#les mis incorrect quotes

[kim-the-miserable-rat]

LES MIS INCORRECT QUOTES (part 3)

JAVERT

GRANTAIRE

JEHAN PROVUAIRE

ENJOLRAS

BAHOREL

BISHOP MYRIEL (to the national guards after Jean Valjean stole some of his silver)

JOLLLLY

EPONINE

MARIUS PONTMERCY

[uponthebarricade]

grantaire:

[askclato]

Enjolras: Send dudes.

Grantaire: You mean nudes?

Enjolras: I’m in a fight. I need more men.

[jeena-says-hi]

Eponine: Grantaire isn't answering his phone

Enjolras: I'll call

Eponine: Marius and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-

Grantaire: Hello?

[chrysalismandtea]

✨random les amis headcanons✨

enj’s favourite breakfast is cereal, but specifically those honey rings that taste really bland

at some point jehan was dog sitting for a friend who had a golden retriever and proceeded to call the dog enjolras for the whole week (and send videos to their group chat)

combeferre is the only person who has ever managed to seduce someone with a conspiracy theory. it involved quantum physics and johann sebastian bach.

on the subject of classical composers, joly knows every single note of chopin’s polonnaises and he even head bangs sometimes

bossuet wears sunglasses on top of his head year round

courf bikes everywhere (sweetheart)

marius and cosette religiously watch gossip girl (everyone thinks it’s because cosette likes it but it’s actually the other way round). once enjolras joined them and ended up leaving the apartment mumbling something about eating the rich

feuilly talks to his plants (he refers to his gardenias as “my ladies”, much to everyone’s annoyance)

eponine is the worst baker, but she makes the absolute BEST waffles, to the point everyone’s sick of them (they’re not)

bahorel has crushed more than three weddings (and only been kicked out once)

musichetta’s favourite song is, unironically, take on me by a-ha

grantaire only drinks coffee from a “world’s best grandma” mug (it was a gift from courf)

[altumvidetur]

Bossuet: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.

Enjolras: Wasn't Joly with you?

Joly: ...In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

[lesamiesdelalgbt]

Grantaire: Do you love me?

Enjolras: We're literally married

Grantaire: Yeah, but as friends or-

[les-mis-amiss]

[The backroom of the Musain before a meeting]

Enjolras : *wearing his new red coat*

Grantaire, walking in: Oh that fucks, you served, ate and left no crumbs! The drip is zesty and slaying. It's so Gucci, I am gagged. It doesn't give Ohio at all.

Enjolras, 20 different kinds of insulted: *opening and closing his mouth with a deepening frown*

Combeferre, not looking up from his notes: Grantaire, stop confusing our fearless leader or we're gonna have to reboot him.

Grantaire: Awwn, I was just trying to complimentmaxx, you know very friendcore, I'm just slangpilled.

Enjolras: I think I'm having a stroke

Eponine, from the back: And stop learning slang from Gavroche and Azelma.

[accio-barricade]

Enjolras: You need to change all of this *gestures*

Grantaire: You just gestured to all of me.

[shippingdissapointment]

ive seen like so many posts about how jonny sims doesnt know how to name characters things other than michael but like in les miserable three male characters had first names and two of them were fuckinh jean. one of them was basically john mcjohn and all the other male characters just went by their last names

[44ratsinatrenchcoat]

Enjolras in the 25th anniversary concert: All of you are fives except for Grantaire who is an eight and I support him Enjolras in the 2019 all-star cast: All of you are fives and that's okay. Not now Grantaire. Enjolras in the 10th anniversary concert: All of you are fives. Who the fuck is Grantaire? Enjolras in the book: all of you are threes, except for Grantaire who is a zero and deserves to die in a house fire. Enjolras in the 2012 movie: all of you are zeros who deserve to be killed by a weedwacker.

[kim-the-miserable-rat]

LES MIS INCORRECT QUOTES

(part 5, I think, im starting to lose track)

JAVERT AND JEAN VALJEAN

GAVROCHE

COMBEFERRE

BOSSUET 🦅

GRANTAIRE

BAHOREL (my homie has beef with the pope)

JOLLLLY

MONTPARNASSE

[uponthebarricade]

grantaire:

[askclato]

Enjolras: Are you a newspaper?

Marius: No, why?

Enjolras: Because there’s a new issue with you every fucking day.

[follies-and-feuillys]

The abcs and co. as my friends and various random citizens and also myself said: (currency changed)

JvJ: There’s this one cop that’s just on a constant power trip that fines you 50 francs over birdseed-

★★★★

Courfeyrac: there was poems in here but I ripped them out.

Jean Prouvaire: I wanna see!

Courfeyrac: NO!!! (Said with force)

★★★★

Combeferre: MOTH BAG!

Jean Prouvaire: moth bag?

Combeferre: *nodding* moth bag.

Jean Prouvaire: ………moth bag…

Combeferre: m o t h b a g.

★★★★

Javert: Well, the law says-!

JvJ: so?!?

Javert: you should listen to the law!

JvJ: if the law said to jump of a bridge, would you???

Javert: id jump regardless.

JvJ: … are you ok?

★★★★

Random person running down the street: I WON AN AWARD!!!

Enjolras: *looks at Grantaire, very confused* HELL YES YOU DID!! THANK YOU FOR THE INFORMATION RANDOM CITIZEN!

Grantaire: WOOP-DE-DOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Enjolras: OW!

Grantaire: I’M DRUNK ON CAFFEINE!!!!!!!!!

★★★★

*at a funeral* Mr. Thernardier disguised as the rich guy: So, who’s the dead guy?

Marius: … um, Feuilly?

Thernardier: Oh! My! God! Is he Polish? I love Polish people!!

★★★★

Jean Prouvaire: *looks up from writing.* holy shit. It’s August and the moon is yellow, like in my poem. Am I a prophet or am I crazy… or both?

Joly: you’re crazy.

Jean Prouvaire: …ok :(

★★★★

Enjolras: thank you random citizen for letting me take your picture. :) *shows Mabeuf a picture in which he resembles a skinwalker*

[chrysalismandtea]

les amis de l’abc as things me and my friends have said

enjolras: i wish i allowed myself to smoke just to escape functions

combeferre: i’d probably be better off as a jukebox

courfeyrac: (in a discussion about what we should make a podcast on) how many mini sandwiches i can eat in an hour?

jehan: dude i was dizzy when i was BORN

feuilly: (talking about cop shows) i’d make a great dead body

joly: (stressfully) you’ll leave me without a neck, and people without necks aren’t people, they’re corpses!

bossuet: hey, if i made you run errands without paying you would it be considered slavery?

bahorel: we have plenty of grass for you, too. goat (affectionately)

grantaire: (clearly sarcastically) today is my forte

marius: just think about it.. your children’s parent lives on this planet right now

eponine: manic pixie dream girl? nah, i said i’m a panic moxie grim girl

cosette: actually girlhood is listening to loud music and rearranging furniture

musichetta: dude they’re men, they only care about books and astrology