#like I AM POOOOR

[roseband]

fully tabbed out alive

maybe record cover?? but do not want to be /perceived/

anyone want me to post transcribed bass tab for 5-string??

desperately want to know if jeff got a new bass to record, or is using an octave pedal, or is playing drop d cause the song goes down to D below the E string and Eb below the E string

[crazyexdirkfriend]

What's the behind the scenes for shag etc? 👀 (also the icon on your blog theme is so cute...)

ty ty! it's from chapter 2 of two short hours etc. in case anyone didn't see it. okay this might get long so read more time

I have so many behind the scenes for that. Firstly: the playlist. this is what I made because my huge dirkjake playlist isn't thematically consistent. but to elaborate on the Lore of my choices:

dirt-emma blackery is actually the song that gave me the idea for the fic, and then down for the count-bowling for soup played afterwards. the key being snarky bits like "then you came on twitter saying i'm bitter, honey have you looked in the mirror" "how far down will you go on me, ONLINE" "guess things go sour after they pass their sell-by-date"

dead girl walking (reprise) was initially on my playlist for calvariæ and strip away my conscience (FIFTY SHADES OF MORALLY GREEEY) was on my two short hours etc. playlist, but both made the migration over thematically

someone gets hurt is solely on this for POOOOR LITTLE ME ALL TRAPPED IN THIS FABULOUS SHOOOOW. jake in a golden bird cage of his own making.

the bit where jake walks out on stage to endorse karkat with the back light is based on the music video for taylor swift's "i bet you think about me" when she...well comes out with a back light to "the voice is so loud, saying 'why did you let her go?'" it's very revenge dress moment for jake here. rip princess diana, she would have loved my fanfiction where dirk and jake hunt each other for sport.

i'm on it by the cast of nashville is on this because "the only over i'll be is over your shoulder" is why i have jake make those stupid billboards to haunt dirk with.

god is a freak is on this. but dirk is god in this scenario. WEIRD YOU'RE ACTING LIKE MY BOYFRIEND :///

Some other behind the scenes lore, like deleted scenes: I was supposed to rehash the scene where Roxy (and Jake) comes out as NB but it didn't fit in the end. Here's the excerpt I did write

There was also supposed to be a scene where Jake sent Dirk this meme but I forgot to put it in. I instead complained on Twitter about forgetting to put it in and then my third level lecturer SENT ME MY OWN TWEET and then offered me work. I am still haunted by this fact. I have no idea why this happened. Deep deep lore. Here's the image btw

This scene was also supposed to be in it but I had no idea where to go with it. Raccoon was supposed to be a series regular.

This note on the final conflict scene is the only time I used the term "emotionally devastate." The fic was unnamed until literally 3 days before its release bc I couldn't think of anything other than "the blood between us is horrendous but in a vacillating manner as opposed to a xenophobic one- (Troll Taylor's Version)" which was way too long considering no one ever types the full name of shag emotionally devastate etc. anyway lmao

The billboards and the bloat advertising on the dating apps are things I've had Jake do before in RP, both deliberately and accidentally. I find it so infinitely funny to think about the idea of Jake believing so hard that Dirk would never love anyone other than him that he (hope powers) makes it functionally impossible for Dirk to move on. Dirk looks for him in nothing and finds him there anyway. Buys a drink at a bar and Skaianet sponsors Orange Crush now. Is on a date with some guy who is like "hold on, you're jake english's ex? you broke up with jake english? sorry I could never date anyone stupid enough to let jake english go" (shoving breadsticks in purse). I think Jake would also set up Tinder so he pops up every three swipes but when Dirk swipes right on him eventually he just gets a Skaianet helpdesk bot

Other behind the scenes hmm. I spent the vast majority of 8-10 weeks not writing this and 4 weeks actually writing the bulk of it, but most of the time was spent hand wringing on discord because I was convinced that this fic would not be received well so I'm actually hugely pleasantly surprised that people have liked it!

[wench-and-jezebel]

Ten Inch Hero Reaction:

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

Such a different vibe from Devour ☠️☠️☠️☠️  [alksdjf Tis true]

“Normal people need not apply” ☠️☠️☠️ we’d fit in there  [We would indeed]

Danneeellll

Oh noooo

Sir

I wanna work here [:)) I KNOW]

[I love that the customers get to vote]  The dog.  I love it  [Yes, and the dog]

Hmmm

Ahhhhh!  Omg! He’s here!

☠️☠️☠️☠️  “Well he’s employed here”  [That line bothers me so but anyway]

🤣🤣🤣 “And now you’re hiring people who fail the interview?”

Well.  Shit.  [She’s lying, dear]

🤣🤣🤣  Poor buddy

[Zo!  I love her]

Oh, man, chat rooms  [I know!  We'd never talk long distance on an electronic device]

☠️☠️☠️☠️ His look

Idek what this movie is about and I love it

It just is so chill and nothing is happening (so far) but it’s like 😍😍  [This is the vibe throughout]

☠️☠️☠️☠️ This lady 🤣🤣🤣🤣  [I told you I loved her]

Welp. Now I’ll think of that next time I eat eggs.

☠️☠️☠️ DoorDash.  Back in the day

She ain’t even look both ways; she’s definitely a witch

Ooooo

OHHHHH WELL SHIT.  WELP SHIT.

THIS WHOLE MOVIE JUST YEETED ITSELF A DIFFERENT DIRECTION

Damn, that’s sad af

Ma’am.  You stop that.  Flirt.

Awwwww.  Well that was wholesome as helll

[Buddy is not subtle okay]  ☠️☠️☠️

Bruh this is the one I wanted to watch the most and I’m gonna struggle commenting because I’m too into it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

They have the same sketch book 🥺🥺🥺

Oooooooh is this going where I think it is [*whistles*]  Oh nooooo tho.  Cause it’s gonna be drama first.  That’s a big no no in adopting

I WANT THAT VANNNNNN

Priestly is adorable

Oh, douchebags

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

Well that’s what you get you ass

Bruh.  Why am I not loving Danneel?  I wanna love Danneeel!

☠️☠️☠️☠️ Not the eye flutters!  I’m ded  [I love him]  I knowwww

Awwwwww muh heart.  I can’t take it!

Plz tell me Jen doesn’t get hurt

This kid is ADORABLE

AWWWWWW

[I love Priestly flipping the bottle, btw; watch for it]

Oooof  [Poor buddy :(]

Ngl she deserved the door in the face

Poorrrr buddyyyy

[Us if we ever met in person: "we tell each other everything-"]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

HE IS THE COOOOLEST BOSS

POOOOR BUDDDDYYYY

[THIS SCENE]  OH I KNOW THIS SCENE  [I've made you watch it]

[Sharky boy 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣]

[The first scene that made me like Tish]  Yess!!

Oooooo that’s the face of someone who likes someone pjhhhh

Omg, buddy

Well shit it worked

That’s adorable omg

This is soooo awkward cause it’s gonna look so bad when he realizes

Also ooof; everyone putting feet in mouths

The phone cord ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ Deceased

[Poor pup looks Unhappy]  Oh poor Bam Bam

Oh the buzz ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Oh my god

[Return of Jezebel the Deed critic]  BRUH.  I GOT NO WARNING.   [I forgot alskfdj]

DANEEEL  YOUR HUSBAND IS LIKE😭👏🏼👏🏼 not him

WELP 👀 *sigh*

[Sheeeeee]

Sweetie dump his assssss

He’s getting bent over by brad anyway [ALKSDJF;LKADSJF]

[It was a demogorgon]  ☠️🤣🤣🤣

[The little girl shouting "FRAT PARTY" tho]

I love this 😭😭😭

Whooooa awkwarddddddddd

Ohhhhhhh just tell me what happens.  I can’t take it!  [About?]  When he finds out  [Wait and see :)]

☠️☠️☠️☠️ [I love him; Priestly's my beloved]

Hell, I love all of them! Even Tish is coming around

Bruh this lady is a witch

[Priestly reacting like that as if he hasn't been doing about the same with Tish tho alksdjflkadsjf]  🤣🤣🤣🤣

I WANT THIS VANNNNNN

Why would you chase a goose

[Okay, I'm warning you now that Jen kindaaaaa annoys me here, but anyway.  (Give it a few minutes.)]   Oooof ok

TISH

JEN

WOTS HAPPENING

Oh, pity party.  Oh, I see

[MA'AM YOU JUST LEFT HIM SITTING BY HIMSELF WDYM]  This is definitely not ok

But like… why are they not saying she’s not ugly 👀👀  This isn’t okay either

[And btw.  I've been in a similar position to her.  So like.  I understand.  I just don't respect it.]

I WANT THIS JOBBBBB

["I was sitting by the phone, waiting, wondering..."  BUDDY.  "There's a perfectly good reason we didn't call" NO?!?!?  THAT’S ALL THE MORE REASON TO CALL HIM AND TELL HIM NOT TO BRING IT UP OR SOMETHING?!?!?]

Ooooh get her

Bruh he speaks truth

["Why are you suddenly Fuzzy's best friend?"  Because he didn't deserve that shit, wdym]

Oooof  [BUDDYYYY]

[The voice crack tho]  OOOOOFFFF

OOOOO WHATCHUUU DOING buddy  [Priestly be meddling]

Oh my goddddd 

OH MY GOD

BRUHHH

BRUHHH BRAD

DOUCHEEEEEBAGS

OH SHIT

WEAK ASS PUNK FELL LIKE A FEATHER

OH BOY

Oh boy

Well shit

Oooooofta

Beat.  His.  Ass.

Someone please do it

Oooo- Get him

Ok?  And? 🤣

[This be go well]

GETTTTTT HIMMM

OH SHIT  YESSSS TRUCKERRRRRR

“YOU DICKLESS YUPPIE”  THAT WAS AMAZING

💕💕💕💕 Preistlyyyyyy

[Tish, ma’am.  You came onto every dude in the shop… Defy gender norms and ask Priestly first instead of making him do it.]

I’m trying to think of who Zo is.  I’ve seen her in something else.  I love her!  She’s so calming

[He has the dark half of a yin-yang tattoo, and I want her to have the other half; I think it'd be so cute]

😭😭😭😭😭 Loveeeeee.  So much loveeeeee!

☠️☠️☠️☠️ What. Are.  [These dudes did not learn the lesson] 🤣🤣🤣🤣

“Keep the lubeeee” [The look tho]

Well she gets A Julia.  Not her Julia, but she also gets a Noah.  So like… Win win

Awwwww

Oh OHHHHH

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Fuzzzyyyyy

[Also, the music here is from the Deckerstar prom.  It's the song he plays for her]  Oh my gawdddddddd

😭😭😭😭

Aight cmon gimme the bad ending

Priestly was like nope I’m getting credit for this

Why can’t they just kiss and let it end here

[Look at himmmm!!!  Buddy's so nervous slkdfj;laksdjf]

In her head (Danneel, not Tish), she’s like yep I’m marrying him

[Who gave him permission to be this adorable tho.  The wide-eyed curious stare thing is just ack.]

Ahhhhh

Aight so headcanon he swaps right back

But omg he rubbed his lips

I’m ded

I’m not even mad, that was adorable

[Hmph.]

Wot Is Happening??? Sweet lord.  [They’re getting married]  Nekked  [Yup]

– – – 

Endpoint Reaction:

Jezebel: That was really good!  😭😭😭😭😭  10/10  (Hah)

Wench: Glad it lived up

Jezebel: Ok I do hate he completely changed for her.  That sucks.  They should have had the scene on the beach him back like before.  Also… Boaz & Platisha  *sigh*  What names.  This was the strangest, most all-over-the-place-yet-all-connected movie I’ve ever seen! But omg no one died!  And everyone got a happy ending, minus Priestley’s style!  (RIP it was not deserved.)

Wench: Yup, ‘tis true

Jezebel: For Jen… I’m glad she got a happy ending. I think I’m even happier he called her pretty. Because I would have been like 👀👀👀☠️ had he walked in and been like… you’re a good person ☠️ And like, no, looks should not matter, but it’s like.. friendship code to lift your friends up… not agree with them *sigh* 🤣  And they didn’t agree, but they didn’t DISAGREE either

Wench: Right

Jezebel: Idk that bugged tf out of me

Wench: Makes sense.  Do we know what we're doing next?

Jezebel: Hmm…

Wench: We still have our shows to be doing, technically-

Jezebel: So we could do one of each show-  SBC

Wench: Sounds good!  Til then!

[shirks-all-responsibilities]

Saw this on my dash and started reading, and the moment I got to the part with Frankie struggling with the doorknob I was INSTA-TRANSPORTED to a memory of reading this a looooong time back when I first found pedro boy fics, and the JOY I tell you, the JOYYYY in re-discovering this??? This creme de la creme piece about Frankie at his MOST NEEDY AND FERAL, awash with SO much loving established-relationship goodness and softness that I am just a mess after reading it??

I love his progression at the start--the aggression of that car door slam and that fiesty lock fumbling, and then how the second he hears her voice he shifts into much more subdued defeat, that "catch of tearful frustration in his voice," poooor bbbbyyy!!

And then you proceed to write a fkn masterpiece--the 😺👅👑 with such desperation and genuine need for praise and reassurance, in such a loving relationship? WHAT A COMBINATION!!!

"'Baby,' he murmurs, lips dragging against your clit. It’s pitched up and plaintive like he’s begging, but he can’t find the words to fit what he needs." PITCHED UP AND PLAINTIVE????? This detail???

"'Querida.' The epithet leaves him in a whine." - The EPITHET. I am obsessed with this, pondered it. Love it.

AND THENNNNN, THERE IS THISSSS: "His shout is almost as loud as yours, and he muffles his cries against your still-twitching cunt." Total jaw drop. Licherally jaw dropping allllll the way to the floor. Is there a more perfect Needy!Frankie way of describing this moment, what he can't help but do? I think NOTTTTT. Jesus...

And you sprinkle little details throughout that are just enough to convey the scene and sensory info that add so much with so little…like those breaths through his nose "like an agitated bull," his hair "rough with the salt of dried sweat as your work your fingers into it," the description of his signature scent after a hard day?

This is just...perfect. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

not to come yell at you or anything but i saw those frankie tags 👀 and i am in *need*

Lord, that is a whole-ass mood.  Needy!Frankie lives rent-free in my brain 24/7.  Like this exact scenario has been in my head for w e e k s and I just haven’t had the braincells to get it down.  But hey, no time like the present, right? *cracks knuckles*

1.5k of unbeta’d and unedited Needy!Frankie smut, f!receiving oral, with a side of frankie x floor (I kid, mostly).

-----------------

As soon as Frankie pulls in the drive, you know something’s wrong.  He takes the turn just a little too sharp, engine running too hot and too loud before he kills it.  There’s a long beat of silence, long enough that you begin to think that maybe you were just overthinking things.  But then there’s the unmistakable sound of the driver side door slamming shut, and your feet are already carrying you towards the front door.

You’re halfway down the hall when you hear his keys rattling in the door – and they keep rattling, the doorknob twisting as far as the lock will allow before releasing back.  Either he can’t get the key in the lock, or he can’t quite make it catch.  The mechanism clicks, straining, and for a second you’re afraid he’ll break the thing out of pure frustration.

“Ease up, Frankie,” you call through the door.  “I’m here, baby, I got it.”

The rattling ceases, and you hear the unmistakable thump of Frankie’s head coming to rest against the wood.

“Querida,” he says.  “I can’t...I can’t get the fucking door.”  It’s muffled through the wood, but there is a catch of tearful frustration in his voice that makes your heart beat a little faster as you undo the locks.

When the door swings open you’ve only got a second to take in the look of him – his eyes strained under the shadow of his crooked ball cap – before he’s pushing against you, crowding you back into the hall.  He catches the door with a heel and kicks it shut so hard the windows rattle in their frames.

“Hey, hey,” you try to soothe, pushing his hat off to smooth his hair back.  “What is it, what’s wrong?”

He only shakes his head, breathing hard and quick through his nose like an agitated bull.  His throat works, fighting to swallow or to speak, you’re not sure.  His hands fall heavy against your hips, fingers curling into the waistband of your jeans and tugging.  “Please, baby,” he mutters in a voice so strained it’s on the verge of breaking.  His fingers slide around until his thumb rests on the button of your fly.  “I need it.  I need you.  I–”

You nod, stroking your thumbs over the overgrown stubble on his jaw.  This isn’t the first time you’ve been here.  Something's gone wrong today.  It might be something big, it might be nothing, but whatever it was was enough to shake him down and leave him feeling like he can’t do anything right.  He’ll explain it to you later when he can breathe again, when his shoulders aren’t pulled up in one solid knot and his jaw has finally unclenched.  He always does.  But right now, more than anything else, he needs to prove that he can do something right. 

And that’s you.

“I’m right here, Frankie,” you tell him with a willing nod.  “You got me.”

Frankie makes a soft, desperate little noise in the back of his throat and carries you wordlessly to the floor, unable or unwilling to wait long enough to get you into bed.  His mouth is on yours only for a moment, just long enough for a hard, grateful kiss before he moves down your body.  He’s too needy to be gentle, too desperate.  You’re sure you hear stitches ripping as he yanks your fly open and drags your jeans and underwear both down to your ankles.  They bunch up around your sneakers, but Frankie's normally dexterous hands are too unsteady for that, clumsy with need and agitation, so he just pushes your legs up and ducks under them, settling on the floor between your bared thighs.

When his mouth finds you, you sigh and he groans.  The sound resonates through his whole body and into you, buzzing against your thighs and the closed seam of your cunt.  His hair is rough with the salt of dried sweat as you work your fingers into it, tipping your hips up as you press his head down.  His hands slide up between your thighs, pushing them aside, and it takes a little effort to keep your ankles from knocking into the back of his head as he opens you wider.

On a good day Frankie Morales is one of the most patient men you’ve ever met, in bed or out of it.  He’ll coax you open slowly, work you over with his hands and mouth – and always his whole mouth, none of that timid tongue-flicking bullshit – until you’re wet and open and ready for whatever he wants to give you.  Even if it’s just more of his graciously worshipful mouth.

But this is not a good day, and in place of that gentle patience there is an almost feral hunger.  Frankie parts you with his fingers, opening you up to drag the flat of his tongue up from your entrance to your clit over and over in hard, aggressive strokes.

You keep your fingers moving through his hair, breath turning ragged as he fits his mouth to you, lapping and sucking eagerly at your sex.

“Baby,” he murmurs, lips dragging against your clit.  It’s pitched up and plaintive like he’s begging, but he can’t find the words to fit what he needs.

“Yes, Frankie,” you answer, shuddering as his teeth press briefly against your tender flesh.  “God yes, baby.  You’re always so good.”

And there’s that desperate little sound at the back of his throat again as his broad hands grip the soft flesh of your thighs tight.  His shoulders shift under you, your legs rocking up and back, and you look down to find him rutting his hips shamelessly against the floor.

There.  That’s what he needs.  And that’s easy enough to give, praises flowing out of you steadily as you roll your hips against his voracious mouth.  “So good, Frankie,” you breathe.  “You’re getting me so wet, baby, I can feel it.”

Instantly his tongue trails down, delving into you with a strength that always takes your breath away.  He moans deliriously, the taste of your arousal only serving to whet his appetite further.  Two thick fingers curl into you, pressing up and drumming insistently as he devours you like a man possessed.

The praises dissolve on your tongue like sugar, your voice gone tight and ragged as he lights you up, the words harder and harder to focus on.  And that’s even better.  Your broken gasps leave him lurching, grinding down into the floor and moaning against you.  It’s good, it’s so good and he can tell how good it is for you, his shoulders rocking into you faster as you begin to quiver and jerk under the assault.

“Querida.”  The epithet leaves him in a whine.  “Baby, please.  I need you to come.”

“Close,” you rasp out, grabbing fistfuls of his hair and guiding him, holding him still while you rock your clit against the wet, yielding heat of his mouth. “Frankie, baby...f-fuck– ” 

The motion of his body falters as you use him, the sound of his belt buckle knocking against the floorboards now a hard, syncopated beat.  The pressure of his fingers inside you reaches a fever pitch and you shatter, shouting his name and pounding a fist on the floor as you come, shaking and rocking with the spasm.

And that, blessedly, means you get to watch him come right after, his body rigid, feet digging in for purchase as his hips knock stiltedly against the floor.  His shout is almost as loud as yours, and he muffles his cries against your still-twitching cunt.  You fall back on your elbow, head swimming, and you can feel the hard line of Frankie’s shoulders finally relax under you.

You unclench the fist in his hair, stroke down to cup the back of his neck.  “Come up, baby.  C’mere.”

Panting, Frankie nods dumbly, and pushes himself forward on his elbows.  He kisses you, gentle once more, his heart still beating hard enough to make his breathing falter. 

“Hey.  I love you,” you breathe into his mouth.

He knocks his forehead into yours, closing his eyes.  “Love you, too, baby.”

And then he curls into you, tucking his head into the side of your neck and pressing himself down.  His belt buckle digs into your stomach, and you can feel a broad stripe of wet warmth soaking through the front of his jeans under the slowly softening bulge of his cock.

With a contented hum you wrap your arms around him, holding him tight.  He smells of hot sun and dried sweat and the lingering sharpness of engine oil.  You cradle the back of his head with one hand, rub slowly up and down his back with the other. 

“Bad day?” you ask, kissing the corner of his jaw next to his ear.

He nods, scruff scraping along your shoulder.  “Yeah.  Bad day,” he agrees.  You feel the warm press of his lips against the side of your neck, slow and sweet, before he draws in a long, shuddering breath.  He holds it for a beat and then releases it slowly; a bone-deep sigh of utter relief.  “Better now.”

[aiden-png]

So, I was re-reading The Ball's In Your Court, (for like the 17th time) and this scenario hit me like a bag of bricks: Vio and Shadow are at a restaurant on valentines day, and the waitress says something about a couple's special if they say how long they've been dating. Shadow says "oh we're not a couple" and the waitress looks over to see Vio staring intensely at the menu, with the look on his face of a man who's been hopelessly pining for years.

aaaAAAAA OMGGG!!! 17 times?? I am just ghdfjghdjfhhjdfhgkdfk beyond flattered aaaa!! and this SCENARIO YESSSS OMFG!! though I think Shadow would totally lie and just say some bullshit number for free food, and Vio would just have to sit there and suffer like “:) yes we are a very happy couple thank you for noticing” fjghdfjhgfjdhkfdj XDDD Shadow being oblivious is the BEST and poooor pining Vio.. I just love to see him suffer XD I love this so much!!

[kanene-yaaay]

Hi! So... It was me, shy anon! 🌼

I'm so glad you're okay to be friends, I screamed when I read your answer x) I was so nervous, I couldn't stop looking at Tumblr again end again to see if you answered xD

Thank you ✨

Hehe but I know French can be quite hard, if you want to learn I can help you :D And of course I can say something! I'll say something easy :

"Tu aimes les chats, les poulpes et les choses sucrées" that means "You like cats, octopuses and sweet things" :)

If you're from Brazil, do you speak Portuguese then? Or is it another language? Can you say something too, pleeeeease? :D

Maybe I should DM you now? I don't knooow tell meeee x)

Passe une bonne journée et prends soin de toi (Have a nice day and take care of yourself) ✨

I am sorrey for taking so long to answer u ajgwuwgjwveo and hey! Hi!! :DD Nice to meet youuu!!!

And oh gosh, that sentence was so cute. Sucrées reminds me of sweet things somehow (probably because of sugar) so ! Yesh! Learning! 😎

Yeah, it is! Brazilian Portuguese! And yup: Eu posso falar 'alguma coisa também, poooor favor' (I can say 'something too, pleeeease) :D

Vajvsuvsufskvwuvw I know, I know. I am very funny and my sense of humor will conquer the whole world/j

Gwugwigwyvwjvwyw <333 no, but for real: Muito obrigada por todas suas askys! Tú és um doce de pessoa >w<)s2 (Thank you very much for all your askys. You're so sweet! >w<)s2

Have a nice day too! Take careee <333

[rendezvous-ramblings]

Did you tell E about what B did?

Hi,

Yes, of course. There's no secrets between E and I. I've been venting to him about work so he knows all about B. When I told him what happened yesterday he was like "See what did I tell you! He was flirting hard. It's kind of cute how you're oblivious to it."

E once said B was flirting hard because he complimented me on my work ethic and how driven I am. Haha, I still don't see it cause that's not what a guy usually says when he's hitting on you. 🥴 I guess with the winking and glances I should have known better. E didn't seem jealous over text he just teased me and said "Well, the guy is going to get his heart broken. Poooor B." Like I've said before E is feels very secure and smug about our relationship.

[bambisfuneral]

It’s a lifestyle not everybody can relate to💁🏻‍♀️

currently studying in the Sims to procrastinate studying irl

[dainty-baneberry]

Prompt #22: Argy-bargy

(Stormblood. Rhalgr’s Reach. Post Deltascape)

“That ain't changed, I see.” Biggs observed cocking his head across the reach to the silver haired Elezen and the blond Garlean who were glaring at each other ominously. “Mmm?” Wedge observed. As a lalafel he was much shorter than the Roegadyn Biggs, and had to maneuver himself to a standing position at the picnic table to see. “Carine and Nero, having a bit of the old argy-bargy again.” Biggs commented sardonically. Still dressed in simple white robes, that would allow their Healers to tend to their wounds quickly, Biggs and Wedge were only visiting for Gridania and were expected back before nightfall. They had been gone for almost 2 full weeks and the other members of the Garlond Ironworks, Nero excluded, were glad to see their friends on their feet however. “Again should imply that they ever sodding stop.” Jessie snorted, adopting a rather poor imitation of Nero's voice; “Indeed I am, in fact, a giant swot and you have not kissed my left arse cheek appropriately.” Biggs chuckled, forcing his deep, masculine voice into a higher pitched imitation of Carine; “I have terrible self esteem and don't know what I see in you but I'll set you on your arse long before I ever kiss it.” The group broke into laughter. Making fun of the turbulent, unhealthy relationship  the pair was engaged in was an on going joke between the Ironworks Employees. Their only other source of Entertainment was currently a bit emotionally delicate and they actually liked Cid Garlond well enough to treat him gently. As opposed to their thoughts on Nero tol Scaeva. Carine, over the other side of the reach and oblivious to the teasing, ran her hands through her silvery white hair, frustrated; “Just because you were born from the waste by-product of an Allagans monstrosity doesn't mean normal people don't go visit their Mum from time to time.” “I only suggested that the timing was a bit suspect, what with everything with Omega.” Nero shot back, wagging a finger at her and feeling like she was putting words in his mouth. He never said she couldn't. He wouldn't dare! That would only make her do something twice as much. He had learned that lesson well and took pride in never repeating a mistake. Besides, it wasn't his place to tell her what to do or not do anyway. Again, he had made that mistake once. Once. Carine smiled sweetly, her voice lowering to a gentle coo; “I'm sooooorry, did the poooor aethetically challenged Garlean forget that Aetherytes exist?”

This was accompanied with an irate gesture to the one that spun serenely in place at the entrance to Rhalgr's Reach.

“That was low.” Nero glared at her over the top of his sunglasses witheringly.

“You started it.” Carine shrugged, untouched by his ire. “I most certainly did not!” “You most certainly did!” The pair exchanged heated, furious glances in angry silence. Jessie held up a hand, silently counting down 3...2....1. Carine lunged and Nero grabbed and mouths met each other hungrily. Within a second where was two people arguing was two people locked in a passionate embrace, Carine's hands gripping the back of Nero's shirt and his gripped around her biceps. Biggs sighed long suffering, and turned away from the scene as did the others. They knew full well the idiot pair would disappear into Nero's tent in the very near future and ruin their game of making fun of them. Wedge groused into his oatmeal; “Drat, now what are we going to do for entertainment?”

[kookiesjoonies]

nononono🥺🥺 jimin🥺poor poor babie omg no yes men ain’t shit except for you pls don’t let tae hurt you😭 i am honestly begging you to let these two get together please please please 🥺💜 jimin doesn’t deserve to be hurt like that😔💜 also idk how to feel abt yoongi and yn making up but ive decided i like it,, for now👀 and jungkook and yn holy theyre so cute🥺 yes hold each other pls fall asleep together but also,,, are we getting the smut we deserve next chapter sjsksjsjs 👀❤️

poooor jimin! he never expected to fall for tae. 🤧

and uhhhh... yes you are. ;)

[missamyrisa2]

H-Hey miss Amy, its 🐰 here. i am genuinley so nurvouse about doing this, its my first time sending an ask to a lovley, beautiful ler likevyou 💖

I was wondering, if its, y'know, ok if you like, comfort me with sweet, soft cuddles, light tickles and maybe some baby talk? sorry if its weird 🥲

awwww my sweeeet babehhhh of courseeeee ~ you can snuggle up anyyyy time with your Amyyyy and have allll the ticklessss your adorable wiggglyyy self can dream of. Maybeeee we'lll starttt oohh I dunnnooo on that tum? Mmmhmmm your cuuuute wiiiiddle tumm tum? Maybe some ticklemama kissiesss? Mmhmm you're so sweet and cute and just wanna get allll that attention and be treated so special huh? Poooor thing poor poor babehhhh ~ are you my little cute bunny wunny? Gonna squeak for me all sweetly when I give you these tinyyy muahhhhss? Ooh those are just my thumbs rubbing lil luv circles on your sides while I kissy kissyy ~ Coochie coochie coooo babydolllll you can wiggle all you like ooh yes squeaking is totallyyy fine toooo you let it alll out now ticklemama's gotcha and she's not letting gooooo nooooo ~ muuah muahhh tickle tickle tickle! You're tooo precioussss ~ and tooo amazinglyyyyy wigglyy like thissss ~ how about knee squeeziessss? Some knee squeeziesss? Ohhh dont worry ticklemama is alwayssss gentle~~ just little ooohh let's call them finger hugssss

Yessss kick them legs sweeet bunnyyyyy you can buck tooo ohh yessss coochie cooochieeee~ You keep that up and i'm gonna getcha under your knees toooo mmhmmm ~ you love being tickled don't youuuu getting all sillly wigggly sweeet? Gonna gittchie gitchie gooo youuuuu~ You like my nice soft featherrrr? Twirling on that bouncyyyy tum and into your navel while I tickle tickle tickle under these kickyyy legsssss aww yesss kick it up my giggledolllll ~ it's onlyyy gonna tickle more! Oooh my feather fits right into your button doesn't ittttt ~ just swishes and swirls as you giggle and giggle gooooo ~ my babehhhh bunnyyyy loves these tickles I doooo believe and you're just cute as a button mmhm cute as your bellybuttonnnn~

Come here tickle bunnyyyy I'll give you allll the softtt touches you crave mhmmm mmhmm ~ I knoww I knoww it tickless it tickles so much and you love being so giggly squirmyy yes you do you love being so cute for meeee ~ so let's just get my arm around you hereee and you snuggle up and that's my fingers on your abdomen and up your sidesss and riiibs mmhmm I wantt some babyribbie kissiess yess I doooo let's just kisss each one like sooooo ~ and you can wiggle wiggle wiggle through all my coochie coochie cooooosss~~

[quatschmachen]

Rrrrrrrrant

I am so fed up with Conservative Arrogance in Alberta.

Apparently in the long debate regarding workers rights /union contracts the UCP handed out EAR PLUGS so they dont have to do their job and listen to the official opposition!

WHY IS THIS CONSIDERED APPROPRIATE WHAT THE FUCK

The ARROGANCE

I’m absolutely incensed.

“Weeh we’re the richest province but we cant pay our teachers, nurses, doctors, nor build hospitals... weeeh why should we bother widening the highway of death for fort mcmurray that costs money eweeehhh us poooor poooooooor Alberttannnsss ssuuuuffferrrinng because we dont understand how taxes workkkkkk...lets give tax breaks to people so they can cut the work force and fuck off to elsewhere “

i like honestly cant

[madou-dilou]

Lord Viren : death on his knees.

Hey I got a death-theory about Viren

Yes I confess I'm obsessed with this character

So, if we move to the theory of mind control / death

The ancestor's soul, imprisoned in the scepter, manipulates Viren's feelings, emphasizing some (hatred, anger and ambition) and annihilating others, without destroying them; they are still there, but much less powerful (despair due to the death of Harrow, affection for his idiot children).

So, when the spectrum is destroyed, Viren will feel again (and, in a way, resurrect)

Suppose Soren can not kill the broyals

and in the final battle of the series, Viren, who calls himself a pragmatist, kills Soren in punishment.

But Viren begins to realize that something is wrong with him: "Damn I sent millions of people to death in a world war, I just killed my son and I do not feel anything, what the hell is going on -t it "

Claudia and Callum succeed in destroying the scepter of Viren

So Viren can feel again

He sees what he did

He sees all the desperation that his war against Xadia has provoked (to avenge the death of Harrow, but he now realizes how pointless it was)

Explosion of feelings

I sent thousands of people to death during the World War against Xadia and I do not fear anything

I killed my son and I did not feel anything

I know that I am a pragmatic but not so pragmatic? !!!

Why am I feeling such pain only now? !!

and WTF IS IT THAT I DID? !!!

WHAT DID I DO ?!

AND WHY ? To avenge a dead, fool who committed suicide? To avenge a suicide ?!

Then he remembers the legend about his cane, it was containing the soul of the first dark mage who put his soul in the staff to achieve a kind of immortality; then waited for a psychological choc to slowly kill the cane’s possessor by mental manipulation. And this chock was Harrow’s death; or the moment right before : The genuflexion.

Viren realizes his whole life since Harrow’s death, was just a magic trick

He leaded the world to chaos just because of a magic trick.

.He sees all the elves around him, who are just preparing their final attack to kill him

“-Avada ...  (lets suppose)

Callum and Claudia then shout like “Stop ! This is a suicide, dont u see ?!”

“- KEDAVRA !!!

And Viren falls to his knees.

What a way for a bad guy to die.

even if, to be honest, it is really a pity to completely unmask Viren: "Oh, it was not his fault, his ancestor was possessing him, poor poor poooor innocent cinnamon roll"

He must have enough freedom to be really guilty and have reasons to commit suicide.

Like "Yes, I did those crimes of my own free will, without the influence of the cursed scepter, I did them, I am guilty, I can not live with these crimes with my conscience and I want to die -and perhaps, see Harrow, Sarai and Soren... on the other side ? But is there an afterlife for people like me ?! ... After all, how does that matter ? Who cares ..." (well Claudia cares much about him but he doesnt know it, he thinks she hates him for proper reasons)

But anyway.

What a way for a bad guy to die.

[starryvioletnight]

Paper Faces on Parade

Summary: In celebration of the first year Maskiplier became and was a thing, I am writing a little thing! Trigger warnings for Maskiplier- I know the Mask thing was not fun for everyone. This is tagged with tw maskiplier and maskiplier, for those blacklisting. Anyway, enjoy~

The lights flashed and flickered overhead as the... entity, made its way down the hall. Laughter sputtered and spewed from its mouth like a broken pipe, unable to be held back. If there had been any around to hear, they would have fled from his sight. If any were left alive, perhaps the entity would delight from such terror.

Then again, the entity took delight in most things.

He stalked down the hall, his oozy body slid from wall to wall. He coated every inch, making it his own. His mask, white in color, was plunged in the ooze, not budging even a bit as he sloshed.

As he entered the room, all that remained was a TV, static billowing and echoing, a worthy rival to the laughter he brought with him where ever he went.

"Sssssso one remainssss." He hissed as he spoke, the mask flashed and changed shape, the grin having grown wider. "Pooooor poor little attorney! Poooor poor district attorney!" He cackles. "Trapped inside the glass! How do you feel, locked away in there?"

A fist pounded on the glass, and it cracked. The entity laughed even louder at the sight. "Even trapped in there, you root for them. For the one who imprisoned you," His maked flashed again, becoming the face of Darkiplier, set in grim preservance. "And the one imprisoned in his own mind!" The masked flashed, and Wilford's face, even his pink mustache, became his look. "Oh dear dear district attorney, they are gone. I have taken them. They are a part of me."

The banging continued, and using a spike made of the ooze of its own body, the entity impaled the TV, destroying it in one blow. The district attorney, gone in a flash. And the masked entity gains a new ornament. His mask flashed once again, and revealed to he a blank slate.

Wearing that face is how the entity leaves, laughing all the while.

[kazooie]

I am poooor and I need an air conditioner so fuckin bad... like I think we’ll have just enough to get a portable air conditioner which will do for now, but I might have to.. not eat for a week or so. Maybe that’s exaggerating a little but ha ha turns out paying more rent means having less money.

I’ve been meaning to sell some shit but I can’t decide which is most profitable and I get so ADHD about it all, I don’t wanna burn myself out on something that might not sell, you know? But I already have a few furby eyechip sets made up, and I was maybe gonna do some furby stickers...

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 24.08.17 lb

lmao this poor servant, having to work for these absolute crazies. 😔😔😔

great, anika’s picked a greaaaaaat time to go into a fugue state. 😒😒😒

how do you know you’ve lost? you didn’t even go look near the fucking pool yet. 🙄🙄🙄

THANK GOD. THANK THE LORD ABOVE. NOW DID IT HAVE TO TAKE THIS FUCKING LONG, SHIVAAY? YOU COULD HAVE FUCKING DONE THIS 3 WEEKS AGO. 😣😣😣

also, of course this extra fucker went and set up a table and all the fucking fairy lights available in the indian subcontinent. 😆😆😆

gauri be repping #teamBadeBhaiyya as usual.  😊😊😊

omfg anika go look by the fucking pool already instead of being a fucking idiot. 😑😑😑

why the fuckkkkkkkkkkkk would you LEAVE the place? god shivaaay, you’re soooo damn stooopid. 😫😫😫

lmaooooooo anika’s full-on bollywood running. is ghar mein rehte rehte yeh bhi kaafi filmy ho gayi hai.  🙄🙄🙄

nopeeeeee. the ring is gone. COZ SOMEONE WAS FUCKING STUPID ENOUGH TO LEAVE IT THERE UNSUPERVISED. 😒😒😒

oh anikaaaaaaaaa. 😥😥😥

vikram, you tall, hot, marathon-running bastard. *shakes fist at him* 😠😠😠

how did he even know the code between these two about the ring? 🤔🤔🤔

poor naive billu. poooooooor poooor billu. 😔😔😔

anika be like, no ring, no problem. TIME FOR ME TO DECK UP IN MY NEETA LULLA FLAMENCO OUTFIT. ALL TEH GOLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PUT IT ON ME!!!!!!!! MAKE ME LOOK LIKE I GOT TO SECOND BASE WITH KING MIDAS, BITCHHH!!!!!!!!!!! ✨✨✨😤😤😤✨✨✨

ugh i hate that lehenga skirt so much. it’s so ugly and even the fabric looks cheap and tackier compared to the rest of the outfit. 🤢🤢🤢

lmao neeta lulla herself is here. 😆😆😆

anika’s gone from mournful and mopey INSTANTLY ECSTATIC seeing neeta, coz who the f needs a man when you can be friends with someone who can hook you up with AMAZING CLOTHES. 😎😎😎

lmao ok neeta is a terrible actor and i am fwding coz too much michmichi. 😬😬

neeta’s gone and time for anika to be sad again, coz she remembered the existence of men and that she’s heterosexual. same, sis. #same 😞😞😞

lmao poor shivaay. justtttttt can’t catch a break these days. 😬😬😬

nice parallel to the time she threw paani on him before the first wedding with tia. 😊😊😊

shivaay so happy, that he’s not even that mad at getting paanika’d. gently asking her what is up. 😚😚😚

comic music is veryyyyyyyy out of place here. this is not THAT type of scene. 😐😐😐

poor billu. he’s so confused. 😫😫😫

UGH I AM HATING HOW THIS FUCKING SCENE IS BEING PLAYED AS COMIC. THIS IS THE WORST WRITING I’VE SEEN IN THIS SHOW EVER. EVERRRRRR. 😡😡😡

more foreshadowing about the ghutno ke bal thing. this shit better happen. i swear to god don’t even play with me like this. 😤😤😤

ok, he meant the “go marry vikram” thing flippantly, as kiiiiiiiiind of a joke. 😧😧😧

the whole fam has suddenly apparated outta nowhere. 😶😶😶

om looks to be silently but very obviously #teamAnika 😆😆😆

LMAO ANIKA DRAGGING VIKRAM OUTTA THERE 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

everyone like: 

LMAO SHIVAAY IS LIKE I AM SICK AND TIREDDDDDDD OF ALL YOU FUCKING CRAZY PPL IN MY LIFE, FUCK THIS SHIT I’M GOING TO GO BE A MONK IN SOME MOUNTAIN MONASTERY 😫😫😫😤😤😤

pinkyyyyy always down to party. i love the spirit. 😊😊😊

WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS RUVYA WEDDING YOU REALLY GONNA PLAY MY GIRL SAUMYA LIKE THIS HUH??????? ACTUALLY FUCK THIS FUCKING PAIRING. 😠😠😠😤😤😤

...what’s wrongggg with anika? where the fuck does she think she’s going with vikram? 😣😣😣

more comedy music... this is just really confusing to me. 😕😕😕

lmao billllllu, he’s just like I SWEAR TO GOD I DID ALL THE RIGHT THINGS THIS TIME PLEASE DON’T YELL AT ME!!!!! 😩😩😩😩

lmaooooooo om is like i didn’t even say anything, but billu is like IT WAS YOUR FACE. YOUR FACE WAS MEAN. 😥😥😥😥

president of Bade Bhaiyya’s Welfare and Khushiyaan Committee is here to take charge and make things right, so just shut up and play along, husband. 😊😊😊😌😌😌

oh sahil’s here too, to support gauri didi. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

hahaha, shivaay’s extremely betrayed look at sahil’s paltiiiii. et tu, champ? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

lmao “jeeju”. 

bulbul adding salt to wound by very helpfully explaining. 😆😆😆

omfggggggggg sahillllllllll, the man is already down, don’t kick him in the balls like this with the height thing! 😂😂😂😂

tod phod shuru. 😗😗😗

LMAO I AM HONESTLY CACKLING AT PINKY’S GLEE TODAY. IT’S INFECTIOUS. 😆😆😆

aaaaaand vikram has gone rogue. 😕😕😕

anika is so damn stupid, honestly. she’s not even slightly alarmed at the fact that this man she doesn’t know that well has brought her to some shadyass godown and she’s just lapsed into pontification. idiot girl, be calling 911!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU HAVE ZERO SELF PRESERVATION INSTINCTS 😣😣😣

vikram be like, sorry i can’t hear you over how awesome my secret wedding plan is. i am a genius! 😎😎😎

damn, that is a pretty mandap. (is that the same gazebo that shivika had the romantic moment in during the whole kidnapping track tho? 🤔🤔🤔) 

meanwhile, shivaay is single handedly killing the magazine industry by ripping every issue in the house. 😐😐😐

hey asshole, maybe some of us in the house didn’t get a chance to read the latest issue yet coz the rest of us have these little things called JOBS. 😒😒😒

LMAOOOOOOOOOOO OM. YOU’RE SUCH AN ASSHOLE. i fucking love it and have never wanted to kiss you more. 😚😚😚😚😍😍😍

bulbul has now switched teams and is now in #teamBhaujai. 😈😈😈

LMAO SHIVAAY’S FACE AT ALL OF HIS FAM SUPPORTING ANIKA AND CALLING THEMSELVES HER MAAYKA. 😂😂😂 

SUHAAG RAAT!!!!!!!!!!! THESE SAVAGES. THEY WERE NEVER THIS CONCERNED AND HELPFUL WHEN SHIVAAY WANTED A SUHAAG RAAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE’S BEEN TRYING TO SEAL THE DEAL FOR LIKE 5 MONTHS NOW, YOU FUCKERS! 😩😩😩😩😩

excuse me, i’m dying at bulbul’s casual hand on omki’s arm. I NEED THEM TO MAKE OUT ALREADY PLEASE GOD!!!!!!! 😍😍😍💘💘💘

anika still valiantly believing the best about vikram here. what a beautiful idiot our girl is. 😐😐😐

yaaas my queen ragini is here, and quite honestly, looking like 🔥🔥🔥

ragini and vikram making sultryyyyyyyyy moon eyes at each other over anika’s head. maaaan, you two get married!!!! #vikIni 💖💖💖

lmao ragini speaks the truth. how many sautans are good enough to find you a replacement husband that’s BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL? anika, where’s your damn gratitude? 😒😒😒

anika tried to get to ragini by throwing the fact that shivaay doesn’t love her in her face, only to be told “yeh meri problem hai, tumhari nahi, i’ll manage. tum itna kyun uchchal rahi ho?” DUDE I LOVE RAGINI 😆😆😆

ANIKA YOU FUCKING IDIOT CALL THE FUCKING POLICE INSTEAD OF SHIVAAY LORD WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU 😩😩😩

Awareness™ works for stupid tiny things like tripping and falling also? 🤔🤔🤔 

yes anika, by all means, just lie there on the floor, taking your own sweet time. 😒😒😒

yeah ok vikram, that actually does nothing to a phone? stomp on it harder, fool. 🙄🙄🙄

“anika needs me.” 

pfttttttttttttttt. what she actually needs is for all men to leave her alone for a while, so she can get 10 seconds of mental peace. 😒😒😒

om pretending to be useful since the other two sprung into action. 😆😆😆

isn’t bhavya on some action-packed mission of her own? how the fuck is she gonna do two things at once? 🤔🤔🤔

“let’s go.” 

WHERE THO????? 😕😕😕

oh yeah, suddenly remembered that there’s actually a poor, concerned child sitting there. 😐😐😐

abbe oh, jitna usko hona tha, tune hi kiya hai. abhi bade vaade kar raha hai. dialogue maarna bandh kar aur chalta ban. 😒😒😒

“MAIN AA RAHA HOON ANIKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

OUFF. TOO FUCKING FILMY. 😂😂😂

also nakuul either needs to sleep more, or get better concealer. 😕😕😕

today in bhavya is the worst fucking cop ever... 🙄🙄🙄

ok whatever, do not care. fwding.

ouff, tejVi garbage too. ughhhhhhhhh. 😫😫😫

IS THAT MY QUEEN, THE APPLE OF MY EYE, MY FAVT FACE STEALER EVERRRRR?!?!?! 😯😯😯

YES, IT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

... am i supposed to care that sultan isn’t a man, but a woman with the most glorious hair i’ve ever seen? like holy shit girl, tell me your secrets! 😯😯😯😯😯

om, you better step up your game. there’s someone here to beat you in the most beautiful hair game. 💁🏽💁🏽💁🏽

the ADORABLE face of a murderer. god i love her so so much. 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

can i have a spinoff, where svetlana just goes around murdering stalkers and rapists while looking this fabulous? please. i’d pay good money to watch it. 😫😫😫

WELL DONE, SVETLANA, INDEED!!!!! *gets down on my knees and thanks the lord she exists* 😌😌😌🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

lmaooooooo ragini getting on vikram’s case all exasperatedly. 😂😂😂

god, the rescue mission looks like such a cringey overdramatic fucking mess. i’m just sooooo over this track. end it alreadyyyyyyyyy. 😐😐😐

not before i get my michmichi-laden snort-giggles from the lambu v/s tingu fight though! 🤣🤣🤣