#like a roulette

[ytcomments-archive]

[freefallintothevoid]

Whenever Bruce can't do something as Batman he sends one of his kids in the cowl. Literally any of his kids. To deal with having to wear the cowl, they turn it into a game: will the justice league notice that Batman isn't the person under the mask?

Spoiler alert, they don't.

Somehow, the league never notices when it's not Bruce under the cowl, or at least that it's not the same person they all know.

Like never.

______

Hal: Hey Bats, you look taller today.

Jason, determined not to lose: hm

Hal, sensing danger and immediately backtracking: uh, that's not to say you don't usually look tall, I mean you just look taller today, um did you change your ear thingies?

Jason: *Batglare intensifies*

Hal: uh, I'm just gonna go

_______

Aquaman: you've been quiet this whole meeting, Batman, even for you.

Cass, currently wearing shoulder pads and absolutely insane platform boots: *a fim huff of breath*

Aquaman: right sorry, I forgot you were dealing with another mass break out from Arkham this week, you don't need to stay for the whole meeting. We know you probably know everything already anyway

Cass: *nods*

_____

Flash: Morning Batman. *zooms past*

Duke, absolutely befuddled:

Duke, quietly into his comm: you'd think the speedster would have the time to notice

The several batkids on the other side of the line: *laughing hysterically.*

Dick, wheezing: just do the thing where B tucks the lower half of his face into his cape like he's Dracula. You're doing great.

Bruce, from somewhere in the cave, actively giving up on the assumption that his coworkers have at least one working braincell between them: stop comparing me to Dracula, Dick

[oldmanpuppyplay]

Timestamp Roulette - Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008), Dir. Darren Lynn Bousman Req. by @dolltwink

[saltymarshmall0w]

Danny is "in denial" about the Waynes being vigilantes

Danny is really grateful for the Waynes taking him in and all but it’s just… it’s really obvious they’re vigilantes. Do they WANT him to find out? Why?? To join their battalion?

Hell nah. He’s already got enough going on trying to keep in check the many shades in the city.

Danny simply pretends to be oblivious about the Waynes being vigilantes. That's a future Danny problem.

It turns into Kyle levels of denial, where he ends up pretending he thinks the vigilantes are actors hired by the city to cover up all the ghosts haunting Gotham.

And obviously, the city bases them on the infamously growing Wayne family. It's so sweet of the Waynes to volunteer to dress up as their character for public appearances.

Meanwhile, Bruce has banned outright telling Danny even though it's been nearly a year of him living with them. So what if Danny glows sometimes and has full conversations with invisible people in dark alleyways, everyone has their quirks! so, the Batkids have resolved to just "accidentally" leave their mask on after patrol or make tactical plans loudly about taking down Penguin's latest scheme with Danny a room over.

-

“Is Dick coming to the Gala?” Danny asked as his head swiveled between his phone and the mirror as he attempted to tie his own tie. How did his mom always make it look so easy?

“No, he is going out as Batman tonight, since Father is unable to.” Damian responded. He may as well be blasé about their identities, seeing as Fenton was obviously both completely aware of their identities and completely in denial.

“Oh, man. Does that mean one of the “rouges” are going to attack the gala?” Danny asked, “It’s probably going to be that Two-face guy, huh? He hasn’t made an appearance in a while and his character arc with “Brucie” hasn’t made any progress in a while.”

“Nonsense, there is no predicting the mindset of a criminal like Two-face.” Damian ignored Danny’s disbelieving scoff as he maneuvered his newest brother to face him so he could take over the task for him, else they would be standing there all night. “Besides, Drake is in charge of security for the gala and will do an adequate job securing the venue. If you are afraid remain by my side where I can protect you.”

Damian tightened the tie around Danny's neck and stepped back to let Fenton pull his own collar down.

"That's very sweet of you, Dami." Danny reached up a hand and mussed up Damian's newly-gelled hair, garnering a growl and a shove from the boy. "But you should do normal kid things during the gala, like accidentally saying rude things to old ladies, or complaining about how bored you are, and don't forget to prank all the evil billionaires."

...

The “I told you so.” Danny brazenly mouthed to Damian later in the evening from where Two-face held a gun to his head was as infuriating as it was distressing.

—

(Kyle Weston is the fanon brother of Wes Weston (also a fanon character) who’s whole thing is that he believes in conspiracy theories like Wes, but doesn’t believe in ghosts at all to Wes’s frustration.)

[spark-circuit]

okay listen. i know there's already one video about The Fucking Creep out there. but i NEED to share one of my favourite Creep Moments.

[l3v5ha]

#SEVERANCE: i'm a major general on the seth milchick front lines 💔

[xiewho]

complaining about high elves and sharing inside job gossip. the sisters ever actually

[satansleftnutcheek]

Bitches will create the MOST DEVASTATING STORIES KNOWN TO MAN out of 2 besties playing Minecraft together what the FUCK did they put in the water why are people making work about GoodTimesWithScar and Grian as if they’re Penelope and Odysseus the boys really saw a silly comedy and said no not sad enough we MUST fix this

[tf2-daily-doctor]

Emesis blue medic por favor?

Day #4

[2009amazingphil]

this is actually hysterical why are they an old married couple still bickering about the same thing a decade later

[octavianacidicbreastmilk]

a point worth making when talking about the decrease of sexually explicit movies is that its happening simultaneously with an increase of intimacy coordinators and stronger awareness wrt making actors comfortable performing them. and potentially contractual power to refuse to do them without shooting your career in the foot

like yes, sure a lot of ppl watching are uncomfortable with sex scenes in many ways tumblr routinely dunks on, but also like lmao exploitation of young women who had to make rent-money and could be coerced into nudity/sex scenes they werent comfortable with was an issue in the industry for the longest time (and still is)

[mischievous-thunder]

Also Logan, a few hours later:

Ah yes, the love language of the two immortal psychotic freaks

[ohitslen]

Kiss gun!

Based on this tweet!

[smoresie]

This was made by the official publisher of buckshot roulette

no I am not kidding

take it as you will

[starscream-is-my-wife]

In 1895, Optimus Prime invented female transformers to appease angry feminists

(From the 1889 marvel uk comic called “prime’s rib”)

My fun little hc is that all of the femmes are trans, like they probably didn’t even have feminine pronouns in cybertronian before earth, these bots are older then gender itself

[jaybehindtheslaughter]

Also still wip

Yeah.