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roxirinart · 2 months ago

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Aventurine... You've Gotta Hand It To Him

An in-depth analysis of Aventurine's hands and why they're critical to his character.

Was asked if I could post this (VERY LONG) analysis I made all about Aventurine's hands - niche, perhaps, but I love him very much and he has a LOT of focus placed on his hands in almost every aspect of his story/design! I think it makes for a really neat insight into his character. Let’s go! 2K words or so so we're under a 'read more', folks :P Hope someone finds it interesting :)

Content warning for (very brief mentions of) sexual theming and violence.

I MIGHT be reaching with some of this but I tried to make sure everything was in order, so if there are any inaccuracies lmk! I'm Always on the lookout for more valuable Avencheem lore 😋

The Avgin - Culture and Symbolism

Kakavasha was born 'blessed' with unnaturally good luck by the Avgin goddess, Gaiathra Triclops, who is often depicted as a left palm with three eyes upon it. If we assume that therefore, someone’s left hand is representative of Gaiathra, then we can draw some interesting conclusions!

When reciting Gaiathra’s prayer, the typical accompanying gesture is for two participants to put their left palms together while saying it, which - by ‘covering’ Gaiathra’s eyes with each other’s palms, they are (as per the words of the prayer) ‘keeping their schemes forever concealed’.

In the version of Aventurine’s boss form that was removed from the Divergent Universe, he has an attack that changes name for each phase of the fight, as follows:

Phase 1: “Eyes Once Closed for Lies”,

Phase 2: “Eyes Twice Closed for Trickery”

Phase 3: “Eyes Thrice Closed for Schemes”.

This suggests that the symbolic act of Gaiathra closing her eyes is blessing the person in question not to have their lies, trickery, or schemes revealed - “I do not perceive it, nor shall anyone else.” This is important to the Avgin, as they seem to have a cultural focus on underhanded methods of achieving their goals, although this was blown greatly out of proportion by prejudice from other Sigonians, and (later) the wider cosmos. The game’s loading screen description of the Avgin is as follows:

“‘Avgin’ means ‘honey’ in the Sigonian language, yet those who irrationally fear Avgins unjustifiably distort the word's meaning to perpetuate Avgin stereotypes that portray them as crafty, smooth-talking, and capricious.”

Sparkle, when talking to Aventurine, also describes the Avgin as “...notorious throughout the entire universe! Liars, thieves, social manipulators, wolves in sheep's clothing... You're really living up to the reputation.”

The Avgin’s reputation as essentially ‘evil’ people, and the clear cultural and religious importance they place upon one’s left hand specifically, can reveal some interesting things about them (and therefore about Kakavasha):

In the real world, the left hand is very commonly considered to be the ‘wrong’ or ‘evil’ hand across many religions and cultures. The word ‘sinister’ (which may be a good descriptor for Aventurine’s behavior, or at least peoples' perception of him given how other characters react to him during the main questline) comes from a Latin word that means ‘on the left side’.

The French word for left, ‘gauche’ was borrowed back into english to mean ‘lacking social grace’ - and with Aventurine’s way of getting all up in peoples’ faces, grandstanding, being provocative, etc., it seems that ‘gauche’ isn’t a bad descriptor for him, either.

In the early 20th century, left-handedness was identified as ‘a biological anomaly, associated with deviancy but something that could be corrected away with behavioral reinforcement’.

Likewise, in the middle ages in England, left-handed people were more likely to be accused of witchcraft and burned at the stake. Sounds familiar when compared to the way Sigonia treated the Avgin - as evildoers, tricksters, backstabbers, etc.,

If the Avgin were so ‘left-handed’ in all senses of the phrase, then… perhaps the ‘behavioral correction’ they received could be justified...?

It is reinforced several times throughout both written lore and during gameplay that the Avgin’s beautiful appearances and high emotional intelligence were a source of jealousy to other clans and races, hence the perpetuation of the Avgin’s negative reputation - one that Aventurine ends up playing into, often intentionally.

Why bother trying to change the stereotype if he can use it to his advantage? Besides, it’s not like getting rid of the Avgins’ negative rep will help them now, anyway.

All this is to say that the concept of hiding your true intentions with your left hand - ‘keeping your cards close to your chest’, ‘bluffing’, ‘having an ace up your sleeve’, knowing when to ‘show your hand’ - is a huge overarching theme for the Avgin, and therefore for Aventurine.

Notice that a LOT of sayings to do with hiding things from others or manipulating people’s impressions of you and what they think you might do come from poker or other card games! I can’t think of any universe where the devs did that by accident. Nice work, devs!

The Left Hand

‘Sleight of hand’ is the name of Aventurine’s game, and he sure knows how to play it. ‘Sleight’ means “the use of dexterity or cunning, especially so as to deceive”, so naturally the suffix ‘- of hand’ brings Aventurine’s hands to the forefront as one of his main tools of the trade!

However, the devs once again outdid themselves - each of Aventurine’s hands is representative of parts of his character in very different ways.

Everything about Aventurine is designed to cleverly divert attention away from his real thoughts and feelings.

I’ll get the obvious out of the way: Aventurine’s left hand (as previously discussed) is critically important to his character. It represents so many things for him both visually and otherwise.

If you’re a regular Aventurine enjoyer it’s likely you know about his habit of hiding his left hand behind his back when he’s nervous or making a big (or life-threatening) gamble - but why?

He’s specifically hiding Gaiathra’s hand. I don’t think it’s a coincidence; Aventurine - by hiding away what is essentially a physical representation of his goddess - is ‘closing her eyes’, so he cannot be seen through (even if it’s purely subconscious).

He wants people locked onto his gaze and away from the hand he’s clutching Gaiathra’s ‘blessing’ of good luck so tightly with. (Note: the ironic nature of Aventurine’s relationship with his cursed blessing isn’t lost on me, but that’s another day’s essay. :))

This habit of hiding his left hand behind his back is (once you’re looking for it) very common in the majority of his animations, art, cinematics, and other various media, like in his character trailer when he’s about to reveal the result of his big dice roll; in a specific animation during his bossfight, where he’s actively banking on losing so he can carry out his ‘grand death’ (‘clutching his chips for dear life’, as his future self put it…); the idle animation where he’s fidgeting with one of his poker chips; or in the ‘Final Victor’ light cone, where he is playing russian roulette with his own life just to prove a point to Dr. Ratio (which was a little excessive, perhaps…).

Usually, having a hand behind your back is considered to be suspicious: you’re hiding something, perhaps a weapon.

And for Kakavasha, out of fear and knowing it’ll give him the upper hand, he hides his own weapon behind his back: the physical representation of all his schemes, strategies, lies, trickery, and tactics - and the last Avgin palm to touch another’s.

Perhaps in relation to his particularly strong connection with Gaiathra, Aventurine is also left-handed! Evidence? Sure!

As a general ��fashion rule’ (and for practicality), wristwatches are worn on the non-dominant hand, and someone as fashion-conscious as Aventurine would very likely be aware of this. His watch is on his right wrist.

Additionally, he wears no rings on his left hand because writing or similar activities would be a pain to do with that much jewelry on. Further evidence can be found in this phone wallpaper of him released by Hoyoverse: he’s holding his phone with his left hand, and people usually operate their phones with their dominant hand. Similarly, in one of the many videos on the Hoyoverse YouTube channel (I’m sorry I don’t know which one it’s from), he goes to grab his tablet off the bedside table with his left hand, too.

The Right Hand

Aventurine’s character is, at its core, is all about defense. Protecting himself from harm, shielding his thoughts and feelings from others, creating an impenetrable barrier of flashy clothing and fake smiles to conceal his true self - this all presents in his moveset in battle, too.

He’s a preservation-class, shield-providing character. The critical thing to note is this: his defense all happens on the right hand. This includes his skill (throwing out chips with his right hand to shield his teammates), and his technique, which generates an additional shield for the team before the start of battle.

His right hand ‘shields’ him both literally and metaphorically in this sense. He wears all his rings on his right hand, because that’s the hand he wants you to focus on, the pretty, sparkly one with all the flashy jewelry and expensive wristwatch, the one that’s extended for you to shake (he shakes with his right hand), the only part of him most people get to touch. A part of the body furthest away from his heart, dazzling and defensive.

The outermost, superficial layer.

It’s the hand that more often performs captivating little coin tricks out in the open to catch people’s attention, keeping them focused on something that’s within his control, because so much of his life isn't.

On The Attack

Here’s the kicker though - this makes his left hand the attacking hand. When push comes to shove (or when he feels he needs to strike first), Aventurine lashes out with Gaiathra’s hand.

As mentioned before, his weapons are his schemes, his secrets, his tricks, his lies - and the hand holding all those chips so tightly is his left, the lucky hand, the one that has brought him success and saved his life time and time again.

Ultimately, it all comes down to relying on his raw luck to push him through (whether he's happy about that or not) when all his other methods of attack have been stripped away - and his hand trembles, because having to make a blind bet that his goddess (who did nothing to stop his family being massacred, yet is both cruel and benevolent enough to keep him alive) will save him yet again must be really fucking terrifying.

When Your Hands Are Tied...

Looking at both hands together, a design choice which I believe to be deliberate is the way he has bracelets of some variety over both his wrists. It’s a subtle imitation of manacles; he may have escaped his iron ones, but Aventurine now lives in golden handcuffs instead, bound by social shackles instead of physical ones.

He’s still a slave - just not in the traditional sense.

To my understanding (someone please correct me if I'm wrong, his timeline has some annoying gaps in it even though I tried very hard to figure it out ;-;), technically Aventurine legally belongs to the IPC.

He killed his most recent owner and so escaped his that particular ownership, sure, but when he barters with Jade, he asks her to pay him the ‘remainder of his market value’, which insinuates that it would therefore give him ownership of himself.

However, Jade doesn’t simply hand over the money: she pulls him into a job contract - a new form of imprisonment - without ever giving him real legal autonomy, never officially declaring him a free man. His hands are invisibly tied - bound by corporate and social 'manacles' to his job.

"Out, Damned Spot!"

Speaking of manacles, let’s talk about the ‘Hunger Games’, shall we?

Kakavasha is, at some indeterminate point, entered into a spectator sport where he is forced to fight thirty-four other slaves to the death.

It is mentioned that he has no other weapon than the bindings on his wrists and the chain between them - and he emerges ‘victorious’ (physically the victor... perhaps not mentally or emotionally, though).

In the quest notes during Aventurine’s (literal) trip through the maze while he’s making his way to the stage for his grand finale, he describes himself with the word ‘murderer’, showing that he’s clearly distraught by what happened and resents himself for it.

Following on from this, a possible interpretation of the design choice to have Aventurine wear gloves is for him to (figuratively) hide the blood on his hands.

Aventurine’s gloves simultaneously create a literal barrier between himself and the world, and work as another piece of fancy clothing to add to his impenetrable, sparking defense. The closest match I could find to the style of Aventurine’s gloves are short dress gloves or wrist gloves, which are specifically fashion items as opposed to practical ones.

(As a cheeky little aside, the absolute closest style match I could find for his gloves are latex or leather womens’ gloves most commonly used in BDSM, which is fun! Maybe I’m reaching, but I like to think it’s a subtle way of making him more effeminate - and in Aventurine’s case, therefore a subtle call to his sexuality imo - and also another little detail to help push his ‘provocative’ appearance and demeanor.)

Conclusion

Our hands are how we interact with the world. In Aventurine’s case, they’re how he keeps the world pushed as far away from himself as possible, all the while gripping onto his ‘good luck’ for dear life.

Aventurine’s hands are his weapons, his shield, his faith, his fear, and his guilt, decorated with jeweled rings and bound in golden handcuffs.

Ultimately, when Aventurine offers to lend a hand to the Trailblazer, when he shows Sunday his hand (and a bit more besides) during their meeting, and when he forces Acheron’s hand during his bossfight, it's so that his own hands are free to do whatever he needs to orchestrate his greatest scheme yet...

...for better or worse.

#I would apologise for this being so long #but im not going to :) I put a lot of effort in hahah #wont apologise for all the 'hand' puns either #roxirinhsr #hsr #aventurine #aventurine hsr #aventurine character analysis #character analysis #honkai star rail #aventurine honkai star rail #honkai star rail aventurine #hsr aventurine #LONG POST #roxirinother

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pityroadart · 2 years ago

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Hey, what is your process when making collages? How do you collect things for them, how do you decide on quotes and what to draw/paint on and such? I really enjoy them :)

Hello! That's a very good question, I do it so automatically that I'm not entirely sure myself — but since I caught myself in the middle of a cut-and-stick sketchbook session, let's dive into it.

First up, I collect scraps like a trash magpie. Always have done, always will. Any paper items that I enjoy the colour/shape/texture of. Nowadays I tend to enjoy things with bold primary colours or black and white, pages from old maths textbooks or encyclopedias, flyers from local exhibitions, fragile tape and shipping labels from parcels, scraps found on the floor, old shopping lists, slips of paper from inside medicine packets or covid tests etc, anything that jumps out at me.

I collect these things in the pocket at the back of my sketchbook, or in a drawer (I have a whole drawer dedicated to scraps — some picked up from six or seven years ago, and some from last week). I hoard them like some sort of paper-loving dragon.

Other things I like adding are washi tapes, stickers, cinema tickets, drawings (whether straight in the sketchbook or stuck in), and anything else flat enough to fit in there.

Here are a few older sketchbook pages (from about 2014) showing some other types of scraps I've collated and used, and I think you can see where my current style has grown from.

The second part of your question is: but how do I put them all together? Again it's pretty much instinctive by now, but here are a few things I look for:

- Do I have a theme for the page? Is there a central object I want to build around? For the recent star trek pages I shared here, I'd been to see TMP and TWOK at the cinema and glued my tickets into my sketchbook, so I knew I wanted to theme the page around them

- Is there a colour palette? Either I pick colours from my central object, or I decide on a colour palette myself. Nowadays I keep my colour palettes very limited - one or two bolder colours and a range of cream/white/black/grey - but previously I've set the palette as pastel rainbow colours for example, when those were the colours I was more drawn to

- What words, symbols or drawings do I want to add? This can be lyrics that have been stuck in my head or that fit the theme, phrases I've come up with, fragments of found poetry clipped from textbooks, drawings that fit the theme (e.g star trek screencap thumbnails in the first example), etc. They don't have to fit the theme perfectly, or make sense to an external viewer - the important thing is that *you* want them on your page

This image below is a fragment of an as-yet-incomplete page - in which I swatched some leftover watercolour paint onto the page, found it complimented the colour of a sticker from a parcel perfectly (the small circular sticker), then I added an interesting-looking image from an old encyclopedia, which reminded me of a line from a Mountain Goats song: "the low pressure system brings the breezes in", and I wrote out another line from that same song on kraft paper and stuck it in. So it makes sense to me, or maybe someone familiar with the song, but to the average viewer it just looks kinda cool and/or they enjoy the line I've written out.

Then the next thing is to stick everything together! I'll confess, I rarely do this in one sitting - I currently have multiple pages I'm working on, one started the other month and almost complete, one started two weeks ago, and one just started today. I add to it whenever I get an idea or find a scrap that fits. But I used to do the pages in one sitting, and that absolutely works too.

As to how I decide what goes where on the page, that's just intuitive! I've made collage-y type art for at least fifteen years now (and longer if you count playing 'cut and stick' with old magazines as a kid), and I've very much learnt what sort of compositions please me, and how to tell if something feels too cluttered or lopsided or too spacious. But the beauty of this part is it's all personal preference! Shuffle your scraps around before gluing them down, and see what works for you.

Sometimes I add text or drawings first and use scraps in between, sometimes I stick the scraps down first and fill the gaps with text or drawings - there's no one way to do it! And hey, if there's something you don't like, you can always tear it out or stick something over it, that's the joy of mixed media.

Anyway this was a bit long-winded but I hope it makes at least a little bit of sense. Go forth and play with scraps!

#ask #art tips #mixed media #collage #sketchbook #faq

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just-a-carrot · 1 year ago

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Oh jeez sorry to bother you again so soon but Is there a meaning or symbolism behind each character's theme color? Or was it just because colors are cool? Idk I enjoy dissecting your brain like a frog I look up to you and your writing a lot arghgreugrhuohggrpjrp /pos

a big part of the reason i originally gave them colors at all was because of the way i wrote and designed the narration/dialogue in game. because i mixed narration together with dialogue in the same text boxes, i couldn't use the standard name box style used in a lot of VNs to differentiate who was talking. and even though it's often clear who is talking both from the surrounding narration and context clues, when i first started coding it i noticed there are a few times for instance where there's a short line of dialogue all by itself that would be really hard to figure out who's saying it without a bit more info. so i came up with the idea to put all their individual dialogue in a different color so it was always really clear who was speaking (i also enjoyed how it set apart the dialogue a bit in general)

as for why i chose each color for each character... tbh it was mostly just vibes and me thinking about a color that felt like it fit each of them LDKFAJD there weren't any super specific decisions or thoughts behind them besides that?? you can probably tell at least how some of them were inspired, like orlam's hair inspiring the orange and iggy's outfit inspiring the blue. but besides that there isn't any more hidden meaning. now however i can't even separate them from their colors anymore they've become so much a part of them and ingrained in my mind!! 🤣💦 i really love how each of them has a color and i can easily use those colors whenever i talk about them or draw them, etc.

AND THANK YOU????? DLKAFJDSF 💕

#ow: asks

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welcome-to-the-shit-library · 1 year ago

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tell me about your dnd character 👀👀👀

!!!! ok so I could make like a whole big long essay abt EVERYTHING about her but I wont so im just gonna pick One Topic for now

I LOVE designing characters and Thea specifically was. just so fun. shes green themed and that made the eye colour pretty easy, and the people from where she's from tend towards red hair, so that part was out of the way. now we get to the fun part !

Thea's design relies a lot on asymmetry, a good amount of her design tends towards her right. (hair pulled over the right shoulder, longer sleeves, etc etc). its in universe an attempt to cover all the burns, but in overcompensating it ends up drawing more attention to that side anyway . fun little bit of character in there.

shes got a lot of flowy elements, most prominently Long Coat, mainly just to keep some of the Spellcaster Intrigue in there, but I tried to keep a good amount of diamond/triangle shapes to lend itself to the movement aspect, and the like. sharp. vibe.

of course I could go into detail abt like certain accessories, but I tried my best to not put TOO MUCH unnecessary outfit details ( a la Genshin Impact) because as fun as those character designs are they dont really . work as well for a setting like dungeons and dragons. there are a few most important elements, like the daggers ands spell elements on her belt. and the Always necessary "Character with Big Symbolic Injury has Bandages covering the Scars" (that was probably the most self-indulgent part of her design lmao. I just think its cool)

Im NOT an expert on character design AT ALL. most of what I do is pretty guesswork heavy, but I was trying to balance character/backstory details with the desired "the team's calculating but quick-tempered magic user" vibe. is quick-tempered and calculating contradictory? im sure she pulls it off somehow.

#GOD. I love her sm #shes like. the genre of character thats 'so cool and badass until you put her in a situation thats NOT a fight'#thea when she takes down the bad guy but now she has to Talk To People #shes so poorly adjusted. I love her #anyway #this was long I got carried away #ask #thea tag #dnd #thea + chuuya “short ginger with anger problems solidarity”

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bloodpen-to-paper · 1 year ago

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Review Blurbs: The Sea Beast

General:

-This movie is a huge love letter to pirates. They made a point to use accurate accents from pirates in that time period and region, even making a dig at the inaccurate depiction of pirates saying "argh" that is popularly known

-On that note, it has a huge core theme of being critical of history, and the idea that "history is written by the winners". As a history buff I am begging you to get more into this topic, you have no idea how bad the inaccurate depictions of history go (some people still believe in the Thanksgiving story...)

-Sarah Sharpe is the best character I take no criticisms (and I lived for every time Ms. Merino's job was to just shout at people, I support her with my life)

-Minor detail but I noticed that the town is a matriarchy; the Queen seems to call the shots more often with her "King" either having equal power to her (and not more than her) or being a prince consort under her power. The "King" talks almost like a consort with giving debriefings and run downs of known information while she handles the real conversations and decrees, which is a cool detail to put for the world-building

-The movie's generally very racially diverse and has lots of diverse women (I'm talking in body type, facial animation, personality, occupation, etc.) in the pirate world and among the townspeople. Even the monarchy general was a woman, which makes sense when you consider the kingdom is actually a queendom

-There's seemingly no racism or sexism in this setting, but I feel the implication is there; Captain Crow has women and POC everywhere in his crew but he himself as a white man made Jacob, another white man, his heir without having to think too hard (many times these "draws" people have to those of their own archetype are subconscious). He also doesn't listen to Sarah much of the time (this is during his grieving process which could be chalked up to that but he also shows a distinct interest in what Jacob has to say more than anyone), and refused to listen to Maise about cutting the rope, even almost killed her for going against his orders. The monarchs are also white, which felt intentional (diverse society's can still be privy to racial bias, which you will see when you look at the demographics of the working class vs. the elite, in this case pirate society vs. the monarchy)

-Maise mentions when she's telling Jacob about how wrong their history is, and that the beasts attacked human ships after humans attacked them and encroached on their territory. Humans have done this to animals since we were first able, and the movie takes a strong stance towards wildlife preservation in the form of telling people we need to leave the wildlife alone, which I immensely appreciate and you should too

-The symbolism of Sarah Sharpe giving Maise the knife that started the whole journey. She first gave it to Maise as a precaution ('you're on a pirate ship, you need to be prepared' kinda deal) and Maise used it to cut the ropes that got her and Jacob flung off the ship and eaten by Red. This paralleled so nicely during the final act with Sarah telling Maise “I should’ve given you a bigger knife” and siding with Maise in cutting the rope and freeing Red. Its a subtle but very beautiful detail of a black woman supporting a black girl, particularly in breaking the rules made by a white man, stating her only regret was not encouraging her to have greater ambitions (the “bigger sword”), and eventually helping the girl on her path to achieving them

Criticisms:

-Since its the core theme, it felt kind of glaring to me that the movie doesn't quite treat animals like animals. Red is made to be “friendly” and hyper-sentient in understanding humans, which is not accurate to real animals. The reason I harp on this is because people have a harmful habit of trying to humanize animals in order to give them value (i.e. "we shouldn't hurt the environment because animals are cute"). Its a good standpoint for getting people to sympathize away from extremist beliefs (Manifest Destiny/"animals are inferior so humans can do whatever we want to them" type ideology), but at this point I think we're ready for broader conversations about being actually accurate in our perception of wildlife, in that they are nothing like humans and don't need to be to deserve to be left the hell alone. They exist, and we should respect that.

-I honestly would've removed Blue, the movie felt harder to take seriously with this character that's very much meant to be the "fun and lovable companion that the kids will like and maybe even buy merchandise for" insertion. Not accusing anyone of that last bit, but my point stands; you don't need to have "that" character for a kid's movie to be enjoyable to kids, and this movie is already more mature than most kid's movies so I would've removed them

Final Thoughts:

The Sea Beast is a very cute movie that's a love letter to pirates and history, and especially now in this era of critical analysis, its more important than ever to not only know our history, but to make sure our history is accurate. Definitely watch this movie if you love history, pirates, pirate history, or just cute stories about people finding their own unconventional families within each other (and some animals).

#review blurbs #the sea beast

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keikakudom · 7 months ago

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This design is not 100%, as it doesn't have his new hands/exterior anatomy added yet but.

Here are some thoughts I have about RR!AU Vox's design:

Main stuff: - First off, his bowtie: personally. I found this a massive honor that I've deemed Vox to be the one to keep the bowtie in RR!AU because i'm on a mission to GET RID OF ALL OF THEM/change them into different types of "bows" or collar accessories. There's literally so many different types that exist, i'm mad that literally 7 characters in HH have a bowtie....The bowtie also has a snake eye pattern in the middle, taken straight from Lucifer's demonic form. (I love Vox with a tie so much. I think Canon vox should wear a tie. But for the purposes of RR!AU where his fakeness/showmanship is at the forefront, I thought the bowtie made more sense) - His fuckass hat and the silly wi-fi signal symbols: It's corny AF. RR!AU Vox is corny. I guess I altered Vox's personality to be more in line with what I see his canon design as. - Swaping red with yellow: Wanted to distance him design-wise from Alastor as far as possible. Alastor did not pay rent, and was evicted from RR!Vox's mind. This is also because of the vague "royalty" themes I'm going with since he's contracted to Lucifer and contract sharers/holders usually get a bit of influence from their designs overtime, I like to think.

The other stuff: - His "contract" eye: I actually don't know if i've mentioned it here, but I liked the popular theory that people who have their souls owned have black scelera/eyes(ex: Angel, Husk, Vox's Assistant, Travis, Melissa, etc.). Vox is a special case in which he can use his display to hide it. He only "puts it down" to those he's closest with(so just the Vees, really) but I imagine he's still insecure about it.... - His white coat: I noted in the Alastor design breakdown post that I wanted him to have this "nice guy facade(coat) and darker/evil true intentions(his suit)". But also a big inspo I thought about when designing Vox was that I wanted him to look like those retro 50's prom outfits. I don't really know why, but that's a reason why his coat is almost a pure white. The black lines on his bowtie are there for a similar reason, i wanted that retro-ish old school charm. - His suit: Not much really. I do like his canon vest but also I needed it to make sense for my sanity(was it a suit vest? Was it a sweater? The world may never know). - Circut lines: just me wanting to keep the cool arm lines in his canon design and then deciding to put it everywhere for his "brand"/The Reset Resort. I think it makes sense since he's trying to be more "orderly"? Appeasing? Something like that. - Antenna(on top of his head): Vaguely resembles a halo. The 3 spokes on the left were supposed to be closer to actual TV antenna, but you can sometimes draw them as stars/long sparkles for that ✨️halo✨️ look, i guess. - Headset: wanted something cool to make him less bald + continue with the thin gold/curly themes somewhere. It was actually trying to resemble a snake/snake eye at some point but I dont think it looks like that at all so. It is what it is.

Parting thoughts:

- Generally, he's supposed to look very "Art Deco" with some futuristic/sci-fi elements.

- Ive thought about redesigning parts where he aligns with canon a lot(Hat, Wi-fi signals, Collar/Bowtie) to make it a more original design..... but ultimately, this is a canon-adjacent AU and Vox is the main character(Charlie should be too but LOOK AT MY BLOG. It's vox, everything is vox). It is of the highest honor that he mirrors his canon self in a far-off way.

Full design notes

(and I'm contemplating on turning the RR!AU into a fic....Instead of continuing with comics I already have planned

+ Pros: I can work on it anywhere

Cons: I must write on a regular basis)

#au: reset resort #Vox #Text post #Notes i suppose #Feel free to ask about anything

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getawaycamel · 8 months ago

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DREAMS ARE CALLING ME

(ITALIAN BELOW)

Welcome to Getaway Camel!

A blog that puts together my two greatest passions: writing and traveling, vital needs for me as much as breathing.

Here you can read descriptions of landscapes carved into my memory that I’ve been trying to draw with words throughout my life —whether gazing out of a car window or at the boundless sky.

Maybe I’ll tell less practical information than classic travel blogs do, but I hope equally persuasive to convince you to visit those places.

This is my shelter where I recount my journeys, explore and unveil my purest feelings, express my view on social themes, share my hobbies (fashion, art, cinema, history, etc.). I hope it will be a safe space for you too!

I’ve kept this project in the drawer for so many years, covered in dust by now. Now that it has finally seen the light, I can’t hide my excitement while writing the very first post!

Getaway Camel is a playful combination of “getaway car” and “camel”. Getaway Car is a song from Reputation, my favorite album by Taylor Swift, my idol for 10 years; camel alludes to my love for Arab culture, as I’ve studied Arabic and hope to visit more Arab or generally Eastern countries in the future (my dream trip would be to Thailand, don’t ask me why).

In addition, a “getaway camel” embodies the desire to escape reality which I often experience.

What better way to launch the blog than by sharing photos from my visit to the Museum of Dreamers (Prati district, Rome) in early March —obviously theme dressed.

You’ll dive into a world halfway between Wonderland and Barbie’s house, and you’ll step into each room with an increasingly enchanted gaze. More than a museum, it’s the house of dreamers: a perfect place to feel like Alice for one day… and also for all adults who want to become shamelessly children again :)

As a quote on a museum wall says, dreams are calling you: my dreams have been calling me for a long time, and now I’m finally ready to answer their call!

About me: My name is Sabrina, I’m 23 and I’m studying international relations at university, but you can also call me by my nickname ‘sagitta’ :) Besides being the symbol of my beloved zodiac sign, it means ‘arrow’ in Latin and that’s what I wish to be for someone with my words, an arrow that leaves a deep mark.

ITALIANO

Benvenuti su Getaway Camel!

Un blog che unisce le mie due più grandi passioni: scrivere e viaggiare, esigenze vitali per me al pari di respirare.

Qui potete leggere le descrizioni dei paesaggi rimasti scolpiti nella mia memoria che da tutta la vita cerco di disegnare con le parole, davanti al finestrino della macchina o al cielo sconfinato.

Forse vi darò informazioni meno utili rispetto ai classici blog di viaggi, ma spero altrettanto suggestive da convincervi a visitare quei luoghi.

Questo è il mio rifugio in cui racconto i miei viaggi, ma esploro anche le mie emozioni e le metto a nudo, esprimo la mia opinione su temi attuali, condivido i miei interessi (moda, arte, cinema, storia ecc.). Spero che sia un posto sicuro anche per voi!

Tenevo questo progetto nel cassetto da tanti anni, ormai era ricoperto di polvere e ora che ha visto finalmente la luce, non nascondo la mia emozione nello scrivere questo primo post!

Getaway Camel nasce dalla combinazione di “getaway car” e “camel”. Getaway Car è una canzone di Reputation, il mio album preferito di Taylor Swift, la mia idola da 10 anni; camel è un riferimento al mio amore per la cultura araba, dato che ho studiato arabo e spero di visitare più Paesi arabi in futuro o in generale orientali (il mio viaggio ideale sarebbe in Thailandia, non chiedetemi perché).

E poi, un “cammello per la fuga” rappresenta perfettamente il desiderio di evadere dalla realtà che sperimento spesso.

Quale modo migliore per inaugurare il blog se non condividendo le foto di quando ho visitato a inizio Marzo – vestita a tema ovviamente – il Museum of Dreamers (in zona Prati a Roma).

Venite catapultati in un mondo a metà tra il Paese della Meraviglie e la casa di Barbie, vi addentrate con uno sguardo incantato in una stanza dopo l’altra. Più che un museo è la casa dei sognatori, il posto perfetto per sentirvi Alice per un giorno… e anche per tutti gli adulti che vogliono tornare bambini senza vergogna :)

Come dice una scritta all’interno del museo, dreams are calling you: i miei sogni mi stanno chiamando da tempo, ma sono finalmente pronta a rispondere alla chiamata!

Qualcosa su di me. Mi chiamo Sabrina, ho 23 anni e sto studiando relazioni internazionali all’università, ma potete chiamarmi anche col mio nickname ‘sagitta’ :) Oltre a essere il simbolo del mio segno zodiacale, significa ‘freccia’ in latino ed è quello che spero di essere per qualcuno con le mie parole, una freccia che lascia un segno profondo.

#featured #long post #getawaycamel #mymemorylane #travel #about

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goalofthecentury · 2 years ago

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directors notebook on these because i promised one in the tags of the original post and never did one lol my bad. anyway

ok so to be honest i don’t know where these came from. like i knew i wanted to create something for creations sake and tbh i originally had a few sketches of alamein that i was gonna put in front of some slightly surreal backgrounds but idk. i felt like i could twist it further than that. like my first idea was a sketch-turned-portrait of alamein on the phone drawn against & incorporated into a background that made him look as if he was underwater (which is where the first one came from), but it ended up not really making sense in my head? i still like the idea & might end up using it one day but it wasnt what i wanted

anyway. on to the actual DRAWINGS. they’re both essentially a more surreal way of presenting boy’s ideas about alamein - he’s a deep sea treasure diver as seen from the depths and lit by a sun even further away than usual, and he’s the captain of the rugby team winning trophies and accepting regional honours on tv. i wanted to create a sense of surrealism, more specifically a sense of childlike wonder & nostalgic haze; they’re not just what boy wants to imagine, they’re the pictures he sees when his mind wanders, the way his brain has collaged so many aspects of what he knows (and doesnt know) about alamein with things from the rest of his life. of course, it has to be said that in the film boy’s initial ideas of alamein (outlandish) are contrasted with how theyre presented during that opening monologue (normal), but we can imagine the reverse (in which boy’s fantasies get more and more down to earth as his perception of alamein changes, until they’re barely even fantasies at all). this might be crossing into the ‘classic nz cinema’ territory that taika has talked about avoiding & might not make much narrative sense but hey. it doesnt have to ! it’s my art and i make the rules

something both drawings have in common (something that is more subtle in the second than the first) is the incorporation of physical, real world ‘illustration’ into the background - the kitchen mural in the first one and the map of northern egypt imposed onto the wall in the second one. the kitchen mural in the first one a) acts as a space filler, b) switches out underwater sea flora & fauna for those we would find above ground, and c) serves to ground a somewhat grandiose image in a setting that is entirely familiar to boy. regardless of who drew the mural i wanted to create a sense that boy is imagining alamein in this crazy situation and is still linking him back to their home. similarly with the map in the second one - it’s much more subtle but for boy it acts as a physical link between the alamein he knows (and with whom he shares a name), and the alamein he imagines (a man he watches on tv, who wins trophies and acclaim). because ultimately i wanted the surrealism to be tied completely to the place boy considers to be home to both him and alamein ("hey dad! welcome back!").

both of them reference colour theory in one way or another; admittedly less so than they once did (the first one was once upon a time lit entirely in red from below) because balancing meta and nice looking colour palettes is harder than it sounds, but it’s still there. the sea in the first drawing is far more green than perhaps it should be, but there’s still a decent amount of blue (mostly where the mural intersects with the background - the hope is tied to how boy incorporates his idea of home into the image). there is still red coming in at the bottom, there’s not much i can say here other than the fact that grief underpins the whole narrative and every relationship therein so you know. you do the maths lol. in the second one, alamein wears a blue & yellow rugby jersey. theres two reasons for this - firstly, it’s boy’s idea of hope winding its way through the narrative, and secondly (in an incredibly serendipitous turn of events), that’s the kit of the bay of plenty rugby union. sometimes things just work out i guess. it also works because i wanted it to be regional rather than local or national because that’s what i imagine boy means by the rugby team - a big enough honour that it still qualifies as projection but not too big that it takes alamein out of boy’s life in a tangible way. alamein in the all blacks doesnt make sense because boy still wants him to be tied to his concept of home. & of course not forgetting the red light to the right of the screen. there is grief in everything

speaking purely visually, they both have a haze to them, especially the second one. its the tv we see in their living room, because i wanted to place the image specifically within that context but with the feeling of being seen in a dream or through several layers of cellophane. it’s blurred around the edges, the colours separate from each other, it fades red into blue and back again; alamein is crystal clear but everything around him bleeds into everything else. boy is taking this made up image, putting it on tv, and putting the tv back in their living room. in essence it’s being filtered through at least three layers of memory and wishful thinking and hope, and then sold to us as the real deal. which to be honest sums up the whole film pretty well.

again visually, there’s a definite contrast between the drawings in terms of point of view. as i said before the second one is placed within their living room and is therefore from the perspective of someone in their house - par contre the first one is completely removed from that sort of context and actually exaggerates the surrealism in how we see alamein from below as if (story in a story moment) he’s in a blockbuster of his own. but it’s this difference that unites them; each pov is equally unlikely in their respective context and serves to round off each visual by placing it distinctly out of reach when contrasted with its relatively simple context [boy’s opening monologue - a child’s description of his life].

anywayyy pour conclure. i love this film so much oh my god i love narratives and peaceful conflict and grief and creation of identity and projection of identity and ‘never meet your heroes’ and ‘i met my hero and it went so wrong’ and and and. i love you red and green and blue and i love you unreliable narration. and i love putting all of that in a completely different context to what it was originally born into. i hope this all made sense & i hope it gives both of these drawings more context because i had a lot of fun putting all of this in there! and i hope you can all forgive the copious anachronisms in the second one lol

#i think. i THINK thats everything but if i forgot anything ill add it in later !!#like i love symbolism and themes etc and i put so much in those drawings. also i think its fun to see the behind the scenes sometimes

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distort-opia · 2 years ago

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obviously Catwoman was written to be Batman's love interest, but King portrays her as only that imo. i barely see her being a full fledged character rather than King's viewing of her. i am aware of the writer the whole damn time. actually enjoying Zdarsky's interpretation with the Penguin storyline. she feels like a character rather than a shell of one. ( and not like a writer's own fantasy 😀)

however many fans adore King's run, i will reread it one day and hopefully see what others do.

She is sort of written to be a love interest by King, but the thing is, everyone in King's stories serves a purpose, is meant to carry a message about Batman. So I can't fully take issue with the fact this is her role in the story, because this is simply the way King uses characters. Bane is a twisted mirror of Bruce's self-destructiveness, Gotham Girl is his doomed sense of hope, etc. etc.

Batman is the narrative, and everyone in it is meant to say something about him; and what Selina is meant to represent, in King's stories, is Bruce's complicated yearning for normality. He wants to love her, he wants to have children and a family and a form of peace, and Selina is... the closest path to that he can imagine, even though she's definitely much more than his idea of her. And this King abundantly attempts to make clear. That Bruce is trying to turn her into something else in order to serve his own needs, and that Selina simply isn't what he projects on her, and that she struggles a lot with not letting Bruce take control.

But yeah, the problem in general with having a character embody a theme or a concept this way, is that they're indeed not fleshed out or have a personality of their own. You'll inevitably only hear the writer. It's what I talked about in the previous ask regarding King's writing, and indeed, Zdarsky doesn't seem to have this problem. Although who knows... maybe upon a re-read you'll also fall into the trap that is trying to make sense of all the threads and symbolism King packs his stories with :)) For me at least, that's the biggest draw; trying to understand and making all the connections. Leaving aside his objective flaws in writing, King's stories at least allow you to go insane with analyzing them because there's stuff to analyze. There's meat on those bones. Not a lot of writing these days has that degree of depth or... effort put into it. Flaws aside, the man does care and does love the character of Batman; he might be a bit confused, but he got the spirit, as the kids say.

#asks #selina kyle #king's writing

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animisticpagan · 1 year ago

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Of course!

And I was thinking about some of the questions you asked... I think connection to the device itself has an impact, 100%. Its the same way that physical things behave when you have a connection to them. Kinda like how drinks or food taste better when they are in a cup, bowl, mug, etc. that you have a love for, or are special to you! Connection to the app might be more like a connection to a specific tarot deck. A certain deck might be best for talking to a certain entity, or have a better connection between you and the universe, and that could totally be the same with certain apps or certain decks in certain apps. All those things could make it so, if you used the same app on your partner's phone, the results change- maybe even drastically! I think that even if you have the same app on different devices, the spirit of each device is different, which influences the apps on it. Same reason why, for me at least, using tumblr on my phone compared to my ipad or my computer gives different vibes and energies off. Its the device, even if the underlying feeling of the app is the same!

Your other questions are pretty valid also. The care put into both the consumer and the producer for the app are important. When I use Labyrinthos, if I dont focus all the energy from the question I need answered when the cards are shuffling, and focus on that question and try to not let my mind wander (thanks ADHD lol), then my draw is pretty weird, or just entirely inaccurate. For daily draws, relaxing into myself and my day, and whatever emotions are over me, results the most accurate responses. I tried to get a lot of different apps when I first started to do digital divination, and a lot of them weren't it. The composition of how the app is made, how it fits with the user, and the care from both sides can really impact a read in my opinion. Its the same with physical tarot cards- if they are made poorly, without 'good' intent (however you want to define 'good'), or the tarot deck user is uncaring of the cards, it can absolutely affect it. It also reminds me of people who would do silly random draws because they werent caring, and the cards would either be confusing and random (as if the cards were confused on what the reader wanted or was doing), or they would be absolutely blunt and brutal (as if the cards were upset they werent taking it seriously/wasting their time/or doubting the cards themselves).

Im not sure about some of the others, but I think some deities absolutely communicate better through different divination mediums than others. My Goddess Artemis seems to communicate the best through my pendulum and smaller draws (like the daily spreads) of my online tarot, while my Gods Phonoi aren't really satisfied with any divination methods I have. Its kind of like how certain deities communicate better through decks that fit their aesthetics, or are made for them. If I got Artemis a red and silver/gold deer themed deck, she would probably communicate the best through it, considering it is for her with her symbolisms. And the Phonoi have seemed to like the Hannibal themed tarot I am making, so that will probably be for them lol. Some entities might find it easier to influence technology, while others might find it easier to influence physical cards or other physical things. Its more trial and error to see what they prefer, especially if their preferences change depending on which person they are hovering around!

Such delicious food for thought... I love this kind of questionings! Also reminds me to work on my Hannibal deck... but! I hope this helps! I am very animistic, and I've kinda realized my Goddess has been following me around my entire life, so that might also be why she just uses everything to talk with me? Connections to whatever entities someone is communicating with can absolutely change the answers of some things as well. I found that communicating with Artemis is much easier than with the Phonoi, because I just recently started communicating and working with the Phonoi, and with her and them its much MUCH easier than when I was communicating with a demon that popped in because it liked my panda plushies. So! Interesting, to say the least lolol!

You know what, I actually have more thoughts on digital divination than I originally thought.

I've used a couple apps/websites in the past out of curiosity and had middling results. In particular, I used the Labyrinthos app somewhat regularly for a few months a couple years ago as I was re-teaching myself tarot.

Any draws I did from the app were either spectacularly inaccurate or had small amounts of accuracy in them. Interestingly, looking at my very old notes, I would sometimes do a companion reading with a physical deck and get an entirely different outcome which would be more accurate.

On the other hand, I have a good friend who uses digital divination apps and has fairly good results from it! She's shared her draws with me for my interpretations (since I have more experience and she appreciates my insight), and they tend to be fairly accurate to her situations. Supporting readings from physical decks corroborate the digital readings at about a 75% rate for her, based on the metrics I have to hand.

It makes me wonder why it works for her but not me. Maybe it's the connection I have to my tools? My tarot readings have gotten more accurate as my familiarity with the deck(s) have gotten stronger. If I were to put as much effort into connecting with an app or website, would it still work?

Thoughts? Experiences?

#raeven talks #digital divination #sorry if i am being annoying with answering your food for thought questions lolol

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yamagucji · 4 years ago

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some tips for writing blogs, especially those who are just starting out. these are some things that works for me and may or may not work for others.

how to add a read more link on mobile

type :readmore: on a free space, then hit the enter or return button

personally i think they’re very helpful because it lessens the space you take up in your dash, and might encourage more people to rb

+ you can also add this on a spot where it gives a sort of cliffhanger, essentially making people want to ‘read more’

headers, banners, and dividers

though not necessary, it’s good to have a title for your work. make sure it’s bold and doesn’t blend in with your notes (aka pairing, warnings, etc.). this also helps when someone wants to look up one of your works in your search bar

i don’t really make banners or covers for my works. but some good apps that i know of would be picsart and canva. if you’re looking for ideas, i definitely recommend going into canva

wondering how to make those really small, thin dividers? you can make them using picsart! to make a divider hit tools > free crop > brush > size (adjust it to your preference > then draw a line along the edge of your photo > save

using the divider you just saved, go back to picsart and edit it again > draw option > hit rainbow square at the bottom left corner > hit suction/droplet symbol right below the check mark > color in the white spots bc for some reason picsart glitches and makes dividers look white-ish

new blog? just opened an account?

this is gonna sound really frustrating. but... tumblr needs to check if you’re a bot or not. what does this mean? it’s likely that your first few posts won’t show up on the search bar. you may not even get to edit your header/pfp yet ://

this happened to me and there was no visibility on my account at ALL. what helped me get ‘verified’ is that i followed a LOT of accounts, liked a bunch of posts, made some posts here and there. now that lets tumblr know you’re not a bot

visibility

the tumblr tagging system usually only allows the first 5 tags in your post to show up. so, what can do you about this? only use FIVE or less tags in your post. wait about 15 minutes or more until you can add some more tags in your post, and they usually all show up like that

another important thing about using tags is not to generalize! especially if you’re using a popular tag. but also don’t specify it too much where barely anyone looks it up. for example, if you’re writing a gn piece about oikawa, i recommend you use the tags such as: oikawa x reader, haikyuu x reader, oikawa x gn!reader, haikyuu headcanons, etc

a good rule of thumb is to use character x reader tags first, then leave the full name or fandom tag last

FOR NSFW: tumblr doesn’t let any tags with nsfw show up. so, give your nsfw works another tag. maybe #namegetspicy idk, you figure it out

FOR WARNINGS: especially if you’re a dark content creator, i highly encourage you to add tw:xyz tags. if you already have a warning note at the top then that’s great. but even better for readers who prefer to actually block these tags that way they never get to see it

another important thing to note is that people have different timezones. it helps if you rb your work at a different time of the day, in case people missed it! (icymi) i’ve noticed that reblogging helps to make your post show up in the tags

interaction + feedback

first and foremost, you are not obligated to write for your followers, and neither are your followers obligated to interact with you. remember that everyone has their own individual lives, and they have their own things to do— so do you, too.

make friends! become mutuals with other writers, visit their ask box. i know it can be daunting having to initiate these things, but you might just turn out to have fun! you can’t expect people to interact with you if you’re not interacting (back). it’s... kind of a two way thing yk? no need to be afraid to interact with other writers. oh, and rb other writers works!

pspsps join tag games or do ask games. it’s fun and very interactive

it never hurts to ask for feedback. i usually do this in a more subtle way because i don’t really expect a full on analysis on my works. maybe a little, is this okay? or feedback appreciated. sometimes it takes a little bit of coaxing for the silent readers

formatting your posts and blog

i generally put in the title at the top in big, bold letters

then comes the header/divider. helps to make the post more... visually appealing ig?

it’s important to add warnings (if any) and the pairing. the audience is not all female, and it might be a little frustrating for male readers having to find out its an x fem reader piece like halfway through your fic

if you have multiple works posted, it’s really really helpful to have a navigation page!

you can organize the posts you make with tags! for example, if you’re shitposting, you can use a specific tag for that. if you have a nsfw related post (ESPECIALLY when your blog is open to the general audience) please make a tag for it

themes + colors

if you have a color in mind but don’t know which direction to go from there, i recommend looking up color + aesthetic

looking to use the same color? download a name color app that’ll give you a hex code for any color you want to use. then, you can type in that hex code for when you’re choosing a color for your tumblr bio

wondering how to make your header image small like mine? just choose a photo for your header and turn off the stretch image option

want to use a different text color that tumblr doesn’t offer? it’s not as complicated as you think. you’ll have to go on a desktop to do this and do some html (but trust me, it’s not very difficult). look up “HTML noob but trying my best - how to use colored text on desktop”

^^ i don’t have the link for the color text tutorial so you can try looking it up

how to make an aesthetic navi and masterlist

step 1: decide a theme! if you’re stuck, think about a character + color/season/mood or look up “[insert] aesthetic” to find some inspiration. or you can try looking at other blogs too

step 2: find a color scheme! it’s easier if you choose fewer colors. if you want to use the same color for both divider and text, download a color name app in order to get the hex code of that color.

step 3: add categories to your navi! most navigation pages include a link to masterlist, about/byi, and rules. your navi should have a title that indicates that it’s... a navigation page. you can add thin colored dividers with the same color to make it easier for followers to navigate

step 4: you can choose to create a ‘cover’ or a picture for your navigation and masterlist! again, i recommend you use the canva app as a starting point

extra: search up emoticon symbols to spice up your titles!

reminder for you as a writer

you’re not obligated to do any of these things. i’ve noticed that we tend to build pressure on ourselves when it comes to content and interaction. remember, this !! is !! for !! fun !! when you realize that it’s no longer fun, then know that it’s time to take a break. and there’s nothing wrong with a bit of self care.

^^ c/p from this post lol

at the end of the day, follower count and interaction doesn’t define you. again for the love of beings, you’re here on your own accord.

will be adding more if needed/asked.

#cupid; talks!#cueuepid

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the-insomniac-emporium · 3 years ago

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Mia Deserved Better: An Analysis of RE8's Themes/Symbolism

Foreword: I would like to thank @lepusrufus for posting about both Mia and Miranda, and at one point directly saying that Mia deserved better, which is a large part of what caused me to start examining her role in the canon story. Now, I will say that this post, like some of my previous explorations of Village (such as my attempt to determine Donna's age), will not be the best organized. My ADHD makes such things rather difficult for me. However, I have tried more than usual, and have broken up this "essay" into several distinct sections. Still, I am worried that my thoughts will not be as concise or coherent as they were inside my head.

Under read-more for length and spoilers for RE8: Village.

Introduction:

Village is, inarguably, about parenthood. Is it a horror game? Yes. Is it also science fiction? Also yes. But is it still, at its core, a story, and therefore contains imagery, symbolism, and themes? Yes. Now, you may be wondering what this has to do with Mia deserving better. My proposal is as follows: While Village is overall about parenthood, it is more about motherhood than fatherhood. Furthermore, Mia's background + actions from the previous game tie her story directly with Mother Miranda's, making their potential interactions massively important to the story... and could have served the theme beautifully. The missed potential in her involvement in the story is honestly a little bit absurd.

Now, let's examine each of the Four Lords + their sections, as the beginning of analyzing the game's theme.

Lady Dimitrescu + Castle:

Ah, perhaps the clearest (albeit unimportant) bits of theme within the whole game. We are immediately presented with another parent, with three daughters she loves very, very much. Initially they work as a team to capture Ethan, easily overpowering him. When they do split up, each still has dialogue regarding their family members. Each of the daughters expresses a desire to be like their mother/make their mother proud. Lady Dimitrescu herself gets very upset every time one of her daughters perishes, and delivers some important dialogue about this in her final confrontation with Ethan.

To paraphrase, Lady D says that Ethan has done something unforgiveable, caused damage that can never heal, and deserves to die before his daughter. That last part is interesting, in the sense that Lady D seems to believe that outlasting your own child is a fate so terrible that she would not wish it upon anyone, including the person who killed her daughters.

Throughout her dialogue and actions, Lady D serves as an important figure of a living mother. What do I mean by that? Well, the only other mothers we see in game are Mia and Miranda. The former doesn't show up until almost the end of the game (seeing as the "Mia" at the start is not actually the real Mia), while the latter does not have a living child, and her behavior has (presumably) changed quite a bit since that loss. As Ethan goes through Castle Dimitrescu, he watches (he causes) Lady D to go through what Miranda did all those decades ago. When we see her loss, when we experience her loss, it is something we connect with, even comparing it (as Lady D does) to Ethan's loss of Rose.

For the more visual side of symbolism, we can turn to Lady Dimitrescu herself. She is very tall, is visibly older than the majority of the Village cast, and has a fairly classic (old-school) motherly look. Everything about her reinforces her position as an example of a mother, especially when she's with her daughters and becomes such a strong figure of protection. Her height allows her to seem the caretaker for her children, even though they are scary/intimidating in their own right.

Donna Beneviento + Waterfall House:

Yes, the baby/fetus/monstrosity is part of this. No, it is not the only bit of thematic work in this section of the game.

To begin, you can find out that Donna is officially the adopted daughter of Mother Miranda. Her birth parents are dead, implied to be from especially tragic causes (more than is the norm when it comes to "orphan making"), and she has suffered greatly from it. We see that she has been seemingly neglected by Miranda, and is incredibly isolated. The tragedy of her loss, along with the consequences presented by it, are something to keep in mind further down the road, when we inevitably deal with Ethan's own death.

One of the consequences of the environment Donna was raised in is, arguably, her reliance on Angie. While interpretations of their exact relationship (aka how much control Donna actually has at any given point) vary, the two very clearly have something akin to a mother/daughter vibe. Alternatively an older sister/younger sister sort of thing. This shows in the way that Donna holds/carries Angie, as well as the contrast in their demeanors. Moreso, the fact that Donna gave a part of herself to create Angie is almost enough to make the symbolism nonnegotiable.

We also see that Donna has a strong understanding of family/family dynamics, through the way that she uses her powers to manipulate Ethan. She dissects his connections to Mia and Rose, taunts him with the lengths he's willing to go to save his child, then shows him a grotesque version of parenthood: The aforementioned fetus monster. Does the monster represent Ethan's fears, or Donna's?

What if the monster is how Donna sees herself, in some way, perhaps thinking that it's her fault her parents died? Bit of a stretch, but it's not a keystone of my theory, so I'm just throwing it out there. We could, however, go a step further and ask ourselves if Donna has noticed the way Miranda neglects her, and the fetus monster is how Donna thinks Miranda sees her. A baby, true, but grotesque, so terribly imperfect compared to her "real daughter" (Eva, obvs).

Regardless, the monster presents an ugly side of parenthood. It shows us the blood, the hunger (with the way it repeatedly attempts to swallow Ethan whole), the wailing. If Lady D shows us the love of parenthood, the bond, Donna in turn shows us the hate, the misery. Everything that one must endure to reap the rewards of family.

Lastly, we get one last bit of symbolism with Donna's death: We play a game with Angie. A childhood classic, hide and seek. Ethan chases her down repeatedly, stabbing away, seemingly only hurting the doll. But what happens when he kills Angie? It turns out that he killed Donna. You kill the child, you kill the parent. A reinforcement of the connection that comes with parenthood, along with another notch in Ethan's family-murdering belt (not saying that he's the "true antagonist" or anything, just keeping track for one of my later points).

Moreau + The Reservoir

Let's get the worst possibility out of the way: Moreau, weakest and sickest of the four lords, lives in a reservoir, where he is relatively safe. To defeat him, you have to drain the water, forcing him onto dry(ish) land. Paired with the main ideas of his section (which I will detail after this nightmare), one could theorize that he's meant to represent birth itself. Again, he's safe in his ("womb") water, and becomes vulnerable when he leaves (like a fragile newborn). Kinda gross, in my opinion, and also not a strong enough connection for me to care much about. It was merely an interesting (albeit horrifying) enough thought that I felt it warranted sharing.

Moving on to the big stuff with Moreau: He's a baby. Evidence: Whiny, has difficulty moving around, struggles to adapt to his growth, throws up a bunch, loves his mother very much, cries for his mother when he's in trouble, etc. Although Mother Miranda does not care for him, he clearly cares for her, and plays yet another role of an abandoned child (like Donna). Without Miranda there to protect him, he perishes terribly, crying out for someone who does not care to answer.

Hearing him cry out for Miranda, over and over, only for her to continue ignoring him is a key piece in the build-up to our confrontation between Ethan and Miranda. The game, in many ways, centers around the comparison between the two. In my humble opinion, Mia should have been involved in this comparison, as opposed to supplying the solution to the result of said comparison. Yes, I know that was a lot of words that don't mean much yet, but trust me, I'm getting there.

Heisenberg + The Factory

Ironically, of the four lords, Heisenberg is the most similar to Mother Miranda. In his massive factory, he is alone except for his numerous experiments, the results of decades of playing God. In comparison to Ethan + Mia, Heisenberg represents artificial parentage, or more accurately, the artificial creation of "life". While the others Lords also performed experiments, they used living subjects. Heisenberg instead chose to use corpses, which he then "brought back to life" with cybernetics + his powers, a somewhat futuristic version of Dr. Frankenstein.

Together, Miranda and him show a rotten side of parenthood (whereas Donna + Moreau showed us the uglier side of the children themselves). To put it simply, they are bad parents. They throw their "children"/experiments into the fray, uncaring, using them as pawns for their own greater gain. The most important part of this is that Heisenberg offers to "help" Ethan: By using Rose as a weapon. In his act of refusal, Ethan demonstrates one of several important distinctions between himself and Mother Miranda. Where she is willing to use her "children" (read: lives that she is responsible for) as tools, he is not.

Miscellaneous Symbolism/Imagery:

The old hag is one of my favorite parts of Village. She's seemingly nuts, has a crazy old lady laugh, wears bones that make soothing bone noises when she moves, and she draws lots of symbols in the dirt. If you look closely (I can provide screenshots if anyone desires, but it will take a bit of work to get them onto my computer), she's drawing one of the most iconic images in the titular village: The winged unborn. This symbol acts as the key you build up after every fight with a Lord, understandably called the Unborn Key (which turns into the Winged Unborn Key). Whether this counts as foreshadowing towards the hag's identity reveal is technically irrelevant, but I like to think it does.

In essence, you build up the key, this depiction of an infant, to progress in the game. The more wings it gains, the closer you are to your goal of rescuing your child.

The cadou itself is very clearly fetus-shaped. Furthermore, the only place within the human body that we know it ever gets implanted is in the "tummy" (thanks Moreau), aka roughly where someone's womb is/would be. Every infected person we see presumably had the Cadou implanted there (though I think it would be interesting if implanting it in different spots caused different mutations. of course, that is a discussion for another day). To become immortal, you have to "bear" a "child". Does it get more direct than that?

Mother Miranda gained her immortality in part for her grief at the loss of her child. She embodied the despair that Lady D spoke of, becoming an eternal source of anguish. Just as the loss of a child is a wound that lasts forever, so too would Miranda last forever (well, until Ethan comes along).

Mia is a loving mother, who puts up with the BSAA making her move across the world, deals with the complications of having a mold husband and mold baby, and has proved herself (see her section in RE7) to be an immense badass. Previously I had forgotten that, and even embarrassed myself in the comments of another person's post by implying she wasn't a tough, ass-kicking machine. Y'all remember feral Mia? People talk about "poor Ethan's arms", but sometimes we forget that Mia was one of the people who did a number on them. Furthermore, she's one of the only living people (from outside the village) to have any connections (pun intended) to Mother Miranda. They worked together, although possibly not directly, on Evelyn. If anyone in Village has a chance of really understanding Miranda's plight, or knowing the truth behind it, it would be Mia. Yet we don't see them interact a single time. Which leads me to the next section...

Conclusion On Theme + Missed Potential:

Okay, okay, so it's pretty obvious at this point that, as previously stated, the game's theme is parenthood. Every section has its symbolism, the story is very obviously about a man trying to rescue his daughter, etc, etc, but what's the point? Is there a lesson, or a more focused interpretation of the central theme? Let's take one last step back, and focus on something I've mentioned a few times now: The comparison between Ethan and Mother Miranda.

Recurring dialogue from Ethan, Alcina, and Mother Miranda all point towards the developers acknowledging that the characters are similar, but there's nowhere near as much conversation about it as I would like. Several times we have the antagonists ask Ethan how he's so willing to kill someone else's child, or prevent them from (essentially) doing what he's doing (aka saving his daughter). While Ethan responds with a mix of "well you started it" and "aghhh fuck-a-you, bitch", there's a much more solid, unspoken difference: Mother Miranda sends her underlings to kill, so that she may revive her daughter. Ethan kills (read: does the work himself) to get his daughter. The difference is much bigger, and more important, at the end of the game, when we realize just how far it goes. Ethan dies to save his daughter. Time and time again Mother Miranda has killed others for her work, but in the end she is stopped when someone willingly dies to stop her.

Where does Mia come in? Mia, the badass mother, the one who once worked alongside Mother Miranda, should have been the nail in the coffin. She is the one who survives, who lives on to raise Rose, she is the silent solution to Ethan's sacrifice. Miranda, you fool, what could you have accomplished if you had held onto your makeshift family? Through Mia (and Chris, to a lesser degree), his "loss" becomes a victory. There's a certain poetic justice that comes with Rose's full family being instrumental in saving her, when Miranda so readily spurned her own family.

Mia could have had an actual conversation with Miranda, their history giving the latter a reason to actually listen. I'm not saying that Miranda would have changed her mind/plans, but the conversation would have been a well-needed contrast to Ethan's "arggg what the fuck is happening, I only have two reactions to things. agg fuck you". Additionally, I feel that Mia (who was captured and had to endure who-knows-what) deserves the opportunity to be the one who points out Miranda's mistakes, who delivers the final "fuck you" to her. More than that, she's the one at the end who can say that hey, maybe she can understand some of what Miranda did. Was there anything her and Ethan wouldn't have done to save Rose? As much as Ethan is a foil to Miranda, Mia could (and should) have played a similar role.

When so much of the story and symbolism revolves around Miranda's experience as a mother, it only would have been fair to shine a light on her equivalent. Her better.

There's more I wanted to say/feel like I didn't properly get across, and I might add more to this at some point, but it's 5:40 AM right now, and I'm starting to feel like my brain is slowing down, so... Feel free to reblog/comment and add your own thoughts!

#mother miranda #mia winters #ethan winters #rosemary winters #resident evil: village #re8 village #god what do I tag this as

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liquidstar · 3 years ago

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I feel as if many people, myself included, have been having problems with the way “critical thinking” is conducted in fandom circles more and more. Which I’d say is a good thing, because it means we’re thinking critically. But still the issues with the faux-critical mentality and with the way we consume media through that fandom group mentality are incredibly widespread at this point, despite being very flawed, and there are still plenty of people who follow it blindly, ironically.

I sort of felt like I had to examine my personal feelings on it and I ended up writing a whole novel, which I’ll put under the cut, and I do welcome other people’s voices in the matter, because while I’m being as nuanced as I can here I obviously am still writing from personal experience and may overlook some things from my limited perspective. But by and large I think I’ve dissected the phenomena as best I can from what I’ve been seeing going on in fandom circles from a safe but observable distance.

Right off the bat I want to say, I think it's incredibly good and necessary to be critical of media and understand when you should stop consuming it, but that line can be a bit circumstantial sometimes for different people. There are a lot of anime that I used to watch as a teenager that I can’t enjoy anymore, because I got more and more uncomfortable overtime with the sexualization of young characters, partly because as I was getting older I was really starting to realize how big of an issue it was, and I certainly think more critically now than I did when I was 14. Of course I don’t assume everyone who still watches certain series is a pedophile, and I do think there are plenty of fans that understand this. However I still stay away from those circles and that’s a personal choice.

I don’t think a person is morally superior based on where they draw the line and their own boundaries with this type of stuff, what’s more important is your understanding of the problem and response to it. There are series I watch that have a lot of the same issues around sexualization of the young characters in the cast, but they’re relatively toned down and I can still enjoy the aspects of the series I actually like without it feeling as uncomfortable and extreme. Others will not be able to, and their issues with it are legitimate and ones that I still ultimately agree with, but they’re still free to dislike the series for it, after all our stance on the issue itself is the same so why would I resent them for it?

Different people are bound to have different lines they draw for how far certain things can go in media before they’re uncomfortable watching it and it doesn’t make it a moral failing of the person who can put up with more if they’re still capable of understanding why it’s bad to begin with and able to not let it effect them. But I don’t think that sentiment necessarily contradicts the idea that some things really are too far gone for this to apply, the above examples aren’t the same thing as a series centered solely around lolicon ecchi and it doesn’t take a lot of deep analysis to understand why. It’s not about a personal line anymore when it comes to things that are outright propaganda or predatory with harmful ideals woven into the message of the story itself. Critical thinking means knowing the difference between these, and no one can hold your hand through it. And simply slapping “I’m critical of my interests” on your bio isn’t a get out of jail free card, it’s always evident when someone isn’t truly thinking about the impact of the media they consume through the way they consume it.

I think the issue is that when people apply “Critical thinking” they don’t actually analyze the story and its intent, messages, themes, morals, and all that. Instead they approach it completely diegetically, it’s basically the thermian argument, the issue stems from thinking about the story and characters as if they’re real people and judging their actions through that perspective, rather than something from a writer trying to deliver a narrative by using the story and characters as tools. Like how people get upset about characters behaving “problematically” without realizing that it’s an intentional aspect of the story, that the character needs to cause problems for there to be conflict. What they should be looking at instead is what their behavior represents in the real world.

You do not need to apply real-world morals to fictional characters, you need to apply them to the narrative. The story exists in the real world, the characters and events within it do not. Fictional murderers themselves do not hurt anyone, no one is actually dying at their hands, but their actions hold weight in the narrative which itself can harm real people. If the character only murders gay people then it reflects on whatever the themes and messages of the story are, and it’s a major issue if it's framed as if they’re morally justified, or as if this is a noble action. And it’s a huge red flag if people stan this character, even if the story itself actually presents their actions as reprehensible. Or cases where the murderers themselves are some kind of awful stereotype, like Buffalo Bill who presents a violent and dangerous stereotype of trans women, making the character a transmisogynistic caricature (Intentional or otherwise) that has caused a lot of harm to the perception of trans women. When people say “Fiction affects reality” this is what they mean. They do not mean “People will see a pretend bad guy and become bad” they mean “Ideals represented in fiction will be pulled from the real world and reflected back onto it.”

However, stories shouldn’t have to spoon-feed you the lesson as if you’re watching a children’s cartoon, stories often have nuances and you have to actively analyze the themes of it all to understand it’s core messages. Oftentimes it can be intentionally murky and hard to parse especially if the subject matter itself is complicated. But you can’t simply read things on the surface and think you understand everything about them, without understanding the symbolism or subtext you can leave a series like Revolutionary Girl Utena thinking the titular Utena is heterosexual and was only ever in love with her prince. Things won’t always be face-value or clear-cut and you will be forced to come to your own conclusions sometimes too.

That’s why the whole fandom-based groupthink mentality about “critical thinking” doesn’t work, because it’s not critical. It’s simply looking into the crowd, seeing people say a show is problematic, and then dropping it without truly understanding why. It’s performative, consuming the best media isn’t activism and it doesn’t make you a better person. Listening to the voices of people whom the issues directly concerns will help you form an opinion, and to understand the issues from a more knowledgeable perspective beyond your own. All that means nothing if you just sweep it under the rug because you want to look infallible in your morality. That’s not being critical, it’s just being scared to analyze yourself, as well as what you engage with. You just don’t want to think about those things and you’re afraid of being less than perfect so you pretend it never happened.

And though I’m making this post, it’s not mine or anyone else’s job to hold your hand through all this and tell you “Oh this show is okay, but this show isn't, and this book is bad etc etc etc”. Because you actually have to think for yourself, you know, critically. Examples I’ve listed aren’t rules of thumb, they’re just examples and things will vary depending on the story and circumstance. You have to look at shit on a case-by-case basis instead of relying on spotting tropes without thinking about how they’re implemented and what they mean. That’s why it’s analysis, you have to use it to understand what the narrative is communicating to its audience, explicitly or implicitly, intentionally or incidentally, and understand how this reflects the real world and what kind of impact it can have on it.

A big problem with fandom is it has made interests synonymous with personality traits, as if every series we consume is a core part of our being, and everything we see in it reflects our viewpoints as well. So when people are told that a show they watched is problematic, they react very extremely, because they see it as basically the same thing as saying they themselves are problematic (It’s not). Everyone sees themselves as good people, they don’t want to be bad people, so this scares them and they either start hiding any evidence that they ever liked it, or they double down and start defending it despite all its flaws, often providing those aforementioned thermian arguments (“She dresses that way because of her powers!”).

That’s how you get people who call children’s cartoons “irredeemable media” and people who plaster “fiction=/= reality!” all over their blogs, both are basically trying to save face either by denying that they could ever consume anything problematic or denying that the problematic aspects exist all together. And absolutely no one is actually addressing the core issues anymore, save for those affected by them who pointed them out to begin with, only for their original point to become muffled in the discourse. No one is thinking critically because they’re more concerned with us-vs-them group mentality, both sides try to out-perform the other while the actual issue gets ignored or is used as nothing more than a gacha with no true understanding or sympathy behind it.

One of the other issues that comes from this is the fact that pretty much everyone thinks they’re the only person capable of being critical of their interests. That’s how you get those interactions where one person goes “OK [Media] fan” and another person replies “Bro you literally like [Other Media]”, because both parties think they’re the only ones capable of consuming a problematic piece of media and not becoming problematic themselves, anyone else who enjoys it is clearly incapable of being as big brained as them. It’s understandable because we know ourselves and trust ourselves more than strangers, and I’m not saying there can’t be certain fandoms who’s fans you don’t wanna interact with, but when we presume that we know better than everyone else we stop listening to other people all together. It’s good to trust your own judgement, it’s bad to assume no one else has the capacity to think for themselves either though.

The insistence that all media that you personally like is without moral failing and completely pure comes with the belief that all media that you personally dislike has to be morally bad in some way. As if you can’t just dislike a series because you find it annoying or it just doesn’t appeal to you, it has to be problematic, and you have to justify your dislike of it through that perspective. You have to believe that your view on whatever media it is is the objectively correct one, so you’ll likely pick apart all it’s flaws to prove you’re on the right side, but there’s no analysis of context or intent. Keep in mind this doesn’t necessarily mean those critiques are unfounded or invalid, but in cases like this they’re often skewed in one direction based on personal opinion. It’s just as flawed as ignoring all the faults in the stuff you like, it’s biased and subjective analysis that misses a lot of context in both cases, it’s not a good mindset to have about consuming media. It’s just another result of tying media consumption with identity and personal morals. The faux-critical mentality is an attempt to separate the two in a way that implies they’re a packaged deal to begin with, making it sort of impossible to truly do so in any meaningful way.

As far as I know this whole phenomena started with “Steven Universe Critical” in, like, 2016, and that’s where this mentality around “critical thinking” originated. It started out with just a few people correctly pointing out very legitimate issues with the series, but over time it grew into just a trend where people would make cutesy kin blogs with urls like critical-[character] or [character]crit to go with the fad as it divulged into Nostalgia Critic level critique. Of course there was backlash to this and criticism of the criticism, but no actual conversation to be had. Just people trying to out-do each other by acting as the most virtuous one in the room, and soon enough the fad became a huge echo-chamber that encouraged more and more outrageous takes for every little thing. The series itself was a children’s cartoon so it stands to reason that a lot of the fans were young teens, so this behavior isn’t too surprising and I do believe a lot of them did think they were doing the right thing, especially since it was encouraged. But that doesn’t erase the fact that there were actual real issues and concerns brought up about the series that got treated with very little sympathy and were instead drowning out people’s voices. Though those from a few years back may have grown up since and know better (Hopefully), the mentality stuck around and influenced the norm for how fandoms and fandom people conduct any sort of critique on media.

That’s a shame to me, because the pedestal people place fandom onto has completely disrupted our perception on how to engage with media in a normal way. Not everything should be consumed with fandom in mind, not everything is a coffee-shop au with no conflict, not everything is a children’s cartoon with the morals spoon-fed to you. Fandom has grown past the years of uncritical praise of a series, it’s much more mainstream now with a lot more voices in it beyond your small community on some forum, and people are allowed to use those voices. Just because it may not be as pleasant for you now because you don’t get to just turn your brain off and ignore all the flaws doesn’t mean you can put on your rose-tinted nostalgia goggles and pretend that fandom is actually all that is good in the world, to the point where you place it above the comfort and safety of others (Oftentimes children). Being uncritical of fandom itself is just as bad as being uncritical of what you consume to begin with.

At the end of the day it all just boils down to the ability to truly think for yourself but with sympathy and compassion for other people in mind, while also understanding that not everyone will come to the same conclusion as you and people are allowed to resent your interests. That doesn’t necessarily mean they hate you personally, you should be acknowledging the same issues after all. You can’t ignore aspects of it that aren’t convenient to your conclusion, you have to actually be critical and understand the issues to be able to form it.

I think that all we need is to not rely on fandom to tell us what to do, but still listen to the voices of others, take them into account to form our opinion too, boost their voices instead of drowning them out in the minutiae of internet discourse about which character is too much of an asshole to like. Think about what the characters and story represent non-diegetically instead of treating them like real people and events, rather a story with an intent and message to share through its story and characters, and whatever those reflect from the real world. That’s how fiction affects reality, because it exists in reality and reflects reality through its own lens. The story itself is real, with a real impact on you and many others, so think about the impact and why it all matters. Just… Think. Listen to others but think for yourself, that’s all.

#see i told you guys id find that essay and post it for real. i wasnt kidding.#good luck inbox of mine :praying:

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vqlisms · 2 years ago

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@pumpkaboomark this ones for u since i couldn’t fit all my thoughts into a reply 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 fair warning i’m only at episode 6 at the time of writing this but i’m loving it so much

ok rq we love implied bi ahiru in this house <3

ok so. there is so much i hate about how most media’s go about romance, regarding of how relevant it is to the plot. one thing that princess tutu avoids super well is just the whole thing (ESPECIALLY in media aimed at children) where one of the characters will literally just stalk the other and the writers will either jump through hoops to justify it or just. write it off as a joke but not actually acknowledge how shitty it is. princess tutu completely ignores that trope. ahiru and mytho go to the same boarding dance school, which seems like a perfect set-up for the whole “oh i’ll just memorise all of his classes and dorm number,” but a good amount of her and mytho’s interactions are caused by her being surprised to find or see him somewhere. the most she’s aware of is that she’ll occasionally see him in windows, but it’s never to the point where she recognises which is his dorm specifically and checks it obsessively. it’s really refreshing!!

another thing that i just have to add rq: i like that the one quote unquote “fanservice-y” thing that feels even somewhat like fanservice is just cat-teacher’s threats to marry the students. like, yeah, hate that, but it’s so great to see the students actually like,, grossed out and dissuaded when the jokes are made toward them, especially when a lot of media’s with romance aspects will have the creepiest people flirting with characters or being love interests or whatever. like,, i tried reading csm a few days before i started watching princess tutu and i barely got three chapters in because i was already just so off-put by the “romance” that was literally just. yucky (that was also what prompted the og post, though i’ve had that opinion for a long time)

i should also say, this is i think the only show where i’ve seen nudity and it hasn’t felt inherently sexual. my best comparison is with madoka magica bc that’s the only other magical girl show i’ve watched (and i saw a really good analysis on the show’s themes/symbolism). like, with madoka, i had a sort-of 50-50 opinion of the nudity. idk if it was the artists’ intent, but the only times they used it were in scenes that were (at least to some degree) supposed to represent/imply innocence or purity or vulnerability, which is a common symbol in media. still, there was too much detail put into drawing the bodies that just,, ew ew ew, even knowing the symbolism and all that. i was genuinely surprised when i didn’t get that same reaction with princess tutu. i think part of it is that the censorship feels natural; it feels like looking at a young kid, and there is so little fanservice or thinly-veiled sexual content that, paired with the in-story reason, it doesn’t feel like these scenes were added just to attract weirdos. the artstyle itself also doesn’t lend itself to anything suggestive (aka literally all of the minor characters have the same frame). it’s nice to also see the transformation-doesn’t-affect-clothes trope done in a way that isn’t blatantly for those tension scenes. in princess tutu, a lot of effort is put into conveying to the watcher that ahiru isn’t fully meant to be human — she’s clumsy, her verbal stim is “quack”, her name is literally “Duck”, she struggles with time and scheduling, not knowing common human knowledge (holidays, socially acceptable responses, etc). somehow, the writers managed to make that trope feel,, clean? i don’t really know how else to explain it. it feels natural when considering the rest of ahiru’s transformation situation, if that makes sense.

also, princess tutu completely avoided my usual hatred for the whole this-love-is-forbidden-for-made-up-reason-x trope. as i said in the tags, at least from what i’ve seen the trope usually boils down to one of two situations: we are bad at communication and that is literally the entire reason this media even has a plot, or have some made up arbitrary oppression that is somehow preventing the main character from getting with their love interest. princess tutu has brought in an unforeseen third option: want to communicate and would probably be good at it but has several good reasons not to. one: ahiru is literally a duck. not even anthropomorphic. just duck. even outside of a romantic context, literally how are you supposed to explain that to someone, ESPECIALLY when that is technically your default form. she’s not even supposed to be human in the first place. how the fuck is anyone supposed to explain that, even with evidence, and then segue into “hey wanna maybe go out next friday?” reason two: the whole “hey we are both from a tragedy where if i confess my love i will literally fucking die” thing. idk if princess tutu and the duck are the same character in the storybook, but ahiru is both of them, so it’s completely logical for her to assume she’d take both of their roles. she is working under the assumption that the storybook is real, and her evidence is that the prince is alive and she has tasked herself with gathering metaphysical pieces of his heart that then give him the capacity to feel certain emotions again. in that type of situation, especially since she hasn’t read the stories the prince, duck, and tutu are from, she’s working purely off of what she’s heard from fakir, mytho, and rue. rue said that princess tutu turned into sparkles and flew away after confessing her love to her love interest, and rue didn’t know anyone besides fakir was listening, so she didn’t have a reason to lie about that being tutu’s end in the book. ahiru has also shown that, even if mytho doesn’t want to get with her at any point, she was still willing to put together his heart just to give him the opportunity to feel again. it’s not out of character for her to decide that she just wouldn’t confess to him so that she could keep living and maybe try and be his friend instead. also, because she is literally a child, it also makes sense that she isn’t thinking about if that curse could also affect anyone she may like outside of mytho!! because she is a child! with such a small amount of life experience! because she was also literally a duck several days ago!!!

also bc i ended up getting to episode 8: GOD IM SO GLAD THAT THE SHOW DOESNT SHY AWAY FROM THE REPERCUSSIONS OF A CHARATER HETTIGN THEIR EMOTIONS BACK!!!! mytho getting fucking terrified of princess tutu and literally everything else makes sense!!! he doesn’t know how emotions work!!!! and there’s a good chance that the fear was legit anyways because he is in an inherently confusing and terrifying situation of feeling for the first time in (insert however long he’s been alive)!!!!! that shit should be terrifying!!!!!! especially when you can’t recall what it is like to have these emotions in the first place!!!!!!! it’s natural that he would assume immediately that his fear was for the person giving him back his emotions!!!!!!!!!

also, and i have no fucking clue how to back this up, but somehow princess tutu doesn’t feel like that “falls in love with their saviour” trope. it might just be the fact that i’m not that far in yet, and it might be that mytho literally doesn’t have the capacity for love yet, but even with ahiru herself, i love that she isn’t collecting his heart pieces for the sole purpose of trying to make him fall in love. there’s two parts to this ofc; one is that she literally can’t confess to him because she will turn into sparkles and fly away. the second one is that she also just,, genuinely wants to see him thrive again. she wants to see that loneliness disappear from his eyes, even if she isn’t the one to cause it. it’s sweet, and i love that while she is motivated by love, that seems to almost take a back seat to her sense of justice and care for him!!

one last thing rq, speaking of ahiru being a literal duck, i love that they don’t make that seem manipulative even in the romance aspect! i’m tired of shows that are just,, “caretaker of person who has no human experience falls in love with person and they fall in love back” because a good 70% of the time it just comes off weird. love that princess tutu completely avoided that by not only making the person with no human experience the main character, but also giving her completely regular besties who fill her in whenever necessary instead of falling into that weird way-too-dependent relationship trope.

okie that’s it for right now!!! if i have more thoughts i will send them to uu 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩💙

i need more authors to understand that. adding romance and making it fucking creepy as hell for no reason just turns potential enjoyers away, even if it is in every other way well-written and interesting.

#q talks sometimes #princess tutu

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get-shiggy-with-it · 4 years ago

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*°:⋆ₓₒCollab Masterlistₓₒ⋆:°*

Pairing: All Might x Gn!Dom!Reader (Theme for this month was sex work au!)

Word Count: 6.2k

Warnings: 18+ this is a dark fic, both dubcon/noncon, straight up, forced submission, bit of mind break, dom/sub dynamics, sub!All Might, dominant All Might later in, dark All Might, violence against reader, bodily harm, face fucking, spanking (for Toshi), thigh riding (for Toshi), blackmail, minor mentions of blood, bondage/rope play, reader is gender neutral, no pronouns used

Summary: You work as a popular dominant for pro heroes who need to give up control once in awhile and Yagi Toshinori is one of your best clients. But when word gets out to the media about your involvement with pros, you decide to take matters into your own hands. Though you quickly discover All Might does not take kindly to anyone who threatens his reputation.

It was all about the exchanging of power.

About the relinquishing of control—about letting go and the freedom that came with it.

And you?

You were just there to facilitate, to take over, to release all those bottled up years of stress that the camera’s weren’t supposed to see.

But you did.

You saw all of it.

It was about trust too. Trust in you to give them what they need and trust in them to do exactly as you instructed. And most of all, trust that everything stayed confidential. That the things said through tears and whimpers and sighs were kept quiet. Trust that they would show you the same respect and privacy you showed them.

You took these rules very seriously. They were the foundation your business was built on and it had earned you quite a lot of credibility. You prided yourself on it, as you should. Professionalism was key in your line of work. It made the clients feel a bit more comfortable—counteracted the sense of taboo that was usually associated with people like you.

People in “your line of work,” was the common way of referencing it. But you preferred to be clear and upfront, not skirt around the edges as though your job was something shameful.

Language was important too.

“Client,” “session,” etc...all added a buffering degree of separation for those you serviced. It was a crucial part of the balance which has allowed you to be so successful. They needed to be able to remove themselves from who they became once you were alone together. You’d learned that some amount of plausible deniability was key to achieving the complete relinquishing of authority. They had to be able to convince themselves after they’d walked away, that the crying, begging mess they’d become wasn’t who they really were—wasn’t actually a part of them, just something you’d done.

And by them, of course, you meant the heroes you served so dutifully.

And by serve, you meant completely and utterly dominate.

Contradictory to most common misconceptions, your job wasn’t always about sex—though it could be and was at time—but truly, it was about release.

And above all, it was about power and who got to hold it.

When that structure was broken—when the rules were strayed from—that’s when things got murky. But you were good at what you did, so luckily, that hadn’t been much of an issue.

What more could one expect from someone whose services are sought out by the Symbol of Peace himself?

Hm.

You really ought to get that put on your business cards.

***

It was late when he came to you, though that wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. Occasional hero work coupled with a teaching schedule and numerous media appearances left one very little free time. Fortunately, you conducted most of your business during the small hours of the morning, so Yagi Toshinori showing up at your door as the clock ticked its way past two wasn’t a shock.

You fell into the usual rhythm of things easily.

Toshi was one of your newest, but most favorite clients. You came highly recommended from many of his coworkers, and after an initial meeting over drinks to discuss his needs, you struck up a routine that worked for the both of you.

Of course he paid you handsomely for your time.

Constantly being in the public eye, acting as an unwavering representation of hope for the future was tiring. You were more than happy to take the weight off his very broad shoulders for once.

And bend him over your knee instead.

“Five,” he panted, whimpers of thanks and your name spilling out around his loose tongue as your hand connected sharply with the meat of his ass again.

You always asked to be called by name, no frilly titles to get in the way and complicate the dynamic. When they walked into your space, they set aside their hero personas and you afforded them the same intimacy.

Names meant something. Names were power and so they mattered, particularly in this game you played together. Equality had to be achieved before domination.

“Good boy Toshi, you’re doing so well,” you cooed and brought your palm down twice, watching the skin on the backs of his thighs bloom pink like sakura in the spring.

“S-six, seven,” there was a wet spot forming under his mouth on the sheets and on your lap where his cock was bare and leaking. “Ah, please—harder!”

You raised your brow as he turned his head to look at you with those teary, dark eyes and you could never resist a look like that.

“You want it harder, why’s that?” you wound back and smacked roughly over the raised welts that made him hiss and sob. “Is this what you deserve for being so weak?”

He may have been thin now, skeletal compared to the face he showed the public, but you didn’t mind. He trusted you enough to let his guard down, and his weight was still thick and full across your legs. It was invigorating to see a man like All Might, reduced to this. Whatever pent up guilt he carried inside, you were here to help let it all out in the best way you knew how.

“Yes!” Toshi cried and buried his face into the plush fabric of your comforter as you delivered the last three harsh blows of the punishment he paid you for. “Fuck yes, I’m weak and I’m a failure and I deserve this—!”

“That’s right, you’re a piss poor excuse for a hero and you haven’t earned your title,” you wrapped two thick locks of his hair around your hand and yanked hard till he craned his neck to face you. “What would the world say if they could see what a sobbing mess you are when no one’s looking?”

He opened his mouth to speak, hips twitching and grinding uselessly against your thigh. The second that plush pink tongue dipped past his lips, you were rearing back to spit straight between his teeth.

Toshi’s face was always priceless in these moments. You’d almost be willing to do it for free if you only got to see the way his brows shot up and those red rimmed eyes blew so wide as you steeled yourself and looked him dead on.

“Now, swallow like the little bitch I know you are.”

And he did, of course he does, because behind your bedroom door Yagi Toshinori was your good boy. So you got to watch his throat bob as your spit slid down and he moaned so pretty at the awful things you said to him.

Your palm kneaded against the red, raw flesh of his ass and you watched how he squirmed at the sting. The room was filled with the scent of sweat and expensive cologne. Your head was spinning from the smell alone and the high of the control you wielded over this man. His hands fisted hard in your bed sheets and you let him helplessly rut against you a few times before running your free hand up the graceful curve of his spine.

“Oh, you really are so disgusting Toshi,” you mused as your nails dig into the planes of muscles to drag angry red lines over the skin. “Did you really get that hard from me slapping this tight little ass of yours?”

He groaned pathetically and nodded, not bothering to hide how his dick had been oozing obscene amounts of precum every time you etched a new welt on his skin. The blush that crept up his chest and painted his cheeks had spread between his legs too. The unfairly massive cock that Toshi sported was flushed a dark angry red at the tip and you couldn’t help but have mercy on him.

Well, only a little bit.

You weren’t here to be nice tonight, even if a part of you might have liked to be.

“Do you want to cum, Toshi?” you asked, lacing your voice with the false sweetness you knew he loved. “Have you been aching for it all night?”

He keened, crying your name and rutting his hips harder against you. It sent a rush of warmth between your legs despite your better efforts to remain unaffected. This wasn’t about you, this was about ownership and his pleasure.

“Mhmm,” his voice was little more than a rasp, “wanna cum so bad, please!”

You laughed, but it was a cruel thing and you knew he could feel the rumble of it in his scarred chest.

“You did so perfectly taking your punishment,” you raked your nails over the raised handprints again just to hear him cry out. “I suppose I’ll let you cum, but you’ll have to work for it.”

Toshi’s breathing was ragged as you helped him up to straddle one of your legs. His swollen cock rested on the plushest part of your thigh, the tip nudging your hip and drawing choked gasps from the man towering above you.

He stared down at you, confused when you didn’t move to stroke him.

“Go on, then,” you smiled up at him, resting your weight on your palms so you could lean back and watch the show. “I said you’d have to work for it, didn’t I?”

You punctuated your question with a bounce of your knee that rocked his length against the fabric of your pants. It didn’t take long for him to catch on, eyes squeezing shut against the waves of shame and embarrassment that just made it so much hotter as he slowly began to ride your thigh.

He might be paying you to be ruthless, but Toshi was kind to a fault from what you’ve learned of him and he ke[t most of his massive weight held on the balls of his feet so you weren’t crushed below him. Under any other circumstances, you might have actually enjoyed that quite a bit, but his face—cherry red with spit-slicked lips held parted with the force of his pants—was enough for now.

His cock was so heavy you almost couldn’t believe it was real. You nearly didn’t the first time he’d stripped for you, but even just the drag of it through your clothes was delectable. It was so long and thick you needed both hands to wrap fully around it, and he gushed like a fucking gieser when you got him under your metaphorical boot.

With every rock of his bony hips, his length was forced up against the curve of your stomach and he whined at the glistening strands of slick that connected his tip to you.

“Come on, Toshi,” you clicked your tongue disappointedly at him, letting a hand fall to the puckered skin at his waist, squeezing harshly. “I know you can do better than that.”

He was beyond words now, you could tell by the way his jaw was loose and his teeth clacked with every thrust, but he did gasp out a long, high pitched moan that made up for it. The speed of his humping increased, becoming erratic as he hunched on the bed, hands beside yours. He loomed over you but anyone could tell just by the composed, serene smile playing at your lips—and the absolutely wrecked noises spilling from Toshi—just which one of you was really in control.

“You’re so close, aren’t you?”

You knew he liked it when you spewed filth to him right before he boiled over and you were more than willing to oblige.

“You’re gonna cum like a fucking teenager humping his pillow, isn’t that right?” you snarled the words up at him and he really did cry then, big fat tears dripping down onto your shirt. “All Might, the number one hero is gonna cum all over my lap like the slut he is.”

He nods frantically. You know his balls were tensing up as he sobbed and spluttered—completely ruined. Just the way he needed to be.

“Then cum.”

You finally wrapped your fist just around his aching tip and he exploded into your palm. Rope after rope of sticky, white release coated your arm and dripped onto the bed. He kept grinding his hips, working himself through the climax, cock still pulsing and leaking in your grip. You didn’t mind the mess.

He always tipped a bit extra if he left stains anyway.

Such a gentleman.

When the last wave of his orgasm had petered out, Toshi collapsed to the side with his face buried in your pillow and his long legs still strewn across your lap. He didn’t usually ask for much in the realm of aftercare, preferring that you cleaned him and let him rest for a bit before he suited up and rushed off into the night.

You gave him a minute before you got up to wet a warm cloth in the sink. He looked so destroyed, you couldn’t help but admire your handiwork. As you palm his ass once more, fingers spreading him so his pink hole was on display, you slipped your phone silently from your pocket, and snapped a few shots of the nasty red hand marks and smears of cum as he groaned deeply at the touch.

His voice was lower as he grunted and you could tell he’s coming out of the subspace you’d thrust him into hours before. Quickly you slid the device smoothly away before lifting his legs from you and settling them gently on the bed to work on tidying up your mess.

You didn’t feel particularly good about keeping this kind of collateral, but as much power as you hold in the four walls of your bedroom, you were frustratingly weak once you left them. These men you worked with, while generally professional, were also top heroes. Top heroes who really didn’t want their embarrassing private lives getting out. Top heroes who thrived off reputation and who would willingly throw you under the bus in a second to protect that.

You liked Yagi Toshinori.

But you didn’t know him.

Smacking someone’s ass or stroking their cock every few weeks didn’t mean much in the grand scheme of things.

So you kept your personal insurance that would be there should one of your clientele decide to forsake you in favor of their public image. And you would never use it unless you absolutely had too.

After all, this was about trust and power and the exchange of those two things. Or at least it was supposed to be. Trust was quite a subjective thing.

The general citizenry trusted All Might to protect them against the growing evil in Japan’s underground. But behind the scenes, you knew his failing health had caused him to seek you out as the intense guilt of his lie came crashing down on him.

Toshi trusted you to relieve his pain and indulge in his degrading fantasies, and you hadn’t failed him yet.

But your trust was not easily bought, and none of your customers ever paid much mind to whether your perceived belief in them was genuine.

After so many glimpses into the messes of pro-heroes personal lives, you knew you’d have to be your own protector. Hence, the photos remained in a locked folder hidden away as you sat yourself down next to the dozing hero and wiped away as much evidence of your meeting as you could.

“How are you feeling?” you asked quietly, lathing the warm cloth between his legs and softening length.

“Good, all things considered,” he responded, voice returned to it’s normal, deep baritone.

“I sincerely hope you won’t have to do much sitting tomorrow,” you quipped and it earned you a chuckle.

“I’ll manage.”

You rolled him gently and finished clearing the rest of his spend from the flat expanse of his stomach. Toshi mumbled his thanks and you gave his thigh a friendly squeeze before retreating from the room to shower and change yourself.

He’d be gone by the time you got out, notification of payment on your phone and a sizable tip left on your dresser as a parting gift.

And as long as Yagi Toshinori was just as good a boy on the outside as he was here, then the world would never need to know what their Symbol of Peace got up behind your closed doors.

***

“All Might! Mister All Might, sir!”

The grating voice of that shithead reporter echoed through the speakers of your headphones over and over again. Your hand shook as the train stuttered to a halt and a wave of passengers burst out onto the platform.

“All Might, are the rumors true!?”

Your stomach sank as the reporter shouted your name above the ruckus of microphones and camera flashes and roaring bodies. Their voice was like chalk on your tongue, dry and cracked and clamoring to know whether the Symbol of Peace was involved with the recently revealed ‘seedy’ and ‘scandalous’ sex ring between yourself and multiple top ranking heroes.

You’d been out having a relaxing lunch with friends in the city when everyone’s phones blew up. It wasn’t that you hid the general details of your job, but by the looks on their faces were enough to make your face burn. The judgement was clear—what you did was abhorrent, disgusting and by extension, so were you. Reporters had caught you on camera with a certain second ranking pro and very quickly deduced exactly who you were and what services you offered.

The tabloids took it and ran, dragging your reputation behind them.

Call after call and text, dms on your social media pages, all from news outlets requesting interviews or quotes or hero fans calling you a ‘shameless whore’ for going after pros—hell death threats had even begun to fill your inboxes.

Hero fans really were ride or die, you supposed, although the ‘die’ in that scenario seemed to refer more to you than themselves. They would never believe their precious big boy crush had ever associated with the likes of you, had ever willingly kneeled for you—had ever enjoyed it.

They couldn’t understand the things you did, all they saw was some false emasculation.

And if it came out that Toshinori had any contact with you, his career would be ruined.

You had hoped from the little you’d learned about him in your sessions, that he’d simply deny knowing you existed at all. That he’d have mercy on you, treat you like the thousand helpless civilians he pulled from burning buildings or whatever the hell heroes did these days.

But you’d been right before to say that you didn’t know Toshi.

And now you certainly didn’t like him either.

“Are you one of the pros involved?” the reporter hounded again as All Might’s massive form panned into frame.

“As your Symbol of Peace, I certainly do not partake in such degenerate behavior,” his words rang out, deep and resonating. “I would never associate with someone who’s actions border on criminal.”

The dark, soulless pits he called eyes stared mockingly from your tiny screen as his signature laugh reverberated through your ears along with the train’s clacking breaks. You ripped the headphones from your ears and closed out of the app, ducking your head and pushing towards the door. Everyone’s eyes were drilling into you, worming deep under your skin and making you squirm like so many of those heroes had done on your silk sheets.

Rationally, you were aware not many people would have seen the story yet. Tabloid trash took a day or two to disseminate into the general social media outlets and for people to take notice. Your friends only knew because your name stuck out to them, but you were hardly recognizable in your typical citizen attire. Even still.

Your life, your work, all of it was on display.

And he’d called you a degenerate.

The infallible All Might had taken your name and tossed it in the guttered, likened you to a villain and single handedly destroyed everything you’d built in the process.

Years of effort and crawling your way up the ranks of society all for nothing.

All so some washed up hero could keep his fantasy of success going for just a little longer. Toshi trusted you with his secrets, his weakness, his body, and you’d defended that at every turn. The only thing he had to do was pay a small fee for your time and discretion.

But no amount of money could fix your toppled character. Nothing could reverse your place as a disgusting slut in the eyes of literal millions of people.

Bold of Yagi Toshinori to underestimate you so thoroughly, to think that you’d sit back in the rubble as he rescued cats and little kids and lived his delusion of perfection.

This was about trust and power.

When those lines were crossed, that’s when things got messy.

And you’d make sure to leave so big a mess, Toshi would never dream of coming back from it.

***

Your apartment building was thankfully free of any press when you arrived home. It had been a few days since All Might instigated your public slander, but the mass media hadn’t managed to track you down after you went into a short period of hiding.

You needed time to let all your other clients involved in the scandal play their cards.

There would be no use in condemning one just to have them warn the rest of their equally impending doom. That way you could be assured they’d all come crashing down with you. Especially the blonde poster boy of hero society himself.

His would be the sweetest fall.

It had been long enough now that you could start compiling. You locked the door behind you, shrugging off your coat and settling on the couch. The plush cushions sank as you fell back, pulling out your phone and scrolling through your contacts. Toshi was there, two red and blue hearts on either side of his name. You pulled up his text thread.

You’d thought about going public of course.

Of course you had.

Your entire career had been trashed, you’d been shamed by the number one hero himself and your personal life was blasted over social media.

But you were human, so you were weak.

And you had liked Toshi.

Well, you hated him now—a deeply dark, burning resentment—but before that, he’d been so sweet to you in a way that most were not. Respectful and nice and you were unused to it. So, you couldn’t quite bring yourself to eradicate his credibility in the same outright manner.

No, you had decided you’d give him a chance.

Because you were better than him.

A chance to atone, come clean, apologize the way you’re sure he would if his public image wasn’t so goddamn important to him. So you didn’t reach out to any of the media outlets that had been hounding your socials for the past week, and didn't offer them the inside scoop quite yet. Instead, you stared at the handsome contact photo of your hero client and slowly typed him up a message he couldn’t ignore.

It was short and sweet, polite but firm. You acknowledged he most certainly did not want to speak with you—in fact, you weren’t very inclined to speak with him ever again either—but you happened to be in possession of some fairly compromising photographic evidence of your time together. And if that evidence were ever to, say, end up in the pocket of the exact scandal rag that sent voice clips of All Might all but denouncing you as a whore to the nation, well. Things would certainly not end well for him.

But, you were nothing if not professional.

He knew that.

You never wanted to use these, but he had forced your hand. Of course you were more than willing to work out a deal with him.

He was your favorite client after all.

In any case, he knew how to reach you, and he had a generous 48 hours to give you an answer to your proposition.

Oh and you were kind enough to provide a little snapshot of just exactly the type of evidence you meant.

Your thumb hovered over the little blue arrow to send. The phone clacked against your nails as it shook in your grip, slick from sweat and frayed nerves. You couldn’t quite tell if you were anxious or angry or some awful combination of the two, but your heart was in your throat as you shut your eyes and pressed send.

There was no going back, and if this all came tumbling to the ground, you promised yourself that you would shatter gracefully.

Letting the screen go dim, you stared in silence at the small check mark confirming the message had been delivered and your fate sealed. You pulled yourself to your feet and made your way to the bedroom.

He’d get back to you soon, or maybe he wouldn’t. You couldn’t know for sure whether or not Toshi would simply ignore your texts and be blindsided when the deadline passed and you destroyed him all over again in a far less enjoyable manner than you used to. But whatever the case, it was out of your hands for now.

With aching feet and tired eyes, you stripped slowly and stumbled towards the bathroom. Turning the water to just below scalding, you did your best to scrub away any pesky remaining guilt that clung to you in a thin, suffocating film.

You told yourself that there was no other choice. That you would have found another way if there was one. That this was how business often went. You had seen it before when you first entered in the field of sex work and you’d see it again. So you scrubbed yourself raw and let all your doubts trickle down the drain.

Tonight, you would sleep restlessly, but it was a fair enough burden to carry for your honor.

You were foolish to believe the cost of revenge wouldn’t bear a heftier price.

***

You woke slowly, trapped momentarily in the strange limbo between sleep and consciousness that fooled you into thinking the strange tightness at your wrists was nothing more than a leftover side effect of a dream.

The reality was so much worse.

It wasn’t until you felt the blunt, radiating sting of knuckles backhanded against your cheek that the haze of sleep fell away, and you could truly appreciate the scene before you.

Which was to say, you could take the opportunity to scream before Yagi Toshinori’s fingers were shoved down your throat to muffle the noise. He was large, shirt seams full to bursting, and sporting an expression you’d never seen before. His eyes, while always dark, were like holes now and they filled you with an unfamiliar sense of dread.

He’d called you a villain before, and now he was looking at you like one too.

“Oh no,” Toshi hissed. His voice was impossibly deep, reverberating against your ribs painfully, “I don’t want to hear anything out of you.”

One quick bout of struggling made it very apparent he didn’t want you moving either as your wrists had been bound behind your back and your ankles were similarly immobilized. The fingers in your mouth pressed hard on your tongue, his thumb pushing below your chin to make you choke and splutter.

“You really let all that power get to your head, didn’t you?” Toshi’s voice was buzzing in your ears and mingling with the pain in your jaw. He put one massive knee on the mattress and hooked his fingers behind your teeth, forcing you to sit up from the bed.

You could feel your face burn as he looked down at you, drool slipping passed your lips and coating his fingers. The straining bulge in his pants looked even bigger than you remembered now that he was no longer the slip of a man you’d come to know as Yagi Toshinori.

No this was All Might, the Symbol of Peace.

And you got the feeling that whatever was about to happen, it was not going to be peaceful for you.

He had you tied and trussed like a piece of meat, and he would treat you like one. You’d seen this before, you’d tied these knots—he’d been where you were now, but he’d asked for it. The loss of control was never something you’d delighted in on a good day, and now the rising pressure in your chest and the sensation of walls closing had panic coursing through you.

“Did you really think that I’d come back here willing to grovel at your feet?” he jeered, the trademark smile on his face more snarl than grin.

He shook your jaw violently in his grasp, listening to the joints pop as they tried to stretch around his thick fingers. Your name left his mouth in a mock coo, just as you had done to him so many nights before. “Remember, you might get to call me a bitch but it’s only because I let you.”

Your hands trembled violently against the bonds which tore the delicate skin and rubbed it raw. Toshi’s free hand traveled along his thigh to rub himself through his pants, his knuckles brushing your nose as he bucked into his palm.

“But now you’ve stepped out of line,” he mused and clicked his tongue as though you were a student who’d done poorly on his latest exam. “And I’m going to make sure that whore mouth of yours never utters my fucking name again.”

Eyes wide with horror, you watched as Toshi’s fingers fumbled with the button and zipper of his slacks until his cock had sprung free, monstrous in length and girth, dripping onto your forehead.

You’d seen it before, but it seemed bigger now. So big that you’d never been able to take it, and Toshi had been staunchly against you ever trying lest he quite literally split you in two. But any kindness he’d shown you before was clearly off the table. His fingers pumped in and out of your throat as if preparing you somehow to take the stretch. It wouldn’t help. You knew that. He knew that.

Toshinori smiled as he removed his fingers in favor of digging the spit slicked digits into the joints of your jaw, ensuring you wouldn’t bite down on him as he pressed the spongy tip to your lips. The panic that had set in—making your blood rush and your limbs shake—was constricting your chest and the pressure of Toshi’s dick pushing past your teeth made your breathing even more erratic.

You whimpered loudly, trying to wrench your head away as the strong salt and musk flavor of his pre cum spread across your tongue, but that only made him thrust forward harder. His length quickly hit resistance back of your throat as you gagged and tears burned at the corners of your eyes.

The ache in your jaw was already unbearable and your bottom lip was being rubbed raw by warm spit and the friction of Toshi roughly fighting to sink his dick fully into your mouth.

“Mm, that’s it,” he groaned as you inadvertently licked over his tip, trying to force him away. “You look so much better like this.”

He ran a falsely sweet hand across your cheek, collecting the stream of tears and using the moisture to slick the rest of his length. Your chest heaved in a mixture of gags and increasingly violent sobbing. You were stretched painfully wide as he rolled his hips again, pushing the thickest bit of his cock into your mouth and forcing your teeth to dig painfully into your upper lip. With the next thrust, he was able to sink another excruciating inch deep into your throat. Blood rushed from where you bit yourself and caused crimson streaks to form as Toshi fucked slowly into your mouth.

Your mind was slipping.

You’d had so little time to process the encounter, so instead your brain had secluded most of your consciousness into a precious little box, away from the intense burning in your throat as Toshi finally sank all of his innumerable inches completely into you. Your throat bulged and protested, tightening in an attempt to force him out.

It only made him moan loudly and dig his fingers into your hair.

“See?” he huffed, pulling out at an agonizing pace only to ram his length in roughly to the hilt. “I’d never lie to my public, you really are just as much of a slut as they say you are.”

You shrieked around his cock, though it was muffled so badly by the lack of air and the wet slap of his constant thrusting that no one but you could hear the screaming in your own head. The pain was unbearable, this awful friction burning sensation that had your stomach churning and your chest wracked with stifled cries. Your bound legs kicked and your fingers grasped useless at the sheets as Toshi fucked your mouth reckless abandon.

Time blurred along with your vision, whether from the lack of oxygen or the tears you weren’t sure.

And most horrifyingly of all, was the pleasure that grew as your mind drowned the pain in darkness. You felt as though you were floating, disgusted but euphoric and the slide of him against your lips became delicious. Heat rose in you and built between your legs accompanied by a distant and unfamiliar ache to please, to be touched, to taste him, to obey.

You wondered if this was how he felt when you forced his mouth on you. If he slid into this strange space where your mind was a separate entity and the only thing that mattered was the pain and the pleasure and the release.

Because somehow, in the midst of your struggle and revulsion, he’d made this strange, incorporeal part of you enjoy this.

All the fight had drained out of you, letting your jaw hang slack and your tongue flick up to catch his tip on every backstroke. Your eyes flitted up to look at him through the haze of tears and sweat, hoping strangely that he’d be pleased with you. And the groan you earned yourself was delectable.

You gave in, then. Let yourself be swept away by the rushing of blood in your ears and the rhythm of Toshi tearing you apart.

At some point, you could distantly feel his thrusts becoming more erratic, turning into a rough grinding in your mouth.

You couldn’t even taste it when he came, his cock was too obscenely deep in your neck, but the warmth of it burned your bleeding throat and filled your belly with a hot finality.

You weren’t even afforded the dignity of spitting his seed onto the floor where it belonged, ignoring the searing voice in your head that revealed in being rewarded with his essence.

When Toshi finally pulled out and tucked himself away, your head fell limply to your chest. A series of violent coughs erupted from you as a thick, viscous mixture of blood and spit and cum dripped from your tongue.

Those impossibly large hands gripped your chin once again, forcing you to look up into those piercing black eyes.

“Now, you’re never going to speak about me again,” he wasn’t asking but you glared up at him as his hand fumbled in his pocket, pulling out his phone.

The device was comically small in those hands of his as he aimed it at your ruined face and snapped a picture—the flash blinding you while he reached around and roughly undid the knotted rope keeping you in place.

“Because if you do, I’ll make sure those reporters know everything I said about you was nothing but the truth.”

The loudest part of you wanted to scream, to punch and bite and tell him it wasn’t. That you were a professional, with self-respect and dignity and you were good and your job, but—

But when you opened your sore and aching jaw to shout, nothing came out.

No sound, no yell, no words.

Just this awful rasp that made your throat feel like pins were sticking into the abused flesh.

“Well, looks like I might not need this after all,” Toshi dangled the phone in front of your face before pocketing it once again. “Looks like you won’t be saying much of anything for a good long while.”

And then Yagi Toshinori left.

He turned on his heel and walked out as you toppled off the bed behind him, trying so hard to scream despite the pain and the ripping in your chest—whether they were curses or cries for him to stay, you weren’t sure.

But there was nothing either way.

So you sat and screamed in silent agony at his retreating form until the sound of a door slamming rang out through your home.

It seemed that in all your years of playing this game, you’d finally been toppled off your tightrope.

Because you were good at your job, so you knew. It was all about the exchange of power, and yours had just been thoroughly stripped away.

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