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goldendynastys · 23 days ago

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wonderland (pt. 2) | cs

summary: being home alone with your pets has always put you on edge, especially at night when you get extremely anxious. you thought you were over it towards the end of your parents’ vacation, but when a random stranger breaks in one night and insists on taking you with him, everything you once knew had begun to change. you knew how your story would end, you just weren’t sure if it was for the better, or the worst.

pairing: choi san x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+, MDNI | yandere, angst, fluff, eventual smut word count: 10.3k warning/tags: yandere, kidnapping, manipulation, stockholm syndrome, obsession, somewhat toxic relationship, fast burn, reader is innocent, angst, arguments between san and reader, lots of fluff, pet names, i think that is it but please let me know if i missed anything (i’m new at this), i hope you enjoy reading! <3

disclaimer: all members of Ateez are faces and name claims for this story. this is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment, or representation of real-life people. any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real life scenarios.

────────────────────── chapter two, echoes of the unknown (← previous | next →)

It had only been a week since you were taken by that thing (you hated calling San by his first name, he didn’t deserve it), and it had truly been the longest week of your life. He was constantly smothering you whenever he could, flirting and teasing you. How did he not see that this was wrong? How fucked up this situation was? It bothered you to no end, and you did everything in your power to avoid San as much as possible.

The first few days were easy; low and behold, he also had a Pitbull named Gunner and a German Shepherd named Tank, who required a good amount of attention. Thankfully, you opted to spend as much time with them as you could so San could “get a break” (when in reality, it was just so you didn’t have to spend time with him). Though San trained them in a way that would allow them to find you if you were to ever escape, they were quite sweet. Supposedly, he had rescued them from being forced into dogfighting three years ago, and they were with him ever since. You thought they deserved a better owner than him, but you were glad he didn’t treat them terribly.

The last two days, however, were the worst. San didn’t have any work obligations coming up, so he decided it would be best if the two of you spent time together. So, he nearly forced you to cuddle with him on the couch after dinner and watch television. His grip was tight, tight enough to keep you in place no matter how hard you tried to move. Though he didn’t say much, except for gently stroking your hair or kissing your forehead, it was still exhausting being in his presence. You wanted nothing more than to just punch him in the face and make a run for it.

Your plans to escape were delayed, but that was because of your revelation that you would get caught if you went too soon. Of course, it’s expected that the kidnapee wants to escape as soon as possible and they’ll take the first chance they get. If you wanted to escape successfully, you would have to wait a little longer. More than a few days, but not more than a month or two. Once you hit a month, you’d take an opportunity you were given to bolt.

For now, you waited. You waited and put up with San’s bullshit, no matter how much it made your skin crawl. Despite how evil and annoying you thought he was, he didn’t treat you terribly. He didn’t yell at you when you protested against him, he never physically hurt you, he always made sure you ate food. It was the bare fucking minimum, but it was better than being treated like actual shit. You could put up with this for a few more weeks, but that’s it.

This morning made it hard for you to stay put and do nothing. You had a dream while you slept, your first one since you got here. It was the weekend before Halloween, one of your favorite holiday’s of the year. Your family held a costume party for the Sons of Anarchy, where everyone would gather at your house and sit by the bonfire, or watch scary movies in the living room. It was just a peaceful night, sharing laughs with your family and singing old songs your parents and the older members loved. It was the first time you felt connected to the group, like you were actually one of them.

When you first woke up, you thought you were at home. You assumed your mother would be downstairs cooking breakfast while your dad read the paper, your brother groggily walking in to pour himself a glass of orange juice. You were waiting for your dog to break into your room and cuddle with you until you decided to get up for the day.

Your stomach dropped once you realized you weren’t at home. No, the sheets were rougher than normal, the material completely different than what you had on your bed. The sun hit your face less in this room, as compared to how hard it hit you in your’s. And as much as you loved having San’s cat, Pip, curled right next to your legs, your cat at home never slept with you, she preferred to sleep alone in her bed downstairs. All of this made you realize that you were no longer at home, and it was all just a silly little dream.

You could feel a pang of anxiety hit your chest, now wanting to stay in bed for as long as you could. You still had no idea what San was capable of, he was terrifying. He could be putting on this sweet and loving act to get you to trust him, and then bam! He would suddenly turn cold and treat you horribly. Everyday, you wondered what he was going to be like, and it was exhausting. You were growing sick and tired of being in this place, and he was making it harder for you everyday. You wanted to leave right this instant, but you knew you had to wait, and it made you angry.

Pip kept rubbing against you. It was cute at first, as all cats were, but you knew it was because she had to get out of the room, whether she was hungry or needed the bathroom. You knew opening the door would make a sound, therefore causing him to hear it and thinking you are awake, which would make him talk to you. And you were not in the mood to speak to him. You never would be, as a matter of fact. Carefully, you opened the bedroom door and helped his cat get out, quietly closing it so San wouldn’t hear you.

It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep again. Only an hour had passed, however, but you felt more awake than you did before. The house felt quieter, too. You could just sense it, there weren't a lot of sounds from downstairs and no music playing. San must’ve left for “work” or had to go out and run errands. You hoped he did, and you hoped he would be gone all day.

The cool air hit your legs as you made your way downstairs. Cold mornings were something you enjoyed, especially during the spring and summer months. It made you feel more awake, ready to take on the day. The weather seemed promising — if it stayed this way, you for sure were going to escape and find your way back home.

There were no sounds coming from the kitchen or living room. The house felt completely empty and a sense of relief washed over you. However, it was quickly crushed when you heard music coming from one of the rooms down the long hallway. Fucking hell. San must’ve been working out and just now decided to put on some music. At least you didn’t have to deal with him first thing in the morning, you at least needed an hour before you were “ready” to speak to him.

You planned on ignoring him until you heard laughter and some grunts. He wasn’t alone. It’s not like you cared or anything, you just wanted to know who exactly was in the same space you were also in. You wanted to make sure they weren’t more insane than San was, that they wouldn’t try to hurt or murder you for simply existing. It was a reasonable explanation for why you were going to see him. Nothing more, nothing less.

Silently, you made your way to the gym, walking gently so they wouldn’t be able to hear you. Once you got closer, you placed your hands on the wall and brought your ear closer to the door. In the gym was San, as expected, but there were two men that you had never seen before. One had short brown hair and was slightly buff (he reminded you of a brown bear), while the other was slightly taller and had long, black hair (and was undeniably gorgeous; perhaps it was the way he had half of his hair tied back in a ponytail). The two of them spotted San while he lifted some heavy dumbbells.

“So when are you getting your girl again?” San asked as he slowly lifted the weight up. “I think I’m good after this set, I’m just going to sit on the cable row machine.��

San swiftly moved from the weights to the cable row machine. As he began to pull back on it, you couldn’t help but notice the way his chest pushed out whenever he went back, and how big his muscles looked. You continued to stare at him while we worked back and forth (though you were mentally scolding yourself for looking at him that way).

The slightly buff man only shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, I wanted to get her on Saturday, but Hongjoong was pissed off about it. He says that you and I doing it back-to-back wasn’t good for business. He says that we can take time off whenever we want, so I don’t get why he’s mad at us for going at the same time. Either way, I’m getting her soon.”

The way they spoke about this entire situation made you want to vomit. How could anyone say such terrible things? “Getting his girl” as in kidnapping her and taking her away from her family? How was this normalized between this group of men? Why was this normalized? There had to be a deeper reason for this, why they all collectively acted this way. You wanted to figure out why — maybe it could help you escape and get them thrown in prison.

The taller man shrugged his shoulders. “It’s because we have a lot going on these next few weeks. Drug deals, fights, meetings — we can do whatever we want, yeah, but Hongjoong and I want everyone there to make sure everyone knows what’s going on. It’s so we can all work efficiently, and when two people are out, it can cause a small problem.”

“Fair, but man do I want to go and get my girl. She’s so beautiful, I just want to bring her home,” he explained with a dramatic sigh. “Any advice on how to get her? How long will it take for her to warm up to me?”

San let out a laugh. “I can’t tell you that, Jongho. My girl doesn’t even like me, she’s still pissed off that I took her away. She refuses to look at me, and talks back whenever I try to have a talk with her. I’m not sure what your girl is like, but mine is kind of a brat. It’s hot, but she doesn’t go down without a fight. So I don’t know, you just have to go with the flow, I guess.”

“If she talks back, then why don’t you punish her? If you punish her, then she’ll stop fighting back and will actually listen to you,” the taller man suggested.

“No, I don’t think it’s smart. And it’s so old-fashioned, too. She’s not a dog, she can have reactions and thoughts about things. I’m not gonna punish her for that. Do I wish it was easier and that she was nicer to me? No shit. But that’s the way it is right now. When she’s fallen completely in love with me, it’ll be easier. Not sure when that’ll happen, since I think she literally wants to kill me, but it’ll happen one day. I just know it,” San explained.

“I think that day’s going to come sooner than you thought, Sannie,” the taller man interrupted with a smirk on his face, looking directly at you.

The other two turned their heads to see you standing in the hallway. A smirk rose on San’s face, while you immediately turned around and tried to sprint down the hallway. You were stopped, however, once Gunner and Tank came running towards you, happy as ever. They began to circle and sniff you as part of their morning ritual, and you weren’t able to move. Great.

You felt San’s arms wrap around your waist and turn you around. A wide smile was on his face, clearly happy to see you. “Good morning, baby. Did you sleep well?”

When he tried to give you a kiss, you immediately put your hand in front of your face near his lips. “Ew. Your breath stinks and I just threw up. It’s too early for this.”

A look of concern rose on his face, placing a gentle kiss on the palm of your hand. “Are you okay? Why didn’t you call me? Was it something you ate?”

You immediately got grossed out and wiped your hand on his black tank top, which you realized was covered in sweat from his workout. You were clearly seething, but you decided to keep your mouth shut. “I’m fine, I don’t need your help. In fact, it was actually the most peace I’ve felt since I was forced here against my will. I really wish I could have that peace all the time.”

Jongho couldn’t help but laugh at your words, the other man joining in as well. “When you said she was a brat, you weren’t kidding. You forgot to tell us she was funny, too.”

Your face scrunched up in disgust. You wanted to smack him in the head for his awful comment — everyone in the room, actually. Subconsciously, however, you noticed yourself shifting more closer to San, your hand now on his chest as you looked at the two other men. Perhaps it was because out of all of them, you knew San the best and wanted to be closest to the person most familiar to you. You still hated him, of course, you just wanted to be by him in case the other men tried to do something and you needed protection. Your hatred for Choi San would never change.

San chuckled. “She’s a comedian for sure.”

He then introduced them to you, telling them your name to be polite (even though they already knew who you were). He spoke your name again when it was your turn to meet them. “The man on your left is Jongho, and the other is Seonghwa.”

“Hi?” You introduced yourself, confused. “Not sure if I’m supposed to be happy about meeting you, given the circumstances.”

“Don’t worry, we know who you are. San over here wouldn’t shut up about you for months. We’re finally glad he got off his ass and finally made a move,” Jongho joked, making Seonghwa snicker at his comment.

You could see San’s cheeks turn pink as he said those comments, but remained collected nonetheless. “As if you weren’t all excited and annoying when you found your girl. You can’t stop talking about her! Is it wrong for me to praise and show off my girl?”

“Yes, on so many levels,” you cut in.

The men just stared at you, San rolling his eyes at your behavior. He just ignored your comment and focused on his friends. “Sorry, how else am I supposed to act when I’ve found the woman of my dreams?”

Seonghwa chuckled. “Okay, fair. I was the same when Hongjoong and I started going out. But that doesn’t mean that I wasn’t annoying.”

“It’s true. I seriously considered slapping you in the face to get you to snap out of it. And San, too,” Jongho joked. The thought brought a small smile to your face, but you kept to yourself.

San only shrugged his shoulders and pulled you into his chest more. “Love will make you do crazy things, I guess.”

“Indeed it does,” Seonghwa agreed. “But I do think Jongho and I have to leave now. We have to shower before our meeting and errands today. You’re meeting us in, like, two hours?”

“Yeah, I just need to shower and I’ll meet up with all of you. Thanks for coming out today, bro. I appreciate it,” San answered. The way we said that and the words he chose made you cringe. Maybe it was because you hated the way “gym bros” spoke to each other and how unintelligent they sounded. You knew it was bad to assume that all gym bros were unintelligent, but you weren’t entirely wrong. Especially with San and his friends — they certainly weren’t the kindest people and perhaps they weren’t the brightest, either.

Seonghwa nodded and turned towards you, and Jongho did the same. “Nice meeting you,” he started, saying your name at the end of his sentence. “We’ll probably cross paths multiple times in the future.”

“Thanks,” you responded curtly. You muttered I hope not very quietly so no one could hear you.

You immediately left San’s grip once the two men left. As you started to make your way upstairs, he called out to you, concerned. “Are you alright? You just got sick, you have got to be feeling lousy. Do you want some water, some advil? I can take your temperature and see if you’re running a fever—”

“No, no that’s okay. I don’t need anything, so I’ll just . . . go back to sleep, I guess. No need to bother me, I’ll just be resting and sleeping, and I have no idea when I’ll wake up! So, yeah. Bye,” you tried to make a run for it, but stopped yourself once San began speaking again.

“You should at least eat something,” he suggested. “I heard a plain piece of toast will help, it’s supposed to be light but help you digest better. I was going to make French toast and bacon, your favorite, but I can make it for dinner or breakfast tomorrow. I’ll make you some toast now.”

Before you could protest, he made his way to the kitchen and threw a piece of bread into the toaster. Gunner and Tank had reappeared, all happy that you and San were awake. They began to smell you, and you couldn’t help but let out a small laugh as you scratched their ears. You decided to only focus on them in hopes it would make all of this go away for a little bit.

“You’re both so sweet, tough but so so sweet. You’re too adorable, I already love you,” you spoke to them sweetly.

“I’m surprised at how nice they are,” San started. You wanted to roll your eyes in a very obvious way, but you chose not to. “They were going to be trained and used in dogfighting competitions, but the owner got arrested while they were puppies. My friend was able to hook me up and I took these two home. I have not regretted it at all.”

“Well, good, because it would be really sad if you did regret it. These poor dogs don’t deserve to be with you in the first place. If you hated them, I’d take care of them myself or find them a home with someone who would actually care for them,” you scoffed.

San nodded his head. “Good thing I care about them, then.”

You rolled your eyes this time. As if he could actually care about anything. He was a narcissistic asshole who only cared about himself, how could he care about animals? You began to wonder if there was something happening behind the scenes, if San actually treated them terribly when you weren’t around. No, they would be afraid of him if he did, and they seemed to be somewhat calm whenever he was around. Perhaps they did like him (but you hoped they would grow to like you better).

A plate being put on top of the kitchen table snapped you out of your thoughts. It was a plain piece of toast, looking as boring as ever. San sat down with his eyes glued to you. “Eat this, it should help settle your stomach.”

“I’m all set, thank you. Wouldn’t want to get sick again, especially all over you and the kitchen. Oh wait, actually . . . maybe I will eat then,” you joked slyly, your arms now crossed over your chest.

San chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. “I wouldn’t care, Princess. Your attempts to make me angry are so cute, but they aren’t going to work. Now, please eat before your toast gets cold.”

“You sure about that? I guarantee that if I vomited on your shirt, you’d throw a hissy fit and get all mad at me,” you protested.

“I really wouldn’t. I have plenty more shirts in my closet, and I can buy more at the store. Please eat your food.”

“Hmm, I don’t think so. You most definitely poisoned it and are either going to kill me, or make me be weirdly obsessed with you, so I’m all set—”

“I’m not going to tell you again,” San cut you off sternly, saying your name as emphasis to how serious he was. His demeanor changed — now he seemed angry, more annoyed at the way you were acting. “Eat your toast before it gets cold, now.”

As much as you wanted to fight back, you were scared. You didn’t know what San was capable of, and based on his sudden mood change, you didn’t want to risk it. So, you slowly made your way to the table and sat down in front of the toast. Reluctantly, you took a bite. It wasn’t bad, just plain toast. You took a few more bites before claiming you were full.

You pushed the plate back towards San, who was now sitting in the chair directly across from you. “That . . . wasn’t terrible. Thanks. But if I start coughing up blood or violently throwing up within the next hour, I’m killing you with my bare hands.”

San chuckled. “Thank you, baby. I’m glad you enjoyed your breakfast,” he smiled. “I’m sorry for getting angry with you. I just don’t like it when you don’t listen to me. It’s adorable and cute sometimes, but I have to remind you of who’s in charge. You must listen to me when I tell you to do something, it’ll only make this easier.”

Make this easier? Remind you of who’s in charge? Who the hell says that to someone they claim to be their romantic partner?

The confused look you had on your face remained; you couldn’t shake it off no matter how hard you tried. You hated this, you hated being treated this way. Especially by him. You had no choice but to play along, unless you wanted to be killed, so you stayed quiet. But that didn’t mean your facial expressions couldn’t change, however, and express what you were truly thinking at that moment. At least you had that.

Shrugging your shoulders, you stood up and pushed in your chair. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever, I’ll do what you say, within reason, and you’ll stay off my case. Sounds like a deal to me,” you proposed. “And, for the record, I didn’t actually throw up.”

San furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “Then why did you say you did?”

“Because I didn’t want you to kiss me. Duh,” you answered in a matter-of-fact tone.

You could tell San was a little irritated, but he brushed it off. He really didn’t care, he just wanted to give you affection, and it made him sad when you rejected it (from what you could tell, because he supposedly really liked you). He just shrugged his shoulders. “Alright, it’s whatever. I’m just glad you had something to eat before I head out for the day,” he said. “I’m going to take a shower now . . . wanna join me?”

You felt your eyes fall out of your head as you processed the words he just said to you. “Um, no. No, I think I’m good, actually. I’d rather be bitten by a rattlesnake than ever do that. So no, no, I’m good. Please don’t ask me that question again. Like, ever.”

“Really? It could make up for the fact you wouldn’t let me kiss you earlier. I could use your help washing my hair and rubbing my sore muscles. Plus we’d be saving water, which is always a good thing,” San tried with a giant smirk on his face. He knew this would piss you off, and he did enjoy seeing you get a little angry.

“I’m sure you can wash your hair just fine. Truly, the environment will be okay if we don't save water. There’s plenty of other people who can help with that,” you explained.

He pouted his lip slightly, clearly upset by your choice. San stood up and slowly made his way towards you, his signature smirk now back on his face. “I’m hurt, Princess. I really wanted to spend some quality, intimate time with you before I left today. I won’t be late, so maybe we can spend time together then, yeah?”

“Again, would rather be bitten by a rattlesnake. Bye now,” you shooed him off in hopes to finally end the conversation.

He only chuckled and made his way towards you. Only, instead of heading right up the stairs, he approached you. As swiftly as ever, San wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close to his body. He placed one kiss on your cheek, and then another one on the other. He smiled at you. “For not getting my kiss earlier.”

Your face was red, and you didn’t know if it was from anger or nervousness. Either way, the only thing you wanted to do was push San off you, which you did successfully. You immediately wiped your cheeks with your hands to get his saliva off your body. “I am going to kill you, Choi San. I don’t care how long it’s going to take, but I will kill you. Mark my words!”

San couldn’t help but laugh at your words. “Whatever helps you sleep at night,” he joked, making his way up the stairs and into the bedroom.

You wanted to scream. And you almost did, except you were reminded of the two dogs and the cat that lived here and you didn’t want to scare them. Instead, you took a pillow and screamed into it. It didn’t make you feel better, but it helped relieve the tension and anger building up inside you. You groaned as you sat onto the couch. Gunner jumped up next to you and rested his head on your lap. You couldn’t help but giggle at how cute and gentle he was.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get us all out of here soon, away from that evil man,” you spoke sweetly as you rubbed his ears. You sighed as you let your thoughts wander. You weren’t really sure how you planned on escaping, but you realized that it was going to happen sooner than you thought.

After all that happened this morning, it made you realize one thing: you needed to get out, and you would do anything to escape and get away from the devil that was Choi San.

──────────────────────

If there was one thing you loved to do in your free time, it was to snoop around the house. When you were younger, your family was secretive of all the work they did and what went on. It was in your own best interest to be kept away from it, mainly because of how dark and complicated it was. Your parents didn’t want you anywhere near that, but nonetheless, you still tried to find out as much as you could.

You’d look at their bills and other mail sent to them (which was completely boring — you didn’t understand it at all). Whenever your parents or brother would be out for a meeting or other gang-related stuff, you’d sneak into their office to see what else they were hiding. Even then, it was boring as well. Some of it was drug costs and how much profit the Sons of Anarchy were making, issues with land and other gangs coming in unprovoked. You didn’t understand it, nor did you know why they would keep all of this from you.

Nothing mysterious ever came up when you searched through the office or the mail. And, for a long time, it bothered you. In the movies, they talked about the gangs present and everything they did, the anonymous threats they’d received and what they did to stop it. The fights, the drug deals, the trades, it was all so elusive. So elusive that it kept the movie interesting. You honestly thought it was a direct reflection of real life, but perhaps it wasn’t. Or it was and you weren’t just seeing the behind the scenes. Either way, you were a bit aggravated. You honestly thought your parents and brother were much cooler than that.

Maybe it was because you were searching for something to keep you entertained. Every day was pretty much the same: wake up, go to class, do homework, relax, sleep, and repeat. The weekends were no different, except you could actually sleep in and you didn’t have anywhere to be. You didn’t have many friends, and the ones you did have were either busy with their lives or lived far away. You couldn’t go out on your own, except with your family, but that wasn’t the kind of fun you were looking for, despite having such a blast with them.

You figured if your parents or brother were doing anything suspicious, they’d keep it hidden. Then you’d find it on your own and begin to solve the mystery, or see if you could help. If you wanted them to actually see how great you were, why not try with something from the family business? But still, nothing. You tried all the locked cabinets and drawers in their office, but there wasn’t anything. Perhaps there was nothing to hide, and that was just how the Sons of Anarchy ran things.

The hankering for mystery hasn’t left you yet, however. Now that you were taken by San and brought to his house, you could scope around and see if you could get any answers. Why you were here, who San really was, what he was planning. Surely there had to be something hidden within the walls of his home, even if it was small. A simple piece of information could go a long way.

When he had left to meet Seonghwa and Jongho (and others who did not know of, you didn’t know how many members were in their group, and a part of you didn’t want to know), you knew you had to act fast. You didn’t hesitate to put on the clothes you wore when San first took you. Luckily, since you were smart about where you kept things, you managed to keep your phone hidden in the closet under some shoes. You charged it in increments when you were alone, just enough to ensure you could call the police.

His office was located downstairs, in the hallway past the gym. You felt intimidated at first, mainly because you had never been in a private office like that. You didn’t know what to expect, nor did you want to mess anything up and get caught. Slowly, you entered and began to look around. It seemed plain at first, with only a desk and a few papers here and there. But the drawers had more information, from what you could see with some papers sticking out.

Immediately, you opened it and began to rummage through. Most of it was just tax documents and bills San had to pay, he probably kept it for filing purposes. The drawer on the other side had more documents, but nothing out of the ordinary. That is, until you turned around and saw the other ones.

Information about Ateez, along with San and its members, were kept here. You didn’t hesitate to open up the files; you needed all the information you could so you could put a stop to this. From what you were gathering, San kept records of who everyone was and things happening in the other gangs. It didn’t take you long to figure out that a man named Hongjoong was their leader. The way he presented himself and all the notes San kept from meetings they had made it obvious. Seonghwa was his second-in-command, practically the same position as Hongjoong, only doing more behind-the-scenes work.

The others had mundane roles. Software, finance, business deals — each person had their designated thing they were good at. San, of course, was part of the business deals group (whatever that meant). That probably involved drugs, money, or weapons, which scared you. Who knows what could happen during those interactions?

What scared you the most, however, was the fact that there was a file with your brother’s name on it. Your chest tightened in fear as you slowly reached for it, scared of what would be inside it. An old mugshot of his was the first thing, one from a few years back. The cops had arrested him because of his involvement in a bar fight. It was quite ridiculous, in your opinion, since he left right before the fight broke out. Despite that, why would San have your brother’s mugshot? Let alone an entire file on him?

More information was in it, all about who he was and he was doing. Motorcycle registration, meetings with the Sons of Anarchy and other gangs, the mechanic shop your family owns. There were photos of him in there as well, at various public places. You were in some of them, but they weren’t too mysterious. It was just you walking out of the store with him or going to a bar with him and his girlfriend. They were from public security cameras, but even then, how did San manage to get these? Did he threaten the employees? Did someone on his team hack into the system?

While you kept thinking about that, small pieces of paper were hanging out from the files you had opened. You also noticed another one sticking out from your brother’s file. Curiously, you opened the one about your brother. On it was writing, but only a little bit. As you began to read it, you realized it wasn’t actually about him. No, it was about you.

1/21/24

I think I found her. I think I found the love of my life, and she’s absolutely perfect. She’s everything to me already. With all that’s going on with her family, I will make sure everything goes according to plan.

That was all that was written, but you were still taken aback by his words. What the fuck did he mean by that? Was it just his plan to get you, or was there something more? Why did he mention your family? Nothing major happened with the Sons of Anarchy that you knew of, so what was San implying? Did he know more than you? How was all of this possible? It made no sense, and you were starting to get more and more nervous that San had something else in store for you. You had to get out of that house and away from him.

Right before you were going to bolt for the door, your curiosity got the better of you, and you opened the other file to see what the other pieces of paper were. Rather than being paper, they were actually photographs. Your heart stopped, worried that they would be photos of you. As you inspected them, you realized they weren’t (thank God). No, they were photos of San and some other members of Ateez. Not recent photos, however, they were from a while ago.

Everyone looked so . . . different. It was from a long time ago, of course, but they looked so happy. Especially San, who did not look the way he did now. No, he was much smaller, not as buff as he was now. Despite his smaller physique, there was an extra layer of warmth within him that radiated in that specific picture. He was posing with someone you didn’t recognize, and he had this gigantic smile. Something must have happened that day, because the other person was just as happy.

Either way, San just looked so different. He seemed less cold, less tough than he was now. You wondered what made him change — was it the work Ateez did that forced him to be a different person? Was it just because he wanted to be stronger? You hoped it was the latter, because it would be sad to see if this lifestyle made him into someone he didn’t want to be.

You could hear a vehicle being pulled into the driveway. Shit. San was back home. Shit shit shit. All of his paperwork and files were everywhere, you had no time to organize it all. At that moment, you didn’t care. You didn’t want to get killed before you made a run for it, so you had to act fast. You quickly grabbed your brother’s file and the old photo of San as you ran out of the office. You pressed your back against a wall in the kitchen, right next to the living room and hallway that led to the front door and remained still.

“Let me get this straight: we found the guy, Hongjoong and Mingi tried to get something out of him, but he escaped. Why? Those two are great at keeping people from escaping, were they ambushed?” A familiar voice asked, which you recognized to be Jongho’s.

There was a brief second of silence before someone else spoke up, who you did not recognize. “No, the cops came around. The guy apparently is wanted for other shit he’s done, so he made a run for it before they or the cops could catch him. Fucking bastard, can’t even own up to what he did!”

“The guy’s a pussy, what can you do?” Another unfamiliar voice added with a laugh. “It won’t be hard to catch him again, right? Yunho and I were able to find out where he lives, unless he magically packed up everything and decided to leave. If not, then why don’t we pay him a visit tomorrow and tell him he needs to finish what he started?”

“Already got that covered,” San answered nonchalantly, laughing as well. The mere sound of him made you want to roll your eyes, that’s how much he irked you. “We’ll break in late at night. Get him to come out of his room and force him on his knees. Then, as he’s begging for us to spare his life and offering us money, boom. I’ll put a bullet right between his eyes. Perfect ending, if you ask me.”

And now, the mere sound of Choi San made you want to vomit and run for the hills. The way he just spoke made your blood run cold. You knew San was dangerous, but part of you believed it was your anxiety making you overthink. To hear him say those words confirming your worst fears to be true made you more anxious than ever. If he could speak so confidently about killing an innocent human, you had no idea what else he could do; to you or your family. You had to get out of there, now.

Immediately, you took as many photos as you could of the files you found. If the cops were to come back to a burned down house, you at least wanted to have photo evidence of what was found in his office. The photos wouldn’t be much, but it would be enough to question why San had those files with him and what he planned to do.

Their conversation continued while you took photos. You abruptly stopped, however, once you heard one of the unfamiliar voices begin to talk. You had a feeling they were close by, and you were right. Standing two feet in front of you was a man, with long but short dark hair. He was about the same height as San and Jongho, maybe a little shorter. There was a certain aura to him that you couldn’t describe, almost cat-like. It was intimidating, he intimidated you. But it didn’t matter because you would never see him again after today.

A subtle smirk arose on his face once he realized who you were. “Ah, so are we finally going to properly meet the girl you brought home, Sannie? We’ve met before, but I’m not always the nicest when I’m asked to do things in the middle of the night. Disrupts my sleeping time.”

You didn’t say anything. Frozen, you slowly backed away from the man, who couldn’t help but laugh at your antics. “Wait, she’s here?” San called out, confused. He even said your name softly to show how concerned he was. His eyes nearly lit up once he saw you, but faltered once he noticed your phone and the files in your hands. He looked more concerned now. A bit upset, even. He called your name once more. “. . . What is that in your hands?”

Jongho and another member had walked into the room, confused at the silence. Once they saw what you were holding, everything made sense. “You should keep your shit locked up tight, bro,” the other member told him, patting him on the back.

But San didn’t care for his comment. No, his eyes were on you. He looked gentle, but angry. “I asked you what was in your hands. Why do you have a phone and my files?”

You were trying to find the words to fight back, but nothing came out. “You’re a monster.”

The men loudly laughed at your words. Clearly, you weren’t as scary or intimidating as you thought you were. Damnit, I wanted to sound cool, you thought to yourself.

San took a deep breath in before addressing your comment, agitated. “Baby, I’m going to need you to give me your phone and those files. Now.”

“No,” you told him sternly.

They continued to snicker, entertained by your attitude and defiance against San, who was starting to get very frustrated. His cheeks were red and he had an awful glare, almost as if he was about to explode. The fear inside you grew and you worried that he was going to hurt you — or worse, kill you. He wasn’t above murder, so why wouldn’t he hesitate to kill you if you disobeyed him? You weren’t going to let him, however. Not without a fight.

“Put her in her place, San!” One of them exclaimed as the others continued to laugh.

You sent them a glare before focusing on San’s next moves. His angered demeanor was still there and wasn’t going away anytime soon. Trying to think of your next move, you couldn’t help but glance at the backdoor. It was a sliding one, and the thought of just pulling it open and making a break for it had crossed your mind many times. You wanted to wait until the right time to escape, hence why you didn’t try it before. But now was your chance; it was risky, but you had to do it. Anything to protect yourself.

You turned to San with a look of fear and anger on your face. “You want these files? Here, take them!”

With one swift motion, you threw the files against his chest and ran right for the door. Within seconds, you were flying through the backyard into the woods with no sense of direction. Nothing else mattered, you just needed to get out. Out and away from San, his friends, his world. If you kept running, surely you’d find a road or a run-down diner that would let you use their phone.

He wasn’t far behind you, you could hear him and his friends running towards you, along with their angered grunts. Man were they fast. You rounded a corner and hit behind a small bush. It wasn’t that big, but you hoped it’d be big enough so they wouldn’t see you and would go another way.

Their footsteps and shouts got louder. You swore you could’ve seen San with Gunner and Tank in your peripheral vision, and your heart stopped. You didn’t think about what would happen if he caught you; surely he’d be very angry, but would he be physically violent? Would he actually kill you? The man deluded himself into thinking you were soulmates, would this behavior make him see red and hurt you? You didn’t want to find out anytime soon.

Luckily, a small rock was sitting right at your feet. You threw it in the opposite direction as yourself and watched as it landed near another set of trees. All four men stopped in their tracks and tried to locate the sound. They collectively agreed to move towards it, a wave of relief washing over you.

Their voices and steps were quieter now. Slowly, you stood up and became aware of your surroundings. It was just the woods, trees and leaves everywhere. Not a person or animal in sight, with the setting sun shining nicely on you. It was still. The tension could be cut with a knife. You weren’t sure if it was peaceful or fearsome.

But you had no time to waste, you had to keep pushing forward. You were about to start running until your phone started to ring, and of course your ringer was on. Normally it was off, but sometimes you had it on because you liked the way it sounded when you typed. And you just so happened to have left it on and forgot to turn it off. Goddamnit.

You quickly hung up so that the sound would stop. With no hesitation, you began to run. It didn’t matter if you were going east or west or even near the end of the fucking woods: you needed to get away. Your life basically depended on it.

As you continued to run, however, you were suddenly interrupted by something getting caught on your foot. You flung forward and began to roll on the ground. Sticks and rocks hit your body and face as you rolled, your cries loud and fearful. A rock or branch of some sort must have been hidden by the leaves and made you trip. Eventually, you stopped and found yourself under the sun, your body covered in dirt and leaves.

The sharp pain you began to feel came from your ankle, a pain you couldn’t just shake off. You groaned in disbelief and began to inspect the wound, which honestly made you more panicked. Though there was little blood, it still hurt like a motherfucker. You could barely move it without wanting to cry. If you couldn’t move it, then you couldn’t run. If you couldn’t run, San would find you sooner or later and punish you for your actions, maybe even kill you.

In the midst of your panic, you looked up to see San staring at you and holding Gunner and Tank’s leashes. He looked angry, but it was quickly gone and replaced with a smirk. He couldn’t help but laugh at how pathetic you looked, from what you gathered. “It’s all right boys, I got her!” He shouted, his smirk still plastered on his face. “Gotta say, I give you credit for making it this far. You made it longer than I thought you would, especially with all the branches. But we can’t beat them all, can we?”

“Fuck off!” You snapped as you started to push yourself away from him. You winced in pain as you did, gathering small rocks in case you needed to throw some for self defense.

The three men began to pile in, some even laughing at your attempts to move. Your face grew hot, but you ignored them and kept going. “You aren’t going anywhere, sweetheart. It’s cute that she keeps trying. Take out your phone and get this on video so we can laugh at it later,” one of them snickered. Within seconds, you flung the rocks at all of their heads, in which they yelped in surprise. “Jesus, what the hell was that for?!”

“Get away from me!” You shouted and scrambled to find more rocks.

As you continued, San had handed off the dogs to the man with longer hair and crouched down at your feet. He took your swollen ankle into his hand and inspected it carefully, the pressure making it feel worse. You bit your lip to make the pain more bearable, though it didn’t help much. It wouldn’t be a surprise if San decided to break it all together and leave you to die in the woods. A simple accident, he would probably call it.

“There’s nothing you can do now, just stop fighting me. You’re making a fool of yourself, Princess,” San told you sternly but collectively. His words didn’t work on you, you kept pushing back. “Now, you can either ask me politely to carry you home, or I will drag you there by your feet. It’s your choice.”

It was silent for a moment as you comprehended his words. You couldn’t help but let out a scoff, “seriously? You’re going to drag me back to your house? You wouldn’t dare.”

San paused for a moment and then shrugged his shoulders. “All right,” was all he said. He gave a nod to his friends, who started to make their way out of the forest. He didn’t hesitate to pick up both of your ankles and begin to move backwards, your back being pushed against the ground.

Once you realized he was actually going to drag you, you knew you had to stop it. You hated the way it made you feel, but you couldn’t be dragged home. “No! Wait, wait! Stop!” You cried.

San let out an annoyed sigh and did not move any further. “Yes?” He asked with a cold stare.

“I . . . I don’t want to be dragged home. I want you to carry me,” you stuttered nervously, physically cringing at the words coming out of your mouth.

A subtle smirk rose on his face, so subtle that you could barely see it. He wasn’t satisfied with your answer, however, and wanted to hear more of what you had to say. “But why? You didn’t answer my question, you just gave me an attitude. You also didn’t say please just now, and I find that very rude.”

You bit your tongue and held back your screams. If you wanted him to comply, then you would have to be nice and polite (though you wanted to kill him). It took you a few moments before you could answer, too embarrassed at this entire situation. You let out an awkward cough. “Y-You startled me. I didn’t t-think you’d actually do it. Y-You say you care a lot about m-me, so I figured you were b-bluffing. You aren’t playing around, I k-know that now. Can you please carry me home, S-San? I’m tired and I don’t want to f-fight with you anymore. Please? I’ll behave when I get home, I p-promise.”

He seemed satisfied with your words, your face now burning a bright red color. A bigger smirk now rested on his face as he placed your feet on the ground. San put one of his arms under your knees and the other around your upper body, picking you up with ease. You immediately wrapped your arms around his neck to make yourself more comfortable, even though you didn’t want to.

“Good girl, I knew you would listen and answer me politely,” he told you, kissing your forehead. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you behave when we get back.”

The fear in your stomach grew. You knew this fight wouldn’t be over, he had more planned for you. You were going to have to act fast when you got back, you couldn’t let him hurt or make an attempt to kill you.

It was hard to look up when San’s friends were there. They’d make a mocking face at you and all you wanted to do was bite their heads off. So you kept your face buried in the crook of San’s neck. You could tell he was enjoying this by the way he was breathing whenever you got close to him. Only a few more minutes of this, you told yourself.

When you got back to the house, the three men piled into the living room. You and San were already making your way towards the upstairs bathroom. You didn’t want to admit it, but he was very strong. Not only could San carry you for what felt like fifteen minutes through the woods, but he could also carry you up a semi-big flight of stairs? That man had serious strength. You wondered how he was able to do it.

But you couldn’t think about that right now. No, you had to think fast. How was San going to kill you, and what could you use to defend yourself? If you knew those two things, you had a pretty good shot at getting out of this alive. Possibly getting him arrested and in jail for good.

San placed you on the counter of the bathroom, leaning over to grab something from the cabinet. He looked you right in the eyes once he found what he was looking for, angry. “What the hell were you thinking? Running away like that, disobeying me? If I tell you to do something, you do it. You don’t run away from me, you know not to try and escape. I thought I could trust you, but after that little stunt today, I’m not entirely sure.”

As he reached for the items he pulled out, you immediately grabbed the bottle of soap that sat on the counter and held it in front of you. San was taken back by this action and furrowed his eyebrows. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Look, if you’re going to kill me, you have no chance. I’ve seen enough horror movies to know how this ends and I will make sure I get out of this alive. You may think you know how to kill me, but you’re wrong.”

San looked extremely confused, with his eyebrows furrowed and a confused look on his face. “W-What? Baby, what are you talking about? Why on Earth do you think I’m going to kill you?”

“I overheard your conversation,” you confessed. “You were practically gloating about how excited you were to kill someone. You were happy at the fact that you were going to murder an innocent person for no reason. Between that and the files you had on the Sons of Anarchy and my brother, it all added up in my head. You were going to eventually kill me and my brother. I had to make a run for it before you tried anything. I wanted to find a police station and get you arrested. I have photos of everything on my phone, that’s why I didn’t give it up.”

He paused for a moment, trying to process your words. San ran his hands through his hair and sighed. He seemed very confused and startled at your words. When he looked up at you, there was a sense of hurt and sadness mixed within his face. “It all makes sense now,” he whispered. “Princess, you need to know that I would never hurt you. What I was talking about with the guys has nothing to do with you or your brother. Did you… did you actually think I was going to kill you?”

“Well, yeah. You kidnapped me in the middle of the night and are forcing me to be your weird little girlfriend slash housewife. I don’t know you or what you’re capable of,” you answered truthfully.

San sighed again, this time more upset than before. You could tell that this hurt him, the entire situation. It was a little weird, since this entire thing was his fault, but San was insane. The man deluded himself into thinking you and him belonged together; he probably deluded himself into thinking that he messed up and the only way you’d forgive him was if he apologized.

He finally collected himself and shook his head. “I knew you weren’t trying to run away from me. You were just scared, you wouldn’t have done that if I didn’t say those things,” he started. San reached for what you now realized was rubbing alcohol. “This might sting a little, but I got you. I won’t let anything bad happen.”

You grimaced in pain as he poured the alcohol onto your swollen ankle. Once he cleaned up the blood, he carefully wrapped your ankle in a bandage to ensure it would heal properly. It hurt like hell, but this would blow over in a few days. You’ve seen your dad and the other members of Sons of Anarchy deal with much worse, this was nothing. “There you go. You can’t do much, but I’ll be here to help. Let's get you to bed, yeah?”

He didn’t wait for your answer. Rather, he picked you up off the counter and carried you to the bedroom, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. He sat you down on the bed and gathered extra pillows so you could elevate your foot. San pulled out a pair of shorts and a t-shirt for you to change into. He tried to help you do so by grabbing the ends of your shirt, but you immediately stopped him. “No, no. I can do this myself, please. I don’t want you to see my body, I’m not ready for that. Nor will I ever be,” you told him softly.

He took a step back and nodded his head. “All right, but you need to keep your foot elevated so it’ll heal better,” he reminded you. “We aren’t going to have dinner tonight, I’ll bring some snacks for us once I tell the guys to go home. Go get some rest, you’ve had a long day and you’re really tired. I’ll be up in a few minutes so we can eat and go right to bed. That sound good?”

“Uh, yeah, sure. But uh, take your time when saying goodnight. You know, there’s absolutely no rush. Really, I’ll probably be asleep and won’t be able to talk to you. Kinda a win for me, if you think about it,” you reassured him.

A small laugh left San’s body as he leaned over to place a kiss on your forehead. He placed his hand against your cheek, looking at you with adoration while he rubbed his thumb against it. “There she is, I missed her today. Oh, and I’m going to need you to give me your phone now. I saw you move it to your front pocket when we got into the bathroom.”

You gave him a sad look, almost as if you were about to cry (you weren’t, you just didn’t want to give him your phone). “But I have cute pictures of myself on there! How else am I supposed to get those back?”

San only laughed but didn’t say anything. You dramatically sighed and hesitantly handed the phone to him. “Thank you. I plan on getting you a new one, so you can take plenty of pretty pictures for me,” he reassured you. “Go to sleep, Princess. You need it after the stressful day you had.”

And within seconds, he was gone. You rolled your eyes and groaned into the pillow. You were so close. You could have gotten away if you didn’t trip over that stupid branch. You were aggravated, to say the least.

But your suspicions of San were correct. You knew there was something off about him, you just couldn’t figure out what. Now you know that he enjoyed murdering people and has probably killed people in the past. That idea sent shivers down your spine, the fact that you were sleeping next to a killer every night. You had no idea why San would willingly do such a thing, to take life away from an innocent person. You knew Ateez were terrible people who did terrible things, but you didn’t realize this was the extent of how evil they were.

The note you had found in San’s office was unsettling, too. What did he mean by everything goes according to plan? Was he talking about how he was going to kidnap you and take you from your family? Or was there something else he had in mind? He said he wasn't going to kill you, but could you really trust him? The possibilities were endless, but you knew something was wrong. And you weren't sure if you wanted to find out.

You could hear San saying goodbye to his friends, which meant that he would be coming to bed soon. With a sigh, you quickly stripped out of your clothes and changed into his, even though you’d much rather be wearing something else. His clothes were comfortable, but they were his clothes and you wanted nothing to do with him.

You began to think about how you were going to get out of this. You weren’t going to give up, that was for sure, but you really needed to think about what you were going to do to escape. Today was unplanned, impulsive. It was unexpected, too, but now you know that you need to be strategic. You knew you could do it, it would just take more time and effort to do so.

Today taught you many things. One, start snooping immediately after San leaves. Two, do what San says within reason, even if you don’t want to. It’ll save you time and embarrassment; the more compliant you are, the sooner he’ll leave you alone. If you could do those things, you’d be safe from harm. You hoped, at least.

You didn’t know what Choi San or his friends were capable of. If you could keep your guard up, you’d make it through just fine (hopefully).

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