#lets come back stronger

[born-to-lose-btl]

[munchboxart]

I promise I'm drawing, it's just taking some time to experiment

[s0fter-sin]

ghost stares at the ceiling, chest heaving in a harsh pant; sweat ice on his clammy flesh and soaked into the sheet he restlessly kicks away.

ears still ringing, his fingertips blindly drift down to trail along his vivisection scar. he half-expects blood to smear in their wake. his own line of solomon, who ordered him split in twain; half of him given to a grieving mother and half left with the grieving to be.

just for both his broken halves to be rejected.

what did it make him that his mother grieved him more than she loved him? that she begged to be relieved of him more adamantly than she begged to receive him? why did his worth spill out with his drawn blood? why was his pain lesser than hers?

his hand flexes, digging into the raised scar like it’ll part beneath his fingertips to plunge into his mangled insides. no one knows the cruelty of reforming the halved; his name, his being, not nearly as important as his body when he was stripped from himself. no one knows the pain of healing and understanding losing pieces of yourself means losing your value along with them.

how many more pieces did he have to lose before he was halved once more? before his very presence incurred grief so strong it was better to be rid of him than cradle his bloodied remains?

did the infant fight himself? did he age always at odds with himself; his halves never truly whole? he hopes he wasn’t, that he was spared the loss of self; the fear that one may be welcomed over the other.

who will he lose when the inevitable comes? when he’s ripped apart again? simon? or ghost? is it better to be cursed with choice just like his mother or live with an aftermath chosen for him? does it matter if in the end, he convinces himself there was nothing of him left to lose?

his head lolls to the side and the wild buck of his chest slows. he watches johnny beside him, his face lax with the rare peace of sleep; his cheek squished against the pillow, his lips pursed as long breaths escape him.

johnny. soap. never torn asunder but two all the same.

he carefully reaches out and ghosts his fingers along the jagged scar on his chin. even in sleep, he presses into his bloodied touch. he’s never fled his half-flesh, never shies away from his gore as it spills unbidden from his cleaved torso. he holds on where his mother let him go; cups his stomach to hold his insides in place and never minds the blood that drips through his fingers.

simon will never let him become his own solomon and cannibalise himself. he will never let him question which half of him has more value; which pieces he can afford to lose before he’s cast aside.

ghost’s soap. simon’s johnny. his.

whole, in any incarnation.

[sunmoontruth-stiles]

I need a completely rewritten teen wolf series with Derek Hale as the main character. I think it would heal me.

[keeps-ache]

i have a new hobby!! i listen to my playlist and say things like 'oh this goes hard' 'it just can't miss' 'it's so good, you have no idea' to my brother who cannot listen to it bc i am wearing headphones lmaoo

[frostybirdgoddess]

Darius and Ben in Chaos Theory but… make Darius relive the trauma of losing Ben.

[bulldagger-bait]

When it comes to hygiene tasks and self care with disability and chronic illness, its pretty much a constant case of: don't let perfect be the enemy of the good.

Basically: it's better to do something, than to do nothing at all.

TLDR: Just because you can't do something "properly" doesn't mean you shouldn't do it at all. Do it half-way. Do it shitty. Do it barely. Do it on a technicality. But do what you can. Just try, because doing something will help you.

If you don't have the energy to scrub your body with a sponge, just rub soap over your skin with your hands.

If you don't have the energy to wash your whole body with soap, just hit the places where sweat accumulates, or where you're smelliest.

If you don't have the energy to wash with soap AT ALL, just sitting in water is better than nothing. It will wash away dirt and oils.

If you can't bathe or shower at all, a warm wash cloth is your new best friend. If that's too much, then try bath wipes. They're a bit bigger than regular wet wipes, and a bit more heavy duty. They're designed to help keep bed ridden patients clean in hospitals.

If you don't have the energy to dry yourself after a bath or a shower, just put on a bathrobe and get into bed. If you don't have the energy to get dressed afterwards, just don't. It can wait until you can.

If you don't have energy to brush your teeth for two minutes, honestly, just a cursory scrub is better than not doing anything.

If you can't brush your teeth twice a day, brush in the evenings. It will help take away the build up of food from the day.

If you don't have the energy to brush AT ALL, honestly, just take a cloth and wipe the plaque off your teeth. Rinse with mouth wash after if you'd like. Something is always better than nothing.

If you can't floss twice a day. Try once. If that's too much, try a few times a week. If that's too much, try setting aside a day once a week as a goal. If you can't keep a schedule, do it when you're able to. Hell, I keep some floss next to my bed so that if I forget and don't have the energy to go get it, I can just reach over.

If you can't iron your clothes, don't bother. Wrinkles are fine. Wear jumpers over wrinkly t-shirts. No one will know, and honestly, most people won't even care. If it's really wrinkly and it's A Big Deal And It Needs To Be Ironed, here's my life hack. Step 1: take a spray bottle, and spritz the item of clothing (while you're wearing it is easiest) until it's lightly damp. Step 2: use a hair-dryer on the clothes until they're dry. It gets rid of creases like nobody's business, it's easier than lugging out the iron and ironing board, and you get to have nice toasty warm clothes afterwards.

If you can't fold your clothes, try just hanging them up. It's less commitment. It's quicker to do. Granted, you need to have the space in order to do this, but it is also good at helping you downsize, and lets you visualise exactly what you have.

If you can't put your clothes away, invest in a couple of laundry baskets, and then just keep your clean clothes in the baskets. You can then separate washed clothes into underwear, pants, and shirts baskets. You can just leave them like that. I'm giving you permission to never fold your laundry again if you can't. Just leave it unfolded. Who's going to care? Something is better than nothing. If you can, try to put those baskets into your closet so that you can keep the clutter out of sight, and give yourself a more restful environment.

If you can't separate your clothing out into different categories and wash them "properly" (whites, warm tones, cool tones, darks, delicates / switching between hot & cold washes / paying attention to laundry instructions on the label) then just don't worry about it. If you cold wash your clothes, colours won't bleed. Maybe gradually over the course of dozens of washes there'll be some changes in hue, but it's really not as high stakes as the One Red Sock In The Whites Turns Them Pink trope makes it out to be.

I've pretty much come to the point in my life where if a piece of clothing can't survive the washer and dryer, then it's just not meant to be. I colour separate my clothes, and if I have the energy/remember I'll take my bras and jumpers out of the washing machine to drip dry. But otherwise, I leave it to the universe.

If you can't separate out your recycling, then don't. If you have a large amount of rubbish you need to get rid of but the idea of separating it out properly is stopping you from doing so, then just don't worry about it. I know it's not ideal, but if you have garbage in your room/house and you need to get rid of it, please just get rid of it. Don't let the problem get bigger and harder to deal with. Don't let "doing something properly" get in the way of keeping your living spaces clean. Please. Give yourself understanding.

If you can't wash your dishes, get paper plates. Obviously, it's not ideal, but it is better that you eat food than skipping meals. It is better that you have a clean kitchen, rather than having dishes piling up and making it harder to look after yourself.

If you can't prepare meals for yourself keep making the tasks easier and easier. If you can't do recipes, then simplify. Use pasta sauce from the jar instead of making it. Eat canned soup. Buy food you can just stick in the oven. If you eat fish fingers and microwave veggies every night, it's better than not eating anything at all. It's better than having to fork out money on take-out. If you need ready-made meals, then get them. If you're literally just eating a raw cauliflower for dinner; 1) I see you, 2) me too, sis, 3) something is better than nothing.

These are the basic things you need to do every day to function as a person. They are your activities of daily living. Brushing your teeth. Bathing or showering. Using the bathroom. Getting dressed. Eating. Drinking. Sleeping. Keeping your environment clean. You don't need to do these things perfectly, but they need to happen in order for you to have a decent quality of life.

And it breaks my heart, because I know that so many disabled people can't do these things every day. I'm not saying this to guilt or judge, I'm saying that these are basic needs; you deserve these things. These things bring dignity. If a disabled person is unable to do these things, it diminishes their quality of life. It robs them of dignity.

If you need help to do these things, Its okay to ask for help. It's okay to need help. But if you can't get that help and you have to do these things by yourself -- or you just plain want to be independent and do it without help-- then don't hold yourself to standards you can't meet.

Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good. Doing something is always better than doing nothing. Even if it's not perfect. Even if it's not done well. Do what you can.

[seoulmatez]

which hq boy is the type to flirt with their ex and why is it matsukawa issei

[kerosene-saint]

queer history is very important to me and I love finding new things like websites and books and comics and photos and profiles and posts

[blairswldorfs]

one of the main things that I feel like 9-1-1 doesn't do right/could do better is related to how quickly they resolve any issues with the characters, like I'm on season 3 right now and I feel like the conflict with buck vs the 118 squad (just to take a specific example) could've been dragged out a little more to give it time to actually explore everyone's feelings and reactions and also the consequences

[masonjarsmoments]

Pls pls pls Lena Rybakina moodboard(s) and idc abt the colours I just love her sm <3

You are so right with loving her, she deserves all the love. And I hope she knows how loved she is as well. This was so much fun so thank you for requesting it

[lilgynt]

i am like wildly overestimating how well i could defend myself with like no self defense training with or without weapons on my person but id prefer that over thinking i cant like. build up enough strength to overpower someone or be scared to go to places alone

[brawlqueen]

PSA. / 2024 goals !

the reason i haven't been writing a lot is i've mostly been on my OC trying to play catch up on her lore and worldbuilding. you can find her in the pinned post . also i've been planning what i want to do for mizuki for 2024, and my interest very normal love for best girl only gets better each year. i just hope to do justice by her in my own way as i figure out what i'm doing post AI1.

as i'm canon divergent and i have a few things to talk about that i'll be hoping to capture or discuss hopefully some of this year that are parts of my mizuki's canon ! so i'll try doing it in uh, the most organized way because one goal i have at least for 2024 is better blog organization . it's too late to make a sideblog for musings / etc . THINGS I'LL BE DOING THIS YEAR . - focusing on catch up. unless a thread is requested to be dropped, please message me if so, i'll be continuing it. some i will drop for my own sanity, not because i don't want to write with you again! - seasonal / holidays asks will just be holiday asks with no specific content save for people i owe, ex: bubblez' kizuna or thane's trunks, etc. why? i think mizuki deserves to celebrate the holidays or anything remotely happy because while aiba is arguably as of now her best support system, let's be real, i genuinely want to find and work on any of her relationships because she's severely lacking in support. even from 2023. i'll try to stay more on the ball for again, my own sanity this year when i reblog them. - i will be writing my version of post-canon mizuki and child mizuki, that goes from her time before adoption from date, aka with shoko and renju which will be tagged appropriately because honestly mizuki doesn't know many reliable adult figures in her life, and it makes me very sad that she's arguably more mature than...most people save say, boss or pewter or hitomi etc. she deserves better! just because AI2 certainly isn't everyone's cup of tea, and it isn't mine in a LOT of ways, i still took stuff from it, and i don't think it's fair to halt mizuki at 12 forever just because we fairly have critique of NI / AINI and not let her grow up and experience a hopeful future and more bonds to fill the huge hole in her heart. let her be happy is the goal !

now i'm working on mizuki's post canon verse, as i've restarted aitsf 1 to move to aitsf 2, where i'll take a few things that i won't likely budge on unless you meet me halfway !

the verse title for anything post-canon and generally for 18 year old mizuki / teen mizuki or post explosion mizuki will be this verse tag!

__ 𝐕; 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍*ೃ༄ not compromising with just this; i'm taking back all the happiness i lost.

__

now onto her post canon details i do have figured out.

mizuki and aiba are partners. one thing that's consistent is through her time with date, that can still be a thing because they ARE a family, albeit i feel estranged granted the resolution route is canon, so mizuki never really got to bond with him, get her aphonia cured, vice versa, is aiba's care through time in his eye socket appreciating the girl's strength and endurance and intelligence in both games. you can have more than one partner, and until / if we have another game and mizuki possibly gets another partner and i debate the chemistry, aiba is mizuki's partner and aiba is generally mostly with mizuki, but that doesn't mean she isn't with date too. she can love more than one person. and both dates are equally dear to her.

mizuki was still experimented on until 3 years old at horadori institute, albeit she has blurry memories at best, and i debate if she should fully remember! one factor of her godlike superhuman strength. but she also is trained in most japanese martial arts she can get her hands on! she is NOT a clone of bibi, bibi doesn't exist whatsoever despite me enjoying her personality, even if i felt it was made to mimic mizuki herself, if others who have muses with canon bonds to bibi, please talk to me so we can plot it out if you keep her as part of your canon ! as long as we meet halfway i'm more than happy to work with you !

mizuki is still a rookie detective and psyncer at ABIS. in my canon, she actually looks to ryuki, also new, but older for advice and i like to think as dual protagonists that they should have been, they get to do some cases together! only if a ryuki is willing of course.

for now, she's working on small to medium cases with aiba. the explosion still happened that took her vision clean out. she does this because of the gruesome history she has, not wanting others to suffer the same kind of unimaginable trauma she has with both biological parents murdered in various means and i'm still debating whether tearer even exists. he likely will, and if people also have the other culprit's actions in their canon, please talk to me too and i'll work together with you on that !

mizuki still runs lemniscate and sunfish pocket. she doesn't have the heart yet to really let go of her neglectful biological father's companies, even if he didn't care for her in a way she needed. in time, i'll see how she feels about this, as i do plan for mizuki to continue her education, as the girl is extremely intelligent.

mizuki is still best friends with iris, but my mizuki also considers amame and kizuna two of her really close friends, but they aren't a sister to her like iris is. they're certainly caring of her, and she'd protect them with her life, but she isn't as close to them as iris, and all of them do hang out together from what i've seen.

my mizuki is a lot more skeptical for the kizunas out there, of lien. she isn't comfortable with his advances towards one of her best friends and generally is a lot more protective. that said, it's all according to people who write kizzy. naturally she's fiercely protective of iris, who now is someone who works for her too as the president of an entertainment company.

my mizuki comes from the MIZUKI ROUTE in terms of character development but NOT THE PLOT EVENTS . iris is not inhabited by so sejima. date and mizuki DO bond like a father and daughter. date unless a date talks to me, DOES cure her aphonia or it's hitomi herself like canon because hitomi is the mom she deserves imho. but i tend to take away the development of her character and their relationship otherwise i feel the date family bond is....pretty estranged or mizuki is MUCH more doubtful of date caring for her at all granted the routes and how she tends to get overlooked a lot.

basically i want to as one of i'm sure other mizuki-mun's, give her my best in my own way, at my own pace !

and those are my goals as i replay the games (again!) . i hope to keep developing mizuki and thank you for being so patient with me as always, everyone ! also kinda sorry for the long post but it was all necessary !

[jennyandvastraflint]

Vienna police is raiding the camp. At 11pm, they said the camp needed to be cleared in 15 minutes. They could NOT give a reason, even when asked multiple times. Not even 15 minutes later, they began pushing the people filming from the camp, bit by bit. They did not listen to protesters informing them they have the right to film, they were simply pushed further back. Apparently, the entire inner court was protest zone and they were not allowed to be in there. One policeman made racist comments about the students who did not speak German well, telling them to "go back to their countries then", but refused to repeat the statement when asked to. Multiple police officers (claimed they?) did not share their ID numbers, saying they didn't have it on them and didn't remember. Which, to my knowledge, is illegal. Not even twenty minutes after having started pushing everyone with cameras back so they couldn't see what is happening inside the camp, they told the students the entire COMPLEX was protest zone they were not allowed to be on - contradicting their earlier orders. Some protesters have been kept inside the camp for over an hour now, with no one being able to film inside. Outside, more student protesters were waiting, and they are now chanting outside university. Police brought WEGA, which are Austrian special forces usually used for raids and deportations (partly of children and at night), who are highly controversial. Police has still not let the students from inside the encampment go, for one hour and twenty minutes as i am typing this at 12:30am...

They keep kettling protesters in, and when asked for reasons, police just responds "I have my orders" or "I am just following orders". Which is exactly what the nazis said, just as a gentle reminder.

Stay safe everyone, and keep protesting! If they think they can silence us, we will just scream louder! Free Palestine!

[yuusishi]

I desperately wish the jjk light novels will be animated or have official manga versions someday cuz I need everyone to see Ijichi and Yuji's relationship in the "Summer of Ashes, Autumn of Dust" novel

[goodold-fashioned-killerqueen]

i need sometimes to recover from my whole world just go off with a bang yesterday, it was pretty traumatic ngl... i will be back in a bit