#like damn. not the first time I've been like “hey my boy made a friend in that series. i wonder if they've used that friend since?”

[psudopod]

I was just checking in on comics to see how my boy, Tiger King Of Kandahar is doing, (he's dead, lmao, fuckin comics,) and uh. Do correct me as I was just cherry picking comics with little regard for the story, but isn't he Muslim? Like

Yeah? Probably? I'm no expert tho.

Isn't the drinky drinks, like, not Haram? Are not Haram things ok as a cheat if you're chill? Is this a sign of his mental state in this comic? Did he just go full apostate arc off screen between his appearances? Lol. Fuckin lmao. Whatever. Let the dude have his sippies one issue before he gets hit by the Leave No Atoms Behind beam. 🥲

[bangtanshelves]

JJK Fanfic Recos

Hi. These are some of the fanfics I've read.

I've read A LOT but I'll only be including the ones I really enjoyed reading.

I'm in the process of recollecting them, please bare with me.

I'm also updating this post often, so whenever I end finishing a fic I like I just post it here. hehe

💓 - Fluff ❤‍🩹 - angst 🥵 - smut 🚨 - violence/drugs 🤪 - crack ⭐ - fav 🎣 - latest addition to the list

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚. SERIES ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

My Love is Here - @/solemnreads

Completed ✅ ⭐

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹 (so much angst, I love it), 🥵 summary: "You didn’t mean for it to happen. It’s not like you purposely woke up one day and thought “Hey I’m going to fall in love with my best friend!” No, that is not at all what happened."

Knife's Edge - @/readyplayerhobi

Completed ✅

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵, 🚨 The Jeon Clan is Family, built on blood and loyalty. It’s been an unspoken fact that one day you will marry the heir to the Clan, Jeon Jungkook. You would be a fool to deny that you love him, but what happens when you meet a blue haired man who offers you a chance at normality?

Four Seven Eight - @/jiminrings

Completed ✅ ⭐

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹 (fic made me cry) ,🥵 you’re secure when it comes to loving jungkook, knowing that your husband loves you beyond words. what you aren’t so secure about is his first love — someone who isn’t you.alternatively, jungkook’s married to you, but he still celebrates his anniversary with his ex out of sentimentality.

Close to you - @/muniimyg

Completed ✅ ⭐

genre: 💓, 🤪 It should've been easier than this, right?In which oc and Jungkook sleep together and he can't get over it.

Falling Skies - @/fortunexkookie

Completed ✅ ⭐

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jeon Jiyeon was your childhood best friend; her brother, Jungkook, was something else entirely. Once upon a time, she had called you her sun and him her moon; it was fitting, given the constant push-and-pull between you two. You used to consider him a friend, but then he had gone from endearingly frustrating dumb boy to card-carrying fuckboy so fast it had given you whiplash.

Please Love Me - @/ahunderedtimesover

Completed ✅ ⭐

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 As the only unmarried Jeon and Kim children, your families propose a union to symbolize your unbreakable bond that spans generations. But despite developing an affection for Jungkook growing up, he never returned it; he never seemed to like you, actually. You’re okay with the proposal, but surprise surprise, he isn’t.

Lowkey - @/xpeachesncream

Completed ✅ ⭐

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹, 🥵 In order to pass organic chemistry and pay off your car damages from an accident, all you have to do is help the nerd, Jeon Jungkook, with a few things: pretend to be his girlfriend and teach him the way of dating.

Hotter Than Hell - @/chateautae

Completed ✅ ⭐

Genre: ❤‍🩹, 🥵 Jungkook, Lucifer and king of hell, has been cast out of the crimson underworld for a reason he's unsure of. Embarking on his journey for the answers should've been easy, if it weren't for you, the human that nurses his wounded body in her home, and accidentally witnesses the truth of his identity. Kickstarting a hellish adventure with the devil himself, you discover Lucifer is the most infuriating company ever; and Jungkook finds out that maybe his answer to returning home lies within his annoying human confidant.

An Ode to a Broken Heart - @/smoochkooks

Ongoing... ✍

Genre: ❤‍🩹 (bro I've been crying over this fic for days), 🥵 (future smut)  you’ve watched jeon jungkook slip out of your reach your entire life. now it’s time for you to finally move on, bury the past and open a new chapter. however, you’re doing it in your own, unconventional way - by publishing anonymously a novel about your miserable relationship.

Mutual Help - @/personasintro

Ongoing... ✍ (this is also posted on AO3)

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 (damn... that's all i can say)  in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help

Way Back Home - @/solemnreads

Ongoing... ✍

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹 (please i really love angsty fics, fite me), 🥵

"Please tell me this isn't what I think it is" he asks you with tears in his eyes. You look down at the sight of your son with an oxygen mask on his face while your daughter is sleeping on the couch near the wall. You look into his eyes, broken, and sad. You've dreamt of this day for years, wondering how he would react. But here you are, hoping he could've meet the twins under different circumstances. "Yes... they're your children."

Strawberry Kisses - @/pixieknj

Ongoing... ✍

Genre: ❤‍🩹, 🥵 (Chapter 1 has been posted, but its something else) Jungkook is notoriously known as a f^ckboy who doesn’t eat p^ssy, until he finally gets alone with you…

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚. ONE-SHOTS or TWO-SHOTS ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

The Right Choice - @/honeytae

Genre: 💓 for as long as you've known Jungkook, you would think that you're witnessed all sides of him. But when you notice the way he's looking at you right now, you think you may be wrong about that.

Rainy Days - @/rklve

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Your life choices left not only yours, but Jungkook's hear broken in pieces. Now you're back in town, and just like Pluto, even if its cold and dark he tends to orbit around his sun forever.

High Demand - @/bunnyhugs77

Genre: 💓, 🥵, 🚨 A modern day Romeo and Juliet

SOJU - @/hoseoksluna

Genre: ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jungkook gives you all that he has—his feelings, his dominance and his cum.

Lost & Found - @/kooktrash

Genre: ❤‍🩹 (if you squint), 🥵 your college years have never been something you dwelled on for too long. you didn’t want to think of all the chances you lost and that’s why when the guy you had a crush on moves back to town, you try not to let it affect you again. but then he brings up old memories that didn’t go the way you thought they had and you’re thrown for a loop. you’re stuck between finding something new with him and falling back into old habits of never standing up for yourself. it probably doesn’t help that he dated your best friend, where everything seemed to go wrong.

Bottle Up Old Love - @/wintaerbaer

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jungkook may have broken up with you a year ago, but that's not going to stop him from coming to your rescue when he sees you being cornered by a creep.

Pink Sapphire - @/jiminrings ⭐

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹(please I'm a sucker for this) ,🥵 Having Jungkook as a husband is great as far as arranged marriages could go; he's easy to love. Your relationship's perhaps become so easy that Jungkook doesn't think sometimes— and that's what makes it the easiest for you to hate him.

Will it fit? - @/jeonsweetpea

Genre: 💓, 🥵, 🤪, ❤‍🩹 (just a little bit) So what if your roommate caught you masturbating? At least he forgot about it the next day. But he can't exactly forget the big dildo you left in your shared bathroom...

Break up with your Boyfriend - @/spideyjimin

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 Jungkook, the campus fuckboy, has decided to make you his next victim, but you're far from being like any of his previous hookups. You're not single. You're actually in a very long-term relationship with Baekhyun, the man you consider the love of you life, but it's for sure something that won't stop Jungkook. He wants you, and he's going to do absolutely everything to have you, even falling in love.

Paint me naked - @/gimmethatagustd

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹,🥵 After the mysteriously hot guy in your university class starts taking an interest in you, should you really trust that he's not like all the other college fuckboys? Especially when his best friend is the guy who broke your heart?

I hate you, I love you - @j/ungblue 🎣

Genre: ❤‍🩹,🥵 You hated him at seven, warmed up to him at twelve, and liked him at fifteen. Now the two of you are twenty years old and inseparable best friends... and you're absolutely in love with him; he's in love too—just not with you.

How to Get a Guy - @/taeshobipop 🎣

Genre: 💓, ❤‍🩹, 🥵 Star basketball player Jeon Jungkook has a reputation as the ultimate fuckboi. He's loved by everyone. Everyone. And you would have followed suit if he had not broken all your strict Roommate Rules™ within the first week of his stay. Jungkook, on the other hand, thinks you're absolutely bizarre. But there's a silver lining— Mr. Fuckboi here knows basketball captain Min Yoongi, your dreadfully clueless crush. He strikes up a deal with you: he'll teach you the ways of flirting if you lessen your load of rules (so Jungook can continue persuing his way through the ladies on campus). Yet the longer Jungkook spends with you, the more he realizes that maybe he doesn't want to tbe the campus fuckboi anymore. The problem is, how does he prove that to you?

[lizthewriter]

now i'm all about you / theodore nott

PAIRING  best friend!theo nott x reader

SUMMARY  theo pushes you to realize how toxic your boyfriend is and how you deserve much better. theo being much better. (tw: reader's boyfriend calls her explicit names)

QUOTE  "clung to the nearest lips, / long story short it was the wrong guy, / now i'm all about you," - long story short by taylor swift

WORD COUNT  1.8K

WRITTEN  7.13.2024

theo glared at the wall with an unbridled fury as he rubbed your back, your sobs filling the room. he was going to kill him.

who was him, exactly? oh just your good-for-nothing boyfriend. now theodore loved with his whole heart. he truly did. but he couldn't for the life of him understand why you were going out with an absolute wanker like him.

you were so paticular about who you allowed in your life - but this arse somehow slipped his way through the cracks. this boy somehow always found a way to make you crawl into theo's arms with tears in your eyes, a broken heart, and wounded pride. and damn it, he's been holding himself back from knocking sense into ypu because he was afraid that kind of talk was coming from the fact that he'd been bloody in love with you since the day he first laid eyes on you. but he knew it was beyond that now. all he wanted was for you to be happy - and you very obviously weren't.

"hey, do you think you can look at me for a second?" theo asked in a gentle tone, shifting away from you slightly to get you to pop up out of your shell. you raised your head away from his chest (where his sweater was now damp with your tears) - he practically felt his heart break at your apperance. cheeks shiny with tears, eyes red and puffy from crying, hair frizzy and messy.

"i am telling you this as your best friend and someone who cares about you," theo started slowly, taking your hand and placing it in his. "you're an amazing person. and you don't deserve to be treated like this. you deserve to be treated like - like a queen! all right? this shitty guy shouldn't get a single sickle of your time."

"but - but what if this is the best i can get?" you asked with a sniffle, the waterfall of tears returning as your chest heaved. another pang of his heart, another surge of his rage. "what if i break up with him and then i'm alone forever cause no one else wants me?"

"i promise you, that's not true," theodore told you reassuringly. "i'm not complimenting you to be nice, i'm being honest, you're genuinely one of the best people I've ever met and i'm grateful i have you in my life . . . anyone else who's fortunate enough to be friends with you will see and recognize that as well. please. for your sake. break up with him. he only ever makes you upset. and you deserve to be happy."

the responsive silence weighed more heavily on theo than it probably did on you.

"maybe you're right," you sniffled in response. you wiped away your tears with the edge of your sleeve before theo offered you a tissue. "i deserve to be happy."

he smiled softly. "that's right."

"yeah . . . why do i get to be treated like this when i'm nothing but a great girlfriend?" you exclaimed angrily. "i mean, does he go sobbing to his friends about this stuff or is he just going about his life like- like he's not ruining mine?"

you stood up suddenly. "thank you, theo. you made me realize something today. i'll be right back."

"wait, i didn't mean break up with him no-" he wasn't even able to finish his sentence before you slammed the door to his dorm behind you as you rushed out of the room. he sighed, then chuckled. "well, that was anticlimactic," he said sarcastically to himself.

-

you laughed gaudily, your nose buried in a bouquet of flowers. your arm wrapped around him. your eyes admiring him. your body leaning against him.

what a prick, theo thought.

your "boyfriend" was manipulating you and you couldn't even see it. or at least, you didn't want to see it. see, you had confronted him. made a whole scene in front of his friends. landed a stark slap across his face. but he just as easily won you back in your moment of post-relationship weakness. by bringing you flowers and chocolate a promising to be better.

and here you were in hogsmeade, where you had invited him on a double date. you hooked him up with one of your friends, who was obviously very into theo and very dissappointed to see theo not granting her even a moment of his attention. she sat grumpily beside him, sipping on her butterbeer while grumbling under her breath.

"i'm going to grab us some more drinks," you said with a wide grin, getting up out of your chair. turning around, you bumped into another student trying to carry an obscene amount of butterbeer which accidentally slipped down your entire front. soaking your shirt, causing the thin fabric to cling to your chest.

"watch where you're going!" your boyfriend shouted at the kid, who mumbled apologies under his breath as he began to clean the mess he had made. he grabbed a handful of napkins from the center of the table, beginning to wipe at your chest, but you gently pushed his hands away as you wrapped your eyes around your body to protect from the wandering eyes of neighboring tables. "and you, couldn't you wear something a little less . . . showy?" he asked you under his breath, all though theo could hear him well enough. "i don't need other guys looking down your shirt."

"there's- there's nothing wrong with my shirt," you mumbled, receding further within yourself.

"you look like a cheap whore walking around like that."

you shut your eyes tight, almost as if you were afraid of standing up for yourself. "you said i looked pretty earlier."

"don't you dare call her that. and stop trying to police what she's wearing," theo said suddenly, getting up from the table and wrapping a protective arm around you. your boyfriend narrowed his eyes at theo. "when you should be helping her instead."

he took what was supposed to be an intimidating step towards theo. "take your hands off of my girlfriend."

theo chuckled bitterly. "your girlfriend? you certainly don't treat her like one."

"i'm warning you."

"just stop," you said quietly, placing a hand on your boyfriend's chest. "i was right. this . . . this wasn't a good idea. thank you for the flowers and the drinks but we're done."

you didn't even look him in the eyes as your hand slipped away from him and theo turned around, leading you out of the three broomstick.

"you're a little bitch you know that?" he called after you, causing the whole bar to go deathly silent. "probably cheating on me with theodore 'i miss my mommy' nott. date a pathetic loser like that and see-"

the crowd let out a collective gasp as he was suddenly shut up by theodore's fist meeting his mouth. red rinsed theo's knuckles - he couldn't tell if the blood was his own or your boyfriend (well, ex-boyfriend he now supposed) but to be honest, he didn't care. "you keep your filthy mouth shut," theodore spat.

"that's it! you two, out of my pub!" madam rosmerta exclaimed, shooing you and theodore away with a rag. as you left, you glanced behind you to see her giving your ex a good verbal beating. "oh and the headmaster will be hearing about this! students fighting, in my pub! not in so many years have i seen such disrespect to a public establishment!"

"here," theo said, placing his rather large coat around your shoulders as the two of you exited the three broomsticks. "are you okay? he said some pretty shitty things to you back there."

"i'll be fine," you responded with a weak smile. "i'm really sorry, you shouldn't have had to-"

"i wanted to. punch him in the face, i mean. he deserved it." the two of you soaked in the silence wrought on by your awkwardness. "he's wrong. you're not a - you know, what he called you. and i don't think anyone in that pub would assume that of you either."

"that means a lot to me, theo . . ." you paused, reflecting on your past relationship. "you want to know something?"

"hm?"

"i knew he was bad for me. of course, deep down, i knew. i guess i just hoped that he would be the person i thought he could be, the best version of himself. but . . . he didn't turn out that way." you buried your face in your hands and sighed. "merlin i feel so stupid."

"you're not stupid," theo reassured you, stopping in the middle of the road to place both his hands on your shoulder. "you're optimistic and you always believe the best in those around you. and that's one of the things that i- i love about you. it's not your fault that not everyone deserves your kindness."

the corner of your lips curled upwards and for a moment, you felt your heart pang in your chest. the way theo was looking at you, well, you didn't want to delude yourself, but there was so much love in his gaze. so much kindness and compassion. and looking back on your friendship, you can't remember him having done all the things he's done for you for anyone else. and you can't think of a single moment, at a drop of a quill, that he wasn't there for you when you needed him.

"you're too kind to me, theo," you mumbled in embarrassment, your cheeks growing red at his praise.

"i'm not kind, only honest, you know this."

"i- i can't help but think there's a reason you're so nice to me," you suggested subtly. it seemed so obvious to you now - it made so much sense. "theo, you have been there for me whenever i needed you. and you've helped me through so much. it's hard to think you'd do all that for someone you just consider . . . a friend."

theo paused and his silence made you nervous. maybe you were looking too much into it, reading too much into it?

"if my care for you were coming from a different place . . . hypothetically, how would you respond?" he asked, nervously shifting the weight of his body from one foot to the other.

"hypothetically, i'd say i would need some time to properly move on but i wouldn't mind going on a hypothetical date," you responded, pretending to consider the prospect. "that is, of course, if you can fit one into your hypothetical schedule."

theo smiled, a grin so wide you were sure his face would split in half. "i think i'd hypothetically be able to work something out."

[lycanlure]

Factory Reset

Winter (dom) x Male Reader (sub)

Synopsis : reader here is a gay dude turned straight by dommy bestfriend Minjeong in a drinking session, as she reveals some intimate confessions to you, how reader's body makes her act weird and stuff. How she feels so horny when she sees you using crop-tops and short shorts.

You were always this feminine, and always been exposed to feminine things like, making your hair longer, manicuring, dolls, playing house, and make up and other stuff that makes girls, girls. And you've always been friends with girls, especially your introverted childhood best friend Minjeong.Your Mother typically influenced you but Minjeong technically molded you with the very image you desired.

What's fascinating is that, though Minjeong was surrounded by boys most of her childhood she still held a very strong feminine aura around her. That made you adore her more, platonically.

But for Minjeong, it's different...

She always saw you as more than a friend... She liked you, even though you were different, well... More like, love you. Romantically, and now she might as well confess to you. But that doesn't end there, she has been planning to get you drunk as fuck, and then confess... But why make you drunk first? Her motives are far insidious and disgusting. She had always dreamed of stripping you off of your clothes, revealing your pale and soft skin for her to devour. This started ever since both of you stepped foot in puberty, whilst she helped you be the person you are today. She dreamed of a body that encapsulated her dream lover.

The day that Minjeong will finally confess to you and make you hers has come.

Y/N's POV

"Gosh, is my blush alright?" I sighed as my blush was a bit too light. I turned my attention to Minjeong, who is also prepping herself for today's pictorial. Well it is my birthday and it's gonna be lit! "Hey, is my blush alright?" I asked Minjeong, "Yeah, it's a bit too pale, let me fix it." She answered quickly. As she approached me, her touch was delicate. 'This feeling is a bit weird, sure. This is normal between but her touch for the past few weeks has been a bit too touchy. Like intimate touchy, maybe she's just being caring. Thats all',I thought to myself.

Finally at campus grounds, there was a day long event happening. We tried staying but we got bored. "Ugh, this so fucking boring..." I groaned as I checked through my phone, I could see Minjeong glancing at me by my side. As she was about to speak I cut her off, "Lets go some- oh wait what was that Minjeongie?" I quickly realized she was trying to tell me something. "As I was saying, lets go back to my dorm" She smiled as she checked her phone for the time she quickly added, "Lets go have a drink" she smiles. I thought it was a good idea, but oh boy... This feels like trouble, so I brushed it off. As we bought some booze, and fled to her dorm. I was met with a very strawberry-like scent that enveloped my nose, hugging them softly. I sat at one of her beanie bags and slouched relaxedly. "So, why did you think about getting booze? Trying something new?" You smirked at her, "Um... Y-Yeah and I wanted to tell you something" she responded her head down, mostly being shy. "Ohh~" I sang as she preped our booze. We took sip after sip after sip, I got tipsy but Minjeong? Damn she's tough. "W-Woah, you're not even tipsy yettt~" I groaned as my tipsy-ass getting beaten by someone who just had her first drink ever.

Winter POV

'This is my chance! O-Ok I'm gonna go for it!' I thought to myself, seeing

Y/N so tipsy and weak. I have to seize the opportunity, "So Y/N... I actually like you, like a lot..." I told Y/N as he was fixing his crop-top. "And... Please, can we at least try?" I quickly added. "W-Woah... I've never thought of you actually like me and, I don't know..." He grabbed the hem of his collar. And looked at me, "You know that I'm gay ri-" I cut him off, as I kissed his lips. Pressing them hard, his expression shocked.

As he tried pushing me away, I grabbed both of his hands. Pinning him to the ground, "M-Minjeong, s-stop!" He shouted, as I attacked his lips again. His legs were squirming, also trying to push me away. I stopped kissing him, seeing him so flustered and out of breath only made me eager to make him mine. "Minjeong, w-what has gotten into you?!" Y/N exclaimed, as I ripped his crop-top revealing his lushes pink small nipples.

He tried covering them but I grabbed his hands and pinned them down. Licking his hardened nipples, made him moan. "Nngghh... M-Minjeo- s-stop..." His moans were music to my ears. As it only turned me on, I removed one we of my hands in his hand. I pulled down his short-shorts, revealing a very pink strawberry colored tip.

That was hardened, the size though was no joke... It was the perfect size for me, about 6 inches in length and 2 inches in width. He tried covering them with his unpinned hands but his strength was no match from mine. Focusing back on his nipples again made him shiver, that was enough for him to not resist me anymore. "S-Slow down, Minjeong... Please" his breathing is shaky, I grabbed his waist.

Removing my hands from pinning his other hand, I licked them. They're so tasty... Salty, sweet and so perky. I bit one of them, I heard a hiss from him. That quickly turned me on. His hardened cock still exposed, so I slowly kissed my way down. Kissing his nipples, down to his chest, and then his stomach, down to his waist and then his hardened cock.

"O-Oh, f-fuck... Minjeong, slow do-" As I put my mouth down on his cock, it was so hard yet the texture was soft. It tasted salty, yet it left an addictive taste. When I continued to taste him, his moans were starting to get louder.

Authors POV

"M-Minjeongiee~, g-guh... Hah" His voice clearly in ecstasy, he held Minjeongs head to keep on attacking his member. Minjeong feasted on him, as the flavor of him only made Minjeong more and more addicted to him. "Ahh, C-Cummi- M-Minjeong! p-please s-stop!" Without warning Minjeong fastened her pace, making him reach his orgasm. His orgasm made him shake compulsively, as Minjeong's tongue swirled around him. Hr continued to orgasm, Minjeong drank everything. She stood up, removing her lower garments. Revealing a dripping entrance... She proceeded to grab you by the hair, moving it up and down. Giving you the taste of a woman that longed for you, for so many years. "Y-Y/N t-this feels so g-good" Her voice shaken, the fact that your face is being use for her pleasure. Your voice is dampened by her entrance, juices that leaked out from her you desperately choke on, you however tried to get a hold of her, trying to push her away. But her resilience and determination alone, made your defenses weak. As her climax was near, she pushed you deeper into her, making you savour everything that leaked out from her. She exploded, squirts of her juice came flying through your throat and nose, making you gag. Of course you can't drink it all, some you spat out and most of it you drank.

Her leg shaken, as her hand dropped your hair. Your weakened state left you open for her next assault, "M-Minjeong..." You heave your breath, "S-Sorry... Y/N its ju-" Winter got caught off as Y/N's hand was on her hands... Winter was shocked how the one that she just assaulted held her hand so softly... "I-Its alright, you're drunk ri-" Y/N's lips were yet attacked again. Winter sensing Y/N is enjoying this, she left no time for him to finish his sentences. "Y-Yeah..." As her hand floated on his crotch again, she moved her hand hastily. Catching Y/N off guard, she inivetibly harden the kiss. Making Y/N weak again, she then moved herself. Aligning her entrance down to her sexually confused friend. "I'll make you mine..." Winter sounded desperate, "G-Go ahead" Y/N's voice shaky and high...

As Winter lowered herself, pleasure struck the two. Stunning them for a second, they both look at each other. Winter looked like she had just hit the jackpot, Y/N looking more like a renewed person. Both of them had different thoughts yet both shared the same goal right now, to feel each other's love. As Winter ravaged Y/N's cock, Y/N felt Winters tightness embracing him. His perfectly shaped cock drove inside Winter, making them both moan. Winter hugged Y/N, as Y/N did the same. Both felt tremendous pleasure, Winter pushed Y/N down. "I'm going to ride you and turn you into my bitch" Winter said coldly, as Y/N just smiled and kisses her hands. "Sure, make me your bitch" Both smiled as they shared a kiss with each other... Winter now riding Y/N, this sensation made Winter more and more addicted to this kind of act. Y/N moaning like a bitch in heat, Winter fasten her pace as both are nearing... "Fuck... Feels... So... Amazing" Winter moving up and down vigorously as Y/N lay down. Drooling as his limit has already reached. Both of them are in a euphoric state, Winter and Y/N jolted as both came to their climax. Winter collapsed in Y/N's soft and pale chest, Y/N cathing and hugging Winter in the process, "W-Wow... I never thought I could do it with a woman..." Y/N gasping for air, "M-Me too, I thought I can never do this with you..." Winter having the same state with Y/N. Both looked at each other for one-last time, "I love you" both kissed and embraced each other. As the sun rises, both felt something new inside of them.

Y/N thinking he'd be this person to have a man loving him, instead the woman that was with him throughout his journey, was the only person that truly wanted and understood him, loved him more than anyone.

While Winter thought the love of her life will be taken away by some random person yet Winter took his heart...

Many Years had passed and both had children, 3 in fact. Both of them are still surprised to this day that both of them are able to be together, forever.

The End

[bluetimeombre]

Losing my religion

[to everyone who has ever said to me, watch the last of us, I hope you’re happy, I’ll never know peace again. This isn’t proof read.]

tw: death, blood, guns, curse words, allusions to suicide

The last of us II spoilers

(GIF not mine)

Abbey knew that for the murderer of her father to feel just an ounce of what she felt, it wouldn't be enough to hurt him, not even to kill him.

No, she'd have to take away something he cared about. Something more. He needed to live with the pain he'd created.

She lingered at her father's grave, where the other Fireflies that were murdered that day were buried. Her friends- the others who thirsted for vengeance- lingered. They didn't want it like her. Didn't need it like her.

Abbey glanced over her shoulder at them. "I want him to hurt like me. I want him... I want him alive."

But the reports had said there were two that day in the hospital. Two murderers. She wanted you.

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"You know I should come with you," said Joel as you sorted your horse, checking everything was strapped. "Don't like you being alone out there."

"Hey!" protested Dina who was already a-top her horse, offended.

Joel waved her off. Sure there was Dina but she'd become as much one of yours as Ellie was. You loved Dina, adored her. And god Joel could see how much she was like you. Witty, strong, never afraid. It terrified him, especially when you patrolled not at his side.

You smiled at him, pulling on your gloves. "You and Ellie should patrol, c'mon it's the first time she's been talkin' to us without storming away at the end."

Your's, Joel's and Ellie's situation was something completely unique that the town of Jackson had been privy to since you'd arrived. She'd moved out the house into the garage and you'd lost count of how often you'd caught Joel staring at the place from the window. Or the nights you'd linger on the porch, nursing a cup of coffee just to check on her.

Finally, progress was being made. You were pushing them into it.

"We could all go," suggested Joel, hands on his hips.

"Family patrol?" you chuckled, eyeing him through the rising sun.

He wasn't amused.

Sighing, you patted her yours and handed the reins to Dina to hold. You could tell Joel was trying to keep his scowl in place as he looked down at you, the lines of his eyes and forehead creasing, the greys in his hair blending with the snow. You wouldn't have it any other way.

Slowly your arms sneak around his waist, his hands still on his hips as he remained stern.

"Baby," he whispered.

"This is just patrol, i've done in hundreds of times before," you remind him.

"Once without me at you side, darlin'," he reminded you.

"And everything was fine," you arms wrap further around him as Joel tutted, finally resting his arm around your shoulder. Your smile faltered a bit. "Just try with Ellie, ok? I know what we did was justified to us but to her.... she's always wanted more than she is. Just try to meet her where she is."

Joel watched you, chest rising and falling with his steady breaths. His gaze softened as he took in your words.

"For me? For us." You fluttered your lashes at him and gave him a smile.

He'd have given you the damn world for the taking if you'd just asked him. "Damn woman," he muttered, kissing at top your head. It was a yes. You knew it. "Should've kept you in bed."

"You should've persuaded me."

Joel rose a brow. "I can persuade you now?" his hand sneaked down to your bum, tapping it in promise.

"Gross!" Dina yelled.

"Down, old boy," you chastise, slipping through his arms.

Joel was old. Older than you by some decades, but he was enough of a man to pull you back in and kiss you fiercely. He knew you'd come back to him, you always did. Even when he was a stubborn man and didn't want to feel how he felt, you pushed and pushed until you were standing where you are today.

When you part there's no teasing from Dina. You lick your lips to keep the taste of him as you travel. "Go get our girl," you tell him.

Joel runs his hands over your shoulders. He could hardly feel you through all the layers. Which was good. You were warm, you were safe. "You're my girl. My girls."

He walked you to your horse and you swung on. He took the reins from Dina and placed them in your gloved hands. "Be safe, babygirl."

You nodded, kicking your horse to go as he passed a nod to Dina.

Joel walked behind the two of you, watching you head out the gates and into the snow covered lands. His heart was steady, his hand didn't tremble. Because soon you'd be back in his arms and he'd take you to bed and hols you that extra ten minutes he wanted in bed that morning.

As the gates closed he walked with them, keeping an eye on you.

Your retreating figure was becoming a blur without his glasses, yet he could just make out your hands coming up to your chest and cupping the sign of a heart. For him.

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You practically carried Dina through the doors of the lodge that Abbey had told you was safe. "Easy, easy, you're ok, I got you," you mumbled as you held her, arms working against hers to warm her. You'd thrown off your scarf, your parker and put it on her.

You were doing everything to keep her safe. To keep her warm that caution was out the window. Almost.

You had Joel's voice in the back of your head, telling you how dangerous this was, relying on strangers. Strangers with guns no less.

But you'd saved the girl from a horde, had taken her in. She owed you. In a fucked up world, you liked to think debts still stood some ground.

You should've thought to turn back when the snow got worse, or when radio signal got patchy. When you saw flumes of black smoke coming from the town you should've pushed your horse through but Dina was blue with cold and the girl had promised you had blankets and guns.

Looking back it was too easy, you should've caught it.

You put Dina at the fire as Abbey's friends saw to her. You looked out the windows, saw only snow with the dull glow of a fire. Your town, your home.

Joel wouldn't have taken a chance with the storm. He would've returned with Ellie. You almost hoped he was huddled somewhere like you and Dina.

"Jackson, come in!" you called into the radio, begging for reach even though you'd had none before. "Tommy you there? Anybody over radio!"

"Her name is Dina," said Abbey to her friend, "and she is Y/N."

The shift happened while your back was to the room. Foolish.

"Y-Y/N," Dina's weak voice came through to your senses.

A gun to her head. An arm around her throat.

You hand flew to your gun that you'd stupidly put at your belt but another held a gun to you. So you showed your weakness, hands up.

"We're not gonna hurt her," said Abbey.

"Then put the gun down," you said while another of Abbey's disarmed Dina and yourself. You hardly felt her hands on you, taking the guns as your eyes stayed on Dina as she was put to sleep. "Whatever you want, take it, just leave her alone."

Abbey scoffed as you peeled away her jacket. "Who do you think we are?"

You judged them: A small group, well stocked, well adjusted. "Fireflies?" you'd had nightmares about things like this, the people you'd killed haunting you.

Joel had always saved you from them.

You hoped he didn't come to this one.

"Haven't you heard, there are no more fireflies. They're all gone."

You rose a brow as your gaze flicked to Dina. She was breathing. She was asleep. It'd be a challenge to get her out of here- because you would get out of here- but at least she wouldn't bare witness to what would go down. It would go down. Five armed vs you. It seemed impossible but you had to get Dina out. So anything was possible.

"I'm gonna give you one chance to tell the truth," said Abbey. She was un-armed, arms over her chest. "If you do, i'll let her live."

You note shock from a couple of her friends, not as well-oiled a machine as it seemed.

"Wait Abbey-"

"Shut up!"

"What do you wanna know?" you asked, surprisingly calm in the face of your own danger.

Abbey levelled her gaze on you "Where was the last place you saw the Fireflies?"

That's what it was all about. Those damn bugs. They'd ruin everything. You could almost guess what was happening, the plan of vengeance laid put before you. You knew how powerful it was and for a second a flicker of doubt crossed your mind.

You looked back to Dina. "Salt lake."

Abbey hummed, nodding and walking the room. "And are you Joel Miller's woman?"

Perhaps you shouldn't have goaded the ones with the guns, but Ellie had to get her attitude from somewhere.

"Why, jealous?"

Abbey picked up her shotgun and shot a bullet through your hip before you could flinch.

You went down cursing, sweat rolling down your brow as you gasped at the burst of pain. Again, not your first bullet but the pain always remained a new.

You rolled onto your back, pushing yourself up.

Dina hadn't stirred.

But Abbey walked to you. You didn't flinch as she got to a crouch in front of you. "You're tough. Guess you probably have to be killing all those people. Do you know how many you and your man killed that day?"

You knew. You remembered each bullet.

"Joel got fifteen soldiers, right?" said Abbey. "And you got two... and one doctor."

You were panting, feeling the blood ooze through your shirt. On the one day you'd chosen to wear white.

"You remember that one?" asked Abbey. "An un-armed doctor you shot in the head."

Yeah you knew that one. It was the last one before Marlene.

"Yeah, that was my dad. You probably already figured. The nurses say you barely even looked at him when you pulled the trigger and that you walked right past his body and out the door."

You knew at that moment, you weren't leaving. You cast one last look at the smoking Jackson and quickly made peace with the fact it would be over, soon hopefully. When you looked back at Abbey, tears of frustration pooled in her eyes. "Yeah."

She nodded. "I looked at him. I saw him. I was nineteen."

Ellie was nineteen. You'd only had a few months to see that. Your ears rung with the fact you wouldn't see twenty, or twenty-one. Wouldn't see how Dina and Ellie grew up together, or Tommy's boy who you'd held since he was a baby.

You wouldn't see Tommy.

You would never see Joel again. The only peace that came with that fact was that he wouldn't fine you up here, no radio, no tracks in the snow. You'd be lost to him forever. But Dina, Dina would be lost to. She'd wake and do the only sensible thing: leave you and save herself. Maybe she'd break the news gently or maybe she'd cry, you'd like to think you meant something to her.

You wished she'd lie and tell them you were lost in the storm, or that you'd gotten bitten by an infected and shot yourself to stop the change. You just hoped Joel would forgive himself.

Oh, Joel.

".....there are some things that just everyone agrees are fucking wrong."

You didn't know what Abbey had said before that but you nodded. It was wrong what you did, how easy and brutal killing that day was. Yet you didn't believe in much goodness nower days.

Then Abbey spotted the golf clubs.

Then her mind was set as she went to pick one out.

"You know it's funny, I have waited so-"

"I'm in pain enough as it is Abbey, can we begin already?!" you called. You were lucky enough to miss one of her speeches, you didn't want to suffer another.

Abbey picked one and wielded it like a sword as she loomed over you, your breaths coming harder as your brain screamed for you to do something. "You... you don't get to rush this."

The first blows came in blood-curdling screaming.

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Joel didn't know what to expect when him and Ellie came across a lodge. He honestly didn't know. He was a man torn by the smoke of Jackson, by the fire that had begun with the infected and the news that he'd caught in crackles over the fraying radio signal.

'No... Di... N... Y/N.'

They'd scoured the snow covered lands as the storm let up, further showing Jackson's destruction. But when he caught sight of yours and Dina's horse left out he had to go further.

He and Ellie walked in. There was quiet. There was nothing. Small puddles on the floor, maybe you'd passed through and were resting.

Then, Joel and Ellie caught the noise of thuds from above. Of grunting. Nothing else but thudding and yells of anguish. Not pain. Of anguish.

He motioned for Ellie to stay behind as he led the way, gun raised, following the noises.

The room was ahead and maybe he should've thought more about what he could've found. But it wouldn't be you hurt. You never laid down and let yourself take it, so that was the last thing he expected to see.

He hadn't even took note of the room as he nudged the door open. Hadn't looked at the others in the room. He hadn't even thought that him and Ellie could've taken them if they'd gone in already shooting. Because he hadn't thought to see you bloody on the floor.

A girl was knelt next to you, raining fist after fist upon a face that he was already marred with your blood.

"Joel!" Ellie yelled as she made shot out, hoping for something, anything.

A body barrelled into her at the same time as one did to Joel.

A shot rang through the room as bullet lodged itself into his knee and sent him down with a thud.

"Motherfuckers!" Ellie yelled before she was wacked in the head, crumbling to the floor and out cold.

Joel was punched in the face and his sight blurred. When it came back, you were still there, drenched in your own blood. Two of the bodies held him down, held him down so that his face was pushed onto the hard wood floor and forced to stare at you.

Abbey actually smiled.

"Y/N!" he called out.

Your finger twitched. The eyelid that wasn't black and swollen fluttered. You were still there, swinging by a pulling thread.

Joel's voice caught in his throat. "That's it baby, look at me, just look at me, focus on me!"

Your eye closed again.

"Don't you dare! Y/N, look at me!" he yelled, spit flying. He pushed his body, focused the white agony of his knee into fury but there were two bodies on top of him and another kicked him in the chin.

"No!" yelled Abbey, the first time she'd spoken since she'd started her assault. "I want him to watch."

Joel spat blood on the ground. Now, it was marked with the both of you. He turned his head back to you. Not to accommodate Abbey but to see you and only you.

"Listen to me, baby, you're gonna be fine," his voice cracked. He wasn't an optimist like you but by god was he planning all the ways you would die of old age at his side in his bed. He damn right prayed that this wasn't happening again, as he was helpless. "Please, don't do this!"

Abbey punched you in the face once more. You body jerked.

"Stop please!" he cried. "Y/N, come on baby girl, get up! Just get up, honey!"

Nothing.

"Fucking get up!"

Abbey took joy in the fact you weren't.

"C'mon, baby, open those damn eyes and focus on me! Get up! Fuck!" he was using ever trick he could think of, thrashing around against the bodies holding him down.

Abbey huffed, assessing how much more she wanted this.

"No, no, no," he could see the life draining from you as you lost hope. "Baby... ba-baby, don't do this to me. You can't. Please," Joel cried. "Get up!" he then roared.

You tried. He saw it. He wasn't mad with grief. He saw it. He saw your fingers twitch and your eyelid flutter open, your eye, red from a popped blood vessel, looked at him.

You tried. Let it be known that for him, you tried.

Joel's lips tilted into something like a smile of relief. "That's good, baby, you're doing so well. Just get up, c'mon just get up, get up."

Your face was covered by heavy boots and a hand reaching for the broken golf club.

That bitch had broken it with how hard she'd beaten you.

"No," he sobbed. Joel started screaming, started losing his mind. "No, no, no, please. Kill me- just- just kill me! Please, not my baby! Not my baby. Me!"

And he yelled and screamed and sobbed and cried as the sharp end of the golf club was thrust once into your neck.

His throat ripped and his knee was suddenly nothing. The bodies of you and his daughter blended into one as he thrusted around, banging his head onto the floor. Whether it was to kill himself or just to erase the way your body twitched once more as they blade met its target.

He just wanted it all done with.

When he looked back up he looked at Abbey and not you. In fact, he took note of every person in that room, every feature of their face, satisfied by what they'd done or shocked at the ruthlessness.

Joel didn't have to say anything because his promise weighed heavy on them all.

Abbey had just started the cruellest cycle of revenge.

He made those promises to himself even as boots were kicked into his gut, stealing his breath and breaking his ribs. Even when they all ran off and he was free to move he was counting their steps and thinking of all the places they would never be able to hide because he would find them.

Pain was a dear friend of his and he'd call in a few debts to be owed.

When Joel was free he crawled back home. Back to you. The thing that kept him stable, that gave him love after Sarah's death.

"Baby?" his finger tips brushed yours.

You didn't move. Your gaze looked past him.

Joel wrapped his fingers around the club and- with a trembling breath- pulled it out. He yelled out in pain with the movement, killing him.

"Baby?"

There was nothing. Just nothing.

"C'mon baby," he ignored every pain of his just to hold you in his arms again, cradling you close. "I know, baby, I know, I know, I know. I know it hurts- you're ok, you're ok."

Joel spoke as if you were still hanging on, as if you weren't already gone. Maybe he was just going through the motions of it all, of losing the happiness of his life all over again. Or maybe he was trying to convince himself it would all be ok.

"C'mon let me get you up, baby, I've got to get you up," he moved so you were in his lap, your body pressing into his bashed knee. He'd never walk again but that was fine. He didn't want to walk away from you. "I know baby, I know, shh, I've got you, I've got you."

His head buried into your matted and bloody hair. In spite of all the blood you still smelt like him. You didn't smell like yourself, you liked to smell like him. He wished you had a scent that wasn't tainted.

Joel's sobs rocked both your bodies as he pulled you into him, trying to bury your body inside of him. "Get up. Baby, get up. Oh baby, please get up."

And the ground was too cold to dig. They wouldn't bury you till summer.

[reader-wandering18]

Yuu Hunter x Hunter

It's Yuu Zoldyck's turn!

— Four eyes!

— Oh Yuu, welcome.

Trey greeted the little white-haired boy who smilingly entered the kitchen of his bedroom. He noticed how his eyes sparkled when he saw the sweets on the table.

— You can't.

Trey carefully caught the boy's hand who was about to take a cookie

— Hee, why not? — Yuu said, annoyed by the older boy's intervention

— You, I've only seen that you've been eating sweets. Even in the cafeteria. Ace and Deuce told me that you frequently go to Mr. S's store for sweets for lunch.

— Tch, damn snitches.

He really just joked!

— I'm growing, I need a LOT of SWEETS to be energized and keep my body healthy. — he said with an angelic smile in order to take a sweet

— What kind of logic is that? — Trey brought his hand to his face, unaffected by the boy.

He was really worried, like the older brother he is, to see a child like Yuu eat only sweets and find out that at 6 years old he consumed kilos of something he called chocorobots, his health and vocal care was at stake!

— Listen, Yuu… Huh? Yuu?

When Trey took his hand off his face and looked for the boy, he was surprised to see that he was gone. But he wasn't the only one missing. THE COOKIES HE HAD MADE AT DEUCE AND ACE'S ORDER HAD ALSO DISAPPEARED!

— YUU!!

YUU came out of Heartslabyul's dormitory with a big smile.

— Mmm. Trey really knows how to make sweets!

— I'm really tired

Deuce said entering with Jack along with some of the clubs like Magical Shift, Horse Riding and Basketball to the school locker room.

— Oh, it's full

— Yuu! — Deuce shouted happily

He was about to ask what he was doing there, when he noticed how his clothes, as well as his face were covered in dirt.

— What happened to you? — Riddle asked with some concern upon seeing him.

— Hahaha, did they roll you around, little herbivore? — Leona seemed to have fun seeing him.

— Don't laugh! — her cheeks are slightly red from embarrassment — It was that stupid cat's fault!

— Little shrimp looks really adorable that way~

— Shut up!

— Stupid cat? — Silver asked somewhat sleepily

— Speaks of Grim — Ace clarified

— What did he do this time? — Epel asked

— Hmp. I don't want to talk about that.

Yuu walked over to one of the lockers where he had spare clothes, as well as a towel and shampoo.

— The shower the Ramshackle hasn't been repaired yet? — Jack asked.

— That stupid crow said he would. But it's been a week and he hasn't moved his damn ass!

Yuu slammed his locker so hard that it dented.

— Hey Yuu! Don't slam it…

— Huh? Why did everyone go quiet?

The shampoo Sebeck was holding slipped and hit the ground with a thud.

Yuu had taken off his loose shirt. All eyes were on the toned body of who was supposed to be a 13-year-old boy!

— HEY YUU/HUMAN!!

Suddenly the first years approached the boy. Sebeck grabbed him by the shoulders while shaking him fiercely.

— HOW DO YOU HAVE A MUSCULAR BODY?! — I didn't know my friend was that strong! — How did you manage this? — What kind of training do you do?!

Floyd seemed excited to have discovered something about the little shrimp. He wanted to see how much he could squeeze and if he was able to beat him.

Riddle, Leona, Ruggie, Silver and Jamil were in complete shock.

How was it possible, that a child looked stronger than them.

— HORN!

— Kukuku is that human boy

Malleus looked down to see Yuu greeting him.

Currently Malleus and Lilia were up in one of the school buildings. Both were talking while enjoying the sunset. They were too high, enough to be seen only by someone as expert as Rook. But surprisingly that boy had managed to see them.

Malleus was about to disappear and appear down below to go see the little human boy but in a blink he found himself face to face with a pair of blue eyes

— Yo!

Yuu had appeared next to him in a second

— Really surprising — Lilia said seeing the distance in the place where Yuu was previously.

It was only seconds.

From the first meeting Malleus realized that the boy did not seem to be a normal human like any other. Lilia had also never seen a child so fast and strong in all her years of life.

— It's a good view — Yuu said as he looked at the entire school campus and a little more of the town below.

— Although the view from my house is much higher

— How high is your house? — Lilia asked

— 3,772 meters on an inactive volcano

Lilia was surprised and Malleus almost tripped. The castle where his grandmother's/Maleficent's castle was located was a mountain, it had a certain height far above the human towns to prevent them from climbing but he simply had a house on a volcano.

Seeing the reaction of both, Yuu could not help but see that slip on the part of an apparently dark, cold and refined prince like Malleus.

— Kuku, what a brave child — Lilia said as she saw how Yuu laughed without any filter

— You're lucky human child, if you weren't my friend, that offense would be punished with lightning.

— Is that so?

— Yes that's how it is

— Then your punishments are really light.

— Li-light? — both fairies repeated. Yuu sat down as she continued to look at the campus

— Although I admit that it hurts, I am able to endure it.

Endure? A lightning bolt? A child?

— Well, you are still young. Children see that they can fight against everything in the world.

— Not at all. I have endured all kinds of torture, even if they tried to poison me they wouldn't succeed. I am immune. Rigorous training from my parents.

— Yuu… What kind of parents do you have?

— Or, both… They are killers.

A silence fell between them.

— Your parents, ¿They are killers? — asked Lilia somewhat cautiously

— That's right — said the boy without caring in the least about the reaction of both fairies — Well to tell the truth my whole family are professional assassins, My great-grandfather, My grandfather's father although I've never seen him but it is said that he is still alive, my grandfather, my father, my mother, Illumi the eldest, the little pig, I mean Miluki, then there's me and kalluto.

Yuu wasn't going to talk about nanika

— Is a really interesting family. I'm curious to know how is it that your human great-grandfather is still alive.

Malleus sat next to him with a smile but some curiosity in his gaze.

— Pff jajaja What is that reaction? Lilia had a very cliché reaction but you jajaja

— Me?!

— Completely, it seems you wanted to kill me hahah.

Yuu wiped away his tears of laughter and looked at Malleus.

—You don't look anything like him, but I admit that both have the same taste in green and black.

— Him?

Yuu smile.

Lilia heard about the training he went through since he was born, trained for a destiny he doesn't want, tortured and manipulated and yet, he was still able to smile. That bitter feeling she felt changed to curiosity.

She wanted to meet the child Yuu spoke of with such emotion.

This is Killua's moment to shine!

Gon is a sweetheart, but out of my favorite characters, Killua takes first place. Something that occurred to me after watching a TikTok video where he shows how strong Killua is!

As Wing said, if they are already shown as monsters when they are children, what will they be like when they grow up?

A new chapter of HUNTER X HUNTER is out

CHEER UP TOGASHIIII

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

I remember reading someone say that they hope Seviathan ISN’T a jerk and if/when he comes to the hotel, he actually wants to help Charlie in her mission of redemption…then ends up with a crush on Vaggie, lol.

Mate, how funny would that be? 😂😂😂 You’re here to genuinely help your ex, then end up falling for her girlfriend. While it isn’t socially acceptable or appropriate, I think it’s cute. I guess Vags has that sort of affect on people.

oh man, if we go the absolute CHAD route for Sevi WHILE imagining him getting a crush on Vaggie... like, dude meets scary lady, doesn't notice how scary his EX gets over him staring at HER girlfriend, and maybe it's time for Sev to have some personal epiphanies?

Seviathan: "Knock knock? Yo Charles-a-lot! This really your hotel?"

Angel Dust: "Oh heyyy, look what the undead boy band dragged in..."

Husk: (snorts)

Charlie: "Sev? SEV! Holy shit what are you doing here!?"

Angel Dust: "Wait a sec, Sev? As in-"

Husk: "Oh shit."

Angel Dust: "Ex boyfriend on the hotel premises oh this is gonna get INTERESTIN'. Bet on how quick he gets maimed?"

Husk: "Fuck no. She'd kill us too."

Angel Dust: "Sigh... S'pose so. Spoil sport spear bitch..."

Seviathan: "I heard about your thing! Figured you could use a hand with the whole... uh... Sinner pet project obsession."

Charlie: "But Isn't there a game on right now-"

Seviathan: "Nah, everything's blocked out by replays of your little slap fight with heaven. Which I totally could've helped with too, if you'd given me a heads up first."

Charlie: "I did call? I said goodbye in case I died and-"

Seviathan: "Didn't hear it. You know I don't check voice mail. Everyone's always blowing up my inbox trying to to hit me up."

Angel Dust: "Oh my fucking gay."

Husk: "Would you hit that?"

Angel Dust: "If I did ya'd have to shoot me afterwards."

Seviathan: "Anyway, that's how I found out you'd actually went ahead and tried this thing out for real! And made a real mess of it. You totally cut off the final quarter of the best game of the year with all that live coverage."

Charlie: "Sorry, sorry- we REALLY didn't have say in the timing on that-"

Husk: "No shit."

Seviathan: "Eh. The team's played like shit anyway ever since I left."

Charlie: "Didn't you get kicked off for hogging the ball-"

Angel Dust: "Shocker."

Husk: "Never would have fucking guessed."

Seviathan: "Not dropping the ball isn't the same as hogging it and I never drop the ball on anything. You sure have though!"

Charlie: "I have? Where? Or er with what??"

Seviathan: "This hotel lobby for a start. Where's the billiards table!"

Charlie: "Ohhh. We don't have one."

Seviathan: "Why the hell not???"

Charlie: "No one's asked?"

Seviathan: "Well what the fuck does everyone here DO all day long? You've got actual people staying here, right? You're not still playing pretend hostess to stuffed animals and stuff?"

Angel Dust: "I kinda hope Vaggisaurus kills him."

Husk: "Don't get your hopes up. You know she's whipped and Charlie's a fucking sweetheart."

Angel Dust: "A bestie can dream..."

Charlie: "No I am NOT playing pretend hostess, thanks for mentioning it by the way, in public, in front of my friends- and yes we DO have guests at the hotel! Some of them here of their own free will even!"

Husk: "Not it."

Angel Dust: "Bullshit."

Charlie: "They have lots of fun activity time too! Even when we're not doing talk circles!"

Seviathan: "Uh huh."

Charlie: "Yes! Mostly we all like watching TV- well almost all of us- or listening to the radio to pass the time, or hanging out chatting, or reading-"

Seviathan: "So they're pussies."

Husk: "Hey."

Angel Dust: "Down, pussycat~"

Husk: (HISS)

Charlie: "They are NOT-"

Angel Dust: "Speakin' of pussy...."

Seviathan: "Yeah we're talking about you, what about it? Anyway."

Seviathan: (puts hand on charlie's arm)

Angel Dust: "Here it comes-"

Seviathan: "I've been thinking about us lately, and-" (spear thuds next to his head) "-SHIT!!! HOLY SHIT?!?!"

Husk: "Damn. She missed."

Angel Dust: "Just an openin' shot, Mr. Whiskers." (rubs all four hands together) "Oh this is gonna be goooood~"

Charlie: "Vaggie!" (BEAMING) "I thought we talked about this?"

Vaggie: (swoops down) "He's not a gust yet, babe, so I can greet him spear first if I want to."

Charlie: "Sev's my ex boyfriend though!"

Vaggie: "I know."

Vaggie: (yanks spear out of wall and holds it under his throat) "What the fuck are you doing here."

Seviathan: "I, uhh- is, is that angelic steel..?"

Charlie: (laughing) "Vaggieeee. You're scaring him~"

Angel Dust: "An' turnin' her on."

Husk: (elbows him)

Vaggie: "We said hotel security would be my thing until the threat of random asshole angel attacks went down, remember hun? This is my day job."

Charlie: "I never said I was complaining! Juuuust commentating!"

Vaggie: "Alright then."

Vaggie: (backs Seviathan against wall with her spear)

Vaggie: "Talk. Now."

Seviathan: (swallows hard) "I'm swinging by to help Charlie with the hotel thing-"

Vaggie: "Why."

Seviathan: "She used to be my girl, a guy's got a responsibility-"

Vaggie: "Did she ask you to."

Seviathan: "No? She, she doesn't have to-"

Vaggie: "Did you ask her if you could help."

Seviathan: "It's no trouble, I don't mind a little extra work-"

Vaggie: "Are you here to ask for a room in our hotel."

Seviathan: "In this place? Fuck no, you should see the digs I have, I've got a-"

Vaggie: "So you're trespassing."

Angel Dust: "Ohhh!"

Seviathan: "I'm wha-"

Husk: "Fucking screwed."

Vaggie: "You came here just to swan all over her hard work and stroke your own ego, is what I'm hearing."

Seviathan: "Hey girl, I'm here to he-ULP-!"

Vaggie: "Shut up." (over shoulder) "Charlie?"

Charlie: "Mm....wellllll... Since he's already here, as long he really does help, I'm fine with it. He's harmless. He'd just... um..."

Husk: "A fuckhead."

Angel Dust: "Don't take my fav word in vain, baby."

Charlie: "He's my ex for a reason."

Husk: "Fuck you."

Angel Dust: "Much better."

Vaggie: "He's your ex for an annoying reason, or for being an actual jerk who's earned getting kicked out on his ass for once in his life kinda reason, sweetie?"

Nifty: (popping up from floorboards) "Is he a BAAAAD BOYYYY~?"

Seviathan: "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAt-"

Vaggie: "What part of shut up there's a spear at your throat don't you get."

Seviathan: (jaw clicks shut)

Charlie: "Nope! He's not a boy boy! Just annoying! Mostly."

Nifty: "DAMN IT."

Angel Dust: "How's the huntin' goin' today, Nif?"

Nifty: (pouts) "The last baby bug got away... I hadn't even finished ripping it's little legs off while the mother bug watched it squirm..." (slinks back under floor)

Everyone else: "....."

Charlie: "... so! (claps hands)

Charlie: "Sev, if you really wanna help out that's fine, we're still finishing up the last touches on the new hotel if you feel like doing a little paint work and furniture moving!"

Seviathan: "....."

Charlie: "Sev?"

Seviathan: "..."

Angel Dust: "Think we broke him."

Husk: "I think it's the fucking spear pressed up against his fucking windpipe."

Charlie: "Oh! Whoops. Vaggie, please?"

Vaggie: ".... fiiiine."

Vaggie: (steps back) (wipes spear on nearby curtains) "Answer her."

Seviathan: (staring) "What's your name?"

Vaggie: "Hotel manager. Answer her."

Seviathan: "Charlie-" (still staring at vaggie) "-I would LOVE to help set up your pet sinner terrarium thing!"

Vaggie: "Our WHAT."

Husk & Angel Dust: "Hey!"

Charlie: "It's a hotel, Sev."

Seviathan: "Uh huh yeah sure, that thing!"

Vaggie: (lifts spear)

Charlie: (gently pushes gf spear back down) "Oh I'm going to regret this... ok. Let's, get you some gloves and stuff."

Seviathan: "Alright!" (holds hand up to vaggie) "Give me some skin!"

Vaggie: "...." (lifts spear again)

Charlie: "Excuse us Sev just ONE moment!"

Charlie: (pulls gf safe distance away)

Charlie: "Vaggie..? You okay?"

Vaggie: "Fine."

Charlie: "You're eye's, um. Twitching." (tenderly brushes fringe away from gf's eye) "Are you okay with this? He doesn't have to stay."

Vaggie: "No. It's fine." (sighs) "I want to be okay with it."

Charlie: "It's okay if you're not!"

Vaggie: "I will be, sweetie. Just give me a minute." (leans up for kiss) "But. I need to go do a Niffty and stab something. Really hard. Right now. And if I stay here one minute more, it's gonna be him."

Charlie: "Okay." (giggles) "Have fun stabbing things that aren't my ex?"

Vaggie: "I'll try to."

Seviathan: "Oh hey I'm awesome at stabbing! And the thrusting!"

Angel Dust: "PLEASE stick around, toots."

Husk: (mumbling) "Please fucking stick him."

Seviathan: "Long hard things are totally my thing, I could give you a few pointers on handling them no problem!"

Vaggie: "No."

Seviathan: "Oh come on, how about a hands on demonstration-"

Vaggie: (at charlie) "Keep him away from the kitchen knifes. He looks like he'd stab himself showing off and make a mess."

Charlie: "Heheh~ I'll try to."

Vaggie: "Good luck with that babe." (smooches her) (flies off to go stab)

Seviathan: "...."

Seviathan: "She single?"

Charlie: "She- NO? She is not??"

Angel Dust: (whisper hissing) "Is he blind? Didn't they just kiss???"

Seviathan: "We'll she's gonna be single soon, but not for long."

Husk: "He's dead."

Demon Charlie: "Her girlfriend is ME, Seviathan."

Seviathan: "Girlfriend? So she's-"

Demon Charlie: "VERY VERY GAY and TAKEN, YES."

Seviathan: "Wait, with you? Seriously??"

Demon Charlie: "Yes. Me. For s e v e r a l. Happy. Years."

Husk: (lifts bottle) "Cheers motherfuckers."

Seviathan: "Ohhh, so all that making out with you she did, it wasn't just her flirting with m-"

Angel Dust: "Holy. Fuck."

Demon Charlie: "SHE WASN't FLIRTING WITH YOU! SHE LOVES ME- SHE WANTS TO KILL YOU!!!"

Seviathan: "I'd let her, to be honest. She's hot."

Husk: "Let her?"

Angel Dust: "Dude."

Husk: "The fuck does he mean, let her? He wouldn't have a fucking choice-"

Demon Charlie: "On second thought maybe you SHOULD'NT help out with the hotel, actually!"

Demon Charlie: (grabbing him by scruff of the neck and marching towards door) "It was VERY nice of you to drop by, PLEASE go have a good rest of your life, you'll probably have a LONGER one if you live it away from here!"

Seviathan: "Aww Charlie, getting nervous over having competition?"

Husk: (spits out drink)

Demon Charlie: "You are SOOOOOO not competition! You might end up being another hotel fatality though!"

Angel Dust: "Bet on which of 'em kills him first?"

Husk: "Shut up I'm trying to listen."

Seviathan: "I just think a woman like that should have her pick from the best hell can offer!"

Demon Charlie: "I'm the princess of hell???"

Seviathan: "Sure, but you hardly ever act like it."

Demon Charlie: "I...! She, she doesn't mind me being like me. She-"

Seviathan: "What, a commanding woman like that is fine with a spineless partner? No offence. But come on."

Angel Dust: "Alright, now I'm gonna kill him."

Husk: "Let her do it herself."

Angel Dust: "Hmph!"

Seviathan: "She's never asked you to try being more of an actual princess sometimes?"

Demon Charlie: "No, she... Not like, not like that..."

Seviathan: "Not like that, huh?"

Demon Charlie: "No." (yanks open door) "And our relationship has NOTHING to do with you."

Seviathan: (grabbing doorframe) "But you know it could."

Demon Charlie: "NO IT WON'T. COULDN'T! WILL NOT, EVER!!!!"

Seviathan: "So why're you throwing me out of your silly hotel thing, then?"

Demon Charlie: "....."

Seviathan: "Scaaaared...?"

Demon Charlie: (drops him) (shuts door) "I trust her."

Seviathan: "Said like no one who ever got dumped so their girl could be with me."

Demon Charlie: "I trust her not to ACTUALLY kill you, I mean."

Seviathan: "Fuck I hope she tries... Maybe I'll let her pin me again."

Husk: (SNORTS) "'Let her'..."

Angel Dust: "He's gonna earn a fucking Darwin award at this rate."

Seviathan: (dusting ash off himself) "Kinda impressed you got all demon-ed so fast for this though. That's new!"

Charlie: "I've told you, it only happens when I'm PISSED. OFF."

Angel Dust: "YEAH DOLLFACE GET HIS ASS!"

Seviathan: "I know but like, it used to take a lot to get you all riled up. I hardly ever got to see you like this in bed even. Maybe if it'd been easier we'd still be a thing?"

Charlie: "You know I realllly really doubt it since I dumped YOU."

Husk: "HA!"

Angel Dust: "WOOOOO! BURRRRRN!"

Charlie: "And I dumped you partly BECAUSE you kept trying to 'rile me up' so you could try having sexy scary demon sex with me!"

Angel Dust: "OHHHHH!!!!"

Charlie: "Not that you ever even DID!"

Husk: "Fuck yes."

Charlie: "Because I always had waaaaay more fun sleeping on the COUCH!"

Husk & Angel Dust: (high five)

Seviathan: "...."

Seviathan: "So that's a no to having a threesome with us once I'm dating your soon to be ex girlfriend, huh?"

Demon Charlie: "SEV-"

Charlie: (deep breath)

Charlie: "... why do you even think you like her, Seviathan? You don't know her. She doesn't like you. You don't even know her name."

Seviathan: "She's hot."

Charlie: "Can We Try To Be More Specific, Please."

Seviathan: "I don't know? It was cute how she tried bullying me against a wall like that. All snapping orders like she was some kinda drill sergeant, or like a hot coach lady, treating me like some kinda bug crawling by her shoe- Who doesn't think that's hot?"

Charlie: "...."

Charlie: "Ohhhh."

Angel Dust: "Oh FUCK!"

Husk: (laughing) "The motherfucking alpha man-"

Angel Dust: "He's a fucking sub!!!!"

Seviathan: "What, like the sandwich? Shit. Are my pants fitting too tight again-"

Charlie: "Angel Dust."

Angel Dust: "Yesssss oh fearless leader...?

Charlie: (covers eyes) (turns) (escapes)

Charlie: "He's all yours."

Seviathan: "Whoa wait, where're you going-"

Charlie: "I'm gonna go surprise MY longtime girlfriend with kisses!"

Seviathan: "Hold on don't leave me with these two! Charlie!?"

Charlie: (already gone)

Seviathan: "For fuck's sake then I'm outta here too! I didn't come here to hang out with lame guys-"

Angel Dust: "Oh my little baby boy."

Angel Dust: (grins) (leans in) ".....how's the idea of a woman standin' over you with a whip make ya feel?"

Seviathan: "Good?"

Angel Dust: "Mm-hmm. An' if ya was wearing a collar?"

Seviathan: "..." (takes off hat) (holds it over crotch)

Husk: "Great. Another horrible memory to drown away with booze." (swigs)

Angel Dust: (draping arm around seviathan) "C'mon, let's find ya a dom who WON'T for real rail you with her spear~"

Seviathan: "Oh whoa."

Husk: "Oh fucking save me booze..." (down in one)

Niffty: (sobbing under floorboards)

Husk: "What the fuck? What's wrong with you?"

Niffty: "Th-the bad boys..." (sniffling) "... why are so many of them turning out LAME? Even the king of HELL asked me if I was OKAY when he stepped out his door in his ducky slippers and found me lying in front of it like a rug! WHAT IS WRONG WITH BAD MEN THESE DAYS!?"

Husk: "...."

Husk: "Here."

Husk: (hands down drink)

Niffty: (hands popping out to grabby grabby) "IT'S SO SAAAAAD HUSK!" (snatches) (gulps) (gulps) (faint thump and snoring)

Husk: "I can't fucking believe I risked my fucking life for this place."

Husk: (smiles anyway)

[princessmaybank]

Ride The Cowboy

Pairings: JJ x BestFriend!Fem!reader

Warnings: MDNI, riding, creampie

Summary: JJ got a new cowboy hat and reader has no idea about the rule.

Authors Note: I had a smut written for a request. It was JJ and reader with the cowboy hat rule but it got deleted! It was anonymous so I hope whoever requested this sees it and enjoys!!!

(Edit: I changed the gif bc he's got a cowboy hat on 🤭 idk who these belong to but they aren't mine so credit to whoever made these!)

JJ found this random black cowboy hat at one of our shops in town. I didn't think he was serious when he said he wanted to buy it because it's not even his style.

Anyway he's been wearing it for a fucking week, trying to act all country and it's so fucking annoying. He has started using a country accent trying to be funny, but it was just so, so lame.

We were at the boneyard having the time of our lives. JJ and I were dancing together, giggling and having some normal fun, until he started talking like he was from Texas.

I was so fed up. I reached for his hat and threw it onto my head. "Look at me, I'm JJ, all I ever do is talk with an accent and twirl around in my cowboy hat!!" I said, very annoyed with a terrible attempt at a country accent.

JJ was staring at me in awe, which got the attention of our friend Pope, whose jaw went slack as well. Pope walked over and rested his arm on JJ's shoulder. "She doesn't know does she?" Pope looked at JJ with the most dead serious look I've ever seen. What the hell was he talking about???

"I don't think she does." He grinned and started laughing. His cheeks flushed red as he looked at his feet then back to Pope. "What are you talking about?!" I asked frantically. "Have fun cowboy." Pope said patting JJ's back while walking away. I give JJ a questioning look.

He got extremely close to my body, yet he was still towering over me. Damn this boy was tall. JJ took my hands in his. "You don't know the cowboy hat rule?" He asked smirking down at me. "These things have fucking rules too???" He giggled. "Yes but this one is probably the most important." Somehow he got closer, which was surprisingly not as uncomfortable as I thought. "What is it??" I asked getting annoyed because he was playing games at this point.

"Wear the hat, ride the cowboy."

His face never changed from that smug little smirk, but my eyes got wide. I hit his chest, he was my best friend. "No way Maybank, that's probably something you made up to get you laid." He grinned. "It's not I swear, if you don't believe me look it up."

Unfortunately I did, and he was right. It was some kind of sick joke. "Well I didn't know so it doesn't count!" I crossed my arms. "Hey, rules are rules baby." He was holding my hips now. Why were butterflies filling my stomach? I've never thought of JJ this way. It would be so wrong. "So is no pogue on pogue macking!" I say trying my hardest to find a way out of this, but of course he's ready for whatever I say. "First of all, John B and Sarah are right over there, basically eating each other's faces. Second of all, it's not macking, it's riding baby." He smiled to himself because he knew he won.

JJ walked us to the Twinkie, where we wouldn't be bothered. "You just want an excuse to fuck your best friend!" I say fighting the best I could. "I could say the same about you! I didn't tell you to steal my hat! And you're still wearing it!" He laughs so hard after he gets his sentence out. I was blushing when I quickly took his hat off and threw it at him.

I was hovering over him, very anxious. He had a huge grip on my hips. "We do not have to do this if you don't want to." He says while holding me up. "JJ, I'm already naked. Plus you said it, rules are rules." Before I could change his mind or my own, I started easing myself down onto his dick. JJ let out a slight hissing sound as I went lower. Not gonna lie, I did need to get fucked. It was probably why I found him so annoying this week.

JJ helped me move at a pace that made us both feel good. "Come here." He pulled me in with a motion of his finger. "Might as well break a rule while we're at it." He smirked before attaching his lips to mine. JJ sat up and put his back against the seat, never pulling out. I pulled his hands away from my hips and to my tits, making him squeeze them as I bounced on his dick all by myself. I couldn't believe I was riding my best friend.

"Fuck Y/N/N don't stop." Woah. JJ called me by my nickname while I was bouncing on his huge cock. How fucking hot. Can't believe I'm saying this but I think I'm catching feelings in the middle of all of this. "Fuck I'm cumming!" I yell as my body starts spasming, I feel his dick shoot his hot liquid into me after I was done. JJ pushed my hips up and down, helping us ride out our orgasms.

He started spooning me after I put my clothes back on and laid down. "JJ I don't wan-" Before I could finish he interrupted me. "Y/N, I can't handle it anymore. I need to be with you, especially now. Now that I've had a little taste of you, I don't think I could let you go and just continue being just your best friend." He was hovering over me now. "I was thinking the same thing." That made us both smile.

We popped up when we heard the side door slam open. "I'm assuming she followed the rules?" Pope giggled staring at JJ, making him giggle as well. They high fived as I rolled over to hide in JJ's chest.

[prettyboyjohnny]

JOHNNY VOICE LINE TRANSCRIPT 🥩

I wrote these out a long time ago but never posted them anywhere! Based on [x].

>Nancy's voicelines<

Notes:

• I could've copied the game subtitles, but I didn't 'cause they suck.

• I haven't played enough Johnny to know where some of these lines start and end. Please let me know if I've made any mistakes in that regard!

• I was gonna include tone indicators, but tone is subjective. No one wants me to mark the Feed Grandpa voice lines as "Flirty."

Thanks!

VOICELINES

Encounter Start

Now look at this! Somebody's ready to fight!

This is gonna end... Very badly for you.

Yeah-ha-ha! Oh, that's it! Hit me...

Imma gut every single one of y'all! [Inhales, laughs under breath] Come on... Come on!

Exit interaction

Nobody leaves until I say so!

Ain't nobody leavin' just yet!

Got it.

Nobody's leavin' alive! Y'all not fast enough! ... Good try, though.

Feed Grandpa

Get your fill, old man.

It always tastes best when it's fresh, don't it?

Here you go, old man.

You're lookin' better already... Now help us!

Oh, you're thirsty today.

Victim found

HA HA! It's playtime!

Heh heh, it's playtime...

Hahahaha, I always find 'em!

You should know better than that! ... Come on out, now.

Hey there! [Laughs]

Well! Look who we got here! [Laughs]

Hit victim

Oh! Now I got ya!

Yeah! Take it! Take it!

It's better if you die right quick! Trust me!

This would be simpler if you would sit still!

Yeah! You gonna be leakin' after that hit.

Idle

Nobody escapes me.

How the hell did those kids find us? [Sighs] I should've been more careful.

If Grandpa was able, this would be over by now... I better go feed him.

Damn it, Johnny... Get your head straight! Come on, now!

I gotta fix this... Now!

Cook seen

I'd watch that tongue of yours, old man... It might go missin' one day.

I thought you knew how to run this household... THIS is a mess!

Damn it, old man! Put those ears of yours to use already!

Where are they?! How the hell did they get loose?! I can't fix this by myself, old man.

Stop barkin' orders at me! You ain't gonna like the results.

Hitchhiker seen

Surround the property with some of those traps already! This is getting outta hand fast!

You're one shifty little sumbitch... I'll give you that. [Laughs]

How you make those weird ass traps of yours, anyway?

Would you. Settle. The Hell. Down already. You're scattering all over the dang place. We gotta focus!

Grandpa is gonna tan our hides if we let them get away. Spread out!

Leatherface seen

That's it, boy... Go kill someone now.

Go on, put that saw to use, big boy! What're you waitin' on?

If I were you, I'd go and check out Grandpa. We're gonna need his help!

Let's go now, boy! Grandpa ain't gonna be too pleased if you let them escape.

Just get outta my way, boy... I'll show you how real killin's done.

Sissy seen

Are you gonna help me out, or just stand there lookin' pretty?

If it ain't askin' too much, before you go and run off again, would you mind helpin' me out?

Before you go runnin' off with those back-house hippies again... Can you PLEASE find these damn kids?!

Sissy, what the hell're you waitin' on? Get to it!

Sissy... Are you even listenin' to me? What's goin' on in that head of yours?! Damn!

Lose enemy first

Aww, you leavin' so soon?

It's alright, big boy's gonna be wearing your face soon enough... After I'm done with you, that is. [Laughs]

You know... I was actually kinda fond of that girl, I-I didn't really wanna hurt 'er... But, as they say... Family first, y'know?

You ever watch someone die? Oh... You ain't never quite the same after that, lemme tell ya.

Ohohoh, you can run all you want... It ain't gonna matter much longer.

Lose enemy sub

[Scoffs] You're all gurgle and no guts! I thought you were tougher than that!

I'm gonna find you... I will! I promise!

You wanna know how your friend died? I can show you!

L-Listen now! E-Everybody's time comes eventually!

The bad man's in me... And you gonna meet 'im real soon!

Lose enemy long

Your little friend put up a better fight than this... Come on... Make it interesting, will ya?!

They always try to hide... It's always the same game... [Laughs]

You folks don't know who you messin' with! Nobody ever gets away from me.

You're just delayin' the inevitable! YOU HEAR ME?

Come on out now, let's play.

I got plenty of space in the cold room for you.

Match start

It's time. [Chuckles] Seems they've got some fight in 'em after all.

I knew I should've handled this myself... I'll fix it.

That's what I get for taking it easy on them. Time for them to join that little friend of theirs.

See blood trail

Oh, this is gonna be easy.

Hey, you okay? You seem to have lost a bit of blood!

Now... let's see where you scurried off to.

You know... Bleedin' like that ain't gonna help your cause!

Don't bleed out on me yet! I need you awake!

See enemy first

Don't worry. I like it when they run.

Look, you're gonna want this to end fast. Trust me on that.

Well, don't run! I just wanna see how it feels.

There you are! [Chuckles] You kinda remind me of your little friend.

See enemy sub

This is pointless, you know. Quit stallin'.

Don't worry... I'll find ya.

[Growls] I'm gonna see your insides before this night's through!

Oh, you ain't gettin' away! I'm keepin' you.

Come on back, now.

Got something I wanna show you! [Laugh]

See family member

Well! Look who decided to lend a hand!

Check the doors and generator. We can't let them leave. You hear me?

Y'all need to start pullin' your weight around here. This is gettin' old!

Grandpa's gonna be in a fit if we let them escape. Start searchin'!

Would y'all... Help me already. PLEASE!

See trapped victim

We gotcha! [Laughs]

You ready to meet the bad man?

You got one!

Looks like you might be hurtin'. Might wanna be watchin' where you're steppin'.

[Laughs]

See victim escape

Maybe I can still catch 'em. Yeah, down by the tracks.

Damn... They're free... For now.

This isn't gonna be good.

Damn it, Johnny! [Scoffs] ... The old man's gonna be riled up now.

Use ability blocked

Ain't no tracks here...

Nah... got nothin'.

Better wait a minute.

Not quite yet ... [Inhales] Almost ready.

Use ability

Time to play. Now... Where did you go?

I'll find ya. Don't you worry about that.

Go ahead and hide... It ain't gonna matter.

Where'd y'all run off to?

Use ability success

[Hums] ... There you are.

They always leave a trail. Always so careless. [Chuckles, inhales] ... This is too easy.

I'm on your tail now!

Execution

You're gonna look real nice... Next to that friend of yours!

That's it... Die for me!

This... Is only gonna hurt... For a minute!

You should've never came here lookin' for that girl!

You ain't gettin' away! I'm keepin' you!

[Last edited March 2024]

[alexihollis]

Boys: Based on a post by @xaiverscorner

"Hey, boys."

Fox was going to kill Ajax.

"How's it goin'?" Ajax asked with a sly smile, leaning on the hightop table, one arm oh-so-casually slung on the back of Fox's chair. That same arm that oh-so-casually shoved off the arm of Chase, who had looked to be working up the courage to move that arm to Fox's shoulder.

"Uh- Good," Chase's eyes were wider than before and he swallowed as he looked to his other two friends. Who seemed similarly nervous.

"What are we drinking?" Ajax asked, gesturing to the four glasses in front of them. "You get my friend here a drink?"

"Yeah. Yeah, do you want anything?" Reese asked. He had been the first one to come over the table, start chatting with Fox, before pointing out his friend over by the bar, Chase. Jared had come along, too, but he hadn't spoken much.

"Nah, Fox and I go way back, I'm just gonna," without even finishing her sentence Ajax took a sip of Fox's drink. What the fuck was she doing. "Whoo! Strong."

It really wasn't. Jenkins watered down his vodka.

"Yep. Definitely got alcohol in there," Ajax nodded. Then, oh-so-fucking-casually, "You know she's seventeen, right?"

"Uh-"

"Well-

"We didn't-"

"Get out of here," Ajax said and they scattered. God-fucking-damnit.

"Seriously?" Fox complained as Ajax slid into one of the abandoned seats. "They were nice."

"If they were really nice, they would have at least known that they were giving someone underage alcohol."

"You give me alcohol all the time!"

"Yeah. Knowing you're seventeen. What are you doing here alone, anyway? Cleon know you're out?" Ajax asked.

Fox bristled. "I'm almost an adult, you know."

Ajax barked out a laugh. "That's a no if I've ever heard one."

"She's on a date," Fox muttered, resting her chin in one hand and digging at the table top with her other.

"Huh. Swan?"

"Went to Over the Rainbow." As a gay bar, they were very strictly 21+. The police hadn't raided much since the Stonewall Riots ten years prior, but the bars remembered and left nothing to chance.

"Oh, yeah, stole my girlfriend, too. And Cochise and Cowgirl, though god knows why they wanted to go," Ajax said.

Fox shrugged, "Cowgirl likes the drag queen performers." Then, "Why aren't you there?"

"Was running a job for Cleon. Just got back, actually. Was swinging by Cleon's to drop off some stuff when I saw your pretty face through the window," Ajax gestured to the large window next to them. "You shouldn't be going to bars on your own."

"Why does everyone treat me like some little kid?" The clenched fist that she had previously been resting on hit the tabletop louder than she meant it, rattling the abandoned drinks and catching attention from nearby patrons for just a second.

"Bitch, it's not about you being a little kid, it's about you being a woman. And a hot one at that, what if one of those fuckers put something in your drink?" Ajax asked.

"You think I can't tell when someone puts something in my drink? I used to do this all the damn time!"

"Cool. Glad to hear you almost got drugged on a semi-regular basis, how the fuck does this not prove my point?"

"I can handle myself," Fox said.

Ajax narrowed her eyes. "Then why join up?"

Fox blinked. "What?"

"If you can handle yourself, if you don't need anyone's help, if you don't want to follow a leader, why become a Warrior at all?" Ajax asked.

"That wasn't..." Ajax's words cut through any momentum Fox had gained. "I like being a Warrior."

"And being a Warrior means Cleon's got rules and one of those rules is don't do stupid shit." Ajax waved a hand around her, gesturing to the bar and Fox.

"You do stupid shit all the time."

"Why do you think I'm always in trouble?" Ajax shook her head, standing up from the table. "Come on. We can put on a movie or something. I think Swan's got some tapes we can steal."

Unfortunately for Fox, that night did not mark the end of Ajax's adventures of chasing boys away from Fox. She made it a sort of hobby.

"If they can't handle me giving them a bit of heat, they ain't good enough for ya," she would say.

Cleon would roll her eyes. Cowgirl tried to help Fox out with a few, but none could withstand Ajax's glares. At one point, Fox tried to get Swan to help.

"No."

"What? What do you mean 'no'?" Fox asked, confused.

Swan shrugged from where she sat on the couch, sipping her coffee. "We talked about it. We have an agreement."

"What do you mean you have an agreement?!"

Swan didn't explain further.

As much as Fox grumbled about Ajax's behavior, though, she couldn't help but think that Ajax would have sniffed out the Bizzies all the way back in Union Square as their small fraction of Warriors scurried down the damn fire escape. She'd have to thank Ajax for looking out for her all those years, Fox thought as her feet finally hit the street.

They needed to make it back to Coney first, though.

--------

I hurt my own feelings with that last couple of lines.

[strniohoeee]

Undefiled

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N is tired of being the butt of every joke with her friends for being a “saint”, so she goes to Matt for help🪷

Warnings⚠️: It’s just cute as shit

This was for my request asking for the reader to ask Matt to be her first kiss🥹

Song for the imagine: Sparks- Coldplay

I knew I wasn’t experienced much, but that never made me feel any type of way. It was completely normal….everyone experiences these milestones at different times in their lives

I never thought twice about it, not till I made some friends who already had crazy sexual experiences. I always sat there listening, but never saying a word. At first this went unnoticed

But the more they spoke about, and the more I grew quiet they would start to give me certain glances. Glances that kind of made me feel left out, and like a fool.

My friends had been spending the night at my house like most girls our age did. And with these sleepovers came talks of boys, and talks of boys meant stories of their interactions. Interactions I’ve never had, therefore I would never have anything to say

“How come you never have anything to say?” One of my friends asked bringing me back to reality

“Hmm?” I said peeling my eyes away from the floor to look at her

“Everytime we talk about our experiences with guys you just go mute” she said

“Oh…well I've never had any of those crazy experiences, so I just listen in” I told her in all honesty

“Oh well that’s okay” she said shrugging her shoulders, which put me at ease

“I’m sure you’ve at least had your first kiss. Tell us about that” my other friend said

“I uh actually never kissed a boy before” I said avoiding eye contact

“Oh…” she responded looking around at everyone else

“Held hands?”

I shook my head no

“Hugged?”

I shook my head no again

“Damn girl nothing?” She had asked me

“Nothing…” I said shrugging my shoulders

“She’s a fucking saint, she has virgin practically written all over her” one of my other friends said

“Hey! That’s not nice” the other one said

“I mean it’s the truth….she obsesses over guys basically drooling over them, but can’t even strike up a conversation with them, why would you think she’d ever kissed someone” she responded laughing

“Ehhh that is true” the other girl said laughing with her

“She’ll probably stay shy and inexperienced forever” she said

“Could you not” I said with a straight face

“I’ll stop when you find a guy, and finally kiss him” she said rolling her eyes

That whole interaction really hurt me, and made me feel like shit. I was just waiting for the right guy to come alone for me to kiss. There was nothing wrong with that, but the whole interaction with them constantly played in my head. I had distanced myself from them as I really didn’t want to be their punching bag for “innocent virgin” jokes.

I started to hang out with my other friends Chris, Matt and Nick because they never brought up things like that, and made me feel comfortable.

Today the triplets had asked me to come over and hangout with them. I agreed, and we were all chilling in Nick's room when the interaction with my “friends” started to play in my head. I was looking at the three of them

I mean they are good candidates….well not Nick because he’s gay, mmm Chris maybe but he’s a player and that’s too much for me, so I finally settled on Matt.

He was so cute, shy, in tune with his emotions, nice and just overall everything I liked in a guy. I’d say I had a bit of a crush on him. I mean what’s not to like??

I was deep in thought about how I would approach the situation, or even if I ever would.

“Hey you okay?” Chris asked looking at me, and thus made me snap out of thought

“Yeah sorry I was just thinking” I said smiling at him

“Thinking what?” Nick asked

“Thoughts” I said laughing

“Okayyy weirdo” Nick said laughing

I laughed with them, and just continued to think about what I wanted to do. I mean I wanted to talk with Matt, but I was going back and forth in my head, and I started to get anxious because of this

“Hey Matt, is there any way I could chat about something with you?” I just randomly said. My mouth was moving faster than my brain was

“Yeah sure” he said, getting up to head out the room so we could chat. We had stepped outside right outside of Nick's bedroom

As we stepped outside I closed the door, starting to get even more anxious

“Are you alright?” He asked once I finally stood next to him

“Um yes I’m okay, but something been on my mind” I told him

“Well I’m like the therapist of the group, so lay it on me” he said laughing

“This is super personal, and I’m not sure if you’ll get uncomfortable” I said wincing at my own words

“I would never! Go on” he responded nodding his head at me to continue

“Well um…..so basically I have these friends who are very experienced as far as sexual intimacy, and they’ve been making me feel some type of way” I told him, but before I could finish he cut me off

“Screw them who gives a shit. Virginity is a fucked up social construct” he told me

“No I know, but umm they just always call me a saint and innocent because I’ve never kissed a guy. I mean I’ve never even held a guys hand, or hugged one in a romantic way” I said back to him

“Ohhh I see” he said looking a bit confused

“I was wondering if you’d be willing to maybe be my first kiss?” I asked him. Cringing internally at home embarrassed I felt

“You want me to be your first kiss? I mean yes I’ll do it, but me?” He asked puzzled

“Yes you! I feel like you’re the only person that I’d enjoy kissing plus I know you” I told him blushing a little bit

“Oh uhh thanks” he said also blushing

“Okay sooo teach me how to kiss” I said jumping straight into it

“Well first come closer” he said, and to this I walked directly in front of him waiting for further instructions

“And then uhh…you could lick your lips, but you’re wearing chapstick so you’re good” he said as he licked his own lips a little bit

“I’ll take the lead” he said

“Well duh Matt I’ve never done this” I said laughing at him

“Right….sorry” he said shaking his head

He looked into my eyes, and then down at my lips. My heart was racing so fast I could hear it in my ear drums, and I’m sure he could hear it too.

He placed his hand on my cheek, and slowly leaned in tilting his head to the right a little bit, shutting his eyes. So I such my eyes as well and leaned in slightly

Matt pressed his lips against mine, and for a moment I just stood with no movement, until finally my brain turned on.

I kissed him back, and then we separated for a second and went back to kiss again.

When we pulled away my face was blushed, my pupils were dilated, and I’m sure my heart was about to burst out of my chest.

“How was that?” He asked looking into my eyes

“That was perfect” I said smiling at him

“Want one more for good measure?” He asked with a sly smile

“How could I resist” I said rolling my eyes in a playful way

So he went back and kissed me a few more times. That was until Chris banged on the glass of the window, and when we looked over his jaw was dropped

“OH MY FUCKING GOD” he screamed laughing like a schoolgirl and running to get Nick

“This kid” Matt said laughing as we walked back into the house.

The End

Whoever requested this I HOPE YOU LIKEEEE, and now back to writing. I got 9 more stories to go😁🤭

-J💅🏽

[slasher-smasher]

Tamp-On the Heroics (Homelander x gn!reader)

Two fics in one day?? Yeah, I am absolutely bored and highly caffeinated.

This is not meant to be taken seriously. I thought the idea would be silly and funny.

Words: 1,618

Masterlist: here

Warnings: None, unless you consider ridiculousness a warning.

Reader is written as GN but they do own a feminine product. I just used it as a plot device.

Not beta read.

Summary: Homelander finds himself in a sticky situation when his son, Ryan has an accident and he grapples with the challenges of parenthood and unexpected emergencies. Being bombarded with texts from a hysterical supe boyfriend was not something you were expecting when you went to work that morning.

Your phone goes off five times during your shift at your job. At first you didn’t think anything of it. Probably just a telemarketer or some scammer calling to let you know about your “cars extended warranty”. Jokes on them, you don’t own a car. Why ride when you can fly first class on Homelander airlines?

When your phone rang a third time, you got a little curious. Maybe it was someone trying to get a hold of you. But who? Your friends are here at work with you. Your boyfriend Homelander rarely uses his phone to get a hold of you, plus he would just fly over if he really needed something. You tried sneaking your phone out to check before you boss walked like a prison warden, hands laced behind their backs, eyes scanning for anything they can chew you out for that is preventing you from doing your work. You weren’t really the best at subtlety so when you attempted to pull your phone out from your desk drawer, you almost slammed the drawer on your fingers in your hurry to close it as your boss poked their head around the corner to call you for a quick meeting in the staff room.

Damn.

After the fifth time was when you got worried. You swiped your phone then rushed into the restroom locking the door behind you. Seeing eleven notifications of missed texts made you feel a surge of panic. Your fingers tremble slightly as you unlock your phone to scroll through the messages.

Heroic Hunk : Hey pumpkin, just checking in on you. I would fly over but Ryan is visiting. 😊

Heroic Hunk: Oh, I just remembered, did you put milk on the shopping list? We are going to need more. Ryan keeps guzzling down MY milk when he puts that fucking sugary strawberry powder shit in it. I swear he was dropped as a baby. Fucking gross.

Heroic Hunk: Precious, funny story… So I was helping Ryan practice his flying and we thought playing catch would have been a fun challenge. He got a bit too into it and there may have been an accident.

Heroic Hunk: Ryan flew face first into a tree…🤦🏼

Heroic Hunk: Okay, so Ryan just had a nosebleed, and you are not picking up. I'm freaking out a bit. What do I do???

Heroic Hunk: Seriously, what's the protocol here? Should I call a doctor? Should I fly him to a hospital? Why are you not picking up??

Heroic Hunk: I'm starting to panic a bit... his nosebleed won't stop! What if it's something serious? I NEVER HAD A FUCKING NOSEBLEED BEFORE!!

Heroic Hunk: I tried using a tissue, but it's not helping much. Should I try something else? How can my kid bleed so much? ANSWER THE GODDAMN PHONE!

Heroic Hunk: Okay, update: I found something in the bathroom. I saw this being used in a movie. Going to see if it works. I’ll call you after.

Heroic Hunk: It seemed to work, but now I'm worried I've done something wrong. 😬

Heroic Hunk: Update: The bleeding stopped, but Ryan's giving me weird looks. Was that a bad move? Please advise a.k.a call me back.

Heroic Hunk: Crisis averted! 💪 Love you! 😘

You were so confused and incredibly worried now. What the fuck has happened? Why did John think having a young child—who recently just learned how—fly through a forest AND play catch at the same time was a good idea? You can’t leave your boys alone for two seconds without something either burning down or someone ends up bleeding.

You looked at the time on your phone before you pressed the call button next to the name he put in for himself.

It rang twice before he picked up.

"Hey pumpkin. You ready for me to pick you up?” He answered jovially. Like he didn’t send a plethora of panicked texts your way just an hour ago.

“Hi sweetheart. I am really sorry I didn’t answer my phone earlier. I was in a meeting. Is everything ok?” You tried to keep your voice even and calm.

“Oh yeah. Everything is all hunky-dory. Just a little mishap. We are currently watching one of my movies. Kid is mesmerized.” Homelander replied with pride and a laugh, you could hear the tv in the background. Sounds of explosions and guns going off.

“Well ok. Yeah. I am ready. Need to file away some papers but I’ll be done by the time you get here.” You sighed, still a little unconvinced but you will find out everything yourself when you get home.

“Alrighty! I’ll be there in a sec. I’ll bring your jacket too since it’s starting to get chilly. Love you.” He made a kissing noise into the phone which you replied with your own I love you too and kiss.

He was right. It was getting chilly as you waited on the roof of your office building. You started using the roof for drop offs and pick ups when using the front entrance got too hectic. Having a celebrity boyfriend who was the most powerful supe came with the pains of having people fall over themselves just to get an autograph or photo with him. The swarms got so bad that you almost broke your arm being tripped as they rushed to meet their idol. That almost ended in a bloodbath which would not go over well with your boss when you had to explain that your short-tempered man-child of a partner lasered half of the employees over an accident.

“You look like you need a ride.” Homelanders' teasing voice snapped you of your thoughts making you look up as he slowly floated down to greet you. His signature cape swishing in the cool breeze. God he was beautiful. Blue pools that sparkled with mischief. His smug smile and corny jokes made your heart race and you couldn’t help but laugh.

You were so gone for this man.

“Hey there handsome.” You greeted as you settled yourself into his warm embrace.

“You ok? You look tired.” He asked, concern can be seen in his face handing you your jacket.

“Yeah, it was just a long day. Let's go home and get some dinner. Ryan is probably hungry.” You answered as you put it on and relaxed into his arms when he wrapped his arm under your knees and lifted you easily. Thank you super strength.

You could have fallen asleep with how gentle he was with you during the short flight back but you forced your eyes to stay open.

Landing softly in the front yard of the cabin you pulled him down to plant a kiss on his lips and thanked him for the lovely ride as always. Full stars on yelp. He let out a chuckle and took your hand into his as you walked into the house.

You let out a satisfied sigh as the heat from the fire in the fireplace greeted you. Looking around the living room you didn’t see Ryan which made you frown. He usually rushes to give you a big hug but he was nowhere to be found.

“Ry? I’m home.” You called out in a normal voice. Knowing he inherited his fathers sensitive hearing so there was no need to be loud.

“I’m in my room! I’ll be right out!” You heard him respond from deeper into the home. You looked back at Homelander who just shrugged.

“Probably playing with his little Legos. He said something about recreating a scene from the movie before I left to get you.” He supplied as he walked into the kitchen.

That boy and his Legos, you thought as you followed Homelander who poured two glasses of milk and handed you one.

“Did you get my text about the list? If not, then I can have someone drive out here and get everything delivered.” He asked before he took a sip of his favorite beverage. Holding your with both hands as you also took a drink. You were not as big of a fan as Homelander is but you do enjoy the cold taste of milk occasionally.

“I did but I wanted to ask Ryan if he wanted to go with me tomorrow. You know he likes looking at the Legos in the toy section,” You said as you took another sip then a thought popped into your head. ”Speaking of text, what did you end up using for Ryan’s nosebleed anyway?”

Homelander finished his glass with a large gulp licking his lips as he set the glass down on the counter. He looked at you with a proud grin which if you were honest, made you suspicious.

“I couldn’t believe it worked but it makes sense with what it is actually designed to do. Just a different hole.” Homelander lifted his hand, pointing at the ceiling and twirling it in a circle indicating to turn around.

Wait, what? Hole?

You gave him a confused look then turned around and spat out your mouthful of milk as you saw Ryan walk into the living room with a large grin that made him look even more like his father. What ruined the similarity was the dangling string that was attached to a piece of cotton shaped into a bullet that was shoved up his nostril.

“OH MY GOD. JOHN!” You couldn’t breathe due to the giggles shaking your body.

“What? It does the same thing!” He defended.

You completely forgot you had tampons in your bathroom.

“Well it did stop the bleeding,” you managed to breathe out as you walked over to give the boy a hug.

You love your boys so much.

[jazeswhbhaven]

From what I've been seeing it feels like PB is focusing on quantity over quality. Things like Obey Me, TWST, and Nu-Carnival has a sizeable group of characters, but they're not too huge so it allows them to flesh each one out to a certain extent, but then they can introduce a diverse set of cards on each of them so you're not starving too much.

WHB has not only has 6 Kings and one more on the way, but they also keep introducing more nobles and angels. In a way it's not bad, but this is why I seriously feel it is a case of quantity and not enough quality. From what I've seen in this community, characters that have been in the game since Day 1 are being super neglected. Then we a have every new L card released being paywalled, nightmare passes that also have the top rewards paywalled, are more frequent, even this time around the S+ card requires more gold keys and it doesn't have anything remotely special about it whereas the last S+ did which was extremely exclusive only. Honestly it's...really sad. Now you don't NEED these cards and I'm not asking for freebies, but in the end they are asking for your life savings for even just the decent stuff, and then you still have to deal with the gacha to do that.

I personally need a decent amount of characterization to really appreciate a character so I do appreciate the world building but no character has stuck with me yet. So everytime a new one is released I go: "Okay but what about like...the existing ones?" Our last one was Leraye, which I'm sorry, it's just a reskinned of his OG card and I found that really scummy which was probably why he was locked through achievements which...was the saving grace still it was the only time it happened. The story was nice though.

I don't want to come off as ungrateful and I probably am, but I just don't understand PB's decisions on what they're doing anymore. We can't use the "they're a small company" card, I'm sure they're not the only small company, but I don't have any sources, but so far this is the first time I seen company really just throw their community into a blender like this...then again I only played like 3 other gachas which isn't a lot.

💭

hey there 💭 anon!

This observation came right in time with how I'd like to pretty much introduce the game to new players that are flocking in.

PB's decisions as of late to change how we get currencies, paid banners, and the progression of the main story and character building has been a damn journey.

I don't think you're ungrateful, I wouldn't call anyone that honestly because as the consumer YOU are the the one, p2p or f2p, in the end that has be entertained by this nsfw game. The only one in existence that is catered to both women and men audiences. With that in mind, you'd expect to see something worth buying/taking up nearly 8gb of space on your phone for.

When the game was first teased, me and my friend were talking about it and she was overwhelmed by the amount of characters they kept showing, I met her through the Obey Me fandom, so that was our bread and butter for the majority of conversations. When I moved on to WHB, she didn't come with, she stayed for like maybe a week or two and dropped it. I forget mostly why which I could ask her again on her opinion.

But I'll let you in on something I saw the other day, the community over in LaDS has been having some issues with their banners/other gacha related things as well stating that this recent banner is driving players away. I don't play LaDS but PB isn't the only company it seems starting to switch things up when it comes to decisions.

The S+ cards confuse me because what they introduced was hey here's beach Rara (Raphael) and he has an adore mode, a story with mild spice, and you chats/more lore about this bitey boi. I had so much fun reading through that. Amy and Sitri's all we get are the likability things and well from the previous expectation? That made me shake my head. (also for the extra gold keys thing, apparently it's only that high if you want to get it early, the card is going into the banner immediately after the event so in theory we all literally could have waited to pull them so we wouldn't have to spend that amount of gold keys)

As far as content goes, I think ultimately there's too many characters to work with. If anyone on the staff has a brain like me, it would be very easy to neglect characters here and there. I also do not like that Gehenna has yet ANOTHER noble (sorry Amy) but other countries are lackin'.

Also unrelated...WHERE IS GEHENNA'S GROUP PHOTO U G H.

Niflheim needs one too.

All in all I hear you. Chapter 6 and Mammons/Amy's events though have me believing that the best has yet to come, these banners though....we will see... Maybe things will pop off when Asmodeus debuts..

[serensama]

Dr, Who?

Thursday Bangers - ongoing weekly prompts by the amazing @woundedsoul12 . I will be doing my best to create a story out of each lyric given to me and will be updating this post as we go along to keep it all in one place!

Prompts provided thus far:

I wonder if your therapist knows everything about me - "The Last of the Real Ones", Fall out boy

A hundred days have made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face - Here without you, Three Days Grace

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all - Lover by Taylor Swift

I'm prepared to sacrifice my life I would gladly do it twice - Mercy by Shawn Mendes

——— 

Lilya managed to catch herself before falling onto her face, pulling away from the insistent hands urging her to stay warm in bed. 

“Stop it! I have to go, I’m going to be late!” 

“Just call in sick!” 

“I have a really important- let go of my bra!- appointment.” 

“But I was hoping to get to know you more.”

“Yes, that would be lovely. But I have got to go-”

“What’s the address of your office? I want to take you out for lunch, seeing as we can’t have breakfast together.” 

“Oh um, yeah- sure. I’ll text it to you, see you then!” 

“Hey- wait-”

She didn’t wait for him to finish his sentence before bolting out of his apartment. It was only as she slid into the back seat of her uber that she realised she didn’t have his phone number. Or remembered his name. Curse Teia for calling her out to bitch and moan about her latest break up with Viago and bullying her into drinking all those shots. Before she knew it, her friend had drunk dialled her stepbrother and the two were back together and disappearing into a darkened corner of the upscale bar, leaving her alone with her phone, two abandoned shots and the arrival of a really, really attractive man who had no right to look as good in a suit as he did. 

She further cursed Teia for her buzz, the liquid courage in veins making her brave enough to give voice to her curiosity if he looked as good out of the suit as well. He was surprised, pleasantly so, but he confirmed that he would not be disinclined to help sate her inquisitiveness. 

The drinks remained abandoned. A text sent to Teia to let her know she was okay, along with a selfie to show her who she was leaving with- and the next thing she knew they were in a cab, with his lips on her neck and his hand up her skirt. So reckless. She hadn’t had a one night stand since her final year in university. This man however, was much more skilled than the football player she had left the bar with so many years ago. 

It was neither here nor there. It was just some fun, a great story to tell Teia and a fond memory of the sweet one night stand. Lilya rushed into her rooms and waved at her 11:00am appointment, patiently waiting for her with a kind smile. 

“I’m so sorry I was late! Please give me two seconds and I’ll be right with you!” 

——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— ——— 

She was right. It was an important appointment. Her patient had a breakthrough, understanding the complexities of what he had been through and knowing it was okay not to be okay with any of it, she almost cried with him as he broke down for the first time since he was a child. They booked in a time to see each other the following week and she was so damn proud of him, she asked if he would be adverse to a hug. 

“If you asked me two years ago? I’d have said no. But today? After that- with you?” He smiled, opening his arms out awkwardly like a robot whose arms weren’t oiled enough, creaking from the strain. 

Lilya smiled at her receptionist who had a warm expression on her face at the heartfelt interaction. The man had come leaps and bounds into himself since he’d started seeing her. 

“Cousin? Are you alright?” 

Lilya looked up, stiffening as she pulled out of the friendly embrace. She turned and saw the face of the man she literally ran out on, fresh as a daisy, and her in her day old clothing and with his cologne still on her skin. 

“Yes, I’m fine. Well. Closer to being fine anyway, thanks to Dr. de Riva here,” Lucanis grinned at her, pushing her toward the door to meet his cousin. “Dr de Riva, this is my cousin, Illario. I’ve spoken about him before.” 

Lilya paled and swallowed, nodding at the taller man who was staring at her in shock. 

“She… she’s your doctor?” 

“This is… Illario?” 

Lucanis smiled and encouraged the two to shake hands, completely oblivious to the weird tension that came upon the two most important people in his life. 

“Um… nice to meet you doctor… Lucanis has told me so much about you,” Illario said, finally finding his tongue. He held out his hand and waited for her to take it. 

Lilya blinked at it and only forced out of her daze when her receptionist cleared her throat. “Um, yes. Yes, of course! Hello- nice to meet you too, Illario.” 

He smiled at her widely, his thumb caressing the back of her hand. 

“Lucanis has told me all about you, too.” 

His smile faltered. 

Shit. 

——— 

Just over three months. Just three. And his cousin still would not forgive him. 

For the third time that week, Illario had tried to visit Lucanis and beg for his forgiveness. How could he have possibly known that the woman he randomly met at a bar and had sex with was his therapist? He had never met the woman before! Would that have made him stop? No. But he would have at least had a definite pause before doing what he did. There would have been a pause! Unfortunately, his cousin did not appreciate the ‘theoretical pause’ and slammed the door in his face once again. 

Because of their little interlude, the doctor- Lilya de Riva ( which he only found out after a thorough thrashing he got from his cousin) - had cancelled all upcoming appointments with Lucanis, saying some ridiculous thing about her not being able to ethically treat him moving forward and that there could be no room for bias and whatnot… She then referred him to an Associate Professor Emmrich Volkarin, told him that he was famous in their field and she even studied under him. That he was so renowned that his patients swore he was so perceptive that he could hear thoughts they didn’t dare speak, giving them agency to find real acceptance and peace. Even with all that, his cousin was furious at the situation. At him.  “I trusted her, Illario! She was a confidante, someone I could talk to about anything without judgement or worry she was trying to find an angle to exploit. She was opening doors I had long thought were closed off and you, you slammed them all shut again!” 

He had punctuated that particular discussion with another slam of the door. 

And people thought he was dramatic. 

Illario sighed and left the cup of coffee from Cafe Pietra on the welcome mat and walked back down to the town car waiting for him. It had been three months since Lucanis had joined him going to and from work. Three months with Caterina hounding him to ‘fix his cousin’. Three months since he had last seen her. 

Illario raised his eyebrows in a quick thank you to his chauffeur for opening the door and slipped into the corner of the seat, his right knee perched upon the leather upholstery without Lucanis frowning at him to move his damn leg. He took a sip of his lukewarm coffee and tried to forget about the pretty girl smiling at him at the bar. Bright green eyes, long raven hair and a grin that could light up even the darkest corners of a club. 

He had every intention of chatting her up on his own and then she giggled and picked him up. Illario was suddenly very grateful for the company car breaking down that had caused him to wait at the nearest establishment to kill time before his taxi came. The girl wasn’t after his money, not by the expensive suit she wore or by the wallet full of cash and black credit card he spied when she paid her tab. She didn’t know his name, and she had clearly already been there for a long time before him which meant she wasn’t hanging out trying to catch him specifically. 

No, this woman just thought he was attractive, and that was really attractive to him. 

Illario scoffed at himself as he finished off his coffee, wincing at the last of the tepid liquid. He was being stupid. It was a one night stand, he had had so many before, he didn’t know why this one refused to leave him. He’d find himself thinking about it whenever his mind wandered- in between his grandmother nagging him, his cousin berating him, his constant responsibilities within their company- she’d slip right in, uninvited. 

He’d remember her laughter, the way she kicked off her designer shoes without a care and didn’t complain at the bites and marks he left on her body. The way she seemed so in sync with him even though they’d barely said a word to each other- it was madness that he was hung up on her, acting like she was someone he had a relationship when for all intents and purposes, he probably wouldn't be able to identify her in a line up if pressed. 

You’re such a bad liar, you can’t even lie to yourself. Pathetic. 

He banged his fist against the door, ignoring the way the driver looked up at him in the rearview mirror. His memories of her were more vivid than any of his other flings or so called relationships. Knew how small her hands were compared to his, the feel of the skin on her neck, the heat of her curled against his body when she slept. He could barely remember Zara and he had dated her for more than two years. Illario groaned at the thought of the heinous witch, thanking the universe for allowing him the clarity to let that woman go when he did. Poison. That was what she was. He should have listened to Lucanis when he told him as much. 

Then he met her. Miss- no, Doctor, Illario, respect her accomplishments-- Doctor de Riva and he was reduced to a sad, pining mess. He had tried to talk to her, to speak on behalf of his cousin to continue treating him, and when she refused to take his calls at her office, he was relegated to speaking to her perky secretary who said she was unable to speak to him and to leave him number and she would return his call. She never did. He just wanted to talk to her. Prove to himself that he was just imagining things and there wasn’t anything special there, that he wasn’t missing out something he had long convinced himself was not for people like him. At least not when Caterina had planned out both his and Lucanis’ lives to a tee. Butterflies in his stomach and fluttering hearts for pretty girls with a smile he still dreamed about were not things his grandmother cared about. 

The car stopped and Illario checked over his reflection, double taking when he thought he saw the beginnings of a grey streak on his temple, breathing easier when he realised it was just a smudge on the window. All the stress he was under was not good for him. 

It was probably best for him to try to find a therapist. 

And he knew just the one he wanted to speak to. 

——— 

The car door swung open and Illario stepped out, ensuring he took the dossier he had been studying for the last four days before his meeting with the Cantori Family, the largest entertainment agency in the country. Nights spent poring over their figures for the last ten years and dismantling their biggest wins and losses had left him exhausted, but he was prepared and knew that this partnership would be of benefit to both their companies- and maybe then Nonna dearest would finally get off his back. Until she found something new to bug him about. Or remember something old. She wasn't picky when it came to busting his balls. 

The elevator opened and a familiar, sickly sweet scent assaulted his nose, his mouth twisting with obvious distaste. He hadn't smelled that perfume since- 

Fucking fuck on a fucking cracker. 

“... Zara.”

She was like a demon or something. If he said her name or thought about her enough times, she would be summoned to haunt him forever. 

“Amatus!” she squealed, bopping on the spot in her excitement to see him. “It has been so long, why have you not returned any of my calls?” Illario turned to his driver and stopped him from coming with him, not wanting another person to be subjected to whatever she had planned. He needed to have a long chat with their security team. How they could have missed a psychopath in their building waiting around in an elevator, riding it for goodness knows how long obviously waiting for someone was beyond him. Someone’s head was going to roll for the oversight. Preferably Zara’s, but he was too pretty to face prison over the likes of her. He stepped into the elevator, his skin already crawling from the idea of spending more than 20 floors in her company in such a confined space with her specific brand of bat-shit crazy. 

“Oh, I don't know why, Zara. Maybe because we broke up eight, no, nine months ago! How do you keep getting my numbers? I’ve changed it five times!” She pouted as if she didn’t hear him, which was probable, the woman only ever heard what she wanted to and whenever she heard otherwise- she would do everything in her power to change it. And whether he liked to admit it or not, the Renata family was powerful, holding too much stock in the Venatori venture capitalist group- almost making the wench untouchable. Almost. 

“Silly boy. You know my brother Calivan likes to keep tabs on everyone for me. I’ve left so many messages and still you won't call. Are you still playing hard to get?” His hand gripped around the folder, papers wrinkling under his hold. “I have not placed a restraining order on you Zara, out of respect for your family and your position, but if you do not stop this, I will do it. I have no qualms about dragging your ass through the dirt if it means you will finally leave me and my family alone.” Zara’s sweet smile turned sour, her top lip curling into the same sneer she made when he broke up with her. The smaller woman pushed him into the back wall of the elevator, pressing her body against his as if that were enough to coax him back to her bed. The witch had him convinced that she cared for him, that she wanted him to reach his full potential, and would help him to be the one Caterina chose to succeed her. He didn’t want to listen to Lucanis who tried to tell him she had attempted to seduce him and when rejected by his cousin, she went to him. He tried to tell him that she was obsessed with the Dellamorte family since university, and she didn’t care if she got in through either of them. There was something grander afoot than either of them knew but Lucanis knew they should not get into bed with Zara, and definitely not with the Venatori. But Illario was always stubborn. And it took almost allowing some Venatori executives to strong arm their way into their inner sanctum for him to wake up and realise that his cousin was right (he was always right, he was Lucanis ‘Maker-Blessed-and-can-do-no-wrong’ Dellamorte.) 

Zara dragged her blood red nails along his neck, her mouth too close to his for his comfort. “Don't deny me, Illario,” she cooed, pressing her hips into his, “we were together for three years-”

“-Two! We've been broken up for nearly a year!-” “-what we have is special. No-one knows you like I do. No-one understands you and what you crave like me. No-one can love you… not like I can.” Illario swallowed. She never learned. Always using his insecurities against him and trying to make him believe he was the lesser Dellamorte. But he had learned better. Even met someone who seemed to click with him, more than he ever expected to with such a brief meeting. It wasn’t just the sex, though the sex was… the sex had been something else, but the way they held each other through the night, the wordless way they knew what the other needed and the genuine way she smiled at him- like she'd always known him- it was like she was literally dreamed to existence just for him. “Ahh, see, I knew it! There’s the Illario I know and love. Always up and ready- I knew you still wanted me. Loved me. You will for the rest of your life,” she grinned, incorrectly assuming his hardening cock was because of her. Her long fingers trailed down his body and he wanted to be ill, the feel of her touching him forcing every hair on his body to rise in revulsion. 

He pushed back firmly, keeping his hand between them to ensure she stayed away. “I don’t love you. I don’t want you. This was just my body reacting to the thought of someone I actually desire.” She scoffed, her pretty features darkening with jealousy. “You’re not with anyone else- there’s no way you’ve moved on from what we had. What we have!” The elevator bell rang and the doors opened to the top floor, reserved only for his family’s offices. “There was nothing then, nothing now and nor will there ever be, leave or you will be escorted out!” he snapped, walking out hurriedly, hoping to escape her. “Don't you walk away from me Illario Dellamorte! You’d be nowhere without me, just some piddling paper pusher in your grandmother’s company behind your cousin. I made you someone!” she shrieked, eyes glassy, as if she could feel actual emotion. The god damned ghoul. 

He could not let that slide. His pride would not allow it. “Listen here you knuckle dragging thundercunt. I was always someone. And I am better for not having you in my life, you are nothing but rot. Anything you touch is infected with it. It took me long enough to realise that you were killing me from the inside out- I will never want you. And if by some horrible luck I do think of you, it will only be with regret, for losing two years of my life beside a disease parading around in human skin. Get. Out.”

Illario felt lighter than he had in months releasing that tirade upon his bloody ex. Did she deserve it?... Eh, kinda. But he had been so pent up for the last couple of months he had to unleash it on someone. Who better than her?! “No, I don’t accept this!” she cried out, her heels clicking on the floor behind him. “You’re just upset, it’s okay. We can talk it out and we’ll be stronger, Amatus, you’ll see. I was just angry and said some things I didn’t mean. Of course you were, are, someone. I wouldn’t want to be with you if you weren’t.” 

That’s even worse, you daft bitch.

“I’ve told you. I’ve moved on! I don’t want you anywhere near me, her or my family- do you understand?” he called out over his shoulder, ignoring the worried looks from the PA’s scattered around the floor. “Fletcher, get security on the line. Get this woman escorted out immediately. She is not to be allowed near the premises, understood? And set up a meeting with the de Acutis’- I want to know how she even got in!” “Yes, Illario. Right away,” they answered, automatically picking up the phone. Zara rushed over to Fletcher's desk and tore the handset from their hand and slammed it back down, earning an unimpressed glare from them. “Great, now I’ll have to disinfect my phone.” 

The woman skittered after Illario, cursing after one of her heels snapped from under her, calling out to him as she collected herself. “There’s no one else. Stop lying to me. If you want me to apologise, I’ll apologise. Don’t just cut me out of your life for no good reason!”  He almost turned around again, too tempted to strangle her with his bare hands, until he saw her. Same long, dark hair. Creamy skin and bright eyes. Mercy, he could see the green of them from where he stood. She was standing outside his office, looking far too tempting in a simple shift dress and heels than she probably meant to.

“Mr Dellamorte, I hope you forgive my intrusion, but my assistant refused to continue working for me unless I managed to stop you from calling my rooms,” she explained, her arms linked behind her back, pushing her chest forward and creating the most alluring line of curves down her body. “Would you have a minute to spare for me?”

He spied Zara turning the corner, hissing his name.

Illario looked back to Lilya, who was looking at the crazed, hobbling woman coming toward them with a furrowed brow, confusion and apprehension apparent on her beautiful face. He handed the dossier to a nearby assistant and turned back to his unexpected guest, flashing her with what he hoped was a charming, but apologetic grin.

“Certainly. I’ll even give you two minutes. But until then, I pray you forgive me, Doctor.”

And before she could ask what she needed to forgive him for, he promptly pulled her into a kiss.

——— 

Her lips were softer than he remembered. Plush and smooth as he moved his mouth over hers. He had intended for it to be a long, chaste peck, but then she kissed him back. Tentatively at first, like she was shy, until she felt his tongue lick at the seam between her lips, and she responded in kind. Illario couldn’t believe his luck when her arms linked around his neck, and she stepped closer to him, her hips pressed against his own. 

If he were being completely honest, he had totally forgotten that she-beast Zara was still in the room. That was, of course, until she grew a second head and started screeching out of it. Or at least that's what it sounded like. 

“Illario Dellamorte! Who the hell is she?!” she shrieked, stomping her way closer to them. Much to his surprise, Lilya stepped beside him and held his hand, an action that Zara did not miss, causing even more unpleasant, indignant noises to erupt from her. “How could you do this to me?” 

Lilya looked up at Illario, a wary expression on her face as her eyes darted between him and Zara. “I… I’m not sure what’s going on here. Illario, who is this woman?” 

Seeing as he was probably already going to be killed by Dr de Riva as it was, he didn’t see the problem in dying a second time over if it meant that he’d finally get the crazy ex off his back. Besides- if he was going to hell, he may as well enjoy the descent as much as he could. He hushed her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders protectively, drawing her into his side. His other hand smoothed down her long locks and held her face tenderly, concern playing across his handsome features. 

“Lilya? Mi Amor- are you okay?” 

Oh, he was asking to be kicked in the balls by this woman. When they finally got to speak to each other alone, it would just be two minutes of her just kicking the shit out of him. 

She blinked but recovered quickly and nodded, her small hands curling into the lapels of his navy overcoat as though she were nervous, or possessive, or both. He had to hand it to the doctor; she quickly cottoned on to what he needed from her and played her part well, considering she had only witnessed the brief interaction between him and Zara. Another pang of guilt hit him for being the cause of his cousin’s no longer being able to be treated by her, but it was almost worth it to see Zara almost go full exorcist mode. He only hoped she wouldn’t start puking up pea soup all over the carpet. Caterina had insisted on the white carpet and would be terribly put out to see it stained. 

Zara yelled out his name again, and he ignored her, captivated by the clear green irises that were staring up at him. He’d dreamed of her eyes for weeks, seeing them up close and in the light of day, he knew he’d be dreaming of them for many more. When he continued to disregard her, the woman rifled through her bag and threw her phone at his face. If he hadn’t been eye fucking the pretty doctor in his arms and been in the right state of mind, he might’ve stepped aside - but instead, he was beaned right on the corner of his eye. Say what you would about Zara, the bitch could aim. 

“Fuck. That was meant for you, you homewrecking whore!” 

Then again, maybe not.  

“Hey, ‘Lario, can you see me? How many fingers am I holding up?” she asked, her tone serious, with two fingers held up in front of him. He answered, and she smiled, wincing at what she knew was going to be one hell of a shiner. Once she was satisfied that he wasn’t in any immediate danger, she stepped out in front of him, like she was the one protecting him. 

“I am not a homewrecking whore. You are just a woman who can’t come to grips with reality. This man does not want you-” 

“You’re wrong!” 

“I assure you, I am not.” 

“Illario isn’t seeing anyone. He’s just doing this to make me feel bad for the rough patch we’ve had-” 

Lilya scoffed, a cold, heartless noise he would have never thought would come out of her. He almost got hard just thinking about her being so ruthless. Fuck… maybe he really did need to see a therapist. Who the hell in their right mind got off on that? 

“My dear Miss… Zara, was it?” Lilya asked, knowing full well what the woman’s name was. “You said that throw was for me; I suggest you leave with the kind security guards heading our way now- lest I show you the damage proper aim can do. And trust me, I never miss a target.” 

Yep. He was hard. He was going to go to hell with an erection and a stupid grin on his face, and he didn’t even care. He pulled Lilya back and held her waist from behind, placing a kiss to her temple as he kept his eyes on Zara, the security doing their best not to manhandle the irate woman, knowing who she was. 

“I told you, Zara,” he began, curling his arms around her in a full embrace, “I’ve moved on. We’re over. You have no business with me, her or the company, so you must leave the premises. If you are seen here again, without express invitation from me or my family, I will press charges. Do you understand?” 

The woman stood still, her shoulders heaving up and down from her heavy breaths and glared at him. If he didn’t know better, it felt like he was being hexed by her stare alone. She didn’t answer him; instead, she pulled her arms free from the guards’ loose hold and walked out of the office, security following closely to ensure she was escorted from the building. 

Illario sighed deeply once Fletcher confirmed they had gone into the elevators, and the rest of the office returned to their business as normal, only a few people shooting him and the random woman curious glances as they continued working.  Lilya turned around and tenderly touched the reddened area around his eye socket, flinching empathetically when he did. She went to his EA’s desk and kindly asked if it was possible to get some ice and ibuprofen for him, and then led him into his own office. After surveying the layout, she determined that the couch was the best place for him to sit and gently helped him to it - not that he was unable to do so himself, but he found that he didn’t mind being led or cared for. It had been years since anyone who wasn’t Lucanis had looked out for him. 

...Had anyone apart from Lucanis ever looked out for him? 

He was lost in thought when a cold punch hit him in the face, and he exclaimed, shaken free from his downward spiral. 

“Oh, stop being such a baby, it’s only ice,” she soothed, a wry smile playing at her lips. Right. Those lips. Sinful, pouting, pliant - “So, I’m going to assume that was your ex? Clingy? Unable to understand that you’re broken up? Obsessive? She needed to see you with another woman to move on, so you used someone she didn’t know in the heat of the moment to get your point across, which just so happened to be me. Am I close?” 

“Yes, yes. You’re a genius and a good judge of character…” he grinned, grimacing for a second when his eye smarted. To her credit, she only smiled briefly at his pain and continued icing his injury. “Correct, Mr. Dellamorte, on all fronts,” she whispered, holding his gaze. “So that begs the question you should be asking…” “And what is that, Doc?” he chuckled, ignoring the pain in his cheek. It was easy to do so when he could easily smell the perfume that had long faded from his bedsheets, warming the air around him. 

“What does my impeccable judgement tell me about you?”  His smile faded. Hers grew. 

“I’m not going to like what you say next, am I?” he groaned playfully, taking over the icing duties, instantly mourning the loss of her touch. She sat back on the couch and laid her hands on top of each other on her lap, the woman he held in his arms retreating behind her professional facade once more. Suddenly, his attraction to her ability to smoothly switch to callousness dimmed when it was focused on him. 

“Probably not, no. I think now that… the debacle outside has played out… it is time I take those two minutes you promised me.” “Well, you’ve certainly earned them.” “Well done, me,” she retorted with a smile so sharp it could cut him in two. “You need to stop calling my office. My poor assistant, Bellara, has threatened to quit if she hears your voice on the other end of the phone one more time.” Illario raised his left hand in surrender. “Scouts honour, no more calls to your office.” 

“You’re meant to raise your right hand for that,” she clicked her tongue with faux disappointment, a shadow of the warm smile he could look at for hours playing across her mouth. 

“I’m injured, take pity,” he pouted, earning him an earnest laugh. She motioned for him to remove the ice pack, and she leaned in to inspect his face, so close he could just kiss her again, but she retreated as quickly as she came. 

“Hmm... shan't. For it is my expert opinion that you will, in fact, live. Congratulations, Mr. Dellamorte, you can continue being the best-dressed rake this side of town.” “Ouch. That one hurt, Doc. Isn’t your first rule to do no harm?” “Helping you take your ego down a peg or two is not doing harm. It’s a kindness to the rest of the world. I should get a medal,” she stated audaciously. “So now that we’ve confirmed that you are, in fact, not dying, and you’ve promised that you will no longer politely harangue my assistant, I shall bid you a good day. I leave with the sincere recommendation for you to please get examined by a doctor, especially if your symptoms get worse.” 

Illario cleared his throat, his grin already telling Lilya exactly what he was going to say next. 

“You’re a doctor. Please feel free to examine me once again, as thoroughly as needed. Doctor’s orders and all that.” 

She laughed again, her head thrown back like she hadn’t laughed in years. 

“You know what, sure. I could do that,” Lilya positioned herself between his legs and bent down until they were face to face, her hand supporting his chin, thumb unconsciously caressing his freshly shaved jaw. “Hmm, you’re right, you do need a follow-up. You should call my office and… oh wait… You can’t. What a shame. Good day, Mr. Dellamorte.” 

She tipped his chin back gently with a wide grin and sauntered off, completely aware that he was watching each step she took out of his office, and what she assumed was out of his life. But if there was one thing Illario Dellamorte knew, it was whether a deal would be worth the risk and effort it took to pursue, and Lilya de Riva was exactly the kind of risk he wanted to take.  

[willymontana]

[REVIEW FOR DEADPOOL & WOLVERINE, SPOILER ALERT FOR THE CAMEOS BUT NOT THE PLOT]

Okay, I wanna start this out by saying that I am NEITHER a professional movie critic NOR a huge movie geek NOR a comic book geek. I'm just someone with some thoughts about a movie I enjoyed recently and wish to share. My opinion doesn't reflect the general consensus and y'all can agree or disagree all you want, just be nice about it, please🥲

I've anticipated this movie for a long time as a casual Deadpool fan. When Disney acquired the rights to the character, I, like many, was worried that Mr. Bob was gonna try to family-friendly-ify Deadpool. There was also the fact that the quality of many Marvel projects since Endgame has gone downhill, which made me stop keeping up with them for a while. But Ryan Reynolds is passionate about Deadpool, he said it himself (I believe), and I quite enjoyed the first 2 movies despite not having seen them in a while. So I, with a couple of friends, walked into the cinema last Monday with a pretty high expectation. And oh boy did I come out feeling so goddamn high.

First of all, the CHARACTERS. The man of the hour, Deadpool, still has all of his charms. The jokes, narration, fourth-wall breaking, violence, dirty-ass innuendos, etc. are all very much still present. His growth from the previous movies carried on in this showing. Of course, he's still your good ol' merc with a mouth but now rather than acting out for selfish reasons, he always puts his found family and friends first, even if it means stop being Deadpool or losing them and never seeing them again (this growth might have been present already in Deadpool 2 but hey, like I've said, it's been a while). Another thing I'm utmost joyful about his characteristic this time around is that Deadpool is finally fruitier🤭. For those who don't know, Deadpool is canonically pansexual (don't believe me, look up the Deadpool/spiderman 2016 comic run, the girlies in dying of a new otp; you'll thank me later). And seeing such a big part of his character unapologetically being represented on a big screen is truly fulfilling. Ryan really pulled off one heck of a performance here and it really shows his passion and dedication for the character.

Next up is Wolverine. I've got to be honest with y'all: I wasn't a big Wolverine or X-men fan, not for any particular reason besides many fans and critics alike weren't too fond of the live-action movies. So I've passed out on the X-men franchise, even the highly-regarded Logan from 2017. This movie is actually my first introduction to Hugh Jackman as Wolverine and I must say, he REALLY did the damn thing. The gestures, his accent, the aggressiveness, they told me exactly who this character is. And I really was just blown away by Hugh's performance. I've only seen him through The Greatest Showman and some interviews, he seems like a pretty nice guy. So, to see him pull off the whole aggressive act and do it so well and flawlessly, I was speechless. I also love the redemption arc the writers gave to 'The Worst Wolverine'; it might not have been as epic as Logan from what I've heard, but it was solid.

The plot, what is there to say about it except EVERYTHING. Ryan Reynolds really gets the audience and also pop culture in general. I understand and hollered at most of the jokes and references. The soundtrack is absolutely FIRE. We have the mesmerizing BYE BYE BYE by NSYNC dance sequence at the beginning, the suit-up scene with GLAMOROUS by Fergie in the background, a road-trip montage with I'M WITH YOU by Avril Lavigne playing on the radio. Heck, there's also a lovey-dovey-stabby-bloody scene featuring YOU'RE THE ONE THAT I WANT from Grease for all the goldies out there. As a US-UK pop music enthusiast, I was like a kid in a candy store. And also, how can I forget about the EPIC battle near the end that used LIKE A PRAYER by Madonna?😩 All I have to say is 'fantastic, glorious, EXTRAORDINARY'. Ryan went through one hell of a journey just to get the license to the song and he sure did make the most out of it. I'm not kidding when I say that that montage is probably one of the best I've ever seen (I might be a little biased 'cause I love that song but the scene, overall, is truly incredible). And while we're on the topic of action and montages here, everything was beautifully filmed. The fighting sequences were such a treat to watch, nothing ever felt too busy to the point of not being able to focus on anything. Also, Ryan and the Mouse did not spare any expenses when it came to cameos. My gosh, like I've mentioned above, I was in the dark when it came to everything mutants-related, but even I was able to recognize a few familiar faces that fans online would go crazy over. And in addition, when Blake Lively came out as Ladypool, I literally lost my shit. She looked so good, her body was SNATCHED, like HELLO MOTHER???💅 But all these amazing cameos and jokes brought out what I considered the downside to the movie. I felt that the plot was outshined by them. To be clear, the plot was not bad but it wasn't that spectacular either. And when the credit started rolling, it was the thing I remembered the least.

Overall, I really enjoyed this movie. I had a great time at the cinema and laughed out loud with friends. Sure, there might be a few flaws, but the product, in general, is truly outstanding and worth checking out. I, your casual movie enjoyer, rate this movie 9/10❤️

[thearoaceshark]

Gosho Girls, Incorrect Quotes

(There are a couple of quotes that are AokoxAkako, I love them, I couldn't resist! But most of the quotes are platonic. Also, there is an appearance by Conan and Kogoro)

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Aoko: *sends an audio*

Ran: I'm busy now, do you mind if I listen to it later?

Aoko: take your time.

Ran, 20 minutes later: *plays the audio and the first thing she hears are screams and things falling*

Ran: *runs and calls Aoko*

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

*Ran has a cold (and she has no filter right now)*

Ayumi: Here you go, a bowl of delicious hot soup.

Ran: It's cold.

Sonoko: a bowl of delicious soup.

Ran: *test it* it tastes horrible.

Conan: a bowl of soup.

Ran: I think this isn't even soup.

Kogoro: a plate with food.

Ran: I doubt this is edible.

All: ...

Ran: and you didn't even serve it on a plate, this is a cooking pot.

Haibara: I told you it was better to call Aoko.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Akako: If I die, my funeral will be the biggest party ever and you're all invited.

Kazuha: "If"?

Haibara: Great, the only party I'm ever invited to and she might not even die.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sonoko: Sera, we didn't want to tell you, but in those clothes you look like a boy.

Sera: am I a cute boy?

Sonoko: the most handsome in all of Japan, you almost made me doubt!

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ran: I've only known Aoko-chan for 2 minutes, but if something happened to her I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Group chat names:

*Mean (Actually Good) Girls*

A chat for older girls, not Shiho/Haibara because they think she's a little girl.

Members: Sonoko (admin), Ran (mod), Akako (mod), Kazuha, Aoko, Sera.

*Menace dressed in pink*

A chat for all the girls, including Haibara and Ayumi. Swearing is not allowed in this chat.

Members: Ran (admin), Aoko (mod), Kazuha (mod), Haibara/Shiho, Ayumi, Sonoko, Sera, Akako.

*Super strong girls surrounded by nerdy boys*

A chat specifically to complain about the Gosho Boys and their antics.

Members: Aoko (admin), Akako (mod), Ran (mod), Kazuha (mod), Sonoko, Sera, Haibara/Shiho (added her because she insisted that she needed a place to complain about Conan).

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

*The Gosho Girls are cursed or a magical creature messes with them*

Automatically Akako: I think I'm going to break some rules of nature and put the world at risk on purpose.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ran: It's the sixth time this week I've had a breakdown and it's only Tuesday. Send help.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Aoko: I just want to tell you, AOKO HAS A BIG CRUSH IN YOU.

Akako, blushing: woh... And why are they here? *points to Ran, Sera and Sonoko, the last one had a sign that said "Let's go Aoko!" but behind it it said "Break her heart and you'll see Akako"

Aoko: I brought them as emotional support.

Ran: Kazuha couldn't come.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ayumi: some kids are bothering my friends and I at school...

Ran: well, listen Ayumi, violence is not–

Sonoko: humiliate them in front of everyone so they know that they shouldn't mess with you.

Ran: Sonoko no–

Sonoko: If you want, I'll help you. Let them know that you are officially adopted as part of the Suzuki family.

Ran: Sonoko stop!

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sera: hey Ran, I have a question.

Ran: yes?

Sera: can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it’s on?

Ran: Why do you ask?

Sera: ...

Ran: and where's Sonoko?

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Ayumi: You're overthinking this.

Haibara: You don't know the appropriate level of thinking, Ayumi. What if I'm underthinking?

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Akako: I have the bisexual right to be dramatic as hell.

Sonoko: and as your friend I also have the right to be damn dramatic.

Aoko, trying to flirt: and I can be the main character.

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

Sonoko: *gives an idea*

Sera, impressed: hey, there might be something there!

Ran: Yeah, a lawsuit.

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Kazuha: Now that I think about it, we've never been to Akako's house.

Aoko: that's right, I don't think anyone at school knows where she lives.

Ran: She avoids showing us where she lives. You know what that means.

Sonoko, nodding: she lives in a gothic castle.

Sera, nodding: she has a witchcraft shop to scam people.

Ayumi, nodding: she is rich.

Haibara, nodding: she is a mafia boss.

Aoko, joking: maybe she's a witch like Kaito says!

Kazuha:...

Ran: ...

Akako:...

Ran: no!...she's messy, her house is dirty, things like that! What is wrong with you?!

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Sonoko: I've done stupid things.

Akako, Ayumi and Kazuha: I saw those stupid things.

Sera and Haibara: I recorded those stupid things ("its for a school proyect").

Ran and Aoko: I TRY TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THOSE STUPID THINGS!

Sonoko: and I don't regret anything, I would do it again.

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Ayumi: I don't follow the rules.

Ayumi: I follow cute dogs and cats on social media.

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When Conan puts Sonoko to sleep to solve a case:

Ran: Amazing! Sonoko, your just like Sherlock Homeless!

Conan with Sonoko's voice: IT'S HOLMES!

Ran: *begins to suspect that there is something wrong here because that's how Shinichi always responded to that joke*

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Aoko: Where the devil is Akako?

Sera: Well, it is raining outside... Maybe she melted?

Haibara: Shall I look outside for a pointy hat?

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Shinichi arrives only to disappear shortly after, again.

Sonoko @ Ran: if your boyfriend doesn't change *hits her with a magazine* THEN CHANGE OF BOYFRIEND!!

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*The TV is freaking out*

Haibara: Don't worry, you have to treat an electronic like you treat a patient on life support *unplugs the TV, then plugs it back in again, without changes*

Haibara: Yeah, that didn't work with my sister either.

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Ran: What, I can't be in a bad mood? It's like people think, “Oh, Ran is such a nice person, Ran is so happy-go-lucky! “Ran can’t be in a bad mood!” Well, do you know what? Ran CAN be in a bad mood. And right now, Ran IS in a bad mood.

^^^ Let this girl take a brake^^^

°•○●□♤♡◇♧☆

@quite-a-character here are the Incorrect Quotes I hope you like them ♡