#lets see if i can actually do this everyday....
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trustmypoison · 2 days ago
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SVT with a partner who is an engineer
Requested? Yes!
Request: ‘Hello can u do svt with s/o that work as engineers??? I'll graduate with diploma in civil engineering soon hehe and I wanna see their reactions like how proud they are with s/o that working in stem industries.’
A/N: This may mention many types of engineering for the sake of capturing a few different examples. Congrats to the requester!
Might be more excited than you to see the success of a project - Seungcheol, Hoshi, DK
For this section, I’m thinking civil, architectural, or software engineering as an example. But he sees you work on something for months in blue prints, drawings, or just a specs list and it doesn’t necessarily feel real to them. Like, they can’t see it, so the vision isn’t there for them yet. But when they start to see it come together or finally see the final product that you’ve spent so much time on, he’s amazed that that just came out of your mind. Like, imagine if you had a hand in a new building and the building is finally standing. He’ll dub it your building and you can’t bring yourself to correct him because it’s cute. 
Loves that you’re an expert in your specialization - Joshua, Wonwoo, Mingyu, Chan
Imagine that you’re an expert in something that you have in your house and you need to call someone in to repair it. He loves watching you tell the tech exactly what the problem is and how to fix it. He also loves letting you haggle the pricing because you know how much the replacement parts really cost. He won’t argue with you if you just want to buy the part and replace it yourself either. (I have lived this my whole life as the child of an engineer, trust me on these things.) And if it’s time to replace something like that, he has the upmost trust in you to shop for it and he’s just handing you the card. 
Has no problem letting you take the reins on projects at home - Jeonghan, Woozi, Seungkwan
I don’t think you can be in this sort of career if you aren’t a planner. There’s a certain strategy to the work that you do everyday and that sort of skill can be used everywhere. So if you guys want to do a project around the house, he totally defers to you to make the plan and he’ll blindly follow instructions. It’s not that they couldn’t do that themselves or hire someone else to do it, but they would put so much trust in your skill that whatever you say goes. 
Amazed that you might travel more than he does - Jun, Minghao, Vernon
It baffles him early in the relationship that you are on the road more than he is sometimes. There can be a lot of travel involved in an engineering career and you will go through long periods of time where you both might as well be in a long-distance relationship. But that’s okay with him. When he calls and gets to talk to you, he’s not super interested in talking about how his things are going. He actually wants to know how your travels are going and if you’re happy with the progress in your project that took you on the road in the first place. 
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ldydeath · 23 hours ago
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But I Love You | Kwon Ji-yong (G-Dragon)
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Summary: Jiyong is struggling through his hiatus and misses his best friend. You try your best to be there for him, even when it feels like he doesn’t want you around.
Warnings: slight angst, a lot of GD yearning for TOP. Very minor language.
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Things hadn’t exactly been easy since Jiyong had decided to take a hiatus. You weren’t really sure if he even knew what a hiatus was. Everyday you’d wake to find him in the studio, writing new material, a stressed look on his face. You’d hoped that a break would’ve actually been just that - but the man didn’t know how to quit. You’d pull him out every night when you could tell he was getting frustrated hoping the next day would be better.
You’d have secret conversations with Youngbae and Daesung whenever you got too worried, knowing deep down that the only person he’d reason with had shut him out. Morning came quickly and you were awoken to Jiyong emerging from his blanket cocoon. “Jiyong, why don’t we just take a rest today?” You tried your best to make your voice sound normal, not a hint of pleading in there but he picked up on it and sighed.
“I can’t today. I really have to finish this song.” He sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes and you took the opportunity to really look at him. The dark circles you thought you’d imagined were real. His skin seemed pale, he looked worn out. “Maybe we can do something tomorrow.” He got out of bed, offered you a smile and headed out of the room.
You couldn’t help the pang of disappointment you felt as he disappeared from the room. You knew Jiyong loved you, of course he did, but you couldn’t help but feel forgotten. You never wanted to come between him and his work, you knew how he got when he felt like he was up against a wall. But something needed to change.
With a heavy sigh, you got out of bed, made yourself presentable and headed out of the house. You unfortunately couldn’t sit around waiting for him today. Work called and even if you’d been willing to call in earlier, that had changed the second Jiyong walked out of the bedroom. You knew you should stay home, save him from himself but you needed a break too. Maybe a without you hovering would help.
When you pulled into the drive that evening everything felt off. The lights were off, the lights were never off - unless you were sleeping. “Jiyong?” You called as you entered the house, closing the front door with a soft thud. You were greeted with silence and the soft meow of your cars. You weren’t going to worry. You weren’t worried. You kept telling yourself that as you wandered the house in search of him. Where the fuck was he?
You paused outside the door to his studio, you’d never gone in there before. Not that you couldn’t, it just was so very him that you didn’t want to disturb his sanctuary. You pressed your ear up to the door but it was useless, the room was so soundproofed you couldn’t hear a thing..
The site that unfolded in front of you hadn’t been what you’d expected. There on the couch in the sound booth was your boyfriend passed out clutching what appeared to be lyrics. So that was why the house was dark, he hadn’t bothered to leave the studio once. You moved the papers out of his hands, careful not to read any of his work and shook him awake.
“Hey” he smiled as his eyes locked with yours. “What are you doing in here?” You moved to sit down next to him and shrugged. “The house was dark. I didn’t know where you were.” He scooted slowly, to sit next to you.
“I’m sorry I worried you, I must’ve passed out. I’ve not been sleeping well.” He admitted. Your head snapped looking over at him, worry etched in your brows. “See, that look right there is why I didn’t tell you. You don’t need to worry about me.” You frowned, reaching a hand out to touch him. “Talk to me. What’s going on with you?” You should’ve asked sooner, but you’d been hoping you were over reacting.
He let out a sigh, shaking his head as he broke eye contact with you. “I keep thinking if I write the right song, the best song, he’ll read it and come back.” You could hear the pain in his voice, and it made you want to protect him from ever feeling this way again. His best friend was doing what he thought was best for everyone - which couldn’t be further from the truth. “I don’t think it’s that simple, oppa.” Seunghyun had been your friend too and you weren’t blind to the void that he left behind. “Seunghyun needs time to heal, he didn’t leave because he wanted to. He left because he felt he had to.” You eyed the sheet holding the lyrics Jiyong has been working on. “Can I read it?”
He nodded and handed the lyrics over. Any other girl might be jealous of such heartfelt feelings being written about someone else but not you. You understand their relationship, he’d come first. They’re more than best friends, they were family and both of them were hurting. “It’s perfect.”
“You’re biased” he smirked, taking the paper back and tucking it into his pocket. “Maybe, but it’s still perfect. You should record it.” He shook his head. “It’s not Bigbang without him.” You offered up a reassuring smile, a playful glint in your eye, “so make it GD.” You hardly ever referred to him as his stage name and he smiled before hiding his face with his hands. There he was. That shy adorable guy you loved so much.
“Maybe.” He yawned, stretching his arms before standing up. “Thank you for this. I should’ve told you sooner.” You shook your head. “Don’t worry about it. Just know you’re not alone, ok?”
He nodded. reaching his arm out to you, helping you to your feet. “I’m sorry if I’ve been acting not myself lately, I just don’t know how to let people in fully. I get in my head and think I have to do it all alone.” He apologized as he led you both out of the studio. Turning on the lights as he went.
“You’re not alone. I’m always going to be here for you. Even if you don’t want to talk about whatever’s going on, I’m still here.” You gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, wishing you could take all his pain away. He pulled you toward him, a small smile on his face. Not his big grin you’d grown to love over the years but it was a start. “I love you. He mumbled before pulling you in for a kiss. “I love you too” you smiled against his lips.
Tag List: @wcnderlnds, @alosss-blog please let me know if you'd like to be tagged!
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snoopyiz · 10 hours ago
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‘ drown to impress ’ feat. LARA RAJ
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─── ﹙🪼﹚ Lara has never even thought about swimming, until she found out you were on the swimming team. Going from just barely waking up to be present in her first period to being up at 6am everyday was a struggle, especially since her body wasn’t used to it. The worst part? She didn’t even know how to swim.
PAIRING(s): lara raj x swimmer!reader, highschool au
WARNING(s): fluff, nearly drowning, mentions of gurgling/spitting, reader does cpr as some point, skin tone mention (nothing derogatory)
A/N: never join a swimming team TRUST me. it’s horrid. also this is lowkey really bad im sorry 💔
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None of Lara’s friends understood. I mean why would she suddenly show interest in swimming of all things? Lara Raj was a woman of many talents, but swimming was not one.
None of them even recall ever seeing her actually swim— staying on the shore at the beach does not count. How did the infamous Lara Raj find herself nearly drowning?
Well it’s simple really. One day as she was walking to class she saw this girl— not just any though. Her beauty was enough to turn heads, or at least in Lara’s mind, because according to her friend, the girl was a ‘two out of ten’. Although Lara’s sure she’s higher, that's beside the point.
Lara had her friend— Daniela do a little digging, it turned out that said girl was on a swim team! Which is how Lara found herself in this position, her ears ringing as she found her vision darkening.
The one familiar thing she sees is you. Was she dying? Or worse, dead already? Maybe diving head first on the first day was something not everyone could achieve, the one thing she did achieve was learning she couldn’t swim though!
You on the other hand were panicking, hastily you pulled her out of the water, shaking her— even if you knew it wouldn’t really help much if she had inhaled too much water. You kneeled next to her, placing your hands on her chest and pressed down a few times, until she gurgled up water. As she spit it out, you helped her turn her body upwards so that she wouldn’t choke on it more.
“Are you okay?” You frantically asked, even if Lara wanted to answer— she quite literally couldn’t. Lara wanted to shrivel up and die there as you continued to ask her questions. She just knew her friends would never let her live this up, especially the fact she could’ve died yet all she could think of was your hand rubbing her back.
Ever since that day you’ve personally made it your mission to teach her how to swim, because come on, who joins a swimming team without even knowing how to tread!
“Lara.. you’re doing it wrong, again.” you sighed, moving beside her and placing your hand on her back.
“you have to relax, or else you’ll never be able to float.” you said for the third time, holding her up on her back within the water. Undoubtedly Lara was gorgeous, but you could tell she wasn’t listening. It was little things she would forget, her towel, to be on time, it made you truly wonder why she was even on the team.
Lara on the other hand felt like she was on cloud nine, five days a week spending time alone with this gorgeous girl? Not only that, but was her coach. The problem arose when finals came. Lara genuinely thought swimming was for fun, not tournaments and all.
“you do know they wanna cut you right?” You told Lara, walking into the locker rooms.
“oh, uhm why?” She questioned, even if she knew the answer.
“Well, for one you can barely tread properly. Second, you're late a lot, not to mention the clothes instead of the swimsuit. Third, you're always distracted.” Oh. Was she that bad? Lara hadn’t noticed how much you’d taken note of her.
“I only joined because—” of you. The words sat on the tip of her tongue, yet she couldn’t bring herself to say them?
“I already know why, I saw your friend come up in my Facebook recommendations and assumed it was because of this.” You admitted, laughing a little at the last part— while you laughed, Lara's face burned, she was sure if she was a different tone you would’ve known.
The only words she could get out were an ‘I’m sorry’, she was beyond embarrassed, I mean hey, at least she could take something away from this she thought— don’t join a club you have absolutely no interest in!
“We should hang out sometime.” You said, looking back at her before grabbing your swimming bag,
“oh also, I left my number on a piece of paper in your bag.” You stated before leaving. Lara was beyond glad nobody was in the locker room with the way she nearly leaped to her bag, searching for the paper— her jaw dropping when she found it, you weren’t lying.
xxx-xxx-xxxx: hi yn it’s lara
yn (aka loml): hi lara !! lmk when ur free and we can link 😁
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lestappencrumblers · 15 hours ago
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YES YES I CAN GO ONN
Like, Lando being this hard serious CEO to all his clients and employees but Oscar always has his soft spot and everyone in the company knows he's off limits, thier friends (Max Carlos Charles ect could be CEOs too, and Lando's buisness partners) all tease them for it.
Oscar had been working with Lando's company since he was in college, starting off as an internship and then going full time after, and Lando's the youngest CEO so together with Oscar's help they built the company legacy, and Oscar has become so good at dealing with and understanding Lando in all his time with him that Lando actually has become dependant to the point that if Oscar got sick and temporary secretary was hired in place till he recoverd Lando would be all grump and snappy because first he's not able to see his sweet Oscar, and second that guy can't do anything right like Oscar can. Then Oscar's subjected to Lando's whining when he's back. One year into his internship (Oscar was probably 19 or something Lando 20-21) office secretary escalated into being Lando's personal secretary, taking care of him when he's sick, Lando giving him his penthouse keys Incase Lando forgets something, Oscar cooking for Lando because in his opinion, Lando cannot survive on ramen noodles everyday much to Lando's dismay.
Resigning? That was out of the question, but Oscar probably does it atleast once a month just to mess with Lando, but he won't really, they've got like this found family going on.
Ok this was a rant, I have so many ideaaaas
MATE YOU TOTALLY GET IT!!!!
lando has become so dependant to oscar to the point where lando just couldn’t take care of himself if it’s not oscar who’s taking care of him.
and yes about the resign thing was just a silly plan where oscar tried to mess up with lando (for a month or so he mentioned about resigning) and it frustated lando. he can’t live without the sweet guy beside him! and the scenario of not seeing oscar everyday suffers him.
i can imagine lando grew so fond over oscar, even lando’s penthouse was somehow their house together. oscar’s house was nearly UNTOUCHED since lando always told him to come over and spend time with him in his crazy luxury penthouse. even if it’s just oscar cooking for both of them, having dinner together, or just talked about random things.
lando loves and goes head over toes for his secretary. the man even let oscar bought his hoodie (specifically the ‘Playboy’ one) since lando likes seeing oscar wearing his clothes. cuddling while watching netflix with oscar using lando’s hoodie, soft kisses on cheeks, reassuring words everytime lando or oscar needs comfort.
and don’t forget lando is rich, RICH. so the brif often spoils the love of his life; buying him luxury gifts, expensive perfumes, buys him some cars, even if oscar had plead to him to stop but lando won’t stop if it comes to spoiling his boyfriend.
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dailyharuka · 11 months ago
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Welcome to Haruka Kiritani Everyday!!!
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This blog is ran by two people!!
mod 💫 and mod 💧
Started February 29, 2024!
anyways hihi!! i think haruka kiritani is so cool and you should totally follow if you like haruka kiritani from the hit game project sekai because she is so cool and like super cool and uh shes cool!!!
i might sit and yap about her, spam card photos, drop trivia, maybe even doodles... in short there will be haruka kiritani content on this
also feel free to throw whatever you want in the ask/submission box!!! you can ask questions, give doodle requests, drop fun facts... whatever else people do with that cuz tbh idk!!! woohoo!!!! hope you like the blog!!
Tag explanations
#dailyharuka the daily posts have Day [number] in the title. It caps at 10 posts per day (which is why 1.1, 1.2, 1.3, etc. is used rather than 1.01 or a different variant)
#notharuka posts that don’t relate directly to Haruka. Might be asks, reblogs, and other account related activities. Or it might not! Who knows!!!
#dailyhrkasks stuff from the ask box
#dailyhrkreblogs Reblogs!! (feel free to mute cuz it might just be talking to people)
#dailyhrkdoodles this post includes an original drawing of Haruka. These may be notebook sketches to fully rendered art.
#dailyhrkspeaks yapping
#dailypurpled hate fighting (or regular talking) with daily purpled :3 (feel free to mute this one cuz its just gonna be silly)
Btw if something is posted and you want to know where it came from pls feel free to ask!!
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sidesteppostinghours · 4 months ago
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pulps law is that whenever i get insane enough about something, i will inevitably attempt to make a persona 5 au, regardless of whether or not i am successful at it.
#pulp speaks#anyways guys youre never going to guess what au ive been thinking of lately .#i know the correct way to go about this is make sidestep the main character but you see#i will not be doing that. and actually in fact i will not be following the storyline of persona 5 in the slightest. because lol#but morgana exists in this au purely because i dont think the others would survive without him explaining what the metaverse is 💀#the rangers are a team of detective for the public sector in this au#and dr mortum is an unassuming everyday scientist that should not peak the rangers interest in any way. at all#in the video game that exists in my head the player can pick between playing julia or ricardo#it doesnt change the storyline that much but it does make the character relationships funky so#in my head chen is best friends with julia and argent is best friends with ricardo#chen and ortega stumble into the metaverse together so if you pick julia its two best friends in a life or death situation#but if you pick ricardo its your sisters best friend+kinda your boss in a life or death situation which personally i find extremely funny#regardless of which ortega you play with the other one doesnt know about the metaverse until id say like. the end of the first palace? beca#use thats when they start getting suspicious#and because this is ortega they follow them and find out about the metaverse that way#i dont think they become a phantom thief but i think they do end up covering the others asses irl#dr mortum still isnt actually a doctor but i think theyre the one providing medicine to them at the start of the game#theyre extremely wary of the rangers at the start and ortega can barely convince them to sell them things which they still charge-#-extremely high over. i think the turning point comes when they discover the metaverse because holy fuck they are So excited about it#both because of the implications and what the metaverse could be used For#chen is not thrilled about letting them know this but theyre kind of their supplier so its not like he can argue#i think mortum joins the phantom thieves eventually but as a navi#obviously its in their best interest to provide everything for free now that theyre part of the team but they still have to order supplies-#-so i think the way it works out in game is that theres certain days supplies can be ordered and you have to pay for it but the items can b#-picked up at any day of the week#but also i have no idea how that would work practically (its all in my head anyway so it doesnt actually matter but yk)#theres still more thoughts about this but im ✨running out of tags✨ and also i cannot organize my thoughts enough to explain it#im not main tagging this its going to be my silly self indulgent au for eternity ok
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opens-up-4-nobody · 5 months ago
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...
#bleh. i need half the country to pls stop being on fire. id like to go out and run pls. but its so smokey i can barely see the mountain#i live near :-/ also im just tired and frustrated. its incredible how quickly i vasilate between#things r going well. i should stay in my program and work with cyanos forever. to no no no im not cut out for this. i gotta leave. to yay#let me throw myself head first into consuming every second of my life with working. but only on the things that dont require me to think#which is y im not cut out for this and should be bannished to a world of only doing lab work and following instructions#also i have an screening interview monday for an R0DBT group. so i might b going to control freak classes#assuming i cant convince the lady that im not fit for thr class. which obviously i am bc im my therapist listed the ppl who r#usually put into r0dbt and i was like hm im a lot of those things. but also its 2hrs every week and thats a lot of time. and i feel like im#already on the path away from violently structuring my life specifically bc ive done so much damage#ugh. also i have ridiculously high self standards but i only do anything halfway bc i cant fail if i never try 100%.#so im like a fake control freak. or rather i cant even fully commit to being controlling. im lazy and i dont have the drive.#which almost makes it worse bc im stading at this threshold of control where it destroys me but never actually succeeds in being a perfect#thing. which is def a distorted way to think about it but there u go. ugh. im just tired and my arm hurts too much to draw bc#im older and older everyday. and i dont wanna read papers. i dont wanna grade or work on my presentation. i didn't want to spend 3.5 hrs#doing transfers this morning. and my mom's been dead for 6months and 3 days now. and i still dont kno where ill be a year from now#unrelated
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iftitah · 9 months ago
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#the more i stay around people the more i want to become like them out of spite#because i was so surprised these people are at least 24-26 years age some even did a minor bachelor's before coming here#some have completed post grad and then joined#like aren't you all too fucking old to act that immature#i grew so resentful of everyone how they keep on doing the worst low man shit and then victimize themselves#hypocrites full of shit they don't want to hear the truth#i know no one has the audacity to take a fight with me on here because they know im the youngest here#not because im the youngest but because im better#the girls frown upon me because i don't hear their low mindset humorless jokes and pointo out where they fall short#oh [my irl name] youre so stiff hamesha kami kyun nikalti rahti ho hamesha baat kaatne ki aadat hai learn to take a joke#mazaak hi to kar rahe hain kya yaar#ive cried so many times because i feel suffocated here and out of hate i want to act immature selfish hypocrite too so i do#i become self centered and look into my needs#but everyday bcg shows me how one stays firm in mindset even amidst surrounding of shit people#he points out to me all the time when i start acting like them he says why aren't you trying to rise above#i say ham bhi karte hai na unn chutiyon jaisa behave kyunki unhe unhi ki language mei samajh aata hai#achha ban kar honest banne se kuch nahi milta yaha#but he knows his stuff#he never does these things#however much i let evil thoughts take upon i get astounded everyday how he's practicing his rightful his honesty even tho no one's looking#it makes me want to cry#i hope he gets so ahead in life i hope he stands at the podium one day on a stage and deliver speeches where people actually can see him#like he sees the orator that come to attend our unis gatherings and says everytime kuch to baat hoti hai inn logon mei#i hope he achieves whatever he wants i hope he gets ahead of everyone all this fucking corruption#its not that he's done anything that im applauding he tries his best#and maybe teachers see that too all in class they're only looking at him and teaching they know#do you know how fucking hard it is not get corrupted in this uni and become one of those assholes that have done things unimaginable#im inspired everyday ill try my best to be like him#i do not just want to praise him i want to become someone he doesn't have to say fir tum bhi vahi karogi to kya farq reh jaayega#kuch bada nahi hota logon ki roz roz ki choti choti aadaton se pata chal jaata hai vo kaise hain
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pilonciillo · 1 month ago
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i genuinely don’t know how i’m supposed to act at my age
#like when i have to talk to ppl my age irl they sound old af 😭 and im like are they old or just actual adults?#like i know when to act mature but when in the same age group i feel like i should have my adult voice on#like a customer service voice but more casual???#like for this get together i’m fear i might be one of the youngest ppl there besides like the children of everyone else 💀 like i can go#can’t***#hangout w them and later ima go see my friends and it’s more relaxed but it’s not like we talk about random shit#like we don’t listen to the same music watch the same shows or movies anymore#or they say oh i don’t have time for that or i don’t watch/listen to that many more#????? what do you do? and they’re not on social media besides fb or twt#like unfortunately i’m part of the chronically online 💀💀💀 but i can’t just be like oh im knitting this or crocheting that because that’s my#old lady hobbie i picked up in hs and they were like that’s old ppl shit#they talk about work but i find that so boring idc about what i do everyday that shit stays the same 😭#like it’s interesting to listen to them because i don’t do it but my job it’s same day in day out#and if we talk about fitness it ends up at oh i gained some weight or i lost x amount that means i can have a xyz and not care ….#we are mid to late twenties when tf did you get heartburn 😭 and wtf is that ??? i’ve heard about it but what do you mean??? when did that#start??? like yeah old bones and body aches but damn another meme post about it 😭 stop#like what did i miss when did i stop looking where did yall learn all this#at this point i think im just immature#like my random shit is gonna be ceo/luigi and sk then what i can’t bring up rap kpop spotify wrapped anime my excitement for some local yarn#how i don’t think lady gaga is a good actress or that im lowkey upset about the wicked movie#or that there’s gonna be an american psycho remake like they’re not gonna care#and i can’t be like tf is an appetizer ? that isn’t just restaurant and tv show shit ?#I CANT TELL THEM ABIUT MY PERIOD SHOES I FEEL LIKE THEYRE TONNABNOT LAUGH#my talking points are work (boring and same as always) old car accidents most recently accident (but not too deep) shoulder and back pain#progress maybe complain about grocery prices 😭😭😭#omfg wtf am i supposed to where to the get together with appetizers FUCK#is it chill to go in shorts and a tshirt ????? i’m sure they know we’re the ones smoking outside they can just assume i’m too chill#let’s hope someone has a baby and i can distract them w my ability to somehow charm babies 😭😭😭😭#omg what if their kids are blaming us for the weed smell !?? like imma not narc but i’ve seen them out there too#like idk if they’re college age but i don’t think they’re open about it and im the freak taking walks past midnight 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
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gifti3 · 2 months ago
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its been a long time since i found a game that had me excited for whats to come
this is a me thing that im talking about below... usually when i play games, its mainly about it preoccupying my brian with tasks and goals. this is why i gravitate towards sim and management games! to me thats whats enjoyable
i feel like its rare that i just play something just cause its fun to me if that makes sense. and i think infinity nikki is managing to do that like im not progressing through the story super quickly and kind of just letting myself explore, dress up and take pictures at my own pace and im really hoping it stays like this for me for a long time
#this doesnt apply to VNs btw i play those purely for story like 95% of the time lol#im mainly talking about games with actual moving gameplay if that makes sense#anyways im really excited for houses#im gonna fill mine with plushies if possible#but like seriously i feel the last time i felt like this was...#probably when i was a child and i first really started getting into mmos#stuff like toontown and pixie hollow and neopets online etc etc#maybe its just a me getting older thing but like...i really do just get into doing the tasks and consider that enough#and im not saying i dont like doing tasks and like setting goals for myself (i like these types of games)#or that i dont play for other reasons too like story#its just nice to switch it up sometimes and just be in the experience and not thinking about what i need to do next#and tbf there have been times when im dragged into game for task reasons when thats not the point of the game!#unfortunately ffx1v was one of those games for me#so i didnt see the point of paying monthly you know#honestly if it wasnt subscription based id probably play more but id like touch the game once or twice a week to make progress#or play with friends#since i wasnt really getting pulled into the world#then for time princess its become more about doing dailies and collecting stuff#my otome gachas i still have...i dont even read the stories anymore i just log in to complete dailies so i can collect cards#tw/st im there for the story but it still falls into me mainly logging in everyday to complete tasks and lvl up cards#since im not always in the mood for reading the story#i think with nikki im gonna have to definitely let myself not log in EVERYDAY to do dallies#once the initial exitement goes away#i should just play when the mood strikes so it doesnt become another game i log in to everyday for those dailies#im not too worried about it because like i said im not desperately trying to get through the story and collect stuff#and im fine getting whatever clothes i happen to get while playing#but still that daily stuff can become tedious and is part of the reason i dropped d33pspace even though i liked it#if ur not careful before u know it a game becomes a chore#and fomo has an easier time setting in#infinity nikki
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lyriumsings · 4 months ago
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i like a boy and i hate it actually
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toytulini · 7 months ago
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wish my fucking brain worked
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jackalhadrurusluvr · 9 months ago
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they should just give me a job
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welcometogrouchland · 2 years ago
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I will feel so tired that it's like my atoms are coming undone and I'm being made unreal...and then I will have a little chocolate treat and for 15 minutes I am whole and present again. Then the horrors
#ramblings of a lunatic#i remember feeling like this at the peak of my burnout and fatigue before#(also the same burnout and fatigue that took my interests and creativity and ground them into dust)#so I've concluded that i will just try and make it through the next two days as best i can (I GET FANCY RESTAURANT FOOD ON WEDNESDAY)#and then I'll just try to let my mental and physical health recuperate while finding excuses to hang w/ friends#cause that'll stave off thr madness of isolation#i wanna watch my shows and movies too and I'll finally be able to w/o guilt after the last exam :cries:#anyway. if you've noticed an uptick in me just sayin shit recently (in a way that may or may not be cause for concern)#it's bc I'm so close to getting out of the mines that having to wait any longer is driving me clinically insane#i wanna downplay the problem bc it's truly not that big a deal in some ways#but then i remembered that this is a) the longest I've gone w/o seeing my pals in like. nearly a month#and I've been at home doing the same stuff everyday for nearly a month too#and also IT'S THE FINAL EXAM I'M EVER GONNA DO BEFORE COLLEGE. IT'S A BIG DEAL MAN#so actually. yes I'm a bit of a drama queen but my slice of life problems have a place for mediation and bemoaning#but it's fine. bc we're gonna kill it#I'm gonna do sooooooo good on this test (<- manifesting)#it's. a little high pressure bc the last time i did a test for this subject (that I'm generally very good at) i majorly beefed it#but I've learned since then and I'm hoping. praying. also working hard but mostly hoping and praying#anyway. I gotta sleep soon bc i got so little sleep last night bc of the heat that i almost started crying at breakfast#LET'S GO LESBIANS (the lesbians are me. it's just me talking into a hall of mirrors)
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my haaaaaands are still fucked uuuuuup but when they’re unfucked up i’m gonna draw smth so sexy and delicious for my new skyrim oc i can see the comp in my mind’s eye it’d just make my hands fall off if i tried to draw it
#he’s a liiiiiiitle bit of a serial killer so i’m envisioning him in like a white gown/robe with his hair up like in fucking. ella enchanted#in the garden with caryalind thallery but the knife behind his back is just coated in blood and there’s a pile of bodies behind him that we#can see but cary can’t see. i LOVE cary btw if you haven’t tried him as a follower highly highly recommend#vaynis is a character i didn’t think i’d get all that attached to i just wanted to try out the ancient falmer mod and then i got like. SO#attached to him immediately. he’s not actually an ancient falmer he’s just like. a non betrayed falmer who’s 23. his dad was like the#ultimate ‘i survive everything bc i’m good at hiding’ kinda guy who was a child when the snow prince died and he just fucked off into the#jerall mountains for forever basically. and another falmer (much younger) stumbled on him up there and was like ‘dude wtf if you have#immortality magic why do you live in a wizard shack in the mountains’ and he was like ‘well. i’m wicked scared all the time you see’#so in exchange for teaching her the immortality spell he was like ‘will you have a baby with me so the falmer don’t die out’ and she was#like ‘yeah ok but i’m not raising this fucking baby. i’m leaving i’m not a mom. you won’t make me a mom’ and he was like ‘yeah sure ok’#secretly thinking if he built her a tower she’d stay. so every day he’d build the tower bit by bit with magic and everyday she’d plan to#leave and like in a fairytale they had the ‘i’m going to leave’ ‘i know’ conversation but then vaynis was born and she actually DID leave bc#she wasn’t a mom! she told him that! but he was like shocked bc he was a moron. and so he locked vaynis in his wizard tower and only let him#out to teach him how to hunt and track and forage. and vaynis really wanted to see the world but his dad would never change. so he planned#to leave and he picked himself out a nice breton adventurer to seduce into taking him along only when his dad found out he killed the breton#and locked vaynis back in the tower. and vaynis waited and watched and planned and pretended like he was sorry. and then one day he#knifed him in his sleep. and took his shit and escaped. but auriel wasn’t super happy about that so he shipwrecked him. and ever since theb#vaynis has been pretty pathetic. he’s working on it but like. it really is kinda embarassing to watch. anyway his new scheme for glory is to#join the thalmor and he IS really pretty so this thalmor agent in solitude was like ‘hey the heir to the aldmeri dominion is also here and#we like. really need him back and with his head in the game. the nords are stupid they think you’re a altmer but like. i know a bitch whose#race is supposed to be extinct when i see one. you seduce caryalind thallery back into line and we’ll help you do whatever you wanna do to#restore the falmer. ideally it’s integrate with us.’ so vaynis obviously takes that fucking opportunity but problems arise bc caryalind#isn’t quite as seduceable as previously thought. yeah he’s flirty but he’s also looking for something serious and trying to become a better#person. so vaynis is on a journey of ‘get aldmeri prince to marry me and have his baby to achieve greatness’ when they stumble into helgen#after alduin attacks (bc as we all know i’m addicted to the ‘the prisoner dies and akatosh has to pick a new dragonborn’ narrative’ and he#) and akatosh picks vaynis honestly? to be funny. i love interpreting akatosh as a smartass it’s so funny to me#‘yeah there’s a whole world riding on this but like. wouldn’t it be kinda hilarious to see what happens?’#alternatively maybe akatosh and auriel are one in the same. you decide#anyway becoming the dragonborn really complicates this plan like. MOST severely
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tortademaracuya · 1 year ago
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It feels undeserving 👍
#once again thinking if i should like. not tell anyone#not tell anyone when the festival will be held nor my thesis defense#dont tell anyone absolutely anyone so no one can come see me#whyshould i make people waste time on seeing probably one of the worst things i have worked on#i feel. judged everyday. nothing is as good as it should be#this does not feel like a feat but rather a terrible shame#who cares about my degree i always feel like im being shamed when someone broughts up the fact im working on my thesis#i like what i study. dont get me wrong. and i dont think this in general. this is a me only issue and iknow that#and i know everyone would get upset with me#not like my mind cares haha the thoughts wont stop even if i try to be rational#i feel like such a terrible burden just asking for help. i feel like everyones thinking what a disappointment i am#i shouldnt need help. i should be doing this alone. and it should be way better than the garbage im making#last class the professors asked me 'why did u rate yourself so low? your work is fine'#i didnt even pick the low option i wanted. i picked a higher one to be generous with myself. i wish i had picked a 1. thats what i deserved#even if they say it looks good or that they r excited to see what i make. it all sounds like lies in my head#no one showing up is what i deserve. i shouldnt ask for help. i shouldnt celebrate anything#i wish people would yell at me and tell me what a fuck up i am#'the people that love you would be excited to help you if you would actually let them'#it all feels like a set up for showing what an idiot i am#haunted.txt
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