole clean through it with his thoughts alone. His palms ached from where he’d dug in his fingernails, and his shoulders mangled to hunch even further.

Stan laughed. It was a bitter, ugly sound.

“Ah, damnit. This isn’t about me. Can’t even do this right, you idiot” His brother took a deep breath. “ But Ford… I think I need to apologize.”

Some old, fossilized hurt in Ford’s heart snarked ‘you think?’, but Ford nearly gagged as he suffocated the thought before it could take root anew. He felt sick.

Oblivious to Ford’s turmoil —and of course he was, because he didn’t know Ford was right here, that Ford wasn’t going to let one of the last things he ever said to Stan be that he thought Stan was worthless— Stan continued.

“I don’t think I ever got to, back when… you know. What I said that night is a bit of a blur to me to be honest, but I know I was spouting nonsense and saying all the wrong shit and… Moses, Ford. I know it’s too late now but I’m sorry. I really am.”

Something in Ford simultaneously healed and broke in his chest at Stan’s words, but he didn’t get the chance to process it because Stan wasn’t quite done yet.

“And I need you to know it wasn’t on purpose. I’d never do that to you. Never. Why would I ever want to hurt you like that, poindexter? I just… I was scared and I didn’t want to be alone in Glass Shard Beach scraping barnacles off the Taffy shop for the rest of my miserable life and I wasn’t. Thinking.” Stanley’s voice had been rising in a steady crescendo, but suddenly got so quiet that Ford had to strain to catch the words in the buzzing static. “I’d… I shouldn’t have gone into the gym. I shouldn’t have even gone near your friggin project. I didn’t go there to break it, I would never—“ his voice broke. “I thought you knew that. I’m your brother, you dingbat, why would I ever want to hurt you?When did I ever not support you, man?”

“Then why did you do it?” Ford whispered back, just as quiet. That old anger he’d tried to push down rose up again, simmering. Stan knew he’d poured months of his life into the perpetual motion machine, that he’s shed more than a few tears and more than a little blood and sweat over it. And then he’d thrown it all away?

“I’d only hit the table, ya know. Didn’t think the grate’d pop off or anything like that. I tried to fix it. I know I should’ve told you, I know and I’m sorry, just…” I was scared, goes unspoken. Ford’s legs were shaking, and he tried to steadily himself by leaning further on the table. “I know I should’ve told you. I know. I messed up fuckin’ good, Sixer.” Ford flinched.

“I’m. I know you’re never gonna get the apology you deserve cause I was too much of a coward to actually call you and say something.” Stan’s voice was shaking. And I’m sorry for that too. And I’m sorry for not listening to you about your stupid book, and I’m sorry— ugh. We’ll be here all day trying to name my fuckups. That’s the last sorry you’ll ever hear from me you nerdy, uh, nerd.”

Stan sighed loud enough for the radio to crackle and screech. “Good going, Stan,” he muttered, his voice getting quieter as he evidently walked away, done.

And all that was left was static.

Ford pushed himself away from the table and sank into the rolling chair nearby, putting his face in his hands and trying to breathe as the chair was pushed back several feet from his momentum.

“He’s lying,” Ford tried to say, but it tasted like ash in his mouth. “He’s trying to make it so… so.” He faltered. “He’s obviously trying to deceive me.”

Trust no one.

But he had trusted Stan. And Stan got hurled into a Dimension of Nightmares for it.

Stan has no reason to lie, Fords mind whispered, because it was always against him no matter what stance he took. He doesn’t think you’re coming to save him. Why wouldn’t he try to explain the worst mistake of his life in a fit of guilt and complete loss of hope?

“Shut up,” Ford said intelligently, and he didn’t dare pry his face away from his hands, heels of his palms digging into his eye sockets and pushing up his glasses to his hairline

Stan had no reason to lie.

Stan came to help him at the drop of a hat after ten years of being too afraid to even call him. 

Stan… Stan didn’t mean to break his project. It was a stupid accident, done by a stupid teenager too afraid to admit his own failings. Stan didn’t betray Ford. Not like he thought his twin had, for all these years.

Ford was wrong. About everything. He was wrong about Stan and Bill and Fiddleford and, Moses, had he ever done anything right in his entire, miserable life? Ford didn’t know. 

The empty bunk bed beneath his own  for those last few fateful months before Backupsmore, the tears and screaming at a boat that never even left the shore, the years of resentment and refusing to believe he missed his own twin, what was it all for? Because Ford suddenly felt the sharp sting of grief all over again, throbbing with a ferocity he’d refused to acknowledge for the past few weeks. Years. 

It was like he was 17 years old again, mourning for all the wrong reasons and all the right ones too. For his brother. For his chance to become someone worthy of recognition, of love. For pushing away the ones who’d already loved him.

For the first time since the day Stan fell into the portal all those weeks ago, Ford pulled his knees up to his chest on the seat and, in the safety of his own arms, he wept.

The static crackled on, steady and unchanging. Unforgiving.

———————

@aroace-get-out-of-my-face @littlelilliana15 (if anyone else wants to be tagged pls let me know! I’m going to probably be posting more for this au sometime this week)

I have ideas for a mini comic and a whole animatic using Space Oddity so I’ll just have to see how far I get, really