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creativia10 · 3 years ago

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I would Duel for you

Virgil has fantasies about how the final battle with his brother could have gone differently to satisfy his thirst for revenge, and wish to physically make up for what his brother put Roman through. At least one of these can become a reality.

Pairing: Virgil x Roman

Wordcount: 2528

Warnings: Suggestive Themes, implies past abusive relationship, mentions past unsympathetic Deceit

Notes: This is a coda/fanfic of @tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors 's Love ad Other Fairytales series. This is set some time after the main story, during the first year after. I am also posting this on my ao3, where I will have a longer AN and tags. Also note, I put this as M on my ao3. This is my first time writing a fic like this. I hope I am tagging this right.

Virgil wouldn’t change how they saved everyone from his brother. He was proud that Roman was able to be the hero he had always wanted to. So proud of his brave knight to have been able to get the ring from his brother, knowing how difficult that must have been. However, the more romantic, possessive, and fae parts of him would imagine things going differently. More specifically, the primal urge that came to the front when he thought about what his brother did with Roman. It was bad enough knowing his brother was had been with Roman first, but Roman had found Virgil first. Stupid curse.

So, ever since Roman first told them about his deal with the Serpent King, many images came to his mind on how he wanted to fix it.

Going back and forth between, murder the snake, he is mine, how dare that snake take another of mine, how dare he hurt someone as amazing and lovely as him.

In a way, he did get what he wanted. The Serpent King was killed. Greta was most justified to do the job than any of them. Yet, there were times he wished he could have dealt with the situation more personally. Maybe some sort of snarling speech, that was a bit of an embarrassing wish though. He did not like talking in front of crowds, which sucked when you ruled the entire magical forest.

It would go something like this,

His brother had just manhandled Roman onto his spot on the armrest of the throne. His hand going to that possessive grip on the back of Roman’s neck.

A guttural growl came from Virgil.

“ Get. Your. F***ing hands. Off of Him!”

His brother would just give him a smug look.

“I don’t think you’re in a place to be making demands right now. You can’t even get to him.”

Virgil didn’t always picture the details of how he made it over there, just that he did.

Then, Virgil and his brother were squaring up on the battlefield, Roman kept behind the snake.

A grand magical duel would take place,

or sometimes a bloody vicious battle, depending on how homicidal of a mood Virgil was in when he pictured it. The point was, he usually fought his brother directly, for Roman. Sometimes he demanded Roman be released to him first. Sometimes, Virgil immediately went for the kill, unforgiving of his brother for what he did to his love.

Virgil would go over to Roman immediately after. Usually he would just hold him tightly and warmly. Roman would say something. It wasn’t always the same. Usually of gratitude. Most of the time, Virgil spoke first, as Roman was speechless, having trouble comprehending that he truly was free. Virgil always would, and he still did, have the urge to do whatever he could to just make it better. There was usually a kiss. One with a lot of gentle caressing. The kiss was usually passionate. Sometimes interspersed with sweet continuous expressions of, “I love you’s”. Sometimes Virgil muttered more heated and possessive things, that were still warm. Sometimes they were on the seductive side, of asking how he could physically erase his brother’s horrid touch, wanting to bring Roman so much pleasure he couldn’t think about whatever the stupid snake had done first. Because Virgil loved him, and intimacy would always be better when there was real love.

Sometimes, in a moment of passion, Virgil would dive in for a passionate kiss first, but usually something would be said, and some loving touching would take place before the kissing. Sometimes he would keep going where the kissing escalated to them getting frisky against a tree, but usually Virgil would try to keep his mind from going that far.

The main thing, was Virgil would mutter promises that Roman would never have to deal with his brother’s cruel hand again. Virgil was pretty sure Roman knew that though.

“Virgil?” Virgil blinked from his reverie as he turned to the speaker.

He always wished he could do more. He knew that recovering from stuff was something he couldn’t just fight away. But gosh did he wish he could. He wanted to make up for every moment that bastard took from them.

Part of him felt guilty about some of his daydreams, as he knew Roman was not ready for the more physical parts of a relationship. Virgil would never want him to feel pressure or rushed though, not after what his brother did to his beloved.

“Virgil are you ok?”

Virgil smiled a little at Patton, uncertain how he could respond, because he didn’t know.

“I was just thinking,” He said. Patton frowned at the non-answer, but nodded hesitantly.

“Okaay…well good luck on your checkup!”

“Pat…” Logan said with an exasperated look. “That makes it sound like he’s going to a doctor.”

“Well, I mean he is checking up on his mom though! So I technically wasn’t wrong.”

Logan rolled his eyes and held Patton’s hand.

“See you later.”

Since Roman had insisted on joining Virgil as he checked on the status of the forest, Patton and Logan had decided to make a date out of it. They all waved bye, and Virgil turned to face the forest. He couldn’t seem to help thinking of his imagines upon realizing this would be his first time alone with Roman since the defeat of the Serpent King, and since the four’s relationship came to be.

Roman stood up beside him, with a smile.

“Ready?” He was dressed in what Virgil believed used to be his ‘hunting’ getup, an iron blade in its sheath. Virgil rolled his eyes.

“Yes. Remember to stick close to me.”

Roman huffed, but surprisingly didn’t protest as they started off. Virgil was finding himself…distracted. In many ways though. They were here to check on the forest, but Virgil’s focus kept going to Roman. His wonderful knight. Actually there with him, while they were both awake. How wonderful he was. Then frustration that by thinking about that, he was distracted from being in the moment with Roman, along with other ‘new relationship’ anxieties. Also, as his thoughts often led back to, just how much he had lost with Roman because of his stupid brother. Being alone with Roman brought some of these urges to his forefront even more.

He could see them on the battlefield. Somehow, the serpent was frozen in place, he hadn’t put thought into how, daydreams didn’t always make sense. He was kissing Roman passionately and possessively, to show that fiend did not have him anymore, that-

“V?”

Virgil blinked, and turned to Roman, who was giving him a concerned look.

“Are you alright? You seemed a bit spacey there.”

Virgil looked away again, thinking of what he could say.

“…I have stated that my communing with my mother does not look the same to onlookers.”

“…okay, I know avoiding an answer when I hear one, V.”

He slipped his hand into Virgil’s and interlaced their fingers. His hand was so warm. It felt so nice. Another thing he absolutely adored about his love. He just wanted to caress it, and maybe pull him into a passionate embrace where he could-

Virgil took in a sharp inhale, trying not to squeeze Roman’s hand too hard. The last thing he wanted was to hurt or scare him. Roman was still looking at him, brows furrowed.

“Hey. What is it?” He stopped.

“We probably shouldn’t just stop here in the middle of the forest.”

Roman half smiled and walked closer to him, holding Virgil’s other hand as well.

“I am here, with the prince of the forest. I am sure we’re okay.”

Damn right, he thought in response to that.

Virgil smiled at him, sure the awe was clear on his face. Virgil brought their hands up so he could gently cup Roman’s face, and pressed their foreheads together and closed his eyes. He let out a relieved sigh at feeling his love’s touch.

“It might seem silly,” he finally admitted.

Roman laughed a little at that, then Virgil felt him nuzzle their noses together.

“I am sure I won’t mind, my spidery princeling. Especially when you are acting so vulnerable about it.” He leaned forward quickly to peck Virgil then back. Virgil almost followed his lips then stopped himself. He wanted to at least let Roman know what had been playing through his mind before he found himself go any further. He was still hesitant though.

“…also might reference a topic you may not want to talk about.” He heard a sharp inhale from Roman, so he started to pull away and opened his eyes. Roman squeezed Virgil’s hands before he could let go.

“How about you start…and I’ll let you know if I can’t right now, okay?”

Virgil hesitated but nodded.

“Okay, so” He took a breath. “Since…the Serpent King’s defeat-“

Virgil didn’t miss Roman’s wince at the mention, but he didn’t protest,

“Or, well really since you first mentioned the deal he wrapped you up in, I have been…sort of fantasizing about ways I could fix it.” Roman gave him a confused look. Virgil sighed.

“I find myself…picturing I got to deal with him personally…and then doing my best to erase whatever way he might have touched you…by compensating with my own touch,” Virgil looked back up at him, not wanting to scare him, but unable to help the intensity of his stare. Even mentioning the fantasies out loud, had Virgil having to restrain a growl. Roman inhaled, but he didn’t seem scared.

“O-oh?” Roman asked. Virgil nodded.

“I am sure you have caught on to how fae can be possessive. And I would never force you into anything of course, unlike my brother. Him being the one to do what he did to you, made it more personal for me.” With as much restraint as he could, Virgil shakily put a hand up to cup Roman’s face again.

“I had been waiting for you,” He sounded a little watery as he spoke, but he kept going, “You are the main one who kept me from being lonely during my slumber. If I could do anything I could to erase any pain you may have gone through…know that I would.”

Roman took a shaky breath, his eyes starting to look a little shiny.

“Okay.” Roman simply said. He brought their hands to his lips and gently kissed them.

He looked back up at Virgil and smiled a little shakily.

“I gotta say…I love hearing how much you want to be with me, my love.” He dropped their hands and looked back at him.

“Can I ask…how would you make it up to me? What are you wanting to do?”

Virgil’s eyes widened at that, unable to restrain his growl that time.

“Are you wanting me to show you?”

Roman smiled a little, blushing, and then nodded.

“You know how I love to be pampered,” He said.

Virgil smirked, and then slowly started to back Roman until he was against a tree.

“Remember, tell me at any time if there is anything you don’t want, okay?”

Roman nodded, biting his lip a little. Virgil’s eyes zeroed in on that. He moved his hands to grip Roman’s waist, and leaned in.

“Where?” He asked, figuring Roman knew what he was asking, but hoping it wouldn’t be too much.

Roman thought for a moment, then lifted a wrist up to Virgil. Virgil grasped his hand, and leaned his hips forward so Roman was still pinned to the tree, getting a gasp out of Roman, and looked over the wrist. Then he leaned forward and kissed the wrist, looking at Roman as he did so.

He flicked his tongue against it, mouthed at the spot, and gently grazed his teeth against it. Another breathy sound from Roman. Virgil smiled at him, glad to see the lack of fear from Roman’s face, exactly what he was going for. He asked him again with his eyes. Roman slowly nodded and then tilted his head. Immediately, Virgil sprung forward and attached his lips to that spot on the junction of Roman’s neck. It was a good spot. Virgil got a lovely moan from that one. His hands, back on Roman’s hips, was brushing his thumb back and forth, alternating with how he would squeeze them. Then both pressed against each other, trying to feel as much of the other as they could.

Roman ran his hands up and down Virgil’s sides, and twirled them in his hair some.

Virgil enthusiastically kissed up Roman’s neck, until their lips were a mere breath apart, and he didn’t know who pushed forward first, but then they were kissing. It got passionate immediately, alternating from loving touches to erotic ones. He wanted to feel him as much as he possibly could.

He put a lot of force into his kiss, but made sure to keep the pace of the kiss with how Roman was pushing forward, not wanting to get too rough. Lips gripped. Virgil bit Roman’s lips getting a particularly loud moan out of him, which made Virgil shiver. He absolutely loved being able to get Roman like this. This was how it was supposed to be for him. He was the one to get him to feel like this. Virgil licked over Roman’s lips and then flicked his tongue into Roman’s mouth, as they toyed with each other. It was wonderful, and Virgil felt some tension he had been feeling get released.

Virgil thinks he may have been muttering I love yous in between.

He pulled away barely, just to kiss all around Roman’s face, who was breathing very heavily, already slumping against the tree.

Virgil pulled away to look at him, his blood thrumming.

“I cannot wait for the day we can physically become one,” He said, as he pushed a lock of hair behind Roman’s head. Roman was still panting but he smiled up at him.

“Me too.”

Virgil helped him up and strung his arm around the back of his shoulders to keep him upright.

“Perhaps we should continue the forest checking when I am a bit more focused.” Virgil said.

Roman snorted at that, and leaned his head against Virgil’s.

“Yeah, probably would be best. Cuddles?”

“Of course my love,” and he kissed the top of Roman’s head before they headed back, Roman a little shaky on his feet.

“Should I carry you back?”

Roman blushed and didn’t say anything.

“Is that a yes?”

Roman sighed, “I am just thinking about whatever comments Mamaw may give.”

Virgil shrugged, and quickly lifted him into a bridal carry, causing Roman to yelp and blush more.

“I can always put you down before we get to the house?”

Roman didn’t respond. Virgil smiled and started walking back.

“…do you seriously intend to carry me like this the entire time?”

“It’s not taxing for me. Let me feel like I rescue the dame in distress for once.”

“What do you mean for once? Virgiil~.”

Virgil laughed as they made their way back. Maybe some good did come out of his daydreams after all.

#laoft fic #ts sanders sides #sanders sides fanfic #ts virgil #ts roman #prinxiety #unsympathetic deceit

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translationandbetrayals · 2 years ago

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Oyasumi Punpun: a personal view on one of the best things I've ever read.

As a child, before I became a teenager, I used to love searching for mangas and trying to copy the beautiful drawings that I saw on each page. When I grew up I started to occupy my time on other things and I forgot about my whole fascination for manga, as I got closer to western comics (Watchmen being my all time favorite).

Then, two years ago, when I was locked inside my house during the forced quarantine that the whole world had to experiencie, I found out about Oyasumi Punpun. I know there are a lot of posts about this manga, maybe with the same ideas that I'm going to talk about, but I believe that it is a creation that doesn't leave people indifferent.

Melancholy is portrayed accurately in a lot of works from different areas: arts, music, literature, psychology, performance, movies, and of course, manga and anime. This feeling of a void inside of our souls is universal: eastern and western cultures approach it in their own ways, but sometimes they can create a portrait that is so truthful that it can haunt its audience.

So, what makes Punpun so popular?what makes this manga a touching experience to the reader?and why do I consider Inio Asano's most known story to be the best manga that I've read so far? we'll dive into that in the next lines.

To start, I'll talk about the story and the events in a little summary that doesn't pretend to tell each detail (we have Wikipedia for that, don't we?). Maybe you've been asking to yourself whether if reading Oyasumi Punpun is a good idea or not. Of course I encourage you to read it, but it might be a little too graphic or heavy for some people (which is totally OK, because this is a dense content).

We start off with Punpun Punyama, a little bird that lives with his parents and is their only child. Punpun seems to have a "normal" life: he is very innocent, and he is not capable, in a certain way, to see the dark side of his life. He is not aware of the problems that his parents have: the weird personality of his mom, or the alcoholism and violence problems of his dad. His uncle himself has a story with depression and different struggles that are revealed later in the other volumes.

On his first day of school, we are shown that he is "in love" with a girl who is a bully, but at the same time is very popular among her classmates. That day, the teacher announces that she is moving away from the school, but one of the most important moments in the manga happens here: Aiko, a new girl, appears in the classroom as a new student that comes from another city. In the first volume we are introduced to different side stories that can be considered fun but at the same time are a little serious: for example, Aiko's "mother" works at selling some type of magic water, which embarasses Aiko, only to be discovered by Punpun and his uncle, who confronts the lady. Punpun discovers pornography and starts to fantasize about different scenarios with Aiko, because he falls in love with her and they start a cute "relationship" together, having their first kiss or having a lot of different conversations.

Punpun friends seem like really normal kids: Shimi, for example, is the typical kind of a boy that is kind of clumsy, in counterpart of Seki, his best friend, who is very independent and knows a lot for his age. Harumi is the one who leads the group in a certain way: he is a good-willed kid, after all, and he appears later on the manga in crucial moments. Sachi, a character that appears later, is a teenager that goes to an abandoned factory to draw, the exact same place where the group of children go out to play and search for ghosts. As everything happens, we see the toxic origins of Punpun's relationship with Aiko: it starts with a lot of small lies and threats, and it only gets worse through time. Punpun, after receiving a telescope from his father as a gift, decides that he's going to be a space scientist, to discover a new planet and save his love interest.

After promising Aiko to join her in her plan to escape from home, Punpun realises that he is not ready for this kind of commitement, and leaves her standing in the place they agreed to reunite some time ago. In this part of the manga, we see how Punpun's father ends up going to jail for beating his wife, sending his mom to the hospital and wishing she never had Punpun, how Punpun's last name changes from Punyama to Onodera, or how the uncle relies on his bitter way of seeing life. Also, a conspiracy is shown as another side story: a man called Toshiki Hoshikawa starts his own sect, which will be very important in the future events within the years.

With all of these scenes we have a base for what will come next: we can consider this manga as a "coming of age" story, that shows us how much everything can change with time: Punpun starts to grow up, being an adolescent at first, then a young adult and finally an adult without any life expectances. Death surrounds some characters too, and each time we look at this work, we have to consider that suicide is always a part of it (even as a controversial topic). We start with a story that seems cute, and has beautiful pannels, a very good construction of its characters and even funny moments... but all of this starts to drive us to a point when we will inevitably connect way too much, then end up crying or just thinking about life in a more philosophical way. A lot of the dialogues are intended to show different points of view, depending of each character.

Asides from the art, which is a treasure on its on way, we get a portrait of depression at its best. That's why it might be triggering for people who suffer from depression: because sometimes it dwells in our own wounds. The sensations that some chapters of the Manga give are "silent": they give this impression of total desolation and disability, being at times devastating. Some parts of the story occur as "plot twists" and the story doesn't get predictable: it creates its own paths, it resembles different pictures of melancholy. For example, the explicit sexual parts are never intended to be "erotic": they always leave this strange feeling of disgust, or sadness. Violence is present too, and we see Punpun turning into a complete mess, changing (metaphorically) the shape of his head, which we will never see as a human.

Characters as Aiko live an existence that is full of hidden misery: in fact, Aiko is some kind of a paradox, because she is beautiful but her life is terrible, only to become worse when Punpun appears in the picture. Sachi, in other hand, is perhaps the most mature character: she is fully dedicated to her job, but she feels like she needs to save Punpun so she sticks to him in every way possible, and even saves him. We see how Punpun's close circle of people affect each of his actions, and we see how Punpun's choices affect others too.

Now, talking about my personal experience, I feel like this manga is one of those pieces that create some sort of a "new" self: I feel like there was one Mikami before I read Oyasumi Punpun, and when I finished it I was another person. Maybe because I got so in touch with a lot of experiences from my own life, in aspects that are so different: despising life at some times, family issues, toxic relationships and the importance of friends. Not everything was bad, anyways, I had a good time reading it and I feel like I was more conscious of things as I analyzed it, but it hurt a lot. It hurt because Aiko and Punpun (the main story) are an example of a toxic couple, and by the time I read this I was just getting out from a relationship that destroyed me because it was based on lies and abandonment. We learn about the destructive power of love, and that was just what I was learning, along with different life depictions, such as the uncertainty of the future, the overwhelming feelings of loneliness or how some things that look like simple coincidences are much more complex and imply the result of our own decisions.

I also feel that you can take everything differently if you experience the manga in another time of your life. I feel like this manga (again, paradoxically) has helped me to see that even when life seems so bad it can be accompanied by beautiful moments and people who are always there, with whom you can always count with. Of course, this is my own interpretation: it was a healing experience from all of the sad things that happened to me last year, and I'm very thankful with myself for having enough concentration to read all of the volumes.

Well, I hope after all of these words you might have imagined what Oyasumi Punpun is about, to help you decide if you feel like it's worth your time or not. If you read it before, I hope you enjoyed reading this (maybe we share some points of view in common, who knows?). Last but not least, I'm very thankful with the people who read all of the things I wrote. Sometimes I feel like these kind of things deserve to be talked about: we must take mental health as a real issue, and maybe if we remove some topics from the "taboo" spectrum we can improve as a society.

By Camila Iglesias.

#Manga #Japan #personalstory #submission

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sageinacage · 3 years ago

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Why I am leaving this blog

This is the truth as of why I'm abandoning my tumblr, @/sageinacage.

CW: swearing/harsher language; mentions of breaking boundaries, sexualization, bondage, non-con/tickle torture, kinks, toxicity, overall rly uncomfortable topics

TLDR at the bottom.

Before I start, I want to say that I’m not talking about everyone in this community. Not everyone is like this, but still a lot of people are, and unfortunately the negatives are louder than the positives.

Having this blog was quite an adventure. It definitely had its ups and downs, but I was quick to notice that it had a majority of downs instead of ups. As of now, I'm dreading being on this page.

I don't feel comfortable here anymore and it's incredibly hard for me to feel any sense of safety in this community, and I honestly feel personally ashamed to be in the MCYT tickle community with the bullshit me and others have seen and experienced.

People go around on anonymous and practically harass creators, I've seen so many rude anons get sent to myself, my friends, and people on my dash. People are also breaking CC's boundaries left and right, and no one will listen to anyone when it's spoken up about. I remember making a post stating that if you send anon hate then DNI, and I lost 4 followers. So disappointing. Actually after I took a screenshot of my boundary/trigger list and posted it, someone sent me an ask and did EXACTLY what was listed in my triggers. It went fully against my boundaries, and it caused me to feel scared whenever I get a notification in my inbox, because I’m scared that somebody is trying to purposely trigger me again; and I shouldn’t have to be on Tumblr with such paranoia as I’m experiencing.

Going onto the topic of the more weird and uncomfortable side of the community, I also remember I made a post a while ago saying "if you support putting minors in heavy bondage, then unfollow," and I lost 5+ followers. To put it bluntly, that’s fucking disgusting. For those people to admit for putting minors in a borderline NSFW situation, since heavy bondage is quite literally something that only happens in the kink world and there’s nothing wholesome or cute about it, and for them to admit to doing it, is fucking weird. Though, I’m thankful those people got off my blog.

I have literally seen someone post art of c!Ranboo in heavy restraints and it didn’t even look remotely fun or consensual. It was pictured, or at least my friends and I interpreted it, that he was being tickle tortured and it was non-con. Though, it’s to be expected when the art is a dark-lit room with an intense tickle machine with heavy bondage, with a blindfold and what looks he is genuinely struggling. What made me even more uncomfortable is that an adult drew it. Another person wrote a fic of c!Ranboo in a lot of bondage with the sign “tickle toy” attached to him. That’s fucking weird. That’s practically something that never gets condoned in a strictly SFW sense. The sad part is that others and I have seen a lot of this happening around.

I was actually informed that an artist the other day on another MCYT tickle server drew literal non-con tickle art of Technoblade (/srs). I was revolted. The worst part is, some people didn't even have an issue with it and reacted to the image with heart emojis. For someone to draw non-con in a completely SFW server filled with a bunch of minors is creepy and weird. Non-con isn't a fun thing, and so many people, including me, have horrible experiences related to it; and for someone to turn it into a "heehee fun tickle" situation is fucked up. For someone to even fantasize non-con as a tickle fantasy just makes me feel sick. There are a few fics like this I've seen as well, unfortunately.

Related to non-con things, I've actually gotten a request before asking me to write Schlatt literally tickle torturing Tubbo, and multiple asks that are similar to that; even when on my request rules it stated not to ask for things related to that. Anything with the word "torture" in it is not consensual, especially in the context it was in. I’ve probably had to delete around 5–8 asks in total from my inbox that were related to non-con or torturous things, even after I already stated in my rules I do not write that stuff.

Another thing I've seen is romantic-esque things written with CCs and then the creator slaps a "/p" onto it, and all of a sudden it's okay? Ranboo has even stated in a stream that he is uncomfortable with his IRL self being written/drawn cuddling his friends, and I see so many fics and concepts of IRL Ranboo cuddling in some way (which I've spoken out about before, but again, no one listened).

Moving on, I've probably met the most toxic people in this community than any others I've been apart of- and I've been apart of a lot, I've been on Tumblr on different blogs since I was 11. For some reason, so many people love to guilt trip here (both my friends and I have noticed and experienced a bunch of people doing it in this community), and the people who get called out for it avoid apologizing like the plague. A person in this community made me and a few others literally scared to say no and scared to advocate for our boundaries, because of how much we got guilt tripped. And no, no one received an apology. But still, people DEFENDED this person, even though me and other people spoke out and explained how this person hurt us. That’s so fucking upsetting. I automatically don’t feel safe in a community where people willingly associate with a literal manipulator and someone who hurt probably over 10 people in total (/srs).

Another thing I've noticed is that so many people seem entitled to something. For example, when I got practically harassed by anons for my discomforts/triggers, basically trying to squeeze out reasoning. No one needs to explain their boundaries/discomforts to you, and this community doesn't understand that from what I've experienced; after being harassed by multiple people on anonymous multiple times, all of which were because of personal reasons I was not obligated to share. No one should be able to say that they got harassed by people on anon for their OWN BOUNDARIES. ON 3 DIFFERENT OCCASIONS AS WELL.

Long story short, I can’t help my triggers. Each of my triggers has developed from trauma I’ve gone through or a bad experience, and I shouldn’t even have to defend myself for my triggers/discomforts if people were respectful and weren’t so fucking entitled for an explanation. So many people in this community can’t mind their own business, and I unfortunately had to learn that the hard way.

I've also seen people project onto IRL CCs. Those are real and breathing people. I understand doing it for comfort, but, the CCs have a literal character that people can project onto, but for some reason, people have to push their things onto real life people. I’ve seen someone headcannon IRL Tommy as trans. That's like the same as your friend "headcannoning" you, a real person, as a different sexuality that isn't what you identify with, and one you may not even be OK with being seen as, and without knowing if you're comfortable with it or not. It's weird.

There are more points I could bring up and more specific things I could state, but I think you got the gist of why I'm leaving. I don't feel comfortable being a member in a community which a lot of its members condone in this stuff.

This is the reason why I'm only active in the MCYT tickle community on Discord, because my server, "Mcytickles," actually respects CCs boundaries and is truly an SFW server, and people are respectful towards each other. It's the only safe space I have in this community anymore, so please do not join it if you exhibit any of these things on this post.

No, I will not be coming back, so please do not try to convince me to stay. I’ve been wanting to leave for about a month now, so this isn’t some impulsive decision. I’ve been in the MCYT tickle community since April, and these problems have always existed but have just gotten worse and more extreme, so I’m leaving for my own mental health and to protect myself from further harm than what I’ve already received.

TLDR: I am leaving this blog and the MCYT tickle community on Tumblr due to the many boundary breaking and unacceptable behaviors I've seen be exhibited, and it makes me not feel safe and comfortable to be here anymore.

I want to thank my mutuals, though. You were all awesome and such kind and loving people, and I’m happy to be your guys’ mutual. I want to thank those who were always so nice to me and hyping up my work, and those who were respectful to everyone and advocated for boundaries. Thank you so much for everything, moots <3 (/gen)

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buckys-other-punk · 4 years ago

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Hold on..THIS IS YOU?!

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Request: where she is a fanfic writer and Sebastian stumbles upon her blog and messaged her as well not letting her know who he was but being an open person she is as to who she was, sending pictures and all, and until one day, decides to meet with her and she is surprised that it was the one she was writing for?

Word Count: 3.6K

Warnings: fluff, sarcasm (of course) and cussing? i think that’s all

A/N: Hello my lovelies. I am sorry I haven’t been posting as much, but that’s usually how I roll..no jk I legit had no time to write because of my classes this semester, so if this sucks I’m sorry lol. I’m still trying to get back into my writing groove...Also don’t mind my minor mistakes 😅

A/N 2: Anyways I AM BACK AND this is my first request ever!! I’m so excited to write this, I am soo sorry this took forever, but hope I did your request justice and that you like it (and so do others). I feel like I wrote this kinda cheesy, but whatever.

[Y/B/N = your blog name]

As always lemme know if you wanna be tagged in my future works and feedback is very much appreciated. Enjoy! <3

Just another normal day without stress and a less anxiety filled world...no, today was actually awful. You were swamped with work and your best friend was complaining about her boyfriend. Let’s just say that the stress she was having with him was making you feel happy that you were single. Trying to relax you heated up some coffee (a/n: or tea) and sat on the couch of your small apartment. Grabbing your laptop you wanted to unwind reading. Probably some fanfics on Tumblr usually does the trick.

After reading some pretty good marvel related fics by your mutuals, you got inspired to write some fics yourself. Opening up a new tab you began writing about your favorite actor, Sebastian Stan. That man literally makes your miserable day a little better. Sadly, like all the girls and women who fantasize over him, he doesn’t know you. But, whatever right? You can always use your imagination and conjure up a make believe world where the two of you are happily engaged and have a German Shepard puppy named Stitch. Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you opened another tab on your laptop to pull up your writing playlist, you began typing away on your keyboard writing a new AU where you’re the celebrity of the world you were creating and he was a huge fan of you. After you finished your new fic, you posted that immediately without edits because you were so excited to see people read it.

*across town*

“Have you guys ever read any fanfiction about your characters or yourselves?” the interviewer asked the pair.

“You know I’ve seen a few that were quite impressive. These writers are damn creative.” Anthony replied with a smile. “I will also not lie. I’ve read a few steamy ones and y’all are dirty.” he added with a slight disgusted face shaking his head towards the camera.

“What about you Sebastian? Have you read any?” the interviewer lady asked, looking over to the man.

“Honestly. I haven’t.” Sebastian chuckled looking back at her. “Maybe, if Mackie here finds a good one about me I’ll give it a read.” shrugging towards his friend.

“Oh man, I got a few that are worth reading.” Mackie laughed, rubbing his hands together.

“Hey, might as well share them with the world. Let’s give that writer a shout out!” she exclaimed, placing her notecards on her lap.

“Well, like I’ve said I’ve only read a bit, but I do have some blogs that I’ve saved. Maybe next time I’ll name drop a few and give fans some well deserved praise.” Anthony smiled looking at the two.

“Alright, well you better have a huge list for me.” the lady said with a smile looking at Anthony. “Thank you both again for your time. For everyone watching Falcon and the Winter Soldier comes out in March 2021.” She finished off the interview smiling and waving at the camera and the two men followed her actions as well. Once the cameras and mics were turned off the lady came back to the two men.

“Thank you again guys for your time” the lady said to the pair shaking their hands (a/n: ok let's pretend there is no corona in this world so yeah. Everyone is healthy and so is the world!). The two replied with a simple you’re welcome and another thanks in return.

“Wait, have you really read fanfiction before?” Sebastian asked his co-star as the pair walked towards their manager, who was waiting for them outside the room, getting their schedule for the pair’s next interview.

“I mean yeah. I got curious on what people were writing about us and our characters.” Anthony responded with a shrug looking down at his phone.

“Aren’t most of those like fifty shades of grey?” Sebastian asked, staring at his friend as stood near their manager.

“Only if you want them to be..” Mackie stared at his friend with a blank face as they came to an abrupt stop. “Nah man, I’m just playing. Some of them are steamy, others can be sad, like crazy sad and some are like tooth rotting cute. Like I recently read one that was with Captain America and this original character that the author came up with and it made me say ‘aww’ when I finished it. Me. A grown man said ‘aww’ after reading a fanfic. A FANFIC!” he added. Their manager quickly explained their schedule and walked them over to their car to head off to the next location. The two were seated at the back, while their manager sat next to the driver.

“You know what. Send me that story you read.” Sebastian said to Anthony.

“Are you sure Seb?” Anthony asked with a chuckle.

“Yeah, why not.” he replied with a shrug. “Might as well read a good story before our next interview.”

“Alright let me send it to you right now. Honestly I think this writer is one of my favorites. I don’t know if it's her writing style or how she portrays our characters, but she’s amazing.” Mackie said with a smile getting the fic he recently read and sending it to his friend.

“So all her stories are good?” Sebastian asked, looking at the notification.

“I just said that she is my favorite writer.” Anthony looked at his friend with a ‘are you serious face.’

“Okay. Okay.” Seb said with his arms up in defense. After a few minutes of reading the fanfic Sebastian actually said ‘aww’ aloud just like Mackie after he first read the story.

“It was good wasn’t it.” Anthony asked with a toothy grin.

“Yeah this was really good. Y/B/N is a pretty good writer.” Sebastian said looking through your feed.

“You should tell her!” Anthony exclaimed.

“What, like make an account?” Seb asked.

“Well yeah, but I mean not your actual name of course. Make a fan account. Show these writers your appreciation, I know that if I were an author I would love that (a/n: wink wink). I’ve messaged a few writers complimenting their work without actually telling them who I am.” Anthony said, placing his hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“I’m gonna read more stuff from her before I message her.” Sebastian chuckled. Sebastian clicked onto your main blog page to find that you had just posted a new fic about him. “Wait, dude she just posted a new story...About me!” Sebastian exclaimed, showing his phone to Anthony.

“Nice, but we have to finish these interviews. You gotta read it during your free time man, sorry to crush your dreams.” he chuckled, unbuckling his seat belt and getting out of the car. Sebastian sighed and followed his co-stars actions getting out of the car and continuing the rest of his day filled with interviews.

*later that evening*

After the interviews Anthony and Sebastian had dinner together at a fancy restaurant. During their dinner they talked about how crazy some interviews were. Sebastian brought up the subject of how Mackie publicly announced that he had read fanfiction. With that still stuck in his mind the two finished their meal and after parting ways. Sebastian took a cab and arrived at his apartment, changed out of his fancy suit to some comfy clothes and grabbed a bottle of water from his fridge. He walked over to his couch turning on the tv, not really paying attention to what was playing, grabbing his phone he opened the tumblr app finally creating an account.

*one week later*

Sebastian has read almost all of your works and texting Anthony almost every time after he has finished a new fic giving his reactions to each. He has liked and reblogged everything he has read from you and other writers, but he favors your stuff the most.

Mackie: dude you should tell her you like her stuff and stop texting me!

Seb: Alright I will, I just don't know what to say.

Mackie: Just say you like her work. It's as simple as that.

Seb: okay okay I will

Mackie: ok good, no stop texting my its legit 2 am

Seb: fine

Sebastian opened up the messaging area of the app and began typing away his appreciation to you. He didn’t know why he felt so nervous after he pressed send. Getting out of the app completely he tried to focus on whatever was playing on the tv. Then all of a sudden he heard a notification go off and his phone light up. Looking down on it he saw that it was a notification from you. Again his nervousness took place as he unlocked his phone to read the notification. The app opened and the direct message filled his phone screen.

(a/n: this is my first time using a fake dm thingy so just imagine that Seb is following you)

Seb: Holy shit dude, she actually replied back to me!

Mackie: Well of course she did, she's not a robot. But maybe she is since she’s up so late...

Seb: shut up and why are you still up? I though you were mad at me for texting you

Mackie: well you woke me up so what am i supposed to do

Seb: whatever I’ll let you go

Mackie: alright. bye lover boy

Sebastian shook his head at the text, he went back to the app to reply back to you. “What should I say?” he said to himself. “Maybe she’s in a different time zone or lives across the world or something… Okay okay. Maybe be chill and say I hope i didn’t wake you? No that sounds weird.” he shook his head trying to come up with something to say. Eventually he fell asleep trying to think of what to say to you.

*the next morning/later that day*

Sebastian woke up with his phone gone from his hand. He quickly got out of his bed in panic to look for it. Maybe you had said something to him or he had said something dumb to you. Once he found his phone he quickly unlocked it to check and thank god he didn’t say anything stupid. But he didn’t say anything. He shook his head clearing his thoughts. “Alright I think I know what to say.”

Y/N’s POV

You woke up to the sound of cars honking, groaning you looked at your clock. “How is it already 10 am?” you said aloud to nobody in particular. You sat up on your bed and grabbed your phone scrolling through various social media apps. At the top of your screen you saw a notification from tumblr. Opening the app to the notifications section, you noticed it was a blog that had messaged you from earlier in the morning.

sebstan_fan: Nice to meet you Y/N. I’m Carter. I don’t know where you live, but I just woke up and had a dream about one of your fics. (wow I hope that didn’t sound creepy)

You smiled at the message, since you loved interacting with your followers.

y/b/n: haha its ok. I actually live near New York City and I also woke up. What was your dream about? (if i can ask)

Sebastian’s POV

Sebastian had just finished taking a shower and began preparing his late breakfast. “Holy shit she replied again!” he said to himself looking at the message.

sebstan_fan: Wait, you live near NYC! Me too! Wow such a small world. But anyways my dream was honestly just a reenactment of your fic.

y/b/n: that’s so crazy how we live near each other lol. But that's so cool how you dreamt about my work. You must have really liked it.

sebstan_fan: yeah it was really interesting how you wrote such a life like scenario.

y/b/n: thank you Carter <3

sebstan_fan: ok I now this is random, but what’s your favorite place to eat in New York?

y/b/n: ooh that’s tough. Let’s go with Lombardi’s since its the very first pizza place to open in the US

sebstan_fan: oh wow an excellent choice :)

*a couple weeks later*

You and your new tumblr friend have been talking about one another’s favorite hobbies and interests for the past few weeks. You feel like you have grown a new connection with your new friend and telling them about your shitty days at work. Today your best friend wanted to bring you with her and her boyfriend to some fancy restaurant.

y/b/n: Carter, I’m practically third wheeling with her and her boyfriend.

sebstan_fan: well that sounds awful. Where is she taking you?

y/b/n: idk to some fancy restaurant I’ve never heard of. Anyways she’s making me wear fancy clothes, but I just wanna wear my pajamas!

sebstan_fan: y/n come on. you gotta dress nice if other people are dressing nice too

y/b/n: ughh ok I think I found something nice. *sends picture of yourself in an elegant dress* what about this?

Seb’s POV

Sebastian got a glass of water and sat back down on his couch. Unlocking his phone to see the new dm from you he spit his water out of his mouth wetting the coffee table in front of him. “HOLY SHIT SHE’S GORGEOUS!” he yelled aloud staring at his phone in awe of your beauty.

sebstan_fan: Y/N, you look amazing! That dress is literally making you glow!

y/b/n: stop you’re making me blush..my friend just pulled up. I’ll dm you later once this stupid night is over.

sebstan_fan: alright have fun

y/b/n: <3

Sebastian quickly called Mackie to tell him that you sent him a photo of yourself.

“Dude, she is unbelievably gorgeous. I actually spit my water out all over my coffee table when I saw the picture. ” Sebastian said on the phone.

“Man you are so obsessed with her, it's kinda creepy.” Anthony replied through the phone.

“What? No man, we just clicked. We have a bunch in common and she’s really easy to talk to.” Sebastian gushed to his friend.

“Yeah, but she doesn’t know that you’re lying to her about your real identity. You’re like fucking Superman with a secret persona!” Anthony snickered at the man on the other line.

“Dude no, but I’ll tell her eventually that I’m me.” Seb replied back to Anthony.

“Well you better do it soon because I’m tired of hearing about you gushing over this woman.” Anthony huffed under his breath. “Anyways I gotta go so bye bitch.”

Sebastian laughed at his friend hanging up the phone and heading to his room getting ready for bed. As he laid on his bed he couldn’t take his mind off of you in that dress. You were so open with sharing your life to him, a complete stranger, yet he couldn’t do the same.

*the next day*

y/b/n: Carter! I forgot to dm you once I got home, but that dinner was terrible. I hated every minute of it.

sebstan_fan: what happened? Also good morning :)

y/b/n: good morning, sorry if I woke you. But anyways my best friend and her boyfriend brought some dude to make it a double date and the guy was a complete douche. I couldn’t stand a minute being there.

sebstan_fan: damn I’m sorry to hear that. I bet if I was there with you the night wouldn’t have been so bad haha

y/b/n: creepy..jk But I bet we would have completely ditched my friend and her boyfriend lol

sebstan_fan: wait, I got an idea! I mean since we live around the same area why don’t we meet!

y/b/n: what like in person?

sebstan_fan: no through zoom, yes in person!

y/b/n: wow the sarcasm in this one, but that sounds like a lovely idea. I feel like I already know so much about you tho...

Sebastian huffed under his breath, “not everything.”

sebstan_fan: lol yeah but it’ll be different to meet in person. Anyways where should we meet?

y/b/n: lol that’s true. Well I know this small cafe that’s so cute and I heard they have pretty good pastries. It would be awesome to meet there :D

sebstan_fan: alright how about Saturday afternoon? You don’t have work right?

y/b/n: nope I’m off! but that sounds good to me! I’m so excited and nervous at the same time. Like what if you’re some creepy stalker...

Sebstan_fan: why would you accuse me of such a thing?!

y/b/n: lol you know i’m just messing with you. But I gotta go my friend is now calling me, probably about that douche from last night...but I can’t wait to see you Carter!<3

“Yeah, me too.” Sebastian said to himself smiling.

*Saturday*

You sat at the cafe where you told your new tumblr friend to meet you. You ordered a drink and once it was finished, you grabbed it and sat near the windows saving a seat for Carter. As you waited you pulled out your laptop and began on typing away a new fic idea drawing inspiration from the small cafe and the gloomy weather outside.

“I’m sorry that seat’s taken...” you muttered to a man who pulled out the chain next to you, looking up at the figure. “Holy shit!” you exclaimed to the man who sat next to you.

“Shhhh...Please don’t say anything.” Sebastian whispered to you, sitting on the chair next to you and taking off his sunglasses.

“What? But how? You’re!? I can’t breathe.” you exclaimed erratically looking down at your drink.

“Hey, hey Y/N, just calm down and take slow deep breaths.” he said calmly placing his hand on your back.

“How the fuck do you know my name?!” you exclaimed again staring wide eyed at the actor. “Am I getting pranked or something? Where are the cameras?!” you nervously laughed looking around the empty cafe.

“No, you’re not getting pranked. It’s me Carter…” he said quietly rubbing the back of his head.

“You’re Carter?! I thought you were a girl!” you said looking into the man’s blue eyes.

“I may have lied about who I was, but I wanted to meet you.” he started as he stared down at the ground. “I didn’t want you to freak out knowing that it was actually me.” he said looking back up at you.

“Let me just gather my thoughts for a sec.” you said, putting your hand to your temples.

“Wait, why did you assume I was a girl?” he asked with a smirk.

“I don’t know! Carter is a unisex name.” you frantically said with a shrug. “And I mean most of my followers are female, so I just assumed you were one too.” you added grabbing your drink and taking a sip to calm your nerves.

“That makes sense I guess.” he said chuckling, looking out the big window of the cafe.

“This is so crazy that you are here. Sitting next to me and talking about my stupid tumblr blog.” you uttered. “Like you’re famous!”

“Yeah so what.” he looked back to you.

“I mean aren’t you busy filming and stuff?” you asked the man.

“Nope, we just wrapped up the interviews a couple of weeks ago. I’m on vacation.” he said with a toothy grin, which made you blush. “Aww look she’s blushing.” he said sweetly towards you.

“Shut up. It’s not like I get to meet my favorite actor who I’ve had a crush on since forever sitting next to me and casually conversing with.” you muttered quickly hoping he didn’t hear your profession of love for him.

“You got a crush on me?” he smiled at you.

“Fuck you. I do not!” you exclaimed looking away from him.

“Aww I think you do.” he said, nudging your shoulder.

“Whatever.” you said under your breath trying to hide your embarrassment.

“Hey, I’m in awe too.” he began, which made you look at him. “It’s not like I get to see a beautiful woman who I like.” he smirked at you.

“I think I’m dreaming. Did you just say you like me?!” you asked pinching yourself back into reality.

“I mean yeah. I really like your work as a writer and the past what month we’ve been talking I think you’re a really cool and sweet person.” he said now blushing.

“I bet you say that to all the women you meet.” scoffing at his comment.

“No I’m serious Y/N. I think you’re a really talented writer. And I think you’re also really pretty.” again blushing, but this time he looked straight at you.

“Oh, wow. Thank you so much Sebastian.” you hesitated, your cheeks heating up. “That means a lot coming from you.” you smiled.

“Of course. And also I wanted to ask you in person if after coming clear about who I actually am, if you wanted to go out sometime. I know its weird and all sudden but-”

“Yes!” you exclaimed quickly cutting him off. “I mean. I would love to.” you said more calmly. “God, I’m trying so hard to keep my inner fangirl in.” you huffed under your breath.

Sebastian laughed at your comment and then asked, “Alright then. What about tomorrow I take you out for dinner?”

“That sounds delightful.” you smiled at the man. The two of you fell silent watching the people who passed by the small cafe.

“Oh, but can I ask you one more question? Why are you wearing a hat? And shades earlier? It's legit rainy and cloudy as hell outside.” you asked, looking at the man with your head resting on your hand.

“I’m going incognito. I don’t want my fans to recognize me.” he replied, taking a sip of his coffee.

“Are you embarrassed of them seeing you with me?” you hesitantly interrogated.

“No, I just don't want them to interrupt our first date.” he responded with a smirk looking at you.

“Wait, this is a date?!” you exclaimed with wide eyes.

“Only if you want it to be sweetheart.” Sebastian smirked, winking towards you.

“Fuck you.” You said with a smile.

A/N: Yay you finished! Was that good? bad? cheesy? lemme know lol Again if you wanna be tagged in future fics, have any requests or just wanna chat hit me up! Thank you guys for reading and I hope you get excited for more stuff to come.

Tags: @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @sebtheromanianprince @aquabrie @who-the-hell-is-sebastianstan @princess76179 @anbrax5553 @wintersoldierissucharide @caplanbuckybarnes @miraclesoflove @kitkatd7 @msgreenverse @saiyanprincessswanie @fandomsandxfiles @hailmary-yramliah @coffeebooksandfandom @thefallenbibliophilequote

^please lemme know if you wanna be added to future works or removed for tags^

#Sebastian Stan #sebastian stan fic #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian x reader #reader x sebastian #sebastian stan x reader #reader x sebastian stan #sebastian stan x you #you x sebastian #sebastian x you #you x sebastian stan #reader insert #sebastian stan fluff

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gavillain · 3 years ago

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Honestly I’m completely over the dumb Sigyn drama flooding onto that one post I made, so this is the last time I’m going to mention it or talk about it. But jonquilclegane has been lying about me and misrepresenting me on her blog, and honestly that’s not cool. So I’m gonna set the record straight, and then I’m done engaging with these people.

“ "Appropriately toxic and abusive." Just me or does that sound like OP is saying Sigyn deserves to be abused?“

Not what I said. I said it was portrayed as appropriately toxic and abusive. He’s awful to her in the comics, and the comics, unlike certain fans, never try to pretend otherwise. No, obviously she didn’t deserve to be abused. She’s the victim of his cruelty. And pretending otherwise is exactly what I had a problem with in the original post.

It looks like this person has not read the myths

No, I’ve read them. I just don’t care about them. An adaptation stands on its own by its own merits. Yes, Marvel uses the myths as inspiration, but they’re telling a distinctly different story. Or did I miss the chapter in mythology where Loki fought a man with iron robotic armor?

they had only read the comics that suited their view : no word on Loki begging Thor to save Sigyn from the Flame, no word on the “Love of his eternal life”, no word on Theoric and how Loki killed him to marry Sigyn… (that last part is pretty awful, BUT that fan seemed to think Loki only ever hated Sigyn…. when we know it is not true…)

I have read all of those comics. I never said that Loki didn’t at one point love her or at least didn’t at one point think of her in a positive way. But the way their relationship devolved was into hatred and abuse that dominated their dynamic in the comics for the majority of Sigyn’s time in them. Abusers aren’t always abusive from the start, and they can have moments of kindness. Doesn’t change the abuse that happens.

Them saying they believe Loki only loves men made me laugh too… Yeah. After a few vicious s*lk*es, we’re back fighting the Th*rk*es/fr*stir*n/ and so on…

Yeah, I have reasons for that headcanon and that reading of the character, but that’s just my fanon. I am, however, NOT a Thorki or FrostIron shipper. Thorki is one of my least favorite Marvel ships, and while some FrostIron artwork and the like is good and interesting, I don’t enjoy the majority of the content of that ship.

What makes me laugh is that THEY ARE DOING THE SAME, but with other characters. They’re lusting after Loki, and shipping him with their own OC, or favourite character, but, for them, I guess, it’s ok? XD

Okay, let’s unpack this, because this is just blatantly wrong about me. First off, I’m not lusting after Loki. He’s one of my favorite villains. I think he’s incredibly well written and fascinating, and I love reading him and his stories. But I’m not fantasizing about getting with him. You can love a character and not think they’d be a good person or someone you’d want to have sex with IRL, shocking though that may apparently be...

Secondly, I DON’T HAVE AN OC WHO I SHIP WITH LOKI. I don’t do OCs. Yes, I have a character who I ship with Loki, but the difference is I’m not shipping him with someone he abused and resented for the majority of their time together in the comics so....

They accuse us of having a “sweet girl turns bad boy into good with the power of love”, but they’re doing the same XD

No, I’m not. I’m actually doing “bad boy meets other bad boy and makes one another worse” if you wanna be reductive.

They’re telling themselves that Sigyn was not good enough

No. I’m not. It’s the opposite. Loki wasn’t good enough for Sigyn. But, really, I just don’t think they were right for each other. She deserved someone who could love and appreciate her devotion, and he deserved someone who actually likes the worst parts of him.

but that their oc/character is THE ONE for him, that Loki will love THEIR OC/character and will be different with them than he was with her.

Okay, my ship for him is Doctor Doom. And, yeah, he IS different with Doom than he is with Sigyn. Blatantly so in the comics if you’ve read them. They have a different dynamic of two powerful and dangerous men always trying to get the better of one another and out maneuver the other. And the difference is that if Loki treats Doom the way that he treats Sigyn, Doom’ll just treat him the same way in kind. And they both know that. There’s no power imbalance. There’s not one who’s trying to change who Loki is and make him anything other than villainous. They’re on a level playing field where they’d get each other, and they’ve got back up plans upon back up plans as a “nuclear deterrent” of sorts.

So, no, I don’t just ship him with someone else who I think he’d be different and change for. I ship him with someone who goes with him without needing him to change or be anything else than who he is.

And when you speak to them about the Multiverse, how Sigyn might have a nice Loki variant in another timeline… well, you saw what happens. Total denial, they shut themselves down, and there’s no conversation possible.

No, what makes no conversation possible is blocking someone and then lying about them on your blog. But, hey, you do you. For the record, I never said that Sigyn couldn’t have a nice Loki variant in another timeline. Maybe so! That’d be great for her! But it’s NOT relevant to the post that you interjected yourself into where I was asked about my opinion on the comics-verse.

But, hey, why should I expect an honest or nuanced take from someone who interjected herself onto my post without needing to in order to “defend” a fictional character and then blatantly lie about and misrepresent a real person. Why interject yourself into a post where I was asked for my opinion on a subject, where you weren’t wanted or asked for, and then block a person after a conversation had begun unless you don’t actually want a conversation. You just want people who don’t agree with you to shut up.

So, in conclusion...

#jonquilclegane #Sigyn #fandom drama

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sadsinclair · 4 years ago

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I cannot stay silent about this anylonger, I have seen some posts in the bioshock hashtag that have aimed to down on those who ship certain characters in the fandom. This of course goes for every fandom!

This is a FANDOM, these ships do not have to be cannon and do not have to be agreed by everyone on the internet. And to add to this, these are fictional characters and not to be taken seriously. And if you take them seriously be mindful that not everyone is going to be doing the same.

You don’t get the right to dictate who can like specific content on the internet, especially if what they are doing isn’t harming anyone. I won’t be sharing names of accounts because I’m not that low and I’m almost positive that it’s only children being children. We make mistakes! But bashing on others and spreading harmful allegations based on a persons personal liking of a relationship amongst FICTIONAL characters is not acceptable behaviour. This can absolutely damage someone’s personal life, weather it be getting a job or even mental health.

How would you like it if someone called you a rapist, or claiming You as a abuser because of the fake relationship you ship between two fictional beings. These are serious allegations! This can harm someone’s personal life. And all these are claimed and spread about just because you don’t agree with the pairing of FAKE CHARACTERS.

I in no way think abuse is ok! And if you believe I think it is due to my liking of atlas and jack then you are very mistaken. I judge people based on their real life mistakes not their fictional character pairings.

Stating stuff like “well actually all the characters are ____ insert sexuality (weather it be ace, gay, lesbian, pan—-“ that’s a personal depiction of the characters you love. Doesn’t have to be cannon and you all don’t have to agree with one another. But this doesn’t mean you dictate how people view characters.

To add onto this I find it absolutely heart breaking to read posts where others bash on a ship post (example- jackXatlas, sinclairXdelta, RyanXfontaine) simply because they find it disgusting due to the history’s of the characters or even because it’s man on man, girl on girl, or man on women.These relationships are not meant to be cannon! They are created by the fans for their own entertainment. Doesn’t mean it’s really in the story.

Have an opinion and a preference but this doesn’t give you the right to bully people on the internet or allow you to spread harmful allegations. Ask yourself, is this person harming me or someone else by Drawing or writing this? If the answer is no then be kind and swipe by.

And before ANYONE wants to start with “well shipping children characters aren’t ok” I agree, it isn’t ok to fantasize young children doing adult things! This post isn’t to defend those who believe it’s ok to sexualize underaged characters. This post is simply meant to get the point across that we can like different content and ship others without bullying those who have a different depiction of a character as well as not spread harmful allegations.

You don’t know everyone personally! Stating life threatening claims (abuser, pedophile, etc..) are not acceptable. It’s one thing if they are a danger to media and you have records of said person doing illegal things and such but unless you do... do not say these things.

I’m positive this message won’t change the minds of those who are stuck in their own way of thinking and are not open to others ideas but hopefully down the road this can help someone out.

Remember, ITS A VIDEO GAME! it’s FICTIONAL. fandoms are created by the fans exploring with new ideas with an already made storyline and character base. Stop Villianizing those with non harmful opposing viewpoints on something so pointless like fake character relationships. We have bigger problems to fight about! For example, getting grown ass adults to not groom children and getting equal rights for those who should have had them to begin with.

You don’t have to like everyone’s content and you also don’t have to comment.

Once again I’m not saying that it’s ok to sexualize underaged characters and to add to that I also don’t think real life children should be sexulaized either: that’s nasty af.

No one owns the fandom! Sure the franchise might be owned but all the fan made story’s and art.. that’s the community’s lovely doing. Embrace different depictions and engage with your community. Bring eachother up! Most likely everyone’s self conscious about their lovely creations.

Xoxo 💋 yours truly

(If you want to discuss further or have questions my dms are open. I’m not here to put people down but uplift them.)

#bioshock #bioshock 2 #bioshock fandom #bioshock burial at sea #bioshock infinite

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meowmerson · 5 years ago

Note

Can you write a Tomione doctor AU? I’ve always thought it would be really cute if they were surgeons.

perhaps…………………a nurse/patient AU????????????? :)

(only because i was trying to think of a story for doctor tomione but my brain kept going back to this so i hope its ok, if it s not you can send me another ask DEMANDING A SURGEON AU and i promise i will brainstorm an idea)

(also uh im sorry i made it really long)

–

It’s the tail end of the night shift when she sees him, although the first time is fleeting. Fleeting, but not irrelevant.

He’s flanked by six guards from the prison. He looks like he’s in pain, and quite a lot of it. He’s wheeled in on a hospital bed to room 119 and she watches from the reception desk as he and his entourage of prison guards pass her by in almost slow motion.

“What timing,” Lavender said with a cheeky grin, “Your shift just ended. You’ll miss out on all the fun.”

“Your idea of fun,” Hermione corrected, completing her chart for the night, “My idea of fun involves going home, having breakfast with my daughter, taking her to school, and going to sleep,” She put her pen down and smiled in the face of Lavender’s pout, “But enjoy the day shift with the clearly dangerous criminal.”

“Tell Rose I said hi,” Lavender said.

Hermione went home and did exactly as she said she would. She paid the babysitter, laid down in Rose’s bed for a moment before gently waking her. She smiled at her 3-year-old daughter across bowls of cheerios and listened to her talk about what she dreamt about the night before. Then she dressed Rose, brought her to pre-school, kissed her goodbye, and returned home. She fell asleep in her scrubs, and didn’t dream about the man flanked by prison guards.

–

Hermione worked nights for a few reasons. The biggest one was the amount of time she got to spend with her daughter - she could always skimp on sleep to spend more time with Rose, but she couldn’t exactly skip work, and if she only worked while Rose was sleeping (save for a few precious hours at night) it meant she would never need to miss a school play, a birthday party, pancakes on sundays, or pillow forts in their living room. She could see all of that.

Nights were quieter too. No visitors, some patients slept but some didn’t, Lavender only worked day shifts so Hermione only ever saw her for an hour at most if their shifts overlapped which was about as much of Lavender as she could take. And no visitors, god Hermione hated visitors.

She worked 3 nights a week, sometimes 4 if she needed the money and they had an overtime shift for her. She was always tired, always a bit stressed, and her hair had never looked worse than it did in motherhood, but it was all worth it for the time she got to spend with her daughter.

She had to remember that, when she had nights like this one.

“Apparently he hasn’t urinated in a week,” Neville said, “He had a pretty severe blatter infection and sepsis but is steadily getting better,”

“Why hadn’t he urinated?” Hermione asked, and Neville shrugged.

“They think it might be an escape plan, so uh,” he none-too-subtly leaned to the side to peer at the guards outside room 119, “They’re keeping an eye on him.”

“How is he?” She asked.

“Horrible,” He answered, “Right bastard, gave Lavender hell all day on his first day in, didn’t sleep all night, then we gave him to Minerva–”

“Well, surely she set him straight,” Hermione interjected.

Neville laughed, but there was no humor in it, “Yeah well, she handled it fine, but she also said if we give him to her as a patient again she’s going to retire.”

“Shit,” Hermione sighed. She thought of Rose, asleep in her bed and thought of seeing her in the morning and waking her up for breakfast, “So naturally you give him to me.”

“Well,” He shrugged, looking sheepish, “It was either you or me, so…”

“So you sweet-talked the charge nurse into giving you an easy night?” Hermione quirked a brow and Neville just grinned. Hermione sighed, picked up the chart, and turned to face Room 119.

There were only two guards now, not six, and they nodded at her as she entered.

Tom Riddle sat on the bed in a room of his own, he looked pale, with dark circles under his eyes, and he fixed his eyes disconcertingly on her the moment she stepped through the door.

“My name is Hermione,” She said, putting gloves on at the door, “I’ll be your nurse tonight.”

“Is that so?” He asked. His voice was deep, but gravelly. He must be exhausted, she thought, if he truly hadn’t slept since he arrived.

“How are you feeling?” She asked, but before he could answer she added, “I hear you haven’t slept since–”

“How can I sleep?” He cut her off, “Sitting in a hospital bed with a new nurse every few hours asking me the same inane questions?”

Hermione paused, observed him for a moment. She had dealt with plenty of difficult patients, was used to biting her tongue and slapping a smile on her face. He kept staring at her with dark eyes, his jaw clenched, and she knew what she was in for.

“Well, Mr. Riddle,” Hermione said with a smile, “I will endeavor not to ask the same inane questions, then.” She stepped closer, made a vague gesture in his direction and asked, “May I?”

He was receiving fluids, antibiotics, seemed stable, she just needed to check his blood pressure to be sure. The fact that he obviously hadn’t slept wasn’t a good sign and certainly wouldn’t help in his recovery. He nodded once, tersely, and she glanced back at the guards at the door.

“Is it because of the guards that you won’t sleep?” She asked as she took his blood pressure. His brow twitched, but he didn’t look away from her face.

“If I said yes, would you take them away?” He asked her. She looked up from her work to meet his eye and tried to figure out if he was making a joke.

Either way she laughed, shook her head, and said, “I think we would both love that, but no, unfortunately not.”

His blood pressure was low, but according to his chart improving. It would probably help if he slept. She met his gaze, he was still watching her. “Your blood pressure is low.” She told him, “You should sleep.”

“I should sleep?” He echoed, his brow rose like he was talking down to a child, “Close my eyes, and dream?” He looked almost crazed, she thought. She wasn’t sure if that was the lack of sleep, the time he spent in prison, or maybe it was just who he was. Either way, she didn’t move - it was always better not to react when a patient became angry. “Let the medication take effect, while the rest of you skirt around me like an animal in cage–”

“Sir–” She interjected, but he spoke over her.

“While men with guns fantasize about the possibility of turning those very guns on me while I sleep and while I continue to be denied visitors that I would typically be allowed to see simply because I am unwell–” She sighed and made to move away as he worked himself up, but he grabbed her arm. She met his eyes again “–Don’t pretend to be concerned for my health, nurse,” He spat, “Shut your mouth, treat me, and keep your inane thoughts to yourself, lest I lose my temper.”

“Hey!” A guard from the door called, took a step into the room. Hermione held out a hand to stop him, “Miss–”

“Please let me do my job!” She said, turning to hold a hand out more firmly against the guard at the door. He hesitated, shifted his weight on his feet. “Return to your post, please.”

The guard very pointedly looked at the place where Mr. Riddle’s hand was on her arm. Hermione looked at that same hand, then back at the guard, and she hoped she was communicating every ounce of annoyance she felt in that stare.

The guard returned to his post.

Hermione’s gently pried Tom Riddle’s fingers from her arm. “It was merely a suggestion,” She said and met his eyes with a smile, “Stay awake if you wish.”

He was stable, so she turned to leave the room. The guard stopped her at the door. “Hey, uh–” He said, glancing into the room and back at her, “Could I get a sandwich?”

She looked him up and down.

“It’s just, we’ve been here all day, I’m pretty hungry.”

“No,” She snapped, “We don’t give sandwiches to the guards, they’re for the patients.”

“Well, he’s not going to eat it.” He said, gesturing toward Room 119 with his head. Hermione, taken aback, glanced into the room and saw Mr. Riddle’s eyes fixed on her before she looks back at the guard.

“Don’t ask me again,” She said, and walked away.

–

That night, she had Mr. Riddle with the temper and the armed guards, Mrs. Sprout with the lovely disposition recovering from a severe allergic reaction, and Mr. Crouch the drug seeker in the hospital for a broken leg who wouldn’t stop screaming for opiates, and Mr. Riddle’s stupid fucking guard who kept asking her for sandwiches.

It was a long night.

“What is he in for, anyway?” Padma asked, looking toward Hermione for an answer. She didn’t have to specify who - obviously she meant the one with the guards. Hermione shrugged - she really didn’t know.

“Like everything.” Neville said, pouring himself a coffee while Padma patiently awaited her cup. “He’s in jail for life for everything from selling weed to killing people and chopping them up.”

“No way,” Padma said.

“Yes way,” Neville took a sip from his coffee and shrugged, “You heard about him - he went by Voldemort.”

Padma gasped, turned and faced Hermione with wide eyes and a wide-open mouth, “Hermione, you’re treating Voldemort,”

“I’m treating a very irritable prison patient” Hermione corrected, “And not for the first time.”

“He was all over the news last year!” Padma said, clearly distressed, “He’s crazy - and I heard he didn’t piss for a week to be sent here, this is probably all his plan or–”

“Padma, drop it.” Hermione snapped. “There are two guards outside his room, a guard at the lifts, a guard at each stairwell and at the front entrance of the hospital. Mr. Riddle is in a hospital bed recovering from sepsis.” She stood up, “I suggest we all stop panicking and help him to recover, like it’s our job to do.”

She left the break room and glanced toward Room 119 and saw only one guard.

“Excuse me!” She called, hurrying toward the singular guard, “Excuse me,” She said again, peeking into the room. Mr. Riddle was still awake, watching her as she appeared in the doorway. She looked at the guard, “Where the hell is the other one?”

“Miss, please calm down.” The guard said.

“Where is he?” She asked again, “Where has he gone - doesn’t he have a job to do?”

“He stepped away for a moment.”

“Stepped away where?” She demanded.

“Calm down, nurse,” A voice said, and she turned her head to see the guard approaching with a sandwich in his hand.

“Where did you get that?” She asked quietly, a familiar feeling of annoyance mixed with rage in her chest, the kind that only comes after a long night of work on very little sleep.

“The vending machine downstairs.” He said, shrugging. He started to open the package, but Hermione snatched it out of his hands.

“This nurse has a name,” She said, “It’s Hermione Granger, and I expect you to use it. And no one,” She lifted the sandwich to eye level, right in his face, “Is going to be eating any sandwiches here except for Mr. Riddle, as he is the patient. The rest of us will do our jobs and eat when we’re done.”

The guard laughed, “Okay, okay, just give me back the–” He reached for it and she snatched it away. His smile fell off his face.

She marched into the room, tearing open the package and thrusting it toward Mr. Riddle in his bed.

“He doesn’t want it!” The Guard protested.

“Yes he does,” Hermione snapped, and turned back toward Mr. Riddle in the bed, who was staring oddly at her. “Don’t you, Mr Riddle?”

He just stared at her. She thought maybe he would have another temper tantrum and start yelling. “Take it,” She encouraged gently, “Please.”

To her surprise, he did. He took the sandwich and took a bite, watching her all the while.

She smiled.

“There,” She said, turning back toward the guard, “Don’t leave your post again or I will inform your superior.”

She left the room, grateful that Mr. Riddle didn’t have another one of his outbursts this time.

Her shift was nearly over anyway.

–

When she returned home, she laid down in Rose’s bed minutes before she was meant to wake.

“Mummy?” Rose murmured.

“Good morning,” Hermione whispered.

“I dreamed you were a kangaroo.” Rose said. Hermione laughed.

“Were you a Joey?” Hermioned asked.

“No,” She said, “I’m a Rose.”

Hermione laughed again, “A Joey is a baby kangaroo,” She explained.

“Oh,” Rose said, and then, “Can we have cheerios?”

Hermione loved these moments more than anything.

She watched Rose over bowls of Cheerios again. She would gladly spend every morning, every moment like this. She thought of the loneliness she felt when she first found out she was pregnant, the boundless love she felt when she held her in her arms for the first time, the feeling in her chest like she was going to explode with happiness when the nurse handed over her baby, wrapped in a white blanket.

She dreamed of a life where she could have this always, no interruptions.

–

She returned to work the next night.

“Why the hell do I have Riddle again?” She asked when she looked at the assignments for the night. Lavender was there, the tail end of her shift, and she raised her eyebrows and looked away. “What?” Hermione pressed.

Minerve spoke up, “He asked for you.”

“He what?” Hermione balked.

“Fucking screamed about it,” Lavender muttered, “I tried to bring him something to help him sleep and he slapped it out of my hand and said he wouldn’t take anything from the hand of a whore.”

“He said what?”

“He’s crazy,” Lavender said, “Fucking crazy, good luck Hermione, you’ll need it.”

And she left like that, clearly furious. Hermione looked to Minerva, but Minerva said nothing, simply raised her eyebrows in the way she always did and left to start her rounds.

The guards outside the room were different than the night before. They nodded to her as she entered. Mr Riddle watched her, looking more tired than ever.

“Miss Granger,” He greeted.

“Mr. Riddle,” Hermione replied, smiling, “I heard you were asking for me.”

“You’re my favorite nurse.” He said.

“Already?” Hermione asked, “Well, it sounds like you aren’t giving anyone else much of a chance.”

“I liked seeing you with McLaggen yesterday.” He said. Hermione wasn’t sure what he meant, and that must have shown on her face, because he said, “The guard.”

“Ah,” She nodded, and added, “You know, this version of you doesn’t exactly match up with the man who apparently slapped medication out of a nurse’s hand and called her a whore.”

“That nurse,” Riddle said as Hermione read over his chart and set about checking his vitals, “goes between speaking to me like I’m a child, and speaking to me like I’m a war criminal.”

“Sometimes you act like both,” Hermione said.

Mr. Riddle snapped his eyes to meet hers, and it took that for her to realize he finally hadn’t been staring at her. But he was now. Hermione blinked, and then realized what she just said.

“I hope you won’t start slapping me and calling me a whore.” She said, a poor attempt at a joke.

He smiled then, and it struck her that despite the dark circles around his bloodshot eyes, despite his pale skin and gaunt cheeks he really was sinfully handsome. “You wouldn’t like that?” He asked.

“No,” Hermione said firmly, and trying to change the subject she asked, “Are you hungry?”

“I am,” He said, but before she could be too pleased by his cooperation, he continued, “But first I have a question.”

“Yes?” She prompted.

“How old are you?” He asked.

She smiled. Such a random question, such a strangely serene patient. “I’m 27.”

“You look older,” He said, and she couldn’t help but breathe out a short laugh. “I don’t mean any offense,” He continued, “I mean that you don’t hold yourself like most people your age.”

“I’m sorry, I’m not sure what you mean.”

“The way you look. Like someone who has a large amount of responsibility and wisdom. A teacher, a scholar,” Hermione was taking her gloves off when he said, “Or a mother.”

She paused. She watched him for a long moment in silence. The guards stood silently outside the door.

“I apologize,” Mr. Riddle said, “I am only trying to make conversation.

“Are you a father?” She asked him, and he laughed. Twice she’d seen him smile now.

“No,” He said, “I never had time.”

She thought about what Padma and Neville said in the breakroom, thought about the armed guards at every exit. She wondered why he was asking her these questions, why he was here, why he had forced himself to become ill enough to end up in the hospital, she wondered…

“I have a daughter.” She admitted. Because here he was a man, receiving treatment, and she refused to treat him like an animal.

“Does she look like you?” He asked her, “Or her father?”

She smiled, a bit tightly, and didn’t answer.

He did a funny thing then - hie eyes narrowed just a bit, he tilted his head, and his mouth twisted in what wasn’t quite a smile but couldn’t be defined as anything else.

“I’ll get you something to eat.” Hermione said, “Do you want something to help you sleep?”

“Not yet,” He said, “I don’t want to sleep while you’re here.”

Her stomach twisted at that, and she a strange, nervous feeling made her hands twitch, as if there was something humming just underneath her skin.

“I’ll bring you some food.” She said.

“Thank you, Hermione.” He said.

The guards watched her as she left the room.

–

He was the easiest patient she ever had.

He let her run his IV, administer the antibiotics, check his vitals, all without any complaints, just a few odd questions. He didn’t ask about her daughter again, perhaps because he noted that she became uncomfortable when he did. Instead, he asked what her parents did for a living, he asked where she was from, he asked irrelevant things like her favorite flower and how she took her tea.

He was much chattier than she expected him to be.

“Miss Granger,” Minerva said in the break room, using her surname as if she was a patient. She always did that. “How has Mr. Riddle been?”

“Fine, actually.” Hermione said. “The guards are more difficult than he is, although the ones tonight aren’t so bad. They’re quiet.”

Minerva raised a single eyebrow and said nothing else.

Hermione gave Tom Riddle a sleeping pill at the end of her shift, and he took it with a smile.

–

“Do you have to go?” Rose asked.

It was 7:00pm. The babysitter had just arrived and Hermione was dressed in her scrubs ready to go to work for the third night in a row and Rose was crying. Hermione brushed her daughter’s hair out of her face and felt her heart wrench.

“I’m sorry, darling,” She said, “I’ll be back in the morning, just like always.”

“But I want you to read me a story,” Rose sniffled, snot running out of her nose. She wiped at it messily with the back of her hand. “I want you to read me a bedtime story.”

“I’ll read you a story in the morning, I promise.” Hermione said, “I’ll come back home, just like always, in the morning. When you wake up I’ll be right there next to you.”

She never once wished that Rose’s father was around - he didn’t even know he had a child, and Hermione would keep it that way - but in moments like this, she always wished she wasn’t alone. Maybe it would be easier that way.

Rose wouldn’t stop crying. Hermione had to shut the door on her crying and begging her mother not to leave.

–

“Again?” Hermione snapped as soon as she saw the assignments for the night. “Again? Seriously?”

“Stop complaining,” Lavender snapped, “Everyone knows he’s an angel with you.”

“Why are you still here?” Hermione snapped back, and Lavender glowered back at her.

“I’m just leaving,” She said, “He has given me hell ever since he woke up, so good fucking luck.”

She watched Lavender storm out, but the only thing she really took from that conversation was that he finally got some rest. She looked at Room 119, saw the guards outside the door. McLaggen, the annoying one, he still wasn’t there - it was the same guards from the night before.

She started toward the room, and the guards watched her closely as they always did. They nodded to her as she entered the room.

And she stopped short.

A tall, blonde man was sat by Mr. Riddle’s bed. He had one of Riddle’s hands clasped between his, and looked as if he was saying something quite passionately before Hermione interrupted.

Visitors weren’t allowed on the night shift.

Tom Riddle wasn’t meant to have visitors at all.

“What the hell is this?” Hermione asked, quietly, let the low tone of her voice fill the room that was silent except for the steady beating of Mr. Riddle’s heart monitor.

Tom Riddle blinked at her, and said nothing.

“No visitors.” She said firmly, and turned toward the guards, “Why the hell does he have a visitor?”

The guards looked at each other, and then her, and said nothing.

She turned toward the blonde man, feeling as if she was in a dream or on a TV show, something that couldn’t be real life, “Get out.” She snapped, “No visitors - what part of no visitors do you not understand? Who let you in here?”

“Nurse,” The blonde man snapped, holding up a finger as if to say ‘wait, one second, “Give us a moment.”

“No, I will not give you a moment.” Hermione snapped, “No visitors. Period. You need to leave.” She turned to the guards, “Excuse me?” She threw up her hands, hoping they would soon understand the ridiculousness of the situation. “Get him out.”

The guards walked in, finally, and said, “Sir, it’s time to leave.”

“No, it is not time to leave.” The blonde man snapped. He must come from money, Hermione thought, that was the only thing that would explain his tone. “We are having a private conversation, so if you don’t mind–”

“Abraxas,” Mr. Riddle interjected. “Do as Hermione asks.”

First, the blonde man - Abraxas - screwed up his face and looked at Mr. Riddle like he thought he was crazy. Then he looked at Hermione, and back at Tom. His expression changed, flattened out, like he suddenly understood something, then he turned his eyes back to Hermione and stared.

He just stared and stared, his expression unreadable, in a way that made Hermione acutely uncomfortable.

“Goodbye, sir,” She said, then turned to the guards and said, “Could you both do your job, please?”

“No need,” Abraxas said, his tone quieter, less snobby, less snippy. “I’ll see myself out.”

He reached down and clasped Mr. Riddle’s hand once more, but said nothing. Then he left.

Hermione shut her eyes and took a deep breath, tried to shut the anger away. She felt on edge tonight, it started with the way she left her daughter and was only made worse with all this bullshit. She turned on the guards again, who were returning to their post.

“No visitors.” She snapped, “At all.”

One of the guards nodded tersely. Neither said anything.

She turned back to Mr. Riddle, who was watching her patiently from his bed.

She shouldn’t mention it to him. She knew he could get nasty, she shouldn’t try his temper, she should try to have a nice night at work, but she couldn’t help herself. “You know you aren’t allowed visitors.” She said.

“I know.” He agreed, “I apologize. He always visited me in custody - it is a wasted effort to try and explain to him that anything should be different here.”

“Seems its a wasted effort to explain anything to him at all.” Hermione snarked, pulling on her rubber gloves. Mr. Riddle chuckled.

“You aren’t wrong,” He agreed, and watched her very closely as she approached the bed, “You seem agitated.”

“How are you feeling?” She asked, ignoring his observation.

“I am steadily improving,” He said, “How are you feeling?”

“I’m doing just fine,” She said, moving to take his blood pressure. He caught her arm, far more gentle than the last time he touched her.

“Hermione,” He said her name quietly, reverently, it made her stop in her tracks for a moment. “I can tell that you aren’t.”

She met his eyes then. She had no desire to entertain whatever delusions he was experiencing, whatever it was he thought was going on here. She wanted to get on with her job and return home to her daughter and let him be dragged back to prison.

“I am frustrated that the patients of this hospital are incapable of following basic instructions, and concerned about how incapable the guards outside your room seem to be at doing their job.” She said, “I would like to check your vitals, and then go about my job. I have patients other than you, Mr. Riddle.”

His jaw clenched. He let go of her arm.

She went about her business, and he let her. No questions, no comments, no interruptions. It felt strange, charged, she found that she preferred it when he asked her odd questions.

Abruptly, she felt guilty. Not because she felt like Mr. Riddle didn’t deserve to be told off, because she believed that he did. But it was her job to be his nurse, not anything else, and she had no business telling him off when he was being nothing but polite. She always hated the idea of someone being treated like a burden, or an animal, or anything other than a person in need of human interaction, and who was she to tell off the patient when it was the guards and the nursing staff who allowed it to happen in the first place?

“My daughter,” She said after a long stretch of silence, “She was crying when I left. I hate to leave her like that.”

“It must be difficult,” He said, not missing a beat, as if he was ready for her to break the silence. “Raising her on your own.”

“Yes,” She agreed, “It is. I wish I could be with her all the time.”

“You are a good mother.” He told her.

She stopped her work, raised her head to meet his eyes again. He was always staring at her so intensely, in a way that made her hair stand on end.

She couldn’t help herself when she asked him, “Why do you have armed guards all throughout the hospital guarding you?”

He smiled, “Because I’m a prisoner.” He told her.

“I can’t imagine you committing a crime so terrible you need to be brought in by six guards.” She admitted.

He smiled, and said nothing else.

And something about the way he looked away from her then, looked toward the guards, still smiling, like something about this whole situation was deeply amusing that made her think; it truly wasn’t so far fetched.

And remember the way he acted to people other than herself, remembering the way he somehow had a visitor with the permission of the guards and the nursing staff, she wondered why she had thought it was far-fetched, even for a minute.

She needed some air.

“Are you hungry?” She asked.

“Yes,” He answered, “But not yet.”

A strange answer, but Hermione just nodded and left the room.

The guards, as always, watched her as she left.

–

Hermione researched Voldemort on her break.

Neville wasn’t wrong, he was in prison for life. He was found guilty on counts of Assault, kidnapping, theft, robbery, murder, and multiple drug charges. He was the kingpin for the Death Eaters, which as Hermione understood from the news she read, was an organized crime unit that participated in predominantly drug and arms trading.

If the hospital was an escape plan, as was the original concern, she wondered how someone like him could take so long to carry out his plan. She wondered why he was still there, sitting in his hospital room surrounded by prison guards, sitting patiently, as if he didn’t have any plan but to get well again.

She called the babysitter to check on Rose. She was asleep in her bed.

Hermione took a deep breath and returned to work.

–

“You don’t work tomorrow night.” Mr. Riddle said when she was checking on him after her break.

“No, I’m not.” Hermione said, “Did you ask someone if I was?”

“Yes,” He admitted, “You’re my favorite nurse.”

Hermione smiled. “Try not to call any other nurses whores and you should be just fine.”

“I can’t help it,” He said, “It does make me angry when I have a nurse who isn’t you.”

“That’s rather childish, don’t you think?”

“You know, we’ve met before.” He admitted, and that abruptly caught Hermione’s attention.

“What do you mean?” She asked, quietly, as if they were telling secrets.

He lowered his voice to match her tone, “Once, you looked after a gunshot wound for one of my friends,” Hermione furrowed her brow, shaking her head, she was sure she would remember meeting him. “Before that, a colleague who nearly lost their leg,”

“Mr. Riddle–”

“But that wasn’t the first time.” He continued. His gaze was decidedly intense now. Hermione felt helplessly caught up in it. “The first time, I came to the hospital on business.” He reached out, wrapped his fingers around her wrist, “You were a patient, and I was in the wrong room.”

She didn’t know what he meant. She didn’t remember.

“I held your daughter in my arms,” Hermione felt something heavy settle in her chest, something cold, “You were half asleep. You asked me to hand her to you, you didn’t know who I was. I realized I was in the wrong room but I couldn’t bear to leave.”

“Why were you there?” She asked, her voice was shaking slightly, try as she may to conceal it.

“I was waiting for someone,” He said.

“To threaten them with their baby in your arms?” She guessed. He had that strange expression again, his eyes slightly narrowed, his head tilted, and she knew she was right. “What are you doing here, Mr. Riddle?”

“Right now,” He answered, his voice soft, “I’m looking at you, wondering how many more times we should cross paths before I finally begin paying attention.”

She moved away, feeling unsettled, afraid. She turned, and the guards were stood at the doorway as if nothing was happening at all.

“Mr. Riddle, are you hungry?” She asked.

“Yes,” He answered, “But I don’t want hospital food.”

“I’m afraid thats all I can offer you,” She said, “I’ll let you get some rest.”

She left him like that. She didn’t check him again for the remainder of her shift, and then she left.

She went home, and made good on her promise to Rose to read her a story in the morning.

–

Rose was coloring at the table while the TV was on that morning. Hermione stayed awake despite the long night shift before to have more time with her daughter.

No matter how many channels she switched through they all had the same message.

Voldemort escaped from Hogwarts Medical Centre at 8:22am.

Police had yet to make a statement.

No one knew where he was.

“Mummy,” Rose called, looking up from her coloring book, “Can we bake muffins today?”

Hermione tried to shake the uneasy feeling that had settled deep in her gut. She smiled at her daughter, and thought of the nurse that had so gently handle her daughter over to her that first night. The man who wasn’t really a nurse at all.

“Of course, sweetheart,” Hermione said, and she smiled.

She switched off the TV.

#bubblesbeemma #slightly inspired by a story someone told me abotu a patient they had who was a millianair murderer who held his pee for days #so he would be brought to the hospital #and they thought it was an escape ttempt #and i found it really funny #anyway also i wante dto write something #IM SORRY ITS NOT SURGEONS AT ALL #BUT ITS STILL A HOSPITAL AU #ilu hope u like it #tomione #i didnt proofread because thats my brand #i love typos #meow writes

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sidehowriting · 5 years ago

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Can I Say It?

Masterlist in Bio!

A/N: 1st, as of posting my masterlist is not updated because of who I am as a person but it will be by the end of the week!

2nd ITS OCTOBER BITCHES! Hot girl summer WITCH BITCH FALL!! SPOOKY TIME!

Ok, moving on the to real A/N. So this is for the incredible October challenged hosted by @blackirisposts. I’m not gonna post everyday but I have several stories near completion. The next should be the 4th aka my 27th birthday!

This goes with Hurting Hearts but I don’t think you really need to read that one to enjoy this one. I, personally, love HH so I highly recommend reading it. But I think there’s enough in this one to appreciate it. Also, I tried smut again so apologies.

Prompt: Forest/Woods

Pairings: Billy x Stacy (established relationship)

Summary: Stacy loves Billy and wants him to know.

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: Smut (fingering, unprotected penis in vagina), swears, angst, fluff, mention of abuse

I leaned against the hood of his signature blue Camaro. The sky was so clear tonight. Every star was out and could be counted. “This is such a nice place,” I said, scooting closer to him. The smoke from his cigarette lingering in the air. “I’m so glad you showed it to me.”

“And how is it I knew about it before someone who had lived in Hawkins their whole life had?” He playfully nudged my side, making me smile.

“Maybe because I don’t sleep around,” I quipped. “I’ve never come here just to bang someone in the back of a car.”

He laughed, then took another long drag of his smoke. “That’s true. That's not your style."

I hummed in response. Doing it in the back of a car wasn't my style. Too cramped. Not enough space. Of course, I couldn't say for sure but that's how make out sessions were so I could only assume.

The light breeze drifted through the trees bringing a vague scent of pine with it. It was so nice. So relaxing. Bracing myself on the hood, I hoisted my body up to sit.

Billy gave me the side eye. "Makin' yourself comfortable, sweetheart?"

I smirked. "Always."

With a final inhale, he finished his cigarette and flicked it away. The concern of it causing a forest fire ran through my mind but I pushed it away. It rained yesterday. It would be fine.

He came to stand between my legs, his fingers grabbing my hips. "You're lucky you look so fuckin' pretty."

"Am I?" I cocked my head, asking as innocently as possible. "What if I wasn't?"

Leaning down next to my ear he said, "Then I'd have to do something about it."

"Like?" I challenged.

"You're askin' for it," he said before kissing me hard. My hands clasped his open jacket, pulling him closer to me.

His fingers deftly moved from my hips, down my legs and up under my skirt. "What?" He asked, moving higher. "Are you… not wearing any panties?"

Keeping my hold tight on his jacket, I shyly shook my head. "You kept taking all my good pairs, so I decided just not to wear any." I had hoped that he would like my decision.

Oh, he did.

The glint in his eyes and the smirk on his lips as his tongue poked out made me quiver. "Jesus christ, Stacy." His fingers gripped my upper thigh. "You're gonna fucking kill me." I started to giggle in triumph, but he cut me off with another kiss. Hard and fast and heated. He easily shrugged his jacket off, leaving his torso naked.

His lips still locked on mine, his tongue still in my mouth, he grabbed my hips again and scooted me down closer to him. With ease, my legs slid around him, trapping him between me. Having him here, pressed so hard against me, had my mind spinning.

My fingers tangled into his curly hair as his lips started down my jaw and to my neck. "Fuck…" I muttered, legs tightening around him.

"You like that, sweetheart?" He asked teasingly. One of his hands was around my waist while the other snaked its way back up my skirt and between my legs.

"Yes...Billy… oh fuck!" His fingers found my clit. Slow, languid strokes, making my eyes roll back.

He chuckled, bringing his forehead up to rest against mine. "What was that, princess? I couldn't hear you."

He slid a finger inside me, thumb still circling my clit. "Jesus… Fuck, Billy."

Gripping his shoulders to steady myself, he had me teetering on the edge within minutes. His intense blue eyes were trained on mine the whole time. They made me shiver, feel naked and vulnerable. No one had ever made me feel this way before. And I loved it.

I couldn't hold his gaze as I came, and he didn't reprimand me for it. My eyes closed as my head fell forward into the crook of his neck. "That's it, sweetheart," he said, still gently fingering me, working me through it. “You’re so fuckin’ pretty when you cum.”

Lifting my head back up, I met his eyes briefly before grabbing his face and kissing him. Slow. Passionate. My tongue sliding along his. My heart sped up every time he moaned. Every time he cupped my face. I loved him and I just want to tell him.

“I want you,” I settled on saying instead. My fingers running down his cheeks. “I want you.”

“You have me, baby.” He brushed his nose against mine, briefly pressing his lips to me.

I shook my head. “No, like I want you. I wanna have sex.”

He stepped back, taking me all in. Looking at me like I was crazy. “Now?”

I nodded eagerly. “Yes. Now. On the hood of your car.”

“Don’t chicks want their first time to be in a bed and shit? Something more romantic?”

I shook my head and started taking off my shirt. “I don’t want that. It’s not us.” I tossed it and my bra to the side. “I want you, Billy Hargrove. Right here. Right now.”

“Fuck, sweetheart.” He started to undo his pants, pushing them down along with his boxers. “You don’t have to say it twice.” He wrapped his arms around me, scooting me down the hood farther and hiking up my skirt. He always liked it when I kept the skirt on.

I opened my legs as wide as they would go, unsure of how much room I would need. He grasped his cock, already hard and leaking. Running his fingers up and down my slit, he commented, "You're so wet."

I smiled as he lined his cock up against it. "Wonder why?"

He flashed his signature smirk before asking, “You sure?” He looked up from where his cock was sitting to my eyes, searching them for any hesitation. Any doubts.

I should have them. I had spent years fantasizing about this moment and none of them involved doing it on the hood of a car. And with Billy Hargrove nonetheless. But there was no one else I would want to give myself to.

I nodded, gathering my skirt up as much as I could. “I’m sure.”

He kissed me once more before starting to push in. “Jesus fuckin’ christ,” he moaned, inching farther inside me. “You’re fuckin’ tight.”

“Thanks,” I said meekly, the burning pain from being stretched making me cringe.

Billy stopped instantly, looking at me with concern. “Are you okay?”

I nodded, taking deep breaths to work through the discomfort. “It’s just… your dick is bigger than your fingers.” My eyes squinted shut as I continued to focus.

He started to laugh, his body shaking and inadvertently pushing more inside me. I let out a tiny gasp and he quickly apologized. “We’ll go as slow as you need, okay?” When I didn’t open my eyes his hands gently enveloped my face. “Look at me, baby.” As his fingers caressed my flushed skin, I opened my eyes. “Do you wanna keep going?”

I took another deep breath before answering. “Yes. I do. Keep going.” The burning started to fade, and I wanted more of him.

He nodded before continuing, finally completing sheathing himself inside of me. Keeping still until I said it was alright, he slowly pulled back before thrusting back in.

His moan was loud and vulgar, "Fuck, Stacy…" I couldn't say I was feeling the same pleasure he was.

Not long after he arrived in town, I had started hearing the whispers and rumors. How good Billy was in bed. How he was the best lay any of the girls have had. How they couldn't walk the next day after a night with him. I had a lot of expectations for this moment and they weren't yet met.

The pain and burning had faded, leaving me feeling… well, feeling. There was a dick. It was inside of me. That was that. Deep inside, I could feel the potential. I was on the cusp of pleasure, but I didn’t know how to reach it.

"You alright?" Billy seemed to sense something was off. "Does it hurt?"

I shook my head. "No, it doesn't hurt. It's just...fine."

"Well, we can't have that now, can we?" Billy pulled me in for a quick heated kiss, sending my mind reeling. "Lay back." He commanded firmly.

"What?"

"Sweetheart, we've been messing around for weeks now. I know how to make you feel good. Now, lay back."

I didn’t question him again. I just laid back on the hood of his car, the cold metal a contrast to my hot back. I let out a small yelp at the sensation, but it wasn’t unpleasant. If anything, it added to my arousal.

“I know you like it deep,” Billy groaned, lifting my legs and putting them on his shoulders. “And I know you like it fast.” He pulled almost completely out before slamming back into me, an action he repeated over and over again in quick session.

Fuck, that boy was right. However he was doing it now was a million times better than before. Each time he pounded back in I was seeing stars. This was what I was missing before and damn I never should have doubted how great this could be.

Quickly I was panting, getting the breath knocked out of me in the best way possibly with each of his thrusts. “Jesus… Billy… More…”

“All you gotta do is ask,” he grunted. His curls surrounding his face now sticking to his skin. He looked fucking beautiful.

Removing one of his hands from my legs, he reached down to where our bodies were now joined and found my clit. I hadn’t realized how sensitive it had become since Billy started to plow into me. My legs started to twitch with each pass of his fingers, my orgasm approaching faster than I thought it would.

As soon as I opened my mouth to talk, he started working my clit faster. “Billy, I’m gonna- FUCK I’m gonna cum!”

My eyes started to close as I began to peak. “No, you don’t sweetheart.” His voice snapped me out of it. “You’re not getting out of it this time. You gotta look at me when you cum.” With all my might, I did as he said, looking up at him just as the pleasure was consuming me. “Good girl,” he praised, smirking wildly with his tongue sticking out. Fuck, I was done for.

I screamed, thankful we were in a forest and no one was around. My vision was hazy and full of stars. I couldn’t even tell if I was still looking at Billy or not. All I knew was that every cell in my body felt like it was exploding continuously. I was dazed, exhausted, head all foggy.

I almost missed how Billy started to thrust more wildly, swearing with each one. How his fingers dug into my flesh as he grunted and stilled. How flushed his whole body looked.

Together, our breathing started to even out. He gently put my legs down from his shoulders and I hoisted myself up. I could feel liquid leak out of me as Billy pulled out. I knew my skirt would be ruined but I didn’t care. It was worth it.

Silently, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. Our skin sticking to each other from the sweat we worked up. His response was instant, his arm snuck around my bare torso, pulling me chest to chest with him. He initiated slipping in his tongue and I happily let him enter. This was the closeness, intimacy, that I wanted to cherish.

Cupping his face, my thumb ran over the stubble starting to form on his cheek. I pulled away first, resting my forehead against his. I was still trying to catch my breath.

“How was that for a first time?” He asked, blue eyes staring so intensely into mine.

“Perfect,” I responded, kissing him again. Quicker this time. Light, peppering kisses that made my heart flutter. He made my heart flutter and fuck do I want him to know that.

“Billy?” I asked quietly, approaching with caution. I knew what his answer was going to be, but I still had to try. “Can I say it? Please?”

It had been lingering in the air since that night he saw my mom hit me. The night I knew without a shadow of a doubt that I loved him. And when I woke up the next morning and he was still in my bed, I knew he felt the same. Billy Hargrove doesn’t spend the night. But every time I tried to bring it back up, he would shut me down. Either with words or actions, he never let me tell him how much he meant to me.

This time was no different as he pulled away, the skin that was once covered by him feeling cold. “Stacy…” He ran his hands through his hair, looking anywhere but at me.

“Billy-”

He grabbed my clothes from the ground and tossed them to me. “I should take you home.” He pulled his jeans back up and grabbed his discarded jacket.

Frustrated, I reached out and grabbed his arm. “You’re not gonna fuck me then leave.”

“No,” he said, shrugging me off. “I’m gonna drive you home and make sure you’re safe inside. Then I’m gonna leave.”

“You can’t just do that,” I protested.

He put his jacket back on. “Watch me. Now, get dressed.”

“Billy!” I hopped off the hood of his car. I slipped my shirt back on, not bothering with my bra. “You can’t just ignore me and run away every damn time I try to bring this up.”

“Yes, I can.” He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a cigarette and lighter. “Now get in the fucking car.”

I stood my ground. “Why won’t you just let me say it?”

“There’s nothing for you to say.” He took a long drag, the smoke he blew out circling his face.

“What are you afraid of?”

“I’m not afraid of anything, alright?” His voice was starting to rise.

“You don’t have to say it back.” I made sure to lower my own speech, not wanting to start a fight with him. That wasn’t how you won Billy over. “I won’t be upset if you don’t.”

“Just fucking drop it, Stacy.” His fists clenched as the anger and frustration grew inside of him. He wanted to lash out, but I knew he wouldn’t. “Get in the car. I’m taking you home.” He opened the driver’s side door, the force making it swing open wide.

“I love you, Billy Hargrove!” I shouted before I could change my mind. “I love you and you’re just going to have to deal with it.”

He slammed the door shut, the car shaking. “Fucking christ, Stacy.”

“Why won’t you just let me say it?” I took a tentative step towards him. “Just let me love you.”

“Because,” he groaned, inhaling his cigarette again. “I’m not the kind of guy you fall in love with.”

“I’d beg to differ.”

“Fuckin’ drop it, Stacy. Please.”

“No. Not until you talk to me, Billy.” I grabbed his hand and was surprised when he didn’t pull away. “I promise I won’t be mad at whatever you’re thinkin’.”

He didn’t say anything for a long moment. I was starting to worry that he wasn’t going to say anything at all. His voice came out shaky when he finally spoke. “You’re so fuckin’ good, Stacy.”

“You are too, Billy.”

He shook his head. “I’m not.” He pulled his hand from mine. “Get in the car or I’m leaving you here.” He opened the car door again and got in quickly. I just stood there, staring at him through the windshield. As a threat he started the ignition and pressed the gas. The roar of the engine filling the quiet forest.

When I didn’t move, I saw him slam his palms against the steering wheel. I could vaguely hear his scream of frustration as he pounded the wheel again. His blonde hair flying around his face. Looking up at me, he collapsed back into his seat, defeated. Taking a long drag of his smoke he hit the steering wheel one last time for good measure. He then turned the car back off, opened the door and got out, flicking his now finished smoke to the ground. “What the fuck do you want from me?”

“I want you to be honest with me. I want you to stop pretending like you don’t care when you do.”

“What do you want me to say? That I look forward to seeing you every day? That I can’t stop thinkin’ about you? That you’re the only thing keeping me going in this shithole of a town?”

“If that’s how you feel, then yes,” I replied.

“Fine! That’s how I feel, okay? I fucking love you, Stacy, and goddamn I hate myself so fucking much for it!” He was pacing and pulling at his hair.

“Why do you hate yourself?” I asked quietly, trying not to upset him further.

“Because,” he sighed deeply, “because I don’t deserve to have someone like you in my life.” My heart broke for him. The pain so clearly on his face. “I destroy everything, Stacy. I don’t want you to be a part of that.”

In a few quick steps I was at his side, wrapping my arms around his middle. He hesitated for only a moment before hugged me back, burying his face into the crook of my neck. My hair a little cushion around him. “I love you, Billy,” I said again. “You don’t get to choose who I want, okay? That’s up to me. And I want you.”

“I love you so fuckin’ much,” he mumbled. His voice broke and his body started to shake. His grip on me tightened as he softly cried. “Please don’t leave me.”

“I’m not going anywhere, baby.” I clung to him harder, trying my best to give him the reassurance he needed. “I promise.”

Tags: @lancsnerd @teddybeardoctorr

#bipspooky19 #billy x reader #billy hargrove smut #billy x stacy #billy hargrove x ofc #stranger things fic #billy x you

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johnmurphysreddit · 5 years ago

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Despite seeming like a fandom old I’m actually fandom middle aged. I joined online fandom when AO3 was still invite only with far less content than FFN and Tumblr was just taking over from LJ / Dreamwidth. I’ve never done a kinkmeme. Until now. A primer on the currently running The 100 Kinkmeme under the cut from someone who was clueless about the whole thing 48 hours ago. (TL;DR: Dreamwidth doesn’t suck to use as much as it seems to at first glance)

Q. What’s a kinkmeme?

A. Anon prompt and fills event. This one is The 100 focused and happening on Dreamwidth.

Q. What’s a fill??

A. Writing a story that satisfies someone’s prompt. There are also requests for art. I don’t think they’ve written a specific answer on aesthetic sets but it’s not like someone is going to be mad to get more fuel for their fantasy.

Q. I don’t write fic.

A. No problem. Read the prompts and enjoy. Write a prompt and share the power of your imagination. Someone else might have the same fantasy and write it for you or some stranger may obsess about your fantasy for the next year and you’ll never know it. Kinky. There are also some replies that are just “OMG YES!”. Enthusiastic support of a scenario is part of the event.

Q. I’m not starting another social media account for this.

A. You don’t have to. More on this below.

Q. Is this just 9 pages of Bellarke and 4 Murphamy posts?

A. Not entirely, but yeah, there’s a lot of Bellarke. You could change the percentage by participating. Also they’re up to 24 pages of prompts after 24 hours. I haven’t seen this much content this fast in this fandom without an episode airing. Tis a nice change.

Q. I read some prompts and now I need brain bleach.

A. I feel your pain. YKINMK means your kink is not my kink. It’s an old fandom standard, and this is an old fandom type event. There’s going to be some hard pass stuff in there for most people. You don’t have the right to know who’s using kink to process past trauma and who’s just into some off the beaten path kink. Live and let live.

Q. Some of those posts shouldn’t exist!

A. I feel the same way about boxing and war, but here we are. Nancy Friday’s My Secret Garden came out in 1973 and people are still acting shocked that women have some dark fantasies, many of which they almost certainly would never want to come true. No RP fic requests for people under 18 is the only hard line this thing seems to have, so complaining to the mods is a non starter. Find something elsewhere that suits you. This event isn’t to your taste.

Q. I get off on fluff. Is that kinky?

A. I can’t tell you how sexy a man who does the dishes is because I’m too busy wiping my drool off the table. The mods have said that while smutty smut is more typical non smutty prompts are OK.

Q. Back to fandom specific concerns. How much Echo/Lexa/Emori hate is in this thing? If I’m pro those characters am I welcome in this event?

A. Too much hate, but that’s this fandom. Ignore the haters and/or write glorification fics that will annoy them. There’s also some prompt and antiprompt drama. The mods have promised to delete anti posts, but I don’t know who the mods are or what their standard for anti is. Most people participating so far seem to be aware of the Don’t Be a Dick standard even if a few are trying pretty hard to smudge the line and call it a fantasy. You aren’t an anti just by existing and they’ve said it’s open to all ships. That standard applies in reverse, too, so if someone needs a villain for their prompt to work and they pick your fave for it... sigh.. the active part of this fandom is just skewed Like That... It’s been 7 years...

Q. I feel like starting some drama.

A. Try here.

Q. Is this thing racist / sexist / homophobic / other concern?

A. The thing, no. Some of the prompters and fillers, probably. The stats at the end depends on who prompts and fills.

Q. I’m just not up for a single moment of ship war nonsense.

A. The 100 kinkmeme Tumblr has a link to a script you can use to block certain words. It’s one of those times when you may need to block an entire character. Maybe participate by posting your own prompts and skewing the stats. It’s not free of shipwar nonsense because it’s not free of shippers.

Q. Anything I need to know about posting prompts?

A. There are some required tags, your standard old school TW list. dub-con, non-con/rape, incest, underage, necrophilia, gore, bestiality and RPF. After posting some prompts I realized I should have done more keyword stuffing so the search is more likely to pull a prompt. Using both Echo/Bellamy and Becho or all of soft, sweet, gentle, other synonyms is kind to a person who may need to find your prompt again.

Q I just want to search the prompts for my fave.

A. Here: https://the100kinkmeme.neocities.org/jan20prompts.html Unfortunately searching the complied list of prompts for Echo gets you a concentrated dose of hate, so I can’t recommend doing that.

Q. Show me the whole thing.

A. Main page is here. If you decide to post a prompt click the reply button under the arrows and above the page numbers. (I’m on laptop right now. If it looks different on mobile, sorry.)

Q. I wrote a thing. Now what?

A. You can anon post your fill on Dreamwidth as a reply if you want. Use your own AO3 account and add it to the Anonymous collection to make it post on AO3 as anon or start a sock puppet (a secondary account) on the hoster of your choice (including AO3) and post your fic there then add it to the anon collection if you’re really concerned about privacy. Then post a link to it in the kinkmeme as a reply. Use the prompt search so you can find the post you want to reply to.

Q. What’s the deal with the focus on anon.

A. When everyone uses it no one is weird for using it. You can take your fic out of the anon AO3 collection and claim it after the event.

Q. Isn’t this whole thing weird?

A. Whispering fantasies to your friends in the dark is how bonds are formed. Walking up the the cashier in Target and announcing that you want to bend her over the display of oranges is creepy. Keep fandom in its corners and if the actors choose to hunt out those corners that’s on them. People have been sharing fantasies about fictional characters since well before the Tale of Genji and fantasizing about celebrities since the first king toured a village.

#fandom #kinkmeme

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telesthisia · 5 years ago

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(No reblogs! Make a new post please!)

|| The Basics ||

Name: Zelda of Hyrule Nickname(s): Zel, Zellie, Elle, Ellie Age: 19 Species: Human or well Hylian

|| Personal ||

Religious Belief: The three golden goddess + Hylia but... she’s known as the forgotten goddess in her timeline since certain legends faded away from the public’s knowledge but not at all the royal family’s. Sins: Lust / Greed / Gluttony / Sloth / Pride / Envy / Wrath Virtues: Chastity / Charity / Diligence / Humility / Kindness / Patience /Justice Primary Goals In Life: To create a brighter future for her people for generations on end, leading to the eventually famed Golden Age before the Hero of Time’s downfall... though Hyrule has recovered once she’s born there are still remnants of ruin from that era as such she wants to protect her people as well as make Hyrule safer, while she doesn’t do it within her lifetime because limited lifespan her dream does still come true years later aka LOZ and LOZ 2 don’t be fooled by the plot, Hyrule was in its prime during those games! Languages Known: Hylian Secrets: Well... it’s no secret among her staff but outside the castle, she keeps her poor health (heart condition and undiagnosed rare anemia problem) and near lack of magical stamina a secret since that can put her at a pretty bad disadvantage. She has plenty of enemies, namely those who align themselves with Ganon and the resurrection of him is still possible provided the person is a powerful mage with knowledge of doing that sort of stuff in the first place. And then there’s also court drama she has to worry about but that’s for another long lengthy headcanon post I should have out... soon... ish. Also while obvious with partners and in a meta sense and if you’re super observant but her guise Elle is, in fact, her, the princess of Hyrule so... ye... Quirks: Her birthmark of the Triforce is... certainly unique. But if we’re talking mannerism rather than physical then allow me to just ramble because hoo boy! When nervous or worked up, she often tucks her stray hairs behind her ears, even when she’s not feeling those emotions she’s always fiddling around with it (in her royal wear) often flipping it out of her face or trying to make it look a little neater. She has the Pendant of Courage, a gift from Link and often clutches on it when she feels the need to summon her courage if she’s feeling not that brave, often trying to recall Link’s courage during his many adventures. When using any of her PSI powers she tends to have a nose bleed, as such, she often carries around a handkerchief and tries to cover it up before going off somewhere to stop the bleeding. When laughing, she likes to hold her smile behind her hand... and when yawning she tries to cover her mouth. SHE IS THE WORST COOK TO EVER EXIST holy crap but can make mean cookies. When flirting (more like embarrassed flirting pft) she looks away to the side and twirls her hair around her finger trying to hide her red cheeks. Her romantic out view on life stems from the fact that she was constantly surrounded by death and history and art so there’s morbid beauty in the melancholy... this girl gets excited over Friday the 13th and samhain ok like... there’s a lot to unpack with that. THERE’S MORE BUT I’VE RAMBLED FAR ENOUGH!!! Savvies: Well... she bakes pretty good cookies BUT UH!!! YEAH she’s pretty proficient with her light magic! While she can’t do the amazing things other Zeldas can do because of limitations she’s not someone you would want to mess around with. She’s learned to work around those limitations and has great control over her powers. On top of that, she somehow knows how to use a crossbow so :’) while not the light arrows (she’s too weak to wield a bow) and it was a lucky shot she at least knows enough about how it works to fire it in the first place. She reads a lot, even as a kid she’d sneak off to the library to read the history about Hyrule or read maps and well she’s pretty knowledgable about her nation as a whole! And thanks to sneaking out she knows how to sneak past the guards and knows all of the secret passages in her castle like the back of her hand! Can’t forget her amazing political insight and ability to think outside the box! She has pretty innovative ideas for her times esp when concerning the common folk, but sometimes they don’t always go through because well... nobles.

|| Physical ||

Height: 5′0″ Weight: you never ask a lady her weight! >:0 Scars/Birthmarks: Has a cat scratch scar on her right palm which is also where the triforce is located! Abilities/Powers: Light magic, as the descendant of the mortal goddess she has been blessed with the Light Force. On top of that she’s come from a line of sages and has the Triforce of Wisdom so as you expect she has so much magic. She can heal, bless your weapons, smite away darkness, sense darkness (As a matter of fact she’s pretty sensitive to it and it makes her lowkey sick if it’s too much) and then there’s her PSI abilities which includes clairvoyance and telepathy! And then... her connection to the spirit realm. Restrictions: AHAHAHA SO MUCH, she’s a glass cannon which is why she’s so, so, so easy to kidnap in the first place. She may put up a fight but not for long, as such her tactics are always to make a distraction and then escape. But she has poor stamina and just a poor heart, she can’t really overexert herself without a) causing pain and b) passing the hell out which was common in her younger days. Using magic takes up a lot of stamina as shown in ALTTP esp with the more powerful spells, you need an amazing reserve to cast all of that and sadly while she has good control she doesn’t have good reserves. SOOOOOOO to fix this she always has to take medicine of magic. Mana blockage is a thing that can happen, more often than she’d like to admit which causes pain once again and makes using magic pretty hard. Now onto her telepathy and clairvoyance. While they sound useful there are restrictions on those as well, for one with telepathy while she can contact anyone so long as she finds their signature subconscious she doesn’t have to worry about distance too much so long as they are within her range which is... maybe more than 200 meters? I need to think about the range more because there are certain places where she can reach you and cannot but there’s def a range limit. She tends to get nosebleeds and headaches from using telepathy. Her clairvoyance is where she can see bits of the future, but they are very vague and hard to decipher and there’s always a chance of the future changing or not changing. As for her connection to the spirit realm, pretty much she can see dead people... in her dreams and there’s no way of shutting this power off she’s gotta deal with the horrors that is this realm. Now seeing spirits isn’t anything new in LOZ but contact to the spirit realm is something that’s implied that only royal family members can do... as implied by Zelda’s words in BOTW where she said her mom (or grandma??) could hear the voices of the spirit realm.

|| Favorites ||

Favourite Drink: Rose tea Favourite Pizza Topping: Basil... Favourite Color: Blue! Favourite Music Genre: She pretty much likes slow and relaxing music, piano comes to mind but *kayne shrug* Favourite Book Genre: Romance aHEM as a princess she doesn’t have time to read cheesy romance novels and fantasize about the day where someone riding on a white horse will sweep her off her feet and they ride off into the sunset never having to bear the burden of her heritage and responsibilities hahaha..... but history and folklore. She likes tragic stories that have bittersweet endings. Favourite Movie Genre: Fantasy, tragic tales, suspense, romance flicks Favourite Season: Spring Favourite Butt Type:

Favourite Swear Word: "Goodness me!” Favourite Scent: Forest scent, the fields, that ancient scent you smell when visiting old places, the smell of book pages Favourite Quote: “Time has stopped for me long ago.”

|| Fun Stuff ||

Bottom or Top:

Sings In The Shower: Yes!!! Well... rose soaked bathwater because she’s spoiled stupid by her castle staff and Impa but she’ll hum a tune here and there! Likes Bad Puns: Of course! She has the playfully innocent attitude so puns is right up her alley! Morality: Lawful / Neutral / Chaotic / Good / Gray / Evil Build: Slender / Scrawny / Bony / Fit / Athletic / Herculean / Babyfat / Pudgy / Obese / Other. Favourite Food: APPLES!!! Namely baked apples and more importantly apple strudel! Her nation is famous for having delicious apples that can help cure fatigue and even rise up stamina a bit! She’s very much a follower of “an apple a day keeps the doctor away” esp if that doctor keeps giving her bitter medicines. “Boss” Theme Music : Excuse me for using a sad track... but... sAD MUSIC HONESTLY SHE’S DEPRESSION PERSONIFIED!! It reflects her hidden melancholy for like everything. I feel like if you have to fight her as a boss it’ll be more of a beautifully sad moment than something epic like that boss fight with puppet zelda which slaps honestly. Their Opinion On The Mun: “Does she thrive on my pain?”

Was tagged by: no one

Tag 15 People: wHO EVER WANTS TO DO THIS

#OK THIS TOOK LONGER THAN IT SHOULD HAVE #because i ramble so much listen i have a lot of headcanons #dash games.#about.

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jj-lynn21 · 5 years ago

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A little extra for the extra

I came up with this story recently after reading an article about how many actors have dated co-stars and back ground actors. Adam Sandler even married the extra in one of his movies. So its possible. Of course its highly unlikely but it was a fun story idea. I didn’t use any specific actor for this story so you can fill in the names you want. I’m going to tag a bunch of names that it could be. Yes I know some are not single but for this story they are so no guilt. If you like it I can write more than one chapter but ending where I do is fine also.

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It was your first time on a movie set. You internalized your excitement so you were not thought of as just some fan girl trying to get closer to actors you respected. You were only brought on for some background scenes but that was still exciting to you. There were rules of course. No cellphones on set. No photos of any kind. Never post info about the movies you are filming on social media . Your scene could easily get cut anyway. And absolutely no talking to the actors unless of course they talk to you first. You were told by other background actors the odds of even working near a main actor wasn’t good anyway. Still you were booked in this film with some of your favorite actors and you are almost vibrating with excitement each day you get to work on set.

Your first day on set was pretty awsome. You got to see the main actor from afar . Not the guy you were really there for but still pretty cool. You made friends with a PA who let you hangout and watch some scenes being filmed which you thought was really interesting. The gun firing blanks going off made you jump when it went off. It was way louder than you expected . when you had to run from that sound it was easy to jump up and go. You knew it wasn’t real but your body wasn’t so sure. Your heart jumped as you ran around the corner so you wouldn’t get shot.

You went where your handler told you. You stood where he told you. You never tried to get closer than you were allowed. On a particularly cold day, 42 degrees, you were put in a thin windbreaker and told to stand near a corner tree and wait for your walking scene. You were just neighborhood dressing really. If anything maybe a second blur. You are standing there with your co-actor who earlier showed you the pictures of himself in other movies. This was encouraging to you. You did remember seeing him. You are chatting with him and see main actor walking towards you.

Outside you are completely calm. Inside you are hyper. He is blocking his shot. You were put right in his path. He glances up, his set make-up makes him look very ill. He says, “hey” and pivoted to continue working. Your handler rushes over to have you move to stand a bit farther from scene. You happily watch the scene without complaining about the cold but you are freezing. Large outdoor heaters are brought out after the handler asks if you are cold and you say, “yes, a little “ as your teeth chatter a bit. Your co-actor says, “you want closer to the heat?” But you are way to interested in watching the scene to move from where you are standing. He really tries to insist you stand closer to the heater. You finally look up to him with a bit more excitement in your face and say, “I am perfect where I am. I can feel the heater just fine.” He finally gets it and chuckles a little.

You can feel the heat good enough. It’s even better when they set up another heater right in front of you. Then the main actor comes over freezing his ass off in a T-Shirt and track pants and tries to warm up by the heater. He looks you up and down. Grins slightly and says, “its fucking freezing out here isn’t it?” Not wanting to be rude of course you answer, “It is really cold.” You both bounce around a bit. Your insides are a bit excited. You hope your outside is calm and you don’t get in trouble for talking to him. You were just being polite. Someone yells they have a coat for him. Next you film your scene a few times before the it’s a wrap for the day.

The next day your scene is cut at the last minute but you still get to hangout and watch filming. The actor comes by you and others and says good morning to everyone. Everyone says, Good morning. It seems like most if not all the women’s voices have become like high pitched teens with some giggling as they say, “Good morning.” He looks to you and asks, “How are you.” You say, “It’s a good day.” And it was a good day of watching behind the scenes and chatting with other extras and Taco Tuesday for lunch. You have to enjoy the small good things in life. You weren’t used but you still got paid.

This has been the most fun job you have ever had. You have been in several scenes so you can’t imagine they will be able to use you again. When another day of filming comes to your attention you still apply and tell them all you have filmed so far. You get another call back to be on set for a big crowd scene. You think maybe this time your favorite actor will be filming with the main actor. You think you have been pretty cool so far but part of you isn’t sure if you will be able to keep so together if you see the man you really fantasize about. You have a new found respect for the main actor, but you really want your favorite sexy actor to give you a little attention when you see him.

You wear navy blue dress pants and a navy blue and white striped off the shoulder fitted shirt to this filming day. Since you have to bring two other options you pack a navy blue high-low dress and some Jean’s and a red, white and blue striped long sleeved shirt. You have your chunky navy blue heels on that will go with whatever outfit they desire you should wear. Only once have they given you something to wear from the costume department. It is definitely better to have options with you. This time they approve of what you are wearing so no quick changes before filming.

Todays scenes are at an air port. A section is closed down just for filming. Everyone sitting around are extras. Some, like yourself, are given a specific task. The crew, who have started getting use to you being on this movie set start calling you by name. It feels great when they say how perfect you look for todays scenes. The hair/make up person tells you how beautiful you look as she touches up your look and makes your hair look shinier. You know she says that to everyone but you thank her and smile. She goes around touching up several people in a short amount of time. Working quickly to get her job done.

The scene is explained to everyone .The assistant director says, “Everyone is waiting for loved ones to come off the plane who were in the military . You have not seen your family in one to three years. It’s a fantasy scene that the character hope’s will happen when he finally returns home with all his military brothers and sisters with him. The main actress will of course run over to our main actor. But since the character has no idea what his new military friends’ families look like some of you will be paired with our military actors to welcome them home. It’s great we have some real couples for this scene. (your name) I want you to run and greet the second soldier off this plane. The first will be our main actor and the main actress will greet him. Other background actors of the soldiers, run to your soldiers when you see them. The rest of you stay seated where you have been placed as if you are waiting on other flights. We will all clap when soldiers are reunited with family. Watch me for the go ahead to clap. Ok let’s do a run through when the director is ready.”

“Quiet on set. Action.” The main actor walks out of the tunnel like he just got off a plane. The main actress runs over and throws her arms around the main actor. You have some fake happy tears going as you start to see the next person step out of the tunnel. Inside you scream, “Fuck” as your favorite actor emerges. You use all that excitement to run to him. He picks you up easily. You wrap yourself around him and smile. He says, “I missed you so bad sweetness.” And plants a lip-lock on you. You kiss him back until they the Director yells, “Cut”.

Your heart is pounding as he puts you down slowly. He says, “Hi, I’m (your fav actor). I usually try to get to know the actress I make-out with before it happens, but they wanted to keep us out of sight from the gawkers lined up over there as long as possible. What’s your name?”

You manage to speak up and tell him your name. You try to breath normally. You say, “I guess the secret is out now.” You giggle to basically release some tension. He chuckles.

The assistant director says, “Ok that was a good run through. I hope if you didn’t already know each other you got to know each other better. (Your name & your fav actors name) you did great. We want a bit more passion from everyone. Louder applause.

The AD says, “Quiet on the set. Let’s move that barricade back a little farther. We will not be able to keep the fans quiet. Action.” As soon as you wrap yourself around him, he grabs your ass holding you up. He again says, “I missed you, sweetness.” He kisses you stronger this time and parts his lips. You kiss him back just as passionately your eyes closed as you run your fingers through his hair. The two of you don’t even hear the director say cut until he says your names. (Your fav actor) puts you down slowly as you look at him for a first reaction.

You know it is all just acting, and he has been doing this a lot longer than you but damn how can anyone not feel anything from this. You think this is probably why co-stars date for awhile after making a movie. Its easy to get wrapped up in the feelings your body is forced to have in the moment. You already had a crush on this guy. This scene is practically killing you in a good way.

He says, “I hope I wasn’t to handsy and It was ok to kiss you like that.”

You say, “Anything to get the scene to look good. You have my permission to do whatever the scene calls for here. You know this stuff more than I do. I’ll just follow your lead.”

He says, “Cool. You ok with me kissing you deeper then? We probably got a hundred more takes.” He chuckles a bit nervously.

You laugh but underneath all the coolness you are trying to exude your body is on fire. Your legs are weak, and you can’t believe what he just asked you. Of course, it ok for him to kiss you any way he wants. Even if it is just acting you have loved every minute of this shoot so far. You say, “It’s cool with me.”

The assistant director says, “Back to start places everyone. We are just going to roll a few takes without stopping when the director is ready.” The scene rolls. You and your fav actor get into each other more and more with each take. You are happy. You can barely catch your breath between resets of the scene. You can’t believe this is currently your life. You lose track of time completely. The director must tell the two of you to stop after he yells cut more than once. You blush a little. Your favorite actor whispers in your ear how cute it is when you are embarrassed by the director’s firm tone telling you two to cut when he says cut.

Lunch is called. The assistant director says, “Take the extras back to holding. We only need a few of them after lunch.”

You start to head out with the group. The PA comes up to you. He says, “You can stick around. We will need you after lunch anyway.”

You say, “cool” and turn around.

Your favorite actor motions for you to come over to him. You sit beside him. He says, “Can I buy you lunch?”

You answer, “sure.”

He says, “They will bring me whatever I want. I was just going to get a green tea latte and a panini from Starbucks.”

You say, “Cool I’ll take a chai latte and a ham & swiss panini.”

He snaps his fingers and a PA rushes over eagerly. He tells her what he wants for lunch. The other actors sit around the same area and over-hear where he is sending the PA. They all put in their order for her to bring back coffees, lunches and snack items.

The main actor looks over at you. He says, “You’ve been on this production several times, now haven’t you?”

You say, “Yes I have. I guess I’ve been lucky. It’s been a lot of fun.”

Grinning your favorite actor says, “Oh, so I’m not your first?”

Main actor says, “Oh, you are her first. We just froze together.” He laughs.

You said, “Yeah, it was freezing that one day. But the heaters worked so we didn’t freeze to death. I rather be shooting this scene any day.”

The main actor says, “I bet you would.”

You blush a little. The PA comes back with everyone’s lunch. You take a sip of your drink and break off a small bite of your sandwich to eat. Your favorite actor says, “not to sound like a line or something but are you from around here?”

You say, “I don’t live to far. It was a little over an hour drive this morning. One day of filming was a little under an hour.”

He says, “That’s not to bad. “

The two of you start to talk about family and friends and life in general and find out you have very similar background. Ok, you already knew you had similar backgrounds, but it was cool that some of the things you have read were true. You are now getting very comfortable chatting with him and the other actors around you. Then its time to go back to work. Best job ever.

The director comes over to say how he wants to set up the next shot and what you will be doing. He says, “As you each head towards where the crowd is over there we will fade out. Our main actor will finish his lines and we will be done for the day. Should only be an hour or so.”

A few more extras are brought in. Everyone takes their places. You run through the scene before cameras roll. As you walk hand and hand away from the main area the crowd goes wild the closer you and he get to them. You just keep a smile on your face. The director yells cut each time before you get to close to the crowd.

Some hold out pictures of the actors and pens so maybe they will get some signatures. Others attempt to take pictures but, their phones are grasped from their hands and pictures are deleted before their phones are given back and they are taken from the crowd. You have been on the other side of this and never acted that insane to get an autograph. Some of the people seemed a bit to crazy looking. You now knew why some actors are scared to start auto graphing pictures when there is a crowd like this. It gets scary quickly. Your favorite actor gaves them a little nod each time the scene was film. He took your hand to kiss each before each cut was yelled. Then back to your mark. After about three hours and multiple camera angle changes including one where the camera was pointed directly at you two as you walked away, the director says, “It’s a wrap.”

Your favorite actor picks you up and swings you around. He says, “Its been a good shoot today. I’m so glad I met you sweetness.” He kisses you and you instinctively wrap yourself around him. He eventually puts you down. You realize this was not a scripted moment. You are kind of in shock. He takes your hand and pulls you over to the side.

He says, “I’m sorry. I just got carried away. I hope you don’t want to charge me with being a predator. I know that’s common place now a days, but I wasn’t meaning to…”

You say, “Hold on. There is no need to panic. I’m fine. I was kissing you back just as much as you were kissing me. I’m fine.”

He says, “Oh good. So um, can I get your number in my phone? Maybe if you want, we can hangout a little more tonight. I have a few people to meet and reporters to talk to, but I should make it out of here in an hour.”

He hands you his phone. You put your number in his contacts list under Cherry Sweetness. You show him and he chuckles. You say, “I have to get back to holding to pick up my things before making it to my car. That will take me about and hour or so. If I hear from you very cool. If I don’t know big deal its been fun. You leave him. Heading out with the other extras to catch a shuttle to holding to get your things and maybe you will head home.

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bthump · 5 years ago

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madchen replied to your post “Let's say Griffith was kinda aware of his feelings. What kind of...”

omg the razing falconia one... these are all so good especially the fact that griffith would have cliche dubcon fantasies about enemy warlord guts fucking him. like he wants it but he wants guts to take it from him so he doesn’t have to make that choice, and irl guts would never do anything like that to griffith which is why it’s so good. and griffith would try so hard to not bring emotions into it but he’s def finished once while accidentally imagining guts telling him “i love you”- and it fucked him up good afterwards. doooo you have any thoughts on like flip side guts fantasies involving griffith? like canon, post eclipse, au where they get together, any spin really? i think guts is way more like, sweet and vanilla in his imagination than griffith (tho griffith is vanilla too just more active imagination) + idol more basic? but man…he’s just so canonically focused on griffs physical beauty and says some romantic ass shit it’s gotta be saccharine and ridiculous sometimes griffith def fantasizes about like, calling guts to his tent and complimenting him on being an Excellent Soldier or whatever and “rewards” him via a blowjob. or like corny gay porn scenario where griffith makes that “wow what a big sword i wouldn’t be able to handle it” comment he makes in the ovas that leads to like griffith jerking him off of w/e

God like I wish I had the ability to start and then finish a fic because I feel like Guts and Griffith’s fantasies about each other would make a great series of character studies lmao. Like Griffith coming when he accidentally thinks about Guts telling him he loves him and then being out of sorts all day, that’s solid stuff right there.

Also ngl that “it’s an amazing sword, I could never wield it” line (which is also in the manga actually, tho the ova adds a suggestive sword movement so credit where it’s due) is such a perfect cliche porn intro, it would be tragic if it never featured in either of their fantasies.

As for Guts’ fantasies... during the Golden Age honestly I don’t think his fantasies would’ve ever got further than imagining leaning in and brushing Griffith’s hair back during the staircase Zodd conversation, or something like that. Coming back from his dream journey, meeting Griffith again as his equal, embracing him in a manly fashion, aaaaaand then his mind trails off and he gets moody and scowly for no apparent reason. It’s really hard for me to imagine him as self aware about wanting to fuck Griffith back then.

Tho maybe in the very early days he’d think about it, yk not long after he asked Griffith if he was gay, offered sex as stakes for the duel, and got all “commander Griffith, are you trying to seduce me” before the naked waterfight. But I don’t think he’d make the connection between wondering about it and wanting it at that point. And I feel like once he started considering Griffith his friend those thoughts would mostly fade. And if the question of sex with Griffith popped into his head again later on it would be with a bit of exasperation and bemusement, rather than any longing (that he’s aware of). So less a fantasy and more of an occasionally recurring stray thought that he doesn’t want to consider too closely.

He would’ve started thinking about sex as a real option, at least one he could’ve/should’ve pursued in the past, about 20 minutes after realizing he shouldn’t’ve left at the end of chapter 71, but then the Eclipse happened and he had other things to think about lol.

But I think Guts definitely, like honestly very nearly canonically as far as I’m concerned, started fantasizing about him properly after NGriff’s resurrection.

Like you’re gonna look at this page and tell me Guts did not jerk it while picturing this that very night?

Please. Let’s be reasonable here.

Throw in the Beast of Darkness’ taunts about Guts dreaming about Griffith and longing for him and Guts’ urge to get “closer and closer to Griffith” through a sexual act, and I consider this reading a pretty easy sell lol.

Anyway at this point Guts’ fantasies about Griffith would be a wildly confusing and painful mashup of regret and longing for the past and just replaying moments with Griffith in his head imagining actually going for it and kissing Griffith and having sex with him and never ruining anyone’s life, and like dark and violent fantasies about NeoGriffith. Like lbr here we already saw eroguro shit with Casca thanks to the Beast of Darkness, that style of dark is a shoe-in.

To get more detailed wrt the former, at this point I feel like Guts is aware that Griffith loved him. It’s not something he often wants to think about because it makes him sad and confused, but he knows it. A dude doesn’t destroy his own life and spend a year in a torture chamber after you leave him just because you’re his bff. He knows that there’s a good chance if he kissed Griffith back then, Griffith would’ve wanted it and everything else Guts could give him.

Guts would imagine kissing him during a night of like victory celebrations or w/e and having tender emotional sex in one of their dark tents. He’d imagine kissing him and sucking him off against a tree after the ‘do you think i’m cruel’ conversation to demonstrate exactly how he sees Griffith. He’d imagine bending Griffith over the desk in his study, lying together with him as Griffith reads one of his books, bathing together and getting playful in the water, fighting back to back and fucking after emerging victorious, Griffith saving his life and then kissing him passionately in a thank-god-you’re-alive way. Griffith lying on top of him, leaning down to kiss him with his hair falling around Guts’ head like a curtain. Griffith telling him about Gennon and telling Guts how good and unlike him or any other monster he is.

Not realistic but yk emotionally true, maybe strolling right up the Promrose Hall steps and kissing Griffith in front of Charlotte to directly and smugly challenge his speech, leaving him dazed and needy and staring at him like he’s the only thing in the world. Guts would imagine that focused gaze a lot in hindsight, after missing its significance at the time.

Ooh and Guts would have a few fantasies of Griffith watching him and jerking off to him. Like he’d fantasize about Griffith fantasizing about him. “I found someone I really wanted to have look at me,” come on. He wants to be wanted so bad.

Oh and speaking of that, a lot of his dark present-day fantasies would involve forcing NGriff to look at him and acknowledge him. And like, that could easily veer into sad angst too, imagining seeing glimpses of his Griffith through NGriff’s mask while he’s fucking him and/or stabbing a sword through him or whatever else, that kind of thing.

Liiiiike Guts is a giant mess at this point of the story, it’s perfect for cramming in all this wildly emotional stuff lol. He’s having a bad time psychologically and this mix of tenderness and regret and painful emotional truths and neediness and loneliness and rage and violence and hatred and love, man, it could all manifest through this longing for Griffith.

Oh and finally in like, say an AU where they got together during the Golden Age and lived happily ever after, a lot of the human Griffith fantasies would still apply like yk Guts getting off to Griffith getting off to him, life-saving, fighting together, etc.

But I think Guts in that situation would also have some possessive fantasies as well, especially if he’s feeling a little neglected while Griffith pursues his dream. Leaving mild marks and bruises so Griffith thinks about him throughout the day, fantasizing about teasing him so he’s uncomfortably turned on before a meeting with nobles or something, maybe more out there, unrealistic fantasies like having the ability to touch him from a distance or being invisible and (consensually imo) caressing him while he’s socializing at a ball until Griffith’s poker face breaks (but no humilliation kink, that wouldn’t be Guts’ style, the fantasy would just end at that point imo), yk that kind of thing.

Also if he hasn’t heard the Promrose Hall speech, after a while of having regular sex with Griffith I think he’d probably be somewhat into the idea of v mild d/s with Griffith giving orders. More praise kink than anything, like Griffith telling him exactly how he wants to be fucked or blown in a moderately commanding way, and Guts doing it and Griffith being very vocal in his appreciation, telling him how good he is. I feel like I just described a sex scenario more than a fantasy, but yk Guts could imagine it for a while before doing it, and I feel like Griffith would actually not be into that so it might stay a fantasy.

And he’d fantasize about Griffith fucking him for a while before he got the nerve to ask him to.

Ok that’s all I got for now, ty for asking and giving me the opportunity to write another giant post about griffguts sexual fantasies lol. lmk if you have any more thoughts on this!

#madchen #replies #headcanons #a #b #lol i'm going to be pretty busy for the next couple days so i'm just going to queue this for tomorrow #and a few asks as well #i normally like to be online when i post actual content instead of just reblogging but w/e if there are responses i'll see them #in the evening when i get home. answering stuff is a good way to unwind lol #character thoughts

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 6 years ago

Text

Palm Reading + Mandarin | Fostered Writing Update

Hey People of Earth!

It’s been *years* since I wrote my last writing update, and seeming as though I have some time to draft this, I thought I’d pop another one your way!

This update is going to cover the writing haps from FOSTERED!

The last FOSTERED update I posted was in October, so here’s a summary of what’s happened in the last few months:

I drafted Palm Reading and Dark Room from October to November

^ And then never wrote anything in December

Literally had a crisis

What’s New

These last few chapters of this book were not happening? I’ve probably drafted a total of four chapters this entire semester because of how little time I have to write, which isn’t fun. I was having a hard time balancing writing for school, and writing for myself, so my book definitely suffered a lil bit.

In terms of plot summary, the squad has been at a cabin in Oregon for the last few weeks. I’ve translated this to literally only two chapters, however, it will physically pain me to keep writing in this setting, so I’m moving on! The first chapter I’ll be updating you on is called Palm Reading.

I mentioned in my last FOSTERED update that this book is currently split into two parts: part one being tentatively titled ‘Children’. PALM READING is the first chapter of part two, and also, the first full chapter at The Cabin. In my last update, I talked about the squad arriving at the cabin. I thought I’d flesh this out more in this update! (Also: I’m hoping to make a 3D model of the cabin in the future--I already have all the blueprints!)

The cabin is owned by Lonan’s (deceased) father, and is now inhabited by Reeve + Lonan’s sister, Christiane, who now goes by Anna. Bad Things happen at this cabin, which is why I’m swinging out early! PALM READING is split into five scenes:

All you have to know: the squad has travelled across the universe to cheer Lonan up because he’s going through some Tough Times. This is, of course, a very bad idea.

Scene A:

This scene is a flashback Reeve recounts of her and her sister as children before their mother’s fancy garden party.

Scene B:

Reeve makes French onion soup for Lonan in an attempt to cheer him up. Her estranged mother, Izzy, tries to help, to no avail.

Tbh, this scene could be cut lol. It’s very short, and not super interesting in my opinion! Though I’m not very fond of this chapter in general.

Scene C:

Lonan doesn't like Reeve’s soup (apparently this whole chapter is just soup?? we should just call it soup???), and dissociates when he encounters Anna’s son. He gets a lil violent and Darren steps in to save ze day (a valiant boi).

Fun fact: I wrote an entire mini story with Lonan and Harrison, recounting the aftermath of this encounter (see more below ;))

Scene D:

Anna and Reeve hang on the porch, and Reeve fantasizes about what her life would be like if her sister was still in her life beyond childhood.

Scene E:

Reeve leaves her sister on the porch and her and Darren have some timezzzzzz.

Fun fact:

This chapter was originally called just PALM before I started writing this update. I wasn’t mega happy with the title, but I like it a lot more as this expansion!

Yo dis chapter the whole alphabet or what?? I’m not particularly happy with it because it’s not cohesive at all?? I found I wrote a ton of tiny lil scenes that didn’t fit together very well, lol. I think if I cut the scene breaks and integrated the chapter into three bigger scenes, this would’ve been a lot more effective. The reason most of these scenes are so tiny, is because I believe I wrote this chapter over a very long period of time. I find if I leave a chapter for too long between breaks, it just isn’t very good since I lose a lot of momentum.

Excerpts:

I’ll share the whole first scene! Not my *favourite* scene but is ok:

Izzy made it clear it was a garden party, even though we didn’t have a garden. She’d rewritten her plans on her toile stationary from Paris, and pinned the leaflets to the fridge so the neighbours would think she looked rich. She bought a red check pinafore from the Goodwill and pretended it was designer. Her panty hose were sheer and black and made her look like an off-brand prostitute.

The neighbours would be in by three. Christiane and I set the table with the good cutlery, and hung Chinese lanterns from the doorways. Izzy lit the tea lights and peeled the carrots over the sink.

Before the guests arrived, Christiane and I played out by the marsh. We hopped puddles and skipped rocks. We practiced our Spanish in ruled notebooks even though Izzy enrolled us in French. We caught crickets and brown-bellied spiders in bug boxes, and ate crackers and deli meat, and the leftover frog legs Izzy bought from the bistro. The Tupperware sweat with chervil and nutmeg. She said, Evie, it tastes just like chicken you know, like that somehow made a difference. Izzy yelled at us for scraping our knees when we got back home. The neighbours are going to think I have savages for children. Do you know how mothers with savages for children look?

She made us wash our hair with castile soap, and pinned it back in matching chignons. She dressed Christiane in a tartan smock, and me in a tunic and skirt. She was twelve, I was ten. Izzy pulled her hair into two Dutch braids, and tied off the ends with bits of ribbon from the Christmas wrapping drawer. Dad came home from work late, and said, Izzy, baby, you’re looking so new age, and she cried and had to reapply her lipstick.

Scene two, three, and four are like, not good, lol, so skipping to scene five!

Scene five gets a lil steamy yeepers--keeping it PG, but just a warning:

You are a system of constellations—all blinking and in order. A life sized Orion, all neon Alnitak, Alnilam, Mintaka.

Putting this in for the Darren Roast (also lol look @ me just switching POVs):

You’re so je ne sais quois, you’re so candied and virgin, you’re so liberal, it hurts. You kiss me like we’re dating, and maybe we are. Maybe I’m your girlfriend, and you’ll take me to Thanksgiving at your mother’s, and your family will love me, and serve me cranberry sauce and tofurkey and kefir from mason jars.

That’s it for PALM READING!

The chapter I wrote after palm reading is called Dark Room. I briefly mentioned it in a vlog I’m compiling, however, I’m skipping out on writing an update on it because a) nothing is really shareable, and b) the content is kind of too difficult to explain/sift through!

The last thing I wanted to share was this lil adventure I wrote in October called Mandarin.

MANDARIN is a short-somethin (story??? i say lightly) following the events of PALM READING, and covers Lonan and Harrison in a tent in the woods. ;) I hesitate to call it a story because it’s more just me being a shit disturber to see what I can mess up in my book in a different point of view. ;)

I can’t remember why I wanted to write this, lol. I think it’s just because I was feeling a lil stressed, and writing with my boys is always very fun. I knew things went very wrong for Lonan at the end of PALM READING, so I wanted to take some time to experiment with what exactly happened that the reader doesn't get to see.

The premise is: Harrison is being *nice* and offers to help Lonan fix his face after Darren comes in like Godzilla for his lil noggin, and things Go Wrong.

(Also: at this point, I’ve written three *shippy* stories with these boyz, and I’ve made it my duty to compile a lil anthology of *ship* and print it out and put it on my shelf. ;))

Excerpts:

I really only included this segment because of this paragraph, not even that I love it, but because Harrison always describes Lonan with such an acute awareness to detail and its soooooooo cuuuuute:

Tangles of dark hair part down Lonan’s scalp, and drift into Harrison’s eyes. It’s getting long, now. He hasn’t had a trim in months. Harrison can measure the days since, like a personal calculator. He’s been paying attention. It’s two inches past his eyes. He hasn’t cut it since April. His skin is white, like the ivory tusks of an elephant, or the swirl of half and half. His eyes marbles of aquamarine, like an expensive China doll. Harrison would import copies and hoard them. Even though he’s bruised around the eyes, the skin puffy, and purple, he’d display him and tell everyone he’s handmade from Russia.

same

Alrighty folks, that’s it for this update! I’m almost finished an update for a new short story, so keep an eye out for that! My semester finishes on Wednesday, so prepare to see me clutterin’ up your feed in the near future!

--Rachel

#fostered #writing #amwriting #writingupdates #writerblr

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roominthecastle · 6 years ago

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A ‘bullet point text reaction’ post thing to the season premiere would be forking good. If you can spare the time in between all the rewatching and RL, which again might be messin with the rewatching. Ps. sexy librarian ftw.

Apologies for the late reply, anon, and thank you for the interest. I gave it a try but apparently I had a lot more rambling in me than expected, so I’m not sure how much the bullet point format will help. Still, I rolled w/ it behind the cut:

obv spoilers ahead for those who haven’t seen + it’s mostly Michael focused but who is surprised at this point? ok, here we go:

Yes. All hail the Sexy Librarian Guy! 👍

and his ~~flawless~~ Australian accent lmao. I am no native speaker but even I could hear it was just… delightfully off. I love this disaster zone demon so much.

and how pleased he was that Eleanor was pleased w/ that particular “intervention”. It’s a small but nice reminder of how making her happy makes him happy now. #oppositeTorturesRule

it’s a v small thing but I also loved the “fast food link”: Michael being ecstatic about the Pizza Hut/Taco Bell combo & Eleanor fantasizing about Chipotle during Chidi’s lecture on Aristotle. It reminded me of that s1 moment when she tells Michael about those Arizona churro dogs and they both just go ahhhhhhhh at the image + Judge Gen ofc (they love fast food in the afterlife)

also also the sweet ache of Michael being entangled in her ticker tape while insisting on nudgy-nudge-nudge her & Chidi together bc that’s how it should be is still pressing hard on my heart thank you v much

but

I think that being deprived of close contact w/ his humans is causing Michael to slide back into puppet master mode again. His motivation is different or “reformed” now (secretly helping instead of secretly torturing) but his methods, his itch to control everything (and failing), and the rigid focus on his goals are… not so much, imo, and I love it bc this is Michael: he is a nerd but also an idiot w/ Wile E. Coyote vibes. Janet tries to reel him in but she can’t. Eleanor was the only one who could control him and she was the only one whose advice he actively sought and listened to, but she cannot be there for him now, so yes, I am getting a lot of S1 vibes from this double ep complete w/ her unintentionally messing w/ his formula by not falling for Chidi & the arrival of Trevor. *rubs hands*

COCOONS

so many

so… squishy

and TODD! I never thought I would see him so soon but I was right: he is the best lava monster and fork you, Shawn, for being a jerk to him when he was nothing but supportive and even brought you guys Dunkin’ Spiders to snack on.

I love Shawn, he is the perfect baddie, and I love that we got another glimpse into how TBP operates w/ all their excruciatingly low-tech gadgets. It’s in sharp contrast to (even Michael’s fake) TGP where everything is so neat, efficient, and high-tech. It’s another nice reminder of how the torturers are also being made miserable in TBP in various ways. I can’t blame Michael for wanting to keep his failing experiment running as long as possible.

Judge Gen (who continues to be a delight and way too relatable w/ her binge-watching of media content) is so up to something, people. I cannot shake this feeling that this whole “Operation Resurrection” is not what it looks like on the surface at all. Maybe it’s an experiment within an experiment sort of deal. I mean, why does she trust Michael of all creatures w/ the monitoring duty at all?? She might be quirky but she is def not stupid. She must know he’s a natural rule breaker who’s incapable of sitting still for longer than 2 seconds and he’s not at all impartial here. The way she set this all up reminds me of the test she gave Jason, and Michael is already failing just like Jason did bc he couldn’t opt out of “playing” due to lack of impulse control and a massive personal bias regarding his favorite team, the Cockroaches. idk what this will mean long-term but I think he’s gonna be in a lot of trouble soon.

speaking of Jason and Michael: theirs is my favorite (sort of bonding) scene, hands down. Again, it reminded me of an early S2 moment when Jason stumbles on a brooding, lost Michael and tells him a dope story about his 60-person dance crew that unexpectedly inspires Michael to seek out Eleanor & Co. The situations are reversed here but it’s an excellent parallel, esp when you compare the two scenes and see the development in both characters and their relationship. Jason is a bit more grounded and Michael is less dismissive and much kinder to him now. I also love Jason’s continued immunity to Michael’s b.s. It’s different from Eleanor’s (his is stupid-based and hers is about being smartbrained) but it works and pushes Michael to just level w/ him and the second he does, Jason becomes instantly receptive. It’s just a really really great character moment that also moves the plot, so it’s basically perfect. Also I think this is the moment when Michael is temporarily pulled from his puppet master mode due to being near one of his human friends again, and his other side peeks out as he lets himself rest a bit - it’s in his body language, too, as he leans back against the bridge railing and has a semi-honest chat w/ Jason.

Michael’s disguises are an eternal source of happiness to me. All of them (and based on promo pics, more is coming). I also love the way he approaches each human bc it is reminiscent of how he steered them during the reboots: to Eleanor he gave a small clue and just let her chew on it and work w/ it. W/ Chidi, he was more direct, posing as a wise helper/guide. W/ Tahani, he targeted her sense of self-worth. W/ Jason, he gave up after 5 seconds and just told him what he wanted him to do.

I doubt his aliases raised many eyebrows, tho, not in a universe where Simone has colleagues called Mrelk and Catapulp :D but Eleanor seemed to have a bit of a “hmm” reaction to the name of Dr. Charles Brainman, so… we’ll see.

Dr. Simone Garnett had probably the smoothest entry into an established character group, imo. I’m usually sensitive to changes like this but it’s like she’s always been here - another excellent casting choice right there. I am not gonna touch shipping issues, thank you, but I love how Simone’s presence, which is a lot of fun in itself, instantly enriched the landscape of relationship dynamics regarding the present, the future and also the past. I feel that every character combination exists somewhere in canon whether it’s explicitly on screen or not, and that’s just an incredibly freeing, resourceful attitude to have on a show w/ this sort of “multiverse” setup, imo. They have the premise, so why not milk its full potential? The writers use relationships as tools to aid character development, they have admitted as much already, and I am looking forward to seeing what other combos they have in mind and how they play out.

despite his limited screen time and despite him spending most of it being flat and emotionless, frog guy aka The Doorman managed to deliver the biggest punch in my heart w/ that reaction to Michael’s gift. I.crumbled. the way his flatness did when he saw the frog on the mug. Thank you, Mike O'Malley.

It’s probably a good thing that they are becoming buddies now bc w/ evil Trevor in the mix, Michael’s gonna turn that Earth entrance into a revolving door. Unless Judge Gen is onto him and steps in at some point. And I still don’t know how he will interact w/ the team now since they’ve all met him already and he was posing as a different person each time. And given his track record, whatever solution he comes up with, Eleanor will see right through him eventually anyway.

ok this is way too long already, so I’m just gonna say that I am very excited for this season, I love the new setup, I miss the fake Good Place but the university environment is growing on me fast, too, and just bring it, show, ok?

my body is ready

#anonymous #the good place #long post #michael tgp #speculation #room w/ a view

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