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ummahhhuhhh · 11 months

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I wanna be crazy I wanna lose my shit I wanna be manic without the panic I wanna blow up I wanna become a star I wanna be God I'm already God

I want to rip my organs out see what I'm made of I want to bring myself back to life I want to fucking kill myself I want to bleed just everywhere

I want to bash my brains into the wall I want to feel rapture I want to go to heaven on earth I'm already close

I want to be high all the time with or without drugs I want to be absolute bliss; euphoria.

#let me die let me die #let me die or let me take all the drugs im so #i would literally chop off my left nut for some alcohol and nic and narcs and speed #and probably heroin #ketamine #just to see what it feels like #i already love opioids #thats a dumb thing to say but is it really?#im fuckijg losing my grip with reality anyways #all this stress has made me hypo(?)manic #or some shit #why do i feel like my brain is ribbon unraveling #i forgot what it felt like to see this way #its just different #i prefer to be detached from reality like this #less tethered #maybe ill do something crazy #i know i cant because my system keeps me to the ground but without thwm i know id kill myself just for fun #or something #or nothing #maybe it means nothing and i mean nothing #but the good news for all of this is that im so detached it really doesnt matter #my system can go fuck themselves for giving a shit #if im nice i wont attempt on our life #im feeling generous #even gods die

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legopenne · 2 months

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Anyone else weirdly disappointed that Gwen didn't get inked? I saw one theory specifically of Ink5oul signing their name on her that I particularly loved.

#maybe I just want Gwen to be forcibly made less proper #maybe I wanted the toxic Gwen/Ink5oul romance #Gwendolyn Bouchard #Gwen Bouchard #Ink5oul #TMagP #there's still time for her to get tatt'ed #there's still time for her and Ink5oul to get forcibly tethered together #honestly I don't even see romance for them; Gwen's just too much of a lesbian to me

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witsserviceablesubstitute · 4 months

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What if I said this scene with Edwin:

Is visually referencing the first piece of queer cinema, Salomé (1923):

What then?

#edwin payne #dead boy detective spoilers #the dead boy detectives #dead boy detective agency #salomé #based off oscar wilde's work no less #they do tether edwin to his historical context in these ways #i don't believe I'm off the mark #in any case i saw the connection and that's all that matters 😅#right before he finds out simon was also a queer boy too #the despairing and beautifully tragic queerness of the 1910s and 1920s #(i mean 'beautifully tragic' in a fictional sense)#(an aching appeal to be seen as human)

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basileusdraws · 4 months

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Some early days design stuffs for my favourite crab kids :)

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turnaboutsisterzarchive · 7 months

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we could be so carefree

#they/it for needletail #they/she/he for alderheart #needletail #alderheart #a vision of shadows #avos #warrior cats #procreate #ibispaint #kennedy art #ive been thinking about their dynamic a lot recently #theyre soulmates to me #not necessarily in a romantic way mostly in that theyre tethered together whether they like it or not #you have to have a very high iq to understand the alder/needle dynamic #appreciate alderhearts tabby markings i busted my ass on that. WITHOUT A REFERENCE NO LESS!#its important to me that alderheart takes after her mama

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sysig · 6 months

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Homesick (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Helix #ZEX #DAX #Hhgghghhhh ;;;; ♥#Have I mentioned I love them lately #ZEX recognizing DAX's voice in Dexter is /so/ good ugh #For so many reasons! The implicit trust! How Dexter is able to manipulate him even unwittingly just how much of an effect he can have!#But also of being able to be honest with him in a way that he won't let himself be with other humans because well they're human #ZEX is terrible in many ways that I love him for deeply <3 His biases let him self-sabotage so easily haha #He has so much to unlearn from VUX propaganda even being as open-minded as he is! Well also in part Because of his open-mindedness lol #Fetishism rather ♪ Seeing humans as a monolith and getting so hopelessly swept up in his attraction across the board #He's a complex individual with a long history rooted in what and who he is! I like him very very much!#His biases cut both ways of course - since Dex has a familiar voice he of course must be a VUX! And here he could be ;;#Someone who just by the nature of his familiarity is safe but to actually listen to and validate him ugh ;;♥#The thing that kills me the absolute most is that Dexter /could/ give this to him - but won't #He has his voice his cadence his accent his way of speaking - and yet #At least if DAX was actually here he could offload some of his emotions properly rather than bottling everything up #ZEX keeps a lot of things to himself :( Like he can't bear to burden anyone else with them - or else his pride gets in the way haha #He's so condescending towards humans to his own detriment <3 #At least if he had DAX he'd have more-or-less an equal - someone he could share his pain with ;;#As well as the comfort of validation and something - anything - to keep him grounded and tethered to his life #Comfort is just as precious a commodity as information - allies - weapons - supplies! It's all about balance <3

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celluzu · 1 year

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What do we do when Quackity logs on and he's not wearing Tilin's ribbon anymore.

When he finally notices the red bow tied uncomfortably tight around his arm and doesn't know it's because he never wanted it to come off. When he sees it as a nuisance, scrunching his sleeve up. When he tugs the string off and lets it fall to the ground, rubbing the phantom feeling from around his arm.

He doesn't know who he is or what he's doing, but he knows he only looks back for a moment as the wind carries it away.

#or #in a much less angsty hopeful tone maybe he will keep it #maybe it feels more like a tether to his old self in a comforting manner #maybe he tugs at the ends while hes trying to figure everything out #either way #qsmp #quackity #tilin

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cakeyouareoh · 4 months

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peter’s name really is extremely fitting to both his character, and his character’s role.

#I love it when character names reflect their role in a story #love him; hate him; be indifferent towards him; you can’t deny that Peter is the foundation the show hinges on.#the “bedrock” you might even say :>#he’s walter’s emotional and mental anchor (you see in the beginning of season 4 how unable walter is to function anywhere out in public)#without peter to tether him to reality; he is much less mentally sound and more emotionally volatile #I would say he becomes olivia’s too; something you can really start to see in the back half of season one #and continuing on through the successive seasons #my sister likes to joke that he’s her emotional support peter; or secondary ESP if you will XD.#and I know this all kinda gets flipped on its head in season five #peter and olivia kind of have a role reversal #and it’s really interesting #because peter is just really steady and reliable at his core. but he’s also a lot like his father especially when it comes to family #something I think he denies and then really starts to realize about halfway through season four #also maybe I’ll expand on this later but I really think you can see almost the exact point when he wholeheartedly #forgives walter for what he did #sorry for the essay in the tags #fringe

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deadpanwalking · 10 months

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Asking this as a second gen Russian American Jewish person, how did you get your family to rethink their Zionism? I'm fighting for my life

Didn't have to lift a finger. My old man was a refusenik, but chose not to move us to a country that was supposedly a haven for Jews but still had compulsory military service—he was disgusted with the Communist regime chiefly because of the nationalism, and that's at the core of conscription, even in times of peace. I think he gave up whatever sentimental attachment he still had to ~Hatikvah back when the extremists killed Rabin in '95.

#since my mom passed he's been less tethered to the russian jewish community and is actually making friends through his activism #i don't need to tell you how insular we are and it can be very isolating for someone with his politics #he spent the past 30 years on the defense at family gatherings for even broaching the notion of a two state solution #but this past year he's found friends his age who have invited him into discussions about a one-state reality #i guess my roundabout answer to your question is to get your folks to make more friends outside the community but like.#my mom literally had to die before it could happen so 😬#in any case i had little to do with it apart from being a sounding board—that man won't listen to me #anonymous #assbox

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jorvikzelda · 2 months

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cat will fix me. convinced of this

#i think of him every second of the day #in fact i think i need to think of him less because my intrusive thoughts are starting to twist it against me lol #but also… wah. ive been feeling for an eternity that all i really need is a little animal company #i think it’ll do me good to have another living creature in my home. especially one as cuddly as Him #(he wants all of the attention always)#some company. some comfort. something to give me smth to take care of outside my own disastrous body. something to keep me tethered #i hope im not too dissociated on the day we move. him being in my apartment is smth that could feel So fake and i want to process it.#i want to put him down and let him out of the cage and feel that it is real #z talks #i think itll do him good too. it won’t be what he’s used to but he loves me i know it. and i will spoil him with so much attention and love #and care #my mom is not good at having cats. in fact i don’t think she likes cats very much at all

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skitskatdacat63 · 3 months

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One of the assignments for my online classes is to create a timeline of "digital media" you've been into. Bro do you know how much stuff I've been into over the course of my life 😭

#imagine putting: ff. net. wattpad. ao3 #if i was a stronger man I would #then again for my one class i made a presenatuon abt fandom......#so brave of me icl 😭😭😭😭 twas very revealing #but im rlt unsure about this #bcs i dont think it means fandoms obviously #but like ive been into sooo much stuff its hard to condense it #one time i made a fandom timeline of ONE year and it was so filled up #i jump around a lot less now cause im tethered to my current fandom but #before that. i had so many fandoms per year #but hmmmmm pondering.#i guess it would be like. twt tumblr ps4 genshin etc???? or?#catie.rambling.txt

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bunnihearted · 5 months

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i've been too distant for a few days/a week (????) and now everyone hates me probably......

#idk i just kinda glitched and fell into a mild dissociation period O.o #im only now starting to get out of it and become less faded and more solid (this makes sense to me lol 😭)#but i havent replied or interacted with anyone p much at all so now im like #what if everyone forgot me bc i havent been capable of being social at all? 😭#i still dont feel like im back to my 'normal' state. which still isnt fully alive or present but #idk i get these phases now and then where i feel like im not connected or tethered or real and everything's fuzzy and weird #blep :p #im just sad bc i really like sm ppl & blogs on here but then i dont interact for sooo long and then im like idk :((((

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unprotectedmechs · 7 months

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for anyone wondering: i have zero other social media. if my blog or this site go down that’s it forever and i’ll finally be free

#this app is the only thing keeping me tethered to the social internet and it’s becoming less and less of a fun place to be #im stuck here like a barnacle so if the ship goes down i go down with it

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raayllum · 1 year

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really mulling over the likelihood of what i detailed here (amid a different set of speculation for s5 perhaps) of my “rayla destroying and saving callum” pattern going 1) destruction first (like freeing the moon fam) and 2) salvation second (breaking him free of possession, maybe in s5 or even in s6) rather than the CHET engine of 1) salvation first and 2) destruction second. both allow for their own Tragic Cliffhangers, but with the arc decidedly split down the middle rather having both presumably crammed into s5 or stretched out through to s6. also means that book 6: star(?) can have the possession plot line (literal agency vs destiny with those same sweet rayla-aaravos parallels and duality), explorations of stella, and the cube (which is decidedly a secret of aaravos / linked to deep ancient magic and understanding in Some way) unencumbered, as well as possible parallels of viren and soren trying to bring claudia home with everyone else working to bring callum home as well. y’know, for the Foils

#flinging my spaghetti at the wall yet again lads #s5 speculation #s6 speculation #tdp theory #the dragon prince #improvise adapt overcome #tdp #s5 spoilers #predictions #like i think if the key isn't tethered directly to aaravos' prison the exchange could still work but it'd be decidedly less tight #cause while i do lean towards callum having something to do with aaravos getting out bc Freedom Associations #it can be more specific to their general ideological thematic conflict without overlapping in that way?#at least perhaps not that directly #it still feels like not everyone who wants to be free is gonna be Freed tm like #someone's freedom or safety is still getting willfully sacrificed but. hm. we shall see #tag ramble #theme: freedom #cube hostage exchange theory #adjacently #tdp spoilers #mutual savlation theory #also adjacently #cause on the one hand. the 'terrible things for love' has typically been Protection #which the exchange fits better in some ways. but Also dark magic. which fits the coins #and jack did imply callum might dabble in dark magic again pre s4 so like. THAT WOULD TRACK

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goldenkid · 10 months

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hi guys. has anyone ever thought about an au where martha stayed with 10

#she so wouldn't because it's out of character but like.....if he persuaded her #and she left and he appreciated her this time and she abandoned her family....#maybe she's not the doctor's doctor maybe this time the doctor chases her and keeps her tethered because she's been so strong and maybe she #-makes him promise to take her back to that same second. back to her family.#but she's walked the earth for a year she's seen hell too but the difference is she can run away.#and she IS going to go back she IS going to take care of them #but she has a time machine. she can run away so far.#maybe she had a year away from the doctor and now it's so much less about him #and more about her escaping #maybe being a doctor across the stars. trying to protect people to save them to practice because she's so scared that she can't save her-#-family. that the damage is irreparable.#and she's so angry at the doctor but also they make such a good team #and this time he's the one worrying about her #yeargh...#and then CAPTAIN JACK IS THERE. just cause i <3 the tenjackmartha dynamic #doctor who

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tough-n-dumb · 1 year

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turns out i have an aching soft spot in my heart for characters with trauma who wear gloves as armor to hide behind, keeping them safe from a world that could hurt them again but also from touching that which makes it brighter

#if it wasn't clear i'm talking about cornelia and kaz #honorable mention of eli and inej who i love just as dearly and who wear their armor in different ways #inej with her sick fucking knives #eli with his... ass-less chaps?#no his is his medicine #keeping him tethered to those he loves that he cannot ever touch again #and the fear of losing more that keeps him from letting down his guard #i'm delirious #the english #six of crows #shadow and bone netflix #abt

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