#like NO that's not what they mean or intend

[goldsainz]

# F1 GRID — OOPS, WRONG PERSON !

MASTERLIST !

REQUEST !

001. SUMMARY !

✯ you decide to pull a prank by “butt-dialing” your boyfriend.

002. WARNINGS !

✯ tiny tiniest bit of angst, barely proofread.

003. NOTE !

✯ i loveddd this request, so much fun to write! hope you all enjoy it because i don’t know if it’s quite as good as i intended. also, this is LONGGG so please let me know if you liked it 🫶

word count : 5,6k

★ CARLOS SAINZ

Carlos is genuinely surprised when he sees your name pop up on his phone, a facetime call incoming. Still, he doesn’t hesitate in answering. Whatever it is you might have to say must be important given the fact that you usually avoid making calls. Texts or face-to-face conversation being more your style.

What he doesn’t know, is you’re trying to keep your giggles to yourself. You have your back-up phone in hand, recording a TikTok trend you saw and decided to attempt with your boyfriend.

When Carlos answers, you pull yourself together and start speaking as if you were in the middle of a conversation. You wonder if the wall can see the idiocy of what you’re doing, if it’s judging you as you sit alone in your room whilst pranking your boyfriend.

“Amor?” Carlos asks, greeting you still slightly confused as to the reason for your call. You grin at his voice, your camera pointing to the ceiling so it seems like an accident.

“Honestly, I think I would tell him no,” you say to nobody in particular, making up a conversation.

“Hello? What’s going on?” He asks again, but you pay him no mind.

You continue your prank as best as you can, “I don’t know… I don’t think I’m ready for that kind of commitment,”

Carlos doesn’t respond instantly, but he gets the feeling that you’ve accidentally called him. He doesn’t hung up, no, he’s too nosy to do that. So, he keeps quiet in hopes that you continue whatever conversation you’re having.

“Do you think he would be mad?” You ask to your wall, “He’s really sweet, but that would anger anyone.”

What? He asks in his mind, trying to fill in the blanks to your conversation. Are you talking about him?

“He asked me the other day if I liked silver or gold better, isn’t that a sign?”

Oh, you so are talking about him.

When the realisation hits, he’s kind of sad. He didn’t ask it with the intentions you are insinuating, but you would really say no if he asked you to marry him? He can’t help but have his feelings hurt.

“I just don’t want to rush things.”

The silence on the other end of the phone is deafening. You would think he hung up if you weren’t so intently watching the screen on your phone. You feel slightly bad about the kind of conversation you’re having. A fake conversation, but still, you feel bad.

Deciding he’s had enough, Carlos hungs up. He won’t listen in on your conversation any longer, it’s doing him no good. He’s left with a bitter taste in his mouth, a weight crushing onto his chest as he ponder over your words. He didn’t know you felt that way, and truthfully, he could’ve gone on for longer without knowing.

Immediately, you call him back. He’s tempted to ignore the call but twice can’t be a coincidence.

“What?” He asks quickly after answering, when he sees your face his harsh frown softens but his tone doesn’t.

“I’m sorry,” you say, dragging the y, “It was a prank, mi vida.”

He freezes for a second and then lets out a sigh of relief, “It was?”

“Yes!” You exclaim, showing him your second phone, “Say hello to TikTok.”

“You scared me,” he says with a shake of his head, “I thought you were being serious.”

“Never,” you firmly respond, “Can’t wait to be Mrs. Sainz,”

He smiles at the sudden shyness of your voice, “Well, that’s a relief then,”

You laugh at his words then suddenly stop, “Wait, Carlos, what do you mean?”

He looks at you as best as he can through a camera lens, then laughs and blows you a kiss.

“Carlos! What do you mean?” You ask more desperately, searching for answers but he just laughs and says his goodbyes.

You are left with your mouth agape when he hangs up. The video is certainly funny, and you can’t wait to edit out the more intimate ending and post it. But you’re left with a nervous yet exciting feeling at the pit of your stomach.

Perhaps the prankster ended up being the one pranked. Though you hope it’s not a prank.

★ CHARLES LECLERC

You await Charles’ response to your facetime call, patiently sitting down on your bed and your other phone in hand, ready to record. 

When your incoming call appears on Charles’s screen, he instantly answers. He loves to hear from you, especially when he’s away from you and misses you deeply. 

“Hello, mon chou,” he says, smiling at the camera and then slightly frowning when he notices that your camera is completely black.

“Okay, so I’ll see you at seven, right?” You ask your bear plushie, smiling at the ridiculousness of the prank.

At your words Charles’ mood dips, trying to understand what you;re saying or better yet, who you're speaking to.

“I’m so excited to see you,” Maybe it's cruel to play such games when you're thousands of kilometres apart. 

You know how much Charles misses you, how gruelling being so far away from home is to him. It is to you as well, being separated from your boyfriend tears your heart apart each time, but you decide that maybe spicing things up a little could be just what you need.

"Wait, who are you talking to? Is someone else there?” He asks, fidgeting with his hair and straightening up from where he was sitting. 

You pretend to ignore his voice and continue with the prank, “Yeah, he’s in Canada right now.”

Your boyfriend is now agitated at your words, though he prides himself for his calmness in tense situations he's not sure how to act right now. Should he hang up? Shout so that you perhaps hear him? Or stick around for the call and understand who you're talking to?

“No no, don't even worry about him,” you have to stifle your giggles, looking at the plushy in front of you who has served as your faithful company while Charles is away.

He leans in closer to the camera, tilting his head slightly, trying to understand what’s going on. “Amour, who’s there with you? Is someone else there?” he asks, a little louder this time, but still in that soft, slightly panicked tone.

It takes everything in you not to break character, but you want to see how far you can go. And hey, if you can pull this off maybe an acting career is not so far away. 

“Honestly, it gets so boring around here but you make it better.”

Charles’ lips part as if he’s about to say something, but he hesitates. You can see him wrestling with his emotions. He doesn’t want to jump to conclusions, but the confusion and a bit of hurt are written all over his face. He glances away from the screen, clearly feeling awkward. “I mean... if you’re busy, I can call you later?” His voice is soft, polite as always, but there’s a hint of insecurity creeping in.

Finally, you can’t keep up the act anymore, and burst into laughter.

His eyes widen in realisation, and his face immediately softens with relief. “Wait, is this a joke?!” His hand goes to his chest, and he lets out a nervous laugh. “Mon dieu, I thought you were serious for a second! I was so confused.” He laughs now, more freely, shaking his head.

You grab your phone, fixing the angle so he can finally see you and just how alone you are in your room. “Yeah, it was just a prank. You should’ve seen your face!”

The giggles you're letting out make Charles smile, finding it endearing how such a simple thing entertained you. 

He groans playfully, clearly relieved but also slightly embarrassed. “You really got me... I didn’t know what to think! I was about to ask if I needed to fly out and speak with you!” He chuckles, running a hand through his hair again, his smile back and wider than ever. “But honestly, don’t do that again, chérie. I was about to lose my mind!”

You laugh, wiping a tear from your eye. “I’m sorry, I just couldn’t resist! You were so confused, it was hilarious!”

He shakes his head with a grin, still amused, but now there’s a more serious note in his eyes. He leans a little closer to the camera, his voice softening. “I’m glad it was a joke, but you had me really worried for a second there. I didn’t know what I would’ve done if it was real...” He trails off, his expression turning thoughtful, like he’s truly imagining what it would feel like if you were talking to someone else.

You smile, feeling a bit guilty for messing with him. “I would never do that to you, Charles. It was just a prank.”

He breathes out a little sigh, then flashes you a tender smile that could melt anyone’s heart. “I know, I know. I trust you... but still, you’re so important to me.” His voice drops to a softer tone, his vulnerability shining through. “You don’t know how much I care about you. When I thought you might be talking to someone else... I don’t think I could’ve handled it.”

His sincerity catches you off guard, and your heart swells. Before you can say anything, he smiles again, a little sheepish now. “But anyway, good prank. I’ll give you that.” He points a playful finger at the screen. “Just remember, payback’s coming!” His grin is wide, but there’s a mischievous glint in his eyes.

You raise an eyebrow, pretending to be unbothered. “Oh really? What are you going to do?”

Charles smirks, leaning back in his chair. “You’ll see. You’ll never know when it’s coming, but when it does, you’re going to regret pranking me!” He winks, but it’s clear he’s more than happy to let this prank slide for now.

Then, his voice softens again, and he gives you a look that’s pure affection. “But seriously... don’t scare me like that again. I like knowing I’m the only one you’re FaceTiming.” He smiles, his dimples showing, his face a mix of relief and playful charm.

You can’t help but laugh. “Okay, okay! I promise, no more pranks like that.”

“Good,” he says with a final grin, looking like he’s truly at ease again. Then, he blows you a quick kiss through the screen. “Now, tell me what you were actually doing before you called me. I’ve been thinking about you all day.”

★ LANDO NORRIS

It’s late afternoon, and you’re feeling mischievous. You decide to pull a prank you saw earlier on TikTok on Lando. You know he will be caught off guard, and that’s exactly what you’re going for.

You set your phone on the couch, deliberately calling Lando without actually answering the FaceTime. Then, in a casual voice, you start the prank, pretending to have a conversation with someone else.

“Yeah, it was so fun hanging out last night. You’re hilarious!” you say, just loud enough for Lando to hear through the FaceTime call. “I can’t believe we stayed up talking for so long!”

On the other end of the line, Lando picks up immediately. Your contact name makes him smile, wondering what you’re about tell him. But when the call goes through, he’s confused, staring at your screen which faces the ceiling. “Wait… babe? Hello?” he says, glancing around as if trying to figure out what’s happening. He leans in, his brows furrowing when he hears you talking, but not to him.

“Yeah, it was so fun hanging out last night. You’re hilarious!” you say, just loud enough for Lando to hear through the FaceTime call. “I can’t believe we stayed up talking for so long!”

His eyes go wide as he looks closer at the phone, confusion spreading across his face. He shifts in his chair, trying to process what he’s hearing. “What? What’s going on? Who are you talking to?” he asks, his voice growing more anxious.

You continue the conversation, making it sound even more flirty. “Yeah, I didn’t expect to have that much fun either. You’re really something else.”

Lando's heart rate definitely spikes. He leans forward, the panic starting to creep into his voice. “Wait, wait, who’s there? Who’s she talking to?” He mutters to himself, wondering why the hell you can't hear his panicked voice but what he's more worried about is who you're talking to. 

“I’ll text you later, okay? Maybe we can hang out again soon?” you say, keeping your tone light and playful. “Yeah, it was really great seeing you. I’ll talk to you later!”

By now, Lando’s freaking out. He’s still staring at the phone screen, but you can see the uncertainty and jealousy building. He runs a hand through his hair, letting out a nervous laugh. “Okay, this can’t be real. Am I being punked or something? Who the hell are you talking to?” He leans in closer, almost yelling now. “Babe! Hello! Can you hear me?!”

You pretend not to hear him and keep talking to the imaginary guy. “Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow. Can’t wait.”

He finally breaks, face twisting into disbelief, and he throws his hands in the air. “Are you serious right now? Who the hell is this guy?!” His voice cracks, and he’s clearly spiralling at this point. “Babe! BABE! Who are you talking to?! Are you with someone else?!” He’s practically on the edge of his seat, completely panicking.

You can’t hold back anymore and burst out laughing, picking up the phone.

Lando’s eyes are wild as he sees you finally holding the phone properly. “Wait… what? What’s going on? Who are you—” He stops mid-sentence as he realises you’re laughing, and it slowly dawns on him. “Oh my god.” He slumps back in his chair, groaning dramatically. “Noooo, don’t tell me this was a prank!”

Still laughing, you nod. “Yep! You got butt-dialed, babe.”

His face is still frozen in disbelief. “Are you joking right now?” he asks, his voice going up an octave. His hand is over his chest like he’s trying to calm his racing heart. “You seriously just made me think you were talking to another guy?”

“Uh-huh,” you reply, barely holding back more laughter.

He leans closer to the screen, his eyes wide. “I’m literally sweating! My heart was in my throat, and you were over here just… casually chatting with some ‘guy.’” His voice cracks a little as he says “guy,” and his dramatic reaction makes you laugh harder.

“Oh, come on, it was just a little prank,” you tease.

Lando shakes his head, looking somewhere between amused and exasperated. “Little prank? I was literally about to start a fight with the air! I’ve never been so confused in my life!” He lets out a long, dramatic sigh, slumping back in his chair. “I’m in shambles right now. I’ve been emotionally attacked.”

You try to stop giggling, but his over-the-top reaction just keeps it going. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to give you a heart attack!”

“Too late,” he says with mock seriousness. “The damage is done. I might need to lie down after this.” He pauses, staring at you with narrowed eyes, a small smirk forming on his lips. “You owe me big time.”

You roll your eyes, still smiling. “Oh, really? And what exactly do I owe you?”

Lando crosses his arms, feigning deep thought. “Well, first off, you owe me a massive apology. And then maybe…” His eyes light up as the thought hits him. “You can take me out for a nice dinner, pay for dessert, and— oh! I’m thinking a full day of pampering.”

You laugh, raising an eyebrow. “Pampering? What do you think this is, a spa?”

He grins, leaning back in his chair and looking more relaxed now. “Hey, I deserve it after what you just put me through. I was about to show up at your place ready to fight some random guy I didn’t even know existed!”

“Alright, alright,” you say, playfully rolling your eyes again. “I’ll pamper you. But just this once!”

Lando’s grin grows wider. “Deal. But I’m definitely getting you back for this, by the way. Just so you know.”

You can’t help but laugh at his scheming. “I’d expect nothing less from you.”

He tilts his head, his eyes softening slightly. “But seriously, don’t scare me like that again, okay? My poor heart can’t take it.” His voice drops into a teasing whine, but there’s a touch of genuine relief there too.

You smile, feeling a little guilty now. “I promise, no more butt-dial pranks.”

Lando sighs in mock relief, then grins. “Good. Now that we’ve got that settled, I’m expecting that pampering session to start soon. I’m thinking back rubs and snacks. Lots of snacks.”

You shake your head with a laugh. “You’re impossible.”

“You love it,” he says cheekily, winking at you.

★ LEWIS HAMILTON

It’s late in the evening, you’re lounging on the couch, scrolling through social media when a mischievous idea pops into your head: prank Lewis. It’s been a long week for him, and you know he’s probably relaxing after a day full of meetings and training. That makes it the perfect time to catch him off guard.

Picking up your phone, you set it on the couch beside you, face down, so it looks like a genuine mistake. Then, with one quick swipe, you FaceTime him. The phone rings a few times before Lewis picks up. You can see from the tiny preview screen that he’s in the hotel, leaning back in his chair, probably unwinding after the busy day he's had.

At first, he looks confused when he sees the camera pointing at your ceiling. “Babe?” he calls out, his voice soft and curious. “Did you call me?”

You ignore his soft voice, pretending you don’t realise you’ve called him. Instead, you start the staged conversation with your "friend” who really just is an unbothered Roscoe, who's resting by your feet and not paying much attention to anything.

“I don’t know, I just feel like things with Lewis aren’t working anymore,” you say with a sigh, making your voice sound hesitant, like you’re deep in thought.

On the other end, you can hear Lewis pause, his confusion evident as he watches the ceiling of your living room on the screen. “Wait, what? Did I just hear that right?” he mumbles, his voice soft but tinged with concern.

You continue, not responding to him, staying in character, “It’s just been really hard lately. Like, I know he cares about me, but it feels like we’re growing apart, you know?” You make your voice sound vulnerable, as if you’re spilling your deepest thoughts to this imaginary friend.

Lewis sits up straighter, his face showing a mix of confusion and worry now. He leans toward the screen, trying to get your attention. “Babe? What’s going on? Who are you talking to?” His voice is still calm, but there’s a note of urgency creeping in.

You keep the fake conversation going, pushing it a little further. “I mean, I love him, but sometimes love isn’t enough. We’re just in different places, and I don’t know if we’re going to make it.”

Your boyfriend’s eyes widen and he rubs a hand over his face, his composure starting to slip as the weight of your words sinks in. “Wait, hold on, what are you talking about? You don’t think we’re gonna make it? Babe, what’s happening?” His voice is louder now, more strained, and you can see the confusion and hurt beginning to cloud his expression.

You almost put a stop to your prank right there, but you decide to push through. So, you ignore him, still talking to your imaginary friend, “I’ve been thinking about ending things for a while, but it’s just so hard. He’s so sweet, and I don’t want to hurt him, but I can’t keep pretending everything’s fine.”

Lewis blinks, and you can see him processing your words, his heart clearly sinking. His mouth opens slightly, but he’s struggling to find the right thing to say. “No, no, this can’t be real,” he whispers to himself, shaking his head. 

You glance at the screen briefly, seeing the growing panic in his eyes, but you push the prank a bit further. “Yeah, I’m going to talk to him soon. I just hope he understands.” You add a small, fake sigh. “I don’t want to hurt him, but I don’t think we’re right for each other anymore.”

He lets out a shaky breath, his calm exterior cracking even more. “Babe, talk to me. What’s going on? Is this how you really feel?” He’s practically pleading now, his voice full of emotion. You can see the vulnerability in his eyes as he tries to make sense of everything.

Finally, unable to hold it together any longer, you burst out laughing and grab the phone. “Oh my god, Lewis, it’s a prank!”

For a moment, Lewis just stares at you, blinking in complete disbelief. Then, slowly, realisation dawns, and he lets out a long, exasperated sigh, slumping back in his chair. “No way… are you serious? You were just messing with me?”

You nod, still laughing. “Yeah, there’s no friend. I wasn’t talking about breaking up with you. I’m so sorry, my love!”

He rubs his face with both hands, trying to process everything. “Wow… okay, you really got me.” He exhales sharply, clearly relieved but still a bit shaken. “I thought I was about to lose you here. My heart was racing.”

“I’m sorry!” you say, giggling. “I didn’t mean to freak you out that much, I swear.”

He chuckles softly, though you can see the relief still lingering on his face. “You really had me going, babe. I didn’t know what to think.” He pauses, then looks at you with a mix of amusement and reproach. “I was ready to drop everything and come find you.”

You grin, feeling a little bad now that you can see how worried he really was. “I didn’t mean to push it that far! It was just supposed to be a little prank.”

Lewis shakes his head with a smile, the tension starting to fade. “Alright, alright. It’s all good. You got me. But don’t think I’m letting you off the hook so easily.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Oh? What’s my punishment?”

He leans back, crossing his arms with a playful smirk. “I’m not sure yet, but I’m definitely getting you back for this. And trust me, when I do, you’ll never see it coming.” His eyes glint with mischief, though there’s still that hint of vulnerability lingering in his expression.

You laugh, still feeling a bit guilty for putting him through that emotional rollercoaster. “Fair enough, I’ll be ready for whatever you’ve got planned.”

He chuckles, his smile softening. “Just… no more pranks like that, alright? You really freaked me out.” His voice lowers, and you can tell he means it.

You nod, giving him an apologetic smile. “I promise, no more fake breakups.”

Lewis grins, though his eyes are still warm with lingering emotion. “Good. Because if we’re going to have a serious conversation, I’d rather it be in person.” He winks, his usual calm confidence starting to return.

“Deal,” you say with a playful roll of your eyes, relieved that he’s taking it so well.

He sighs dramatically, then chuckles. “You’re lucky I love you, babe. Because if anyone else tried that on me…” He trails off with a smirk, but you know he means it.

“I know, I know. You’re the best,” you tease, still smiling.

“Yeah, don’t forget it,” he says, his voice light, but you can tell he’s glad the whole thing was just a joke.

★ MAX VERSTAPPEN

Max’s phone buzzes with a FaceTime call, and he glances at the screen, seeing your name pop up. It’s unusual for you to call directly; you typically prefer texting or face-to-face conversations. So, he’s immediately curious about what might be urgent enough to warrant a call.

You place your phone face down on the couch and dial Max’s number. The phone rings a few times before he picks up, his face appearing on the screen. He’s clearly winding down after a long day, his hair slightly tousled and a relaxed look on his face.

“Hey, what’s up?” he asks casually. You can see he’s expecting a normal call.

Instead of responding, you start chatting as if you’re talking to someone else. “Yeah, it was great seeing you tonight. I didn’t expect to have such a good time.” You add a flirty tone to your voice, trying to sound casual.

At first, Max stays silent, his expression shifting from relaxed to puzzled. After a moment, his eyes narrow, and he leans closer to the screen. “Who are you talking to?” His voice is direct, with a calm demeanour that contrasts the intensity in his eyes.

You continue with the prank, keeping up the pretence. “I know, right? It’s been so long since we’ve had a chance to hang out like this.” You give a small, playful laugh.

Max’s face tightens slightly, and he sits up straight, clearly not pleased. “Seriously, who is that? Who are you talking to?” His tone is calm but authoritative.

“I’m glad we could hang out,” you say softly, using the same voice you use when you want to sweeten Max. It’s a tone reserved only for him, and that only makes him more frustrated.

He watches you intently, his patience wearing thin. “I’m not playing games. Are you going to tell me who this is or not?” 

You can see his frustration building as he waits for a response. When you don’t immediately answer, he makes a decisive move. “You know what? I’m ending this call.” He starts to hang up, but then pauses, his eyes narrowing even more. “Actually, I’m coming over. I want to see who you’re talking to.”

Before you can react, he’s already starting to disconnect. Realising the prank might be escalating, you quickly grab the phone and try to calm him down. “Wait, Max, it’s a joke! I was just messing with you!”

Max freezes mid-disconnect, his eyes widening with a mix of relief and disbelief. He straightens up, a sarcastic grin spreading across his face. “Oh, a joke? Perfect timing. I was just about to come over and give your ‘mystery guy’ a piece of my mind. You know, because clearly, he needed a crash course on what it means to mess with my girlfriend.”

You burst out laughing, trying to explain yourself. “I’m really sorry, Max. I didn’t think it would get this intense.”

He rolls his eyes dramatically, still grinning. “Yeah, because nothing says ‘I’m just kidding’ like a full-blown emotional crisis. I’m sure your ‘mystery guy’ would’ve been thrilled to meet the real Max Verstappen, all dressed up for a confrontation.”

You giggle, feeling a bit sheepish. “I didn’t mean for it to go that far. I just thought it would be a harmless prank.”

Max raises an eyebrow, his sarcasm in full swing. “Oh, of course, harmless. I mean, who needs peace of mind when you’ve got surprise pranks, right?”

You laugh, trying to diffuse the situation. “Okay, okay, I get it. I’ll make sure to keep my pranks a bit less intense next time.”

He smirks, shaking his head. “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. Unless you want me to come over and give you a live demonstration of what happens when you prank a racing driver. Spoiler alert: It involves a lot of very fast revenge.”

“Noted,” you say with a grin. “I promise, no more surprise drama.”

Max chuckles, his sarcasm giving way to genuine amusement. “Good. Because I was about to start practising my ‘disappointed boyfriend’ speech. And trust me, it’s a work of art.”

You laugh again, feeling relieved that he’s taking it well. “I’ll avoid any more pranks that might warrant a speech.”

“Perfect. Now, let’s talk about something less dramatic— like how you’re going to make it up to me. And I don’t mean another prank.”

You laugh, ready to move on from the prank. “I’ve got just the thing. No more surprises, I promise.”

He chuckles, shaking his head. “Good. And remember, I’m always keeping an eye out for any more ‘mysterious’ calls.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” you say with a laugh. 

★ OSCAR PIASTRI

You’re feeling cheeky and decide to pull a prank on your boyfriend by pretending to butt dial him. You carefully set up your phone, ensuring it calls Oscar automatically. You place the phone on a table and begin your act, speaking loudly enough for him to hear clearly through the call. 

You make sure to put on a show, talking loudly enough that Oscar will definitely hear it. As soon as he picks up, you begin your “conversation.”

“Oh hey! So glad you called,” you start, making your voice bright and cheerful as if you’ve been waiting for this call. “I just have to tell you, last night was absolutely amazing!”

Oscar, on the other end of the call, answers with his usual calm demeanour. He sees your name on the screen and answers with a mix of curiosity and amusement. His face remains composed, but you can sense him starting to analyse the situation. He listens intently, trying to figure out what’s happening.

“I’m so glad we got to hang out. It’s not every day you meet someone who can keep me laughing like that,” you say, your tone warm and engaging. You emphasise the casual nature of the conversation, hoping to make your boyfriend think it’s a genuine chat.

Oscar’s gaze is fixed on the screen, his eyes narrowing slightly as he listens. He remains eerily quiet, giving you the sense that he’s deep in thought, piecing together the details of your conversation. His face is a mask of calm curiosity, but there’s a flicker of recognition in his eyes.

“Absolutely, we need to do it again soon. How about dinner tomorrow? I’ll text you the details,” you continue, maintaining the pretence. You keep your tone light and breezy, almost as if the conversation is too engaging for you to notice his reaction.

Oscar’s smirk starts to form, his mind piecing together the clues. He leans back slightly in his chair, his composure unshaken. He’s clearly caught on to the prank, but he maintains his cool, waiting for the right moment to reveal his awareness.

“I hope you’re done with your other conversation,” he finally says, his voice smooth and collected. “We can talk later when you’re free from your… other commitments.” His calm tone and subtle smirk indicate he’s caught on, but he’s letting you have your fun for now.

You immediatly start laughing, realising that Oscar has seen right through your prank. “I didn’t expect you to catch on so quickly!”

He chuckles, clearly enjoying the reveal. “I had a feeling something was off, your conversation was a bit too perfect.” He gives you a playful wink. “Nice try, though. I have to admit, you had me intrigued for a moment there.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” you say, still grinning. “I was hoping to give you a little challenge.”

He leans back in his chair, his smile broadening. “Challenge accepted. You managed to get a rise out of me, which is no easy feat. But now that I’m in on the joke, I’m planning my own comeback.” His tone is light-hearted but filled with a hint of mischief.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” you say, still grinning. “I was hoping to give you a little challenge.”

His smirk widens into a charming grin. “Challenge accepted,” he replies, his eyes twinkling with playful mischief. “But since you managed to prank me, I think it’s only fair that I get to return the favour.”

You raise an eyebrow, intrigued by his confident tone. “Oh, really? And what do you have in mind for your comeback?”

Oscar leans in a bit closer, his gaze softening. “Let’s just say that next time we talk, I might have a surprise of my own for you. Something that’ll make your heart race in a way that’s far more thrilling than any prank.” He gives you a knowing look, his voice lowering to a teasing whisper. “I’m all about keeping things exciting.”

Your heart flutters at the flirtatious undertone in his voice. “Is that so? I’ll have to be extra vigilant then. I wouldn’t want you to catch me off guard again.”

His eyes sparkle with affection. “Oh, don’t worry. I love a good challenge, especially when it means I get to see that beautiful smile of yours when you’re surprised.” 

You blush a little at his words, “I might have to prank you every day if I get you this sweet after.”

“I’m alway sweet,” he teases, laughing at your flusteredness.

“Yeah, you are.”

“Anyway, are you getting home later today?” You ask, hoping to see your boyfriend after weeks of him being away.

“Yes, I’m aching to see you,” he confesses, smiling at you.

“Me too.” 

“See you then, my little prankster,” Oscar says with a laugh.

You roll your eyes at the nickname but you’re endeared by it all the same. “See you soon.”

[yanf4iry]

oh, my dear wife ♡

wc 2.1k

husband! alhaitham x afab! reader

modern! au. breast play. fingering. oral (fem). overuse of the words ‘my wife’ but he’s in awe. probably overuse of ‘love’ and ‘darling’ too. lovey dovey alhaitham. ‘love making.’ still slightly teasing alhaitham. subtle breeding kink. afab autonomy. unprotected sex (pls be safe!). pls lmk if anythimg has been missed.

there could be spelling/gramma so pls lmk if there’s anything to be fixed mwah <333

"my darling," alhaitham spoke gently, coming up behind you, his hands lovingly capsuling around your waist as his chin came down to rest upon your shoulder. "i was thinking of ordering a fish curry and a bottle of wine to our room tonight, rather than going down to the restaurant to eat," he continued, expressing his thoughts to you. "just wanna spend the night alone together."

he nuzzled further against your neck, humming softly in contentment as the feeling of your soft skin brushed against his flushed cheeks. "how does that sound?" he asked, turning you around so you were facing him, "i thought it'd be perfect for our first night together as a married couple."

alhaitham gazed down at you lovingly, the smile on his face unmoveable as he mentioned the fact that you were husband and wife. he proposed to you just over a year ago and ever since he's been beyond eager to finally arrive at the day he can officially call you his wife.

"sounds perfect.." you hum back, enjoying the touch of his warm and firm hands against the curve of your waist.

alhaitham pulled away from you softly, going over to the small desk towards the front door of the extremely fancy hotel room you were staying in for the next 10 days. "so what are you thinking, love?" he asks "red or white?" he continues, referring to the wine he previously spoke about ordering.

"red."

"you read my mind," he grins happily before dialing the restaurant downstairs and requesting room service.

the night eventually started to pass, and you found yourselves curled up on the sofa; you snuggled against his chest and his arm trailed over your shoulder, slowly getting through that bottle of red wine he had ordered just over an hour ago.

you catch him gazing down at you, a look you could only recognise as awe and admiration. "what?" you giggle, a light blush covering your face as your eyes intertwine in an intense gaze.

"you're gorgeous.." alhaitham mumbled, his gaze not budging from your face. "perfect, even," he continued, rubbing his slender hands against the skin of your upper arm.

"i've never been so thankful to have someone in my life, let alone have the same person as my wife; who i intend to spend forever and always with.."

his words struck a chord in your heart, reddening your cheeks. "getting flustered, are we?" alhaitham chuckled, a little smirk on his face, "well get used to it.." he leans down and whispered in your ear, his hot breath causing a shiver to erupt down your spine "you've got a lifetime of compliments just like it."

after a couple moments of silence, his fingers slowly started to edge towards the hem of your shirt, dipping under it slightly to let his fingertips softly caress the skin of your lower stomach. a small sigh left your lips at the feeling, enjoying the gentle and loving touches he often grazed on your skin.

alhaitham cleared his throat, his hand moving up a little, inching ever so closer to your waist. "you know.. umm.." he started up, amusement laced in his voice, "there's still one honeymoon tradition we've not gotten around to doing yet," he continued, a smirk tugging on his lips; even though you couldn't see it, you knew it was there.

"and what would that be?"

he replied with a small tut, shaking his head playfully. "oh.. don't make me say it," he spoke up "you know what i mean."

"and what would you like me to do about it?" you ask, turning your head a little so your gaze was now meeting his.

"let me take you to bed," alhaitham spoke without hesitation, that same look of admiration he had on his face "if you'd be so kind.."

and with that, you found yourself laid out on the bed you shared, his tall, slim body hovering over yours. he leaned down, capturing your lips in a soft, yet passionate kiss; full of need and desire, but most importantly, love.

his hands found their way back to the hem of your shirt, fiddling with it slightly, slowly growing more impatient by the second. alhaitham was always, more often than not, gentle in bed but this felt different; not saying he ever lacked passion, but this felt beyond passionate, beyond loving. it was almost as if he craved to be close to you like his entire being needed it.

"may i take it off?" alhaitham asked gently, tugging at your shirt a little, pulling away from your lips so he could look into your eyes; trying to look for any hint of uncertainty or discomfort, and thankfully, he found none.

you nod in response, a small smile painting your face just before he slowly pulled your shirt over your head. you hadn't been wearing a bra in this moment, i mean, what was the need? you were snuggling on the couch with your husband. a deep breath left his throat as he revealed your bare chest.

"i meant it when i said you were perfect, you know?" alhaitham said, voice sounding genuine. he looked at you like you were the most precious thing in the world. well, to him, you were. you were his wife and there was nothing more precious than that.

"you're only saying that because you're close to getting me naked," you giggle softly, teasing him subtly.

"getting you naked is always a bonus," alhaitham spoke back, "but i truly do mean it, you're perfect," he added, "my perfect, perfect wife."

his hand raised towards your breasts, gently caressing them as his lips moved down to meet yours; them intertwining in a soft and loving dance. "you're so soft.." he mumbled against your lips, pressing his body up against yours.

you could feel his arousal growing against your thigh, the hard-on in his slacks extremely hard to hide as his hips subconsciously moved to gain some friction. his fingers tips came to enclose around your nipple, gently playing with it, his mouth swallowing your tiny moans; he refused to move his lips from yours, desperate to feel you. "i need you so bad.."

slowly, his kisses started moving from your lips and down to your neck, him taking the time to suck and bite the delicate skin there; however, not harsh enough to leave any marks or bruises, he was often careful as he knew they were a pain to cover. your heartbeat quickens and your breath paces as his soft lips edge ever so closer to your breasts, him eventually taking your nipple in his mouth, hand continuing to nurse the other.

quiet moans left your mouth as he pleasured you further, head tilted back a little. alhaitham's gaze raised a little, locking eyes with yours for a few subtle seconds, smirking slightly at how the smallest of touches always managed to get you going. "perfect.." he whispered out once again, never missing a moment to remind you how truly in awe he was of you.

"alhaitham.. please.." you whine out, grinding against his hips a little, resulting in a gentle grunt escaping his lips.

"does my beautiful wife need me?" he asks, his voice slightly teasing, but he knew you loved it when he was at least a little cocky with you during bed. "does she need me as much as i need her?"

his hands trail down to the waistband of the sleep shorts you were wearing, looking up at you once more in search of the consent for him to move on. without hesitation, once he received your permission of course, he pulled them down revealing your embarrassingly soaked core to him.

alhaitham grunted at the sight, his hand coming to wrap around your waist, pulling you closer towards him, kissing your lips gently, fingers needing at the skin of your waist. "my wife.." he whispers against your lips, "i'll make you feel good, okay?" alhaitham continues, "that's all i ever want to do."

not even moments later, his wet, warm lips were trailing towards your inner thighs, gently littering kisses everywhere but where you truly needed him. his hands were firmly placed on your hips, fingertips dancing along the miniature stretchmarks there.

a small whimper leaves your lips as his mouth wrapped around your throbbing clit; he was a pleaser, and oh god, was he pleasing you right now. he knew what to do with his tongue without a doubt, exploring your wet folds.

"oh- god.." you whine gently, hand moving to his head, gripping at his soft hair as his mouth worked its wonders. "too good.. s-shit-" you manage to gasp out, hips subtly bucking up against his mouth which only made him chuckle lowly against you.

"like that, my wife?" he mumbles against you before indulging in you for much longer. it wasn't long before you found yourself getting closer to your high, the many noises from your lips getting louder and louder by the second.

"mmhm," you moan out, "just like that."

"are you close, baby?" he whispers against you, fingers teasing your entrance a little, edging two digits inside you, stretching you out making your eyes roll back a little from the overwhelming pleasure. "cum for me, my wife-"

and with that, you were clenching around his fingers as he curved them inside you, brushing up against g-spot with every motion he made, giving you almost no time to process anything before you were cumming against his mouth; legs shaking, and mouth wide open.

"fuck- fuck-" you whimper, legs shaking around his head.

alhaitham's head moved from between your legs, a little smirk on his face as he watched the way your body twitched for him. "let me fill you, darling..." he whispers, hands flying to pull down the slacks he was wearing. "i need to be in you," he continued, revealing his hard cock that was evidently desperate for attention.

"alhaitham please.." you whisper out, watching the way his hand slowly tugged on his length, biting your lip in anticipation. "i need you just as bad."

a gentle moan left your lips, accompanied by a similar noise coming from alhaitham, as he pushed the tip of his cock inside you. "good heavens-" he moans out, hands tightly grasped onto your waist as he pushed himself further inside you, not stopping until he was all the way in.

"tell me when i can move, my love.." alhaitham spoke in a hushed voice, smiling down at you as he watched your face contort in pleasure. "you're doing so well."

after a few short moments, you gave him the clear to start moving, and with the way your wet walls were gripping onto his thick cock, you didn't have to tell him twice.

his thrusts were soft but deep, hitting all the places you need him to be, moans falling from both your lips at the pace of his thrusts. "so good-" alhaitham gasped out, feeling your walls clench around him subconsciously "my perfect, beautiful wife," he gritted out between each movement of his hips.

the tip of his length was pressing up against your cervix every chance it got, making you want to squeal from how good it truly felt. "you're so deep.." you choke out, eyes rolling back and teeth dug tightly into your bottom lip.

"hmm?" alhaitham hums back in response, staring down at you as his thrusts remained the same pace; deep and slow, different to how he usually was. with alhaitham sex was always wild, fast and hard, not because he didn't care but because that's the way you both liked it. he loved making you see stars in the most unimaginable ways, but tonight.. he was soft, passionate and gentle like he was almost scared you'd break. he was pouring every ounce of love and feeling he had into it, making it something completely new.

"do you think im deep enough to get you nice and full with my child, my perfect, pretty wife?" he asks, grabbing a hand full of one of your breasts as he makes the effort to push himself inside you with a little more pressure.

the question made you whimper a little, but it was audibly a few octaves higher because of the shock of hearing it. you'd briefly spoken about possibly having kids before, and alhaitham had always said that he'd like them but it was always your choice, but it's not a topic of discussion that came up a lot so it was a surprise to hear those words come out of his mouth.

"would you like that, darling.." he spoke softly, caressing the skin of your lower stomach. "i know we haven't spoken about it much, but i cant help think about how pretty you'd look pregnant."

"my gorgeous, wonderful, perfect wife, all pregnant just for me."

[littlexdeaths]

eddie munson x shy fem reader

warnings: reader is a bit insecure, little sprinkle of jealous eddie, reader wears glasses, smooching, also the finest cheese in all the land (i hope) <3

part one | part two

word count: 2.5k

a/n: this ended up bit longer than i intended so oops. but big thanks to @strangerstilinski for brainstorming some ideas with me to further cheesify the kissing scene. and another HUGE thank you to @undead-supernova for helping me with fix some things and for looking this over. I LOVE YOU BOTH <3

“What do you mean you didn’t kiss him?!”

You quickly turn to give Nancy a pointed glare before digging deeper into your locker to retrieve your biology textbook.

But really, it is a valid question.

“I— just,” you blow out an exasperated breath. “I panicked, alright? Trust me, I’m just as disappointed as you are.”

While your date didn’t end on a bad note by any means, it definitely ended on a lame one.

When Eddie dropped you off at home after the two of you spent way too much time cozying up in a corner booth at Benny’s— you weren’t entirely ready to say goodnight to him yet.

But when he walked you to your front door and carefully started to lean in, those pesky nerves got the best of you. Instead, you pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek before he had the chance to reach your lips.

Feelings of disappointment clawed at your insides once your lips brushed against the stubble on his cheek instead of his lips, your tinted chapstick leaving a tinge of pink in its wake. 

Eddie cleared his throat, carefully rubbing the back of his neck while he bid you goodnight. 

You’d barely shut the door behind you when your smile faltered and all those feelings of self doubt you’d managed to push aside all night came creeping back in. 

Everything was going so well, why couldn’t you just kiss him? It wasn’t as if you’d never kissed someone before. 

Your first kiss happened your sophomore year, with band geek Ray Howard in King Steve’s coat closet during a stupid game of 7 minutes in heaven that neither of you enjoyed. 

If you were brave enough to do that, why couldn’t you kiss the guy you actually liked? 

“Well, when are you gonna see him again?” Nancy prompts. You shrug once you slam your locker shut.

“I don’t know… I’m afraid he’s not gonna want another date. I mean, I gave him a peck on the cheek! How lame is that.”

You hug your textbooks to your chest as you head to class with Nancy, who is desperately trying to convince you that Eddie would be insane if he didn’t want to see you again.

You just hoped she was right.

When you don’t see him at lunch, you instantly deflate a little. The doom and gloom that lingers outside the school now mirrors your mood, taking any semblance of your appetite with it. You hadn’t seen him all day, so that only seemed to confirm your worries.

He’s avoiding you. What else could it be?

It’s not like him to skip out on lunch, so instead of heading further into the cafeteria you turn heel to head toward the library— 

And almost collide directly into Eddie.

His leather clad arms instantly wrap around you, a teasing smirk playing on his full lips. Lips you so desperately want to feel pressed against your own.

“Sweetheart, we really gotta stop meeting like this,” he teases, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “One of these days you’ll take both of us out.”

You let out a nervous giggle and an apology, relief filling your chest as his smile grows wider in response. Damn Nancy for always being right.

“Where are you headed in such a rush anyway?” he asks, finally letting you go, much to your dismay.

“Uh… the library. Wasn’t feeling super hungry.”

He nods, leaning his shoulder against the door frame. He looks even prettier than when you saw him on Friday. His curls are a little more unruly, his stubble more pronounced. 

And when you catch the faintest hint of cigarette smoke lingering on his jacket and how it mixes with his spicy cologne— it has your heart stuttering in your chest.

“Well, anyway, I was wondering…”

A small grunt leaves his lips as his body is forced forward, directly into yours. The jock that just shoulder checked him mutters a “watch it, freaks” under his breath before continuing past you into the cafeteria.

The shove has closed the remaining distance between you, your faces merely inches apart now. Your palms resting against his chest, feeling how his breath slightly quickens beneath your fingertips. You could so easily kiss him like this, all you have to do is tilt your head up…

But you choke, eyes darting back down nervously toward your feet when you take a small step back.

“Are you alright?” you ask, meeting his eyes once more.

Eddie doesn’t even seem phased by what just occurred, his warm eyes entirely still focused on you.

“Oh, that’s nothing, sweetheart,” he chuckles, “I can handle myself.”

Eddie motions to his torso, lifting the lapels of his jacket as if to prove his point.

“See? Not even a scratch.”

And it takes all your self control to keep your eyes from wandering lower, past the soft cotton of his shirt, over the handcuff buckle of his belt…

Focus.

“Now, what I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted,” his voice raises in volume, eyes throwing a pointed glare towards the jocks table before they settle back on you. “Would you like to have lunch with me?”

Eddie nods towards the Hellfire table, your eyes drifting across the cafeteria. The familiar group of males are already seated at their usual spots, engaged in a heated debate over something.

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

Eddie can sense your hesitation, shaking his head as he wraps an arm around your shoulders.

“I promise they don’t bite.” He grins, beginning to lead you toward the lunch table. “Can’t say the same for me though.”

He whispers that last part, his lips playfully grazing over the shell of your ear. Eddie can feel how you shiver in response, thoroughly satisfied with himself as you try to compose yourself once you reach his friends.

The guys barely spare either of you a passing glance, still deep in their conversation when Eddie pulls up a chair for you. Right at the head of the table next to his own.

You take a seat with a polite smile, each of the members of Hellfire now noticing your presence. And they can’t hide their utter shock and surprise as Eddie takes his seat beside you. He introduces you properly, going along the table until he reaches the two youngest members of Hellfire.

“While we haven’t been able to coax Sinclair back from the dark side,” he sighs, resting his arm on the back of your chair. “You obviously know Wheeler and Henderson already…”

“Oh, Mike knows her alright,” Dustin interjects, mischievously glancing over at his best friend. “He used to have the biggest crush—”

Mike elbows Dustin in the side before he can even finish his sentence, his cheeks flushing a deep shade of red as he hangs his head.

“Would you shut it?” he hisses, already noting the way Eddie’s gaze hardens as he tugs your chair impossibly closer to his own.

“No… Henderson, please continue.”

A brow quirks up from underneath his bangs, and suddenly the whole table has gone silent, all eyes on their fearless leader.

Dustin nervously swallows, tugging at the collar of his shirt. “It was… really stupid kid stuff, not important! Just forget I even brought it up. It was just a dumb— ”

The younger male’s voice raises an octave when he laughs, his nerves shining through.

“— right, just a dumb little crush,” Mike finishes, but Eddie doesn’t seem entirely convinced.

When you suddenly rest your hand on his knee under the table, his composure begins to slip. His eyes soften when he looks down at you. The whole table is practically holding their breath, in anticipation for Eddie’s next move.

But you beat him to it.

“Someone had to be the president of my fan club, right?” you giggle.

Mike just groans in response, head falling to the table while the other guys begin to chatter amongst themselves again, that underlying tension now beginning to melt. Much like you are under the weight of his gaze.

“Well, I’d gladly take over that position, if you’d have me.”

Your breath hitches at the underlying meaning behind his words, and, god, you’ve never wanted to kiss him more than you do right now.

When Eddie slowly begins to lean in, Dustin practically gags, the chiming of the lunch bell stopping everything in its tracks.

“Saved by the bell,” he mutters under his breath.

The brunette unwillingly rises to his feet and reaches out a hand for you to take, keeping you closely tucked into his side while he walks you to your next class.

Your mind was racing the rest of the afternoon, impatiently watching the hand on the clock tick by ever so slowly— desperately waiting for the final bell to ring.

After Eddie had walked you to history, he planted a playful kiss to the back of your hand. Giving you a dramatic bow before heading in the opposite direction toward Ms. O’Donnell’s classroom. 

You were a fumbling mess once when you took your seat next to Nancy, and you could tell by the look on her face that she wanted to know everything.

So you spilled the beans during your walk to English afterwards, a plan beginning to form in your head with each step closer to Ms. O’Donnell’s.

Three failed kissing attempts was all your poor heart could take, so you spent the entirety of the last period plotting how you’d be able to get Eddie alone.

Which was how you found yourself pacing back and forth on the football field, eyes scanning the trees for any possible signs of movement. The palms of your hands are sweaty despite the crisp air, the fabric of your sneakers dampening with each step you take through the wet grass.

And you’re wondering if maybe this was a stupid idea, that maybe you heard Jeff wrong.

You knew Eddie dealt weed, the whole school did. But having never dabbled with the leafy substance yourself, you weren’t exactly sure where he made his deals at. So it was a stroke of luck when you overheard Jeff mention it in passing to Grant during English.

Something about how he was going to be late for rehearsal because some jock wanted to buy a bunch of reefer behind the football field. And who was Eddie to refuse a good sale? Especially when the douche was offering him a lot of money.

You’re abruptly broken out of your thoughts when you finally see his lanky figure emerging from the tree line and your heart kicks into first gear— about ready to burst out of your chest with each step he takes towards you.

His curls are a little damp from the mist hanging in the air, that signature dimple indenting his cheek when a smile tugs at the corner of his mouth.

And despite your nerves, it’s a welcomed sight.

“Well, I didn’t take you for a stoner, sweetheart,” he begins.

But you don’t give him the chance to give you a proper greeting before you’re springing into action. Your fingers curl into the collar of his denim vest, meeting him halfway as you lean up to press your lips to his…

Only to end up knocking your heads together instead.

A small grunt of pain leaves him and your stomach twists in embarrassment, fingers gently pressing against your forehead as you wince.

“Oh my god, I am so—”

Those words barely have a chance to slip past your lips before he tilts your chin up and carefully molds his mouth over yours. His movements are slow but steady, as if gauging your response.

Your body reacts before your mind can fully process what’s happening, instinctively reeling him in closer and pressing your lips more firmly against his own. He hums softly, the sound setting your whole body alight.

As Eddie slips one of his hands around your waist, the other reaches up to tenderly cup your cheek. And when he begins to guide you backwards, you let him. Only stopping once your back is flush against the goal post. But even then, he doesn’t stop kissing you.

You can feel the cool metal seeping through the thin layer of your jacket, causing goosebumps to rise on the surface of your skin. But even with the cool air continuing to nip at your exposed skin, you feel like you’re on fire.

His lips are like molten honey, sugary sweet and practically melting you to your core. And you swear this is the closest to heaven you’ve ever felt.

When he eventually pulls away and you take a shuddering breath in, your eyes remain closed. You’re practically on cloud nine, basking in the lingering tingles that prickle over your lips. His hand remains on your cheek, thumb brushing over where his lips just were.

Eddie suddenly lets out a deep chuckle, the sound vibrating against your chest while his breath washes over the apples of your cheeks. Only then do your eyes flutter open and you realize the reason behind his amusement.

Your vision is completely obscured, the round lenses of your glasses fogged over from the heat of his breath. You can just barely make out his smile through the frames, but the silliness of the moment has you letting out a giggle of your own.

“May I?” he asks, the tips of his fingers grazing over where the arms of your glasses meet your temples.

You nod immediately, allowing him to remove them with the utmost care. He untucks his Judas Priest t-shirt from his jeans, using the soft cotton to clear the fog away from your lenses. Even with your blurred vision, you manage to catch a glimpse of his tummy before it’s hidden away beneath his shirt again.

When his eyes flick up to meet yours, he can’t help but feel like he’s really seeing you for the first time. Not hidden away behind a book or the thick wire frames of your glasses. Just you, in all your unbridled beauty.

“Thank you,” you murmur as he carefully places your glasses back onto the bridge of your nose.

Eddie just grins, leaning his forearm on the goal post above your head. He smells faintly like weed and peppermint gum, and you really want him to kiss you again.

“How’s about I give you a ride home, hm?”

You can’t hide your smile, nodding your head enthusiastically.

“I’d really like that.”

Eddie leans down to press one more searing kiss to your lips before he slips his hand in yours and pulls you along. The two of you now walking hand in hand across the football field.

“So, sounds like I’ve got some competition with Wheeler, huh?” he teases, squeezing your hand a little tighter in his.

“Oh come on, you’ve never had a crush on a babysitter before?”

Eddie takes a step in front of you, beginning to walk backwards while simultaneously guiding you forward.

“Well… considering my only babysitter was starting to bald and my uncle,” he practically shudders, “I’m gonna say no, sweetheart.”

series taglist: @sheneedsrocknroll92 @blckbrrybasket @your-nightmaredoll @missmarch-99 @fandom-princess-forevermore @mylovelycrazyworld @princesssunderworld

[jamiethebeeart]

“But it’s not gay if he’s dead.” Danny’s head whipped around to stare down the street at two guys walking on the other side. He thought he was free of hearing that phrase ever again. Heart thudding in his ears, he crossed the street to tail these two guys. There was no way? Right? I mean Danny was something like 1,000 miles away from his hometown. There was no way two random guys in the big city of Gotham would’ve ever heard of –

“I don’t know man, it’s never been confirmed whether or not the “big guy” was actually… ya know?”

Danny seethed in frustration at the vague conversation. He stepped around a group of kids as he barely made the end of the crosswalk countdown.

“Nah, Red makes too many uncomfortable jokes about death to not have died.”

Danny sped up, weaving in between people to catch up before he lost the conversation in the din.

“It’s Gotham, we all make jokes about death.”

“Ya, but not like him. He seems to revel in them, like he actually kicked the bucket, permanent-like, not like those people who – I don’t know – cardiac arrest and are technically dead for a couple minutes until the EMTs get to them or whatever.”

A car puttered down the road – releasing a huge plume of exhaust in between Danny and the guys. Danny sighed, fully intending to return to his original path with the reassurance that they weren’t talking about Phantom. Then the next damned sentence came out of one of their mouths.

“Ok sure let’s say you’re right. Is it necrophilia if his body started decaying before coming back?”

‘Fuck it’ Danny thought as he turned back around. He had to see how this conversation ended – definitely not because the answer to that question kept him up night. Absolutely not. Call him a cat because he was just curious and not all at invested in the answer.

“Oh! Dude, shut the fuck up! Why would you – that’s disgusting! Are you kidding me!”

“Answer the question Mr. It’s Not Gay if He’s Dead – necrophiliac: yes or no?”

“No? Have you seen Red’s body? No way a dead guy could have muscles like that – I mean you gotta have working bodily functions right? To build muscles or whatever the fuck? Like have you seen his abs? Or, shit, just his arms - I mean swoon worthy, what I wouldn’t give to have him hold -”

“…….”

“- me…. What are ya looking at me like that for?”

“When, exactly, have you seen his abs.”

“Aaaah - that’s not the point –“

“Sure as hell hope that’s the point.” Red Hood stepped out of an alleyway they were walking past. Even with a helmet on, Danny swore the guy stared straight at him. He was so fucked getting caught listening in to this conversation – could he play it cool? Danny was cool right? Yeah, he could totally pull this off, act totally normal and keep walking. Hunching his shoulders some and turning his body away from the three men, he walked past. Or tried to. Red Hood caught the back of his shirt, stopping him from getting away. Unless Danny was willing to expose his powers to get out this situation, the best he could do was play dumb and hope Hood let him go without too much hassle.

“Boss!”

“Hey Boss – you didn’t happen to only hear the second half of that, did you?”

Red Hood growled, “the part about necrophilia or the part about my abs?”

Danny twisted his head back to see Goon #1 turn pale. “Uuuh – uh- um,” met Red Hood’s question.

A choreographed roll of the eyes, “Better question, why are you talking shit out on the streets and not paying attention to your little stalker,” Hood gestured to Danny.

“I’m not a stalker!” Danny huffed. His eyes widened. All three guys looked over at him. ‘SHIT’ Danny thought. He did not want to catch anyone’s attention more than he had, much less all three.

Goon No. 2 looked at him, as he resumed his squirming in Red Hood’s grasp, “So who are you?”

Danny glanced up to see Red Hood staring down at him. Today just wasn’t his day. “Hood,” Danny blurted out.

Silence. The tips of Danny’s ears turned bright red

“Uhm, I mean, a tourist?” “In Crime Alley, kid?”

"I'm not a kid," Danny muttered.

Hood shook Danny’s shirt hard enough to also shake Danny himself. “Try again. I’ve seen you around often enough to know that’s a lie.”

“It’s true!” Danny lied. “I was visiting the city, my wallet got pickpocketed with most of my money, so now I’m… kind of…. Stuck here? Indefinitely?”

Goon No. 1 laughed at him, “do ya think we’re dumb? You have a cellie right? No way you’re ‘stuck here’.”

“Exactly, so who do you work for? Penguin?” A jab towards Danny’s face. “Riddler?” Another jab and a step towards Danny. “Is it Two Face?” Another, even closer jab. Danny went cross-eyed looking at the finger in front of his nose.

“Back off,” Hood said. Danny breathed a sigh of relief at being given some space. And then the next words came out of Red Hood’s mouth, “Get lost you two – and stop gossiping on the street. And you-“ Hood turned back to Danny, “ – you’re coming with me.” Danny gulped. Today was going down as another shit day in the books for sure.

[atzloverr]

Mafia bf!Yunho x female reader

Here are some mafia!Yunho x reader headcannons/oneshot (idrk what to call it)

includes: Yunho x reader, violence, kidnapping, mafia au, fluff

- He never intended to become a frequent customer at your small coffee shop near ateez’ underground base

- It started as a place for him to go when he needed to escape the gruesome life of the mafia, when he just wanted some peace and quiet

-He soon found himself becoming a regular, and without trying to, starting to feel at home in your small cozy cafe

- He still remembers the first time he saw you, looking so cute in your little apron, focusing on making a specific espresso art for a customer.

- You always found yourself lighting up when Yunho entered the cafe, his presence alone bringing you comfort in an odd way

- He seemed so nice and respectful, never asking too many questions or making any noise in your shop.

- He just sat down at his usual spot, with a book in hand, sipping on a coffee you made perfectly for him

- The other members teased him about his little crush on you, noticing the way the tall male had grown fond of you

- He never let any of the members accompany him though, telling them that this was his spot, and that he wanted to separate it from the mafia life

- He almost felt ashamed of his crush on you, thinking that you deserve someone better, someone who’s not a criminal mastermind

- Regardless of his will to keep you at a distance for your own good, his need to get to know you was stronger

- He tried to promise himself not to get attached…

- You eventually started sitting next to him at times, chatting about your lives and hobbies.

- You were quick to notice his secrecy, and the way he never went into detail about his life.

- It made you a little sad, but you decided not to ask, not wanting to invade his privacy

- Yunho convinced you that you were working too hard, seeing your dark circles grow as of every day.

- When you tried to tell him the same thing, noticing the way his skin looked paler than usual, he just shrugged you off

- Somehow, word had gotten out that Yunho had a special girl, and when ateez got into a twist with another gang, the opposing gang knew exactly who their target would be…

- One night, when you were just about to get home from work, the glass door was suddenly smashed open, and a group of masked men entered the small cafe.

- You crouched down, trying to hide behind the counter, putting a hand over your mouth as the men’s voices started filling the room

- You felt your legs starting to tremble as your heart beat rapidly in your chest

- A man appeared behind the counter, harshly grabbing you. Your hand was replaced by his, as a gun was pressed to your head

- Your wide eyes scanned the room for any means of escape, but only saw three other men, equally as scary as the man holding a gun to your head

- You couldn’t understand any of this, but soon another man came up to you, eyes staring you down.

- He yelled at you to not move a muscle, and you couldn’t help but obey when a sharp needle was inserted into your arm

- You wanted to squirm. You wanted to scream, but you just couldn’t.

- You felt your eyes start to roll back, as your body grew limp in a matter of seconds.

- And then, everything went black.

.｡*ﾟ+.*.｡

- When Yunho heard your name leave Wooyoung’s mouth, his body immediately became stiff

- “Where. Is. She?” Yunho asked, hand finding the gun in his waistband.

- Yunho was sure he had never felt this type of fear before

- When Wooyoung told him he didn’t know where you were, Yunho grabbed him by the collar, almost lifting his smaller body into the air

- “THEN FIND OUT!” Yunho yelled.

- Wooyoung’s eyebrows furrowed at his partner’s sudden frustration. He had never seen Yunho this angry.

- He knew that you were dear to Yunho, but not like this.

.｡*ﾟ+.*.｡

- You slowly felt your surroundings becoming clear to you as you woke up

- You felt your arms aching, the harsh rope binding them leaving a burn in your skin

- Your eyes fluttered open, revealing the scene in front of you

- You were in a dark room, the only thing giving you a whim of the figures in front of you a small lightbulb hanging from the ceiling

- You felt your breath pick up, making the heads of the men snap towards you in an instant

- You tried to move, your instincts screaming at you to flee the situation

- “Well look who’s finally awake,” one of the men snickered, placing his cards down on the small table he sat by with his three companions.

- You felt your memories come flooding back to you from the night before, reminding you of the traumatic experience you had gone through

- You tried to speak, but a cloth in your mouth stopped you from doing so, only letting muffled sounds escape you

- The men laughed evilly, making you tear up

- Why was this happening to you?

- “What do you say boys, do we keep her alive?” one of them asked, a smirk coating his lips.

- “What would make Jeong more angry? if we kill her? or—“ another man stepped closer to your form, grabbing a fist of your hair. “If we keep her as a toy?”

- You felt tears streaming from your eyes as you squirmed desperately. You didn’t understand any of this, but you could collect that these men were purely evil.

- Just as one of them were about to leave another snarky comment, a small knock was heard from upstairs.

- Their heads perked up at the sound.

- “I’ll go get it,” one of them said, picking up a gun before leaving the basement.

- Your gaze followed him as his big body made its way up to the main floor.

- The other three men averted their attention back to you, and you braced yourself for the humiliation you were about to endure.

- “Keep her alive, she’s young and all,” a man said. You felt sick.

- As they were about to continue their discussion about whether or not you should live, a loud bang was heard from upstairs.

- Everyone tensed up in the room, including you.

- You heard multiple gunshots, and many more male voices filling the room.

- The three men in the basement stood up and grabbed their weapons. You heard the sound of guns being loaded, and couldn’t even keep your eyes opened.

- You were too scared.

- Two of the men ascended the stairs, leaving you with the man who was still holding your hair in his hand.

- “Make a sound and you’re dead,” the man warned you, pushing his gun towards your head once again.

- You breathing quickened more and more as the sounds from upstairs escalated. More gunshots and screams were heard, and they only seemed to get closer.

- The man’s grip on your hair only became tighter when the sound came closer to you. You tried to stifle your small whimpers, but they went unnoticed as they exited you anyway.

- An eerie silence filled the place, making you have to choke down your sounds of fear. Was this really the day your life was going to end? Just when things had started to go your way, everything was going to be ripped from you like this?

- You barely noticed as two men came down the stairs at an unbelievable speed. You clenched your eyes shut, not even wanting to know what was going to happen, but then, the hand in your hair suddenly vanished, same with the gun pressed against your forehead.

- The sound of a gunshot made you flinch, your head lowering in submission, as a way for you to beg for your life.

- “She’s here!” a voice called out, as a man stepped closer to you. From the sound of his voice you would guess he was younger than your kidnappers.

- A hand found your head, making you retreat in fear. You still didn’t dare to look at the man in front of you, but was surprised when the hand gently took out the cloth from your mouth, making you gasp at the sudden access to air.

- Your eyes flew open, taking in the man in front of you. He had pretty long, black hair that illuminated his face well, even in the dim lighting. The man behind him stood with his hands behind his back, as if waiting for an order.

- You heard the sound of footsteps rushing down the stairs, and when you saw the man��s identity, your jaw dropped in disbelief.

- You barely noticed as the dark haired man untied your arms, too focused on the sight of the tall man in front of you.

- Yunho.

- Here he was, a panicked but somewhat relieved look on his handsome face. You let out a breath, not finding any words to say.

- Yunho sighed, a single tear dropping from his cheek.

- “Y/n,” he breathed out before rushing towards you.

- You still felt your eyes staring into nothing as his arms flew around you, his welcoming embrace making you tear up.

- You didn’t care about your questions, all that mattered was that he was here now, and you could finally cry into his warm shoulder.

- “Thank god you’re okay,” he cried. You started sobbing, letting the fear you had had to suppress wash over you.

- “I— I was so scared,” you cried, not caring about the seven men gathered around the two of you. It was like a part of you knew. Knew that you were safe with them.

.｡*ﾟ+.*.｡

- “I never wanted you to get involved in any of this…” Yunho confessed, a hand on his forehead.

- “Well, now I am, okay?” you smiled, giving him a small peck on the cheek

- Ever since that incident, Yunho had hesitantly told you about what he actually does. He was convinced you’d run away from him in fear, but you only nodded slowly as you took in the information.

- Now, here you were, in a relationship with a member of ateez, one of the strongest mafias in town.

- You still thanked Yunho every day for saving you, but he tried to assure you that it was his fault you even ended up in that situation.

- “No, it wasn’t!” you argued, pouting almost. “It’s not your fault that they decided to go after me!” you tried.

- Yunho sighed. “That’s what we do. We don’t play nice,” he tried to explain, but you only shook your head.

- “Whatever, I love you anyway,” you said, plastering a kiss on his lips. Making him smile in a way that made your heart melt.

- “I love you too, baby.”

- The gang had started becoming more of a family to you.

- They all knew you were one of them now, since you were with Yunho.

- You had to admit that the mafia life scared you still, but you were still so lucky to find ateez.

- You had made friends for life, and they were so thankful to have you with them.

- You were like a little happy pill, always making them cheer up when they could only focus on work.

- You loved cooking with Wooyoung, playing games with Yeosang or watching movies with Hongjoong.

- It truly felt like you had found your place, even if it was in a secret underground base with eight mafia members.

Heyyyyyy guys hope you enjoyed this little drabble/oneshot or whatever I should call it. Requests are opennnn!

masterlist

[chuulyssa]

── ★ 𝐈 𝐌𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐖𝐀𝐘 !

𝙨𝙮𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨 — bsd men and public sex scenarios

𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚 — smut

‎‎‎‎‎‎‎‎──‎‎‎‎─ tw intended lowercase, public sex, exhibitionism, edging, begging, use of pet names (doll, love, angel etc), praise kink, cockwarming + fingering in fyodor's part, voyeurism + choking + nipple play in nikolai's part

𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜 — dazai, chuuya, fyodor, nikolai x reader

𝗗𝗔𝗭𝗔𝗜 is always ready for sex, whether it be in the comfort of your bedroom or the last seat of a movie theater. you cannot physically count the number of times you've asked him to dick you down and he has cooed in reply, pulled you into a random corner, ridden your panties to the side and pried your legs apart with a smile. that, however, doesn't mean there aren't times when you have to beg for his fat cock. he is quite a nuisance, even when the two of you have to make it quick, locked up in a public room. he enjoys watching you flailing your arms around in a silent tantrum, unable to moan or groan or whine, afraid of being heard by others.

“now now bella,” he says in a sing-song voice. “if i give it to you now, and you end up being so loud that the others hear, it will be bad, won’t it?”

he watches you rub your cheek against his bare cock, throat dry from the hardness which he refused to let you suck.

“i’ll be quiet, i promise,” you say. “please please, can i have it?”

“you always say that, dolly,” he strokes your hair lovingly and you lean into his touch. “but we both know you never keep your promise. i would like you to hush for me, alright? we can be as loud as we want at home, but not here, hm? the president is in the next room; it’s a very important meeting, okay?”

you nod vigorously, and he chuckles.

“ah now you know i’m weak for those eyes,” he pulls you up and sits you nicely on his cock all in one go, clamping a hand over your mouth as your eyes widen at the forced penetration. “we’ve got an hour, baby. let’s make it nice and slow, yea? don’t want anything to spill or make a mess, hm? easy now, doll. ride me like a good girl, but quietly.”

𝗖𝗛𝗨𝗨𝗬𝗔 doesn't mind pissing off mori in ways more than one. he cannot recall how many times he's fucked you in his own office in various positions, and so messily too, just to see his boss's reaction. he, unlike dazai, doesn't have to be quiet though. it's his building, he can do whatever the fuck he wants, shove his cock down your throat wherever he wants. but he likes to go at a tantalizingly slow pace. he knows he can take his time. he's not gonna get 'caught'. his subordinates know better than to intrude on his business. it's just you, spread-eagled on the table, and him, rutting his hard cock inside you.

“you like it, yea? then why don’t you say it?” he groans in your ear. “you can tell me whose pussy this is, can’t you? why don’t you say my name, doll? whose girl are you?”

“y-yours, all yours,” you hiss and he gently pushes your face back into the mahogany table, the smell of fresh wood and sex clouding your senses.

“what’s my name?”

“chuuya–”

“chuuya what?”

“port mafia executive chuuya nakahara and the owner of my body,” you breathe. he's taught you to say that whenever he asks you that.

“good girl,” he says proudly, smile faltering for a second as he adjusts his pace. “you gonna come, baby? i can feel you. come, come on this cock, we’ll let it get on the floor and table, just to have some fun, yea?”

you widen your eyes, and he chuckles, gloved hand coming to pinch a nipple.

“no objections. mori's office or not, i decide what i do with my pussy.”

you shuddered. he's not afraid and it's seen. because after all, who's gonna fire him?

𝗙𝗬𝗢𝗗𝗢𝗥 isn't always the one to initiate sex, much less one in public. then again, your numb cunt and shaking legs are testimony of how well he does when he decides to. public sex for fyodor meant shoving you by your hair down on his cock, pretending to be interested in the ramblings of fukichi while you were sucking him off under the table. when he feels he has to reward you for good behaviour though, he allows you to perch on his lap, your panties shifted to the side as he nests his cock deep inside your warm pussy, offering his ideas while the others don't bat an eye at the unusual approach of the mastermind.

he drums his fingers on the table, sliding them down to pinch your clit. your eyes widen, neck snapping around to look at him as he continues to look ahead. from the corner of his sly smile, he mutters, “i’ve told you to stop moving so much, havent i, angel? or would you like to leave the meeting? i wouldn’t mind either way. you’re distracting a hard-working man.”

you frown at him. “i’m not moving around–” your angry whisper is cut off by a finger slipping inside your already filled cunt, stretching it out even more. you hiss loudly, fist clenching around his cape.

“quieten, printsessa, or i might have to send you away. you’re not being very good now. i’d like to have a word with you after the gathering departs. in private.”

you scowl and turn back to staring at a wall in front of you, when you feel his finger escaping your soaking cunt. sighing in relief, you barely anticipate the slight jolt of his hips as he forced his cock deeper inside you for the fraction of a second before bringing it back in place.

your eyes wander frantically to see if anyone noticed the act. nobody did, thankfully, or maybe they had learned not to intrude on his business. either way, you will pay the price for boredom in the next thirty minutes.

𝗡𝗜𝗞𝗢𝗟𝗔𝗜 is similar to dazai when it comes to enthusiasm related to public sex. he's into voyeurism, a bit much for your liking, but he swears by your name he won't do it if you don't like it. but you don't miss the way he casually lifts your skirt up to check your ass out, or how he sticks a finger inside your cleavage line to harden your nipples. he has always wanted to be free, and what defines freedom more than sex in the back of his car, where the windows are open and any passerby can hear the commotion, wild and alive like never before?

“but kolya, we have to be quiet, we can’t just–”

“hush, my little birdie. do as i say and you won’t be in trouble,” he lays you down comfortably on the seat before proceeding to bang the shit out of you. your meek attempt at stifling your moans by covering your mouth is unsuccessful, and highly futile, he thinks. “now why would you do that, my dove? why would you not bless my ears with your heavenly sounds? let me hear them, dove, please.”

“kolya–”

“yes yes yes love, just like that,” he coos praises into your ear. “but you can go louder, can’t you?”

his mouth sucks on one of your nipples, begging you silently to give him more, to say more.

“please tell me how i make you feel, dove. i might die.”

“so good, kolya, so good.”“yes dove, now can you tell the whole word how i make you feel? please? for me?” he fastens his pace to force moans out of you, hand reaching to your throat to make you say his name. “want the whole word to know you love me, dove. that you’re mine. all mine.”

and his demands grow sinister by the moment with threatening consequences.

“whoopsie, no dove you’re gonna have to keep it in for now. can’t let you come unless i see you beg for it, now can i?”

it was always a long night of satisfying sex with him.

[sturniqlo]

Spilled Water- M.S

summary: where pregnant!reader films a video with the triplets and her water breaks and matt is freaking out. BLURB

cw: cursing, panicking(?)

an: lowercase intended

masterlist | join my taglist

-----------------------------------------------

"no! the cooking oil! that's y/n's coconut oil!" nick, wearing a chef hat and a white apron, snatches the small mason jar from chris' hands. "what is my coconut oil even doing here?" y/n waddles to nick to grab it. "i went to grab it from your bathroom, i thought nick had said coconut oil." chris explains.

"how'd you hear- nevermind." nick sighs and returns to the mixing bowl. "i don't know where their stuff is!" both nick and chris had came over to matt and y/n's apartment as y/n was nearing the end of her pregnancy and matt didn't want her to be alone in case she went into labor.

"the oil is in the kitchen, genius." matt says, and turns to the cabinet where the oil sits behind. "okay, guys, today we are making a cake from scratch!" nick holds up the empty mixing bowl and talks to the camera. "usually we bake boxed cakes, so we decided to switch it up for todays video. and don't worry, we have the expert here, y/n!" she shyly waves to the camera.

she's been in a couple of their videos and the fans adored her. "guys, y/n makes these really good chocolate croissants, but the boss man nick wanted a fucking cake." chris crosses his arms. "hey, what's wrong with cake? we," y/n points to her face and her swollen belly. "also wanted cake." matt laughs. "thank you, y/n and baby. see, chris, i'm not the only one who wanted cake."

"alright, enough about who wanted cake. let's get this show on the road." matt drapes his arm around his pregnant girlfriends shoulders. "okay, chris, pour in two cups of flour." nick reads off of his phone. "where are the measuring cups?" chris looks around. "ugh! motherfucker look around!"

"don't be mean to chris." y/n walks away from matt's hold and opens the drawer to grab the measuring cups. "thank you-" chris starts off. "it's not our fault he's a little bit different." y/n breaks out into a laugh and nick and matt follow her. "okay, okay stop it! i think i peed a little. she's pressing on my bladder."

"alright now that we have all of our dry ingredients mixed together, we're going to add in our wet ingredients." matt says. "how many cups of water do we need?" y/n asks, a bit in discomfort. she's been having a bit of braxton hicks lately, but her doctor said to not worry. however, these were a bit different but, she didn't really pay too much attention to it.

nick tells her how much and she walks towards the sink and pours it. as she walks back nick gasps. "y/n, you spilled the water on yourself." he points to her stained grey sweatpants. "what? no i didn't, look." she holds up the cup that holds the water.

"babe, your water broke!" matt says with widened eyes. "oh my god!" she sets down the cup on the counter and looks down, sure enough her water did break. "i- i don't know how i didn't feel it." she giggles. "chris go- go grab the baby bag it's in the- in the- fuck- the closet by the uh- the door." matt stumbles over his words. chris doesn't do anything but nod and hurry off to get the bag.

"oh my gosh, she's coming? like now?" nick says, y/n laughs as she can't take him seriously with the chef hat on. "y/n, come on, we need to take you to the hospital!" matt places a hand on the small of her back and leads her to the door.

"matt, baby, wait. i need to change my pants." she turns and walks into their shared room. "what? no, you're fine like this! you're in labor." matt says, running a hand through his hair. "hey, calm down, okay." y/n reassures him and holds his face in her hands. "i'm feeling fine as of now, i think we still have some time until i start getting contractions."

"okay, are- are you sure?" she nods. "i'm sure."

"oh!" y/n shrieks, putting a hand on her back as she stands in front of the bathroom counter. she was brushing her hair until she got her very first contraction. "matt, get the car ready!" she take a deep breath and tries to ignore the pain. "come on, come on! chris has the bag, is it okay if they come?"

"i don't care if- fuck." she gets a strong one. "it's okay, you're okay." he kisses her forehead and walks her out the room. "chris lock the door. her keys are on the table." matt tells chris as nick now holds her and walks her out the door. "how are you feeling?" nick says. "like im about to give birth."

"wait! what about the cake?" chris says.

[wolvietxt]

★ argument comfort w/ bucky.

a/n : i’m probably gonna start formatting my shorter fics like this now! remember to like and rb :3 also reqs are open!

you hadn't meant for the argument to escalate, but once bucky started raising his voice, everything spiraled. his usual calm demeanor was gone, replaced by something sharp and cutting, words that stung more than either of you anticipated.

“you never listen!” his voice boomed, louder than he likely intended, but it still made you flinch.

your arms instinctively wrapped around yourself, trying to shrink into the couch, wishing you could disappear altogether. your mind raced with anxious thoughts, the familiar tightness in your chest creeping up.

bucky noticed the shift in your posture, the way your face turned away, how small you looked compared to just a few minutes ago. his breath hitched, and the anger quickly drained from his features, replaced by guilt that settled heavy in his gut. he took a tentative step forward, his hand reaching out before it faltered, unsure.

“hey… i—" his voice was much softer now, almost apologetic, but you didn’t meet his eyes.

he knelt in front of you, his large hands resting on his knees as he sat there quietly, watching you closely. "i’m sorry," he muttered, his voice rough around the edges but sincere. “i shouldn’t have yelled.”

you still didn’t move, staring blankly at the floor, your arms hugged tight around yourself like a protective shield. bucky shifted a little closer, the edge of his fingers brushing your knee. “please, doll… look at me.”

the gentleness in his voice made your chest ache, and your resolve crumbled. you turned your head slightly, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. he looked guilty, almost pained. his brows furrowed, eyes soft as they searched your face for any sign of what you were feeling.

“i didn’t mean to hurt you,” he said, leaning in just enough to rest his hand on top of yours. “i got caught up in my own damn head, and i took it out on you.” his thumb grazed your knuckles slowly, grounding you. “that’s on me.”

you blinked, feeling the familiar prick of tears threatening to spill over. he squeezed your hand gently, not pushing for anything more than what you could give.

"i’m here, okay?" he murmured. "i’m not going anywhere."

with a shaky breath, you nodded, finally letting your fingers curl around his hand, the warmth of his touch comforting in a way only bucky could provide. he pulled you towards him, arms wrapping around your waist, holding you close as he pressed his forehead against your shoulder.

“i’m sorry,” he repeated, his voice barely a whisper now. his grip was tight, like he needed to feel you close to remind himself that you were still here, still with him.

you buried your face in his hair, taking in the familiar scent of him, letting the weight of his apology settle between the two of you. his hands rubbed slow, soothing circles along your back, and you melted into him, the fight already forgotten.

bucky lifted his head after a moment, pressing a soft kiss to the side of your jaw. “forgive me?”

you sniffed, nodding into his chest as he kissed your forehead again, this time lingering a little longer. his lips brushed against your temple, his scruff tickling your skin, drawing a quiet giggle from you despite everything.

“there’s my girl,” he whispered, smiling against your skin. “we’re okay, right?”

"yeah, james." you whispered back, sinking further into his embrace, a soft hand slowly bringing his chin down to yours. "we’re okay."

[sehaedazokla]

stark men and a tyrell reader

fem! reader terms and descriptions 

check this out for more cregan x tyrell!reader content: he that dares

a/n: this was supposed to be a brief, onetime thing but there’s just something about cregan and a tyrell reader that’s sitting with me…

robb is absolutely heart-eyed from the moment you step out of your carriage. you have the most beautiful light green and gold dress, pink roses embroidered onto the bodice above your gentle curves. you smell of roses and vanilla and honey and have the sweetest eyes and manners so robb is perhaps justifiably a little love struck at first.

but robb is observant and he sees things. you have made the entire castle love you which means the maids have the freshest linens brought to your room first and the chef bakes you all sorts of sweets. the other young lords of the north shower you with gifts and line up to dance with you at balls as you gaze down demurely and flutter your fan. you have acquired quite a large number of expensive gifts in such little time at winterfell.

and when robb is looking over battle plans and drafting mock strategy you elegantly peak over his shoulder and make a quiet suggestion that is absolutely ruthless and when robb plays out the scenario you have crushed the hypothetical opponent. he’s whipping around to ask you how you thought of that, but you have already wandered out the doors, light colored fabric swishing behind you. 

and the more he watches, the more he sees of you. a little eye roll when one of the other lords drops his hand too low during a dance, the way your long fingernails tap sharply yet quietly on the table when you hear someone say something stupid. a shake of your head and raise of your eyebrows when you turn away after having to be too sweet and too liked to get whatever it is you were after at that moment. and what he loves most of all is that look of absolutely judgmental irritation when you thought you’d been alone in the library and overheard some boys saying dirty things about one of the maids. 

and from that point on, robb is stubbornly determined - with that hardheaded resolve that men of the north all seem to have - to get to know the real you. but you have the sweet-as-a-flower act down to perfection and are not quick to break. you catch onto his little game, but against your better judgment you decide to play along. it’s endearing, almost. 

but one night at a feast you’ve been hounded all night by the incessant pining of a lord from a smaller house, who won’t let you get even a moment to breathe. and after an hour of sheer torture via the man’s slimy attempts to lure you into the hall, robb sweeps in to save you. his hand in yours as he guides you gently to the side of the room for a break. robb doesn’t say much, but with a gentleman’s smile pointedly makes a polite comment on the other man’s poor manners. and you are so annoyed and irritated you roll your eyes and utter the most scathing insult that you’ve been bottling up for the last hour.

the way his blue eyes light up would take your breath away, your lips parting slightly as he smiles at you like he’s been given a mountain of gold

“aye, there you are.”

he would say, an almost childishly proud grin on his face. 

—

cregan spots you above him on a balcony when he comes to king’s landing. it’s quiet, during the time when his army was keeping the court there. your elegantly arranged hair and delicately embroidered gown catch the stray sunlight from a window, bathing you in flecks of gold. 

the lord from the north stands below you as you gaze down with an unreadable expression - you had wanted to catch a glimpse of him to see what sort of man currently held power at the capital. what had intended to be a small scouting mission becomes a long gaze as you find yourself drawn in and cregan seems equally as enthralled. you tilt you chin down delicately, giving him a small curtsy before you slip off into the shadows of the balcony.

and it is an interesting game at play from then forth. cregan has many tasks to attend to at king’s landing, yet his eyes are constantly drawn to whatever area of the court you stand in when you are present with the other lords and ladies. you are quick to take advantage of this - introducing yourself, eyes gently on the ground as you curtsy in front of him. 

it’s a slow and sensual meeting - cregan takes his time with something for the first time since he left winterfell. his eyes fall to your lips, your collarbone, the curve of your chest that’s shamelessly lifted by your corset. and despite your intention to win him over for political reasons, you can’t help but pause a moment at the way your name is said, low and deep in his northern accent. and then he holds your gaze, even and steady, like he never wants to look anywhere else. the want is mutual and strong and both of you know it. 

cregan’s taking you in, eyes firmly trained on yours as he takes your hand in his own. but instead of kissing it as you expected, he simply lifts it slightly, thumb brushing over the pressure point on your wrist. 

“-no, i haven’t had the pleasure my lady.”

he murmurs, before you can finish your sentence. 

however, the thing with cregan is that you get what you see. he has that strong, unyielding sense of stark justice and it is everything to him, which he shows at court everyday. and you have been taught and raised to be more deceptive than that. to play your enemies with a bat of your eyelashes and a sweet smile upon your lips. your family expects you to win him over for their safety and security, and you love them more than anything.

but love lust is the death of duty, is it not? both of you have ‘good’ albeit different intentions - cregan is devoted to justice and you to your family. you two have a few things to teach each other about differing perspectives and upbringings.

[anemoiashifts]

The age changing debate from a twenty three year old Reality Shifter.

⭑.ᐟ recently ive seen a ton of arguments on shiftok of what’s okay / what isn’t okay to do in your desired reality regarding aging yourself up or down to date characters or have certain experiences like going to high school, going to college, reliving your childhood, etc.

when you shift you are fully embodying that version of yourself. when you shift you are everything you intended to be. you have that mentality. you have a certain set of experiences under your belt that make up your desired reality self.

by throwing around words like p3d0 & placing that onto adult shifters for expressing they’d like to be friends & date characters they’ve liked since they were children, it diminishes the meaning of that word. it also makes the community incredibly ageist; like there’s a certain amount of time people have to shift or else they can’t shift there. thus, creating unnecessary pressure for people to shift within a “certain amount of time”.

some people just want to re-live their schooling who didn’t have a good time due to bullying. some people want to befriends their favorite characters so age themselves appropriately & accordingly when they do so with non-malicious intentions because they didn’t shift / were unaware of the idea of shifting as children & still hold these places closely to their hearts. in the same breath, minors will age themselves up & have adult experiences & nobody questions it.

keeping what I just said in mind, not everyone wants to shift to date. some people have no romantic intentions for when they shift. someone people are aromantic or asexual, like myself. when people say “shifting for ____” it doesn’t always mean romantically. it could mean “shifting for” a comfort character. it could mean “shifting for” platonic love. when people say “im shifting for draco malfoy” — he could be their brother in their desired reality or their dad or their best friend. not everything is inherently s3xu4l & that’s on you if your brain goes there when adults mention shifting for someone.

aging yourself down isn’t just reserved for media that includes minors. shifting can aid in re-living stages of life trauma free. it can help people — both adults & children — who would’ve liked to live a live of normalcy instead of what they have experienced in this reality.

i can guarantee that minors who are so hellbent on saying “adults can’t shift to places like harry potter because hogwarts is a school for children” & “aging up characters to date them is wrong” who will go on to still not have yet shifted into their adulthood / later in life will change their minds really fast once they turn eighteen & then nineteen & so on. by telling people it is wrong to do something in your desired reality, that is policing people’s desires realities weather you like it or not — something the community has agreed is unproductive because it’s your desired reality & not anyone else’s.

do i agree with certain things that ive seen people wanting to do ? no. but do i vocalize that & add onto the dozens of others parroting my thoughts when that person clearly has their heart set on doing something in their desired reality a certain way. why would i ? calling them out & trying to persuade them won’t do anything. they probably have seen the debates of “is this wrong or right” already. at the end of the day, people will do whatever they want despite others trying to influence that. im focused on my shifting journey, not making sure everyone else is going by the book because there is no book when it comes to shifting. if i took the time to tell people online everything I disagreed with on this app that i came across, i would have zero life outside of social media & severely neglect my own shifting journey in addition to mental health.

[dazaiandhislovelybandages]

hi! what about jjk characters (or any characters) squeezing yn to tight in their sleep and yn wakes up. it can maybe be because of a nightmare and yn comforts them 🫠🫠

Tight Hugs with Nanami and Gojo

Gojo Satoru

Gojo doesn't usually have nightmares. Hell, that man is so tired that he barely gets to dream at all. But what Gojo usually does and by usually I mean all the time, is that he hugs you. He is a huge cuddler and loves to be both the big spoon and the little spoon, depending on his mood. Due to his height and overall physique, it isn't really uncommon for him to be the big spoon, with your back pressed against his chest while the two of you are laying on your sides.

But Gojo sometimes doesn't really control himself. He is not really at fault because, in his defense, you make him relax and subsequently let his guard down. And usually his body is tense, yes using his Limitless technique has become a second nature to him but that doesn't really mean that he doesn't get tired from time to time. That being said, his muscles tend to get tense a lot.

"Satoru..." you groaned and turned around, making an effort to push him away from you.

"I said I am sorry." He let out a chuckle that came out ruspier than he intended since he had just woken up. It wasn't the first time Gojo had decided to stretch his arms while having them wrapped around you. He never meant any harm, he would just genuinely forget and squeeze you a little too tight for your comfort.

Rolling your eyes, you wrapped your arms around him this time, effectively making him the little spoon since the only way to save yourself from this man and his strange sleeping habits would only be if you were in control.

Nanami Kento

Nanami comes home from work completely exhausted. There's not a single part of him that doesn't need to relax. While you often help him with providing him with a nice massage during which he gets to talk about his day, it's not like you can do much about the mental part.

He doesn't get nightmares often but when he does, they can be pretty intense, fully inspired by all the horrors he daily deals with at work. Since most of the time the two of you sleep while cuddling each other, you can't help but find yourself to be a 'victim' of his nightmares.

"Nanami..." You gently shake his shoulders and this time he does wake up. His forehead is covered in sweat, the only sign that showed he had just had a nightmare. That and the fact that he had squeezed you to tight.

Nanami, on his side, knew exactly why you woke him up. It wasn't the first time he had done it and it bothered him a little because he had promised himself that he would try to control it even though it wasn't something one cannot control. "Sorry, my love. It was just a nightmare, hm?" He leaned in and placed a soft kiss on your forehead before covering you up with the blanket once more. "Let's go back to sleep, I defeated the curse in my dream anyways."

[sneez]

“My lords, I bring you news—news of the existence of mankind!”

gwynplaine in the house of lords! please don't tag as body horror or anything similar [id in alt text]

[sarahreesbrennan]

Quick Evil Note

To all my wicked darlings, I have now received rather a lot of messages asking me about the influences of Long Live Evil. And I wish to get messages about LLE and truly appreciate the ones I do get! And I wish to answer them. But answers about influences are tricky.

The book has been out in the US for a little over two weeks, and it’s going so well so far, I couldn’t be more delighted and appreciative about its reception.

But also I’ve been informed (not asked) that two of my characters are obviously somehow both Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy of Harry Potter, and Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji of Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation. (Very puzzling as I don’t think these pairings - and one isn’t a pair - have much in common with each other or with mine. Vague hostility against a vaguely academic backdrop for a bit? For the record… in the book everyone is an adult and I don’t even have any academic backdrops to be vaguely hostile in front of…) This hasn’t happened to me in a long time, because I haven’t had an original novel out in a long time due to illness, and it is upsetting to always be discussed differently than writers who didn’t openly link their real names to their fan identity.

I have very different feelings and new appreciation for fandom than I once had. It’s been amazing to see and meet people who have stuck with me for decades. People are generally way more open and affectionate to and within fandom than they once were. Love matters to me a good deal more than hate. But getting death threats in your early 20s for excitedly telling your Internet friends you were going to publish a book does mark the psyche, and so does having your characters dismissed as other people’s characters.

And we can say there is nothing wrong with fanfiction or writing fanfiction and there isn’t! Fanfiction is great and can be genius. Terry Pratchett wrote Jane Austen fanfiction, and didn’t (and shouldn’t) have people saying Captain Wentworth = Captain Vimes. Still, when a TV show is discussed as ‘like fanfiction’ or when Diana Gabaldon said she didn’t like fanfiction and many said ‘YOU write fanfiction’ it isn’t intended in any kind spirit, even when it’s fannish folk saying it. And it’s just generally odd to have everyone call your apple a tomato, and has had professional consequences for me in the past.

However! All the asks I’ve received have been very kind, and I do want to answer them. I do want to talk about my influences because they are manifold and because I actually think it’s important to always talk about influences. I don’t believe stories exist in isolation - we tell tales in a rich tradition, and also a story doesn’t come alive to me all the way until it’s heard or read.

Long Live Evil is a love letter to fandom: it’s chock full of references to many many stories I’ve loved, to fairytales, myths and legend and Internet memes and epic fantasy and meta. My acknowledgements are endless partly for this reason. I do owe a great debt to many portal fantasies and archetypes and musicals and jokes about genre and plays through the ages, though I do think of my characters as themselves and nobody else.

I was frankly tempted to go ‘Yes I stole EVERYTHING! Bwhahaha!’ But while I am thoroughly enjoying and finding great freedom in my villain era, I do want to talk sincerely to you all as well, especially when asked sincerely interested questions.

But I’m a little scared to do so and have people say ‘AHA! Now we know what it’s fanfiction of’ (it’s happened before) or ignore me and go ‘we know the truth!’ (it’s happened before) and to feel like I’ve injured my book. Long Live Evil means more to me than any other and I really want to get talking about it right, and make sure it has the best reception I can give it.

So. Questions on all Evil topics very very welcome but answers to influence questions may come slowly. Bear with me. I am working on this!

[thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai]

The beauty of accidental marriage proposals

Yuuri very likely didn't intend to propse to Viktor at the airport but his heart knew what it (and he) truly desired and twisted his words into a proposal—or rather something akin to a proposal that resulted in a spontaneous engagement.

Let's unpack this.

Yuuri returns from the Rostelecom Cup with his mind full of things that he wants to tell Viktor. While we don't learn the details, his inner monologue in the previous scene gives us a good idea of the things he's mulling over.

Yuuri has convinced himself that Viktor will abandon him after the Grand Prix Final. Thus, that competition is his final chance to win gold and he's determined to fulfil the promise he made in his speech in ep. 5 and win that medal. But even if doesn't win gold, there is one thing that he feels he needs to do after seeing skaters and skating fans react to Viktor becoming a coach at two consecutive competitions.

Regardless of how much Yuuri has profited from Viktor's support, he is very conscious about the fact that Viktor belongs to the ice. Or at least that is what his anxious brain has convinced him of. In this sense, giving up his own career so that Viktor can resume his own is an act of love and the only possible solution for them to stay together (in Yuuri's brain).

We never learn about the end of Yuuri's contemplation, but the subtext of the next scene implies that breaking up with Viktor is not an option. Or if it was an option, it was off the table once he was back in Viktor's arms.

Since Yuuri has anxiety, it's safe to assume that he has been overthinking his talk with Viktor over and over during the flight, going through all kinds of scenarios based on Viktor's imagined reaction. After hours on the plane, his brain must have been on the verge of exploding, casting poor Yuuri into a state of total overwhelm. If you have anxiety, you can possibly relate.

However, the moment that he spots Viktor, his mind goes blank and instinct takes over as he runs into Viktor's arms and instead of whatever speech he has prepared, he just blurts out the following line:

僕も考えてた。引退まで 僕のこと—　お願いします！ "I've been thinking, too. Please take care of me until I retire!"

The English translation is a bit messed up here. In the original, Yuuri never uses the word coach in that line. "Please take care of me" is Japanese proposal language. The translators probably didn't recognise this nuance and sadly, the nuance is still lost in the Bluray version.

But that's why Viktor recognises the proposal in Yuuri's words.

However, based on the details given and the illogical ways anxious brains work, Yuuri intended to inform Viktor about his retirement plans and to voice his desire to make the most of the little time he thinks they have left. But that's not what his heart wants. And since episode 5 we know what that is:

初めて自分から繋ぎとめたいと思った人、それがヴィクトルです

A more accurate translation of that line is "The first person I want to tie myself to and never let go is Viktor" because 繋ぎとめたい means wanting to tie someone / something to you and never let it go (see this translation error masterpost).

Of course, Yuuri doesn't want his relationship with Viktor to end and no matter if his anxiety his skyrocketing in the face of the GPF looming ahead, that desire has taken root in his heart and brain. However, his anxiety stops him from proposing actually and turns his addition "until I retire" into a gentle prodding to find out whether he and Viktor are on the same page.

And of coruse, they are.

And it's all Yuuri has wished for. He's been anxious the whole time. Until Viktor recognises the proposal and response with a yes in the same fashion that Yuuri has asked.

To wrap all of this up:

Absence nurtures desire and in this case, the time apart has shown Yuuri and Viktor how much they want to be by each other's side. Because he missed Viktor so desperately, Yuuri's heart wins over his anxiety for once and enables him to tell Viktor his deepest desire. By recognising said desire, Viktor is able to accept the proposal and the two boys are now officially engaged. And that's yet another beautiful aspect about this show.

Unfortunately Viktor didn't really catch the part about the retirement, which will result in him thinking that Yuuri wants to break up when Yuuri announces his retirement plans in Barcelona. On the other hand, knowing that Viktor wants to stay by his side forever is a huge relief for Yuuri and allows him to enter the GPF without any emotional baggage.

Bonus: look at that cute tiny smile right between Viktor recognising the proposal and the second hug.

For further readings related to this please check out:

Japanese dating culture in YOI

Unwrapping "Let's end this"

On Yuuri's top-secret love life

If you enjoyed this meta you might like to check out my YOI canon works on AO3 or just support me by reblogging this post.

[akkivee]

[rottenpumpkin13]

what are some impulsive purchases the firsts have made?

Sephiroth, the "I just Thought It Looked Interesting" Purchaser:

• A pendulum wall clock shaped like a lucky cat.

• A snuggie.

• Several lava lamps.

• An armillary sphere that barely fit through his apartment door.

• A feather quill pen that Angeal tried to veto because "you're never going to use it" that Sephiroth only uses when he's in Angeal's visual range.

• A pack of scented markers.

Angeal, the "It was On Sale" Purchaser:

• Bongos he bought at a garage sale for 10 gil (10¢).

• Five crates of zucchini he got for free from a farmer in the grasslands. Angeal's recipes included zucchini for three weeks.

• One set of 10 folding chairs was 40% off so he bought two sets. He lied and told Genesis that he only bought one though.

• A used automatic pet feeder with a camera he bought from a shady guy online that was "basically a steal." He doesn't have pets, so instead he fills it with veggie chips and leaves it in his office. He has multiple videos from the feeder where the timer goes off, and Sephiroth, Genesis and Zack sneak in to grab some chips.

Genesis, the "I'm Rich So It Doesn't Matter" Purchaser:

• An expensive liquor bottle in a language he couldn't read that ended up being fancy bottled water.

• An ice sculpture of himself that was delivered while he was out. He came back and it was a puddle in front of his door.

• A plain, black T-shirt that was designer and therefore 10,000 gil. He told Angeal the price and got lectured for three hours.

Zack, the "YOLO" Purchaser Killer Of His Bank Account:

• A Silver Elite premium membership card that comes with the chance to get a photo with Sephiroth. Even though he knows Sephiroth personally.

• An expensive leather jacket complete with spikes. He wore it once and then never again because he thought he looked mean and unapproachable.

• A trampoline.

• A three person bike that Angeal made him return after he, Cloud and Kunsel almost died on the highway.

• A Touch Me he bought from a shady guy in the slums that he intended to keep as a pet, but ended up escaping and causing a SOLDIER Frog catastrophe.