#let me know if I need to add anything

[melit0n]

One of the lines that caught my eye in Emergence was "So tell me what you meant by 'living past your half life'?" In chemistry, a "half life" is the time it takes for a substance to decay to half of its original mass.

Further, half lives are also prominent in physics, specifically, nuclear physics. It has the same definition—amount of time taken for a nuclei to half itself—but is, as its name suggests, focused on how much useful energy is produced via the decomposition.

This also links in with the later lyrics of "space dust for your fuel rods." Fuel rods are used in the control of a nuclear decay reaction within a nuclear power plant. This could be interpreted as either Vessel's lack of autonomy, or Sleep losing dominion.

If it's anything to note, "space dust" can also be radioactive.

So, with this all in mind, living past a half life is, in its basics, working towards rot. Existing as a dead man walking and overtly aware that you are.

To me, this could be in reference to Sleep. It's been emphasised that, while Sleep is one of the oldest Gods, He is a forgotten one; kept alive by rituals and those who are beckoned by song to follow Him. Aka, kept alive and powerful by Vessel.

Sleep has long since lived past His so called "half life," and, in toe, He is, therefore "well versed in the afterlife."

While I don't think it works as well, mainly because I consider the majority of this song to be Vessel having a go at Sleep, instead of vice versa, this could be applied to Vessel as a mouthpiece, too, posing the question of; how long until your humanity disapears? How long does it take until you pass your half life, and begin to speak and see only that which bloodless and broken creatures do?

How long until you aren't even you anymore?

And, when that change happens, which it will, eventually, will you emerge and become "someone new," or stay as you were?

[venethus-flytrapped]

i've had this post rotating in my head for like five hours. SO YOU KNOW selfship uplifter post. and obviously; proship/comship/problematic shippers DNI EVER

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shoutout to selfshippers who use literally themself! i know it may be silly to shout this out because there's either more or less "personal" selfshippers out there, but i personally don't see a lot of that. of course, i'll never hate on someone who doesn't use "literally" themselves, but i feel like ocs tend to be more popular or widespread! which is totally cool and great and i am in you guys' corner forever, but i wanna shout out people like me. because sometimes i end up feeling lonely or a little out of place or awkward because i kinda really outgrew my oc/cc phase. it gets a little awkward sometimes and i get those lingering fears of being judged or that how i choose to selfship would be looked over as opposed to an oc— again, that's not to diss anyone, it's more of a silly worry that others may be able to relate to.

shoutout to the selfshippers who it's "them" to every detail— from their personalities, to their appearance, to their preferences, to their flaws and "issues" (re: something the selfshipper struggles with). to the people who selfship using themselves because they themself want to feel special, that using themself in their most accurate form or presentation makes them feel more loved. you are always valid, and your f/o will always love you.

shoutout to selfshippers who portray themselves down to the very detail. that being hairstyle/hair-type, their appearance in terms of their body whether that is their weight and being big or small. or maybe you're a hairy femme or a smooth masc. big applause to selfshippers who get down little details like markings, how they smile, their eye/nose/lip types. much love to the selfshippers who more or less embrace "themself" in their portrayals.

shoutout to the selfshippers who selfship using themself, but it may not be super 1:1 of how they present themselves irl, and yet, it's still them! maybe it's dressing yourself in a style you can't do/have no interest in doing/can't afford to do. maybe it's you with alternative hairstyles opposed to the one you always have irl/hairstyles you can't always do. maybe you have an alternative hair color! to selfshippers who add on body modifications despite not having them irl because of any reason despite you always wanting one. shoutout to the selfshippers who, it's more or less them, but maybe their portrayals use their different names the selfshipper themself uses. that it's basically them, just under a different name. shoutout to selfshippers who, it is them, but they're not human! maybe it's a fursona, monstersona, etc— them in a different form!

shoutout to the selfshippers who use literally themselves to cope. be it handling their trauma, disorders or disabilities, illnesses— people who want comfort for those things and implement them more personally onto this accurate presentation of themself to feel that love from their faves. that they don't use a different portrayal for these personal struggles because maybe they want to imagine their fave loving them, not some stand-in or someone else that isn't them.

shoutout to selfshippers who use literally themself because they are saddened by the idea of their fave loving someone that isn't them. that the idea of them liking someone who isn't them because of how they look/act makes them feel really upset. maybe you were cast aside for that. that selfshipping using their literal self makes you feel appreciated beyong belief. that it might actually help you grow to appreciate yourself more and maybe even get better in places where you struggle— maybe using yourself helps you get better mentally or physically of emotionally.

there may be so many other reasons, but these were the ones that came to mind. if you have another reason, you're always very valid. your f/o wouldn't love you less for being you in your most "true" state, as we'll say. they wouldn't prefer you over some heavily altered version of yourself or how people would idealize you. they wouldn't prefer if you used an oc over you. they love 1000%, and nothing will change that— as long as you're happy.

[sketchy-tour]

HELLO HI HELLO I AM!!! RECOVERING CURRENTLY!!!!

So I haven't posted in a small moment and planned to get myself going again soon but right now I am recovering from an accident (I won't get into the nitty gritty) that has left me quite shaken. FIRST OFF I AM OKAY! Minor injuries so nothing alarming I am physically fine besides being sore for a bit and some scrapes and bruises that are still healing, including my arms which is making drawing a bit difficult. I'm slowly getting better but cant really draw for long periods and honestly I might not draw much for a bit till I feel better both physically and mentally. its the mentally part that might take some time. But I'm resting, rest assured!

ANYWAY this is more just an update cause I know i've been a lil absent. ESPECIALLY after this accident. I'm not abandoning the blog by any means, def still check on tumblr but couldn't seem to muster the energy to interact with much at the moment as my brain is a little rattled up.

I hope yall are all okay! I hope your days are bright and yall are taking care of yourselves!

I promise I'm doing what I can to take care of me!

[pumpkinnkidd]

leafpool should get to say the line not grey wing the ass

[anastacialy]

tracked down this clip just because of this post! have jokes from skizz and scar

[siderealxmelody]

Kaden leaned against the tree watching them. He could feel the boy's rage from here, that swirling darkness that had not been honed or shaped. It would run him ragged and destory him if he didn't harness it.

He let Natalia take the lead it was her son after all. His eyes sliding to the dark, he supposed his and Elianna's time alone was done now. With the months they'd had - something in him had loosened. Even if that rage hadn't gone away, it didn't feel like everything he was now.

He wondered if she had learned anything new or the Wardstone. If Isaiah had learned Creon was back, the archipelago free from Achlys taint. If he'd have to stop Isaiah from killing the male or if Anaxia had already gotten there.

He exhaled and took one step closer, he should probably try to understand where Xaden's head was. Even if he really just rather be with Eloanna, why couldn't this younger generation give him just a few minutes before getting themselves into trouble?

Xaden struggled against the magic, the pull of it. It wasn't a thirst for magic, but everything else. A part of him he'd only played at.

His emotions were dulled, he was growing...bored? He kept far from his siblings, even if he knew they worried, could feel it now.

But the thoughts he had when he was around them, when the dark monster in him rose its head...

He could not act on them, could not allow himself to hurt them. Even when whatever this was, this infection whispered how much calmer his life would be.

How much more peaceful it would be without their constant nagging.

Violet had tried to be there, had pushed and pushed. He supposed it was only mercy for her that she had to go back to school.

Samara only helped curb some of the blood lust roaring in him. He stared at the cliff side, feeling the tug of the earth below him.

The magic there that called to him, to use to bend everyone to -

"Enough hiding Xaden."

He didn't turn, didn't move as his mother grab his chin to make him look at her. His magic reacted before he could stop it. Slamming into her, she only rose an eyebrow at him.

"Are you done having your tantrum? Good. Come."

"How did you find - Orsus?"

"Sygael."

Orsus had stepped back, but had followed him. Had stood with him even but even they were afraid. What had he become for even they to be afraid of him?

What monster was he now to scare the Wyrdweaver?

@siderealxmelody

This. This was one of the very things Natalia hadn't wanted to happen, all those years ago. So many things done to keep a moment like this from ever taking place, so many hopes--foolish and stupid though they might have always been--

Her fingers dug into Xaden as she maintained her grip on his chin, the darkness twisting inside of her, like it was alive. It had always felt that way, of course. Sometimes louder and screaming, flooding every bit of her veins, making it impossible to think of anything else. And others so silent it was almost like Natalia could forget it was there. At least for a moment.

But it always slithered under the surface.

And now, her eyes narrowed, her grip tightening, she shoved it down again. Natalia wasn't here to focus on her darkness.

❝ We're not doing this, Xaden. You are not a child, so don't act like it. ❞

~

His own dark eyes, mirrors of his mother's, narrowed right back at her. ❝ Sgaeyl shouldn't have said a fucking thing, ❞ he nearly growled, feeling that twist inside, that darkness that wanted out. Needed its outlet like Xaden hadn't ever felt it before.

Like his very skin was itching to just unleash all of it. Until the entire fucking world fell apart, and every single living thing--

His fingers curled into tight fists at his side as he yanked his head from his mother's grip, taking a step back. It was all Xaden felt like he could do in that moment, to keep pushing it back. Pushing it down.

But it felt like, no matter how much he tried to do that, only the opposite occurred. And it grew louder, stronger.

Anger and rage seemed to be the only things that could find their way inside of him, fueling that slithering darkness, the power that told him he could have all he wanted--

Xaden shook his head, body tense as he turned away from her.

❝ Go away. ❞

[shenzi-hemlock]

hey girl(?)! I love your posting of religious content and that you are unashamed to be religious even amid such a secular society. I was wondering where you stand morally speaking on homosexuality/gender politics? I know it's a complex issue within the scope of religion but I would love to hear your thoughts on it as someone who is religious but doesn't necessarily have an easy time processing how religion should interact with societal issues in general?

Sorry for not answering this one right away, I’ve been mulling over some topics and readying myself to explain them. Ok, here we go!

Thank you! I try first and foremost to be a Christian and let everything else follow. For some people, that puts them off and they would rather not be around me. It happens and it’s fine. I can’t force them to be a Christian or to like me.

So to have that lead into the main topic here, where do Christians stand on homosexuality/gender politics?? Well it’s very clearly detailed in the Bible. Homosexuality is a sin, period. There are a lot of people that will claim that the Greek word for “homosexuality” isn’t talking about two adult men but is warning against an adult man sleeping with a young boy. This particular translation has been debunked on more than one occasion and it does mean “homosexuality” as in two males having sexual relations with each other. The Bible does not endorse pedophilia but verses talking about two men laying together or men giving themselves up to unnatural and sinful desires are very loud and clear that homosexuality is a sin which goes against God’s design. God instituted marriage (and this all sexual acts) to be within the covenant of one man and one woman. No more, no less, no different.

As for gender politics, I’ll put here what I put in my other post, we are fearfully and wonderfully made. God, the creator of the universe and its planets, the God who composed physics and taught His galaxies to dance, the God who cultivated the tallest tree and tiniest flower, He knit you in your mother’s womb. He knows everything about you. Every fear, every joy, every lie, every truth. And He loves you. God does not make mistakes.

So just based off this, I can very firmly conclude that we are not to mutilate ourselves in order to feel better in our skin. We already are in the best body we will ever have. Specifically, transgender is a mental illness and it needs to be treated as such. Depression, anxiety, bipolar, schizophrenia, all of these are treated as a mental illness. Could you imagine how worse off all these folks would be if instead of getting actual medical and psychological care, they were instead told there was nothing wrong with them and to not only continue living a delusion but actively encouraged to feed into it?

Suicide rates in the transgender community are extremely high. That is a direct consequence of encouraging that mental illness instead of directing them to the proper clinics/physicians to get the help they need.

So we’ve got both of those out of the way. Next, I should touch on what you said about being religious and how that interacts with societal issues.

I am a Christian because I believe that Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. None come to the Father except through Him. I am not a Christian because my parents expect it or because it’s just how I was raised. I have a personal relationship with Christ in which He called me by name and saved me. Jesus shapes the way I look at not only myself but every other person on this planet. He informs my every decision and directs me to follow His Word. If you agree with this, then that leads to my next point.

Jesus is our priority in life and everything else comes after Him. And when I say everything, I mean truly, absolutely, *everything*. Jesus comes before my parents, before my siblings, before my husband, before my friends, before everyone else and everything else. That is how I view societal issues. Jesus comes first. Because God is a God of love, that will inform and direct me in how I interact with the world at large. Sometimes, love is tough and wants the best for you. Sometimes people don’t like what is best for them. Sometimes, a lot of times, they want what is easy.

Putting Jesus first is hard. It’s an everyday challenge. But when I put Him first, that allows me to look at issues like homosexuality and transgenderism through the lens of Christ. It is a sin to lust after someone of the same sex just as lust is a sin for people of the opposite sex. It is a sin to try and permanently change or destroy your body and say that God was wrong. You do not live a life led by Christ and decide to mutilate yourself.

But there is always hope. Christ is King. He has won. No matter what you have done, no matter how evil you think you are, no matter how lost you feel, no matter how much you have put Him down, Christ still wants to have you home. And so do I.

[ack-cough]

Have Meowsabeau or Mewrabelle tried using Body Craft on themselves? How has that worked out? Especially Meowsabeau, with his history of being stuck in a body he didn't want.

I definitely couldn't pass this Ask up but I've also haven't had a Mewabelle centric post in a while!!! Please forgive TwT

Ms "I don't want to change, I'm happy with who I am" Maribelle. Is taking it as well as you expect

⚠️NONSEXUAL PARTIAL NUDITY, PANIC ATTACK AND DESTRESS WARNING ⚠️

(I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE I DONT WANT TO CHANGE -)

She's normally able to cope with the fictional horrors she already adores, being able to resinate with the wolf men and cursed beings more than ever!

But I cant say every night goes well.. who knew having your body and mind changed against your wants, by the god you devoted your life to no less! Would upset you a lil bit

[enrapture]

[delicatepointofview]

gonna have to deal with people missing the point of louis singing 1d songs in festivals... don't get me started on the other covers

[moeblob]

MerMay featuring Sascha and Reynold this time

Sascha (the demon lord in canon who can shift into a very large dragon) gets a crab like scheme. And also Large. And also he can keep his horns as a treat. Reynold gets a slightly seal-based color scheme in honor of a selkie because of his form shifting/gender bending in canon. He asks a goddess to turn him into a woman and then later Sascha turns him back to a man/his true form. Not even remotely selkie-related really, but changing forms and what-not.

[catwouthats]

Southerners: I can barely fucking stay alive. The system sucks.

Conservatives: omg how cute >_< This is why we are going to not do anything about your situation and instead say that more people should be like you 0w0

Southerners: Did you not hear me? I’m living paycheck to paycheck! That’s not fucking cute!!

Conservatives: Cutie >_<

Southerners: *turning to city/coast/suburb leftists* Okay, y’all have energy and time. Can you listen to me?

Privileged/white/new “leftists”: Hell no. You elected officials that are terrible, so you are a shit person too.

Southerners: But the system’s fucking broken! Voting doesn’t work! And those laws affect and hurt the people here the most!

Southerners: *turning to the (mainly) bipoc leftists of cities/coasts* Can you please talk some sense into them?

Bipoc/tired/old leftists: Well, they won’t listen to me unless it easily makes them look like a really good person. So this is gonna take a while…

[pinazee]

First season wrap up:

Okay, to start, i should mention my general opinion on first seasons for shows, especially cable shows, is not to read too much of it as canon. The writers, producers, actors- everyone- are all trying to figure out what works and what doesn’t, so i give them latitude, particularly when it conflicts with later seasons. That being said, i do enjoy jumping through the hoops to make it all fit haha

So heres a few leftover notes i had as i revisited the eps to rank them:

I bet part of Lassie was craving the father figure in Henry, since we find out later his own father passed away when he was quite young. I wonder if thats part of the reason why he became a cop, as they are portrayed as the protectors and in the 80’s they were mainly men (i don’t really remember if he states his reason later, i suspect he did and im just not remembering). So when Henry didn’t meet up to the expectation he had in his mind, i bet it hurt a little more as it reminded him of what he lost :/

I think the other reason Shawn plays dumb so much, besides hiding his genius so ppl believe hes psychic, or for laughs, is because its how he gets people talking. Like in Shawn vs. the red phantom, he purposely guessed the wrong room number so the boys would correct him. My apologies if someones pointed this out before, i haven’t combed through the internet for everyone’s theories 😬 i only now noticed. I’m not the quickest at picking these things up lol

If i had to guess, Shawn didn’t want to be a cop for halloween, he probably wanted to be something star wars related to go with Gus’s Lando. So i wonder at what age Shawn stopped trying to please his dad. But also, why didn’t his mother ever stand up for him?? I’ll come back to her later -_-

I somehow missed it the first time, but shawn clearly asked Gus to come to the dinner and Gus even points out that it was a big deal for henry to reach out. Soo, yeah, shawn obviously didn’t wanna be alone with his dad, and even henry seemed nervous about it as hes pretty drunk.

Shawn has a right to be afraid of pointy things, his dad hid his easter eggs under glass when he was 6! Not to mention he later gets stabbed 3 times! (Also its just a legitimate fear???)

So far the list of Shawns knowledge (things i wouldn’t expect an average person to know) includes (beyond the obvious observational skills, deductive reasoning, reading people (poker), and all things police (marksmanship, police codes, etc.)):

Incredible spatial and physical reasoning skills (knowing how much money could fit in the duffle bag, knowing to rotate the water pitcher to catch the reflection from the tv)

Kurt Vonnegut (well, I didn’t know who he was at least)

How to spell aggiornamento (and probably all words because of his photographic memory)

Handwriting expert

Casually spoke and understood german

Has every road he’s driven mapped in his brain, and likely all of Santa Barbara

Familiar with paint (enough to know to mix latex enamel for no messy drips)

Animal tracks (i went back and forth on this but ultimately decided he must have known what to look for)

And heres a list of Gus’s niche interests:

Forensics

Spelling bee

Safe cracking

Historic rifles

Comic books

Astronomy (even though he was going to the planetarium for the girl)

Law

Local tennis

Online poker

Lastly, Ive decided instead of ranking them, im putting them in tiers. I feel like too many of them are hitting at the same level and I can’t differentiate:

Sweetest, Juiciest Golden Pineapple Tier

Scary Sherry, Biancas toast (ohmygod i just got the biancas toast 🤦🏽‍♀️)

Blue Psych Logo Tier

Weekend warriors

Forget me not

From the earth to starbucks

Poker? I hardly know her! (Sorry @pineapple-psychic!)

Pepto Bismo Pink Tier

Spelling bee

Pilot

She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me oops hes dead

Who ya gonna call?

Shawn vs the red phantom

Oops Canadian Flag Tier

Cloudy with a chance of murder

9 lives

Game set muuurder

Speak now or forever hold your piece

Woman seeking dead husband, smokers okay, no pets

[mylove-thresher]

piss coloured piss baby

[darkestgraves]

friend makes a rape joke once to friend who rapes you while laughing at you pipeline

never stops after you gasp at the shock value of it, because he loves how uncomfortable you look. laughs at your awkward silence.

and every joke gets more and more detailed. joking about how he'd wrap his arms around a whore's neck, force her to take it, watch her go limp. he watches your reactions, knowing you're imagining it.

of course, imagination is not enough.

[mizamelon]

"Ohhh, I will ruin you. It's a habit, I can't help it..."

It's still Valentine's Day over here so, uh, consider this a gift I suppose