#life is meaningless but also okay sometimes

[the-brainrot-central]

Who up writing mpreg rn

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♡ ฿Ⱡ₳₦₭ ₴₱₳₵Ɇ ♡

♡ Pairings: frat boy!jaehyun x chubby!fem!reader, frat boy!johnny x chubby!fem!reader

♡ Genre: college au/angst/fluff/smut

♡ Summary: Jaehyun has made it a habit of playing with your heart. One day he loves you, the next he hates you, with nothing in between. Growing tired of his games, you find your attention drifting somewhere else. Toward his roommate and frat brother Johnny to be exact.

[Part Two Here 🖤]

♡ Word Count: 2.1k-ish

♡ Warnings: fuckboy Jaehyun in his full villain era (for now), voyeurism, two couples having sex in the same room (not an orgy), technically unprotected sex by way of protection not being explicitly mentioned, a lil spanking, partying, kissing, mentions of drinking, casual/meaningless sex, sexual fantasies, everyone's a lil morally gray, heartbreak & that's all bbys.

♡ A/N: I had a bloodlust for something angsty and ya know this did a pretty good job at satisfying it. It also satisfied by craving for something sweet so I'll keep my fingers crossed it does both for y'all too. 🖤

It was exciting at first. Weekends at the frat house partying with Jaehyun. No rules. No limitations. Everything a girl could want just waiting to be given to her if she asked. And the sex? The sex was incredible. Jaehyun could be a real asshole sometimes but he always knew how to make you come so hard your ears were ringing. 

You knew from the start that it’d be delusional to think you were anything more to him than a pretty face and a dependable fuck. Jaehyun’s killer bone structure and gorgeous features make him what one might imagine a fairytale prince to be. All the girls on campus dream of being with him and he knows it. He loves it.

That man has an ego bigger than his cock which is unfortunately rather large. There’s so much of himself floating around in his head that there’s just no room for anyone else. Still he has his endearing moments, ones that make a girl feel special, and that’s what keeps you coming back when you begin to think better of tolerating his bullshit.

That’s why you’re here tonight, knees digging into his mattress, cheek pressed to his pillow, as he fucks you from behind. You feel it, the force of his hips snapping against your ass, his cock pulsing deep in your core. But it feels like nothing. It’s like getting a tooth pulled after the dentist has numbed you up real good. The force of the movement is there but the feeling’s gone.

A few feet away another bed creaks as a girl you’ve only met once or twice rides Jaehyun’s frat brother Johnny like one of those mechanical bulls. This isn’t abnormal. During these parties sex happens any time, anywhere, and that almost always includes being in the same room together. But you can’t help feeling like a pervert for stealing a few glances of the adjacent couple.

Jaehyun never formally introduced you to Johnny. Come to think of it, he's never formally introduced you to anyone. It was Johnny who introduced himself one night when you’d had a few too many drinks for your own good and ended up hunched over the toilet with Jaehyun nowhere to be found. 

Johnny sat with you for hours making sure you were hydrated and feeding you snacks until he was sure you were okay. You can’t for the life of you remember what was said. You can only recall that you felt comfortable and safe with him. It was enough to make you develop the tiniest crush that’s only been made worse by how sweet he’s been to you since.

Jaehyun slaps your ass, interrupting your train of thought. Almost simultaneously Johnny begins to caress the other girl’s hips. There’s so much tenderness in the way he touches her and you envy it. You wish Jaehyun could give you even a fraction of that. Just once. Pulling the girl in for a kiss, Johnny wraps his arms around her, holding her close to his chest. With her head nestled in the side of his neck, he cradles her gently as he lifts into her at a slow, rhythmic pace. 

You imagine that’s you, not being hammered into but actually feeling something, and magically the friction of Jaehyun’s cock rubbing your walls feels good. In fact, far better than it ever has before. You let out a moan, a whisper, “Aah, oh god.” Jaehyun takes notice of it, loving the way you clench too much not to hit that sweet spot again and again. He’s so distracted by the delicious jiggling of your body, his vision curtained by messy dark brown hair, that he can’t see that he isn’t the only one captivated by you.

But you notice. Johnny’s staring back at you now, his eyes glued to yours as he takes in all those pretty faces you make. This isn’t the first time he’s watched you either. He and Jaehyun were roommates long before you came into the picture. Johnny’s seen more than a few girls naked in Jaehyun’s bed but you’re the only one he’s cared to sneak a peek at. The crush you have on him is so mutual. How you never picked up on it he doesn’t know but it’s oh so obvious now.

The longing behind Johnny’s eyes is immense, luring you deeper into his gaze until he’s all you see. Setting your bodies on autopilot with your respective partners, you begin to quietly explore each other. Your minds indulge in every dirty thought you’ve had about each other. Thoughts you’d suppressed out of fear that you were doing something wrong. 

You find yourself getting wetter than you’ve been all night, walls dripping twice as much as they hug Jaehyun’s cock. “Damn, you feel so good, baby” Jaehyun praises, planting kisses down the middle of your back. He shifts to a position he knows will have you trembling and you let out the sexiest moan. So sexy it makes Johnny’s cock twitch inside of the other girl, heat washing over both of your bodies. 

“You’re so fucking cute” Johnny whispers in a way that seems to be for the girl in his arms but is meant for you and only you. His face lights up like the 4th of July at every broken moan or arch of your back. You can tell how badly he wishes the pussy warming his cock right now were yours and you get the filthiest rush out of that.

Before you know it the pressure inside you has reached its peak and your legs are shaking, knees threatening to give out from under you. A faint smile creeps across Johnny’s face and he mouths to you, “Come.” And you do, as if on command. Burying your face in the pillow, you bite down on the fluffy cotton and let it fill your cheeks. It’s a gag of sorts, a desperately needed one incase you should cry out the wrong name on accident.

You know in your heart that even by frat boy standards you’ve crossed a line. You’ve stumbled into territory there’s no coming back from. But when it feels this good it’s difficult to want to turn back anyway. 

“You’re overreacting. It’s not like you’re my girlfriend.” 

You know this to be true, Jaehyun isn’t your boyfriend, but it hurts all the same to wake up to him texting another girl. Your heart sank when you rolled over this morning, still in his arms, to find him making plans to meet up with her tonight.

It was so blatant, he didn’t even attempt to hide what he was doing, and maybe that’s what hurts most of all. You thought he cared enough about you to at least pretend he wasn’t playing the absolute fuck out of you. It’s clear now that you thought wrong. 

“You’re such an asshole, you know that?” you shout, gathering your things from the floor, the sheet from his bed still draped around your naked body. 

A fully dressed Jaehyun casually searches the dresser for his keys, the smile on his face so cocky you want to slap it off. “Right, I’m going to the gym. You know how to see yourself out right?” 

Picking up one of your heels, you channel all your strength into throwing it at his head. “I never wanna see you again!” 

Jaehyun opens the bedroom door in time to take cover behind it, the heel of your shoe leaving a dent where it would’ve hit him. “Ooh, feisty” he teases, cracking the door to throw you a wink, “Save some of that for next time, hmm?”

There’s so much you want to say but none of it will change anything. He walks away from you like it’s nothing and that’s precisely what you feel like. Nothing. Unable to hold back anymore, you burst into tears where you stand, gathering up some of the sheet to sob quietly into. You can’t recall the last time you cried like this. A chest tightening, nose dripping, lip quivering type of cry that makes you want to double over in pain. 

“Hey, come here” a voice whispers, the rasp of sleep still hanging over it.

You feel a tug on the back of the sheet and turn to see Johnny sitting up in bed, one hand rubbing his barely open eyes while the other clings to the sheet around you.

“I’m sorry if I woke you up” you apologize, too embarrassed to make eye contact, “I’ll just get my things and—”

“No, come here” he insists, pulling you closer to his bed, “Come lay with me.”

Something in you says to resist it—you shouldn’t be crawling into bed with Jaehyun’s roommate—but Johnny’s already taking you by the hand, guiding you down into the empty spot beside him. No words are spoken as he pulls the soft blanket over the two of you, tucking it at your side to keep you warm.

His head hits the pillow, heavy lids closing, as he pulls you into his chest. There’s tension at first, on your part only. A hesitance to allow yourself to fully relax into the gentle embrace you’ve been desperately pining for. But the longer he holds you, his palm massaging your lower back in soothing figure eights, the more you soften.

“You don’t deserve this, you know?” he finally says when your tears have subsided and your breathing has evened out enough for you to speak. There’s exhaustion in those words as he says them, giving the impression that this is something he’s wanted to ask you for a long time. 

“Is this gonna be a lecture?” you sniffle, nervously patting the tears from the dips between his muscles, “Because I really don’t need a lecture right now.” 

Johnny laughs, letting out a yawn, “Nah, it’s too early for a lecture. My brain’s not heated up yet.” 

“Not heated up yet? What does that even mean?” you giggle, leaning to look up at him, your nose scrunched in confusion. Johnny opens his eyes, staring back at you with those starry brown orbs, and you’re transported back to the way you felt last night. If you thought his gaze made you want to melt from afar, it’s reducing you to volcanic ash at this distance. 

“Well, it’s like, when you first wake up your brain’s cold. Your thoughts are all jumbled so you’ve gotta wait a little, let it heat up” Johnny explains, the tips of his sable hair kissing your face.  

“You’re, uh…” you stutter, searching for the perfect word, “Really…interesting? Yeah, you’re interesting, Johnny Suh.” 

The most genuine smile takes over that handsome face as he lets out a joyful squeak, sincerely flattered by your comment. “Yeah? Well, so are you. You’re really interesting and cool and cute. I did mean that last night. You are cute.”

You tuck your head, trying to hide a smile of your own, but Johnny caresses your cheek, bringing you right back where he wants you. “Why do you let him treat you like that?” he asks without the slightest bit of judgment. Your smile fades as you contemplate a question you aren’t even sure you know the answer to. You file through 1001 possibilities before coming to the raw, painful truth. 

“I was trying to prove something, I guess” you confess, feeling an odd sense of relief at admitting this to him and yourself. “I thought if I could obtain the unattainable it’d be proof that I was special.”

Johnny scoffs, rolling his eyes, “Jaehyun? Unattainable? I could fuck him if I complemented him enough.” 

“Thanks, that makes me feel so much better” you huff, beginning to regret that moment of vulnerability. 

“No, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it like that. I just mean that he isn’t one of those people that can appreciate when they have something special.” 

You shrug in defeat, letting your fears tumble freely from your lips, “Yeah, I don’t know if any guy can at this point.”

“So you think we’re all the same?” he asks, tilting your head to let your lips brush his. His lips are like static, making the little hairs on your arm stand on end. Your heart’s running a marathon and the butterflies in your stomach are throwing fits. This can’t be happening. Only it is.

You swallow hard, inhaling the scent of the fresh morning air meddled with his cologne. “Well, I…I mean no one’s really shown me any different.” 

Johnny presses his lips to yours, lingering there for a moment to savor the warmth of your kiss. “Can you give it some time?” he whispers, fingers charting a course across the curve of your hip to take your hand into his. 

“It or you, Johnny?” you ask, silently begging him not to say a thing if it’s not something he means.

“Hmm,” he hums, bringing your hand up to gently kiss your inner wrist, your palm, your fingertips, “Me.” 

[orcasoul]

Joel Miller Imagine #5

Warnings: sexual themes (under 18's DNI)

Word Count: 818

Jackson boyfriend Joel who took longer to settle into Jackson than you and Ellie did. Who, even though there's no immediate danger, always keeps an eye on you when you're out and about (old habits die hard). Who gives a death glare to any man he catches checking you out, silently signifying that you are off limits. Who is slowly becoming more comfortable showing affection to you in public, no matter what some may think of your age gap of twenty years. Who fiercely loves the little family you've all become.

Jackson boyfriend Joel who wakes up every morning thankful that the three of you made it here in one piece. Who takes a moment some mornings to watch your peaceful expression as you sleep, chuckling quietly when you mumble something incoherently while dreaming (you can be adorably vocal when you're asleep). Who wakes you up for breakfast by nibbling at your ear lobe, causing you to giggle and hide under the covers. Who sometimes still can't believe the simple, domestic life you all get to live now, knowing it should never be taken for granted. Who will do everything he can to ensure Jacksons' prosperity -patrols, building maintenance, farming - anything, if it means you actually get to live and not just survive.

Jackson boyfriend Joel who is still adjusting to community life; after so many years in different QZ's, where everyone kept their heads down and business private, it's quite the change to be surrounded by decent, friendly people who aren't out to take advantage and exploit each other. Who has to remind himself that people approaching you and Ellie no longer means danger, but at the same time, he's ready to defend at a moments notice. Who smiles to himself when he sees your effort to integrate and realises that if you're pushing yourself out of your comfort zone to become part of this society, then he should do the same.

Jackson boyfriend Joel who still has nightmares about losing his daughter, but now the nightmares also include you and Ellie. Who sometimes wakes up silently in a cold sweat and after the reassurance that you're okay, sleeping soundly next to him, he gets up to quietly check on Ellie in the next room before settling back down. Who sometimes is awoken by your voice calling his name and your hand stroking his cheek. Who lets you pull his head to rest on your chest as you lay down; the soothing sound of your heart beating against his ear quelling the fear and tension plaguing him.

Jackson boyfriend Joel who always makes sure you're both on patrol together - wether it's just the two of you or a group - if you're going beyond the walls he's going with you. Who instantly reverts to the survivor he's been for the past twenty years when on patrol, listening (with his good ear), watching and waiting for any and every possibility, all while keeping close to you. Who fears sometimes that life in Jackson might make you both unintentionally complacent and that's something neither of you can afford.

Jackson boyfriend Joel who often attends social events, mostly for you and Ellie. Who'd promised himself that he'd give you both the life you deserve and if that means putting up with meaningless chit chat from the locals, so be it. Who enjoys seeing you make friends with other women your age (after all you need more than his grumpy old ass). Who groans in amused frustration when you pull him up to slow dance with the other couples. Who knows exactly how you get when you're tipsy, your eager eyes slowly dragging down his neck to his exposed collarbone, teeth grazing your plush bottom lip and sending his blood rushing south. Who discreetly follows you to the toilets after you've "excused yourself" and moments later is buried to the hilt inside your pulsating pussy as he fucks up into you against the cubical door, while you bite down on his neck to keep from screaming. Who, because of you, feels like a horny teenager all over again.

Jackson boyfriend Joel who's chest swells with pride when he sees how close you and Ellie have become with Tommy and Maria. Who never thought he'd have anything close to resembling a family again, but here he is with a second chance of having exactly that; of course he feels the pang of regret when his thoughts drift towards Sarah and even though she's not physically present, she's still here, treasured safely within his heart. Who has begun to realise that calling himself your boyfriend feels to simple and casual a statement compared to the depth of his love and gratitude towards you. Who wants to spend the rest of his life making you as happy as you make him. Who very soon will make it official by asking you a most important question.

[daisys-reality]

♡ꜞ˖ ᴘɪᴄᴋ-ᴀ-ᴄᴀʀᴅ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ

What do you fear as a shifter? How should you deal with it? 🍞

⌇ reality shifting themed tarot reading | masterlist | voting

pile one

Overall, you seem to struggle with taking ownership of the decisions you make. And you’re quick to overthink things and together this causes a lot of inner conflict. It seems that one major thing here in regards to your shifting journey is that you fear is being stuck in limbo, you might be anxious over how long it takes and how you might possibly miss opportunities because of this ‘delay’. As others (seem to) move forward, you fear being left behind by the world. This makes you ponder a lot about what direction your life (/shifting journey) is going in… over and over again… and it makes you feel confused, unsure and hesitant. You need to remember that you are the master of your own destiny. Don’t try to blame ‘the universe’ if your situation is a result of choices that you’ve made. 

Sometimes it might feel intimidating to take the first step toward resolving the inner conflict and its roots but that doesn’t mean progress isn’t possible. You can break this frustrating ‘feeling of stagnation’ with some creativity, courage, and clarity! Just do whatever you can to make YOURSELF feel like you’re (more) ready to face whatever is coming towards you - whether you review past DR ideas and scripts or indulge more into DR related topics etc. The point is that you should counterattack your overthinking nature - if you feel that you start spiraling again, do something to assure yourself and to get on track again! Your mind will often have conflicting thoughts but don’t let it ruin your decision making skills.

On a side note, you might also fear getting hurt in your DR - whether mentally, emotionally or physically. There is some kind of imbalance or gap between mind and heart or just misaligned values. If you feel like you’re forcing yourself to experience things that you actually don’t want to experience (or that make you lowkey uncomfortable), try to think about where this stems from. I feel like you might not even be aware of the fact that you’re doing this… Re-evaluate your choices and address these misalignments (inner conflicts) to regain your balance back and to clear up the mental fog. Trying to develop a deeper understanding of your DR self,  their values and beliefs might also help you in understanding what you actually want to experience there. Good luck!

pile two

This is a bit tricky but i think you might fear becoming or being emotionally immature, not wanting to come to terms with your feelings, being defensive about it and lying to yourself or trying to deceive yourself that you’re okay/strong/healthy etc. through senseless meaningless pursuits/things (ex. casual flings, shopping, eating - leading to dependencies/addictions). Frightened and threatened by your own sensitivity, fearing losing control over your emotions, you might try to conceal your insecurities by presenting a distant and uncaring (or overly strong, pretty, overpowered = flawless=unreachable) facade to the outer world. In fact, you might fear being controlled by emotions (through yourself or others) or becoming someone who misuses their emotional intelligence. This might stem from past trauma where you experienced emotional dynamics that were used to manipulate or to exert control. Overall, there is a need for setting boundaries, learning how to be more resilient against emotional manipulations, and becoming more emotionally stable and confident/free/autonome through healthy self expression and management of emotions.

You might also fear not achieving the desired level of success, stability or happiness. You yourself might even worry about becoming too materialistic, too arrogant or losing touch with other values the more time you spend as a (limitless) shifter. While you understand how lucky you are to get to know about shifting in this life, how many opportunities this brings and how it can provide security and comfort, it might not necessarily be solely ‘enough’ to lead to a fulfilling life. You’re concerned about how to balance all these things to not turn into extremes. Deep down, it’s very important to you that you maintain your integrity but you’re afraid of not being strong or capable enough to do so in the face of these limitless opportunities and freedom that shifting entails. Trying to focus more on quality than quantity while choosing your path (your journeys, DRs, your background, your life etc.) will bring you closer to a fulfilling life. 

pile three

You seem to fear discontentment and dissatisfaction at a personal level. You fear that all these experiences will just lead to apathy, disinterest and overall detachment from life or from being alive! You worry that life will just feel boring in the end and you’re scared of what that means. This might be triggering for some but some of you might ultimately fear coming to a point where you’d rather want to d*e then stay alive. 

I can see that deep down you take this very seriously and you have respect for the freedom and limitlessness that shifting offers you but you know how we humans are and how fragile our mind can become just because we’re not ‘prepared’ or ready yet for what we have to face in our lives. 

If you had the choice, you would like to always have a direction or an end destination in mind, you might hate living an aimless life. You don’t want to stagnate; you want to always progress. And while you hate feeling like you’re trapped in your circumstances, you oftentimes stay unwilling to make sacrifices for change because you fear wasting these sacrifices or missing opportunities later on because of these sacrifices. There might be an overall resistance to letting go or a reluctance to see things from a new perspective. I feel like you're someone that would hate being a people pleaser and not having any independent thoughts - becoming narrow minded like others (in your opinion). You don’t want to bend down or surrender. And coming back to the beginning, you fear reaching a point in your life as a shifter where you feel like you have no further direction, where you feel pushed into a corner, forced to start living like the others and adapting their mindset because your way of doing things led you to a stalemate. 

You need to remember that this perception you have is influenced by your attitude and opinions and is not completely free of prejudice or illusions. While some of these imaginings might be a possibility, it is important not to lose yourself in those or rather to not restrict yourself by those imposed limits. Why think about the end when you haven’t even fully started your journey? Stay open-minded. Seek stability in this overwhelming chaos of opportunities. Release outdated attachments, learn as you go and do so with flow -  learn about what makes you happy and what fulfills you. There is no need to think about the afterwards when you haven’t even come close to the end. Just think about the next step while taking care of yourself, your health and happiness. You won’t be hanging aimlessly in the air, you’re more than capable to assert control and structure in your life, at any time. But try to do so with integrity, flexibility and empathy to ensure that your ‘order’ does not become oppression (of yourself).

[misscrawfords]

I was listening to Pride and Prejudice on my drive back from my mother's today and it's been so long since I've actually read the novel as opposed to engaged with one or other adaptation...

Goodness, it's good, isn't it? And Elizabeth is so much more complex a character than she is often presented in adaptations.

The thing that was standing out to me today - I was listening to from when Mr. Collins proposes to Charlotte and I stopped just when Elizabeth was talking to Colonel Fitzwilliam at Rosings - was the chapter which is just Jane and Elizabeth talking about Bingley. This gets cut from adaptations or so condensed to be meaningless, but it's incredible. It's just a whole chapter of the sisters chewing over why Bingley ghosted Jane (for lack of a better term) and what Caroline's motivations were and the thing that gets me is that they're both right. Jane is right that Bingley can't be blamed for being a friendly young man and that he had no malicious intentions but Elizabeth is also right that young men can be thoughtless in their dealings with women who have less freedom than them and their thoughtlessness can do real hurt. (She's also right about Caroline, of course.) It struck me as such a modern issue. Maybe I've just been thinking about the unwitting hurt that thoughtless young men can cause recently, but everything is so complicated. Bingley is a flake who makes a mistake with regards to Jane but he's also a genuinely lovely young man who makes it right in the end - he's still on his own journey through life which he will continue with Jane. Jane herself lets her desire to see the best in others cause her to see friendship where it isn't, but being deceived in a friend is not so uncommon, is it? And she's not stupid or weak. Heck, she endures her heartbreak being talked about openly by her mother in public for months silently and without rancour. And she does it all without ever resenting Bingley! Jane's the strongest character in the whole novel and an inspiration to the rest of us - FIGHT ME on this!

The other thing I really picked up on was what an important moment in Elizabeth's character development Charlotte's engagement is. It actually kind of breaks my heart - her best friend makes a life choice that she can't support but has to and nothing will ever be the same again between them. It's the first dent into Elizabeth's world view that forces her to see that people are different from her and can make different decisions and this is okay and not just something she can laugh at. It's so relatable in terms of life events - when a close friend marries and then when they have a baby, these things absolutely still do alter friendships. Elizabeth gets over it and even enjoys seeing Charlotte in Hunsford but we are frequently reminded by the narrator that the previous confidences they enjoyed will never be the same again. It's a really big moment for Elizabeth and really the first event in the novel to start to shake her foundations of her comfortable existence. The other two are Bingley's desertion of Jane and Wickham's decision to pursue Mary King over her. By the time she goes to Hunsford, she is prepared in a way for the final massive shock to the foundations of The World According to Lizzy Bennet, not that she knows it. Such is growing up.

And OMG Lady Catherine is SO vulgar and inappropriate! She is a direct parallel to Mrs. Bennet and the rest of the Bennets. Just as Elizabeth feels accute embarrassment at the Netherfield Ball, Mr. Darcy is feeling exactly the same at Rosings. Beautifully done. But their awareness of what is appropriate behaviour is something that unifies Darcy and Elizabeth even if Darcy massively fails to behave like a human around Elizabeth. Pride and Prejudice is such an expose and examination of "how to behave in social situations". There is nobody who doesn't come under scrutiny and pretty much every type of behaviour is gone over with a fine tooth comb.

Sometimes I feel almost ashamed when people ask me what my favourite novel is and I say "Pride and Prejudice" because it's such a damn cliche. I should say something heavier or more obscure or at least I should say it's Persuasion, the "thinking girl"'s favourite Austen. But P&P is so special to me on so many levels and you know what? It is a MASTERFULLY written book.

[matchaelette]

GIF from pinterest

when exhausted jungkook is equal to a cranky jungkook but you’re just a simple girl

summary: idol!jk and oc!ash, established relationship, both ash and jungkook are working very hard and they’re exhausted to the point where it feels like they might drop dead soon. kook gets frustrated because ash won’t pay him enough attention but soon she ends up pampering his majesty’s ass anyways. also, there’s a backdrop on ash’s life; she is a musician and a part of iu’s band.

genre: pure fluff.

warning: none. go crazy children

word count: 4.5k

notes: I know I know, like, a part of iu’s band? isn’t that a bit too much? nah it’s not. I have enough reality chasing me irl, let me have my fun here. also, I hope ya’ll are doing okay. a new year comes with a lot of expectations and responsibilities so don’t be too hard on yourselves <3 happy 2024 peeps :D

“what. do you want. jeon jungkook.”

“ooh she used the full name, have I been a bad boy?”, the words tumble down your boyfriend’s lips with a dramatic flare, followed by a mischievous twinkle in his eyes, unfazed by the sheer force of your previous sentence, “what do you mean what do I want? attention and affection, of course.”

not that you’re counting, but what you assume to be the nineteenth sigh tonight, leaves your lips. your eyelids were so heavy that you doubted if even a fire in the building could wake you up. exhaustion tore at your limbs and you didn’t have the power to lift your eyelids to shoot a glare at your golden retriever boyfriend, let alone muster enough energy to face him and provide him... what did he say again? attention and affection.

you’ve been tirelessly working throughout the week, barely having time to eat or sleep. almost every day you’re coming back home at four in the morning, when jungkook is sound asleep, and leaving again in three hours, when he is yet to wake up. it’s the first time in quite a few days that you came home at a reasonable hour and were tangled in the bed with a very much awake jungkook. but as much as you want to entertain him, your body does not seem willing to cooperate.

you’re a musician, and boy when you pursued a music career, you never thought it could ever make you tired. music has been your love and your life since you could remember and a very fundamental part of your life. whether it was humming random strings of sounds while having your diaper changed as a baby (your parents’ word) or singing meaningless lyrics to any tune you heard when you started talking (again, your parents’ word), your love for music has always just grown. you’re now a full-blown musician, having the privilege to work with all the a-rated musicians of the world. you are pretty much a regular member of iu’s band— iu being the living legend of korea and the forever-long crush of jungkook’s life— but you still worked with other artists from time to time, sometimes as a producer, sometimes as a composer.

throughout your high school years, you developed a reputation as the person who would randomly start humming during examinations, writing lyrics on her exam papers, and always playing instruments or plainly singing in every single school function. and if that wasn’t a wake-up call, getting scouted as a musician through your personal instagram was certainly one. it happened right during the end of high school when you were preparing for uni, and the single event changed everything in your life. you were scouted by an agency called bighit, and they convinced you to audition, intriguing you enough to skip school one day and show up in a rusty building in the gangnam district of seoul with a guitar hanging on your shoulder. impressed by your skills, they signed you up as a trainee.

it was one of the best things that happened in your life.

ironically, it was also where you met your boyfriend for the first time.

saying your parents weren’t happy when you decided to completely backtrack from uni and focus solely on music would be an understatement. you were always an exceptional student— part of the reason your teachers would always overlook you humming in class or using your projects as a canvas for your musical colors— and were supposed to major in business studies as your parents’ wishes. while it was never something you hated— in fact, you always thought that you’d rather be a super successful businesswoman if you couldn’t be a musician— but having your first choice being handed to you on a silver platter, you'd be a fool not to take it. your parents were enraged, they cut you off from the family entirely, but you were nothing if not stubborn. determined to make it, alone if you have to, you've worked your ass off for all these years to get into the position you’re in now, a place where your name is gold-plated in the music industry.

but success was never truly your goal. your goal was to simply stay immersed in a world of music and you can’t help but take pride of how far all alone. but working like your life depended on it became sort of a habit, sometimes to the point where a singular musical note could make you groan. you don’t sing as much as you used to back in high school, instead, you use up all your time to compose music and play the guitars for iu.

said idol is supposed to be having a comeback very soon, somewhere your boyfriend’s bandmate was also going to star— kim taehyung— and so work has been extra draining lately, with everyone trying to master every single detail and point.

“kook, stoooop”, you whine, burying your face in the soft pillow, waterfalls of hair obscuring your vision as you make a feeble attempt to wriggle out of jungkook’s grasp. but he is relentless. he rolls his eyes and manhandles you back into his arms, causing you to let out a small yelp as your back presses against his chest.

jungkook, himself, was tired as hell. while you were coming back at four in the morning, he was coming back at three, working equally hard as you. jungkook is always driven by his passions and he never hesitates to work hard for it, but despite that fact, this week has been particularly challenging, especially with the pressure of working on his own solo album. the lack of food and sleep was almost getting to him, leaving him irritable to the point where he almost snapped at the choreographer. although he apologized quickly, he noticed that he was in the mood where people pick up fights for no reason. he decided to just come back home and get some rest before something else could provoke him, but when he discovered you were at home as well, he couldn’t help but get clingy. after all, you guys haven’t properly talked for weeks.

and he missed you.

“c’mon, I can’t even see your face”, jungkook props himself up on his elbow, his breath gently fanning your face.

“we’ve already established the fact i’m pretty. let me sleep, kook.”

“aren’t pretty faces meant to be looked at?”

jungkook furrows his brows when he gets no answer from you. he blinks furiously to keep his own exhaustion at bay and studies your face to see if you’ve already drifted off to sleep. your eyes are closed, and he can feel the steady rhythm of your heart inside the hoodie of his that you’re wearing. he can also sense you’re not asleep though. not yet anyway.

“babeee”, jungkook lets out a high-pitched whimper and immediately yelps when you elbow him in the ribs but he isn’t sure which one strikes a nerve, the elbow or the words that follow.

“dude, would you please let me sleep? I am tired as fuck and I have to wake up early”, you grit your teeth in clear annoyance, not even bothering to open your eyes, “unlike some people”

jungkook feels a twinge of guilt, but he can also feel a surge of a new emotion. anger? before he can fully comprehend what is going on, inconsiderate words escape his mouth.

“so am I. but you don't see me complaining all the time.”

your eyes fly open. before you can fully discern their meaning of jungkook’s words, he moves away from you, retreating completely to his side of the bed and putting as much space between your bodies as possible. you use your last fragments of remaining energy to prop yourself up into a half-seated position to face him, but jungkook has already turned his back on you.

“what is that supposed to mean?”

silence.

“jungkook, what the hell was that supposed to mean?”

“go to sleep, okay?”, his quiet voice makes you falter and you immediately understand that he is angry. though for what, you don’t quite understand.

“jungkook, i’m sleepy, okay? and—”

“then sleep! no one’s stopping you now.”

“but you’re mad at me for being tired! how is that fair? i’ve been working like crazy—”

“geez, sorry for being unfair, ash”, sarcasm drips from jungkook’s voice and you don’t like that in the slightest, “I also have to wake up early, earlier than you in fact, so please let me sleep.”

an uncomfortable silence follows his sentence.

“alright”, you sigh and drop it after staring at his back for a few seconds. you don’t want to get into an argument now, not when both of you are on the verge of collapsing, prone to say things you don’t mean at all. you’d rather sleep and deal with it in the morning when both of you are well rested and not running on two hours of sleep and a shit ton of caffeine.

it’s not always you get to see this side of jungkook. anyone who knows him knows that the boy is crafted from starry skies and honeyed galaxies alone, always smiling a bit too easily and lighting everyone around him as bright as the evening star.

however, every time you see a crack at his easy, carefree demeanor, you can’t help but feel a sense of helplessness within. jungkook doesn’t get irritated often and certainly not easily, but when he does, his behavior takes a different turn. he doesn’t shout or scream or take his anger out on inanimate objects as you tend to do. instead, he completely shuts himself out of the world. every curt answer feels like a form of silent treatment, every word spoken laces itself with sarcasm, always hitting where it hurts the most. even though he never takes his anger out on you, you don’t like seeing him like this.

if you knew he would react like this, you would have given a little more effort to remain awake in his company. jungkook may be childish but he rarely behaves like this. and you’re just a simple girl, hopelessly in love with the boy who has his back turned to you.

“goodnight”, you draw closer to him and drape an arm around his waist hesitantly. when he doesn’t stir or reply, a dejected sigh escapes your lips. nonetheless, you tenderly wrap the blanket around him and nestle your face at the nape of his neck, inhaling the familiar scent of fresh linen and mint.

despite the fatigue draping your limbs, despite jungkook starting to softly snore within minutes, it takes you an entire hour to fall asleep.

you let out yet another groan as memories from last night come flooding back into your mind. it has been like that all day, the memories coming and going as they pleased, striking you with a sense of disappointment every time they do. jungkook was already gone when you woke up in the morning and despite knowing he had an early schedule, you couldn't help but feel downhearted.

you immediately checked your phone back then, hoping to find a message from him but much to your disappointment, there was none. both you and jungkook had quite hectic schedules, but it became an unspoken agreement in the house to update each other about your days ever since you moved in together. jungkook would always leave little neon post-its on the fridge with messages— reminder to eat something before you get coffee!!! and call me after you wake up, let’s get lunch together??? — whenever he left the house before you were up and vice versa. soon, the post-its turned into text messages because it was always easier in the rush of the mornings. jungkook would always wake up to texts from you— before you get mad, I did kiss you before leaving but you wouldn’t budge— and he would instantly call you to check if your schedules aligned and if he could pick you up after work.

but having no text from jungkook this morning could mean only one thing.

he is still mad.

despite being agitated because of your lack of basic human activities, you pushed aside those emotions and called him immediately. you got more worried when jungkook didn’t pick the phone up because you knew he wasn’t one to hold petty grudges. you reluctantly dragged yourself out of bed then, brushing and getting ready to face the day. now that you’ve had gained a few hours of rest, you realized how tired jungkook looked last night. you could almost hear the constant grumbles from his stomach that pointed out how hungry he was. But he kept saying that he didn’t have the energy to eat. you could see the swollen eyelids and the purple hue outlining it more clearly, how he walked unsteadily as if he was drunk.

jungkook called you back while you were on your way to work. you weren’t really surprised but it still dissipated some of your nerves. he explained that his phone was on silent and he didn’t see your call but his voice still sounded distant and his responses were short. he also mentioned that he might not come home tonight, hoping to squeeze in some extra practice hours.

he didn’t call you once for the rest of the day.

very un-jungkook of him.

and you were too busy to call him.

it is nearly midnight now. you find yourself inside your car, driving through the dimly lit streets of seoul. despite the hour, the city is bustling, alive with people and emotions. driving through the city always puts you at ease; you hated crowds but you loved observing people, the multitudes of emotions they go through every moment, making every one so much different than another but still intricately woven within love and life.

after the long day, you yearned for the warmth and comfort of your bed, considering skipping the shower part because that’s how drained you were. you didn’t eat anything all day, something that has become a routine now, save for the apple you grabbed while leaving the house in the morning. minus the seven-something cups of coffee.

yet you find yourself driving in the direction of the hybe studios.

you’re almost near the building when a sudden realization makes you click your tongue in annoyance. should have gotten some flowers. why did I not think of that before?

you park your car and make your way inside the extravagant building. the staff knew you well by now, both from your days as a trainee and your frequent visits to your boyfriend and his bandmates. you ascend to the top floor of the establishment, going straight toward one of the empty practice rooms jungkook loves to use whenever he is rehearsing on his own.

pushing the door open, you enter the room. the space is slightly dark, only illuminated with neon purple lights, ridiculously confirming your boyfriend’s presence to you. call it jungkook being jungkook, but your boyfriend hates harsh lights. you don’t doubt that he would happily reside in the darkness for the rest of his life if he was asked to.

you spot jungkook in the farthest corner of the room— hybe practice rooms are scarily huge— a blur of black sweats and bobbing hair, vigorously throwing hooks and uppercuts at the gray punching bag hanging in front of him. even from a distance you can see that he is completely absorbed in his own world, a side of him that you have come to know well over the years. this jungkook is full of energy and passion. this jungkook is the golden maknae of bts, putting his heart and soul into whatever he was working on, squeezing every last drop of capability, and surpassing every single one of his limits every minute. this is the boy who keeps on giving birth to beauty, elegance, and unparalleled talent.

you didn’t like to disrupt jungkook’s concentration when he was working so you decide to sit silently until he noticed your himself. however, concern washes over you when you see the lack of gloves in his hand. instead, his hands are wrapped with gauze and tape as he mercilessly throws jabs at the punching bag, and you can notice the blood seeping through the rips of the cloth around his knuckles.

“are you trying to piss me off on purpose?”, you hiss softly, walking towards him and putting your palm on his shoulder so as not to scare him. but jungkook yelps in shock anyways, bambi eyes wide and startled like a deer caught in front of headlights.

“ash?”

“why are you not wearing gloves?”, you take his hands into your own, flinching when you get a good look at it. his knuckles were visible through the torn cloth, red and angry, blood seeping through the gashes on his skin.

“sorry—”, jungkook throws you a sheepish glance, recovering from the initial shock, “—when did you come here? wait, why are you here?”

“to kick your ass”, you say, exasperated, “seriously jungkook, how hard is it to wear a glove? you just take the damn thing and squeeze your hand insi—”

“I did! but then it tore somehow”

you scowled.

“it’s true! look! I threw it on the ground when it ripped. it’s still there!”

“then don’t punch so hard!”

“but I have to train!”, jungkook pouted, hoping his cute facial expression would calm you down. you scowled more.

you huff, releasing his hands and making your way toward the line of closets in the back of the room. it’s where the first aid kits are usually kept. you know every practice room in the entire building has one or two of these because this is where most of the accidents happens. you can sense jungkook’s gaze following you but he remains mute.

getting what you need, you take a seat on the furnished floor and pat it, urging jungkook to do the same. he falls silent once again, any surprise from your unexpected arrival which urged him to talk normally wore off and the tension was back.

jungkook complies and sits down in front of you. he takes a good few seconds to stare at your outstretched palms before sighing in defeat and offering you his hands when he notices your enraged glare. He doesn’t want to be on the receiving end of your rage. and doesn’t matter he says, he would be lying if he said his hands didn’t throb from the pain.

you carefully remove the white gauges from his hands, wincing when more blood oozes out. looking at red cuts and bruises across his skin almost physically pains you, but jungkook stays completely silent, eyes drinking you in. he recalls being mad at you but he can’t quite recall the reason. it’s not because he can't remember now, especially with you here, tending to his wounds in such a delicate manner that you fear you would hurt him. as if something as gentle as your touch could ever cause him harm. not because you look like you were put on this earth to solely heal his hands. and not because you showed up here unannounced. because he genuinely can’t remember what made him so mad at you last night, literally out of thin air, and now he feels embarrassed at his own immaturity.

he just couldn’t figure out how to approach you after being a total jerk.

weird how humans tend to hurt the ones they love the most, almost always for no particular reason at all.

you finish your work wordlessly, putting band-aids around his knuckles and ointment on the cuts peppering his fingers. letting his hands fall onto his lap, you gather the bloodied materials from the floor and rise up to throw them in the waste paper box. jungkook follows your suit, standing up cluelessly.

“you’re gonna start throwing punches again?”

“hmm? uh no— I think I will practice the choreographies now”

“okay”, you sigh.

jungkook looks like hell, you realize. his messy hair is messier than usual, sticking out wildly at all angles, eyes droopy and rimmed with circles darker than you remember seeing last night. sweat glistened on his hunched figure tired from the physical exertion, soaking his sweatshirt.

you know you look just as worn out as him. you can feel it by the way he looks at you.

“uh so— are you gonna drive ho—”

“come with me.”

jungkook’s eyes widen as you wrap your arms around his torso, hiding your head on his chest. while a sweaty jungkook usually makes you giggle out a gross and maneuver far away, you hug him with gentle ardor, more so than usual.

you just want him to come home tonight.

“ash, sweetheart, i’m sweating”, jungkook tries to pry himself away from you but you just hold him tighter.

“don’t care. please come home.”

jungkook goes limp in your clutch for a few seconds before he’s softly hugging you back. of course, he would go home if you wanted him to, you didn’t need to ask him twice. who the heck is he to deny you? always a prisoner to your wishes, always prisoner to your love, and gladly so. how could he not? he rests his chin on your head and sways your body from side to side in a rhythm.

“okay”

“really?”

“really.”

the drive back home was short.

you drove, as jungkook was all out of it. he didn’t have the physical and mental coordination to walk down the building to the car, how the boy was gonna rehearse overnight, you had no idea.

“whoops, babe how were you gonna dance?” you supported his weight leaning down on you while you were walking, steading yourself before both of you fell on the ground, one arm wrapped around his torso, his figure hunched and head resting on your neck.

“I can walk. I am just choosing not to since you’re here”, he flashed you a grin with his eyes closed.

after arriving home, jungkook went straight to the shower and for a few seconds, you contemplated joining him. however, recalling how jungkook’s grumbling tummy throughout the whole ride, made you change your decision. he mentioned that he didn’t eat anything fulfilling all day. that is why you told him to freshen up and made a beeline towards the kitchen to make some instant ramen, not very healthy but quick and easy, and always gratifying.

so here you are now, serving ramen into two bowls with the leftover kimchi you guys had in the fridge. sleepiness makes your eyelids droop and you feel like prying them open with scotch tapes.

like tom, you snort to yourself, from tom and jerry.

man, you loved that cartoon during your childhood.

after all these years, you still don’t know if you’re team tom or team jerry.

hearing a faint clicking sound, you turn around and see jungkook approaching you, shirtless and clad in sweatpants. the shower had done marvels because he looks as attractive as he always does, with the water dripping down his damp hair onto the well-defined muscles in his chest. feeling a blush creep in, you quickly avert your eyes.

both of you are tired enough without resorting to er— any other activities for the night.

“what are you doing in the kitchen?” jungkook stares at you with confused doe eyes.

“putting food on the table like the dutiful girlfriend I am.”

“pretty sure that’s wife material”, jungkook whispers as he works his way into your arms, tugging your waist flushed with his.

“kook, you need to dry your hair properly! you’ll catch a cold”, you scold him softly, feeling greasy when you see him so fresh and glowy. you card a hand through his locks, feeling it to be more sopping than it seemed. you break free from his grasp to grab a towel from the washroom, ignoring the loud protests.

“sit”, you command, gesturing for jungkook to sit on one of the stools lining the kitchen island. when he complies, you gently massage his head with the towel, squeezing every last drop of remaining water from his hair. jungkook prefers to air dry his hair when he is at home, allowing it to get some rest from all the heat and styling he has to do on a regular basis, but he also religiously manages to forget at least soaking the water out.

he grabs you closer by pulling your waist. you stand between his thighs and continue massaging his scalp while he muffles his face on your chest, desperately seeking your warmth and comfort. a smile stretches across your face watching jungkook moan in satisfaction.

“how are the hands?”

“mmm good. need to put more band-aids”, his voice comes out hoarse being squished in your chest, “you didn’t need to cook. I know you are tired.”

“but i’m hungry too”

“oh. let’s eat then! it smells so fucking good!”

and jungkook’s sudden burst of enthusiasm prompts a hearty laugh from you, endeared to your core, just as you always find yourself enamored by his every action.

“what. do you want. jeon jungkook.”

jungkook’s soft laughter echoes inside the room in response to the aggression in your tone. he pulls you closer to himself, wrapping an arm tightly around your torso once your back is secured against his chest. after finishing your meal, jungkook volunteered to clean the dishes while we waited for you to take a shower. now that both of you are clean and full, you find yourselves tangled together in bed once again; your usual routine, you trying to sleep and jungkook trying to keep you awake.

“I want you to eat well. I want you to sleep well. you. I want you. always you”, he presses his face in your hair, taking in the aroma of wood and wild berries.

“and I am sorry”, he adds quietly.

you stir when you hear his words, turning around in his hold to face him. you know what he is apologizing for.

“well, you should be.”

“I really am.”

“i'm kidding, kook. you don’t need to be sorry. you were tired and—”

“but see, that’s the thing! every time I tell you that i’m tired and just want to sleep, you make damn sure I get some actual rest but I—”, he gestures at himself, looking at you with utmost concentration, “start acting like a spoiled child when I don’t get absolutely one hundred percent of your attention.”

“can't really disagree with that.”

“hey!”

“your words, not mine!”, you let out a squeal as jungkook tries to tickle you, holding him tighter in an attempt to make him stop, “love, that’s a part of you. and I adore that. that you feel comfortable enough to get mad at me for nothing. I don’t want you all smiley and cheery, without the bad things. I love you. and I want you as... you.”

“however annoying you may be”, you add as an afterthought.

jungkook scrunches his nose, “I am pretty annoying from time to time, aren’t I?”

“oh boy, you have no idea.”

“wow. am I imagining things or does everyone feel like you’re in a mood to constantly attack me tonight?”, he hugs you tighter if possible, shrugging, “my fault for loving you so much, I guess.”

“well, I am very lovable.”

“...oh boy, you have no idea.”

[number1greedlingfan]

Headcanons that are meaningless to everyone but me (or extremely niche inside jokes formed by my friend group)

Hawkeye finds pleasantries, mostly "hello"s and "goodbye"s, pointless and kind of annoying. She'll sometimes engage in them in person but never over the phone. She often hangs up while the other person is mid "bye".

Havoc's "tried and true" opener on dates is that he prefers rainy weather because he, quote, "loves to curl up by the window with a good book and some tea". This is not only a bold-faced lie, but it hasn't helped him get past the first date so it's not any more effective than his other lines.

Fuery pulls more women than Havoc does (not that there was any competition lmao) but he is somehow unaware of this.

Mustang's singular hobby that he does purely for fun is building model ships. His only social interaction is with his coworkers because he does not have any other friends.

Ed thinks Winry is cooped up in her shop all day and all night but that's literally only when he shows up because he DOES IT UNANNOUNCED!! Winry has a thriving social life both in Resembool and Rush Valley. She knows every single person in Resembool and keeps tabs on the neighbors. She's invited to dinners and group outings all the time. People mourned when she moved to RV. Within a month of working at Garfiel's, she'd already met most of the people on the street and she remembers most of their names.

Because of her interests, it's often assumed that Winry is a "not like other girls" type but she is the exact opposite. If you say a single misogynistic thing about other girls' interests (like astrology or pop music) on a first date she is getting up and leaving.

Ling is hypermobile and can bend his hands like this️ ⬇️ as well as do things like back bends and pulling his shoulders out of their sockets. When he was younger he would go up to literally anyone (family members, visiting officials, perfect strangers) and ask if they wanted to see him pull his shoulder out and then not wait for an answer.

Ling's favorite fruit is mango. When he was seven he refused to eat anything but that and had so many that he threw up at a family function. (Mangos were ruined for him for two years.)

Lan Fan does not get sick often but when she does It's Bad and she's taken out for a week or more. When she was younger and delirious with fever, she started distressedly mumbling that she was turning into a cookie. Nothing would convince her otherwise (Fu tried everything). In the end, they had to get Ling to help and he calmed her down in seconds by saying "there are no crumbs so I think you're probably okay".

This is a small one: Lan Fan is on the ace spectrum.

When Mei cooks for other people she makes it as cute as humanly possible. Everything that can have a smiley face or heart on it will. Side note, Al and Mei are 100% a couple that cooks together.

Mei is a little bit fujopilled. You understand.

While he seems shady as hell, Greed's rap sheet is actually pathetically small. The worst crime he's ever committed is, of course, the single instance of kidnapping that we saw on screen.

Greed doesn't understand electricity. He thinks it's powered by electric eels ("eelectricity") and has numerous drawings in his diaries theorizing on the mechanics of these machines. Ex: A generator that has an eel tank with a water wheel inside of it. The drawing is accented with large arrows and question marks and "HOW DOES IT WORK"s. That being said! He's not stupid in all academics. Give this guy some numbers and put it in a financial context and he can calculate anything.

Greed likes the "finer things" but he also has bad taste and sometimes these clash horribly. Is the furniture in his home expensive? Yes. Does any of it match in any conceivable way? Fuck no. Also that nice walnut hutch that cost 1.5K is used solely to display his novelty bong collection.

Heinkel and Darius only became close and discovered the other was gay because of the Camping Trip. So,

[moutainrusing]

sweeten up

First and foremost: Sirius was never serious. That was the glaringly obvious fact about him, even if his name was Sirius, he never took anything seriously. Of course, he could say he did anyway, for example, if someone were to ask:

“Are you serious?!”

Sirius could easily reply, hand clutching his pearls as he gasped, “Of course I’m Sirius! Are you trying to question my identity?!”

Really, he was always Sirius, and he was never serious.

To him, it always seemed like Remus was the most serious of all. It kind of annoyed him. Sure, they were friends. Remus was more James’s and Peter’s friend. Sirius didn’t feel like he and Remus connected. Because, first and foremost, Remus was too serious.

So serious, as if being a werewolf was the end of his life and if anyone found out he’d die, as if it were a secret he’d take to his grave, an oath he’d clutch to his chest. Remus spent his whole life studying, because he took grades as a stamp of approval that sealed the envelope of his fate, whether he’d get a job or end up homeless on the streets, maybe dead. To Remus, his only two options were being serious, or being dead. No in between. Sirius didn’t like that. Remus wouldn’t die. There were sides to him that were alive, animated, enthusiastic. Thrill-seeking. Sirius had seen them, flickers in the shadows beneath Remus’s eyes, shuttered out behind meaningless smiles, dancing across Remus’s face before his gaze became devoid of anything but forced calmness, mechanical motion. Remus went through life like a chore.

If that was what life was to Remus, maybe he was better off dead.

Sirius shouldn’t say things like that aloud. But he could think them. If someone wasn’t living, why would they bother existing? Remus made no impact, he was too cautious. Sirius needed him to do something. Act like his breathing was a blessing. Know his breathing was a blessing. It was. Remus had the power to be alive, and he was letting it die. With every one of his forced smiles, every time he gave something less than his all because he was scared of being too wild. Remus was already dying.

- - -

Okay, so maybe Sirius had lied. Sometimes, he did take things too seriously. For example, when his parents sent a letter along the lines of:

“You’re a disgrace and a failure and we’d be better off if you were dead. But as you are still legally considered our son here are some chocolate frogs. We love you. Unwillingly. It’s an obligation. Try not to get disowned. You could be useful. Try to prove yourself. Maintain the image that the Blacks are a loving family. Because we are, Sirius. We are.”

Letters such as above had Sirius slumping in his bed, not bothered to commit the laborious tasks of basic hygiene. They sliced the grin off his face with a smooth blade, replaced it with a sewn-smile that felt brittle and breakable, fraying at the seams. Sirius felt serious, as if every moment of his life mattered but he had made it count for nothing, misused and abused his time until it was frowning in the lines of his face, all his mistakes indented into his skin.

The thing was, they tried to love him. They did not really love him. They were therefore also failures.

In the bed across from him, Remus was curled into a book, also avoiding the trivial antics of James and Peter. Right now, Sirius and Remus were just too serious for child’s play like that. Sirius felt old, weather worn and beaten, as if he’d been battered by harsh winds and sprayed with mud, flung into bed by a tornado, sinking into his mattress like quicksand.

Remus glanced up from his book, meeting Sirius’s eye. He smiled slightly, not enough. Restraining himself. Sirius wanted to see all those crooked teeth. Stretched across Remus’s face in an inane grin. Sirius would like that.

Clearing his throat slightly, Remus reached into his bedside drawer, pulled out his own chocolate frog. From his own stash. Remus wasn’t rich. He chucked it at Sirius, tongue curling around the words, “Sweeten up.”

Sirius caught it, cradled in his hands. For some reason, it felt precious. He didn’t want to admit that. He didn’t want to thank Remus.

He felt called out, the audacity of Remus telling Sirius to sweeten up. Sirius was already sweet. He turned away from Remus, chocolate frog still held like a sacred offering.

When Sirius ate it, because eventually he scraped a little across his tooth, frog clutched between his fingers, the chocolate tasted sweeter than the ones his parents gave him. He was pretty sure they cast spells over any type of luxurious treat in order to reduce the fat and sugar levels, to make sure Sirius remained healthy; sweets can’t be too sweet.

Sirius fell asleep, and the sweetness clung to his tongue. When he woke up again, his mouth felt parched, and he actually got out of bed in order to drink water and brush his teeth. This was why sweets were good. Sirius glanced at Remus quickly. That was the way he said thank you. Subtle glances, the question why?

Why would Remus? Remus in all his seriousness. Remus, who was poor, presumably disliked Sirius for being his antithesis, who wasn’t obligated to help Sirius, to be kind to him. So why would he chuck Sirius a chocolate frog and notice him? Sirius was making a big deal out of nothing. It was just a chocolate frog. Sirius had never said thank you. His parents gave him chocolate frogs. Remus made them better. Why did Remus make them better? Remus in all his seriousness. Remus with his chocolate stash, the one for cheering people up, because he was serious about caring for people. Like a Healer at St. Mungos. Remus would be great with patients. He’d take everything they say to heart, look at them like they mattered, act like what he was doing was simply basic decency, as if it wasn’t worth something more than plain normalcy. Remus would be great with people. If he let himself.

If Remus were to sweeten up, lighten up, buoyancy in the heaviness on his shoulders, then he’d be a world-changer. Sirius just needed to peel him open, like the wrapper of a chocolate frog. Release him from his werewolf packaging, the one which he’d manufactured around himself, complete with the DO NOT TOUCH label, DANGEROUS SUBSTANCE. Remus wasn’t dangerous. Remus took himself too seriously. Really, the label he needed was REMUS LUPIN, who he was. Who he was, which was something Sirius wanted to open up, because Remus’s label was lying, false advertising. Remus was more than a werewolf, and it took a little chocolate frog for Sirius to know that.

What would it take for Remus to know that?

Sirius spat out his toothpaste, wiped his mouth, and when he left the bathroom, he steered towards Remus’s bed instead.

“Lumos,” Sirius cast. “Lighten up, Remus.”

The light shone over Remus’s pages, darkened in the evening light. “Straining is bad for your eyes,” Sirius hummed.

Remus looked at him, eyes glowing, shining, fiery amber crystals hidden in the depths of a dark cave, which Sirius would open up, push the rocks apart, find Remus buried within the fissure, fish him out, hook and line, and carry him, until Remus was shining in the daylight, rivalling the sun.

“Thank you,” Remus replied carefully, looking at Sirius curiously.

Sirius didn’t like it. “C’mon,” he grabbed Remus’s hand. “Let’s find James and Peter.”

“I—”

Sirius squeezed the hand he was holding, as gently as he could, with all the sweetness he could muster, the way a heart would squeeze in the chest when it was overflowing with emotion until it hurt. That was the way Sirius squeezed Remus’s hand. “Sweeten up,” he repeated, pulling Remus out of the dorm.

[sh1-n0bu]

Omg hello fellow lumine main!

I don't know if you watched the recent Xiao teaser but i got inspired by it so if it's okay with you can you write an angsty scenario about this:

After fighting with the "evil" Xiao, Xiao feels extremely tired and after walking for a while he bumps into you in a deserted field he then confuses/ hallucinates as if you are his evil self so he starts choking you(?) tries to attack you(?) And no matter what you say your words doesn't reach his ears and he snaps out of it only when Zhongli calls his name when he happened to be passing by

Hope this is not too specific! Feel free to change any part that you don't like and it could end with whatever genre you want whether it's angst or angst with fluff!! Thank you and please ignore this if you don't feel like writing it<33

✿ 𝙠𝙖𝙧𝙢𝙖 ✿

characters: xiao x nb!reader

warnings: angst, slight spoilers to xiao’s backstory, hurt/no comfort, fighting, descriptions of blood and canon violence, confession, big ouchies, major character death

notes: just wanna add that the reader doesn’t have a vision! since you didn’t specify the reader’s gender, i went with the “you” pronouns thing. also hiii❗️fellow lumine main❗️(ps: i wanted it to be different but my mitski’s playlist hurt me)

karmic debt is something that all yakshas bear in their lifetime until their timely demise. it is a collection of their evil deeds, of slaying demons, of taking the life of a corrupted being. of tainting one’s hand with blood whether that blood was already tainted or not.

out of five yakshas that guarded liyue and kept the land of any evil, three had died. minds corrupted by their own karmic debts, hearts shattered by the ones they once used to call a family, bodies torn apart, leaving behind only ashes with nothing to bury and reminisce about in the future. while one had disappeared without a trace.

out of five, only one remains.

and that one would sooner or later fall into his own karmic debt as well. it was only a matter of time. however, there was a small glimmer of hope in the yaksha’s tainted heart. a small glimmer in the shape of you.

sweet, loving you in all your glory who first met the legend of a being when he protected you from a mitachurl. kind, gentle you who thanked him later at the wangshu inn with a plate of hand-made almond tofu with a small offering at the side. thoughtful you who kept appearing every once in a while at the balcony, talking out loud to him about your day, your latest travels and business trades, knowing full well he was listening.

passionate you who gleefully accepted him with open arms when he first decided to sit beside you to hear about your day. understanding you who kept your distance when he warned you of his karmic debt, respectful of his wishes.

and the idiotic clumsy you who would sometimes trip over on the way up the stairs. who would smile at him with the same smile, calling out his name with a scratched hand or forehead. who would brush it off as something small and mediocre.

but the yaksha hated that you would always say your injuries are mediocre and “nothing to worry about”.

of course he would worry. you were one of the few people in his life that he held dear in his heart. one of the few who accepted him, karmic debt, dirty hands, tainted heart and all. the only one… he ended up falling in love with.

“if one day, this karmic debt that binds my soul becomes too much and i no longer can tell the difference between friend or a foe, call upon mister zhongli or the traveler. they’ll get rid of me before i can harm anyone” was something that the lonely yaksha would remind you often.

“it’s fine. that won’t ever happen” you would console him, hands weaving a flower crown together from the qingxin flowers he picked up for you.

“because i’ll be there to knock some sense into you” was your sweet promise as you would place the flower crown atop his head with a smile.

he always found it meaningless that you would weave the flowers into something as useless as a flower crown. but he couldn’t bring himself to ever take it off or throw it away, even after the flowers have dried up and he would pick up the fallen petals, storing them in a glass. he loved how even in death, without nourishments, the petals would continue to keep their beauty.

perhaps that’s why he always brought you flower bouquets back. ones made from random flowers. sweet flowers, glaze lilies, qingxin, silk flowers — he always brings back a flower for you whenever you visit. and on certain days when he feels an odd emotion gripping his heart, unable to tear his gaze away from you as you look at the setting sun, his gloved hand would slowly reach out, tucking one of the flowers behind your ear.

“pretty…” the lonely immortal would whisper without notice. only when you glance at him with a smile, would the yaksha realize what he had done, turn beet red and teleport away. too shy to confront his feelings, too conflicted to stay beside you, too afraid of your mortality.

there are so many times when xiao fears for your mortality.

the times when he feels his karma gripping his heart. hand clutching his jade spear tight to the point he fears he would break the weapon. blurry figures in his sight, muffled voices in his ears, an annoying high pitched ringing in his head.

it was just supposed to be another night. another night of keeping liyue safe. another night of banishing demons and abyss mages, mitachurls, what nots.

and yet it drained him so greatly. when was the last time he had ever felt this exhausted? down right almost collapsing right then and there in the fields of liyue? muscles straining, dragging his feet, vision blurry — the yaksha was exhausted.

amidst the chaos of the voices screeching in his head, demanding more blood, more death and sacrifices, xiao finds himself staring back at a familiar mask. his own mask. himself. or what kind of a twisted joke of himself it was.

their speed was evenly matched. spear swings and thrusts sharp, aimed at his weakest parts, the same feeling of adrenaline pumping as he fights against his own self. with some sort of blind luck or fate, the yaksha manages to make his other self kneel. a single plummet of his jade spear to the heart was all it took for the illusion to disappear.

this was a tiring night. xiao just wanted to go back to wangshu inn and collapse in your arms. you always had a soothing presence that quelled the karma in him.

“xiao?” a voice sounds from behind him. turning back to look at the person who spoke the immortal’s name, he finds himself growing enraged. another look alike of himself.

this was getting tiring.

and yet when the yaksha slipped on his mask and attacked, something was weird. this illusion was slower, weaker, never attacking back and he would almost daresay, felt wrong to fight against.

it didn’t took long for the seasoned fighter to leave a nasty cut on the illusion’s side, almost plunging his spear through their ribcage. he’d just have to try a bit harder then.

xiao wanted nothing more than to go back to you. to feel your arms around him. to feel your hands run through his hair, rambling on about your day or just simply choosing to stay quiet. either way, the lonely immortal loved it. he wanted to go back to you. to your loving embrace. sweet smiles. little nods when he whispered about somethings he wanted.

xiao just wanted to be with you.

just your presence alone was enough for him. he would savor the warmth your skin excludes as he sits beside you on the balcony. cherish every little moment you would spend with him. treasure the small gifts and the almond tofu you would make for him.

and yet why was it that such a familiar hand was touching his own gloved one when he finally drove his jade spear through the illusion’s chest.

it was only then the illuminated bird noticed.

there was no second ‘illusion’. there was no need to fight against the voice that called out to him. for it was you. for it was the one person he cherished the most. for it was his beloved that was now bleeding out, blood tainting the tips of his spear, warm hand covering his own gloved one. warmth that was so quickly fading away.

his beloved… that he killed.

taking his spear out, xiao moved quickly to catch your falling body. the warmth that your hug gives him, the comfort he feels now being replaced by the warmth of your blood.

“no. no no no no, h-hang on. i’ll get you to liyue harbor” what was he saying? it was no use. he had already pierced your heart straight through, there was no hope for you. but xiao wanted there to be one. xiao wanted you to stay alive so he can confess to you. xiao wanted you to live, wanted to taste your hand made almond tofu again, wanted to put flowers in your hair.

xiao wanted to spend his tomorrows with you.

“don’t. we both know i won’t make it” your voice calls out. weak, hoarse, tired. you were bleeding. eyes dull, losing life, losing it’s shine. you were dying and it was all his fault.

“please… please don’t go” the yaksha didn’t knew he was crying until his tears landed on your face. even when bleeding out, even when dying, you still smiled. and by the archons, you were still beautiful even as you lay dying in his arms.

“please don’t go. i love you too much to let you go…” the yaksha sniffled, sobs coming out as he holds you in his arms.

it was just like how you two would lay on the rooftops of wangshu inn. watching the stars, the cloud move by, pointing out the shapes as you two enjoy each other’s presence.

except the warmth that came from your body was now the warmth of your blood gushing out, staining his clothes. the smile you used to give him now dead, stoic, almost like a puppet’s forced smile. the bright shine of life that was once in your perfect [color], dull like a matted blood.

“i wanted to spend my tomorrows with you…”

[bigothteddies]

and if you’re sitting there reading that and asking yourself “what can I do to make doms more comfortable and safe?” all I am asking, begging really, is for you to be fucking normal and stop letting your biases guide everything you do and fucking say. You can reblog all the support and awareness and education posts you want but if you are not modifying your behavior and correcting your own assumptions constantly then all your talk is meaningless. Stop assigning morality to specific demographics (yes, even that one). Stop making assumptions that every dom is horny and wants to play with you. Stop making assumptions that a dom flirting with you wants to play with you. Stop using titles for doms without asking them how they feel about it first. Stop assuming doms are always in the mood and using them as a quick stop to get off with. Act normal about being fucking rejected. You want people to feel safe telling you no? Then you have to be a grown up about being told no. And that means not crying about it, not throwing a fit about it, not gossiping about it, not vague posting to tumblr about it, not ending friendships over it, not trying to convince someone to change their mind over it? Like do you guys even hear yourselves sometimes? It’s scary how normalized it is to have almost no empathy for other groups if it’s a group like doms. Look at your internal biases. And I mean LOOK at them. When you post about doms who do you mean? When you make general assumptions about doms who are you thinking of? Is it truly a dom you’re thinking of or is it another group of people that you’re picturing that you associate with being doms? We notice. Ask yourself, are you just reinterpreting traditional gender roles to fit dom/sub social dynamics OUTSIDE of play and are too scared to examine that and why it’s happening??? I’m not saying you’re a bad person for wanting to be a stay at home free use fuck toy for your monog partner, I’m asking if you’re reinterpreting the hidden rules of social interactions for different genders and just saying that it’s a dom/sub thing. Communication and responsibility are fucking important in kink. And if you’re doing all this because you don’t want any responsibility for your actions at ALL and are instead attempting to place responsibility on doms for every single action in your relationship, SPECIFICALLY relating to your own agency in the relationship, YOU are a problem. I don’t care if you want to be a puppy doggy and want zero responsibilities in life and want your partner to control you. What I’m saying is YOU have to be responsible enough to say I WANT THIS and I DON’T WANT THIS and LET’S TRY THIS and I DIDN’T LIKE THIS. And even that’s not enough. Also try DO YOU WANT THIS and DID YOU ENJOY THIS and WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY THIS and IS THIS OKAY. Are you a safe person to interact with??? When you sexually engage a dom are you thinking about them??? Are you mindful of their comfort and their enjoyment??? Or do you just see them as an animate toy where their perverted nature is inherently innate and happens to be getting you off right now but will be the exact reason you cancel them three months from now when they say the wrong thing and you take it to the internet before you even try opening a line of communication and working together to figure out what happened and what they meant. If you want doms to be safe and feel safe you have to actually view them as people. And I don’t think a lot of people do that.

[thestarfishinjootsoffice]

Hii, I have a lil request for slasher & child!reader. It’s a little bit personal, sorry haha.

Do you think you could write something with a child reader who has anemia? It’s sometimes literally just called “lack of blood,” so you can get an idea of how crappy it is to have.

It makes it really hard to breathe and makes my heart beat abnormally faster compared to people who don’t have it, and lots of chest pain. It also causes extreme cases of fatigue and headaches, and I have fainted because of it before.

I feel like having anemia would be a big struggle for slashers, (what with having to constantly run, lift thing, being real active) so they’d def feel upset that their kid has it.

There’s a lot more stuff, but you get the idea. Sorry if this one’s a bit more personal

No, no. It's perfectly fine. I hope you're doing well, I'm sorry if I made the condition sound worse than it is. Apologies for my ignorance.

And take care of yourself, anon. 🏹❤‍🔥

Cw:

Relation: platonic.

Slashers in this: Michael, Jason, thomas, bubba (sorry I couldn't write for billy & stu and sinclair twins)

Slashers x anemic! child! reader

Michael

It didn't bother him that much, but it did worry him. He didn't particularly have to worry about running... Well you running because he'd prefer you stay at your parents' house when he does murder but if you don't have any.... Well, he would rather carry you to safety if you're having trouble anyways. He'll survive. With Michael, there's always a home but never a home to stay at though.

he doesn't like standing and observing you whenever he notices you're having trouble breathing and when you clutch your chest in pain. He doesn't know what to do and he wishes he does.

Do you need.. What were those things again? Inhalers? He witnessed a few people use it when their breathing was erratic and rough so he wonders if you need it too. But for now he'll rub your back and hope it helps to support you emotionally that you're not alone and he's here. Whatever you need him to get, tell him and he'll try his best. Supplements? Give him an hour. I think he knows a pharmacy somewhere that he can break into. And don't even try to refuse them, he won't have it.

Since you're a child he worries this might be too hard for you – and he hopes it won't be the end of the world for your life anytime soon.

You're tired? That's fine, sleep on the couch or floor. Anywhere, he doesn't care. Just not on him. (You can convince him if you try hard enough.) He doesn't care if you nap 3 times a day, sleeping is good for you and helps you grow. Or so he heard. He doesn't even sleep that much anyways – your deadly father figure Michael approves. What he doesn't approve of are the headaches you get, the more painful they seem the more frustrated he gets. God dammit, why is your life so difficult? Where are the painkillers again?

Okay so the real panic sets in the first time you passed out in front of him. Fuck, did you die?

He's shaking your body slightly and pressing his ear up your chest, letting out a silent sigh when he hears your faint heartbeat. He gently lifts your body and places it on the couch – he sits beside you, watching you over like a hawk. Michael can't believe it. Never in his life had he thought he'd look after and stress for someone this hard - especially not a child. You must be absolutely insane if you think he's the type to care for one and yet here he is, listening carefully for your breath to hitch and your eyelids to be open.

He sighs, why can't he just murder peacefully? He's questioning everything. But he'll get used to it eventually. Sometimes he acts like you're a burden on his shoulders and a source of meaningless grey hairs but that's not exactly how he feels. It's.. Different.

But never hesitate to trouble him, not even when he comes back after 2 all nighters.

Jason

He is always so scared that one day your body might give up and die. The thing he stresses really hard about is that he can't give you the supplements and things you need. He's in the middle of buttfuck nowhere in the woods but he does know where the end of the woods are and he's kind of willing to step into civilization if it gets really bad, he really doesn't want to see his kid in pain and do nothing about it. He's not going to Manhattan again though. Always extra painstaking when he takes care of you and makes sure you don't need to use your body as much.

Anytime someone enters the camp he's immediately shoving you somewhere safe and deals with whoever trespassed himself. Although he's in immense discomfort when you have your headaches and difficulty in breathing. He's begging for his mom for help in his mind what he can do to ease whatever pain you're growing through.

Although Jason doesn't need to eat, he knows you do. So he searches for fish in nearby lakes (if there are even any) and he gets nuts, whatever is rich in iron. He'll get em for you.

Secretly hopes that people do trespass into camp crystal Lake. Those who happen to carry iron vitamins and supplements that is. He feels extremely relieved after going through the bags of one of the victims he's beheaded and finding a bottle, happily handing it to you and if you don't want to consume it he's very gently shoving it down your throat. Nope, you're going to eat this and that's final. Mama pam says so.

Sighs and lays you down when your chest starts hurting and stays by your side. Why do you have to go through so much? He thinks as he rubs your hair and waits for it to go away so you both can carry on whatever you were doing. Because of this, he doesn't allow you to lift the wood that he's chopped. If you insist it's either he stays stubborn or he allows you to carry the thin ones one at a time. You don't have to help him, and while he appreciates the thought. He would rather you stay inside and be safe.

Unfortunately for him, he doesn't catch on that this act of overprotectiveness and treating you as if you were made of bubble might upset you. Tilting his head to the side slightly as he watches you sulk in the corner in both frustration and feeling of being heavily underestimated. He really doesn't mean any harm. A little confused but Jason's got the spirit.

Panicks really hard every time you faint, his mind always wanders to the worst possible case scenario and assumes you have died. Incredibly frustrated since he's technically dead and a lot of his senses don't work properly. He's losing his touch and things are getting a bit hard to hear. Ear pressed hard against your chest, hoping his eardrums will be met with the thrum of your heartbeat and his fingers checking for your pulse, waiting to feel the throb upon his skin.

Got used to you getting fatigued and actually encourages you to sleep. It's better than following him outside of the cabins and into the woods where you risk getting bear trapped. Strict, very strict.

Thomas

Thomas is already very grateful for his family but he's even more grateful for them right now cause he would have no idea what to do without them. It depends, whether you're blood related or illegally adopted he will get used to it eventually. This ain't the craziest the family has dealt with.

He brushes you off whenever you try to help him carry things, what if you get dizzy and get headaches again? No! He won't have it. He carries you in his arms and sits you down somewhere. You can sit on top of his shoulders if you'd like.

Gets especially anxious when there are people comin in. He knows you won't particularly be targeted nor would the family allow you to exert yourself, but if something goes wrong? You have to run, and then your breathing will get roughed and- he doesn't want to think about it. But it does stay on his mind a lot. He makes sure to reassure you however he can when Hoyt makes you feel like you're a hindrance to the family, he doesn't know what he's talking about, is what Thomas tries his best to tell you. 'He's just scared.' He thinks and pats your head.

Heard from mama mae that meat, dark green vegetables and nuts will help raise your iron. (Assuming that he has been somewhat educated on your condition.) And then from now he will pester you to consume those. You don't wanna eat the meat? Why not? But fine, eat your veggies and nuts then.

Iron supplements? What are those?

Your chances of getting them are pretty low, I'm not sure if there's a pharmacy or clinic nearby but fingers crossed Hoyt might get in that damn truck and drive to get them for you if he feels nice enough. Tommy's not allowed out into the public.

Frowns a little when he cuddles you in his lap for you to fall asleep and feels your hands are cold. Why are they so cold?, hell why are you so cold? It's not even winter yet. Oh but when winter does come he's smothering your body with lots of layers. Will add more layers if you fall sick. And no, that's not up for debate.

When you faint he'll first stare at your unconscious body in shock before picking you up and putting you down on the couch, he puts his hand in front of your nostrils and feels air hitting his fingers. With a relieved sigh he patiently waits for you to wake up. Not too alarmed.

It's a different story when you're in pain, his heart breaks a little when your chest hurts and your head aches. You want water? Give him a break, he's trying his best.

Bubba

Out of this list, he's the one to handle this the worst when one of your more serious side effects takes place. And it really doesn't help that his family kinda don't know what to do either. They can try to help but it probably won't work that much.

It's lowkey over for you.

It also depends. All he knows is that something is wrong with you; you get dizzy, your breathing gets all incorrect, your chest hurts and you (guessing because of the rougher environment) faint a few times too much to what he'd prefer. Absolutely clueless.

Although you do have more of a leverage if you have at least somewhat knowledge about your condition. (Reading books or you were adopted and knew it beforehand way back prior to when bubba killed your parents.) This way Bubba can learn and know what to expect, he's very much happy to learn about you and take care of you to the best of his abilities.

Quite sad actually that you can't properly take part in revving the chainsaw and chainsawing people. Though the times that you can are when the victim is tied down and helpless. It's up to you whether or not you want to partake in it, though you don't have much of a choice. The family's set on tradition and won't understand why if you don't want to; 'you WILL be killing people with this chainsaw! I'm sick of this phase of yours!' 'It's not a phase.'

Seeing you faint will almost send Bubba to tears, hell, maybe it did already. He's just shaking your body while whining and babbling incoherently. After the whole incident he'll rarely ever let you out of his sight, great, now he's dragging you everywhere.

There will be a lot of problems being in the Sawyer family. But at least you're still alive... Right?

[jaylaxies]

A REUNION TO REMEMBER

PAIRING: sunghoon x fem!reader

GENRE/CW: smut, unprotected sex, fingering, cunnilingus public sex, car sex, mentions of drinking, mentions of jay and yunjin (le sserafim), and other idols.

WC: 11,380 words

SYNOPSIS: you last met park sunghoon when you were in high school, more precisely, when he had gained enough courage to ask you out, not knowing that the most popular girl of the school was already taken by the senior who was equally as popular. four years later, your batch decided to hold a reunion back in your town, where you meet sunghoon again. only, the problem is that he’s hotter than ever and you can’t, for the life of you, keep your eyes off him.

WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni

A/N: hihi, angels! happy hoon day! and this one is for my beloved @end-hyphen happy belated birthday iloveyou <33 i really hope that you like it! im sorry for taking so long to complete this fic but here we are :3 all likes, comments, reblogs and feedbacks are highly appreciated! it keeps me motivated! iloveyou all <3

“There’s no way he didn’t know!” You exclaimed, recalling how things went down back in tenth grade.

Yunjin only sighed on the other end of the call, “listen, I love you but, you have to take into account how oblivious the poor boy was back then! He studied and skated, that’s all he did,” she spoke, emphasizing on the but part.

You huffed, sitting down on the edge of your bed, nodding to yourself as you found her point to be a valid one.

“It’s still awkward though,” you mumbled, playing with a loose thread of your sweater.

“It’ll be fine, okay? It’s been four years, and it’s not like you have to talk to him.” Her words were true yet again, and this is why you loved her.

Yunjin had been your best friend since you were in middle school, she’d always been honest and the social butterfly everyone loved, but at the same time, she was humble and kind, always taking care of the ones around her.

You were relieved to know that she would be with you for the school reunion, an event which was planned thoroughly. It wasn’t just a meet up, it was a three day trip back to your hometown, the first day being the reunion dinner night, the second being the beach day and the last being the night out at the new club.

The idea itself was thrilling, not to mention how desperately you needed this break, Yunjin even quicker to express her excitement by booking two hotel rooms for you both as your parents now lived in Seoul, and not in your hometown.

Another sigh left your mouth as you plop down on your bed, staring at the ceiling while wondering why you even bothered to check the guest list, to check whether Park Sunghoon was invited or not.

It was no surprise when you saw his name in the list, gulping as you recalled the embarrassing incident which took place between you both, the one in which you never got the opportunity to confront him.

You closed your eyes, revisiting the memory.

It was the last day of the tenth grade, your exams had just gotten over and the student crowd was elated, throwing notes everywhere to celebrate the same, which caused you to scrunch your nose at the sight of paper wastage and meaningless litter.

“Hey,” a sweet voice called your name at the exact second, succeeding in grabbing your attention.

You recognized him as your classmate, Sunghoon, who was also a good friend of your own friend, Jay.

“Hey! Hoon, right?” You smiled at him, a slight red colour spread on his cheeks at the sight of you.

He nodded, also saying hello to Yunjin, who was right next to you before his gaze fell to his fingers as he fiddled with them, mustering courage to look into your eyes, your own ones staring at him with curiosity.

“I just, I wanted to ask if you’d like to, you know, go out with me sometime?” He let out the question, unsure of what words he had used and cringing at how shaky his tone was.

Your eyes widened as you looked at Yunjin with pleading eyes, asking for help. It was no secret that you were one of the popular girls at your school; sweet, hardworking and humble.

Getting a confession such as this one was nothing new to you, declining politely always worked, however, that was when you were single and not in a relationship with the most popular guy in the school, who was also your senior. It was almost cliché with how the ace, Lee Heeseung, had ended up falling for you.

The news was quick to spread, fast enough for your group chat to go crazy, asking you questions which almost made you throw your phone away with embarrassment. In the span of three days, the whole school was aware of the new it couple. Except for Sunghoon, that is.

“As friends?” You winced at how pathetic your question was, which certainly made things ten times more awkward.

“N—no, as something more?” Sunghoon helpfully explained, looking everywhere but at your face now.

“Sunghoon,” Yunjin spoke up, causing you to release your breath, thankful that she was here to control the situation when you could say nothing and feel uncomfortable looking at his disappointed face.

“She’s taken, love! Sorry,” she informed him, his eyes widening and mouth agape.

You wondered if he was genuinely clueless about this, he did look lost to you.

You gasped, suddenly feeling an arm wrap around your waist, pulling you closer as you stared at Heeseung in surprise, who was already looking down at you with a smirk.

“Hey, baby. I missed you,” he spoke up, kissing you right on the mouth.

Sunghoon witnessed the whole scene, a frown settling on his face, embarrassment clear as he softly said, “e—excuse me,” leaving as soon the words left his mouth, shoulders slumped

You never met him again, only seeing him with Jay at times. He was quick to change his school soon after it, knowing that he’d be able to do so easily since the finals were over.

And you were going to meet him now.

Your eyes snapped open at the thought of that, you just wished for the trip to be a pleasant one. Furthermore, from your side, you’d make sure to not be awkward around him, pretending as if the whole situation didn’t happen in the first place

If you’d even get to talk to him, that is.

“Wow, you really are dumb,” Jake laughed uncontrollably once Jay finished telling him the story of none other than Park Sunghoon.

“Shut up,” Hoon mumbled, annoyed that the topic which he had wanted so desperately to be buried forever was brought up once again.

“Wait, but if you knew about them dating then why didn’t you tell Hoon?” Jake pointed reh question towards Jay.

“Because he never told me he was going to confess in the first place!” Jay’s eyes widened almost comically as he exclaimed, “and it was exam time, Sunghoon had sworn he wouldn’t use his phone till the exams ended, and you probably don’t have any clue as to how big of a nerd he was—”

“Jay! Stop this,” Hoon whined, covering his face with his palm as Jay took out his phone, scrolling to find a picture of Sunghoon.

He looked a lot smaller than he is now, wearing a yellow, collared t-shirt and round specs, lips curved into a small smile as he looked into the camera.

“Holy fuck! You could have been easily casted for the live action of Doraemon, as Nobita of course.” Jake high-fived Jay after taking a look at the picture, the latter almost falling down with the laugh he had let out.

“Nobita? Oh god, can you guys shut up now? I don’t even want to go and face her ever again,” he snapped, whining right after.

He had been overthinking about everything that could happen once you meet him again. Would you laugh in his face and remind him of it? Heck, would you even remember him? It mattered to him a lot more than he’d like to admit.

A four year gap should have been enough to let his embarrassment fade away, however, all his efforts went to vain once he got invited to the reunion.

“Listen, it’ll be okay. She probably doesn’t even remember you!” Jay tried to make him feel better.

“That’s very consoling, thank you very much,” Hoon rolled his eyes, wondering if you’d forgotten him already. It wasn’t as if you both had been close, but you did see each around and during the classes. He won’t lie, the thought made him sad.

“You definitely have a chance now though, if that makes you feel better,” Jake let out slowly, noticing the glow up Sunghoon had after comparing him with his old picture.

“Shut up, I don’t like her anymore,” he mumbled, a light blush creeping up his neck as he did so.

Jake and Jay exchanged a look, putting on a smile as they dragged Sunghoon for shopping while Jay went on talking about what all they should be packing for the three day trip, bringing a genuine smile to Hoon’a face as he looked at his goofy best friends.

Maybe the trip wouldn’t be so bad, he thought.

“Ay babe! You look hot,” Yunjin winked at you, eyeing you up and down while you glided your lipstick along the expanse of your lips, smacking them together to spread it evenly.

You winked back, “you look hotter.” She laughed just as you said that, engulfing you in a hug.

“Ready to leave?” She asked, getting her luggage out as you followed with a nod, smiling while you got into the cab, Yunjin being quick to snap a few selfies to mark the start of your trip.

The entire time on your way to your destination, you felt giddy, wondering how everyone looked now. It had been a while since you had met them and you secretly hoped that you’d get a chance to get laid, the studies kept you busy and you hadn’t got time to tend to your needs.

Your mind was full of scenarios as you imagined how your stay would go, what all activities you’d do and so on, falling asleep on the plane while envisioning the same.

“Wake up, sleepy head,” Yunjin shook your arm slightly, waking you up from your dreamland.

It took you a second to realize that the plane was going to land, followed by the announcement of the same and you were still sleepy when you put on your belt.

The journey was short, and you were checked into your hotel room in no time. As soon as you jumped on the bed, Yunjin came into your room holding a bunch of skincare products and sheet masks.

“Get up! We need that glow for tonight,” she demanded, plopping on the bed with you as she ushered you to go and wash your face.

Skincare was therapeutic for you, however, it also made you sleepy, even more so when the hotel beds were the definition of comfort and pleasure.

Your skin was glowing by the time you woke up, also checking the time so see that you had to start getting ready for the reunion dinner at once for you to reach there in time.

“No! You’re not wearing that,” Yunjin pointed at your trouser outfit.

“Why not?” You asked, looking at it. It did seem like a decent outfit to you.

“Because we have to show everyone that you’re still the it girl you were four years back, now hotter than ever,” she mumbled, looking into your luggage as you let her take the matter into her hands, your focus now on styling your hair.

“This!” She exclaimed, getting a dress out which made your eyes sparkle. It was a new dress which you hadn’t gotten a chance to wear before, and she was right, it’s the perfect opportunity for you all to dress up a little.

“Ready?” She smiled. She looked stunning in that black dress of hers, her freshly coloured hair only added to her beauty.

“Ready,” you confirmed.

“Y/n!” You heard your name, and suddenly you felt warm hands around your body, pulling you into a friendly hug.

Sweet voice and strawberry scent was enough for you to know it was Isa. A big smile spread on your face as you hugged her tighter, looking around to see all of your classmates hugging and talking to each other.

“You look so pretty!” You were in awe, seeing her gummy smile and the pink dress she sported.

“And you? You’re glowing! I bet you grow prettier each day,” she giggled, making your heart melt. She had always been kind and bubbly, another one of the reasons why you were so close to her.

You looked around the restaurant, it was new and the interior was modern, booked for the night for your batchmates. Meeting everyone was like a breath of fresh air.

You didn’t even manage to say hello to everyone before they announced the start of the dinner, asking everyone to take seats, however, Jay was quick to reach to you, his smile as sharp as you remembered it to be.

“As stunning as ever,” he complimented you, hugging your side.

He was in a black suit, hair styled accordingly and it was evident that was wearing an expensive scent. You can’t deny, he looked handsome.

“Thank you,” you said softly, “you look chic as always too.”

A shy smile graced his face, “come on, let’s go and sit,” he said.

You nodded, following him as you noticed that almost everyone had taken seats, Yunjin waving at you, pointing at the seat she saved, which you gladly took, fixing your dress while you did so.

What you failed to notice was the person next to you, who had visibly stiffened with your sudden appearance, until you turned your head to look at him.

Your breath hitched, and you prayed that it wasn’t visible how your eyes widened by just a fraction at the sight of Park Sunghoon.

Glow up would be an understatement, he looked like a completely different person without his specs and baby fat.

His eyes were a chestnut brown colour, it was the first time you had looked into them so clearly, face sculpted with a sharp jawline and pointed nose, lips naturally shaded into a glossy red shade and hair parted to the side, styled accordingly to match his black button up.

“Hey,” a deep voice snapped you out of your observation session and you realized that it was him.

“Sunghoon, hey. It’s been a while,” you smiled at him softly, hoping that he didn’t notice you staring at him just a second back.

Meanwhile the boy was surprised to know that you indeed remembered him, his heart beating a little faster now that he was in such a close proximity with you.

“You look beautiful,” he spoke mindlessly, mouth opening again as he realized what he had said out loud, “how have you been?” He quickly asked, mentally slapping himself for being such a mess.

That only made you smile further, “thank you, Hoon. You look really handsome too.” You let out, and you did mean it.

Your words made him smile, which displayed his fangs. Everything about him intrigued you all of a sudden, his presence affecting you in a way you didn’t think it would.

Before you could talk more, the waiters came out, bringing the starters as everyone chatted excitedly at your table, Yunjin pulling you to her side, whispering in your ear.

“Is that him? Y/n, you couldn’t say yes then but it’s not too late, do it now!” She rushed to speak into your ear, making sure no one else heard it but you.

“Yunjin shut up, I just met him,” you spoke with wide eyes.

“So? You have three days to be with him! And to be honest, he looks like he knows how to fuck—” you covered her mouth, not letting her finish the sentence.

“Oh lord! I’m not going to do that!” You exclaimed, taking a bite of your soup, mood uplifting at the scrumptious taste.

“But why?” She was almost going to whine before Sunghoon called out your name, saving you from this conversation.

“Yes?” You asked too quickly.

He chuckled softly and you swore your name sounded better when it came out of his mouth. Maybe you were too into studying all this while that even the littlest things made you jumpy.

Or maybe it was the man who sat next to you.

“Could you pass me that napkin, please?” He asked politely.

His slender fingers brushed against yours as he took the napkin from you, saying thank you to you, the slight touch of his cold hands made you shiver.

Yeonjun, who sat right in front of you, was successful in distracting you, asking about your life in Seoul and about what you’ve been studying.

He was also a student like you, although he liked to work as a model in his free time, “it pays well and you get free clothes too!” He explained with a goofy smile.

You felt content, loving how friendly the atmosphere was as if you guys never lost touch in the first place, everyone drinking champagne to celebrate with a cheer that you join in too, maybe this is why people hype reunions.

Sunghoon was attentive to everything you had said till now, trying his best not to stare at you every few minutes. Your smile made his lips curve into one as well, unconsciously at that.

The dinner concluded soon, everyone getting up and gathering for a round of group pictures.

Sunghoon’s hand brushed against yours in the process, succeeding in giving you goosebumps again, which he didn’t fail to observe.

“Are you cold?” He asked, noticing your goosebumps.

You didn’t have any better explanation, and you couldn’t possibly tell him that he was one responsible for it.

“Yes, a bit,” you answered, looking at the height difference between you both, his body looked buff, veins visible now that he had rolled his sleeves up.

“Here,” he offered his blazer to you, gently wrapping it around your frame as you could feel yourself being overdosed with his scent — it was attractive.

“I—thank you.” Your cheeks felt hot.

Sunghoon was clearly pleased to see you in his clothes, he had seen you after four years and yet, his opinion about you didn’t change, you looked perfect to him.

You both reached the group, you trying to tiptoe more as to ensure your visibility in the picture. It was hard to take a picture of such a big group, especially when people simply couldn’t stand straight out of excitement, posing with silly expressions.

“Y/n! Come here,” Yunjin called your name, pulling you close for another set of pictures with everyone.

“Listen guys! Tomorrow we’ll meet at the beach by twelve, make sure you reach there on time!” Hyunjin announced.

You loved beaches, the sunlight made the water shine like it hid the prettiest set of diamonds in there, the smell of land and water meeting was soothing to your senses, not to mention the smiling faces all around you. It all made beaches beautiful and you were excited about tomorrow already.

As you made your way out of the restaurant, you noticed two other people waiting for you along with your best friend, Jay and Sunghoon.

“You’re here! We’re taking a cab together to our hotel, apparently they’re staying over at the same place as ours,” she explained, “they probably have their rooms in front of ours too!” She joked.

Sunghoon looked at you in his blazer, deciding that he won’t even ask you to give it back to him, it suited you too much.

He wanted to spend more time with you, he wanted to sit next to you in the cab and he made sure to sit in between you and Jay, his side pressed against yours.

“Are you comfortable?” He asked softly.

“Oh, yeah. Are you?”

He nodded, loving the arrangement so far. Living in the same hotel meant that he’d get to see more of you.

“So, Y/n, how’s it going with uni? Do you have a boyfriend or someone special in your life?” Jay asked, knowing that his friend was dying to know the same.

“It’s hectic but somehow manageable, I like what I’m doing and I won’t be leaving without that degree so, yes I feel like the hard work would pay in the end,” you explained confidently, “and no, I do not have a boyfriend. It’s honestly hard to go on dates when you barely have time for yourself.”

You’d always been hard working and Sunghoon admired that about you, his focus was solely on you ever since you stepped inside the restaurant and talked to him. It wasn’t easy for Sunghoon to fall for someone, but once he saw you again, it was as if his feelings for you had never left.

Just then, the car swiftly came to a stop, jerking forward slightly as Sunghoon quickly put his arm around your waist, pulling your body into him, securing it.

Some car had jumped the red light, almost causing an accident, but thankfully you guys were all safe and without any scratch as the driver was quick to use the brakes.

“You okay?” He asked, whispering as he cupped your cheeks.

You nodded, unconsciously shifting closer to him and he didn’t make any efforts to move his hand away, letting it rest on your waist while your head rested against his shoulder.

It felt comfortable, his scent, his touch, but more than that, it felt genuine, which is why you closed your eyes, sleeping on his shoulder while his breathing hitched, looking at your sleeping figure.

So pretty, he thought, brushing a few strands of your hair away from your face, tucking them behind your ear, letting his fingers linger there for a while. It felt like a dream to Sunghoon, and he wished that he could get more of this — more of you.

The comfort and your warmth seemingly got to him as well, his head resting on yours as he drifted off to dreamland with a slight smile ghosting on his lips.

“Cute! Cute!”

“They look like a couple, woah.”

A series of flashes was quick to disturb your sleep, eyelids slowly opening to see two phones shoved near your face, clicking pictures of you, the chatter coming from the very same pair of people.

Just then, you realized that the picture in question was not just of you, but of the guy who so gladly let you sleep on his shoulder.

Your eyes widened when he blinked open his eyes too, Yunjin and Jay laughing at his reaction when he saw you staring at him, face inches away from yours.

His eyes widened comically before he diverted his attention to Jay, slapping his hand away who was busy shooting all of this on his phone, even the cab driver watched it with a fond smile on his face.

“You guys are adorable,” Yunjin squealed when you got out of the cab, rushing to get back to your room, cheeks heated and heart racing.

Were you embarrassed? Yes. But not even a single cell in your body can deny that it felt good — being close to someone.

“Stop pairing us as if we’re school kids!” You whispered into your best friend’s ear.

“It’s fun though.” She shrugged, joining you in the lift, “oh, and by the way, nice blazer you’ve got on,” she smiled, continuing to tease you.

Right, you had to return the blazer to Hoon.

Turns out, Yunjin was right and both of them were indeed on the same floor as you, your room right in front of Sunghoon’s room.

“Good night guys,” she sang, leaving for her room.

Jay followed suit, leaving for his own room, not forgetting to send a wink your way, which the other boy noticed with a frown on his face.

Your outstretched hand got his attention, his blazer now in your hand, “thank you so much, Hoon,” you spoke up.

His nickname comes out of your mouth seamlessly, making him smile.

“You can keep it with yourself,” he started, causing you to tilt your head in a questioning manner, “in case you feel cold again, y’know.”

“Yeah? What if I want you to be the one who keeps me warm if I feel cold tomorrow?” You looked into his eyes.

“I—Yes I can keep you warm, but we won’t be needing the blazer then,” he answered a second after overcoming the initial shock of you saying that.

“Perfect. Good night, Hoon,” you spoke sweetly.

However, he wrapped his fingers around your wrist the second you turned around, spinning you so you stood right in front of him, hands on his chest to support yourself as your eyes widened at his bold move.

“Good night, love,” he whispered, his finger tracing your jaw, before he leaned in to place a soft kiss on the apple of your cheek, a teasing smile on his face before he turned around, getting into his room.

Your fingers instantly touched the place where he had kissed you. The small display of affection earlier had left you restless and desperate for more, wondering how his lips would feel against the expanse of your skin.

You wanted more.

“Fuck! Faster, please,” you whined, his fingers pressed against your cunt, rubbing them in an agonizingly slow manner, his mouth planting kisses all down your valley of chest.

“You like that?” He asked against your skin, biting and sucking on your tits harshly, doing it enough to leave marks on your body.

The pain was more pleasurable than you could have ever thought of.

“So much,” you hummed, fingers grabbing onto his roots, tugging his hair.

You cried out of pleasure when he inserted two of his fingers into your pussy, thrusting them in and out before he came to whisper against your lips.

“Bet you dream of me too,” he smirked.

A moan left your mouth, which he silenced by kissing you right away, taking all your lewd noises in.

“Don’t you?” He asked again, his fingers leading you to your orgasm.

Until your alarm rang and your eyes snapped open, a gasp leaving your mouth once you came to the realization that it was just a dream.

A wet dream.

About Park Sunghoon.

“Oh god,” you groaned, hiding your face into the blanket, pussy tingling with the dream you had a few seconds back, mostly due to how realistic it was.

You had no other option but to hop into the shower and lean against the shower wall, touching yourself as your phone played a sensual song on Spotify, till you made a mess on your fingers, breathing hard while imagining how today would go.

Especially when you had a beach day ahead and the possibility of seeing Hoon shirtless would be high

Ignoring the fact that you had a wet dream about the man sitting in front of you during breakfast was a tough thing to do, yet you managed it well.

He looked like a prince even in casual clothes and he knew how to make you go crazy by just a wink of his, even giving you his doughnut which you wanted so dearly.

His appearance was innocent, unlike last night where he was in a black button up — hot and attractive beyond words, he left you speechless.

“Are we renting a bike or not?” You asked Yunjin with a smirk after you were done eating.

“I’m down,” she gave you a high-five, “I don’t know about the boys though.”

“Wait, you ride bikes?” Jay asked, impressed.

“Of course, we do!” You answered.

“Take us on rides then,” he said, brow raised at the offer.

“Sure, select your rider, we’ll go to the beach on the bike then,” you smiled.

By the time you got ready in shorts and a top, which you wore on your bikini set, the sun had come up and was shining brightly. You had your bag packed with all essentials and two sets of extra clothes because you never know when you’re at the beach, not to mention how much sunscreen you had used to protect your skin.

All four of you got into the lift, and you noticed how you and Yunjin were wearing the same colours, while the boys were in shorts and t-shirts.

“Who’s coming with me then?” She asked, showing her bike keys.

“I am,” Jay spoke up, as if it was their plan to leave you with Sunghoon, alone at that.

You turned to look at Hoon, “you’re stuck with me then.”

“Perfect,” he smirked, following you out.

“Wear this,” you passed him the helmet, which he put on.

But your gaze went on his arm, which flexed as he fixed his helmet, the short sleeved t-shirt did nothing to hide his muscles.

“Let’s go,” he smiled, snapping you out of your daydream.

“You ready?” A smirk settled on your face as you checked the rear view mirror, looking at Sunghoon, who was quick to send a nod back.

What he didn’t expect was that you’d speed up the second you start the bike, making him jerk forward and hold on to your waist, making you shiver slightly before you began your journey of a total of ten minutes, the beach being close to your hotel.

“Woah, fuck!” You heard the boy say from behind, making you smile as you zoomed past the cars and other vehicles.

“Hold on tight,” you screamed against the wind, loving the light breeze caressing your skin, and Sunghoon’s body pressed against yours.

His arms tightened around you with your command, and your mind wandered to the morning when you dreamt about him.

It did feel good, and you were certain you wanted more.

Meanwhile, Sunghoon was looking around, enjoying the scenery, but most importantly, he was enjoying the time he got to spend with you — his old crush. He leaned in, taking in your scent, smiling at how you didn’t change your perfume still.

He was highly attentive and observant when it came to you.

A series of hooting was heard in the parking lot, where all of your gang was waiting for you four to arrive, thoroughly surprised to see you riding bikes.

“That’s hot,” Yeonjun came over, wearing only beach shorts, abs on display as he saw you take off your helmet, the scene looked as if it came out of a movie.

“Dang, you’ve been working out?” you asked, focus now on him as you happily chatted and took his hand, which he offered with his charming smile, and walked towards the beach with everyone else.

Sunghoon watched it all with his jaw clenched, Jay and Yunjin approaching him with a knowing expression on their faces. He wanted to spend time with you, and he didn’t expect anyone to steal you away from him so soon.

“Maybe she’d notice you if you remove your SpongeBob t-shirt,” Jay adviced, keeping his elbow on his shoulder.

“What’s wrong with SpongeBob?” He asked, tilting his head.

“Oh, definitely, Jay's right. Do you have abs?” Yunjin asked, doing the same from his other side.

“I—why does it matter?” Hoon huffed, shrugging their hands off and walking further.

“It does matter when you’re whipped!” Jay announced helpfully, making Hoon stop to slap his shoulder.

“Stop shouting for fucks sake!” He warned.

“You’ll never get her at this rate. Trust me, go shirtless and see the magic. Also, stop being a loser and move your ass, go and approach her,” Jay said.

Sunghoon simply looked around to ensure that no one was eavesdropping on their conversation, his friend embarrassed him enough and your best friend didn’t help either. Did he actually make it that obvious? He wondered.

Seeing you laughing with Yeonjun did make him want to step up his game.

“Guys! Get changed and then the ones who wanna enjoy the water are free to do that, while those who wish to do water sports, gather around that area,” Taehyun announced, pointing at a shed area meant for the registration of water sports.

You simply wanted to enjoy in the water, so you made your way towards the changing stalls, getting rid of your shorts and top to reveal your bikini, after which, you looked into the mirror to ensure your appearance was okay.

“Love the bikini,” Isa complimented and you cooed at her one piece swimsuit. Everything she wore suited her perfectly.

And Isa didn’t lie, a lot of heads turned to look at you once you were out, some silently admiring your beauty, for instance — Sunghoon, with his mouth agape slightly.

While others, like Yeonjun, didn’t hesitate to show how pleased they were by your entrance, whistling slowly, which flustered you slightly as you rushed to get under the beach umbrella, eyes darting away to look at Sunghoon, who was already staring at you.

“See you in the water,” Yunjin left, running away with excitement clear on her face.

That left you two alone under the umbrella.

“You’re not going?” You asked Sunghoon, getting sunscreen out of your bag.

“Just waiting for you,” he spoke smoothly, causing you to look at him.

“Help me then?” You passed him the bottle of sunscreen, turning around with your lower lip bitten.

Sunghoon took a deep breath, he wanted to touch you in more ways than one. He squeezed out some sunscreen, his cold fingers touching your skin as he applied it on your shoulder with a gentle massage.

His strong hands made you sigh with pleasure, head tilting to give him more access to your neck area, his fingers paying attention to each inch of your back, fingers digging into your inner shoulder with his breath fanning your neck.

He took your name, almost as a whisper.

“Yes, Hoon?” You looked back at him, only to find his face inches away from you.

He came closer, looking into your eyes, “let’s go,” he smiled, heart racing from the proximity and he wasn’t sure how longer he could handle staying so close to you without even kissing you.

“Race you to the water,” you screamed, running away with a smile so big, it naturally made the boy smile as he realized how much he wanted you.

You were fast, but he was faster and his arms wrapped around your waist the second your feet touched the water. Soft giggles left your mouth as he turned you around and ran further, standing in the water with his arms open and a victorious smile graced his face.

“That’s cheating!” You pointed your finger at him, others laughing at your childish bickering as he defended himself with a serious expression, trying not to give in to your pout.

“I don’t cheat,” he came close to say, pouting on his own.

Before you could retort, he started splashing water all over your body, others joining soon and splashing water everywhere.

“Hoon!” You squealed, rushing to splash water back on him, only to trip and fall right into his arms, his hands firmly holding you close to him.

“Falling for me already?” He asked, a cocky smirk on his face.

“In your dreams,” you retorted.

“You were there,” he shrugged, confusing you yet again.

“Where?”

He hooked his finger and lifted your chin tenderly, making you look into his eyes, “in my dreams last night,” he winked, leaving you speechless.

Sunghoon was the shy, nerdy kid who used to sit in the front of the class, always keeping to himself, talking to only Jay.

Now, however, you couldn’t even recognize the guy in front of you. While you found the old Hoon to be cute, you wouldn’t lie when you say that the confidence he oozed now made you want to know him more. The words rolled off his tongue so smoothly, which made you wonder if he flirted with others too.

It seemed as if he was on a roll to make you go speechless, and his plan was working. By the time you turned around to reply to him, you saw him swiftly remove his t-shirt.

Your body stilled as your eyes traveled up and down his body, skin shining with the sunlight that complimented him perfectly. He was lean but muscular, muscles flexing as he took off his SpongeBob t-shirt, abs now on display for everyone to see. He looked flawless.

Yunjin elbowed your side, eliciting a yelp out of you, “what?” You whisper yelled.

“You’re drooling,” she giggled, “get that man,” she tapped on your shoulder, pushing you towards him.

However, when you observed some girl, who wasn’t a part of your group, coming close to Hoon while placing her hand on his bicep and asking if he was single, it made you want to run away and not witness the exchange of Sunghoon smirking at the other girl.

Naturally, you made your way out of the water, face hot as you fanned yourself walking towards the beach chairs under the umbrella, not knowing that the boy had no other job but to follow you, politely rejecting the other girl.

You sat down, closing your eyes as you tried your hardest not to think about the dream you had earlier, your desire only fuelled when he flirted with you with that ever so stunning smirk of his.

Seeing him shirtless was your last straw.

You needed alcohol in your system to survive this, to let yourself free. Sunghoon was already resting on the chair next to you by the time you opened your eyes again.

“I’m hurt,” he started, looking your way.

You raised your brows at his comment, “why? I thought you had company.” You took a sip of your drink, loving the bitter taste on your tongue.

Everyone was out of the water now, the gang was done with their water sports package as well, coming and sharing their experiences with a loud chatter, also talking about arranging a bonfire as the sky turned into the prettiest shades of yellow with orange and red hues.

“I do have company,” he whispered, coming closer for you to hear, “a very pretty one at that.”

He took the beer bottle from your hand, taking a long sip of it, your eyes fixated on how his Adam's apple bobbed as he gulped it down.

You snatched your bottle from him, watching as two drops trailed down his chest and towards his abs.

“Sorry, but you left your pretty company back in the water,” you huffed, smiling sarcastically before leaving to get a shower and change back into your shorts before the bonfire.

Sunghoon held on to your wrist before you could escape, pulling you so your back was flesh against his chest, his lips on your ear, brushing it slightly, “you sound jealous, princess,” he teased.

You turned to look at him, lips an inch away from his, your head tilting, “I have no reason to be jealous, Sunghoon,” you quipped.

With that, you walked away, knowing well you were jealous when you had no right to be so.

Sunghoon, on the other hand, was having the time of his life stealing your attention and having you to himself. Your reactions only encouraged him to do more, he wasn’t the one to flirt, however, he loved to get a reaction out of you.

Being together for two days was enough for Sunghoon to realize that his feelings for you never faded, it only grew more after spending more time with you. He couldn’t hide the smile forming on his face as you denied being jealous, it gave him hope that maybe, just maybe, he’d have a chance to win your heart. The fragrance of your body mist lingered around him because of the earlier proximity.

He swore it was his new favourite scent.

His eyes followed you, admiring your beauty from afar before he too went to get a shower and freshen up.

“So, you and Sunghoon, huh?” Yeonjun asked, sitting down on the sand next to you.

The shower did make you feel better, the cool breeze and the sunset creating a calming atmosphere, the bonfire in front of you only making it cozier.

The question caught you off guard, resulting in an awkward cough from you, “what do you mean?”

“Come on, anyone can notice the sexual tension between you two, or maybe I’m just observant,” he shrugged, “you can’t deny that he’s hot,” he pointed out helpfully.

“I’m not denying anything, but I don’t think anything will happen between us,” you pouted, watching the man walk towards your group, drying his hair with a towel.

A gesture so natural, but he made it seem so enthralling that you couldn’t help but stare.

“So you do think he’s hot,” Yeonjun followed your gaze with a smirk.

He wasn’t going to let this go, and you were sure of that, a groan leaving your mouth as you divert your attention towards him.

“I’ll help you get his attention, although I think you’re doing pretty fine yourself,” he lowered his voice at the last few words as Sunghoon sat down next to you, passing you his charming smile.

“Truth or dare,” Yeonjun asked you, starting to implement his plan, passing you another can of beer.

Sunghoon looked at you with curiosity filled eyes, jaw clenched slightly as he noticed your closeness with Yeonjun.

“Uh—truth?” You asked more than answering.

This also gained the attention of your group, everyone cheering to play a round of truth and dare just like the old times.

“That’s boring,” he scrunched his nose, “how about I dare you to kiss someone in this circle?”

“Yeah, no. I’m not playing,” you took a long sip of your beer, ignoring the series of disappointed noises coming your way.

“Why?” He whined, “I bet anyone would want a kiss from you,” he emphasized on anyone.

Sunghoon bit his lips, eyes never leaving your face as he saw you disagree, a small smile on his face at your rejection. He wondered if Yeonjun wanted the kiss for himself.

“He’s right, you’re beautiful and oh god, I remember the number of proposals you used to get on Valentine’s day,” someone pointed out, giggling.

Seems like everyone was drunk already and the night had just started.

That statement made Hoon go stiff as he remembered his own memory of confessing to you.

“Oh, that reminds me of the time Sunghoon had come to ask you out,” Karina mentioned with a mischievous smile, as if everyone was on a mission to have you and Sunghoon in the spotlight.

The said guy groaned, hiding his face when the topic he so desperately wanted to avoid, came up out of nowhere, secretly hoping that you didn’t find him weird after remembering the same.

“Sunghoon confessed?”

“What? When did this happen?”

“Did you reject him?”

A bunch of questions were thrown your way and you looked at Hoon with a panicked face, him doing the same, gulping.

“It was in high school, and that’s all we’re telling you,” you answered, dismissing the crowd.

“So you can kiss him as your dare,” someone proudly suggested.

He looked bothered and you frowned, “guys, no. Let’s not make him uncomfortable now,” you spoke gently and Yeonjun took the hint to change the conversation really quick, daring someone else to drink five shots in a go.

“Hey. Are you alright?” You kept your hand on his surprisingly warm ones.

“You’re cold,” he frowned, intertwining his fingers with yours and keeping them inside his jacket’s pocket, “I have to keep you warm, remember?” He smiled.

He was nervous, trying his best to divert the topic and you let him, scooting closer to feel his warmth.

“I didn’t know you had a boyfriend back then,” he confessed with reddened cheeks, “I was just so busy with exams and—”

“You don’t have to say anything, Hoon. I understand and I’m sorry for what happened that day,” you tilted your head to look at him, blinking slowly as you finally felt your alcohol kicking in, “you’re pretty,” you whispered.

Hoon was on his fourth can of beer already, his tolerance level not being too high, causing him to get drunk faster.

His heartbeat rose up when you said that to him, and he pulled you closer, “you’re the prettiest,” he whispered, tucking a lock of your hair behind your ear.

Everyone seemed to be in their own worlds, laughing at random things, playing music and dancing, however, your drunk self wanted nothing more than to be with Sunghoon, to kiss him, and it took all of your self control to restrain yourself from doing so.

Sunghoon pulled you closer and on his lap, your face buried in his chest and his arms wrapped around you. He wanted you more than ever and being drunk, he couldn’t help but pull you impossibly closer to him.

Despite everything, you did admit how his presence made you feel warm inside, and it wasn’t solely because of alcohol.

He bummed a song under his breath, you almost slept in his hold, his deep voice giving you butterflies. His embrace made you feel wanted, just like you had wanted him, and you indeed were in your own world, soon being disturbed by others saying it’s time to go back.

Someone made you drink water, and soon, you were in a cab with your best friend next to you, Sunghoon on the other side and Jay riding shotgun.

“Good night,” Yunjin sang out once you reached your hotel, Jay leaving soon after.

“Come with me, I want to sleep with you,” you whined, no control over your mouth anymore, you took Sunghoon’s hand, pulling him into your room.

“Y/n,” he whispered, closing the door behind him.

“Fuck,” he muttered out, seeing you remove your denim shorts, leaving you in your t-shirt as you climbed on your bed.

He followed, discarding his clothes and getting into the bed with you, a blanket covering your bodies. Your back was pressed against his muscular chest, his arm around your waist keeping you in place.

A soft gasp left your mouth as you felt his hot breath on your shoulder, his lips touching your skin, making it burn with warmth, “Hoon,” you softly whined.

“Yes, baby?” He continued placing open mouthed kisses on your skin.

“Kiss me,” you breathed out.

“Would you like that?”

“Yes, so much,” you confirmed.

“I want to kiss you,” he confessed, “but not when we’re drunk. If you ask that of me tomorrow then I’ll do it without question.”

You smiled even though he couldn’t see you, “okay,” you said softly, admiring how beautiful the man was.

You turned around to face him, “good night, Hoon,” your voice came out as a whisper.

“Good night , princess.” You felt his lips on your forehead before you drifted off to dreamland.

A dull ache in your head disturbed your precious sleep. Your eyes opened with a few blinks, settling down on Sunghoon, who laid next to you with his eyes capturing your each movement. You stiffened for a good second, remembering how hot his lips felt on your body the last night.

“Fuck,” you groaned, hand on your head as the effects of hangover started to kick in.

“Here,” he got up, passing you a bottle of water.

“Hoon,” you started, not sure what to say about last night.

“I’ll go,” he says, “I—I didn’t want to make things awkward between us,” he apologized, getting up quickly, putting his clothes on and leaving before you could say much.

“Ugh,” you groaned, hating how the situation turned into what it shouldn’t have been, you wanted him, drunk and sober, in both states.

But he didn’t know that. You were worried if he didn’t want that, or if his gestures were friendly all this time.

His kisses weren’t friendly last night, your mind reminded you, and you let out a series of curses at that, at how desperately you had wanted him to be close to you, all this in a span of two days.

Sunghoon was breathing hard by the time he locked his room, going straight in the shower. He was frustrated. The hot water droplets paired with his flashbacks from the last night, the way you said his name in a whisper, the way your bikini fit you perfectly, and how you looked at him like you wanted him just as much as he did.

He groaned, hand traveling down his skin to pump his semi hardened cock, gulping as images of you invaded his mind. With his head resting against the tiled wall, his fist moved on his length with speed, with need.

He had never jerked off to the thought of anyone before you came into his life again, it was his first time and he admitted, he didn’t know that just the thought of your body pressed against his would make him this hard.

With a moan escaping his lips, he painted the tiles white with his cum, your name leaving his lips as he stood there, breathing hard and deep in thought.

He had to have you.

Tonight.

“We’ll go first,” you tell Yunjin, getting ready together for the last night — the club night.

“Sure, but why?” she asked, trying to perfect her already perfect liner.

“I don’t wish to face Sunghoon,” you mumbled, sitting down on the bed to wear your heels.

She stopped her movements, turning to look at you, “I thought you guys hooked up last night, it was going well, wasn’t it?” She asked, confused.

“I don’t know, Yun. He didn’t do anything yesterday because we were drunk, which was very sweet of him, but then he left this morning without talking about it,” you explained.

“So talk tonight, and maybe do more cause you don’t have much time left,” she reminded you, “maybe go with Yeonjun’s plan too, Hoon would definitely reach out to you once he sees you with him. I’ve seen that he doesn’t really like when Jun’s with you, it shows on his face.”

“Really?” You asked with a frown, “making him jealous sounds very high school core to me.”

“So what? It works!” She smiled, “and I’m ready, how do I look?”

“Stunning, gorgeous, perfect,” you answered, “and I think I’ll take up your advice this time.”

She smirked, “let’s go and get you your man,” she said, coming close to you, getting a shade of lipstick out which suits you through and through, knowing well that it’s the perfect opportunity to use it.

Flashy lights, loud music, drinks and dancing bodies everywhere. It was easy to spot Yeonjun on the DJ stage, vibing to the music feely. Life of the party as always.

“Let’s grab some drinks,” Yunjin spoke in your ear, the music being too loud for you to hear much from a distance.

You nodded, following her and smiling when you saw a few people from your batch standing there and drinking.

“My ladies, you look hot,” Beomgyu said, kissing your knuckles and ordering drinks for you both.

Seems like making Hoon jealous won’t be a problem after all, especially when everyone has a flirty nature.

You weren’t going to drink today, you had to be sober and in your right mind, so you settled for orange juice instead, the music making you move on your own.

“My lady!” Yeonjun spoke up, popping out of nowhere, pulling you into a hug before he came closer to whisper, “you look stunning,” his eyes shining as he said so, “but I don’t see lover boy, where’s he?”

“Will be here soon I hope,” you replied.

“Dance with me, he’ll definitely come sooner if he sees you with me,” he smirked as you took his hand, taking up on his offer.

Yeonjun was a good company after all, your eyes widening at his bold moves before he pulled you in with a smirk, “lover boy’s here, and he’s looking at us,” he informed you, your eyes moving behind to look at him.

Sunghoon was agitated, he wanted you all to himself for tonight, and he wasn’t going to shy away today.

“Are you just gonna stand and watch while he takes away your girl?” Jay asked from beside him.

“Not today,” Hoon replied simply, his eyes following your actions, watching as Yeonjun took you to the bar, Gyu on the other side as you laughed about something you were talking about, whispering in each other’s ears.

Sunghoon scoffed, rolling his eyes as he walked towards you, he didn’t wish to be nice all of a sudden.

He stood behind you at the bar, eyes fixated on your face, the shade of lipstick you had on suited you so perfectly that he wanted to ruin it by smashing his lips onto yours.

Instead, he tapped on your shoulder, successfully capturing your attention as you finally looked at him thoroughly — he was clad in skinny jeans, a loose black shirt whose first two buttons were open, his chest slightly on display. A delicate chain on his slender neck, hair parted to the side to match his look and jaw clenched as he looked at you with a desire filled gaze.

“Can I steal you for a moment?” He asked.

“Yeah,” you nodded mindlessly, gulping at how fine he looked.

He didn’t wait for you to follow him, instead, he held on to your wrist and pulled you with him, your eyes widened at his bold move, your feet moving quicker to match his pace as he dragged you out from the back door, to an alleyway which was empty.

“Sunghoon—” you called out his name, but he was quick to push you against the wall.

His eyes looked into yours, they were dark with a feeling you couldn’t quite understand before he leaned in, “remember what you said yesterday?” he asked, nose touching yours.

“What?” your voice came out shaky, his fingers on your arms were enough to make you shiver.

“That you wanted me to kiss you,” he leaned in further, his lips brushing against yours with his statement.

“What about it?” you asked, trying to sound stern.

He scoffed, “I bet you’d love it if Yeonjun would do that.”

“I could be wrong, but I have a feeling that you’re jealous, Hoon,” you replied, a small satisfactory smile on your face when you saw him scowl.

He tilted your head upwards, his fingers holding your chin up so you looked into his eyes, “yes,” he breathed out, “because I want you all to myself,” he confessed.

“Fuck it,” you muttered, breaking your tough girl act and pulling him closer by his collar, your hand on his shoulder as you pressed your lips onto his.

He was quick to react, pushing you against the wall harder while also pulling you closer by your ass, his other hand on your nape. His lips moved against yours in a perfect harmony, you felt your knees getting weaker as his soft lips kissed you with no intention of letting go.

He separated your legs apart with his knees, pushing it in between them, you pushed yourself further till you could feel his thigh in between your legs, applying pressure to your core which had you moaning into his mouth.

“Fuck,” he cussed, separating your lips to place rushed kisses on your neck, your head tilting to give him space as you grinded on his thigh.

“Ah— Hoon,” you whined, causing him to stop his actions, his slender fingers wrapping around your neck as he pulled you closer yet again, speaking against your lips.

“I really thought I was over you after not meeting you for four fucking years,” he almost growled, “but no. I saw you at the party sitting next to me and I realized that I still want you, more than ever,” he whispered, staring deep into your eyes.

“I want you too, Hoon,” your voice came out breathy.

He let out a low laugh at that, “you sure you don’t want Yeonjun?”

He was jealous, he didn’t even deny that and you admit you found this side of him hot.

“His name wasn’t on my tongue when I touched myself yesterday,” you admitted, not missing the look of slight surprise on his face, “it was yours,” you tiptoed to whisper in his ear.

A smirk on your lips as you tried to leave, but Hoon was quick to pull you back, his hand on the back of your head as he pushed you against the wall yet again, and you loved how easily he handled you.

“You’ll be the death of me,” he said, “it makes me want to mark you up.”

“Do it,” you whispered.

He didn’t need to be told twice, his lips on yours, your fingers tugging at his silky roots, sighing in exasperation with the wetness pooling in your underwear, your mind going fuzzy and your insides melting.

He nips at your bottom lip, hand traveling down to cup your breasts, your back arching as you feel a shiver going down your spine.

Your short dress and its sheer fabric does nothing to help you, your skin feels as if it’s on fire with how passionately he kisses you, your hand going under his shirt, touching his abs softly.

He knows it’s not appropriate to do this in public, but he can’t, for the life of him, stop his hands from roaming all over your body, from his fang-like canines to bite your clavicle and his eyes darkening from lust as he sees your body responding to him exactly how he wants to.

“I won’t be able to stop myself anymore,” he grunted, taking your name.

“Take me back to the hotel,” you breathed out, capturing his hand into yours.

He nodded, hoping that his hard on won’t be visible as he drags you in between the sea of dancing bodies, biting his lip before you both get to the parking lot, getting into the car he had rented earlier.

His hand rested on your thigh the whole fifteen minutes of the drive, inching upwards which made you squirm in your seat, low whines leaving your mouth desperately.

“Shh, baby. I’ll have to park the car right here if you keep making such sweet noises,” he warned.

The offer was tempting—tempting enough for you to let out a moan, to which he did what he had to. He swiftly took a turn, parking the car at the empty lane, switching the engine off before he unbuckled his seatbelt.

He turned your way, lips on yours as he unbuckled your belt too, a gasp leaving your lips as he effortlessly pulled you to his lap.

“You’re so fucking pretty.” His thumb traced your lips, which you parted to suck on two of his digits. You could feel his hardened length just under your clothed cunt, you moved your hips slightly, just to get a reaction out of him.

“I want you,” you begged, unbuckling his belt as he watched your every move.

“I can’t believe I get to have you now,” he says.

“What do you mean?” You stop to look at him.

He puts his arm around your waist, picking you up slightly to get rid of his pants and boxers, “you’re the only person I’ve ever wanted,” he says, eyes on your dress strap which slid down your shoulder, “tell me what you want, baby.”

“You. All of you,” you answered in a beat, “I can’t wait anymore, I can’t stop thinking about you,” you said.

“You don’t have to,” he whispered, kissing a sensitive spot below your ear, his fingers pulling your panties to the side, pressing them to your wetness.

You held onto his shoulders as he rubbed your wetness, his cock poking at your entrance alongside, “such pretty moans,” he smirked, feeling you being a mess in his arms.

Your words came out in fragments, legs shaking as he pushed his fingers inside you, your back arching. His lips were busy placing kisses all over your tits, pushing your dress down to reveal all of you.

Sunghoon was a patient person, but not when it came to you, one he felt like you were prepped enough, he swiftly pulled you up, pressing his lips upon yours as he pushed you down on his cock, your walls clenching around his length, the stretch too pleasurable for it to pain.

You both muttered a string of curses before you started shifting your hips, his hands on your waist guiding you up and down, eyes closing but he was quick to grab your chin, “look at me when I fuck you,” he said, bucking his hips up to meet yours.

He loved how you looked, hair messy, lips swollen and eyes slightly teary as you tried to form coherent sentences but failed.

“Can you feel what you’re doing to me?” He asked, taking your hand and pressing it to your lower abdomen where you could feel his cock sliding in and out effortlessly, given how wet you were.

“I—I’m close,” you moaned, your nails digging into his shoulder.

“Let go, baby,” he said, groaning as he felt your juices coating his dick, your moans louder than before, eyes closed and his name on your lips.

He grunted, rubbing your clit as he slid out of your pussy, stroking his cock until he spilled his cum all over your inner thigh.

“I’m not done with you yet,” he breathed out.

And he didn’t lie, his movements were more frantic than ever as he drove back to the hotel with record speed, making sure to stay and help you look presentable, the small touches of him all over your face made you feel an feeling which you couldn’t quite name, it was indescribable, but you knew it gave you butterflies.

And you wondered how this guy who fucked you so roughly not even ten minutes back could also be this sweet and caring.

You giggled as you ran into the elevator, a smile gracing his own face at your giddy mood, “I don’t want this night to end,” he confessed.

“It won’t end just yet,” you said, taking out your room card and opening the door, which he closed equally soon as he pushed you against the wood.

“Let me taste you,” he requested.

You smiled, unzipping your dress and moving towards your bed while facing Sunghoon, letting the dress fall along with your underwear, uncovering your bare body to him.

He unbuttoned his shirt, discarding all his garments. You could finally see him in light, his eyes hooded, body sculpted by the gods themselves, the v-line and his big cock making you gulp as you remembered how good he felt inside you.

“Get on the bed,” he ordered you, to which you obliged.

“Spread your pretty legs and let me see you, baby,” he spoke, getting in between your legs, his chain dangling down.

The nickname made you shiver, Park Sunghoon made you feel weak, in all good ways, the way he kissed your thighs, inching closer to your inner thighs, so close to your core which was still wet, all of this made you breathless.

A pathetic whine of Sunghoon’s name slipped past your lips the exact second he licked your pussy, his big hands keeping your legs open, “eyes on me,” he spoke against your wetness, humming at the taste.

He wastes no time in immersing his tongue into your pussy, licking and sucking as you panted, thighs shaking.

You feel ecstatic as his thumb probes at your narrow depths, stimulating your clit while he pushes his tongue in, “want you so much,” he spoke against you.

“Hoon! Please, can’t wait anymore,” you said, pussy swollen and you needed his cock inside you.

“So needy, and for me?” He asked cockily.

“Y—yes! Please,” you begged.

“How can I say no when you ask so nicely?” He comes up, kissing you, making you taste yourself on his tongue.

His chain dangled around your collarbone, his intense gaze focused on your expressions as he pumped his cock a few times, his tip on your entrance.

He pushed himself in with a swift movement, bottoming out. He asked if you felt fine, giving you time to adjust, he moved in and out of you swiftly, body pressed against your warm one, his each thrust getting deeper with the roll of his hips.

You could swear you had never felt this way before, he hit your g-spot so precisely, and the feeling of him being inside you, all raw and thick, made you mewl with pleasure.

“You look so pretty,” he groaned, licking your neck where he had just marked you, “falling apart on my cock like that.”

Your toes curled each time he opened his mouth to whisper something filthy into your ear, making your head spin in a good way.

He couldn’t take his eyes off of you, your fucked out face, swollen lips and the innocent eyes begging him to go faster made it harder for him to hold back. He, in fact, didn't wish to hold back anymore.

He thrusted in harder, squeezing your tit as you cried out his name, your walls clenching around him, making his length twitch.

“Cum in me!” You moaned out.

“Y/N, are you sure?” He asked, cupping your face.

He had never done that before, neither had you, however, you wanted nothing more than to experience it for the first time and you wanted it with each other.

You nodded, “yes,” before he pushed his cock harder, as you rutted your hips absentmindedly to ride out your high.

The room smelled like sex, the mist clouding it as your sounds resonated the walls, you didn’t even try to conceal your bodies anymore.

“Oh, fuck!” He grunted.

Your orgasm ripped through you as you pulled his nape closer for his lips to be on yours, his own climax rushing as you felt the warming sensation of Sunghoon’s cum filling your cunt up to the brim.

You both stilled, taking deep breaths and coming down from your state of euphoria, gulping as you saw him looking right at you.

“C’mere,” he said softly, getting up and watching his cum dripping down on your sheets.

He helped you get up, taking you to the washroom to get freshened up, his cheeks red as he saw you come out in nothing but the shirt he was wearing earlier.

You smiled at him softly and waited for him to come out after washing up.

“Hey,” he said, getting into the covers with you.

“Hey,” you turned towards him, still feeling giddy.

“I can’t believe you’re real,” he said, touching your cheeks softly.

“Why would you say that?” You asked, keeping your hand on his.

“Before tonight, I had only ever dreamed of being this close to you, I never thought I’d even get to kiss you,” he spoke.

“Hoon, I’ve been thinking about you since we met again,” you told him, brushing his hair with your fingers softly.

That made him smile, “can I ask you something?”

You hummed, “yes?”

“Can we, y’know—” he fumbled with his words, making you laugh.

“Shh, we’ll talk tomorrow, yeah? Hold me to sleep,” you said, putting your arm around him.

His heart melted at the sight, and what made him happier was the fact that you didn’t just want him for sex, your smile expressed it all.

“Good night, baby,” he kissed you, just like last night. However, he kissed your lips tonight, making you giggle softly as you held onto him tighter.

He stared at you, not being able to hide his smile and wondering how he could ask you out again, especially when it would be easy for him to meet you since you both lived in Seoul.

The trip was officially over, and you could proudly admit that you loved every second of it.

Both Jay and Yunjin screamed in shock when Sunghoon kissed you at the airport before leaving for their own apartments, your flight being the same in which he couldn’t help but keep his eyes fixed on your seat.

A text popped up on your notification panel as soon as you reached your place.

Hoon <3:

hey

i was wondering if you’d like to go out with me sometime?

You:

as friends?

Hoon <3:

nooo, as something more :(

You:

what if i say yes :3

Hoon <3:

that’ll make me very very happy :D

You:

text me the date and time ;)

You smiled, loving how things had changed from the first time he asked you that question.

It was indeed a reunion that you could never forget.

THANK YOU FOR READING <3

© jaylaxies | tumblr

[theshinazugawaslut]

Sanemi is definitely the type of person that falls in love once and that's it

You can't tell me that, with the amount of walls the man has built, he would open them more than once

you start dating him and that's it, you're locked for life

I will always be on this train. No matter what AU or verse you put him, I think he'll always remain the same.

It's why you'll see me doing first love!reader or childhood friend!reader or wife!reader or usually virgin!Sanemi fics the most.

Sanemi's a really big family man (obviously) — I'm also incredibly family-oriented myself (my parents, my two little sisters, and my little brother are my whole life, like, quite literally). I don't think Sanemi necassarily cares about friends a lot, like he's not against the idea of them, but he'd rather hang around Genya or his mum or even his youngest brother (I'm the same).

So I think for him, the idea of being with someone is very special to him, so once he falls in love, that's it. Love is sacred for him. He's chasing you to the ends of earth, loving you till you're his and past that. "Till death do us part-" Nah, Sanemi's with you even in the afterlife, he's your husband/lover forever.

He's very guarded, like you said, so if you manage to peel back those layers, he's yours forever. I think he's guarded in every sense, in any AU, he keeps himself locked up for only his loved ones to see and sometimes he'll hide from them, too.

I think intimacy would be very, very sacred for him, too. He's definitely not the type to have hook-ups or one-night-stands or meaningless sex with no emotion, I just can't see that in him. Hell, you're his first everything: first love, first kiss, first hand-holding, first blush, first butterflies in his stomach. So when he loves you, he loves you. He'll let you take off every piece of clothing like you took off the layers of his heart and made him warm, so warm.

He's a one-woman man only and he takes pride in the fact, he's yours, utterly yours. He's a downbad simp and he's a-okay with that.

And you better agree with me, too.

[seramilla]

We need more of the vampire au like what were Vaggie's parents like cuz from the comments they were shitty but how shitty. Also Carmilla being Lady Dimitrescu is super true. Sorry for the ramble but I genuinely just wanna ask for hurt-comfort maybe all four are together and Vaggie shares something about her shitty parents then gets comfort.

Vaggie wouldn't normally have run out into the wilderness on her own. Not in the middle of winter. Not at night, when all manner of ghouls and monsters could meet her on the midnight mountain road, and do such unspeakable, maniacal horrors to her. However, at the time, Vaggie thought that fate better than the alternative.

Her entire life, she knew her parents would eventually marry her off to some noble's son. That fact was all she'd known since the day she was born, and her parents never let her forget it. As soon as she was to turn 18, she'd be shipped off to marry some stranger across the sea, whom she'd never met, and had no idea what sort of person they'd be. Would they abuse her? Would they beat her? Vaggie never wanted her life to be a bargaining chip.

So the night before her 18th birthday, she'd snuck out. And suddenly found herself being rescued by a fucking vampire of all people. She'd never told Carmilla the real reason she'd been out there that night, nearly frozen to death in the snow. It's been...how many years now? Dozens? Life as an immortal vampire makes the passage of time rather meaningless. Still, she and her adopted sisters thought it would be fun to tell stories of their lives as humans one night. All of her history had just....spilled out of her. She must have needed to get it off her chest. She feels better about it now.

Vaggie also hadn't intended on crying at the telling. But it's like, now that the truth is laid bare, all those emotions of her human self come rushing back. She buries her face in her hands, trying not to appear like a weakling in front of these powerful women. Weakness is one thing Carmilla usually doesn't tolerate...so it's a surprise when Odette of all people puts her arm around her, and Vaggie lays her head on the blond's shoulder.

"It's okay, Vags," Odette says, just letting Vaggie cry into her shoulder. "You can let it out sometimes. It's good for the soul."

"Yeah!" Clara says, punching Vaggie's shoulder lightly. Very lightly. It's more like an affectionate bump. "We all had shitty lives before coming here. We got your back, girl!"

Vaggie looks over at Carmilla, making sure it's okay. In front of her victims, Carmilla is a ruthless, unforgiving killer; one who takes no prisoners and brooks no quarter. But with her girls, once in a while...some of that softness that she rarely shows shines through. Just a little. Enough to make Vaggie feel wanted.

"Come here, mi amor," she says nonchalantly, holding open her wide arms for Vaggie. She smirks. "I only do this like once a decade, so you'd better take advantage while you can."

Vaggie falls into Carmilla's hug. She is thankful for the family that she found, and thinks They can all fucking die in a fire for all I care, about the one she gave up.

[cicerfics]

3, 24, 50 for bond & q :)

3. Obscure headcanon

Oh, it's so hard to determine what's 'obscure' in fandom! I am never sure which headcanons have been shared before, or how other people perceive this stuff.

But I guess my top 'uncommon' headcanon for Q is that he's on the asexuality/aromantic spectrum. I am totally capable of reading about (or even writing) allosexual Q, but in my heart, he will always be aro-ace to me! He makes an exception for Bond, because that's how it goes sometimes. But even with Bond, Q doesn't quite experience attraction in the 'usual' way. He's very intensely attracted to Bond in numerous ways, but not necessarily super 'horny' for Bond in the typical sense.

Obscure headcanon for Bond...honestly? I think Bond is a bit of a nerd! I think he's a jock and a nerd at the same time! I think he really likes learning obscure trivia, crossword puzzles, and books.

I think he's incredibly intelligent about a lot of things...a real polymath, in spite of the fact that he's also a 'blunt instrument'. I think he plays down his intelligence (though we definitely see glimpses of it in the films) because he likes to surprise people and he knows it's easier to do his job when people underestimate him.

But beyond his actual intelligence, I think he's downright nerdy in some of his interests and the sheer enjoyment he takes in learning new stuff. So that's my 'obscure' hreadcanon for him...'obscure' in the sane that it is not necessarily strongly supported by any part of canon!

24. Most annoying habit

Q is incredibly pedantic and bossy and stubborn. He will dig his teeth into a petty argument, and hold on for dear life. Honestly, I feel like he's actually better at letting important stuff go, because he tends to rationalize away his emotions (also a bad habit!) and bury any hurt feelings.

But if he's having an argument with someone about something that's honestly pretty meaningless? Q will go to the mat to defend his point. He will not let it go! Many people find this understandably irritating. (Bond delights in it, though, and he winds Q up just for fun.)

Bond, meanwhile, is an irrepressible contrarian and a complete brat. You say up, he says down. You say black, he says white. You tell him to do one thing, he'll do the opposite just to spite you. He enjoys being 'difficult' and he enjoys refusing to cooperate with people he doesn't like. Sometimes, he refuses to cooperate with people he does like, just because he takes unholy pleasure in annoying them. (See above re: Q.) He does not (and never did) play nicely with the other children. He just likes to be a pest.

50. A memory they’ve blocked out

Oof.

Okay, I tend to headcanon that Q had a pretty crummy childhood with parents who were mentally unwell/emotionally absent. And honestly, I think Q has blocked out a lot of his childhood. I don't think he realizes it, because he has clear memories of his education, the things he taught himself, his childhood pets, etc. But I think he's blocked out a lot of stuff that has to do with his parents and the traumatic things he witnessed while under their care.

For Bond...yeah. I think he blocks out the bad parts of his missions as best he can. I think he erects a mental wall around his memories of being tortured, and I think he refers to those incidents very flippantly because it helps him pretend this is something that happened to someone else.

I also think he blocked out a lot of happy memories from his childhood. I headcanon that he had a pretty happy childhood overall and parents who loved him (and each other). After he lost them, it was too hard for Bond to remember how good things used to be. So he just...doesn't think about it, if he can help it. The contrast between his childhood and his current life is too devastating for him.

(I am still open for asks on this topic, btw!!)

[restinslices]

hiii hope you're having a good day<3

i wanted ask for some Lin Kuei trio angst? like between the brothers? you can choose how to with the plot, im just really craving angst rn and would love if you could write it IF you're okay with it of course. thank you! (love your writing btw it's heavenly 😭🙏🏻)

I made a post a hot minute ago that was “LKBS X Enemy Reader MK1 Intros” and the plot was that the reader betrayed them and killed the other two brothers. So when you asked for angst, my initial thought was “huh… how would they react to their deaths?”. The reader is still like the Dimitrescu sisters because I’m unoriginal.

Doing Bi-Han this time around BUT if you'd like me to do this from Kuai Liang and/or Tomas’ POV (different scenario. Whoever's POV it's from is the one watching the others die) feel free to ask. Word count is 2964

Also we back in the gif era.

If you were to ask Bi-Han what the most powerful drug was, he'd say it was regret. 

“Regret isn't a drug” one would say. “You're wrong” is what he would say back. 

Regret was just as strong as any street drug, maybe even stronger. You only needed a whiff of regret, before it consumed your whole life and you started to regret small things that didn't even matter. Regret took a hold of someone and choked them until the air was forcefully pounded out of their lungs and until their skin turned cold. That's how Bi-Han felt at least. Like he couldn't breathe. Like his skin was colder than usual. Like he walked through his days but never actually lived. Like he was a dead man walking. 

The ice dagger cut into Kuai Liang’s skin so deep, it created a scar that ran up his face and over his eye. 

A warning. 

That's all Bi-Han wanted it to be. 

Kuai Liang couldn't possibly understand the stress Bi-Han was under as the Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei, nor could Tomas, and Bi-Han wouldn't wish such a fate on either of them even if he could. Only Bi-Han knew how it felt to be the leader of the most powerful clan, yet being forced to remain idle. The Lin Kuei were meant for more than this, how was it that Bi-Han was the only one that saw this?!

“End this brother!”, he commanded. “Embrace the future!”. His word was supposed to be law! He wanted Kuai Liang to end this meaningless fight and stand by his side like he always did. 

Kuai Liang stayed defiant and refused. Fine. Kuai Liang was just in shock. Bi-Han would defeat him and Tomas in combat, and when they awoke they'd listen to him and this entire fight could be forgotten. Just a quarrel between brothers. 

Bi-Han felt something on his shoulder and swatted at it. 

Just a fly. Whatever. 

Then there was another. And another. And soon, before Kuai Liang and Bi-Han could even begin their fight, a wave of flies flew towards them and knocked all three of them off of their feet. 

Bi-Han tried to gather himself when suddenly he felt the tug of someone pulling him up to his feet. Soft familiar hands that he held almost daily, and slid a ring upon years ago. He knew of your… condition. He just didn't know you had been following him. 

“To your feet Bi-Han” you chastised, which was unusual to hear from your lips, which usually spoke words in a soft and loving tone, even to your enemies. “I didn't knock you down as hard as I did them”. 

Your fingers caressed his arm as your lips slowly went up his neck and to his ear. Under any other circumstance, he would've took you right then and there, but none of it felt right. Besides it clearly being a terrible time to think about sex, something in his gut told him that something was wrong. 

He ignored it and that became one of his many regrets. 

“Well done Bi-Han” you spoke quietly into his ear. “Now kill them”. 

What? He must've heard wrong or maybe that was one of his own intrusive thoughts. Surely you wouldn't say something like that. Your relationship to his brothers was so strong, sometimes he shamefully became jealous. They say when you marry someone, you also marry into the family and you seemed to take that to heart. You wouldn't say kill them. He just hit his head too hard. 

“What?” he asked, hoping you'd say something like “I didn't say anything. Are you ok?”, but you didn't. 

“Kill them” you repeated. 

Now he knew he wasn't making this up. He turned to face you and pushed you away from him, and based on how your face bunched up for a second, you weren't pleased. 

“They hit their heads hard Bi-Han. They'll wake soon but for now, they're out. Kill them and end this. Do you think Kuai Liang would've spared your life?”. 

Yes. 

Kuai Liang could've killed him inside, but instead he just knocked him down and even now, Bi-Han had no doubt in his heart that although he was angry, he wouldn't kill him. Bi-Han didn't want to kill Kuai Liang either. He could've stabbed his brother in a vital place but no. He just gave him a scar. Maybe they were both fools trying to hold onto hope for the other. If that was the case, Bi-Han would gladly become a Queen's jester to show how much of a fool he was if it meant holding onto him. And although he wasn't the fondest of Tomas, he was still a good ally (even if he wouldn't say it out loud). 

“I'll imprison them until they come to their senses. I won't kill my brothers”

You scoffed, “you call Tomas your brother when he's passed out and can't hear you?”. He didn't understand your annoyance at the time. In his gut, something was screaming at him “take them out! This was all a trick and you fell for it! Redeem your name and take them out!”.  But that couldn't be true. You, the love of his life, couldn't be some master manipulator that planned for this. 

Bi-Han looked back everyday and wondered why he couldn't just listen to his gut. 

Your fingers no longer felt soft as they touched his face. They just felt cold. 

“My love” you said in your typical soft tone, “imprisonment won't work on them. You are the Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei and these two are traitors. They'll escape your prison and they'll make it their mission to take you down. You don't want that”. 

You were right. He didn't want that. 

But he didn't wanna kill them either. 

He looked over at their bodies, still laid on the hard ground and he hoped that something inside him would spark and killing them could suddenly feel easy. 

It never did though and you seemed to sense it. 

You made him look at you and even though he desperately wanted to feel comforted by you, your eyes seemed so distant and loveless. A flick had switched and he had no idea how or why. 

“You don't need them. Tomas is a false Lin Kuei, taken in due to pity. Kuai Liang can't face the truth about your father. Neither of them will ever understand you like I do. You only need me and your clan. Together… together we can be unstoppable. You just have to do this final thing”. 

He looked back over at them. 

“Do it Bi-Han” he coached himself, “Just do it. You let your father die. Why is this any different?”

His father was a grown man too far gone to see vision. Tomas and Kuai Liang just needed to listen to reason. 

“No” he said firmly.

The anger that he saw flash earlier set on your face, and this time you didn't feel the need to fix your expression. 

“No?”

“No”

He could see that infuriated you. 

“I've grown somewhat attached to you, so for your sake…” he could hear movement behind him, “I'll make it quick”. 

Bi-Han realized what was happening all too late. 

Your body broke down into thousands of flies and knocked Bi-Han onto his back. He looked over just in time to see Tomas just getting to his feet when your flies flew into his body, going straight through his chest and bringing him into the air as screams of agony filled the space. Just as quickly as it began, it ended and Tomas’ body fell down onto the concrete, his bones audibly cracking. 

The two brothers jumped to their feet and stood back to back. Bi-Han could practically hear his own heartbeat in his ears, but besides that he heard his brother's attempts to slow his own breathing. As his older brother he wanted to tell him it'd all be ok, even if his own heart was racing. 

“I didn't want this!” he said to both you and his brother. He wasn't sure if they'd make it, and if they didn't, he didn't want them to die with this false idea that he planned this all. 

You didn't care. 

Flies swarmed around him and Kuai Liang, the force of it ripping pieces of their skin and buzzing filling his ears. The two used their powers at the same time, Bi-Han freezing the flies on his side and Kuai Liang burning his. 

The buzzing stopped finally. 

His heart continued thumping hard in his chest and his injuries started to burn, making him wince. 

“You knew nothing of this?” Kuai Liang asked after some time had passed. They both had been standing there in silence, trying to avoid talking about the obvious and looking at the corpse. 

“No” he answered as he finally looked at his younger brother. “I didn't know this would happen”

“How didn't you know? What did you think would happen?” Kuai Liang said accusatorially. What did he think would happen? Anything but that. 

“I thought you'd listen to reason! The Lin Kuei have been idle for too long and waiting at Liu Kang's feet like dogs!” 

Kuai Liang went to say something but he was interrupted by something Bi-Han couldn't see. His hand gripped at his chest and his breathing became heavier. 

“Kuai Liang?” Bi-Han asked, his voice filled with worry. Kuai Liang started to look sick and he couldn't figure out why. 

Then Bi-Han saw something that continued to haunt his nightmares. An imagine he saw whenever he closed his eyes. What he imagined he'd see if he was put in his own personal hell. 

He heard the buzzing again and Kuai Liang’s blood splattered all over him as you burst from his body. 

You tsked. “Those pesky cuts”, a fly flew out one of Bi-Han’s cuts and found its way to your body, blending in with your skin. “Anything can get in them”. 

You looked so pleased and satisfied, like you hadn't done something absolutely horrific. Why?! Why would you do that?! How could you do something so monstrous?! Bi-Han was no saint, but what you did to Kuai Liang and Tomas… it was torture. 

“Don’t look at me like that Bi-Han. You were just too easy” he wasn't sure if your voice was full of sympathy or pity. There's a difference but it hardly mattered. “I'll be in touch”. 

He wanted to kill you. He wanted to rip you apart slowly and have your screams fill his ears, and for your blood to soak his hands, but you were gone just as fast as you were there. 

His younger brother's blood stuck to him and soaked through his uniform when he dropped to his knees. He wanted to grab at Kuai Liang and shake him awake, like he was just napping, but there was nothing to grab. There were only bits and pieces of flesh and organs that he couldn’t quite place sprawled out across the ground. 

“Gēgē! Look what I found!” Kuai Liang called as he ran towards Bi-Han with his hands cupped like he was holding water. Bi-Han finally saw what got his younger brother so excited when he got close enough; a little ladybug. 

“I told him to leave it alone” Tomas said in a huff. They were children and there was a good chance Tomas and Kuai Liang were playing around before the ladybug was spotted. That, or Kuai Liang made Tomas chase him for a bit before he ran to Bi-Han. 

“Ladybugs are good luck, right? Maybe it'll grant us a wish!”. Kuai Liang was so small, with cheeks plump and red and a smile wide and full of mischief. Kuai Liang calmed down when he got older, but as a child, he was always in something he shouldn't have been. His long hair was dirty more days than it wasn't. Proof of how hard he played during the day. He was banned from ever wearing the color white because of how dirty he got. 

“A ladybug can't grant you a wish” Bi-Han said dismissively. He was the exact opposite of his brother, and tired quickly. Tomas with all his bottled up energy (even if a lot of it was nervous energy) could keep up with him just fine. 

The wind blew and it must've carried a few critters, because a fly landed on Bi-Han’s shoulder. He swatted at it and Kuai Liang snickered, 

“I like my ladybug way more than your fly”

“Yeah?” The older boy asked with a raised brow. He grabbed the dead fly and without warning, he ran towards the two. To all their credit, the two were extremely fast and managed to stay together and on their feet. If Tomas hadn't looked behind him, and if there hadn't been an exposed tree root, he wouldn't have fell down. 

Tomas sniffed and Bi-Han knew he had to start doing his older brother duties. 

“Let me see” he tossed the fly to the side and knelt in front of Tomas. The boy turned, revealing two knees covered in cuts and blood and when Bi-Han looked at his face, his eyes were red but he did not cry. That was typical for Tomas. He always tried to act tougher than he was. 

“I didn't fall because I had my ladybug! See!”. Bi-Han rolled his eyes and took Tomas into his arms, 

“Yeah I see”. 

Tomas grumbled the entire time. Whatever pain he felt in his knees was nothing compared to the pain he felt to his pride. His grumbling only stopped after Bi-Han and Kuai Liang’s mother patched up his knees, but it seemed that now it was the oldest boy's turn to grumble. 

“Bi-Han” her voice reminded him of how beautiful pouring honey looked. She sat beside him on the floor and move strands of his hair out of his face. “You're slouching”. 

He fixed his posture and apologized quietly, instead of his typical response “no I'm not!”. 

Her fingers delicately touched his chin and moved his face to look at her, “what's wrong my sweet boy?”. 

“It's stupid”

“Nonsense. Whatever you feel is valid”. 

He looked over at his brothers, the ladybug incident long behind them based on their laughs. Tomas was laying on the couch with his knees still bandaged while Kuai Liang did an overdramatic replay of his fall. 

“I could've stopped him from falling. I should have”. 

“Kids fall all the time Bi-Han. It's ok”

“But I caused his fall. If I hadn't been chasing them with that stupid fly, no one would've been hurt. You and father tell me to be responsible as the oldest and as the soon to be Grandmaster, but that wasn't responsible at all”. Bi-Han debated how good of a Grandmaster he'd be everyday. It wasn't a small thing like “hey here's the car!”. He'd be in charge of a group of people. The clan's flaws would reveal his flaws, they'd look to him for guidance, he'd have to have this strong persona all the time and could never complain. Sure, he didn't agree with everything his father did, but he carried the weight effortlessly. He wasn't sure how he'd do that. 

“You're an interesting person Bi-Han. One moment you're upset about Tomas joining us, and the next you're caring about his injuries”. He knew she was trying to joke, but he wasn't in a laughing mood, so he didn't respond. 

“My sweet boy”, her hand caressed his face, “a good Grandmaster can try and prevent falls as much as he likes. A great Grandmaster knows how to be there for his people when those falls happen. Don't sulk. Join your brothers and laugh with them”. 

“What if I mess up in the future? Badly?”. A sympathetic smile spread across her face. 

“Everyone messes up. But there's nothing you can do that can't be fixed. As long as you're with your brothers, someone will always be there to pick one of you up when you fall. Just stay close to each other”. 

Laughter erupted from where his brothers were, and he looked back over at them. 

“You looked just like that when you fell!” Kuai Liang waved Bi-Han over, “come on gēgē!”. 

Regret is a sickening drug that clings to you like glue. The force of it squeezes you until the air is knocked out of your lungs and until you fall limp in its clutches. Bi-Han isn't sure how long he stayed knelt on the ground and covered in blood, but it was long enough for him to be found by Liu Kang and thrown into imprisonment. 

And as he sat there in his makeshift cell, out the corner of his eye he saw a ladybug crawling through the cracks. He couldn't help but let out a laugh. The laugh was joyless and full of nothing but sorrow. It was one of those laughs that quickly turned into tears and small sobs. The kind of laugh you let out when you lost everything and when you felt like a fool. 

The war for timelines raged on around him, yet somehow through the noise he heard the familiar buzz of flies approaching. 

He hoped that this timeline was destroyed and that somehow he was reunited with his family and they found it in their hearts to forgive him. 

He hoped in the other timelines he made better choices and either got his goal without bloodshed, or completely abandoned it. Anything but what happened. 

Such a pity hope was as useless as pouring water into a river. 

Such a pity he’d live with his regret for years to come.

Lowkey I didn’t have to add the reader betrayal part and it could’ve focused on the actual kanon but dead brothers is fun so ya know-