#lex luthor adopted tim drake

[hannahhook7744]

Shenanigans on Tumblr!;

Based on this:

[anxi04]

Tim meeting Lex at a gala when he’s young. and becoming gossip besties with him

i finally wrote it after it infesting my brain enjoy

——————-

Tim thought the gala was going to be like most of the others, boring, annoying, nothing happening. And then he saw Lex Luthor. And he's a smart man, probably the only other smart person in here so why not start a conversation?

Lex thought this gala was going to be boring and a waste of time. And then this small child comes up to him talking about gossip that he didn't even know? And mentioning his incredibly secret cloning project he just started a week ago? He's going to be a villain and Lex wants to be on his good side.

————————

Tim sighed, annoyed. Gala's have always been incredibly boring, the only slightly fun things that happen at them have been either Bruce Wayne "tripping" over something and drenching someone else with whatever drink or liquid is near, or overhearing gossip, such as Robert Dewitt cheating on his wife with his brother. That was a fun day.

This gala is looking to be about the same as always, just even more boring. Bruce Wayne isn't attending (understandable, The Joker just broke out of Arkham again. He's sure there's a cover story for why Bruce isn't here but he doesn't care about that), no one is drawing attention to any scandals yet, or at least not in his ear range.

The only vaguely interesting thing here is Lex Luthor actually attending it for once. The man usually never spares a moment for anything aside from Metropolis (disgusting) and Superman. So there's at least one other smart person here but he also happens to be a super-villain (not that the general public knows) so… Not like Tim can just walk up to him and talk right?

"So as I was saying it really is quite unfortunate that your son won't take the company, I always thought he was a rather charming young man-" Fuck it Tim's gonna go talk to the super-villain.

"Have you heard about Rebecca Strawling?" Tim asks Lex, who absolutely did NOT jump at this child sneaking up behind him (seriously how did he do that? Even Superman, a man who constantly floats, can't sneak up on him.). Lex blinks for a second because, yes he had and holy shit what a thing that is, and also how does this child know? Also why is this child talking to him?

"That… Depends. What have you heard?" Lex says hesitantly. Despite Rebecca's… everything, she still hid it incredibly well. If Lex wasn't so bored at these gala's he would never have known, so either this child is just incredibly nosy, or possibly an actual smart person in this room. Either option would prove far more interesting than what he had been doing.

"Well I've heard about the several affairs she's had with everyone she claims to hate. Business rivals, the poor, queer people, her husband's family, and if it's to be believed her own family." And… Holy fuck, Lex had not been aware of that last bit. He raises an eyebrow at the ending which prompts a slight grin from the child as he takes his phone out. "I have evidence."

Does Lex actually… Enjoy being near a kid barely in the double digits? Absurd.

"You know Tim, that man over there? He's almost bankrupting his company and family by sending their money to a 'client.' I believe all his business partners are looking for someone to replace his spot." It's been an hour and a half. This is the most entertained Lex has been at one of these in decades. If Tim finds himself following the black hair, blue eyes orphan trend Lex will take him in himself so help him God. He's insanely smart, not only is he excellent at reading people and finding dirt on them easily, he's incredibly skilled at hacking without any proper training on it. This is a villain in the making and Lex will not let himself fall on his bad side.

"Now, I have a moral question for you Tim. What do you think the ethics on making a weapon out of a clone would be?" He's been toying with the idea of cloning Superman lately, however the actual… Making it a weapon has been bothering him. If it comes out an adult man it could easily decide it wants to do something else and rebel, however what would the effects be on making a child weapon that was created for that sole purpose? The effectiveness of it?

"Easy. Don't make the clone a weapon. It's either an adult clone who could choose to be a soldier, and actually listen to you, or decide it won't listen and possibly end up exposing you. If it's a child clone then sure you get a weapon for a few years but not having a choice would end up making them resent you. Give them a choice on it, just like the Sidekicks, like Robin, Kid Flash, Speedy, all them. I'd assume you would want a meta clone anyway and most meta's feel a sense of duty with their abilities so it'd be likely for them to decide something along what you want. Just a matter on if they like you and go with you, or turn to the other side." Tim answers without missing a beat and wow what a concerning sentence that would be to hear from a child if he were anyone else. As it is he's delighted by the response.

"Although cloning a Kryptonian would probably alter it, simply wouldn't get enough material so you would likely have to substitute some of the material for human and at that point use your own and raise the clone as a child." What. That's far too specific. "Oh, sorry I probably should've kept it more broad. Anyway you should update your security systems." Definitely a super-villain in the making. One that he very much wants to be on the good side of. On that note now he needs to update his whole system.

"Ah, Tim I'm glad you picked up. I'm a father now! I'd like you to meet my son, his name is Kon-El-"

"Oh, I've already met him. You actually interrupted our call. Kinda late on telling me." Of course.

"You know I could adopt you as well, get you from that bumbling buffoon that is Wayne."

"Yeah but then my crush would become incestuous." His what? Know what he can work with this. Tim is joining his family one way or another.

Finally. A moment of peace for Lex to sit down, drink some coffee, and watch a rerun of his favorite show. "Luthor!" Oh great, the boy scout here to ruin his plans. Oh and is that his group for comic-con? There's the man of steel himself, Wonder Woman, Batman and… Wait. Oh this will piss Kal-El off to be ignored.

"Timothy! I was just about to call you. You remember Robert Dewitt, correct? You'll never guess what he's done now." Lex grins, standing up. He was meaning to update Tim on this particular… Creature. He's one of their favorites to catch up on, purely because of the absurdity of his debauchery. Although this time does have a reason, after all there's reason for dear old Robert to get locked up this time and he's been making some comments about Lex lately and well he can't just let that slide now can he?

Tim blinks for a second then realizes what Lex just said. "Wait you know? Of course you do why wouldn't you.. Actually wait that doesn't matter what the fuck did Robert do? Last I knew he wasn't allowed outside without an escort so I was expecting longer." Lex has a feeling it does in fact matter very much if the way Batman's eyes narrow and his jaw clench indicate anything. Lex needs to continue on or possibly get put in a hospital.

"Oh he's no longer allowed near animal shelters, so-" Kal-El cuts him off, incredibly rudely if he might add.

"What… What is going on here?" Poor man sounds so confused. Lex is savoring this moment.

"Well I know Timothy Drake is Red Robin. Clearly. Red Robin is the hero closest to becoming a villain which fits Tim quite well, and also Tim is the only Gothamite smart enough to be Red Robin. And infuriating enough to personally annoy Ra's al-Ghul on a regular." It's very simple honestly. Lex has no idea what's making this so complicated. "If it helps make you all feel 'safe' and 'secure' I could tell you about the time Timothy told me he had a crush on Kon-" And now Tim's thrown something at him. What is this, interrupt Lex day?

"Shut up! What if I told them about you and Clark Kent?" Ahh, expose his crush, get his own crush exposed. Well unfortunately Lex has no shame about that.

"You mean the man who could lift a 200 lb person with no effort? One of the very few good reporters?" Odd that Kal-El's face is getting red and confused but oh well. "Honestly though, who cares. You know Tim my offer for adopting you still stands. I know it must be absurdly easy to hide being Red Robin from your… family. However I think I could be of more assistance still." Batman's hands are clenching now. Interesting. "I mean you made a fake uncle to get out of being adopted by the oaf, I don't know why you didn't just let me." Ah, Batman's hands are unclenched. He must have thought that uncle was also real. Surprising, really, from 'The World's Greatest Detective' however they clearly have the wrong bat. "And does he even know about your missing spleen? Really, I should get him locked up for child neglect. Even I would notice if anything happened to Kon-El."

Tim's eyes widen at that and snap to Batman's equally wide eyes. They both jump into a sprint, Tim leaping out of a window with the Bat close behind. "Oh, did he not know? Oops."

Perfect. Hopefully that'll have been absurd enough that the Justice League leave him alone, and he can watch his show in peace.

[spacedace]

It feels to much like crack to actually include it in the House of Elle series (where Elle ends up getting adopted by Tim & Kon after ending up in the DC universe), but I've been haunted by the idea of Elle deciding to spend time with her "grandparents" and the chaos that comes with that decision.

Like, in particular I'm just imagining Lex, holding her out in front of him like a bomb, chasing after Superman (who is flying for his *life* because Elle just ate her own weight in Kryptonite while staring directly into his eyes without blinking) screaming that it's Supes' turn with the demon.

While they're distracted yelling at each other publicly that no, it's *your* turn, Ra's grabs Elle planning to hold her hostage or something and use her against Tim.

He lasts ten minutes.

He tries returning her to Lex & Superman, but it's too late. She's smelled his fear. He's never getting rid of her now. He begs Bruce for help, but just gets told that they all appreciate him volunteering to babysit. (Bruce was the one Elle started with. She brought the dinosaur to life. Damian's adopted it.)

Eventually Lois shows up and just, scoops Elle up and takes her along on her latest story. She says Elle is a perfect angel. No one is sure if which of the two they should be more scared of.

Meanwhile Tim & Kon are just blissfully enjoying their date-day, fully aware of the chaos their little adopted hellion is causing and enjoying every minute of it while ignoring the increasingly frantic calls from their various father figures. Elle will let them know if she needs them.

[oncillabrigade]

OH MY GOD the idea of Bruce and Lex as machatunim?! PLEASE?!

Also consider:

Kon: Psst, Rob, what in the hell is a machatunim?

Tim: No clue. I texted Dick and got the answer, "This will open a very long, very Jewish rabbit hole. How ready are you to hear Bruce rant about YIVO and the 'razor-thin' line between language preservation and in-group gate-keeping?" So that's ominous.

Kon: Yeah, no, let's live in ignorance.

Tim: But babe, I love cursed knowledge!

Bruce: Connor Kent, the only reason I haven't become your step-father and ground you for your insubordination is because that would make Lex Luthor my in-law somehow, and my heart can't handle that.

Tim: Uh B? Kon and I are-

Bruce: Don't say it. I'm still pretending that you wouldn't hurt me this way

Connor: I feel about 50% offended

Tim: Well, you're 50% Luthor, so that makes sense

[vodrae]

Gotham being her own entity apart of the rest of the World thus every meme have Gothamite's equivalent. If you have a smartphone in Gotham you have seen my honest reaction memes starring Brucie Wayne.

Instead of Joe Rogan and other UFC commentators when you have to express something is exceptionnal, you have Jason, Duke, and Steph when Cass bitchslapped Lex Luthor.

When you are fond of something, you have Harley Quinn's face, in her orange clothes wearing cuffs at Pamela Isley's conference on ecology.

When you are craving something, you have the rich cougars looking at Dick Grayson's ass.

When you are envious, shocked or horny, maybe all three together, you have the legendary video of Wayne Fondation to promote exercice and healthy lifestyle when Bruce Wayne appears in tank top and Wonder Woman who accepted to be there who could discover properly for the first time Brucie's F cup boobies.

"He said no pickles !" But it's Cass and Jason. Works with joke about power balance and size.

What's happening with Dick and Jason spotted with a SO always taller and ginger ? (WTF Wally is 6'10 ??)

Gotham is still not over discovering Tim Drake is a sleeper build. Why is he jacked like that ? Why even the BUTLER is ripped ?!

Every post trying to promote Joker is filled with Red Hood gif, Batsignal and Oracle dropping all the user's informations.

99.9% of the housewives between 18 and infinity in North America are watching the annual interview of Brucie by Clark Kent. Their discution is also a "me when I meet someone as weird as me" template

Stephanie's very much loud on the very hot microphone "Please step on me" to Dinah when they competed in a Family Feud episode againt the Queens. The others were laughing but nodding

Damian's mugshot at 4'8 for assault. He saw someone with a coat made with an endangered specie.

A spotted paparazzi picture with Catwoman, Batwoman, Bluebird, Poison Ivy and Harley named "The lesbian spectrum".

And a lot, enough to feed a country, of memes about getting adopted by Bruce Wayne.

[zylev-blog]

Masterpost

This is the masterpost for everything that I have posted, not reblogged or added on from someone else.

DCU Only

The Batkids hide in Batman's cloak: here

DP Only

Ghosts as a separate species: here

DpxDc

Danny-centric

Young Danny: here

Danny really hates Christmas: here

Failed Ghost Danny: here

The Purge: here

Secret Arms dealer: here

Danny is Jon Kent: here

Martian Danny: here

Danny's being followed: here

Danny is Bruce Wayne: here

Danny is the clone of Barry and Hal: here AO3 link: here

Danny is Ace the bathound: here @bloggerspam wrote a beautiful fic for this!

Danny goes back in time to kill villain Tim: here

Danny is Diana's daughter: here

Danny arrives during DCeased: here

Danny is Alfred's son: here

Danny is centries old: here

"My name is Danny Fenton, and this is Jackass.": here

Danny is the son of Clark Kent and Lana Lang: here

Danny is convinced Batman is a vampire: here

Danny is Deadshot: here

Danny infiltrates the Light: here

Danny is Jason Todd: here

Danny pays Diana a visit: here

Dan-centric

Dan meets Jason Todd: here

Red Lantern Dan: here

Dan raises Kal-El: here

Jazz-centric

Jazz gets drunk: here

Halfa Jazz: here

Jazz is Lex Luthor's daughter: here

Tucker-centric

Tucker is Amity Park's protector: here

Dani-centric

Dani wants to get arrested: here

Dani is from the future: here

Dani is the clone of Bruce and Danny: here

When Dani destabilizes, Superman stabilizes her dna. She doesn't appreciate this: here

Danny is Clockwork's assistant

Clockwork's assistant au: here

Apprentice of time au: here

Green Lantern Danny

Adult GL Danny: here

GL Danny in Justice League: here

GL Danny helps arrest his parents: here

Danny and others:

Danny and Jazz go to a gala: here

Danny and Dick talk during a stakeout: here

Damian's rant: here

Cujo steals Jason's gun: here

Danny haunts Batman: here

Wally crosses into the DP universe: here

Bruce trains with Phantom: here

The Phantom siblings like to throw things: here

Gotham is on fire: here

Danny and Sam make a bet: here

Flash, Batman, and Joker accidentally cross into the DP universe: here

Danny and Bart are from the future: here

Dani and Dani decide to crash Bruce's interview: here

Mind-controlled Superman crashes Danny and Sam's date: here

Damian and Danny are best friends: here

Danny haunts Batman: here

Dick and Danny talk: here

Dick and Danny are childhood friends: here

Danny rescues Bruce in 1732: here

Jason and Danny kill the Joker: here

Deaged Danny

Danny escapes CADMUS: here

Danny and Dani are adopted by Aquaman: here

Oliver adopts Danny: here

Clark adopts Danny: here

Barry adopts Danny: here

Teen/Adult dad Danny

Ellie and Damian's forced friendship: here

Single Dad and toddler Ellie meet Single mom Kara and baby Kal: here AO3 link: here

Danny is Klarion and Nabu's Dad: here

Danny is Zeus, and Diana's father: here

Other:

Dick throws a party for his 30th birthday: here

The Batfam discover the GIW's warehouse by accident: here

Freakshow and Joker are brothers: here

Tim accidentally creates a portal to Amity Park: here

Dick accidentally saves Danny instead of Tim: here

Danny becomes backup Red Robin: here

Deaged Dick: here

Jazz, Harley, and Bruce are in medschool together: here

Halfa Tim Drake: here

Villain Fentons au: here

Valerie doesn't want to be on a hero team: here

Dick and Damian are ducks: here

Kryptonian Jack Fenton: here

Amity Park is its own nation: here

Villian Fentons: here

A Turkey ghost sends the Fentons on a country-wide chase: here

Little Baby Man Danny: here

Conner is Phantom and Superman's clone: here

Kryptonian Danny: here

Ships:

Dash/Danny: here

Tim/Danny: here

Tim/Danny gods of Krypton: here

Damian is Jazz and Bruce's son: here

Valerie/Danny raise Dani: here

GL Jazz/Bruce: here

FBI Agent Jazz Fenton(Nightingale): here AO3 link: here

Stephanie/Danny: here

[hannigramislife]

NEW DC PERSON!!!!!!

hello im going to give you some tidbits

DO NOT TRUST FRANK MILLER’S COMICS. His Batman: Year One is good, but everything after that is bad. Seriously, his batman got nicknamed Crazy Steve because of the belief that this could not be Bruce.

Young Justice did not actually kill Santa, they simply witnessed his death. Also Constantine snorting his bones was unrelated.

Tim Drake is canonically some flavor of queer (i think he’s bi) and has a boyfriend

Dick Grayson was killed by Lex Luthor once but he came back immediately and was turned into a spy

Jason Todd was 4’6 and 87 pounds when he died so it’s extremely common for fans to think that jaybin (jason-robin) was adorable.

Tim Drake attempted to clone his best friend (Superboy aka Kon-El) 99 times. If you want to see what that would have been like if it worked and they became a couple, go to Timkon Clone Baby AU.

If you like crossovers, get into Miraculous Ladybug, Danny Phantom, or White Collar. (I like Danny Phantom and White Collar). Though DCxDP might not be for you if you dislike vivisection.

Clones are common. They’re just around. Off the top of my head there’s Bizarro, Superboy, Terry McGinnis, Robin of Zur-En-Arrh, Heretic, Will Harper, Match, Inertia, etc.

Billy Batson is *baby*. We call him Captain Marvel still because it makes no sense for the word he can’t say to be his hero name. He was 8 years old and homeless when he became a superhero and happens to be the God of Gods. If you like secret identity reveals, it’s common in the Captain Marvel fandom.

Bruce Wayne’s legal kids are Dick Grayson (flippy Robin) Cassandra Cain (understands all body language), Jason Todd (dead Robin), Tim Drake (smart Robin), Duke Thomas (human lightbulb/gang Robin), and Damian Wayne (stabby Robin)

OMG HELLO! THANK YOU FOR THE WELCOME!

1. This is the second time I see Frank Miller mentioned and he scares me haha.

2. Constantine is fucking insane and I love him.

3. I know he's queer! Dating Bernard now! I'm so happy for him.

4. Omg is that the whole Spyral thing?? I need to know. How come ppl don't obsess over that death?? The fanfics for Dick are solely lacking.

5. JASON SMOL. I'M CRYING.

6. They were canon in a universe?? Really?? Fucking wild. I need it.

7. Somebody NEEDS to explain the Danny Phantom and White Collar thing to me. It's a NEED. How??

8. Love the clones!! Incredible idea. I'm so sorry Kon doesn't get the love he deserves from Superman :((

9. Captain Marvel is great! I saw him in Young Justice only. Does the movie Shazam do him justice?

10. Aksnalsnalsks the way you described them killed me. I'm glad Dick was adopted! I read he was adopted as a child. And can someone tell me what Duke's story is?? Cuz idk. Also, I love Damian so much, he's my baby.

[jessilynallendilla]

DPXDC SUPERMAN AND CONSTANTINE FIC REC

TITLE/LINK RATING COMPLETED-WORD-COUNT SERIES

DP FIC REC HOME POST

let me know if the links aren't working and feel free to suggest any

& SUPERMAN 

Lex Luthor's Chance Of Fate  G 3,730 SERIES 

Years ago, Lex met a little boy at a tech convention. Some thirteen years later, they meet again. He's just as sassy as Lex remembers too. 

Two For One Special  T 12,583 

While in Gotham, Clark gets mistaken for Bruce Wayne. He's not alone in his dilemma, however, because a teenager by the name of Danny is also mistaken to be Tim Drake. At least Clark's having fun with his fellow captive. 

Oh Him? Don't Pay Him Any Attention He's Just Our (Resident Cryptid) New Intern  T 

Lois just wants to protect Danny, Clark just wants to adopt Danny, and Danny just wants to keep his job and NOT get fired. Jimmy Olsen wishes he wasn’t a professional photographer who could clearly tell that Danny Fenton is a spitting photoshop color reverse image of Danny Phantom. Perry White wishes he hired someone else. Needless to say, the Planet is a mess. 

You With The Sad Eyes  M 12,641 SERIES 

All it takes is an attempted kidnapping gone sideways for the Kent family to (eventually) gain a new member. Follow Jon and Clark as they try to unwind the mystery of the meta boy named Danny and all the secrets he keeps. 

Living Is Hell, What Else Is New?  T 5,546 SERIES 

A Connor Kent from a universe where Superman is a huge jerk arrives to the Like and Survive universe right in front of the Teen Titans. Kon takes his new identical brother home to meet his dad. 

Foundling At The Door  T 25,987 SERIES 

Kon had half a second to think so much for the quiet day before the tear in reality warped and twisted in ways that his mind simply refused to comprehend, bolts of green lightning arching out of the shattered mess leaving scars in the sky as a horrible after-image. And then someone fell out of it. A tiny, injured figure tumbled out of the break in time and space, plummeting to the ground in tattered hospital scrubs stained red and green. He moved before he could think, darting forward in the air to grab the battered body, not caring what else might come out of the ominous tear in reality above them. Elle escaped the GIW, if barely. Unfortunately the portal she created has sent her not to the Ghost Zone, but an entirely new dimension - one that doesn't have enough ectoplasm for her to survive, let alone leave. Badly injured and surrounded by strangers, the best option she has of surviving is going along with the assumption that she's a Kryptonian, whatever that is. At least Not-Danny and his boyfriend are nice. 

The Cryptid Of Smallville  G 

Danny gets de-aged and Clockwork sends him to the Kent’s because they’re used to raising superpowered children and time moves different on their Earth. A collection of connected one-shots surrounding the ten years Danny lives with the Kent family. 

Star Child  G 1,291 SERIES 

Although Martha lost her unborn baby, that doesn't stop her from being a mother. Nor does it stop her from showing kindness to strangers. She is surprised to see how one stranger shows his appreciation. 

Tomato Farms And Runaways  G 1,511 

It's amazing how much money merchandise can get you, enough to per-se... get way. Enough to leave behind a bad situation. It's not like he wanted to leave home, but with his parents finding out about the accident, and him being Phantom, there were no other choices left for him. Not with his parents on the loose looking for the "ghost who kidnapped their poor son and impersonated him". And after all, he could use a break. They all could. Him, Sam, tucker, jazz. 

Just the Typical Weirdness  G 6,622 SERIES 

Just a little ficlet with the idea of "Esperanto is Ye Olde Kryptonian" 

Get That Out Of Your Mouth (You Don’t Know Where It’s Been!)  NR 

Spring break, really just a great opportunity to try for the, well, who really knows how many times, to try and map out the Ghost Zone! Unfortunately for Danny, this little field trip of his has taken him much farther from home than expected. In a place that is simultaneously very different, and very similar to his world, Danny Fenton is trapped in Metropolis, powers weak and his own self following after, he needs to either find a way home, or a new source of the ectoplasmic energy he’s living off of. Meanwhile, in the home team, Lex Luther’s change of heart has everyone on high alert, especially as the lives of teenagers become pawns in a dangerous game of chess. Robin and Superboy, Superman and Red Robin, are all pressed to prevent such a catastrophe before it’s too late. 

& CONSTANTINE 

It's Hard To Make Friends When You're Half In The Graveg 886 SERIES 

For the record, neither Barry nor Oliver know how a teenaged Eldritch Abomination got into headquarters. They do know, however, that it's obviously Constantine's fault. 

A King's Gamble  G 

As tensions grow between Phantom and Plasmius, both vying for the title of King heir, the instability of the Ghost Zone affects Earth, pulling a reluctant John Constantine into the world of ghosts and ghost hunters. 

Beach Day Demons  G 4,823 SERIES 

John Constantine mistakes Danny as a possessed teen while he’s on his break to the beach. Chaos ensues! 

Afterimage  G 2,277 

The Justice League are having trouble with a ghost and Constantine really want to deal with it before the ghost's king comes to collect his wayward subject. Bruce thinks it sounds like a good solution for someone to come and collect the untouchable enemy until he suddenly, horrifyingly, doesn't. Barry let out a yelp and Bruce instinctively flinched backwards as he could feel his skin tingling, hands spasming, muscles twitching, and hear stuttering in his chest as the electricity in the air surrounding them increased increased increased. 

“The king has arrived,” Constantine choked out through clenched teeth. 

Really, Danny just wanted to take Skulker back to the Zone. 

Danny What The Fuck??  T 3,731 

Phantom is almost comically overpowered compared to the Justice League on account of not only being a boy king of an alternate dimension, but also because he fought creatures from said alternate dimension and whilst Constantine did that too -on a rather unfortunately regular basis- he didn't fight Darkside level threats on his own at fourteen years of age. Hence how overpowered Phantom was. But he was also still a boy, which might be how Constantine found himself looking down the barrel of a gun. 

Hellblazer And The Phantom  T 

After John Constantine finds himself in Amity Park, Illinois (courtesy of the House of Mystery), he learns about the ghosts of the town, most notably the Ghost Boy, AKA Phantom. When John is strong-armed by the Fentons into helping during a ghost fight, a wayward spell hits Phantom, erasing all memories he has of his human life. Considering the alternative is letting the Fentons experiment on him, John takes the young ghost kid under his wing. However, both of them are in over their heads as they try to get Danny's memories back, and Constantine is NOT father potential. 

Surprise First Meetings With Eldritch Beings Are NOT Fun.  T 1,909 SERIES 

People go missing all the time. It’s a sad fact but true. So it doesn’t catch the Justice League’s attention in the beginning. But when bodies start to be found in failed summoning circles, it finally pings on their radar. Bad news, they can’t tell who, or what, the cultists are trying to summon. 

Be Not Afraid (Or Whatever)  G 1,192 SERIES 

The weather god- though Constantine swore it was 'just' a ghost- had pinned down the entire Justice League. While they'd managed to trap Vortex in a two square mile area and evacuate civilians, and even arrested the cult responsible, they in turn were trapped in a small warehouse, protected only by the blood blossom spray and salt circle Constantine made. Enter the terrifying and awesome (and Barry means that in the biblical sense) Ghost King, stage right. 

Dimensional Sector D3C8QX9 And Why It Sucks (Less Than You'd Think)  T SERIES 

"…Wait. Oh. Oh, no. Oh, fuck. It's that dimension. Why'd have to be that dimension? Urgh, getting back is gonna be such a pain!" 

The Leaguers present exchanged unnerved glances. An eldritch abomination they couldn't contain nor defeat being angry about their stay didn't exactly bode well. 

"What do you mean?" 

The endlessly black eyes singled in on Barry, making him shrink back. For some reason, he doubted even he'd be fast enough if the being in front of him decided to hunt him down. 

"What I mean" it said with a grin willed with too many teeth and too little emotion "is that I'm stuck here for now. And you better buckle up, buddy, because I just decided just now to make it everyone's problem." There was a pause in which the eery glow around the being pulsated. "I'm so going to find whoever did this and move all their furniture two inches to the left." 

Wait, what? 

The Impossible Summoning  G 8,530 SERIES 

There's a new Ghost King in town, and among those freaking out from this news is the Justice League, who want to know if this is something they should be concerned about. Fortunately, John Constantine and Zatanna Zatara are on the case and have a copy of the ritual to summon the ghost king. However, someone, possibly the Ghost King or the ritual's author, really doesn't want the summoning to work. 

Pay Your Dues  T 

For Bruce, the beginning of the end began on an unassuming day in April. Or... John Constantine gets arrested and is sent to trial in the Infinite Realms. Somehow, Bruce's life is worse for it. 

John Constantine Goes To Amity Park.  T 14,811 

John Constantine goes to Amity Park and meets the Fentons. 

The Time I Got Summoned To A Different Dimension To Help Batman's Son  NR 2,129 

Danny became the ghost king after defeating pariah dark. He never really thought of any consequences to that, other than being a ruler of the dead of course. Which meant even less time to sleep and study for school, but still, that was the only downside to being the ghost king. Or, well, at least as far as he bothered to think it through. So yeah, he's quite surprised to find he can be summoned now. And also surprised to be finding it out as he's summoned away from his house to some meeting hall surrounded by people in weird costumes. Yeah, maybe he should also be surprised that apparently the summoning can work across dimensions 

Family Leave  NR SERIES 

He knows he can leave his kids unsupervised in his house. He's done it before. And sure, he has a lot of unexplained incredibly powerful objects just lying about. But his kids aren't stupid. One of em's even in his twenties. Not to say they aren't dumb. They're definitely dumb. They're just not stupid. They'll be able to handle themselves.... ? Nevermind. He's not leaving the house unless the dimensions are colliding. Fuck Gotham, fuck Batman, and fuck the League. No way. Shit. It's mandatory. 

There's Ghosts Haunting The House Of Mystery  T 1,792 

Constantine has an unexpected guest show up to the House of Mystery, funny thing is, he can't find them! Now if only the three suspicious looking ghosts in his living room knew where their guest mysteriously ran off to... 

Constantine's Tournament  G 2,582 

John Constantine is far from the first person to try to worm his way out of consequences by selling his soul to multiple entities. Too bad he doesn't figure that out until he sells his soul to a random teenager. 

The Peacock Chronicles  T 5,418 SERIES 

John Constantine needs help closing up a Lazarus Pit in Gotham. Danny Phantom can close up Lazarus Pits. This should be a perfectly straightforward arrangement between two people with the same interests in mind- unfortunately, Danny's intentions end up just a tad lost in translation. Constantine should've known doing a favour for a guy like Batman would be a mistake. 

Good Ol' Uncle John And His Ghost Nieces And Nephews  G 3,176 SERIES 

John Constantine is Uncle to 4 kids, maybe more. He just wants a smoke and a drink. They just keep causing Chaos. Once they sent the house to the Ghost Realms. That made him late for work. Not fun. 

Amity In The Ghost Zone  T 

What if Amity Park got stuck in the ghost zone after it was teleported? The city doesn't return on its own after Pariah Dark is defeated. Without knowing how to get the whole city back to the living world, Danny tries to evacuate the residents but most Amity Parkers don't really want to leave. Some people do, but many decide to stay. After all, Amity Park is their home, and the idea of having to start over somewhere new isn't very appealing. So the town, for the most part, continues on like normal. In the words of the great philosopher Dr. Ian Malcom "Life, uh, finds a way." 

Of Gravestones And Names  NR 4,862 

John Constantine didn’t know how he ended up as a father of two eldritch abominations but here he is making Mac n’ Cheese for the two horrors. 

Like A Lamb  G 1,376 

John Constantine would never call himself a kind man, much less a good man, but the kid at the corner table of this fast food restaurant was making him want to be both. Not that John’s kindness would really help the kid, in the long run. 

Daniel Wayne - Escape From Fenton: The Infinite Realms  NR 1,720 SERIES 

John Constantine hates scientist, especially ones who cut the fabric of reality to open the a gateway to the Infinite Realms. He also doesn't like the government. And he barely puts up with the Justice League. 

Debts Always Come Due (And Sometimes That's A Good Thing)  M 

After years of playing off one demon against another so that, even with selling his soul multiple times, none can actually claim it, John Constantine finds out that one of his ancestors royally screwed him over and his soul is now the property of the Ghost King. But things don't go QUITE how he expects. 

A Little Accidental Adoption Never Hurt Anyone! Right?  T 

After Constantine meets the supposed High King of the Infinite Realms, they make a deal. It helps them both out, but neither seems to realize it's not just a deal anymore...well except Clockwork, but he's leaving them be for now. Or Constantine accidentally adopts Danny but doesn't realize it anytime soon. 

I Just Wanna Talk  G 

Danny is the inter-dimensional personification of the IRS for Death and the Unliving, and he just has a couple questions. 

Contractual Obligations  T 114,383 

Danny is doing his kingly duties when a demon breaks into a meeting demanding the king’s soul. Now Danny has only a few months to find his birth father and nullify this soul contract or else he becomes a slave to the demon on his 16th birthday. 

The Family  T 

The death of a necromancer caused some of his more sentient belongings to go berserk and the JL is called to clean up. They unearth an ancient scroll from the magician's residence and Justice League Dark is called into investigate. But why does it look like they want to move to the other side of the galaxy? 

Constantine, John  T 1,545 SERIES 

Danny muses on the enigma that is John Constantine and his relationship with the man. 

Who's Helping Who?  NR 4,815 SERIES 

Concerned about rising signs of villains co-conspiring to create a hefty summoning spell, Batman and select members of the Justice League decide to gather information with a summoning of their own. Danny Phantom's been missing from Amity for weeks. His friends have been scouring beneath the surface of the infamous GIW, but any traces of Phantom have been buried deep. Too deep for them to follow. But when Danny feels the pull of an otherworldly force powerful enough to summon him through his binds and chains, he holds out hope for something better on the other side. 

If You Give A Bat A Burger  T SERIES 

Strange things are going on in Gotham: A series of crimes linked only by a sentence uttered. A drug that no one seems to be selling, but lots of people are taking. An old enemy reborn, or someone pretending to be him. Graffiti that can't be photographed by normal means. Bartenders disappearing without a trace. John Constantine is also there. Danny wants nothing to do with any of it. He just wants to sell burgers and survive. Actually, he'd like to go home again, but since that isn't possible, he'll stick with burgers. Gotham's vigilante's have other plans. This is why Danny doesn't do favors. 

Mentory Stable  G 1,162  

Constantine thinks that Danny Phantom should stay in Amity Park. The Justice League thinks that they should be allowed to help. One person gets the last word. 

Dressed For Death  T 

The list of people John Constantine feels bad for is relatively small. The amount of people who feel bad for Phantom is probably smaller. 

WELL, Isn't This A Bitch Of An Unsatisfactory Situation.  M 6,917 

When Danny had been asked where he went when he wasn't hero-ing, he had pointed at the Well. He'd been thinking of a place for a quick ecto-blob ghost snack; he hadn't realized Amity Park would believe that he was murdered and dumped there. He hadn't expected they would try to protect it from the GIW. Hadn't expected the local police to show up to investigate. And he knew he was in deep shit when it turned out that yes, there was a body down that well. Lots of bodies, in fact. Entire families worth. There's a serial killer loose in Amity Park, and if Danny wants to get the stupid out-of-towner heroes off his back and save Vlad, ew, then he needs to figure it out quick. 

Minor Miscommunication Makes Danny A Happy Halfa T 1,525

Danny likes keeping Amity Park to himself. The Justice League can bother some other ghost and leave his city alone. But alas, Batman comes with the dreaded words and apparently he's the Ghost Ambassador and not the King? Oh he might have some fun with this!

[fanfic-obsessed]

I have a prompt for you, in light of the recent (very entertaining) DCU aus you've posted. If you were going to do a batfam-are-cryptids-but-now-the-justice-leauge-meets-them thing, how would you do it?

Have I told you thank you yet, @somestorythoughts, your prompts and responses make me so happy. Also I almost always end up with  more to write, which is fun.

Now back to the important part.

Fair warning, I screw with ages and timelines with this one. There is no canon here

I think, as far as a cryptid status is concerned this will be a ‘Batman is a founding, and funding, member of the Justice League, but has never revealed his identity’ kind of idea (with all the precautions therein to make sure even the metas can’t guess his identity). There is some speculation throughout the Justice League that Batman does not actually have a civilian identity, that he is the spirit of justice possessing a cape and cowl (Seriously there were three attempted exorcisms).  It is known that Batman always works alone, and that no one is to set foot Gotham, a few of the youngest members disbelieve that Gotham even really exists. 

However there are always rumors that can’t quite be dispelled.  No one in the Justice League can figure out the Watchtower’s firewall (designed by Oracle). Through the years there have been half heard conversations by the JL that almost sound like a wellness check after a fight, going either direction over a com line they can’t access. Sometimes during particularly difficult fights masked strangers will appear, most of which fight with styles similar to Batman, only to vanish again without a word. A few swear they have caught code names (Robin…or maybe Red Robin…Or was it Red Hood…no it was really Black Bat…there might be a BatGirl????) but no one can confirm anything.

In addition, it is impossible to quell the rumor that entering Gotham uninvited means you will disappear.  Not every time and no one can figure out the difference between being escorted out and vanishing, but there have been several heroes from the community who vanished after entering Gotham over the years.

What’s really happening is that I love the Young Justice Team and want a way for it to work with Cryptid BatFam. 

Two of the most notable, the first but certainly not the last, were Bart Allen, Impulse, and Cassie Sandsmark, Wonder Girl who entered the city limits together to try to prove that they too could be heroes. Both were 15 when they vanished.  Unknown to anyone else, at the same time an unnamed clone of Clark Kent and Lex Luthor was also sent into Gotham, as a test of some kind. 

All three of them, for different reasons, entered feeling abandoned or dismissed by the people around them. So when they encountered Tim Drake, as Robin, age 14; he called dibs and adopted them on the spot (Tim: These are my children Cassie, Bart, and the newly named Connor. Yes, I carried them in my very own womb and I am very proud of all of them. No, I will not accept questions. Batkids: Cool! Niblings. Batman<sighs>: At least tell me you didn’t kill someone to acquire them. Tim: I just told you, I birthed them myself).  So Cassie, Bart, and Connor are absorbed into the BatFam. Both Bart and Cassie decide against telling anyone where they are, with Connor not really having anyone to tell.  It should also be noted that the JL avoided asking Batman about the whereabouts of the kids who vanished after entering Gotham, they didn’t want to admit where the kids had gone. 

Three years later, Jason, as Red Hood (Jason did not die here, though it was close. He still took on the moniker of Red Hood after a beating by the Joker), age 19 happens upon Roy Harper, age 20 after Roy had a fight with Oliver and does the same thing. Only Jason dragged Roy home and introduced Roy home as his newest brother, giving Bruce a crazy look that said under no uncertain terms that Bruce better break out the adoption papers immediately; never mind that Roy was not underage.  

At the same time Raven, originally 26, was de aged to about 8 due to an attempted possession by her father, accidentally portals into Gotham and practically climbs Dick Grayson,age 22, in fear. The effects of the spell and the portal wiped her memories past her physical age.  So now Dick has a daughter as well, who he thinks is a Gothamite since he never saw the portal.  As far as anyone from Justice League Dark can tell there was a portal leading to Gotham where Raven disappeared but no one knows what happened (Batman and his family are looking for an adult Raven and never connected her to the 8 year old Rachel that became Dick’s daughter).

Others also disappear, having been adopted by the Waynes

What I am saying is that Gotham is considered quite a bit more dangerous to the caped community and the Batfam encompasses a few people it might not have otherwise. I think it would be funnier if Batman was not aware of his family's cryptid status (It never occurs to him that his kids have never been invited to join any of the younger generation teams).

Something sparks a partial return of Raven’s, now around 14 or 15, memory, enough for Rachel (who is the current Robin) to realize she is Raven. At her request, Batman announces this at a meeting and her intention to remain Dick’s daughter and Bruce’s granddaughter.  The JL react confusingly (they are all losing their collective minds at the thought that Batman has kids AND grandkids).  His response that one of his sons made him a grandfather when the boy was 14 does not inspire confidence.  Eventually, and I do mean this takes ages, it leads to the entire Batfam coming up to the Watchtower.  In spite of the masks Barry recognizes Bart, and after a moment the Wonder’s also recognize Cassie. Both had been desperately missed (the feelings of abandonment had been a misunderstanding).  Though the Wonder’s and the Speedsters both try to hug their missing members, it becomes clear that you can pry them from their mother, Tim, introduced as Red Robin, only when Red Robin is dead. 

The Speedsters look at each other, shrug, and immediately start lobbying Red Robin for Visitation (it does not matter that Tim’s kids are all adults with their own lives in Gotham). The Wonders do not have a chance to do the same as Connor, code name Agent C (he decided he did not want to be a field Vigilante, instead he has taken on a support role, like Alfred, where he is their Mechanic/Mechanical Engineer), drops the bomb that he is a Clone of Superman and Lex Luthor (Connor had not been told enough by the scientists at CADMUS to know what was going on, or even if Lex was aware his DNA was being used but of course the Bats did a DNA, he didn’t even know what the lab was called or where to find it).

Superman does make the connection to CADMUS labs, which he had shut down a few years earlier-though he never put those reports in the Watchtower computers as he considered it an internal matter (Batman would like it noted that all of the Batfam reports end up in the watchtower computer and is irritated that the other heroes do not do the same). 

Connor had been the only ‘viable’ clone but all the records (whether viable or not) had been stamped with ‘failure’, so Superman had not known that there should be a clone of him out there somewhere.  Also the intervening years of being able to process, ‘hey this person I knew, and was once friends with, stole my genetic material to try and create a new person without my consent or knowledge’ without having to deal with the results of said actions (Compounded by the guilt of not being able to look at this miniature version of himself without making the connection to his enemy Lex and his violation, knowing intellectually that it was not Connors fault for being created or that Connor was created specifically to be a weapon against Superman, but still not able move on emotionally, not enough to be responsible for a child) added to the fact that it is pretty clear that Superman does not need to be responsible for Connor means that superman can verify that Connor is happy where he is, which he is. Then Superman can, with a clear conscience-since Batman is undeniably paranoid enough to have a plan if Connor becomes a villain or an actual problem, offer to help with unexpected powers and have Connor meet the rest of his family. 

So Red Robin is simultaneously mediating the reunion between his three children and their other families, all the while ready to take down a Cape that breathes wrong in their direction. 

Red Hood, sans helmet but with a mask, is creatively and rhythmically cursing Green Arrow out on behalf of Roy (I want you to picture a Red Hood that practices and excels in the art of Flyting).  Green Arrow had made an immediate, and poorly phrased, inquiry into Roy sobriety.  Roy has been sober for almost 3 years. 

Damian, codename Firebird, is critiquing several of the last major fights and their fighters while having a discussion about blades and underwater fighting with the Aqua family.  He is also keeping a protective eye on Nightwing and Robin, who are facing off against JLD (who would like to see if what happened to Raven is reversible-mostly to make sure she is healthy and whatever happened is stable, Nightwing and Robin are taking it to mean they want Raven back instead of Robin). 

Steph as Spoiler, Cass as Black Bat, and Duke as Orphan are explaining to a largely horrified audience of former Titans the complicated legacy of the Batman, Robin, and Batgirl names in Gotham (The current Batgirl, Helen Wayne-12 year old daughter of Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne- is standing with Bruce and Alfred-mask firmly in place. She is new to the name and this is her first mission outside of Gotham). It is at this point that the Justice League finds out that there are a number of times when the Batman they dealt with was NOT the same person. Someone also brings up the rumor that Batman is actually a haunted piece of clothing, to the entire BatFams bemusement.

At no point during this process does anyone in the Batfam reveal their civilian identities (save the ones that are now known, like Bart, Cassie, and Roy).  They also do not admit to the fact that every single one of them steals and impersonates each other frequently (Tim holds the honor of having patrolled, handled an Arkham breakout, and met with someone outside of Gotham, and handled a world wide invasion in every vigilante identity from Gotham successfully).  

It also should be noted that this does not provide clarity to the Justice League about any topic regarding Gotham or its vigilantes.

[radiance1]

Remember that post where Danny was a dragon and Vlad was a pheonix?

Yea, they're thought here too.

And Danny is obvi an eastern dragon.

Also kinda inspired by the Kwami from mlb.

Danny became the prince of the Far Frozen, after having been adopted by Frostbite a few centuries earlier. Danny is immortal here, and lived past his family so he just spends most of his time in the Far Frozen now.

Vlad meanwhile just stuck to his own lair, a great zone of fire filled with his signature black flames. Occasionally he goes out to the human world to check in on Vladco, he unfortunately had to leave his business up to an heir since it would draw a great amount of suspicion if he were to still be the head after, say, a hundred or so years.

Did he have a child with someone? Hah! No, he just took an orphan off the street, cleaned them up a lil, and turned them into an heir worthy of Vladco.

Vlad and Danny aren't exactly friends, nor enemies either. The most accurate term would be that they're Frenemies. After a few hundred years they've just resorted to that.

Vlad is an enemy of Prince Aragon, surprisingly he didn't actually do anything significant to earn his ire, Prince Aragon just hates him because he's a phoenix.

Danny is also enemies with him, since he was one of Danny's enemies before when he was a teen and the guy's attitude didn't at all help in making Danny not be his enemy really.

So you can say they bonded over their shared hatred for that one guy a little bit.

Cute forward a couple years into the future and Danny and Vlad have gotten trapped inside some magical artifacts.

Why?

Because some wizard wanted their power for his own gain and such made a plan to pit them against each other, make them tire themselves out and injure the other, and then turn them into artifacts.

Danny got transformed into a necklace and Vlad got transformed into a ring.

In hindsight, they should've seen this coming.

Like the Kwami's from mlb they can come out of their respective items in a chibi form. Tiny eastern dragon and tiny phoenix that gave the wizard who turned them into what they are now hell.

They were sassy, straight out insulted him and laughed to each other about it straight to his face, and when the situation allowed it. Hindered him instead of helping him.

It got so bad that the wizard who turned them into jewelry decided to just give them off instead of holding onto them.

They've been given away, sold, auctioned off. A lot of things, though after being handed off from the wizard they were mostly silent. Over the years they were unfortunately split up, going to different owners.

Fast forward to another couple more years and Danny found himself dug up from a casket belonging to a long dead wizard and then just dumped into the custody of one Timothy Drake.

Meanwhile, Vlad found himself bought Lex Luthor, then he went: "Wait a minute, something about you is familiar.." then found out he was the descendant of that one orphan kid he took off the streets.

Danny appeared to Tim because he was lonely, and basically became his best friend. Though he was confused about his apparent obsession with this Batman character.

Vlad also appeared to Lex Luthor, though he did haggle him quite a bit for his business and what did you mean that kid's descendants ran his business into the ground? He taught that kid everything he knew and his descendants had the gall to run his business into bankruptcy just because he wasn't around?

If he got his claws on them he swore he would-

Anywho, who the hell is Superman and why do you hate him?

[haveihitanerve]

Heyoo school just ended and I got an idea 🔥

Bruce in a meeting with WE executives (before Tim becomes CEO) and no matter what he's talking about, he's somehow interrupted by one of his kids and/or one of his superfriends.

They're only doing this because it's his birthday and he somehow forgot.

Lex hated meeting with the Wayne corporation. Not only did very little good ever come of them, the deals he wanted to seal never happened and it only ended with Wayne himself insulting Lex's very existence, but they were rarely ever alone, as Wayne had apparently taken his charity way of life to heart, and adopted more than just the one orphan or street kid. Not to mention his friends.

Needless to say, Lex was not feeling high spirits when he was escorted up into Wayne's meeting board office. "Luthor," Bruce plastered on a massive smile, so forced it looked painful, but it was all a part of their game, reaching out to clasp his hand. "It's been too long." Lex laughed along, squeezing back just as tightly.

"And somehow not long enough." he answered with equal cheer, and Wayne laughed, gesturing him to a seat as he poured them both something to drink. Something they agreed on, for once, in order to get through these meetings, they needed alcohol.

"I know the interruptions that befall us do annoy you," Bruce began apologetically, and Lex braced himself. "So I have cleared my day. Only the two of us this time." His smile seemed to lose a bit of its insincerity. "I promise." Lex nodded back crisply in thanks, not believing him for a second.

But... as time wore on and... and Lex actually got one of his deals, and there were no interruptions... it was. It was a trap. He just knew it. There was no way- and then it happened.

Glass exploded around them and Lex ducked, looking around wildly, only to find the Wayne Enterprises heir, Tim Drake, slurping a slushie, looking bored. Bruce hadn't even moved from his chair, staring at his son. "I specifically said no interruptions." He said gruffly. Drake shrugged.

"Sorry." He returned, not sounding sorry at all. "Just wanted to drop this off." he plopped a brightly, poorly, wrapped lumpy shaped thing, saluted Lex with his middle finger and dropped back out the window. Lex didn't even bother to comment on it. Crazier stuff had happened in a Wayne meeting than just windows breaking.

Bruce sighed, sweeping away the shards of glass with his foot, and asked his secretary to please get new glass installed, then turned to Lex. "Apologies Luthor, I truly asked for no-" Lex jumped back, cowering behind the couch. Superman, his Superman, was hovering the in hole in the window. Bruce frowned but turned, frown deepening when he saw the hero.

"Yes?" His voice was unkind at the least, downright cold at most. Superman raised an eyebrow, extending a marginally less bright, better wrapped package.

"Just dropping this off." He murmured, eyes darting to Lex and back again. "See you around Mr. Wayne." The super glared once more at Lex before turning and flying off.

Bruce sighed, plopping this box down next to the lumpy one, and gestured Lex to take a seat again. Before he could, two shadows dropped from the ceiling. One black, shadow color, the other purple.

"Delivery!" The purple one chirped, far too cheery for an eight am meeting. Bruce was downright glowering by now, but the two demons didn't seem to mind, shoving two extra packages under his arms, one large and clunky and obnoxiously purple and glittery, the other small and simple and well wrapped.

Bruce dipped his head to both of them and they high fived, jumping back into the vents like nothing had happened. Bruce hefted the larger package onto his shoulder, setting it against the wall, and let the little one on his desk.

"Quite uh, the collection of packages today. And delivery services." Lex chuckled nervously. Bruce was eyeing the packages with narrow eyed suspicion, but nodded, finally returning to his seat. "Yes.."

They managed another five blissful minutes of uninterrupted work, until the door slammed open and the man Lex recognized as Bruce's first charity case, Dick Grayson, strolled in, streamers draped around his shoulders like a scarf, wheeling in a girl in a wheelchair, who had another collection of bright packages on her lap.

"What is this?" Bruce finally asked in frustration, standing. Dick blinked at him, as well as the six other children and thirteen adults that trailed him, each also holding either packages or food. (Dick, Babs,- Tim, Jason, Damian, Duke, Steph, Cass- adults: Clark, Lois, Diana, Hal, Barry, Victor, Arthur, Selina, Ivy, Harley, Alfred, Leslie, and Luke Fox)

"B, tell me you didn't forget." laughed one of the older kids, holding a T-shirt cannon that was dangerously aimed at Luthor's head. Bruce's brow furrowed as he looked between them all. "What?"

The kid laughed again, firing the cannon right at Wayne's stomach, Bruce easily catching it, and dropped the gun. "Its your birthday, old man."

[suzukiblu]

“Technically Young Justice is a situationship more than a superhero team these days, but they are just not gonna be explaining that to the Justice League” is soooo funny. How do you explain to the adult superheroes responsible for you that you trauma bonded so hard you’re in polyam relationship now. Being glued at the hip is not enough, you all need to crawl inside each other’s skin

lol I was pretty proud of that line, ngl. ❤️

They don't explain. They never explain. One day the Justice League just randomly finds out they're all technically listed as emergency-contact grandparents to an entire swarm of Core Four children and they're like "wait what when and how and WHO?!?!"

Answers range from: oh Kon's stepkid from Gemworld moved in because Earth has good school districts, Bart kinda accidentally picked up some adorable little orphans from the thirtieth century, Tim was forcibly adopted by a gang of feral Gotham street kids, Cassie took a ceramics class and the gods did NOT understand that she wasn't ACTUALLY trying to make herself an actual Wonderbaby, Cissie just kinda didn't want this kid she accidentally had when she got off-schedule with her birth control during the last apocalypse so she just gave it to them, they all found out Thad reproduced and had a superhero-CPS intervention before he could dump the kiddo in a VR chamber . . . you know, all the traditional methods.

. . . what do you MEAN Lex Luthor reopened Cadmus and--GODDAMMIT LEX THEY DON'T HAVE A BIG ENOUGH HOUSE FOR ALL THESE BABY DOOMSDAYS AND TINY KON 2.0s, WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS, YOU DIDN'T ACTUALLY HAVE TO CUSTOM-BUILD YOUR OWN DAMN GRANDBABIES.

Tim, stay away from the damn cloning chambers. TIM. TIM DRAKE YOU GET YOUR CAPED ASS BACK HERE.

Also at some point Krypto had puppies. Probably Krypton!Krypto AND Earth!Krypto had puppies, possibly together but it's unclear. No one is sure how it happened and frankly at this point they're afraid to ask.

. . . oh god they can ALL fly, why can they ALL fly, DAMMIT KON--

[cardcaptorsakura96]

Finding Each Other-Chapter 1

Fandom: Superman, Batman, Shazam, and Wonder Woman

Characters: Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Lois Lane, Dick Grayson, Diana Prince, Billy Batson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Kara Zor El, Damian Wayne, Cassandra Cain, Alfred Pennyworth, Lex Luthor, Jonathan Kent, Connor Kent

Summary: Clark Kent always knew he wanted a family. He just always thought it would be traditional like his parents. Little did he know that destiny had something different in store for him.

When Clark was growing up, society had a way of strongly instilling in him that a nuclear family was the norm. A mother, a father, a son, and a daughter. There were examples of it in every TV show he watched, and every book and magazine he read.

However, that all changed when his parents dropped a bombshell on him when he was twelve. The first of his many powers, heat vision, came in. Needless to say, he was scared shitless especially since he burned multiple holes into his room while screaming like a maniac. It was at that point his parents revealed the truth that they didn’t just adopt him. They found him in a spaceship that had crashed into their barn. When his parents showed it to him, he couldn’t believe it. He stared at the ship for a while before touching it and when he did, it instantly brought out a hologram of his biological dad explaining that he was the last son of a dying planet. Clark soon became overwhelmed and a new power emerged, super speed, that helped him run away to cool his head in Antarctica of all places. 

Soon he started to figure out other things about himself. While he found women attractive, he felt the same way about men too. He made that discovery when he saw Morgan Jackson exiting the shower room at school wet. His parents discouraged his powers in public, but he made the exception that day to avoid his fellow peers seeing the bulge that had started to form in his pants. At that point, he started to realize that he was not the norm. As he got older, he began to wonder, what is the norm? That question came up more and more after he entered college. What was normal in his conservative small town was vastly different from the outside world. The nuclear family doesn’t have to be a man and woman having 2.5 children. It can be two males having a child, or two females having a child. A single person can have a child by themselves. Hell, you don’t have to have children to become a family. Being blood doesn’t always make you a family. Sometimes people find others who share the same goals as they do and make their own families. Clark always wondered what type of family he would have. He always admired his family's upbringing, but often wondered if destiny had something else different in store for him. Little did he know, he would start on his journey to familyhood a couple of days before his 24th birthday.

Clark was just about to go to bed for the night after patrolling Metropolis when he received a call from Lois asking him to come over. She said she was fine, but it was 3 am when she called. He had known her for four years and she had never called that late. Clark quickly changed back into his super suit and went to her apartment. He landed on her balcony like he had thousands of times before. She was one of the few people who wasn’t instantly fooled by the glasses and plaid shirts. Lois had figured out Clark's identity the second day they met. However, she kept it a secret and they have been best friends ever since. When Clark came in through the balcony of her apartment, he spotted Lois in the living room pacing back and forth. 

Clark frowned and said, “Is everything alright Lois?”

Lois looked up startled at Clark and said, “Oh, Clark. I didn’t realize that you arrived already.”

Clark looked at her hesitantly and said, “Well, you did ask me to come over. You sounded kind of off over the phone. Did something happen?”

Lois looked at him hesitantly for a moment before looking downward and twiddling her thumbs.

Clark went up to Lois and gently took her hand to lead both of them to the couch to sit down. 

Clark then turned to her and said, “You know Lois, you can tell me anything. I promise not to judge no matter what it is.”

Lois looked at him with weariness in her eyes and sighed.

“I found out some upsetting news about my family history.”

Clark frowned and said, “What?”

“Lucy and I always avoided my mom’s side of the family. Our dad went no contact with them after our mom died when I was four. We got back in contact with them when we found out my sister was sick this year.”

“You mean when Lucy found out she had stage II ovarian cancer?” asked Clark.

Lois nodded and said, “Yes. We knew that cancer was not common on our Dad’s side, but her doctor recommended Lucy find out our mother’s side because the particular strain of cancer that Lucy had seemed more aggressive than usual. She was able to beat it for now but after many surgeries though. We decided to talk to our maternal grandfather who informed us all the women in his family had gotten cancer. The women in the family die from it before the age of 40.”

Lois had tears started flowing down her face. 

Clark instantly embraced her and started rubbing soothing circles around her back. 

“I am so sorry to hear that,” said Clark softly.

Lois sniffed while pushing back from Clark and said, “Lucy is pissed and has been directing her anger at our father. If he had let us interact with our mom’s side sooner, we would have been better prepared. My dad wants me to talk to her to calm her down, but I can’t blame her for being angry though.”

Clark noticed that she avoided details and asked, “Did you get yourself tested?”

Lois nodded while sniffling and said, “I did. I have tested clean so far. However, I am going to have to be tested every couple of months for it.”

Clark looked started and asked, “Every couple of months?”

Lois nodded and said, “The cancer that the women in my family typically get is fast-acting, and they usually don’t find out until the cancer has reached its final stages. Lucy was lucky in a sense that she found out sooner than normal because she was injured during the line of duty and they found the cancer during their thorough examination of her.” Lois sighed while rubbing the back of her neck and said, “And this isn’t even half of it.”

Clark raised his eyebrow and asked, “Did something else happen?”

Lois leaned back in her chair and said, “While they did my examination, they did notice that my egg count was extremely low for my age.”

Clark frowned and asked, “What does that mean?”

Lois sighed and said, “The doctor said that if she had just looked at the test results without seeing me, she would have thought I was a woman in my mid-50s about to go through menopause.”

“Oh,” said Clark softly.

Lois wiped a tear that had started to trickle down her face and said, “It really sucks to know that your body is turning against you.”

Clark gave a soft smile while rubbing Lois’ back and said, “I am so sorry Lois.”

Lois smiled meekly and said, “I know it could be worse. It is just the news had made me reevaluate my life plans and goals and now I have to rearrange things that I was going to do way later.”

Clark raised an eyebrow and asked, “Like what?”

Lois looked at him nervously and said, “Remember how we said that if we didn’t find anyone by the time we were 40, we would have a child together.”

“Yes,” asked Clark warily. 

Lois chuckled nervously and said, “What would you think of doing it now?”

Read the rest on AO3

[animeredhead101]

Bruce Wayne / Danny Fenton Masterlist

Complete

Bask in Our Cosmic Insignificance by DisillusionedDanny :

After Lady Gotham sends a lost and alone King Phantom to check on a little boy Danny Fenton finds himself the new guardian "angel" of a six year old boy. Tim Drake. Word Count: 33,632

Of loss, longing and long duration. by Olive_of_Vanders :

Danny and Bruce were once in love, yet like all things it came to an end.

... So why are the Wayne kids still visiting him?

Word Count: 5,211

The Story of Us by DisillusionedDanny :

Danny Fenton and Bruce Wayne have been best friends since they were children. Of course, sometimes friendships fizzle out without anyone meaning for it to happen. People grow up, they change, they become Batman. Thankfully, Fate has a way of bringing people back together. When the Supers are poisoned by Lex Luthor with no treatment in sight, John Constantine suggests that they summon the strongest healer in the Infinite Realms to see if they can possibly heal the supers. For the first time in twenty years, Bruce Wayne finds himself face-to-face with Danny Fenton once more. Only now, his dorky childhood best friend is a lot more attractive than he remembers. Word Count: 33,030

Sweet Dreams (Are Made of These) by DisillusionedDanny for Olive_of_Vanders :

Danny Fenton has realized that his husband has a bit of an adoption problem. His only rule? No kid vigilantes.

Word Count: 3,712

The Prettiest Star by DisillusionedDanny :

After meeting the Ghost King for the first time, Bruce Wayne falls irrevocably in love. Next thing he knows, they're married and he has to introduce his immortal husband to his kids and pseudo adoptive father. Danny is just happy to be a part of a family again. Two hundred years of being alone is a long time. But now, he has nine little stars that will bring him love and companionship. He's also excited to get to be the cool step dad to a bunch of vigilantes. Word Count: 23,724

On-going

Of Ghosts and Bindings by MarshmallowBun :

Bruce gets knocked out as he is leaving a fundraiser, he wakes up tied down in a summoning circle. Next thing he knows there is a green portal being ripped into reality above him as a beautiful starry mist begins to leak out and form into a humanoid shape. Bruce cant help but think how beautiful this creature looks. Word Count: 21,872

Bird Buddies by MarshmallowBun :

Danny works at the Watchtower as a Technician/Mechanic, although being scouted out specifically by the Big Black Bat himself seems to make it hard for him to get along with his higher ups apparently.

Along the way danny gets a traffic light colored duckling that follows him around every-once-in-a-while.

Reposted from my Tumblr @minnesota-fats

Word Count: 33,071

Reunion of the Decade by Phantomworks :

"The bat kids meet Danny while they spy on the 'Bruce's Exes annual reunion'. Normally, they wouldn't notice him but is not any time that you see someone fistfight Talia Al Ghul" Word Count: 4,257

Phantoms and Foes by Zylev :

Krypton was dying long before it exploded. After a lab accident at 14 gave Danny ice powers, he used them for good to try and stop crime as the first hero of Krypton. But when thousands of years of mining the core of Krypton finally caught up to the planet, General Zod evacuated Krypton to the Phantom Zone before it exploded. Little did Zod know he led the Kryptonians to a slaughter. Years later, Danny is the only Kryptonian left alive when Kal-El finds the Phantom Projector and brings him to Earth. Danny must now adjust to having new powers and life on a planet that is completely different than Krypton and the Phantom Zone.

Word Count: 121,723

[somefanficrecomendations]

December Monthly Roundup

Here's December's fic round up!

DC/BATMAN

Worlds Saddest Breakfast Club by motleyfam   (gen)7k, Hurt/Comfort, Jason Todd-Centric Following a couple of Very Bad Weeks™ (which may or may not have involved being kidnapped and mildly tortured), Jason decides the best way to cheer himself up is to break into the Manor for a 3 a.m. snack. Turns out he isn’t the only one awake.

Batstream by RandomReader13 (gen), 6k, Bats on social media, Humor   “I want it on record that I think this is a terrible idea and I’m only doing this to mitigate the damage." AKA Red Robin decides it's a great idea to livestream patrol while Batman's off-world. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

cards on the table by wesslan (gen) 67k, WIP, Fortune Teller AU, Tim Drake-Centric  Tim's parents faked their deaths and fled the country years ago, but neglected to take him with them. He spent some time on the streets, and now at 16, he makes a living as a fortune teller, stalking and hustling the shit out of Gotham's elite by telling them eerily accurate fortunes based on the information he gathers about them.  His life is peculiar but he wouldn't change a thing. When he gets booked for the big Wayne Halloween party, however, he finds himself getting all tangled up with the Waynes, and the more fortunes he tells, the tighter the snare becomes.  or: Tim just wanted to scam Gotham's elite, not end up on the Batfamily's watchlist. But it seems they just won't leave him alone..

(a not so) lonesome town by wesslan   (gen), 10k, 2-part series, Sentient Gotham, Jazz music. Two works in which Gotham City is sentient and adopts enough kids to rival Batman himself (Batman is one of them).

Banshee in a Well by liverobinreaction (bugbee) (gen), 43k, Meta Tim, Resurrection Powers   Tim is five years old when he drowns in his parents' pool. He dies quietly, waiting for parents who love him, but will never be there, to realise that something is wrong. They never show up, and he sinks into oblivion.  When he wakes up and claws his way out of the water, the sun has set, and the lights of his house are on. He is cold and wet and his lungs burn.  But most of all, Tim is alone.  (If you die and no-one is there to see it, were you ever alive in the first place?)

HUNGER GAMES

right here in the old therebefore by californianNostalgia (Katniss/Peeta) 14k, Canon Divergence, Ghosts There’s a ghost at the Hanging Tree. Katniss sees him first when she’s six, her hair in braids, the song about the growing gallows fresh in her mind. This changes nothing. This changes some things. (In which Lucy Gray killed Coriolanus at the lake.)

How Rue Became the Mockingjay by aimmyarrowshigh (multi) 5k, Different 74th Victors AU Katniss Everdeen and the girl from Eleven are ruining their best-laid plans – the Capitol’s and the Rebels’. So Caesar, they say. Announce the change. An alternate chronology for The Hunger Games.

CROSSOVERS

Annabeth and the Nine Step Career Plan by feeling_the_aster_9145 (Annabeth/Percy), 76k, PJO x DCU, Annabeth gets Lex Luthor arrested, BAMF Annabeth. Annabeth Chase does not accept limitations. Everyone knows that. If she wants something, no matter how impossible, she will find a way to make it happen. Though, perhaps she will allow Bruce Wayne and his ridiculous paranoia-induced company restrictions a small portion of the credit. Actually… now that she thinks about it, the man may have had a point in his worries. Wayne Technologies does not accept college interns. Annabeth always has a plan B.

A Lesson in Superiority by Nation-Ustria (gen), 96k, WIP, Batfam x Harry Potter, Damian Wayne is Harry Potter, Wizarding Politics “The good news is, he’s not cursed,” Constantine says. “And the bad news?” Dick asks sharply. Constantine squints. “I wouldn’t call it bad news so much as, er, news.” He turns to Damian with something like a grimace. “You’re a wizard, kid.” “...I’m a what?”

[gothamnewsnetwork-official]

The right of passage for the elite; Bruce Wayne

Bruce Wayne has once again admitted to a famous former fling, who’s up this time on the chopping block? None other than Metropolis’s own Lex Luther (see related articles).

Mr. Wayne ( @officialbruciewayne ) (see related articles) admitted to the ordeal earlier this month (see post here) while replying to another post of his on his less-than-conventional family (and extended family) (see related articles).

Our city’s resident billionaire and notorious playboy stated as follows -

“ My family is a non-traditional one and the balance of who is and isn't my child is not decided based upon which people I have happened to make out with in the anteroom of a semi-public bathroom. I hope this helps. ”

This came in a post as a response to what we can only assume to be the criticisms of Mr. Wayne’s son, Tim Drake-Wayne’s ( @timblrdrake ) (see related articles), relationship with Bernard Dowd ( @officialbernarddowd ) (see related articles) and Astra Hal-El ( @totally-not-soupernova ).

Many have taken to criticizing Mr. Drake-Wayne, along with his two partners, for committing and being complacent in step-cest. Astra Hal-El is the daughter of Clark Kent, a former fling of Mr. Wayne’s (see related articles), and, allegedly, Lex Luthor.

This journal would, however, like to state that young Ms. Hal-El and Mr. Drake-Wayne have never been around each other as siblings and that their relationship should in no way be thought about as step-cest given that Mr. Drake-Wayne is adopted, Mr. Wayne is, allegedly, no longer seeing Mr. Kent, and that the relationship between Mr. Wayne and Mr. Luther is nearly two decades in the past; prior to any of the boys being born.

This brings us back to our original story, that of the relationship between Mr. Wayne and Mr. Luther. Mr. Wayne states in a repost of the original statement that his relationship with Mr. Luther happened before he lost his hair (see related articles), an event that happened well over 20 years ago due to Mr. Luther’s struggles with premature hair loss (see related articles), hastened by what we believe to be, allegedly, tension alopecia (see related articles).

Mr. Wayne goes on to state that this entire situation was due to him returning from rural Mongolia (see related articles) and having yet to see Mr. Luther without hair, though we question the validity of this statement given the fact that Mr. Wayne and Mr. Luther allegedly kept in contact during Mr. Wayne’s time in Mongolia.

He states that he deeply regrets his actions and will live with said regret till his dying days.

This, however, did not prevent him from making out with Mr. Luther again, at some unspecified date, in a semi-public washroom.

This combined with the earlier revelations on their first rendezvous leads to this reporter wondering if Mr. Wayne truly regrets his actions or if he is merely saying that he does to save face, given public opinion (see related articles) on Mr. Luther.

Regardless, this reporter finds it rather fascinating the amount of social elites and celebrities that have been involved with Mr. Wayne (see related articles), though it is in no way surprising given his track record and the fact that fame and money are notorious for causing irrationality and impulsivity in those who possess them.

This is certainly not the first ‘secret fling’ of Mr. Wayne’s to be exposed and we do not, in any way, expect it to be the last.

Let us know your thoughts on this topic (here)

Gotham Reports is certified in unbiased, reliable, and fair reporting

Solutions to premature male-pattern balding and hair loss (here)