#let me know if u want smth else!!!
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ezekiel cuts his eyes over to the other in the shop, slow & deliberate movements as he cuts over fabric, moving sewing needles & thread off to his side table. the atmosphere is icy, & he is not pleased with their presence there. today, he thinks the sky has peeled open to reveal the nothingness behind their world ; he thinks the other only serves purpose as a void. " you look well. "
starter for @r3dblccd .
#r3dblccd#✞ — ic ˛ vers 01 . ❀ — jang ˛ ezekiel .#✞ — ic ˛ lett . ❀ — jang ˛ ezekiel .#✞ — ic ˛ pros . ❀ — jang ˛ ezekiel .#✞ — ic . ❀ — prose .#let me know if u want smth else!!!#ezekiel and adela are married tailor shop owners and theyre very obsessive with each other and when they find other ppl they want to add#but they are generally fairly cold to the public and they do not respond well to other businesses#theyre also royal fae who split off from their realms and found each other and they do NOT enjoy finding other supernatural beings
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rarishy kid? ✨🦋
rarishy!!!!! <3 i love this one so so so much and i adore their vibe so much!!!!! this one was such a fun one and i did a lot of playing with colors !!!!
#my art#art#digital art#artists on tumblr#mlp#mlp fim#mlp fankids#mlp fankid requests#design requests#rarishy#i imagine she probably got her cutiemark at a childhood pageant or smth? ofc up to interpretation but LOL#also it wasnt until i finished that i was like omg oops she looks a lot like flutters#but rarity is there with the mane being pink shifted purple and shes there in the eyes and the coat color being so light#i also imagine its her side that makes the feathers extra soft and fluffy#also the name that kept popping into my head was swan song. so do with that what u will#she DOES look a lot like flutters like i said so if you do want a different one just let me know ^^'#i also want to make sure i dont make anything too similar to anyone else that ive seen!!
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if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified
#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing#i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though#at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself#as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed#escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date#although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL#ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting#workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety#i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back#AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO#im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts#i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem#in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material#and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school#maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess#only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard#hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms#i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work#not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall#anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh#yapping
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me: keeps drawing random one-off fanarts from things that aren't currently big at all
also me: why no notes on my arte
#grateful for all of u lol#but why no notes !! lol !! i want attention i want engagement#i need to be LOVED and sharing my art is the vessel through which i ascribe my self worth...#it's like how if you have a long list of movies to watch ur still more likely to just.#watch some random movie you heard about 2 minutes ago that seems interesting. if u have spare movie time#bc it's lower pressure or smth#idk brother ! idk#im just chillin here in my cave drawing things apparently only i want to see and like maybe 5 other people#welcome to my cave#alligates says things#yo being an artist on the internet is genuinely awful. social media is not built for my delicate ass#even popular artists (i might technically be a popular artist) like i Know it sucks babe. i know#anyway 'no notes' generally in the past i could hit like. 500 ? with relative ease ? sometimes#yall i'm struggling to hit 100. why 7 reblogs and 35 likes. this is not the way#i'm a creator on the internet complaining about numbers ! not really gonna stop me tho#let's be honest whether or not i'm getting attention my ability to draw or not is contingent on. my own psychological ass. and little else#thank u for listening. it is my bedtime. goonite#if you read all these tags... idk. tell me the name of your favourite flower !
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kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
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(guy who wants to write so bad but has been too busy to properly do anything for his longer/more-plot-heavy fics voice) anyone want to mess around and give me a mini fic prompt
#the cryptid speaks#im lookin for some short and silly type prompts yknow smth fun to write fast#granted 'fast' could mean anything and even when i try for 'short' i often miss but let's Believe in me ok#anyways stuff from any inscryption x hc type world is welcome#my main lucky jumbo au; prophet!luke; honestly anythin else in that vein u want to throw at me#u are welcome to send prompts for other medias/crossovers as well jus know im less likely to do them#and as always i retain the right to not do any prompt bc per usual my muse cannot be trusted or coerced in any way
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#mod post#poll#if there’s smth else u want to see let me know. I don’t bite. I love to talk to people :)#it’s safe to put your hand through the bars of my cage :) trust
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trying to tell other ppl about OCs is so hard and embarrassing, like yeah here's my automaton guy that I've been calling Empty Mask, yeah I nearly cried over the thought of him collecting broken porcelain dolls the other day, yeah he sounds kind of stupid but he's actually kind of a tragic character if u get to know his story,,,,,,
#I JUST FEEL SO STUPID TRYING TO EXPLAIN CHARACTERS TO PPL 😭😭#they always think empty mask is a weird silly name and it IS weird and kind of stupid fjfkdl#but its like. the cracked exterior shell of an automata and he's missing stuff behind the face shell.... THERES MEANING TO IT 😭😭#also its technically a placeholder name until he figures one out for himself once he finds a proper identity for himself...#BUT THE SAME THING WITH WARDELL#''yeah this is my guy who turns into a dog. um. the fae cursed him sort of and now he works for them? but he doesn't want to.#and he's... yeah u know what lets talk abt smth else actually'' DHDJDKL BLEASE i wish i was better at it#actually i could be better at it but i dont want to put effort into telling ppl stories if they dont care#and i cant tell if they care or not so i just give them a half-hearted explanation to judge their interest#and then ofc bc i do such a bad job then they aren't rly interested fhfkdl#but i AM a good storyteller if i actually put effort and heart into it 😭 I've been told many times how engaging i am w storytelling irl#i just. get scared to put effort into it LMAO esp when these stories Mean smth to me#i can tell someone abt when i had to try to cross paths w a black bear easy peasy bc thats just a thing that happened#but it doesnt Mean anything to me beyond it just being somewhat interesting#my characters though .... aaougghhh#dandy.cmd#vent //
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vaguely aggrivating, following someone who's advocating for a movement that, while agreeing with aspects of it, leaves you with questions and concerns, so you ask about it, making clear that you agree with many concepts stated, but also that you don't understand other concepts but want to, and instead of explaining their movement or even mentioning resources to look for, they just kinda. dodge my questions while making it out like im just some kind of idiot who "doesnt get it" and in a later post, tries to make me out to be downplaying suffering by asking genuine questions.
this is about antipsychology. terfs keep your grubby fucking mitts off my post.
#'hey the posts im seeing look like they're advocating for the abolishment of psychology as a field of study/medicine...#...and yet there are many genuine problems that ppl face that only rly can be solved thru psychology. this concerns me. can i know more?#btw have a list of things i agree abt as well as my own experiences so u know im trying to be genuine!'#and the response being#'you clearly can't understand. smths not clicking in your head. let me discredit your concerns by focusing on one thing you mentioned and...#...nothing else. also ur clearly trying to justify my abuse and ask a victim to provide alternatives to their abuse'#fuck OOOOOOOFFF.#people experiencing abuse at the hands of the mental health system is not a reason to abolish mental health systems!!! its a reason...#...to ROOT OUT ableism and bigotry on every level of the mental health system so that nuerodivergent people can receive proper care!!!#next up: local tumblr user wants to abolish fucking DOCTORS as a concept for everyone; claims abuse apologism when faced with pushback#i don't see anyone claiming physical medicine needs to be abolished bc of abuse and there is VERY much ppl who have been abused by doctors#yes. i unfollowed them. but this pissed me all the way off.#fucking touch grass. jesus.
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#been sitting in my car for 30 min after clocking out then just making up errands to have an excuse to do smth#so i dont have to go home &be alone until i have smth to do again (go to work the next morning) :(((((#hate how u can go a whole day w out seeing someone &think ok maybe i can get a good nights sleep but then they show up#10 min before u leave for the day &then ur night is ruined bc u have trouble falling asleep#then have stress dreams when u do finally fall asleep#😞😞#ik its bc i havent confronted anything but i dont see myself ever doing it or rather initiating the confrontation bc idt it's my place#like what right do i have to disrupt what someone else has going to bring myself some ease#idk this probably doesnt make any sense i just need to vent bc i have cried in my car everyday after work for a month 😭#im ok ive just landed myself in a particularly shitty situation but only for me#everyone else is fine 🫠#&im a chronic overthinker so i have all these thoughts just swirling around &festering#im driving myself insane &then whenever im around.....the other ppl in this situation.....theres never a chance to let any of it out#im gonna explode at some point i know it &i dont want that to happen bc i dont want to be mean :(( but i also dont want to grow to resent#anyone bc this shit hasnt been properly dealt with :(((((#ugh .#changing of the weather isnt helping i feel like im 16 again in my dark bedroom driving myself insane 😭😭
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❛⠀i'm confident, you know. ❜ is he ? maybe he's lying. izuku certainly feels like he should be lying, because he had faced all-for-one before, and it's still— an image of terror. of destruction. of power and the endless greed to maintain it, to expand it by all means necessary, to squash any hope of opposing it. the thought of him, and what he stands for, and what he could do, has izuku's body seizes up in horror sometimes. that's when he usually has to remind himself how to breathe, and how to unclench his fists, and how to count back from ten again and again just to have some semblance of calm once more.
so what is he confident about ?
izuku's eyes lift up to the other, a smile mars his face — though it's softened by an exhaustion izuku feels would weigh him down for the next ten years. still, it is a smile. and it is earnest, and it is good. ❛⠀that we'll win this. your grandmother's will won't be in vain. ❜
@strdstd �� starter call !
#strdstd#i did read his about and i love it !!!!#i hope this is alright ?#but feel free 2 let me know if u want smth else!!!#izuku.#izuku; interactions.
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the cottage is small.
smaller than the mansion madge knew, with creaky wooden floors, cobweb bricks, and dusty furnitures. oddly, the kitchen is big enough to sit as many as ten people. or at least, the size of it had made her thought so, once. it isn't until later that abe told her that this was the house she'd intended to give to her son, a long time ago, if he'll ever get married. the son who grew to be a peacekeeper; the son who never came home. it's been left to rot ever since, or rather, it's been left for the vines to take over, for the weeds to eat up the front lawn. madge had not cared much then, the condition of the cottage; she was just baffled that abe had wanted her to use it for herself at all.
and, anyway - she could spew about the place she's been living in for as long as she wants, fact would still remain that the cottage is small. with only two bedrooms, two living spaces, one kitchen, and one shared bathroom, there isn't much room for one to escape to — unless you count the slowly-growing garden of strawberries and assortment of vegetables abe had encouraged her to grow in the backyard. perhaps one could easily hide behind the bushes there that she hadn't managed yet to sort, she barely knows how to, or between the fences that's half-wire and half-brick stones surrounding this secluded place. whatever it may be, there isn't much finnick odair, victor from district four, a member of the rebellion, could have gone without madge noticing.
and she does, as she steps into the house, the basket full of gardening tools are quickly set aside when she notices him attempting to sit up.
❛ don't move too quickly, ❜ she warns, crouching to his eye-level, as her own gaze sweep over his bandages. abe had said the pretty lad's lucky to be alive. their town's doctor had done all they could, of course. though ultimately, no one in two would be willing to host a rebel, let alone nurse them, with so many still somewhat a snow-sympathiser. so i thought i brought him here, abe had said, guilt marring her face as her glance drops away. he'll be gone soon enough, once he's up. i'll drop his meds every few days, when i could. just keep an eye on him, alright ? ❛ —you're badly injured. ❜
@mystictragedies — starter call
#mystictragedies#mystictragedies: finnick.#ok let me know if u want smth a little down the timeline versus right now#in any case. hello girlfailure madge undersee whos trying to garden and is probs struggling. bad#granted the house is not as dusty bc she does learn how to clean pretty quickly sdkjhfsjdf#anything else tho? its a Process.#madge.#madge; interactions.
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@undescension — souma.
"You..." Zarina stops in her tracks, trying to find where her hat fell, but it settles in front of another woman. She looks quite pretty, the golden-eyed woman notes internally. Though, her appearance here should be kept a bit more of a secret with her hair hidden but the moment her hat flew off and it was a moment of 'it is what it is' instead of any concerns. A small smile appears on Sokolova's face as she gestures at the hat at the other's feet. "May I have it back?" Her voice is smooth and soft, her appearance remains pristine and elegant. "I'm a bit lost. Do you know where we are right now?" Better be seen as a pretty flower with her straw hat in the middle of summer and cute white dress with sandals.
#❄ ― IN CHARACTER. ╱ you breathe by the sun,i breathe by the moon.#undescension#DANCES AROUND LIKE ITS THE BEST TIME#let me know if u want smth else!
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ive alwyas believed concerts / festivals are energy harvesting rituals. (good AND bad depending on the artist) but . good things??? that didnt feel entirely Good .
#i mean some sets werent Awful w that. some of tjem felt Neutral like a 'lets exchange energy'#but there was twp sets i attended n . it felt sp Negative and Bad like the artists (i think#or it cpuldve been tbe crowd) was just 'im going yo Drain this Crowd for my ow personal usage“ n it Sucked.#sws esp. that felt particularily Awful. n idk why :(#but it was fun. i just have two ppls Nwgative energy swirling aroubd my orbit. bc i actively went to heal two kids.#a girl in a panic n a boy freaking out / having hwalth issues.#and just man. that was a cool skill in itswlf. that i actively sought them out energetically and then just . went to help thwm#the poor girl i didnt even realise she was . Upset . like not to that degree.#so i just stood behind her w my hand on her back and Drained her negative feelings#i tried to replace it w something good / neutral. but . thats smth i still struggle with. is pushing my own energy intocppl Deliberately.#bc i didnt wanna make her worse . bc i waant feeling the best to begin with . but i Tried to just calm her down n lwt her know she was okay#n it helped i think. i could feel her slowly calming down and my legs started shaking which was my usual indicator ive picked up Mass#energy. n it had to be hers bc i was genuinely just focusing on her. it made me.sl fucming upset :(#n then the 15yr old boy#oh he was originally just a 'let me try n make u feel a lil bit better my dude' n then . it kinda became pbvious smth else was Wrong#and I Was needed to help him. n i did !!! he took his binder off (he passed as a 15yr old boy anyway. like there was nothing abt him that#was female. but the binder was causing health issues for him. so i did convince him to take it off for a few hours#he was sp fucking sweet n pure n i just . i wamma cry thinling abt how Pure he just Felt . like#damaged . he was def carrying some damage. but . i didnt care i just wanted to make sure he was okay right then#idk i jus had a feeling once he mentioned the vinder that That was an issue and he needed to take it off for a bit. im jus glad he listened#but yea. tjat entire festival was fucked. jus . Man .
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was gonna say smth else but this turned into a vent sorry everyone just ignore. typical weekend post on this blog u know how it is here we go👍
#wild ik so many ppl getting married meanwhile im over here struggling to convince myself my friends even care abt me or want me around#pathetic to admit but i cant even fantasise abt someone loving me bc im too insecure n emotionally unstable#my mind just shoots the idea down like whoa. unrealistic. ur incapable of expressing or receiving affection in any way that matters#no matter how badly u want to... and even if someone did well u wouldnt believe them most of the time#gotta get out of the fucking labyrinth first i couldnt inflict this shit on anyone i cared abt#but it makes me so desperately sad sometimes i dont know how im ever going to get out of this ive been trying for years and years#and im a little better at it snd i dont feel like this all of the time i know it just comes around and itll pass again#but im tired of being in so much emotional pain so frequently. and shouldering it so alone. theres such a disconnect between myself and#others and i dont know how to bridge that i don't know how to stop feeling so isolated and unwanted !!!!!! im trying so hard#it doesnt even bother me w relative strangers in my life like i dont get insecure at all around them i like meeting new ppl#bc theres like. no expectations i guess. like ik they dont care abt me personally and idk them well enough to do that either#and its fun but it doesnt satisfy needs that i have like i need to feel close + connected to ppl i need to care abt them + feel cared for#but as soon as i do start to care abt ppl it gets all tangled and i end up getting rly badly hurt over and over. thru no fault but my own#bc im constantly alienating myself and bc i struggle so much w shit like physical affection which is frustratingly rly critical for me!!!!#it wouldnt fucking matter if i didnt like or want affection ik some ppl are fine without i wish it worked like that for me#but nope instead i have to be constantly messed up over my complete fucking inability to express myself in any form#and ik it makes everyone around me so uncomfortable so it just becomes self reinforcing and eventually they drift and leave me behind#and i just do that over and over and over and every time ill tell myself ill do better ill try harder and itll get easier and someone will#and it happens again and right now im at the stage where the abandonment fear is starting to kick in which is awful n paralysing#and usually a precursor to actually being abandoned ehich is always my own fault bc i start behaving so erratically out of fear or defense#its self fulfilling and im trying. im trying so hard not to let it overwhelm me again and not to start acting out and freaking ppl out#and im coping with it okay i think but just hurts me a lot its all internal my rejection sensitivity is gradually ticking up and up#and argh!!!!!!!!! and some days im okay and some days its like this and i dont know what todo when its like this im so tired and in pain#its not even that bad today tbf. once im done typing this to get it out ill be able to do smth else and distract mysrlf for a bit#and then calling friends later too so exposure therapy innit. but itll be fun and i love them but i will probably also feel very bad after#or even possibly during but thats okay ill still manage fine im not going to let it interfere i dont want it controlling my fucking life#i am going to have a nice time and be okay despite it all. even if i do have to fucking battle this every day forever#and even if it stops me living my life to the extent i want and feeling as ok as i want i just have to come to terms with and be ok w it#and im not going to be!!! a fucking asshole abt it!!! i dont want to hurt anyone else thats the most important thing no matter how i feel#thr rest is all secondary and ik i cant help a few little bumps here and there but trying hardest to keep it separate its not negotiable
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Like it was never about me or what was best for me...I have to laugh because of how absolutely ABSURD it is
#and i let it HAPPEN#i genuinely dont know how else to react like.#stepping away and seeing it all for what it is in the light of day...with sober eyes...like wow. goddamn#like i just?? dont understand#'i told my friends about what you did to me' 'that's ur right' and then not even 2 weeks later 'i cant believe u told them..'#because i did it 'to make them hate you' like 1. then why did u do it. why did u do it then?#2. all i said was what you did.#then my friends said 'hey you deserve someone who listens to your boundaries that's not okay'#i shpuld be able to tell ppl how my partner treats me it shouldnt be smth i hide from them.#telling them was for me. but that didnt matter. your image did#well now they know. and now you know your actions have consequences.#it's just so infuriating. the amount i poured and poured and looking back it's like.#now i see so clearly it was all a fucking mirage it was never fucking real.#it's so unfair. i dont understand how it went on that long#not that he cares he gets to move on because he never really put in anything. no steps were taken no real truth was given#meanwhile i opened my life and bore my soul so.#like good for him ig he can just move on and get what he wants from someone new#and good for me because now i know more#but i still have to deal w this bullshit future i planned w someone who i now realized never wanted it really#like fuck. fuck#goddammit#so whatever i guess#and i hid SO MUCH because i KNEW how it would look#but to ME who had all the 'context' i didnt want them to just see what i told them#but i now realize the 'context' was all bullshit and i should not have been trying to protect someone who didnt even care enough to listen#to me saying no. god. i wasnt even asking for that much either.#i wasnt crazy. i wasnt acting like my dad. i was being a normal adult. it just crushes me.#because if i was in his place and i truly believed i was with my soul mate i would have simply done the hard shit.#but he didnt believe that ig so! now i know!!#yippee!!!!!
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