#like i am just existing
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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(ID in ALT text) ArtTrade with the very sweet @die-auster ! thank you for sparking back my obsession with this blue guy here!
Please check out their amazing works here! 1 . 2 . 3.
#atla#avatar kuruk#kuruk#ummi#dark water spirit#blue spirit#blue#blue is pretty much the closest i ever came to an oc the last years#but gosh i kinda like his attitude and that he mainly exist to make kuruks life harder then it already is#ummi is no help....#again big thank you to auster for being willing to do this trade with me!#their works were truly so amazing and it absolutely floored me#we agreed on only one drawing and the characters#but i guess the fun got ahead of us!#i am glad for that#jumping in my next dire deadline#also bit cruder drawings sorry about that...#also... uh... i didn'T esagerate the size difference between ummi and kuruk did i???#idk he just seems like a huge guy....#HE IS WEARING A POLARBEAR AS HEAD!!!!#he maybe not kyoshi size but like...still big guy right?!?!?
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You don't wish your disability was worse or more visible, you wish your disability was taken seriously. Please stop confusing the two, I guarantee you would not get the support you need JUST by being more severe or more visible. Please listen to visibly disabled people when we tell you it isn't better on our side
#m/cc#mine#I tried extremely hard to word this nicely because I KNOW people don't mean bad and often even know there are unique challenges#and believe me I know the challenges of invisible disability too!!#I have invisible disabilities!#but as someone who has also been at least visibly 'off' since they were 10 I am SO SICK of invisible disabilities being hailed as like#a unique extra oppression that us lucky visibly disabled people don't have to deal with#there are challenges to invisible disabilities that visibly disabled people DON'T have to deal with!#but you need to understand that *the reverse is also true*#there are MASSIVE benefits to being able to lie about your disability for example#or not dealing with the overt ableism that comes with your disability being obvious to everyone#*I do not have the option to pretend I'm not disabled.* that is never an option I have#I walk weirdly. I use a mobility aid now. my speech and face are 'off.' I lean to one side#for a long time I wore sunglasses 24/7 and often didn't make sense. I sometimes can't speak or won't react to others#for the most part people will always know that at the very least something is wrong with me#and more obviously I have people telling me they'll pray for me; telling me I can't do things I'm already in the process of doing;#wanting to shake my hand to tell me I'm an inspiration for not killing myself; giving me dirty looks for existing in public#and yes. I'm aware that this is very much an in-community issue. I know the average abled person doesn't know invisible disabilities exist#that's why there's so much awareness happening for it#but as a visibly disabled person I get SO TIRED of constantly hearing 'I wish my disability was visible :'('#it's just 'I wish I had your disability!' but from other disabled people
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buckle up lads we're going BACK INTO THE BOOK
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#(the origin of halloween huh) (oooh)#why yes i did wake up way too early to watch the stream and will have no memory of drawing this later#anyway THE MAGIC BOOK IS BACK TO EAT US ONCE AGAIN!!!!#this does make things make a lot more sense if it doesn't have to. y'know. actually take place in the established world#like how jack and sally are apparently just gonna be THERE as themselves WHY NOT#i'm certainly not complaining mind you#scully looks like he's gonna be super adorable and i love him already#spooky scary skeleman who just goes :O a lot and is excited for halloween#he seems like he might actually be more of a fusion of jack and sally? or maybe i'm just reading too much into it#still getting jazzy vibes off of him though. is not scully j graves an incredible jazz musician name.#does this open up the possibility that the last time we went into the book there was a sexy anime boy stitch just offscreen the whole time#...maybe some things are best left uncontemplated#god everyone in this event looks fantastic i'm so glad i saved up some keys after all#a little sad that there's no lilia but you know what the fact that a halloweentown malleus exists is still pretty dang good#and sebek's hat is SO tall#the biggest hat for the loudest boy#i hope oogie is here too i need him and jamil to meet#i need jamil to be faced with a guy who's just a bunch of bugs standing on each other's shoulders in a trenchcoat#i am not coherent right now i just needed to get this out before i go pass out again
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I can't keep being fundamentally changed as a person by animated movies, it's just not sustainable.
#animation#animated film#animated movies#across the spiderverse#across the spider-verse#spiderverse#puss in boots#puss in boots the last wish#puss in boots 2#nimona#nimona film#yes i'm posting this specifically because i just watched nimona and am feeling all kinds of things but really these are all PEAK TIER#the fact they have ALL been released within 7 months of each other...like...woah we are thriving right now#stylised animation with its own unique style reflecting the movie i love you forever kissing you on the mouth#films that make me ferally rip up any and all art blocks to shreds#and that's just the animation side of things#i won't get started on the plots. they also make me want to bounce off of walls#hugging all these close to my chest#as well as all the other great animated movies that exist because animation wins all catergories for me always#(let's not forget anime movies either; y'all are beautiful too! keeping 2d animation alive and i'm so here for it)
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long way home
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi#yuuji#maybe doing bg studies is the activity of choice while waiting fr leaks its so good 2 zone out n not think fr hours#can't stress about canon if you're busy studying window grates and ac units#this ws gonna start as a more train station-y piece#but as i am wont to do i got swept up during my pinterest dive#brought me further and further in2 small town train crossings and i thought they looked so cute#so i am like. puts itfs there :)#i love the idea of them just . meandering whatever quiet town they end up settling down tgt in post-canon#discovering hidden alleys n meeting all the strays holding hands th entire time....#i am manifesting PEACE and TRANQUILITY goddamn it#also i realized after the last domestic itfs series tht my use of red is at an all time low?????? leaning heavy in2 the green/yellow lately#here also . but i like the lil pops of red i included i think it centers them#happy w this!! happy w my me!! as long as i ignore the fact that indoor environments exist maybe backgrounds arent all tht bad :3
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trigunned the hades or hadesed the trigun (id in alt)
#trigun#trigun maximum#nicholas d wolfwood#vash the stampede#meryl stryfe#milly thompson#millions knives#ruporas art#type of shit ive been on lately bc ive been playing an obsessive amount of hades 2 lmfao… ofc imstead of drawing fansrt for hades#i channel that energy into trigun?😭 SEE.. the thing is. i am ALWAYS thinking about a trigun game… like an action story game#it is rotating in my brain 24/7 and now after 7billion years i finally pick up a video game#and the inspiration sparked. obviously this is just a mere mimic of an existing media... but im thinking about the plot of max now#executed differently between mediums… webbing a new retelling of the original story as game mechanics allows you - thinking of the#new roles the characters would take. like wolfwood here is not Constantly by vash’s side but he will show up once a run to clear out an#encounter. shows up seldomly at home base to make gifting difficult... an existing companion and still journeys on his own. for more#relations options merylmilly will also have occasions where they separate so vash can speak to them individually - the gungho are not bosse#most of them get the roles of giving “boons” i think.. BUT ANYWAY thats me reimagining trigun into hades. now imagining trigun into an#ORIGINAL video game.... ough... ohhh....guhh... I WANT IT SO BAD!!!!!!!!#this was just a fun exercise... im thinking about doing more but i think i shouldactually draw some hades 2 fanart first
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I'm sorry but if Sami people can be understood as other-than-white and lighter featured First Nations people can be understood as other-than-white and individuals of our sisters the Romani when similarly afflicted by melanin deficiency can be understood as other-than-white....
Your classification of Jews, who span the whole gamut of color but share the racialization and experience of being othered among any majority, including whiteness in the north/west, is only further evidence of your racism. Because in doing so you continue to perpetuate double standards for Jewish people, which is dangerous when merged with perspectives that view whiteness as a merit signifier. Not that our identity isn't a fair bit older than this pretty reductive view, but
Regardless, I'll remind that the minority indigenous groups I mentioned are in the context of a white majority, but white people do not have a monopoly on colonialism. Plenty of people don't want to be called Arab in MENA and plenty of people aren't sure that they'd classify themselves as Chinese or Russian in the sense that the West views national identity. But that kind of nuance probably isn't something I should bother with if we haven't made it past point 1.
#jumblr#jewish#colonialism#imperialism#solidarity#fun fact i am So Pale in winter and assumed to be southeast asian or latina in the summer which is an interesting thing to compare#my dad is assumed lebanese usually#my brother is a redhead sort of but tans so folks are just confused but the red hair means hes usually on the euro side of assumptions#but that goes out the window when they realize oh shit this man is jewish#depends where you are#just like..... race#its almost like it only exists as a social construct and as lived experiences#you know like the way it affects Jews
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I feel fandom would get along a lot better if there was mutual understanding that liking a character, agreeing with a character, and thinking the character is well constructed/executed are all separate (if often overlapping) positions, each with their separate tastes and subjectivities. Also: character portrayals are intended to make the audience feel things; this is separate from (if often overlapping with) analyzing/appreciating their actions and role in the story.
#I would queue this because it's truly not character-specific#but there is always something happening with a character so that probably wouldn't help lol#anyway I'm making this nonrebloggable because I am not interested in the tomato throwing atmosphere out there#do not clown in bad faith on this post or in my inbox please I will just delete it#op#it's just over time I do see a pattern of like “I think X character was wrong in this” and some reactions being “you *hate* X character!”#or that if you like a character you *must* agree with them and/or have such a deep an endless compassion for their faults and mistakes#that it comes all the way back around to removing their agency because HOW could they do any different#and if you do not give them this grace then it is antithetical to you liking them or enjoying them or even just being neutral on them#when this is often not the case#like as an Essek and Jonas Spahr enjoyer their fuck-ups are very essential to why they have any sort of “grow as a person” arc#characters *have* to have texture and foibles or they are stagnant in the story - let your fave fuck up a bit! As a treat!#and lastly I'll just say that my point here is NOT that everyone is always positive or that haterism doesn't exist.#Some commentary just seems to happen at different frequencies from each other and it catalyzes more angst than it needs to
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one thing about steve harrington is that he sucks at doing nothing. like he has to be doing something with himself lest the guy waste away. this has led to him being very good at fucking around with things especially when its something relatively quiet. the loudest steve will let himself keep his hands busy while stuck idle is tossing whatever's in his hand to himself and catching it, which usually bodes well for sports practice after coach learned that just because he was moving didnt mean he wasnt paying attention(usually the opposite).
he learned how to flip a pencil around his thumb in middle school and seeing someone in one of the meetings he sat in on doing it. he'll twirl anything he can around in his hand, especially while he was working in the mall. the scoopers were perfect for it. and any way youve seen a drummer/percussionist fiddle with a drumstick, steve knew he had to replicate it.
but even with all this movement and the fact the guy was barely ever not moving, it seemed like no one noticed it ever. a fact that nearly drove eddie insane when they were in high school together. because he did have the reputation of being restless, and in a constant state of movement. and he probably fucked around with random shit less, so how did steve "the hair" harrington not end up with the same reputation? the answer was just that he was way more quiet("and sneaky" -eddie) about it. and if the teacher hated when their students fiddled and futzed he'd be sure to try and keep the movement below his desk.
but it not that he only has to keep his hands busy. no no no, if bored or stuck waiting, and that won't suffice, steve harrington will pick up anything with words just to read it. anything. outdated newspapers, ingredients lists, magazines of any topic. he just mindlessly grabs for whatever and starts fucking reading. Robin could swear under oath to a court that her best friend has read the back of every vhs in family video. hell, she's seen him reading drugstore novels, like the fucking grandma smut and books with cover art of nicely dressed ladies running from a castle. and its her jock best friend reading it, instead of some repressed suburban woman who hates her husband. yes, this information is the bane of robin buckley's exsistance because its not like anyone would believe her.
idk just give me steve being restless but doing it quietly enough that no one really picks up on it.
#listen we've all seen the gifs of steve messing around with the scooper in s3 or him doing the same thing with a flashlight in s2#and i was like ok what if i added to that? and what if when hes waiting hes reaches blindly for something to read?#and steve reading drugstore bodice ripper novels is something i can't unsee and i needed to share it#steve harrington#stranger things#robin buckley#platonic stobin#she's so done with his shit(affectionate).#eddie munson#steddie#not exactly. but like eddie being pissed off about steve existing is kinda just shorthand for a crush atp#the party will bust into family video and steve is just reading the back of a bag of an m&ms#am i projecting? a little but we've seen this in canon so extrapolation cant hurt.#if you want real projecting ask me about my headcanon about steve and manga#headcannons
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happy october :]
@scienceteamtober day 1: before the game
with lovely beautiful awesome forever character art by @winkreallyisntable goes CRAZY!!! full art below the cut.
#hlvrai#scienceteamtober#original things#3d renders#AHHH MY APOLOGIES TO SCIENCETEAMTOBER HOST POTIONBARREL BTW! I DID NOT SEE THEIR PIECE BEFORE I STARTED THIS...#it is beautiful to see similar concepts from different perspectives but STILL i hope this does not come across as nabbing your idea :wails:#also ignore the fact that gordon exclusively owns copies of kane and lynch 2 i thought it would be funny and it saved on time.#AND because i am a computers guy i have to ignore how much sense this doesn't make with my interpretation [if i'm taking hlvrai seriously]#of how the game shit works and happens#like bro they either would not exist yet or would not yet be installed u get me right#BUT THAT SAID LIKE!!!#i love the vibe of them Waiting. heaheahea. initially this was just gonna be benrey but then i got coda on board and it was silly time.#this was awesome to make. yay :]#yay moment#IGNORE THAT I AM . LATE IN MOST TIME ZONES. HAHAHAHA.
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On one hand, Young Justice is kind of neglected by the actual superheroes that should be looking out for them in a lot of crucial ways and very much failed by the adults around them
But on the other hand Red Tornado straight up hosts a parent-teacher conference where their respective legal guardians all show up, barring Batman who’s in traffic so Nightwing fills in instead because Robin’s dad does not know he’s a vigilante which is objectively hilarious
#Superboy does not have a name and his ass is constantly getting groomed like Clark please take a more active role in his life#And all of these guys need a healthy interaction with their respective legacies that does not involve heroing#Take them out for lunch! Play a video game with them! Let them be a kid around you without getting criticized!#Red Tornado had barely reconnected with his own humanity and he’s taken a more active role in being like they are safe happy and learning#compared to the people who literally are the reason they exist in the first place#and is the only one who seems to recognize their potential and ability as a team! and he wants others to know that!#and it’s kind of heartbreaking because the JLA should be paying attention to them and noticing how they succeed and instead just show up#at the worst possible time and take things out of context and criticize them and bestie I bet you they are a lot better of a hero#than *you* were at 14-16 because they actually are going out and making a difference and saving people#but the ones who should support them the most are barely there for them at all#someone give these kids healthy and appropriate emotional support I am begging you#yj#young just us#young justice#yj98#bart allen#tim drake#kon el#conner kent#superboy#robin#dc impulse#cassie sandsmark#wonder girl#cissie king jones#arrowette#greta hayes#slobo dc#empress#anita fite
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(Forgot to post again)
A birthday present for a friend :)
#fanart#sketch#my art#artists on tumblr#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#isat fanart#isat odile#isat mirabelle#mirabelle#odile#siffrin#isat spoilers#Kinda!#I've actually never checked the room needed for that dialogue#I think?#But I know it exists!#And I wanted to leave some not so noticeable spoilers littered on the sketch without exactly spoiling anything#Mirabelle holds some random book I thought of that would have horror but also some romance in there#Whatever book she meant in that one dialogue#Siffrin is just a curious bean#Because wow the horrors#Odile is just chilling#Basically it's like set in post-Act 6 but I didn't want to spoil TOO much so the hat stayed#Maybe it's a new hat#Posing isatober thing didn't work out so have this little thing instead#I still think over what did some random guy find in that sketch#First normal Odile sketch! Took me long enough#it's 2 am
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me: im not a asoryu divorce truther, but i AM an asoryu taking a break & eventual unlabeled-long-distance-situation truther. they ABSOLUTELY needed to go on different paths at the end of the game. i totally get people who rewrite them to go back home together after 2-5, but it misses the point IMO. their split is a bittersweet thing & a testament to their devotion to each other as people and friends more than it’s a toxic split and a tragedy. it’s not ryuunosuke leaving in bitter anger at kazuma’s deceit, or kazuma being idiotically self punishing. rather, it’s them mutually saying “We need to exist outside of each other for a while for our own development as people. But i would never leave you in anger. You will always be enough for me, but you also need to learn to be enough for yourself. And ultimately we will meet again at the crossroads. When we need each other the most, and we are finally ready, and we will walk our paths side by side. Unbroken, and never having been broken. And that bond is stronger than both of our deceit, violence, shyness, and ignorance combined.”
their physical split is a show of their assurance that they could never spiritually ‘fall off’ from each other. no matter what happens, they stand together in a cosmic sense. they need to be apart so that kazuma can find a self that will live past 24, and so ryuunosuke can develop the self he found in his own journey— the self that sees its value at all. basically, ryuunosuke is leaving for himself to prove that he has a self, and kazuma is staying for himself so he can learn to care about himself enough to put his struggle in the hands of the people offering to him— so he can learn to stop running. do you get me?
you, tied to a chair and actively being waterboarded: BLBLBLBLBLLBLUBUBU—
#asoryu#asoryuu#ryuuaso#ryuunosuke naruhodou#naruhodou ryuunosuke#kazuma asogi#asougi kazuma#kazuma asougi#ryunosuke naruhodo#tgaa2#tgaa spoilers#the great ace attorney#tgaac spoilers#dgs2 spoilers#dgs2#I THINK THATS ALL OF THEM?!#ugh. but yea. the shortest version of this is i think the asoryu not-breakup is them showing that they value each other as people enough to#-want the other to start putting himself first.#kazuma has his demons the fight- the anger the self destruction the self isolation. and ryuunosuke sees that and is like i am going to be-#-be here if ever you need me. you are not alone. but you are still a human person who needs to just exist for himself for a while#i like dgs if you cant. tell. i like the kind of moral thing of like. you are not alone you are never alone-#-but still you have to live for yourself. its good#oh fuck that wasn’t short at all…#whatever. I ❤️ BITTERSWEET YAOI
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*catboys ur shounen protag*
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itadori yuuji#yuji itadori#yuuji#fanart#jjk fanart#boss shes drawing shirtless catboys.............#listen i just bought the mewji plush ive been in a Mood ok#u all can forgive me im sure#i rly liked the original mewji sketch that i did last night but fr some reason when i went to clean it i could not get th expression??#it just looked so off and kind of uncanny and not like yuuji at all#so i scapped it :) hes less scrunchy faced now#also. gomenyasai i am still guilty of doubling up on human/cat ears....#espECIALLY with a haircut like yuujis it is beyond me how to omit them#if anyone can make it work u r a better artist than i#anyway im so happy the trend of like. putting ur ref pic next to the finished piece exists#adds a lil layer of visual interest i think !!!#plus i for one think its neat seeing what other ppl use fr ref#i realized while drawing this tht its been a minute since my last boy without a shirt on#every time i get to draw torso muscles i am like i shld do this more often !!! and then i never do#bc the only thing i like more than rendering muscles is a cute fit GHJFJHFGSHg#anyway itadori mewji ladies and gays enjoy <3#i have ! places 2 b !#'why were u late' . uh .
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So many writers put so much work into their robot lore and how the robots work and where the components are and meanwhile I'm just like
High research writers with actual notes on how robots work: I both respect and fear you. And most of all love you.
#fnaf sun#Friendship is stored in the robot#That's what all the robot parts are made of. 100% friendship. And a little autism#A lot of autism perhaps#I am a little horrified every time someone says they thought the robot stuff in my fic was accurate in any way#Like I put an enormous amount of thought into it yes but#also I just made it all up. all of it.#I didn't even write it down#it exists purely in the juices of my hyperfixation addled brain#Fake it confidently and no one will notice I guess#If it's consistent within the world it's believable to readers#I live in fear of the day someone who actually knows things about mechanical stuff reads my fic
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