#like I can't describe how much something well written means for me and how strong emotions I feel

[katyspersonal]

:(

[messrsrarchives]

How are you so open to so many different ships but draw the line at dramione 😭 (no hate! Genuinely curious as both a drarry and Dramione shipper 🫶)

i can't even,,, i wish i could explain in my usual yappy way i dislike dramione but i can't. i,,, there's no words to describe how thick and well-drawn this line is i just HATE it so much. (prefacing here ofc that idc what people like or dislike none of this is real)

and i mean !! the creativity and commitment? impeccable. yk i really respect people who take the time to craft a character's personality to fit the dynamic! there's a lot of creativity that goes into erasing hermione entirely and forming her into an oc that wou- see i can't be yappy i am now entering aggressive territory

but essentially! enemies to lovers is a trope i won't read and yessss drarry is typically classified as that by most people but there's a big difference between drarry's rivalry and the way that's put forth in canon (blew my mind that harry was straight the first time i read the books) and literal oppression, harrassment and bullying and that's just,,, not a dynamic i like to read. or a situation i can see draco and/or hermione willingly being in without stripping away core parts of their character. we all know that hermione is used in a very self-inserty way (which also,,, yk go ahead! none of this is real i hope people are having fun with that) but it 😭😭 YK WHAT ENERGY IT GIVES ME? 😭😭 yk that one emma watson interview where she's like "he was a bit older, he had a skateboard, he was a bit of a bad boy" about tom felton? that's the energy it gives me of like "*debby ryan smile* i like them baddd"

and from what i have seen and engaged in, i don't fw the dark "romance" genre either. not a big fan of that. actually an avid hater of dark "romance".

and like it's fanfiction !!! i'm sure there's great ones out there, i'm sure people are able to write around the fact he literally says he wants her dead multiple times, watches her get tortured, mocks her appearance, bullies her, calls her a slur (am i forgetting anything?) and shape it into something else but i *personallyyyy* cannot. it gives when your parents told you little boys on the playground bullied you because they liked you and it's like,,, okay well i hate myself right now ! i guess this is what love feels like ! but also i see the appeallllll of like,,, a love that's pure enough and strong enough to defeat "evil" but omg.

okay. i'm done. ESSENTIALLY 😁☝🏻 i see the appeal vaguely but i, much like hermione, would have to be crafted into a completely different person to enjoy it because it's filled with everything i hate. (again, generalising. i'm sure there's decent ones out there but i do not care LOL)

romione? impeccable. i'm trying to think who else i've read hermione with? OH fred!? impeccable. really big into the idea of hermione and percy at the moment ! i've read pansmione and kinda fwed that but it's not my go to. romione is my forever and always

IDK MAN. my image of hermione would never. whereas drarry isn't the same dynamic, they were written with (albeit unintentional) subtext and harry wasn't a hatstall as such but the hat debateddd slytherin yk? and also,,, draco doesn't call him a slur for years YKKKKK

anyway ahem. live laugh love. stopping now before i rant and go too far but if i were to engage in anti culture? it would be anti-dramione. which i don't because i simply block the dramione tags everywhere and move on with my day but yk. enrages me actually. i can't do it.

[directdogman]

Hey dogman, idk if you answered this

Who, out of both DSAF and Dialtown, was your favourite to write and/or create?

It's very hard for me to pick favourites with my characters because I don't tend to give characters a lot of screen-time unless I find a character interesting or fun to write. You've caught me in a talkative mood, so warning, there's an onslaught of text coming!

DSaF: Dave was the most fun to write for, as I remember it. I mean, the guy is the walking personification of chaos and even when he's being constructive (eg, rigging robots to do insane stuff), it's usually in a destructive capacity. Dave will do LITERALLY ANYTHING but contribute to society in meaningful/valuable ways.

In terms of what character-writing I was most 'proud' of, I was also pretty happy with Dr Henry Miller, as a villain. Namely the research he embarked on, described in his logs in DSaF 3 (which the fandom evidently agreed with, as I got really strong feedback on those logs.)

One issue a lot of people (including myself) have with canon William Afton is that he's this kind of mad scientist character but his research doesn't really seem to be... idk, going anywhere? Other than using remnant (soul nectar?) to make kids possess robots, it's kind of a mystery how he got to this point he did from running a bad fast food restaurant. William gets fleshed out motivations in TSE and even then, it mainly revolves around his relationship with Henry Emily, iirc. It's actually pretty accurate to how real serial killers think, imo, but there's a pretty wide berth between this kind of serial killer and becoming a sci-fi fast-food mad scientist... So, I decided to try to bridge that gap.

DSaF Henry's logs actually mention where the idea for his research came from, namely the fact that he existed in a world with normal scientific rules just like ours and seemingly discovered something supernatural, and he approaches it like an amoral scientist would - trying to figure out how to figure out more about the fabric of reality using the newly discovered phenomenon of possession. The 'joy of creation' phrase people pulled from Golden Freddy's phone call in FNaF 1 is given context - Henry is trying to find out what's on the other side (and eventually, how existence itself formed.)

There's other aspects to his character that make him more interesting too, like the implication that his research is partially an excuse for him to act on an underlying sadism (with scenes implying that he inflicts damage on others than can't be justified as assisting with his research.) His background as a dissident/quack laughing-stock scientist (thanks to pushing his soul theory in a best-selling book, which is considered pseudoscience) BEFORE he embarked on his journey to become a fast food tycoon also makes it less farfetch'd that he'd be capable of y'know, harvesting human souls intentionally to continue his research?

I had more for the character on paper that people haven't seen but some of it wasn't revealed due to it feeling a bit too disturbing to publish. None of the contents would've been all that controversial, more just too tonally disturbing when written about in detail (like a omitted part from his backstory/lore post where he managed to pick up a hazy audio of his wife + son's crying from the radio of the car his wife/son drowned in and reacted with genuine elation upon realizing he'd discovered a new scientific phenomenon (as this was the first time Henry witnessed soul-possession.)) Yeah.

I don't feel much of a need to revisit Henry as a character because as a series villain, he was pretty thoroughly-written and he did his job effectively... And his fate was well earned! (He even got an epilogue short-story a few years back, further cementing his fate!)

Dialtown: From the characters/writing that the fandom has seen? Tough to say. I genuinely really like every DT character. Gingi and Mayor Mingus are two of my favourite characters to write for because they're both really insistent and react to adversity in a really comically indignant way. Mingus is more like Gingi than she cares to admit in very specific ways, which is the core hypocrisy of her character - she's one of the most abnormal things IN Dialtown, and spends the game on a quest opposing abnormality that she, herself, can't stand.

Many absolute rulers have debilitating physical and/or mental cruxes and despite that, usually have the final say on what is/isn't okay, often guided by arbitrary preferences. It's funny to remember all of the ancient kings and emperors who dictated how others should act, talk and even think, when very many of them themselves were anything except a good reflection of their own subjects! It's an irony I quite enjoy and leads to a fun character to write for!

My favourite DT writing is probably some of my Callum Crown speech drafts. I have a definite bias here since Crown's character is based on many figures I've encountered in my own reading (and his story relates to topics I enjoy reading about.) A lot of that is real nerd shit that wouldn't be interesting to 99.9% of DT fans (like a long conversation where Crown + Milt discuss a campaign speech Milt wrote for Crown and they bicker about if the wording/arguments used are truly honest.) Again, not super relevant to Dialtown-proper, but it explains a lot about why the world of DT ended up the way it did.

Realistically, the story of Dialtown itself is basically a weird little epilogue to a story that ended decades upon decades ago, centered around a bunch of small-town nobodies circling around the carcass of the last surviving main character of the old story.

I'm also very happy with Gingi's character partially because I know more about Gingi's past/future than you guys do. Gingi has such rotten memory that Gingi's backstory before DT's story begins is basically a complete mystery. Thanks to Gingi never getting close enough to any humans before laying its eggs, there's nobody in Gingi's life that can fill in the gaps. Companionship means so much to Gingi because prior to meeting The Gang, Gingi is aware of a massive and unknown block of time that's a complete mystery precisely because Gingi had nobody in its life. To Gingi, this time was basically akin to being non-sentient or dead, and Gingi would never go back.

While I was making DSaF, I drafted a ton of other stories on paper. I considered making most of them, but decided not to for various reasons, despite getting some solid feedback from collaborators. Bits of almost all of those project ideas made it into DT, with Gingi having traits from several other main characters I prototyped years and years ago. This includes where Gingi came from and what exactly Gingi is. I don't want to mislead people into thinking Gingi is more important than it is, like Gingi is the key to unlocking DT lore (I promise there's a LOT of aimless scuttling/devouring in Gingi's past and relatively little else!) BUT: Of everything from those old scrapped projects, Gingi is what I decided deserved to survive the most. And that has to count for something.

One day I'd love to make sequels to DT and perhaps explore some of the stuff I've described above, like why the hell the world of DT is the way it is or maybe where the hell Gingi spawned from. Thanks

[unreadpoppy]

bg3, infographics, misogyny and you

Preface: this is a long ass post that I wrote some many weeks ago, and that because of some stuff I've seen, I'm compelled to finally post it. It's very like a spurn of the moment thing, not extremely well thoght out but I still think it's relevant.

.

Recently, a few people have posted some, in my opinion, really insightful infographics showing the difference in content to how many works (in AO3) there are to the female characters vs the male characters of BG3 and I've been thinking about how it relates to fandom in general, but also...everything.

As a quick rundown, what happens is: almost all of the female characters have a lot less content when compared to their male counterparts (at least writing wise). And I think this is a great moment to stop and think on why is that.

There's a lot of point to begin with but I want to begin with something larger and that is the society most of us are raised in. Obviously, I can't speak for everyone, but I think it's fair to say that most people grew up in places that had its fair share of sexism and give it or take, that does shape how we view the world.

I'll speak from my own experience. Even thought I had a mostly liberal upbriging, I went to a very conservative school and when I was growing up, I saw a lot of videos on youtube that anaylized media in what i can only describe as "god forbid women do anything". Video after video, I saw people commenting on how x female character was a mary sue, how she made no sense and ruined the plot, so many video essays on the """strong female character trope"""" that would end up just enforcing gender roles again. And I'll be honest, this DID affect how viewed female characters.

The best example I can give of this is with bg3 itself. There was one day that I stopped and realized that Minthara was the first time I ever obsessed over a fem character as much as any male character. And the second thought I had after this was 'oh my god why???'

Why did I always cater more to the male characters than I did to the female ones, when most of the times, I liked a lot as well?

I'd like to point out that I've seen the topic of "Most fic authors are cis straight women" being brought up a lot and frankly, I'm not the biggest fan of it. First, because I think it's overall a very...heteronormative way of seeing stuff and it's assuming a lot of stuff that puts a sour taste on my mouth (as a queer woman myself, I really don't like that implication but that's on me). Second, because saying that 'obviously women are going to write more about men' feels very...weird. Third, I just think that this argument fails to really question the why of it all and gives too simple an answer to something is anything but.

One can make the argument that these female characters are written differently than the men, and yes that is true and it's even historical (I wrote a whole project on the invisibility of women in theater through the ages and a lot of it has to do with how women were written, but that's a story for another time).

But I don't think that's true for all cases. It's easy to blame an imaginary writer's room than question that you might have internal biases.

Because at least it's what happened to me. I grew up hearing how female characters were inferior to the male characters and it affected how I viewed them. It's something I had to stop and reevalute and it led me to appreciate characters I once loathed.

And it sucks to realize that. It sucks to realize that even as a woman myself, I was not immune to commiting sexism, that I hadn't fully outgrown the shit I saw as a kid. Does that make me a bad person? No. You're not to blame for being raised in a way that leads you to have certain prejudices.

But it doesn't mean you can't do anything about it.

And no, the solution is not to suddenly go write a bunch of femslash. Because no one is saying that you should feel ashamed for writing more for men, or forcing you to like female characters. But, I ask you to do something much simpler.

Think on the why. Why, even when we love female characters, we don't show them as much love as we do to the male ones. Why we might feel more compelled to write for the men than for the women. Because sometimes it's questioning ourselves that we can find something about us we didn't know and change how we engage with media.

And you can brush this off as just fandom stuff, but I think it does, in some ways, also reflect a bit on how we act as whole as a society. Hell, writing this whole thing made me think of how the way I was raised still interferes with my own sexuality (which is a very personal topic for me to get on here but it was worth mentioning). What I'm trying to say is that sometimes something small is an easier way for us to understand the bigger, systemic issues around us.

I know that it sounds like there's nothing to be done cause fandoms have always been like this. But, personally, this sort of conformity to the norm causes more harm then good. Things won't change unless you decide to do something about it. And the good thing about fandom is that it's small enough that doing literally anything can create some impact than, I don't know, trying to solve big, real life societal issues.

This is getting long so I'm gonna try to wrap this up quickly. No one is shaming you if you write or obsesses more or even care more about male characters than you do female ones. I just ask you to think about it and be honest with yourself. Because then maybe, just maybe, next time you engage with another media, you might end up enjoying a female character much more and obsessing over them just as much.

[mariacallous]

‘I don’t like it when a comedian just spouts his own political views and relies on the audience agreeing with him to get a round of applause,’ announces Ricky Gervais in his new Netflix Special Armageddon. For 60-minutes Gervais, clad in his usual black t-shirt and jeans get-up, tells jokes about dwarfs, gay people, ‘disabled creatures’, African babies with AIDs, Chinese people eating dogs, people pretending to be asylum seekers, people pretending to have ADHD, students taking micky mouse degrees, Greta Thunberg, homeless people (‘fucking horrible’) and the fragile and narcissistic ‘woke’ youth. Which is to say that Gervais just spouts his own political views and relies on the audience agreeing with him to get a round of applause.

Gervais’s portrayal of David Brent in mockumentary The Office (2002) was a work of comic genius. Brent, a hapless white-collar middle manager who desperately wants to be popular, cuts a pathetic but ultimately sympathetic figure. The viewer didn’t so much hate Brent as feel sorry for him; he was an uncalibrated fool but a well meaning one, hence the happy ending written for him in the Christmas Specials that brought the curtain down on the story in 2003. Gervais foolishly resurrected Brent in 2016 for a feature length spin-off, Life on the Road (2016), this time without the grounding influence of his original co-writer on The Office Stephen Merchant. All of a sudden the charm had gone out of the franchise and Brent had morphed into something genuinely tragic and repulsive, trucking in boring jokes about gays and fat people.

Expressing any form of reservation or note of disapproval about anti-woke comedy nowadays is to get oneself marked down as an invertebrate. For those of us who possess a strong enough constitution to sit through jokes that poke fun at the shibboleths of political correctness - provided they are actually funny - retorts like this don’t hold much water. But I’ve come to realise that such humour is increasingly sustained by a section of the audience being reliably ‘offended’ by it and kicking off. How else to keep the lucrative conceit going which says that rich middle aged white men telling rollicking jokes about asylum seekers are heroic truth-tellers saying the unsayable? These days Gervais’s adoring fanbase seem more enthusiastic at the prospect of upsetting their political opponents than about the material itself. And who could blame them: most of the jokes in Armageddon are hackneyed and stale - ‘Doctor, Doctor, I keep thinking I’m a pair of curtains’; ‘You are then’. Heady stuff that is indeed guaranteed to ‘annoy all the right people’.

Netflix describes Armageddon as ‘controversial takes on political correctness and oversensitivity in a taboo-busting comedy special about the end of humanity’. Yet those on the receiving end of Gervais’s barbs are hardly considered off limits by the wider culture: illegal immigrants, the homeless and transgender people are all regularly subjected to invective from government politicians and Britain’s overwhelmingly right-wing media. By all means make an off-colour joke about those groups if you wish: I’m a big boy and I know how to use the remote control. But you won’t convince me that publicly flogging these tabloid bête noires makes one a gutsy truth teller. It’s true that a disability charity condemned Armageddon before it was released on Christmas Day for a joke Gervais makes about terminally ill children. But it’s also true that Gervais is still on Netflix telling the joke, which perhaps gives a good indication of just how risqué this style of humour really is.

One of the biggest cheers from the audience during Gervais’s performance in Armageddon erupts in response to a fatuous joke about mobs pulling down statues originally put up to honour slave traders - another example of woke hypocrisy apparently. ‘He was a slave trader, pull down the fucking statue.’ ‘He built the hospital, should we pull that down too?’ ‘No, leave the hospital’. It’s certainly true that wealthy people have historically (and not just historically) tried to launder their reputations through philanthropy (and on this note Gervais enjoys boasting about how wealthy he is and how much money he donates to animals, who he prefers to humans). But you needn’t take a course in critical race theory to recognise that those who became uncontrollably rich from the slave trade might have set aside some of their tainted money for similar ends. ‘Pride and vanity have built more hospitals than all the virtues together,’ wrote the Dutch physician Bernard de Mandeville in The Fable of the Bees, his eighteenth century polemic against philanthropic hypocrisy.

It isn’t for me to tell a comedian who the ‘correct’ target of his humour ought to be - comedy is subjective after all. But then Gervais’s current shtick is of a piece with right-wing populism more generally, characterised as it is by a servility to the very power it ostensibly rails against. I’m no more required to accept Gervais’s assessment of himself as a brave heretic saying the unsayable than I am obliged to join in with the hysterical blue pencil-wielding critics who really do want to see him cancelled. As to who is currently coming out on top, Armageddon is apparently the highest grossing single stand-up performance ever, bringing in £1,410,000 for a recent show at the Hollywood Bowl in Los Angeles. Cancel culture indeed.

At one time conservatives and reactionaries would doggedly stand athwart history yelling Stop. Nowadays they need constant reassurance that they are still the plucky countercultural underdogs they imagined themselves to be in the halcyon days of their youth. Which is understandable I suppose. Nobody wants to be the angry young man whose waistband has inexorably expanded along with his list of blimpish grievances. ‘I think I am woke, but I think that word has changed,’ says Gervais. In other words it’s not him, it’s us. ‘No-one likes a white middle aged man anymore,’ laments Gervais at another point in the show. I’ve heard that one before too.

I used to enjoy Ricky Gervais but when I think of him today I always imagine some braying face demanding to know how ‘triggered’ I am by something puerile he’s said. This ‘type’ is seemingly ubiquitous at the moment: everything is geared toward getting a rise out of the libs and sticking it to the man in a way that doesn’t threaten one’s status as a servant of power (am I still allowed to say “man”? hehe - you get the gist).

The role of humour according to Gervais is ‘to laugh at bad shit to get us through it’. Which isn’t a terrible definition, though I suppose it depends on what one considers the ‘bad shit’ to be. I found much of the material in Armageddon indistinguishable from the endless bleating we hear in some quarters about the country going to the dawgs because of foreigners and queers and the young with their trendy ailments and political correctness et cetera. I can’t say I feel hysterical or offended by jokes about that stuff - soporific is more the word that springs to mind. Perhaps I should just be grateful that Gervais didn’t make an ‘Orange man bad’ joke. Maybe he’s saving those gags for his next Netflix Special when Donald Trump is President of the United States again. Important to laugh at the truly bad shit first though right.

[zagreus-eats-your-bread]

Okay once again it's 2am but I need to talk about the Space Odyssey series. So first of all we all agree the series is about space exploration, right?

It's often been critisized for having flat characters or too many characters, but what really comes out strong every time is cool space facts and poetic descriptions. Clarke pretty much says this when he stated that the data gathered by Voyager 1 was an inspiration for 2010 and the data gathered from Halley's Comet inspired 2061. So gathering scientific knowledge about space is pretty much the driving factor, as well as the mystery of the monoliths of course.

Starting with 2001, the whole point of the movie and the tragic story of the Discovery was to show how human mistrust interferes with space exploration and science. The paranoia and secrecy of politics was just not something that HAL 9000 as a computer could deal with in the same way a human might, so he freaked. It's tragic because it's avoidable and unnecessary as well, since it stems entirely from politics that were holding back scientists in real life at the same time the story was written, while cheering them on to allow ones own nation to be 'the first' to do something, rather than gaining knowledge for the good of all humanity. We agree on that, right?

2010, to a degree, and 2061 are just the same. The Tsien was built and sent out in complete secrecy and there is an obvious contest between the scientists of different nations. The movie has more of a cold war vibe but I'm sure everyone knows what I'm getting at here.

2061 is more obvious in following my little red line. Due to the political value of diamonds, a mission is risked to land on Europa, despite this being forbidden and dangerous.

Now, in 3001 there is no such conflict. It's described as a Utopia that prioritizes scientific knowledge and space exploration. Religion is no more because we are all just too crazy about finding facts and Relgion can't be proven / is disproven.

The entire population of mankind is assessed by their brain caps and great minds are basically sent to the top automatically. Undesirables are seperated from larger society and criminals are mind controled slaves for a few years. A society of efficiency. Even Frank Poole, who is weirdly cool with all of this and more, admits that most people seem rather bland and there are few who have much of a big personality. He believes that humanity has grown up, when he notices that no one wants to prove themselves and works rather toward an efficient solution for the good of everyone.

This terrifying Dystopia — I mean cool and sick Utopia, great job Arthur — works efficiently. It uses technology that is deemed "necessary" to categorize all humans and no one can opt out of this because you need it to go everywhere. It is a technology that technically gives the government complete control over your brain. Most importantly, though I am repeating myself, there is no frivilous political conflict holding humanity back from exploring and modifying space to their needs.

This is essentially humanity ascending slowly to a level that the creators of the monolith technology once occupied. Humanity is slowly ascending to godhood by becoming coldly efficient and scientific. Even the one philospher we meet is just mostly preaching antitheism (in an age where there is no religion. let it go man. you are mister status quo, you're not radical) and that cold fact prevails over faith.

This is going into my personal feelings about the monoliths but I think they are fucking terrifying. There certainly is a romance in aliens not unlike us wanting to create people like it wherever it went. But the horror aspect is clearly not unintentional.

It makes me wonder, what exactly is humanity aspiring to, then? A sort of absolute evolution that includes the absolute morality of manipulating life to fit ones own values? Of commiting genocide where one deems the lifeforms not worthy enough to create a species more to ones liking (destroying Jupiters life forms to ensure Europa could have a permanent chance of life and the ultimate good of "Mind" could be born there)? Of destroying star systems of the conscious species you create that don't turn out exactly the way you like them to? That's fucking terrifying.

I'm sure it's not really intentional but I can't help but see a similarity between the defective monolith humanity is destroying to save itself and its own form of governing itself. Cold efficiency. Fact over emotion.

This is attributed to entropy by 3001, but the monoliths make plenty of mistakes. Not all of their experiments work out. But when they make mistakes it has effects on a massive scale and destroys uncountable lives. Quite literally they are playing God, or they are tools of Gods that have since fucked off to cosmic background radiation (? i'm not sure if the creators are involved at all anymore. all the books are so contradictory).

Humanity learns to shape the Solar system in its image and colonize its worlds. "All these worlds are yours". It's playing God and doing so unaided by dramatic politics and cultural hangups. It just makes me wonder, looking upon the work of the monoliths, whether ascending to Godhood would really be a good thing and something to aspire to.

[olivieblake]

I know it's SO silly to avoid posting spoilers on a fic that was written almost a decade ago but @wonniesverse asked about what happens in chapter 35 or 36 or whatever of Marked (you know the one) and I am putting my answer under the cut!!! it's unfortunately kind of a short answer lol

hi! i am so sorry if i've got the wrong account but i had just recently read the clean and marked dramione series you wrote on ao3, and i was genuinely FLOORED. yep it's me lol this was the first fic i had ever genuinely cried for, the way you expressed hermione's and draco's relationship so well. the fic was written so long ago - in 2016 - and you might have forgotten about it, ahahahah pls but i had one question i simply couldn't ignore for the life of me: when snape used the time turner, he went to another parallel universe, right?

sorry to interrupt you here, but no! he used the time turner to go back in time, within the same universe, in a time loop. as with the events of book 3, there is still only one universe and only one timeline—there are briefly two harrys and two hermiones in the book because they're the ones who used the time-turner, but in this case, only snape went back, so he's the only one who is experiencing both the current timeline and the rewritten past.

so the new universe's hermione and draco could feel the phantom original universe's draco and hermione's experiences, so the original universe must still have been existing and operating alongside the new parallel one, meaning that the original hermione and draco were still there (please correct me if i'm wrong!).

so again, there is only one timeline, but them being able to feel the echoes of other decisions and other lives was meant to be sort of ineffable. magic!!! etc etc

but i was wondering, if that was a separate timeline, what happened to the original universe's draco and hermione if they still existed? i know draco died in the original universe, but i was curious how the original universe's hermione (master of death) lived after that, and if she ever found joy again, or if she only talked to the ghost of draco forever, and i also wonder how theo fared in that original timeline. there are so many other questions i'd like to ask, but i'll keep this as short as i can.

I made a joke in this week's not writing video that the oversaturation of multiverse media has led to some confusion so yeah, the timeline is disrupted and written over, like—oops maybe this is too Aged a reference—but it's like when you record over an existing VHS and the original footage is simply lost. but there is also the concept of a palimpsest, which is what I wanted those echoes of another life to feel like

as for what would have happened if that timeline continued: what the story suggests (the reason snape went back to begin with) is that the timeline is hopeless—draco is dead and can't be resurrected, hermione maybe never moves on, she allows absolute power to corrupt her absolutely. but that was the point of the story, that the pressure point that re-starts the time loop each time is that draco dies and everything goes irreparably wrong from there. you are of course welcome to reimagine something else! but that was the point of writing a story that resets to canon; I was trying to resolve and explain all the places where something doesn't make sense, like whenever an adult makes a terrible and illogical decision

the way that you wrote of hermione's heartbreak truly tore me apart, and i cried unabashedly when i saw draco died. draco loved her so much and she loved him, so to kill one of them would be utter torture, and i hope the original hermione got to find peace or at the very least see draco in the afterlife. theo was so strong too - even though he wished he could be selfish and talk to draco too, he knew he couldn't take even the ghost of draco away from hermione, so he gave up his chance. i cannot even begin to describe how this story broke my heart and mended it again, and i'm happy that at least the hermione and draco in the other parallel universe got their happy ending, but i also worry about the original hermione and draco too. if you've read until here, thank you so so much for just indulging and entertaining this silly question of mine, and i wholly understand if you don't feel like reading this question anymore. nonetheless, regardless of if you read or reply to this message, i just wanted to let you know that this series was truly of the best i have ever read, and i thank you so so much for that. again, if this is the wrong account, i apologize! but the fic was written in 2016, and the author said this was her tumblr account, so i found the best match i could <3

hahahaah it's so funny to me that you would have any doubt that this was me... I still pretty much write endings that people get mad

but thank you so much for caring this much about the story and I'm so glad you enjoyed it!!

[the-confessions-of-a-fangirl]

Buck Season 8 Storyline

Season 7 started off strong for Buck with the way his bisexual realization was written. The confusion, the 'overenthusiastic-ally-to-queer,' over-compensating with the heterosexual behavior because you're not ready to be out.

But after that Buck was, once again, shoved into a relationship with someone who wouldn't treat him well and was given no further storyline beyond that. Even Maddie and Chimney, who didn't get overarching storylines like Henren, Bathena ,and Eddie, at least had one episode storylines and made an impact in the story during the finale (fostering Mara till Henren could finally officially adopt her).

It got me thinking on what kind of storyline Buck could have in season 8. It has to be something that touches on his family (118) and romantic relationships (they can't be side-lined at this point) but it has to be something wholly about him.

Then I remembered season 4. In season 4, we see that Buck started seeing a Dr. Copeland because he had issues about feeling 'sad and lonely' and feeling like he can't trust it (4x03). Even after he got closure from Abby which was the only lingering relationship issue at the time, he still felt sad and lonely.

This means that it's an internal thing that is making him feel sad and lonely, not an external relationship. And afterwards we see that this loneliness stems from his childhood in a family with neglectful parents and a sister, who loved him so much, but was caught up in a terrible situation to be around.

But there was another aspect that we learned from his childhood. His 'reckless' , 'dive in head first' attitude was a learned behaviour. He taught himself that being in pain=getting attention from his parents and this escalated to a point where he got in a motorcycle accident. As these incidents escalated, he would have to do weigh the fact that he could get really hurt (or worse) and then go 'that's not as important as the possibility of surviving and his parents showing him a smidge of attention'

That is textbook self-destructive behaviour wrapped up in this need for attention and love. He needs this attention because otherwise he doesn't feel enough for his parent's affection. And how long can a kid grow up like that before he internalizes that?

This lack of self worth is seen in 4x05 when he calls himself 'defective parts' and when Eddie combats that by saying 'its not on you' he combats it not by saying he doesn't think that but that his parents do think of it like that. He isn't saying 'I know I'm not defective' but that 'this situation isn't about me' when it clearly is. It personally speaks to me about low self-worth, that even when he is talking about himself, its through the way other people describe him.

He also has a huge tendency to intellectualize his traumas rather than confront them. Refer to Buck 1.0, 2.0 and 3.0. Instead of processing the fact that his parents lied to him for years, he just says he's a new person because his parent's agreed to family therapy with him. He hasn't even dealt with his emotions yet and he's already packing the trauma in a box to keep away. Even his bisexual arc follows this, he may logically understand that he is bisexual but then he immediately jumped into something without trying to process what that means to him because he just won't think about himself without a buffer of another person.

So we see that Buck tends to feel lonely even when he is surrounded by meaningful relationships (Taylor in 4x08), he has self destructive habits and a lack of self worth. We also see that whenever it comes to him processing or letting himself feel his emotions, he'd rather focus on something else (he finally realizes it is over with Abby; he worries about not being a manwhore like Buck 1.0, his family lied to him; he'd rather focus on the fact that he is getting family therapy and try to find someone romantic, when Eddie is shot and he's asked about it; he'd rather worry about the team and climb up a crane where chances are he could be shot)

I want to take all of this and put it in a storyline for Buck where he learns that he only looks for a romantic partner, no matter who they are, because he wants to avoid being alone with his negative thoughts about himself or what he has been through like the ladder, his parents, dying, being lied to by Maddie, seeing Eddie get shot. The sad and lonely part of him that he keeps trying to put away with any romantic partner that comes his way is not because he lacks romance or love of any kind, but because he is unable to be happy with just himself. Buck doesn't like himself, he's constantly looking for an external change for something internal to him that he doesn't even try to think about and that is self-destructive.

Because the only external change he can think of is tossing himself into any relationship he has the opportunity of being in without thinking about whether that person is good for him. Abby didn't want a serious relationship, he barely got a chance to be meaningful with Ali, Taylor has behaved poorly in regards to his family (118) and Tommy is overall very dismissive of Buck as a person.

And when these relationships end, he feels even more poorly about himself, because he has always thought of any issue in a relationship being his fault because why wouldn't it be?

Buck has serious self worth issues that he needs to learn how to process and learn to like who he is and I hope season 8 will do that.

[kichikichiko]

Accepting the loss of your animal companion

A/N: hey everyone! I originally wanted to make this as animal friendly ad possible (meaning u could put in animal you want while u read) but there are so many different types of pets ranging for furry creatures or those who shed skin so it was so hard my bad :((

The Tighnari part of this headcanon is for all but written specifically for @hitomisuzuya , Suzu I hope you know that youre not alone and you should never ever put the blame of loosing Frank on yourself. Was never your fault and never will be. ALSO IDK HOW TO DESCRIBE A HORSE SO PLS EVERYONE EXCUSE ME 😭

Anyways enjoy reading everyone!!

Tighnari, Kazuha and Thoma (seperate) x gen neutral! Reader, loss of a pet, comfort, fluff, headcanon, Cat for Kazuha, Dog for Thoma and horse for Tighnari, Tighnari was mostly targeted at Suzu, sort of proofread

♡♡♡♡

Tighnari ▪︎ verdant strider

Tighnari and you decided to visit mondstadt one day

Mainly because windblume was coming up and Collei wanted to see Amber again

The 3 of you had such a blast! It has been a while since the 2 of you have visited other nations so this was a well deserved break

Drank together, ate different dishes the city of freedom had to offer together, and made new friends

One day you met the calvary captain of the knights of favonuis while Tighnari was talking to Albedo

The conversation between the 2 of you shifted from work to animals to his title as the calvary captain

"Most of our horses have been taken in by Grandmaster Varka for his expedition however we still have around a few left here in the city just in case we need them" the captain started, "would you like to see them?"

You hesitated, a part of you didnt want to at all. You were afraid you'd break down and start remembering the past

But a part of you also wanted to, you longed to see another horse again

You longed to appreciate the way they strut, the way their mane flows when they jump, the way they look at you when you were getting ready for another competition together

Although their expression was overall the same, when you have a bond with a horse especially a strong one, their emotions as well as yours felt like they were connected

But youve avoided them like the plague

Regretfully, you said yes anyways

Your heart has won against your mind this time around

After a while the sun was about to go down and everyone was getting ready to call it a day

Tighnari and you left Collei with Amber so you both made your way to the inn youre staying at

The walk home was silent and you were staring down at your feet, and you seemed to be in a daze,

You gaze was empty, and there wasnt any hint of sparkle in your eyes

Tighnari noticed something was off so he asked

"Hey are you alright?"

"What? Oh. Uh yeah Im fine" you nodded half heartedly after his sudden question taking you off your train of thoughts

The fox stopped on his track and held your hand

"No something is off, you never look up when youre upset. Tell me whats wrong sunflower, Im here for you"

Your back was still facing him, but he could see your shoulders starting to shake, and you trying to muffle up sobs

You hated crying about this especially in public

You didnt want to remember

Never again

His ears perked up and swiftly he pulled you in for a hug

Before he got the chance to say something, you started

"Horses... I miss my horse Nari. I fucking miss him so much" you started, choking up sobs

"I miss him everyday and when I saw the horses before with Kaeya one of them looked like him and..."

You hid your face in his chest as your sobs started getting louder by the minute

"One of them looked exactly like him. I can't I regret that I wasnt able to save him Nari, Im such a bad companion. I could have done more, I could have SAVED him but I-"

"Hey! (Name)! Thats not true" he cutted you off before you finished your sentence, you were having an episode and it broke him to see you like this

Gently, he took your chin and made you face him

"He would never blame you for what happened. It was out of your control, he is your companion. He would have never placed the blame on you sunflower. It all happened too fast, please believe me when I say this, its not your fault"

You couldnt help but let more tears fall out

Yes you were still upset you lost your dearest companion

But you were also happy to hear those words come out of his mouth

You both stood in the middle of the road hugging for a while, waiting until you calmed down.

You knew it wasnt your fault that your beloved horse was gone, but Tighnari was right

He was always right

Your companion would never have blamed you for what happened to him

You wanted to be around horses again

But realise that the first step to finally be around them comfortably was to be able to accept and heal

And Tighnari will be with you every step of the way

KAZUHA ▪︎ Scarlet Leaves Pursue Wild Waves

You were with Kazuha relaxing together outside enjoying the fresh air

The sun was out bright in Liyue so you both decided to take a stroll before setting out to the sea again on the crux

At some point during your stroll a cat came to you and meowed

You stopped on your feet and looked down to see the cat starting to rub on you affectionatley

You of course bent down to give em some pets

Kazuha realised you werent on his side anymore and looked behind to see you gazing sotfly at the cat while playing with it

He cant help but think you looked cute

He walked towards you and bent down to the same level as you and watched you play with the cat

You broke the silence after a while

"I use to have a cat" still not breaking your gaze away from the cat

Kazuha looked up at you "oh really?"

"Mmhm, (gender) was beautiful, had lushious (colour) fur, ears so cute you could bite em off and eyes that when you stare at them for long enough, you could find yourself falling in love with (gender) again" subconsciously smiling when you said that

You missed your cat truly

They were your best friend

The ronin hesitated for a bit, not sure if he should ask the question that came up on his head

Without him asking you knew what was on his mind

"(Name) passed away not long ago. I was very sad. In fact, I would be lying if I said Ive healed completely" you chuckled, finally looking up at Kazuha smiling a bit

You didnt want to think about negative thoughts when talking about your beloved cat

Because you'd just have a breakdown

Besides, you knew (name) was at peace anyways now

Kazuha stared at you for a while before smiling "Im sure (name) is resting well now, and if (name) was still here Im sure (gender)'d would love all the different places youre seeing right now on your journey"

You laughed "oh almost, I dont think (gender)'d like Sumeru's desert, (name) would make it visibly clear how much (gender)'d hate it"

You both played with the stray cat for another 5 minutes while talking about your cat until the stray finally left

Kazuha would like to raise a kitten with you

So you both could make new memories together

And for him to see the bond grow between you and their future kitten

Thoma ▪︎ Protector from afar

Everytime you both went out together there was one time you'd miss playing with the stray dogs and cats out

Especially stray dogs

You have special attention to them

Whenever Thoma was knitting something for the stray cats you'd request he made one for the dogs as well

Whenever he was going out to feed the dogs and cats you'd always remind him to feed the dogs as well

You loved being around them and they seem to as well

He was in awe with how much bond and trust was between you and the dogs

Its almost as if you have one yourself

He had brought up wanting to raise a puppy with ypu, or adopt one of the stray dogs

But everytime he asked youd politely decline saying you werent interested

He was confused and shocked obviously

I mean you clearly loved the stray dogs so why didnt you want to adopt one?

He had to find out

You were getting ready for bed one night looking at the mirror while brushing your hair when he asked you laying on a futon (youre visiting him)

"Hey love, Ive been meaning to ask you something"

He only continued when you hummed, curious to what he wanted to ask

"Oh its just, I wanna know why you keep rejecting the offer of raising a puppy together or adopting one of the stray dogs. I mean you have such a tight bond with the dogs and you seem to favour them.. I must admit I was a little shocked when you rejected. Oh but Im not forcing you to say yes to my suggestion, if you dont wanna then thats fine its just-" he stopped talking when he saw you facing him

Your face was a little hesitant and your brows were furrowed a bit.

He could tell you were debating wheather or not you wanna tell him

"Oh but if you dont wanna tell me thats okay too love" kinda panicked a bit worried if he asked you a personal question 😭

You chuckled reassuring him it was alright

"No no Thoma its not that, its just.." you trailed off again trying to find the right words

"Im sorry for rejecting your suggestion for raising a puppy together, I think its a wonderful idea but im not ready."

He was about to say something before you continued "I had a dog once (gender) was a (breed of dog), and I named em (name)" you smiled at him, but one thing he noticed was that your smile didnt reach your eyes

"I lost (name) a few (weeks/months/years) ago. Ive been wanting to adopt another dog after (name)... but I just cant. I feel like Im replacing (gender)"

Thoma was mentally kicking and punching himself rn

How could he be so stupid

Of course this was obviously the reason why you rejected his suggestion

He wanted to apologise for asking but he knew you'd bash him and tell him not to apologise

Instead, he decided to get up from the futon and place a kiss on your forehead "could you... tell me more about (name)?"

You smiled and nodded

He always knew how to make you smile

Maybe one day when youre ready, you'll both raise a puppy together like a family

♡♡♡♡

[starbiex]

evajacks kiss hint in ouabh??

So I was re-reading OUABH and there is no way this isn't a hint to the evajacks kiss we'll probably see in ACFTL!!

This scene is written with so much more detail than the previous description and introduction of kiss chess, there's no way it isn't a clue to something! I'd think that the whole description about the girl's trembling hands and the boy being nervous would usually be cut out UNLESS it is important 👀

NOTE: this is a long post, and there's a bit of rambling, but I promise I have a point!!!

the young woman in a paper crown

Hmmm... paper crown? First off, Eva is a princess, so the crown definitely makes sense and would suit her. Paper? On one hand, it's probably because it's kiss chess and it's just a board game, so it being just paper would suit the "game" vibe. But a part of me also thinks that it's more special than just for fitting the vibe of the game, I don't have a strong theory for this part but I do think it has something to do with Apollo, or maybe they get a divorce so she's no longer a real princess, or Prince of Hearts x Eva = Princess symbolism. Probably getting offtrack with this one but I know it means something, I just don't know for certain what it is HAHA

standing on her tiptoes to kiss

THIS ONE!!! I didn't realise this one as quickly as I did the others, but this is such a big clue!! In TBONA, when Eva would kiss Luc's cheek, it would describe how she tiptoes to do that. We already know that Jacks is taller than Eva since she has to tilt her head up to look at him when they're close, so it would make sense that she'd have to tiptoe to kiss Jacks a well!! I thought the tiptoeing was just cute and sweet in TBONA, but now I think it's one big clue that leads back to this part in OUABH!!!!

tall young man (in a black bishop's cape)

This one is pretty self-explanatory I think, Jacks is a tall young man, or at least taller than Eva by quite a bit. Agh! I don't have much on the black bishop's cape but I, again, feel like this would be important, or else it would'nt've been mentioned at all! Maybe the black cape could've gone by just fine, but why bishop's cape??

The girl's hands were trembling, but her cheeks were flushed with excitement

Maybe before the kiss, something big happens? like a fight?? she gets her memories back??? I'm not sure, maybe she's just really excited/nervous! Eva's always big on blushing and of course she'd be excited about the kiss!

and the boy appeared almost as nervous. He stood completely still. 

There are a lot of possibilities when it comes to what's happening in / what happened before the supposed kissing scene. Maybe Jacks knew at this point that the kiss wouldn't kill Eva? But, obviously, whatever it is, he's uncertain about the kiss. After restraining himself for letting a kiss happen between him and Eva for the basically the entirety of the two books, I do think that it's unlikely he would be the one to go for the kiss first, whether he know it's safe or not, so I think him standing still for it makes sense!

Evangeline couldn’t tell if he was afraid of the kiss or afraid that the girl might change her mind.

Ok, this sentence!! I think this is a huge one, personally. This most definitely sounds like something Jacks would think, especially after TBONA. Again, maybe Jacks knows at this point that the kiss wouldn't kill Eva, but he'd definitely still be afraid that it would. For the second part, I think this would definitely apply to Jack's mindset for Eva, especially after what happened at the end of the Hollow scenes. His feelings for Eva basically got rejected when she told him it was all because of the stone, and it was shown that this really affected him afterwards.

There are just so many possibilities for this potential scene! How would they know that the kiss would be safe? And how does Jacks believe in this strongly enough to not back away from it?

I have so many thoughts about this that I just can't really put into words, but feel free to build onto my ideas! <3

(also i had this drafted months ago but never posted it bcos life got in the way but im coming back to share this bcos i genuinely think this is huge :D)

[samuelroukin]

twenty questions for fic writers!

tagged by @meyerlansky thank you 🙏

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

18..

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

294,445

3. what fandoms do you write for?

right now just cod 😔 i gotta write the third turn fic but the brainrot is strong

4. top five fics by kudos

limerence (i'll be your animal)

no face, no case

baptized in gunpowder

bliss in suffering

bite (this is war)

5. do you respond to comments?

sometimes it takes me a while bc i get Anxiety but i try to respond to all of them, it means so much that someone would take the time and i'd feel horrible not at least saying thanks

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably and i'm glad the world is ending bc well. nothing like knocking out the guy you just had weird sex with to make your escape.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

genuinely couldn't pick one, i think they all end on a pretty happy note? i don't always resolve Everything but i leave them in a spot where they can work out the details later if necessary lol

8. do you get hate on fics?

not to my face! i can think of a million reasons why i would, but everyone's been really niceys

9. do you write smut?

me??? write smut?? never.

10. craziest crossover:

i don't have any, and they're not really something i'm interested in so i'm unlikely to ever write one

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

i don't think so, i'm not a big name author so unless it's just ai scraping i don't think anyone would bother

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

nope, not as far as i know! i do have one reader that used google translate bc they don't speak english tho

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope, most i've done is discuss ideas and Options which is really fun, but i don't think actual co-writing is for me

14. all time favorite ship?

i don't think any ship i've liked has ever had the grip on me that soapghost has 💀

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

at this point it's looking like part three of the simleb fics but i WILL get to it. i will. i can't abandon my boys. there's also the one with gaz overhearing soapghost and relaying the details to price which i still like but it needs Something and i couldn't put my finger on it

16. what are your writing strengths?

smut. i think i'm alright at setting tone as well, and i like to think i'm ok at building up tension

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i'm terrible at dialogue and pacing. set descriptions too, i never know how much detail to put in vs letting readers fill in the blanks. i also don't really know how to describe it but i feel like my fics read less like a book and more like a script. and i get pointlessly, annoyingly wordy to say something that could be said in like two sentences lmao. add to that abuse and misuse of punctuation marks and it really is a mess lmao

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

i don't like it generally speaking unless it's a word or two. i've used it once or twice tho dkjfhjkhst. it depends on the Why i guess, but if they're speaking another language together (as in one or more characters understand what's being said) i think it's better to be like 'he switched to dutch' and then use italics to go "Okay, this is what's happening, don't let them catch on." instead of writing the language

19. first fandom you wrote in?

i think it was death note? maybe something for a band before that, i'm not sure tbh

20. favorite fic you've written?

miannach my beloved 🙏 it's not perfect but i had a lot of fun with the magic and the crack taken seriously while still also being a little funny, plus it has one of my fave smut scenes i've written

tagging @bayonettotheheart @brotherdusk @meduseld @c4tto626 @ferindencadash only if u want ofc 🫡

[ceofjohnlennon]

Apologies for the tough question; feel absolutely free to completely ignore this if that is a topic tough to address. I am a groupie and absolutely love John, and when I go on Tumblr, just can't avoid any MCLN posts. Most of the time on that ship, John is described only as some paranoid man who's always lusting after P, and is aggressive and causes trouble only because of obsessive romantic feelings towards him. He doesn't have value or depth in any other way, which is very constraining to see how materials are collected and interpreted; the interpretation seems to be led by some kind of biased view. I've even come across some saying their posts aren't fiction but opinions when RPF is used. This ship appears to have an impact even on other platforms like Reddit, which deeply discourages me. At the same time, I fear such twisted interpretations about John becoming popular. What kind of mindset should I hold regarding this as a lover of John? I will now appreciate hearing from you.

Hello! Don't worry, there is no topic that I don't like to comment on. I believe that by talking we can understand each other or create more possibilities in some thoughts. ❤️

I understand where you're coming from. You're afraid that people will end up mixing what they THINK they know about John and create in their writing with reality. I'll be honest when I say that I think this is a real problem. Unfortunately, parasocial relationships among fans are more common than we like to admit, and many people think that knowing a lot about an artist or "studying" them means that you know them like you know a close relative. We should always keep in mind that we can read 1,000 books about X person, watch 500 videos a week, and so on, but if we don't have daily contact with them, we don't know them 100%. Imagine a person who's already gone? The possibility becomes zero.

I believe that sometimes people may be projecting something personal about themselves onto this John they write about and that is a danger, but the only way to combat that is to always share what we can about John, the truths we have and the facts we believe in as fans, remembering: Facts, not theories or "I think" as facts.

What I know, that is, what I can say, is that from the sources we have, spoken and written, John was in fact very jealous (he himself admits this, right?), but this was due to his insecurity and his trauma of abandonment that followed him until the end, but with Yoko this was dampened to the point that even though people brought up the possibility that Yoko could have had other lovers back in the late 70s and 1980, John said that she could. With Paul, John also had a certain attachment that was too strong, so much so that we have the case of him ripping clothes off a girl Paul was seeing, being kind of an idiot with Jane and never making good comments about Linda, Dot being the only girlfriend of Paul that John liked. But we cannot ignore that Paul was also somewhat jealous of John too. Well, they were complicated lol.

We can't change everything, so many people will continue to have an erroneous and/or strange image of John and the way to combat this is, as I said, sharing what we can know about him: from people who knew him and through his own words . Of course, also, on a certain level, saying or thinking that John is A or B even though we're trying not to assume anything is also a bit of a feeling of false intimacy since we've never met him either, but always trying to remain as close to respectful as possible with who he was is the best thing to do.

[arale2126]

Cherik 「Jean-acquisition」 fic list

Went over my Pocket List and here is the list of dads!Cherik and Jean as their daughter.

For those who want to skip my personal ramblings: my absolute top top top favorites [one] [two] [three] [four]

— turning tables

I didn't even mean to search for Cherik fics at the time as I don't even ship them. The ship was huge so I had always knew of them and enjoyed watching people going crazy over them for more than a decade but I didn't get deep into the fandom or anything. Until that very fateful night. I was knee deep in Grindeldore feels for unknown reasons (still am, btw) and got a huge urge to read Dumbledore using legilimency to soothe his crying daughter. Being not the top ship as Grindeldore was, there simply wasn't any fic that fit the criteria. And what did I do? Searched the Cherik tag, obviously. It was just a logical shortcut: what telepath with kids wouldn't do that? Stayed up until 2am to finish the entire thing and the rest was history. The idea of Cherik with wee!Jean had taken root like the most normal thing on Earth.

— An Earlier Heaven

Pre-DOFP so Erik is characterized as only borderline-abusive instead of, you know, full blown, Charles-need-to-file-a-restraining-order-against-his-ex-who-is-incapable-of-being-anything-but-angry kind of abusiveness.

— Red Riding Hood | 5 times Jean said something embarrassing + 1 she didn't

pure chaos wee!Jean crack and two very embarrassed and exasperated dads

— Looking Forwards (Backwards)

grown-up!Jean reminisces about growing up with Charles and Erik as she fills in for all the history that Logan has missed after DOFP. I wish it was longer because it's so sweet and warms my heart.

— Four times Erik was called dad and one time he was called husband

fluff domestic ASMR basically

— Rest of their Lives

Prompt from Mnemo_ink: After Jean destroys Vuk by letting the Phoenix force free, the light descends back on Earth and envelops Charles. When the light fades away, Charles has a baby in his arms: it's Jean. I can't describe how much I love this idea. It's a cultural thing, I think. There is a notion that if the bond between people are strong enough, it would continue lives after lives. Whatever you incarnates into in the next life, in one way or another, you would find a way to be back together again and again. This prompt reflects that idea really well. Of billions others on Earth, once again, Charles is chosen. He is forgiven. He gets a chance at redemption, to be a father again. It is just indescribably beautiful to me.

— To Love and Be Loved

👌🏼👏🏼😫 have to use emojis because i'm lost for words at how *chef kiss this is. It's domestic fluff on steroid strapped to a rocket. 「 of course erik would give the kids little metal tokens so he could always sense them--and there is some COMPLICATED meta to be written here about how charles's wheelchair binds them together too 」

— For I Mean to Conquer Troy

This fic purifies my heart and ascends me. It's like I'm wrapped around by warm comfort and soothing lullabies. You know how in First Class Charles tells Erik "There is good, too. I felt it." That is the Erik in this fic, the characterization that is grossly overlooked, I dare say. And the author predicts who he could be in Apocalypse in 2011 as well. 👏🏼

[runwayrunway]

No. 38 - SriLankan Airlines (Air Lanka)

Thank you to anon for requesting SriLankan Airlines! This was a lot more interesting of an airline to talk about than I expected.

To begin with, take a look at that logo. I love that. The stylized bird looks fantastic and the typeface really matches it well. This is good.

But I will talk more about the logo in a bit. Let's talk about the planes they fly.

A gay plane has...taken off?

And in the process reflect on planes of years past.

An old plane has also taken off.

SriLankan Airlines, which was known as Air Lanka from its establishment in 1979 until 1998, is the second flag carrier of Sri Lanka. It was launched after the demise of former flag carrier Air Ceylon as a fully government-owned company. Though it was briefly partially privatised, it is now re-nationalised. There are apparently plans to potentially re-privatise it, but we will see. They're very recently announced and tentative.

Based on the wording of anon's ask, I get the sense they want me to specifically talk about Air Lanka, and to be totally honest I think I would be doing the airline a huge disservice if I didn't.

I can't read Sinhalese or Tamil, which impacts my ability to really fully understand the apparently quite eventful history of the airline. There are a few op-eds in English written for Sri Lankan publications, but as I'm not the intended audience I would need to research a lot of context before I could really understand much of it. It's a shame, because I am now curious about this.

Thankfully images transcend language, so I can understand how its livery has developed over time. Well, 'developed' is sort of a strong word. They had one livery, and then they had another. They really don't like to switch up their liveries every ten years how many airlines do, and I actually really respect that. Don't get rid of something good if you don't need to.

But was it good?

I never really thought about the landing gear on the L-1011. It feels like it's located so far back. Is it similar to the Trident's sideways gear to leave space for its massive electronics bay that it used to autoland? Also, that's not that many wheels for a plane that big.

This livery looks sort of standard for something invented in 1979, but it has hidden depths. Even just in terms of its broader design I prefer it to a lot of 70s cheatline liveries. The way it loops down to envelop the tail is nice and the smaller line outlining the main block of color feels almost anachronistic in the sense that it's quite a modern choice. Somehow the two lines on the nose make it look distinctly beaklike, which I think is neat. The wordmark is...acceptable, though unfortunately it seems to only be in English. They primarily used TriStars, which is quite discerning of them. But what's that thing on the tail?

I like the modern logo but I prefer this one far and away. It's really pleasing to look at and looks graceful despite its sharpness. Just very nicely designed. I think, if a good modern designer was given this logo, they could design a truly fantastic livery incorporating it.

Actually, although it undeniably looks like a peacock, it's got a bit less immediately visible of a meaning. Aviation is actually a pretty big part of Sri Lankan folklore, and according to the airline itself that peacock is actually the Dandu Monara, a flying machine flown by the legendary king of Sri Lanka Ravana in the Sinhalese version of the Ramayana. This is incredibly cool. Apparently, flying machines in a broader sense are a common feature of Sri Lankan folklore, and they are generally described as being wooden peacocks. I'm genuinely quite sad that I can't find very much about this in English, except for this article by an American researcher, so if anyone knows of any books in English on the subject please let me know.

It's a very elegant execution of the concept. It's easy to buy this blocky, geometric peacock as a machine, without it losing the ability to be recognized as a bird.

The red, meanwhile, is taken from the Sri Lankan flag. I would honestly love to see a livery for this airline that's on a base of yellow with these gorgeous secondary blue-green, orange, and the absolutely stunning burgundy shade used on the largest square. I think it's very unfortunate that Air Lanka chose a redder shade, because I think the warm hues of the flag are both uncommon in combination and very, very harmonious with each other. Normally I would find four distinct colors a bit busy for a livery trying to be on the simpler side, but with the yellow as a base, the burgundy making up most of the design, and the other two colors used for accent something truly great could be created.

The red they chose, while a more conventional pick that I feel is a bit of a let-down relative to what they could have done, is still a very nice vivid red. The logo is well-positioned on the tailfin, the entire design looks clean, and especially for the time this was thoughtfully designed and well executed.

I'm giving Air Lanka (1979-1998) a C+.

That grade, though, is for the livery. If I were just talking about the logo by itself, this would be one of my favorites I've covered so far.

And then in 1998 something happened.

Remember Air Lanka? This is them now. Feel old yet?

Just kidding. They only owned 40% of Air Lanka. In 1998 Air Lanka was partially privatised and Emirates purchased a minority state. One of the first things they did was completely rebrand the airline.

Well, it's certainly more modern. It is...very very white, and it looks...very much like the Emirates livery. Different colors for the text, different literal logo, but otherwise much is the same. The placement of the text, of the logos on the engines, and of the design on the tail - a sort of swoop from the tip of the fin to the fuselage body.

I think I prefer the old logo. While the new one does incorporate the rest of the flag, which I like, it distinctly feels alive. It feels like a bird. Normally I would like that, but given the inspiration of a wooden flying machine it feels a bit harder to recognize. The original logo was just...really really fantastic.

That said, the way it looks like the peacock is climbing up the tail, and the way it flows onto the main body, is nice.

I'm not sure how I feel about the blue underbelly on some of their planes. I mean, I'm kind of a fan of just telling everyone on the ground to visit Sri Lanka, but the blue feels very strange. If it were up to me I would have just done something which occupied more of the plane for a primary design, so it didn't feel like the wings and tail have a wholly different color scheme from the wordmark and underbelly, but that's how it feels.

It also feels...distinctly Emirates-y in a way I don't like. I actually think Emirates's execution of this particular concept is uninspiring but acceptable, but I just don't like the amount of resemblance here. It isn't exactly Continental and Copa, but it's far from KLM and Air France either.

These planes are mostly all white. Whether or not that's jarring or not really depends on the angle, and I think more often than not it looks okay. Nothing here bothers me, but I feel disappointed. Maybe my visions for how fantastic a livery based on the Sri Lankan flag and the Dandu Monara emblem could be were a bit unrealistic, with how airlines are, but it's a shame to see traces of Emirates in an airline that hasn't even associated with Emirates for over a decade now (it was renationalised in 2008). This is not fantastic, but this is not bad. It is not Lufthansesque, and if I saw this in 1998 I think I would actually be slightly nicer to it. But it's also mostly white, doesn't do anything spectacular, and passes up so much unique potential which could have made it one of my favorites.

I'm giving SriLankan Airlines a C.

I did debate taking that down to a C-, but I ultimately don't even think I can say I dislike this. I just wish it was more. I hope, whatever its future is, somebody commits to making SriLankan Airlines the legendary flying machine it has always had the potential to be.

[illleavemymessageinmysong]

“Demons Dance’? Lord knows what that’s about!…”

I get a feeling that Paul keeps tracks with some of his most personal lyrics away from centre stage: released as bonus tracks on separate editions of albums, as additional tracks on various formats. This goes back to ‘Same Love’, a track written in 1987 but only released as a b-side of the 1997 single ‘Beautiful Night’. A track so glorious that, by any rational standards, it should have been front and centre of an album release.

The usual proviso applies that the lyrics might just be words to go with a tune but, really? The song deals with thoughts of rekindling a past love, with all the complications and uncertainties that would go with that. “Though it may not be as good as new, well, still, it must be better than the pain that I went through”. Listen to how he sings the word “pain”. If he’s not being real there, he’s a much better actor than he’s given credit for.

But what about a few of his by the way tracks from more recent times? Let’s look at ‘Demons Dance’ and ‘Struggle’.

‘Demons Dance’ was recorded during the sessions for ‘New’ but was only released in October 2014 as part of the Collector’s Edition of New. The Paul McCartney Project blog tells us that during his Twitter Q&A on October 30 2014, Paul was asked what was the meaning of ‘Demons Dance’ and what inspired it. He swiftly batted that away with “Demons Dance’? Lord knows what that’s about!” Well, quite. None of the regular tactic of saying that the lyrics have no particular meaning.

The song’s narrator has a desire for a connection with someone, and the feelings that go with this are so strong he likens them to his personal demons. This goes deep. Only by connecting with this person, can he get peace of mind.

“I can't wait much longer 'til you tell me baby, there’s some chance we'll get together maybe, sooner or later I'll be in with half a chance”

This has been a long term feeling and he’s desperate for some message of reciprocation. Only that can ‘exorcise’ his demons. The guy’s got it bad. “Girl I want you to do it, I’ve been waiting so long”. Yep, this goes way back.

Do you write lyrics as intense as this if you don’t really feel them? I’m going with nope.

What about ‘Struggle’, first released on the Japanese version of ‘New’? This one doesn’t hang about getting to the point: “ Want to get you in my heart again, want to love you once more”, it begins. It sounds like the same narrator we heard in ‘Demons Dance’. Again, and even more explicitly, this is addressed to someone the narrator used to be with.

“If you wanna love, if you wanna fight, it doesn’t really matter, I want you tonight”. So maybe this past relationship had its’ ups and downs, was a bit volatile. “I can think of something when I get you home tonight”, he adds. See previous post for the possible importance of “home tonight”, a phrase that turns up in five Macca songs.

“It’s the same old story, it’s happening again”, he declares. This longing is something that has been a feature through the years for the narrator. It has peak periods of intensity.

“Anytime you want me, I’m not hard to find”. This person is out of his current orbit but could contact him easily enough.

“We can work it out together, we'll get through this somehow”. Yeah, we can work it out…..

It ends with “It's the same old story, it's happening again. Life’s eternal struggle”. It may ebb and flow but this feeling isn’t going away.

Jumping ahead to tracks from the Egypt Station sessions, we’ve previously had a look at ‘Get Enough’. One of his most emotionally raw lyrics. Snuck out on streaming platforms as the clock struck 12 at New Year 2019.

Then there’s ‘Sixty Second Street’, released on subsequent editions of ‘Egypt Station’. Set to a pretty tune, this is a lighter take than the other tracks we’ve looked at but, again, describes a desire to connect with someone. Our narrator wants to meet up with this person, just a minute of their time is all he needs. Mind you, he then suggests they “grab a bite”, so maybe a bit longer. A lighter take, yes, but meeting up with this person would make his life complete, so it’s a big deal.

A recurring theme going on here, I reckon.

[punkshort]

Your Marcus Acacius… let me tell you, when I say my life hasn’t been the same since, I’m not even exaggerating. I mean literally. That man is so swoonable it hurts!!😫 it is impossible not to fall madly in love (and lust😉) with him! The way you described both his inner and outer beauty and his irresistible personality and riz and confidence and raw masculinity is just *CHEFS KISS!! You leave such a visceral sense of who he is he has me in a chokehold and Im just mad that he’s not reeeeeal!!😭😭

your world building is so beautiful! it’s so vivid and delightful it makes me wanna live there. (And I live in NYC😆)

The side characters Iizard and the brother are hilarious! I love them AND I wanna throw an oven mitt at them😂

Your protagonist: I like your protagonist so much she’s so endearing. She’s so sweet and kind even when she’s ready to kick Danny’s ass you can tell she still loves him and will always look out for him. She’s not perfect and struggles at work (and with life) like most of us do but she’s smart and strong and resilient like we all try/want to be so she’s very relatable. It’s easy to see how a man like Acacius would fall in love with her. And even when she’s angry and annoyed she’s still very lovable (in contrast to Kate and Leopold). And that Matt guy. Well… he deserves everything he got lol And the smut… oh the smut. It’s so fluffy and sweet and SO HOTTT🥵🥵 I melted on the floor like your protagonist said🫠🫠

TW: I don’t wanna make this weird I swear. you don’t have to reply at all it’s totally fine. I just want you to know that your art has literally changed my life. I don’t mean to overshare but… being able to take refuge in the world you’ve created got me through weeks of PTSD flashback hell. And I’ve had this one difficulty all my life and decades of expensive therapy couldn’t make a dent but In Another Life cured it. I’m excited to live again🥹. I just wanna say from the bottom of my heart how grateful I am that you shared your beautiful writing with us!❣️❣️💝💖💝💖

Sincerely,

A Marcus Acacius Girly

PS I did reblog your work but I was too embarrassed to leave all this in my comments so I had to go anon in your inbox😅

This was so beautiful to read it took me a minute to figure out how to answer it - I can't really put into words what this means to me but I'll try 🥹

Firstly, thank you so much for pointing out all your favorite parts because that's my favorite part! I absolutely adore hearing what struck you the most as a reader and I like to hear if what I've written came across the way it intended and how I imagined it, etc, so this was and always is so wonderful to hear. It just gave me that extra motivation I needed to work on part 3 later 🤭 (I've already started it but didn't get very far)

Secondly, thank you for sharing a bit about your personal struggles. I know that has to be so hard for you to share and I appreciate that you felt impacted enough by something I wrote to want to say something about it. I don't think I know how to describe the way my chest literally tightened when I read that part but I'm floored something I wrote could help anybody in the world the way you described. It makes me so happy I could help you in that way, it really truly does. I really hope things are looking better for you now ❤️

Lastly, thank you for reblogging! Don't feel obligated to write anything when you do, I appreciate it all the same!

I'm very grateful you reached out to me and trusted me enough to share a piece of yourself. I sincerely hope the rest of the story meets your expectations and continues to bring a little light into your life ❤️ I also rely heavily on this platform (and my own writing) as a form of therapy (and maybe a little escapism, sure) so we certainly have that in common 😘